#the thought of the bus is so unpleasant though

[podiumnorris]

Paper Rings | L. Norris

In which they allow themselves to become undone in each other's touch, and enter a new phase of their relationship.

word count: 5,9k | warnings for mature content (18+); protected sex, fingering, a small nod to a breeding kink, inexperienced reader and lando (but they try their best), possible offensive language, other than that just lots of fluff | prompt(s) used: s35 and s31

Accidents. You hated them. But while normally associated with unpleasant events, for once in your life it had been good. It wasn't intentional that you met Lando Norris and became friends, but eventually, he had unexpectedly asked you out.

You had encountered the young Brit at a party of a mutual friend. You despised parties, and after you had arrived and greeted the birthday girl, you became to realise why; everyone was high off their asses.

It had barely been twenty minutes into the party, and you had already found yourself alone at the bar with a glass of sugar-free Coca-Cola. You did not like drinking alcoholic liquids, and you had thought you were the solitary person in this building to be feeling like this until you saw a young man sit about three metres away from you - most likely drinking the same exact drink as you did.

“I’m Lando,” he had said as he caught your eye, walked up to you and extended his hand for you to shake. “I take it you are not a frequent drinker either?”

Your rosy cheeks flushed while you shook your head, quietly confirming his thoughts. He looked stunning; bright eyes taking all of your attention from the loose blouse and neat trousers. And then to come back to the curls atop his head; you felt like you couldn’t breathe.

After talking with Lando for the rest of the memorable night, you ultimately felt your social battery run out and decided it was time for you to go, much to your dismay.

With his beaming smile and plumb lips shaping around his teeth, he gently assured you that it was no big deal, and if you had wanted to, you could meet up another time. There wasn’t a single doubt inside your mind when you have him your number, and he promised you he would send you a message after offering you a ride home, which you politely declined.

You had gone home that night, head in the clouds, and your fingers itching to look the youngster up on the internet. He had let it slip that he was a driver, though you weren’t certain for what. Was he a taxi driver? Bus driver, perhaps?

Whatever it was, you were too curious not to look it up. He had to have a social media page somewhere, and with a name like that it shouldn’t have been hard to find. Therefore you eagerly searched for his name; Lando. You hadn’t quite gotten his last name yet, so after searching past a certain star wars character, you finally saw his familiar face pop up on the glowing screen. You frowned thoughtfully. He was a Formula 1 driver. You weren’t so sure how he had managed to avoid that topic altogether, but it caused you to appreciate him even more.

It was about two to three months and a few cat and mouse games after that, around Valentine's Day, that he had asked you out. In the few months of being friends, you weren’t entirely sure what you had done to deserve such a kind human being in your life, but you accepted his invitation, nonetheless.

Therefore there you were; happily together for five more months - except this time as a couple. And it couldn’t have been better.

The both of you decided to take it slowly; neither of you had a lot of experience, and you certainly didn’t want to rush things that didn’t need to be rushed.

He had asked you to accompany him at races a couple of times, but you kindly declined each time. You felt like it was invading his personal space, like barging into an office when someone's at work. He could dismiss your thoughts as much as he liked, but it wouldn’t convince you. ‘Some day,’ you had promised.

Denying his kind invitation to his home race felt wrong, but you just weren’t ready. And he accepted that. So, you had made a comfortable spot on your sofa, windows open, and an iced tea in your hands while you watched the race weekend on your television.

You practically screamed when your boyfriend put his orange and chrome car on the first row. The season had been incredibly harsh for both McLaren drivers, but it ultimately seemed they were getting close to where they formerly stood.

And then, the race. Never in a million years would you have thought he would lead a race this year. It only was for a couple of laps, but he managed to pass the reigning world champion during the start and was ahead of the Dutchman even before the first corner.

The race was intense, and you had long forgotten your prepared drink and snacks on the table. But when Lando crossed the line in second place, you almost felt joyful tears escape your eyes. You could contain yourselves, wanting to seem strong for nobody in particular.

In the middle of the podium ceremony, your mum sent you a quick text, ‘he bloody did it again’, and you could no longer contain your tears. You took photos of your television screen, acting as if you did join him during this race. And oh, how you wish you had.

He called you as soon as he was finished with the media duties, like he always does, and talked you through his racing thoughts of the past three hours. And you could do nothing but listen intensely.

He went straight home to you after he was no longer required at the track, your apartment being a small four-hour drive from Silverstone. You had told him he could take some well-deserved rest first, and visit you the day after, but he just desperately wanted to see you.

After a few hours of eager anticipation, you heard the door open, concluding your boyfriend had let himself in with the key you had given him just the week before.

You shot up to meet him in the middle of the living room, where his suitcase and shoes had already been long left at the door. Your socks-covered feet tried their best not to slip from underneath you, and you embraced Lando in an affectionate hug, his arms finding their way around your waist immediately, resting his hands on your lower back.

You took in his scent, cologne mixed with shampoo from his shower after the race. He wore a hoodie from his newest merchandise collection, and you mentally scolded him for dressing like that with the heat hanging over your country.

“I missed you so much.” You told him, and you had. You always had to miss him for a couple of weeks at the least with the races, but he promised he would come back to you. And he always did.

“I’m here, love,” he murmured into your neck, his warm breath causing a shiver over your back. “And so did I.”

“You did so well.” You whispered tenderly, trying your best not to sniffle right then and there. But he caught onto it.

“Hey, hey,” he pulled back from your embrace, causing your hands to slide down to his chest, his palms resting on your cheeks. “Are you crying?”

You chuckled. Of course, you chuckled. How could you not? This man made you laugh with almost every single word he said, even when he tried to be serious.

“Guess I’m just a little overwhelmed,” you looked him in the eyes, those mesmerising irises looking back at yours - concern mixed with a smile. “It’s been a tough mental day, but seeing you back on that podium again -“ you paused for a brief second, a lump forming in your throat, trying your best not to fully let your tears fall. “It was all I could have asked for this weekend.”

He smiled. Genuinely smiled. He could barely afford any other emotion around you than genuine happiness, and you reciprocated that feeling.

“I did it for you,” he smiled, thumbs caressing your cheekbones, and you suddenly felt weak in the knees. His intense gaze, perfect smile, and lips wettened from the times he occasionally ran his tongue along them.

You weren’t exactly certain what came over you, but you grabbed the collar of his sweater, pulled him down to your height and embraced his rosy lips in a loving kiss.

He was taken aback, sure. But it merely took him a few seconds to answer your gesture and deepen the kiss even more.

“You didn’t just do it for me, and you know that.” You giggled as you pulled back for air, and he could barely open his eyes, still captured in the haze of your presence.

“Well, I also did it for you.” He answered, in that tone that he has when he’s excited, where most of the internet won’t be able to decipher if he’s crying or just genuinely laughing. But of course, you would know.

You looked at him, lips red from your kissing, and you chuckled once more. You felt butterflies erupt in your stomach, and you almost wondered if your eyes turned into heart shapes.

“Lando,” you breathed, his name being just a singular word, but it came out more shaky than ever. “I think I’m ready.”

He was at a loss for words. In the months you had been together, neither of you had initiated the following step of intercourse. And neither of you felt the need to. It’s not like you and Lando had never done this before. This undoubtedly wasn’t your first relationship. But you had thought this fell under the term of taking it slow, and the desire just had not been there yet.

Until now. And he didn’t know what to say.

“If you don’t want to, we can just-“ “No, no-“ he cut you off, trying to come up with the right words. He did want to, but it just didn’t come out. Your gentle smile started to turn into a frown.

“I do,” he started. “I want to, I-“ he was flustered. And slowly, your nerves started to fade, and a smile came back to your face.

“Lando,” it was now your turn to place your palms on his cheeks, resulting in his landing on your hips. “Easy. No need to get so nervous.”

He let out a profound sigh of relief, and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

You clasped his dampened hand, leading him to your bedroom. It hadn’t been the first time he entered this part of your small apartment, and neither had it been the first time he had been in this bed. But this time it was different. And he wasn’t certain if he should be nervous or excited about this next step.

You looked outside the window above your bed, the moon coming to stand high in the unclouded sky as the sun said a quick hello to its other half before starting to strike the horizon and taking the light with it.

The golden hour had started, and somehow it made you experience all kinds of things for this intimate moment.

You sat down on the bottom end of the twin-sized bed, pulling Lando down with you so he sad next to you. You experienced a tingling sensation between your legs, but you weren’t entirely sure how to start acting on it.

And then you did. Unknown courage entered your body, whether it was lust or braveness, you weren’t certain. But you carefully placed your lips onto his, after which he immediately returned the favour.

You carefully stood up, Lando wanted to follow your eager actions, but you gently pushed him back down on the bed and sat on his lap, a leg on each side of him.

His graceful hands landed on your hips, your hands on his warm face, as you both battled it out for dominance into the kiss. It wasn’t rough, but both of you were desperate.

Lando decided to take a bit of control, messily picking you up and gently lowering you onto the soft covers of your bed, not breaking the kiss as he came to hover above you.

When you broke apart for air, you reassuringly smiled at each other and loving eyes never breaking contact.

“You know, Carlos told me the other day that -“ “Lando, shut up about Carlos right now.” You cut him off as you passionately kissed him again, this time hungrily trying to pry his hoodie off of him, but failing miserably.

He broke the kiss, lifting himself up and taking off his neon yellow piece of clothing, only to reveal yet another piece in the shape of a t-shirt.

“I swear to god, you are going to be suffering from a heat stroke someday.” You chuckled at the man above you, delivering him a look and he took the hint and undid himself from his shirt as well before leaning back down to capture you in another kiss with a smile.

He didn’t answer your humorous remark. But he didn’t have to. You knew he wouldn’t listen anyway.

You allowed your hands to roam over his chest, down his abdomen and towards his joggers. But, before you could reach the hem, he stopped you. He gently shoved your hands away as he reached for your shirt, and you took the hint to sit up and assist him.

Breaking the kiss for no more than a few seconds, his lips were on yours again after successfully removing your piece of clothing and you took off your bra before laying back down.

Nerves settled in your stomach and Lando could immediately sense it.

“Hey, love,” he broke the kiss to look into your eyes, barely glancing a single look at your exposed chest just yet. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“I know,” you smiled at him and reached up to cup his cheek and gently stroke the area with your thumb. “I want to. But it’s been a while.”

He did nothing but smile at you. That warm, loving smile embracing all of the unique features on his face, the smile that got you head over heels for him in the first place.

“Okay,” he chuckled. “Can I?” He finally gestured to your chest, and you nodded before biting your lip and letting go of his warm cheek.

Lando gave you a final kiss to your lips, before finding a path down your neck, towards the valley of your breasts. He placed his tongue around your left nipple while taking care of the other with his strong fingers.

A contented sigh escaped your lips, and you could feel him smile against your skin as you let your fingers glide through his soft curls. The hand that was caressing your breast hesitantly left its spot, and like it had a mind of its own, travelled down to your own joggers. Lando loosened the knot in the strings which were used to keep them up, and his mouth left the spot on your other breast.

He travelled down, placing delicate kisses on your stomach on the way, causing your hands to glide from his hair and land next to you on the mattress.

He shot you one last questioning glance, and you slowly but eagerly nodded, and he grasped this as his sign to carefully undo you from your pants.

Much to your dismay, Lando took his time. Your joggers slid off your thighs with ease, and you felt his delicate and strong fingers glide over your sensitive skin. You shivered out of sensual pleasure, and your boyfriend looked up with a sly smirk. Your thighs were one of your most sensitive spots, and his gentle touch sent goosebumps over your body. He now knew that, too.

When one of the final pieces of fabric had been taken off your body, Lando gently tossed it towards the chair in the corner of your room, where his sweater and both your t-shirts and his hoodie had previously ended up as well.

You looked at him as he stood at the edge of your bed, and you couldn't decide what you desired to do more; hide yourself from his intense gaze, or let your mouth water at the sight of his trained torso.

Lando, however, didn't allow you to think twice and was soon quick to hover back above you and plant another kiss on your reddened lips.

His wet kisses went towards your neck, to a certain spot just below your ear, towards the place your neck and shoulder meet. You felt his tongue on your skin, rosy lips surrounding the wet sensation, as he forcefully sucked on the spot.

Your right hand flew towards the nape of his neck, right where his hair ended, and tried its best to eagerly grasp whatever it could find.

Simultaneously, your other hand ended on his side, your touch tickling his exposed skin, and he couldn't help but chuckle.

Another sigh unwillingly escaped your lips at the sensation, and he got back up to examine your eyes.

Your pupils were heavily dilated, your breath was unsteady, and sweat started to form on your forehead near your hairline. But he couldn't help but look at you adoringly.

"Can I touch you?" Lando asked, a charming smile still plastered on his face. You could barely answer. Your chest felt incredibly tight, and your mind was filled with just one word as you looked at the man above you; love.

It frightened you. Absolutely terrified you. Neither of you had shared the three most famous words yet, and you certainly didn't expect it would take this to deliver them into your mind.

Feeling like you've let your boyfriend wait long enough, you eagerly nodded before giving him one last kiss.

Lando looked at the purple reminder on the side of your throat with a proud smile before he let his hands wander down towards your underwear. His eager hands slipped into your panties, a quivering breath escaping your lips as his thumb put pressure on your small bundle of nerves when he found it.

With one final look of approval, he slid off your panties with ease and stashed them with the rest.

His fingers caressed your thighs before finding their way towards your core. He slowly made his way towards the part where you desired him most, but not before teasing the whole area, naturally causing you to let out a frustrated groan.

Lando chuckled. Actually chuckled. It wasn't the first time he had done this tonight, but you never believed sex could actually be funny. And it made the experience all the better.

He finally thought you had had enough teasing for the night, and he carefully entered you with his pointer finger.

To be absolutely honest, he had no idea what he was doing. He tried to memorise stories from others or books he had only half read and then tossed them somewhere randomly, but he never came close to doing it like that himself.

Anticipating your reaction, Lando added another finger when he noticed you clenching around the bare minimum. He moved, slowly but steadily, and small moans began to erupt from your throat.

"Is this okay?" Lando asked after a few strokes, looking up at you to await your reaction.

"Apply pressure with your thumb, right here." You informed him, moving his hand in the slightest and repositioning it to your liking.

And once he applied pressure to the part where you needed him most, and hit a good spot inside, you were almost done for.

Your head fell back into the pillows while he felt his fingers gain more wetness from your core, and your hands reached out to grab a hold of his hair but were met with nothing but air.

He took the hint of your desperate gesture, slightly moving his head towards the direction of your hands as they were still grabbing around for him- like a child reaching for its toy.

You pulled on a particular strand of his soft curls, and he wasn't certain whether he groaned out of pain or pleasure. But, after detecting the sounds that escaped your lips, he was sure it definitely must have been the latter.

"Y/n," Lando breathed as he looked up, meeting your distracted gaze. "Your pretty sounds are like music to my ears, and I could listen to them all day."

You let a slight laugh escape your lips as your head fell back, and you gave another loving tug to his hair.

"Lando," you mimicked his tone, another quivering breath leaving your lips as he continued his pleasurable pace with his fingers. "I- I kinda need you now, are you ready?" You could barely speak, too distracted by the feeling between your legs and the butterflies that erupted through your entire body.

"I think I am," he said as he retreated his fingers, awkwardly looking at them as he secretly swiped them off on his joggers. "Might need a few- uh- strokes. But I think we should be okay."

We.

This was the moment you were about to become one, the final parts of your bodied finally exposed to each other.

"Do you have any condoms?" He asked, and you recognised the minor change in his voice; he felt awkward.

And you totally reciprocated the feeling. There was barely anything more awkward than sharing this kind of intimacy for the first time, being new to each other's likes and pleasures, and having to find out what turned the other on.

You sat up and leaned on your elbows before pointing at the closet on the other side of the room.

"They're in there, uh, top shelf." you stated, and he clumsily walked over to the piece of furniture. His eyes widened at the sight when he opened it and felt a sudden wave of redness taking over his whole body.

"There's- you have a full box of them?" He said as he grabbed the box and turned to you. You fell back, hands covering your flushed face.

"Diane gave them to me a couple of days after her party," you mumbled, a sigh escaping your lips. "She saw us talk and, well, yeah. You know her." A simple 'oh' had left his lips before he grabbed one chrome-looking package from the box and placed the rest back.

"Well, at least we have them." He laughed awkwardly as he returned to the bed, a shaky 'yeah' coming from you as a response.

You retracted your arms as you saw him sitting next to you on the bed, the golden light from outside perfectly framing his features.

The golden hour was made for him.

And you were the lucky one that had him in their bed.

Lando undid himself off his joggers, not caring enough to put them with the rest- so he just left them where he took them off. His boxers followed soon after as he sat back down on the soft covers of the bed.

You barely dared to look, but eventually, you did. And you carefully reached for his member, gently wrapping your fingers around the length. You looked up to search for a look that would tell you he was uncomfortable, but it was the contrary. He sought his best intentions to hold in a moan, but as you started to move your hand, he failed miserably.

He, in turn, reached back between your legs to bring back that on-edge feeling you almost felt before he stopped.

Warming up to each other, Lando retracted his hand, grabbed onto the wrist of your hand that was working on his member, and placed it beside your head. His fingers felt slick, once more covered in the wetness of your own arousal.

Gently, he came to a position in between your legs, leaning on his knees and his hardened length halfway towards his stomach.

He messily tried to rip the foil package in two, barely succeeding but ultimately held the condom between his fingers before rolling it onto his member.

Lando leaned forwards, and he placed his hands on either side of your head, your legs locking around his hips and your hands finding their way to his sides.

"At any time, please tell me if you're uncomfortable, okay?" he said, and you nodded eagerly before responding, "Same to you."

You closed your eyes as he wettened his tip with your arousal and carefully entered you. It wasn't pain that rushed through you, but it did feel unpleasant. You placed your hands on his chest to halt his movements and took your time to adjust to the new feeling of your boyfriend inside of you.

When you opened your eyes, you were confronted with the most caring and loving gaze you had ever encountered. You knew Lando wasn't experienced, and neither were you, but he genuinely cared so much about your well-being. It made this new experience so much better.

"You can move," you told him after about half a minute. "God, please do." He smiled at you before placing a delicate kiss on your lips, and he carefully started to move.

The feeling soon turned into pleasure for both of you and suddenly, neither of you could get enough of each other's touch.

Kisses were messy, loose strands of hair were being pulled, and nothing could ever beat this moment of being intimate with your partner for the first time. Lando made it perfect for you.

After a couple of strokes, you experienced a vaguely familiar sensation building in the pit of your stomach and a tingling feeling coming from your core.

But, you weren't quite there yet. Therefore, you grasped one of his hands and assisted him towards the part where you needed him the most. He took the hint, placed his thumb on your clit, and started making figure eights on the little bundle of nerves. It wasn't perfect, but it worked, and his name started rolling off your tongue more than once.

And it was the same for him. Watching you unravel in pleasure caused by him, your breasts bouncing with each move of his hips like you were a machine tangled in each other. And at that moment, it felt like you only worked with each other.

Your soft walls gripped around him, and he was afraid he wouldn't last much longer, but for you, he would try. For you, he would do everything.

"Lando, please move faster." His unique name escaped your sensual lips in a hurry, a mix of sighs and groans barely making it clear what you were saying. But he understood and got on with it.

"You feel so good," Lando said as he started building up a quicker pace. "Please tell me what you want. What you need."

"Anything, everything," you breathed, grabbing his hand that was working on your clit, and gently pulling him back up to get him into your line of view. "Kiss me. Kiss me like you mean it."

And so he did. It wasn't pretty; teeth clashing, lip biting. But it was everything you could wish for.

When Lando started to chase his own orgasm, he instinctively picked up his pace and twisted it into a couple of rough trusts. He wasn't certain what came over him, and for a second, he was anxious this might not be as pleasurable for you as it was for him. But all his worries faded as soon as you pulled him into an embrace, and he fell atop of you, his face buried in your neck, and you vaguely mumbled a couple of words;

"You can have my babies." You told him. He wasn't entirely sure where that came from, but simultaneously, he wasn't complaining.

You, on the other hand, felt embarrassed. You clasped a hand over your mouth and mumbled a scared 'I'm sorry' to your boyfriend.

He retreated from your passionate hold with a reassuring smile, caressing your rosy cheek with his strong fingers. His pace slowed down a bit, but he didn't stop. And that eased your worries the tiniest bit.

"Don't apologise," he chuckled. This man, you thought. He can laugh about everything. "Though I'm not entirely sure where that came from, it might be a little too soon to be thinking about babies."

"No, please, I don't,-" you desperately sighed after taking your hand from your lips. "I don't want any babies. It just happened, I felt hot and my mind took me somewhere else and I just-"

"Ooh! So you have a breeding kink!" Lando exclaimed joyfully, and you felt your face redden at his blunt words. His movements halted, his hand returning towards the back of your neck as he rejoined your embrace.

"Do not fucking speak about this," you said as you hugged him back, feeling his bare skin against yours increasing the pressure between your legs. "In fact, don't mention it for another while. I don't want to think about it."

"As you wish." he smiled, and you were internally grateful he made no big deal about it and didn't find it the biggest turnoff in the bedroom. Everyone has their kinks. You just didn't expect yours to come out during the first time with your current boyfriend.

Lando picked his pace back up, and the feeling in your stomach returned as quickly as it faded before. You let your hands roam through his hair, caressing the back of his neck, as he started pushing in with stuttering thrusts, each of them slow and deep instead of harsh and sloppy.

You tactically moved your hips, trying to find that little fiction from his pelvis against your bundle of nerves, but your desperate movement caused him to reach that spot inside of you.

"Oh- oh my god." You instantly moaned, and Lando came back slightly to look at you, asking if you were okay.

"Definitely. More than alright," a faint sound of a passionate sob escaped your lips as he continued hitting your pleasantest part, a smirk forming on his lips. "Right there, right there."

He felt satisfied with himself. For a second, he was that proud boy who couldn't handle losing. And he felt like he had just won his favourite game.

"Right there, huh?" he teased you, and you quickly nodded before he kissed you again. However, because of your shortened breaths, neither of you could maintain a kiss as Lando picked up his pace and tried to both chase his own high and bring you to yours.

Your foreheads touched, lips just inches away from their other half as the both of you breathed through your mouths to get more air.

Lando shot a brief glance to where your bodies met before he could barely hold on to his pace and started to get sloppy.

You thanked nobody in particular that you had randomly come across a professional athlete. Because no other boy had ever even come close to the stamina the one above you had. nobody gave you the right amount of pleasure. None of them listened to your needs, and most importantly, none of them had ever given you relief.

Your walls tightened, white noise filled your ears, stars came through your vision and you softly clawed on Lando his arms as your high washed over you.

This was how it was supposed to feel.

Lando let out a particularly deep groan, grunting in your ear as your name left his lips, and he released into the condom. The feeling of your orgasm was simply too much for him, but he wished this moment would’ve lasted forever.

For a precious second, everything went quiet. No sounds filled the room except for your shortened breaths, and you took the time to just look at one another. Both of you were smiling contently, and you caressed his cheekbones with your fingers. Lando closed his eyes, simply enjoying your touch, and you looked at the spot where his lashes met his glistering skin.

“Lando,” you started, and he opened his eyes to meet your loving gaze. “I think I-“ You could barely let it out, afraid of what might change. Did he even feel the same way? Did you feel that way? Or was this just the heat of the moment for you, and would you wish you could take back your words right after you said them?

“I love you, too.” Lando finished your sentence, adding the last part to let you know he did feel the same way. You chuckled and pulled him down towards your lips, giving him a kiss that held more words than you could ever speak.

You quickly became to realise Lando never pulled out, and his sudden movement caused you to tremble lightly, suddenly feeling overstimulated by the feeling between your legs.

“I love you, but I’m getting a little overwhelmed here.” You grinned up at him as you pulled apart, after which he replied a quick ‘right, sorry’ and carefully pulled out of you immediately.

A gentle sigh mixed with a moan left your lips at the friction, but Lando got up and went over to your bathroom to toss away the condom and returned with a dampened washing cloth so you could clean yourself.

You looked at him with adoration as he re-entered your room, eyes lingering on his trained abdomen and once more realising how good looking this man actually was.

“See something you like?” Lando said as he handed you the cloth, and you carefully cleaned your core and made sure not to touch any sensitive spots.

“Certainly,” you said as you got up and headed towards the bathroom as well, causing your boyfriend to frown in confusion. “Don’t worry your pretty little head, I’m just going to pee. Does wonders for your health.” You gave him a wink as you turned the corner while biting your lip to contain another laugh.

You were happy

Lando laughed at your remark before putting his boxers on and turning on the nightlight next to your bed. He slid under the covers, quickly checking his phone, though he didn’t find anything worth replying to.

Once you returned, you also put on some clean panties and joined him under the covers of your warm bed.

You shot a glance at your phone on the nightstand, lighting up with multiple alerts of missed calls and messages, but you weren’t worried about them for a second. The only thing you saw was the name of your friend in the notifications and decided to briefly look at what she needed but didn’t care about responding.

Please tell me you finally fucked.

He ended p2!! P2 darling!!

That has to be the perfect moment for a celebration.

She was unbelievable. Of course, this had to be her way of asking, so blunt yet totally in her style. You couldn’t help but laugh.

“What is it?” Lando asked when you put your phone back on the nightstand and snuggled into your pillows, your gaze pointing at the ceiling.

“Diane,” you simply answered. “I don’t think any more context is needed.” He let out a small chuckle at that, immediately knowing what you were implying.

“I take it she knows her box came in handy, then?” he replied, and you just nodded.

You looked over at him, laying on his side and not breaking his stare at you. His head fit perfectly in the pillow underneath him, and he looked so comfortable that you could nearly cry.

“I love you.” You said, this time officially and quietly, and he was happy to respond.

“I love you, too.”

You hated accidents. Except when you went from friends to this.

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[crypticminx]

Hi! I loved ur telling Felix if pregnant fic so could we get a p2? Maby e Felix helping reader a morning sickness. Just fluffy ❤❤

Hi my angel!!! here you go! Xoxo

Pregnancy with Felix ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

AN: part two to my headcanons, very fluffy xoxo

- Felix would grow to be exceedingly close and overbearing of you at all times–all within good reason, of course. You felt incredibly tired? No problem, his usual disorganized bed would be neatly prepped and cozy for you with a cup of tea waiting on his night side table. Morning sickness? He was behind you as you would throw up all of your unpleasant remains from the previous night, holding back your silky hair while he gently circled his palm along your sore arched back in soothing motions

- Felix would favor sleeping in with you even if that foolishly resulted in the ignorant academic missing his first morning class, but you were immensely important to him in comparison to his repetitive lectures. He’d wrap you deeply into his chest, entangling both of your legs and arms to construct some sort of warmth from each of your bare bodies. When you’d finally close your eyes to try and regain your interrupted rest, Felix would slide his hand down to just below your ribs and on your abdomen. Though you were barely showing, he could already feel some sort of connection to what was inside of you and it made him feel affectionately sympathetic. Most of all, it made him cherish you even more and from that moment onward, he was destined to continue to treat you in a way that differentiated him from any other sort of love you had ever received.

- It would be too soon for the two of you to move into Saltburn, a manageable idea Felix came up with on a whim upon the two of you trying to discuss the reality of your soon to be future that included a baby. Felix, who terribly wished he could stay with you to attend to your doting needs at every passing hour of each day, still had his classes to attend. You would carefully decide not to continue any further studies, withdrawing yourself from all your classes. Much to your angry parents dismay as they harshly yelled at you once the whole truth unraveled from your apologetic mouth through the lines of a telephone in an empty hallway. They were far away, convenient enough for you, but hearing their harsh tones of pure disappointment made you mentally feel like you had been hit by a bus; paralyzed with sadness among all your other unwanted hormones. Felix, seeing you shamefully walk back into his room was to the rescue as he tried his best to reassure you. There was nothing more he despised than seeing your pretty little eyes swell with tears that were caused from people who should've been supporting you.

- “Y/n, darling, look at me” he would softly cup your flushed, tear-stained cheeks, “I could pay for your education whenever you'd want me to, y’know?” You only nodded at him, sniffling as you felt yourself trying to keep it together. “In fact,” his dark eyes scanned the room before their full attention was back on you, “what do you say we go get a place together, yeah?”

- Felix was soon to follow in sharing the news with his parents and judging by the huge grin he sported on his gorgeous face after hanging up on the telephone, you knew that their reaction was eons away in contrast to how your folks retaliated. And with everything finally being put into motion, a flat just on the outskirts of where campus was located was hastily granted and approved to you and Felix. “Mum was practically screaming with joy,” Felix admitted as he ran his fingers through his hair, shaking his head in the process while his mind painted the image of his mother beaming with delight at the thought of a Catton grandchild.

- You imagined your flat to be cute, cozy and fitting, but this was Felix Catton we were talking about. Opening the doors after receiving the keys to your shared place, you were stunned at how breathtakingly modern and posh the interior was. A large living room accompanied with what seemed to be an extraordinarily comfortable sofa, marble stained countertops in a kitchen that was larger than your previous dorm room all topped together with 4 exquisite bedrooms. It was a strange feeling, not unsettling, but very downright gracious as you could see everything playing out as if it were a movie. Candles would be lit on the dining table, the mouth watering smell of dinner you just prepared would be flowing in the air, and there would be an eager infant placed on your hip waiting to be fed. As you’re about to feed your young, Felix would walk in, looking exhausted from a tiresome day, but happy to see the two most important people in his life.

- “So?” he would interrupt your thoughts as he could see you relishing the moment. “I love it,” you would breathlessly vow before Felix could only respond by lifting you off of your feet and cautiously twirling you around the hardwood floors of your flat.

- As the months would slowly start to progress and evolve into life with Felix, you felt at ease for once and being able to have time granted to you allowed you to focus on yourself and your pregnancy, making everything less complicated. You could take any given moment to rest and let your body prepare itself for your child. Felix would do everything in his strong willed nature to find the best doctors for you, being in attendance for every appointment with you, and always kept himself in line for having access to all of your desires.

- Changes–lots and lots of changes. Watching your stomach slowly swell outwards was fascinating and you had accompanied a new profound sense of gratefulness for yourself. Most of the girls your age would probably die if they had to say goodbye to their wardrobe of short skirts and tube tops, but that didn't matter to you anymore, what did was your baby. Felix, on the other hand, was constantly in a state of awe whenever he was around you. His protective hands were always placed on your bump, caressing it with the utmost care possible, all while extensively praising you. “So so beautiful seeing you like this, my darling,” he'd gently whisper in your ear as you laid on top of his lean body, enjoying the spell he'd put you under that was his touch. “Carrying my baby,” he hushed, kissing the top of your head, his fingers unable to stop themselves from stroking one of your sensitive breasts. “You're only going to get more beautiful.”

- With all the happiness, there were also many challenges that you faced. Feeling extremely emotional more days than others, it was mainly the rare moments that Felix wasn't home or around to embrace you with his devoted presence that made you feel like you were missing out on a chunk of events that you should've been at. Felix rushing in after a late lecture that took more of his daunting time than it should have, he swung by you, only giving you a quick pat of a kiss on your forehead, before he rummaged his tote bag of schoolwork away on an empty counter. “You're in a rush,” you observed as he changed his button down into something that seemed far more relaxed and calm. “Uh yeah,” he hurriedly spat, focussing more on fixing himself up, “Oliver and I were gonna head to the pub with a few of the guys, celebratory post midterm drinks and all that.'' Oh, you tried your hardest not to sound letdown by the fact that you would probably spend the majority of the night alone on the sofa continuing to read a catalog you had zero interest in. Felix wanted to hurdle himself to the front door, but feeling tension in the air that was so strong he could cut it with a knife, he paused and glanced at your face that was slowly becoming struck with sorrow. In response, he slowly padded his feet towards you. “What's wrong?” His tone was relaxed and not full of distraction. You sighed, feeling guilty for stopping him in his tracks, “I just feel like I've been missing out on everything,” you found your mind speaking out loud, too late in stopping yourself from speaking the truth. “I miss going out with you, being carefree and reckless,” you pouted, feeling like a fussy child. “Oh, sweetheart,” he took a seat beside you, “I can assure you’re not missing anything, in fact, I'd rather be with you all the time.” it was true, Felix didn't care for his past ways, he was more occupied in his life with you and he'd never trade that for any sleazy party. He rested a loving hand on your stomach, “this is far more important to me.”

- Felix’s favorite pastime hobby with you would be picking out names for your little one. Dressed in nothing but cozy knee high socks and an oversized T-shirt, courtesy of Felix, you would lay a journal just above your bump as your attentive ears would listen to all the ideas sprouting from Felix, smiling as his quick mind came up with more suggestions. “Genevieve for a girl?” he gave you a weary smile, not feeling too confident. “It's beautiful, but too posh and old, no? He chuckled, “mum would have a field day with that one,” he exaggerated his expression, raising his pierced eyebrow before rolling his smitten eyes. “So that's a no, I presume,” you giggled as you crossed it out with your pen.

- Your shared moments that were filled with ambience of love were your favorite times. Soaking every ounce of alone time you could get with Felix because before you knew it, the simple times would turn into long sleepless nights—and not the ones you favored the most with him. Felix would run a bath filled with relaxing salts for you to lay in as he would wash your locks and all parts of your body for you, letting his hands do the work as your head would tilt back in ease, letting all your soreness peacefully exit. The moments spent in bed mainly included Felix resting his head on your bump, freely talking to your child as his voice carried you to sleep. “I love you and your mum so much,” he kissed your bare skin with his soft lips, hoping not to stir you out of sleep, “daddy cannot wait to meet you.”

#felix catton #felix catton x reader #felix catton x y/n #felix catton x you #jacob elordi #saltburn #saltburn 2023 #oliver quick #jacob elordi x reader #dad! felix catton #Felix Catton x pregnant reader

[knightyoomyoui]

Momo x M Reader - "Crazy Stupid Love"

So this is one of my requests and probably the LONGEST one I had to grant because I just realized today that one of my readers made this request since November 2022, so I just want to say my huge apologies to you Dumbledore_1 for taking me too long to finally make this piece. This one-shot is a sequel to my Set 4 Momo x M Reader work titled "Somebody That I Used To Know" so if yall haven't read that one, better do so because you might not understand a little on what this story is about to tell and to give you guys a background from what happened to Momo and the reader's past, although I tackled the main point of this story clearly though. Lastly, I labeled this as only for male reader to feature because the first one also features only male reader, so it might be a weird for the female ones to read this. However, it's still up for my female readers there if you want to imagine yourself as a guy or for others to take place rather for this to aid your curiosities. Here's my Ko-fi account where you can drop your donations or ask for a commission. You can check it out on my Tumblr profile too!  Buy knightyoomyoui a Coffee. ko-fi.com/knightyoomyoui - Ko-fi ❤️ Where creators get support from fans through donations, memberships, shop sales and more! The original 'Buy Me a Coffee' Page. Enjoy reading and have a happy Christmas season, everyone!

YN was shaken as the barrage of stomps and steps coming from the other passengers effectively woke him up. The bus had stopped moving, and he peeked from the window with squinted eyes. There he saw a very familiar view.

A smile crept up on his face, and he followed through the remaining people exiting the vehicle. Stepping out, he grabbed his bag and luggage before the bus left them there at the stop point.

YN started to walk while wandering his eyes around at the surroundings. It never changed, he thought. This is still one of the places where he could get use some time off away from every troubles he's having from the city.

And that being said, YN came here for one specific purpose. He wanted to stay in his province of Daegu for quite some time to help himself allow to recover from his heartbreak and improve his well-being for the better.

He has been disturbed day and night by what Momo revealed to him since their last talk, which was one month ago. It led him to the point where he needed to be delving deeply into reflection about the painful revelation she had brought to light. The next important person in his life to whom he has been closest, Dahyun, became aware of her cousin YN's odd conduct. She made one quick suggestion that she knew would assist her cousin, who is in a mess, knowing that he had recently ended a difficult and unpleasant relationship with Momo. She is a little upset at what her cousin did to her friend, but she still needs to show compassion and kindness for him because he is a loved one. She had always despised those who were internally disturbed by shattered hearts. She is thus making every effort to support Momo and YN during these challenging times. Aside from the fact that he genuinely misses their province, YN paid attention to what Dahyun advised her to do. He packed his belongings and traveled for hours to go to Daegu. His grandfather and other Dahyun's side relatives welcomed him when he got there. They greeted him with open arms upon his return, which undoubtedly helped YN feel at home. Then, after spending months there, he bought a house for himself, which his family allowed him to live in alone. During the months he had to stay apart from everything, he had the opportunity to experience living alone in the heart of such a vibrant and serene environment. even though at first he found it tough because he knew that being left alone is one of his worst fears.

Even so, he still tried to endure all the pain as he knew that he needed this for the sake of taking a rest for himself after what he'd gone through. There's been a saying that you will never heal from the pain if you never consider to give yourself a break.

Those created the thoughts that were unable for him to dodge all the memories that ties him back to his ex-girlfriend Momo. Because of her, it finally had him to slowly reprocess and understood everything wrong that thay had gone through in their relationship.

He had it discover pieces by pieces and he got some help coming from one of his interactions with some of the locals around his place, as he turned himself to be a volunteer to their town as a way to give himself things to distract him and make his time more valuable and less boring.

He walked back and got one for himself to begin eating with the locals, joining the elders, after serving some food to some of the kids seated at the table.

A notification beeped into his phone, causing it to open. He saw it for a second and turned it off, right before one of the elders asked him something.

"Who is that girl?"

He paused on directing his spoonful of food on his mouth as he heard the elder's question. He looked at him who has this curious look presented on him.

You opened the phone again and showed the rest your wallpaper that got seen, your own picture of Momo on the screen.

"Was that your partner?" His grandpa asked, tempting him to a frown on his lips.

He hesitated to answer for a while as he stared at Momo through the phone. Gulping his throat, he cleared his voice before speaking out his answer.

"She was mine."

All of them became quiet and his grandpa felt the sullen mood of his grandson. "Son, the world hasn't been very kind to both of you, hasn't it?"

He shook his head, denying the assumption. "I'm starting to think that it's not like that. It was only her, and i'm her world who didn't treated her well."

One of ahjumma (female elder) furrowed her eyebrows at his claim. "Did you do something wrong on her?"

"I did, ahjumma." He nodded his head, tightlipped at how guilty he was. "I broke her heart. I didn't mean to but I had to. I haven't got to explain it further."

"Was it that huge of an effect on her?" the first harabeoji (male elder) who asked him about Momo took the turn. He sipped on the soup and kept your head lowered.

"She erased my existence on her life, like she never met me." He smiled bitterly. His heart starts to get heavy, emotions were slowly rising up in his chest. "I guess she brought back the favor because I tried to get rid of her, to push her aside, to make her feel unwanted."

He received a slap on the shoulder by his own grandpa, earning a yelp of pain from him. "And how could you do that?! That's a wonderful girl you just had and you wasted it."

"Believe me, YN you've done a terrible mistake of inflicting heartbreak on that poor woman. Take me and your grandma as example. Even if we had many faults and fights in our relationship until she passed away, I never forgot her and I know so as she wherever she is right now.

And how did we do that? By making up to each other. Acknowledge what wrongful acts you have done. And I'm telling you, son; if you really loved that woman you won't let her be like that to you. Be sorry for everything that you did, understand?"

He nodded at his mixture of scolding and advice. "B-but, I'm afraid I might lure her away."

"She may not forget, but she may forgive you if you convincingly say everything from your heart."

The elders gasped and awwed when they saw a teardrop flowed out from his eye, he was so invested at the rant spoke by his grandpa that he didn't even noticed that his guilt urged his emotions to break loose.

"What's her name, son?"

"Hirai Momo." He noticed the slight amazement in his face. "She's Japanese."

"She's pretty, you got a foreign lover who surely looked up at you all the time not until you showed her the opposite." He expressed his dismay. "But I still feel sorry for you, son. Like what you said earlier, it seems like you got lost on the consequences of the stakes that was put upon you on your relationship with her."

"Do you still love her?"

He kept everything of his grandfather's advice in mind during the days that went by, including the last question that was posed to him and for which he is still unsure of the answer. He decided to give it some time for clarity even if there were some residual sentiments. He asked his cousin Dahyun, who is getting ready for their group schedule, a startling question during one of their video chats, even though Dahyun knew she would have it coming.

"Uhm... Dubu, is she there?"

"Who?"

"Momo."

"Yeah, but she went with Nayeon unnie on the cafeteria, why?"

"H- How is she doing, Dahyun-ah?" He questioned with a sorrowful tone.

Dahyun paused for a moment and just watched her cousin's misery displayed on the screen. She knew that until now he haven't gotten over her, but she didn't expected that he would spoke it out and make it known.

She knew YN to be very secretive of how he actually feels that's why she thought he would just rather do it through action, like what he did to Momo when he was loving her smoothly until the confusions took part.

But Dahyun isn't satisfied yet for that. She know that the two still haven't been getting along fine together and she hoped it'll come someday, and she believes that the only thing needed for that to happen is for her cousin to bravely show up and tell it all by himself to the woman he hurted the most.

"She's doing well, oppa. She's still laughing along with us... well we're trying to make her happy these days."

You nodded, relieved that Momo isn't suffering as much as you do today.

"But I don't know if it just because of us, because uhm... actually oppa- should I say it first to you?"

Dahyun's cautiousness grew an alarming tenseful feeling on him that is making him uncomfortable.

"Go ahead, i'll be fine." He said. Dahyun hoped the same. "Okay. Don't tell me you didn't let me be." Dahyun warned him one more time. "There's a guy who's courting Momo-unnie currently and based from how unnie is receiving his efforts, I think it's winning."

He heard enough and he became silent for a while. He knew it would be painful but he just let it sink in. He's the one who caused all of this to happen. It was all just a pure karma in return for him.

"Is that so?" He reacted bland. "That's great. I-I'm happy for the both of them in case... yeah." He smiled forcefully.

Dahyun clicked her tongue and sighed. "Oppa, you're hurting."

"As I should be."

The next days, his phase was on recollecting their memories together, in which he reminisce whenever he encounters something that Momo used to love before; he used to be in that place to witness it with his very own eyes.

Everywhere he goes, there's always one reason for him to remember her.

The kids he always entertain and taking care of. Momo loved children.

"Someday, if we will be lucky enough to get married. I want us to build a family with two kids! I hope we can have both a son and a daughter..."

The pig feet which was one of their foods for dinner. That is Momo's absolute favorite food she would be willing to die for.

"You should cook more jokbal, YN! This is so delicious!"

Their pictures together on his gallery that is almost full of her beautiful face. He opened one of the videos there which contains one of the clips they recorded during their anniversary.

He smiled as Momo kissed him on the lips and nuzzled her head on her neck. The next thing was soft and low, but her voice was always catchy for him to be able to hear it clearly.

This has to be the most anticipating turned devastating words you will ever remember from what she said.

Not only because this was like an oath for the goal to the next path he wanted to reach with her, but also because this will now end up instead in his  imagination to haunt him with his guilt and definitely hers to occur with her desires.

"To more anniversaries and hopefully, a wedding in the future with you, YN. I love you."

Lastly are the peaches in the farm where he helps some of the farmers there to harvest and the dogs from the neighborhood who randomly visits his house were the ones to sum up everything that ties him back to her.

And in his last days in the Daegu province, he has finally see and understand everything clearly.

Before he rode the bus, he looked back at his grandpa who guided him to the bus stop.

"Remember the question you asked me about, grandpa. If I still do... love her?"

"Have you found the answer?"

"I do." He smiled. "And I promise you that I will try to make her hear my apology to her once I return to Seoul."

"Great for you, then. I wish you good luck, son."

They hugged together before they parted ways, with YN focused on his way back to the destination where his objective lies ahead.

A month after his departure from the province, he is back at Seoul where he is now currently looking for a place to work with these days.

Dahyun notified him one day that they'll be celebrating Jihyo's successful solo debut and she wants to bring him there because the girls misses him.

Hesitant at first that he knew that out of nine of them, Momo is the only one who doesn't want to see her, but he instead accepted for the sake of seeing his friends and to celebrate her special day when Dahyun assured him that Momo isn't like that to him anymore.

YN and Dahyun arrived at the restaurant together. The girls saw them from the table and they all cheered, except for Momo who is sitting there in silent and avoiding his sight. He noticed it and felt a bit unease as he entertains the rest.

And there, the two ex-couple finally saw each other again after quite a long time. Awkward at first, they still managed to greet each other when YN tried to test his courage for his plan tonight. Thankfully, Momo greeted him back shyly.

They ordered, congratulated Jihyo again for her success, talked a lot about how they've been doing, and ate their respective delicious foods to savor the precious time they're having together as a group.

As they went to enjoy the night by doing some videoke and chugging beers, YN noticed that Momo went outside to freshen up.

"Dahyun." He called the woman sitting beside her, munching some pizza. "It's time. I'll be right back." He said as they gazed at Momo's back facing them through her stance at the railings of the balcony.

"Be careful, okay? Make it sentimental and don't force if she can't have it all too well."

"Got it."

Dahyun patted him on the back before he stood up and carefully opened the sliding doors. He silently stepped towards Momo's figure, breathing becoming heavy, heartbeat rising rapidly.

He let out one last sigh before he began to confront the woman he wanted to meet and talk after months of waiting, recovering, and changing.

"Momo?"

She heard that familiar voice, she remembered what she told him almost a year ago, prompting her to try not to slip off on her character.

"Now you're just somebody that I used to know, YN."

Turning her body around, she finally has come to face to face with the man she tries to completely forget in her heart and mind.

"Yes?" She responded. It was cold and plain, and YN understand what he's putting himself into. He just had to let it go and proceed with his main intention for her.

"I know you don't want having me near you, but c-can I please just... please have a short moment with you?" He said. "It won't last long, I promise but if you don't want me... then, it's fine but I really wanted to say something very quick to you."

Momo was startled when YN called for him. From the way he acted, Momo is quite intrigued that this version of YN infront of her is now more cautious, kind and soft to her. This is almost like... a different person from the one he used to know-and endure- before.

Momo would be deceiving herself and she knows how awful it is to feel regretful to herself if she lets that, if she doesn't admit to herself that it actually made her convince and push her wants to atleast see or know something of himself in personal.

"Don't waste any more time. Go on." She granted him his request. Crossing her arms, she leaned on the railings and watched this poor, broken, and lonely man she used to hate seeing being like this.

"T-Thank you." He bowed a little and straightened his posture, breathing deeply before he proceed to let out everything he's been keeping to his chest. "I know I shouldn't be in here because I know you're still mad at me. I almost didn't attend but for the girls-"

"For the record, I'm not mad at you anymore." Momo seriously said. "I set it all aside, because like I said... I don't want nothing to do with you. You're a nobody to me now, but I'm just letting you for once as long as you prove what brought youself here with me and dare to come close with me after how we ended things together."

"I know about that, and that's why I'm just here to say one thing that I've never ever said to you.

I'm sorry."

Momo's eyes shut, biting her lip with her fist clenching after hearing that. "I'm sorry for everything. All I did was very wrong of me and I don't want you to force you to believe me but... I didn't intended to do that on you.

"I did love you from the first time I laid my eyes on you, to the time you gave back the same feelings as mine for you, and the beginning of our relationship together. I know I have been gotten cold to you as time passes but I want to clarify things that... it wasn't your fault at all, Momo. It was me."

Momo glared at him with a teary eyes. She hated it, but she had to recall all of the times she had to wonder every night why does this keep on happening and what did she do wrong that made him treat him with lack of affection. She wanted answers for a long time and gladly, the time has come for her to hear it straight away from the man responsible of putting her like that.

"I always wanted to be like you, on what you're doing for me and it's true. But I always look at myself lowly, thinking if what I'm doing rather wasn't enough for you." His voice began to crack, as his eyes became to get watery also from the immense emotions affecting him. "And instead of improving or sharing my worries to you, I chose rather to set you free from me. I did that, thinking it was for mercy but instead it looked like I wanted you to suffer more and it was so... so wrong for me to do so. I became so lost for that."

"I still love you up to this day, Momo."  With that, both synchronizably cried from that words that they used to say to each other as a vow but now, it turns out to be a forbidden phrase for them to exchange anymore.  "It's not that I didn't trust you it's just that... I was scared."

"My plead for you not to leave was true, I truly can't bear letting you go. But now, I think I believe that probably I deserve to be alone and unworthy of somebody's love to hold onto because what I did, I am willing to sacrifice my feelings for you, Momo."

"It hurts me so bad but I have to let you go now." He escaped a rough exhale before continuing. "I'm not going to plead for you to come back and ruin the happiness your getting with somebody else now. Again, I'm truly sorry again for rushing in our relationship, acting immature on times you needed my comfort and making you bring all the burden you never deserved to have to."

YN began to drop on his knees and positioned himself to kneel in front of Momo who was shocked at his action.

"YN! W-what are you doing, get up from there!" She dashed through him and lifted his body and in YN's disbelief, he made Momo envelope him into a longing and comforting embrace that belongs to one of the lovely things he wasted from an gracious woman like her.

They both sobbed in their own heartache and sympathized with their own struggles.

"I hate you for what you did to me YN but why!" Momo cried out. "Why did you kept it to yourself, huh?! Why did you let yourself struggling on your own?"

"You promised me that you'll try to be honest, but you didn't, and that made me think that being done with your fake love, I rather be going. You could've shared it all to me directly, I'm your girlfriend for god's sake, I could've helped you because I loved you!"

"I'm sorry.. I'm s-so sorry..."

Momo whined and screamed in a mixture of frustration, agony and disappointment for what their relationship had become and the complete clear revelations of how she got ended up suffocating and unpleased in his company.

"Get up." She helped him stand back to his wobbling weak legs again. "Finally you were now able to reflect yourself and tell to me that one words I just wanted to hear from you. I just wanted you to be accountable and say sorry to me.", Momo said, clarifying the last words she told to him back then.

"But now that you did and I've heard and seen enough your sincerity..." She grasped him in the shoulders and stared at him with a broken smile. "I forgive you, YN."

He nodded and cried again, finally getting the remorse and acceptance that he's been yearning and searching for months after realizing what he's done. "Thank you. I'm sorry again, Momo."

"That'll be your last, it's fine now." Momo warned him as he fixed his messy hair and wiped away his tears.

"I just have one more question to ask."

"What is it?"

"Have I... been a nice girlfriend to you?"

He stared at Momo's awaiting, curious and softened face. A teardrop flowed for one final time, to drain out every bit of pain he consumed.

He grabbed the back of her neck and gently pulled her close to land a tender kiss on her forehead. "You did more than enough for me, Momo. You're a great woman that I wasted the unconditional love you've been giving by being ungrateful and selfish, and I will forever bring that regret with me."

Momo timidly smiled for him and stepped away from his contact. Wanting to end this emotional moment between each other to avoid ruining the fun night, she came up something to talk with. "I know you have quite shared this with the girls earlier but I just wanted to know myself, how have you been doing these days?"

"I'm good, I'm still on my road to improve myself. I couldn't stand to let others see and continue to be the same guy that you used to encounter." He finally flashed the first bright smile for Momo away from their problems. Momo was proud and touched for his efforts and dedication that she implemented on him. "And you?"

"I'm happy. Even happier now that we've settled things peacefully."

"I've heard from Dahyun that there's this guy who's been seeing you these days, huh. How is he doing for you?"

Momo was taken back that he had to learn about that and mention it. "H-He's fine, but I want to make it clear to him that I don't want to be in a relationship yet." she shyly said.

"How about you? Will you be okay? Are you... gonna look for somebody to have an interest with?" Momo wondered.

"No, I don't think I will." He stated. "I'm not scared, I just want to be careful. I think it's better for me not to engage in this romance thing anymore, you know? I have learnt from my mistakes now." She understood and didn't spoke any further despite still having this pint of pity for the fallen man.

"And... why should I look for other, when you're still the one I choose?"

Momo stared at him, she blushed  and uncontrollably smiled in an embarassed way after hearing that glimpse of the charming YN that never disappeared from him.

She spreaded her arms wholesomely and looked at her with a smile.

"I know I've said that I wanted to disregard your existence but... I didn't want to be cruel now that I've heard your side and I'm sorry for that because I have to admit...

Although you broke my heart, I still couldn't deny the truth that you're one of the most important person I've met and the first man who helped me explore how love could led us into elsewhere.

You still made me happy, YN. I can't just have it easy to throw you out of my life so... should we be friends again?"

He listened to her patiently and it was overwhelming in the end. "I don't deserve this at all, but I'm highly grateful to take it, Momo. Let's start fresh again." He shook his head and smiled.

You accepted her hug one more time and both took time to indulge how great it must felt've again to their part that they don't have to try pretend, carry a hatred, and keep their unspoken troubles for theirselves.

They are now freed from their own personal chaos and has now created a clean slate of their closeness and connection to each other.

They returned back together where they are approached by the girls who've been watching their melancholic yet heartfelt moment they shared in which they paused their fun to express their happiness for their friends on burying the hatchet between each other.

Both learning that they are currently happy with their own lives and has finally washed away their conflict, they realized that somehow helped each other to realize that maybe having a crazy stupid love with somebody was never really required to be happy and contented in life.

#twice #twice momo #momo #hirai momo #twice momo x m reader #twice momo x male reader #twice x m reader #twice x male reader #twice au #twice fanfic #twice one shot #kpop au #kpop fanfic #kpop oneshots

[1975iliwys]

Tourbus cuddles // Ross Macdonald x Reader

A tourbus is small and it’s even smaller when your boyfriend is a giant. You both manage though.

fluff

a/n: i originally wanted to write Matty but my hands and brain wanted Ross

It’s a shit weather today. You still haven’t reached Buffalo and in the next few hours you won’t. It’s a thunderstorm out there, and you hate anything in relation to thunder and lightning. It’s quite good you’re in the tourbus with your boyfriend and friends.

With a blanket draped over you and Ross’ lap, you’re in the third round of UNO with Adam, Polly, John and Gabbriette.

“Do you think we have to cancel the show?” John asks while throwing a 4+ into the round. “Asshole,” Gabby says with a laugh, picking up 4 cards.

“I don’t know, it’s a possibility though if the weather gets even worse.” You sigh at Polly’s answer because you absolutely hate worse. It’s bad right now, but if it gets even worse, you’re staying under the blanket forever.

“Fucking wanker!” Matty screamed at the switch on the table. George breaks out in laughter, “you suck at this game.” Everyone watches them with a smile on their faces. This is home. Those people are your home.

Ross squeezes your thigh and gives you a quick kiss on your cheek before he stands up to go to the toilet. He won the round anyway.

“Hey, plug in my phone will you?” John hands you his phone and his charger. You turn around to the socket and stick the charger in but it doesn’t load. “Is your charger broken?” You ask and try twisting the side of the charger.

“Power is fucking out.” Matty yells from the very front of the bus. This night couldn’t get any better. “This sucks,” John says, “let’s hope when I wake up we’re at the destination.” He gets up and drapes his hoodie over his shoulder. “Good night.” Everyone says their good nights to John and continue to chat about tour.

When Ross gets back from the toilet you take his hand and kiss his knuckles. “I think I’m gonna head to bed as well.” You say and rub your eyes. Ross smiles, nods and takes your face into his hands to kiss you. “Gonna see you in the morning?” He asks and wraps himself up in the blanket. He’s the cutest man ever.

“Yeah, I love you.” You say and wave at everyone. You have the bunk bed above Gabbriette. It’s small and cozy but sleeping in it was terrifying at first. You left the curtain open all the time because you thought you couldn’t breathe in this tiny space. But now you’re laying under 2 blankets with the curtains closed to drown out the noise.

One more look at your phone and you’re in deep sleep. Not so deep actually because you awake at 2:30. You rub your eyes and jump at the loud rumbling of the thunder. You open the curtains and listen further. There is no talking which means everyone is in their bed by now.

Another unpleasant feeling is the sting in your lower stomach. You’ve been on your period for 2 days now, the third day is usually not so bad, but this only occurs to when you’re home and when you sleep in bed with your boyfriend. You have no choice though, the space is as tiny as it gets.

You try hard to fall asleep again but you can’t. You slowly get up to go to the kitchen area to grab a glass of water. When you get back you see Gabbriette on her phone in her bed and Matty’s face in her lap.“You up?” She asks and puts her phone down.

You nod and take a sip of the tap water, “this thunder is scaring me shitless, I’m on my period and I have to sleep in a tiny bed.” She chuckles at your frustrated sound.

“And Ross isn’t with you,” Matty adds which makes you sigh. Gabby gives you a smile. Matty and her usually fall asleep in the same bed but it looks uncomfortable and one awakes with back pain every time.

You definitely can’t take any more pain with what’s going on but you’re willing to handle it if it means cuddling with Ross. “ ‘M sure he wouldn’t mind having a cuddle, he’s whipped for you.” It feels like Matty is reading your mind. You nod and set the glass down onto a small table.

“I’m gonna do that, have a good night guys,” you wink at Gabby and she rolls her eyes at your indication. You walk away from the two of them, towards Ross’ bed, their chatting getting quieter.

Usually Ross also has the upper bed but this tour George really wanted it and Ross didn’t mind switching. His curtain is open and he’s laying on his stomach, hiding his hands under his pillow. It’s better to reach him, with him sleeping on the lower bed.

You can’t slip in because he’s taking up all the space right now. You crouch down and slowly nudge his shirt. “Ross?” You quietly say, “baby,” you try again. This time he stirs and opens his eyes slowly.

He mumbles your name in the dark and then he sees your face, your facial expression being uncomfortable. “Love, what’s wrong?” He says and uplifts himself onto his elbows. He rubs your cheek with his thumb and waits for an answer.

“It’s nothing serious it’s just-“ you pause and let the lightning light up the space. You see Ross’ tired eyes, you feel bad for waking him up. “It’s stupid, I’m sorry for waking you.” He shakes his head and doesn’t let you get up.

“Tell me darling,” his voice barely above a whisper. He lets his hand go through his hair, sleeking it back. You admire his face, and you absolutely adore his beard which he currently scratches.

“I just really wanna sleep in your bed, but it’s tiny and I get it. You’re really tall and I shouldn’t have woken you for this and-“ he cuts you off by scootching closer to the wall side. He lifts his blanket and intertwines your hands.

“Come here,” he whispers. You smile and close your eyes for a second. Then you slip in, not to be spooned but to face him and to nuzzle your face into his chest.

He puts the blanket around you and rests his head on yours. He gives you a couple of kisses and Ross in this state is causing you to become less focused on sleep and more focused on the way his breath sounds so close to your ear. “Thank you,” you say and kiss his shoulder blade.

“Mmhhmm,” he humms from deep in his throat with closed lips. You didn’t think you’d fit and you barely do with your side touching the bar, but you’re here now and that’s what matters.

There is basically no space between the two of you, but you manage to bring your hand up to Ross’ face and cup his jaw. You lean in and press a soft kiss to his lips. Ross doesn’t hesitate to kiss you back.

“Thought you were tired,” he says after pulling away from you, you both smile at each other and then you hide your face in his chest again. “I am,” you mumble.

“Sleep then, we have to get up early.” It should be about 3 now. You’re gonna be tired either way in the morning but it’s not a worry. You ignore his demand and keep on talking.

“I don’t like the weather, how is anyone supposed to sleep with noise like that.” You huff and roll your eyes. Ross snorts at you and rubs your back soothingly.

“Oh so you’re scared, ‘s why you came.” He partly speaks the truth but he doesn’t have to know it. You shake your head, “not scared, just uncomfortable.”

“Alright then,” he totally doesn’t believe you and you know it because you feel the smile on his face. “You good to sleep then?” Ross is on the verge of falling asleep again and you don’t want to keep him up any longer.

“Yes, thank you again baby. I love you so much.” Ross sleepily kisses you again. “I love you so much more,” he swoops his arm around your side and pulls you as close as he can, your bodies not having a centimeter between them.

Both of you close your eyes and another thunder causes you to jump a bit. Ross chuckles and shakes his head against you. “Don’t worry love,” his mouth comes closer down to your ear, “I’ll protect you.”

#ross macdonald #ross macdonald fluff #the 1975 #the 1975 fic #ross macdonald x reader #ross macdonald imagine #Ross Macdonald one shot #ross macdonald x you

[flowerandblood]

The Prince and The Fox (7)

[ modern! • Aemond x friend! • female ]

[ warnings: kissing, fluff, swearing ]

[ description: After the events of her childhood, despite her best efforts, her neighbor and the younger brother of her friend Helaena, Aemond, does not want to know her. This state lasts until a house party organized by his older brother, Aegon, during which an incident occurs that will change their relationship forever. Slow burn, angst, toxic ex-Alys, rough Aemond. This is several anon requests combined into one fic. ]

WARNING: The main plot between the characters takes place in high school. Yes, in high school. The belief that teenagers wait with an intimacy when they are in love in high school is ridiculous to me. Aemond and the character here are the same age. Don't ask me how old they are, in my country you are of the age of consent in your first year of high school and an adult in the last year of high school, so if it is more convenient for you, think about it that way and decide for yourself. In this story, I am not following the trail that they are magically friends right away, but how they become friends and what that even means. I'm writing this fic to give the perspective of young, lost people, not adult women who want to see exactly themselves in everything they read. If that's all you expect, this isn't the fic for you.

I don't want whining about this in my comments or asks. I will delete these and block you. You have been warned.

Aemond + Evans Series Moodboard

This is my first story that has its own playlist, but yes! Get in the mood! Story Music Playlist. Song used in this chapter: Rammstein - Du Hast

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Next chapters: Masterlist

_____

From the day he called her there was a change in him that surprised her. He would come up to her at breaks of his own accord, stand and talk to her, telling her about his day, what he was reading and playing. After what he wrote to her, Alys never spoke to him again and he told her that he felt like a huge stone had fallen off his back.

They often wrote after school, complaining about homework or tests, no longer having the energy to study, tired and discouraged. They usually wrote for hours about nothing, sending each other memes or screenshots of articles they had just read, however, she enjoyed it very much and, most importantly, he enjoyed it too.

They always sat together on the bus listening alternately to his and her playlist. He let her lay her head on his shoulder, himself resting his cheek against her hair.

She knew she was in love with him, had known it for a long time, but she felt that everything was as it should be.

That they were coming closer together in slow, small steps.

He surprised her one day when they were standing at the bus stop. She already knew him enough to feel that he wanted to say something, but as usual he had trouble getting it out. He looked down at his trainers, his hands slipped into the pockets on the front of his black hoodie, his lips tightened.

After a moment, he grunted, not looking at her, she had a feeling his skin was rosier than usual, as if he was hot even though it was cool and unpleasant around them.

"I've been thinking a lot lately." He began, licking his lower lip as if he was carefully analysing the next sentence he wanted to say.

"I…em-well." He paused, as if he had lost the thought. She glanced at him with sympathy seeing how difficult this was for him.

"I figured if you wanted to, I don't know, hold my hand sometimes, or do some other dating shit, I wouldn't mind." He choked out quickly at last, embarrassed, his nostrils moving in an anxious breath, he wasn't looking at her.

She blinked, feeling herself blush, a hot sensation spread throughout her body, a pleasant tickle in her belly. She pressed her lips together, lowering her gaze, embarrassed.

Was he just telling her that he was ready to take things a step further?

That he wanted something more than friendship?

"Okay." She said softly, not knowing what else to add, as stunned by it all as he was, it seemed to her that she had never felt anything like it before in her life.

As usual they sat on the bus together, but this time she had the feeling that he had specially pressed himself tighter against her with his arm, his knee touching hers.

She was hot with emotion so she had to pull her jacket off, and as she returned to her previous position, she placed her hand gently on his.

He looked at her surprised and swallowed loudly, his cheek immediately pressed against her hair as she laid her head on his shoulder, his pleasant scent filling her lungs.

She felt him intertwine their fingers, his Adam's apple waved as he swallowed hard again, his thumb stroking her skin gently in a gesture of such immense tenderness that she felt emotional.

She didn't dare hold his hand as they walked down the shool corridor, she was afraid of malicious comments towards him from others, she knew he only dreamed of sitting in his shadow and never coming out of it.

However, he would sit next to her on the floor during breaks, listening to music with her on his headphones, he made her really like Rammstein, they often listened to her favourite song 'Du Hast'. He would sometimes send her great recordings of their concerts, which she watched with blazing eyes in bed in her bedroom.

What pleased Helaena most about their closeness was that she could spend time with both of them at the same time without fear of conflict.

They often played online games together on the PlayStation, something she hadn't done much before but had become addicted to because of them, also joining in remotely with them via her laptop when she couldn't see them.

She wrote him back quickly without a second thought, knowing that tomorrow was Saturday and she could sit up late with them.

She told her parents where she was going, grabbed a few things to change into thinking that if she stayed up late she would spend the night in Helaena's bed and ran across the street, knocking on their door.

She heard Vhagar's loud, excited barking and then someone's footsteps, Aemond opened it for her and invited her in.

"Hi!" She shouted loudly into the ether looking around for Helaena, she saw him give her a surprised glance, following her into the depths of their living room.

"No…we are alone. Helaena and Aegon have gone off somewhere, my parents are away until Monday." He said looking at her uncertainly, as if he felt he might have inadvertently deceived or confused her in some way.

She blinked, tightening her lips, feeling butterflies in her stomach.

They would be alone.

Like a couple.

"…if you don't want to, then..."

"− no, it's fine. What are we going to play?" She asked pulling her backpack off her back and placing it next to the couch.

They spread out comfortably on the large sofa next to each other with the pads in their hands, browsing through the various online games, unsure of what to play. They usually played as a group of three so they didn't want to continue through the levels Helaena was helping them with.

"How about this?" He asked lowly, opening a preview of a game in which the characters were warriors flying on dragons, fighting in sky battles against other players who were also online. The gameplay was for up to two players.

"Oh, yes, I've always wanted to play this!" She exclaimed excitedly, sliding slightly down in her seat, and he hummed under his breath, starting up the game, waiting for it to load.

They were able to choose their gender, outfits and equipment with great detail and also the appearance of their dragon, so it took them the first hour.

"A bow? Don't you prefer a crossbow?" He asked with some kind of disappointment looking at her choice.

"I want a bow." She burbled undaunted, moving on to her heroine's hair colour and what kind of hairstyle she wanted.

They decided they'd start with training to learn how to control their big sky beasts at all, and it turned out not to be easy to pilot them so that they flew where they wanted, didn't hit each other, and at the same time shoot at their opponent.

"Shit. This is a game for kids aged 12 and up. It shouldn't be that fucking hard." He muttered, clicking the buttons of his pad loudly, as soon as he shot his dragon flew off a bit to the side and the arrow didn't reach his opponent. She sighed loudly at his words.

"We are poor players. I don't know if there is any point in humiliating ourselves by fighting experienced twelve-year-olds who will destroy us after a few seconds." She said amused to watch them both get tired, she heard him chuckle lowly and felt her cheeks blush.

"Yeah. We can check out the exploring cities mode. There are whole maps here. Then the gameplay is about flying to specific points and completing missions." He murmured, quickly clicking something on his pad, switching them from training mode to travel mode.

"Oh, great! I love it!" She said happily, pleased with how nice and detailed the graphics were, their dragons flying side by side and circling over a large, golden city reminiscent of some medieval kingdom.

They played like this for a while, commenting only briefly on what they were doing and the dialogue between the other characters, occasionally getting into fights with someone, but without the control of the dragons it was much easier and they both got caught up in the story. She was surprised and blinked when she suddenly saw him press pause.

She glanced at him questioningly, thinking he had to go to the bathroom or wanted to get himself something to drink, but he just looked at her and slid a little lower on the couch so that their faces were at a similar height.

She could feel the heat in her lower abdomen and her heart beating fast, she felt her cheeks burning, she couldn't hold back a slight embarrassed smile. He hummed under his breath, the corner of his mouth curving upwards involuntarily.

"Wanna kiss?" He asked, and she felt a wave of heat surge through her body, she clenched her thighs together, feeling a pleasant pulsing and tickling between them, she felt like her lungs were filled to the brim.

She nodded her head.

He smiled and reached his hand up to her cheek, his warm, soft, wet lips clinging to hers in a sticky, loud, tender kiss. He pulled away from her for a moment to look at her, and then they embraced and kissed again and again, her hand slipping into his hair, soft and smelling pleasantly of masculine shower gel, she thought with her heart beating hard that he had taken a bath before she came.

She heard him murmur as she felt him reciprocate his kisses, once in a while sucking his lower lip between hers, his hand tightened on the nape of her neck and hugged her tighter, their warm bodies touching.

His hands roamed her cheeks, her hair, her neck and her back and although she felt desire in that touch, it didn't make her uncomfortable, it wasn't intrusive.

She didn't want him to stop.

She felt something begin to happen to her as they both began to breathe loudly, their kisses faster, deeper, more intimate, more greedy, accompanied by the embarrassingly loud sound of their saliva, their fingers pressed painfully tight on their bodies.

"− so pretty −" He breathed out into her mouth and she trembled all over hearing it, feeling as if a pleasant wave of heat had passed through her body, the inside of her core between her thighs pulsed hard, for some reason she felt that she was terribly wet.

"− mhm −" She mumbled only, deepening the kiss thinking only of making sure he didn't stop, that she wanted this, that she wanted him.

That she wanted him to touch her.

He paused for a moment, panting loudly, his nose pressed against her cheek as he felt her take the arm he was embracing her with in her hand and slide it lower, grabbing his wrist.

"− did I do something wrong? −" He whispered in a trembling voice and drew in the air loudly, surprised when she took his hand in hers and gently placed it on her breast covered only by the material of her Tshirt.

"− fuck −" He muttered in shock, involuntarily his fingers tightened tentatively on her soft flesh, she could feel his accelerated breath on her face, that he was looking at what he was doing, where his hand was. "− so soft −"

She felt his words between her thighs, sighing quietly, unable to believe how pleasant it was, how warm and large his hand felt, his touch gentle, full of curiosity, respect and uncertainty.

He kissed her again, still keeping his hand on her breast, kneading it gently, sighing in delight as she struggled to catch her breath, moaning quietly when she felt the tip of his tongue gently brush her upper lip.

"− fuck − mmm −" He hummed quietly, thrusting greedily into her lips, panting loudly along with her, her hand pressed his fingers firmly against her breast forcing him to squeeze her harder and he groaned low right down her throat, her free hand roaming through his hair, his tongue invading deep inside her mouth.

They pulled away from each other, terrified and moved back quickly hearing the sound of a lock being turned and someone's laughter, Aegon talking loudly on the phone.

"She pisses me off, she's always jealous, I don't even get a moment's peace. No, I'm not going back there, I'm already home. Hi little nerds!" He threw them a greeting as he ran up the stairs to the first floor in a few sure strides, and after a moment she heard the sound of his room door closing.

They both swallowed loudly, trying to calm their breathing. She pressed her lips together not believing what had happened, afraid to look at him, not knowing what she should do now. She felt a terrible tension and a throbbing that she didn't know much of what to do about, and she was ashamed to ask him about it, so she just grunted quietly, looking down at her hands.

"Em….so. Shall we keep playing?" He asked in a low, slightly hoarse voice, and she nodded quickly.

They played for a few more hours without saying much, but they sat closer together, their thighs and shoulders touching, she could feel his body with her every move.

Neither of them pulled away, quite the contrary, sometimes when she was waiting for him to move she would lay her head on his shoulder, as she often did on the bus, watching him play and hearing him swallow loudly each time, trying to concentrate on what he was doing.

At some point she felt herself start to fall asleep, it was late but she didn't want to go home. It felt silly to be left without Helaena for the night though and she was afraid that Aegon would tease both him and her later.

That's why she simply laid back in with her face pressed into his neck inhaling his pleasant scent and allowed herself to close her eyes, just for a moment.

"− hey − Foxy − are you asleep? −" She heard him whisper, his warm hand gently stroking her thigh.

"− mmm −" She murmured softly, embracing his arm with her hands, cuddling into him like he was a teddy bear, he was pleasantly warm and smelled of himself, just the way she liked it, it felt good and comfortable. She felt him kiss her cheek a few times.

"Sleep. I'll cover you with a blanket later." He whispered, launching some other game on the pad, apparently a single-player one.

She felt him take his arm from her grasp only to embrace her and hug her close, and she snuggled eagerly into his chest, laying herself comfortably, his cheek resting against the top of her head, all she could hear was the quiet clicking of his pad and the sounds of the game which he had turned down so that she could sleep in peace.

After a while she fell into a deep sleep, squirming in his embrace. Then she felt a sudden emptiness and muttered under her breath discontentedly, searching for him with her hand in the darkness.

She felt someone's lips kissed her hair and stroked her cheek, she smelled his scent, his warm body laid behind her back and embraced her, covering them thoroughly with a warm blanket.

She placed her hands on his intertwining their fingers, his face snuggled into the hollow of her neck, she heard him sigh quietly as if relieved.

She fell asleep.

____

Aemond Taglist:

(bold means I couldn't tag you)

@its-actually-minicika @notnormalthings-blog @nikstrange @zenka69 @bellaisasleep @k-y-r-a-1 @g-cf2020 @melsunshine @opheliaas-stuff @chainsawsangel @iiamthehybrid @tinykryptonitewerewolf @namoreno @malfoytargaryen @qyburnsghost @aemondsdelight @persephonerinyes @fan-goddess @sweethoneyblossom1 @watercolorskyy @randomdragonfires @apollonshootafar @padfooteyes

#aemond fic #aemond fanfiction #aemond targaryen #aemond x oc #hotd aemond #aemond x fem!reader #ewan mitchell #ewan mitchell fanfic #aemond fanfic #aemond fluff #ewan mitchell fluff #aemond targaryen fluff #hotd fluff #aemond #aemond kinslayer #prince aemond #aemond one eye #hotd fic #hotd fanfiction #hotd fanfic #ewan mitchell fandom #aemond fandom #house of the dragon fandom #hotd fandom #aemond smut #aemond targaryen smut #ewan mitchell smut #hotd smut #modern aemond angst #modern aemond smut

[hearts4juzi]

A Shitty Brother Kinda Christmas

(7,441 words)

Evan invites Michael over for Christmas after not speaking to him for over two years now. Shenanigans ensue

Michael was cold.

He was also annoyed and bored and excited and the slightest bit nervous.

But right now, he was just cold.

He was sitting out in the middle of nowhere waiting for a bus that had either already come or was nearly a half an hour late.

He was praying it was the latter.

It didn’t help that he’d had literally no time to prepare. Evan had called him at six in the morning and he’d had to rush to find a gift and means for transportation and it didn’t help that everything was closed for Christmas. So he’d thrown on the only coat he had and went for the first bus he could catch. Now he was stuck out in the snow waiting for a bus that might not even arrive.

But some things were worth getting hypothermia for.

Unfortunately for Michael, this was not feeling like one of those things. But it was a second chance, and he’s fucked up too much to give up on a second chance. Frankly, when Evan had asked for his number, he’d already expected not to hear from him ever again, and he’d made peace with that. As much peace as he could at least. It wasn’t something he thought about a lot, and he doubted Evan thought about it much either.

But today his head’s been full of it, as unpleasant as that is.

When the bus finally pulled up, the driver assured him that the snow was what caused the delay, and apologized profusely. Michael didn’t care, he was just glad it came at all.

The bus was almost entirely empty, which made his life a lot easier. He clicked on his phone, not that there was anything to look at. It was Christmas, after all.

When Evan had invited him, he’d known it would be disappointing to Jeremy; He always looked forward to Christmas, but he promised they’d have their own little Christmas when he got back, but this was the first time he’d spoken to Evan in… Forever. His little brother had a house for god’s sake! A house! And he lived with his friend! That friend who’d punched Michael, the friend who always let Evan stay over his house, the friend he’d totally definitely not gotten into a fist fight with more than once all because of his own stubborn attitude.

So yeah, Michael was a jerk. But in his defense, Gregory was stubborn too.

His phone pinged and he picked it up. It was Evan again. Geez, why did he keep calling? Michael had already agreed, he didn’t want to talk to him right now, not yet.

But he can’t keep putting it off, and he doesn’t wanna seem like he’s avoiding Evan. (Even though he is, technically.)

“Hello? Hello, hello?” He said, “What’s up?”

“It’s me.” Evan said, “Just wanted to make sure you’re doing okay? I’m really sorry it’s such short notice.”

“It’s whatever.” Michael replied, “The bus was late though.”

“It’s Christmas, that’s expected.” Evan replied.

This was weird. Not a bad weird, but not a good weird either.

“Yeah.” Is all he said, “Uhm, is there anything else you need? The service here is ass.”

“Uh, no, I was calling to tell you if the bus hadn’t come to just forget it because I didn’t want you to keep waiting. It’s cold outside.”

“No shit.” He said with a dry laugh, “I’m gonna go now. Bad service, you know how it is.”

“Oh? O-Okay, yeah, bye.” Evan said.

“Bye.” Michael said before hanging up and sitting back against the seat.

“Shitty service?” He mumbled to himself, “Idiot.”

“Well, that sucked.” Elizabeth said. She was hanging decorations she’d brought since their house wasn’t “Christmas ready” in her words.

“He’s probably just tired.” Charlie said, “I’m sure he’s happy you invited him.”

“Well maybe the invitation isn’t what’s got him in the dumps and maybe it’s more the timing?” Elizabeth said.

Evan shrunk back, “I really didn’t notice how close it was getting to Christmas, I just… I couldn’t decide if I wanted to invite him…”

Elizabeth shrugged, “Fair, I guess. I usually invite him over but he spends his Christmas with his friends a lot.”

“His friends?” Charlie asked, “Jeremy?”

“And those other kids from middle school.”

Evan scrunched up his nose, “He still hangs out with those guys?”

“Yeah?” Elizabeth climbs down the small step ladder she was on, “They’re his friends.”

Evan huffs, “Yeah, I know.” He mutters.

Charlie offers a small smile at him, nudging him, “He’s not bringing any of them, it’s just him, Ev.” She says, “I’m sure everything will be okay.”

He nods slowly, “Yeah, yeah I guess.”

“Hey, Evan?” Gregory calls from the other room where he’s helping Sammy set up for dinner.

“O-oh, yeah?”

“Why does Michael do that weird ‘hello? Hello, hello?’ thing?”

Evan blinked, “I… I don’t know, actually.”

“Oh my god he does that all the time I don’t think he even realizes it!” Elizabeth said, “It drives me insane!”

Charlie laughed, “Yeah, Sammy says he does it every time he calls him.”

“He does!” Sammy said, “Every time. I asked him about it once and he was just as confused as me! He just does it. It’s like an instinct.”

Gregory laughed too, “That is funny as hell I’m never letting him live that down.”

“Oh, speaking of living things down,” Evan hopped off his bed and headed to the kitchen, “You’re gonna be on your best behavior. If you and him fight, I’m sticking you both outside.”

“If you put me outside with him I’ll bury him alive in the snow.” Gregory said.

“I’m serious.” Evan said, “I don’t want you fighting with him.”

It’s not that Evan didn’t appreciate Gregory standing up for him, but it was stressful. He didn’t want his friend hurt for him, and he certainly didn’t want to spend Christmas breaking up his brother and his best friend.

Gregory looked over at Evan, “Yeah, of course.” He said, “No fighting.”

“And that means no punching, kicking, swearing, snapping, pushing, shoving-”

“Okay, okay, okay, no fighting.” Gregory said, “But he needs to back off sometimes, I’m gonna let him know.”

“I can let him know.” Evan said, “We’re going to have a nice Christmas like a family!”

They all turned to look at him.

“We’re going to have a nice Christmas like a… decent dysfunctional patchwork family…” He rephrased, “I-I guess.”

Gregory laughed at that, “It’ll be fun, I’m sure.”

“I wish you could’ve invited Nessa,” Evan said, “I’m sure she’d have loved to meet Mike.”

When Michael finally arrived, he was met with the entire house laughing at him. Even Evan couldn’t hide his amusement at seeing his brother pull up to his house soaking wet and shaking like a leaf.

“You look great.” Sammy said.

“Piss off.” Michael muttered.

“Come inside, you look like you’re gonna freeze to death.” Charlie said.

“I feel like it too.” Michael muttered.

They brought him inside and Evan found himself suddenly regretting every decision that led up to this.

He felt sick, and he realized with a shock that there was a reason he had avoided Michael. He didn’t know what to say to him, what to do with him, or what to talk about. What do you say to your big brother who you ghosted for nearly two years after getting his number? What do you say to the person who ruined your life? What do you say to the person who treated you like shit and almost killed you and only formally apologized a couple years ago?

Gregory must have noticed because he discreetly led Evan back to his room and sat down with him.

“Not ready?” He asked.

“Not at all.” He said, flopping onto his back.

“What is it?” Gregory asked, laying down beside him.

“I don’t know. I haven’t spoken to him in forever and I was cool with that but then we did talk again and then we split up again and I just… How can I never speak to him again after that? How can I not give him at least a chance to be better? But at the same time… I don’t want to talk about The Thing, and I don’t want to bring it up but I can’t move on if I don’t and I feel sick thinking about it because what if it goes wrong? What if I fuck it up? What if he fucks it up? What if all this bullshit was for nothing this whole time and I’m just gonna end up hating him more than I already do?”

Gregory listens intently, staring at Evan, “You know, I told you not to invite him.”

“I know but-”

He continues speaking, interrupting Evan, “But! You insisted. Why?”

“Because I want to give him another shot.” Evan said.

“And he came because…” Gregory raises his eyebrows expectantly.

“Because he wants to take that shot.” Evan said, slowly understanding.

“So, you want to give him a chance? You don’t have you, you don’t owe anything to him, especially forgiveness. Do you wanna cut this short? Nobody would blame you if you did. I sure as hell wouldn’t.”

Evan sits up, “I guess.”

Gregory smiles, “Why don’t you take some time, dinner’s not done yet. Nobody’s rushing you, and I’m sure Michael is just as nervous. The only difference is that he deserves it.”

Evan laughs a bit at that, “Be nice.” He said.

“No promises!” Gregory called as he walked out of the room.

Frankly, Gregory was right. Michael was just as nervous. In fact, he wanted to curl up in a ball and sink into a hole and die right about now. He didn’t know where to sit so he ended up standing awkwardly off to the side.

Unfortunately for him, Sammy was quick to act like he owned the place. Gregory and him were like siblings, to be fair.

“Come on Mike, sit down.” Sammy said, “What’s wrong, are you nervous?”

“No. Not at all.” He muttered, “I just prefer standing.”

“Yeah, well, you look out of place with the Christmas decorations and I need to take photos so unless you wanna be my santa clause, I suggest you move.” Elizabeth said.

“You're as blunt as ever.” He muttered.

“Thanks, I try my best.” She replied with a grin.

He sat down next to Sammy, pulling out his phone, only to have Charlie grab it away from him, ignoring the indignant noise he made.

“Aw, Jeremy? Are you guys dating yet?” She teased.

“Wha- no! Give that back!” He lunged, reaching for it, but she snatched it away too quickly.

“Come on, Mike, you’ve gotta have something interesting in your life, how’s my dad?”

“Uncle Henry’s doing fine.” He answered as he continued to chase her around, “Give it back Charlie!”

“What pictures do you have? Aw, is that your dog?” Charlie pulled up a picture.

“No, it’s Jeremy’s! Now give it back!”

“What’s its name?” She asked.

Michael looked over at Elizabeth and exaggeratedly gestured at Charlie, but she just laughed at him.

“She missed messing with you, this is your own fault.” She said.

“She’s right, messing with Evan isn’t as fun. He doesn’t get mad like you do.” Charlie said.

Michael scowled at her, but he couldn’t deny that it made him feel a lot better though. 

When Gregory and Evan returned, Michael offered a smile and a small wave at Evan, that his brother slowly returned.

Evan was pale, but Michael didn’t mention it; He probably was too. Although that could just be from sitting out in the snow for half an hour.

He was still a bit upset about that.

Elizabeth invited him to sit beside her, which ended up sticking him right beside Evan, who had Gregory on his other side, who had Sammy next to him, and then Charlie beside him, and then it came full circle back to Elizabeth.

Great, cool, cool cool cool cool cool. This could go one of two ways:

One, it goes horrible and awful and everything that could go wrong does go wrong.

Or two, it goes fine and Michael’s overreacting.

But he could tell Evan was uncomfortable, and the tension was uncomfortable for him as well.

He took a breath before standing abruptly, “Actually, I ate at home and I could totally just grab a hotel or something so I’m gonna-”

“You’re not leaving.” Evan said.

Michael turned to him, “I’m sorry what?”

Evan shrunk back, “I-I just mean- you can stay here. Uhm… Unless you really don’t want to which is fine but you know you should stay here with us because it’ll make it easier and honestly who sleeps in a hotel on Christmas Eve I mean-”

“Okay! Okay. That- we can do that, that’s fine.” Michael said. He sat back down slowly, staring hard at his plate.

“And I can tell you didn’t eat at home.” Evan said, “I don’t like that you’re lying to me.”

Michael doesn’t reply to that, shrugging.

Evan’s eyebrows furrow, but he doesn’t say anything else. Gregory leans in next to him and whispers something, though.

So it went bad. Not awful, but bad. Michael didn’t eat much, but the food was good. Henry knew how to cook, and it seemed like he’d taught the twins how to cook as well.

Elizabeth leans back in her chair, “So, now that we’ve invited Michael, who wants to send a call to dear old dad? I have his number.”

Evan groans, “Not again with this…”

“Please, please Evan it would be so funny please.” Gregory shot up in his chair, “Please you didn’t let me do it to Michael let me do it to your dad.”

“Do what to Michael?” Michael asked.

“They wanted me to prank call you guys and send you random shit. Gregory, my dad will find and kill us all. I hope you know that.”

Prank call his dad? Prank call the William Afton?

“No wait I like this idea, Ev, we should do it one hundred percent.” Michael said.

“See? He agrees.” Elizabeth said.

Evan rolled his eyes, “You guys are the worst.”

“We’re the best actually.” Charlie said, “And it’s uhhhh… five against one.”

Evan sighed, “Do what you want. I need to set up our room anyway.”

Charlie cheered.

“I actually think I’m still in his contacts.” Michael said, “He keeps texting me, I don’t read 'em though.” He didn’t tell them that he repeatedly hesitated and refused to block his dad for a reason he himself couldn’t fathom. But to be fair, Lizzie hadn’t blocked him either. In fact, she still messaged him back sometimes. Even if the conversations weren’t friendly, he couldn’t imagine talking to his dad ever again, he didn’t know how she did it. 

“And we don’t wanna start today, let’s use Charlie’s phone.” Sammy said.

They spent the night sending random images to William until he blocked them, and then they went on to relentlessly call Jeremy, who had apparently been asleep, before they went on to call Gregory, and stayed on call with him while he and Evan set up.

It was weird how normal this was. It was weird how quickly it had become just spending Christmas together instead of unloading 15 years of bullying and 21 years of loathing.

But then again, they were the Afton family, pretending to be normal was their whole thing. They did it for the first eighteen years of Michael’s life.

But he could sit back and enjoy this before the incredibly uncomfortable conversation that was inevitable. If him and Evan would quit avoiding it.

Gregory then came in to let them know the room was ready.

Sitting down in Evan’s house was one thing. Sleeping in it was a whole other thing. He felt like a teen again, when his dad was in the hospital for one of his springlock accidents and Michael had to stay with Henry while he was gone. That had sucked. His dad hadn’t wanted to bring him over Henry’s house, so he hardly knew Charlie and Sammy, and because of that he’d felt so out of place in their house. Not to mention his siblings were there, and by then he was sick to death of them.

Thinking back on it, he did have a lot of issues as a kid. Maybe he still had them. Who was he to dwell on it, though.

Michael Afton has issues, like that’s news.

This time he made a point to sit beside Elizabeth. She wasn’t the best choice, but she was the only one who still messaged him. Despite how she acted, she always wanted a family. But she got the Aftons, which is more like a classification than a family.

She gave him a disappointed look, but he ignored it.

The decorations in the room were really cool. They had lights strung up on the walls and they’d put up blankets to hang over them, as well as covering up the window. The floor was layered with blankets and pillows, and Michael noticed it looked like a nest.

He had taught Evan how to make nest-like pillow forts when he was only four. Michael had been seven, and hadn’t even been good at teaching, but Evan had really enjoyed it. Michael hadn’t enjoyed teaching him, but it kept the kid quiet and that’s all he’d needed. But this fort was obviously not a product of his teaching, since it was unlikely Evan remembered that.

Weird that he’d remember that. It felt like a karmic “fuck you” from the universe.

Evan was really enjoying this. He didn’t feel as anxious anymore, and it felt almost normal. He had been preoccupied with everything else to think about The Thing and it made him feel a lot better about it. He was also proud of the pillow fort, which Gregory had helped with a lot. They’d had it planned for a while, and he was glad it turned out so well.

Good food, good bed, good friends, and so far no issues with Michael. None that he wanted to talk about yet, at least.

This was a good day! A great day! And hopefully a great Christmas day would follow!

He was quick to pull his friends into it and talk to them about it. He loved how cozy it looked. Like a shiny little nest. It was awesome and he loved it so much.

“Wait. Wait! I need my camera!” He went out to the kitchen, “Gregory? Do you know where I put my camera?”

“I put it in the end table drawer! The bottom one, next to the couch!” Gregory called back.

“Awesome. Thank you!” He grabbed it and ran back into the room, “Mike get in the back you’re the tallest, Gregory and Charlie, I need you guys up front. Elizabeth, get closer to Mike, come on. Sammy, you’re perfect there don’t move. It’s on a ten second timer so hold that for a moment!”

He ran over to them, positioning himself beside Michael and behind Gregory.

He went to grab his camera when it was done, smiling at the picture, “It looks awesome, I can’t wait to print it.” He said.

The others crowded over to see.

“You’re pretty good at sitting still and looking pretty.” Charlie teased Michael, “It’s your one redeeming quality.”

Michael shoved her face away with his hand, “Oh piss off.”

“He said the thing again!” Sammy cheered, “He said it earlier too. I feel like I’m in England every time I talk to him.”

“Did I tell you guys about that time Evan screamed ‘you cunt’ at the top of his lungs?” Gregory said.

“No! No! You promised you wouldn’t tell them about that!” Evan wails, grabbing Gregory’s arm.

“He was playing a racing game or something and he just lost big time. Huge time. Horribly. Awful. It was embarrassing.”

“Gregory!”

“And he just shouted at the top of his lungs. In the most British I’ve ever heard him, it was insane.” Gregory continues, “He had to apologize to our neighbors. It was hilarious.”

Evan covered his face, “It was awful, I felt so bad.” He groaned.

Michael chuckled, “That’s funny, Lizzie was always the one who used British slang. She got it from our father.”

Elizabeth shoved him playfully, “Okay Mr. I-Say-Bloody-Hell-And-Piss-Off-Every-Five-Seconds.”

“Pi- leave me alone!” Michael said indignantly.

“He almost said it again!” Charlie said, laughing.

“Jeez, you people are impossible.” He said.

At that moment, his phone rang. “Oh, shit, it’s Jeremy. I’ll be right back!”

Evan watched Michael leave, his head tilted slightly to the side.

Gregory nudged him, “Feel better?”

“A bit… Thanks.” He answered.

Gregory smiled, “I told you it’d be okay.”

Evan nodded, “I’m stressing out a bit still but I do feel better. Maybe I was just overreacting.”

“Mike is being super weird though.” Elizabeth said, “He’s not usually like this with his friends.”

“Well duh,” Charlie said, “he’s overthinking just as much as Evan is. He’s just shit at hiding it because he’s not a ball of fear and sadness the way Evan is.”

Evan frowned, “Well I wish he’d just act normal. I don’t like that he keeps lying to me. He makes everything harder than it has to be.”

Charlie hummed, “He’s just scared. Like a little animal in the woods.”

Evan couldn’t stop his sudden and loud laughter at that.

But he did feel angry. He wasn’t going to say it, he wasn’t sure he was ready to say it, but he felt it. Michael wasn’t even trying.

“I’m gonna use the bathroom real quick.” He told Gregory.

Michael knew the call wasn’t Jeremy. He also knew it would end long before he wanted it to. It’d been one of his friends from middle school, and they had hung up several minutes ago. But he liked the silence while it lasted.

“So, you’re avoiding me?” Evan asked from directly beside him. 

Michael jumped with a shout, nearly falling off the couch.

“Jesus Christ, Evan!” He gasped, “Don’t do that!”

Evan didn’t react, “Whatcha doin’?”

“Sitting… on the couch?”

Evan’s eyebrows furrowed. He looked like Dad when he did that.

“No, actually,” he said, “you’re being a bum. Alone on Christmas? Come on, we’re heading to bed now.”

Michael nodded, “Yeah, okay.”

They spent the night doing random things. Charlie told some scary stories, they watched a movie, Michael showed them his playing card collection and Evan beat Gregory at war at least ten times, and Elizabeth got a whole console out and they played a few different games.

Of course, the tension did not leave. Everytime he accidentally bumped into Evan or one of them said something a little too… Iffy… it only got thicker.

When he looked over at his little brother, he noticed he was asleep. Him and everyone else.

Well, except for one.

“Can’t sleep?” Gregory asked.

Michael shrugged, “Who can sleep on Christmas Eve?”

Gregory eyed the others, “Them, apparently.”

Michael chuckled, “Yeah, I guess so.” He said.

They fell silent, and Michael laid down on his back, staring at the blankets hung above him.

“You know I don’t want you here, right?”

“Yeah. I know.”

“But he does. Don’t ruin that for him. Or Elizabeth. She said she’s been trying to get you to come over for Christmas.”

Michael stares at him, “I don’t talk to her a lot, I thought she was just being nice.”

“She was.” Gregory said, “I don’t doubt she was. But she still likes talking to you. I don’t know, don’t you think maybe she actually cared if she asked every year?”

Michael scoffed, “I told her every year that I spend my Christmas with Jeremy. Or Henry.”

“Speaking of Henry, what’s he doing for Christmas if Charlie and Sammy aren’t there?”

Gregory sat up, “Charlie said He remarried or something.”

“Really?” Michael said, “That’s… He didn’t tell me that…”

“I might be wrong but that’s what I heard.”

 “Hm.”

Gregory looked over at him, “You’re kind of a loser, you know that?”

Michael stared at him for a moment before he burst out laughing.

Gregory shushed him, “You’re gonna wake them up, shut your mouth!” He hissed.

Michael flopped over on his back, still laughing, though he tried to keep quiet, “You are incredibly blunt.”

“Well, to be fair, I don’t particularly like you very much,” Gregory said.

“I can tell.”

When Gregory heard him go quiet, he glanced over his shoulder.

“Lightweight.”

Evan woke up with a pillow being chucked at his face the moment he sat up.

So he stayed down.

But he could hear Charlie and Michael laughing.

Michael sounded like he’d been doing this for a while, and Charlie kept squealing. The noise was quickly giving him a headache, but it made him feel better about the day, and that’s all he needed anyways.

The day?

Holy shit it’s Christmas.

Evan bolted upright, “It’s Christmas.”

Gregory laughed, “Yeah, it is.”

Elizabeth threw herself on Evan and pulled him into a hug, “Morning sleepyhead!” She said, “You’re the last one to wake up.”

“We’ve been waiting forever.” Sammy groaned, “So I started chucking pillows at you and seeing if you’d wake up.”

“I told him not to.” Gregory said.

Evan smiled, “You guys are amusing. Has anyone made breakfast?”

Charlie points at Michael, “I told him to.”

Michael pushes her finger away from his face, “And I told her that I have not cooked something edible since I was 15.”

Elizabeth shuddered, “That lasagna was not edible.”

“Har har har.” Michael muttered, “at least I tried.”

Charlie sat up, “Me and Sammy made dinner, it’s someone else’s turn.”

“I vote Greg does it.” Sammy said.

“What? Why me?” Gregory whined, “I always do it!”

“I’ll make it.” Evan said.

“I’ll come help.” Elizabeth jumped to her feet.

She grabbed Michael’s arm, “I’ll show you what edible actually means.”

Charlie waved Michael goodbye with a smirk on her face as he scowled.

Evan took out the stupid cinnamon rolls in the weird circle can thingy? He didn’t know anything about them but they were good so who cares.

Michael frowned, “This is breakfast?”

“You look like you live off ramen noodles, shut up and enjoy Christmas dinner as it should be.” Evan said.

Michael blinked a few times.

“… You don’t… You don’t actually live off noodles, do you?”

“…”

So Evan learned several unpleasant things about Michael’s eating habits.

But so far, so good. He’d only felt soul crushing anxiety twice since Michael got here!

So… Good?

He wasn’t sure but it wasn’t bad so that had to mean something.

Despite joking around, Evan was a bit irritated. Michael was still being weird and it didn’t help that Elizabeth clearly didn’t understand the tension.

“You two are too quiet, come on, it’s Christmas.” She said, “Loosen up!”

“I’m just tired, Liz.” Evan said.

She flicked his forehead, earning a yelp from Evan.

“Well, don’t be, it’s Christmas!”

He didn’t like how much this reminded him of home. He didn’t like that this reminded him of his sister avoiding and ignoring his problems or his brother never listening to him.

They were all so different, but some things never change.

Unpleasantly, his mind drifted to his dad. But he pushed those thoughts away. He didn’t know why he always thought of his dad when he talked to his siblings.

“Evan, it’s done.” Elizabeth said, “Do you wanna frost it?”

Evan nodded, “While they’re still hot.”

She smiled at him, “Then we can open gifts? You’re gonna love what I got you, I promise.”

No, his siblings were nothing like his dad. No doubt they have pieces of him in them—No doubt Evan did too—But they were not him.

Maybe he could learn to live with those pieces. He’d done it with Elizabeth.

But it was just so much harder with Michael. Even now, when they were laughing and pretending to be okay, he felt dissatisfied. He wanted more than this, he wanted reassurance that his brother actually wanted to change and didn’t just feel bad. What if Michael was doing this for himself? To make himself feel less guilty? Less at fault?

As cruel as it sounded in his head, he found himself regretting giving Michael this chance. He didn’t deserve closure, not when it had taken Evan over a decade to get his own closure. He knew Michael was trying, but why did he get to decide when this change of heart came along? Why did he get to decide when this ended?

He settled in his seat beside Gregory, who was talking to Charlie and Sammy. Elizabeth was quietly talking to Michael, and Evan stayed quiet. He had things to think over. A lot.

When they finished, Charlie and Elizabeth practically dragged him to the tree.

Michael hung back, and Evan felt a twinge of… Something. Sadness? Anger? He didn’t know. But it was something.

Elizabeth insisted he opened hers first, so he did. It was a camera. Except it was yellow and had little bear ears and…

“It’s Fredbear!” He exclaimed, “It’s so cute! Oh my god, Lizzie, this must have taken forever!”

“Charlie helped with it,” She said.

He looked it over, “And it’s brand new… Smile!” He pointed it at Elizabeth and Charlie, snapping a photo quickly, “Oh my god, I love it, Liz.”

She grinned, “I knew you would.”

Gregory smiled at Evan, pushing a small box closer to him.

Evan unwrapped it slowly, before slamming it down and giving Gregory a playfully harsh look, “You did not.”

Gregory laughed, “I really did.”

He held up the sweater, “This is so dumb I’m gonna wear it for the rest of my life.”

The sweater was black with a skull on it, but it was sporadically decorated with random Christmas things. It looked so strange and out of place and he loved it.

Of course he got Gregory an equally ugly sweater, one with flowers on it, but the middle of the flower was replaced with Glamrock Freddy, one of the characters made for Fazbear Entertainment after his father had sold it off in response to the horror rumors about it.

Evan knew they weren’t true, but they still made his skin crawl sometimes.

Sammy bought him a crochet kit, with a bunch of colors for him and Gregory to mess with. He must have remembered Evan mentioning that he wanted to pick it up as a hobby.

They continued exchanging gifts, and Michael was quiet for the most part, as if he was dreading something, which Evan found amusing; of course he was nervous, he’d had one day to find thoughtful gifts for people he hardly spoke to.

Suddenly, just as Evan was going to stand, Michael tossed something to him, and he jumped in surprise.

“I didn’t know what to get you, to be honest. I, uhm, I hope this isn’t a shitty gift…” Michael said, “I also hope it doesn’t like… ruin your day… it’s a hit or miss, so I’m taking a shot.”

Evan blinks a few times, “Alright…”

He carefully unwraps the gift, gasping softly when he sees it fully.

The fur is worn, and the stitches are messy—the handiwork of his uncle, no doubt—and one of the ears has a hole in it, but there’s no mistaking it.

It was Fredbear.

The original plushie.

The one he hadn’t seen since he moved out of his dad’s house.

He’d had another, one that Gregory’s dad had made for him, but it’d never been quite the same. It also didn’t talk to him.

… Well maybe that was a good thing.

He didn’t take his eyes off it as he spoke softly, “Where… did you get this?” 

“Dad sent it to me since he didn’t have contact with you. He didn’t give me a chance to say I didn’t either. Henry patched it up and it’s just been collecting dust for the past few months.”

He stared at it. It reminded him of a lot of things. The animatronics on stage that terrified him, being bullied, his nightmares, his dad, The Thing, meeting Gregory, that day he broke his ankle, that time Mike almost hit him with his car his first time driving it, when he spent that first night with Gregory, and so many other things.

“Huh…” He said.

“Is it… a good gift…?”

“Yeah, yeah I missed him.” He said, “Thank you.”

Michael smiled.

Elizabeth stood up, “Well, that was sweet,” she said, “let’s get this picked up now.”

They all groaned, and Lizzie clicked her tongue, “Come on, guys, this isn’t our house, we can’t trash it and leave.”

So they picked up. It wasn’t hard, but at some point Charlie bumped into Elizabeth, who playfully pushed her away, and then that ended with the two of them wrestling each other to the ground. Sammy jumped in and for a moment Evan thought Gregory would too, but he didn’t.

So the two of them just continued cleaning while Charlie squealed. And he glanced over at Michael.

He was picking up alongside them, and Evan couldn’t stop himself from laughing a bit.

Michael frowned, “What? What am I doing?”

“Nothing, nothing, it’s just funny that you’re cleaning. We were lucky if Dad got you to pick up a sock, much less your room, much less Henry’s house.”

Michael scoffed, but didn’t say anything.

Thanks for participating in the conversation, I’m glad we’re talking. Evan thought sarcastically.

Gregory looked like he wanted to say something, but he bit his tongue when Evan gave him a look.

“No fighting, I know,” He muttered.

God this sucked a lot.

Michael didn’t know what to say. And he was annoyed that Evan would bring that up. He got so much shit from his dad for not picking up his room, but he could never bring himself to care. He’d hated that house, he’d hated his dad, he’d hated his siblings, and god he’d hated his little brother.

Not that he knew exactly why, though.

His thoughts were interrupted by Elizabeth grabbing his arm, “It snowed last night, do you guys still get snow over in Utah?”

“What? Of course we do!” He said, “Why wouldn’t we?”

“I don’t know, you seem so grumpy I thought you must have never experienced a good thing in your life.” She said.

Evan winced and Michael frowned, “I’m not grumpy.” He said.

“Sure, as if you haven’t been moping around. You know, if you were just going to sulk this whole time you shouldn’t have come,” Elizabeth crossed her arms, “Nobody forced you to come, but you’re acting like this is the worst place to be right now.”

“I’m just… nervous…” He said slowly.

“Nervous? About what? You came because you wanted to see us, didn’t you?” She challenged, “You’re just being dodgy today, I don’t know. You just nudged gifts to us and mumbled ‘thank you’ and hung back, why aren’t you at least trying to participate?”

“I am trying! I’m just not feeling it, okay? Why do you even care, you’re not the one who invited me!”

Elizabeth scoffed, “I invite you every year and every year you shut me down, but not Evan? Is this even about him? Because it feels like it’s about you!”

Michael stared at her, “I’m trying my best!”

“Avoiding us is your best!?”

He fell silent. One look at Evan and Gregory told him they had been thinking the same things.

Goddammit.

He really had been neglecting his sister, hadn’t he? It’s not that he meant to, it’s just that he didn’t know how to talk to her. Her life fell apart pretty quickly once their father’s parenting… declined… but even then she still reached out to their father. Whether she actually thought he could change or if she was just doing it for herself, though, he had no idea.

He was trying to settle these things one at a time! why did he have to fuck up with both his siblings?

“She’s not wrong.” Gregory said, “You’ve been weird lately, and it’d be much easier for everyone if you just… I don’t know… talked? You’re not getting anywhere sneaking around like a dog.”

Michael felt his anger spark at that, “I’m not sneaking around! And don’t call me a dog!”

Elizabeth clenched her fists, “Well if you were really here to make amends, you’d put some effort in, but instead this feels more like a shitty way of getting closure and making yourself feel better-”

Evan stepped forward then, “Okay, that’s enough!”

“-And maybe if you hadn’t almost killed Evan he wouldn’t hate you so much!”

The whole room fell silent.

Evan stared at her, “Elizabeth…”

“It’s true!” She said, “It’s true! He’s always done this! You just avoid us, you shut us out, like that will help, and then you come crawling back for forgiveness so you don’t feel like shit about it!”

“Elizabeth!” Evan shouted.

She turned to look at Evan, and they locked eyes for a moment. She sighed, “I’m going… To go to the gas station for a bit. Call me if you need me.”

Michael watched her go, silent. His gut was twisting and he felt sick.

He was a shitty brother all around, wasn’t he?

He couldn’t even get his sister to like him. Not that he’d tried very hard. Elizabeth made herself feel untouchable. She avoided her brothers because she didn’t want to be caught in the middle of whatever they were doing. She hadn’t been talking about Evan, not entirely. She was probably lonely, he realized.

He looked at Evan, “I didn’t… I’m… I’m sorry…”

Evan stared at him, “Do you want to talk about It? Now?”

Michael laughed, but it was dry and humorless, “No, but I’m willing to, if you want to.”

“We’ll leave you guys alone.” Charlie said, grabbing Gregory and Sammy and pulling them away.

“Liz is right, you’re not really proving anything other than the fact that you feel bad. Which is… It’s annoying.” Evan said, “I know you feel bad, I’ve known that since I got out of the hospital when I was ten, Mike. I don’t need to know you feel bad, I need to know you care and want to make an effort to change.”

“Well, I am trying I just-”

“Don’t know how?”

Michael looked up at him.

“...Yeah.” He said softly, “I don’t know what to do, I hardly know you guys anymore.”

Evan sat down beside him, “None of us do, it took Elizabeth years to even look at me, and even longer for us to finally start actually talking. There’s a lot of things we can’t fix. Elizabeth will always be blunt, that will never change. It’s something she got from Dad. She can’t help that, but she can make it better.” He looked up at Michael, “And I think you can, too. If you just talk to me, but you won’t. And that’s making it hard. I don’t want to push you or bother you but I really really need to just… understand this.”

“So… About The Thing…”

“Yeah, The Thing. Me almost dying, you putting my head into heavy machinery? That Thing?”

“Yeah.”

“I… I still have the scar, you know? It healed over pretty well though, head wounds do that. But I still dream of it, you know. Do you have nightmares?”

“Of seeing my little brother’s head get crushed like a grape? Yeah,” He took a deep breath, “Hard to forget that when I spent at least five minutes staring at it.”

Evan stares at the floor, “... I don’t even remember when it happened. I didn’t feel it at all. Not until I woke up, at least.”

He takes a deep breath, “I… Can I just ask you why?”

“What?”

“Why did you do all that? Why did you treat me like that?”

Michael fell silent. He never talked about the why. It’s not that he didn’t know. He knew. He had known since he started, since he watched his brother’s skull get crunched in front of him.

“I thought it was funny,” He said, “I didn’t like that Dad did all that shit to me. He obviously enjoyed it, and I enjoyed doing it to you. Some kind of fucked up stress relief, I guess.”

Evan stares at him, looking hurt, “That’s brutally honest.”

“You said you didn’t want me to lie to you.”

Evan nodded, “Yeah.”

They sat in silence for a bit, before Evan spoke.

“I don’t know if I want to forgive you or not,” He said, “It’s not that… It’s not that I don’t think you’ve changed but… I still have nightmares. I still remember these things that happened to me and they… they suck. But sometimes I feel like a jerk because I know you’re trying and I know you don’t get why this is so hard for me but… But I really hate you. I hate that you are here for closure, I hate that you are here at all. But I invited you.”

“I think I do get it.” Michael said.

“Hm?”

“I… I haven’t blocked Dad yet, did you know that?”

“Really? I blocked him the day I moved out.” Evan said.

“I keep not wanting to. I keep thinking, ‘what if something happens? What if I need to talk to him?’ even though I know that’ll probably never happen.”

“So I guess I can get where you’re coming from. In a weird twisted way, you know? I don’t know how to cut him off, but I don’t know how to talk to him. It’s like there’s a door open in front of me and I’m too scared to walk through it but what if I close it and it locks? What if there was something good in there?”

Evan doesn’t take his eyes off Michael, before he says, “Give me your phone.”

Michael blinks at him, tilting his head, but he slowly hands Evan his phone, “What’re you doing?”

“Blocking Dad.”

“What!? Did you not hear anything I just said?” He reached for his phone, but Evan was quicker and pulled away from him.

“There’s nothing behind that door, Michael.” He says, startling Michael with his intensity, “Nothing that you want or need. You left that room forever ago and you deserve to stay out of it for the rest of your life. You and Liz.”

Michael watched him and his hand dropped back to his side.

Maybe Evan was right. Maybe there was nothing behind that door. Maybe he was just wishing there had been something in that room. It’s like he was closing and opening it in hopes for something new.

“...Thanks.”

“Always available for cutting off shitty family members. I’m incredibly good at it.”

Michael laughed, “... Yeah… you are.”

Evan stood up, “I think that’s enough for now, I don’t know if I forgive you, honestly.”

Michael shrugs, “Eh, that’s not the most of my worries,” He says, “I guess this was something of a test run?”

“If it was, I think it turned out okay.”

When Elizabeth got back, Michael took her aside to talk to her. Evan didn’t listen in, but he knew what they were talking about, and he did indeed see them hug tightly. It wasn’t Evan’s business. He left it alone.

So things weren’t fixed. But they were better. They had wrapped old wounds. Nothing was healed, but they weren’t bleeding anymore, and that was good.

The rest of the day was fun. Elizabeth insisted Michael stayed, but he had to go home eventually, and there was a mutual understanding that he needed some time alone after all that. It was overwhelming, and Evan was definitely done with seeing his family for a bit. They weren’t friends, but it was something.

He watched Michael walk outside, where Jeremy had come to pick him up.

“Hey, Mike?” He called.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for coming.”

Michael smiled at him, “Thanks for letting me.”

Not forgiveness, and in the end he would always prefer the family he’d made for himself, but otherwise this went well.

That being said, he was never inviting that many people over for Christmas again. He should’ve gotten them together for Thanksgiving instead.

Gregory pulled Evan back inside, “Dude, it’s freezing, come inside.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Gregory looked inside, “This place is a mess. What happened to ‘we can’t make a mess and leave it’?”

Evan laughed.

#im participating in the thawing of Mariah Carrey and I'm not sorry #Christmas #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #my writing #michael afton #evan afton #no specific au #elizabeth afton #charlie emily #sammy emily #gregory fnaf #really hope u guys like this i spent forever on it #no beta reader bc im impatient #some of the characterization might get choppy but to be honest i really really enjoyed writing this #afton brothers #flashlight duo

[pippin-katz]

Like A Love Song

Pairing: M/M | Crossover Ship - Marco Peña/Johnnie Blackwell Media: The Kissing Booth 2 (2020), High Strung (2016) Rating: T (for language) Word Count: 2,098

Marco is having a shitty day and goes to the park with his guitar to relax, but ends up having an interesting interaction with the attractive violinist who plays at the same spot.

A/N: I literally wrote this in a fit of inspiration and need for a romcom short story, but it came out pretty nice, so I thought I'd share here! Enjoy!

As the subway slowed to a stop, Marco lifted his wrist up to read his watch. He read 1:26 and heaved out a heavy sigh as he stepped off the subway car onto the platform. His guitar bounced against his back as he made his way up the stairs. The breeze greeted him by playing with the dark curls resting on his forehead, but the sun was nowhere to be found. It seems that it was aware of Marco’s melancholy mood and opted to spend the day behind the clouds in solidarity.

His day had been unpleasant since he woke up twenty minutes late that morning. In his haste to catch the bus to campus and make it to class on time, he hadn’t been able to brew himself a cup of coffee and forgot to put his laptop back into his bag after studying the night before. He ended up being forced to take notes by hand, leaving it cramping and sore afterwards, as well as giving him a wicked headache. Such pain had been a hindrance to practicing for his thesis performance in the following class.

Music and migraines don’t mix well. After only an hour, his professor had noticed his lack of progress and given him a pitying look. Marco couldn’t remember the last time he felt so embarrassed as they suggested he take the rest of the day off.

He had taken the advice, intending to purchase lunch from his favorite food court restaurant, only to discover that it was closed for some reason. He’d settled for a lackluster protein bar from the vending machine.

That’s what led up to where he was now, begrudgingly exiting the subway station. As silly as it was, all the obstacles and inconveniences caused a lump to form in his throat and heat to prickle behind his eyes. Marco was disappointed, exhausted, and hungry, and all he wanted to do was relax, even if it was only for a few hours.

Despite the lack of sun, it was pleasant outside. The subway station he’d gotten off at was next to a park that he often visited when he needed fresh air. Sometimes he brought his guitar with him and played whatever he wanted, not caring about anything, and letting the music take him wherever it led. If he was lucky, occasionally someone would drop some change or bills into his open guitar case. He didn’t play for tips but being a college student with a major in music, he never turned them down. Overall, it was an enjoyable experience.

There was only one problem: Hot Leather Jacket Violin Guy.

He was exactly what he sounded like. He was tall and pale, with dark hair that swooped down to fall just barely over his eyes. His lips were full and looked absurdly soft. He always wore casual alternative clothing that was typically topped off with the leather jacket his nickname implied. The final piece was, of course, the aforementioned violin. It was a dark brown that looked nearly black, and though Marco was certainly no violin expert, he could tell it was one of high quality; it was definitely not bought from an everyday music store. He was good, really good. The sound that came from it was richer than any other he’d heard. Every note seemed to sing with emotion.

Hot Leather Jacket Violin Guy was stunning, incredibly skilled, and Marco fucking hated him. Well… sort of.

There was no logical reason for it. Despite making eye contact a few times, they’d never spoken to each other. It wasn’t as though Violin Guy had done anything to warrant his hatred. All he did was stand in the same spot every day, look unfairly beautiful, and play the violin. Maybe that was all he needed to do for Marco to dislike him; maybe if he stopped and thought about it for a few minutes, he’d be able to chalk it up to projecting his own insecurities onto the handsome stranger.

However, on this particularly shitty day, he couldn’t care less. Marco was not someone who asked for much. He didn’t find himself asking some divine power for favors regularly, but today all he wanted was for Hot Leather Jacket Violin Guy to not be at the park.

Luck was not on his side, as should have been evident to him from the events of the day leading up into this moment. Marco trudged along the sidewalk to his favorite spot in the park; it was a coincidence that it was the same place Hot Leather Jacket Violin Guy played. There was a small fountain with tables around it. The concrete turned into pretty tiles, making it look like a little plaza. It was by far the best part of the park in his opinion, and he wasn’t going to let some brooding violinist with a pretty face ruin that for him.

That was his thought process as he approached the fountain. The soft sound of running water was accompanied by the telltale notes of the violin, allowing him to hear the other man’s presence before he could see him. Marco rounded the fountain and was greeted with the visual of the violinist; he pointedly refused to acknowledge if his heart sped up.

As usual, Violin Guy was wearing some ripped black jeans, a band t-shirt, and his signature leather jacket. His eyes were closed as he let his bow glide across the strings, and there was a barely noticeable sway in his body as he played.

Marco recognized another musician with true passion for their craft easily, which only made him more annoyed. It was harder to justify his distaste for the guy when he shared a musical soul. He sighed as he shook his head and wandered over to sit under a tree.

Marco’s hands were still a bit sore from class that morning, but it wasn’t unbearable, and he wasn’t planning to play anything difficult. He methodically removed his guitar from his back and set the case down in front of himself. He moved slowly as he unzipped it, retrieving the instrument.

The guitar’s wood was familiar and smooth under his fingertips. Its cool surface was soothing. He plucked a few notes experimentally, adjusting the tightness of the strings to find the perfect pitches. Once everything was properly tuned and prepared, Marco closed his eyes and exhaled.

Stress and anxiety had been clinging to him all day like a soaking wet blanket, weighing him down and sticking to him uncomfortably, but when he focused on the cool breeze on his skin and the sounds of nature around him, it slowly melted away. His fingers moved on their own as he strummed and plucked whatever notes called to him. He let his melancholy mood move his music rather than forced himself to play something more upbeat; fighting negative emotion was a waste of time. The improvised melody reflected his mental state perfectly.

Marco sighed as he paused at the end of a phrase, feeling as blue as the cloudy sky overhead. It really had not been a good day.

That’s when he heard the melody echoing back to him through the voice of the violin a few feet away. Marco looked up from his seat on the grass, eyes landing on the Violin Guy, who was standing a little closer than he had been before.

Instinctively, Marco scowled. What? Did this guy think he was better than him? Was he playing the same tune just to demonstrate how much lovelier it sounded when he played it?

As Violin Guy played, he glanced his way, making deliberate eye contact. Marco felt himself freeze under his gaze, unable to look away as he listened to solemn notes come from the other man’s instrument. He captured the same sadness that Marco had originally played with, but then he added to the tune. When he listened very closely, he could hear an almost questioning tone underlying some of the notes.

The man met his gaze again as he paused, his expression neutral but eyes expectant. Tingles ran up and down his spine; it was a question. Marco looked down at the guitar in his hands. He debated for a moment. For some reason, Violin Guy had noticed his negative mood and chose to approach him, speaking a musical language that only they understood. Marco didn’t know why he was doing this, but he would be lying if he wasn’t curious about the man. This was his opportunity. He poised his fingers to answer.

He licked his lips as he concentrated, plucking out a slightly different melody. His disappointment and exhaustion bled into the music. Marco closed his eyes, furrowing his eyebrows as he felt it all flow through the guitar. When he finished the phrase, he turned his head toward the violinist.

Violin Guy gave him a tiny nod, so small that Marco wasn’t sure if it was a nod at all. Then he raised his bow to the strings once more and spoke back. A series of notes floated through the air. They were soft, maintaining a somewhat melancholy feeling, but there was a twist in them. It was something hopeful and kind that made Marco’s chest expand and his eyes grow hot. Against all odds, his lips quirked up just a little bit as he listened to the sweet sound of the violin.

He met the man’s eyes again, his own widening as he received a small smile in return; he didn’t think he had ever seen Violin Guy smile before. He nodded down to the guitar as he continued to play, the tune becoming more hopeful as he continued. It was an invitation.

Marco felt his throat close up as his cheeks warmed, but despite the nerves, he began to play along. He was hesitant at first, but the two instruments blended beautifully as they performed their impromptu duet. There was so much feeling and personality in each sound, but somehow, they came together in just the right ways to create a masterful melody. Marco’s lips grew into a true smile as the frustrations of the day left his mind. His playing grew livelier, brighter, and by the time they finished their little song, he couldn’t even remember why he was so upset to begin with.  

He beamed at the violinist as he lowered his guitar back into his lap, and the other man looked down bashfully, nervously tapping his thigh with his bow. Then he straightened his posture and stuck his chin out a bit. He made eye contact with Marco and walked directly up to him without pausing.

Marco’s eyes widened as he was offered a hand. Uncertainly, he tried to meet him in a handshake, but the violinist grabbed his wrist instead, making him gasp. He tucked his violin under his arm and fished into the pocket of his leather jacket. Marco found himself unable to speak as he pulled out a pen. He opened it with his teeth and quickly scribbled onto his skin.

When he finished, he released Marco’s hand and cleared his throat. His pale cheeks had grown quite red. He opened his mouth to say something but changed his mind. He closed it, and instead nodded to him before turning to walk away, pretending as though he was unbothered when the opposite was obvious. Marco blinked rapidly, frozen for a moment. His skin still tingled from the other man’s touch. He looked down at the writing, his heart leaping as he recognized a phone number.

There was also a note underneath the digits. His cheeks flushed with heat as he grinned shyly to himself. The man had written: “I hear music when you smile. – Johnnie”

Marco looked up to see the violinist, Johnnie, with his violin packed away and posed to leave. He rubbed the back of his neck, figure tense as he kept glancing between him and the ground. Marco flashed him his most dazzling smile, and the tension in his shoulders disappeared as relief washed over his expression. He raised his hand to give him a small wave as he began to walk away. Marco returned it enthusiastically and watched with his grin still in place as he left.

Once Johnnie was gone, he ghosted his fingertips over the ink on his wrist. He pulled out his phone and created a new contact with the number. Marco inputted his name but tapped to add a note. He couldn’t help but laugh to himself as he typed: Hot Leather Jacket Violin Guy <3

#fanfic #crossover ship #marco peña x johnnie blackwell #the kissing booth 2 #marco peña #taylor zakhar perez #high strung #johnnie blackwell #nicholas galitzine

[thesamoanqueen]

Blackwater V

Raiting: 16+

Warnings: Something, tragic past(?)

A/N: I was not in the mood honestly, so Im not so sure. A lot of errors but the show must go on and probably I’ll correct this chap in future. Im sorry?

Tree after tree followed around him, tall and dark like ghosts, their twisted roots curling the ground like the withered fingers of a hand. His heart was pounding frantic in his chest, his own breathing along with the reserve sounds in his ears, his muscles tensing and his body pumped with adrenaline. The air was intact, clean, the ground covered with a thin carpet of grass and damp moss that alternated with strips of yellowish gravel. There were fallen logs, ditches, boulders coming out of nowhere, it was the area of the reserve that no one was allowed to go to and that he preferred. His family guarded that place as a sanctuary, an island in the midst of their own island, which he would one day pass down to his Bloodline.

Until a week ago he would never have thought of going there with someone, honestly he would not have even thought of going there. His stops at home were short, always full of commitments and meetings, the races were few, but this time it was all different. Tonight he needed it and had someone to share it with.

Run. Run.

He dug his paws into the ground, claws pulling, muscles burning from the physical exertion.

She was fast, faster than him and she wasn't holding back on proving it. She seemed to ignore every basic principle within a pack, she didn't act like an omega, she didn't respect positions, didn't listen to calls, she was anything but submissive and gregarious as someone born like her should be. She jumped between trees following her own path, grinding yards and yards without looking back and with his head down, Roman continued in her trail, guided by the pure instinct of his wolf. For him the rest of the world had vanished, sucked beyond the Blackwater reserve. There was only his mate, the desire to reach her and force her to stop, that childish and visceral game that was wearing him down like a hunt. Her scent was a speed lane and more time they spent together, more irresistible it seemed.

They passed his family's land in a few minutes and then the circle that separated it from the rest of the reserve. The sound of the river reached him darkly through the trees and he called to her with a low howl that should have slowed her, but Y/N didn't hear him, she didn't even turn to check. It was as if she didn't hear and didn't care.

Stay. Stay.

The trees began to diminish, more sounds reached him though it was still night, he called to her again in a low rumbling howl, but something else caught their attention and Y/N made yet another sharp turn, heading west. It was a frenetic and non-stop race, but in the end the long row of trees that had covered them up to that moment suddenly stopped, giving way to a strip of raised asphalt. The reserve ended there.

Out.

He brought his black muzzle to the road, panting, ears turning over his head and sniffed the air. There were other smells here from the city spreading out to the bay, a van must have passed with mud on its wheels facing away from them, the almost vanishing trail of a bus and the distant trail of the base beyond bend of the river. They were further away than he had planned and certainly, he hadn't planned on passing by there after the unpleasant discussion with his Wise man.

He felt Y/N muzzle against his neck, unexpectedly and straightened up, looking down at her from the inches between them as she lowered her forelegs and snapped her teeth. She bit his shoulder, slowly, without sinking into his flesh, her eyes sharp and Roman reciprocated by pulling her ear. Body still charged with adrenaline. She had made him run to vent his nerves and it was a strange, new feeling. Something vague inside him seemed to find peace in those challenges.

Mate.

***

The city was still asleep at that hour. The streets were almost completely empty, a couple of vans with sleepy drivers and yellowish headlights, a bus now without passengers waiting in front of a parking lot. She watched it from a distance, noises in the silence that surrounded it and a shiver made her shoulders move.

She had spent most of her life on the road and some of those trips on buses. On ruined seats that stank of everything, with legs curled up in the little space available, together with her always ready suitcase, watching the streets pass past the windows one after the other. Omegas weren't seen well by people if they hinted more than what society allowed and always made questionable ends. She had never been able to afford to stay too long in one place, once or twice in some more populated city where people paid less attention, but eventually someone always came knocking on the door. They thought she was vulnerable, weak by herself and with that smell and although she knew how to defend herself, after adolescence it had become exasperating to do it all the time. She had gotten used to living on the road, without a routine, without getting too attached, without forging bonds. She could fall back into line, find a replacement pack, sure, but just the idea of those things hurt her heart. Her father wouldn't have wanted that life for her.

And now she was there, looking at a bus that had represented almost all of her life, one of the last that she would have to take to make the last journey and return to where she was born.

Stay. Rest. Good for us. Mate.

- I was born here. The twins and I used to go up to the beach away from our parents, there were things we couldn't do with them around – Roman's voice didn't surprise her, she'd heard him coming, but the jacket he draped over her shoulders did.

It smelled like him and Y/N squeezed it without thinking too much, she didn't even realize she was cold. It was strange, the temperature didn't justify those chills, she was in Florida after all, but her physical health had been acting up for a week. And her mind wasn't in better shape, for some reason those informations seemed… strange: Hadn't they made him be born under a tree on a full moon night with some Lion King-style ritual? And what was that stuff about limitations?

- Your father didn't let you flirt with girls? Isn't that something they encourage to do? - she asked curiously, seeing him nod in amusement at that dig.

Alphas in general tended to pass on traits that were dominant as far as she knew and not necessarily ethically correct. It was pure natural selection, and based on that, she imagined the leader of a pack encouraging his son, his heir, to prove dominant in one of the most mundane ways nature had ever conceived.

- Pops didn't want me to get in trouble. He had his reasons, mom too, I had to set an example. And I've had my moments, especially with the twins. - she heard Roman admit with heavy breathing, but a look still amused and her mind immediately went to Jimmy and Jey’s stories.

As far as she knew, calling them moments was an understatement. Those two had told her about cataclysms and for the most part the walking terror, was him. It was almost unthinkable looking at him now to believe that as a kid anyone had to fix his woes or any he might have done.

- I've heard a couple of stories, but nothing about girls – she smiled, looking at him with a hint of suspicion that made him tilt his head.

- Sometimes they know when to stop.

- Don't scold them, they're not the ones constantly growling - she stopped him, defending the twins and Roman frowned, his hands hidden in the pockets of his sweatshirt, looking a little less relaxed.

- And they don't have all the pressure I have, providing for an entire family is less simple than anyone imagines. If I did like them, everything would be ruined.

She knew for a fact that Jey and Jimmy weren't slacking off, but she also understood what Roman was referring to. Giving orders, standing in his place, might have seemed easy to someone, Y/N however had seen since she was a child how much that kind of role cost those who still maintained those balances. For people who didn't shift, for those who only had a label and had forgotten the past, things were different, they boiled down to a few stereotyped traits, but in packs, in groups like this one, the sacrifices were continuous. And apparently Roman had been doing them since he was a kid and those moments of anger, while avoidable, maybe weren't so unjustified after all.

Mate needs to rest.

She clutched his jacket around her shoulders, arms and back tingling with another shiver and inspired lunge, pushing the memories away as the sky began to grow less gloomy giving new color to the buildings around them. Her she-wolf could think in simple patterns, no human reasoning, but she wasn't entirely wrong in that circumstance. Maybe no one had ever told him, maybe all that pressure had put blinders on him and that was the only way he knew. Her father had taught her to be strong, to behave differently from what nature expected of her, but he had never demanded anything back. He had taught her to demand from herself not to prove something to others.

- Nobody questions it, but no matter how hard you try or how much you give, you'll never be enough for anyone so it's not worth always forcing your hand. I guess that's the kind of advice Paul doesn't give you, loosen up, but he should. Although I think he likes to see you raise your voice. A little less when you make it to him. – she mused, remembering the way he'd almost hid under the table last night.

He'd remained defensive until they'd parted ways, looking the most submissive and condescending Y/N had ever seen and to think he usually breathed pretty much the same air as Roman… he was never more than two inches from his face.

Distracted by her same disturbing observation, she turned to look at him, her omega suddenly yelping at the unabashed attention she found him giving her. She saw a smug smile spread across his lips, showing his impossibly white teeth and Y/N's stomach tingled. Yet another shiver to make her skin itch a little everywhere.

- First you save him and then you give me advice instead of him? You're being good. - he joked and she moved instinctively, trying to shake off the sudden heat that was causing her.

First the chills, now the hot flashes. It wasn't a good sign.

Good. Good.

She tried to silence her wolf's voice, thrilled at the idea of having received recognition from him and sincerely wanted to say that that hadn't been her intention, but she didn't even know what the first intention had been. She was used to staying detached, staying out of potential problems like this, but she hadn't been able to help herself. More time she spent in that place, more time she spent with him, less clear things seemed to her.

- It's just the part of me that tends to feel sorry. Bring out your clichés big guy, this is the time. – she attacked him with a theatrical sigh, not intending to give it to him and Roman joined her, nodding his head in amusement.

- So you want to take care of me? - he inquired and Y/N forced herself to repress whatever she was feeling at the moment.

- Pity, not care. – she specified with a grimace, however managing to keep it just for a second before Roman placed a hand on her head.

Mate. Mate. Safe.

She felt his fingers creep through her hair, almost cover her and something gripped her stomach, pinning her in place as her pulse quickened and her breath seemed unable to leave her lungs. It was a feeling Y/N had never experienced before, something she couldn't fully explain and beyond any kind of physical reaction. It wasn't just her body, it was something that sank into her guts and seemed to strip her of any defenses. She didn't like that feeling, made her anxious, even if a part of her seemed to want the opposite.

- We'll do this, you'll take care of that and I'll take care of the rest. - he murmured close, too close, his breath slamming against her temple and his warmth surrounding Y/N.

Her she-wolf wanted to curl up against him and not come out for the rest of her days. She, Y/N, wanted to, because she was genuinely tired of having to keep up every wall around her. It would have been nice for once not having to force herself, rest, have a crumb of what they had snatched from her future. Roman seemed able to give her everything… and after the first few days, he had improved his manners, but she couldn't let her guard down. She couldn't let him have control, she couldn't give him even what ounce of freedom she had left. He had already taken from her without asking, he could have done it again and she would have gone too far.

She had the impression of being upside down, about to explode, undecided which voice inside her head to let win. She was in the middle of a street, in a city she didn't know with no idea what to do, and it was like nothing that had ever happened to her before. Knowing how to deal with things and relying on herself was her way of surviving, she'd never been off her guard, never in this state. And she was beginning to suspect that this was just the beginning.

She felt Roman force her against him, gently but without giving her room to maneuver and without even noticing she ended up resting her head against his firm chest, his face resting on top of hers. His breathing, the sound of his body, calmed her suddenly, dragging her into a corner of her mind where the rest of the world didn't exist. She rubbed her fingers on the edge of Roman sweatshirt, like she had done the night before, and inhaled his scent. He smelled good, he smelled like-

The sound of the bus leaving pulled Y/N out of her trance and she jerked away, turning to watch as it drove down the road leaving her there.

- Let's go now – Roman's voice rumbled behind her after a few seconds and Y/N nodded, trying to regain the little control left on her.

***

They had spent the rest of the day apart. He and the Wise man had left not long after morning, and Y/N had disappeared upstairs without looking back, the same dejected expression she had two days ago. Roman hadn't wanted to force her, limiting himself to calling Naomi for some news and give Y/N the space she seemed to need, but it was a more difficult resolution than expected.

He had spent his entire life without a mate, yet now that his wolf had finally found her, the idea of going back had become impossible to sustain. Y/N wasn't easy, she wasn't even remotely similar to what Roman could have imagined, everything seemed difficult with her, but those few times he had seen her let her guard down were enough for him to decide.

He stopped in the doorway, hands in his pockets and a serious expression, as she finally turned to look at him. Naomi walked past him with one of her warning noise and a pat on his arm and Roman accepted silently, waiting for her to leave them alone. All day, he had done nothing but think about it: they had taken a few steps forward, he didn't want to go back. It was a risky decision that many wouldn't have liked and honestly, he didn't either, but somehow he owed it to her for her compromises and it was always a family matter. Something his mom had taught him to respect.

- How did it go? – he heard her ask, as he sat down at the kitchen counter.

She had a bowl in her hands in which she was twisting the dough into something, hair tied up in a low bun from which curls popped out. She didn't have the sad look of that morning at dawn, she at least spoke to him, but she still wasn't in the state in which he would have wanted to see her when he returned.

- You can't take that bus. You wouldn't get far anyway. – he said rough and Y/N put the bowl on the counter, giving him a tight smile that would have killed anyone.

- Thank you for reminding me once again that Im one of your properties now.

He felt her sudden repulsion, saw her body stiffen imperceptibly as a sign that she was raising those hateful walls, her gaze pointing at him like the day she woke up there. He watched her hands grip the marble top, knuckles beginning to lose color as his wolf writhed about, sensing her reaction.

- I’ll tell the Wise man to arrange things for your family if necessary. - he informed her, trying to ignore the annoyance to let her know his decision.

And for a long moment Y/N stared at him impassively, as if his words hadn't reached her, but her grip had eased, her shoulders slumped.

- What? – she asked confused after a minute and Roman took a deep breath.

- I said I'd take care of everything and I'm a man of my word. I'll let them cross the border if maintaining a link is so important to you, but you'll stay here. With me.

The lack of information was a serious problem as she had so far refused to talk about her past life, Roman had no idea what to expect or what problems had prompted her to travel alone, however whatever they were, they were mates, this was an important event in anyone's eyes and they would have recognized it too. Problems and implications would have been just snags to fix.

- But it would be against the laws- he heard her muttering, suddenly lost.

There were few real pack in the world and with strict rules. There were balances to respect, boundaries to maintain and when something got out of place, most of the time things fell apart. Crossing a border was a declaration of intent that often led to punishments, attacks, executions. Hardly anyone was allowed, certainly not a mate's home pack. For whoever Y/N was his by now, the fact that he hadn't marked her yet and she wasn't inclined to give in was just a hitch and if any member of her old pack set foot there, it would be seen as an act of war. No one knew about them yet, he hadn't spoken to the Elders yet, but he didn't have many options left if she persisted in having that urge. He wanted to reassure her and he had the power to do everything, he just had to take care that it went well and no idiot would mistake that gesture for a sign of weakness.

- I make the laws here. If they respect the order, they will have my permission.

Still clinging to the counter, Y/N stood silently watching him. She had a confused expression he never expected to see, she looked incredulous and displaced, her eyes planted on his to look for something. Roman didn't know what was going through her mind at that moment, but his wolf was clearly sensing the quickening of her body, her breathing less still than before. He didn't expect that kind of reaction, not after all her stubbornness. Wasn't that what she wanted?

- ... leave Paul alone. No need, no one will come - she refused, shaking her head abruptly.

A couple of curls escaped down her neck, joining the others and Roman looked at her as if she had just sprouted another head, as she turned the bowl, more not to sit still than out of a real desire to do it, ending up giving up anyway when he wrinkled his nose, irritation building quickly.

- I already told you that you can't leave.

- I heard.

- I'm trying to give you what you want. I'm trying everything.

- I know-

- So, what’s the problem? Why won't you accept?! – he snapped, seeing her lower her shoulders.

- I really wish they would come, but it will never happen. Its not something I can change.

Never? Would they never come?! He was even willing to change the rules to prove his intentions, open the doors of his packland, his home, but she was sure that they would never have accepted?! They were mates, they were destined from birth, meetings like the one between them - however little idyllic - were rare events and he, moreover, was not in the position of having to prove anything to anyone. It was he who reached out his hand, he who was now above everything, everyone and they would have refused for what? Pride?

- The territory of the Bloodline is the largest in the last ten years in the whole country. No one has ever reached the level that I have. They would have everything here, they wouldn't miss anything- he almost growled, the alpha that was in him ready to jump out feeling attacked on what he had worked so hard for, but Y/N stopped him before he could even explode completely.

He saw her hands suddenly squeezing again on the counter, her back pressed against the marble and her eyes narrowed briefly in a last attempt to control her feelings.

- Roman I don't have a family. Not anymore. My mother's mate was a rogue… he took her away when I was a child, my pack, my father… they tried to fix things and didn’t end well. No one will come cause there’s no one left, not ‘cause all this is not enough – she said, letting out a heavy breath when the words stopped.

Caught off guard, he frowned and looked at her confused.

He hadn't expected such a thing. He knew she was alone, she'd confirmed it, but she thought there was a different reason behind, a sad event, some bad family history. He had heard her say so many times that she didn't want to stay there, that she wanted to go home, that she wanted her freedom back that Roman had thought of everything except the possibility that she had no one to go to. He was stunned and the whole story seemed surreal to him: was that the reason why she hated the idea of him as her mate so much? And what was she planning to do by going back to a place where she would have no one?

- You said you wanted to go home. You want to go home. - he repeated seriously and Y/N let go a tight, sad smile, huddling her head between her shoulders.

If anyone else had told him such a thing, he would have taken it for a stupid lie and would not ended up well, but he knew for a fact that Y/N wasn't lying. He felt it and didn't like it. All this time she had been alone, with no one, away from him.

- I would really like to go back, but I honestly don't know why anymore. I guess it's because I've wanted nothing else all my life… what do I do if I throw away the only goal I've ever had?

It wasn't a good reason, it wasn't even a decent excuse, but in some strange way Roman understood that. He had never been in the same condition as her, yet the alternatives that had been given to him growing up had never seemed like real alternatives. The plan had always been one and for that plan, that purpose, to have what he had now, he had sacrificed more than necessary. He couldn't allow himself mistakes, he couldn't change his ways, he had to go on as long as he was able to because by now he really didn't know what else to do and for Y/N was the same.

He nodded silently and his mind immediately went elsewhere, instinctively reacting as always in the only way he was used to reacting. Pointing to the problem, her past menace.

- Who was your mother's mat- but for the umpteenth time that afternoon, Y/N stopped him.

He watched her completely erase the space between them and before he could even really understand what she was doing, he felt her hands sink into his beard and neck, lips pressed against him, silencing him.

Mate.

The taste of Y/N erased from his mind anything that wasn't her and in no way being able to help himself he pulled her against him, anchoring her hips to his body to prevent her from running away. It was like completely losing control, like the first time he smelled her from the car. His head throbbed, his bones vibrated, his muscles heavy, he felt hungry, needy and everything he had always learned to keep separate, between the human part of him and the alpha one, suddenly mixed together. Without even realizing it, what she had begun as an ordinary kiss had become something else, his hands holding her possessively, his mouth asking for more and more. He caught her by her hips, lifting her onto the counter with ease and pushed against her, pushing his way between her legs and immediately feeling her pull away. She didn't push him totally away, she didn't growl, but she still managed to make him stop attacking her, teeth biting into his lip.

- You have to… improve your attempts to be nice to me, because they are not so good honestly, but thank you. For at least trying. - she murmured, rubbing her thumb against his dark jawline and moving the hand he'd tried to anchor her with, on her leg.

Her voice seemed to rumble in Roman ears, close and warm against his skin. Her scent everywhere around him, inviting him to hold her again, to have more. It was a reminder that he would no longer be able to do without and that now, while her nails scratched the line of his tattoo was calming him after turning it on in a few moments. He lifted his gaze to her, unwillingly moving it away from the full curve of her lips, her slender neck and the curve of her shoulders where he wanted to mark her.

- You didnt answer – he blew softly, seeing her shake her head.

- It doesn't matter anymore.

- I can take care of him. - he announced seriously, tightening his grip on her possessively.

Y/N strangely didn't get angry, almost seemed not to pay attention to it, limiting herself to giving him a pat on the chest, an almost imperceptible hint of a soft smile on her lips.

- Good to know… Can you put me down now too? Or should we start arguing again big boy?

Tag squad: @sunnyfleur23 @racerchix21 @alyanarossi @wickedsunfire @romanreignsdefencesquad @romanstheory @thiccc-rider-mcintyre @keybladeofsteel @iovereigns @msbigredmachine @nayys-world @gobbersworld @utika151209 @cumxxslutt @civildawn @romanmydaddy @triscillal @papireigns-05 @helensanders92 @ichdrachenfrau @darqchilddaydreamz @meggylynnloves @vintage-pvssy @unfriendly--blvck--hottie @nicolewoo @niknakbucks92 @wrestlezaynia @reignsx @reigns-central-blog @kianaleani @daguenoire @extra-11 @thedonsfactory @snowpanda18 @nestorsgirlfriend @brattyfics @wanna-be-dominated @kitanasposts @tribalchiefreigns @2baddies2furious @vebner37 @raeluvshammett @depressedneedingrevenge @foreverlyjay

#roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns x reader #roman reigns x y/n #roman reigns x oc #roman reigns fan fiction #roman reigns smut #roman reigns x female reader #roman reigns fanfic #roman reigns fic #wwe fanfiction

[the-cult-of-riley]

Sleeping With Ghosts (Act One: Chapter Twenty Six)

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Female OC

[[Masterlist]]

A/N: Eeep! One more chapter after this for Act One.

This one ties things up on Charlotte's end and the next one will tie things up on Simon’s. I’ll warn you, the next chapter is starting the angst/hurt early lmao

August 30th 2014

“I wish you didn’t have to go,” Charlotte murmured as she lay in bed with Simon. They were facing each other, the room lit dimly by the bedside lamp. The clock read 4.35 am and Simon was due to ship off for a mission soon. It had been hard for her to adjust to the SAS missions with the fact she had zero contact with him until he came home but with time, it had slowly gotten easier to deal with. 

“I know, love. At least I got to spend your birthday with you this time,” he replied ruefully, his hand buried in the hair at the nape of her neck and he rubbed it soothingly. It was always hit and miss if he’d be around for her birthday or not but she was used to it now.

“I guess, you’ll be gone for yours though,” she pouted, making him grin as he leaned over, closing the gap as he placed a tender kiss to her lips. 

If she was honest with herself, she figured by now after being together for eight years, he’d have gotten bored of her, that the relationship might have run its course, but it hadn’t. It was still going strong, she still had those same butterflies in her stomach when he kissed her as she had at that damn bus stop. 

His lips trailed down to her jaw and then her neck and a smile curled on her lips as he rolled her to her back with him hovering over her as he lavished her neck with attention.

“I’ve been thinkin’ about somethin’,” he purred against her skin, nipping her and eliciting a gasp in return.

“What's that?” she asked, barely paying attention when he was kissing her neck like that. He settled heavily between her legs, the pair still naked after the night before and she could feel how hard he was. He moved slightly to look at her, those deep brown eyes peering right to her soul.

“Was thinkin’... when I get back we could start tryin’ for a baby,” he confessed and she blinked up at him for a moment as his words pinged around her brain. A baby. He wanted a baby with her. 

She’d had to come off the contraceptive pill a couple of months back due to having some unpleasant side effects so they’d been using condoms the entire time. They’d been super careful at first but she’d admit that the past two weeks had been a little more sloppy. He’d fucked her a fair few times without a rubber, complaining he hated the feel of them and he’d pull out. Two of those times, he hadn't managed to pull out on time. She wasn’t too concerned though, she had a feeling it would take some effort to knock her up and she tried not to let that worry her. She was still thrown for a loop that he wanted a baby with her.

“Are you sure? It's a pretty big decision,” she said carefully, looking up at him. He nuzzled his nose against hers, causing her to smile at his affectionate touch.

“Positive. Been thinkin’ about it ever since I saw you with Jo as a baby,” he confessed and she was even more dumbfounded. They hadn’t really talked about having kids before and if she was honest, she hadn't thought he wanted any. She’d been fine with that but now he was saying he wanted to try for a baby and she felt excitement bloom in her belly. 

“We might need to see a doctor though, with my PCOS it could be hard to get pregnant,” she murmured, raking her hands through his short hair and he shivered. 

“That's fine by me, sweetheart,” his lips collided with hers then but there was an urgency there that hadn't been before. He dominated her mouth, rubbing his straining cock against her in a way that had her moaning. It was crazy how wet he was able to get her with nothing but a kiss and he slid inside of her easily with one swift movement. They both moaned and he gave her no respite as he started pounding into her, one hand propped by her head and the other gripping the flesh on her thigh as he hitched her leg up his hip. 

“Can’t wait to put a baby in you,” he groaned, punctuating his words by a hard thrust that made her see stars. “Pump you full of my cum until it takes, have you all full and round for me,” he drawled, sounding half delirious and Lottie was dumbfounded that her husband seemed to have some form of breeding kink, not that she was complaining. His words made her whine as she arched up at him and he chuckled darkly, the hand on her thigh moving to her neck, squeezing it and making her head rush deliciously. 

“Simon,” his name left her lips in a broken moan and a long drawn out groan got ripped from his throat.

“You like that, love? Like the idea of me knockin’ you up?” he growled but she could do little else but nod as her body was jostled with the force of his thrusts. He was panting and moaning above her, unashamed in his wanton behaviour as he pounded into her. 

“Fuckin’ hell, look at you. So eager for me to fill you up,” he groaned and his voice was hoarse, tense like he was a second away from shattering. He shifted the angle of his hips and she cried out, back bowing as her orgasm crashed over her out of nowhere. Her body twitched under his, pleasure rolling over her in waves as he cursed up a storm before shooting his load inside of her. 

She felt like she was floating as she came down from her high and he rested his head in the crook of her neck as he tried to catch his breath. She ran her hands through his hair lovingly and she felt him smile against her neck, placing a tender kiss there before he moved to look at her. 

“I love you,” he murmured and she couldn't help the smile on her face.

“I love you too,” she replied softly. 

They spent a little more time in bed, wrapped around each other before it was time for him to leave. It never got easier to say goodbye to him but she hoped she could distract herself well enough until it was time for him to come back. He said they hoped to be back by Christmas but they couldn't promise anything.

“You sure you’ve got everything?” she asked him as she stood at the door. He had his duffel with him, fully dressed and ready to go. She was in one of his shirts.

“Yeah, got all I need. Make sure you stay safe, yeah? You know if you need owt, just ring up mum or Tommy,” he insisted, the same speech he always gave her, not that he needed to. When he was deployed she spent a lot of time at Anne’s or with Beth.

“Yes, sir,” she smirked and he raised a brow, giving her a look that told her if he wasn't in a rush to leave, he’d have her bent over his knee. 

He stepped closer, dropping his duffel on the floor next to him as an arm wrapped around her waist, the other hand cupping her jaw as he kissed her senseless. He plundered her mouth thoroughly until her lungs burned and only then did he pull away. 

“Gonna miss you, love,” he murmured, rubbing his nose against hers softly as she melted into him.

“I’ll miss you too. You try to stay safe too please. Need you home in one piece,” she implored, gazing up at him. He nodded, placing a sweet kiss to the tip of her nose before placing one on her lips too. When he moved away, she felt the loss already and tried to ignore it. 

“I’ll try my best, sweetheart. I always do,” he smiled softly at her, a special smile he always saved just for her and it made her chest fill with warmth. She took his hand, nuzzling it before kissing his knuckles and his eyes softened as he looked at her. 

“Get going before you get in trouble,” she shooed him off, not wanting him to leave but not wanting him to be late. He was up for a promotion soon and he’d been working his arse off for it. To say she was proud of him was an understatement. He nodded, looking at her with the same regretful face he always wore on the days they had to part with each other. 

“I’ll see you soon, Lottie,” he smiled softly.

“See you soon. Hopefully sooner rather than later so you can knock me up,” she smirked and his soft smile turned into a devilish grin.

“I’ll hold you to that,” he flashed her an award winning smile, looking like someone who just won the lottery at the thought of having a child with her and she was once again struck with wonder that this man was her husband. 

She waved to him as he left, shutting the door behind her with a heaving sigh. It would be a rough few months but she’d cope, she always did. And now she had something extra to look forward to when he got back. 

Christmas Day 2014

Charlotte had cleaned the house from top to bottom and she was exhausted. She’d had Christmas dinner at around 1 pm at Anne’s house and it had been perfect, as it always was. She then spent a few hours playing with Joseph and his new toys. She loved playing with him, he had such a vivid imagination. She knew he preferred to play with Simon, who always made time for his little nephew, but with him not being here, he was more than happy for her to take his place. 

They’d all hoped Simon would turn up today but she already had a feeling he wouldn't make it dead on Christmas. She was hoping maybe he’d get there the next day, she missed him more than she could vocalise. 

She was already thinking about the plans she needed to make when he got home.

She’d been having trouble with her PCOS again, her periods deciding to vanish or just minor spotting so she was planning to ask Simon to go with her when he got back to see the gynaecologist. She was nervous to go by herself and she also thought it was important for him to understand what was going on with her body if they were going to start trying for a baby. She only ever had regular periods when she was on the pill so she wasn't surprised she was having issues now she had to come off it.

She hadn't really planned on leaving the Riley home so early on Christmas day but she was just so tired and she wanted to get the house ready for if Simon got back. She’d spent the time cleaning and now it was night as she stood in the living room and folded the clean clothes. She wanted him to come back to a nice home and she’d admit to letting chores go by the wayside a little when he wasn't around just because she missed him so much. 

She was grateful that she was working again these days because if she was stuck at home all day every day thinking about how much she missed him, she’d climb the walls. She’d managed to get herself a job at an alternative clothing brand company, designing patterns for the clothes. Some days she’d go into work where she had a little office all to herself and she liked her coworkers. They even had her model for them a few times with the clothes for the website, saying she had the perfect look for them. Simon had been stupidly proud about it, it was cute. 

She’d roped him in one time to model some of the menswear and it was funny looking at him in such goth aesthetic clothing. She’d found it hot but he’d refused to do it again after all her coworkers had fussed all over him. She hadn't blamed them. 

Perks of working there were heavily discounted clothes and she loved all of her wardrobe now, even got some jumpers for Simon. She wasn't sure what it was about her husband and jumpers but she just thought they were insanely attractive on him. 

Her hands stilled when she heard something outside and she eyed the window. She couldn’t see through it where she was because of how dark it was outside so she continued to fold up the pants in her hands before putting them in the pile. Then she moved to the window, peeking around the curtain so she didn't look so nosey as she tried to figure out what the noise was. No one was there and she shook her head perplexed before shrugging to herself. Maybe it was the neighbour's cat, the thing loved to be annoying in their front garden. 

She made her way back to the laundry having no idea that in just a few hours she’d be given the news that her entire family was dead, that she would be handed her husband's tags as they told her he too was in the fire. She had no idea that in just a few hours her whole world would crash down around her. 

#simon riley x oc #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x oc #ghost x oc

[emetogirl]

My cousin plays football and is quarterback at a D3 college. My parents and I drove a few hours to watch him play in his championship game.

During the first quarter he had this amazing throw that resulted in a touchdown, and the crowd went absolutely crazy. It took a few seconds for us to realize that my cousin wasn't celebrating with his team. He was kneeling down where he'd thrown the ball from and he'd taken his helmet off... because he was throwing up. All over the field.

The trainer got him off the field and to the bench while his team kicked the extra point and the defense went out on the field. We thought the coach might pull him from the game, but he didn't. My cousin even threw up again on the sidelines in the third quarter. But he played the entire game and I felt so bad for him because he was very obviously not feeling good and he powered through anyway, only to lose the game in the end to very questionable call.

Since he was sick, my cousin's coach let him ride back with his family after the game instead of making him take the bus back to campus. We had carpooled from my aunt's house so we had to kind of cram into her van. It was a very unpleasant ride back because he needed her to pull over two times to throw up again. He was really sick. None of us caught it though!

This reads like a fanfic! I hope your cousin was okay and it is SO sad he lost his game even though he played while so sick! He deserved a win for that lol

#emeto #emetophilia #irl sick #irlsickstory #vomit tw #emeto tw

[blogofloathing]

Part 1 of 1, Victoria And The Bespectacled Girl

"Got anything on your line?" Gesturing vaguely in Walter's direction with her back turned to him.

He paused, as if maybe Victoria had summoned a fish with her query, but the rod stayed slack.

"m'nope, maybe they're gone fishin'" he coughed, letting out a joke so dad she didn't even bother with a lighthearted sigh in admonishment.

And in any case her lungs were busy working, as she dug through another large hill of refuse,

Bottles and wrappers, shopping carts, broken glass and jagged metal, but still no food.

These dubious materials clinging to each other with whatever weird algae grew in these parts.

For a moment she thought she felt something, but one again it was snatched back by whatever spirit had brought it out to her in the first place.

And finally she wrenched herself free of the garbage heap, sat dam to the river, her only findings were a new set of scrapes along her arms.

An unpleasant risk when scavenging, though she found the scratching to be oddly satisfying

"Walt I'm tellin' ya these fish ain't bite these days!"

Her companion giving a strained sort of chuckle, something between tobacco and weed.

It was a wonder you couldn't see clouds billow out when he spoke, to obscure his patchy stubble.

"Mm, maybe we need to pick a new spot.." the words themselves glancing around the little hovel,

Recollecting her favorite graffiti or nastiest gash.

She paced around idly, shoes providing less than comfort with soles long since worn out.

This had been their spot, finding a pile of trash comfortable enough to sleep on took time!

But she couldn't deny that if the fish had run dry, and not due to being cooked, something would have to change soon,

"I'm cool with whatever though" Walter added, a disclaimer just incase his plan didn't work out.

Victoria stood thinking for some time, it's not like she had much to move,

She could count her possessions on one hand, half of which accounted for the clothes on her back.

The rest summing up to Walter's various bags of supposed bait—and though she questioned the quality of his selection—it had worked until now.

She allowed those fish one last rain check before Bus Victoria would depart.. and..

"Urgg okay! Let's go!" Her exclamation a symbolic and literal stomping of her foot.

Walter's face maintained a neutral, calm smile, as she began marching around.

"m'all I've got's my fisher pole, so just let me know" Walter mumbled, taking a debatably deserved rest.

Back flat against the bridges support beam, it was so old she wondered if he would collapse it.

The whole setting was a minefield of rusty metal and discarded items tossed over the railing.

Which lended well to the hobo lifestyle, someone's always too full to finish their food, and equally too lazy to seek out a trashcan.

And when that didn't work, Walter knew his way around the fishing pole.

This is how the pair had subsisted until new government regulations swooped in to sever this lifeline, making it illegal to actually fish in the river.

Signs were pegged all around warning passersby that to catch anything here was punishable by law

Including those same signs, sitting in piles nearby. Transformed into yet another nameless trash pile.

She set her hands together and closed her eyes,

"Please let there be food soon" both to herself and any god watching, a quiet prayer, just incase

Maybe some divine inspiration would come down and show her how to fix her life somehow,

Victoria had let herself become comfortable here, stupidly, of course this was unsustainable.

She just didn't think it would have to end so soon, despite all evidence, she had remained optimistic.

What if their next spot was flat too, or one of them got sick? Either would be a death sentence

These worries and tragedies-to-come swirled in her head, a violent rapid of her own making.

Rendering her mute in this airless terrarium.

She wordlessly "packed" her things, sure that Walter had said something—probably another stupid joke—but even the river din was inaudible

It felt like her life had all been building up to one big explosion, with her at its centerpoint,

An auto pilot careening herself right towards the nearest mountain, "god this sucks"

Said to no one in particular, but all the same Walter wilted back "amen to that sister"

The two of them giving a limply disconnected fist bump, an unspoken friendship with the air.

Though even if they had touched, Victoria knew she was far too insulated to enjoy his warmth.

She wandered around the small bit of land they called home, trying to take everything in

To grab every piece of herself she'd strewn about in her short time here, it was all so scattered

Like every night here had taken another minuscule of herself and plastered it onto the concrete,

Victoria almost wanted to resent this place, for coddling her, allowing her a short rest.

Like the bridge itself had deceived her, but all the same she knew it was her fault in the end.

Once again standing still in the eye of her storm, surely she was used to this by now right?

She hadn't even noticed her pace halt, as if these lingering thoughts had slowed her to a stop

The careful drag of the wind against her hulking fears and great unknowable anxieties.

Maybe this was how it was supposed to be, she'd been homeless almost as long as she'd been.

Maybe it was just the way the world worked, the losers lose, and the people up top throw their trash down on them. Out of sight out of mind.

This contemplation carried her right back into pacing, a dead man's trot, rendering her oblivious to anything around her but the weight in her heart.

Oblivious enough apparently, that she didn't see the large tread-wheeled machine in her way.

Despite its whirring and raggling, she only took notice of it when her feet had met its path.

But rather than courteously stepping to the side, it continued on, pulling dust and sand up in the air.

And out of her; an embarrassing cry of surprise, as she stumbled head over heels onto the ground.

Landing unceremoniously in a heap, adding a new scar to her already bled through knees.

She found herself staring at a pair of greasy boots, evidently belonging to the owner of the device.

"Youch! Hey watch where you're goin with that thing eh?" She clattered, rubbing her head.

As she sat up and muttered unheard profanities, sitting crossly criss cross, sans apple sauce.

"Me watch where I'm going? You almost ruined my school project being so careless!" The palid toned girl spat back, this was gonna be fun.

A sly grin gravitated onto Victorias face, "oh ho you one of them S.I.T smarty pants' huh?"

She sneered down her nose at her, despite being generally shorter on even footing.

"Yes infact I am one of 'them S.I.T smarty pants" she spoke venomously, mocking Victorias accent

"Are ya now? Well I just could never tell by ya four eyes and little gizmo here" pointedly eyeing both.

Her dark hair seemed to frizz up at the remark as if itself had felt offended on her behalf,

With a quickly reddening face and equally faltering temper she grumbled "well at least I'm educated"

"And you know I ain't? Psh, figures for an upper crust like yourself" the retort acting like a push to the chest, an overzealous verbal challenge.

Both now standing straight, Victoria looked down

"Do you even know who I am? I-" this remark pushed aside by Victorias "ohh you're one of those types huh? Well sorry missy I haven't heard of you"

Seems lucky I haven't, thought Victoria, of course some preppy trust fund kid is who she'd run into on her proverbial eviction day, "and I don't want to"

The still yet to be named girl seemed fit to burst with unpleasantries, "I'm Simone Chekhov! of the S.I.T Robotechtronics department!"

This smattering of accolades fell from her like it had been sitting right on the edge from the start.

"I've received several letters from several colleges even more prestigious but I've refused all of them because I take this field very seriously and S.I.T is the only college with a proper robotechtronics department that allows me to do what I need to do because I'm already higher level than my teachers and I'm involved in every single robotics club and related groups studying how to-"

She continued for quite a bit, Victoria had mentally tuned her out around halfway through,

A manic fire had lit in her eyes, as if she hadn't just been trying to one up this dirty hobo

At parts her expression fittingly incredulous, a fury at being questioned on her credentials,

But equally adopting a strange sort of excitement, Victoria sensed she didn't get to say all this often.

"And that's not even the half of it!" She finished, panting like her monologue had run a marathon

Victoria was partially stunned at the conclusion, just who was this girl? She wondered, even after hearing what was effectively her life story.

She glanced back at Walter for support, but all he provided was a shallow sort of thumbs up.

"I didn't understand a word of that, but congrats to ya, I'm sure your science friends love it"

A dismissive little remark, that seemed to thunk on impact with Simone, like hitting a wall

"Yeah, they do" short and snappy, a little too quick of a response, something in it trembled

"I'm sure they do.. Simmy?" Victoria said, though she remembered her name quite clearly.

"It's, Simone, thank you" something had shifted in her tone, while it hadn't been haughty before..

It was certainly more subdued, "struck a nerve eh? Figure your dorm feelin empty?" She slithered

"That's none of your bui-" a scarlet sheen leaking back into her face, gosh was she a cute one.

Victoria eyed her up and down, her hair black and glossy, strung up in two pigtails.

Giving off the effect of a disappointed rabbit with the pair tucked behind her ears.

With an oversized pair of nerd goggles sat atop like a pair of rings for a wedding.

"Look you're a real sweetheart I'm sure but me an' my pal over there-" pointing backwards to Walter in the complete wrong direction.

"Need to go find our next fishin spot-" but before Victoria could finish her exit,

Simone cut her off with a pippy sort of ahem, "you do know fishing in the lake is-"

"Illegal yeah and unless you have a machine that grows fish, you can shove it"

Simone looked a bit shocked at the expression on her face, but hit back with.

"Well if you knew anything about robotechtronics you'd know that's not how it works!"

"Well I don't need to know a thing about it because it's not a field worth pursuing!"

The two let out a growl of frustration, moving closer, their words circling each other like lions.

"At least I'm not living under a bridge!"

"Well la dee da misses richy rich here!"

"I'll have you know I worked hard to get into this college! Something you clearly wouldn't get!"

"Oh it's real easy to get, you put together a few nuts and bolts and now you're a fuckin genius!"

Simone had an almost hilarious expression of indignation, as if she wouldn't be able to stand this stupid girl a second longer.

Victoria snarled each biting remark like a beast at the bedside of a dying animal, eager to hunt for this entertainingly easy prey.

With each advance of their argument the deep maroon shuttering their faces flooded in.

The pairs fists clenched as if to strike, but using only their words, flames licking at their skin

"ugh!! You are impossible! I don't even know why I'm still standing here arguing with you!"

She shouted, the angry expletive echoing around the cavernous space where they stood.

"Then why are you still standing here dumbass! We need to find a new place before it gets-"

A well of emotions that had been prime to rupture the entire time finally exploded inside her,

Even her freckled ears turned a dark shade of red, staining every part of her pale skin.

"Do you wanna sleep in my dorm?!" Less of a question, and more so a screamed exclamation.

Suddenly the mood had seemed to shift, but not in too drastically different a manner.

This was the last thing Victoria would've expected, it caught her so off guard she nearly fell again

"W-What? You want me to-" but the shorter girl had already started dragging her alongside.

"Let's just go! You look like shit anyway, and smell as much too!" Though this seemed unrelated.

"Well why don't we go then? We don't need you stinking up the place anymore" Victoria hissed.

"You're the one with stink lines coming off you!" Following up with "not to mention that hair"

Practically spitting in the bespectacled girls face, "fuckin nerd I can't believe I'm gonna go see your stupid ivory tower" rolling her eyes exaggeratedly.

"It's not like you're moving in, idiot!" She blistered hotly, "I'm bending the rules enough bringing a girl like you into this school.." Simone grumbled further

"Well thank you soooo much I'm sure it'll be very hard for you" Victoria drawled sarcastically

"Yeah it will be actually thank you very much!" A delightful fury painting her round face.

The two bickered all the way to her campus, their faces a moment apart at every step.

Their loud shouting battle soon replaced once more with the sound of the rushing river,

While Walter contentedly watched them walk off, good for Victoria, he thought, mildly amused.

He reached for another wriggling fuzzy worm, and skewered it expertly onto the aged old rusty hook.

And with a hefty swing.. he slung the line back out.

Part 1 of 1 END! What A Delightful Start To A Surely Long Lasting Friendship, Walter Was There Too!

#original character #original writing #shadows over loathing #west of loathing #wol #writing #oc character #writers on tumblr #creative writing #sol #shadows over loathing oc #sol oc #short story #story #writer things #writerscommunity #writeblr #female writers #writer #writers and poets #writblr

[badbreadpuns]

Soft Wings (2/4)

Characters: m!moth x f!reader Content: a charming bookstore, tsundere moth boy, protective monster boyfriend Rating: Lemon (first 3 parts sfw) Word count: ~1,100 words Content warning: intrusive thoughts (this story is about the reader recovering but this could still be upsetting.)

Wednesdays are the highlight of your week now.

Each appointment, Ms. Maxwell sends you to Saturn’s room so you can spend time with him. The two of you have fun together, reading, drawing, playing board games. It’s nice to have something to look forward to.

This Wednesday is no different. Stepping into the room, you’re greeted by a beaming Saturn.

“Welcome back.”

You sit in your favorite chair, a soft smile forming.

“What would you like to do today?”

“I wanted to read, but noticed on the bus ride that I forgot my book…”

“That’s no good.” He holds his chin as he ponders. “My family owns a bookstore, I can take you there.”

“I love that idea.”

Saturn takes you to Ms. Maxwell’s office. She turns to you as the door shuts.

“You’re back early. Is everything alright?”

“Yes, Ms. Maxwell.”

“I want to take her downtown. May I?”

She’s silent for a moment, but her smile lets you know it’s okay. “Sounds fine to me. Don’t get lost.”

Saturn chuckles. “We won’t, don’t worry.”

Stepping outside the building, the cold greets you like a slap to the face.

“Brr.”

“Are you cold?” He holds out a lower arm and lifts his wing. “Here.”

Your cheeks heat up, and not because of the chill. “Thanks.”

An arm wraps around your shoulder, drawing you close—the fuzz warms you instantly. His wing covers your back like a cape.

“Does that feel better?”

You nod, your eyes darting away from his. You’re not used to being so… Close to someone.

His chuckle is soft and playful. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

You appreciate the quiet stroll to the bookstore under Saturn’s wing. Downtown soon comes into view. Water soars into the air and cascades into the waiting fountain. Trees circle the street, their leafless branches covered in lights.

“Have you been downtown at night?”

Shaking your head, you give him a “no.” You don’t leave your house after dark if you can help it.

“The trees are pretty when they’re lit up.” His smile is enough to keep you warm. “Maybe we could see them together some time.”

That sounds nice.

Saturn passes by the buildings, stopping in front of one.

“We’re here.”

Between a nail salon and an electronics store is Black Cat Books. A cat-shaped sign hangs from its side, dangling in the winter breeze. Below it is a large window, displaying several books both new and old. Printed on the window in a serif font is the name, and underneath are the words “Want new books? Check meowt.” The pun makes you chuckle.

“I’ve wanted to visit here.”

A bell rings as you open the door and step inside. The scent of old paper almost overwhelms you, but it isn’t unpleasant. Near the back of the shop is a figure moving around and placing books on the shelves. A lavender moth, much smaller than Saturn, stands behind the counter, his back towards you.

“Greetings, welcome to-” The bug boy turns, his face souring once he sees his customers. “Oh. It’s you.”

“Nova, that’s no way to treat a guest!” He gestures towards you. “Save the sibling rivalry for later.”

Nova squints, his frown dissolving as he registers your presence. “Didn’t see her. Welcome to the store.”

Saturn bends his knees, whispering into your ear. “He forgot his glasses again.”

Nova rolls his eyes, pitch black like his brother’s. “My eyesight isn’t _that _bad.”

“At least your hearing is good!” Saturn gives you a wink and a grin. “Don’t be afraid to look around. While you do that, I’ll head to my room real quick.”

Saturn goes through a door on the back wall, leaving you with his brother. Nova’s expression softens, though a small frown lingers.

“He’s only cocky because of his size.” He sits his elbow on the counter, resting his chin on an open palm. With an annoyed puff he blows his antennae away from his eyes. “Males of our kind are usually smaller… Like me.”

Sounds like a sore spot. Maybe you should change the subject. “I love the store. It’s so cozy.”

A hint of a smile crosses his face. “Thanks.” He turns back to what he was doing before. “Let me know if you need help finding anything.”

You’re drowning in a sea of books, unsure where to start looking. This isn’t even the only room; on the eastern wall is a doorway leading to more shelves. Colorful covers and intriguing titles compete for your attention.

Signs hanging above the shelves, each with a black paw print and cutesy font, point out the home of the genres. Fantasy and sci-fi books lurk in the next room, so you start your search there. By the time Saturn returns, you hold a space adventure starring a centaur.

“Did you find something good?”

“I’ve read stories by this author before. Her romances are always cute.”

You place the book on the counter. Nova rings it up, placing your purchase in a bag.

“Have a good day.”

“It was nice to meet you, Nova.”

Nova almost smiles. Or is less grumpy than earlier, at least. He waves you off as you and Saturn leave.

As the door closes behind you, you huddle into Saturn’s fuzz to fight off the cold. He chuckles, wrapping a lower arm around your shoulder.

“Sorry I left you. I went to feed my cat.”

“It’s okay, I had fun.”

“Nova’s nice under all that grump. He’s shy, like you.”

During your trek back to the office you reach an intersection. Cars zoom by as you wait for the light to turn red.

Step into the street.

Grasping at Saturn’s side, you hide your face in his fuzz.

“Is something wrong?” You can’t see his expression, but there’s worry in his voice.

“It’s… Okay.” The fluff muffles your voice. “I’m okay.”

“Ms. Maxwell told me about your intrusive thoughts.”

Words fail to leave your throat.

“You won’t act on them. You’re safe.”

Wet fuzz brushes against your cheeks. Saturn’s hand rubs your back as you cry into his side, his wings flapping softly against you.

“Take a deep breath.”

You breathe in. As you breathe out, your worry slowly flows out through your nostrils. The tears wind down as you calm yourself.

“That’s it. Do you feel better?”

You look up at him, answering with a quiet nod.

“Good.” His concern melts away, replaced by a warm smile. “Let’s go back to the office.”

Saturn holds you close as you head back, guarding you from the road.

#exophilia #moth boyfriend #monster boyfriend #monster husband #monster lover #monster x reader #lemon #azure writes #f!reader #m!monster #c: nova #c: saturn #s: soft wings

[xitty]

Thank you HappyEle and Akira, the fine event made me feel so many things. I'm looking forward to be able to read it thoroughly and think about it more. But for now:

I loved that Tori was even more adamant about the other fine members not to treat him like he's a fragile being who can't hear unpleasant things because it makes him feel like they leave him out. This isn't the first time (look at Primavera for example), but he was really upset this time. But it fueled him to show them. And I loved how he said to Wataru that he wants to be like them because loves them (fine). They've come so far from Flower Fes. <3

And Wataru, oh Wataru. I feel really sad that people turned their backs on him even on theater course. He really was alone and drifting before the War. And then, his thoughts on negative emotions... It's okay to focus on positive things but man, he's bottling them up too much. Stop with the toxic positivity! Let yourself feel them, Wataru. He also wanted to be help Tori grow and even though he ended up adding to Tori's hardship in a way he didn't mean to, it was fine in the end. And it made him face some of those negative emotions but Tori told him he'll be there to listen. Yes, Wataru, Tori and the rest of fine will support you too! I will probably have more thoughts when I read the whole thing. But just... waaah, there were quite many sad things. Wataru, I hope you'll be okay, trust your friends. <3

I also was thinking how this is a second recent event where people tell someone to be NOT like Eichi. Natsume in Altered and Tori in this story. And yeah, it's a solid advice, we don't need Natsume to repeat War or Tori being as willing to throw people under bus for the sake of efficiency (and it's good for him to realize Eichi is also just a flawed human like all of them). But how Eichi said again that he dislikes himself... that made me sad. How everyone, himself included, often focus on his mistakes etc. I know it's hard, but try to love yourself a little more, Eichi. <3

Yuzuru... He had very much a supporting role here but I hope he'll soon get a really good story. They hinted about his family a few times, maybe a story relating to that? He also provided Yuzuru funnies with being a little murderous, haha. Yuzuru is the steady presence they need. Give Yuzuru more love. <3

And all the little fun and sweet things, Wataru eating with Yuzuru and Tori, Eichi writing messages and emails like an old man, Yuzuru eating seafood flavoured ice cream, Eichi assuring Wataru there's nothing besides friendship between him and Amano, Tori and Shinobu talk... and probably more that were not mentioned yet. The first part sure made me, and many others, nervous but part two gave context and wonderful things, even if some of them were sad. Sometimes life is sad. But they have each other, they tell that to each other again and again, so guys, please remember that.

#i made myself cry several times writing this #still crying tbh #i love them so much #ensemble stars #fine #eichi tenshouin #wataru hibiki #tori himemiya #yuzuru fushimi

[unsleepingtales]

Burrow's End Episode 2 Reactions!

Ok so I watched this spread out over last night and this morning and now I'm in a Great mood for class! This episode was so good though. Really really truly this is wonderful and I love this season.

She thought they would have greater numbers?? Aabria you’re the one who wrote it what do you mean

Erika’s character look is so cool

Electricity?

That is what mothers are like yeah.

I don’t know about every stoat in the world being able to harness lightning magic but sure okay

This line of thinking from Tula feels very in line with what Brennan’s talked about in the past of it always being valuable for someone to have basic needs in mind, and it making everything easier and more enjoyable when those things are considered first.

Oooh paladin things!

This season is going to fuck me up incredibly badly and it’s not even going to be the sad shit it’s just going to be the parent/child interactions.

It hurts to be awake because it’s all I ever think about and there are no answers. So real.

Ava is so good to watch

Every time it cuts to Erika-

Ugh I love dnd so much

Every time Brennan gets a nat1 he kind of hides behind it lol

Tula has a -1 to arcana???

Love to see the weird british things counter return

Cageyyyy

Bear nearby and bear has small friends?

BATTLE MAP BATTLE MAP

THE WHOLE MAP IS A BEAR

Vampire chipmunk??? What the fuck what the fuck what the fuckkkk

WHAT

Ok oh my gif the threatening energy in “Oh, you didn’t beat me.”

WHAT THE FUCK OH MY GOD WHAT I HATE THAT WHAT

I hate it I hate it I hate it no god please no

ON THE DOME TOO??

Izzy is so right about the magic school bus thing

My soul shoots straight out of my ass, into hell. 🙂.

This is so unpleasant to look at

This does not feel proportional but it’s fine this is fine

HOW IS THIS BEAR ALIVE

Erika is so good at being The Old Lady

Be better!!

So help me I will turn this bear around!

Oh my god

I get that the heart beating is important to convey that the bear is still alive but jesus

There’s literally enough bear already.

Parasitic chipmunks nesting inside a bear. Good lord.

God I keep looking at the projection. That’s so unsettling.

Bad! This feels bad!

Oh my GOD

What oh god please no

What a brilliant episode to be watching while I have breakfast

I’m so curious if the bear’s actions are legendary actions or lair actions

Oh that was such a new york mother voice

That was literally a commercial break. The Iyengar-Mulligan bit. That was a comic relief commercial break

Horrible!!!

Eraser destroying power couple lmao

Like a stoat!

As an experienced babysitter I can confirm. Eight year olds are strong and it is because they don’t know they are. Being punched by an eight year old fucking hurts.

They’re taking the Alvin thing so far and it’s incredible

Ava WHAT are you doing

Oh I had a physical reaction to that. That was so unpleasant.

You think you’ve got this (threatening)

(Aabria laughs at the nerve of this play)

I love seeing my own table dynamics reflected in others. Because this wild swinging from hysterical laughter to jaw dropping horror is exactly what happened literally four days ago in my current game.

If your spine isn’t working store bought is fine

I dislike this strongly

She’s in the medulla oblongata! (Mentopolis)

FUCK YEAH LILA

Oh my god Aabria

Terrifying right now but like I’m a fun way

Just a lil blood soaked guy

I really appreciate how Aabria always mentions who’s up next so they can prep

I love doing things that potentially have great consequences just to see what it would do.

Oh we’re in blue again ok

What a wild thing to be happening right now

Oh good god

Do NOT eat it

What oh god what the fuck are you doing

MID COMBAT LEVEL UP???

Oh ok.

No I don’t believe that they’re dead- well, they don’t look great…

Pick your one favorite organ

The devil inside my child’s head!

Level up eyyy

What a visual

And also to you :)

Oh my god

Ok! What a time. Wow.

#burrow’s end #reactions #verbal component #burrow's end

[isbergillustration]

Usually, the blessing of the angels was not a massive problem. The eyes looked like tattoos; fresh ones, black and crisp despite some having been on their skin for over a decade. They covered their chest, back, arms and had lately begun creeping up their neck. Ash did appreciate the eyes not venturing towards their lower body. Not that there was any part of them, physical or mental, that the angels did not know every millimeter of, but one liked to think oneself unobserved around ones private parts. Although they supposed the eyes would spread, eventually. They had only gotten more numerous over the years. At last count, a few months ago, there were 97, but they had spotted a new one since.

The first eye appeared when they were young. They didn’t remember the exact year, but it was not very long after their mother died. Which was why, presumably, mum had assumed it was a tattoo when they spotted it, and gotten so terribly upset. Not mad, not exactly. She kept saying she was grieving too, they wer both grieving, lashing out was an understandable reaction, but getting a tattoo? Those were permanent. Ash had been quite confused, as they hadn’t noticed it yet. Otherwise, they would have known to hide it, but it was on their shoulder blade.

They eyes didn’t hurt, burn they did sort of burn when the angels looked through them. A gentle burn, like a toe dipped into a too hot bath. Mildly unpleasant but not painful. Ash did appreciate that they knew when the eyes were being used, though. That they were not always open, as it were. They were always open visually, though. They did not, to Ash’s knowledge, blink or move their empty pupils about, which they had always thought was quite a shame. Would have been cool to have moving tattoos, although difficult to explain away until more impressive tattoo technology was invented.

Ash did have to hide their not-tattoos, though, to some extent, but it was easy enough. Long sleeves and high collars and some heavy duty make up for the ones across the backs of their hands. The office they currently worked at did not enjoy tattoos, but it was the place the angels had given them. Their orders were diffuse, and difficult to interpret and even more difficult to understand, but this office was involved in some cyber security situation and apparently even the very low level data entry type job they did was useful. Somehow. Despite the fact they had to dress like a drone and drink terrible office coffee and pretend to give a shit about their co-workers. Think about it like being a spy, they told themselves, a cool spy, like in the movies. It was very hard to feel like a cool spy in that office. Which was why they always changed back to normal human clothes on their way home, wiping off the concealer on their hands.

It was on their way home that they spotted it. A creature. Not an angel, though they knew those hovered above the city sometimes, keeping watch from afar, but some… thing. A dark shape, with a familiar large glowing eye, but- but the silhouette was wrong. Off. It had arms and legs, for one thing, quite clearly. They spotted the thing on a rooftop as they waited for their bus, and immediately abandoned their plans. This was something to be investigated. If they were not the angels’ only operative then they deserved to know, right? Even if this guy definitely fell more into the category of creature than person, if such distinctions even meant much any more.

They cut through alleyways and ran past traffic without much care for their own continued safety. This creature- they had to know. They had to find it.

It was getting dark outside, and a dark shape far away was hard to find, and eventually they were left panting and unpleasantly sweaty, leaning against a streetlight and squinting at the buildings above. Nothing. Not even the familiar glow of an angel hovering anywhere nearby. They were close to giving up when they spotted something, a glowing shape, in an alleyway across the street.

They jogged over the street, just barely avoiding getting hit by a bus, and into the alley. Was this maybe a tiny bit reckless? Almost certainly, but the angels would keep them safe. They always did. Even from what looked to be one of their own. Ash trusted them with their life, and many more important things.

The alley was dark, and they couldn’t see the shape, until they heard a noise from behind a dumpster.

«Hello?» they called, «are you-»

Are you what? A friend? A half angel of some sort? A colleague?

Hesitantly they crept closer, flicking on the flash light on their phone, and then, as they came around the dumpster, dropped it in shock. Also because they were aggressively shoved back against the wall, a clawed hand round their neck.

They stared up in a massive glowing white eye, like those of the angels, but there was no halo. However, where the angels were all nebulous dark shapes with many pale hands, this was indisputably a physical creature, with broad shoulders and powerful arms. There were openings in its lower arms, allowing light through, and matching ones on its calves. The arms ended in two thick clawed fingers and a thumb, the feet in two long clawed toes. Its skin, if it was indeed skin, was a dark grey, an odd texture.

Ash gasped for air, clawing at the hand that held them. After a moment, it loosened, enough for them to get some air, for their feet to feel more stable on the ground. Not enough to get away, though.

«Are you- the angels- you’re with them?»

Ash pulled up the sleeves of her jacket to show their eyes.

«Me too, look! Not an enemy.»

They felt a single eye on their throat gently burn, someone looking through, keeping an eye on them. Literally. The grip on their neck loosened a tiny bit more, and the figure seemed to slump. What were they? Not human, but not an angel either. Something made by the angels?

«Who are you?»

Their voice was a choked whisper, and despite noise from the street it sounded too loud to their own ears. The creature remained still for a moment, then made a movement with their free hand as if to remove a hood, and the large eye against the vague black shape disappeared. In its stead was a head, covered in the same dark grey skin. A single glowing eye shone, larger than a normal one, in the centre of their forehead. Below, barely visible in the dark, were two regular eyes. Or had been, anyway. The eyelids had been sown shut with pale thread. There was a flattened nose, and below it a thin slit of a mouth, too wide, and partly open to reveal rows of tiny sharp teeth. Horrifying and fascinating in equal parts.

«Did you- do you, I mean, work for the angels?»

The thing hesitated, then an almost imperceptible shake of its head. It used its free hand to cover the open eye on Ash’s throat.

«You don’t want them to see? You- you used to work for them?»

A nod.

«They made you like this?»

Another nod.

Shit. Was that Ash’s future? Twisted into a thing like this?

«You used to be human?»

It nodded again, and now released Ash’s neck entirely, though the hand covering the eye remained. It did not want the angels to see. Was it on the run? How could you possibly run from creatures that saw everything? Did the angels want to hurt it? Did the angels want to hurt Ash?

«How long?»

It shook its head, pulling the veil of darkness over itself again, and pushed Ash to the ground. In the seconds it took them to reorient themselves again, it was gone. They felt all the eyes buring, now. A flare of unpleasant heat across their upper body. Now, it almost hurt.

#my art #my writing #sketchbook #ink #colour pencil #watercolour #horror art #body horror #eldritch angel #ish #there is lore #which will eventually be my masters thesis if i survive july

[mikimeiko]

Day 4 - Rijeka

And... It's raining. Much more than yesterday, though luckily it's still coming and going.

After a walk in the old town I decide to take the advice from lovely Tumblr user @notasgoodasseven to go see Trsat castle. Rijeka has a day ticket for the buses! Very good, since taking buses is one of my favourite activities XD especially when it's raining XD

The bus climbs up a hill going through a very interesting part of town, where small houses and big high rises are meshed together in a surprising but not unpleasant mix.

On the last stretch of the road to Trsat you get a beautiful view of the entire old town and the harbour; if the rain stops for a bit I might go downhill by foot to get a better view.

The castle is small and quite pretty, they turned most of the court into a giant openair bar? It must be lovely when it's open in good weather.

I don't even have to go find a good viewpoint later because you can see everything from here!

I might come back when it's dark to see it with all the Christmas lights on.

I get a spinach burek from a bakery and head to the bus stop to go to the computer museum... But I discover the computer museum it's only open on Saturdays during winter :( apparently I could have ask them via the website to open it anyway, but a) it's too late and b) it would have put too much pressure on my visit!

While I'm on the bus going back down I see the sun peeking out of the clouds, illuminating a strip of sea in the most beautiful manner. It stopped raining so I decide to get down the bus once I get to the city centre and walk, but of course the moment I get down... It starts raining again 😅

(every time it stopped raining I took a picture XD)

The good news is that the bus day ticket I bought this morning actually covers a much bigger area that I thought, so I decide to just get on a suburban bus that follows the coast down south and just hope for some brief moments of sunlight (in any case, it's better than getting soaked while walking in the streets, not able to see anything because of my umbrella XD)

It's almost ridiculous the amount of joy just being on a bus with the outside the window gives me.

Due to some miscalculation and forgetfulness, I end up waiting almost an hour for a bus in the middle of nowhere (well, there was a cafè/bar, but it was one of those places basically just full of men where everyone looks at you - not a man, not from around here - like an exotic curiosity and with a hint of hostility, so I just had coffee, used the toilet and left). But while I was waiting for my bus the light changed: though it was still pretty cloudy there was a lot more visibility and it was in general much more pleasant, and I actually got to see the island of Krk from a distance!

(I walked on the road to get this picture, I thought I was going to die XD)

Going back to Rijeka the weather kept getting greyer and foggier and wetter, and I wished I could have kept going south but... not this time!

After a brief stop at the hotel to get the things I forgot I decided to take another suburban bus, this time going north. Sadly by the time I actually got on the bus it was starting to get dark, so I didn't see as much from the bus (but it was still lovely). I went to Opatija and from what I could see from the bus it looked really lovely, though when I got off the bus it started raining again, so I just waited for the bus back (how many minutes, how many HOURS I spent waiting for buses today? Probably too many XD but it was worth it).

I went back to Trsat castle after dark and it was indeed very pretty with all the Christmas lights on and the stalls and bar open (though it was still mostly empty, I guess I went too early).

At least four people today have tried speaking to me in Croatian at bus stops etc good job Maddalena for never looking like a tourist I guess XD (this tends to happen to me everywhere I go, people just assume I'm a local XD)

Tonight is my last night and I couldn't leave the Balkans without eating The Grilled Meat, so I found a nice place and... ate the grilled meat XD

Anyway that sauce on the spoon? It's called ajvar, it's made from peppers, eggplant and garlic and it's SO GOOD. I actually bought a jar to bring home XD

#travel #rijeka #croatia #hrvatska #winter break 2022 #mag travels from time to time #i just want a tag for the things i personally put out into the world