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#the students are the only good thing about this place
i4oba · 3 days
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nct dream as… !%# types of dates .. 🥣⋆☄︎. *. ⋆
[non-idol ver.! just so you know eheh]
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✰ MARK — drive-in theater
it honestly came to mind pretty randomly, as you two got back from your last exam of the semester, driving mindlessly for about two hours — not because you didn’t know what you want to do, but because you two simply just enjoyed doing nothing??? but so many things at the same???
just listening to the mixtape you made for mark, singing so loud everyone could hear since the windows were rolled down too… you felt a sense of freedom? some kind of… relief from the burdens??? it was a pretty hectic exam season you two had to endure and since it was finally over.. you couldn’t keep your excitement low
looking at each other with love and adoration, exhaustion vanishing in the company of the other one — it honestly should be studied? how easy it is for you two to affect the other???
you stumbled upon the drive-in theater by accident, it wasn’t planned or anything, you just wanted to simply spend your night at mark’s place and call it a day, watch a movie on his laptop while cuddling and stuff
but when you spotted the sign you couldn’t help but exclaim, getting all excited over it, even slapping mark’s upper arm… poor boy winced and just said “hey, no need to kill the driver”
you didn’t even need to convince him honestly, he immediately agreed and there you were… not knowing what was actually screening, blindly finding a good spot you two can park and enjoy the movie
it would’ve slapped if it was some kind of slasher horror from the 80s… but it was casablanca
WHICH IS SO CLICHÉ I KNOW BUT it makes So much sense and honestly, it’s such a big game changer to see it like that. it’s like an opportunity you shouldn’t miss
mark got some popcorn and something to drink, to make the whole atmosphere even more “vibey”, as he said, and you two just.. turned off your minds and watch the movie
discussing it and everything, like FELLAS, that’s the right experience! that’s how you watch a movie!!! YOU GOTTA ANALYZE THE SHIT OUT OF IT!!!!!!! ahah
in the end, when almost everyome drove away from the theater, leaving you two here with like.. only 3 other cars, mark gave a kiss on your lips, as a way of celebrating it all. it was for a fleeting moment only, yet it was so sweet and full of emotions
it was a reward, of some sort.
✰ RENJUN — museum date
there was this new exhibition at the local fine arts museum so… it wasn’t even a question that you two would literally RUN (and get a good use of the student discount ahah, it’s a lifesaver!)
casually choosing some elegant clothes which, of course, had to be matching to a certain extent – people HAVE TO see that you guys are together, plus it would look so good on the pictures
you expected lot more of people since it was the first week of the grand opening but it wasn’t that crowded. Which is a good thing honestly, you hate it when it’s sooo full you cannot even move properly
it was an exhibition of some impressionist works by some of the most renowed painters, it was a must to not only look the best, but to prepare yourself for a long day of strolling around
you usually spend tons of time in museums anyways, but this also as part of a date??? the security would have to kick you out asap.. ahah
renjun immediately reached for your hands to hold, while walking around, looking at the beautiful paintings, talking about whatever came to mind – not just about art itself, topics changed so fast you couldn’t even realize it by the time it did
being in art school meant that renjun can sometimes tell you little fun facts and tips&tricks he had learnt in uni
sometimes it amazes how well informed he is and how he knows so many know-hows.. not like you weren’t aware, you absolutely knew he’s smart AND TALENTED, but still ahah
after a good… 3 hours or so? you two decided to end the date with a quick stop at the museum shop :DDD it’s a must honestly, you gotta buy every magnet and postcard you can… especially of such beautiful paintings???!!! you would be stupid if you left without Anything
so you two bought tons of stuff… even some things you can exchange, as if they were gifts for one another :,) ahhh…
you just have to print out that picture of you two, taken in front of that big painting of mesmerizing flowers: renjun kissing you softly, hands on your waist, eyes closed
✰ JENO — stargazing
you had been planning this for literal days before… you know, getting everything together, like those cool ass lamps in a jar bottle with the led stuff, blankets you bought from a nearby art shop?? which sold basically everything??? ahah
drinks and snacks too… you were honestly So Ready to go stargazing! :D
you were supposed to go to that rather tiny park of the town which is mostly empty. that’s why you decided on going there, avoid people and stuff, just the two of you, looking at the constellations >:( honestly it’s so romantic it makes me Cringe (i crave it)
but in the end, you two decided to stay at yours instead, since your parents left for the weekend anyways, which is just a bonus: it’s the two of you in the backyard with the vast sky full of stars
idyllic??? romantic??? adorable and unforgettable??????
All of the above
at first, you two just sat down on the swing bed your father recently bought at a random flea market he religiously visited every weekend :,)
but then, to use the blanket you brought outside (what a tiresome task ahah), you two laid down on the ground instead
the first constellation you spotted was the big dipper, exclaiming when you noticed it on the sky, gently shoving jeno’s shoulder, who was rather nonchalant at first
he then, of course matched your energy, and got super super excited, especially after noticing the ursa major :D he felt like he accomplished his life goal or something ahah (hes so stupid but in a cute way)
what the cherry on top was is his hands, reaching for yours, fingers intertwining, as your heart warmed up – you looked at him, his beautiful face, and noticed that adorable eyesmile of his
life felt good. you felt at home
✰ HAECHAN — restaurant hop
he fucking hates cooking lmfao he’s all like “yo girl i don’t think we should let Me get near that oven… we might burn up the whole house IJBOL” (he would definitely use ijbol irl)
so you were like…
hyuck, you literally don’t even have to come to kitchen bro, i will cook… which happens most of the times when you decide to stay at home for dates
but this day!!! to spare you from the tiring task of cooking!!!!!!!! he said that you guys should try out restaurant hopping
you were confused as hell honestly, like wdym you want that, aren’t you a picky mf lmfao
but he said that he’s feeling adventurous and is pretty much lazy to go hiking or anything that a sane person would go for
and he felt hungry so it was like the best choice in his eyes – you were sick of spending most of your nights at his (shared…) apartment so you agreed after like… 5 secs of persuading
you wanted to plan out where you should go and maybe book a table at some restaurant but he was all like “honey, we should be spontaneous, go with the flow…”, so you did???? Ahah
the first restaurant was not even a restaurant, it was just the first street food stall you two stumbled upon, getting something for the both of you
you didn’t want to feel full so early so you chose something light (unlike hyuck who was sure he was “alright” but after like the second stop, he was dying because his stomach was hurting “So Badly”)
you ended the restaurant hop with a donut at one of the bakeries you usually go to – you know, to finish it off with something familiar??? now lemme just say, it was chaotic, because haechan could BARELY finish it and made it your problem, whining like a little girl after every bite
like you told him not to get the biggest, sweetest and greasiest one but he was sooo sure in himself, he said he’s got an extra stomach for desserts
well… was he wrong…….
you spent 1.5 hours there!!!!!! he took so much time LMFAOXJAJX they were closing already and he still hadn’t finished
so you tried to rush him and stuff but he turned his princess mode on ahah
but at least, on the way back to his place, he bought you tulips :) it was such a sweet gesture <3
not as sweet as his donut was…… (he almost threw up the next day cause he was feeling nauseous from the food)
✰ JAEMIN — picnic date
jaemin was so excited :( he literally couldn’t stop talking about it like.. that’s right dude!!!!!! we’re going on a date!!!!!! A PICNIC DATE!!!!!
he would literally live in the kitchen before the occasion so that he can cook&bake tons of things for you to eat :) he’s so… he’s so malewife
all you’re left to deal with is bringing the basket and checkered blanket, every other things are settled! they are in his hands, under his control :D
you two went to the park which is right next to the lake – you wanted to see swans while talking about anything and everything that came to mind (he literally compared your beauty to that of a swan… which made you almost tear up like BOY YOU DID NOT… argghhh)
it was a must to start it off with the most basic and cliché thing of everything: the chocolate covered strawberries, feeding each other all lovey-dovey, tooth rottingly sweet and stuff
everyone was possibly like “okay lemme just kms” when they spotted you two, all up on each other, legs all tangled together, stealing kisses from the other, while giggling so loudly
it was SOO so idyllic, almost like you two escaped from a romance movie, or a painting. it felt… perfect, in a way?
birds singing, the sun shining gently on your skin, while you could hear the laughter of the children running around, clouds in animal shapes
then the sun slowly setting, pinkish hues taking up the sky above, everything becoming quiet as time passes by
he hugs you tightly. tighter than ever, perhaps
✰ CHENLE — karaoke
if two weeks pass by without you and chenle going to a karaoke… Most probably it’s because you broke up or something
like girl ain’t no way you WON’T go to karaoke dates… nuh huh, impossible to even think of that ??? CHENLE, out of all people
that’s the least believable thing like i promise you!
like saturday night are for the gir- KARAOKE!!!!! :P that’s how it always goes, getting ready, putting on some casual clothes, maybe eating something quick before that, and then spending the entire time singing your lungs out
you don’t even have energy by the end of it, like it… seems impossible to even crawl back home :,)
but honestly it’s all worth it, comparing your score and stuff, seeing which one of you sings better
sometimes you just open instagram and do lives too, so that your followers can pick who they liked more
(it’s always chenle’s acc though like SO MANY people follows him, he’s like a celebrity… ahah!)
haechan always comes to watch and roasts the both of you, especially when it can be seen that chenle kisses you here and there
he types “EWWWW GET A ROOM FREAKS” and thinks he’s hilarious lmfao
you always start the date with a quick and energetic song, one that boost your energy up easily and then… honestly it depends on your mood
sometimes you gotta be in your moods and sing romantic ballads to each other, as if it’s a serenade
but then again, moods swing so quickly and you can end up in a rap battle too
you would totally eat him up tbh… and he knows it so well
he finishes the date off with the most cheesiest, lovely romantic song ever… like a confession said yet again, for the hundreth time
✰ JISUNG — amusement park
it wasn’t his idea honestly
it was all you coming up with it, because there was that one roller coaster you’d always been scared to go on
and since you haven’t visited ever since you had jisung… you thought MAYBEEEE (just maybe) it would be better with him
you can at least hold onto him and stuff
he wanted to eat before the ride though… you did not let him, of course, since you didn’t want him to throw up on you AHAH
but like, why did he came there RAVENOUS? duh … you’re gonna say goodbye to your guts on the ride girl what did you expect
but you know, the ride wasn’t even the part you enjoyed the most – it was good, of course, just not that… outstanding? i guess? it was alright… especially because you could hold jisung’s hand so tightly :,) it was honestly so adorable
they should’ve taken pictures of you like you’re sure you would’ve put it on the fridge or something
but after that, you went to the gift shop, to get those silly headbands!!!!! you got one that resembled a cat, and jisung got one with a hamster >:( it was adorbs
you two looked like those IT couples that you can always see in instagram, you know, holding hands, taking silly candid pictures and then eating sooo much food
FINALLY!!! thought jisung probably ahah you got so many sweets it was like you could feel your tooth decaying lmfao
at the end of the day, you two decided to try out the freshly opened photo booth which had been going viral for weeks
it was… an experience to say the least :,) but the pictures came out prettier than ever!!!! except for the one where jisung sneezed and you got all scared because he was Loud loud ahah
but the compensation was a fleeting kiss on your cheek! which was also captured on one of the pictures :)
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dyaz-stories · 3 days
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you know my tongue is a weapon || gojo satoru x reader
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synopsis: Shoko suggests a study night, but Gojo's bored and he doesn't want to study. So, instead, he offers to play a game, when all the others have left to get some food: every time he gets an answer right, he gets a kiss.
As you soon find out, Gojo can be very good at studying, as long as he gets something out of it.
word count: 3.8k
genre: college!AU, mostly fluff i think
cw: kissing, making out, semi-public kissing, unresolved sexual tension, reader is insecure and is therefore an unreliable narrator, dry humping ig, fem reader (the word girl is used once)
a/n: first time writing for jujutsu and for gojo! any feedback is appreciated, and i hope you enjoy yourselves :)
soundtrack
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Exam season is never a fun time to be on campus. Stress fills the air, the hallways, the always full libraries, even the coffee shops where people usually meet to relax between two classes. It’s the only conversation subject between sleep-deprived students, looming over their head threateningly at any time of the day and night. It’s stifling, a weight on their chest that never quite wears off.
As for you, well, you’re doing alright.
Oh, for sure, it’s a lot of work, and you’re not thrilled about it by any stretch of the imagination, but academia is your thing, so you don’t find it nearly as crushing as others do. You’re more terrified of the time period that comes afterwards, while you’re waiting for the results like Judgement day.
In the meantime, you’ve given up on trying to find a spot to study in the library, and you’ve been doing most of it in your small student room. You haven’t stepped outside in days when Shoko texts you to suggest a study night. You suspect that she hasn’t started working and intends to cram, but you take her up on the offer nonetheless.
You show up at her place right on time — you always are — with your notes and some snacks. You wait quietly after knocking, trying to make sense of the chatter you hear on the other side of the door. She had mentioned she would ask a few other people if they wanted to join, which you had assumed would be fine, but faced with the reality of it now you can feel a lump growing in your throat. Academia might be easy for you, but people… aren’t.
When the door opens to reveal Gojo Satoru, piercing blue eyes meeting yours through white locks of hair that he pushes out of his face a second later, you fully consider turning around and leaving.
“You made it,” he says, shooting you a wide grin.
“Hi,” you squeak in reply.
Gojo is a… friend. Ish. Kinda. You think. Well, he’s a friend of Shoko’s, anyway, so the two of you have hung out, socially, before. Up until last summer, you assumed he didn’t even know your name.
“Thank God you’re here,” Shoko says, appearing from behind him to grab your hand. “No one here wants to work. We need to whip these imbeciles into shape or something.”
“I’m working,” Nanami sighs from the table in the living room, where he’s sitting alone.
“I was just waiting for everyone to be here, Shoko,” Geto says, his voice soft and even, as he approaches the table.
You set your bag down, giving Nanami an sympathetic smile, and he pushes his glasses higher on his nose. When he nods at you, you’re pretty sure it’s a silent way of saying ‘thank you for not leaving me alone with them’.
“What are you guys starting with?” you ask, pulling some books out of your bag.
Everyone here has different majors, but with some classes in common. You’re not sure how efficient this enterprise is going to be, if you’re completely honest, but as Gojo lets himself fall on a chair with a dramatic sigh, you suppose it can’t be worse than if he was left to his own devices.
“I’m doing literature, algebra and physics tonight!” Haibara announces, perhaps a tad too enthusiastic. You don’t want to crush his hopes and dreams, but—
“You’re never going to get through all that in one night,” Nanami says with a frown.
“Don’t listen to him”, Gojo intervenes, “you can do anything you set your mind to.”
There are stars in Haibara’s eyes when he looks at him, but you notice the glances Gojo is stealing at Nanami, and the way his smile widens when Nanami grits his teeth in annoyance. You bite your lip so you don’t let out a chuckle.
“Do you want to start with literature with me?” you offer. “Nanami, you’ll have to handle algebra because I’m not taking any algebra classes this semester.”
The corner of Nanami’s lips curves to form a smile.
“It’s good that someone here is taking this seriously.”
“Ugh,” Gojo mutters. “Fine. Hey, Suguru, do you know what tests I have next week?”
Nanami buries his head in his hands with a pained groan, and you laugh again, lump gone from your throat now, as you move your chair to come sit next to Haibara. Gojo’s eyes follow your movement silently. When you lean over the same textbook as Haibara, shoulders brushing against his as you push a lock of hair behind your ear, his expression turns thoughtful. It’s only when Geto drops a book in front of him that he snaps out of it.
“Are you sure you don’t want to do shots instead?” he asks, tone sour.
“Man, don’t tempt me,” Shoko whines as she sits down as well. “The shots will have to wait.”
Truly, Gojo thinks, sadder words have never been spoken.
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Nanami calls it quits right before 10 pm. He’s tried to leave a few times by then, usually because of one of Gojo’s quips, but Shoko’s managed to keep him around until then. It doesn’t help how delighted Gojo gets by his reactions, and you can’t blame him for abandoning you. You don’t doubt for a second that he would have been much more productive without everyone else around.
“If they pass their exams, we should give ourselves all the credit for that,” he comments at your intention, right before walking out the door. “Good luck with them.”
Then he’s gone, before Gojo can start to protest about why he is not getting any encouragements, even though he’s suffering so much, and everyone is mean, and nothing about this is fun, and—
Haibara, despite his best intentions, falls asleep on the couch less than thirty minutes later. It was just supposed to be quick nap, but by midnight he’s still down, and you can’t bring yourself to wake him up. Plus it’s not like you were making a lot of progress with him anyway, so he just might be better off sleeping.
It’s not long after that that Shoko starts to get real antsy. So far, she has kept on track despite Gojo’s attempts at distracting her, but you can tell she is starting to get incredibly bored. Somehow, that doesn’t seem to be Gojo’s case, even if the way his leg bounces underneath his chair tells you he’s itching to do anything other than sit here doing nothing.
“Fuck it,” Shoko says, finally giving up. “I’m going to get something to eat.”
Geto frowns.
“Now? Alone?”
“As if anything would happen to her,” Gojo says, spinning a pen between his fingers. “She’ll be the scariest person out there.”
Geto rolls his eyes.
“I’ll come with you,” he tells Shoko, and she shrugs. “Do you want to come too, Satoru?”
Gojo lets himself fall down on his chair, looking at Geto with his head hanging behind the back of the chair.
“Nah,” he says after a few seconds of intense deliberation. “Can’t abandon the teacher here.”
You feel your face heating up.
“Oh, I mean, I’m sure I’ll be fine. If you want to go, you should—”
“It’s fine,” he handwaves your protests away. “I’ll finally get some work done without Shoko here to constantly distract me with—”
He bursts out laughing when Shoko throws her pen at him.
“We’ll be right back,” she announces, standing up. “You,” she points at Gojo, “play nice. And you,” she gives you a severe look, “don’t hesitate to hit him. I’m not joking.”
She leaves the room, escorted by Geto. Haibara doesn’t even stir when the door slams.
“Alright,” Gojo says, not wasting a second to reach for your chair so he can pull you closer to him, “it’s my turn to get my own personal tutor.” His fingers brush against your leg as he pulls you in, and you know, from how his eyes seem to drink in everything about you, that he doesn’t miss your quiet gasp nor the way your breath quickens. You’ve noticed this before, too. If he likes annoying Nanami, he seems to delight in your reactions at least as much — though he tries to make you laugh or to fluster you rather than piss you off.
“Um,” you say, with the eloquence that characterizes you around him, “what do you need help with?”
He tilts his head to the side as he studies you. You find him breathtaking, you always do, but you think you’ve gotten better at hiding it, so even if it feels like he’s looking right into your soul, you give him an easy smile.
Somehow, he is the one who ends up averting his eyes.
“How about philosophy?”
Right, the two of you share that one class on the history of ideas.
“Sure,” you say, already grabbing a book and thumbing through it. “I’ve taken quite a few notes for that class, actually, I can give them to you if you—”
“That’s boring,” he interrupts you. “We should do something else.”
You put down your book, intrigued, and something twists in your stomach when you see the look he’s giving you. He’s like a cat with a mouse, with exactly the same hunger in his eyes.
“What—” you clear your throat when your voice cracks. “What are you suggesting?”
“Well,” he leans forward, resting his elbow on the table and putting his chin in his palm, “I need an incentive to work, you know?”
You swallow. Sure.
“So how ‘bout I get a kiss for every right answer I give you?”
And you almost choke on air.
“What?” you manage to croak. Blood is rushing to your face, and it feels like your brain is short-circuiting. Your heart’s beating faster, hammering in your chest, and you feel your palms grow sweaty.
“C’mon,” he teases, reaching out to pull on a lock of your hair and twirl it around his finger, and you know, you know, he knows he’s got you right where he wants to, “help me study.”
“Gojo—”
“Satoru,” he all but purrs.
“Satoru,” you say, “what are you doing?”
“What do you mean?” he blinks innocently. “Just trying to find a fun way to study.”
You examine him carefully, try to figure out what, exactly, is going on behind these beautiful eyes of his. You’ve had— moments, with him. He fell asleep on your shoulder in the car once. He held your hand through a busy festival, teasing you about not wanting you to get lost, and later helped you get on his shoulders so you’d get a better view of the stage. The one time you agreed to accompany Shoko to the club, you remember his hands on your hips, his breath against your ear, the ghost of his lips to your neck. But nothing actually happened between the two of you. You’d told yourself that it was all a distraction for him, that he didn’t want more.
This isn’t exactly confirmation. You don’t doubt that it’s all in good fun still, and knowing you, and how hard you tend to fall, you should walk away while you have the chance.
But you really, really want to kiss him. Want to know what it would feel like to taste his lips, to have his body pressed against yours, to feel his hands all over you.
You always take the smart decision. This is not the smart decision. But…
“What if you get it wrong?” you ask.
Satoru blinks.
“You can, uh, spray me with a water bottle?”
You let out a brief laugh.
“Isn’t that a dog thing? That feels unethical, Satoru.”
He preens at your use of his name.
“You should take your chance,” he drawls. “Shoko says it’s really cathartic.”
You’re not sure you need catharsis, but you feel a little lighter now. It’s all a joke to him, clearly, and from what you’ve seen in the past couple of hours, he hasn’t seriously studied once. He’s not going to get the answers right. You don’t think he’s even trying to.
“Fine,” you say with a playful roll of your eyes, reaching out for a water bottle and positioning your chair so you’re facing him. “Who came up with the notion of civil disobed—"
“Thoreau, 1848, but the essay was republished with that name in 1866.”
You stare. Gojo gives you a lazy smile.
“Now where’s my kiss?”
“Um,” you say. You feel incredibly awkward now. He’s leaning back against his chair, with eyes that have not left you once since he’s suggested that idea. You— have to move, now, don’t you?
Very slowly, very hesitantly, you push yourself to your feet. Satoru doesn’t move at all, and you don’t know if it relieves you or stresses you out even more. The position is quite uncomfortable, too, with you standing and him sitting down. You don’t know that you’ve ever towered over him like that. Gingerly, you put a hand on his shoulder, and then you’re leaning over him, and then you’re kissing him, and then you’re moving away as fast as you can. This was just a peck, really, a press of your lips to his that lasted a second, tops, and that you’re already trying to forget about.
You’re not a teenager anymore, and you know this shouldn’t be getting to you that much, but it’s— it’s Satoru Gojo. You’ve worked very, very hard not to think of him like that, because you didn’t want to let yourself get hurt. And now, you’ve let yourself be dragged into this so easily? Ugh. You wish you could slap yourself.
“Okay,” you say, voice more high-pitched than you’d like, but still understandable, which you’re grateful for. “Next, um, can you explain what philosopher kings are?”
Surely—
“Of course,” Satoru pretty much sing-songs. “Plato thought that cities should be ruled by trained philosophers, because only a philosopher would know and act for the good of a city.” There’s a brief pause, before he adds, “Aristotle thought that was bullshit, though. For the record.”
And then he waits. You narrow your eyes at him.
“When did you study for that?”
“I never study,” he answers lightly.
Instead of standing up this time, you scoot your chair closer to him, and you lean forward. Satoru chuckles, but humors you — even if the temptation of leaning further back to make you come to him, because you’re just adorable when you’re flustered, is great. This time, when you kiss him, though, he presses forward before you can move away, his nose brushing against your cheek as he chases after you. And oh, what a sight you are after that, wide eyed, lips parted, hands tightening on your notes.
“Next?” he asks.
“Right,” you say. You’re— not sure what’s happening here, to be quite honest. Should you stop this? You— don’t think you want to, but you’re also not sure what this charade is all about. “Um. Spinoza thought that free will—”
“—could only be reached through knowledge, and that most people never obtained it.”
Okay.
“Aren’t you supposed to be a physics major?”
He raises an eyebrow, looking genuinely amused.
“Determinism’s a pretty big deal in science, actually, but let’s not change the subject here.”
You bite your lower lip, and his eyes track the movement like he’s starving for you.
You’re feeling hot all over, anticipation burning inside of you, and this time, you can’t pretend that he hasn’t done this on purpose. That he wanted to kiss you. You can’t quite reconcile the way you see yourself with that thought — how could Gojo Satoru want you, of all people? — but you find that it doesn’t matter.
You lean towards him once more, and this time, you let yourself kiss him. Really kiss him. You press your lips to his, soft at first, but when you don’t move away immediately, you feel him pressing against you, one hand coming to cup your cheek. His teeth pull at your bottom lip, and you let out a involuntary gasp. He doesn’t waste the opportunity to slide his tongue inside your mouth, and you keep inching closer to him, hands coming to his shoulders for support. You can feel yourself melt into him, and you curse your common sense when it leads you to break away from the kiss.
It doesn’t deter Satoru, though, because as you do, his hand slides under your knee, and next thing you know, he’s pulled you into his lap. His face is deliciously flushed, pink hue under the pale skin. He looks up at you, long fingers tightening around your thighs.
“We should waste less time like that,” he says.
Shoko likes to say he’s insufferable, and you can see why. Everything all seems to come so easy to him, and you’re defenseless against the way your heart races. When his eyes are on you, it feels like you’re the only person in the world. You’re not usually the type to indulge in that idea, but, ah, what’s the harm, as long as you know how to come back to earth later on?
You shake your head as you take him in.
“How are you even doing that?” you ask, mildly peeved.
“Haven’t you heard?” he grins widely. “I’m a genius.”
You roll your eyes at him. You’ve heard about that, of course, about how he maintains stellar grades without breaking a sweat. You just hadn’t seen that in application until now. In class, he’s usually asleep, or taking great joy in bothering the teacher. You’ve never seen him try to get something.
“Well, where’s my question?”
You sigh, putting your arms around his neck. You left your notes on the table, meaning that you might be less prepared than he is, actually.
“Descartes famously said—”
“Cogito ergo sum. C’mon, rational doubt is at the heart of science. I’m starting to think you’re just trying to kiss me.”
You do want to kiss him, but you have the self-control to shrug.
“Well, if you don’t want to—”
His mouth is on yours before you can think of how to end that sentence. He kisses you hungrily, hands gripping your hips as he tries to pulls you closer to him. Your chest presses into his, and you tighten your hold around him, fingers running through his hair. He grunts when you pull on it slightly, tilts his head back a little more to give you better access to his mouth, and when his tongue brushes against yours once more, you can’t help but to rock your hips against his. The friction makes you gasp into his mouth, and one of your hands falls down to his shoulder, fisting his shirt as you try to find better support.
“Fuck,“ you hear him mumble underneath you, right as you feel him grow hard. He pushes up against you. His fingers dig into your skin, one hand slipping under your shirt to run over your skin, leaving a trail of fire behind. It moves higher, brushing against your bra.
Against your better judgement, your hands travel down his body, tracing over his muscles. You feel him twitch under you, and when you roll your hips once more, with much more intent than the first time, he groans.
“Satoru,” you whisper, though even you don’t know if it’s a plea for him to stop or to keep going.
His eyes widen, and you feel him lift you up easily, pushing you onto the table. You lean back slightly, resting your weight on one hand. He’s red all over now, from his ears to his neck. His pupils are wide, his lips swollen, his hair messy. He looks like sin.
You don’t want to think about what you look like.
“C’mon,” he says. “Last question.”
“Haibara’s in the living room,” you point out. Even you know where this is leading.
“He’s dead asleep,” he merely shrugs. He’s mesmerizing, but you note that the glimmer of amusement that always dances in his eyes. This feels— serious.
“Um,” you say, licking your lips and watching how he bites his as his grip on your waist tightens once more — like he’s holding himself back. “Confucius—”
And then, the front door opens.
Gojo clicks his tongue and reluctantly steps back as you jump down from the table, beelining for the bathroom — you know that kiss is written all over your face.
You glare at yourself in the mirror. Your body’s still tingling, and you’re aching with want, now that release has been denied to you, but you know better. You’re supposed to know better. You take a few seconds to comb through your hair with your hands, and when it no longer looks like someone’s, well, kissed you senseless, you cautiously step back outside.
“We got you some fuel,” Shoko announces loudly, before getting shushes by Geto. He points in Haibara’s direction, who’s started snoring slightly.
“Thank you so much,” you say sweetly. “I’ll— Why are you wet?”
Gojo deadpans as he looks at you but, well, there’s water dripping from his hair, down his chin, and onto the shirt your hands were fisted in just a few minutes earlier, so, you think the question is valid.
“He was splashing water on his face when we got here,” Geto supplies helpfully. “Gojo runs hot.”
“And now it’s all over my floor,” Shoko mutters. “Next time, just wait ‘til the bathroom’s free, huh?”
Gojo looks like he has something to say just on the tip of his tongue, but he glances at you and seems to swallow it back.
“If anything, I made it cleaner,” he proclaims, leaning back on his chair. “Shoko, how long has it been since you cleaned in here? We really need to find you a partner who’s willing to do that stuff, otherwise you’ll keep living in fil—”
Shoko’s pencil case lands right in the middle of his face.
“You absolute brat,” she spits out, “I can’t believe you’d have the nerve to tell me something like that when you rely exclusively on Geto to—”
The bickering continues, but you tune it out. Under the table, Satoru’s knee brushes against yours. It’s almost hesitant at first, before he leans his leg against yours, when he realizes you’re not moving away. This isn’t the smart choice, either, but, ah, you’re always, always the smart girl. Is it so bad to have a night of fun? Is it so bad that you want to know what it would feel like to have him, even if it’s just once?
He’ll break your heart, the voice of reason says in the back of your mind, but then Satoru looks back at you, checking to see if you’re laughing at how he’s making fun of Shoko and, well.
You think you’ll let him.
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Any and all feedback in the form of asks, reblogs, comments, tags is highly encouraged and appreciated~ If you enjoy my work, interactions are what keep me writing and motivated!
I haven't written anything in months and I think it shows but, well, I have to restart somewhere lol, so I hope it was still fun for you and you enjoyed yourselves here for a little while. Thank you for reading <3
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yrluvjane · 2 days
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hi hi hi i'm sorry i've been off for a few days. you write so good. are you kidding me? about more requests, how about a reverse grumpy x sunshine because our boy James is the literal definition of sunshine. like reader is this no-nonsense type badass and he's just a sweet, yet protective but just overall a cutie pie?
eeee! I just finished writing this and i love it! Though, I don't know if this "grumpy", i lost that half way through writing. i hope you like it too! Seriously i love all requests, keep'em coming, honey <3
If James was a comforting, warm fire during the cold winter nights that brought everyone together, then you were the bracing, ice-cold wind that swept them all away.
The party atmosphere is wild, fun, and lively, with James dancing and drinking with some of your friends as the party rages on. It's a little odd to see you sitting alone at a table, casually nodding as Sirius drunkenly whispers in your ear.
You've noticed that from across the room, he keeps an unwavering gaze on you, his attention unwavering. When you turn to meet his gaze this time, you smirk and send him a teasing wink, as Sirius drunkenly rambles in your ear.
You turn back to Sirius, giving him your full attention, as it suddenly hits you that he may be high as well, not just drunk. When you turn to motion for your boyfriend to come over, he's gone. Your eyes search for him, and suddenly there's someone forcingly kissing your cheek as James appears with an enthusiastic grin on his face. "Gotcha," he proclaims triumphantly.
Sirius, next to you, slurs his words as he does a flossing gesture, "I mean it, Genius! Gets everything, y'know!" You can't help but humor him by nodding along, humoring his drunken antics. Then, James takes your hand, placing his warm fingers in between yours, linking them together tightly.
"What are you doing all alone?" James asks as he takes the drink from Sirius' hand. "I'm not alone, Sirius is here to tell me all about his newfound admiration for.. muggle floss. Now if you really want to impress me then you'd take your friend up to his dorm. " you say, your face splitting into a mischievous grin. James raised his brow in amusement.
"Wish they'd make a chocolate flavor, though."
They both faced the younger Black patriarch in confusion.
"What's a floss?" James' brows furrow, the confusion written all over his face. Even when you bite your lip to hide your grin, your eyes give you away, but before he has a chance to figure out what you're about to do, you turn to Sirius and exclaim, "Sirius, James doesn't know what floss is!" The black-haired boy turns to his friend in shock, mouth hanging open, his eyes wide with surprise. "Prongsie, no!" Sirius throws himself over your lap to reach James
"Okay, I get it. I'll get him to bed." James says with a heavy sigh, getting up from his seat. "Great! Cause I need to go take a shower." You say as you blow him a kiss. He faces Sirius with an exaggeratedly miserable demeanor, rolling his eyes at the black-haired boy. "Mate, I need you to tell me all about this floss thing," he says, his tone dripping with sarcasm. Sirius looks up at him with a confused expression on his face before breaking into a grin. "You'll love it! It's like a small thread and you put it in between your teeth!"
"What?"
When you return, a little over an hour has passed, and the party has died down significantly. The atmosphere is quieter now, with only a few small groups of people still clustered together in the corner of the room. Piles of passed out 7th-year students can be seen scattered across the floor as well. It's a bit somber compared to before, with most of the partygoers having either gone to bed or passed out from too much drink.
It's not long before you spot James sitting alone in the arm chair, his glasses placed neatly on a stand table nearby. He seems deep in thought, staring off into space as he relaxes in the quiet atmosphere of the now-empty party. You approach James, a small smirk on your face as you take a seat on his lap. "What are you still doing up?" you ask, your voice low and teasing. He looks up at you, his eyes filled with surprise, and before you can respond, he straightens up immediately, his voice firm and confident. "I have a girlfriend," he says, his mouth set in a determined line.
You tease him, saying "I don't see her," Without his glasses James can only make out colors. He looks up at you, a hint of amusement in his eyes. "Well, what I said was enough, and I would like to get off, please," he says, a hint of annoyance in his voice. You grin at his response and get off his lap, only to sit on the arm of the chair. "Okay, would you tell me about her? Your girlfriend, that is," you say, a hint of curiosity in your voice.
"Oh, where do I start? She's smart, kind, and beautiful. We've only been together for a short while, but I can already talk about her all day. She's the perfect person for me, in every way." He sighs happily as he throws his head back. "Oh, she's feisty. Like a dragon, you know? Adorable and dangerous at the same time. You always have to be on your toes with her. But I love her for that. She's strong, confident. I feel like she can take on the world and I just want to be by her side to support her. She's my everything... I'm a lucky man to have her in my life."
You blush and sniffle as you reach over to grab his glasses from the table, a small smirk on your face. "I don't know about you, but it sounds like you're in love with me, James," you say with a mischievous glint in your eye.
He looks up at you, taken aback by your sudden comment and the teasing tone in your voice.
You smile as you slip James' glasses back onto his face, making his eyes widen in surprise as he realizes it's you. He laughs, shaking his head in disbelief. "You tricked me!" he exclaims, a smile spreading across his face.
You tutted, "I thought you were really in love with me, for a moment there."
"Maybe...but only a little,"
You blush and gasp as James pulls you onto his lap, your heart fluttering with excitement. You wrap your arms around his neck, your face close to his, your body pressed against his. He smiles down at you, his eyes warm and tender, and you feel as if you can see straight into him.
You pull back slightly, looking up into his eyes. "Only a little, huh?" you say, a small smirk playing at the corners of your mouth.
"Yeah," he says, his voice soft and low. "I can't help it, I guess. You're just so... I don't know... you're just you."
You laugh, feeling like you're on cloud nine. "Aw, how sweet," you say, your voice laced with sarcasm. "I don't know about you, but I'm not complaining. This feels pretty nice."
He chuckles, his hand reaching up to brush a strand of your hair behind your ear. "It does, doesn't it? Think we'll work out?"
You grin, your heart thrumming with happiness. "Well, I'm a sucker for a good time. And you, James Potter, are definitely providing that right now."
He leans in, his lips brushing against yours, and you feel the sparks flying as your mouths meet in a passionate kiss.
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spiderfunkz · 1 day
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hi! i’d love to know abt your fav headcanon(s) for tasm!peter and maybe a little oneshot of said headcanon(s)?
peter parker falls in love HARDDDDD!! i love him and his nerdy ass like aaaaghhhhhh. he's so cutesy and skrunkly i just wanna throw a rock at him 💕
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peter parker is the type of person to go head over heels when he likes someone!! the type of person to steal a glance every time you're not looking. the type of person to secretly hope he'd get partnered up with you during class. the type of person to practice in front of the mirror before finally talking to you.
he's the type of person to notice every little thing about you. the pins on your bag of your favorite artists? he can name five songs. your favorite flowers? he walks past the flower shop every morning, hoping to buy you some one day. the way you always have that one mood ring on your finger, he finds it adorable.
he goes so flustered whenever you catch him glancing at you. his face turns all red and he starts giggling actually, your probably the reason he skips to school everyday, hands in pockets, twirling around in pure joy and excitement.
he'll brag to his friends on how he talked to you when in reality it was him saying happy birthday and you replying with a thank you along with a smile that surely gave him a cavity.
to summarize it up. peter parker doesn't just like someone. he loves them. pure admiration, adoration, infatuation, smitten. you're the light in his heart, the butterfly in a field of wildflowers, the red tulip in a field of white tulips.
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peter has liked you for a while now.
it was a long day of classes, he could've just skipped but aunt may found out he was doing that too much and got pretty mad. besides, it's just one more class. a class he never really had to try in. should be easy right?
yes, but no.
you just switched classes to biology. sitting in the only empty chair, just two chairs away from peter. he saw you, and that's when he knew.
you were never late, unlike peter. every time he comes in you're already there, smiling awkwardly at the situation as mrs. moore lectured him. but what's the point? peter wasn't listening, he was too busy figuring out what emotion was on your mood ring, and spoiler alert! it was love.
it took him a lot of convincing and reassurance from gwen, but he finally got the courage to talk to you. not about how the weather is, or the same old "did you do the _ assignment yet?". he was going to ask you out on a totally friends-only, platonic date ( that goes so well it will end up with you and him holding hands! ).
"hi!" peter smiled, his hand playing with his hair. "hey, peter." he seemed nervous, you were too.
"um, so, i was wondering if you.. would.." he looked everywhere but your eyes, "..that if we could, maybe, um.. hangout? together? if you want to. obviously, you don't have to but um-"
"no yeah, i would love to peter!" you smiled. was it hot? it felt hot, your face felt hot, does peter notice? he probably does.
peter's heart was racing through a field, it was winning first place. "okay, good- great! i could um. pick you up? i'll text you. you have my number right? i could just um- you know..." he played with the hem of his jacket.
you nodded, "yeah i do." — "okay, we could meetup somewhere.. maybe the park? is that boring? the cinema? anything you'd like, i'm fine with anything you know. or we could just.. hang.."
you smile, "sure."
"really?"
"yeah definitely, either one. or we could do all of them, i've got nothing to do." — "okay, that's super! super- cool.. super cool. i'll text you, is that okay?"
you nodded, "of course."
"okay, i um- i'll go now. i should go now. i'll see you? later?" peter asks.
"yeah okay!" you wave happily as he walks backwards towards the exit, nearly bumping into 2, no, 3 now, students.
"text me!" you yell out.
peter nodded eagerly.
he walks out, knowing gwen is not gonna hear the end of this.
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olderthannetfic · 22 hours
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I always see people who have never been antis, talking about/questioning how some antis even ARE antis when you look at their taste in media - ie the ever famous joke of "Hannigram is #problematique" "but it's a show where he eats people" or whatever.
I thought I'd weigh in as someone who could, hypothetically, be called an ex-anti (which, thankfully, nothing ever really came out of it - it was just very 2014 keyboardwarrior-esque behavior of me being a chronically online young adult who would share posts in a group chat making fun of certain shippers, or reblog posts about how 50shades is The Most Problematic Media Ever to exist -- basically I was an anti with anti-lines of thoughts, but i never, like, a ran a Shipping Discourse Blog or whatever)
For me, personally, it was a few different things. I can now see how it's incredibly hypocritical that teenaged me shipped Light/L, while still thinking that Dramione was Bad And Abusive. It ultimately boiled down to a) being pretentious, and b) just not understanding media or what proshippers REALLY believed, with a side of c) not realizing that nuance exists. like i was pretty late to join tumblr, I think I immigrated here during PEAK "yourfaveisproblematic" era which definitely did have an impact on my opinions and my tastes.
to elaborate, a.) being pretentious. i mean this one just kinda goes without saying. "I engage in media in a way more intellectual way than you do, don't you know that? You're a filthy and disgusting person who writes Snape/Hermione because you're an actually disgusting pedophile IRL who would probably date your own student that you're abusing if you could. Meanwhile, I'm a very smart, good, and pure person. When I read Uncle Vernon/Harry, I'm doing it in a G-d honoring whump way that clearly condemns abuse, incest, and rape. Unlike YOU who only writes harmful stuff as a way to get people off :/"
(as an aside, i think this line of thinking will ALWAYS be present in fandom and popculture in some way, sadly. ie the recent trend of people hating on booktok bc the books are 'trashy' and how these porn addicts should read real classic literature instead.)
as for b.), not understanding media - i cannot emphasize enough that i was GENUINELY stupid and disconnected enough to think that proshippers REALLY WERE pro-All Of The Degenerate Dead Doves That They Wrote.
why did i feel this way? why did i understand that Lolita clearly isnt pro-pedophilia, but for some reason i thought that someone shipping weecest was? well, first of all, i think that fanfiction is (generally) seen as Less Serious than classic literature, and fandom is a fun place, so i guess i somehow thought that every fanfic/fanartist who wrote Problematic Things, especially Problematic Things that they portrayed as Sexy, really DID enjoy the thought of that Actually Happening To Real People.
and i think THIS is the bulk of why antis ARE antis. i'm not calling them all stupid - i do think BEING an anti is stupid, but at the same time, there are people who are truly smart and good-intended people who just have some really off color opinions about, like, homestuck ships or whatever. Lawlight is okay because notebooks that kill people don't exist so it's IMPOSSIBLE for the Harmful Aspects of Light/L to be romanticized! but schoolyard prejudiced bullies DO exist and are a REAL problem so Drarry is BAD (*truly completely unaware of the fact that there's 'realistic' aspects of the Light/L dynamic and 'unrealistic' aspects of Drarry - such as, for example, Hogwarts arguably being even MORE of a fantasy setting than DN is.*) I know that media literacy is the hot buzzword of the year to throw around in 2024, but, like, i really did not have media literacy.
as for c.), not realizing nuance exists - ok "nuance" might not be the best word here, but i dont know how else to describe it. like, each time ive typed the word "problematic" out in this ask, i've done so in a very tongue in cheek/ironic/retroactive way, but, like, those posts about how Everything Is Problematic, Including Your Fave ARE true. and i didn't like the fact that my favorite media or favorite person might've Made A Mistake! i need to Talk About Its Issues Because I'm So Betrayed That My Dear Sweet Comfort Media Would Do This To Me. I Need To Prove I Clearly Condemn It.
like, i legit morally could not justify reblogging a twilight post without adding in the tags '#this is my guilty pleasure it sucks that the books were so racist though' or whatever. Most people were lucky enough to avoid that line of thinking, but there was an actual group of people who felt a genuine need to virtue signal all the time, partly bc, hey, they WERE passionate about talking abt #issues in media, but also bc of a subconscious fear of If You Reblog A Singular Piece Of Hetalia Fanart, You're Literally A Nazi And Will Get A Callout Post Written About You.
and during all of this i was at the tail end of my high school experience (yes i know im younger than most of your audience, ha). i was going through A Lot emotionally, going through a lot of life changes, and lived in a very . . . interesting household/place where i couldn't do ACTUAL good in the world that i was passionate about. so to make up for the fact that i was genuinely in no place to do legit activism, clearly i had to save the gay community by arguing about johnlock queerbaiting or whatever.
^ and honestly i do think that is the position of most antis. theyre isolated and cant seem to do Enough in the Real Scary World so they have to resort to talking about how bad of a person someone is for "shipping abuse", bc theyre not in a situation where they could, for example, ACTUALLY fight the good fight to end abuse or raise awareness for it.
There was way more to it and way more that I could say, if I wanted to, but this post is long enough as it is and probably doesn't make much sense.
I feel bad for antis, honestly, or at least the ones who are antis in the way I used to be.
--
Oh yes, passionate young fools who think they can at least fix the internet if not their lives make up most of the cannon fodder. Some of the ringleaders are just mini dictators and wannabe cult leaders, but most anti-leaning types are just traumatized or clueless, even a lot of the ones who do serious damage and don't just mock shit in private with their friends.
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catnipaddictt · 1 day
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jailbreak
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scott barringer x gn!reader
synopsis: You and Scott decide to escape New Horizons, a camp for at risk teens.
wc: 1.3k
tw: none
comment: there is a lack of Scott content on tumblr so I decided I wanted to write something. Also I fell in love with higher ground, i didn't think it was going to be that good, but i binged it in under a week.
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You kick at the ground with your beat-up old sneakers, watching as moisture falls from the blades of grass. Grumbling could be heard from in front of you as the ground of teens treked behind their leader. Ever since you had arrived at New Horizons, it was basically walk after walker. You swear once you are out of this place you would never hike again. But alas you had now been here for almost 2 months, and Peter sure wasn't letting you out anytime soon. 
Picking up your feet, you begin to follow your group as they walk uphill through the forest that surrounds the school. You make up the back of the pack, mostly just because you prefer to walk at a more leisurely pace. 
“Hey” you glance to your side to be met with blue eyes. Scott. He had been here for around the same time you had meaning that you were both ‘fresh meat’. If you could even call yourself that anymore. You reply back with a “hi” focusing on not tripping on any tree roots. Scott was at New Horizons for a drug related problem, something a lot of the students had issues with. He was normally standoffish and refused to participate but you two got along just fine. Which led to the little problem of your not so little crush on the tall boy.
“I hate walking” he states plainly and you agree, nodding your head. “I mean, how is this supposed to help, walking up hills isn't going to fix a bunch of messed up kids” Scott continues. “It sucks, I just want to get out of here” you reply. “Hey, what if we-” Scott seems to want to say something but changes his mind, shaking his head. “Nevermind.” You glance at him confused. “C'mon, you have got to say it now” you laugh. “It was stupid anyways” he grumbles at the ground. 
“Oh boo-hoo, just tell me” you practically beg. Scott sees this and ultimately starts to speak, “we could get out of here you know? It's only the forest holding us back I mean. And we have pretty much walked all of it twice over.” You turn your head to look at him, “you mean run away?” you ask. He has caught your full attention now. “See, told you it was dumb” Scott answers. 
“Let's do it.” 
“Sorry?” He states, “you can't be serious.” He raises an eyebrow. “Oh I'm serious. I have had enough of this place. Worst case scenario we get caught, that's like a few days of confinement to the cabins.” You reply smoothly. It was definitely a horrible idea but it's not like life was too exciting for you at the moment.”I mean, I'm down if you are” Scott shrugs. You think for a moment before replying. “Okay two days from now there is the school bonfire thing. We pack bags beforehand, I'll sneak into the kitchens and get us some food and stuff, and we can meet up by the docks. They won't notice we have gone for a few hours at least.” 
Scott looks at you “a few hours head start is probably as good as we are going to get.” He makes up his mind, “okay I'm in.” 
The next two days passed rather slowly, with not much really happening apart from lectures about personal wellness. What a waste of your time. You were counting down the minutes until your and Scott's escape out of here.
The final hours of your time at New Horizons were spent packing a bag, light enough to not slow you down, but enough to keep you going until you could get more supplies. Your next job was the kitchen.
The sun had almost disappeared by the time you reached the space, quietly opening and shutting the door behind you. You grabbed two large plastic bottles of water, placing them in your bag, as well as a few cans of food and lots of snacks. This was definitely enough to last you a few days. Getting through the forest should only take a few hours, the tricky part was not being seen around town.
Zipping up your bag you sneak out of the kitchen, making your way to the docks. You could see Scott's shadow cast on the wooden planks, giving his location away. You walk almost silently up to him and he jumps a little at you appearing. “Don't sneak up on me like that” he says playfully.
You nod your head in the direction of the path leading to the forest “time to go?” The light from the bonfire flickers over the landscape, making it feel like something out of a 80’s horror film. “Yeah, let's do it”
You both make your way out of the school and into the dense forest. There is nearly no light apart from the occasional bit of moon peeking through the canopy. Scott pulls two flashlights out of his bag, passing one to you “borrowed Auggie’s, hope he doesn't mind” he shrugs and you laugh. Poor Auggie had been robbed of his only torch. 
After about an hour of walking Scott starts telling you clearly made up stories about people getting lost in the woods never to be seen again. Typical teenager boy behavior. You roll your eyes in response - not that he could see. “That's so not real” you speak, only to be met with a yelp as he trips over a tree root. You cannot contain your laughter at the action. “Not funny” he grumbles. 
The next few hours pass in a blur. The clear night makes your walk nicer than you thought it was going to be. Scott being there helped a lot. You both exchange tales of your lives before New Horizons, Scott tells you about his football games and school. Up ahead of you, you can see where the ground drops about 6 feet or so, meaning you will have to climb down. Scott goes first, passing you his bag so you can throw it down to him once he is on solid ground. Once he reaches the earth again you throw down his bag followed by yours. He catches them and puts them down on the ground. Now it's your turn to make the descent. 
You make it most of the way down without fail, but the place where you put your left foot collapses and you are forced to jump back and onto the dirt covered ground. Luckily you don’t hurt yourself but in the process you manage to basically slam into your companion. He lets out a sound at the impact, “woah there.” “Sorry Scott.”
After another hour you finally reach the edge of civilization and you exchange grins with the blonde boy. You had made it with close to little hiccups. Making it onto town, you and Scott begin to brainstorm what to do now. “We need to get further away before first light, then people might see the two of us. And when Peter comes asking they will know we were here” You think out loud. “We could hitchhike?” Scott suggests “It's risky but if we walk further out of town we have a better chance of someone who is passing through and not a local?”
You agree to the plan and after a quick break from walking you both set out again. Now that you are out of the dense forest you can see the night sky. It's clear tonight and you can see all the stars, you will miss it in a way. But you made your decision. As you walk, your hand brushes against Scott’s prompting you to snap your arm close to your side, embarrassed. You can sense his head turning to look at you briefly before he looks straight ahead again. Then, if on second thought, he grabs your hand in his, interlocking your pinkies. You look down at your and Scott's hand and smile. Maybe, just maybe it would all work out fine.
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I'm not sure about the ending of this one as I kinda didn't know how to finish it but oh well. Im also finishing writing a whole heap of requests, so expect those soon!
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What clubs, teams, and other extracurricular everyone is in/will do?
Associated Reading: Past Extracurriculars!
Kai: Kai's only extra thing was temporarily being on the track team his first year, which ofc he quit when he dropped out. Doesn't take up anything new rn due to having his hands full with looking out for Lloyd (and just trying to get through school in one piece), but might get back into track for his final year.
Jay: Is still trying to make Robotics Club a legitimate thing, but until then, Sunni manages to talk him into getting back into doing science fairs (which also feeds into his upcoming extra credit project upupu). Might wind up doing Quiz Bowl or something similar in his last year too, if I'm feeling spicy.
Cole: Was into sports until The Dodgeball Incident, and doesn't take up anything new because a) he hates school, b) it's his last year anyway and c) most of his extra time will taken up by his part-time job at the Rockshot Club (does that count as a club? lol). Sometimes thinks about joining the art club, climbing club, or a dance club, but is lowkey afraid of how he'll be received. Might be able to be talked into doing climbing as a last hurrah, at least.
Zane: Obviously is on the student council, and is a member of the archery club (which has been mentioned in passing a time or two!) and the chess team. Probably would join more stuff if he could/wanted, but being on the Student Council (and the cold reception he receives) is already intimidating enough.
Nya: Also obviously on the council, would join every club if there was enough time in a life, but for now councilwork and her future job at the autobody shop takes up most of her extra time (thank goodness). ...Don't tell her a Debate Team exists, please. (Also might rejoin gymnastics down the line, should the opportunity arise)
Lloyd: The Green Ninja doesn't have time for such frivolous things, tch. ...that being said, his presence as a band member might lead to shenanigans in the future hgffgdd (buuuut he might join archery alongside Zane down the line, since while his bow and arrow skills are pretty good courtesy of his mother, he can still use the extra practice)
Jesse: Beyond councilwork, does not have anything extracurricular due to his job working at his family's place (and eventually furthering his career as a performer), buuut with the former being out of commission rn due to Great Devourer Aftermath, he's got some free time to spare...maybe by joining in on a little ninja training at a certain dojo? (He also was in choir but had to quit because he was too good. The music teacher still mourns his loss.) Might join the theater club for his final year.
Antonia: Beyond councilwork, is/will also be: in the newspaper club, on the yearbook committee, in photography, on the cycling team, on the swim team, runs a very informative blog, and yoga club. She gets up to a lot when not keeping up with ninja or keeping her best friend(s) in one piece hfdfdfghd
Harumi: Right now is just focused on her councilwork, but over the years she also gets into: VOLLEYBALL, National Honor Society (or the Ninjago equivalent), tutoring, history club, math league, debate club, martial arts, occult club, and AP classes...She and Antonia are out here doing the most.
Olivia: Has phased out of her extracurriculars due to the Shark Army being an active threat again, but was in the occult club and the dnd-equivalent club. Also probably should not be told about the Debate Team.
Miranda: Nerd. Pioneers a social media club, eagerly joins Jay's fully realized robotics club down the line, joins the soccer and ping pong teams, and does film club, a coding/website-making extracurricular (easy for her with her hacking skills), anime/manga club, and a graphic design club.
Sunni: Does science fairs like Jay, but also joins the student council cabinet after Zane graduates (Nya becomes Prez, Jesse becomes Vice Prez, and she slots in as the new secretary), partakes in spelling bees, charity work, volleyball (at least for one year, just to try it–she's not very athletic otherwise), tutoring, science bowl, and photography. Just, not all at the same time.
Harleigh: Is not academic smart whatsoever, but finds ways to flaunt her skills in other ways such as: jewelry-making club, fencing team, swim team, and the ceramics club. Also attempts volleyball but only because Sunni is there
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moongurl95 · 3 days
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7 Times the Charm
GN!MC / May or may not be an alternate version of a long fic I'm working on, but I've hit a writing rut and this prompt by @serpensortiamaxima (this is dedicated to you too OP!) got me churning out this piece until 4AM (now i can sleep with my brain empty! XD) also divider credits here
Summary: It was no secret that the Three Broomsticks can also be considered a social gathering for the latest news, and Sirona Ryan, the owner was at the neck of it. Or, a glimpse of a blooming relationship she'd observed since that Troll Attack in Hogsmeade. (One-shot also posted on AO3)
“Oh, there’s a face I haven’t seen before.” This may be the first time Sirona Ryan’s memory seemed to have failed her as she was confident in remembering her clientele.
“It’s my first time here.” The student had replied almost sheepishly, which explained everything to the bar owner. Of course, she’d heard about the latest talk in the streets of a Hogwarts student having been caught in a dragon attack.
“Welcome! Butterbeers on me.” Sirona assumed that the student was a transferee, after all, she’d never heard of a student starting this late in their Hogwarts education. “Glad to see you two escape injury.” She glanced between the two students with growing worry, having planned to check on the other shopkeepers and residents once the crowd had buzzed down from the recent Troll Attack in Hogsmeade.
“Thanks to this one. Single-handedly took down a Troll!”
“Is that right? Well done.” Of course Sirona couldn’t take the Sallow boy’s claim seriously, not when she was sure of the way the boy had looked admiringly at his new classmate. Before she could decide to play matchmaker however, they were interrupted by some brutes’ arrival.
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The second time Sirona next saw the pair was on a relatively calm day in the Three Broomsticks, she considered herself not eavesdropping at all while the two students had quite the passionate discussion over a round of Butterbeer.
“Honestly! Why do you have to trouble yourself on a trip to get something for my sister? Anne wrote she’d be delighted by your very presence alone.”
“Because Sebastian, it’s common courtesy to bring a gift when visiting your friend’s family.”
Now this seemed to be a development. Sirona had to keep herself looking busy as she wiped away at the mugs on the counter, casting a knowing glance by the corner table to quickly spy the flustered look on the Sallow boy’s face.
Sirona could only hope to Merlin that his ‘friend’ fancied him the way he seemed to.
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In exchange for asking her assistance on where to find her friend, Lodgok, Sirona in turn thought to request the new student’s help in retrieving her box of letters. Though she never would have predicted they’d also come as a pair this third time around.
“I’m not letting you go alone. And for Merlin’s sake, why a mine of all places? Do you happen to know what sort of creatures could possibly live there??”
Sirona could only watch in amusement as the Sallow boy was being pushed out by his classmate in an attempt to shush him, “Alright, alright – I’ll tell you all about it on the way. Just get going so we can at least finish this while there’s still sun out.”
The door to the Three Broomsticks had shut after their departure so Sirona could only guess how the rest of their day would go. One thing was for sure though, if she’d initially thought the Sallow boy only fancied his new friend before, then now Sirona was absolutely certain the boy was now smitten.
Maybe there was good reason to owl Mirabel after all, nothing better than an entertaining chat about young love over tea.
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The next time Sirona served Butterbeer to the new student at the counter, she was half expecting them to be with a familiar face. Instead, they sat alone, looking quite under the weather as they seemed to stare unseeing into the tankard, Sirona was just about ready to lend a listening ear after she’d served all the other customers’ orders when the student had stood up just as a familiar Slytherin entered the premises.
Sirona was quick to notice the two of them weren’t on speaking terms as they passed by each other – the Sallow boy taking the stool beside where his friend just left. She chose to quietly serve him his share of Butterbeer before she continued to keep busy.
“Sirona, would you apologize if you said something… true but ended up sounding… mean?”
So that was how it was… “Well dear, first of all, it’s not what you said, but how you made them feel. So yes, an apology should be expected.”
“But… how?”
Sirona raised an eyebrow at him as if to say the answer should be obvious enough, but ended up sighing in exasperation as the boy looked pitifully at a lost, “If you aren’t ready to tell them personally, then a letter might suffice, and don’t make it just a simple apology either – at least, offer to take them somewhere you’d think would be meaningful to them.”
“A letter! That’s just it, of course!” Sirona watched as the boy waved his hand in thanks as he rushed out the doors, she hoped everything would turn up for the better the next time she saw those two together.
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It didn’t however, for just days before the 5th, Sirona herself had received an unmarked letter notifying her of Lodgok’s passing – his gentle soul did not deserve the fate he was dealt with by his brother’s hands. Yet also here in her supposedly lively pub, sat another lost soul who she dearly tried to keep from straying to the Hog’s Head by keeping the Sallow boy’s tankard refilled with Butterbeer.
She’d heard he just lost his uncle and that the Sallow girl also informed him late, the poor twins were now left all alone.
And just when Sirona felt the boy slipping away, from the doors came in a face who she hoped would be successful in reeling Sallow from his darkest thoughts.
“Sebastian!”
Sirona was glad to see the boy encased in a hug, he dearly looked like he needed one…
“You’re safe now. I promise, I wouldn’t let them take you away.”
It may have well been a secret language only the two students shared with each other, but Sirona was nonetheless relieved to see the boy’s shoulders relax, the undeniable soft sob that escaped him was a sound that would forever tug at her heart.
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And it seemed that heart wrenching sob echoed around the wooden panels of her establishment as the once lively pub was filled with students of varying years, all of which ranged from sniffling for their parents to a quiet uncertainty that loomed over the older ones.
Hogwarts was under attack, and despite how Sirona herself could not believe such a situation would even come about, the evacuated students who took shelter in the Three Broomsticks were enough to leave her unsettled for what was to come.
“Sirona! Are they here? Did they at least stop by here?” She could only shake her head in response, clearly seeing the Sallow boy was distraught.
“Sebastian! We have to settle ourselves and wait for Black’s announcement –“
“They could still be there, Ominis!” His next words were barely audible but somehow Sirona managed to catch a hint of it, “What if they’re fighting for their lives – alone? Against a Goblin Rebellion!”
“Attention, students!” Black did make an announcement right after that, clearing his throat as if today was a normal occurrence, “I am proud to announce that my esteemed faculty has handled the – uhm… rebellion. Yes, the Goblin rebellion – wait, what was that?”
Everyone seemed to hold their breath as a House Elf seemed to whisper the latest news to his master, who gasped out as if he was scandalized, “A casualty you say???”
Sirona felt her heart drop at the sudden news, she could only watch as Sebastian Sallow all but rushed out of the doors, fearing for the worst.
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Fear melted like snow from a season past, and while Spring came a bit too late for those who grieved, the flowers still bloomed.
The Three Broomsticks was once again abuzz with an energy of celebration and nostalgia – students crowded with relief at having survived their O.W.L.s and others were busy planning their summer ahead – two of which Sirona couldn’t help but approach, “Butterbeers on me, to the Hero of Hogwarts.” She’d winked before leaving the pair in their usual spot by the counter, not really meaning to overhear…
“So… I heard Fig left you a place in his will, back to London it is for you then?”
“Yes… and Feldcroft?”
“Can’t say I relish the thought of spending summer by myself, but I have a way to keep busy by doing some odd errands here and there, I suppose.”
“What would you say to a ticket to London?”
“What..?”
“I was only really planning to spend a few weeks there, fix some things that need to be done and well… spend some time in Feldcroft with you… if you’ll have me?”
“Of course! I – but why even take me to London – not that I’m complaining but –“
“Because I care, Sebastian. I – care about you… very much.”
Sirona couldn’t keep herself from spying a glance then, very happy to see the pair both sporting flustered faces. It may have taken a while, but there wasn’t a perfect time than any to start anew.
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voxofthevoid · 2 days
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Shibuya Swap Wednesday #8. The fic is currently 14 chapters and 78k and far from over. Turns out that when I sprinkle in bits of self-indulgent plot in Part 1, I'll have to follow through in Part 3.
Yay.
This is entirely SFW, somehow—canon!Yuuji meeting Chōsō after alt!Yuuji sorted out the whole brother business. Gojou's there to, uh, supervise.
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“I’d like to have some time alone with my brother.”
“And I’d like your shared parent’s head on a platter, but only one of those is gonna happen.”
“You intend to hunt down Kamo Noritōshi.”
“Well, he’s going by another name right now. You’re familiar with it.” There’s an edge to Gojou’s voice that makes Yuuji crane his head to look at him. But Gojou’s staring right at Chōsō, his eyes gleaming behind the shades. “But not for long. Yuuji—the one from Shibuya, not my cute little student—said you have an ability to sense family via a blood connection. Can you track that parasite using it?”
Chōsō blinks, looking nonplussed. “It…doesn’t work that way. And I can only sense my siblings, not our parent.”
Yuuji can feel Gojou shrug, their bodies close enough for it.
“Worth a shot, but it doesn’t matter. I’ll find them myself,” he says, and two heavy hands come to rest on Yuuji’s shoulders. “Meanwhile, we need to figure out what to do about you. I wanted to see your reaction to Yuuji—”
“I feel like a lab rat, sensei.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. Chōsō here is the lab rat,” Gojou replies without missing a beat. “You’re not violent. Or you’re one hell of an actor. Either way, it’s not enough. You know why, don’t you?”
Chōsō nods very slowly. “I understand.”
Yuuji looks between the two of them, but Chōsō’s somber expression is as unhelpful as Gojou’s bland smile.
“Sensei?” Yuuji prods. “Want to tell me what’s going on?”
“I want to tell you many things, Yuuji,” comes the unhelpful answer. “But I’m not sure now’s the right time. What do you think, Yuuji’s new big bro?”
Chōsō looks a little like he’d like to strangle Gojou. But under and over that, there’s an emotion Yuuji’s all too familiar with—guilt.
“I killed people,” he says, “at Shibuya. There’s good reason your teacher doesn’t trust you with me.”
“Honest to a fault, huh,” Gojou mutters.
Yuuji doesn’t say anything. He’s not very surprised. Gojou didn’t tell him details of how Yuuji’s other self rescued him, but he did say they Chōsō was among the people who trapped him. And Yuuji saw the state of the station. He could make an educated guess or two about what was in store for the civilians there.
It doesn’t make it better. It doesn’t make it right.
“You’re angry,” Chōsō says without surprise.
“Yuuji,” Gojou says, squeezing Yuuji’s shoulder, “is a very good boy.”
“Sensei,” Yuuji sighs. “Of course I’m angry. Innocent people didn’t deserve to die because the lot of you wanted Gojou-sensei out of the way.”
“No,” comes Chōsō’s quiet agreement. “They did not.”
“But—” Yuuji pulls his hand out from under Chōsō’s and steps away from Gojou too, putting some distance between himself and both men. “But your brothers didn’t deserve to die either. It was us or them, and I chose us. I don’t regret it, but that doesn’t make it right. I’m angry about what you did, but you should be pissed at me too.”
Chōsō’s expression does something that Yuuji can’t even begin to parse. Gojou looks an odd cross between amused and exasperated.
“Sometimes, Yuuji,” Gojou tells him, “you’re too noble for your own good.”
“I’m really not—”
“Thank you, Yuuji,” Chōsō cuts in, his voice quiet but choked; his eyes are suspiciously shiny. “But I meant what I said. Esō and Kechizu would never have fought you if they’d known the truth. You didn’t know either. They’d forgive you. It’s what brothers do.”
Yuuji shifts in place, with no idea how to respond to that. The sincerity in Chōsō’s voice threatens to choke him too.
Gojou has no such issues: “You know, I’ve never been unhappy I’m an only child, but I feel especially glad right now.”
“Sensei, don’t be mean,” Yuuji chides. “Please ignore him, Chōsō-san.”
“Don’t call me that,” Chōsō says, eyes all wide again. “Just Chōsō is fine. Or you could call me big bro—”
“Nope,” Gojou says.
“I wasn’t talking to you, Gojou Satoru.”
 Gojou’s grin widens dangerously.
Yuuji closes the scant distance he put between himself and the other two, slotting himself between Gojou and the couch, directly in front of Chōsō.
“Chōsō,” Yuuji says firmly. “Sensei. Behave.”
“Scary,” Gojou whispers dramatically, leaning against Yuuji’s back. “Well, you two seem like you’ll get along fine. Very compatible crazy. But for now, you need to go back to sleep, Chōsō.”
“Huh, why?” Yuuji asks, looking up at Gojou and nearly slamming his head into his jaw; Gojou smoothly avoids the collision, resting his chin on Yuuji’s head instead.
Chōsō’s eyes have narrowed, as severe as the set of his mouth. “I’d also like to know why.”
“I don’t trust you,” Gojou says plainly. “I’m willing to tolerate you for Yuuji’s sake, but at present, we can’t let a special-grade curse—or a grade-one sorcerer, if that’s the path you want to choose—run around unchecked. We don’t have the manpower to safely contain you either, not until the mess you and your friends made is all cleaned up. Sleep or die, those are your choices.” There’s a pregnant pause and then— “Sorry about this, Yuuji.”
“I…don’t think I’m the one you should be saying that to, sensei.”
“That so?” Gojou asks, his voice dangerously mild. “So, what do you say, Yuuji’s brand-new brother?”
Chōsō’s expression is blank, in a severe kind of way. The shadows under his eyes seem darker, and the eyes themselves are pools of near-black, fixed unwaveringly on Yuuji.
He says, “I won’t ever hurt you.”
Yuuji blinks. “Thanks? I wasn’t worried though?”
“Unfortunately,” Gojou says, “your brother complex isn’t enough of a guarantee right now. Don’t worry. Once I’m back, you’ll have a very generous chance to be on your best behavior.”
“What happens to Yuuji in the meantime?”
“Nothing.” One of Gojou’s arms slides around Yuuji’s middle, just as his chin is lifted from Yuuji’s head, and then he’s being tucked against Gojou, snug and secure. All of Yuuji grows pleasantly hot. “Only a few others know about Yuuji’s connection to you and the parasite, and all of them are more invested in Yuuji’s safety than the rules. He’ll be fine, and as long as you behave, there won’t even be any complications.”
“I don’t think you need to keep threatening him, sensei,” Yuuji ventures. “I mean, you made your point.”
There’s a deep sigh, Gojou’s chest moving against Yuuji’s back. It feels so big like this. Gojou feels so big, like he could swallow up the world.
Yuuji tries not to think of this morning, of being tangled up in warmth and safety, of being touched—
“You have no flair for the dramatics Yuuji,” Gojou says mournfully. “The least you can do is appreciate mine.”
Yuuji pats the arm wrapped around him. “I do appreciate you.”
“You trust him.” Chōsō’s voice is very quiet, but it cuts through the air.
And it’s not a question, but Yuuji still says, “With my life.”
Gojou’s arm tightens.
“I see,” Chōsō says with a gravity that makes Yuuji’s spine snap straight; Gojou moves with him, accommodating the motion. “Then I choose to sleep, for now, Gojou Satoru.”
“Wise,” Gojou says softly. “Lie down then. This won’t hurt.”
Chōsō’s expression darkens like he doesn’t really believe that.
“It doesn’t,” Yuuji chimes in. “Promise. It really just feels like going to sleep.”
Chōsō’s eyes flit to him and stay, and Yuuji can see Chōsō soften all over. It’s a bit disconcerting. There’s so much there that Yuuji doesn’t even understand. He’s an only child.
He still feels like one. He can’t much imagine that changing despite Chōsō’s existence.
“I’m not worried about pain,” Chōsō says very gently. “But thank you, Yuuji. Please be safe.”
“Sure. I’ll, uh, do that.” He flashes Chōsō a thumbs up. “Good night?”
Gojou snorts and steps away from Yuuji, circling around the couch to kind of…loom at Chōsō.
To his credit, Chōsō doesn’t give anything away, though Yuuji can’t imagine he’s not unsettled. He can’t imagine ever being scared of Gojou, but he’s seen the way his teacher gets sometimes, the way his smile twists under radioactive eyes. He’s seen curses flinch from it.
Chōsō doesn’t flinch. He calmly lies down on the couch, crossing his arms over his stomach. Throughout it all, his gaze stays on Yuuji, flickering away only when two of Gojou’s fingers are inches away from his face.
“Night night,” Gojou chirps, tapping Chōsō’s forehead.
Dark lashes flutter, eyes rolling back. A second later, Chōsō’s face is slack.
“That was fast,” Yuuji whispers.
“It’s more delicate than it looks,” Gojou says in a normal voice. “I was impressed the other Yuuji knew how to do it. I’ll teach you some day. You won’t misuse it, will you?”
Yuuji blinks over at Gojou. “Misuse it how?”
“How innocent,” Gojou practically purrs. “Don’t you know what boys like you would do to a pretty sleeping thing? Or do you want to be the pretty sleeping thing?”
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sanaxo-o · 3 days
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Magnetic (Eric Sohn)
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Too @sohnric : Happiest Birthday my Eric Stan 🥺. Omg you’re older now damn…okay to start off I hope you enjoy your day to the fullest and keep on being unhinged like always 🥺. Thank you for always being there for me and saving my ass from Izzy 🧍‍♀️. I love you loads and I hope you always know that. This is just something small I prepared for you since well…it’s your birthday. I hope you enjoy this even tho it’s not that good 🥺😭. Love you <3 and yes this is the reason why I did not ask you too beta read the Eric fic 🧍‍♀️💔. P.S don’t worry I did not stay up the whole night. I set an alarm clock to wake up sat 3:30 😚. I hope I wake up 🧍‍♀️. If it comes late then you know why that is! Well last but not least, enjoy your day to the fullest :) let’s keep on talking about Weak Hero Class 1 and what not in the future too <3
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Warnings/Genre: friends too lovers, cursing, making out, mentions of food, Eric is kind of flirty (I tried), sunshine x moon trope, reader is very oblivious, reader is a psychology major (idk if psychology majors have jury or no but I searched on google and google said arts students have jury so I think I am right but ik it’s wrong!), drinking but not really since they don’t drink in the scene (reader is just getting the after effects of drinking), reader likes to crochet! A small joke made out of the Shakespeare drama Julius Caesar 😭. I guess that’s it…lmk if I miss anything!
Word count: 6,077
Sana: Hihi, I am back with an Eric fic (I have more Eric fics than I have for my own bias wow). This is just a small something I wrote for bar so I hope you guys also like this. A special and huge thanks to @quaissants @strayed-quokka and @o-onikix for beta reading this and helping me in the process. And also a huge thanks to @sungbeam for making the banner for me 🥺🫶🏻. Love you. I was too scared to ask ally to beta because it was not my best work 💔. I was gonna add the other banner for this but then my friends moms said that it looks like he has a pacifier in his mouth so I was like nvm 😭.
Taglist: @cloverdaisies @sohnric @mosviqu @deoboyznet
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🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
All this was new to you. These feelings, these butterflies wandering in your stomach, the feeling of love, those red cheeks, the feeling of falling in love and at last, him. He was new to you.
All these feelings you had were so new for you. Deep down you always knew and expected to love a man similar to you, and yet he was the complete opposite of what you could’ve imagined.
That is why it was a complete shock for you when you understood your true feelings for Eric Sohn, who was the complete opposite of what you expected your partner to be.
He was like the sun, always bright and drawing everyone's attention, annoying the hell out of them. And you were like the moon, lover of quiet places because they’d let you wander around your own world.
He was the polar opposite of you. You liked having your own space while he…well he loved getting into other’s space and annoying the hell out of them. That’s how you liked to describe him most of the time.
If anyone ever asked you what you thought about Eric,the first thing to come to your mind was ‘He’s a good guy but he’s noisy.’ Which is true! No matter the time or place,Eric would always have at least some energy to spare for you.
Sometimes you admire him for having that much energy in him. Like how can someone go a whole day screaming here and there without feeling tired or having a sore throat??
Blinking your eyes,you look down at the crochet you were working on, only to sigh in disappointment when you realise that you had messed up the pattern, again.
Still continuing with your work,you pay no mind to the people around you who were talking and screaming loudly with their fellow peers. You were fixated on finishing on whatever this was going to turn out to be.
“What’s that?” You hear a voice ask from beside you which makes you halt your hands and look up, only to give out a small grin when you realise that it was none other than Eric Sohn.
“Ah well…it was supposed to be a cute frog but I don’t know what it is anymore.” You mumble quietly as you go back to crocheting the now demonic frog (that was your personal assumption).
“I think it’s cute though.” He says softly as he looks into your eyes when you look up at him again.
You divert your gaze everywhere around the room, just to ignore his. Everything was now interesting, even the guy who was hogging the food. Your cheeks continue growing bright in colour as you try your best to avoid his intense gaze.
“You do not have a good taste then.” You say with sass as you elbow his stomach when he snorts at your reply.
“Really? But I am friends with you. Does that still mean I have bad taste?” He says cheekily and places his head on his hands which were placed on the table. Looking up at you he brings his hands up and pokes your cheek softly.
“That’s not what I meant! You know that!” You yell at him but soon a small smile comes up on your lips when you feel his fingers poking your cheek continuously.
“Your words, not mine but, let’s leave it like that. I came here to ask you something else..” Eric says that as he sits up properly while fixing his now messy hair.
You stop your hands from crocheting as you push Eric's hands away from his hair when you realise that he is just making them more messy than they already were.
“Your eyes are pretty..” Eric whispers softly. You momentarily stop fixing his hair, as you stare into his eyes for a moment, only to cough to hide your embarrassment.
“Stop that..” you say shyly as you fix his last strand of hair and move away from him to keep some gap between you two which you had closed without neither of you guys realising.
“Stop what? And you coughed on my face, thank you very much.” He says sarcastically as he grabs your handkerchief to wipe his face jokingly.
“Whatever,” you mumble as you snatch your handkerchief from his hand and go back to crocheting. “What did you want to talk about anyways?” You mumble as you again fix your gaze on the frog (which had these huge ass eyes and looked more like a demonic creature hence, the name.) you were crocheting again.
“I was wondering, since we’re free after our jury today and the sem is over now.. We would mostly be free, right?” He asks cautiously as he takes away your frog and places it on the table to have your full attention on him.
“Where are you going with this?” You ask in complete confusion when Eric takes ahold of your hand in his and places them on his lap making you face him.
“Promise that you won’t back out once I tell you about the plan.” He says while putting his pinky finger in front of you, urging you to lock yours with his as a way to keep the promise tact.
You stare at him and then at his finger for a moment before letting out a small sigh at his childish behaviour. “Fine, promise. Now tell me..” you say with a small grin when he breaks the fingers apart but still having a hold of your other hand in his large ones.
“We have a sealed deal, okay? This gesture means that I can break your finger if you don’t stay true to your word and break our promise!” He says while pointing his finger at you. You only smile at him and nod your head when he boops your nose with his finger.
“Everyone was planning to go to the amusement park tomorrow in the evening…I was wondering if you wanted to join us? Wait- no I want you to join us.” You stare at Eric when he says that.
You didn’t hate going out per se, but you would rather just stay at home on the last day of the sem,catch up on your lost sleep and the dramas—be a couch potato in general.
You had a lot more time to have fun with your peers and friends the day after. You just needed some alone time away from everything and just focus on yourself.
Before you could even back down you remembered how you had promised Eric to not back out of whatever he was about to ask.
“For how long?” You ask him as you stand up and grab your stuff to exit the cafeteria with Eric by your side.
“Just for a few hours. We were planning on going to the new restaurant which had opened up but if you get too exhausted we can just go over to your place and order some food. I know how you get when you’re exhausted..” he says with a smile as he grabs most of your stuff and carries them for you instead of you having to ask him to do so.
You smile at his gesture knowing how he would always step in first to help you out even when they’re just small things.
You liked how he was always so observant and not full of himself unlike some people you knew in the past.
It’s the little things he does which makes your heart beat grow faster. It makes you feel like you just came back from running somewhere or as if you dashed through the hallways to reach your class on time.
It’s as if your heart starts pounding whenever he is closer. You sometimes wonder if you can hide your feelings well or not. Because even from afar, he looks so…surreal. The only thing that comes to mind when your eyes meet his is ‘oh my gosh, his eyes are so pretty’. You do wish to drown in those deep eyes, sometimes.
If staring at him for the whole day was a paid job you’d probably be a billionaire by now because of how much you stare at him.
“Maybe we can go to the nearby club when I am more free? Just the two of us are fine.” You tell him as you grab your books from his hands and enter your class, not waiting back to hear his reply knowing he was just going to agree with what you just said.
🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
Standing beside Eric you look around in awe amazed by the different kinds of rides in the park.
You notice Eric walking away for a moment saying he wanted to buy something urgently so you paid him no mind and just gave a small nod at him acknowledging his words.
you were so immersed by everything that you failed to notice his return. He came back, holding two cotton candies in his hands.
“Here.” You hear his voice beside you.
Looking at him your eyes gleam with happiness when you take notice of the pink coloured sugary sweet in his hand which he was offering to you.
“Thanks!” You say happiness evident in your voice and your features as you take a few bites out of the cotton candy.
“Woah, can we ride that?!” You shout in excitement as you grab Eric’s hand and pull him towards the queue to buy the tickets for the ride.
You look back at Eric when you see him just standing behind you with a straight face, no expression adorning his facial features as he smiles at you nervously when he notices your excited gaze looking back at him.
“What’s wrong?” You ask once you notice his nervousness.
“Are you sure…you want to ride that?” He asks while scratching the back of his neck while trying to look anywhere but you.
He could feel his cheeks heating up in embarrassment knowing he’s just ratting himself out by trying to avoid getting on the ride.
“Yes! I have always wanted to try this out with someone!” You say with excitement as you wave his hands around trying to convince him to get on the ride with you.
“Since you’re insisting and begging so much…I might as well get on the ride with you. Don’t worry, you can hold onto my hand if you get scared!” He says with fake enthusiasm (and probably even gaslighting himself into believing that he would be fine on the ride) as he grabs your hand and drags you towards the ticket counter. “Ticket for two please.” He requests the cashier.
“We don’t have to ride it if you’re scared or something..” you reassure him when he starts walking towards the first seat of the ride.
“No, I want to. I told you I am there to protect you, didn’t I?” He bluffs as he lets you settle down in the ride before getting in right after you.
After helping you fasten your seat belt,he looks around the area in wonder when he feels the ride moving slowly.
He could feel his palms getting sweaty with fear and nervousness when the ride started moving, but he tried his best to stay calm and collected.
Closing his eyes he pays attention to the sounds going on and off through his ears as he tries to drown them out when he feels your warm hands embracing his sweaty, colder ones.
Peeking through his right eye he could see you looking ahead with excitement when the ride came at the most exciting part.
“Can…can you hold my hand?” You hear his small voice squeak through his throat as he holds out his hand for you to hold it.
“And you said you were the one to protect me.” You tease as you immediately grab his hand in a tight grip to help him calm down.
“Woah okay…” you turn your head and look at Eric’s flushed face as you rub your thumb against the back of his hand in a way to give him some comfort. “Why is this going so sl-” before he could complete his sentence a loud scream escapes his lips as he pulls you closer to him with great force.
Letting out a scream you look ahead of you as you feel your heart thump in fear that’s what you hoped so when Eric clutched your hand tightly while pulling you closer.
You could feel his breath fanning your face making you shiver. Closing your eyes you look away from his face as you look around the view when the ride starts to slow down.
Loosening your hand which was gripping onto Eric’s, you slowly let go of it as you immediately undo your seatbelt and get out of the ride when the ride comes to a complete stop.
“Oh..let’s go to a restaurant or somewhere..” you mumble tiredly as you start walking away from him. Too embarrassed and shy to look at Eric’s face.
“Aren’t you tired though?” Eric mumbles once he catches up to you. Gripping onto your hand he takes hold of your purse so that you can walk more freely.
“You don’t have to do that..” you say softly as you try to take your purse back from him only for him to gently push your hand away in reassurance.
“It’s fine. I can handle that.” He says as he pulls you closer by your waist and leads the way to his car. “Oh…is this the frog you were crocheting?” He mumbles once his eyes catch the small crocheted item made by you.
Keeping it in the backseat, he helps you put your seatbelt on. “Let’s head back over to my house. You already look exhausted with all the activities you did.”
You look over at him when he says that. He really does pay attention to the small details related to you. “I thought you wanted to go out and have some dinner with the guys?” You say softly while eyeing his side profile.
His lips which always looked so kissable, you admit to yourself that there were times when you had thought about kissing Eric but he does not have to know that, now does he?
“Hmm no it’s fine. I would rather spend the night with you than listen to them talking about some stupid things.” He says with a chuckle as he gives your hand a light squeeze in reassurance. “Oh by the way, can I have the frog you crocheted?” Eric asks once he had stopped laughing.
Looking at you for a split second, his eyes travel down to your lips for a split second only for them to divert back to your eyes.
“Why would you want that?” You question back, your brows furrowing in confusion as you grab your purse from the backseat and stare at the crocheted frog which was handing on the chain.
You didn’t exactly like it because it was not your best piece, you were still learning and you just crocheted for fun and to help you with stress.
You made the frog crochet into a keychain because you did not want to throw it away despite it not being the best thing you made.
“I like it, it’s cute!” He says with a smile on his face. His cheekbones rising up making his cheeks look puffy (in a cute way of course).
“It’s so not cute, Eric..” you say with a sigh as you shake your head at his silliness when he whines at your answer.
“Why can’t I just have it? I like everything you crochet..” he replies back once the car comes to a halt at the red light. “Come on, let me have it. I will treasure it the same way I treasure you..” he says softly as he places his hand on your thigh to convince you.
Looking up at him you break eye contact almost instantly when you notice him staring at you intensely, “Look at me..” he whines as he places his hands on your cheeks and makes you stare at him. Squishing your cheeks together he lets out a small laugh while looking at your lips which were in an ‘o’ shape. “Give me the frog please.” He pleads while batting his eyes together in a fast motion to try and convince you (well hopefully).
You could feel your heart beating at a fast pace again. If you could, you would just kiss him but that’d be too reckless of you, no? Snapping out of your thoughts you clear your throat and speak up.
“I can make one for you especially..” you say, your words coming out a bit jumbled because of your cheeks getting squeezed together.
“You can?” Eric asks softly as he slowly pulls away from you and turns ahead when the light turns green.
“Of course, since you so badly want the frog I can just make something else for you. Something better..” you say with a nod as you keep your bag in the backseat again.
“But I would still be happy if you gave me the frog crochet..” he replies in a sing-song voice as he turns on the radio to play some songs.
You sigh when he says that, there’s no winning against Eric when it comes to something he wants. You knew how stubborn the latter was. Youjust couldn't argue with him, especially with those eyes of his, which would always sparkle when talking with you (it might be your delusion speaking, but you always saw his eyes sparkle when talking with you and you only).
You smile in delight when Eric plays Best Years by 5sos. He still remembers your favourite artist. He was also the one who accompanied you to the concerts and saw you going crazy, so it was kind of an unforgettable experience.
You sigh in satisfaction as you look out the window in content while humming and singing along to the lyrics of the song while Eric drives the car.
🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
Entering the house you place your bag on the counter table as you go in the washroom to wash up.
Knowing Eric, he might already be ordering some food so that was least of your worries. The guy knew your favourite food all too well.
Turning on the shower you wait for the water to get hot as you strip off your clothes.
Once it is lukewarm, you enter the shower as thoughts start to occupy your mind.
Did you really like Eric? Or was your heart just not functioning properly? And….and those butterflies wandering in your stomach when he does or remembers something you like. Oh gosh! You never felt this way for any guy before, that’s for sure.
You and Eric are like the polar opposites, everyone knows that. They still wonder how you and Eric are still together as friends knowing how the other guy is.
You were someone who always preferred your own space, you liked being in your own shell and just being lost in your thoughts.
Eric was the opposite! He was always outgoing, just like everyone calls him the social butterfly and boy was he true to that name given to him.
He could instantly make anyone comfortable with him be it a small kid, an adult or someone older than him. He had that kind of charm in him.
Getting the bottle of shampoo which Eric had you start washing your hair with it as you think back to the time when Eric had approached you.
Flashback
Sitting at the back of your stats class, you try your best to pay attention to what the professor was saying but it was not that easy.
The headache you were having since the morning was getting worse, now it was truly your fault for going to a club with your friends on a Sunday night knowing you had early classes the very next day.
But what could you do when you just wanted a few drinks to get your mind of all the stress the major you were majoring in was giving you?
To put it simply, it’s not easy being a psychology major. The amount of assignments which are piling on your desk at the dorm and at your house along with all the essays you have yet to turn in.
No matter how many times you stay up all night the work just keeps on increasing, as if you broke the stop button.
So when your friends offered you to tag along with them to the nearby club for a few drinks how could you even turn them down? So of course you went along with them and had a little bit too much.
Massaging your temples with your eyes closed you try your best to think of something else. Anything to distract yourself from the massive headache you were having.
“Here, take some painkillers.” You hear a voice say from beside you. Turning your head around you could feel your voice getting stuck in your throat when you see the man sitting beside you.
Messy blond hair, he had decent casual clothes on. A pair of a hoodie with a cap on top of his head which was now in his hands since he was trying to fix his strands of hair which were getting in his eyes.
“Let me help you.” You say softly as you lean closer towards him and help him fix his hair.
You don't even know where you got this confidence from but it’s as if your hands moved on its own before you could even comprehend what you were about to do.
Leaning closer to his face you fix his hair as your eyes stay focused on his hair. You try your best to not look anywhere else but the oversized hoodie was revealing his collarbones and you were oh so tempted to check him out but you stopped yourself.
“You have pretty eyes.” You hear him say. You did not even know his name and you were already blushing at something a stranger said to you? How could he have such a huge impact on you so quickly was beyond your imagination.
“Oh thanks haha.” You say with a shy voice as you move away from him before you do something you’d regret (example: kiss him).
“Oh here. Take it.” He says once you move away from him. Sliding the pills to you he grabs your bottle of water which was beside him and opens it up for you.
“How did you know I was having a headache? I don’t think we've ever met each other before.” You question him while taking a pill in your hand.
“Oh well we have a few mutual friends but we never talked with each other before. I was at the club yesterday and noticed you.” He explains himself while grabbing a random paper which was lying beside him to doodle on it.
“Ah I see..thanks for the medicine…?” You furrow your brows when you realise that he never introduced himself to you.
“Oh! It’s Eric but you can call me anything you’d like. Maybe…yours?” He says with a flirty and cheeky smile adorning his oh so handsome face. Standing up from the chair he gets ready to leave the classroom only to turn around to look at you again. “See you around..” he waits for you to complete the sentence.
“Y/N,” you say with a small smile. Scrunching up your nose, you close your eyes when he pats your head with his hand.
“See you around, Y/N.” Eric says as he starts walking away.
Flashback end
Turning off the shower you leave the washroom with a bathrobe wrapped around your body.
Opening up the closet of Eric’s you look through his clothes when your eyes catch the black hoodie off his. The same one he was wearing on the day you both met for the first time.
Grabbing the hoodie you slip into the clothes as you start drying your hair with the towel Eric had kept for you.
“Wait, let me help you.” You hear Eric’s voice say as soon as he walks in the room.
You look at him through the mirror as he helps you in drying your hair with the towel.
“You’re wearing that hoodie.” Eric says with a grin as he grabs the comb to untangle your hair.
“It’s comfortable..” you mumble with a small smile on your lips.
—x—
Sitting on the couch, you take a bite out of your pizza slice as you turn on the TV to watch the series.
From the corner of your eyes you notice Eric taking out a packet of ramen making you let out a groan in annoyance at his behaviour, “Why can't you just eat some of the food which is served right here instead of making some noodles which you inhale almost everyday?” You question him once you have swallowed your food.
Eric just shakes his head as he smiles at you sheepishly. You knew winning against him was useless since he won’t listen to you either ways so you just let him be and continue eating your food while sipping from your can of coke (very original 🙄).
Giving him a slice of pizza which was in your hand you rest your body against the armrest of the couch as you place your legs on his lap so that you can be more comfortable and relaxed.
Heaving out a sigh you look at the TV screen when a question pops into your mind. You give Eric a look as you notice how his whole attention was on the TV.
You always wondered why that man was never dating anyone when so many girls out there were quite literally dying for him. Even the slightest bit of attention given by that man to them made them feel accomplished.
Well technically in their eyes you were the one person who has accomplished their dream. Which was too close with Eric and well…you might be the only girl who would get his whole attention whenever you want it.
The man would quite literally drop whatever he was doing just so he could talk with you. That was also the reason why everyone used to call him a simp and a lovesick puppy for running around everywhere just to be with you.
“Why are you not dating anyone?” You ask suddenly while staring at Eric’s side profile. You widen your eyes when Eric starts coughing while holding his chest.
Immediately sitting straight you grab the glass of water which Eric had brought along with him. Standing up you walk beside him in hurry as you help him drink the water while rubbing his back soothingly hoping it’d help him calm down.
“Feeling better?” You asked nervously once Eric had stopped coughing. Once he gives a slight nod to your question you sign in relief as you go and take a seat beside him.
Taking a seat you grab ahold of Eric’s hand while massaging them gently.
“Why did you ask that question so suddenly?” Eric mumbles as he takes a big gulp of water while trying to control his breathing.
You just simply shrug at his question as you look away from him, anywhere but him. You did not have it in you to look him in the eye after asking such an absurd question.
“I was..I don’t know. Curious maybe?” You say in a hushed tone as you slowly bring your gaze back at him. If someone saw you right now, they’d think you dreamt about something scary because of the way your eyes were shaking. “I mean don’t get me wrong! It’s just that…everyone wants you as their boyfriend but you never pay attention to them. Why’s that?” You question him slowly.
“Do you want me to be your boyfriend?” Eric asks softly as he fully turns his body towards you to face you.
You could feel yourself choke at his choice of words as you immediately let out a nervous laugh when he says that.
“What are you talking about? I am serious Eric…” you say with a shy chuckle as you slap his shoulder gently. Trying to play it off coolly.
“Well then what about you then? A lot of guys I know like you, they even asked you out but you always turned them down. Why’s that?” He asks the question with his brows raised, waiting for you to answer his question.
You look down at the ground in wonder. Why did you turn them down? It’s not like you were waiting for someone else or were you? You immediately shake your head when you realise how Eric was avoiding your questions.
“Don’t change the subject!” You say with a glare as you flick his forehead gently.
You smile softly when he acts as if the flick hurted him knowing damn well that he was just acting to tease you.
“Do you just not see it?” Eric says while rubbing the back off his neck shyly.
You stare at him in confusion when he says that.Notice what? The way he pouts whenever he’s eating something he likes? Or the amount of tattoos he has on his body? Or maybe the fact that he's always having the same heart eyes when talking with you? Well of course you would ignore the last bit! But he doesn’t have to know that, now does he?
You just shake your head at his question, waiting for him to make himself clear so that you can assure yourself that whatever your hunch was telling you was in fact correct! “I like you silly..” Eric finally says with a small airy chuckle leaving his lips.
He moves closer towards you so that he can pull you closer, “I have never paid this much attention to someone before but you. It’s like…I am magnetised whenever I am with you. I cannot feel myself wanting to leave your side whenever we both are together. I always try to play it cool when it comes to you but I just seem to fail at that. Everyone knows that but you..everything about you sticks to my heart. It’s like…it’s something I cannot express in words.” He says softly while pulling you closer.
All you could ever think about at that moment was, ‘Oh my god?’ You couldn’t get yourself to believe it when Eric brought himself closer towards you, you immediately snapped out of your thoughts.
“Is it fine…if I?” You give him a small nod when he asks that.
And there it is, the spark you always felt whenever he did something oh so small but it always somehow made you feel special.
The way he gently grabbed a hold of your chin slowly moving to the back of your neck while his other hand gripped onto your waist, squeezing it lightly he pulled you closer while moving his lips in sync with yours.
You could feel yourself shiver at his feather light touches, especially when his hands started to travel up towards your spine. The lingering sensation stayed there even when his hand was already engulfing in your hair.
You immediately entangle your hands in his hair while kissing him to deepen the kiss.
—x—
You wrap your arms around Eric as you pull him closer towards you. You never thought you’d ever be cuddling with Eric like this.
I mean you never thought of Eric as someone who’d enjoy being the one being cuddled but looking at the man right now you could tell that he was enjoying this more than anyone.
You slowly snuggle closer to Eric as you listen to his calm breathing. You never thought that this day would come but here you are, laying on the same bed with Eric Sohn, cuddling together.
To say the least, you were content with what you had at the moment. This is all you could ask for.
🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
Entering the auditorium you sigh in embarrassment when you see Eric, Sunwoo and Haknyeon playing around with the props which were lying on the stage.
It’s been a few months since you both made your relationship official. Everyone around you was obviously more than delighted to hear it, I mean the lovesick boy's love was finally accepted by you.
And ever since you guys made the relationship official, of course you guys were named for being the cutest couple and for making the singles in the group more single than ever because of how you and Eric flirt all the time when together.
You walk towards them with your hands behind your back as you let out a chuckle when Eric falls on the ground dramatically.
“Et tu, Brute? Wait no…Et tu, Sunwoo?” Eric says with hurt as he looks up at Sunwoo who was holding the sword in his hand with a crazy smile on his face.
You widen your eyes when Haknyeon pours some water on the floor as a way to depict the blood shed by Sunwoo.
You notice how Chanhee, who was sitting on the edge of the stage, starts hiding his face because of his friends behaviour.
You just go and take a seat beside him while you wait for Eric to take a notice of your presence.
You were about to open your mouth to speak with Chanhee when a loud voice beams through the whole auditorium making you laugh, “Y/N!” You immediately stand up from your seat and open your arms, waiting for Eric to hug you like always.
“When did you get here, sweetheart?” Eric mumbles, his face being placed on the crook of your neck as he melts in your warm embrace.
“Just now while you were imitating about being stabbed. I was about to talk with Chanhee when a certain someone came running here.” You say with a teasing smile.
You laugh when Eric glares at Chanhee playfully before holding you closer, “Mine!” Eric says to Chanhee before sticking his tongue out at him.
Chanhee just sighs and nods at the younger’s behaviour as he stands up from the seat to walk away from you both.
“Where are you going?” Eric questions in confusion when Chanhee starts walking away towards Sunwoo and Haknyeon who were, well…throwing water at each other.
“Not interested in looking at you both being all lovey dovey in front of me!” Chanhee shouts back as he gets on the stage which was a great mistake because he apparently became the boy's next target.
“You’re just jealous because you don’t have a girlfriend like Y/N!” Eric teases and laughs loudly when Chanhee throws a middle finger at him while trying to save himself from the two boys.
Diverting his attention back to you he offers you a smile as he takes your hand in his while walking towards the exit door only to stop when you start looking through your bag.
“Here..” you take out a small crocheted keychain which was of a flower. It was abit tiny in size but it’s something Eric would cherish so you were more than happy to make something so special for him.
“For me?” He asks in astonishment while gently taking it from your hand. Scared it might fall apart if he grabs it aggressively.
“Sweetheart, it’s beautiful.” He mumbles while immediately attaching the keychain on his bag.
“You like it?” You ask with happiness. You were glad he liked the item you crocheted. When he gives you a nod you immediately hug him tightly. “I am glad you do! I was gonna crochet something else but then it turned out to be Sunwoo in evil form so I discarded it.” You say with a smile as you pull away from him.
Eric laughs at your choice of words while holding your hand tightly in his grip.
“Want to get some ice cream?” He asked once you were out of the auditorium.
Seeing you nod enthusiastically, he immediately starts dragging you towards his car.
Well as they say, opposites do attract and you were glad you found Eric. He was kind of like your other half, you never thought or even dreamt about this moment but here you were, going on an ice cream date with your boyfriend.
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astriiformes · 1 year
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Talked about this with the counselor I've been seeing at school earlier today but my intense, desperate need to leave a mark on the world (not even in a fame way, in like a "I need to leave this place better than I found it in a big, tangible way" one) and the fact that I only value myself when I feel like I'm adding good to it paired with the fact that I've been an insane perfectionist since I was a very young child and tear myself to shreds and lose all my confidence over tiny mistakes is literally going to kill me some day
#had been thinking about applying for a leadership position in our university ostem chapter for a while now#but psyched myself out of it last night before applications closed#because with everything that's gone wrong in the student group i was involved in this year i no longer trust myself to be a good leader#or frankly even a good person#i also had a slightly soul-crushing talk with a professor yesterday about my grade in her class#because even though she clearly thinks i'm brilliant (and basically said as much) i missed like two weeks of class#specifically because something happened with another student who i know i managed to make upset#(on accident. but it seems like she found my apology wanting)#and i feel so awful about it that i decided the only way to handle this was to avoid her so i didn't make her uncomfortable#so now my grade is suffering in a class i could've gotten an 'A' in#and it's just like. what am i even doing#i care so much about making the world a better place but i feel like such a bad person and trying makes it worse#and i know i'm under no obligation to put myself through this kind of stress but i don't know how to value myself if i don't#lately i feel like i'm beating myself up for being too fragile and unstable to even make a good martyr#and i know it's not healthy but if i try to step back i just get sad#like how now i feel awful about not sending in that application. and at least half dozen other similar things#i just want to make a real impact but it feels like the only thing i'm good for is making things worse#i'm not even fun to be around most days. i'm just.... sad
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cupiare · 22 days
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walking into work tomorrow for the staff training day after i got rejected for the job i was near guaranteed to get and didn’t find out the news from my boss who i was with the whole morning in TUTOR PLANNING DAY FOR NEXT YR FOR TUTORIALS THAT TUTORS WOULD BE DOING THAT I WAS BOOKED INTO WITH THE TUTORS THE ROLE I APPLIED FOR AND HAD A VERY GOOD INTERVIEW FOR i found out from a noreply auto generated email from hr that was sent out as soon as i stepped out of the meeting room :) and then got invited back to the meeting for the rest of the day where my manager repeatedly talked about taking my good ideas from my interview and implementing them into tutorials next yr. after i got rejected via generated email. How we doing guys 😆
#p#me personally. and not just me literally everyone else coworkers students anyone but my manager apparently was in my favor#like advocated for me#i got insanely good feedback from everyone#like that job is. mine already. i’ve done that job and my job and i did that voluntarily#no hate to the other candidate lovely girlie she is but being told my interview was great#and my teaching task was great and she’s never seen HER OWN GROUP OF STUDENTS so engaged in a task before#and then being highly praised for my vision and ethic etc#and me knowing this shitass school and system inside out and still wanting to be here and being passionate abt what i do#and STILL i get turned down. thats personal i take it personally#but bcs i know this place i wouldn’t have been surprised if it was just that#its the cruelty of how they let me know#this entire day was like being spat in the face#like thanks for all your hard work! bye now! you won’t be here much longer but we’ll take all the good things you’ve come up with!#i’m so shocked#i had a go at my manager and APPARENTLY the email wasn’t supposed to go out ‘yet’ but its a very convenient coincidence that it did then#isnt it#i’ve never in my life felt so disrespected ngl#like i still didn’t get a proper conversation about it ???? literally only got good feedback and a quick apology???#how dare you and what did i do to you to deserve this like literally#my feelings are CRUSHED its essentially like getting laid off#cause i’m gonna leave soon anyway its like yeaaa we don’t want you actually#well then ! thanks for treating me like a valuable employee and person with feelings
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fractallogic · 1 year
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It would be so much easier to leave my house in the mornings if I didn’t constantly have to go “okay did I pack a lunch did I adequately feed myself breakfast am I accidentally going to give myself a migraine because I didn’t eat enough” because I’m stalled between the lunch thing and the breakfast thing and when this happened yesterday I fell asleep and didn’t get anything done because I never left for campus!
It would also of course be much easier if there were lunch places close by, but. uh. Not so much.
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arthur-r · 1 year
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i love (love) (/not correct not sincere this is an untrue fact about myself) dissociating at band practice and then being expected to sing about wanting to kill myself it’s so fun
#fuck. like i’m the person writing these songs but they are not for these moments#catharsis is something you can experience while you have some semblance of a will to live. not when you are staring into space blankly#feeling like a broken person. and actually at that very moment wanting to die#anyway i’ll be okay. just got home. this mom and kid were in the elevator with me up to the apartment and the mom recognized my cello#(​as being a cello i mean) and asked me about it and i told her i’m in a punk band about it and she said that’s the coolest thing#so that was good and cool. and they live on the third floor i live on the first so i might not see them again. but it was nice#and band was fine. and my band likes my song. but sometimes it actually is bad to sing about this stuff sometimes#(especially because it’s like. this particular song is also about. insecurities in relationship. and i’m able to play the song because i#don’t really feel those insecurities as much any more and i’m in a better place with regards to. not spiralling about being loved. however#that only applies to the relationship insecurities of that moment. when i was writing it. and i went a while without developing new ones#but now there’s a lot of irl friendships that feel as unstable as i felt at that time. and so now the song means something to me directly#and now it hurts again. and it’s not good. i’m like scared for certain people to ever hear it)#anyway my mom and little sister are actively waiting for me to come out of the bathroom where i sit typing this. and tell them how band was#and whatever i say will not involve any of these facts. but i sure have to go say it#so idk. i love you guys. struggling a bit. but i’ll be okay. scary current relationships mentioned = nobody here i feel pretty stable#i have built relationships that i feel confident about. with the most important people. and that is really good and i’m glad#there are other newer scarier relationships that i am going insane about. a teacher and two students and a coworker. wish me luck#anyway i have to go. but yeah. idk. i’m so tired. heading out now. be back in a bit#me. my post. mine.#delete later#suicide mention#ask to tag#vent cw#(kind of)#friends only
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pepprs · 2 years
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my onboarding has been a complete and total fucking mess it’s so stressful i want to just explode. lol
#purrs#finally got on payroll but can’t submit my time sheet bc my last student / intern timesheet WHICH SHOULDNT EVEN BE THERE bc i was in my#transitional position!! is still in my timesheet center and i already filled out a docusign time sheet for that pay period so i shouldn’t ha#have to worry abt it but i can’t submit any timesheets until that blank one gets removed by someone in payroll but a lot of ppl are on#vacation so im like wtf lol. im now on the first day of my 4th week and still haven’t gotten the email to sign up for benefits which iwwas s#supposed to get in my 2nd or 3rd week and i literally need to make appointments and figure out what im paying for counseling. still haven’t#found a carpool bc that fucking asshole wants to charge me $100 for a months worth of rides which i think is overpriced personally and also#he creeps me out but i can’t search for another carpool bc there isn’t a group for staff / faculty to like ask questions and this guy was#supposed to be my connection to helping me find staff / faculty in Columbia but instead he just inserted himself and it’s like i kinda hate#you and don’t want to ride with you but i literaly don’t think i have a choice. and then ofc my supervisor decides to leave RIGHT NOW so its#like i have to go out and find a ‘cultural contact’ who can get me acclimated to staff life bc she was supposed to do it and now she’s#fucking off to ****** so i have to replace her while ALSO taking her place w a whole bunch of work stuff AND being on the search committee w#which is launching this week. and im just about to punch something. this process has been so turbulent and frustrating i just want to be#settled in and instead km hitting roadblocks every step of the way and ppl including my close colleagues are still tagging me in my student#email when they don’t have to and they KNOW i hate it and want to have my staff email show up as much as possible. lol. ughhhhhh#i keep telling myself it’s like stars. my student star has gone out but the light takes time to travel to earth and it’s gonna keep hitting#for a while and im gonna have to deal w that. but in a couple months time god willing it’ll feel better. meanwhile i have completely paused#my quest to earn my permit and find a place to live bc i just can’t handle it rn and also im isolating myself again lolllll. so things are n#not good and im scared my counselor is only gonna give me 30 minutes like last time and spend most of it talking… we’ll see. i have more#thoughts but if i don’t go now i will be late for work lol 😃✌️
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greppelheks · 7 months
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mourning again
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