#the only reason why i dont do it on my blog is im bad at writing it and i get super flustered- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

skitskatdacat63 · 9 months

Note

are there any other historical figures you like I'm intrigued 👀

Okay buckle in, somehow this post will be weirder than any of my f1 stuff bcs for some reason I'm very intense about historical figures, I think I just have a tendency to treat them like blorbos

Mostly I'm endeared to powerful figures, idk why, it's the way it is. Okay so obviously you already know I like Napoleon(and Wellington to an extent), that really doesn't need to be emphasized anymore

Since being in Austria, I feel super endeared to Maria Theresa. She just seemed like such a boss! I think she's just really cool. Her father changed the plan of succession so she'd become Empress(rather than her cousins), but immediately upon taking power, she was immediately embroiled in war over her being the new ruler(everyone who had signed the treaty of succession suddeny reversed) But she defended her rule of the Habsburg monarchy! I think the coolest part about her is that her husband, who married into the Habsburgs, was supposed to be in charge, but she wouldn't let him be involved at all practically and was the de facto ruler of the Holy Roman Empire for like 20 years. She had 16 children and was basically constantly pregnant and having kids while involved in war, yet still held power and guided Austro-Hungary through it all 🥹 I think it's very funny also that she was laying out so many reforms, guiding the country basically just herself, and still found time to write letters to all their kids and be an overbearing mother. Also she was Marie Antoinette's mother?? I'm still shocked by how many important kids she had. If you've been to any part of the former Austro-Hungarian(+ Bohemian) Empire, she really left her mark, there's soooo much stuff named after her. The statue of her in between the Kunsthistorisches and the Natural History Museum in Vienna is really cool, and that she has a whole Platz named after her with her giant statue!!! I think it's just really admirable that a woman at that period of time had so much power and ruled so efficiently. (MY god sorry I wrote so much)

Okay now I'll try to refrain from the historical rambles, I also like: Julius Caeser(cliche sorry I know), Dmitri Shostakovich(my favorite composer ever), Pyotr Tchaikovsky(pls read about his sugar mommy patron), Erwin Rommel(I like his nickname: The Desert Fox), J.C. Leyendecker(favorite artist, I am obsessed with his work), Alphonse Mucha, Calvin Coolidge(not the best president by far but the anecdotes about his social awkwardness and quietness are hilarious to me), Ernst Gideon von Laudon(not completely insane about him, but it's like with the Napoleon Crossing the Alps painting, I saw a painting and bust of him and now feel weirdly endeared.) And then there's probably some others I can't recall atm because it's 3 am

I think my top three though are Napoleon, Julius Caesar and Maria Theresa. They're all just very: "Catie saw a painting/statue and is now very weird about it." And then being in the vicinity of so much history made it 1000x worse. Things I saw in Vienna that made me go "oh my god it's blorbo from my history book": Napoleon Crossing The Alps painting(I seriously sat in that room for probably 20 mins just staring at it, I didn't want to leave) + some other various Napoleon artifacts in the Heeresgesichtliche, a very nice bust of Julius Caesar, and literally the entirety of Vienna had Maria Theresa everywhere

#i said before but i do think its funny to have historical blorbos bcs it makes people go 'what is wrong with you'#all my friends on that trip soon learned my napoleon obsession once we stepped in that museum....#you guys are learning too much about my psyche between this and the OC posts #you thought I was unhinged only about F1? dont worry. it gets worse.#i just like reading and then holding info i guess so i can go on random rants #and history is the best to read about!!#mostly though im incapable of being normal about anything i have to be unhinged about it #but gahhhhhh im having actually a lot a lot of fun with all the napoleon stuff lately #thank you guys for encouraging me <3 #for some reason that era imprinted on my brain and its always there and i cant escape #so being able to use it and indulge in it is so much fun #also i found this random person's blog and they are way more knowledgeable abt Napoleon than me #i was having so much fun reading through their blog and learning!!!!#anyways yes here pls take my rambling this one is especially bad #why did you have to ask 😭 you dont know what you unleashed in me 😭😭😭#* gotta add #the napoleon thing is sooooooo bad #like ill see a tiny ref to him and ill get all 😍 about it #like i think one time in Russian we were reading names of historical figures in cyrillic #and i saw napoleon and i like had such a 'gasping maiden' moment #WHY AM I LIKE THIS WHY DID MY BRAIN DO THIS TO ME #i dont get it either so dont question it JDKFLGLG #i mentioned but someone asked me 'so why do you like napoleon so much' and im just ?????? i dont choose what i brainrot over.#catie.asks.#catie.rambling.txt #sorry its late and i feel deranged #no FPs for me! too busy and too tired

8 notes · View notes

snekdood · 11 months

Text

Quite honestly, i think people just dont like to acknowledge how many times i have been victimized bc it doesnt work for their narrative of the Scary Bad Trans Guy With No Regard For Others And Likes To Kick Puppies And Doesnt Know Real Pain Or Trauma

#bc otherwise yall would have to feel bad about putting me through way more additional unnecessary trauma on here #and i swear its yall who believe everything my abuser says about me. you need to tell yourself its true that i did the shit they accuse me #of and theyre just this pure uwu innocent pewson who doews no wongg umu #yall dont wanna except ive been through hell bc then you gotta accept youve put me through additional unnecessary hell that only warped my #perception worse of a community i thought i was fuckin part of and accepted in but apparently tf not #like you only have yourselves to blame for that shit. for why i hate online queer spaces now.#man it would just suck so so hard for your narrative if i was actually abused as much as i say and my abusive x was actually lying about me #bc otherwise how will you pretend trans men never ever experience any issues ever?#like i dont need to look. ik im one of the main blogs yall like to target and put on blast for transandrophobia stuff bc im super fuckin #outspoken about my shit (nevermind that yall never directly confront me). i already know thats how it is bc theres ppl on here who have a #apparently deep interest in constantly hating me and trying to find reasons im wrong. so when i say something is bad they habe to act like #its good actually somehow. and ik it all roots back to my abuser. there is literally no other reason i can think of that would mame ppl #that invested in hating me unless they believe everything my ex says. so undoubtedly theres ppl in my exs spaces who believe #transandrophobia is fake men arent oppressed ever etc etc. i digress. but ik its yall who've propped this whole shit up #ik its yall who put me on blast for this first and triwled to spread it that i was one of the Big Bad Names in the transandrophobia spaces #so ik yall use me as an example. ik you tell people i lie about everything. ik you tell people i exaggerate. ik you tell people im crazy #ik you tell ppl they cant trust me or rely on me and spread all the bs my ex says about me and even spreads their abuse toward me further #by even doing that shit. yall NEED to keep believing that im the Big Bad Trans Guy that you think i am bc otherwise your whole worldview #falls tf apart. everything you've been standing on online about how trans mascs who believe in transandrophobia are bad would fall apart.#if i am really as fuckin abused and victimized as i say. suddenly you dont get to use me as the example for Bad Transandrophobia Believer #and I KNOW thats the only reason yall choose not to listen or believe us. its LITERALLY just because you're choosing a side in a personal #relationship situation. ik it has nothing to do with politics for plenty of you. you're taking a side and shitting out reasons for why you #did after the fact.#if you really care about politics n shit you should listen to ALL THE OTHER TRANS MEN TALKING ABOUT THIS #besides using one person as your example for why you shouldnt believe people who believe this is a thing.#i mean. even aside the fucking fact that its all bs. if yall dont wanna believe me. whatever. you can get traumatized by them if you want #idefc at this point. if you actually care about politics as much as you say you gotta engage w people in good faith and uh maybe try n #listen to the SWATHES of other trans guys who also talk about this shit and thinks its real.

8 notes · View notes

dyketubbo · 2 years

Text

babygirl i have so many more bitchy opinions about this fandom that even my blog followers dont hear about

#sees a post and immediately has like 5 bitchy thoughts about it like girl chill out #shoutout to the cafe who have to hear my unfiltered opinions about like fucking everything #anyways this was brought by being tired of cranboo crit at this point. idk why but it just always makes me roll my eyes #is this how ctechno enthusiasts feel /hj #i suppose i just dont see the purpose in people deciding to just randomly shit on ranboo all the time #like ok we get it you think hes a shitty writer and that yout hink his character isnt interesting. can you at least tag crit #for the love of god #this post was also brought by perhaps having Opinions about tubbo3091 and being nitpicky #for clarification i dont think its a bad blog or extremely ooc or whatever #i just never get people hailing it as the One True ctubbo interpretation when like. from what i can see the point is to be Funny #i see tubbolul as a much more in character depiction of ctubbo in an rp blog #but really in general im just tired of depictions of ctubbo being an asshole to ghostboo #thats my ultimate break off of enjoyment with ctubbo depictions is if theyre like unrelentingly an ass for ghostboo for no real reason #without like. consideration to how he actually acts which isnt like. bitchy or passive aggressive #but just vaguely distant and at times dismissive #i do think hed be kind of a dick sure but like. not by actively insulting or yelling at/about ghostboo #i think theres plenty of interesting ways to go about ctubbo being sort of a jerk to ghostboo at times #but im personally burnt out on depictions where hes actively a dick that only sees ghostboo as a big nuisance #idk exactly how to articulate it its just something that has to be done in a specific way or else i roll my eyes #mask mews #negative

21 notes · View notes

thebleedingeffect · 1 year

Text

#warning you know this is a bit of a vent so do not ye go any further if you dont wanna see bad vibes lmao #anyway. my father is an absolute bastard of a man. emotionally neglected my mother. was an absent father. and very nearly-#killed us both towards the very end lmao. just a horrible guy who hides behind his charisma and has never processed an emotion once #instead likes to emotionally neglect and gaslit people instead of idk... going to therapy instead of retreating to church lmao #anyway its been around three years since I've seen him irl and im very happy about that. i never want to hear from him again #but he snagged some foreign young woman whos nearly my age and yeah. its disgusting but not surprising #theyre having a kid apparently and the only reason i know is cause my mom told me. but i really need to have a talk with her and its going-#to suck #i need to talk to her about never bringing him or her up around me ever again and this boundary is a hard one im gonna have to establish #cause shes still so scared of him and cant help following his every move. but im gonna have to pin her down and play therapist and ARRGGHH #I GOTTA PLAY THERAPISTTTT WHY WAS I CURSED TO BE AN ONLY DAUGHTER. WHOS ONLY FAMILY IS THEIR MOTHER #THEREFORE IM THE ONLY ONE CLOSEST AND KNOWS OF THE SHIT SHES GOING THROUGH AKA I GOTTA FUCKIN BEAT IT INTO HER #im gonna-- HELP GIRL #strange lore to drop but god imagine almost being killed by your dad and surviving by pure luck. cringe moment #i cannot imagine if i left this life and my blog wouldve been stuck in 2017... imagine dying as a marvel blog SKSKSKSKS #anyway. this life man.

6 notes · View notes

rzyraffek · 11 months

Note

I have a little smut request, if you don't like or don't want to write I understand that's alright.

When slashers are take a shower then S/O suddenly get in

Bo please must have him, I love this man too much, and Vincent, Lester, Brahms, Thomas, or other slashers you want to write. (or you think I pick too much you can pick some, but please Bo must thank you so much❤️)

I just think this will be fun

Oh, btw, I very love your work so perfect so wonderful so amazing❤️❤️❤️

Yall really love Sinclair's😭😭 ALSO THANK YOU V MUCH IM GLAD YALL ENJOY MY BLOG!!!! Before you read that I need to remind yall that I DONT USUALLY WRITE NSFW STUFF SO DONT EXPECT ANYTHING GREAT HERE!! Request open

Nsfw, but nothing too detailed, they/them pronouns for s/o

Shower zegz with slashers

Bo Sinclair

Our guy will make sure that they will remember that shower for long time

Yknow when you just vibe in shower and you accidently touch cold wall with your back and get all cold and upset? Yeah if s/o has the same problem.. too bad he doenst care they are getting pinned to that wall in seconds anyways

He loves seeing their face, how they react to his actions and words, how their body moves because of him

Will comment A LOT, expect a lot of praising, some cruse words and alot of growls tbh

He marks them 100% one way or another. Bite marks, Hickeys ( alot of them), ect

Afterwards he gonna bring them a towel and make sure they can go to bedroom and rest there for a while. This guy isn't the best at aftercare but he isn't heartless!

Vincent

No bcs he will blush sososo hard😨😳

Like they have to make first move cuz this guy will just stand there awkwardly looking like he has stick up his ass

He gonna be so gentle with them💖 carefully grabbing their hips/hair and enjoying the view moment

Tbh he loves grabbing their hair and vice versa, if s/o is touchy he gonna be sosos blushy

Also afterward he gonna wash their hair probably🥰 making sure they at least get out of this shower clean lol

Brahms Heelshire

Nah bcs this guy will be the one to actually pull them into shower, like s/o was just vibing doing their skincare routine and this guy just grabbed them and yeeted them into shower

He gonna act like he just wants to spent time together🙄🙄 yeah totally

Pls make sure that s/o calls him good boi or he gonna bite them

Also ngl he probably looks sexy asf with wet hair

Incredibly affectionate, yall will be extremely close to each other for the whole thing. And expect him to wisper and growl into s/o year

Thomas Hewitt

This babi will be soso confused??? Like???? Oh you wanna shower together?? Yeah sure ig I don't mind???

Again s/o has to do first move cuz he won't even think about asking them about that type of stuff! Hes a gentleman he would neverr.. unless they ask him ofc

S/o gonna forgor how to walk for few hours at least

He just gonna pick them up and pin them to wall like s/o weights nothing (tbh it doesnt really matter how much they weight this guy picked up adult men and whooped other one at the same time without any struggle, really dont worry)

He cant really tell them how he feels so he just gonna gently pat them or nuzzle them.

He will feel bad afterwards when their legs shake or when they can't really walk 😓

Micheal Myers

Tbh the only reason he showed was bcs they promised him that he will get reward later. Fr this guy stinks

Sex with him is incredibly akward. He doenst make any noise nor shows any kind of affection? Maybe he gonna carry them to bed afterwards or bring them towel?? Like this guy never heard about aftercare, or care overall tbh

He will never show it but he loves when s/o gives him affection or tells him nice words, how good he is and how great his doing his job rn

Not my proudest one! I really suck at nsfw stuff sorry😓😓 also I had nightmare and there was Bo for some reason ?? But he had heavy cowboy-texas accent ??? Idk why. Anyways its 2am yall have great rest of day

This post was made by asexual gang, like and subscribe to join asexual gang

2K notes · View notes

tyunni · 1 year

Text

NISHIMURA RIKI B☆YFRIEND HEADCANONS...

ㅤㅤㅤㅤenhypen masterlist | library | ni-ki bf hc part 1

a/n: man when will it be may over riki era... probably never. anyways pt 2 to my riki bf headcanons post 😭 p.s. i DID post this on a side blog a while ago to try out tags so if u saw that no u didnt lol

genre: fluff ☝️ warnings: not proofread, kissing, if you want me to add anything please let me know!

idrk how to start this off so we're just gonna get str8 into it yeah lets GO

he is so whipped for you it's actually concerning. everyone can tell he is absolutely head over heels for you. from the way his eyes sparkle when he looks at you to the way he can't shut up about you, it's just so obvious.

he adores you, honestly.

he can't help but smile when he sees you, always admiring you. doesn't matter what you're doing; be it you brushing your teeth, eating food, putting your shoes on, or sleeping. doesn't matter! he's watching you with hearts in his eyes and a grin spread across his face from ear to ear.

his heart swells whenever you hug and/or kiss him. he may not act like it, but he is so soft for you it's actually insane. he melts in your arms the second you wrap them around him. feels safe and content, closing his eyes as he buries his head in your shoulder.

physical affection is very very important to him, it makes him feel special. he enjoys it more than he likes to admit, to be honest!

he loves loves loves kisses!! you littering kisses all over his face? he's down. him littering kisses all over your face? he's down. a kiss on his cheek? absolutely! giving him a big phat smooch on the lips?? you just made him the happiest boy ever!!!!!

(more under the cut!)

if you cup his face in your hands and just enjoy the moment as you get lost in each other's eyes he will get all mushy and lovey dovey. it's moments like these that make him realize just how in love he is with you, how much he cherishes you, and how he wants to show you he appreciates you.

riki isn't really the best with words, it's a bit awkward for him to verbalize his feelings toward you... and also impossible as well, because he simply can not describe the overwhelming amount of love he has for you.

but whenever the time calls, he can list a thousand reasons as to why he fell in love with you. from your beauty to your personality, he notices things about you even you don't notice, and it never fails to make you smile (which is basically all that matters to him)

3AM dates with riki? 3AM dates with riki.

it's a must, honestly. whenever he can't sleep he almost always messages you. he doesn't like to bother you, but he can't help it! he's so bored and you're his s/o, who else would he spam at like 2 in the morning??

he's always amused when you answer him & complain about how you were about to go to sleep and how he disturbed you. but he knows you're lying by the way you're refusing to leave when he tells you he won't mind if you go to bed and that he can always just go back to scrolling through tiktok.

"oh you're sleepy? okay 👍 i'll just go back to tiktok then" "NO DONT GO IM NOT GOING TO SLEEP YET"

and when he offers to go snack hunting at a 24 hour convenience store, who are you to refuse? and even if you were to refuse... too bad he's literally at your door right now, open up y/n <3

sometimes he doesn't even message you beforehand, he just randomly shows up at your house and the next thing you know you're taking a walk while everyone else in your neighborhood is sound asleep.

tries his best to be super cliche romantic with you. says he does it only cuz he knows you want him to do it, when in reality a part of him has always wanted to recreate those overused cute scenes in romance movies.

he will never admit to it, but sometimes he purposefully sets your dates on the days he knows there will be rain. he checks the weather beforehand just to make sure it's a rainy day 😭

but why? you may ask...

so he can take off his warm jacket and drape it over your figure when he notices you shaking and shivering beside him. so he can pull out his umbrella - specifically the smallest umbrella he could find at the dorms so he has an excuse to pull your body against his side and protect you from the rain droplets that slowly fall onto the top of your head.

and most importantly, so he can walk you home, discard the umbrella once he reaches your doorstep, watch as the rain drops glide down from your head to your face. and then he leans in and gently wipes them away from your features as he smiles softly when he notices your breath hitch at the close proximity. his hands then find their way to your cheeks, thumbs wiping away more droplets as the rain gets heavier and heavier. and at this point neither of you care that your clothes are basically drenched. all that you can focus on is how he's so gently holding your face in his hands, how he's looking into your eyes with so much love and adoration, and how he is so close to you that you can admire all the pretty moles that are scattered across his face, thinking that it's impossible for him to get any closer. but when he tilts his head and somehow shortens the proximity even more you can't help but flutter your eyes shut as you feel his lips lightly graze over yours. but he doesn't kiss you. he simply smiles before completely pulling away, grabbing his umbrella and walking off.

Yeah HE'S ANNOYING 😑😑😑👎👎👎

and when u run inside your house pull out ur phone and proceed to spam him telling him he can't just do that & that if he pulls that shit on you ever again ure gonna break up w him...

yeah he just smirks 🧍‍♀️ bcuz he knows u dont mean it- OF COURSE U DON'T- he's got u wrapped around his finger, there's no way out, i fear...

but let's not pretend he's not wrapped around your finger... cuz he is.

if you suddenly call him to hang out or tell him you miss him he is basically running to your location!!

but not before pretending that he's too busy and complaining about how you're so "needy" and "obsessed" with him, but in a lighthearted manner obviously.

he would rather step on a bunch of spikey nails with his bare feet than upset you with his words. and if he feels that his words affected you in a bad way he will kiss you all over your face and reassure you that he didn't mean it like that

he's soft but just for you 🫰

well... maybe not just for you but he's definitely the most comfortable showing you his soft side 🫶 you're basically the only one he doesn't feel awkward sharing his lovey dovey mushy thoughts with

even though he's confident now, just like the first few months of your relationship, he still gets shy around you. he thinks it's embarrassing, but you think it's cute :)

for example, when he tries to call you new pet names that you two aren't usually used to.

the second the word sweetheart left his lips he immediately turned away from your figure, hid his face in his hands and cringed at himself for even contemplating calling you that. you had to practically beg him to turn around because he was refusing to look at you for a good 5 minutes 😭

"that was so bad, y/n. why did i say that?"

and then he whines about it to you so if you want him to shut up you have to hold his face and give him a quick kiss

one time you tried shutting him up by putting your hand over his mouth... but it backfired. he licked your palm 🧍‍♀️ so naturally, you used his shirt as a tissue and wiped your palm on him while complaining about how gross he was

yeah... a kiss it is.

speaking of kisses, he loves them

more specifically, he loves catching you off guard with them.

you two could be play fighting with pillows, watching a movie, bickering, cuddling, simply talking and suddenly his lips are on yours?

mostly he pulls this on you when you two are playing video games and he feels that there's a chance he might lose to you

he puts down his controller, gently grabs your chin, squishes your cheeks so your lips pout and gently puts his plush lips on yours.

inevitably, you close your eyes. biggest mistake you've ever made.

with one hand still squishing your cheeks and his lips still moving in sync with yours, he uses his other hand to pick up his controller and beats your ass in the game

when you hear the victory cheers coming from the TV you quickly open your eyes and gasp in shock at the sight of the screen.

you call him a dirty cheater, which is true...

but is it really cheating if he's kissing you?

"you cheated!! you were kissing me just to distract me, what the hell?!"

"it's not cheating if you don't get caught 😁"

"that doesn't even apply to this scena-"

boom! he kisses you again.

he's a shithead. but he's your shithead.

©tyunni please don't copy, translate or repost any of my work!

taglist: @geombyu @junityy @uygmoeb @sunghun @krewified @eternallyhyucks @pshjae @marknaeroni @feyregels @yyx2 @koishua @kac-chowsballs @echo-of-a-writer @w3bqrl @liz-riz @duolingofanaccount @goldenhypen @sungniverse @enhasimpeu @sieuneo @acciomylove @soobin-chois @anik-4 @yjwfav @ja4hyvn @ddeonubaby @deafeningballoonnacho @squiishymeow @odxrilove @iyeonjuni @nyaforniki @kittyeji @pinkyyyujin @addictedtothesummernights @love-4-keum @luveill @enhastolemyheart @kpop-kitkat @kageyama-i-want-tobiors (bold means i can’t mention you, if you want to be a part of my taglist fill this out!!)

2K notes · View notes

am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 month

Note

WIBTA if i cut off someone reaching out for help on tumblr? i am a very anxious person. ive been on tumblr a very long time because most all other social media terrifies me as someone who grew up with the wild west internet a decade past (im in my late 20s) so i feel sometimes with how reckless and spurractic people can be online in chatroom and especially clearly public platforms where any stranger, malicious or otherwise can just archive your digital presence for personal use.

more recently as someone who has been here during the pornban and as an asexual really enjoyed the quiet with no drama farming and a slow pace to talk about more unique political topics in a measured way it is something im strangely nostalgic for and a great example of my sensibilities to people when they insist that i use other platforms like discord or twitter or whatever clone for these services comes out of the old guard introducing feature creep to copy everyone else or any other indi "were the anti corporate version" of the endless scroll apps. i just dont want it. tumblr is special because im desktop only, been here for years, and i have kept track of every single change made so i have manually adjusted the change through hacks to evade every bad decision on here and make my set up look identical to how it was in 2010. so let it be understood that i tend to be a loney person because of this stubbornness. web 3.0 is too dangerous to people with addictive tendencies that my adhd brings out and my need to wear my heart on my sleeve. so i hope i defended my personality type enough to show why someone like me would see a post about some horrible abuses they have fell victim to who also share alot of the marginalized status as me and writing depressive things in the replys of others posts as to attention seek about it.

i directly interact with this person, not only to check if they are real (but wow, modern chat bots make this part horrifying for me. we really cant ever know for sure what is real anymore. trying to find warmth on the internet feels impossible now a days) i have multiple conversations at this point both venting and just casually shooting the shit. but the begging for me to constantly repost their paypal makes me so nervous in a way that i feel so guilty for because it reminds me of all the scams that get associated with this kind of ebegging and the reminder that capitalism takes away all warmth from human interaction to make them purely transnational and conditional. but then it just has been escalating where im so scared that now its not enough that im reposing on my 8 follower, all mutual blog, they are asking me to share it on other socials. accounts i do not have i have a flip phone and a laptop and i am tinkering with a windows 7 tower that will never be connected to the internet so i can always have software sit perfectly in its time capsule for when i need it. i do not have a way to help this person outside of what i learned from collage psyche classes. a part of me is so scared to just abruptly cut them off and just delete my entire account like i tend to do often on tumblr for a multitude of reasons, its a part of what lets people survive being here this long but i worry that would crush them if i did that, i dont want to make them feel more hopeless and unwanted then they already talk about. but i am text on the internet through a screen. i can only do so much. so would i be the asshole if i just deleted my account with a "i hope you hang in there, the world is a harsh place but keep moving" to cut someone so similar to me who is struggling out of my life?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

96 notes · View notes

rez-urrection · 2 months

Text

I saw someone else on here saying how Rick needs someone with a different moral compass to go with him on adventures because otherwise it'd be an echo chamber of bad decisions, and thats why he brings Morty (very outspoken against him) rather than Summer (very often outspoken against him, however very much aligns with his violent impulses)

and I agreed with that, however I wanted to add my own theory as to why he brings only Morty, which kind of goes along with theirs.

I lost their post/url so I dont know who it is who posted that, but if I find it ill reblog with a link to their post, or if one of you find it youre welcome to do that for me !!

okay, so. it seems to me that another reason Rick would take Morty most times and not usually Summer is not only because Summer is more likely to become a moral echo chamber, but because Morty is the most likely in the family to not end up another Rick.

let me explain what I mean:

Rick has witnessed the citadel and how that ended up, he's implied to have witnessed the deaths of so many people (not just Ricks) for being too confident in their smarts. he knows that his life style kind of ruins you if youre as smart as he is because you start getting to know that you are.

this won't happen with Morty.

Morty is a lot of things; resourceful, highly adaptive, good in combat (when he can be), quick on his feet and passionate. but one thing he isnt, is like Rick.

Morty gets none of his traits from Beth or Rick. he isnt inhumanely smart (in fact its canon that he's quite the opposite), he isnt predisposed to being cold and uncaring, he isnt as impulsive (he still is, just not as much), the list goes on.

not only are Summer and Beth predisposed to end up like Rick, they have, on many occasions, acted exactly how Rick would've acted in situations. and to me, it seems like that scares him.

Morty however is very different to Rick, and Rick knows that very few Mortys ever end up even a fraction of the man he is.

Mortys are not predisposed to end up cold and uncaring, in fact Mortys are predisposed to be the exact opposite. Mortys are "hardwired for forgiveness." theyre empathetic, loving, forgiving. Mortys rarely harden into the kind of person Rick is, or the kind of person Summer and Beth would be.

Morty is the obvious answer to who Rick should rely on - he'll never be bad. Morty is good at his core. at least most of them are, of course just like there's outlier Ricks (c-137 himself), there's outlier Mortys, but as a general statement, Mortys are good at their core.

kind of off topic, but I also beleive that c-137 is good at his core.

let me explain.

he is, by admission, a different kind of Rick. he wanted to stay home, to be there for the girls, he was even willing to give up his dream of science just to be there for him.

when they died, so did a part of him.

he lost the love of his life, and he lost his daughter. he lost his perfect little family.

and what did he do ? go insane trying to find the person who did this to him, and get rid of them.

the things he did on the way were kind of a "in the grand scheme of things" type of situation.

again another blog already said this (here) (hopefully that worked), but when Prime said he c-137 could've been him- he already was. he was in the exact same situation that Prime was. he offered someone infinity, and they rejected it. but instead of going the way Prime did, which was killing the people around Bird Person to force him to travel infinity anyways, he just moved on. he got upset at first and tossed some weak insults, but he moved on. because, as the above post says, its not that big of a deal. it wasn't the end of the world for him.

now, im not saying c-137 has never done anything wrong. hes done a lot of things wrong. what I am saying is he's good at his core; his goal was never and still isn't just to hurt people. his goal is revenge and in his eyes, its a ticking time bomb. anyone in his way has to be swiftly dealt with because he's running out of time.

also - of course he can't show how much he loves Morty. he doesnt know if Prime is still watching him, but he does know that the Omega Device could very well still be on operation, and he finds out he was correct in this assumption in Ultmortricken.

if he had shown his love for Morty often at all, who knows what Prime would've done with that information.

#goodness fucking gravy this got ranty #i love rick and morty can you tell #rick and morty #rick sanchez #r&m #rnm #c-137 #c-137 obviously #bird person #rbp #anyways rick and bird person 100 years #beth smith #beth sanchez #jerry smith #summer smith #morty smith #rick c137 #morty prime

86 notes · View notes

lailoken · 7 months

Note

ok this is prolly a Dumbass question. but a lot of witchcraft ppl seem to use plants like datura, belladona, aconite, for their psychoactive properties in witchcraft- Are there any witchcraft people that just skip the whole plant foraging/gardening/obtaining bit and decide to just do shrooms or acid, or benadryl/dph i guess if one happens to just like deleriants? dph is rlly bad for health (is so bad) but tbh so is datura,.. though dph you can usually get at a convenince store. Or is it not considered spiritual if it’s a synthetic?

(I dont mean this to be offensive btw i think occult things r cool and im faded than a hoe rn. Coolio blog)

I'm sure there are practitioners who attempt to undergo Poison Path work using only synthetic drugs, but I don't really know anything about that, and so I can't speak to it very well.

I do, however, believe that working with the spirits of plants is at least as important to the process of such work as the psychoactive effects. I can grasp working with the spirit of Belladonna, but I have a much harder time envisioning myself trying to work with the spirit of a drugstore antihistamine. I also believe it's meaningful that many entheogenic plants (such as ones you listed here, including Psilocybin Mushrooms) have a longstanding traditional record of religious/cultic usage by initiated masters in their respective cultures. For these reasons, among others, I would not consider using synthetic, storebought drugs.

I also think there is a big difference between someone who messes around with party drugs and likes the idea of trying to get a bit spiritual with it, and someone who conscientiously dedicates themselves to Poison Path work. Altered brain chemistry can help the mind to see past certain filters and preconceptions, and it can also help one to look inward, but if there isn't a thoughtful, purposeful, and spiritual framework behind using an entheogenic substance, then it seems likely that it's mostly about getting high.

Finally, I want to add that, while substances such as datura are definitely dangerous, they are often used with far more reverence, caution, and frugality when approached by a serious practitioner. My husband is Oathbound to the Tutelary Spirit of Datura, but only once, under extraordinary circumstances, has that included using the plant entheogenically. He undertook the ritual with fearful respect and the utmost care, and it was an extremely meaningful experience for him, but it's not one he's likely to undertake again anytime soon. As he puts it, "She is a harsh teacher." I think part of the reason so many of these plants (particularly poisonous varieties of Ranunculaceae and Solanacea) are as harsh as they are is because they demand commitment and humility (along with self-defense, of course), which is why you pretty much hear only horror stories from most folks who attempt to use such substances lightly.

#anonymous #ask #poison path #entheogens #drugs #witchcraft #traditional withcraft #magic #spirit flight #flying ointment #Datura #Belladonna #Aconite

80 notes · View notes

total-drama-takes-the-squeakquel · 16 days

Note

https://www.tumblr.com/total-drama-takes-the-squeakquel/745766171453833216/we-know-everyones-favs-by-now-so-i-dare-all-of?source=share

LEAST fav character lets go:

jo. self explanatory LMAO i think ive ranted about the worst character in the series enough. the jo dickriders are still mad at me but what can you do about it. not my fault jo sucks. god ive got to get back to ranting about her more.

umm like idk i only rlly despise joee????? mike too. mike is annoying asf

harold

mal

cody

favorite ships!!! 1. duncney/heathney.... theyre tired and i love them too much sorry lol.

2. skyellaaaa omfg. theyre so cute

3. gwoey. ugh all stars did one good thing and gave me that zoey/gwen friendship man. i like them alr

4. mkulia

5. yeah theres not that many ships im passionate about.

LEAST favorite ships: 1. any jo ships. yes even the yuri ones. idk she or he or whatever idgaf abotu what to call her. jo doesnt deseve love or respect and thats my point. jomaria is like. um whatever. JOCK IS SO FUCKING BADDD like brick annoys me because hes a fucking simp for jo. like why was bro willing to disloate his hip just to impress JOE lie its not worth it lol. i do agree that brick was completely down bad for her all the way but also like. idk jo doesnt deserve love. brick was annoying for being so down bad for her and thats one of the reasons i hate jock. just ebcause it pissed me off all the way. anne maria is my fav of all time idk yeah so i dont watched her paired up with that bitch jo. also jourtney is pretty atrocious as well bc courtney can do sm better cmon now. are we pulling ships out of our ass now???? ugh

2. idk im lowkey yaoiphobic so like. any yaoi ship. esp gen2 yaoi i dont like gen2 yaoi. LOL im only homophobic towards yaoi ships tbh theyre all prettyyyy overrated ihvbnjk 😭😭😭 also im a yuri enthusiast (unless its she who shall not be named yuri bc like. jo doesnt deserve that. jo doesnt deserve love like cmon now). every m/m ship in this fandom is highly overrated any way

3. ripaxel

4. BRAWN AND DAWNB LIKE WHY ARE THOSE SHIPPERS ALWAYS SOME OF THE MOST ANNOYING PEOPLE IVE EVER MET/????? ALWAYS SO FUCKING OVER AGGRESSIVE OVER IT LIKE OMFGGGGG. "yeah heres my 9 paged essay on why dott IS SO SHIT!!!!!!! THEYRE SO TOXIC AND BAD I FUCKING HATE THEM EWWWW!!!!!!!!" like ong it aint that deep omfgggg. brawn shippers are just aggressive for no reason idk. also i wanna start calling brawn dick it just sounds funnier lol.,,

5. yeah not sure what to put here. like i said my lifes purpose is to hate on joe.

yayy thats all. jock is for sure my number 1 least fav tho lol. still cant believe i got my first imposter on the anon island blog lmao.

-jater

#hm #total drama #jater #long post #character hate #yaoi takes #ship hate

21 notes · View notes

kurolumiis · 2 days

Text

it’s recently been brought to my attention that someone has made a callout post about me, so i wanted do discuss a few things, ive never gatekept a FICTIONAL character. they are FICTIONAL for a reason. anyone is allowed to enjoy them, sure i have an attachment to them but ill never bash someone for liking them like i do. the characters i selfship with i am uncomfy with sharing, but i never will ‘gatekeep’ them. that’s weird. as for nsfw, it is my blog. i now use this as a sfw blog but pls, leave me and my blog alone if ur uncomfy with a minor writing nsfw. it is how i cope with my trauma and you have no right to take that way from me. i never go into mdni spaces as im still 17. i only interact with people who allow me to interact with them.

also remember, im still learning and developing, im bound to make mistakes. but i will never gatekeep a character or intrude on a space where i am not wanted.

edit: i knew this person about a year ago before i cut ties with them and their friends, so im not sure why the person who came out with this post decided to post this now.

edit 2: ive said some things in the past that i am not proud of. i never intended on guilt tripping anyone, i was going through a vulnerable time and thought this outlet i used was a safe space. i am learning and evolving from my mistakes in the past and my past does not define me, especially with who i am now.

edit 2: i realized i might’ve been wrong about the date of when i last talked to these people, i believe it was around a year ago but i have such a poor memory and these months have been long and exhausting i cannot remember. it’s also part of my coping and PTSD that i try to erase bad memories from my mind. so they could be right about the timeline, but im honestly not sure. ive seen someone speaking out against the poster and i completely agree with them. i dont want to be consuming this content, but its how i cope and cannot control it. i take safety precautions when im online and only interact with nsfw content my mutuals around my age produce. because of this experience, ive been so distraught that i might end consuming this content altogether. but it also comes in phases for me so the thoughts might come back.

i also want to apologize for my actions about my attachment to fictional characters. im not going to apologize for being attached, but my behavior and expressing myself in that way. i never intended on guilt tripping or manipulating anyone, i was going through an emotional time and let my emotions get the best of me, and like i said, i thought the place i expressed those thoughts in were a safe place. i promise while i still might have those thoughts (that im unable to control), i now keep them to myself and am learning ways to cope with it.

15 notes · View notes

jennaissantes · 1 year

Text

homophobia issue …

first of all,,, im bisexual!! so if anyone has a problem with that, please get off my blog. i will not be tolerating homophobia of any kind.

i really, really didn’t want to have to come out in this way, bc the situation is so bad right now. i really didnt expect enhablr to be facing this kind of a problem.

when i first heard about the issue, i was thoroughly shocked. like completely.

before anything, ill let you all read the definition of homophobia.

“discrimination” “dislike against the community” this. disrespect falls in the category of homophobia as well.

now to address the issue at hand. i wasnt directly involved in this problem. some of you may even be wondering why im making a post about it.

but as a part of the lgbtq community, i think id like to speak what i feel about this.

the situation we heard about was that an enhablr writer, had written dni: lgbtq in their account, which literally anyone would be surprised or angry at, especially if you belong to the community.

OP’s friend, who had recently become my mutual, was defending OP’s actions, which made me think of unfollowing them and i wanted to unfriend them. but then i found out it involves religion.

religion is a very sensitive topic for everyone and could go wrong in multiple ways. i respect all religions and beliefs.

so i texted OP’s friend, asking about the situation at hand, in case it was a misunderstanding.

i am aware that the quran forbids acting on gay feelings. it teaches you to not accept the gay ‘Lot’. (i have done my reading on this topic so i rlly hope im not saying anything out of line. if i am, please forgive me.)

but as far as i know, and have heard from my other islamic friends, the quran also tells you to respect and love everyone, no matter what they are or identify as. respect and acceptance are two different things. islam doe not encourage lgbtq, but doesnt tell u to NOT respect people of every kind.

if what they say is correct, then being on tumblr and reading and writing fanfictions is very much considered as haram as well.

in the above conversation, i texted them wanting to hear their side of the story as well. OP’s friend constantly used the word ‘opinion’ along with ‘belief’.

now, opinion and beliefs are two different things. opinion is something that YOU FOLLOW on your own will. belief is something that your religion teaches you to follow, against your will or not. you can notice OP’s friend has used the word opinion quite a lot.

OP’s friend had received an ask and this was their response.

‘everybody has their own opinion.’

again, the word opinion is used here, which conveys to us that they’re not wanting to interact with lgbtq community on their own accord.

i tried to explain that most of us get enough hate for being a part of the lgbtq community, and seeing dni:lgbtq, doesnt make it any better.

now, about OP.

when OP was answering asks, most of their answers were very mixed up,

in the third picture, you’ll see ive highlighted a sentence.

they say THEY DONT LIKE lgbtq. usage of first person is used. “i don’t like what they’re doing” which conveys their opinion on the community.

in the first picture, they claim that if tumblr was only lgbtq people, they’d never stay. how mean is that?

second slide, ‘escaping them’ escaping us????????? what does that even mean.

there was another pic, (that i cant add rn bc tumblr has an image limit), where they said “why do people have a problem w us saying dni lgbtq but no one has a problem if people say dni homophobic?”

… are they being for real.

i genuinely dont think they understand the situation properly. they keep saying the same thing, and mixing up opinions and beliefs.

the replies under OP’s pinned post were terrible. people said things like “im so sorry. what they’re doing is so fucking messed up.” we wouldn’t call out people for no reason just like that???

extra info: OP had written a suggestive niki fic before too.

people of the lgbtq community are humans too. it doesnt make us any different from everyone. please stop treating anyone differently, we are all of the same bone. spread positivity and happiness, not this negative energy.

please feel free to dm me if you’d like to rant abt anything! im here to listen anytime ❤️

please reblog this!

tagging mutuals: @haknom @amakumos @soov @soobnny @dazed-hee @chiyuv @delcakoo @dearheemain @kimsohn @goldenhypen @wonieleles @jaeyunverse @haerinz @hanniluvi [my head is poundinggggg rn so im sorry if i forgot anyone!]

#— important #📞— user jennaissantes needs to put the phone down #enhypen #enhypen fluff

124 notes · View notes

crazystargirl · 9 months

Note

Hii, just wanted to pass by and let you know that your blog has such a nice theme and I loveeee.

Also saw that you have requests !

So how about some Ethan Landry with some really heavy angst, with a sad ending.

I’m just in a sad mood and need my feelings more hurt ☹️

hope that’s not to much to ask for, take your time too ! please and thank you !

sincerely, ‘💐’ anon ! 💓

we'll get through this ♥︎

pairing ♥︎ - ethan landry x fem!reader

word count ♥︎ - 0.9k

a/n ♥︎ - awww 💐 anon i hope you're feeling better, tbh i don't understand why you want to feel worse but im also the kind when i dont feel happy, i curl up on the ground and listen to lana del rey and just cry, so i cannot be talking lmao. first time ever writing angst and as someone who hates angst to her very core i only added the angst towards like the ending and made it a sad ending. also i love the idea of having different kinds of anons!!

you came home as usual, nothing seeming to be wrong but it was eerily quiet. you had a bad feeling, something that you always got whenever ghostface had attacked your friends

you were always on edge ever since the attacks but even more now, something was going to happen.

suddenly your phone rings, making you jump and grab a knife just in case.

you look at the caller id, it reads quinn bailey

you scrunch your brows in confusion, wasn't quinn dead?

you slowly pick it up and put the phone on speaker

"hello?"

"hello y/n"

you froze at the voice, ghostface decided that you'd be the next victim which was not great at all because barely anyone ever survived their attacks

"what do you want?" you ask gripping the knife and going to call the police with the landline

"don't you dare call the police or I'll rip ethan's head!" ghostface yelled

"wait what?"

your phone vibrates, indicating that you got a new text, you look at it, seeing a photo of ethan sitting on his bed studying.

the photo looks like it was taken from far away but you could see ethan looking in the direction of it…thats strange

you quickly texted him to come over since ghostface was at your house

"why are you doing this? why can't you bastards find something to do other than running around and killing your friends?" you say trying to stall a bit

"oh but y/n it's fun, you wouldn’t understand it though because you're the little sweet, dumb girl who had the misfortune of falling for the shy and dorky nerd who might be ghostface"

you scoff, "he's my boyfriend and not ghostface, at least i can find a boyfriend unlike you who's so pathetic that you have to go around calling girls who have boyfriends for fun"

ghostface doesn't say anything, you think you hear another voice from the phone. ethan then texts you back and said he was coming asap

since there was silence for another minute you're about to hang up until ghostface speaks again

"were you about to hang up?"

you froze, "how did you know that?"

"sweetie i can see you right now"

you turn around and scream at the sight of ghostface, for some reason you noticed the ghostface was around the same height as you which immediately made you think it was a girl

you started running but ghostface was right on your tail, getting close enough for them to stab you in the shoulder

you scream out at the pain, managing to catch ghostface off guard and slam a pan at their head

just as you reach the door ghostface grabs you and pulls you back, stabbing you in the stomach

you let out another blood curdling scream, the pain of it hurting you so badly. you see ghostface about to raise their knife again before you kick them in the crotch

that managed to keep them distracted and you hoped that it was a male since you knew it would hurt like hell if it was one

you ran to your room and locked the door, moving furniture against it to make sure ghostface couldn't get in

since there was a fire escape in your room, you headed towards there only to be grabbed and thrown against the floor

you clutched your wounds, which continued to bleed out, making you lose blood

ghostface looked down at your wounds and laughed, stabbing you once more

you scream out again and then just stop, causing ghostface to bend down and look at you

you watched them take out their phone and call someone, it took everything in you not to scream out and cry

just then ethan runs into the room looking at ghostface

"quinn what the fuck did you do to her?!" ethan said as he ran to your body, clutching you close to him

you felt him put your face to his chest, cradling you closely as ghostface or quinn laughs

"well ethan you were too distracted by her, it was clear you weren't going to kill her so i did for you"

"get out! just leave me alone quinn"

quinn laughs and leaves while ethan lets out a sob

"eth…im still here or somewhat" you laugh weakly and pull your face from his chest

it broke his heart to see you in a state like this, tears staining your cheeks and your body bloody

"we need to get you to a hospital quickly"

you give him a small kiss at the corner of his mouth, "no it's ok really, i'm going to die either way"

"no you are going to survive baby" he said putting pressure on your wound

you giggle, feeling delirious at this point, "eth you have really pretty eyes"

"no no no baby don't die please not now"

"im not gonna die eth i just am really tired"

"no y/n/n please don't go please"

you then go still, making ethan sob even harder

he cradles your body close to him, burying his head in your hair. ethan is still in shock that you're gone

he hates quinn right now and knows that he's going to give her a long and painful death for killing the love of his life.

you had your whole life ahead of you, only 19 and now dead because of his bitch sister.

he remembers that some of the last things you had told him was that you two were going to get through this whole ghostface thing but now without you, ethan just doesn't know what to do with his life

taglist ♥︎ - @xyzstar, @ourloveisgod23, @dizscreams, @kaesworldxx, @bhk1234uwu, @nonniesworld, @athenalive, @lanaslittletwinkie, @beccajoestar

if your name is crossed out it's bc it wouldn't let me tag you

a/n ♥︎ - ok i have no clue if this is shitty or not but all i know is that i was listening to love by lana del rey while writing this and i actually started crying, anyways i hope you enjoyed!

#ethan landry #ethan landry x reader #ethan landry x you #ethan landry x fem!reader #ethan landry angst #jack champion #jack champion x reader #jack champion x you #jack champion x y/n #jack champion angst #hahhahhahaha this is kinda shitty

127 notes · View notes

suikunishizu · 3 months

Text

Too much..

✦Im bad at telling and writing stories! Im sorry ><

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ ..·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ ..·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ ..·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ ..·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩

You were bored, scrolling through your phone and you came across a website. It seems fishy.. but you clicked it. It was a chatting website. You talk to strangers online. You pressed join.

The person texted "Greetings", the person's username was RussianRat , you guessed he was russian and a rat??

You replied "Heya"

"How are you?" he replied.

"Im' doing fine ig.."

"I guess? Whats the matter?"

"My family just went put to a vacation and they left me in the house.. and they posted in their feed 'Bonding with my family'"

"Hm.. Thats not right"

"Well im used to it so it doesnt matter"

"Still.. you are part of the family that they created. You should be one of them. I suppose their not right in the head and they are a sinner"

"I like how you speak.."

"Well thank you."

"I've go to go now.. chat you later RussianRat"

"Talk to you later Любовь"

You downloaded the app and saved his info. After that you went downstairs and cooked yourself a nice meal and took a warm bath. Your family.. how do i say this again.. right your a mistake. Your parents did it and forgot protection and there came you. So they hated you despised you. You were a mistake, to them your a burden. Another mouth to feed for them. But they couldnt send you away to an orphanage cause a lot of people knew they had you. What would people think of them?.. Scrolling through your phone you've found another website.. a dark website.. (I'll seperate this story to another blog dw).. you decided to check it later.. so you listened to music till you fell asleep.

....

You woke up at 2 am.. it was automatically.. you never had the reason to wake up that time but your body always wakes up at that time... You went downstairs and drank water.. and back up to your bedroom. You cant sleep.. so you turned on your phone and chatted 'RussianRat'.

"Hello are you awake?"

"Yes i am. What are you doing awake so early?"

"Well.. my body automatically wakes up this time.."

"I see.. i suppose you cant sleep?"

"Good guess!!"

"Can i do anything to help you then?"

You never experienced love before..but you hold affection for his words.. you dont know why but even if its just words your stomach twist in a good way.. you just met him..

"Hello?"

"Oh sorry i zoned out"

"Thats alright.."

A bunch of exchanging words to eachother.. the affection grew.. and grew.. you guys have been chatting for a month now..

"RussianRat"

"Yes Дорогой?"

"Whats your name?"

"Fyodor."

"So you really are russian.. Im Y/N"

"Beautiful name."

"Thank you"

Your family came back a week ago.. your days was always filled with mean words 'Your so useless!', 'I shouldnt have given birth to you!', 'All you give me is stress and anxiety!','You should kill yourself!', and many more. You were used to it. Is this why you hold affection for Fyodor's words? is that it? Maybe. Words hold a large affect on you. Cause words from your family hurted you.. and Fyodor's words.. his.. words.. were.. you feel.. loved by his words.. even if its only "Have you slept well?" and "Have you eaten breakfast yet?" you feel loved..

You always vented to him.. telling him about your troubles and your day. He always comforted you to the point it was his hobby and yours. But you always felt like you were a bother to him. Well. you are a stranger he met online. Sometimes you type messages like "I707370U" (ILOVEYOU) and it always lifts the burden on your shoulder.. hoping he wouldnt know what it means. But. Its Fyodor he got that 200 IQ. And you always giggled at his words and when he say the foreign text he sends you.. you always blushed and you squeal everytime.

You always texted eachother everyday. But your family always shuts the wifi down at night and they dont let you connect you use internet at daytime. You want to meet Fyodor. But your scared to ask. The affection that grew was so strong that you cut yourself to ease the eagerness on your stomach everytime you two chat. But until this day.

"Дорогой" He chatted.

"Hello Fedya!! How are you??"

You chat more livelier now.

"Im alright but im worried bout you.."

"Oh?? why is that?"

"Your cutting yourself arent you?"

What.. wait.. how.. did he know?

"What?? I dont do that!"

"Stop lying"

"...How did you know?"

"Thats a secret... Now. why do you do it?"

"Thats my secret.."

Your mind going hazy.. you feel your about to explode. You dont know why!

"I love you Fedya"

"Дорогой"

"I dont know what your saying or why am i like this.. i dont like it... cause everytime i talk to you my stomach twist! Stop seducing me! Are you a wizard?? I love you so much to the point it becomes unbearable! That i had to do something about it! And i know i never had the chance to you because im just a stranger online and you probably like someone else that you know in real life!

You sent the message.. youll regret this later.. your conversation.. this friendship might end.. or never will be the same.. or even both. You felt tears as you were waiting for is response.

"Your adorable my Дорогой"

Your surprised.

"..?"

"Dont worry about it much dear. Ill talk to you later. Goodnight my love"

'My love?' You blushed giggling kicking at the message.. but.. he didnt comfort you as he used to.. that was strange.. He said goodnight so immediately slept.

You woke up at 2 am again.. you rub your eyes.. and sat..

You hear a knock at your window.. 'what?' You panicked and grabbed a chair.

"Whos there..?"

You opened the curtain.. there was nothing.. you sighed and put down the chair.. 'its probably a bird or something..'

You sat at the edge of your bed then you felt the bed sank behind you. You immediately turned around and saw.. Fyodor?

You blushed and he pull you downed on the bed.

"Good evening Дорогой"

"F-Fyodor?????"

"Yes its me Дорогой"

"H-how.. why- what??"

"Shh.. do you feel better now?"

"Of course.."

This felt like a dream come true.. so you cant help it but just hug him., this felt too good to be true so you want to cherish the moment.

"Everything will be alright now.. Дорогой"

"I wish this is real.. i love you Fedya"

"This is real"

"Yeah ill believe it after i wake up in the morning and see you wrapped your arms around me"

"Alright"

He hugged you and kissed your forehead.. this was.. really too good to be true!

"Goodnight my love"

....

You woke up 6 am.. Fyodor wasnt in your bed.. your dissapointed and sad.. stupid dream.. then you heard a knock.. you opened the door and you saw Fyodor.. you smiled brightly and hugged him..

"Please tell me this isnt a dream!"

"Good morning my love.. and this is not a dream."

You pinched yourself.

"ouch! this isnt really a dream!! I love you so much!!!!!!!"

"I love you too"

You felt a cold liquid on his shirt.. it.. was blood?

"Fedya! What happened your bleeding!"

"Dont worry.. it isnt my blood and im not hurt.."

He said as he kissed the crown of your head.

"Whos blood is it??"

"Your family."

..Surprisingly.. you felt nothing..

"Oh.."

You only hugged him tighter.

"Lets get.. you cleaned.."

"Hm.. After this.. shall we leave?"

He brushed his fingers along your cheek.

"Okay.."

You smiled.

"I love you Дорогой"

"I love you too.. too much.."

HIII!! As i said in my previous blog.. this is one of my irl stories!!! except for the killing part!! Sorry if its not the accurate Fyodor!

Дорогой = Darling

#fyodor dostoyevsky bsd #fyodor bsd #fyodor x reader #meow #me irl

20 notes · View notes

jennilah · 17 days

Note

I think i started to follow you bc of tiny!cas, like eons ago, let me tell you seeing you get into different fandoms over the years has been a delight.

I remember seeing post of you going like 'hey these slasher film kinda go hard' and look at you know.

I mean this in the best way possible, I feel i've been watching a house plant grow, every now and then catching my attention and being amazed by the changes

omg thats such a sweet way of describing my... well happy autism awareness day everyone, its a nice way of describing the way i naturally transition through my Special Interests lmfao

actually, for the holiday, let me infodump about this very aspect of my brain to anyone who isnt aware how this works for me. (also every autistic person is different, so this is just how this symptom manifests in me)

ill say "phases" to simplify, though thats an unfair word because it implies im "over" my past phases. 99% of my past phases are pretty much there for life, but in the back of my mind. (So long as I didnt have a "bad breakup" with it for some reason, which is rare but happens) The ability to become a raving lunatic about it is dormant until someone asks the right question.

There can only be one interest (sometimes 2, with one being the less dominant one) at the forefront of my brain at a time, though. that defines the "phase".

so for example, my recent Halloween phase is "over" and I am 100% fully into Saw now, but I still absolutely love Halloween and Michael and Jason and all those guys. as evident by me still happily sharing gifsets and art and buying merch etc if it tickles my fancy. They're just hanging out in the background of my mental display case.

yea whoever follows my tumblr for a very long time has watched it happen in realtime. the transition between interests. i know for a fact which phase I started this blog on. if you're here from the beginning, youve seen, in order:

-Durarara!! -Deus Ex -Supernatural -Godzilla -Detroit: Become Human -There was like a few weeks where it was HLVRAI -And then it was plants. There was a year-long stretch with no Special Interest and I was latching onto odd things (and I was very inactive here) -Halloween & Friday the 13th -and now, Saw

I have many other things I love, but they don't clamp around my brain in quite the same extreme way.

my phases can last any amount of time, anywhere from a few short intense months to 5+ years, its completely random, completely unpredictable. even the interest itself is impossible to predict. its not something i choose, its something that happens to me.

sometimes i avoid watching things for a long time because im still very emotionally attached to my current phase and im genuinely afraid the shiny new thing will replace it. all art or fic ideas for the previous phase? theyll be abandoned. all I will want to create will be related to the new thing. (though I will sometimes draw it anyway, like digging up old toys to play with once in a while. The likelihood just drops considerably)

which is why right now i pretty much put a pause on the other franchises I plan on watching. I'm genuinely gripping onto Saw like someone is tryin to take it from me.

and then sometimes im like "haha yeah right. ill be fine. ill eat my shoe if my brain latches to this" and then put on the movie and by the credits roll im a new person (yes thats what happened with Saw. I really had no idea.)

this is also why im terrified of even just "checking out" things that have, like, a toxic fanbase or something, because i cant stop a new phase from happening if it does. and its really hard to keep it to myself, fuck

(do u know how mad i was when i realized i was attaching to hoffman the evil dirty cop??? i was so scared of drawing him, dudes. but thankfully everyones been cool abt it and we're all very aware of his awfulness & we have fun w it)

and every time my brain changes and i do get obsessed with some new thing, i get really scared and worried and hope I dont bother everyone who followed me for something else :(((( and yet, every time, im absolutely floored by how many people choose to tolerate my newest nonsense and stick around anyway

anyway ive lost the plot of what point i was making here OH YEAH thank you!

tl;dr: that would be the autism! thank you, it WILL happen again! that is a threat! 🥰

#jennilargh #jenna answers

12 notes · View notes