#the thing is i have problems with food but i dislike being skinny

[amazinglyegg]

JAY! JAY! JAY! JAY!

The most basic survivor with the most basic story! Very long ramble about him below the cut (sorry)

Physical appearance

Short, skinny, pale (malnourished vibes)

Part way through his story he loses his eyes from a grenade and gets synth eyes as prosthetics

Has scars all over his body from that incident, as well as the average amount of scars for a wastelander

Always wears long sleeves, usually a white tshirt

Jean jacket over top with some silly little patches!!!

I am terrible at clothes so idk what pants he wears. Vaguely grey probably

Other outfits you'll see him in are any random clothes he needs when going undercover in the railroad (he keeps an outfit in his bag for synths still in their old uniform!) and rarely the Brotherhood flight suit when it's laundry day

Backpack

Big ol' hiking backpack he scavenged in sanctuary, also ties his sleeping bag on the bottom

Food, water, and caps are necessary

Sketchbook and pencil to keep him busy while having to sit around and wait, loves sketching and journalling

Teddy bear! Lovingly named Mr. Cuddlesworth, keeps him tucked away so nothing bad happens to him

Fancy Lads for any synths he comes across, also (not in the picture) a blank box filled with chems for bribing his way out of problems with raiders and the like

Uses his baseball bat, especially before he got comfortable with guns, but occasionally uses Rightous Authority and a combat shotgun

Keeps an extra knife on hand as well as pepper spray and a rape whistle, both of which he kept on his body since pre-war

Stats!

Physically weak but very perceptive - not very high charisma but his perception usually helps him along

High perception means he has very sensetive ears, which can both be useful and a problem (prone to sensory overload!)

His perks aren't based on his SPECIAL at all

Medic - he was trained as a scribe in the Brotherhood of Steel, much more comfortable healing than fighting

Vans - He's practically reliant on his pipboy to keep track of all his quests! It has a detailed map and GPS that can even give directions out loud

Rooted - He's a freeze response type of guy. 100% deer in the headlight vibes

Personality

He's a big ol' scaredy cat!

Trauma from the vault has left him absolutely terrified of enclosed spaces, the dark, and radroaches. Also dislikes loud sounds, the cold, alcohol, and chems

He likes touch and always gives out hugs and handshakes! He also likes the sun (and light), nature, sweets, sleeping, being non-violent, and brahmin

He's a crybaby and will cry at every little thing. Just give him 15 minutes and he'll be fine

He's very naive and trusting, especially starting out. He just blindly goes along with what anyone says, and that becomes an extreme as he tries to cope with how much the world changed

Everything's in ruins now? Okay. There's cows with two heads? Okay. You're going to rob me and steal all my money? Okay... wait.

Always tries to see the best in people and things, and will much rather get shot than risk shooting someone who may not be a danger to him (hey, maybe they're only aiming a gun at him because they misunderstand! We can talk things out!)

Very rarely gets angry or loses his cool - tends to just cry instead. Not too great in the wasteland!

He doesn't like kids (and didn't like Shaun, which he feels guilty about...) despite being so childish and friendly. He gets along with them great! He just... doesn't like them...

Story

Jay has two storylines of sorts, one of my first playthrough and one of my second playthrough that diverges a bit

My first playthrough is a Railroad playthrough

Jay is Shaun's older brother. Their father was a veteran and Sanctuary was a small neighborhood specifically advertised as PTSD/veteran friendly (AKA HOA had a field day with banning fireworks and loud parties, and didn't bother with much else...) - Codsworth was also part of a pack for veterans!

Jay gets some basic survival skills from Preston and the group (after becoming severely ill due to a 200yr old immune system, but whatever) and leaves with Codsworth to Diamond City

He meets Nick and joins the Railroad quickly after! However Codsworth gets pretty beaten up in Vault 114 and after staying with Arturo for a while Jay convinces him to go to Sanctuary where it's safe

At some point Jay runs off on his own to try and collect the last few of Winter's holotapes, which is where he gets cornered by gunners in Quincy and throws a grenade which bounces off the wall and back near his own feet

He was mostly blind and severely injured, and staggers his way back to Railroad HQ (thanks to his high perception + VANS to guide him) where he gets taken to Doctor Amari and gets his synth eyes

He infiltrates the Institute and befriends X6, and also finds out he's a synth after reading a terminal he was told very sternly not to look into

In the same way Shaun is sort of a test for child synths, Jay is a test for teenage synths, as well as to study personality and emotions, and how a synth would grow if they believed to be human

Barely anyone knows this, save for Father and maybe a few other scientists, so Jay keeps it a secret until the Railroad is attacking the place, where he tells Father on his deathbed that he knows the truth

Father tells him that they're not real brothers and he feels nothing for him, and Jay responds by telling Father that he loves him and that their parents would be proud of him before mercy shooting him in the head

He adopts synth Shaun and gets adopted by Nick, making a family of entirely robots (including Codsworth!)

Far Harbor comes after this and stuff happens idk this is getting very long, but DiMA is his uncle!!

The second playthrough, which is forever unfinished, is a Brotherhood playthrough, follows all the main plotpoints above with a few changed details

Instead of immediately leaving to Diamond City after Call to Arms, he and Codsworth stay with Danse and his group with the promise of food, shelter, and in-depth survival and weapon training (he's still relying on his baseball bat at this point despite his horrible strength stat)

Codsworth eventually goes back to Sanctuary (all this fighting stresses him out) and Jay does still find the Railroad and go along with them, but he spends a majority of his time on the Prydwen learning everything he needs to know

Jay's still supportive of synths but is less active in the Railroad, and he finds out he's a synth around a week or two before the events of Blind Betrayal

After Blind Betrayal Jay leaves the Brotherhood and goes for a Minutemen and Railroad ending, where the two factions sort of combine, and a lot of settlers are either rescued synths or helping the Railroad in some way

Danse is also in the Minutemen! Although he's mostly unaware of how involved in the Railroad they are - Jay is trying to ease him into it slowly but it's taking a WHILE to unlearn all that Brotherhood propaganda!

Jay isn't as active in the Railroad in this playthrough, and he's more critical of their ways of doing things. He's a bit more distant with Nick (as Danse sort of takes the roll of surrogate father) but generally the vibes are the same

These two stories somehow both exist equally in my head, so I guess they're both "canon"!

Fun facts!

Jay is a genre of person. Whenever there's an RPG and I can't tell if I should make an OC or pretend to be myself, I make Jay! He also exists in Stardew Valley!

Jay is my middle name, but not on purpose. While getting my name changed my mom offered to include Jay as a middle name (unrelated to my OCs) and I went along with it. Jay had already existed for a while before this!

Jay's original design included a hard hat. I decided it wasn't for him.

Jay disliked Codsworth and Shaun before the war. He was going through an angsty phase and was a bit jealous of not being the only child anymore. He feels very guilty about it now

He can't bring himself to go back to Sanctuary anymore so most of the Minutemen's work is done at the Castle

During The Lost Patrol he finds himself alone at the Revere Satellite Array and trades a bunch of food, water, and caps with the Super Mutants in exchange for Scribe Faris' holotags (and his life). Danse is not happy about this

Despite the fact I never travelled with Curie or Strong in my playthroughs, he's friends with them! He thinks they're pretty chill

The first person he tells about being a Synth is X6, and he asks whether he knew. X6 had no idea.

He doesn't tell Nick for a looong time because of his reaction when DiMA asks if he's a synth. He asks DiMA for advice after the events of Far Harbor before he tells Nick.

[TRIGGER WARNING beyond this point for claustrophobia, suffocation, roaches, PTSD, and suicide] He spent several hours stuck inside the vault, barely able to move or breathe due to having to dethaw in an already cold room. His cryopod couldn't open from the inside and he was slowly suffocating as the seals were air-tight. He had to claw his way through the cushioning to get to some wires that, when broken, finally released the doors.

He was still too weak and pained to move, and the radroaches started swarming him once they sensed fresh meat. They didn't do much damage to him but it was still very traumatizing

The first thing he did as soon as he got out of that room was try and shoot himself with the 10mm. The safety was on and he didn't know how to switch it off, so he gave up

Attempted suicide again a few days later after the power armor from the Museum of Freedom reminded him of the cryo pod and triggered a nasty flashback (plus the general stress of everything), but gets stopped by Codsworth. After retelling this to Captain Cade he finds out that it's not a "normal panic attack" and that he does in fact have PTSD, and that he's not allowed in power armor until he gets his symptoms under control.

#You WILL learn everything about my sole survivor and you WILL enjoy it #i'm writing this at midnight so theres probably so many spelling errors im sorry #this is my attempts at organizing him and his story at least a tiny bit #his story is very malleable and I keep switching it up whenever i get a new plot idea! #anyway ask me questions about him if youd like. i will attempt to answer them...... or make up the answer on the fly idk #fallout 4 #sole survivor oc #my art #oc art #oc jay

[silverbladexyz]

Congratulations on 100 followers! You deserve every Single one of them for how amazing your writing is!

I noticed you were doing matchups so I decided to participate for fun, feel free to do anyone else’s if mine doesn’t have enough info for you! Sorry for being all over the place with it😓

I’m a 5’4” 1/16th Russian, 1/8th Asian Caucasian female and I’m 18 years old. I’m generally pretty energetic, but not overbearing energetic and I only fall asleep when my eyelids tell me to (unless I have homework due for a class I’m falling behind in the next day) and I’m not one to leave my dorm unless I need to eat or go to class or meet my friends/family. I take responsibility if I know no one else is going to do it in a messy organized way. I’m easily taken advantage of because of my naivety and gullibility. I act like I know more about death, murder, and dark things like that when really, I’m too weak to actually hurt a fly. I love to write stories, read manga, and watch anime. I’m not good at arguing my points, but I can make people addicted to things I’m obsessed with. If I become interested in something, I become obsessed with it, so I have read the light novels, Beast AU, seen the entire series twice and Dead Apple. I don’t mind spoilers though. I love making new OCs for different shows (but I’m EXCESSIVELY SADISTIC about it) and I love to read Yandere!Reader, Suicidal!Reader, Depressed!Reader, and [other anime character]!Reader, Character x Readers to soothe my depressive tendencies. I have severe epilepsy that’s near incurable and my grades are mostly A’s and B’s except for a couple classes with D’s. I eat like one or two meals a day (sometimes none because of medication) and when I do, it’s like two pieces of pizza or a tiny bowl of alfredo pasta, so I’m really skinny and light. I have slight acne, but it’s not too noticeable. You asked for people we dislike, I’m apologizing in advance, but I’ll just give you the characters I do like, crush wise or think-they’re-cool-and-would-want-to-be-friends wise. (I’m a total simp for Chuuya or Dazai’s death glare, especially when a slight shadow covers it)

Characters: Dazai, Ranpo, Yosano, Kyoka, Kenji, Tanizaki, all Beast!ADA except the President and Kunikida, Kouyou, literally any Chuuya from any plot point, Akutagawa, Gin, Tachihara, Elise (don’t match me with her, she’s just really cool and funny but way too young), PM! Dazai (both Beast! AU and regular series), Mark, Fyodor (the dub accent tho❤️❤️❤️), Nikolai, Tecchou, Jouno, Teruko, Odasaku

I have a problem…😅😓😭

Heyyy sariel!!! Tysm, and no, it's not too over the place, and the info was quite sufficient 💗

The images do not belong to me. They belong to their original owners.

Calculating...

Your sibling figure is... KENJI MIYAZAWA!!!

-He's such a sunshine omg

-Kenji is always smiling and encouraging you. He always manages to brighten up your day, and he loves seeing you smile as well

-I feel like he wouldn’t really understand the dark things you like (he’s too innocent for that) but he will smile and say ‘That’s so cool!’

-Kenji is interested in reading your stories. He will always give you constructive feedback, and it actually gives you motivation to write. He’s always the first one to read your stories <3

-Kenji is lowkey worried for your health, because he has never met anybody who ate quite little food, or sometimes nothing at all. Definitely gets you some light but nutritious food from his own village, and trust me those foods work like magic

-He doesn’t mind chilling in your dorm with you. You could be studying, reading, doing whatever, and Kenji will either doze or read a book to keep you company. He makes little to no noise or distractions, and his presence actually helps you focus more on studying

-If you need help with moving something heavy, just ask Kenji! With his super strength, it’s easy for him to move almost anything, and he loves helping you. He would even like to give you piggyback rides if you asked

-Hugs and headpats!!! Kenji was probably a bit inexperienced when it came to platonic affection, but in time he’ll love it and he might even start doing it back to you. Sometimes, his headpats would end up ruffling your hair and making it look like a mess, but he would stop if you asked him to

-He will read and watch the mangas and animes that you recommend to him. Just please keep it suitable for him

-Kenji would like to take you to his village one day and to let you meet everybody back at his hometown. He knows that you would be welcomed, and he’s quite excited everytime you ask him about his village

-If anybody takes advantage of you, Kenji wouldn’t be afraid to teach them a lesson with his super strength. But everybody in Yokohama knows not to make Kenji angry anyways, so you’re safe ^-^

-If you’re having a bad day, Kenji will smile and say some of the sweetest things ever to you that just makes you smile too. He knows just how to cheer you up, and he’ll be happy to cheer you up forever <3

-He does ask Yosano on some tips for your health, or he sometimes sends back to his village for some medicinal herbs that always worked

-Overall, he is the BEST YOUNGER BROTHER EVER! Also he’ll never be annoying towards you, because he is too sweet to do that 💗

And your parent figure is... YOSANO AKIKO!!!

-Yosano is a chill, but kind of strict parent figure

-She worries about your health, and buys you medicine that helps you. She wishes that she could heal you with her ability, but unfortunately her ability could only heal physical wounds. She does make you food that helps you become stronger though

-Yosano also likes dark stuff herself, especially morbid stuff. So you two could literally have a chat about anything dark and not worry that the other person can’t take it. However, Yosano does remind you about the value of human life

-If you’re feeling depressed, Yosano will try her best to help you with it. She has a few ways to help your depression, and they work all the time. However, if you want to be left alone for a while, she understands and won’t push you

-Yosano is pretty strong. So if anybody hurts you, you bet that she’s going to bring her cleaver, beat them up and also teach them a lesson that they’ll never forget. She is pretty intimidating when she wants to be

-Brings you out shopping with her sometimes, but she doesn’t buy too much stuff since she doesn’t want you to carry anything that you can’t handle. She’ll also buy you whatever you want, as long as she approves of it

-If you ever get hurt, Yosano would give you extra special treatment. She reserves the best bed in the infirmary for you, and she’ll make sure that you aren’t in any sort of pain

-Anime nights!!! Basically you two would chill at your dorm or hers while watching any type of anime you liked while eating popcorn. Yosano likes spending time with you and she has pretty similar tastes in anime. I headcanon she likes Tokyo Ghoul and Assassination Classroom

-Also tries to be a good mother figure to you. If you engage in activities that are harmful to you, Yosano would be quite strict and bans them from you. But please understand that she wants the best for you

-Overall, a headstrong, cool mother figure that is a girlboss

And last but not least, your mentor is... DAZAI OSAMU!!!

-Dazai doesn’t really mind your knowledge and interest in dark stuff. Afterall, he was the demonic prodigy of the Mafia, and people all around him were accustomed with death and blood and whatnot. Doesn’t mean that he won’t be a drama queen when you do say something quite dark

-He does hate how you get taken advantage of though. Dazai knows how easily people could get manipulated and used, and he himself is familiar with the act. But the thought of somebody taking advantage of his student? Definitely gives you tips and hints on how to recognise signs of manipulation, and it actually helps

-Dazai has quite an interesting way of teaching you. He’ll probably suddenly show up at a random time to talk with you, then he’ll disappear afterwards leaving you having no idea what was going on. But slowly, the pieces fall into place and at the end of it, you’d have learned something new as well

-He’d still be his usual self around you; which means talking about su1c1de, women, and just being chaotic. Many times you have to save him from his su1c1de attempts, but it’s often because it was part of his plan for solving a case

-He is also a kind of chill mentor. Dazai won’t lecture you unless it was absolutely necessary. Even then, you still don’t want him to lecture you because he can be scary if he wants to

-Dazai uses any opportunity to turn stuff into a lesson. He’ll do it discreetly though, and it’s so discreet you wouldn’t even notice that it was by his intentions

-He is a bit concerned for your health. Afterall, he knows that having a fragile body could hinder many plans and jeopardize your safety even more. But he asks Kunikida to train you in some basic self-defence that your body could handle

-So Dazai teaches you how to be cunning. More specifically, he teaches you how to outwit the enemy, and how to gather more information than your opponent. His lessons are quite interesting, and more than once his tactics had proven quite helpful to you

-He would give you hard cases that he knows you could handle. Dazai is one to push you past your limits, but he will make backup plans if you somehow couldn’t handle it

-Dazai cares for you in his own Dazai way. Which means that you’ll always have his support; even if you couldn’t notice it, but it’s definitely there. He knows that you can handle yourself, but Dazai will still help you if he thinks you need it

-He would also teach you the tricks to winning an argument. Dazai himself is quite witty and quick-thinking, and he would love to see you be able to win an argument. But please don’t go around starting arguments because you can win them now, even if Dazai finds it amusing

-Dazai would probably open up to you slightly, but his mask is still there. Please tell him that you appreciate him for teaching you and how much you care for him. He isn’t used to any sort of affection and I guarantee you it’ll be a sight to see

-Overall, Dazai is a strange and interesting mentor who actually wants to see you succeed

@sariel626

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd platonic #kenji x reader #yosano x reader #dazai x reader #silverbladexyz's 100 follower event

[mysteriawrites]

Hi lovely, thank you for doing a trade with me! Below is my info, and I’ll request a male match from Genshin Impact, please! If you need anything else let me know.

- Gender: Cis female, she/her

- Zodiac: Aquarius

- Appearance: 5’4, light blonde hair & green eyes. I’m toned/muscular, but still pretty skinny. I have tan skin from living on the coast my entire life, and freckles on my nose and shoulders.

- MTBI: ENFJ-A

- Enneagram: 8w7

- Personality: Confident, outspoken, sociable, logic-driven. High self esteem & self worth, independent. I’ve been told (& I agree) that I speak with a very sharp and blunt tone that comes off rude and sarcastic, even if I’m not trying to be. I try to have a lot of patience, but it often does not work. Flirty, sometimes without realizing, but also just because I really do enjoy attention. Talkative & hyper at times. Physically cannot sit still for more than 20 minutes.

- Likes: Music, dance, writing, modeling, meeting new people, the beach, parties, planning events, learning.

- Dislikes: Complaining (especially when the person is doing nothing to try to fix their problem), people with no regard for those around them, bugs, weird food textures, stubbornness, unnecessary things

- Giving love language: Gifts (usually just small things that I see when I’m out, like their favorite snack at a gas station)

- Receiving love language: Physical touch (Generally, I hate being touched. Cannot stand it. It takes me a long time to get comfortable enough with someone for touching, but when I do I enjoy it. Only at certain times, though, because there will be times I don’t even want to be touched by whoever I’m dating.), Words of affirmation (I get incredibly insecure in relationships, lots of past issues, so fun. Consistent reassurance is definitely needed because I get an attitude)

- Extras: I am a model & my income comes from booking shoots. I have naturally curly hair. If it’s in the arts, I can do it (singing, art, instruments, dance). I have been a dancer and cheerleader since I was 2, so about 18 years. I have PNES & have seizures when I am too stressed out. I go to the gym & work very hard to maintain my image and keep my face and body healthy to maintain modeling

Thanks so much for doing the trade with me. DRUMROLL PLEASE!!!

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

KAEYA!!!

I think you and Kaeya would be a rather interesting couple. He would be able to see past your blunt exterior and see not just a confident, strong, and powerful woman, but also a soft heart that has her own doubts and struggles as well.

No one knows 100% how you and Kaeya met, maybe at a tavern, maybe at a party, who knows. However since then you and Kaeya have had this sort of rivalry going on.

By day you were a beautiful dancer who would perform in taverns and town square of monstadt, but by night you were a vigilante. A masked heroine of the night who tried her best to take care of the crimes and problems of the town that the knights couldn’t.

Every time Kaeya came to take care of a problem around town or catch a criminal you would already have wrapped things up long ago and be on your way out. Every time before you made your escape you would share some flirty banter.

One night you were overviewing the town from the rooftops when you heard footsteps behind you. You whipped around ready to fight off whoever it was, when Kaeya stepped out of the shadows.

You two ended up talking for hours up there until you heard a cry for help down below. Before you took off to go take care of it he asked if you guys could keep meeting up there, and you agreed.

And so every night you two would hang out and talk on the rooftops of Monstadt. Sometimes you guys would talk, sometimes you would have dinner together, and sometimes you two would just sit and silence and watch the stars until there would be a call for help, or if it was a quiet night then it would last till sunrise.

One night Kaeya was waiting for you in your usual spot. Tonight was an odd night because you weren’t there yet. Normally you were always the first one to get there, even when he left early, so the fact that you weren’t here set off red flags. Then he smelled it: smoke.

He took off in the direction of the black clouds to see a house set a blaze in Springvale. He dashed towards the disaster to help in whatever way he could. Amongst the crowd he heard that the famous masked crusader had gone in to save a few people who made it out safely, but the hero had yet to return.

Using his cryo vision Kaeya frantically made he was through the flames in search for you. He had to hurry as the house was falling down around him. Even if he put the fires out it was too much. Just when he was about to give up hope heard small coughs coming from the room in front of him. He dashed for the knob to find you surrounded by a sea of fire and unconscious.

When next you woke up you were in the healing ward of the church, your arms covered in bandages, a patch on your head, a raging headache, but most important at all no mask. In a panic frenzy you tried to remove yourself from the bed when you realized that next to you sat a sleeping Kaeya holding your hand protectively.

He stirred awake at the motion, looked up at you and smiled at the fact that you had awoken. He that after he saved you the nuns had worked tirelessly to save you (smoke inhalation go brrrr) and not to worry about them knowing your identity because he had removed you mask earlier (so you could breathe easier) and didn't tell them your identity.

After you two had reached a moment of silence Kaeya had admitted that he was terrified of losing you. When he found you in the fire barely breathing, he realized that he didn't want to live in a world without you. He said that he wouldn't waste time anymore. He asked you if you would go out with him, and you said yes.

And now you two have a happy playful relationship and are now both officially part of the knights of Favonius saving lives every day.

Sorry this took so long but I hope you like it.

#multi fandom blog #multifandom #multifandom account #multifandom writer #multi fandoms posts #multifandom fanfiction #matchups #multifandom x reader #multifandom imagines #genshin impact #kaeya alberich #kaeya x reader

[pythonmelon]

So I have an eating disorder. Not one related to body image but about fear of illness and food poisoning. My eating disorder may be different than the most well known ones, but it also involves a lot of anxiety and hard work to try and prevent self harm.But, whether its about me disliking my body or not, I still get the "benefits" of having an eating disorder. I've lost a ton of weight, over a third of my body weight has shed off in a little over two years due to anxiety and starvation. I get a lot of positive comments regarding my weight loss. I fit into more clothes. I feel like I look better, even though I had no issue with how I looked before. People ask my secret and I try to be honest about it. Sometimes, though, I catch myself wondering about if this has been ultimately for my benefit, somehow. The idea that being skinny should be some default, that it should be the goal, that it is inherently good is a supremely damaging thing. Its a society wide trend that reinforces bad behaviors in your brain if they get results people like. I'm not bone-thin yet. I don't want to be. I would be fine if I stayed at this weight (and I have! I've been maintaining consistently for a few months and I'm very happy), but I would also be happy being able to put on some weight again. I don't want to be scared of that possibility, because certain people might be disappointed. I was a casual weightlifter in college, before I developed this issue and lost weight. I did a lot of walking and biking. I was pretty darn healthy. I've gotten back in the habit of exercising a lot more recently too, I've been building muscle and it feels nice. But you know what problems I have now that I didn't have before I got an eating disorder and lost a bunch of weight? Semi-frequent migraines from stress and dehydration. Almost constant issues with sudden nausea or stomach cramps or discomfort. Signs that I still don't eat or drink consistently enough.Things are getting better with help and support and effort, but I still backslide at times. And I still catch myself leaning into the idea that somehow this is better, the ideal outcome, to have gotten skinny. That backsliding isn't so bad. I'd still be working out and gaining muscle and living a healthier, happier life now that I live in better conditions and have a somewhat physically demanding job, with or without the weight. None of it was the result of being skinny. What is the result of being skinny is a lot of doubt about how best to care for myself, if getting better is the best idea. This is my own personal experience, but the idea of being skinny as an inherent positive that is constantly advertised, pushed, and praised, and that weight gain is a sign of laziness or sin or whatever, is one that actively prevents healthier life choices and healing.

#Tw eating disorders #Tw weight talk #Personal I guess #I just wanted to get these thoughts off my chest as I look at how much my figure has changed #And how my family keeps encouraging my weight loss #Thank god I live with someone kind and supportive who understands my issues #Healing takes time and I hate that society discourages healing if it makes you gain weight #For the record I went from 230 to 160 its not been Pleasant

[almondbiscotti]

Of Sephora, Skinny Girls and Problems

So I realise I have problems. I mean, this isn't any new realisation, sometimes I branch from having problems to being an actual problem myself hohoho.

So what's my most recent problem?

I recently dropped some dough on Sephora because they're having a sale. Had to make up $150 to get 20% off which honestly, isn't that tough because my stupid face only likes expensive shit. But I only needed to get one thing (a toner) which I was running low on, and it wasn't going to get me to $150. So what did I do? I went to stock up on some other expensive skincare product because, I mean 20% off leh! The auntie in me cannot resist.

Except when I came back home a few hundred dollars poorer, I realise I STILL HAD 2 UNOPENED BOTTLES OF THE DAMN TONER I THOUGHT I WAS RUNNING LOW ON?!

KNS.

Okay, tbf, I love this toner half to death, legit I can give up everything in my skincare routine but not this toner. I would definitely be using it. But that isn't the point. The point is, Sis has storage space issues. REAL ESTATE IS SCARCE I NEED TO CALM DOWN. (I remind myself of this every time I buy new clothes but it's not very effective. I need to find a new way to quit online shopping. Maybe I should call OCBC to report a scam again so they can CANCEL ALL MY CREDIT CARDS AND DELETE MY IBANKING ACCOUNT AGAIN. Hoho, story time for another day.)

In other news, work has been INTENSE. And will continue to be intense for a bit longer. Sleep hasn't been great for me recently and I know it's because work is giving me subconscious stress (maybe a bit from regular Life too). But I'm so grateful for the people that I work with, the partnerships and friendships I have. :) 10 years, it has been 10 frickin years! But mostly good years. And for that I'm really, really thankful. :)

On the personal front, I spent quite a bit of this evening lying on the floor watching Oh My Girl videos and with each video I watched, I felt a bit fatter. It's damn jialat!? But honestly, nothing works like watching a bunch of pretty, skinny Korean girls prance around on stage to keep me from inhaling more garbage food. Is this normal? Is this healthy? Sometimes I wonder how much damage a single person's words has caused me. Then I wonder why I let it damage me like that. Other times I wonder why I dislike bits of me so much but then I still love myself so much. It's strange.

Today, at mass, Father's sermon talked about pride and how it's the sin of the devil. Something about pride being what caused Lucifer to rebel etcetera. And it hit me that I have a lot of pride? But my pride has kept me well and protected over the years. So maybe my pride is an acceptable pride? No, I don't know. I sometimes I think I can be quite a shitty person because I'm so proud. Why like that? I need to examine this part of my character.

I had a beer just now, is that why I'm word vomiting on this internet space? Honestly, does anyone else even keep an online space like this anymore? Literally, nobody I know still writes online. These days, it's just Instagram stories or Tiktoks or whatever the fuck this new Instagram Threads thing is. I'm not saying these things are bad, just that literally nobody I know blogs anymore. Why?

But anyway, if you got to the end of this, Well Done You! I write whenever I am stressed. So I apologise if I make no sense. Stress tends to do that to me. But writing is good, it forces clarity into my head.

Okay, I'm sleepy now. Bye!

#Nessa personal

[lostxndbroken]

FULL NAME: Remus John Lupin NICKNAME/ALIASES: Rem, Moony FACE-CLAIM: Xavier Samuel (young), Lee Pace (older) GENDER: Male AGE: Depends on the thread, but I write him mostly around mid 20′s BIRTHDATE: 10th of March, (original 1960, but depends on the verse) ZODIAC: Picses RACE: Werewolf/Wizard ALIGNMENT: Good SPOKEN LANGUAGES: English

HEIGHT: 5 feet 7 (Lee Pace is taller, but this suits my Remus better) WEIGHT: Between 160 lbs and 170 lbs (depending on his age) BODY TYPE: Slim/Skinny SKIN TONE: Pale POSTURE: Insecure and defensive EYE COLOR: Brown HAIR COLOR: Brown BIRTHMARKS: None TATTOOS: None PIERCINGS: None SCARS: Since the age of five, his collection of scars has been growing - the one on his side belongs to Fenrir Greyback to turn Remus into a werewolf

LIKES: Reading, good food DISLIKES: His affliction (being a werewolf) HOBBIES: to come HABITS: Stops taking proper care of himself around and on the full moon MORAL: Neutral good MOTIVATION: (depends on the thread) DISCOURAGEMENT: The fact that he doesn’t have much of a future CONFIDENT LEVEL: Insecure GREATEST FEAR/PHOBIA: Ending up alone

PARENTS: Hope Lupin (mother), Lyall Lupin (father) SIBLINGS: None OTHER RELATIVES: None PARENTAL INVOLVEMENT: His parents loved him a lot, it was one of the reasons why they wanted to shelter him from the world after he was bitten by Fenrir. Albus Dumbledore convinced them to let Remus go to Hogwarts.

OCCUPATION: Defense against the dark arts teacher, unemployed, Order of the Phoenix member CLOSE FRIENDS: Sirius Black, James Potter RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Gay-sexual ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Gay-romantic PREFERRED EMOTIONAL ROLE: Submissive | Dominant | Switch PREFERRED SEXUAL ROLE: Submissive | Dominant | Switch TURN ON’S: to come TURN OFF’S: to come LOVE LANGUAGE: Remus won’t repeat the ‘I love you’s’ often, simply because he’s afraid of those words. When he says it, he means it. He will show his love and care for taking care of the other with little things. RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES: He tends to walk away before it becomes serious. Afraid that the other won’t be up to the fact that Remus is a werewolf, but he doesn’t want to burden the ones he loves either.

STRENGTHS: His compassion WEAKNESSES: to come PHYSICAL HEALTH: Poor to Okay MENTAL HEALTH: Poor to Okay

He is a very withdrawn person, especially before he got three amazing friends. He just didn’t want to get close to people and lose them if they learned the truth about him. But he couldn’t shake off Sirius, James, and Peter – for some reason, they stuck around and put up with his lies. The young man hates to lie, though – it makes him feel guilty and unworthy.

Remus is also a calm soul in general, unless he is in crowded places – Remus doesn’t feel like he belongs with the humans and the more humans there are around him, the less human he feels. It took the young male a while to realize what the problem was and he tries to work on it. As long as Remus knows that he’s going to mix in sizeable crowds - he can prepare himself and act more normal than when he isn’t prepared.

Yes, he lies to protect himself – but he wouldn’t lie if he doesn’t have to. He defends his friends as much as he can in any kind of situation, life-threatening, detention or just little fights among student - unless it involves bullying, that is something he says out of.

When older – Remus has even a harder time to adjust. He does everything to help out the Order of the Phoenix – but actually getting a job in either the muggle world or the wizarding world is rather tricky with his condition. In the muggle world, Remus is not suitable as he can’t even afford decent new clothes and in the wizarding world, they don’t really trust someone who isn’t entirely human. He tries to come by, by himself – Remus doesn’t want to owe anyone as he knows he can’t pay them back with his way of living. It keeps him in a spiral and yet tries to keep up the cheerful demeanor everyone is used to.

Before the bite: It’s almost painful to imagine seeing Remus differently than he is now – as the condition he carries with him has been there since the age of five. Still, Remus was a different kid before the mark was placed on him.

Young, vibrant, energetic, happy, curious, active and very good at making friends – he always had friends over as long as his parents allowed them. Remus was good at expressing himself for a five-year-old, and you could say he was truly innocent.

Why he was bitten: Lyall didn’t expect that someone could be cruel enough to attack a child, to harm one, kill one – or worse in this matter, curse a child with something that was truly incurable.

But that’s not where it begins – to know the entire story, we have to start at the beginning.

Lyall Lupin, a man who is specialized in dark creatures and he was asked by the Ministry of Magic to explain all about these so-called creatures, in the hope they would understand them better. Lyall was invited to join the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, and he accepted it gratefully.

During his career – Lyall got rid of multiple dark creatures. The Screaming Bogey of Strathtully, a Boggart that had fed on the fears of a large number of local muggles and got as big as an Elephantine with glowing white eyes – Lyall was able to trap it in a matchbox.

In the early 1965’ when Fenrir Greyback was brought to the Ministry of Magic to be questioned about the deaths of two Muggle children – apparently after being caught with a werewolf pack. Fenrir being a werewolf himself but the MoM was uncertain about the condition because they didn’t update the Werewolf Registry often enough to be sure that Fenrir was indeed a werewolf.

Lyall expected Fenrir to be a werewolf – but couldn’t prove it right away. Which is why he suggested keeping Fenrir behind bars until the next full moon (which was twenty-four hours away). The committee laughed at Lyall for such accusations and Mr. Lupin lost his temper. He declared that werewolves are ‘soulless, evil, deserving nothing but death’. Lyall was expelled from the room, and they released Greyback. The Ministry wanted to erase his memory about the questioning – but with the help of two accomplices – Fenrir Greyback escaped.

Fenrir wasn’t going to let Lyall get away with his accusation – he plotted something to get his revenge. Greyback worked himself inside of Remus’s room (shortly before his fifth birthday) and attacked him. Lyall entered the room and saved his son just in time – repelling Fenrir with powerful curses, but Remus was already infected by the werewolf curse.

Being raised with Lycanthropy: Remus’s parents tried all sorts of treatments but in those days – before Damocles’ invented the Wolfsbane Potion, there was nothing that showed any effect. So – they took desperate measures to conceal Remus’s condition. From time to time they had to move away from their homes to find another when the neighbors started to notice the strangeness that the family brought along. Remus wasn’t allowed to play with other children and though he had all the love of his parents – Remus was marked by loneliness.

Eventually, Remus’s parents had found a way to keep the werewolf under control. Lyall locked Remus in a room and cast several silencing charms to make sure no one would hear the beast once turned. Just like every child – Remus grew and so did the werewolf inside of him. By the time he was ten years old – Remus was capable of knocking down doors and breaking the windows during his transformation. Forcing Lyall to use more powerful spells.

Lyall and Hope worried for their son who they love so much. If the Ministry knew about an uncontrolled werewolf – they could react severely and who knew what they would do to the child?

The Lupin’ were afraid that their son wouldn’t be able to join the school of Witchcraft and Wizardry because of his condition. Because of that, Lyall tried to educate his son at home. But before Remus turned eleven – Headmaster Albus Dumbledore came to visit unannounced. The couple tried their best to keep the older wizard out of their homes – but within five minutes Albus was inside. Albus knew about the attack of Fenrir (because Albus had spies planted among the dark creatures – and Fenrir kept boasting of his crime). The Headmaster promised the parents that Remus was in safe hands and that everything was being taken care of so Remus could transform unnoticed during the full moon in a safe environment.

At Hogwarts: Remus was alone – he always felt completely alone, even if he was with others around him. Eventually, he gained three friends and their names were Sirius, James, and Peter. The pair of them weren’t stupid – they started to notice a pattern when Remus wasn’t around when the excuses came to cover his absence. Quickly, they learned that their friend was a werewolf. Remus was afraid that they would leave him – but they did the opposite, they stayed.

The three of them decided to learn a very complicated spell – transfiguration, so they could become Animagi and stay with Remus during his transformations. Once they achieved that – Remus was no longer alone during the full moon and because of them that one time in the month wasn’t as unpleasant as it used to be. Together they created a map that showed the castle grounds and who was roaming around. It was a masterpiece that all of them were very proud of.

A werewolf only hurts humans – which is the reason that Remus’s friends are safe once they have become animals.

Once – his friend Sirius Black pulled a joke on a fellow student, Severus Snape (one who became suspicious of Remus’s behavior and suspected something). It almost cost him his life as Remus could have killed Snape in the worst-case scenario. After – Remus was angry at Sirius for what he had done, he started to realize that maybe his friends weren’t the friends he had hoped them to be. After all – James and Sirius once wished for a full moon, something that would hurt Remus severely. Yet – he couldn’t leave them either, they never left him and when they weren’t selfish - they were actually good people, or so he hopes.

As an adult: Many years passed and his best friend James Potter married a lovely girl he met at school called Lily Evans and the two brought a son to the world named Harry James Potter. Sadly, the parents died when the Secret Keeper gave the information to Voldemort. Peter knew how to play his game and Sirius got the blame for the Potter’s death. Remus believed that for a very long while.

Remus became a teacher at Hogwarts and started to teach Defends against the Dark Arts. Severus gave him one of his foulest glares every time they met. Not only because Remus had the job he wanted so badly, but Severus also didn’t trust Remus as he was very aware of his condition and that he believed he played a big part in the joke that Sirius had pulled on him. Though Severus hated Remus, he gave him the potion around the days that the full moon was going to show, the wolfsbane potion.

With this creation, Remus was able to keep a clear mind while he was turned into a werewolf and he would wait for his transformation out in the Shack. One night he forgot to take his potion, which was the night that Peter was once again found. Remus and Sirius were reunited, and the truth came out that Peter was indeed not dead, that he was the Secret Keeper instead of Sirius and that Peter was the one who betrayed Lily and James, which led to their death. Sadly, that night, Peter managed to escape and joined the Dark Lord once more.

Remus resigned after everything that had happened because he believed that with his condition, he couldn’t keep teaching children the dark arts if their parents were aware of what he was. 

#〘 remus lupin 〙 #〘 head canon: remus lupin 〙 #〘 head canon 〙

[kelsiejayy]

Heya, I hope you’ve had a nice week so far! I looked at your blog and I love the reasoning you’ve put behind your ships so I was wondering if you could do one for me? Im bi btw.

Appearance:

Im 5’8, skinny but only ever wear oversized clothes (cos they are comfy), I have brown eyes plus brown hair and a bump in the bridge of my nose, and I’m pale (I’m 100% Scandinavian), I have grown out bangs and a slightly shaggy hair cut. No tattoos or piercings.

Personality:

I read like their is no tomorrow, read all the classics (from Brontë to Shakespeare), I normally analyse them too - for the fun of it. I'm a very nurturing person and often let my friends stay at mine if they have had an argument with whoever they live with (i get the text/call and I'm ready with mac cheese and cookies plus whatever their movie preference is already present ready). Im in Uni currently but my room is meant for 2 but theres only me in there.

I spent my GCSEs and A-Levels tutoring maths to my friends and others cos maths is hard, lets just be honest. (I live in England and have done since i was a toddler)

Likes:

The colour blue, rain, Metallica, Kiss (who I've seen), Lana del ray, Mitski. Fruit.

Dislikes:

Drugs and Alcohol (I've seen what it does to people and its scary to me), Romeo and Juliet.

anyway hope you have a nice week.

hi thank you for your request sorry for the wait! (i also did get your side note and it was no problem! i did kinda forget what exactly it said so if there was another ship you wanted just send me another ask and i would be happy to redo it!)

STRANGER THINGS: johnathan!

you and johnathan are the kinda quiet couple in the back of a room but everyone knows you guys are just chill and secure. i think you both would have a very stable relationship. you would have probably been friends before you got together so your dynamic just flows naturally. i can see you guys keeping a little cabinet full of everyone's favorite foods so they know they're always welcome to come over. when you guys were in high school i can see you giving johnathan study sessions for free but he would learn absolutely nothing just because he'd be focused on you and not the material. you would scold him for it all the time but he's so whipped he can't help it. overall y'all are just chill and don't have much drama...although i can see johnathan being a romeo and juliet kinda person so you'd have to set him straight there.

i hope you enjoyed! if you have any feedback feel free to let me know i love hearing what y'all think!

if you would like to request a ship they are open as of 6/28

#stranger things request #stranger things fic #stranger things ship #stranger things imagines #stranger things #ships #johnathan byers imagine #johnathan byers ship #johnathan byers x reader

[naniwa-archive]

ViVi November Issue (Snow Man cover)

Solo Q/A interview

Nishihata Daigo

Q. What do you think about sharing clothes with your significant other?

A. Wonderful, absolutely amazing! Since I am not as tall that's why it might be a bit difficult but, I want her to nervously say “this is too big”. I guess it's a nice feeling for your significant other to wearing your own clothes? Well, I am not sure since I don't have any experience in dating (laughs)

Q. Have you actually shared clothes with someone?

A. Only with my father. With members, rather than sharing, we have matching outfits more. Just the other day I copied and wore the same t-shirt as that of Michieda-kun, I also have matching rings, t-shirt and bags with Ohashi-kun. Good things are good afterall.

Q. At what situation with what kind of girl would you like to share clothes?

A. The first thing that came in my mind is, at home date. I want to do classic things, something like, my girlfriend saying “this is a bit big~” while wearing my sweatshirt (shy). If a girl who is usually calm and caring let's herself be spoiled only by me it'll definitely make my heart race. Also since I am from Kansai, I want to joke around with my lover. Is the hurdle too high? Its totally fine even if she can't make a come back (to my jokes). As long she laughs at my jokes!

Q. Can you straightforwardly tell “cute” to your lover?

A. Of course! I can even say things that'd make one feel shy with no problem. That's why on the contrary, if it's someone who isn't good with this kind of thing, it might be a problem. Is this what they call occupational disease?

Onishi Ryusei

Q. What do you think about sharing clothes with your significant other?

A. I completely love the idea. Getting caught by “Isn't it your boyfriend's?”. It looks cute when the girl takes the clothes to wear. I adore conversations that goes “Ah, please lend me that clothes” “Sure~”.

Q. What is good about girls wearing men's clothes?

A. The little loose creates a relaxed vibe. You get to be fashionable even without being too fancy.

Q. Where would you go for date with your girlfriend who is wearing your clothes?

A. Park! I want to go to a park. I have an image that we will be in a relax mode as that of living at home, while eating home made bento we will have a laid-back conversation. We will also bring our dog. Uwaa~ That'd be so nice~.

Q. Would you borrow your girlfriend's clothes?

A. If I were to go out wearing girlfriend's clothes, in case I feel her smell on them, I might get excited (laughs)

Q. Do you have a type you are interested in?

A. Someone who likes to exchange meaningless texts, I guess? If I receive texts with dumb contents at random hours, I might think it as cute.

Q. With which Naniwa member would you like to share clothes with?

A. Ohashi-kun. Because his clothes usually have a calming smell to them (laughs). Also he is quite particular about shoulder width or size in general. He is a fashionable person who has a lot of oversized clothes. I want to wear Ohashi-kun's clothes ♡

Nagao Kento

Q. What do you think about sharing clothes with your significant other?

A. If my girlfriend says “I wanna wear it” then it's completely fine but, I won't recommend her anything by myself. Ah, but if my girlfriend is complimented when wearing my clothes then I'll go “You're welcome”. Since I prefer ladies pants more than the normal ones, if I try then I might also be able to borrow my girlfriend's clothes. As I am a man who has plaid skirt, heel boots and such, I absolutely have nothing that I don't like!

Q. The fashionable Nagao-san, are girls who are into fashion your type?

A. No No, there's nothing like that. If we have common interests and hobbies the conversation might extend, but it's okay even if it doesn't match my taste. Rather, I might apologize for being obsessed with my own fashion while not paying any attention to the other person's clothes  (laughs). At the end, it's all about self satisfaction. As for the significant other, I would like her to cherish her own colors.

Q. Do you talk about clothes with the members?

A. Not really. I talk with my clothes loving friends from my hometown. I also often talk with salespersons of clothing shops with whom I'm close with about release information of new clothes, new brands and such. On top of that, I am the type who doesn't want to match outfits with the members. Yet it troubles me as I would often match with them! If my favourite pair of sneakers matched with anyone then my excitement would go down like “Ah..”. I don't mean this in a negative way. I mean, when you go and hang out with the members if you see someone wearing the same outfit as you, won't it ruin your mood? No matter how close you are! kinda (laughs)

Michieda Shunsuke

Q. What do you think about sharing clothes with your significant other?

A. I think it's really good! The little oversized-ness is cute, also whenever my girlfriend would try to borrow my clothes in my absence I want to tell her things like “What are you doing, geez~”. I want to fool around while feeling all fluffy inside (laughs). Imagining it alone is fun!

Q. Have you actually shared clothes with someone of the opposite sex?

A. As a child I once wore my sister's clothes without her permission, that time she was quite mad at me, so now we no longer share. On the other hand, now when my sister wears my clothes I really can't think of that as cute (laughs).

Q. If you get a girlfriend would you prefer thing to her way or your way?

A. Since I will not hold my partner, if she prefers to wear the things she likes the. I guess I'm fine with it. But if she's not really careful about wearing clothes that are quite revealing then my eyes might have trouble figuring out where to look at! If I receive requests from my significant other like “I want you to wear this kind of clothes” then I'll try my best to respond to her request.

Q. Finally, what is your type?

A. If we are talking about appearance, a girl with natural makeup and bob to semi long hair. As for what's inside (personality), someone who is able to attract elegant people with her soft atmosphere. Also, If I make any mistakes or there is anything wromg in that case I want her to tell that clearly to me. On the other hand, I dislike girls who likes to control. It's fine to act all cutesy to be perceived as cute but as we can't see her true intentions so that's still a bit... Though personally I can't usually recognise such actions at all. Amongst the members, not only is my score low in terms of love, I think I'm quite simple as a person (laughs)

Nishihata and Nagao: Micchi sure is naive!

Takahashi Kyohei

Q. What do you think about girls who wears men's or unisex clothings?

A. It's my first time hearing that girls wear men's clothes! There has been times when I wore slender ladies pants but, there's an opposite pattern as well... Eh, you don't mean room wear, right? Well~ that's something unknown to me (laughs)

Q. What if your girlfriend asks you to lend your clothes?

A. I am sorry but, I wouldn't prefer it. I would constantly think if my clothes have weird smell to it. I'm totally fine with matching though.

Q. What kind of fashion do you like on girls?

A. Something that's pretty in general. Style like, tucked in t-shirt with flare pants, I like outfits that have a refreshing silhouette to them (laughs). Especially flare denims are the best. Previously I used to like skinny pants but, I graduated from them when I became an adult.

Q. What is your ideal personality type?

A. Someone who's funny. Not funny like actual comedians, for example, someone who is really pretty but has a weird laugh, has a strong tone when speaking, if someone who has a gap that you wouldn't think of would really make me interested in them.

Q. What if your significant other requests “I want you to wear this”?

A. If my significant other dresses as per my ideal form then I would do the same. Anything is fine but I don't like showing navel! Even then if there's a request to show muscles, I will say “sure, at the beach” (laughs).

Fujiwara Joichiro

Q. What if your girlfriend asks you to lend your clothes?

A. I'd totally lend them to her. It'll have this “In return lend me something too” kind of feeling (laughs). Doing things like, lining up all the clothes on bed, like how they do in drama and saying things like, “What should I wear today?” “How is this one?” “Ah that's no good” kinda. Isn't that super good? (laughs)

Q. What do you think about girls who wears men's outfits?

A. Normally, when a girl who usually wears ladies outfit wears men's clothes then the form and atmosphere in general will change, right? That change compared to usual will make men's heart flutter. It's the contrast after all, you know? (laughs)

Q. Where would you go for date with your girlfriend who is wearing your clothes?

A. It's a place that is particularly really admired by the people of Kansai but I want to go to a cafe in Yokohama (laughs). We will take pictures there which are different from our usual ones. Later when we will look at the pictures, I want to talk about memories like, “We did it that time. That was the first time when we exchanged clothes!” (shy)

Q. Do you have any ideal type for girls' fashion or make up?

A. Instead of black hair, I prefer girls with dyed hair. Your eyes will follow the girl who has an  intriguing hair color, like “What's up with that color!?” kinda.

Q. What is your ideal personality type?

A. The type who prepares food first, suddenly buys present saying “This looked nice” even though it isn't their partner's birthday. Someone who expresses their kindness casually through surprises, someone like that is nice.

Ohashi Kazuya

Q. If you get a special person, would you share your clothes with them?

A. I really want to do that!  I want to share my closet completely like, “It's fine to wear any of my clothes”. If we are at home, then I'd have her wear my hoodie like an one piece, something like, it's an appearance that only I know about ♡ When going outside though, as I'm worried/concerned, I'd have her wear pants (laughs).

Q. What kind of fashion do you like on girls?

A. Street fashion. Something like a big top with loose wide pants, and a knit cap to along with it! If I spot a girl like that in the middle of the road, then I will follow her with my eyes.

Q. What is your ideal personality type?

A. Someone being with whom would calm me down I guess. If I were to refer to a member then.. Nope, there's no one (laughs). I like slightly modest type of girl who is generally seen wearing glasses while studying in the classroom. Along with that if she's actually really strong in fighting then I might give into her gap.

Q. Have you actually shared clothes with a girl?

A. I have! It's with my almost 50 years old mom though (laughs)

Q. Is it true that you have a lot of clothing items that match with the members?

A. There's a lot. The most is probably with Daigo. Micchi often imitates my hats, with Jo-kun it's the pants, with Kyohei we match rings and down pieces, like t-shirt and such.

Kyohei: It's because Ohashi-kun would invite me to shopping saying “Let's match”

No, it's you who invites me! I am sorry, this kid here is a tsundere (laughs).

#shirolations #なにわ男子 #naniwa danshi #johnny's #西畑大吾 #nishihata daigo #大橋和也 #ohashi kazuya #道枝駿佑 #大西流星 #藤原丈一郎 #高橋恭平 #長尾謙社 #michieda shunsuke #onishi ryusei #fujiwara joichiro #takahashi kyohei #nagao kento #jpop translation #johnny's translation #translation #vivi november #vivi

[moonlit-imagines]

Hi, I'd like to request a ship fandom: cobra kai name: Laura

 sexuality: straight/ assexual (

pronouns: she/her

Relationship: romantic

love language: quality time and cuddles?

physical traits: Brown hair between curly and wavy, voluminous and frizzy just below the shoulder, brown eyes, I'm skinny

I wear braces, and supposedly glasses but I never wear them.

personality: I don't consider myself shy or introverted I just have a certain social anxiety, if they start talking to me I don't know them I can be extroverted. I have problems saying no to someone. I both love and hate being the center of attention. If someone interrupts me while talking I can cry or if someone raises their voice at me.And finally I never sleep before 2 am I always sleep 5 hours a day.

Hobbies: music, ballroom dance, singing in my room, pretending i'm famous in a mirror(is that an hobbie?) ,walking, and eating

likes/dislikes

likes: chocolate, animals,y2k and grunge, summer, clouds, whatch movies and series

dislike- cheese, Winter, horror movie, run, school cafeteria, french, stairs, clean my room, eat (I'll explain later), dark, thunders

important Information: I have ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) which makes me procrastinate a lot, talk too much, have difficulty reading. . Even being Portuguese, I love English and other cultures, tourism and languages ​​in general. I am afraid to trie new foods, I can get panic attacks if I have to eat a thing I have never tried Idk Why, my therapist says It's kinda of an eating disorder. Since I have Adhd I take daily pills, but every rose has its thorns so It takes out my appetite so people gotta be pacient when it comes to eating and trying new food.

sorry If I told too much.

2-personalised headcanons

all good!

i ship you with…

Eli Moskowitz !!!

you two hang out on the beach listening to music together (a tip from one of his senseis)

during thunderstorms, he’ll cuddle you for as long as you need him to or until the storm passes

showing him clothes/aesthetics you like and him telling you just how good he think you’d look in them and even finding clothes to complete your look

5K Shipping Event!

#eating disorder tw #ed tw #confessions of a adhd teen #ask #shipping event #5k event

[prettyterribleimagines]

Class 1-A girls gain weight headcanons please

Uraraka Ochako

She probably is the most likely to gain weight normally to be honest. To save on money she usually eats a lot of junk food, and even with her intense training sometimes it just sticks around for a while. I personally have an hc that Uraraka is normally a little chubby most of the time. She definitely gets her fat spread evenly around her body.

Momo Yaoyorozu

She rapidly gains weight on her vacations, where she stops using her quirk everyday for training. She eats a lot to keep her body fat content high to use her quirk safely, but when she stops using her quirk, that diet makes her put up some weight really fast. She doesn't particularly dislike it, since she knows that will happen so she has some clothes that will fit her like a glove stored in her closet while she waits for work to start again. Her fat normally forms on her belly or back, where she burns fat the most.

Mina Ashido

She is already very not lean on parts of her body, which she is quite proud of! Her arms and legs are particularly fond to her, specially after she started pulling weight and getting more defined muscles. If she gained weight there is only one thing to blame, her cheat week. Her cheat week involves her eating everyday things she wanted to eat while dieting to get more muscles. This wouldn't be a problem normally, everyone needs to have their cheat days, but Mina eats so much everyday of her cheatweek that she gets sick only to repeat the same thing the next day. Between the excessive amount of food she ingests and the medicine to help her bare the pain on her stomach. she does put quite a bit of weight, but she really doesn't care, the fat on her arms and thighs will make her workouts even easier! She does care immensely that she gets sick the next week and can't go to the gym or work.

Tsuyu Asui

She acts differently than all the others when it comes to gaining weight. She plans it very carefully. On one hand, she needs to be very lightweight to be able to maneuver as fast as she can on her patrols or more importantly her rescue missions. But she can't also be too skinny that she doesn't have the muscle to move around quickly and the fat to keep herself warm and energised. She learned first hand what being super skinny feels like, without the body fat her muscles hurt from too much use and she becomes almost dormant when in colder climates. She has a balanced diet that allows her to have the best of both worlds, and that means she changes it up so she can gain extra fat during the winter or fall, so during those months, you can expect her a little chubbier than usual. She normally gets quite a belly going, which annoys her to no end, since she feels way more cold on her arms and speccialy hee legs, needless to say, she is quite envious of how Mina gains weight.

Jirou Kyouka

It's almost impossible for her to gain weight, since she was a child she was always very skinny even when she ate little bags full of candy in an afternoon, so even as an adult, she has quite a lot of trouble gaining weight or even maintaining it. She goes to a nutritionist to know what she should eat to keep herself healthy, since she can't always eat the same type of food over and over again to keep herself ready for hero work. In short, Jirou gaining weight isn't a rare occasion at all, it happens all the time, but it's always barely noticeable.

Toru Hagakure

Toru has trouble knowing when she gains weight, but most of the time she prefers being "overweight" just to help her in using her hero costume during winter (Toru and Tsuyu like to trade diets during the colder months). If she lets you in on how her body is at those times, she will tell you that she gains quite a bit of fat on her thighs more do than her belly. At least she thinks so, she never saw any of them at that stage to confirm.

#bnha #my hero academia #imagines #hcs #headcanons #uraraka ochaco #tsuyu asui #sfw #momo yaoyorozu #jirou kyouka #ashido mina #toru hagakure

[solo-net]

3, 8, 11, 14, 19, 23, 24, 27 for whatever ship you want <3

3. Who hogs the cover/ Who loves to cuddle?

Vera is the blanket thief. Goro is the cuddler.

For Goro, sharing the bed with Vera means sleeping on constant high alert. He’s never able to settle too deeply into sleep before he’s abruptly thrust out of the warm cocoon that is his blanket. It’s jarring and, to be honest, a little irritating to watch the one he loves transform from a thoughtful and unselfish person into a megalomaniac, drunk on her ability to hoard comforters. 

Now, Vera doesn’t know what she’s doing. How can she? She’s a deep sleeper and can sleep through a sand storm without so much as a twitch. So, instead of waking her, Goro will settle for wrapping his arms around her small frame and holding her so that they’re both sharing the same blanket and to prevent her from snatching it off of him.

8. Who sleeps in their underwear (or naked)/ Who sleeps in their pajamas?

Vera and Goro don’t sleep completely naked, but neither do they sleep fully clothed.

Vera sleeps in only a thin tank top and panties because they’re more comfortable to move around in and because she doesn’t feel constricted. Goro sleeps shirtless and wears pajama pants to bed with his hair down. Secretly, Goro loves it when she sleeps half-naked because it gives him an excuse to gently run his hand up and down her bare hip whenever he’s sitting up in bed reading a book, and she’s laid out beside him half-asleep. 

11. Who likes horror movies/ Who likes romance movies?

That’s a tricky question.

Vera’s not the type to watch romance movies because she finds them dramatic and ridiculous. Life is not a fairytale, and she’ll be damned if she wastes an hour of her life watching The Notebook. Even Goro has a mild dislike for romance movies because he simply does not have the patience for the main characters or the ridiculous plot. Horror movies are also not their speed, but Vera does have a soft spot for zombie movies...just to sit and criticize the survivors for their poor planning skills and looking like they just came out of the fashion magazine after a month in the woods. Oh, and if Goro were to pick out a Japanese horror movie, she would flat out refuse to watch it. Japanese horror is scary and gory and will keep her up at night.

14. Who kills the spiders?

Goro.

Vera has bad arachnophobia and will refuse to enter a room if there’s a spider on the wall. Goro doesn’t mind killing them for her, and he finds it a little endearing whenever she tugs at his arm near tears and begging him to kill it. He could be driving around the city running errands, and she would send him frantic texts about the spider in the bathroom, yelling at him to come home already so that she can use the bathroom in peace without the eight-legged freak staring at her.

19. Who loves to call the other one cute names?

Pet names aren’t their thing. Goro is a little too reserved to give her a nickname, and saying her full name is as close to a term of endearment as he can get because very few people know her full name. Vera doesn’t think nicknames like “babe” or “hun” really fit him, so, like Goro, she calls him by his first name. 

Sometimes in a moment of tenderness, Goro will refer to her as “dearest.”

23. Who asks who out on the first date?

Surprisingly, it was Goro who asked Vera out, and he was the one who pursued her romantically. What started as an innocent crush he felt towards the quiet nomad grew into something more profound, and it wasn’t until after she came back to save his life did he realize how he was beginning to feel more than attached to her.  They both kept their feelings to themselves because they weren’t too sure if such a relationship would even work out, but Goro was eager to try, and they began a subtle courtship that slowly bloomed into something wonderful.

24. Who is the talker/ Who is the listener?

Goro is the talker, and Vera is the listener. Crazy, right?

Goro may be reserved, but he doesn’t have the personality of an ice cube, and gameplay shows that he’s a passionate man who’s not afraid to say what’s on his mind. Vera is just as fiery, but she’s reticent and will only become more outspoken around friends and family. Whenever Goro is frustrated by something, like the food in Night City, he’ll go on a long rant in his native language about how everything tastes like plastic. Vera will just sit there swinging her skinny legs back and forth, patiently listening to him and waiting until he’s finished before calmly asking him if he’d like some of Mama Welle’s chili, to which he’ll grumpily reply, “Yes.” 

Oh, and bringing up Yorinobu is forbidden. Even saying his name will set Goro off on a two-hour tirade as to how dishonorable and traitorous Yorinobu is. Don’t get me wrong, they communicate daily and take turns listening to each other, but Goro is the talker.

27. Who takes a long shower/ Who sings in the shower?

Vera is the shower hog.

Her shower is a hair salon and the place where she’ll spend hours standing under the nozzle thinking about her life choices. That all came to a screeching halt when Goro became her roommate. While being a shower hog certainly isn`t criminal, it can be a big problem for the man living with her. Having been roommates with Jackie, Vera can understand Goro’s frustration when he has to remind her that occasionally he would like to shower and shave and wash his hair. Being a reasonable person, she is perfectly willing to let him have his share of shower time-as long as it doesn`t infringe on hers.

Vera can’t help that she’s greedy about her bathroom time, and she`ll be the first one to admit it. That`s because she spent the more significant part of her life living with the Welles family and sharing a bathroom with Jackie. Now there`s a bloody situation. Put a large mercenary street-kid and a tiny nomad sharing one bathroom, and you`ve got the perfect scene for a murder. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times those two fools nearly disowned each other because one of them used up all the hot water in the shower.

Each morning Vera would quietly sneak out of the room she shared with Jackie and tiptoe to the bathroom toting her little purple bucket full of vital shower supplies praying that he wouldn’t get up and decide to take a piss while she washed her hair. So, yeah, Vera is the shower hog, but after a long discussion about conserving water, she and Goro both agreed to start taking showers together. Everybody wins.

Also, there is no singing in the shower. Both Vera and Goro loathe singing in the shower. A shower is a place of silent tranquility and relaxation. There is no fucking singing.

@dedevilish

#( .vera x takemura. ) #otp: two souls indivisible #GURL THIS WAS SO MUCH FUN! #but seriously those two act like a married couple #long post #I have sooo many headcanons about them and their couple dynamics

[pretchatta]

@cameoamalthea made a post about Bo-Katan and I have Many Thoughts, but for ease of reading I’ve put my response here under the read more! (warning: spoilers for the whole of season 2 of The Mandalorian)

Why Ahsoka still supports Bo-Katan is a GREAT question (that I actually started thinking about earlier today), but first, I want to talk about the rest of Bo's past - she is NOT a good person. She's definitely a Yasha Greyjoy, believing in the conquering, predatory supremacy of the Mandalorians, and something I'm exploring in a fic series I'm currently writing is how she came to be that way.

I think it was mentioned somewhere that Satine's father was Duke of Mandalore before she was Duchess, and it was him who started the pacifist New Mandalorian government. I don't know if this is a hereditary-monarchy kinda situation or more democratic, but my interpretation is "there are sort of royal families and even though there technically are elections, it's always Clan Kryze or Vizsla or similar who get elected". My headcanon is that Satine was the eldest child and so groomed to take the throne, while Bo was sort of pushed to the side in very typical second-child fashion. So she grew up with a fair amount of internalised resentment towards her family, and then at some point fell in with some more traditional Mandalorians, and from there it was all too easy to oppose her father and sister and everything they stood for.

So, she believes Mandalorians are top-of-the-food-chain warriors, and that it's perfectly okay to burn villages, kill helpless people, and smack the butt of any skinny torgruta kid who shows up unannounced. She's a Bad Person. She’s also so committed to this ideology that she’s willing to team up with a former Sith and a bunch of criminals to get what she wants. But then Maul kills Vizsla, and declares himself leader of Death Watch and Mandalore, and this is her limit - as you said, not because he's bad, but because he's not Mandalorian. (It was at this point that I, as an audience member, really started to like her - the cool female lieutennant is standing up to a bad guy! And it's for a reason that isn't "this is morally wrong and I have developed a conscience"! I love that, because after a while that does get a bit boring.) So now she's fighting Maul, and we know the Jedi are also fighting Maul, so it makes perfect sense for them to team up against their common enemy who is far stronger than each of them.

I then think that during the Siege of Mandalore she has a bit of an internal crisis. Before, when the Shadow Collective were pretending to invade so Death Watch could save the day, yes there were Mandalorians being hurt, but it was all under control, it was just a pretend invasion, after all. Now, however, everything is much more real - the war is now on Mandalore, her home, and it's hurting her people, and there's nothing she can do to stop it without more fighting. It's actually partly her fault, because she was part of Death Watch, and they set this whole thing in motion. So she then sees Ahsoka, who is committed to peace, take out Maul with no casualties (up until this point, most if not all of the Maul fights she's seen either involve decapitation or lots of explosions - if she'd tried to take him, a lot of people would have died in the fight, both soldiers and innocents). She's also been part of the desperate fighting in the streets, and I think she's finally starting to realise that maybe Satine was right - their people can't take much more of this, because they're going to destroy themselves. Maybe they should think about less combative ways to rule themselves? She says “I wish I was good at something other than war” and then “My sister tried that. I never understood her idealism” and I always thought there was an unsaid “until now” at the end of that second one - she wants to be what Mandalore needs, and she’s realising that might not be a warrior.

But for now, they need to get through this, and that means fighting off the crime syndicates that are literally in their streets, that means accepting the help of the Republic and its soldiers, and it eventually means Bo-Katan herself taking up the position of ruler of Mandalore. We know that doesn’t last long, because Saxon and the Empire rise up to take it from her, but then Sabine finds the Darksaber and unifies the clans. Bo says “I had my chance to rule, and I failed. I am not my sister. I am not the leader you seek” - she’s definitely done some reflecting on maybe-Satine-was-right-after-all, and starting to realise how badly she’s messed up. But as you say, Sabine and the other clans push her into accepting the Darksaber and the throne.

Now I (finally) come to Ahsoka. Ahsoka saw Death Watch Bo - she directly saw her burning the village, and she also saw the effects Death Watch’s attempts at taking over had on Mandalore when she went to help weed out corruption in Sundari. Yes, a lot of it was due to the war, but a lot of those problems were definitely exacerbated by Death Watch’s actions and presence. Ahsoka then teamed up with her to fight Maul - ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend’ - and on my first watch I didn’t think much of her saying “I’ve learned from the best, including you.” I was too busy thinking “yeah, Bo-Katan IS the best!” but on my second watch - why does Ahsoka think she’s ‘the best’? Did she see something that we, the audience, did not? The Clone Wars didn’t show us any scenes with just Ahsoka and Bo before the fighting started - perhaps they had a conversation where Ahsoka confronted Bo about the terrible things in her past, and Bo explained that she was misguided and regretted it and was trying to do what was best for her people now. That would make sense.

Because then, in The Mandalorian, Bo directs Din to Ahsoka (edit: and she does it very specifically, too - usually in Star Wars you get a system, maybe a planet, but Bo knows the exact city). Why would she even know where Ahsoka is? They didn’t interact in the Rebels arc. From what we see of Ahsoka, Tython Corvus isn’t even her permanent residence, she’s just there to help one village tiny city and get information out of someone. So why does Bo have very recent information on her location? The only answer is that they must be allies who share that information willingly. And since the character of Ahsoka is Good, her allies must also be - unless they’ve made another temporary arrangement to team up and defeat a common enemy. But Bo is hunting Gideon and Ahsoka is hunting Thrawn (I am unbelievably excited) so they’re apparently on different quests. Which means... they must be friends.

In the episode The Heiress, Bo acts pretty okay. Yeah, she calls Din’s way of life a cult and is kinda rude about it, but it’s in response to him literally telling her she’s not a Mandalorian as, like, the first thing he says to her, and there are a lot of people out there who are rude and dismissive of someone’s way of life/upbringing without being Inherently Evil and Bad. Her motivations in that episode are: save a fellow Mandalorian, who might also be able to help her find and fight Gideon, and find and fight Gideon. She’s not interested in helping Din on his side-quest to reunite a child with his people - she feels the struggle for Mandalore is more important than one child. 

In the episode The Rescue, however, she definitely goes out of her way to insult Boba and Jango completely unneccessary. Maybe she has a valid reason to dislike clones? I don’t think it would have anything to do with the Republic/Empire’s takeover of Mandalore - that wasn’t the clones’ fault*. She asked for Republic help, and then it was Palpatine and Saxon who kept them there. However, other than that, I don’t think she did much wrong? She still has the single-minded determination to duel Gideon and retake the Darksaber, which she might feel a need to do this time around because she has to prove - to herself, to Mandalore, to everyone - that she’s worthy of it. But for her, even though she’s accepted that maybe pacifism is okay, Mandalore is still pretty high up on her priority list, so it comes ahead of Din, Grogu and the New Republic.

So future seasons have a lot to answer for:

Why is Ahsoka willingly allied with Bo-Katan, given that Bo has never done anything objectively good/anything that wasn’t motivated by a need to see Mandalore ruled by Mandalorians wearing beskar?

Why does Bo hate the Fetts so much?

How will Bo handle Din having possession of the Darksaber now?

(edit: the below was added after posting)

* Why I don’t think it’s the clones’ fault: Bo knew what she was doing when she invited the Republic to help her retake Mandalore. Obi-Wan specifically asked her about it, and she said she would deal with it later. She knew that by using Republic gunships and clones the Senate would take an interest in Mandalore, and it would be seen as Mandalore allying itself with the Republic. When the Republic then became the Empire, the clones would either have simply continued serving the Senate - formerly Republic, now Imperial - or been decommissioned, in which case the Senate would have sent an alternative force to represent its interests. Unless there’s a specific mention of this in canon that I’m missing, the clones would only have been following orders from the Senate, and that would have been very clear to the Mandalorians. Any betrayal of Mandalore came from the Empire not leaving after Maul was defeated, not the clones spontaneously deciding that now the Republic was gone, they’re free men, they can choose between Mandalore and the Empire, and they choose the Empire.

Bo specifically has it out for Jango and Boba for some reason. I think she knows who Boba is, and that he’s not just any clone - I’ve seen several posts on this but the most obvious is that Boba was a pretty high-profile bounty hunter in the OT who she must have heard of. I think it’s something around how she percieves Jango’s Mandalorian-ness, his status as Boba’s father and the process of cloning in general, and therefore Boba’s claim to any Mandalorian armour, heritage and identity.

#bo katan kryze #the mandalorian #mando spoiler #cameoamalthea #tcw #rebels #coraposting

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #414

“mirror, mirror, tell me who you see  /  am i you or me?  /  i can never remember”

How many people have you kissed? Four. Ever kissed someone you weren’t dating at the time? No. Of the people you’ve kissed, how many do you regret kissing? Two. Ever been kissed by a legal adult when you were a minor (or vise-versa)? Yeah, with Jason, but it was only a two-year difference. Ever kissed someone on a dare/as part of a game? No. Where’s the most public place you’ve ever made out with someone? Nowhere public. I wouldn't do that. Can you snowboard? Never tried. Have you ever made a mixed cd for someone? No. Do you use recycle bins at your house? Yes. Do you own more than one bathing suit? No. Have you ever kissed someone who smokes weed? Jason did occasionally with his best friend, but he stopped for me. How are you right this second? I'm all right. Last night was pretty rough, so I'm just glad that's over. My body is just tired. Is there anything you disliked about your last birthday? Honestly, I barely remember what I did on my last birthday. I just remember it was fine. Oh wait, actually, on the way home from going out to eat, we had to call the cops while behind a car whose driver was obviously drunk or high OFF. HIS. ASS. He was swerving like crazy and almost hit SO many cars. I was having an absolute panic attack. I pray to God that guy was more than just found and fined. Do you keep a diary or journal (offline or online)? No, unless you count surveys, I guess. What were you like a year ago? I was the unhappily the same. Is someone on your mind right now? Fucking always. Having a warm dream about him last night didn't help. Who was the last person you sat next to? My mom. What do you currently hear right now? My screen is split so I can watch John Wolfe play some indie horror games. What’s something you need to go shopping for? I need to get new bras baaaadly because I'm tired of none fitting properly. What’s the last thing you ate? I had a donut 'cuz Mom stopped at Dunkin' for coffee. Do/did you do good in school? I did up to college. Then I just... sucked. Do you always get along with your siblings? I mean I don't see/talk to them every day or anything, not even very regularly even, but we generally get along fine now as adults. We disagree about shit for sure, but keep our mouths shut. Or probably talk to Mom about it while I'm not present. I don't even think they like me half of the time. Are you frustrated with anything? So much. Why did you fall for the last person romantically? There were/are a lot of factors. Just she as a person is phenomenal. What’s your younger sibling’s name? Nicole. Can you speak in a different language conversationally; if so, which language? A tiny bit of German. Do you ever fear of falling asleep? With my nightmares, I used to dread it. Now, thankfully, my APAP mask has prevented them from happening, mostly; I've only had two in the month that I've had it, and I ordinarily had them every single night. Do you have an idea of what kind of profession you’d like to have? I do, but I honestly doubt I'm going to succeed in even making it a part-time job by this damn point. Which beach would you say is your favorite? I don't have a favorite. I don't even like the beach very much. What kind of cookie is your favorite? Chocolate chip. Have you ever had a churro? Yes. Too crunchy and ridiculously sweet, not a fan. Truth be told, are you more into looks or personalities the most? A good personality beats good looks any day. How is/was your chemistry class in high school? I actually didn't take chemistry; my graduating year, physical science was offered as the alternative, which I took. How does alcohol affect you? I get hot, and my face flushes badly. It'll make me more talkative. Have you ever tried lemon brownies? No, and I don't want to. I don't like lemon-flavored stuff like that. What was the last type of meat you ate? Beef. Have you taken any medication today? I have prescriptions I take every day. Have you ever watched Parks and Recreation? I've seen some of it at Sara's house. What is your favourite kind of pasta? Just spaghetti with tomato sauce and meatballs, really. I've been on a major chicken pesto kick lately, though. Have you set an alarm today? No. Think of a random person, and give them a message here, no names: Literally just the chance to say "I'm sorry" would be fucking amazing. Just two fucking words. What if there were two of you? Would the world be in trouble? No. That'd be a waste of space, though. Not like I'm contributing much to society. Would you prefer an ice cream sundae or an ice cream cone? I dunno man, it depends on my mood and what I want in the moment. Do you watch movies with the subtitles on? No; I find it to be distracting. Is the last person you kissed yours? I hate this saying. She's her own person that belongs to nobody but herself. But to just go along with it and answer the question, no, we're not together. Do you think you will be married by the time you are 25? Welp, I'm halfway through 25, so. Do you have siblings over the age of 21? All of my siblings are. Do you have a hard time admitting you’re wrong? No. Especially as I've aged, I'd say I'm pretty quick to accept if I've fucked up. Who has the ability to hurt you the most emotionally? Jason will probably always have that power, even if he's not in my life. Would you ever be a stripper? God no, nobody wants to see that. What are your plans for tomorrow? Just get through the day, man. Do you owe anybody money? No. How would your parents describe you? Reserved, shy, a deep thinker, animal lover, uhhhh... What is the most you have ever weighed? Let's not. Would you ever work at McDonald's? No. I'm never working in food service. If you aren't already, would you go vegetarian or vegan? I want to be a vegetarian and being a vegan would be perfectly ideal for me, but I really don't think I can healthily accomplish either. I am FAR too picky to where I'd almost definitely become malnourished. To make it even worse I absolutely cannot "suck it up" if I don't like a food, so it's not like I could choke down stuff I don't like. Not to mention I'd be pretty sad without any yummy food to look forward to, aha. Coolest person you've ever met? Uhhhh I don't know. Do you wear boxers? No. Girls, how old were you when you first learned how to put in a tampon? I don't remember. Would you ever attend a gay pride parade or festival? I would absolutely love to. Did you see Paranormal Activity 2? I think I've seen all of the movies. I liked them, given paranormal horror films are probably my fave. What would you do if an old man grabbed your ass? Kick him in the fucking balls so goddamn fast and probably slap him across the face at the same time. Probably cry later from feeling violated and having my fear of men aggravated. Do you like moustaches? It depends on the person, but I'd say I generally prefer an attached beard and a mustache versus JUST a mustache. Could you hack into someone's computer if you tried hard enough? No. I have no idea how to do that. Have you ever smoked a cigar? No. Do you go out on Black Friday? Hell no. NOT worth fighting people for deals. Do you have curtains in your bedroom? No; I have those blinds that you can close upwards or downwards. Did you like the Spice Girls when you were little? Yeah, I did. Can you sing the entire Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song? I think I can. Do you get heartburn? I'm literally on an antacid prescription, or else I get insane heartburn every day. Are you scared of elevators? To a moderate degree, yes. I'm terrified of it getting stuck. Have you ever seen a dead body in person? Yes, at an open-casket wake. Have you ever seen The Goonies? I have. If you're white, do you ever wish you were black? Or vice versa? I'm fine being Caucasian, but ultimately don't care. Do you bake cookies all the time around Christmas? I don't bake. Do you like your hair pulled? Uhhh... I'm assuming you mean this in a suggestive context, in which case no. Never pull my hair, actually. What kind of jeans do you like? Ripped skinny jeans. What do you think is overrated? Who really cares. Let people enjoy what they enjoy. And what are your goals for the remainder of this year? Lose lots of weight, find a job, get back into old hobbies and develop new ones... Name a city that starts with A in your state/province etc. Asheboro. Name a landmark that starts with M in your state/province etc. I'm blanking right now. When was the last time you gave a horse a carrot? Been years. I think I've only done that once, and I can't even remember where it was. Have you ever had to shovel snow? No. How many seasons is your favorite TV show in so far? MM was just revived for its fifth season! :') Where would you most like to go in your state, etc. that you haven’t been? NC actually has this really old Wizard of Oz theme park! It's on the other end of the state, though, and NC is one wiiiiiide state. What was the last bird you saw? A robin, I think. What color was the last thing you drank? Green. Has a wild animal ever been loose in your house? Besides insects, no. Well wait, scratch that, once or twice we had a small mice problem when we lived in the woods. What’s the name of the bookstores in your city? The only one I know off the top of my head is Books-a-Million. Where do your parents live? I live with my mom, and Dad lives in the same city as us. Have you ever seen or touched an iceberg? No, but that would be cool. What colour are your father’s eyes? Brown. If your ex turned up on your doorstep now, with nowhere else to go, would you let him/her stay? Well one, this isn't my house, so I can't make that decision. My mom being who she is though, she'd let pretty much anyone stay the night. If it was Sara, Mom would let her stay as long as she needed. The last time you cried, was it connected with someone of the opposite sex? Ugh, yes. My PTSD was BAD last night. Delicious warm brownies or a giant cookie? I'll take the brownie. Have you visited a haunted building or area before? No, but damn I'd love to. Have you been to North Carolina? Ayyyyeeeee that's my home.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''disguise'' by motionless in white

[starlightinhumanform]

Midas

Fandom: Sanders Sides 

Ship: Romantic Loceit, Background Platonic Logincality

Summary: Greek myth tells of King Midas who could turn anything he touched to gold. Damian hates New Years but when his friends drag him to a party, he meets a man makes everything around him just a little better.

Warnings (in order of strength): A lot of drinking/alcohol mentions/partying (none underage), Mild language throughout, (please tell me if anything needs to be added)

Genre: Fluff, Mild Angst with a happy ending, Human (college) AU 

A/N: Deceit’s name is Damian in this fic :) ALSO I know there’s quite a few younger kids in this fandom and if you’re reading this (first of all, hi I love you) please please PLEASE do not take this fic as an inspiration to abuse alcohol. Underaged drinking/partying can be extremely dangerous. Ok enough being serious!! I hope you enjoy! Love you all 🖤✨

Ao3 Link    Fic Masterpost    Fic Request Info

Damian wasn’t a fan of New Years. It shouldn’t mean anything- he knew that. It was just another random day; the fact that people liked to put special significance on it didn’t actually do anything.

But all the talk of new times got into his head, made him think. It made him think about how many things had changed- the friends he had lost, the goals he had once held dear now thrown away. It made him think about how little he had grown- the bitterness he held onto, the stagnation that had settled across him. He was in his third year of grad-school; soon he would be shoved out into the real world with no academic purpose to shelter him.

“New Year, New Me.” Damian didn’t even know who he was.

If there was one thing he hated more than New Years, it was New Years parties. He would go so far as to say the things were the bane of his existence. The music was bad, people got loud and overly exuberant, and strobe lights were used were used far more than ever reasonable. Alcohol always floated around with disturbing prevalence. He hated how fuzzy it made his head- throwing off his balance and slowing his thoughts- but at least it made the party easier to handle.

Damian threw back a shot of cheap, bight blue tequila and winced as it hit the back of his throat. Disgusting. Just because he was trying to get drunk didn’t mean he lacked class.

He set the glass down on a table behind him so he could pretend he hadn’t touched the repulsive thing. He was sitting on a sofa tucked against the back corner of a living room in a house he had never been to before. Next to him, someone was already passed out. They would be starting their new year with a killer hangover.

Across the room, he could see the friends who had dragged him to the houseparty. Roman and Patton were dancing in a crowd of other students, broad grins painted across both of their faces. At least they were happy.

A young man weaved his way through the crowd and threw himself onto the sofa next to Damian with a mixture of disdain and defeat. Damian had seen him around a few times; they had a philosophy class together the last semester. What was his name? Lucas? Landon? Bradon?

“Hey,” Lu-nd-on elbowed him in the side, “You want some champagne?”

Damian raised an eyebrow as he turned to face the man, “Excuse me?”

He pulled a bottle of champagne from somewhere in his coat. The gold foil at the top was already ripped away and he popped the cork off with ease, taking a swig before offering it.

Damian tried not to stare incredulously, but it was a difficult task when his brain was short-circuiting, “Did you just drink out of a champagne bottle like it was a beer?”

“Sure. Why not.”

Damian reached out hesitantly to take the bottle. He was beginning to doubt that this actually was the guy he had shared a class with. That one looked like the type who wouldn’t have been caught dead at a party. The only similarity was the way they dressed- round wireframe glasses, a corduroy jacket over a black button down, and black skinny jeans. His hair- dark brown and pulled into a long ponytail- was the same too.

“Did- did we have a class together?” He took a drink. It was good- expensively good.

“Historical philosophy. You probably don’t remember me- my name’s Logan. You’re Damian, right?”

“Yep. I hear I’m kind of hard to forget,” Damian waved his hand at the dark red birthmark that stretched messily across the left side of his face.

“No. Well, yes. That is, I remember you for a different reason.”

Logan stared at him like he was supposed to understand what that meant. Damian stared back, hoping to convey the fact that he, in no way, understood what was going on.

“So, uh,” Damian searched for something to keep the conversation going, “can I ask about the champagne?”

“You’re asking why I have it?”

Damian nodded, “I am, yeah. Also why you pulled it out of your jacket?”

“As for the first question: people seem to have made a tradition out of getting wasted on New Years Eve and I decided to join them this year.”

Damian had never heard someone speak so matter of factly about getting drunk. He shook his head, laughing, “So you bought an entire bottle of champagne? There are easier methods, you know that right?”

“If you’re referring to the blue monstrosity everyone keeps offering, please know that I’m not a heathen.”

“Oh, so you tried one of those awful things too?”

Logan rolled his eyes with a ruthful smile, “I may have made that mistake.”

Damian handed the bottle back to Logan who took another drink before locking his gaze on Damian’s eyes. He stared like there was a problem in them and he just couldn’t figure out how to solve it. Damian was used to people staring, but not like this. Usually, they would take one look at him and their eyes would glaze over. Whatever the conversation might be, they would always be partially focused on the splatters some god had painted on his face long before he had a say in the matter. It wasn’t that Damian disliked his birthmark. He just hated the way people always saw it instead of him.

But Logan. He was looking at him. Into him, through him. He had no idea what to do with that.

Damian laughed nervously, “What are you looking at?”

Logan cleared his throat and stared out into the crowd, “Anyways I had it in my jacket because these people are all animals and I’d prefer they didn’t rob me of my 35 dollar champagne.”

Logan had handed him the bottle back and Damian choked on the mouthful he had been trying to drink, “I’m sorry, what? So let me get this right: you bought a champagne bottle which is worth more than I usually spend on food for a week. And now you are sharing it with me of all people?”

“Why not you of all people?”

Logan was staring at him again like answers to all of these riddles were obvious.

Damian blinked back, feeling more lost than he had in years. Even that stupid Advanced Geometry course he had decided to take in his freshman year hadn’t screwed him over this badly. Maybe the alcohol was finally getting to him. It would explain why he couldn’t hold a single coherent thought and why he was so hypnotized by the pale freckles that dusted Logan’s nose and cheekbones. They were so light they nearly melted into his skin and seemed to be phasing in and out off existence as the dim lighting played against Logan’s face. He had never noticed them before. Then again, he had never gotten this close before. It was a shame; Logan was mesmerizing. Damian wished he could get closer.

“So what are you going to do after we get out of here?”

It took Damian a moment to realize Logan was asking about a career and not what he would be doing after the party once they left- apparently together. That would have been strange; it was weird his brain even jumped to that conclusion.  Maybe he should stop drinking that damn champagne.

He sighed as his mind returned to the actual question. He wanted to make something up, hide behind a lie of certainty and determination. But it was too much work to weave that fabrication together. Especially on the spot. Especially with how his head was feeling. Especially in front of Logan. He hung his head, “Honestly I have no clue. I’ve always been interested in social sciences but beyond that... no plan, no clue.”

A beat of silence played out between them.  

“So what about you?” The forced brightness in his voice tasted fake and bitter in his mouth.

“I want to teach sciences,” Logan’s eyes glittered.

“A college professor, huh? I could definitely see it,” Logan handed him the bottle and Damian threw yet another swallow back. Didn’t he say he was going to stop?

“High school level, actually.”

“Really? That doesn’t seem-“ Damian pointed at the champagne bottle in an attempt to remind Logan of what a bougie, extra bitch he was, “ -sophisticated enough for you.”

Logan shrugged, “I kind of have a fascination with high schoolers-“

“Ok, that’s creepy.”

“Not like that! I mean the culture, the slang, the way it’s its own little society interacting within a larger one!” Logan’s face had split into a grin as he talked, waving his hands excitedly.

Damian didn’t even resist urge to smile back. Seeing Logan like this, well, there was something contagious about it. He couldn’t help but feel slightly in awe of the passion he saw in Logan, “You really like this stuff, don’t you?”

Logan nodded vigorously, “Do you know the new word high schoolers today have invented and are using?”

“Hmm?” Damian prompted. Anything to keep Logan talking like this. Damian wasn’t sure why he wanted to keep Logan talking. It had something to do with the way warmth was spreading out from his core in a way that was far gentler than anything drinks could do.

“Yeet.”

In the adjoining room Damian could see two groups standing on opposite tables chanting “Yeet, Yeet, Yeet, Yeet” as they tossed a smaller student (who looked like they were having the time of their life) back and forth.

“Uhh, I think college kids use that too,” Damian didn’t want to burst Logan’s bubble but he felt like he was losing his mind. At any moment he was going to start cackling.

Logan paused, giving him a pointed stare, “Maybe you do.”

Damian broke. He collapsed forward, glad he had handed the bottle back as he wrapped his arms around his shaking body. He could hardly breathe but he couldn’t stop laughing either. His head was light and buzzing warmly. It wasn’t necessarily a bad feeling, but as tears started streaming out of his eyes, he knew he was officially drunk. Who gave a shit? That had been his goal, right?

He fell all the way down, letting his head land on Logan’s knee. He still couldn’t stop laughing even though it had developed solely into wheezes at that point.

Damian felt a hesitant hand tap on his back before actually settling there, “Are you ok?”

Damian sat up and wiped away the tears that had gathered at the corners of his eyes, “Bro, you’re so judgmental.”

Logan’s face shifted from concern into a scowl, “Oh. Sorry.”

The heavy bass of whatever song was playing took over the space between them. Damian kept thinking about destroying that gap. All he would have to do would be lean over, rest himself against Logan, maybe fall asleep. Maybe it was the overpriced buzz in his head talking, but he felt safe around Logan.

Out of the blue, Logan stood up, adjusting the hem of his jacket as he turned to face Damian, “Well, I won’t be bothering you anymore. Maybe I’ll see you around campus sometime. You can finish that if you want.”

Damian looked down by his feet where Logan was pointing to the champagne bottle, “Wait, I don’t understand. You’re leaving? Where?”

Logan glanced around, looking anywhere but Damian’s face. Damian was used to that but this felt different. Logan was different. At least under usual circumstances, he knew why people so adamantly refused to acknowledge his existence. He made them uncomfortable; he didn’t like it, but he got it. Here, he was absolutely clueless.

Logan finally managed to make eye contact. He was trying for a smile but as an expert liar, Damian could see straight through to the grimace beneath, “Oh, I’m sure I’ll find someone else who will tolerate my presence for a few moments.”

“Hey,” Damian acted on impulse. After all, Logan’s hand was just hanging there. It was far too empty. And at the moment, reaching forward to grab Logan’s wrist was Damian’s only way to insure that Logan wouldn’t walk away. He knew Logan was a smart guy and would probably see his honeyed whines as deception, but he had to try, “You’re really just going to get me drunk and then ditch me? Who knows what could happen?”

Logan’s eyebrows creased but he didn’t say anything. He looked like he was in pain, eyes sharp and teeth clenched behind a grimace. It was enough to make Damian drop his hand.

“Logan, it’s entirely your choice but if you would like to stay with me, I would enjoy that very much,” Truth wasn’t his strong suit, but he figured it was worth a try.

Logan squinted at him, confused or at least doubtful, “I thought you disliked my judgmental attitude.”

Damian groaned, “Dude... I didn’t mean it like that. I thought it was funny. I think you’re funny.”

“Oh,” Logan looked like he was having a hard time processing Damian’s words. It made him wonder just how many of those tequila shots Logan had thrown back before walking over. He had to be drunk. It was the only way to explain why he was acting so strange.

Damian reached out again and slowly pulled Logan back. He was hesitant but didn’t resist. Logan sat down next to Damian as if he didn’t understand his own actions. His eyes picked Damian apart like he was looking for the fine print.

“You’re sure you don’t mind me?” Logan’s expression was completely open. He was looking for the truth and Damian didn’t think he’d be able to lie if he wanted to. It was a good thing he didn’t need to.

He smiled, “Yeah, I’m sure.”

“Oh. Ok,” Logan settled back into the couch but his eyebrows were still weaved together. Apparently his programs finished running because he suddenly turned to Damian, grinning brightly, “I’m glad.”

Damian smiled back. He was happy to see Logan with that sparkle back, if a little confused as to how he had caused it, “You’re glad... I don’t mind you?”

Logan nodded, “Some people think I’m a little strange.”

“Yeah, I get that,” Damian winced and tried to rush out his next words, “Not, like, I think you’re strange- I think you’re really cool. I just mean people think I’m strange too.”

Damian swore he could map constellations in the stars floating in Logan’s eyes, “You think I’m cool?”

He shrugged, “I mean, yeah. You always seem to have it all together and you have determination and goals and it’s so obvious that you’re going to reach them. That passion is rare to see any more. I mean, I don’t have any of that. You don’t know how much I looked up to you in that class.”

Logan blinked at him like a deer in headlights for a moment before he began frowning, “But you’re incorrect.”

Damian looked up from where had been trying to see how much champagne was left in the bottle, “What do you mean?”

“You obviously have passion. You always had points to bring up during discussions and it was clear you had deep interest in the topics. You don’t know how in awe of you I was. You always found the least likely angle to take and still managed to make a convincing argument,” Logan took the bottle out of Damian’s frozen hands and took a drink, “It was art.”

Damian opened his mouth but all memory of speech had escape him. He looked away, trying to find something safe to stare at while he tried to gather his thoughts. His head was full of fragments, dulled glass shards that floated through fog and bumped against the edges of his mind. It hurt to try to put them all back together into one piece.

So Logan had noticed him in that class. And had remembered him; quite clearly it seemed. Except the way he was talking... nobody had ever spoken to Damian that way before. He was tempted to ask Logan if he had mistaken him for someone else.

He found his eyes wandering down to the space between them. More accurately, he was staring at how little space there was between them. When Logan had sat down the second time, he had done so right next to Damian. Like, right next to him. Now their legs were pressed together, hips and knees bumping together every time one of them shifted. Damian marveled at the fact that he hadn’t noticed before.

“Damian?” He looked up into Logan’s concerned face. God, they were so close, “Are you ok? Your eyes kinda glazed over.”

Damian laughed. It sounded breathy and far away, “Yeah, I’m good.”

From another room, someone started yelling, “LAST 15 MINUTES OF THE YEAR!!”

Logan squinted down at his watch before glaring in the direction of the voice, “There’s only five minutes left.”

Damian chuckled, watching the lines of Logan’s frown as he grimaced at the sea of people around them. There was something endearing about the blunt disdain Logan had for the idiots around them. It was nice to know he didn’t fit into that group, that he had- by some miracle- managed to fit into Logan’s bubble.

“So... you usually celebrate New Years like this?” Logan had suddenly become quite fidgety, wringing his hands in his lap. Damian tried to ignore it. He was having a hard enough time working on his own thoughts; he couldn’t even begin picking apart Logan’s thoughts.

Damian shook his head, “You mean a party? Nah, I usually don’t even celebrate. What about you?”

“Same. I don’t generally go to parties at all.”

Ah, so Damian’s original impression had been correct, “So what are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” Logan deftly avoided the question with a smirk. Damn, he was good at this.

Damian rolled his eyes, “Some friends dragged me here. Now you tell me what a straight-laced nerd like you is doing in a place like this.”

Logan snorted, “Don’t remember the last time anyone described me as straight- anything.”

“What?”

“What?”

Damian wanted to shake his head like a dog getting out of water. Maybe then, the pieces would fall into some sort of pattern he could recognize. So Logan wasn’t straight. Why did that make him so happy?

He ran his hands through his hair and tried to gain some composure, “Ok, so what is someone like you doing in a place like this?”

Logan looked out across the crowd, his mouth a tight line. On the other side of the room someone took a running start and flung themselves on a pool table that had currently been in use. The thing cracked in half.  

“I was-,” Logan paused, hands tapping quickly against his leg, “-convinced.”

Damian raised an eyebrow, “I’ve never heard someone talk so ominously about going to a party; what is that even supposed to mean?”

Logan winced. His hands were doing full cardio now, clenching into fists over and over again, “I was told someone was going to be here. I just really wanted the chance to talk to him again.”

“But you’ve only talked to me.”

“Yes,” Logan gave him that stare again like Come on, dude, the puzzle pieces are right there- just put them together. He rubbed his eyes in his hands, “Maybe this was a mistake. I didn’t mean to get you drunk. I thought you’d still be able to figure out-“

Click.

Damian’s mouth fell, “Wait, I’m the one you wanted to talk to?”

Logan gave him a small smile. It was the first time Damian had seen him look unsure of himself, “Well, yeah.”

“Oh,” Damian’s head was swimming. He could have blamed it on the champagne or how late it was or the way the lighting had began strobing, flickering between bright neon shades. But he knew that wasn’t it. He couldn’t lie this time- not even to himself.

Logan’s eyes were wide, staring into Damian. Not into his eyes- him. It was unnerving in the best way possible. The shifting light played across his irises, making them every colour of the rainbow.

“Is that ok?”

Logan’s voice startled him back to the present. He had leaned forward, supposedly to be heard above the shouting that had started. Amongst all of the raised voices, Logan’s had only gotten lower. His breath played against Damian’s ear.

Damian looked up, startled slightly but smiling, “Yeah, yeah, that’s good. That’s great.”

Logan smiled, “Yeah? Great?”

He was definitely leaning forward.

Damian huffed out a sigh but smiled even wider, “Shut up. I’m pretty sure you’re drunk.”

Logan scoffed, “And you’re not? You’re a total lightweight.”

“Shut up.”

“TEN!”

The entire house shook as the ridiculous number of students began screaming in unison

“You know, it’s also tradition to kiss someone on New Years,” Logan looked infuriatingly smug.

“NINE!”

Damian usually hated this part, everyone around him creating one huge voice- everyone but him.

Damian raised an eyebrow, “Are you asking to kiss me?”

“EIGHT!”

What he always hated most was the way the entire world seemed to be celebrating- without him. The whole damn planet filled with joy for one tiny moment and he could never figure out why.

Logan smiled like the Cheshire Cat- except the Cheshire Cat had just won the lottery, “Maybe.”

“SEVEN!”

At this point, his heart rate usually would have been spiking, feeling the pressure of “new opportunities” pressing all their expectant eyes on him.

Damian laughed, “Did you come over to talk to me just so you could get a kiss tonight?”

“SIX!”

There was always a part of Damian that would scorn him for not being happy, question why he had turned out to be such a sad, useless lump while everyone else was happily looking forward to the future.

“No,” Logan set his jaw like a stubborn toddler, “I came over here to talk to you so I could get a kiss from you tonight.”

“FIVE!”

No matter what he did, the New Year would plague him. His whole apartment complex would rattle as chanting counted down. The first hours of the year would often find Damian wandering through empty streets, desperate to escape the celebration.

Logan slid his hand onto Damian’s knee, “So can I? Kiss you?”

“FOUR!”

The whole event was just one monstrous reminder. It was an ugly mar on the calendar that whispered Look at all the things you’ve ruined. Look at how far you’ve fallen. Look at how little your future holds.

Damian nodded dumbly. His heart was pounding in his ears.

“THREE!”

New Year made him think of his parents. He always put on a bright mask for them, feeding them lies of empty aspirations and opportunities that didn’t exist. How would they feel to know their son was barreling headfirst into a dead end?

Damian was learning he didn’t need alcohol; Logan was intoxicating enough. The shine in his eyes, the self-satisfied tug to his lips, the way he kept getting closer and closer- it made Damian’s thoughts slow to a halt and everything around him lose focus.

“TWO!”

Every year, the day after would be exactly like the day before. Everyone else seemed to be determined to make themselves better. As much as he searched, Damian could never find the ways to change. New Years was usually taunting, reminding him that he would always be broken and would never be able to fix himself.

Logan’s hands played across his chest, smoothed over his shoulder, ran through his hair. His eyes found Damian’s soul. Damian couldn’t remember how to breathe.

“ONE!!”

Damian had always hated New Years.

Logan leaned all the way forward and his lips were on Damian’s. It was deeper than Damian was expecting, both of their mouths slightly open. Logan kept surging forward with his whole body, destroying the few inches left between them. Damian happily followed his lead, mindlessly falling into synchronous rhythm as Logan kept moving his lips. Except it wasn’t just his lips; Logan kissed with his whole body. He leaned against Damian and his hands were always roaming, leaving little touches as they danced over Damian’s body.

Sure, Damian had kissed other guys before. But he was pretty sure this was the first time anyone had kissed him.

One of Logan’s hands found its way to Damian’s face. His fingers tapped lightly across his birthmark. Damian remembered the kids who stared without shame, the eyes that would dart away as soon as they saw him, the way he could never hold a conversation without his birthmark joining as an unwanted guest star. Logan hadn’t done any of that. Damian had no words to describe what that man was but he liked it.

Damian broke away, completely out of breath. He had no idea how long they had been kissing- it could have been hours for all he knew- but his lungs didn’t have the same luxury of losing track.

Logan’s chest was heaving as it pressed against Damian’s side. His eyes were wide and glazed, staring a million miles away.

“Hey, Logan?”

Logan’s eyes regained their sharp focus. He smiled brightly, “I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now.”

“You’re a dork. But really,” Damian sighed, “thank you.”

Logan gave him a puzzled smile, “What for?”

“I’m pretty sure this is the first New Year I’ve ever actually enjoyed,” Damian snuggled himself closer to Logan, smiling when he felt an arm wrap around his shoulders.

Logan spoke with measured, careful words, “If you like, we could, you know, make our own New Years tradition out of this.”

Damian could feel his eyelids falling and rising every time he blinked like the great velvet currents of a theatre. They were heavy and he was warm and his head was a vague haze. He yawned widely and wrapped his arms around Logan’s waist, “I don’t think we have to wait until New Year to do this again.”

He fell asleep listening to Logan stuttering out some happy response. Maybe New Years wasn’t so bad.

If you want to be added to my Sanders Sides fic taglist just send me an ask or reply to this post :p 

~ @phan-fander @abi-beehive ~

#loceit #loceit fluff #loceit angst #loceit fic #loceit human au #loceit fanfic #loceit fanfiction #logan x deceit #deceit x logan #sympathetic deceit #sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #sanders sides fic #sanders sides human au #sanders side college au #ts logan #ts deceit #romantic loceit #starlight writes

[despairforme]

holly :   how strong is your muse’s sense of intuition ? are they aware of it ? do they ever fear that it is only paranoia ?

hollyhock :   how strong is your muse’s sense of ambition ? what’s something they strive for in life ?

hyacinth :   is your muse athletic ? does it come naturally to them ,   or have they had to work for their physique and/or skill ?

hydrangea :   how much does your muse value communication in their relationships with others ? are they prone to being misunderstood ?

iris :   if your muse could convey one last message to someone they have lost or left behind ,   what would it be ?

-slowly slides this here-

  ASK MEME ; 𝐁𝐎𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒 . ( accepting! )

     ‘ Intuition ‘. What a fucking complicated word. He thought he knew what it meant though. Wasn’t it like... The ability to easily understand things? In which case - NO, he absolutely didn’t have any sense of intuition. He had always been stupid, and that included an inability to understand people. Even those who he knew really well, like Grimmjow - he had a hard time understanding. It often seemed like his boyfriend could read his mind, but Nnoitra couldn’t perform any such trick in return. It was a cause of frustration for him, especially since when he TRIED to understand him, he almost always ended up assuming the wrong thing. Pretty much EVERY misunderstanding that had occurred between them had been Nnoitra’s fault. It wasn’t something he could help though. He had always been like this. Always assuming the worst about every single situation.

     ❝ My intuition is real bad. If I think I’m seein’ somethin’ without nobody explainin shit ‘ta me, I’m pretty sure it’s just my paranoia. ❞ There was a slight hint of humor to his voice. It lead him into a lot of shitty situations, but he head learned to live with it. It was just a part of his personality at this point. In any case, no matter HOW BAD he was at reading other people, he was still able to communicate with Grimmjow, and in the end that was the most important thing to him.

     The next question had him grimace a bit, as if he was making an errr sound. He WISHED he could boast about being real ambitious. WANTING stuff out of life. Like he had a career path to follow or something grand he wanted to achieve. There wasn’t. He hadn’t had any big goals since he was a kid, and back then it had just been one of those stupid childhood dreams. Like how everyone wanted to grow up to be a firefighter or a police officer or whatever. Nnoitra had wanted to become an astronaut. Because he wanted to leave earth. He couldn’t think of anything COOLER than going to the moon. It hadn’t taken many years for him to understand that something like that was completely unrealistic, and he had stopped dreaming. For the most part, Nnoitra’s life had been about survival. Not from something physical like starvation, but from his own desire to die. It hadn’t manifested itself in real suicide attempts. It had been an inability to see the future. Not WANTING there to be a future. Crossing the road without looking. Yeah, some days it was still like that.

     ❝ Dunno. ❞ He finally said, not wanting to say straight out that he wasn’t ambitious. It sounded kinda pathetic, he thought. ❝ I just live my life ‘n see what happens. I wanna be strong, ‘daz ‘bout it. ❞ Yeah, that was the ONE thing he always strived for. He wanted to be strong. To BE strong and appear strong. Nnoitra couldn’t imagine living a life where he was physically frail. He could hardly even deal with falling ill, because he’d feel so disgusted by his own weak body. He didn’t think he’d want to continue living if he ever got to the point where he was fragile. He didn’t think he’d make it that far anyway. He wasn’t going to die of old age. There was no way. 

     Other than wanting to be strong, Nnoitra was pretty modest in his wishes. He wanted to go camping with Grimmjow this summer. He wanted to lay in the grass in the sun. He wanted to eat good food ( preferably something sweet ), and have sex every night. He wanted a NORMAL life ( at least as normal as someone as him could hope to live ) that he could live without too many worries. And, most importantly - he wanted to be together with Grimmjow. If he couldn’t be with him, then NOTHING would matter anyway.

     ❝ Yeah, I’m athletic. Can’t ya tell? ❞ He didn’t like having anyone ( including himself ) point out his physique, but right now it seemed a better option to do it himself, since it was the subject for the next question. Nnoitra had always been skinny. When he was a kid, he was of average height, but still skinny. When he entered puberty, he SUDDENLY grew to be really - really tall. A little over seven feet. He was still very thin. He was still all muscles though. Long and lean, his muscles packed more strength than one would expect. Because of the length of his arm for example, he could easily arm-wrestle with guys who packed muscles. Working out didn’t do anything for Nnoitra, because he didn’t have any fat he could convert to muscles, he couldn’t build muscle mass. This really bothered him, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it. No matter how much he ate, he couldn’t gain weight.

     When he went to high school, before he lost his eye, he had played basketball. He had actually been the captain of the basketball team, and they had done really well. He had been GOOD, but he suspected that was more or less ALL due to his height. He imagined he still would’ve played to this day, if it hadn’t been for him losing his eye. He doubted he ever could’ve gone professional though. He wasn’t bulky enough for that. He had a lot of insecurities about his body, and he just lived with that. He disliked being shirtless, and tied to avoid it as much as possible ( he even slept in a t-shirt, and whenever him and Grimmjow fucked, he’d keep it on ). He liked wearing baggy clothes because they made his frame not look so thin. Guys weren’t supposed to be this skinny. They were supposed to be muscular, like Grimmjow.

     Despite everything, Nnoitra was still fairly atheltic. Not in his physique, but in SKILL. He made his living from fighting after all. He was fast and strong and agile. His height of course was a major advantage as well. Considering he couldn’t get thick and muscular, he had to have more natural talent than others to be able to keep to the level he was currently at. There really was NOBODY who was better at him when it came to fighting. Nnoitra was proud of that.

     Now, with the last question, it was back to talking about COMMUNICATION. Even if he was really bad at it, Nnoitra knew that communication was important in a relationship. Maybe not AS MUCH when it came to friendships, but romantic relationships? Yeah, then it really mattered. Thankfully, Grimmjow was good at understanding him, and a lot of the times when something was bothering him, Grimmjow would either guess what it was, or manage to coax it out of him. Nnoitra thought it took a special sort of person to be ABLE to deal with him. Grimmjow was that kind of person. ❝ Mah, ya know, if people don’t understand ya, then ‘daz their problem. ❞ No, not really. Most of the time it became his goddamn problem. ❝ It’s better ‘ta just hang out with those who understand ya without ya havin’ ‘ta explain everythin’ all’a ‘da time. ❞ This he did think was true. It was a hassle if he had to constantly explain his feelings or actions. Especially his feelings, since he didn’t like talking about them. 

#bannerofstarlight #[ the last one i already answered 8D ] #[ BUT YES THANK YOU! FOR THE ASK! ] #[ it helped a LOT with my wordcount!! ] #[ - prayer emoji - ] #[ and i just..... love writing about his modern verse ] #[ so many feeeeels ] #[ - for me bc i love him xD ] #[ thank you for the ask! ] #ᵈᵉˢᵖᵃᶤʳ ;; ic. #ᵇᵘʳᶰ 'ᵈᵃ ᶜᶤᵗʸ ;; verse. #ᵖˡᵃʸᵗᶤᵐᵉ ;; meme responses. #suicide mention //

[fatherlyssa]

QUARANTINED

summary; you and ethan are stuck in quarantine for 24 hours. alone.

word count: 2k

warnings: alcohol use

“okay, i’ll be leaving kyle’s in like twenty minutes and i’ll meet you at the house?”

that was the last thing you heard from your best-friend, grayson. but now you sat in the living room of his house, thirty minutes later, with no grayson. you weren’t too worried about it at first. figured he was just driving slow or that you had driven a bit too fast through the curvy hills.

you weren’t worried at all until the headline on the afternoon news read, ‘ALL OF CALIFORNIA UNDER LOCKDOWN’ in bright red letters. your eyes widened and you listened intently to the blonde haired lady with way too much contour on.

“all of california has been forced under a mandatory lockdown for the next 24-hours. all civilians are to stay in their homes and are not allowed to leave u less they have government issued papers that say they are allowed to.”

was grayson going to be stuck at kyle’s now? were you going to be stuck at grayson’s?

“oh fuck no,” you thought to yourself as you stood up from the couch and took your phone out of your back pocket. you dialed grayson’s number and placed the phone to your ear.

it rang for a couple of seconds before he picked up, “i’m guessing you just saw the news too?”

“yeah, i did. are you stuck at kyle’s?” you asked in an urgent tone, praying he’d say no and that he was pulling into the driveway.

there was no way you could be stuck here, alone, with him.

“yeah, i am. i’m sorry y/n.”

the groan that fell from your lips made you close your eyes and let your head fall back, “grayson, i can’t be stuck here with ethan. he hates me. he’s gonna like smother me in my sleep or something.”

ethan had always disliked you. for some unknown reason that you couldn’t get from grayson. you and grayson had been best-friends for over five years now and none of those years had ethan bothered to even try and act like he liked you. at this point he didn’t even bother acknowledging you.

“no he won’t, y/n. he’s not even capable of killing someone. you’ll be fine. there’s plenty of food in the kitchen and you know you can sleep in my room if you want.”

grayson tried to calm you down for the next five minutes and what he was saying helped a little bit, but there was still an anxious feeling in the pit of your stomach that wouldn’t go away. you ended the call with grayson and let out a heavy sigh.

“you really think i would try and murder you in your sleep?”

your heart nearly jumped out of your chest and ran down the roaring hills that were in their backyard. you turned on your heels and saw him standing there, his arms crossed over his bare chest in a relaxed position.

“i-“ you stammered before he let out a dry chuckle.

“i wouldn’t waste my energy.” he turned around and headed into the kitchen without another word.

your lips parted in shock. you couldn’t deny the comment kind of hurt. it should have calmed you down, but it didn’t one bit.

that’s it. i’ve had enough of this shit.

with all the courage and confidence you had in your body you followed behind him into the kitchen, putting your hands on your hips. he stood in front of the open fridge, bent at the hips searching for something.

“i don’t know what your problem is or why you hate me so much, but for the next 24 hours we need to at least try and get along for once. i don’t want to be stuck in this house with you as much as you don’t want to be stuck with me.”

you were proud for a moment for standing up for yourself. that was until he stood tall in front of you. his eyebrows narrowed at you, examining your face for any faltering in emotion. he towered over your body and as much as you felt intimidated, you didn’t let it show.

“i don’t hate you.” he said, letting his eyes fall down to the floor then back up to meet your eyes.

there was some emotion on his face that you couldn’t quite read. as fast as it had shown through was as fast as it was gone. once again, before you could say anything, he turned and walked away. hopefully heading to his room.

you pulled your phone out and sent a text to grayson.

do you have any alcohol anywhere in this house?

he replied back in seconds saying that cameron had left a bottle of wine in the fridge last time she visited. you pulled out the bottle of red wine and found a glass to pour it in.

this is the only way i’m going to get through the next 24 hours...

the one glass you poured turned into three and now you sat on the couch with the bottle in front of you. the notebook was playing on the flat screen tv and tears were pouring down your face. it was the scene where they had gone to their dream house before it was remodeled the way she wanted it. this scene always made you emotional but so did wine.

footsteps sounded from the hallway and even in your drunken state you wiped the tears away quickly and acted as if nothing happened. you looked up and saw ethan standing in the foyer. his hazel eyes focused on the tv.

“wine and the notebook? how basic..” his tone was almost playful as he let out a chuckle. that chuckle wasn’t dry and harsh. it was full of humor.

“wanna join?” you asked, the alcohol giving you a newly found confidence.

you watched ethan closely as he looked back at you. he shrugged his shoulders and fell down onto the couch next to you. like really close. you had expected him to sit on the other end so he could lay down and be comfortable.

you couldn’t help but stare at his side profile now, watching the next scene illuminated all his features. being around the twins so much, you realized quickly they had a couple different features. ethan’s lips always looked more pouty than grayson’s did. his eyebrows were always kept in a furrow which made him look mysterious.

“stop staring at me.” his deep voice made you jump slightly. he leaned up and grabbed the bottle of wine and leaned back. he poured more wine into the cup that was still clenched in your hand and then sat the bottle back on the table.

he took the cup from your hand and took a sip, his face scrunching up in disgust.

“you pussy.” you giggled watching him instead of the movie. “give me my wine back.” you said in a pouty voice as you leaned over and grabbed the cup back from him.

in your younger teenage years, you spent most of the time at parties. most alcohol now never made you grimace or shudder. you had been told by many of your friends you drank like a sailor and had a tolerance like one too.

you chugged the full glass right in front of ethan and then placed the glass on the coffee table in front of you.

“that stuff is disgusting.” he said, his eyes still watching you. “i’ll show you what i drink. come here.”

he stood up from the couch and outstretched his hand to you, pulling you to your feet. you followed closely behind him where he led you to his bedroom.

you had never seen his bedroom before, nor had you ever spoken to him this much. all of this had just hit you like a wrecking ball. leaving you even more confused than before. you didn’t let it bother you for too long as you watched him pull out a bottle of whiskey. it was a high class whiskey that you had never seen before. probably because you were too middle class with your alcohol choices. what ever was on sale was what went home with you.

“here, take a sip.” he handed the bottle over to you.

with no hesitation, you pressed the cold glass to your lips and took a sip. it ran through your body with a tingle and made a drunken giggle fall from your lips as you handed it back to him.

“that’s good shit.” you smiled as you watched him take a sip. “can i sit on your bed?” you asked him.

“yes mam.”

the two of you sat in a comfortable silence, passing the brown liquor back and forth. you weren’t sure how much time had passed by before ethan spoke up.

“i was jealous.” he said making you look at him in confusion. he had laid down on his back and was staring at the ceiling, his toned arms propped up behind his head.

“of?” you questioned, placing the whiskey bottle on the floor in front of the bed. half of it had been drank just from the two of you sitting here.

you were surely feeling it, but you weren’t completely drunk yet. you eventually would be if you kept drinking it tho.

“you and grayson. your relationship.” he sat up and turned to face you slightly. “do you want some clothes to change into? those jeans aren’t gonna be comfortable to sleep in.” he changed the subject, pointing to the black skinny jeans that basically painted to your body.

“i’ll go get something of grayson’s.” you said, standing to your feet.

“no,” he stood in front you. his hand placed on your stomach to keep you from moving. “i’ll give you something of mine.” his voice was demanding and almost scared you.

you nodded and watched as he walked over to his closet, pulling out a pair of black sweatpants and a large white t-shirt. he handed them to you and said he’d walk out so you could change.

still in confusion, you changed into the clothes and folded yours up neatly and placed them in the black desk chair next to you. you let him know you were done changing and he walked back in and fell down into the same position as before.

“grayson and i are just friends. you know that right?” you told him as you rested yourself on one elbow still facing him.

“i know.” he said in a matter-of-fact tone. “you guys got close so fast. like you two were destined to be friends with each other. you took my brother from me. but that wasn’t what bothered me the most. it was seeing him make you laugh until you were crying and him making you blush so easy. i knew you’d never be like that with me.”

his words had your heart pounding in your throat. what were you supposed to say to that? how was anyone supposed to respond to that?

“you never tried. you always acted like you hated me and never wanted me around.” you finally found the courage to speak up.

he chuckled lowly and closed his eyes, running a hand through his hair, “because i figured if i pushed you away i wouldn’t want you so bad, but god that did the complete opposite.”

he said the statement with such ease. effortlessly.

“you want me?” you questioned almost in a whisper.

you were worried he hadn’t heard you until he finally turned to face you. his eyes gazing into yours fully. you felt like he was looking into your soul and finding out every secret kept inside your mind.

“always have.”

#ethan dolan #ethan dolan imagine