#the universe said HAPPY PRIDE MONTH

[disillusioneddanny]

If It Makes You Happy (then why the hell are you so sad?)

Tim took a bite of his ravioli and looked around the table at his family. It was Sunday dinner. A monthly tradition where every member of the family adopted or otherwise came to spend a few hours together. It didn’t matter who was arguing with whom, or how estranged from the family you were at the time. You still had to attend the monthly family dinner. However, there were times when Tim wondered if anyone would notice if he stopped attending. If he no longer came to the dinners where he sat mostly unnoticed by the rest of his family. Where he typically sat in silence, having not uttered a single word throughout the entire event. Would they ever realize he was gone? Did they even realize he was there in the first place? 

A part of Tim truly doubted it, if he was being completely honest with himself. Maybe that was why he hadn’t been able to share with the family his upcoming exhibit. 

Tim was in his fourth year of college. Where he was getting a degree in Art, Technology, and Culture. It was a major that allowed Tim to immerse himself in photography, video art, creative coding, and so much more. He had gotten to work in traditional analog and digital photography. Played around with film and art in ways he had never thought of before while also learning about cultural theory, the expression of ideas, and cultural practices which gave him the chance to truly discover himself. It was the first time he had ever chosen something for himself. 

His entire life he had been groomed to run a business. To at first take over Drake Industries one day and then later Wayne Enterprises where he was unfortunately CEO. But then he had learned about the ATC program at Gotham University and he had fallen in love with it.  He had always been obsessed with photography and even film later on as he grew older and spent his days alone in dusty old Drake Manor. And he had always loved to learn about cultures, he ate up the stories from his parents and their trips abroad. Had spent countless nights watching the people of Gotham and how they did things, and had absorbed it all like a sponge to make up for the fact that he was just a lonely boy living in a manor by himself. 

Even when he had joined the Bats and had made his tiny little place with them, he still fell back on his love for learning about others and his desire to tell their stories. It had just become an intrinsic part of Timothy Drake. 

And now here he was, slowly creeping to the finish line. He had his senior showcase coming up. A requirement for all students who were receiving a bachelor of fine arts. He was to show off all of his best work from the last four years. It was a chance for him to show everything he had learned, and to display his work with pride. 

He had toyed with the idea of inviting everyone to it. To let them see the love that Tim had cultivated over the last four years. He was set to graduate in just a few months and the pride he felt for himself was tremendous. And if Tim invited the Wayne family to his senior showcase, then maybe they could come to his college graduation and share the achievement with them then too. 

It was a big time in Tim’s life and he wanted to share it with them. 

He listened as a lull came in the conversation and carefully cleared his throat, drawing the attention of the others. 

“I have a senior showcase this weekend for my BFA. It’s at six in the evening in the Wayne Arts Center on Gotham Campus. I would be happy to see you all there,” he said hesitantly, eyes firmly trained on his plate of food. 

“That sounds nice, Tim. I’ll try to be there,” Bruce said politely before going back to his conversation with Jason and Dick. Tim felt eyes on him, though, and slowly looked up to find his little brother giving him a curious look. 

“What?” He asked, still trying to calm his heart just a bit. He still wasn’t sure why he came to these things, why he was even here. Just talking to the Waynes gave him anxiety. Just being here reminded him how much he didn’t belong. How other he was compared to the rest of the kids that Bruce had adopted? 

Damian tilted his head to the side. “I was not aware that you were getting your Bachelor's in Fine Arts. Will you tell me about your degree program? I have been thinking about getting an Art History degree but have been torn between that and a business degree.”

Tim gave him a small smile and rested his chin on his hand as he started to tell Damian all about his degree and how he was enjoying the program at Gotham University. The rest of the family went on to their own conversations while Damian listened with rapt attention to Tim describing the ATC program at Gotham U. 

The rest of the week was a whirlwind as he prepared for his senior showcase, he had sent out invitations to everyone he wanted to come see his work. The Team had already made a reservation to take Tim to lunch before the showcase before helping him get everything ready. And as the day came to be, they had made good on their word, taking him to his favorite Vietnamese restaurant in Gotham before taking him to the gallery. He blushed as he listened to his three best friend gush over his artwork, as they listened to him explain each piece. They asked questions and made remarks about what their favorite pieces were and even tried to buy a few pieces only for Tim to promise to give each of them prints of his photos. 

The three had left with quick goodbyes, each one giving Tim a hug and congratulating him before they made their way from the gallery. The rest of the evening dragged on as people came by and asked Tim about his photos and the small films that played on the movie screen on one wall. He smiled and explained each photo to anyone who asked. He had wanted to showcase his vigilante photos of the bats and birds but it had been too much of a risk to do so. 

Instead he had shown off his photos that showcased all of his favorite parts of Gotham. From the beautiful gothic architecture, the gargoyles that looked out over the city. He showed the photos from the last time Ivy had thrown a fit in Robinson Park and covered the entirety of the grounds with flowers. He showed the pictures of community from Crime Alley and the beauty of the strength of Gothamites who had managed to survive the worst of the worst. 

He also featured pictures of his family, of Dick hanging from a chandelier, of Damian training Titus to do a trick. He had a picture of Bruce, Alfred, and Jason sitting side by side as they each read a different book. One showed Cass as she posed for the camera in her favorite ballet form. They were some of his most treasured memories, there for everyone to see and enjoy. Tucker between the one of Damian and the one of Dick was a photo of Tim. He had taken forever to set up the camera and get the timer right. Alfred had simply chuckled the entire time as he continued to offer to take the picture for Tim but no one was meant to be behind the camera for that picture. It was the only family portrait of his entire family. Cass, Damian, Tim, Dick, Jason, Bruce, Alfred, they all sat smushed into a single couch together, wide smiles and laughs on each of their faces as Tim beamed from the far side, leaning into Alfred’s side. 

The gallery was meant to showcase culture that was important to Tim. To showcase the life that he loved and treasured. And even if he never felt like he quite fit in the Wayne Family, even though he knew that he was the expendable one, the replacement, he still treasured his family. It was why he had invited them, he had wanted them to see just how important they were to Tim. And maybe they would realize he was important to them too.

Only, the rest of the evening seemed to drag on, and not a single person from his family ever stepped through the door. He waited, shoulders tensed and smile polite. Every bit the gentleman that Janet Drake had trained him to be as he stood with his hands clasped in front of him. He kept glancing at the clock, waiting for Bruce or Dick or someone to walk through the doors, to say hello and look at all the work that Tim had put in the last four years in college. The hours ticked by until it was nearing ten pm and the gallery started to clear out, custodians came in and started to clean up around him. 

Tim cast one final look at the doors before he turned to his photos and started to take one off of the wall. 

“Master Timothy! I am so sorry that we are late,” a voice said and Tim quickly to find Alfred and Damian walking through the doors of the gallery. A small smile spread on Tim’s face as Damian bound forward. 

“I apologize,” Damian said softly, staring up at Tim with disgruntled eyes. “I got into an argument with Father and then Titus scared Alfred the Cat and we spent the last three hours searching for that blasted cat and when we realized the time we came straight here,” he said. “What did the others think of your exhibit?”

Tim’s smile fell and he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “They uh, they didn’t show up,” he said quietly. “But if you’d like, you guys are the last ones to show up. I’d love to show you everything.”

Alfred’s face fell at that as he stepped forward and clasped a hand on Tim’s shoulder. “That is their loss, my dear boy. I would love to see your work,” he said. Before he could stop himself, Tim pulled Alfred in for a tight hug, burying his face in the old butler’s chest as he held him close. 

“Thank you,” he whispered before pulling away. He glanced down at Damian and smiled. “How about I show you my work and then if my advisor is still here you can meet her and talk to her about the ATC program.”

The fourteen-year-old nodded his head once. “I would appreciate that,” he said before grabbing Tim’s hand hesitantly. He followed quietly as Tim showed them his pictures of Gotham, explaining the stories behind each one before he showed them his favorite pictures. His pictures of home and both men let out soft gasps as they looked at them. 

“Master Timothy, these are beautiful,” Alfred said, stepping forward to take in the picture of him, Bruce, and Jason. 

“The lighting for this is amazing, I did not know that I even smiled like that,” Damian said softly as he took in the picture of him smiling at Titus. 

“Oh Tim,” Alfred said quietly, losing all strict politeness that Alfred held so dear to his heart as he took in the family portrait. “This is amazing, Timothy. So absolutely perfect. I remember when you took this photograph. It was right after Thanksgiving dinner last year.”

“I was so irritated, Todd had gotten mashed potatoes in my hair,” Damian said with a huff, a small smile tugged on his face. 

“I did not even realize that Master Richard and Master Jason were hugging in this picture,” Alfred said, a soft smile sti on his face as he took in the way Dick had his arms wrapped around Jason’s shoulders, a wide smile on his face as he laughed at something Jason had said. A small smile sat on Jason’s face, his eyes brighter than Tim had seen since the older man had come back from the dead. 

Alfred tore his eyes from the picture. “How much?” he asked. 

Tim blinked. “What?”

“How much for the picture?” Alfred asked him, turning back to the family portrait. 

“For you?” Tim asked, blinking again in surprise. “Free of charge, considering it a thank you for coming to my senior showcase.”

“I would like this one of Titus and me,” Damian piped up. “It would be lovely on my desk in my bedroom.”

Tim sniffed, his chest tightening slightly. “I would be more than happy to give you both the original copies.”

“Timothy,” Alfred said, turning back to Tim, that soft, kind, smile on his face once again. “I am so incredibly proud of you.”

The vigilante’s eyes burned furiously. “I-I thank you,” he said, a soft sob slipped out of his mouth before small arms wrapped around him. Damian hugged him tight, his face pressed against Tim’s chest. 

“I am so sorry that our family forgot to come to your showcase, Timothy,” he said stiffly. “You are incredibly talented and it is their loss for missing out on this.”

Tim pressed a hand to Damian’s back, feeling tears building behind his eyes that threatened to spill over. “Thank you,” he whispered. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly before he looked around and spotted his advisor. “There’s Professor Maheshawen. She’s my advisor. We can go talk to her and you can ask your questions, okay?”

Damian nodded and pulled away carefully, smoothing down the front of his sweater before he followed after Tim to meet his professor. Leaving Alfred to continue staring at the pictures with a kind smile on his face.

Alfred Pennyworth looked at the smiles on his charges faces and let out a breath. One of these days, Bruce and the others would realize just how important Timothy was to their family, how he was the one who held them all together. He only hoped that they would not realize that lesson too late in life. At the very least, Damian was now starting to understand just how wonderful Timothy Drake was. 

#Tim Drake #Detective comics #Red Robin #Drabble #Damian Wayne #batfam #Batfamily #alfred pennyworth #dis writes #dis dreams

[jymwahuwu]

I know omegaverse is not your thing, but I feel this urge to share this with you because the yandere plot material.

If you haven't known already, there's this thing called "bitching" in omegaverse, where an alpha can turn other alpha or beta into omega through the insemination of their semen. Because of this I've always been thinking of fem!reader who are alpha or beta, living their best life since they are not in the bottom of the food chain (lmao), then suddenly the universe decided to put her and Jing Yuan/Blade (or other characters, you name it) on the same plate together.

If it's Jing Yuan, it can be that the reader got chosen as his assistant, since you're an alpha/beta, and you won't get horny because of JY's alpha's pheromones.

But Jing Yuan being Jing Yuan, he takes interest in you. It's rare for a woman to become an alpha, and as an alpha himself, he can't help but feel intrigued. It's like God just sent him a challenge to conquer, and who is he to deny such an interesting thing being offered to him?.

He starts slow, gaining your trust. Then he asked you if he can fuck you since he's been curious to fuck an alpha woman. You are hesitant at first, but thinking it's just one time sex, you agreed.

Oh but oh, Jing Yuan knows. He's willing to take the long route to make you completely fall into his hands, to finally rip you off of what is your pride, your alpha status. Aside from that, he also has been very curious about the process of turning alpha/beta into omega--and you just happen to be the perfect fit for him.

He only asks for a sex once every few months, so you will be brushed off of your worries about turning into an omega, it's just... Jing Yuan had a trick up his sleeve for this. Every time it's about time he fucks you, he will drink a potion/medicine to make his seed even more potent.

So, even though the frequency of sex is only once in a few months, the potency of his seed is also 10x times stronger so it'll most likely turn you into omega. At this point, Jing Yuan is so ready to make you his little housewife, and after maybe a few months or even years, he asked, yes, asked, not propose bcs this is JY--to make you his wifey. At first you are happy, because holy shit both of you are going to be an alpha couple who reign Luofu! (In your dreams).

But after marriage, Jing Yuan forced you to stop working. He wants you to stay at home and be a good lil' housewife, much to your disappointment. He also now likes to whisper nasty things to your ears, like how much he can't wait to breed you, to fill your womb with his baby seeds and make you pregnant. You only giggle and smack him playfully whenever he does that, but you can't help but shake the hint of worry that you have when you see his serious smile.

Then after maybe a few weeks, you started feeling strange, it's as if your body was undergoing some changes and you are not sure why. You tried to ask Jing Yuan, but he only smiled and said it's just your hormones acting up. Maybe you feel a bit uneasy because it's almost mating time for alphas. You should not be worried, he'll help you when he gets back from work.

That's what you hope, at least. But suddenly your body went into heat during the evening, and you can feel your whole body burning. It's uncomfortable, and when you suddenly ravage through Jing Yuan's dirty clothes, your brain somehow gets the gist of what happened.

When Jing Yuan's back, you attacked him, both physically and with questions. Yet before you can mutter a single word your nose inhales his scent and your brain goes into overdrive. You tremble on his hold, trying to suppress a moan from escaping from your mouth. You can feel your legs tremble, did you just cum from the mere scent of him alone?.

Through haze and your hair falling out on your face, you can make out a sickening smile on his handsome face.

Jing Yuan will make sure you can't escape him, no matter what you do. Every night, when you are asleep he will whisper into your ears, saying how sweet you are as his wife and how you should just stay with him forever...and to never run away from him. He diligently does it every night without fail, to make sure it was being planted into your subconsciousness.

Oh and how happy he was when he finally got to mark your neck, claiming you as his mate. And to finally knot your pussy, making sure you are pregnant with his babies.

Jing Yuan always wanted to have a sweet and submissive wife, yet also not so dumb it's making him mald. But in this kind of world, it's hard to look for such criteria, having most women being an omega, most of them that he saw are either made ready to be a wife with no other skill, or very aggressive, and Jing Yuan doesn't want an aggressive wifey :((

So when you finally appear in his life, it's like he almost hit a jackpot. He mourns the fact that you are an alpha, it's only when he remembers the method of bitching Jing Yuan decided to roll his luck again.

For an alpha to be turned into an Omega, the recipient alpha needs to be willing to be filled with the other alpha. So Jing Yuan needs to make sure you are willing to accept him.

So when you finally turned into an omega, Jing Yuan couldn't help his excitement. He lets out all of the nasty words he could think of, telling you that you become omega because you are extremely willing to receive his seed (totally not also because he drinks those potent medicine to help), and that you want this, you wanted to be his housewife.

"see darling?, You don't even fight back against me. Your body wants it, no matter how hard your brain thinks otherwise. Don't worry, I'll take care of you...forever".

Sorry if this is very messy lol. It's 4 am and I just realized I write this for like an hour?? Wtf I should get some sleep instead of writing horny ass fanfiction on someone's askbox.

CW: yandere, ABO, alpha! reader forced to change to omega, gaslight, non-con

I couldn't help but giggle while reading 🤭💕 receiving these ABO stories that aren't cliche…thank you for sharing this!! even though I'm not really interested in ABO I don't mind if you put such hot fic in my askbox lol

The proud reader being disempowered is one of my favorite tropes. My submissive heart is trembling🥴 Okay, let me add a little drama.

This space society is just unfair. You heard a Beta say this once. As one of the top people in this society, you don't know what this sentence means, or you know it, but you just don't have the opportunity to understand it personally. Omegas can't even do much work because it's like carrying their scent with them like entering a pack of wolves. Betas can't resist orders, and people often think of them as "imperfect choices." As an Alpha, you are charming, confident, powerful and often successful. Just like this time, you can get Jing Yuan's assistant position without much effort.

Um, people in the Seat of Divine Foresight love to flirt and chat with you. They quietly put small gifts on your desk to express their adoration and admiration, hoping to win the favor of a successful person like you. Even after you agreed to have sex with the General every few months, you didn't stop them. You just don't have the consciousness to be his future wife, right? Those people realized that your current "mate" was General Jing Yuan, and gave up the idea of ​​being with you. And you are wondering why the Beta/Omega you dated last time is avoiding your eyes now.

For the potion part 😚🤭👉👈 Jing Yuan consulted experts who prepared the medicine and asked them to increase the effect to 10 times and minimize unnecessary side effects. This means that one time has the effect of ten times. Those first few times, you acted just as dominant as he did, even asking to penetrate him instead of him penetrating you. He won't allow this. As a small concession, he allows you to command him, a few times. This medicine is really effective. At a later stage, you don't even realize that you don't want to order him anymore, you just spread your legs and enjoy being pushed and picked up, moaning in pleasure. Even your inner being is prepared for this change.

After you fell into a deep sleep, Jing Yuan spread your thighs to check your progress. Your private parts swelled up, and the part representing Alpha became miniscule. And eventually, this should disappear. He wants to know if you notice this when you look in the mirror, or if you feel too ashamed to tell anyone. With a mysterious smile, Jing Yuan used his index finger to push the leaked seed in again. This is preparation for you to be a submissive and pregnant wife.

After agreeing to get married, you still dreamed of managing Luofu with Jing Yuan. A couple of Alphas >-<! You know that you gradually fell in love with the general while getting along. Is there any ideal life than ruling and managing this Xianzhou ship with the one you love? This is what people expect from you. Rule and manage, give orders. Although you felt weird inside, like you no longer wanted this… However, after the wedding, Jing Yuan immediately relieved you of all your duties and told you to stay at home and be a housewife. You're disappointed, but there's nothing you can do.

You were so desperate on the day of your complete transformation - desperately looking for traces of Jing Yuan and caressing yourself, digging out his clothes and grabbing them to calm your mind a little. You whimpered like a sweet puppy clinging to your husband's clothes, tying all the weird clues together and realizing what he had been planning all along.

The sweet pheromones flowed out without opening the door. Jing Yuan shuddered when he smelled this, and then he smiled so much that his eyes narrowed. It worked. As soon as the door opened, you rushed over to scratch his chest, but as weakly as a kitten. You wanted to accuse and question him, but instead you snuggled against his chest. An orgasm, an unexpected and violent release. Your eyes held shock and confusion, and tears fell.

Jing Yuan has been looking forward to mating with the Omega version of you, but wanted to tease you. He took away all your clothes, folded them, stored them deep in the closet, and locked them. Place you on a blanket with his pheromones. He had heard that such preparation could give Omegas a sense of security like a nest and increase their chances of conception. He asked you to wrap yourself in a blanket and wait, and he had to leave for a while to review documents/take a shower.

You rub the blanket and caress yourself uncontrollably, squirting more than once, and at the same time you feel a sense of relief… being pregnant and taking care of a baby…? After that, Jing Yuan takes you to the bed to mate and fill you with his seed. Your butt is pressed on the bed and shaken. The thick penis is heated and buried deep inside you, stimulating your sweet spot. That creamy pump is full inside you and knotting.

And gaslight💀💔🤚Yes, Jing Yuan has been adding subconscious hints to your heart - that is, you want to be an Omega, get pregnant and be his wife. How could your body change like this if you didn't want it to? Orgasm and moan like this? The only obviously reasonable explanation is that you want this.

Are those memories of you leading and commanding, being loved and adored still fresh in your mind?

Looking in the mirror now, you are moaning, orgasming and brainless, ready to conceive. It's just a reminder that you didn't know who you really were in the past.

#yandere hsr #yandere honkai star rail #yandere jing yuan #yandere hsr x reader #yandere jing yuan x reader #honkai x reader #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you

[beck404]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!

Always remember you’re loved and SO valid no matter your sexuality, gender identity, the labels you use, if you’re unlabelled, queer, etc. The queer community is really big so please remember to be kind to others, their experience might not be the same as yours (just as your experience might not be the same as everyone else’s) but we have all struggled with something. Spread love, spread validation and be PROUD of who you are!!

That being said, remember that you don’t owe your sexuality to anyone! It is YOUR decision to come out or keep it private, you don’t have to feel pressured to come out, know your sexuality or even label it. You are you and nobody else can tell you who or what you are!

Also a HUGE thank you to Alice for creating the hearstopper universe, the way it celebrates the LGBTQ+ community in such an authentic and inclusive way, the representation i never thought i’d see i now see it every day thanks to you!! My words will never be able to describe how grateful i am, but thank you for giving me Nick Nelson, the bisexual representation i so desperately needed 🩷💜💙

#happy pride 🌈 #YOU ARE LOVED #AND VALID #pride month #lgbtq #heartstopper #heartstopper comic #heartstopper netflix #gay #bisexual #lesbian #trans #trans rights #queer #heartstopper 2 #nick nelson #charlie spring #nick and charlie #nick x charlie #narlie #kit connor #joe locke #heartstopper cast #heartstopper news #alice oseman #alice oseman art #i was born for this #loveless #osemanverse

[bottlehawk]

happy pride month! why each hs kid got kicked out of their local gsa group:

john: accidentally introduced kink at pride discourse on steven universe night. also used the wrong lesbian flag emote on discord

rose: introduced kink at pride discourse on steven universe night on purpose. called out the ruling poly sextuplet for only including one person of color in a 53% minority congressional district. tweeted that she sided with harry styles in the war against harry styles.

dave: made fun of the rgb autism pride flag without realizing it was a real flag. asked a he/him lesbian why he used he/him pronouns and then said it was okay for him to ask because his sister is also a lesbian. leaked facebook post from 2007 saying slurs when he was in middleschool and then apologized by saying he doesn't listen to eminem anymore.

jade: ran for vice president of the gsa while also being president of mathletes team and treasurer for art club. publicly apologized for the conflict of interest once she read in the official pledge that you can't be an elected official in more than two different clubs and then banned herself publicly at her inauguration. no one brought this up btw she just did this herself

jane: caught eating at chick-fil-a in someone's private story at 2 in the morning which also got her kicked out of theatre club for breaking the vegan pledge signed amongst the ensemble cast. is currently in shambles.

jake: called himself a "transexual" and then doubled down on it when corrected. recommended "some like it hot" for gsa movie night.

roxy: defended jake calling himself a "transexual" and walked out while taking half of the poly sextuplet with her. has now formed her own poly queer platonic quadruplet which has been getting the gsa discord mods nervous with the new competition in town.

dirk: also defended jake calling himself a "transexual" but did it too late to not look like a poser. genuinely tried to engage with rose's kink at pride discourse on steven universe night

#homestuck #john egbert #rose lalonde #jade harley #dave strider #dirk strider #roxy lalonde #jane crocker #jake english #bottlehawk text #happy pride

[yourpsicodelicbitch]

astro thoughts 🏇🌈✨💫🍳

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH ❤️ even though it’s almost July

disclaimer: I didn’t check my orthography

i hate it but what’s trying to tell me the universe. my friend reminds me of my mom 😭 kill me pls. she have sun 11H, she worries a lot about how others understand what she saids, what others may think of her. she wants to be peaceful but at the same time she have moon in scorpio so she’s struggling and she have a certain opinion about others based on the first impression or what made more impact -negative? idk. now I feel judge -I think it’s my anxiety-. Update: i said what was bothering me to her and everything is said, I’m proud of me, I’m in peace, she responded in a understanding manner. I can breath.

the degree of your ascendant says ALOT, not only about the physical appearance. it could point out even your career, how’s focused your life, how you react…now that I think about it, it’s like an ascendant in your ascendant pc (but if it confused you ignore it).

for example, my friend have gemini degree in his ascendant, he’s doing his major in communication, his family is full of artists and specially musicians, so he grew up knowing how to play every music instrument, it’s like breathing to him, music. he’s used to it and he express himself by composing and being curious, wanting to know about this and that. other example: my other friend has a gemini rising but I was thinking “there’s something that’s missing” 👀 the leo degree of course. he be slayyiing💅 he’s sassy. he knows what he wants and people always be wanting him not the other way around 🙄 he’s like purr stunning gurl 💋

the same friend told me the other day that his first impression of me was or exactly what he thought: “you don’t want to mess with her” “I wouldn’t mess with her ever”. he told me I remembered him of maddy of euphoria -I gave him the idea bc I didn’t understand and he agreed-. Ascendant - Saturn aspects make you look like a bad bitch, like they’ll kick your ass if you don’t do what they tell you, THEY ARE. The structure of their face is also bony. They look like they’re mad, like they’re on their way and if you step there you’re dead: karmic. The jawline, omg, is sharp, it could cut you.

Picture 1 Picture 2 Picture3

Also, bc Capricorn is ruled by Saturn, Capricorn ascendants and saturn-ascendant aspects share characteristics but are not the same? Capricorn risings have this cheekbones that are so sensual and even if they age, the cheekbones are still there, what you notice first is that. What they share is the intimidating aura strangers perceive. In different levels or forms I believe.

Dakota Johnson Gisele Bündchen

TWO QUEENS THAT I CANT FINISH TO DESCRIBE HOW THEIRE SO ETHEREAL BEAUTIFUL STUNNING ICONIC AND INFINITE THINGS MORE

I have Mars in Retrograde. I don’t know what bothers me until I explode or until I go to my psychologist. I minimize what bothers me and save it all in the back, so then my brain will hurt. I don’t figure out or notice when something bothers me bc I don’t think is a big deal or that’s a joke, but even if it’s a joke I can still not like it -a side note-. You’ll find me realizing later what was bothering me and then struggling to tell people how I really felt when they did THAT something.

Picture from Pinterest

when the kid’s mercury is sextile Saturn’s dad (synastry: mercury sextile saturn), it means the dad communicates with their child as a way of teaching, caring about them. through their communication, they share childhood stories, experiences of any type and what they have learned about them, what they have observed. trough their talking they share their wisdom. the father have all the attention of their kid when he opens his mouth. the kid somehow knows something important is about to be said or they admires their dad that much.

Picture from Pinterest

Leo moons 5H + aries degree can be pretty egoist, they could lost themselves in the idea of something, of having it. Also they don’t think, twice letting themselves be carried by the emotion that idea gives them. They’re in their pretty little world of fun but they are not looking what’s happening to others, they’re hungry for their passion. I HAVE TO TELL: not everyone with these placements are like this and blablabla -the same thing I say for precaution- AND I had something, it’s not even something 🙄 I had nothing with these placement k? but it gives you an explanation for my attitude. STILL, I think I gotta mention some of the synastry so it’ll make sense. In another time bc I don’t want to waste my energy in that -and don’t want to-.

Saturn in opposition with Uranus aspect makes the individual stay in the doubt. They’re stanched while they keep analyzing the pro and cons of the situation they want to start/be part. Even if someone extern try to help, they’ll be doubting more.

Virgo moons are just so wholesome ☹️❤️ They want to help. they’re always doing something. they want the best for you. they care of others as if they take care of themselves but better, sadly. they work too much they need a rest but they know they’ll be anxious of doing nothing. they’re just pure souls. they’re so kind. always helping in a ONG/organization that helps needed ones.

Aquarius mercury always have something to say, they’re always right 🙄 even though they say it’s comprensible and natural that everyone have their own beliefs I don’t believe them. I think they think their mindset is better and everyone should follow it. LIKE GURL WTF I know you think you are wise and shit and you’ve passed through experiences that made you learned and that inspired you to tell them to others BUT let others make mistakes and be wrong, let others don’t be like you, there’s the beauty. I always find them criticizing others for their manners, as if they have lived the same way you did.

I don’t believe/trust? in libras, yeah ok may be that my sun is in libra but not my whole chart. That’s what I’m talking about, with that last sentence I’m gaslighting you 💌 how tf you believe in libras when they don’t tell the truth directly I CANT. With my honesty I gotta mention that my libra sun appear when I don’t want to ruin something that benefits me, when I don’t know the person and I try my best, to my sag/scorpio/aquarius placements to not appear. They always keep something in their minds, they don’t tell you all, they keep to themselves some part, could be to not hurt you, doesn’t benefits them or whatever. a friend with moon in libra degree and another with libra moon: I always want them to say what they want, they can’t. I want to squish the hell out of them bc I can’t too😭🔪

Ceres 3H is a good placement for a psychologist. How they motivate others using their minds, that easily absorbs and process/analyses experiences and knowledge, to finally find a solution depending on the case -of the patient-, so it’ll be suitable. When they help others, their communication keeps improving with time. More experience = better. Still, it’s natural.

—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•

❀ Based on my personal experience.

❀ English is not my first language.

❀ I’m not a profesional astrologer.

Thank youu. baibaiii🫣🫶🏼💋

Do not copy. Please give me credits.

#astrology #astro observations #pinterest #astro posts #astro notes #astrologia #astro placements #birth chart #saturn aspects #ascendant #capricorn ascendant #11h placements #scorpio moon #mercury aspects #synastry #mars retrograde #Gemini #maddy euphoria #leo moon #5H #uranus #ceres #aquarius mercury #libra #virgo moon #happypridemonth #astro thoughts

[sweetandscarlet]

unrequited love | pt 1

notes: hi everyone ! it’s been a while since i’ve posted something, unfortunately it was out of my control up until recently and i’m finally not shadowbanned :)

words: 4.2k

warnings: stepmom!wanda (32), stepdaughter!reader (22 & afab), yearning, alludes to smut in certain parts of the chapter ! eventual smut, eventual cheating - this chapter is just fluff, reader being an absolute simp for wanda and plot building. next chapter which i’m working on will literally just be pure smut (with a little bit of plot, idk how many parts i want to make this tbh). minors DNI!

guilt had become the constant in your life.

you had never felt such a strong feeling before, and as much as you tried to swallow it down and go about your day as normal, the gnawing ache of shame ate away at you until all you were left with is a hollow shell of disgrace.

in your defence, you and your little life were perfectly fine before now, it was you, your dad, a few close friends and your wonderful girlfriend who you had been dating for quite a while now. you were content and happy until a certain woman came crashing into your life unexpectedly like a bulldozer and flipped your world and everything you knew upside down.

albeit, none of this was her fault. all she did was meet a man and fall in love. how was she supposed to know the man had a shitty daughter?

well, that's how you'd best describe yourself. you felt sinful and disgusting every time your eyes stayed fixated on the older woman for a second too long. every time a smooth patch of her skin was exposed from her shirt innocently riding up and all you wanted to do was reach out and feel her soft, milky skin under your fingertips. 

or your mouth, either or was fine with you.

you hated how much of the woman consumed your thoughts throughout the day. what she was doing, if she was having a busy day at work, if she'd had plenty of sleep, drinking water, was taking care of herself.

all thoughts that you should be relating to your girlfriend, not your stepmother.

but alas, you were and all you could do was pretend like the woman wasn't the first thing on your mind when you woke up and the last thing when you went to sleep.

it was proving really hard to do when she wasn't a cliched wicked stepmother. you honestly would prefer it if she was, but instead, she was perfect, poised and so, so pretty. she treated you like you were her own and was so sweet to you, it made you feel sick. 

you were now six months into your spiral of shame. your stepmother and father were happy and your girlfriend was still blissfully unaware of the crush you harboured for the older woman. you kind of wanted to pride yourself on how well you've hidden the feelings. it was painfully difficult, to say the least. she was and is the most beautiful woman you had ever laid eyes on. so smart and funny and charming and-

"y/n, are you listening to me?"

your head shot up as a voice pulled you out of your thoughts. the voice belonged to a concerned redhead who was perched in front of the island in the kitchen, her hands skillfully cutting up vegetables for the dinner you'd be sharing.

"i- sorry wanda, i'm just tired. i didn't get much sleep last night. what were you saying?"

the older woman frowned at that. her mind thinking of all the possibilities as to why. were you stressed about university? girlfriend trouble? the strong urge to fix whatever problem you had quickly replaced whatever thought wanda currently possessed.

"aw no, how come, my love? are you using the tea i bought for you? you know, my mother always said-"

"chamomile tea helps you get eight hours of sleep, i know, i know. are you sure you're not just making that up?" you tease, an eyebrow wiggling at her as she continues to dice her bell peppers. "i mean, as a soon-to-be holder of an english lit degree, i for one have never heard of that saying"

wanda eyed you playfully, her hands still working on autopilot as the knife carefully sliced the ingredients below her. you had seen her do it plenty of times before and it still never failed to impress you.

"well, smarty pants i think you've forgotten i'm sokovian. ever heard of a little something called translation?"

you rolled your eyes at that. of course, you hadn't forgotten, it was also another aspect of wanda that consumed your every waking thought. the way her r's rolled off of her tongue, her accent growing thicker the sleepier or more frustrated she got.

everything about her voice never failed to make you ache with want.

“ya trenirovalsya, mozhesh' skazat'?” you gaily shot back, a small smile playing on your lips when you saw the redhead's eyes widen in surprise.

“my my, smart girl indeed, i can tell. you’re getting better" wanda mused as her gaze from you dropped to finish off the last of the vegetables before turning around to put them all in the simmering pan on the stove. "now, why aren’t you sleeping properly?"

your eyes slowly fell, the gnawing guilt returning as they landed on the swell of the sokovians' ass.

“uh, no reason” you mumble in response, your eyes staying trained on how well the jeans hugged every curve of hers. “i think it might be uni stress”

i’m lying. it’s you, i can’t stop thinking about you.

wanda placed the cutting board on the countertop next to the stove before turning back to face you. your eyes instantly dart up and you just pray she didn’t catch your lingering stare.

if she did, wanda didn’t show any sign of it.

“i’m sorry darling, is there anything i can help you with?”

you shot her a lopsided smile before clearing your throat and answering with a “i’ll be okay once finals are over, but thank you”

“i might not be your mumiya but i’m always here if you need me”

i do need you. in more ways than you know.

“that's mommy, right? well, you're a better one than she'll ever be”

it didn't dawn on you until a few seconds later. your mouth just moving without ever thinking about how it would sound.. or maybe you're just overanalysing this? your gaze drops to your hands as you mindlessly start playing with your fingers nervously. not everyone believes that word to be sexualised, right?

“i-“ wanda cleared her throat, turning to busy herself with the pan behind her. “i’m glad you think of me as such, malysh” 

the older woman gripped at the wooden spoon she used to stir the food with. “now, why don’t you get your father from his study and i’ll dish everything out”

you were thankful wanda had yet to turn around, as a shy blush must be evident on your cheeks right now. “sure, wanda. thank you, by the way, it smells great”

the redhead couldn’t help but beam at your approval as she continued to mindfully stir the food before turning the gas off and moving the pan to an empty burner.

when she heard your footsteps retreat, wanda let out a sigh as her hands fell to grip the counter in front of her, willing herself to calm her beating heart and the pulse that formed much lower.

ᗢ

"so, how's it going with kate, y/n?" your father wasn't one to ask too many questions. the man would always let you do as you please, even as a kid. of course he was protective, but he also trusted your decisions. thus, usually keeping his curiosity to himself. "i haven't seen her around here much lately"

you continued to chew your food before raising your head to meet his small smile and kind eyes. "we've just both been busy, i guess. i am seeing her tomorrow though, we're going to a party and then going back to her house after"

the sound of cutlery clattering on a plate made you jump, the noise cutting through the silence of the room like a knife and you instantly turned your head to where the sound came from.

wanda sat there, unfazed at her disturbance as she stared back at you. her eyes narrowed in on you as she pursed her lips. "a party? what kind?"

you let out a chuckle at the question, your mind not quite registering the redhead's hard gaze and peeved demeanour. "the kind that you don't really remember the next day? you've heard of them, right?"

wanda sucked the tip of her tongue between her pearly white teeth and fought the urge to correct you on your bratty attitude. in actuality, if she was being honest with herself, you didn't have one at all, you were being your usual playful self. the older woman was just taken aback and albeit slightly annoyed at the mention of your partner. 

but, she was just looking out for you, right? like a good mother should, even if she was a step.

"yes, sweetheart, parties were around in the eighteen-hundreds"

the sound of your laugh helped ease some of the tension in the sokovians shoulders and she couldn't help but let a smile shine through as it echoed throughout her mind and invaded every sense of her being.

"damn, you all partied during the ipswich witch trials? that's hardcore, wanda, even for you"

wanda chuckled in response. "oh yeah, but i was just celebrating because i wasn't caught"

you sniggered at that, replying with a, "do you reckon i could still get the bounty if i ratted you out?" before returning to your food.

the redhead let out a playful gasp, her arm stretching over the corner of the dining table to swat at your shoulder. "you wouldn't dare! plus who would make you all these meals if i'm burned at the stake?"

you hummed at that, your finger coming to rest on your chin as you tapped at it, pretending to linger in thought on the question. "you make a point and i don't think i could survive without them"

the redhead beamed proudly at that before she heard the telltale sign of her husband's impatience and feelings of being left out as he cleared his throat.

"so, about that party, y/n. when are you thinking of leaving?" he asked, before placing his fork on his now-empty plate.

wanda mentally rolled her eyes, her sour mood instantly returning at the question. that was until an idea popped into her head and the scowl that formed on her face quickly inched into a smirk. "how about you stay in with me tomorrow night instead? your father will be gone for his conference and i could sure use the company"

you struggled to swallow down your food as your mouth dried up and you immediately reached for the glass of water to ease it down.

"oh, that's a great idea!" your father intervened, the sound of wood scraping against the floor as he pushed back his chair and stood up. "a bit of mother-daughter bonding time might help alleviate your stress"

your eyes stayed trained on your plate as you tried to muster up any excuse you could think of as to why that wouldn't be such a great idea.

unfortunately, your brain short-circuited and your mind went blank.

"i- but what would i tell kate and the rest of my friends?" you asked, your head raising to meet the redhead who was already staring back at you.

you wanted to audibly groan at the way she looked at you. soft, doe eyes bore into you and you found it impossible to deny her.

"you know what, just leave it with me, i'll tell them you're sick or something and i need to take care of you"

wanda's plump lips instantly curled into a smile at your response. exactly y/n, she thought. you need to take care of your mommy.

ᗢ

the next morning you were awoken by the sound of a sweet voice humming the tune of a song you didn't know, the sound started small until it faded into earshot and grew louder.

you turned your body onto your back to stretch, and your eyes soon flickered open to see wanda towering over you. a mug of steaming tea in one hand and two slices of toast on a small plate in the other.

"good morning, i thought i'd bring you breakfast in bed" the older woman smiled before placing them down on your bedside table.

when your eyes properly came into focus, you gulped dryly at the sight.

wanda was wearing a silk scarlet nightgown with a matching short robe to match, the colour was a striking contrast to the milky skin that lay underneath and your eyes flashed down to see she had yet to put on a bra. the cold morning air was clearly evident in the room as your eyes trailed away from pebbled nipples that strained behind her nightwear.

shit.

"thank you," you managed to croak out, one of your hands reaching up to wipe away the sleep from your eyes, using your other to push yourself upwards to rest your back on your pillows. "i'm excited for today, do you have anything in mind for what we should do?"

it took everything in you to not reach out a hand to yank your stepmom into your bed and have your way with her. because, god, how you longed to feel the warmth of her body underneath you as you trail your fingers over the apex of her hips and down to her soft thig-

"me too, malysh. i have some errands to do first, so while we're out we could do some shopping and grab some food?"

you nodded in response, a shy smile playing on your lips as the older woman's eyes bore into you. under wanda's gaze, you felt minuscule like a goddess who was staring down at you, a lesser deity.

but the sokovian never saw you in such a light, in her mind you were a woman worth worshipping. a magnificent being that should be held up on a pedestal for all the world to adore.

"good, i'll go and get dressed while you eat and get ready"

ᗢ

a few hours had passed since you woke up, and both you and wanda were now walking around the mall aimlessly with no destination or rush to be anywhere. the two of you just spoke about anything and everything until the occasional gasp left your lips when something caught your eye in a store window.

"do you want it?" the redhead would ask, her eyes trained on your face to gauge your reaction.

most of the time your eyes would widen upon seeing the price before sighing in defeat and setting it back on the shelf and muttering, "no, it's okay. i'll wait until my birthday or something"

against your wishes, wanda would pick up what you held in your hands moments ago before waltzing over to the tills, her hips swaying with purpose as she quickly pays for it. wanda then walks back to you like it was no big deal with the said item now in a plastic bag as she hands it to you.

soon enough you were now walking through the mall with a few bags in your hands and wanda carrying the rest in hers.

guilt weighed heavy on your chest as you looked down at what you were holding. wanda, who was walking a couple of steps in front of you turned to see your bottom lip jutted out and your eyebrows contorted.

"what's wrong, detka?," her legs came to a stop and her face was quickly etched with worry. "do want to leave?"

your eyes instantly met hers and you could feel the guilt building up your throat, threatening to spill at any given moment. "what? no, of course not! i'm sorry... i- i just feel bad that you've gotten me all of this stuff. i can't imagine it came cheap"

the sokovian shook her head with a chuckle. "don't worry about money, sweetheart i'm fine.. plus you deserve it. i want to spoil you, so don't feel bad about it"

as much as you wanted to argue that you didn't deserve it, you bit your tongue and smiled in response. "you're right, thank you wanda. i am really grateful for everything, although i do still feel bad, is there anything i can do for you?"

full pink lips curled into a small smirk at the question. there was definitely something she wanted you to do but she knew she could never ask that of you, could never step over the line and cross a boundary that should remain uncrossed.

you watched as wanda pondered for a moment before shaking her head. "thank you, y/n. but, i don't want anything in return, just being with you today is enough"

your heart swelled ten times at that and you instantly felt your heart beat deep and fast in your throat. this woman was going to be the death of you.

ᗢ

"so, how about i open a bottle of wine and you pick a movie for us to watch?" the sokovians' voice echoed loudly in your mind, pulling your attention away from the bags filled with everything wanda had bought for you.

you raised your head to see wanda standing in front of you. the position of you on your knees on the carpeted floor instantly dawned on you as the older woman's figure towered over you. you gulped dryly before pushing yourself upwards on your hands to stand face to face with the redhead.

"of course, wands. any suggestions?" you asked meekly, shifting your weight on your feet slightly as you tried your best to maintain eye contact with her.

your stepmother shrugged in response before taking a step back you almost wanted to whine and close the distance between you but you swallowed down the urge and kept yourself still, frozen like a statue.

"your choice, dorogoy. i'll be right back with the wine" and with that, wanda took even more several steps back until the distance grew. she then rounded the sofa and entered through the swinging door and into the kitchen.

you breathed a sigh of relief, a breath you didn't even realise you were holding. you willed yourself to calm your beating heart and moved over to the cabinet beside the television, your eyes scanning the selection of movies and box sets of tv shows.

your lips instantly curled into a smile upon seeing a certain one.

you opened the glass door before sliding out the box set, your hands racing to pull out one of the discs and quickly place it into the DVD player. you couldn't wait to see the look on wanda's face when she sees the loading-screen play on the television.

you heard the door swing open once again, wanda's sweet voice sounding behind you as she began to speak. "so what did you decide on?"

a gasp left her lips when her eyes landed on the television and saw the loading screen of her all-time favourite tv show.

"oh my god, the dick van dyke show?!"

you stood to turn around and face the older woman and you felt pride beam brightly in your chest at the smile that was plastered on her face.

"yeah," you said sheepishly, your cheeks flushing a hint of pink. "i know it's your favourite"

wanda stepped closer to the sofa before reaching down to place the two wine glasses and the bottle on the table in front of it. "you're too sweet, detka. i don't even think your father remembers that"

the pride enlarged even more at the fact and you couldn't help the evidential blush on your cheeks brightening. "well, dads stupider than i thought if he doesn't remember something like that about you"

it was now wanda’s turn to blush, and as she felt the heat rise to her cheeks she quickly busied herself with opening the wine and pouring it into both glasses, more so in hers than yours.

“i’ve actually never seen it before, you know?” you mention, before kneeling off the ground and wiping your now sweaty palms onto the jeans that hugged your thighs.

 “wow, really? well, there’s a first for everything," wanda smiled and you swear your heart skipped the smallest beat when you saw those dimples form in her cheeks. "i haven't seen that dragon show you like so much"

you make your way over to the sofa and plop yourself down, shifting slightly to situate yourself and get comfortable. "dragon sho- oh, you mean game of thrones?"

wanda hums in response as the rim of the glass sits perfectly on her lips to take a sip of her wine.

wanda watched intently as you mimicked her actions. the way your arm flexed when you leaned forward to pick up the glass and how your lips look deliciously wet as you licked away the lasting taste of the wine you had just sipped. it was a sight to see and it made the sokovian's head reel with lust.

"it's a great show," you finally respond, tucking your feet under yourself before leaning back onto the comfy cushions behind you. "i could show it to you sometime, maybe? it's well-acted and has great storylines in it, just be prepared for a lot of sex scenes"

wanda sniggers at that, "medieval porn? i'm sold"

you laugh loudly, the sound escaping you before you could even attempt to lower the volume. you almost want to apologise for the outburst but when you turn your head to wanda, she's staring back at you with a cheshire cat grin that eases your anxiety.

ᗢ

the night carried on smoothly, you and wanda laugh over the bottle of wine as you switch between watching the episodes of the dick van dyke show and talking about different topics and interests. the drunker you get the more random the conversations become.

and as you look at wanda, her smile reaching from ear to ear as she watches a scene unfold on the television, it only seems to make your drunken crush-filled mind worsen.

"wanda, can i ask you something?"

you clamp your mouth shut as soon as the words leave your mouth and you instantly mentally scold your brain for speaking without so much as a thought of the possible consequences.

wanda reaches forward to set her empty glass on the wooden table before shifting slightly to turn and face you. "of course, sweetheart. you can ask me anything"

you swallow dryly, making you lift your wine glass to your lips to finish off the rest of what's in there. you chew on your bottom lips nervously, your eyes staying focused on the glass in your hand. "can you.. does it make you a bad person if you're with someone and you like someone else?"

wanda's brows knit together as the words hit her ears. she stays silent for a moment before her lips part slightly, thinking of the best way to answer such a question. "i think that's a query that could have many different answers, moya lyubov"

she pauses for a moment.

just a moment and the tranquillity makes you hear your heart beat loudly in every pulse point of your body.

"why do you ask?"

you shouldn't say it. you really shouldn't.

but, the alcohol had settled within you a while ago and it left you tipsy, needy and with a newfound confidence that screamed at you to tell her everything. to just confess even if it could leave you humiliated and deflated. "well, the thing is.."

the words faded on your tongue, quickly dying as wanda's big green eyes bore into you and what felt like, your soul.

"go on," wanda urged, her arm reaching over to place a gentle hand on top of your thigh, just below your kneecap. she gave it a soft squeeze before continuing. "you can do it"

"i'm happy with kate, she's great. but, there's this other person and i just.. i don't know what to do. i feel like such a shitty person"

wanda arched an eyebrow, her lips parting just an inch. "okay, i- how long have you been seeing this other person?"

"the thing is, i haven't, it's complicated, they don't even know how i feel"

your heartbeat was deafening as it beat loudly in your ears. you should stop, this is a bad idea.

"i can't tell them because then it'll ruin everything and i like what we have right now but, i can't eat, i.. i can't sleep, they're all i think about and more"

wanda's grip on your thigh tightened as you spoke and all your brain could do was stare at her hand, using it as a fice to focus on, anything to keep your eyes from welling up and breaking like a dam as you splurge out the truth and every pent up emotion you've felt since wanda entered your life.

"oh, honey. i'm sorry this is happening, maybe you'll feel better if you're honest with this other person? i mean, what's the worst that could happen?"

you let out a shaky breath, your eyes pricking with tears as you look up from her hand and into the sea of green that lies beneath her eyes. "you could hate me"

"i don't understand- i could never hate you, y/n. how could i?"

you didn't respond, you couldn't. the words felt trapped in your mouth, the honesty dancing on your tongue in a silent battle with your brain and all you could do was hang your head in shame as wanda's body stiffened, her hand loosening its grip on you as her face soon turned to realization. "oh"

#wanda maximoff smut #stepmom wanda #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff/reader #mcu fanfiction #marvel mcu #elizabeth olsen

[escaped-cryptid]

Thinking about a “Wayne family once said” comp in universe

“Wait what’s an NDA? Ohhhhhh that’s what I signed” -Tim

“Wear a mask dipshits. Also raise medical staff wages” -Jason

“Huh, we’ll I think my public image is pretty good based one the writings on certain websites.” -Bruce

“I name my acts after what injury I got when I first try them” -Dick

Cont. “This one’s called Quad Tear!!”

“Do you think I have room for a flip” “NOT AGAIN” -Dick, Bruce

“Happy Pride month Crime is legal for the gays!” -Dick “Crimes always been legal for us we’re rich.” -Jason “Yeah but we don’t have to pay people this month” -Damian “Can you guys say anything without giving me a lawsuit” -Bruce

“I mean who doesn’t think night wing is hot, have you seen him?!” -Dick

“I was dead once 10/10” -Jason

“I have been told to accept that people believe I am ‘cute’ and ‘cuddly’ however false the statement may be” -Damian

#cryptid posts #incorrect quotes #batfam #jason todd #dick grayson #damian wayne #tim drake #brucie wayne

[blurredcolour]

The Witch of November

Summary: Jake and Bradley’s second deployment has you discovering a lot of things about yourself, including just how much the two men mean to you. Or When The Three Of You Realized What You Were.

Part of my Poly Hangster Universe. Read Part One - In Search Of Obliteration

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Jake “Seresin” Hangman x Female Reader [Hangster x Female Reader Polyamorous Relationship]

Warning: Angst, Mental Health Struggles, Nightmares, Lack of Appetite, Insomnia, Nail Biting, Stress-Induced Weight Loss, Anxiety, Unhealthy Coping Strategies, Difficult Discussions of Feelings, Rating – T.

Credit: Paramount Pictures

Word Count: 5120

The oldies playlist filled the quiet emptiness of the primary bedroom as you worked on folding the last of Bradley’s shirts into the storage tote. It was a poor replacement for the usual sounds of life that filled Jake and Bradley’s home, conversation, laughter, activity, but the songs from the 60s and 70s brought a continuity in their absence.

You smiled softly as you pulled another of his father’s tropical button-up shirts from the drawer, taking extra care as you folded the sleeves down the back, barely registering the song change to Gordon Lightfoot’s The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down Of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee The lake, it is said, never gives up her dead When the skies of November turn gloomy With a load of iron ore twenty-six thousand tons more Than the Edmund Fitzgerald weighed empty That good ship and true was a bone to be chewed When the gales of November came early

It was difficult to fathom the next four months without them. They’d had two weeks’ notice – fourteen days to prepare you for the face that they were being deployed for sixteen weeks at sea. It was not their first deployment since your meeting at the liquor store. Not long after that dream-like night you had spent with them, followed by the sun-drenched afternoon spent with their squad in the sundress they had ordered via Postmates, their colleagues too polite to pry at their flimsy introduction of you as a ‘new neighbour’, they had left for ten days.

At the time you’d had no more than a superficial understanding of their profession. Of the peril in which they put themselves on a daily basis – even more so during missions. A few emails had been exchanged between the three of you then but before you even really had a chance to miss them, they had shown up with your apartment bearing take out. The outcome had been four orgasms and a noise complaint.

The ship was the pride of the American side Coming back from some mill in Wisconsin As the big freighters go, it was bigger than most With a crew and good captain well seasoned

This time, however, everything was different. Nearly six-months into your relationship – well, for starters you felt confident calling it that. Perhaps the three of you could have done a better job defining things, but they had given you a key to their house, and you had a toothbrush that lived in the cup with theirs in the ensuite bathroom. Spending most weekends, and the occasional weeknight there, you had successfully avoided another noise complaint and fallen into a very natural rhythm with them.

So, when their orders had arrived, it had been a rather rude awakening. An intrusion in the happy idyll your trio had built, but not altogether unexpected. You’d done a remarkable job convincing Jake, Bradley, and even yourself that you would be all right; that they had no reason to worry about you. And when they decided to once again use a property management company and put their home up for short term rental in their absence? You’d also convinced them to save some money and let you take that on for them.

After all, you had a key and the time, it would be no issue for you to finish packing their things away into the garage and then stop in to clean between rentals. Concluding some terms with a couple of steel firms When they left fully loaded for Cleveland And later that night when the ship's bell rang Could it be the north wind they'd been feeling The wind in the wires made a tattle-tale sound And a wave broke over the railing And every man knew, as the captain did too ‘Twas the witch of November come stealing

You snapped the lid shut on the tote, grabbing your phone and tucking it into your pocket, letting the song continue to play as you carried the last load down the stairs and into the garage. Sliding the box into place, your eyes scanned over the stacks of totes and racks of garment bags – two lives tidily packed away, on hold.

The words of the song, now slightly muffled by the fabric of your pants yet still audible, began to register in your brain and you pulled your phone from your pocket to hear them better. Unbidden, the images sung by the folk singer of a horrific storm began to flood your mind. A helpless ship filled with mortal men dwarfed by the fury of nature.

Two men, who meant a great deal more to you than you had the nerve to put into words as they wolfed down their breakfast that morning, in a vast ocean. How easily they could not return – swept aside by a cruel wave, attacked by a wrathful nation, or eliminated by something so utterly mundane as human error. How easily you could be putting their things away for the very last time.

The unwelcome thoughts tore through your consciousness and had you stumbling back into the door frame that connected the garage to the rest of the house, gasping for breath as tears blurred your vision. The sheer cruelty of your mind, parading the worst possible outcomes through your brain in vivid detail, had you pressing a hand to the centre of your chest, trying to calm your racing heart. You felt sick and acutely alone in a house that was suddenly much too spacious, listening to a song that was far too gloomy.

“Good god, get a grip girl.” You snarled tearfully at yourself before barking a laugh that even you would have to admit rang hollow against the concrete floor.

Shaking your head viciously to clear the morbid thoughts of peril at sea from your head, as though it were an etch-a-sketch needing to be reset, you turned your rush of desperate energy toward skipping the last of the song. Inhaling deeply through your nose as the much more upbeat Surfin’ USA by the Beach Boys took over.

“Better…It’s just day one…. You’ve got this…” You wiped at a few rogue tears that had stolen down your cheeks before doing one last check that everything was stored properly, locking up the garage and heading back into the house to finish cleaning.

One hour – and many deliberate song choices – later, you finished mopping your way out of the house, turning off the lights as you went. Setting up a door code for the guests set the arrive the next day, you headed home near ten, finding it surprisingly easily to fall asleep. The dawn came late and the breakfast had to wait When the gales of November came slashing When afternoon came it was freezing rain In the face of a hurricane west wind When suppertime came, the old cook came on deck saying “Fellas, it's too rough to feed ya” At seven PM a main hatchway caved in, he said “Fellas, it's been good to know ya”

The problem reared its head once more in the inky blackness of the night, rain and saltwater lashing your face, stinging your eyes. You could hear Jake and Bradley screaming for you, their voices carried on the wind from opposite directions, impossible to pinpoint no matter how you twisted your body this way and that.

Something unseen collided forcefully with your body, plunging you into a dark, icy sea. You clawed futilely through the water, unable to discern up from down, left from right, as your lungs began to burn with the need for breath.

You thrashed yourself awake from your nightmare, fumbling with the switch on your bedside lamp, desperate for light to dispel the murk of the freezing water, movements still filled with the frenetic energy of a drowning victim. At last, the incandescent bulb clicked on, flooding the room with warm light, reminding you that you were in your bed…. safe….

But Jake and Bradley…. heaven only knew where they were. You hugged your knees to your chest and choked out a sob, feeling just as useless as you had in your dream. They could be screaming your name right now and there was absolutely nothing you could do to help them. In your weakened state, you were utterly defenseless against the onslaught of tears, so you simply turned your head to smother your ragged sobs into the plush of your pillow – not wanting to risk a noise complaint over this of all things.

The captain wired in he had water coming in And the good ship and crew was in peril And later that night when his lights went out of sight Came the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald

Terror and theoretical grief and something that you still stubbornly refused to name despite all evidence to its confirmation wrung every last tear from your body until your eyelids were swollen and heavy with irritation. Pulling your exhausted frame from the tangle of sheets and sodden pillows, you trudged to the bathroom to rinse your face, wincing at the person staring back at you in the mirror.

You had done such a good job of convincing Jake and Bradley, of convincing yourself, that you would be all right in their absence, that this sudden burden of anxiety and gut-wrenching fear felt like a betrayal to your own self. You were an adult. You understood what it meant to date a Navy man. Yet here you were, crying your eyes out about things you had absolutely no control over. Over things you were proud of your boys for doing.

So whatever selfish childishness had suddenly possessed you, it had to be quashed with brutal efficiency. It would be wildly unfair for either of them to even sense that you were struggling and the simplest solution to that was you just had to stop it right now. Despite the ruthless glare you were delivering yourself in the glass of the bathroom mirror, however, that traitorous body of yours had somehow found the wherewithal to produce fresh tears to send rolling down your hot cheeks.

“Fuck…” you croaked, sinking your face into your hands.

Does anyone know where the love of God goes When the waves turn the minutes to hours

Three weeks, two days, and five hours. Despite sending them an email every day, you did not hear from Jake or Bradley for three weeks, two days, and five hours after they left you at their house that morning. It was more than enough time for your nightmare to bloom into full grown neurosis.

Stern pep-talks in the mirror were a non-starter, so you began addressing the inevitable sleep issues with melatonin gummies. And when those produced nearly every side-effect on the bottle? Over-the-counter pain killers. The terror still managed to find you, however, even in your chemically enhanced sleep, and a set of dark circles took root beneath your eyes. Your make-up kit expanded, and your routine became longer to hide them.

You threw yourself into your job, desperately trying to fill every waking moment with activity, treading water above the yawning darkness of dread that lay just below the surface. Between overtime hours and managing Jake and Bradley’s house as a rental – cleaning between renters and being on call for any issues that may pop up – you had little time for socializing. Which suited you just fine, because you knew those who cared about you would see through your thinly veiled disguise of make-up and busyness and you were most certainly not ready for a real conversation about what was going on.

You were idly nipping at a hangnail on your index finger as you reviewed a client’s file when your phone buzzed with an email notification and you gasped audibly when their names popped up, making your co-worker shoot you an inquisitive glance.

“Sorry…” You whispered with a wince, scooping the phone off your desk and diving into your email app to read through their joint reply four times before finally exhaling in relief.

They were well. They were tired, but they were alive and missed you and appreciated your emails. You hugged your phone to your chest, not caring how dramatic it might look to your already suspicious colleague, a few tears of joy gathering along your lower lashes.

The searchers all say they'd have made Whitefish Bay If they'd put fifteen more miles behind her They might have split up or they might have capsized They may have broke deep and took water

The relief that one email brought was short-lived, affording one, maybe two good nights of sleep before you were plunged back into your cycle of agony. Your stomach grew averse to, and disinterested in, all food save your favourite ice cream, and after throwing out your fourth meal-prepped lunch you surrendered to its demands and proceeded to subsist entirely upon cartons of that.

You lost weight. Everyone seemed eager to tell you how good you looked as a result of it, which only seemed to twist the knife that had taken up residence between your ribs a little tighter. The circles beneath your eyes grew darker and your make-up kit expanded yet again. With all that you were juggling, you somehow failed to notice that you had chewed your nails raw – a self-soothing technique thoroughly acknowledged by the scientific community, but an action you remained blind to.

There were more email replies, with the promise of some possible phone connectivity in the coming weeks, but you were entirely immune to joy now…feeling not unlike a hollowed-out shell of yourself, filled with the black and white static of a television station that lost its signal.

And all that remains is the faces and the names Of the wives and the sons and the daughters

You were fighting with the first corner of the fitted sheet on the primary bed, the bed the three of you usually shared, when your phone started ringing with an unknown number. Releasing the stubborn fabric, you let the elastic spring back into place, mattress frustratingly bare as you picked up.

“Hello?” You answered, expecting it to be the couple slated to arrive tomorrow afternoon.

“Pretty girl, holy shit it’s so good to hear your voice.” Rooster’s rasped statement hit you like a physical blow to the chest, and you stumbled to a seat on the bed.

“Bradley?” Your voice waivered pathetically and you cleared your throat painfully. “Hey! Hey, it’s so lovely to hear yours.” You continued in a much sunnier, confident tone, scouring the tears from your eyes roughly with the heel of your palm.

He sighed your name warmly, but you did not miss the exhaustion that coloured his tone.

“Fuck, I am so sorry it’s taken this long to be able to call, I swear to god I’ve never been on communications blackout this long before. Everything ok?”

“Just great, well…I miss you both so much, but the rentals are running smoothly and work’s going fine, and the weather never changes here so I don’t have any complaints.” You were sure to smile, just like they taught you at work, so the happy tone would carry through the phone line. “You guys doing all right?”

“We are, you perfect woman, we are. Jake’s right here, falling asleep against the wall. Let me pass him the phone.”

There was some muffled scrambling against the receiver before Jake drawled your name, sounding even more exhausted than Bradley.

“Hey Jake, how’re you doing? You showing them all who’s the best?” You forced a grin, hoping to give him extra encouragement by stroking his ego.

“You know it, pretty girl. Me ‘n Rooster here are kicking all their asses…You promise to be extra desperate for us when we get home?”

You mustered a giggle for him, extremely thankful it was only a phone call so you could keep your expressions to yourself.

“You know it, Hungman…”

“Jesus Christ, I miss you…”

“Three weeks, Jake…” Not that you were counting, or anything.

“I can barely keep my eyes open pretty girl, I’m so sorry, I can’t wait to see you.”

“It’s ok Jake, please go get some rest, ok? I’ll see you soon.”

He murmured his goodbyes before Rooster came back on the line.

“Hey pretty girl, I’m not much longer for this world either.”

“I really appreciate you two taking the time to call me. I’ll see you both in three weeks.”

“Three weeks…” He sighed heavily. “I’ll try and email you our docking time and text you when we’re in the car ok?”

You had offered, initially, to drive them. To drop them off and pick them up, but the process for obtaining a pass was a lengthy one and though, none of you admitted it out loud, would have involved defining your relationship on paper. And so, they had departed in Jake’s pick-up truck, which was still waiting for them on base.

“Do what you can, have a good sleep, Bradley.”

“Night, pretty girl.”

You both stayed on the line a moment, listening to one another breathe, before he finally disconnected the call and you dissolved into tears as you sank onto the rug beside the bed.

Lake Huron rolls, Superior sings In the rooms of her ice water mansion Old Michigan steams like a young man's dreams The islands and bays are for sportsmen

With the final rental checked out, you had a week to put their house back together before Jake and Bradley returned home. You had been careful to write down where things had come from so that you could return them to their rightful place. You took to sleeping at their home so that when the inevitable nightmares or overthinking arrived, three am companions you had grown so very accustomed to over the past four months, you could simply roll out of bed and continue unpacking for them.

True to his word, Bradley managed to email you, letting you know they would be returning that Sunday morning. By Saturday noon, the house was in order, and you made a trip to the grocery store to stock their fridge so they could take it easy their first few days back. You made a special trip to their favourite bakery for some treats, as well, and when you ran out of things to do you went out and walked the beach. Your body was a sharp contrast of fatigue and nervous energy, everything inside you was screaming out for rest but your mind would simply not allow it to.

Your melatonin gummies only afforded you three hours of sleep that night, leaving you pacing about the house like a zombie until the last of it cleared your system. You showered and put on your makeup, carefully ensuring the dark circles were covered. You put on one of their favourite dresses, hoping they wouldn’t notice that it was a little looser on you than before. Or perhaps, like everyone else, they would applaud your new figure.

Setting up the coffee, you held-off starting the brew cycle, waiting for the text to arrive from Bradley that they were on their way home from the base, wanting it to be as fresh as possible. You nearly jumped out of your skin as your phone vibrated with the notification, sliding off your seat at the island and pressing start button before doing one last circuit of the house, unable to sit down.

You were just setting out their favourite mugs on the stone countertop when you heard the engine of Jake’s truck pull into the driveway, rushing to open the front door. Bradley was halfway up the walk when you yanked it open, covering the last of the distance in two long strides before bending his knees to hoist you up into a bone-crushing hug. You squealed as in his excitement, or perhaps his misjudgement of your weight, you shot up higher than expected. Jake laughing brightly as he jogged over, wrapping his arms around both of you tightly as Bradley set your feet back on the concrete walkway.

Nestling your face between their bodies, you inhaled deeply, fingers curling into the fabric of their clothing as you savoured the fact that they were present, they were real, they were alive. Jake shifted back and hooked a finger beneath your chin, coaxing your face up. You smiled at him tremulously, blinking back tears as he leaned in to press his lips to yours firmly. Sighing deeply into the kiss, your fingers sought Bradley’s curls, sinking your fingers into his hair affectionately as he patiently waited his turn, his hands running along your sides, massaging your hip, your butt.

Gasping against Jake’s lips as Rooster’s hand gave a particularly greedy squeeze, you pulled back to press your lips to his, a shiver rolling through your entire body at the feel of his facial hair against your upper lip.

“You wore our favourite dress, pretty girl…” You heard Jake murmur against your shoulder, his fingers toying with the hem. “Mmmm we should get you inside before the neighbours get jealous.”

Reluctantly, you allowed them to pull back and gather their things from the truck, leading them inside.

“That coffee smells amazing…” Jake sighed, setting his bag down at the foot of the stairs.

“Let me grab you a cup.” You nodded and quickly moved into the kitchen, filling Jake’s mug and setting it down to reach for Bradley’s.

In your haste to be of service to them, you had misjudged the edge of the counter, the coffee cup wobbling precipitously before tumbling over to smash on the tile, splashing hot liquid and broken ceramic in all directions.

“Fuck!” The curse flew from your lips, and you quickly set the coffee pot back onto the element before bending down to pick up the sharp shards with your bare hands, thoroughly irritated with the mess you had made of the freshly cleaned floor. Not to mention the fact that you had just destroyed Jake’s favourite mug. “Shit, shit, shit…” You hissed, collecting pieces of crockery in your palm, sniffling in a stubborn attempt to hold back your tears.

A pair of arms wrapped around your waist and hauled you back against a strong, broad chest.

“Careful pretty girl, you’re going to hurt yourself…” Bradley’s gravelly voice filled your ears, and you opened your mouth to protest that you were just fine when an ugly sob tore from your throat.

You slapped your free hand over your mouth, mortified, biting down hard on the inside of your cheek in an attempt to stop any more of those from escaping. You felt Bradley tense behind you and saw one half of the look he shared with Jake reflected on the blonde’s face through the stubborn stream of tears in your eyes.

“Ok pretty girl, it’s ok, just a mug all right?” He drawled, carefully taking the broken shards from your hand and setting them on the counter.

“Why don’t you go upstairs with Jake while I take care of this, and we’ll have coffee in bed hmmm?” Rooster soothed and you managed a nod, not really meeting Jake’s eyes, but you could see the furrow of concern on his brow as he pulled you close, tucking you against his side. He led you up the stairs, hand on the small of your back, and into the ensuite bathroom.

“Let’s get you cleaned up hmmm?”

You sniffled and blinked at his words, glancing at the mirror and wincing at the state of your makeup. You grabbed your toiletries bag, opening it up to find your remover wipes, but before you had a chance to get started, he had set you on the counter between the double sinks, your back pressed against the mirror. One broad hand came to rest on your knee, his thumb rubbing warm, soothing circles on your skin as he pulled out the bottle of melatonin first. Then the painkillers. Followed by the eye drops to help with your dry eyes from the constant crying. These items he lined up on the counter one at a time, his face unreadable. And farther below Lake Ontario Takes in what Lake Erie can send her And the iron boats go as the mariners all know With the gales of November remembered

At last Jake produced the make-up removing wipes and turned to you with a gentle, patient expression as he carefully removed the layers of makeup you had become accustomed to painting on every morning to hide the ravages of the nighttime hours on your face. By the time he had cleaned it all off, your eyelids fluttered open to see Bradley leaning in the doorway quietly watching you.

You had spent more time unclothed with the pair of them than anyone in your life and yet you had never felt so naked in their presence before. You tried to avoid their eyes, to focus on your hands in your lap, but Jake caught your chin with his thumb and forefinger, raising your gaze once more to meet his. There was unconcealed concern there, now, and you watched his adam’s apple bob with a pronounced swallow.

“What’s going on, pretty girl…” He tacked your name onto the end of his question, adding a level of seriousness to the moment that had you squirming slightly and Bradley walking over to lean against the countertop beside you.

It was your turn to swallow painfully, groping for words to express just what the hell was going on, before you let out a huff.

“I’m ruining it…” You slumped back against the mirror in defeat, earning a raised eyebrow from each man. “You’re finally home for the first time in months and I’m ruining it…god I have no idea what I’m doing…” You scrubbed a hand down your tired face, dark circles beneath your eyes laid bare by Jake’s handiwork, and began to gnaw on your thumbnail thoughtfully.

There was another look shared between the pair of them, but this time you could see the concern shared in their gazes. There was an element of knowing something held in that look. Something they weren’t saying aloud. It irked you, made you even more annoyed with yourself for being so broken that you couldn’t even welcome them home properly.

“I’m supposed to be having amazing reunion sex with you both right now to make up for the fact that you’ve been gone, and I can’t stop crying…” you wiped at your face angrily before Jake caught your hand in his, lacing your fingers together and squeezing gently.

“You think we would ignore the fact that you’re not ok just because we want you, pretty girl?” He gently kissed away a fresh tear as it stole down your cheek.

Your eyes flitted over towards Bradley as he brushed away another tear on your opposite cheek with the backs of his fingers, treating you with more kindness than you had shown yourself in weeks.

“Please…what’s going on…” He rasped, voice roughened further by emotion, his brow furrowed.

In a musty old hall in Detroit they prayed In the Maritime Sailors' Cathedral The church bell chimed ‘til it rang twenty-nine times For each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald

You glanced between the pair of them, filled with trepidation, but quite honestly holding back these words had not served you in the least, so perhaps releasing them might at the very least provide some relief.

“My dumb ass has gone and fallen in love with two men with one of the most dangerous jobs in the world and I have no idea what I’m doing…” You exhaled in surrender, eyeing their faces intently to see how they might react as a hurricane of butterflies erupted in your stomach.

There was silence for a moment, and your worried that you had been too cryptic or too forward, until a flicker of hope dawned as smiles began to tug at their lips. You gasped as they both leaned forward at the same time, aiming for the opposite corners of your lips. It was awkward and claustrophobic and yet it felt so incredibly right to share a kiss between the three of you simultaneously. Sliding your arms around their necks, you held them close as they clung to you so tightly you felt as though they might have a decent chance of fusing your broken pieces back together.

“I love you, too.” Bradley whispered against your cheek, making you shiver in delight as Jake murmured your name adoringly.

“Love you both.” He grinned, not to be outdone.

“I’m really…sorry that I’m such a mess, please don’t…blame yourselves I…”

Bradley shook his head firmly.

“But we are to blame. At the very least, partially. We left you alone for the first time by yourself with nothing…pretty girl, will you ever forgive us?”

“Of course I forgive you!” You said quickly, kissing him firmly and wiping at a few of his tears that had slipped from the corners of his eyes.

“You were far too convincing, I promise to be a lot more skeptical in the future.” Jake teased but shook his head, assuming a more serious expression. “You’re our partner and we’re going to do a much better job of this going forward, ok?”

You gave him a watery smile and hauled him in for a firm kiss of agreement. They ushered you into your pajamas and the three of you curled up in bed, Bradley and Jake enjoying their coffee and baked goods with you sandwiched tightly between them as they regaled you with stories of their travels. Warm, safe, and contented, you found your eyelids drooping heavily. Jake’s hand rubbing soothing circles on your back and Bradley’s fingers tracing the features of your face were not making it any easier to stay awake.

“Sleep…” One or both of them whispered, and you made a soft noise of protest but were otherwise helpless against the rising tide of exhaustion.

You awoke to a bedroom painted in the hues of sunset, snuggled tightly into Bradley’s chest, the scent of pizza filling the air.

“That smells good…” You sighed drowsily.

“You hungry, pretty girl?” Jake drawled, the bed dipping and jostling as he walked closer on his knees, carrying pizza boxes over as you slowly sat up, nodding as a jaw-cracking yawn took over your body. “Good, let’s get some meat back on your bones.” The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down Of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee Superior, they said, never gives up her dead When the gales of November come early

With The Three of Us Masterlist

#hangster x reader #top gun angst #reader x rooster x hangman #hangman x reader #rooster x reader #hangman x rooster #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #jake hangman seresin x reader #top gun imagine #top gun maverick fanfiction

[slutsofren]

would you mind writing a little ficlet (or hcs) of the batboys and reader taking care of their newborn?

ever since i read the oneshot where reader goes into labor, i've been going FERAL at the thought of the batboys being loving dads set in the hloc universe🥺🥺

but only if you're comfortable and if you want to!!! you don't have to do this if you don't want to, no hard feelings 💜

OOH THIS IS GOOD

okay so i should start with a blanket message. i, personally, do not have children, i do not know how to raise a child save for a cat who is my pride and joy. i do not wish to have a child in my life. with that being said i will likely get a lot of things (lol everything) wrong in more detailed ways but hey, that's why this is a fantasy fic right lol

as always, details under the cut!! i went for general attitudes towards your pregnancy in the high lady universe but if you want something a wee bit different just shoot on over an ask :> 🤍🌹

**i will not be posting this to ao3 so it is a ✨tumblr exclusive✨

cw: babies, a little bit of violence mentioned but nothing bad :>

Azriel

az was the first one to try and get you pregnant and yes, he was trying multiple times a day for it to take so when the little flutter first happened, he cried. big fat tears.

when the babe was born with dripping black onyx wings az had weeped, they all did

he began to take less spy missions that would keep him away longer than a few hours just to stay home with his child, at least until they would old enough yeah right

it would take him months before he was able to stay a single night away on a mission at which point you had to reassure him with multiple kisses that the two of you would be fine

he cared for you in every single way possible, physically, mentally, emotionally, and would do everything in his power to keep you both happy

you wanted a bath? absolutely, here is your bath but let him take the baby, no it's fine he wanted to hold them :)

there would be nights where the babe would wake and cry and az would jump up and immediately take to them, consoling their cries

you'd watch as az would gently murmur stories from memory, of a high lady who fought to the death for her lovers, stories of you

az always was and always will be the protector of your little family

Cassian

absolute loser of a daddy

he didnt know the first thing of being a dad and he sure as hell did not know how to care for one

all brawn and very little brain for baby 101

he was never sure if he wanted kids when he first met you but seeing you pregnant, seeing his family, he was satisfied with whatever the outcome may be

he once tried to give baby a dagger when they were still a toddler and if you listen closely you could still hear Rhys’ voice shouting “NO” from the mountains of Illyria

for the first few weeks, cass was afraid he was going to drop the baby so he avoided holding them at all costs, leaving it to az and you

it wasnt until you assured him it was going to be fine did he give in, only to immediately start crying when he realized this was his family. he had a family. everything he fought for was for this.

cass was a warrior and he was absolutely going to be the one who trained your babies how to kick ass like him

Rhysand

rhys always was and always will be the most hesitant of the daddies

it took him time to come to terms with your pregnancy only because he lost his first family so violently, he wasn't sure if he was ready for that step but he knew he wanted it with you

rhys was the one who would secretly take the babe under the cover of darkness outside to practice flying as a surprise for you all

knowing the childhood of your other mates, he did everything he could to ensure none of your babies would ever grow up in violence like them or be in want of affection

with that being said, he became much more violent towards members of his court of nightmares.

he was a high lord so he was often not home but he would be damned to let the disease fester and grow under his reign, and he would make sure none of your children would shoulder his burden

to him, rhys did not care if he was biologically the father of any of your babies but he would fight wars for them so they would never have to

#the high lady talks #anon ask #the high lady of cunning #acotar rewrite #rhysand #rhys acotar #rhysand x reader #cassian acotar #cassian x reader #azriel acotar #azriel x reader

[kimbappykidding]

Other parts: Part two.

Jeno was ready for a quiet evening at home. He shared an apartment with Jaemin but he was out for the night so he had the place to himself. To make use of this Jeno ordered a pizza, set up his gaming device in the living room and prepared for many hours of fun. About 2 and a half hours into his tournament the door went. Not the doorbell downstairs but someone knocking on his door and they were doing so frantically. Jeno was confused and a little worried until he looked through the peephole and saw who was standing there. "Y/n?" he asked opening the door.

You were Jaemin's twin sister but as you were born after him he always referred to you as his little sister. Being the same age the two of you were close and Jaemin never shut up talking about you! He loved you a lot and missed you like crazy when you moved away for university. You'd come back 6 months ago and Jaemin was thrilled...Jeno was pretty happy with you being around more too.

Jeno knew you from school. You were never interested in performing arts but went to a girls' school down the road from the school him and Jaemin went to. He obviously knew you as Jaemin's sister and always thought you were really pretty and cool. You were usually surrounded by friends but made sure to say hi to Jaemin and Jeno. Jeno remembered once, he saved the subway train for you when you were running late and you caught it just on time. You thanked him and it was the first time you'd looked at him directly in the eye. He thought you were pretty even back then and always had a crush on you...which apparently hadn't gone away since he'd become an idol.

"Hey" you said "can I come in?". You weren't slurring your words but Jeno could tell you'd been drinking and sensed something was up. "Yeah of course" he said and he noticed as he shut the door and locked it that you visibly relaxed and your usual smile returned. You were naturally a smiley jokey person and Jeno had never seen you genuinely sad or angry. You were also very confident and fun which Jeno of course had noticed. How couldn't he when a pretty girl started showing up and making him laugh and smile?

He'd never really seen you like this before and by that, Jeno meant in a dress. Sure you'd had a crappy skirt as part of your uniform when you were at school but that was years ago. Whenever you came over recently it was to have game tournaments with your brother Jaemin so you usually showed up in trackies and with your hair all scraped away from your face. But tonight you were in a dress and a tight pretty dress at that. Jeno couldn't help but stare as he never realised how toned your body was. You also had your hair and makeup done and just looked so pretty. Not for the first time, he wondered how you and Jaemin were twins. Jeno had always been fond of you but this was something else and he realised he'd never been alone with you before. The silence in the apartment seemed huge and he felt embarrassed just thinking about it.

"Is Jaemin here?" you asked and Jeno shook his head "he's gone out for the night". You sighed as he said that and looked down as if trying to work something out. "Are you okay?" he asked focusing on the matter at hand. You nodded "yeah I'm okay just this creepy guy wouldn't leave me alone and we weren't far from here so I told him I lived here and managed to get away from him and sneak in here just as one of your neighbours was coming out. It was very lucky". "What the fuck?" Jeno asked jumping up "is he still here?". "I don't know, he was knocking on the door downstairs asking me to let him in when I was coming upstairs...". Jeno swore again and grabbed his jumper. "What are you doing?" you asked and he shrugged "what does it look like? I'm going to go put some sense into that guy, harassing girls like that". "No don't!" you said nervously "I don't want him to hurt you". Jeno smiled "you think I'd lose?" Jeno asked, his pride a little hurt. "I don't know" you admitted "but even if he gets one punch on your face your stylist would be pissed" you said. You were a makeup artist for Hybe so it made sense you'd think of this but Jeno liked to think you genuinely didn't want him to get hurt. Jeno smiled again "then I won't let him get a shot on me". You still looked worried and Jeno sighed "fine I won't go" he said and again you visibly relaxed "you won't? Good! We're safe in here and if I just stay a little until he leaves..." when the buzzer went.

You both looked at it and waited for it to end but it just kept ringing. You shook your head "that's probably him". "There's no way that's him!" Jeno said and he pressed the call button. There was a two-way camera but your side was hidden and you were both standing around the doorbell screen when the image flashed up. "That's him" you said and Jeno shook his head and answered the call.

"Can I help you?" he asked in his most intimidating voice. The guy blinked and then with no shame asked "do you have a girl called Y/n up there? She said she way staying here". "yeah she's with me, I'm her boyfriend and why have you followed her home?" he asked. "I've not!" the guy said even though he literally had. "I just wanted to make sure she was safe, is she there? Not that I don't believe you I just want to make sure she's safe". "Yeah she's here" Jeno said and he gestured for you to come to him. You did and Jeno opened his arms. He rested one hand on your waist and pulled you close to his chest. He pressed the camera switch and glared "now you can see she's here, she's safe, she's more than happy so you can leave and if I ever see you near her again you're dead" and Jeno hung up.

You both stayed frozen for a few seconds after the screen went black and then you let out the breath you'd been holding. "Wow thank you" you said looking at Jeno and he shrugged "you're welcome, I'm glad you came here. You can always come here if there's anyone bothering you". You nodded "thanks Jeno" and he smiled "no problem". It was at that moment you both realised you were still standing together and you apologised as your hands were still resting on his chest. "Sorry!" you said "I didn't mean to feel your chest". Jeno chuckled slightly "It's fine, I grabbed you pretty suddenly too". "Yeah but it was nice" you said "I mean because it felt safe. To have your arms around me after being with the creep". Jeno nodded and ignored all the suggestions going around in his head because you were still Jaemin's sister. "No problem, if you ever need any more help with him just text me" he said. "I would but I don't have your number" you said with a smirk and Jeno smiled and gave you his phone "put it in and I'll go find you something to wear". "Wear?" you asked and he nodded "you're not going back out there while stalker Steve is out there. You can sleep in Jaemin's room" and he disappeared into his room.

You put your details into his phone and then wandered into your brother's room. Jeno appeared shortly after with a t-shirt and some shorts. "They might be a little big but I figured they'd do the job" he smiled "feel free to use the bathroom too. Anything on the side is fine and there are brand new toothbrushes under the sink if you want to brush your teeth". "I'm sorry but what boys' apartment has new toothbrushes already there for when you need a new one? Males can plan in advance?" you asked. "The good ones can" Jeno replied purposefully omitting it was Jaemin's idea after that one time they both binned theirs and the store was out of them for a week. You laughed and Jeno could feel your eyes on him as you toyed with the clothes he'd brought you. He wondered why you were watching him until he realised you probably wanted to get changed.

"So can I get you anything else?" he asked and you shook your head "thanks Jeno you've been amazing...definitely the favourite out of my brother's friends". "You mean I wasn't before?" he asked and you shook your head "no but that's only because Jaehyun exists". Jeno paused "oh you're into Jaehyun?". "What girl isn't?" you asked "with those big shoulders and cheekbones he's so sexy...but Jaehyun's never saved me from a stalker before so you definitely jump to first place". Jeno smiled "I'm so honoured. Are there any perks for first place?" before realising how they sounded. "You want a prize?" you asked and Jeno blinked "no I was only joking". You looked him up and down before nodding "hmm shame" and then turned and strode into the bathroom leaving Jeno staring after you.

Jeno's heart was beating rapidly and he didn't get how one word could make him so crazy. Jeno gathered all his things from the living room and retreated to his room. He felt all flustered around you so figured this would be safer. He heard you moving around as much as he tried to ignore it and eventually fell asleep an hour after you'd gone quiet.

The next morning Jeno woke up to hear a soft banging and recalling you were here, he jumped up worrying it was the stalker coming to bother you. He rushed into the kitchen to find you cooking at the stove. You looked super cute in his shorts and he stared at you from behind for a few seconds before he spoke "Y/n?" he called "what are you doing?". "Jeno!" you said happily and spun around to face him before pausing and it was then that Jeno realised he was topless. He slept shirtless and forgot to grab a shirt in his rush to make sure you were okay. He felt a blush form on his cheeks as you looked over him before smiling. You turned around as he rushed to get a shirt but as he went he heard you say "yeah Jaehyun who?" and that comment really made him happy.

Jeno returned fully clothed and tried this again. "Why are you cooking?" he asked. "I thought I'd make you breakfast as a thank you for rescuing me" you said and Jeno shook his head "you don't have to do that...but out of interest what did you make?" because it smelled really good. You smiled "go take a seat I'll bring it through now. You have perfect timing apparently".

You gestured to the balcony and Jeno saw you'd set the table casually but it was still way nicer than when he and Jaemin ever did. You appeared a minute later with two plates and passed Jeno one "here, from looking in your fridge I guessed you're a bacon fan?" you asked. You knew your brother didn't like it much so deduced the huge amount of bacon in there belonged to Jeno and were correct. "Very much so" Jeno said and looked anxiously at the bacon to see how you'd cooked it but was pleasantly surprised. "I like it this way too" you smiled seeing his expression and tumbled into the chair next to him. Jeno smiled to see your plate just as full as his and he couldn't help but admire how strong you looked. You clearly didn't subscribe to the idea women had to be super thin and fragile and he thought you looked glorious...so much so he actually forgot about his bacon and you had to remind him. "Well go on don't leave me in suspense, take a bite" you said and Jeno nodded "right" and took a big mouthful. You were staring at him, wide-eyed, and Jeno quickly swallowed and nodded "it's good" and you smiled pleased. The food actually was good but Jeno would've easily lied and eaten the whole thing because your smile was incredibly charming.

Jeno very much enjoyed his breakfast/time with you one-on-one and found it easier to talk to you by the end of it. He liked how there was still tension between the two of you but he could also talk to you and learned more about you. He'd always wanted to ask you questions but he never dared approach you when Jaemin was around and so you'd remained an elusive figure until now. He thought past schoolboy Jeno would be stunned to see future him sitting chatting to you and even managing to flirt a little. It was progress indeed.

After breakfast, the two of you did the washing and drying together and were just finishing up when the door opened and Jaemin entered. "Y/n!" he said seeing you and then he spotted you were in Jeno's clothes and paused. You could see the misunderstanding forming in Jaemin's eyes and decided to nip it in the bud. "So last night I had this stalker and Jeno got rid of him and let me stay over. How sweet is he?" you asked. Jaemin immediately relaxed and smiled at his friend "thanks Jeno and Y/n are you okay?". You nodded and explained things to Jaemin who was just as furious as Jeno. The two were debating how best to get the security footage to share with police and came up with multiple plans which made you smile.

You had to leave soon to get ready for work and Jaemin insisted on driving you home. After he'd arrived he'd steamrolled the conversation and your attention was on your brother. So Jeno retreated to his room after saying goodbye and was starting to plan his day when there was a knock at his door.

"Hey" you said appearing "I just wanted to tell you I'll take the clothes home and wash them so I haven't stolen them I'm just cleaning them". "You don't have to do that" Jeno rushed to say "I can do that, plus it's not like you're dirty or something". You smiled "I know but I figured I could drop them off sometime later in the week...it'd given me an excuse to come back and visit you" you said "unless you don't want that?". Jeno swallowed because you were definitely flirting with him! He heard Jaemin call your name asking if you were ready to go and you smiled "want me to leave them or take them?" you asked. "You can take them" Jeno said and your smile made his day.

Later that day at work Jeno still wasn't over what had happened and when Jaemin left he told the guys (minus Jaemin) everything. "It was weird" Jeno admitted "Y/n came over because she was having some problems but that's not the point. Things were supercharged between us and she was so flirty with me!". Jeno expected the guys to gasp at the idea of Jeno flirting with you but they didn't. "Oh yeah Y/n's flirted with me before" Mark said and some of the other guys said you had with which bothered Jeno. Not because he thought you had but because the guys didn't seem to get this was different. "Yeah she's a jokey person but this was more than that, she was so full on". "Yeah Y/n's like that" Haechan said and Jeno's frustration worsened as Mark began telling the story of the time he commented you looked good in red and now anytime you wore a red outfit you'd make a beeline for him. Jeno didn't like how Mark clearly thought you were into him and even though he'd only had one moment with you, he needed the guys to understand whatever they thought had happened was meaningless compared to his moment with you.

"No you don't get it this was beyond flirting this was really... physical" Jeno said "We were pressed up together and she didn't move away until she felt she had to and then the next morning when she saw me topless she totally checked me out. I think she wanted me!". The guys all looked at him and then Haechan started laughing "yeah right!". "Yeah are you sure this wasn't a dream you had about her?" Chenle asked. "Of course it wasn't a dream it really happened!" Jeno said. The guys however just kept teasing him and then when Jaemin appeared let the topic drop without any protest.

The guys all clearly thought this wasn't a big deal at all but Jeno couldn't drop it. He tried not to think about it because it was only one occasion but he couldn't help but pause every time Jaemin's phone went and kept asking Jaemin about his plans hoping they'd involve you. Slowly it did get slightly better...he stopped thinking about you as much and that's of course when you re-appeared.

Jeno was on tenterhooks wondering when you'd come over but finally, you texted him one day asking if you could meet him after work one day to give him his clothes back. Jeno immediately scrambled to work out a day that was best for you and suggested Friday which actually worked perfectly. You agreed to meet him in a cafe around the corner from his work and Jeno was nervous all day. He didn't tell Jaemin in case he thought it was weird or asked to come. He didn't tell the guys because he worried they'd tell Jaemin so he sweat in silence.

Of course to make things worse rehearsal overran and Jeno was stressed! They weren't allowed phones so he couldn't text you and he was so worried you'd think he'd stood you out. He took off running the second rehearsal was over and texted you he was on his way. He reached the cafe still out of breath and was relieved to see you still sat there. He rushed over to you and you looked up as he got close. "Y/n I'm so sorry I'm late, thank you for waiting. Rehearsal overran and I couldn't message you, I'm really so sorry". You smiled "Jeno it's fine, I figured that's where you were so I'm not mad. I get you can't just drop what you're doing when you're done. You didn't need to panic, I wasn't going to storm off if you were a little late. I know you're a nice guy and weren't blowing me off". "Oh..." Jeno said feeling surprised "thank you". You smiled "you're welcome, now do you need a drink? You look like you just ran here" and you paused when you saw Jeno's face "you ran here?". "I didn't want to keep you waiting" he shrugged and you smiled "well relax now, sit down and I'll go get you a drink". "Wait no let me pay for it" Jeno said but you just pushed him back into his chair "no, you need to get your blood pressure back to a normal level" and you walked away not giving Jeno time to argue. He watched you go and put his hands in his lap.

You placed a cold drink in front of Jeno minutes later and then took a seat across from him "so how has your day been? Apart from the last-minute stressing?". "It's been busy but good" Jeno said "we've been learning the choreography and that's my favourite part of any song". You smiled recalling he was a really good dancer "yeah that makes sense, you always were a really talented dancer". Jeno blushed "have you ever seen me dance?" and you paused. "I've seen you in music videos Jaemin showed me" you said "but never in person no. Why are you inviting me to your next rehearsal?". Jeno went pink at the thought and explained rehearsals weren't allowed guests. "Okay so a private performance then?" you asked and Jeno went even pinker so you smiled and told him you were joking. "Don't worry, I'm sure I'll see you dance live at one of your concerts someday". Jeno nodded "yeah we can get you tickets anytime you want to come along so just let me know". You nodded "I will do" and Jeno calmed down enough to return the question "so how's your day been?" You chatted more and Jeno fought out a lot more about your job. It was weird hearing you talk about Seventeen and it made him a little nervous to think you were around guys like Mingyu and Jun all day but you didn't seem interested in them like that...or so he hoped. You ended up staying in the cafe for a few hours and Jeno didn't even realise it had gone dark outside. He insisted on driving you home after last time and led you back into work where he'd left his car. On the way inside who called out to him but Jaehyun?

Jeno cursed because he really didn't want to have to introduce you but there was no avoiding it as Jaehyun called out his name. "Jeno? I thought that was you, what are you still doing here?" Jaehyun asked. "Oh I went out after work and I'm just coming back for my car" Jeno explained and Jaehyun nodded and looked at you. "Hi" he smiled "I'm Jaehyun, I work with Jeno". You smiled "nice to meet you I'm Y/n, I'm a fan of your music". Jeahyun smiled "thank you that's really sweet to hear. Are you an idol too?" he asked unsure as he looked at you and Jeno didn't blame him. You were a stylist and definitely cool enough to be one. You shook your head but seemed pleased with the compliment "no I work for Hybe, I'm a makeup artist". "Ahh that explains it" Jaehyun said and your smile grew. Jeno felt very awkward and wasn't sure what to do to stop you and Jaehyun. He was sure this was his shot with you over but then you spoke. "Yeah I thought of applying here but none of you guys seem to need makeup at all. I saw Jeno without it the other morning and had to do a double-take he looked so good. You all just have perfect faces or something". Jaehyun smiled "well I can personally testify I don't but yeah Jeno does". Jeno blushed as you both looked at him and tried to say he didn't but you didn't let him.

After teasing him for a bit, you went your separate ways and Jeno led you to his car. Jeno's heart was still beating rapidly from your compliment and the implication you'd seen him without makeup in the morning. It was like you were leading Jaehyun to believe the two of you were a thing. Jeno felt better for the interaction now and the smile Jaehyun shot him as you walked away made him confident Jaehyun thought you were together and Jeno liked that thought.

He liked it very much.

"Today was fun" you said in the car and Jeno nodded "yeah it really was!". "Maybe we should hang out again?" you asked and Jeno's throat went dry at the thought but he must've looked okay with the idea because you kept going. "You're into gaming right? Maybe we could hang out and do that sometime?" you asked unbuckling your seatbelt as you reached your house. Jeno nodded "I'd love that!" and you smiled. "Great, I'll text you" and you hopped out of the car. "Bye Jeno!" and with a gorgeous smile you walked away.

Jeno felt like all his high school dreams were coming true and he couldn't wait for what the upcoming week would bring.

He knew if you were there, he'd be happy.

That's part 1 of my first Jeno series! I discovered NCT-Dream quite late but liked Jeno from the start. I think he's stunning and like his tough but shy personality.

This will be a four-part series and I will link other parts at the top of this page.

#jeno #jeno fic #jeno imagine #jeno x reader #jeno x female reader #jeno nct #nct jeno #nct dream jeno #jeno nct dream #nct dream #nct dream fic #nct dream imagine #nct dream x reader #nct dream x female reader #nct dream x y/n #nct dream x you #jeno x you #jeno x y/n #nct jeno fic #nct jeno imagine #nct jeno x reader #nct dream jeno fic #nct dream jeno imagine #nct jeno x you #nct jeno x y/n #jeamin #jaemin and jeno #kpop #kpop fic #kpop imahine

[whereisten]

Valentine Boy

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 (Final)

Special Cover Art by @nakayutasama &lt;3

Summary:

You've been dating College Student! Jaehyun for a few months now. He's unbelievably sweet, smart, oh..and very handsome. Best of all, he gives you the best love you've ever had. He's the love of your life and you can't see anything going wrong as your relationship sails smoothly.that is….until you discover his biggest secret. He's been hiding the fact that he's a camboy and you start to wonder..ls Jaehyun as sweet and honest as you think he is?

Pairing: female reader X college student and camboy!Jaehyun

Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff

Chapter Word Count: 13.5K

Warnings: cursing, cheating, cam boy (video-recorded sex with online audience), brief sexual assault mention (nothing detailed), deception, manipulation, blackmail, alcohol use, minor character death, descriptive smut (fingering, dirty talk, BDSM themes (toy usage, spanking), oral sex (m receiving), threesome, some masturbation, rough sex, vaginal penetration, anal sex, breast fondling).

(A/N): HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!!!💗💗 Jfc I cannot believe this took 3 years 😵‍💫 please PLEASEEEE forgive me for completely abandoning this as well as other fics, things happen and I couldn’t find any motivation to write for a while. It’s slowly starting to come back, so you’ll notice my writing style is rusty, please be patient with me❤️Anyway, I’ve introduced a new character *hint hint* his name starts with T hehe! Thank you guys so much for reading this series!! I really want to know if you love Cam Boy! Jaehyun or can’t stand him after this finale. So please comment or send an ask! I hope you enjoy! low key, I’m relieved but I’m also kinda sad, anytime I finish a series it’s really like closing a book and leaving the characters behind, it’s weird.. nonetheless!! ENJOY!

Tag List (if you’re still here, I’d be VERY impressed😭): @teddybella @nakayutasama @nainjun @moonflower-98 @cherrym4rk @hwangjinkkami @jeongyoonohs @starlightdustspots @80sjaeden-blog @poisonedsultana @breadjaehyunie @lilaewe @hash-brownsss @lazydepkkst @greatbakerypaperoperator @mymy127 @tiramisubox @cactus-rocks @justineasian @nakamotonikkoru @joyfulghosteagletree @nainjun @bluehippoo @suhtements @lonely-moon-in-the-sky @ratchet-sebooty @mrshatakekakashi-blog @painted-hills @haylo4ever @celestiababie @ubbesson @tinybangtanstan @oddeyecirca @hongtyong @johnnysmybabydaddy @yesitsmeavi @polarlight-b @chanyeolscoon @ncteaxhoe @suhweo @jiyoungiejae @suhfluffy @the-universe-in-you-jjh @yutyongie @isolemnlyswearimgood @staywritten @hnvbin @jhhooppppeeee @yunohflwr @gotoartistprofile @shiningstarsarah @glitterfall @minsik-k @yoooori @26zcl @ahtisa02 @wonw00t

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[2:30 PM]

“Miss y/n, I understand that you believe you’re innocent in this situation, but the fact of the matter is that these scandalous photos WERE taken with your permission. You voluntarily posed for these photos”

The Dean flips the posters over on his desk so that he doesn’t have to look at them anymore. You appreciated it, but really, you wished she’d be more sympathetic.

“Y-yes, but not with the belief that they’d ever leave my boyfriend's computer..I’m sorry, I don’t know who is trying to blackmail me, but I’d really appreciate it if campus police could do an investigation. I think my boyfriend was hacked.”

You say quietly, unsure of whether or not you even believed that.

“Of course, miss Y/n, this will be done and the perpetrator may be convicted of sexual assault, should there be enough evidence and should you wish to press charges, but right now, our main concern is maintaining our campus peace and the respectful treatment of others that we pride ourselves in having.”

You nod.

“That being said…” she sighs.

“Myself, as well as your professors, have decided to forbid you from entering the campus.”

Your mouth falls open as your eyes widen. “Wha-“

“It’ll only be for the remainder of the semester. You can join us again in the Fall, but in the meantime, you must finish your classes online at home.”

Your eyes start to fill with tears.

“But it isn’t my fault, I-I don’t understand.”

“Things have to calm down right now, you’ll also be at risk for even more harassment if you stay.” She stands and fixes her blazer, signaling that the conversation was over.

You nod and stand up. She was right. You were in a vulnerable state right now. People that hadn’t known you before now knew what your body looked like without your consent. They’d have perceptions about you, they’d look at you scornfully or maybe even make advances. 

“Thank you for your time.” You hold your head down and leave the office.

————

Back in your apartment, Bella and Jackson talk about how they ran Jaehyun away. He came to look for you, but they told him they’d have him arrested for trespassing.

“He and the fucking bitch Reina deserve to suffer! I swear to God I will ruin them!” Bella stomps through the apartment.

You hold your face in your hands and sob while thinking about what your life has turned into. You couldn’t show your face on campus now and it’s all because you decided to trust Jaehyun.

“I know what I’ll do, I’ll hack into their account and fucking delete it, how dare they make money after this!”

Bella continues. “They’ll have to start all over.”

“Bella..please..that won’t do anything right now.” You cry even harder. You knew she cared for you and hated seeing you like this, but her getting revenge really didn’t make you happier.

Bella stops in her tracks, rushing to sit beside you and hold your back.

“I’m..sorry, I’m so wounded up, I didn’t even remember that your health is a priority right now. You don’t deserve this and you didn’t do anything wrong, people are just assholes. Have you eaten?”

You shake your head.

“I’ll grab something for you, okay? Stay right here, I’ll be right back!”

While waiting, you hesitantly unlock your phone to check your notifications.

You had nearly 100 missed calls and texts from Jaehyun. You ignore them and block him. You aren’t sure what to think at this point, and it’s not like Jaehyun hasn’t deceived you before. You refuse to be taken for a fool any longer.

You open up the college social media app, CamPak, an app that allows only students on campus to connect with each other anonymously. It’s like Twitter, but for college students whose IP addresses fit the location of the college. You know you probably shouldn’t, but curiosity eats away at you in the silence of your apartment now.

You sigh and scroll through the posts.

Did anyone see those posters this morning? Is this a new nsfw club kkkkk sign me up

She’s hot!! Put the flyers back up

Poor girl must be so embarrassed

Why? She’s the one that posted them obvi, she wants attention

Nah that’s revenge porn

I’d show her a good time

Whoever posted these is a HOE

We don’t need to see this..let it stay on OnlyCams girl

The posts could’ve been worse, you think to yourself and put your phone down. You still feel embarrassed and know you need to be away from it all.

———

[Two Days Later]

“Hey, mom” you drop your duffel bag to the floor and pull your mom into the biggest hug.

“Oh! You’re home early, I thought you had about another month or so?”

You sob quietly, but not because you’re sad, but because it felt good to have someone hold you so lovingly. You’re relieved to be away from it all, and although it sucks having to switch to online classes so late, you prefer working from your home with only your mom around you.

“Yeah..well, I decided to leave early and finish up my classes from home.”

She pulls away to look at you, a frown coming across her face when she sees your swollen, red eyes.

“Wait, what’s wrong?”

You hesitate to tell her the truth, how could you explain that you were the one that allowed the photos to be taken in the first place? The last thing you needed was for her to scold you for not protecting yourself.

“Nothing…it’s just been a difficult semester, I’m glad to be home now.” You give her a small smile.

“If something was wrong, you’d tell me, right?” Her eyes plead for an answer.

You nod. “Of course.”

You don’t need to relive your embarrassment by showing her the pictures and explaining everything, it’s all going to be okay now.

———

[Two Weeks Later]

You focus on your studies and get your work done online as expected. Bella tells you that students stopped talking about what happened a few days after you left. Luckily, social media and preparation for exams kept them busy enough to forget about it.

You breathe a sigh of relief when you finally feel like things are going back to normal, slowly, but surely. 

However, you still cry yourself to sleep on some nights. You miss Jaehyun and wonder what you did to deserve this treatment from him. All you did was love him with your entire heart. He took that for granted by risking your privacy and pulling you into a game you had no understanding of.

You never think of texting as this distance is necessary, but you didn’t know that he was keeping in contact with your mother. 

She loves him so much, thinking that he is incredibly charming and thereby, perfect for you. She thinks of him as her son already. So when he shows up to her house one day, she doesn’t hesitate to let him in.

“Honey!” She calls out to you as you wrap up a final paper while sitting at your desk in your room.

“Yes! I’m almost done.”

She still opens the door and peaks her head in.

“Jaehyun’s here. He says he couldn’t get you on your phone, so I told him you’ve been studying h-“

“What?!” You turn to look at her with wide eyes, your fingers begin to tremble over the keys of your laptop.

A week later, you’re finally starting to heal, and here he comes to ruin it all, to remind you of everything that went wrong.

Your mom’s brows furrow. “What’s wrong? Did you guys have a fight?”

“No..no, it’s fine.” You know how much Jaehyun means to her, but now is not the time to explain everything that’s happened. 

“Oh..ok. I’ll tell him to come up then.”

You fix your hair and put on lip balm to look somewhat decent while wearing a hoodie and sweatpants.

It doesn’t matter what you look like, but you don’t want him thinking your life has fallen apart completely.

He knocks and waits for you to answer.

“Y/n..”

You clear your throat. “Come in.” 

He pushes the door, stepping in quietly.

He wears a black hoodie over sweatpants too, but his hair is disheveled. He has a faint mustache and beard under his dark eye bags. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days.

“What are you doing here?” You find it hard to look into his tired eyes so you look to the floor.

He closes the door behind him and steps towards you quickly, raising his hand to caress your face.

“Y/n..I’m so sorry, please forgive me..I-“

You step back away from him, bumping into your desk before gripping the edge hard. You feel the blood start to leave your knuckles.

“Get out..I don’t want to see you..” your eyes start to fill with tears as you speak weakly.

“Y/n..baby, it wasn’t me, and I swear to you I will get Reina back for this. She’s ruined you, she’s ruined us.”

“Us?” Your eyes flicker up to him.

“Stop acting like this is as difficult for you as it is for me, you’re not the one whose nudes were plastered all over campus and parts of the internet without consent. If you really cared about me, you would’ve done something already.”

Jaehyun’s hand goes to his side as his face falls. He shakes his head. “I’m sorry, I was a fool..please let me make this right.”

He leans in again, and you flinch as if scared of him for some reason.

He stares in confusion. You don’t want him to touch you anymore.

“Jaehyun…you can make this right by leaving. Don’t contact me or my mom again..” you start to cry and turn your back to him.

“It wasn’t me, I was hacked, you have to believe me!” He starts to cry as well. “I’d never do this to you.”

But the fact of the matter is he already did. He betrayed you by getting this job with Reina in the first place.

”You’re pathetic for trying to claim innocence right now. You know what’s funny, Jaehyun? I would’ve never known of Reina had it not been for you..”

He swallows hard and steps back.

You turn to face him. “If you hadn’t lied..if you hadn’t been greedy..If you weren’t the coward that you are.”

You’re almost unrecognizable as Jaehyun sees the rage in your eyes.

”Get. out.” You say firmly with tears streaming down steadily.

Whether or not Jaehyun released the pictures and posted them online, he was still the one that took them, he had possession. It would be hard to prove his innocence, not only to you, but to the world as well.

He knows this, but he doesn’t care. He just wants to love you again.

He turns to leave, but stops at the door. “I don’t blame you for being upset with me..but I will always love you, regardless of what happens.”

You exhale before falling onto your bed and wrapping yourself in your blankets. Your heart still aches for him, it hurts to be so cruel.

———

[Later That Day]

A plastered drunk Jaehyun slams the counter at the bar.

“Another shot!”

“Ooo..don’t you think you should slow down a bit?”

Reina sneaks up behind him while rubbing his back.

“Fuck..” he puts his head in his hands. She’s the last person he wants to see.

“You’re always so happy to see me, makes me feel loved.” She says sarcastically while sitting on the stool next to him.

“You’re..such a bitch..” he slurs out.

“But you love it, don’t you?” She pouts and places her fingers on his chin to tilt his face towards her. “If it makes you feel better, I do like the scruffy look.”

He pushes her hand away and stands up, he drunkenly stumbles through the crowd to get away from her, but she wraps an arm around his waist and helps him to the back. She pushes him against a wall and leans in close.

“Come on, Valentine Boy, it’s just you and me now, we can do whatever we want. We can make so much money again, what do you say?”

Jaehyun chuckles. “Reina..even enhancement pills won’t get me hard for you again.”

 He was done with her and completely disgusted after all she’d done to hurt you.

Reina’s fall smiles. “You don’t mean that..”

She tries to kiss him, but even in his drunken state, he’s able to push her way.

“Get off of me!”

She still doesn’t stop. “Look at me, Jaehyun, don’t I remind you of her? Treat me like you would treat her if she comes crawling back. You’d love to make love to her, wouldn’t you?”

She kisses his neck while holding his face in her hand. And for a brief moment, Jaehyun does imagine it’s you kissing him. Then, he has flashbacks of your heartbroken and angry face watching him leave. He’d never forget it, because it had been burned into his heart.

“You’re not her! You’ll never be her!” He brushes her off again, but in a fit of rage at his declination, Reina throws herself to the floor to make it seem as though he pushed her.

A ruckus is caused as men storm over to Jaehyun. “What the hell was that?!” They push him into the wall before he can explain.

“He hurt me!” Reina pretends to cry.

Jaehyun said no to her again, and this was unforgivable. She made her feel pain, so it’s only right that she does the same.

“Is he bothering you?” One of the men asks.

“Yes.” She sobs and stands up slowly.

The men take turns kicking Jaehyun down on the ground, making him spit up blood and groan. They pick him up and throw him outside of the bar and onto the street.

Eyes black and blue, stomach filled with bruises, and arms sore, but Jaehyun was convinced that he still didn’t feel as bad as you did. If this was his way to receive pain for what he did, then he’d gladly take it.

Reina hasn’t given up on him just yet, so she devises a plan. She bends over Jaehyun and chuckles. “You should’ve just said yes, Valentine Boy.”

She takes his phone out of his pocket and looks for your number. When she finds it, she puts it into her phone and heads home, leaving Jaehyun to groan in pain and roll around on the dirty pavement.

She calls you up and to her surprise, you actually answer.

You aren’t sure if it’s a professor trying to reach you about one of your finals so you answer just in case.

“Y/n..it’s me, Reina..I’m so sorry.”

You roll your eyes. “I should choke you for what you did.”

“I know..it seems like I’m the one that did this..” Reina starts to cry and sniffles over the line. “But it’s not true..I want to explain everything, I want to help you.”

And for some reason, you listen to her, you trust her. Jaehyun had proven he’s a liar before, but you wanted to hear Reina’s side of the story. So you listened and decided for yourself what you needed to do.

—————

[Three Days Later]

Your thumb hovers over the [send text] button on your phone. Did you really want this? Were you ready?

You take a deep breath and hit send.

You to Jaehyun: let’s meet

You put your phone face down on your desk right away and look to the floor, but just a few seconds later you hear a notification.

Jaehyun to You: yes, I can pick you up now if you’d like

You to Jaehyun: ok

You finally style your hair and put makeup on. You hadn’t felt like yourself since everything happened. You felt ashamed for some reason and a part of you felt that you didn’t deserve to feel pretty. All that changes tonight, however, you’re going to get your life back.

Within an hour Jaehyun arrives at your mom’s place to pick you up.

His eyes grow large at the sight of you in a flowy dress that compliments your body so well.

He hurriedly opens the passenger door and smiles.

“You look amazing.”

“Thanks..you look..better.” You give a small smile and sit inside his car. He cut his hair and shaved his beard and mustache. His eyes still look tired though. 

You look at the side of his face and observe all the features you missed. The way his slender neck looks in white crew neck shirts and how his sturdy pecs often peaked through if the collar was stretched. His arms looked toned, his veiny hands gripped the wheel hard. It all reminded you of the many nights you spent together with him pinning you down and making the best love to you.

Is this all that you missed him for though? Is it just lust, is it truly love? You question everything as you sit next to the man you once swore you would grow old with.

The air is tense during the drive to his place, neither of you want to be the first to say what’s on your mind.

“Are you…almost finished with your exams?”

Jaehyun breaks the silence.

“Y-yeah..I have one more. You?”

“I’m done, had my last one this morning.”

He nods and focuses on the road.

“That’s good” you look outside the window.

More time passes between you, creating an awkward space that you just have to break.

“I…forgive you, Jaehyun.”

He hits the brake a little too hard, causing the car to jerk you both forward in your seats. He turns to you now that you’re parked right outside his apartment.

“I-I’m so sorry, y/n…thank you, I promise to make it up to you and find those assholes. I was hacked and the techs at the library were able to wipe my hard drive so it never happens again.”

Did he wipe it to hide something or did he really get hacked? You thought to yourself.

You nod, desperately trying to hide your skepticism.

He leans in close, caressing the side of your face like you’re a precious jewel. “I love you..so much, you mean the world to me..and I’m sorry this happened to you.”

You place your hand over his, keeping his stare, but finding it hard to feel the love for him that you once felt in your heart.

“I know…let’s put it behind us..I just..want to spend time with you.” You start to tear up. You wish things to go back to how they used to be, but deep down you know that isn’t possible. He’s broken your trust more than once now, and you’re finding it hard to put the pieces back together.

Jaehyun, however, is ready for a third chance, his heart racing at the thought of you being his again. He’s going to do everything in his power to keep you this time.

“You mean everything to me.” His eyes fill with tears and it breaks your heart. You can’t help but feel sad when you see him like this. Despite all he’s put you through, it still hurt.

“I know..don’t cry, I’m right here..I’ll always be here.” You wipe his tears away before kissing him.

Your lips stay together for a few seconds before you pull away.

“Come on..let’s go inside.” You tilt your head towards his door.

As soon as you get inside, you resume your kiss while peeling your clothes off of each other, but stop when you feel movement around your ankles.

You pull away from Jaehyun’s lips and look down. “Wh-what’s that?”

“Oh!” He chuckles and bends down to pick up the gorgeous white and brown dog with huge ears. “This is Dora, I got her for you..for us, before everything went down..”He says softly as Dora sniffs your face.

You take her from him, your eyes welling with tears in the process.

“She’s..so precious, Jay.”

His eyes follow your soft face and he thinks of how much he missed you and hearing you call him that.

Your heart kept breaking that night, an overwhelming amount of emotions flowed through you. 

Why is he doing this to you? Why is he making you fall in love with him all over again?

You sniffle and place her back down.

“She’s perfect…thank you.”

You take his face in your hands and resume kissing him.

He drags the zipper of your dress down with one hand behind you, then overtakes your tongue with his, gaining a quiet moan from your body. 

The way he did things with such skill always turned you on.

Your dress falls to the floor, bunching up around your feet. You step out of it and bump into his kitchen counter while your lips are still attached.

When you open your eyes to unbutton his jeans you see bruises all along his midsection.

“Jay…what-what happened to you?” You pant.

“Oh..it’s nothing.” He tries to go back to kissing you, but you pull away.

“No..it definitely looks like something to me. No more secrets.” You look into his eyes.

“I-it’s stupid, I don’t want to talk about it right now..”

“Well..I do.”

Jaehyun sighs and looks to the ceiling. “Reina tried to get back with me and I told her no…she got a couple guys to beat me up.”

Your mouth falls. “What? Why would she—“

“Because she’s delusional..now kiss me before I go crazy.”

You smirk and raise an eyebrow. “Why should I kiss a guy that can’t win a fight?”

He sticks his tongue in his cheek and chuckles while stepping back. “Touché”

“I’m just joking, come here..”

“Nah..I’m good.” He walks to his room.

You run after him. “Okay I’m sorry, let’s forget about-“

He turns around and grabs you by the waist, swiftly bringing you onto his bed.

He kisses you harshly, biting your lip. He shows off his multitasking skills once again by taking your bra off for you as you hover over him.

Once off, he lets your lips go and smiles. His dimples and soft crescent-shaped eyes make your heart weak. He holds your arms while nuzzling his face into your neck. You giggle at how ticklish it feels.

He then flips you over onto your back and looks into your eyes.

You feel goofy as you smile up at him.

“I missed you so much, baby” he whispers while searching your eyes.

“I missed you too..”

“Oh yeah?” He raises an eyebrow.

You nod and bring your bottom lip between your teeth.

He leans back on his knees and licks his lips.

“Did you touch yourself when you missed me?”

You nod again.

“Sweetheart, let me hear your pretty voice..” he says lowly.

Your chest rises and falls rapidly as he looks down at you with lustful eyes.

��Yes..I did.”

“Naughty girl, you know your fingers can’t replace me, right?” His eyes fall from your exposed chest to the waistband of your panties.

“I know..but they still feel good.”

“Hmm, show me.” He demands.

You take your panties off and throw them to the side, then begin to finger yourself with Jaehyun watching intently.

He brings his jeans and underwear to the middle of his thigh before cupping a fist around his hard member.

You watch him move it up and down slowly and at the same tempo at which you tease your entrance to build your own arousal.

When you put two fingers in you moan and throw your head back.

“That’s it, baby. Fuck..you’re so wet already”

“Only for you, Jay..” you whimper and close your eyes tightly while thinking about the times when Jaehyun had you reeling from his thrusts.

He nearly cums from hearing your breathy words.

You move your fingers in and out of your silky walls, pushing in deeper and deeper. You find that fleshy spot and massage the tips of your fingers against it, just barely applying pressure.

Jaehyun pumps his cock up and down as well, nearly drooling from the sight of your essence-covered fingers entering you over and over.

“Fuck..I’m gonna fun, baby.” You move your fingers faster, but Jaehyun quickly grabs your wrist, placing your dripping fingers into his mouth to suck them clean.

“So good..you taste so good..”

He kisses your neck while aligning his cock with you. Your hands massage his back as you call out his name. 

“Jay..it’s been so long baby, I need you.”

He teases you for a bit, running the tip just along the slit.

“I know..” he groans into your neck and finally pushes into you all the way. You gasp, your nails dig into his back.

No matter how much you prepped yourself for him, he always felt big. 

He thrusts into you slowly, ensuring that you feel every vein while adjusting to him.

You mewl as your head spins. It feels so good to have him on you after all this time. For a moment, you forget about everything that's happened.

“Ahhh pretty baby, God you’re so tight.”

He kisses your neck and thrusts harder.

“All for me, right? I just have to stuff you well. You can handle it, right?”

You moan. “Yes! Harder, please!”

And Jaehyun listens, pounding you into the bed over and over to hear your scream louder. 

He places both legs over his shoulders, grasping your ankles as he fits himself into your body at a different angle.

Your mouth falls open as you call out his name again.

It doesn’t take long for you to quiver around him, cumming hard while your eyes roll to the back of your head. He moves a few more times then cums too, coating your walls with so much, you’re sure that some will leak out.

“Better than your fingers.” He smirks and falls down onto the bed beside you.

You chuckle and lay on his chest.

“I think I need another shower.”

———

[One Week Later]

For Jaehyun, everything went back to normal. You love him and he loves you, you both take care of your darling Dora together. You go on dates and talk about life  as you always do. You make love and spend time cuddling together whenever you’re at his place.

For you, however, it feels different. Jaehyun was the love of your life, but he kept hurting you and you felt the scars on your heart hesitating to heal. You try your best to smile and act as if you don’t suspect him. Your brain tells you everything is okay, but your heart is saying something else.

In the end, would this hurt you or him more?

“Hey. What do you think of this one?” Jaehyun breaks you out of your thoughts as you stare across the vast land of the vineyard.

You’re on a vineyard tour together and get the pleasure of trying different wines.

He hands you a small cup to take a drink out of.

You drink it and close your eyes for dramatic effect. “Oooo..” you exhale. “Nice.”

Jaehyun smiles widely. “I like that one too. Come on, let's grab a bottle.”

“Whoa whoa there, we just started the tour..” you laugh. “What if there are others we like?”

He steps closer to you, gazing down into your wide eyes. “I’ll buy every single one you like.”

You look away and scoff. “You’re so cheesy.”

He chuckles before taking your hand in his and kissing it.  “Only for you.”

The day goes by and you finally get to Jaehyun’s place.

You make out by his front door as you say goodbye.

“You sure you don’t wanna stay over?” He says in between kisses. He rubs his hand along your back.

“I’d love to..trust me, but I have something to take care of.”

You smile back.

“Oh..ok, do you need me to drive you?”

“No, I got it!” You say quickly while stepping back.

“Oh. Well, I’ll see you later then.” He smile before waving you off. “Call me when you get home, okay?”

“Okay!” You yell over your shoulder then walk swiftly out of his sight.

Jaehyun felt something was off about the way you said bye just now, but he shrugs his shoulders and heads inside to Dora.

“Just me and you now, girl.” He bends down and kisses the top of her head.

Meanwhile, once far away, you look back to make sure Jaehyun’s door is shut and he is inside. You then call an Uber.

The Uber drops you off at a place you never thought you’d be at again.

Reina’s apartment.

——————

[One Week Later]

You and Jaehyun have dinner and a Netflix movie date. The food was fantastic and you truly enjoyed your time with Jaehyun. It was romantic and reminded you of the old days.

 Something about him at night with his sharp facial features illuminated by candle lights made him irresistible.

Your dress suddenly felt tighter as he gazed into your eyes while holding your hand.

“Should we go now?” He asks smoothly as if hearing your thoughts about how badly you wished he’d rail you across the table right then and there.

“Sure.”

While on your way to his place, you receive a text.

You’re coming over tonight, right?

A big bidder messaged me saying he’ll be there

Remember you get half

You quickly closed your phone screen and looked out the window.

“Everything okay?”

Jaehyun squeezes your thigh gently.

You turn to him. “Yeah..yeah definitely. It’s just…”

His brows raise. “Just what?”

You frown. “I have to take care of something again tonight.”

“Oh! Are you sure? Is it something I can help you with?” His hand grips the wheel as he speaks huskily. He was slowly starting to get  tired of you leaving him alone at nights. Something felt off again and he wasn’t sure why.

You sigh. “Unfortunately, no, I have to go in about 30 minutes.”

“Oh…damn.” He exhales.

You sit in silence for about two minutes as he drives home, then he pulls over on the side of the road.

“Something wrong with the car? What are you doing?” Are you nervous about him suddenly stopping? Does he know?

Jaehyun puts the car in park then turns to you. “You said 30 minutes, right?”

You nod as you stare at him with wide eyes.

“Okay..we have time..I’ve been thinking about you in that dress all night.”

He runs a hand through his hair then licks his lips.

He leans in for a kiss and you kiss him back fervently, he kisses you like he’ll never get a chance to again, tugging your bottom lip before licking over it. He turns his head to get more and you give him just what he is asking. His hands hold the sides of your face still as you fall into him more and more, but then, you remember the texts and pull away after a few seconds.

“God..you’re so good…but I really can’t..” you say breathily.

Jaehyun’s brows bunch together. “W-why?”

You look at his lips. “I really want to…I’ll make it up to you, okay?”

“But baby, we have like 25 minutes at least let me taste you..”

You shake your head. “I’m sorry, I’m just not in the mood tonight.”

You lied to him, but it was the only way to get him to start driving again.

You hadn’t had sex in 2 weeks, you wanted to, but it didn’t feel right.

“What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?”

You shake your head again while looking to the floor. You couldn’t look him in the eyes as your heart beat out of your chest.

“No..no, it’s not you, it’s me..I just need you to be patient with me, okay?”

“Oh, of course! I’m sorry.”

Jaehyun nods and puts the car back in drive, feeling like a huge jerk for making your discomfort about him.

As you’d done a week prior, you wait for Jaehyun to get inside then call an Uber.

You head inside Reina’s apartment and get ready for your second love video with her and Taeyong, her new male counterpart.

“Are you going to be able to do it this time?” She asks as you place your bag down on the couch. You look onto the intimidating setup with lights and a tripod before swallowing hard.

“She doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to..although it would be nice, I’m sure she tastes amazing.” Taeyong leaves the kitchen and heads towards you.

“I’m ready.” You look into his eyes. You couldn’t put up with this game of playing with Jaehyun’s heart for much longer. You were slowly starting to fall in love with him all over again, only hurting yourself in the process.  You knew how this would work out.

If it hurt you to do this to him, why didn’t it hurt him when he had done the same for months? Did he truly care about you?

“Great.” Reina smiles before handing you a baby pink lingerie set complete with a leather collar to put on. 

You freshen up in the bathroom and put the lingerie on. You look amazing, but you wished you felt the same way. It’s hard to be cruel, especially to someone you once loved.

You step out and hear ooo’s and aaa’s by both Reina and Taeyong.

“Thank you..” you smile slightly.

Having your pictures being shared all over,  being labeled as a slut awakened something inside of you. Was it so bad to have people list after your body? Well, not really. But you should at least get paid for it, right? At this point, you didn’t have anything to lose, but you’d get the opportunity to enact revenge on Jaehyun. That was your true goal.

“Now..let’s have some fun.” 

Reina places the final touches on your lipstick and looks into your eyes. “You look beautiful, y/n. I know it’s your first time, and I know you’re nervous, but it will be okay, just follow my lead.”

You lay down on the bed and stare at the camera as she turns it on.

Comments flood the screen of the laptop behind it almost immediately. So many people were waiting for her, and in your novice mind, you still couldn’t compute just how big this online community is.

How could Jaehyun hide this from you for so long?

Taeyong wore pink shorts to match your set and a collar as well. He crawled onto the bed beside you before getting on his knees and leaning down.

“Baby girl..look at me..” the tattooed boy says smoothly. He uses two fingers to tilt your chin towards him. He smiles softly before placing his thumb on it and kissing your lips.

You had met him once before this to take your tests at the clinic together. Everything came back negative for all 3 of you, relieving you of any concerns regarding that. Nonetheless, he seemed to be a sweet guy and his looks were just as striking as Jaehyun’s. 

His sharp jawline provided a wildly stark contrast to his large brown eyes. Reina described him as the perfect partner, and even thanked Jaehyun for leaving her as Taeyong was more “flexible,” and not just in terms of working hours.

He’d take any position she asked him to.

But when preparing for tonight, you asked that they both be in charge. You’d be the one to listen and follow their instructions.

Taeyong maneuvered his lips in a way that made you dizzy. Jaehyun was a great kisser, but Taeyong wrote the guidebook. His tongue overtaking yours as his bottom lip caressed yours. You moaned quietly, raising a hand to grasp his arm and pull him closer. He smelled and felt amazing as he bent over your body.

For a moment, you forgot about everything, you didn’t think about Jaehyun or even remember the blinking red light of the camera. All you felt was Taeyong, but then Reina places her phone down and gets onto the bed beside you. She kisses your neck, leaving her rouge and warmness all over it.

She kisses along your shoulder, sucking hard and biting into the skin slightly. You whimper at the sudden harshness of her teeth against you.

She then kissed lower and lower until getting to your bra. She pulls the cup covering your hard nipples down and begins to suck the nub. Taeyong releases your lips and kneels back away from you.

“Mhmm..just as sweet as I imagined.”

He smirks while rubbing his thumb along your lips, dipping it in and out slowly as you hollow your cheeks and suck.

They way he looks down at you with swollen red lips and they way Reina flicks her tongue against your sensitive breast makes your toes curl.

You watch him palms his hard member through his boxers, noting how a wet mark appears where his precum has already leaked. Turns out he’s just as turned on as you are.

“Do you want it?” Reina pulls away to ask.

You nod, completely unashamed of how desperate you seemed.

She chuckles. “You have to work for it first.”

Meanwhile, Jaehyun gets a text on his phone after getting home from his walk with Dora. His eyes widened.

He immediately tries to call you, but you don’t answer. He doesn’t stop, dialing you over and over hopes that you pick up. Little does he know that all parts of you are currently occupied by Reina and Taeyong.

Your phone lights up on the kitchen counter from his notifications while you take Taeyong’s cock into your mouth.

Your fingers find Reina’s dripping flower as she continues to suck your nipples.

Taeyong grabs the leash attached to your collar and tugs it slightly to choke you.

“Such a good girl..taking me all in like that.”

You involuntarily moan, sending vibrations onto him. He groans and curses as he moves his hips to drive himself deeper and deeper into your throat.

Reina dips her fingers into your thong and begins flicking the tips against your clit.

You begin to choke as you have trouble breathing while Taeyong destroys your throat. The feeling is raw, but you’re so wet by being like this for them, you don’t mind it.

You feel dizzy and drool drips down your chin.

Taeyong is turned on by the sight below him, his movement stutters as he pulls out and pants. You look up with wide eyes while breathing heavily. Something about him was hypnotizing. You lay your tongue out as he unloads onto it, feeling yourself clench around nothing as you cum as well.

Jaehyun stares at his screen after hearing your voicemail come up for the 10th time. It was vital that he get through to you now. What could’ve been so important that you wouldn’t answer him?

He then sees a notification pop up at the top of it.

“watch Rein on Me Live right now! First 2 minutes FREE” 

“Rein on Me” is Reina’s username.

His breath hitches in his throat. Why does he still have her notifications set to “on”?” He thinks to himself and turns the screen off. 

He sits down on the couch and puts his elbows on his knees while thinking about where you could possibly be right now.

And then, curiosity gets the best of him. He picks the phone up, clicking the link while holding his breath.

Why is his heart racing? Is he curious to see if she’s gotten another partner for her videos? He’s not sure why, but what he sees shocks him, breaking his heart instantly.

You are on your knees with your ass up, having your collar pulled by Reina who is below you.

Taeyong pushes into you while you choke on Reina’s strapped on cock.

Taeyong grabs your ass, slamming into you so hard, feeling tears escape the corner of your eyes. 

“Oh look..she’s crying, Tae. I think you should give her something to cry harder about.”

You put a hand up behind you and onto his abs, pushing him away slightly, begging him to be softer on you.

But he chuckles then slams into you again while placing two fingers into your clit and rubbing circles onto it.

“Oh? Is this too much for you?”

They did give you a safe word for when it all came to be too much, but you wouldn’t dare say it now. Although you were being stuffed on both ends and had trouble breathing as a result, Taeyong felt amazing in between your velvet walls and his loud groans and whimpers told you he felt the same.

You shake your head.

“Good, because you’re gripping my cock like you love this. Isn’t that right? Our girl is a slut, Reina, look at her drooling again.”

The chat room is filled with praises and donations. The viewers loved seeing you like this and hearing the dirty talk between the two. Some wanted to be you, and some wanted to fuck you.

Jaehyun’s eyes grow, his focus shifts from the video and to the comments requesting even lewder acts from the 3 of you. How could this happen? How could you betray him like this? Either way, he has to stop this now.

He puts his phone in his pocket and heads out.

He drives angrily, finding it hard to see the road through his teary eyes. He was so angry he could feel the heat escaping his nostrils as he gripped the steering wheel hard.

Meanwhile, it was Reina’s turn to fuck you with her strap.

She lays on the bed on her back, facing the camera upside down. She rubs her soft hands along your thighs as you mount her.

“Ride me well, or we’ll spank you until you can’t sit on your ass for weeks.”

“Yes..” you lower your aching pussy onto the dual ended strap and begin moving.

Reina whimpers as her side of the dildo enters her with each time you go down.

“That’s it, baby, don’t stop.” Taeyong says breathily in your ear while unhooking your bra. 

“Fuck.” He kneels behind you, bringing your hand to cup his hard cock.

He kisses your neck as he pinches your nipples to hear you cry out his name.

Reina rubs your clit with her thumb making you gasp and swivel your hips faster to gain another high. Taeyong then tilts your head towards him and kisses you deeply. He grips your throat, squeezing slightly as his tongue explores your mouth.

He begins to leak all over your hand, but you don’t stop pumping him. You close your eyes and ride Reina even faster, enjoying Taeyong’s passionate kiss as you imagine it to be him you were on top of.

He pulls away, allowing a string of spit to connect your two mouths.

He licks it up then looks into your eyes with a lustful stare. “She’s close, be a good girl and make her cum.”

You nod then lower yourself onto Reina, pulling her bra down to reveal her incredibly perfect breasts. You lick and suck her nipples while fingering her clit.

Taeyong licks his lips at the sight of your dripping opening gliding up and down on the dildo with ease. He pumps his cock and aligns it with your ass while your focus remains on coaxing a well deserved orgasm out of Reina.

He enters you unexpectedly, forcing just half of himself into you before you let out a high pitched scream.

“Oh my god!” You grip the sheets on either side of Reina’s head while your legs tremble at the feeling of being stretched out.

“Ahh kitten, so tight..fuck.” He grabs your waist, digging his fingertips into it to leave what may be a permanent indentation.

He pushes himself all the way in, making you cry again.

You rub your own fingers into Reina faster, making her cum hard. Her eyes roll to the back of your head as she pulls on your leash.

“You’re so pretty like this, isn’t she Tae?”

Reina moans out. “Yes..the prettiest kitten.” He struggles to get out while watching himself enter your tight opening once more.

Reina moves from under you, pulling the strap out of both her and you.

She takes the end that was inside you and puts it in front of your face. “Open, and taste yourself.” She demands.

You open your mouth, sucking it off while looking into her eyes.

You whimper as Taeyong goes so deep inside you, you feel you might go crazy and truly won’t be able to walk for another week. It’s a miracle how he's able to be so big.

“Come on, baby, tell me how good it feels to have me fill you up like this.”

“Feels..so good..” you can’t hold your body up anymore, you fall into the bed as he pounds into you.

More and more payments flood the notification on the laptop screen. Taeyong pushes into you faster while grabbing your leash, and you’re both about to cum again when you hear the front door fly open.

Your eyes open in confusion as you look up at Reina.

She looks confused too. She quickly pauses the broadcast and right after the bedroom door flies open.

“Get the fuck off of her!” Jaehyun stomps towards Taeyong, laying a fist into his face so fast, all 3 of you fail to comprehend exactly what’s happened.

Taeyong falls into the bed as Reina rushes over.

“Jaehyun!” You yell, jumping off of the bed and grabbing the sheets to cover your body.

There goes your dazed feeling.

“What the FUCK is going on here? Reina, what the hell did you do? How could you get her involved in something like this?!” Jaehyun is so angry, his hands create fists at his sides as he glares at Reina. She doesn’t pay attention to him, however, trying to see just how bad his punch was towards Taeyong.

You calm your nerves and finally tell Jaehyun the truth.

“It was my idea, Jaehyun..I want to do this…to get back at you.” 

He turns to you with a confused look in his eyes. You don’t turn away from his stare this time, you look into his eyes and remain strong. You thought of all the nights you cried yourself to sleep, of all the times you felt like you weren’t good enough for him.

You thought of his betrayal and the acts it left you.

“W-what?”

You scoff. “Don’t give me that, Jaehyun. I know it was you..I know that it was you who sold the pictures of me and put them up on campus.” You walk closer and closer to him while speaking harshly. 

“I know you wanted to embarrass me and make me desperate for you..so I tricked you..like you tricked me this entire time, I made you fall in love, just so I could break your heart.”

Jaehyun’s eyes widen as they fill with tears. His mouth falls open. “You…you really think I could do that to you?”

You nod. “After everything you did to me, you still try to pretend to love me.”

Jaehyun gasps. “Pretend?” He shakes his head. “I have always loved you. There’s not a moment in my goddamn life that I don’t think about you.”

You finally break your gaze, finding it hard to keep your eyes focused on him as he cries endlessly.

“Look..I may have done something shitty and I deeply regret it, but I could never embarrass or dehumanize you like that.” He sniffles. “I’d never put you in danger.”

“Stop lying Jaehyun! We know you were trying to get back at both of us, I tried to stop you!” Reina yells while holding Taeyong, who is still knocked out.

“Fuck you! You’re the reason all of this is happening.”

He takes his phone out and shows you a text he received from his friend. The text he had been calling you about all night.

“Look.. it’s a photo taken from a security camera on campus. I asked my buddy, who volunteers at the police station, to do some digging for me two weeks ago because I wanted to find out who’d done this to you.”

You look at the picture, a breath leaving you once you see who is stapling a print out of your scandalous photo onto a tree.

You turn to her, tears falling onto your cheeks.

“You fucking bitch.”

Reina loses a semblance of her coolness and clears her throat.

“Why? Why did you do this to me?” You sob.

“Because she wants me! She’s so desperate to have me to herself, she’d do something as cruel as this!”

You hold your face in your hands.

“Jaehyun..I’m so sorry..” you reach out to hold him, but he pulls away.

“I’m not surprised by her, but I’m disappointed in you. You’ve hurt me..so badly.” He walks out as you run after him, still clutching the sheet to your body.

“Jaehyun, please!! She showed me the video you made a week before you came to my moms house! She said you were back to making videos together!” You tell him, but Jaehyun shakes his head and turns to you in shock.

“I’d been taking exams the entire time, y/n. There’s no way I’d do that! She just uploads old videos of us to get more money!”

You look back at Reina as she leaves the room too. “Oh..my God.” You crouch down to the floor. How could you be so easy…again?

Reina chuckles and crosses her arms before leaning against the door frame. She nods. “Well..this isn’t exactly how I’d expect things to go down, but I should’ve known you’d still be subscribed to me as part of the notification crew..” she whistles before continuing.

“Yes..I lied, yes..I hacked his iCloud and printed those sexy pics of you, y/n. But it’s only because I wanted to teach him a lesson. He can’t leave me..I made him.” She laughs again. “And to leave me for you? Oh that pissed me off even more. He makes you seem like you’re an angel on Earth. No..he doesn’t deserve you, he deserves someone like me.“ She walks towards him and attempts to touch his chest but he steps back and looks down on her in disgust.

“Valentine Boy deserves someone as lustful, self-centered, and greedy as himself..”

“You’re cruel. And what you did was a crime. I hope it was worth it.”

He speaks sharply.

You cry and remember the call you had just a few weeks ago with her.

[REINA’s CALL]

“I understand why you’re upset..I’d be too, but you have to understand that this is just Jaehyun’s way of getting back at you.. he was upset that you made him stop. He was desperate for cash so he sold your pics y/n.”

You gasp while listening to her over the phone. Should you have listened to her? Maybe not, but could you really trust Jaehyun after everything? After all, he did take the photos.

“I begged him not to..I told him this would ruin you, but he did it anyway..he made some cash, but he didn’t expect whoever these jerks were to print them out and put them all over campus as a joke.”

You scoff. A joke? That’s all this was for them, a joke.

Reina continues. “He got drunk the other night and came to see me. He said that he didn’t expect all this to happen, but that it worked out in his favor anyway. You’d eventually realize that no one else would love you because you've been exposed and praised as a pornstar slut all over campus. You’d be reliant on him forever..or so he hopes. But I won't let that happen, y/n. I want to help you get your revenge.”

“Why should I believe you?”

Reina exhales. “Listen, I have nothing to lose by telling you the truth. As a matter of fact, I have something to gain. If he gets back with you, he’ll stop doing videos with me, and I’ll stop making money. So I’ll need you to break his heart, therefore he’ll come running back to me. Capeesh? Everyone is happy. And I’d you don’t believe me, take a look at the link I just texted you..”

You look at your phone and click the link. It’s a video of Jaehyun and Reina on OnlyCams with the broadcast date showing “One Week Ago.”

Your brows bunch as you grind your teeth. This bastard was already back to this without you being in his life.

He was misleading you again.

“See? You’ve only been separated for a few weeks and he’s already back to making videos and money with me..”

You can almost hear her smile over the phone as you sit there with steam escaping your ears.

“What is it you want from me?” You let out through clenched teeth.

“Ask to be his girlfriend again, then start making videos with me..break his heart this time so that he gives up on you..get your revenge and make money at the same time. You’re pretty enough and by now I’m sure you’re used to everyone looking at your body. So…join us.”

[PRESENT DAY]

“Jaehyun..wait..please, I was stupid, I’m sorry I hurt you!”

You stand up from the floor and hurriedly change into your T-shirt and sweatpants that you brought. You run after Jaehyun as he heads out of the door.

However, Reina pushes you to the side to run after him first. She hurries down the stairs.

“Jaehyun!! Don’t go..I love you more than she does, can’t you see? I went through all this trouble for you! I never doubted you, I never hurt you, I only loved you and shared what I had!”

She wraps her arms around his waist from the back, keeping him still as she sobs.

“You’re everything to me, I need you, baby.”

Your mouth falls open as you watch from the top of the stairs.

This was Reina’s plan all along and you fell for it, like an idiot. You allowed yourself to be played.

You rush down and run away, through the trees, hoping that no one will find you. You’re beyond embarrassed and devastated at how everything has turned out.

Jaehyun pries Reina off of him, grabbing her arms off and pushing her away. She calls onto the ground and reaches up for him, but he only grimaces and steps back again.

“Leave me alone!! You’re fucking crazy! If I see you again, I swear I will call the cops!”

In a final desperate attempt, she grabs his ankle. “If you leave me, I will send everything to your dad!”

Jaehyun’s mouth falls open.

“You wouldn’t dare..” he says with venom on his tongue, he truly couldn’t believe she’d do this to him.

“I don’t love you, I never have and I never will.” He pulls his foot away and continues to his car to drive after you.

He looks all over but doesn’t see a trace in the night sky.

He then takes his phone out of his pocket and goes to dial you, but Reina grabs it out of his hand and throws it to the ground in a fit of rage, breaking it instantly.

“You fucking bitch!” He places both hands around her neck and begins to choke her.

She smiles. “Yes, Valentine Boy, come inside and punish me.”

He grows even angrier, letting go and jumping into his car.

“No no no..don’t go!” She slams the trunk of it as he drives off.

“Fuck…” he drives everywhere, looking through the woods to see if he can catch a glimpse of you running through them. 

You find somewhere to rest and crouch down while crying. Your hands shake. How could everything go to shit so quickly?

You take your phone and call Bella.

“Hey..I’m coming over.” You sob.

When you get to your shared apartment, Bella welcomes you with a big hug. “I missed you so much.” She tears up.

You sit down and explain everything to her as she consoles you. Jackson is there as well, making ramen noodles in the kitchen for you.

“Y/n..it’s not your fault, I probably would’ve done the same thing.” He says as he walks in with a bowl.

You take it from him as you sniffle.

“She’s a bitch, she manipulated you. God I can't wait until she gets arrested!”

Bella clenches her fists.

“How..will Jaehyun forgive me? He’ll never look at me again.” You cry harder again.

“No no don’t say that, you’ve forgiven him more than once, he’ll probably forgive you too. Just talk to him…give him some time to calm down, then call him.” Bella rubs your back as you listen. She was right, if Jaehyun truly loved you, maybe he would see it from your point of view and forgive you.

You nod. “Okay.”

And after finishing your noodles and taking a shower, you fall asleep.

———

[The Next Day]

You rub your swollen, red eyes and pick up your phone instantly.

You have no new notifications Jaehyun, only his missed calls from before everything went down. You swallow hard and dial him back, but it goes straight to voicemail. You then send him a text, but receive a message.

The subscriber you are trying to message is not accepting calls or texts at this time.

You sigh and put your phone down on the bed. As expected, Jaehyun blocked you. He’s deeply hurt and wants nothing to do with you. And so you cry again, clutching your pillow to your chest as the day goes on.

Jaehyun stares out of his window and thinks of you. He misses you so much, and now he can’t call you as his phone was destroyed by Reina.

Now that he’s calmed down and erased the image of you having sex with another man from his mind for a moment, he realizes you  both messed up, you both hurt each other and he wanted to talk with you to see if you still don’t trust him or rather, do you love him at all anymore?

He’s not sure if you’re at your mom’s place or your place near campus with Bella, or if you even made it home safe..but he needs to find you.

He takes a shower, feeds and walks Dora then gets ready to head out in the afternoon, but he is stopped when he hears a knock on his door.

Dora barks before he shushes her and taps her behind lightly.

He braces himself. Could it be Reina? Could it be you? Could it be the guy he knocked out?

He looks through the peephole and sees someone he didn’t expect.

He opens the door and allows the man in.

“How’s my favorite nephew doing?” Jaehyun’s uncle, Charlie, pats his shoulder before stepping towards the couch.

Jaehyun looks at him nervously, but follows behind.

His uncle is a professor at the college. He was instructed by his father to watch over Jaehyun carefully, but in respect for Jaehyun’s growth as an adult, Charlie never overstepped or took his role too seriously.

“Hi..what’s going on?”

He places his bag down and sits beside him.

“Well..you and I…I guess I should say, you are in some deep shit.”

Jaehyun places his hands in a fist in front of him and his eyes lay on the coffee table.

He placed his fingers over his bruised knuckles, swallowing hard as he anticipates what his uncle will say next.

Not many things bothered Jaehyun, but impromptu visits from his family members always made him uneasy. 

“You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that girl whose pictures were put all over campus the other day, would you?”

Charlie leans forwards

“Why do you ask?”

Jaehyun clears his throat.

“Oh well…I just thought you might know something..” 

Jaehyun turns to him and speaks softly. “Uncle..why are you really here?”

“Jaehyun..you know..how your father is..”

Upon hearing this, Jaehyun suddenly remembers Reina’s threat. His eyes widened.

“He knows..I know, your mom knows…I mean, personally, I don’t care, it’ll all be erased at some point, but Jaehyun..it’s not looking good for you.”

His uncle continues as he sits back on the couch and exhales.

“Why’d you do it? It’s not like you need the money. Is this like a young couple thing? Is she your..girlfriend?”

“No!…no, not at all..” Jaehyun stands up. He’s furious that Reina really actually exposed him to his father despite knowing their rocky relationship with each other.

“I’m not sure why I did it, Charlie, maybe I needed to feel independent. Maybe I just don’t like asking my hypocritical father for anything..”

Charlie nods, sighing again before fixing his tie. “Well, Jaehyun..whatever your reason is, I get it. You’re your own person.”

Jaehyun stands in silence while clenching his fist.

“Nonetheless, your father is pissed…he wants you back in Korea.”

“What?!” Jaehyun turns around and stares in shock.

“I know..I know..he’s a bit dramatic, but he’s not happy about you becoming a “pornstar.” His words, not mine.”

Jaehyun shakes his head. “I’m not going back.”

Charlie stands and holds his hands out in front of him. “Look, I know you love it here and you don’t want to be anywhere near your father, but think of it this way. You can start fresh back home and learn what it’s like to run a business. Eventually, you’ll make your own money again and won’t have to rely on anyone!”

“But that’s exactly what’s gonna happen! I’ll have to rely on him to get the position! It’s not fair!”

“Jaehyun..I know, you’re upset right now, but just go..at least for the summer break. Maybe you need some time away to rethink everything.”

“No..I won’t.” He looks into Charlie’s eyes.

“Tell him I said “no.””

Charlie sighs and looks to the floor. “He won’t pay for your college anymore…you’ll officially be on your own, cut out of the family name completely, is that what you really want?”

Jaehyun remains silent as he contemplates his choices.

“Think about it and let me know soon so I can help, I’ll try to calm him down for now.”

He lays a hand on his shoulder and leaves.

———

[3 Days Later]

You finally leave your bed and decide to treat yourself to some coffee from the cafe on campus. Jaehyun never showed up or called so you stopped expecting him to. However, you still thought about him all the time. You missed him so much, but if space is what he wanted, then you were in no position to deprive him of that.

This was your punishment for hurting him.

You stuff your hands in your hoodie and look up at the menu, knowing very well that you’ll just choose what you always do. An iced grande caramel macchiato.

You smile while taking the drink from the barista and look for a seat.

You find your favorite comfy chair in the corner and place your laptop on the table in front of it.

So far, your day is going pretty well. Favorite drink, favorite seat. What else would go right for you?

You needed to distract yourself from thinking of Jaehyun. You take a few sips while reading a novel Bella recommended to you. 

Gentle Monsters.

It’s about a woman who runs, literally, into a handsome man that operates a glass conservatory. The catch is he happens to be hiding a dark secret.

Your eyes scan through the pages quickly as the drama gets juicy and then..your laptop screen is pushed down.

“Hey! What the h-“

“Hey..”

Your eyes grow when you see who takes a seat across from you.

“T-Taeyong?”

“Mhm” he smiles while sipping a pink drink. He wore sunglasses and as he tilted his head, you could see remnants of the bruise Jaehyun left him.

“What..are you doing here?”

“Oh, I didn’t know dashingly good looking boys couldn’t be college students too.”  He says sarcastically.

“I didn’t know you studied here..so does that mean..you saw my pictures? Did you know about me before we met?”

Your face becomes warm as you lean forward and whisper.

“No..I didn’t..I don’t pay that much attention to what happens on campus to be honest.”

You exhale and relax in your chair.

“And if I had, what would it matter now? I’ve already seen…everything..” he eyes you up and down. His gaze is almost too much to bear and you start to feel like Patrick Starr’s rock home under the sea is the perfect place for you right about now.

“Ugh..” you close your eyes and shake your head. “Please..don’t remind me.”

Taeyong’s mouth falls open. “What? Was it that bad?”

“No..it was..magnificent..you were, I mean, are magnificent..it’s just…”

He chuckles as you stumble over your words.

What could you say? He had an intense aura about him that made you nervous. What made matters worse was the fact that a small part of you wanted to kiss him again.

“Oh..magnificent, I like that.” He says in a growl while running a hand through his luscious brown hair.

For some reason, it felt like you were cheating on Jaehyun again so you looked away quickly. “I’m..sorry about Jaehyun, he shouldn’t have hit you..it’s all my fault.”

He shrugs. “It’s fine..you can just make it up to me later.”

You laugh and look outside the window. “Gosh you’re interesting..”

“And magnificent..” he places his sunglasses on top of his head to wink at you.

“Hey!” A girl stops by your table and squints.

“Aren’t you that girl from the posters?” Her friend beside her snickers.

“Oh..” you look down at the table.

They laugh loudly, and begin to create a scene inside the quiet cafe. “Nice! I guess nothing is left to the imagination anymore! Talk about desperate!”

You swallow hard and tap the table while waiting for them to just walk away. You could’ve gone off on them, but what would that do? They’d only make fun of you as more people look up and start to recognize your face too.

Taeyong grows angry once he sees how upset you look. “What’s so funny? Look, I’d be insecure too when she has a perfect face and body and I look like..” he looks her up and down and grimaces. 

“that..” he fakes a total body shiver.

“Better get going, I think Shrek is looking for his long lost cousin.” He says smoothly while giving an evil glare. He puts a finger on his chin and squints. “Congratulations on being the first ogres to be admitted to this school. Yay! diversity!”

You can’t help but laugh.

“Go away now before I call animal control.” he shoos them away.

Damn, he was lethal. You’d hate to be on his bad side.

The girl’s friend scoffs before saying “fuck you..” and walks away.

“I wouldn’t fuck you with the lights off, bitch.”

Your eyes grow.

“Taeyong!”

“What? They’re rude and ugly.” He rolls his eyes.

You found it hot that he’d defend you like this and simply laugh again.

“Anyway, once I found out about Reina’s plan and what she did to you, I left. I want nothing to do with her.” He sips his drink again.

“Yeah..I’m sorry she used you too..”

“Oh don’t be sorry, on the bright side, I got to meet you.” 

A moment of silence rests between the two of you.

You nod and start to gather your things.

“Well, I should get going!”

“Y/n..” he says as he touches your hand on the table.

“I’d love to spend time with you again..”

You take your hand away and tuck it into your pocket again.

“Oh..I don’t plan on doing anything like that ever again, I’m sorry.”

Taeyong laughs. “No..of course not like that, get your head out of the gutter…I mean, time like this at a cafe or park, or something..you’re nice to talk to.”

“Oh..shit, I don’t know why I was thinking that like of course you meant just regular time like this, it’s just the way you said it, you know like the way you touched my hand, I-“

He laughs before standing up from the table. “You’re a mess, let me walk you out.”

Taeyong held your hand to help you stand up from the soft chair.

You walked outside together, but said your goodbyes as you headed in different directions.

“Y/n..” he calls out to you as you walk away.

“Yeah?”

“Phone.”

You fish your phone out of your pocket quickly and hand it to him. He smiles from ear to ear as he puts his number into your phone.

“Don’t be shy now, remember I’ve already seen everything..” he leans in close to your ear. “And I love it..”

You gasp as you punch his chest lightly.

“I’ll see you later, sweetheart.”

He waves while trotting away.

You stand there dumbfounded and completely smitten by the man, then you suddenly remember Jaehyun and wonder if these new feelings told you you were over him.

Jaehyun wonders the same thing as he watches from across the street.

He was heading to your place with a bouquet of flowers when he saw you and the man he punched leaving the cafe. He decided to park into a spot a few spaces away and watch your interaction.

You looked..happy. This man made your eyes light up, and the sight was much more painful than watching you get fucked by him.

He now knew that emotions were involved. But did he have any right to be upset? If you decided to move on, why shouldn’t he accept that? You’re doing what’s best for you.

He looks at the flowers in his passenger seat.

He was hurt by everything, but he still felt bad for dragging you into all of this in the first place. He was going to apologize and attempt to prove his worthiness as a boyfriend once more, but after seeing you so happy with another man, he isn’t sure if he had any more chances to take.

A few hours later, you receive a call from campus police.

They positively identified Reina as the person that placed the photos everywhere so they ask if you’d like to press charges for harassment while they charge her for vandalism and breaking into private property.

You nod and say “yes.” The process would be long to convict her of this crime against you, for anyone could argue that you voluntarily took the photos. But you’re determined to teach her and anyone else that thinks of posting “revenge porn” a lesson.

———

[One Week Later]

You finally receive a text from Jaehyun.

Jaehyun to You: I just got a new phone..I’m sorry for taking so long, would you like to go somewhere?

You tremble slightly and respond. You were starting to get used to not hearing from him so this shocked you

You to Jaehyun: yes

You needed to apologize again, but more importantly, you needed to know how Jaehyun felt about you after everything. Does he still want to date you? Could you make this work?

Later that day you meet up at the park.

Jaehyun arrives with Dora and sits on a bench.

You immediately sit down as well and start to per her.

“Y/n..” Jaehyun says with his warm honey voice. You always grow weak when he calls your name.

You look up at him, taking in the brokenness in his eyes

“I’m so sorry, Jaehyun..I..I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Jaehyun shakes his head. “No, I’m sorry. After everything I put you through, I honestly deserved that.”

“Jaehyun..I’m so tired..I don’t know what’s going on anymore, everyone on campus thinks I’m a slut and I feel so dumb and pathetic.” You start to tear up.

“No, they don’t. They’ve already forgotten about it, okay? And come fall semester, absolutely no one will remember you as that girl.”

You sniffle and nod. Thank God for summer break.

“I think..I just need time..it’s all too much.” You look up at him and Jaehyun isn’t sure if you need time away from everything or just time away from him.

He scoots closer to you on the bench and takes your hands in his. “Don’t worry about anything, I’m here for you, okay? We can start over. We can be completely honest with each other this time.”

You look to the sky as he continues.

“Please, y/n, please come back to me. I promise to make it all right.”  

If you say yes, I’ll stay, even if that means betraying my father, he thinks to himself.

You still sit quietly and think to yourself.

You loved Jaehyun, but you found yourself second guessing everything, could you truly be like how you once were. Then, there are your wandering eyes and emotions. If you loved him with all your heart, how could you possibly think of another man in that way?

And the question that screamed the loudest was why? Why did Jaehyun click the notification from Reina’s livestream in the first place?

You look back to Jaehyun who anxiously awaits your answer, his eyes glossy with tears.

“Jaehyun…I” you start to cry, you can’t hold back your emotions as you fear that  deep down, you already know the answers to all of these questions.

”Do you still love me?” He asks with tears flowing in a steady stream. Your heart breaks to see his lovely eyes so red.

Your mouth falls open.

Why are you hesitating?

“I- '' want to, is what you wanted to say, but just couldn't.

You can’t answer because you know you still don’t trust him. Furthermore, you aren’t sure if you love him or only lust after him.

But still, why is your heart cracking slowly while you both cry? You can almost hear it inside your chest.

Jaehyun nods and stands up before wiping his tears away. “I won’t bother you anymore, y/n..”

“Jaehyun..don’t.” You stand up and grab his hand before he can walk away.

He pulls away and takes Dora’s leash.

Make it easy, lie and rip the band aid off. 

He clears his throat. “I actually wanted to meet with you..because I’ve been thinking during our time away from each other…I don’t think I love you anymore…”

And there it was, the sound of your heart finally falling to the ground and breaking into a million pieces that were beyond repair.

You weren’t sure if you loved Jaehyun, but to hear him say he doesn’t love you is a pain unlike any other.

“…and I think it’s time to move on.” He turns away from you, knowing that the look on your face would only make him fall to the ground and sob.

But deep down, he knows he lies because it’s easier for him to decide for you. This was the only way you could move on. He had to make you hate him.

“You and I both know we only use each other for sex…this isn’t love, it never was, and it has no chance of ever being that..that’s why I cheated on you and felt no emotion.”

He turns back to you and speaks sternly. “If we were to date again, I’d probably cheat again in hopes of finding the true love I crave and don’t receive from you..”

His words stung like sharp daggers and you’re pretty sure even Caesar had an easier pain than what you feel right now.

For a few minutes, you are completely speechless and debate whether or not you should argue with him. But instead, you nod and walk away. “Okay Jaehyun, goodbye.”

You can't see your way through the park as water floods your eyeballs. You finally stop at a stream and clutch your chest.

The tears never stop, your head starts hurting and you feel yourself on the verge of a panic attack.

You call Bella who hears your gasps and panic over the phone. 

“Take deep breaths! I’ll be right there!”

She rushes from home to get to you while you go dizzy.

Jaehyun has trouble driving home, his teary eyes causing the road to blur. He pulls over and pounds his fist against the steering wheel.

“Fuck!” He yells before holding his face in his hands. He didn’t expect saying goodbye to be so difficult, he didn’t expect to regret it for the rest of his life.

He just broke the heart of his one true love.

———

[A Few Months Later]

“Come on, Dora, let’s get back inside.”

Jaehyun calls after Dora to go back into his mom’s house in Korea.

His mom sits at the table as she goes over the final preparations for his father’s funeral.

The real reason Jaehyun’s father sent for him was because he was ill and only given a few months to live by doctors. He did scold him for creating such scandalous videos, but didn’t spend too much time on it as he had more pressing matters at hand.

Jaehyun deleted all social media and focused on his father’s health as a result. To you, it seemed he had fallen off the face of the Earth.

He trained Jaehyun and taught him some of what he needed to know about the business during his final days alive. Jaehyun was thankful for the opportunity and finally found himself bonding with him after all this time.

“I can teach you all about finances and numbers, Yoon Oh, but I can’t teach you about being passionate about it. At the end of the day, you’ll only regret what you didn’t do for your heart..I guess, that’s why we didn’t see eye to eye before.”

He chuckles before coughing. “It took me getting to this point to realize..All my life, I had no true passion. Nothing worth missing.”

Jaehyun sits at his father’s bedside as he prepares to say goodbye.

He cries while listening to him speak.

“You were always so passionate about art and all this stuff I didn’t understand..I didn’t respect it because I didn’t get it..but what does it matter? It’s about you.. and if it makes your heart happy…if it makes your soul complete, then why should you let it go?”

His father passed away peacefully the next day, leaving Jaehyun with wise words he’d never forget.

A few weeks after the funeral, Jaehyun is tasked with deciding whether or not to stay and gradually take over the business or to go back to college and finish his studies.

Being away from you gave Jaehyun the chance to learn more and think with a clearer mind, hence his decision to go back.

He told his mother he’d be going back only to get his degree, but really, he found his fathers words hard to ignore.

“If it makes your heart happy, if it makes your soul complete..then why should you let it go?”

For Jaehyun, this was about you. He couldn’t fight the urge to love you, he couldn’t just let you go like that.

So he leaves Dora with his mom and heads back.

He knows it will take some time to make up for his shitty actions, but he’d do whatever it takes to love you again, even if that meant watching you from a distance. Just seeing your smile and laugh was enough for him.

He’d complete his studies, but he’d always have you on his mind. 

He keeps in touch with your mom without you knowing, that is, until Christmas dinner that year.

He knocks on her door and waits patiently for her to open it. It would be the first time you’d see each other since he broke up with you. It was going to be difficult, but he had to try. 

What he didn’t account for was the fact that your mind may have already been set on someone else..the strange, handsome fellow named Sicheng that sat across from him now at the dinner table.

The End

Thank you again for going on this journey with me, i hoped you enjoyed it xoxo - Krys

(Hint: check out the agreement to see what happens during the Christmas dinner hehe)

#nct #nct au #nct smut #nct scenarios #jaehyun #jaehyun au #jaehyun x y/n #jaehyun x you #nct fanfic #Jaehyun boyfriend #nct romance #nct boyfriend #nct reactions #nct series #nct hard hours #nct angst #jung jaehyun #nct 127 au #nct x reader #nct x you #nct x y/n

[devildom-moss]

Pride Month 2.0?

Mammon: Happy pride month, MC!

(LGBTQ+) MC: That was two months ago, Mammon. It’s August.

Mammon: But I thought there were two: the sixth and ninth month… because 69. Plus, August is the hottest month, and you’re the hottest person I know, so that checks.

MC: I don’t know where to start with that. . .

Mammon: Whatcha mean?

MC: (1) Pride month - not months. There’s just one for LGBTQ+ people, and it’s in June. (2) July is the hottest month for many places; if you jinx it so this August is hotter that July already was, I will rip out your spine and boil it on the hood of your car until I have a nice Mammon bone broth. (3) Straight people 69. . . I think. I haven’t asked, but I’m sure they do. (4) August is the eighth month. September is the ninth month.

Mammon: Satan said humans had a secret, hidden month halfway through the year that you could only unlock if you were rich, and because the rich control the human world, everyone else goes along with their calendar, making July the eighth month, August the ninth, and so on.

MC: That does sound like something rich people would do, but no. Satan! Get in here!

Satan: Why are you being so loud? Need something, MC? Is Mammon bothering you?

Mammon: Shuddup! I’m a delight! Call me flavored iced coffee the way I’m a whole carton of delight.

Satan: . . .

MC: . . . So, Satan, do you want to teach me about pride month 2.0?

Satan, knowing he’s been caught: Queer people aren’t your personal teachers, MC.

MC: We’re both queer, you little shit. I thought I told you to stop lying to Mammon!

Satan: Come on, it was funny.

MC: Keep it up, and I’ll fuck your brother!

Mammon: I’ll do it! I’m a brother. I’m right here.

Satan: He believed there was a universally accepted, special “secret” month for rich humans. I can only be partially responsible for taking advantage of his stupidity.

MC: Okay, I’ll partially punish you, and Lucifer can punish you the rest of the way.

Lucifer, who was eavesdropping the whole time: Actually, I’m letting him have this one.

MC: What?

Lucifer: It was funny.

Mammon: MC is the only one who’s nice to me.

Lucifer: I've never threatened to reduce your boiling bones into a broth over the hood of your car, but sure, MC's the nice one.

Satan: Oh, that's a good one, MC.

#I don't really remember why this entered my head #but now you're all cursed with it #mammon #satan #lucifer #gn!mc #obey me chat text #obey me crack #obey me #obey me satan #obey me mammon #obey me luficer

[sokovianheadtilt]

Dancing In The Dark

Bucky Barnes x black!reader

Summary: Y/N is 6 months pregnant, Bucky finds her in the kitchen at 3am indulging in her slightly odd cravings

Warnings: Pure fluff 

A/N: Just realized I haven’t added anything to the My Little Love universe since last June…my bad y’all I’m gonna be more consistent I swear :) also, HAPPY PRIDE🏳️‍🌈 (p.s., there’s one line in here that may seem like a taylor swift reference but it’s not, I just thought it was cute lol)

Word Count: 844

SERIES MASTERLIST

Y/N glanced over at the clock sitting on her bedside table, the red glowing numbers reading 3:17am. She sighed and slowly got out of bed, rubbing her large belly that’s housing her two twin girls. When her and Bucky first found out, he was ecstatic that his family was growing at a faster pace, you’ve always wanted twins and now your dream is coming true. The only downside was that your precious angels gave you the weirdest cravings at the most unpredictable times, like right at this moment in the middle of the night. 

Y/N slowly got out of bed, looking over at Bucky to make sure he was still sleeping. You hated waking him up, it always made you feel guilty. You quietly made your way downstairs and looked in the fridge before finding what you wanted, pickles and mustard. You grabbed the items and went to sit at the kitchen table before opening the door, pouring some mustard onto it and took a bite. You let out a soft moan at the seemingly delicious taste and kept eating. 

You were on your third pickle before hearing footsteps coming down the stairs. Glancing up, you saw Bucky walking over to you with a sleepy smile. 

“Again sweetheart? Come on, you know my body knows when you’re not laying next to me” he chuckled and went over to press a kiss to your head “And this is not healthy” he gently took the jar and closed it 

“I know baby, but the babies- you know, the ones you put inside me?” she said as he interrupted “Oh please that night you were begging me to stay inside you, are you really shocked?” Y/N looked up at him “Yes, I was there, now what I was saying, your children give me these cravings, take it up with them” you told him, watching as he turned your chair towards himself, moving to kneel in front of your large belly. 

“My little princesses, Aurora and Arabella, maybe you should let your momma snack on some carrots or something so she can help you guys grow big and strong” he gently rubbed your belly as you ran your fingers through his hair. “I can’t wait to meet you both. I hope you look like your momma. She’s the most ethereal woman I have ever seen and you’re gonna love her” he pressed a gentle kiss to your stomach “Goodnight my angels” he stood up and went to put the pickles and mustard back in the fridge. 

You got up from the table and went to follow him, tears falling down your cheeks as you sniffled. Bucky looked up at you and frowned “Baby what’s wrong?” he cupped your face in his hands, wiping your tears away with his thumbs. “I-I just got so lucky you know? I have my dream man, dream life, gonna have 3 wonderful kids” you sniffled again “It’s all so perfect”

Bucky smiled at your declaration. He never thought he’d be able to have this type of life either. But the greatest day of his life was when you moved in next door, and now he’s here. 

“It is perfect my love” he pressed a kiss to her forehead “Because everyday when I see you, our little boy, and our little girls? I thank the heavens every day” 

He moved his hands to your waist, starting to gently sway with you in the refrigerator light, despite no music playing. Y/N moved her hands to rest on his shoulders, resting her forehead on his as he hummed gently. The way Bucky treats you is so…unlike you’ve ever experienced. He treats you like the finest china on the shelf, with so much love and respect, so gentle and caring, you never want to give that up. You never want to wake up in the mornings without him kissing you awake, making you breakfast in bed, watching him take care of a little boy who he treats like his own, you never want this to end. 

“Marry me” you whispered as you felt him stop moving and humming “What?” he said gently as you pulled away to look him in the eye “Marry me” you set a hand on his cheek “Bucky I never want to know what it’s like to live without you. You love Logan and our girls so much, you treat us all so well, and I just want to make our forever love official. So, James Buchanan Barnes, will you marry me?” Bucky looked at you with a stunned expression as he teared up “Y/N, my gorgeous angel, of course, I’ll marry you” he leaned in to kiss you passionately. When he pulled away, you saw the tear tracks down his face “Sweetheart, I promise to give you the wedding you deserve, anything you want, I’ll make it happen” he kissed your nose “Now, my sweet fiance, let’s go to bed” he took your hand, closed the fridge, bringing the both of you back upstairs, as fiances.

#sokovianheadtilt #my little love au #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x black!reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x pregnant reader

[xzhdjsj]

Tangled in Love

Andrew x Reader

Okay before you continue this, I wanted to let you know this fic mentions description of hair texture. The reader has wavy/curly hair! Additionally, this fic is a rewrite of part 6 of Andrew’s story.

+a lil rant before the actual fic (you can skip the first part but please read the second)

I wasn't going to post this because it's a self-indulgent piece but hey I’m sure someone out there will enjoy it too. I've struggled with my hair for quite a while. It was one of my biggest insecurities, and I never knew how to take care of it. For the majority of my life, I've treated my hair as though it was straight, using straight hair products and styles, because that's what I wanted my hair to be. I hated the 'frizz' which in actuality was just me damaging my curl pattern😭 Thankfully, even though I couldn't see it, the people around me did and helped me manage and properly care for my hair. These days, I embrace my curls, and I love them more than anything! If I'm not rocking my curly hair I feel incomplete, it's become a huge part of me! I still have a long way to go, but I'm beyond happy I was able to finally recognise how beautiful my hair is.

That being said, I want to remind all of you that YOU ARE PERFECT! I know we doubt and pick at ourselves from time to time, but it's important to remember THOSE DOUBTS DON'T DEFINE US! Every imperfection and flaw is what makes you perfectly, uniquely and most of all beautifully YOU. Please remember to be kind to yourself and never ever stop loving yourself ❤️

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

It's been months since Andrew ended things with me. At first, I prided myself in being mature and acted like the entire thing never even happened. I stopped sitting where his eyes can easily find me, I never take similar routes as he would and avoided his office at all cost. It was easy to find a temporary tutor to help with my assessments, that way I didn't even need to attend his tutorials. 

The less contact with him the better. This little routine was good and dandy, getting me by as I immersed myself completely in y work. If I distracted my mind, I wouldn't need to think of Andrew, right? Wrong.

So fucking wrong.

Every other thought, he was on my mind. I wondered how he'd answer questions on my exam preps, and his opinion on every sentence I wrote. I thought of him so much, it was sickening and before I knew it I was tired and relapsing.

I gave university my all until I couldn't anymore. I was heartbroken and ignoring my feelings only made them worst. They burdened my mind, and I spent nights upon nights crying my eyes swollen into my pillows. I knew I had to accept it somehow but the ghosts of him haunts me, even in my dreams.

Last night’s dream was an especially painful one. I vividly remember the look on his face and the way my heart shattered into a million pieces as he drove away that day. What a shit start to my day!

I rolled out of bed, heading straight for the bathroom where I splashed my face with cold water and looked into the mirror. What a mess, my hair was messy and unkept and not in and attractive, quirky way, more closely resembling a bird’s nest. I wonder if Andrew could ever love me even when I look like this.

I sigh, rubbing my temples and trying not to cry again. Maybe a nice long shower would help, so I did just that. I stayed under the running water for more than an hour, then detangled my hair before stepping out. It did help, at the very least I felt clean and refreshed.

Today was going to be more or less going to be simple, there was a single task posted on Moodle and that’s all I needed to get done.

I settled into a comfy set of clothes and started drying my hair, only to be interrupted by a knock on my door. Who could that be? I threw the towel over a chair and opened the door, and my eyes are met with the last person I wanted to see.

“Hi, I’m here to speak to you” His mouth is agape and he looks a bit shocked.

Speak to me? Here to speak to me? My mind roared. Absolutely not. I was about to slam the door in his face, but he steps forward.

“Only as a professor!” He clarifies. “May I please come in?”

“Fine, but make it quick.” I demanded.

He sighs, “Thank you.”

He steps inside and I lock the door behind him. A waft of his scent hitting my nose, God how I missed that.

“I've emailed you several times about booking a tutorial, whether that be online or in person, and I haven't heard anything back. Me being here is a last resort. It's part of my job to make my students are well, and that if they're struggling, I can point them in the right direction.” He paused, finally taking his eyes off me to look around. “You have a nice place. It's what I imagined it would look like.”

“That’s not why you’re here And- Mr. Marston.”

“Yes, strictly business it is then, though, I don't want to treat it as such.” His eyes are on me again, but I refuse to give him the same attention choosing to fidget with my fingers instead. “I'll try and keep things brief for the both of us. You've been attending as usual, on top of your work as usual and nothing on the surface warrants concern, but because this is around the time where I need to be updated on essay plans and what you intend to do, us talking to one another is inevitable and for your records, and my peace of mind, we must.”

“It’s going good.” I replied, monotoned.

“It’s going good? Is that’s all I get?” He pushes.

“It’s an update, is it not?”

“It's a different response. In the past when we had our tutorials, that went on for at least an hour, you were so passionate about your subject, you made your own reading list and clearly planned out your arguments. You talked me through every point and asked for my opinion just to be sure you couldn't look at it from any other angle because you were adamant about not just getting it right but understanding different perspectives. Tutorials are only supposed to last around half an hour. Why do you think I always put you in the last slot? The look you have when you lose yourself to your ideas, when your eyes spark with this clarity I never want to stop you mid-thought or let that light disappear.” He rants and I wish he’d stop describing me that way.

“First and foremost, I am your professor. I’m here to nurture your curiosity and always have you searching for answers so when you don't show up to your tutorials I get concerned.”

“But I attend classes and all my work is completed. Is that not enough?”

“Your work is fine but that's not the problem I-” He paused and sighs for the hundredth time, “I want to ask how you are.”

“Now you’re interested in that?”

“I never had the chance to and even if I did try to talk to you would you have answered?”

Well shit, he’s got me there. I stay quiet and stare at my feet.

“You've been avoiding me for over a month now and I completely understand why. It's enough that you're still going to classes and doing your work, and I can't imagine what you must be feeling having to be taught by me even now. For the pain I still give you, I am sorry. For the pain I gave you that day, I am sorry.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. “Is that why you’re here? To say sorry?”

“I didn't come here under the pretense of apologizing but… it's something I’ve been meaning to do for a while now. The rumours have died down but that doesn't change the thoughts people still have. It's not something that we should live with, but we must.” He regains his composure quickly, shifting the conversation back to university. “Anyway, care to tell me anything else about your essay? Any avenues you're thinking of exploring? Any reading material that's caught your eye?”

“What about you? Howe you Andrew?” I finally find his face with my eyes.

“I thought you wanted to keep this strictly business.” He uses my words against me. “Don't worry about me. I want you to focus on your studies.”

He smiles and it makes my heart skip a beat.

“Have you… Have you seen the petition?”

“Yes, I’ve seen it. I considered resigning and letting them win.” My eyes widen at his confession.

“Rumours can get out of hand quickly. Heh, never in my life did I think I’d be called such names. Now people think I let students get close to me to get good grades, no matter the gender. I’m a danger to all apparently.”

He sounds tired too, that’s one thing I can sympathise with him.

“The dean’s comment eased some of the backlash, but this is a burden I’ll most likely carry for the rest of my career.” He continued.

I stay quiet, unsure how to respond to him. I supposed we’ve both been hurting in our own ways.

“Can I be frank with you?” He catches my attention again and I look up from my thoughts. “I don’t regret any of it. It was one of the most honest decisions I’ve ever made. My only regret is not protecting you when it mattered and- and I’ll never be able to undo that.”

Fuck he always makes things so difficult for me.

“When I saw that video, and those comments I panicked. The first thing that came to my mind was how you’d feel reading them and how you’d continue knowing people thought of you that way. I know how that feels, something similar happened to me years ago. It hurts being ostracised and judged on lies and when you wade in that water you still have to hold your head up high, so you don’t drown. But thinking back I was irrational. I let my own fears get the better of me and made a decision that was not only mine to make. I… I should have spoken to you before driving you away. I’m not asking for your forgiveness or pity. I just need to let you know this.”

“So what now?”

“That’s a good question, I would say we continue as we are now, I only have your best interests at heart and that should be more important to me than my feelings for you.”

“You… you still have feelings for me?”

“Of course, I do! You think they just stopped? I tried burying them, stifling them, but every time you walked into my lectures it was impossible not to remember all the things we experience together.”

“Andrew look at me.” I shake my head. “I look awful, I’m a mess.”

“I disagree. You’re still as beautiful as the day I left you. If not, even more. Your hair, I- I’ve never seen it like that. It might just be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

My hair? I haven’t even straightened it like I always do. How could he find this beautiful?

“Still, you said it yourself, this could never work. Why would you-“ “I’m saying my heart wants to follow you again. Despite it all, I still want you.” He sounds so desperate, and I can feel my heart in my throat. “But this isn’t about what I want. It’s up to you. I you want nothing to do with me outside of university, so be it. If you want to give this a chance, a real chance, I’m fine with that too.”

“Andrew I-“ “You don’t need to give me an answer now, or at all actually. Just… do what you feel most comfortable with.”

That day I had a lot more to think of as I stood in front of my mirror once again. My hair was still unstraightened and a thought crossed my mind. I remember Andrew’s words before he left.

“I know I said it before, but your hair really does beautiful. I can’t quite get over it. It suits you.”

Maybe if I was going to give this another shot, it was time to start afresh. No more secrecy and sneaking around. I stare at my hair in the mirror. Maybe it did suit me and it wouldn’t hurt to try something new, would it?

-

Months later I feel so much better, the air is clearer, the sun is shining and I’m finally ready to talk to Andrew again.

I sat the window of the café I asked to meet at, looking over at the door each time the bell chimed. This time I was right, it was him. He spots me quickly and walks over.

“Hi, I know I’m a little early. May I sit?”

“Of course, please do” I urge him.

“I see you changed your hair. It looks really good.”

I run my fingers across the soft curls on my shoulder.

“Less of a change more of an embrace I’d say. I thought it was about time I stopped straightening it and wear my natural hair.”

“Not that you were any less beautiful before, but I find it harder to keep my eyes off you now.”

I smile. My cheeks are probably flushed, I can feel them all warm like the fuzzy feeling in my stomach.

“You know it’s very similar to my decision.” I tell him. “It’s another thing I want to embrace and flaunt to the world.”

“And I'll accept it no matter what it might be. So, what's your decision?”

My ass is off the chair in an instant, and I lean over the table to pull his face to mine. I missed kissing him, I missed kissing him so damn much.

#sorry for ze long rant #i just wanted to let you whos reading this know that I love you! #every part of you! #zsakuva #sakuverse #asmr #andrew #andrew marston #hair is looking gorjus but my pockets hurt from buying hair products😭

[torhues]

iwaizumi hajime.

iwaizumi made it clear when you broke up with him— that you wouldn't get together— as if it wasn't an unspoken rule already. you weren't so sure of his words but, pride had your conscience in its hands and you agreed, saying you wouldn't even think about doing that.

now you're sitting in a fancy cake shop in Florence, with iwaizumi in front of you. the last time you saw him was in highschool, when you broke up with him on the way to airport, when he said the two of you would be just fine even in a long distance relationship, when you said it was hard for you, when he asked whether you trust him, and when you said you do but it had started to shake.

the last time you saw him was around five years ago, see you don't even remember the timeline. you've been keeping a blurry image of him walking away as a souvenir for your eyes failed to give you a clearer look back then.

the orders are sitting on the table but you don't care enough to tend to them. on other days, you would take a picture— multiple pictures— send it to your friends, post it on your social media account if you feel like it, make it another insignificant moment of your life saved in the gallery. on other days, you would enjoy the dessert but today, the pear sauce on vanilla bread seems to reduce your appetite.

"i can't believe we're meeting all the way here, in Italy," albeit, he seems to enjoy his cake.

you imagined meeting him in California or Japan, or somewhere in Canada, at most, since he always wanted to visit the country, especially during fall, and coincidently, you've enrolled in the fall course for post-graduate studies, at some university. not Italy, not in the middle of your vacation that was supposed to be some sort of self-sobriety programme.

you nod. "me neither,"

and then he starts talking about college, what he has been up to recently, directing the same questions to you while you do your best to give a brief response. it isn't the timing that is making you feel out of place but instead, it's how normal iwaizumi is. you don't expect an argument, not an iwaizumi who can never forget you for your impromptu breakup and, neither the one who would ask you to get back together because living without you feels like hell,

like diving deep into the ocean without oxygen.

you don't want to have a melodramatic conversation but, you don't want him to act like you didn't leave him with loose ends, as if you didn't hurt him when all he ever did was make you happy. you want him to hate you, to utter all the words along the lines of love and loathe, to tell you that he loved you and still did, that it was so hard to move on and every breath pierced like glass shards in the heart, that he spent nights crying while reading your texts knowing you'd never come back and when he has been doing better finally, you appear in his life like nothing ever happened, and drag him back to step one. you want him to tell you things that resonate with the yearning you have for him in his heart, desperately beautiful yet painful, so that you don't have to ask yourself over and over again, am i the only one who still feels this way?

"how's life?" you ask this once, instead of letting him ask all the questions that you don't have a definite answer to.

iwaizumi pauses, he takes a breath, a look out of the glass windows, your eyes follow his gaze, there's a soft smile on his face.

iwaizumi lifts up his fingers. "i'm engaged," he's engaged. "and it'd be appreciated if you could make it to the wedding next month," and he's inviting you to his wedding next month.

he continues about how suddenly things happened and how sorry he is for not being able to invite you to the engagement; you don't mind any of it, quite frankly. you didn't even expect him to do that after changing your number. that's not what you're worried about, that is not even the worst part.

iwaizumi is engaged.

the sixteen year old boy who told you that he'd marry you the moment you both turn eighteen, the eighteen year old guy who promised to stay by your side— one who shared his firsts with you and swore to make you his last— is engaged. your heart is racing at a thousand miles per second, and for all the wrong reasons.

now that you notice, his smile has gotten wider, and he's talking about the girl he met in college and how she makes him feel like the happiest person ever. you notice the way he still fiddles with his fingers while talking about someone or something that he adores, the way he says those words with eyes that seem like they would never run out of love to give. the sunset shines upon him, he looks exactly the way he did on your first date.

do you smile the same way at her?

you know, you're in no place to complain, for you were the one to leave him when he begged you to say. it's not that you don't want him to move on in life, you said he deserved someone better the day you broke up, it still rings in your head as a reminder of your biggest mistake. you want to happy for him but, something about him moving on and you being stuck in the same place leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.

"yn," he calls your name, you respond by shifting your eyes in his direction. "are you listening?" you are, albeit, you don't know how much you're processing.

you're picturing them together, doing everything you did with him; holding hands, going on dates, kissing, hugging, sleeping next to each other, movie nights that felt ever so intimate— you imagine her sharing every little memory but one that's a better version. you feel as if yo—

"if i ask you to get back with me, would you?" you ask, letting the words you've been suppressing for so long flow like water in a stream, one that could potentially flood everything around.

"yn, i'm engaged—"

"i mean, had you not been engaged and had i asked you to get back together," you clarify, "would you have agreed?"

there's a pause, a series of silence, strings of regret, traces of shared memories from the past that fill the little gaps in the air like blood in sinusoids. you remember your first fight with iwaizumi, and you want to know what he's thinking. it's not like you can tell, you forgot how to do that long ago. iwaizumi rarely ever looks disappointed or upset enough to give you a silent treatment. for a second, you think it's that, but it turns out you're wrong.

he doesn't look sad or angry, not disappointed at your question considering he's about to get married. instead, iwaizumi looks like he's hurting. as if he has waited for long, hoping to catch a glance of you somewhere even if it's in middle of a crowd because it's fine, that works. he can always reach you out amidst a crowd. iwaizumi looks like he doesn't have a definite answer to your question, but he is telling you that it's your fault.

a second passes and his phone rings. your eyes fall upon the caller ID, it's a name with a heart, you think it's her. it has to be, because iwaizumi, without sparing you a second glance, stands up, and puts on his coat, ready to leave. the little hope of getting an answer to that question goes off the moment he picks up his phone, or maybe even before that, because it doesn't look like iwaizumi has an answer to that.

but he stops. "no," he says.

and you realise, to him, you're the memory he buried deep in his mind while to you, iwaizumi is the air you struggle to breathe.

#♡ hues'. #♡ handmade. #iwaizumi x reader #haikyuu x reader #iwaizumi hajime #haikyuu #haikyuu fic #iwaizumi fic #haikyuu angst #iwaizumi angst #haikyuu drabbles #iwaizumi drabble #haikyuu headcanons #iwaizumi headcanons #haikyuu iwaizumi #my god what is this . #i swear this sounded better in my head #like rlly

[kingofthering]

I was thinking about the forced coming out au and how @moonshynecybin said Marc would keep blowing Vale out hot & cold and I had thoughts for one of the hot days.

Essentially, it's about the two of them getting invited to an LGBTQ event -thinking a gala/fundraiser situation maybe- (could be towards the end of June for pride month or later in the year depending on the timeline, details).

I think this kind of event could truly be double-edged for Marc because everyone is telling him that they admire him for what he did and that he's helping change things and that so many kids are gonna feel encouraged by this and— well, on the one side it makes Marc feel sick of their lie because he didn't come out for ~the good reasons™️ (didn't even really choose to come out, even) but the event also makes him realize that in the grand scheme of things, he is (they are) having an impact on so many people.

Anyway, for once Marc's brain decides to let him focus on the good aspect of things and he lets himself be close to Valentino that night, invites him to dance, lean his head on his shoulder, hold onto his arm when they're speaking to people together, kissing his cheek before he leaves Valentino's side to grab them drinks, etc etc

Valentino— Valentino is surprised in ways he didn't expect. He's essentially been begging Marc to provide more efforts in their whole charade and yes, he's happy to have Marc cooperating but also he had forgotten how tender Marc could be with him and that's something to process as well. He used to be scared of those moments back when they were just friends with benefits in their early years [obviously not the PDA but the softs moments after they had fucked, Valentino letting Marc linger in his bed when he would have already thrown away any other hook-up, Marc kissing his cheek before leaving his motorhome, Marc having a coffee for him when they had to attend safety meetings together, Marc dusting off feathers of Valentino's suit on stage, etc etc]. Scared because he couldn't let this 20-something insane fast boy think this was more than unserious sex and scared because Valentino was into it [no, home boy is not that self aware but just a bit, you know].

Anyway, they have a great night and in the taxi to their hotel, Marc has his hand laying in the middle seat and Valentino grabs it, squeezes it and asks Marc if he had a great time tonight. Marc squeezes back and nods [this is a very self-indulgent moment in the midst of an otherwise pretty angsty universe, bye].

Obviously they were booked a single room with a king bed and they find each other in the huge bathroom, both facing the mirror and getting ready for bed. Then, it's Marc asking Vale to help him undo the knot of his tie. It's Valentino offering his wrists to Marc so he can undo his cufflinks. It's the two of them being in each other's space, suppressing the room between them inch by inch until Marc just has to tilt his head up to find Valentino's mouth with his own.

It's achingly slow, at first. It reminds Valentino of the kiss they shared earlier that night on the dance floor. Despite their audience, it hadn't felt performative back then, not really. Now that they are without an audience, Valentino feels even more exposed.

They sleep together (sex so sweet it could actually make teeth rot) and fall asleep wrapped around each other. The next morning, Valentino wakes up in cold sheet and a handwritten note that says :

changed my flight to get home earlier see you in [wherever their next race is] Marc

#rpf #4693 #forced coming out au #my writing #and then marc is obviously back to flinching when vale touches him and it's like they are starting from point 0 all over again