#theme: anguish

[araekni]

Faulty, Leila Chatti (insp. by @heavensghost)

#words #art #textile #mine #original #leila chatti #image described #image description in alt text #topic: grief #theme: of course we will hurt each other #theme: dysfunction #theme: anguish #my art

[araekniarchive]

eve, after the fall (auguste rodin; bronze, 1883)

Mark Twain, The Diaries of Adam and Eve // Hozier, From Eden // Angela Carter, The Bloody Chamber // Frank Bidart, The War of Vaslav Nijinsky // Eagles, The Last Resort // Anne Sexton, Words for Dr. Y

#webs #web weaving #requests #mine #bit of an experimental one so lmk if you like the style #theme: eden #theme: shame #theme: anguish #theme: grief #theme: religion #theme: loss #theme: rejection #theme: tragedy #thanks to @shadowoftheraven15 for the request!! i know it was a couple months ago but i hope you still like it <3 #auguste rodin #mark twain #hozier #angela carter #frank bidart #eagles #anne sexton #this is a reproduction in bronze; the original is in white marble but im gonna be real with you. i felt this one more. idk why #RIP I POSTED THIS ON THE WRONG BLOG FIRST

[poisonousquinzel]

sorry but if you actually think Cancel Culture ™ is a thing then you're kinda a dumb fuck. Cancel culture isn't real, holding people accountable for their actions is a thing, but this whole narrative around Canceling that's evolved over the past few years isn't real. It's never been an actual thing. Its just a fear mongering tactic to further vilify the groups who were being harmed in the first place and victimize the person who did something wrong.

Your fav being called out for playing an antisemitic video game that directly gives profits to a hugely influential TERF, who's said openly she sees getting profits / royalty cheques from her franchise as endorsements for her bigotry, is not "cancel culture". It's called the consequences for your actions.

You have every right to do and play whatever the fuck you want, but that goes both ways. If you go out of your way to build up and financially support these people who're openly advocating to take away trans people's rights, then you get to deal with people not trusting you because of it. You get to deal with trans and Jewish folks not feeling safe around you, not wanting to be around you or not wanting to talk to you. Because you have shown that you care more about nostalgia and temporary personal emotional gratification over the wellbeing and safety of those communities in the real world.

People have explained why supporting HL is wrong, people have explained why it's harmful, people have explained in detail the issues with this situation. You. Just. Don't. Care. You don't listen, or read, because in the end, you can't be bothered enough to put in the effort of having 1 moment of critical thinking.

It's not that folks don't have arguments or evidence, it's that it clearly does not matter to you. It's that the value of an antisemitic game full of one horrific thing after another is worth more to you than the real, living breathing people who are going to be, and have been, affected by this.

You come across as a bad person. Not because some person on Twitter determined you must be, but because your actions speak far louder. And they're screaming red flags.

I'm not going to argue with you over your own bad decisions and life choices. You've made your bed and are mad that people are telling you to lie in it.

#not dc #i need to not focus on this but it makes me so annoyed #and like the constant 'well hp has been a comfort thing of mine since childhood!' like bitch do you think Harry Potter was a niche little #thing???? #a fucking lot of us had Harry Potter as something important to us growing up #i remember getting all the legos sets for Christmas in 2011. getting the lego video games and i loved them! #but. that. doesn't. matter. #we're not children anymore and she's not on our side. #JKR made it clear that a large portion of her previous fan base are not welcome around her and that frankly #that she would rather them be dead. #she's a horrendous human being who is causing so much pain and anguish for communities that're just trying to exist #and its built upon the empire she crafted. the one full of stereotypes and offensive imagery and tone-deaf themes. #we aren't kids anymore and it's shameful to gloss over what she is actively doing Right Now because You have fond memories of her world. #a lot of people don't get the luxury of pretending like she's not an awful person because they're the ones she's harming #they're the ones she's spreading hateful rhetoric and stereotypes about. the ones that she's pushing to get their rights taken away. #just put down her shitty fuckhng series and read another book. #i promise you there's hundreds upon hundreds of better ones out there with better plots and better world building. #anti harry potter #anti jkr #anti hogwarts legacy #tw transphobia mention #tw antisemitism mention #figure I'll tw tag just in case ya got it filtered 💖

[spearxwind]

Help i cant stop listening to the PW soundtrack I'm obsessed

#its not my fault it fucks harder than diamond #got me replaying 'kings' on loop like my life depends on it fr #thunderclap #if ur a fan of epic videogame osts give it a try its so good #THE MOTIFS GOING OFF THE THEME DUETS THE ANGUISH OF THE OPENING AND CLOSING #And now knowing ofc what's happening during this too makes me go AUUUGGHHHHH #WAILINGGGGG #AND KNOWING CORONATION COMES RIGHT AFTER TOO. MAN....... #musicposting #its so fucked up i cant talk about this with anyone bc none of my friends played it and i need to go off about it so bad #i WILL be using it as oc soundtracks. when i make an ost playlist for broken horizon itll be like 60% just the project wingman soundtrack #AND WHAT ABOUT IT!!!! ITS GOOD FLIGHT MUSIC!!!!

[heraldofcrow]

My current writing moodboard 👍

#depressedness #i literally cannot believe i have to write chapter five of this fic #i have been dreading this chapter from the start #it’s the most brutal sequence in the whole damn story lmao #“hey guys it’s totally not a needless massacre of innocents!! they’re not really human!! they’re subhuman!!” #how did THAT end up being the overarching theme??? #miyazaki is a cruel genius #he knew *exactly* what type of history he was referencing with this shit #this sucks lmao #i mean don’t get me wrong #my gothic horror loving self quite enjoys the anguish but i feel bad for a couple of my more wholesome mutuals #you guys are too sweet to be sharing this with 💀 #i mean it is bloodborne #but still #i hope you all forgive me #writing stuff #christened in blood #CrowNotes

[k-i-l-l-e-r-b-e-e-6-9]

𝔊𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔴𝔥𝔬𝔯𝔢 - ℭ𝔥𝔞𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔅𝔢𝔩𝔩𝔰 𝔬𝔣 𝔉𝔲𝔫𝔢𝔯𝔞𝔩 𝔄𝔫𝔤𝔲𝔦𝔰𝔥

#Goatwhore #Funeral Dirge for the Rotting Sun #Chanting Bells of Funeral Anguish #Full-length #Release date: #July 21st #2003 #Genre: #Black/Death/Thrash Metal #Themes: #Satanism #Darkness #Anti-religion #Armageddon #USA

[everymlmhybrid]

this part genuinely makes me feel like eating dry wall like i can't explain how i feel about it without making some of you finally tire of me and block me about it i think

#.txt #reservoir dogs - #sorry for just randomly posting clips . i was actually working on my vid i swear but then i started Thinking. and here we are. #anyways going genuinely insane in the tags . i'm so sorry. -> #(im only sorry for the sheer amount of tags or if u disagree w/ my interpretations / headcanons. if ur just annoyed lmfao sucks to be you!) #anyways. you guys ever think abt the way orange HAS TO know white's lying to him abt his odds of survival. #bc i think abt that genuinely constantly. all the time thinking about it. #also the ''joe's gonna get you 100% again'' -> first of all . lol. second of all -> ''he was the only one i wasn't 100% on'' hello? HELLO!! #also freddy's voice here makes me feel like punching walls . like it makes me wail in anguish. #no but yeah i think abt the theme of lying & the fact some of the first lies we hear are in this scene in a way #also this part is leaning wayyy harder on headcanon but i always think. like if orange WASNT lying abt who he is. then it'd be reasonable #forhim to not know how likely he is to die and/or how blatantly larry's lying (''i'm talking days!'') but as a cop he SOOO knows he's fcked #but like . what's he gonna do. ''hey i know that's bullshit'' like obviously not and partly bc of How he knows but also bc like #you just don't argue with the only guy who's caring for you while you're seemingly on the brink of death!! LMAO #and certainly not when he's the only one telling you you'll be fine!! even if he's just bullshitting you so you don't freak out!! #I DON'T KNOW i go kinda insane about this scene . as . you can tell. #if you too are insane about this and the implications . don't worry. in several months. my fic will feed you. you will see. #idk . larry lying to and/or for him <33333333 kinda makes me go insane. kinda makes me go wild. #idk. i should be getting ready for bed rn. WHATEVER. bye. logging off. if you read all these i'm in love with you okay #i've just been turngin them around in my head like a microwave for hours so i needed to infodump or else i would explode i think

[mechieonu]

just finished good omens s2. i'm in so much fucking pain and agony

#EVERYONE shut the FUCK UP #it's all abt LISTEN and NO NIGHTINGALES and WE COULD'VE BEEN US #IT'S ABT THE BREATHLESS DESPERATE WAY CROWLEY WRENCHES HIM FORWARD TO KISS HIM #IT'S ABT THE BETRAYAO OF AZIRA SUGGESTING THE BOTH OF THEM BE ANGELS WHEN THEY BOTH KNOW WHAT HEAVEN'S DONE TO THE BOTH OF THEM #IT'S ABT THAT STUPID FUCKING BOBBLEHEAD AND HOW HE PROBABLY DRUGGED THAT STUPID FUCKING COFFEE #(and me screaming internally at azira to never accept a drink from a strange man—IT'S CLUB ETIQUETTE‚ ANGEL) #it's abt the music. god. #the variation of the theme from the s1 church scene where crowley saved the books‚ you know the one #it plays for gabriel and beelzebub. & it plays again when azira comes back to the bookshop #delighted and giddy to tell crowley the 'good news' #IT'S ABT HOW WE'RE A TEAM. A GROUP. A GROUP OF THE TWO OF US #AND HOW CROWLEY CHOKES UP WHEN HE SAYS HE'S SICK OF PRETENDING THAT THEY AREN'T #its abt how i am definitely lying awake never sleeping again #& how I FORGIVE YOU and DON'T BOTHER is banging pots and pans in my head at all cylinders #i just. god. they love each other so much. they're so FUCKING STUPID and i LOVE THEM but i'm LITERALLY in the deepest pits of agony #i'm in the deepest trench of anguish i can't fucking do this #good omens #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #gos2 spoilers #go2 spoilers

[clowndensation]

quite literally one of my favorite things about louis in the books is that he projects all the anger he feels at god directly onto lestat.

like god is great and all powerful and all knowing, but god is also an indiscriminate killer; a killer who would have paul take his own life, even though he was devout and moral and good, while keeping louis on this earth (even if he's none of those things. even if he's the one who gave paul the proverbial push over the edge of that balcony). everything in the world is part of god's plan, but god is withholding, god won't share that plan with his children, even if they beg, even if they pray, and so louis is left alone, abandoned by god. and he can't hate god, because god is above reproach, but he has all this anger and this grief, and he has nowhere to put it.

and then he meets lestat. lestat who promises to transform him, to make him something new. god promises to care for your immortal soul, but lestat offers louis an immortal body. god can turn water into wine, but lestat can turn human into vampire. god forces louis to argue with his brother - an argument that kills him, and lestat forces louis to kill a man before he'll turn him into a vampire. humanity is made in god's image, but louis abandons humanity, and lestat remakes him in his own.

louis gives up god for the promise of rebirth, for the promise of new life filled with new meaning. but, of course, there's no such thing as leaving your old life behind, and ghosts don't stop haunting you just because you've died. and so louis gave up a god who was out of reach, who knew everything but would tell him nothing, and what he received in return was a god who he could finally speak with, but who had no answers to give him. and he can't accept it. so all the anger louis has at god is now anger he has at lestat, but at least now god is a man he can touch, who he can yell at, who he can resent without apology. lestat is a killer, lestat will see the brightest in humanity, the people most worthy of life, and snuff them out. lestat promises knowledge and answers, but cruelly withholds them. lestat is his creator, but he's a bad one, an uncaring one, a maker who refuses to take responsibility for what he's put on this earth.

and this resentment grows and grows and grows, until there's only one way louis can possibly handle this continuous failing of god. claudia knows it, and louis agrees. and so they kill god.

and nothing changes! nothing changes, nothing improves, and life is still just as miserable and achingly deprived of meaning, and it's not until louis finally talks about his fear out loud (that there is no god, that life only has as much meaning as we decide to give it, that even if god isn't real, good and evil are, and louis has made himself evil all on his own) that he fully accepts that he was punishing lestat for the crime of not measuring up to god - the exact crime louis punishes himself for. and so now louis is alive in a world bereft of both god and lestat. and he just has to cope with that.

#and then lestat comes back etc etc but i'm not THERE YET so i get to gnaw on this headspace for a little while. #literally dynamic of all time #the show tackles religious themes too but they subsume a LOT of this into other metaphors. #lestat as the father for instance is something i think is given a lot more emphasis over lestat as god #which is fitting because so much of louis's anguish over god is transferred to this anguish over family in the show #he has less a crisis of faith and more a crisis of isolation #both in the sort of abstract sense of him as a human having a family he can't truly be close to because of who he is #to the literal sense of becoming a vampire and losing the possibility of family (seen come to a head in his episode 3 breakdown) #and then he tries to remedy that with claudia #only to have it break down on him because even though he WANTS family #he doesn't really know how to maintain it beyond the fantasy he has in his head about this family unit who all love and accept each other #anyways there's an entire other essay to be had about louis's relationship with lestat and what it represents in the show #but it's all very... hehe <3 #iwtv

[araekniarchive]

Selected excerpts of Disco Elysium (2019), created by Robert Kurvitz and Aleksander Rostov

#webs #web weaving #excerpts #disco elysium #disco elysium spoilers #robert kurvitz #aleksander rostov #mine #sorry i've been so shit at doing anything on this blog recently; was really burning out at the end of term but we broke up friday #and i am just about alive enough to make something again #also i spent four of those five days binging this game so. have the bits that reached thru the screen and punched me in the face #theme: anguish #theme: love #theme: of course we will hurt each other #theme: truth #theme: beauty #theme: grief #theme: memory #theme: haunting

[doublekanble]

ghost in your home was not supposed to end like that at all lol, wrestled with the idea of letting him have his cake and eat it too or shove it in his face a bit more and ended up with just letting him be

#/kbtalk #combine the symbols from the three plant mentioned (gardenia. ficus. begonia) and you got what it takes to keep a good relationship #if youre reading this and you want to know. one of the end was first step to reconciliation but i think that wouldve been too nice to him #maybe some other day ill do a rewrite/exploration of the concept bc i think a lot about- #the anguish of mourning someone who sit at your dinner table everyday #i think he would've been a bit more conceited and “hmp its not my fault” but youre from the time where he can only get by with a smile- #and a charming silver tongue so it balances out rlly #i shove the ghost theme last minute because i was going back and forth on what to titled the section and i remember the 21 grams soul theor #added like an extra 1k bc of it and ended up going back over the whole thing to put some more stuff in #brain is finally clearing up and i hope you cant tell when in the writing did that happen lol #next fic needs me to read a 200pg book about voodoo so i can set up one scenario ive been putting it off for some times now #for now im blasting too sweet and making a minecraft house #i need to download mods that give me a radio so i can make an alastor theme room soon

[kreachvera]

ohhh zappa. my beloved zappa. my good friend zappa guilty gear.

#i want to see her happy #and yet #her anguish. is very fun to draw #sorry girl! your themes are banging #thoughtz

[siliconforbrains]

I decided to do a full loop (companion side quests included) this time around and Siffrin's obvious desperation when Bonnie says he shouldn't have jumped in to protect them back when he lost his eye... Siffrin is never really going to recover from the end of act 3, are they?

#maxisrambling #max plays isat #isat spoilers #siffrin would fight the Universe itself to protect bonnie #also #siffrins internal anguish every time the theme of origins and home come up (like during odile's side quest)... man

[shroom-gloom]

swap au wip stuff

childhood friends fight to the death with garden shears <3

#my own art #will probably delete once i finish maybe #gore #tw gore #tw blood #blood #its not particularly graphic but tagging just in case #tbh i just wanted to draw short hair nene <3 #sry for beating them up but i like to see my blorbos in pain and anguish #also gonna rant for a min #been seeing some of the most dogshit takes in the fandom lately #i have brainrot so i could just be in way deeper than most others #but it seems like so many of yall have a really surface level understanding of the story and its themes #most of it seems to be coming from twitter so i think i should take this as a sign to stop using it ahhaaghhh #gotta remind myself that other peoples interpretation of the story does not effect me #but god i take psychic damage when i read some of these takes ouugh #take this all with a grain of salt tho because im sure my personal interpretations of the charas/story are not all that accurate either #but at least i dont state it as fact and argue with people who disagree on twitter <3 #that iceberg pic makes me want to rip my teeth out #whoever created the iceberg video format deserves to be lit on fire

[bestworstcase]

lying on the floor thinking abt how ironwood embodied and was corrupted by the ugliest characteristics of the god of light; the desire for absolute control, the latent hostility and disdain for human emotion, the absolute inability to see beyond his own designs for the world and his perceived creations—even ironwood’s obsessive single-minded focus on getting penny on a leash no matter the cost echoes the way light responded each time salem defied him—

& like. ozpin is absent throughout v7 but oscar devotes most of his time on screen to prying ironwood away from that path, with negligible success—there’s the beginning of a turn after jacques’ arrest, yes, but by the end of the volume it’s crystal clear that ironwood went for the “tell the truth, protect and rally mantle” plan because it made him feel in control of the situation again and the instant cinder and salem shattered that illusion of control, he recoiled from it and lashed out at the allies he perceived as having tricked him into letting his guard down—and ozpin doesn’t return until oscar’s effort in this regard has finally and irrevocably failed. which keeps sticking in my brain as important, particularly in light of watts in 6.4 saying that ozpin is the only person who stood a chance of getting through to ironwood.

(sidebar i think watts was being overly pessimistic there, about the possibility of ozpin foiling them by talking sense into ironwood. even before ozpin died and ironwood entered his fascism death spiral, ironwood marched into an allied kingdom with his armada in tow without so much as a courtesy warning, chafed openly when ozpin declined to blindly deploy that armada on the basis of hearsay from a fifteen year old kid, politically stabbed ozpin in the back by freezing him out of his own council, and throughout it all moped about ozpin not trusting him enough. like,, lmao)

and then of course there’s the fact that atlas was specifically a project that ironwood and ozpin shared—and atlas itself is and has always been used narratively as a symbol for the hollow promises, failures, and illusory progress of the post-war society ozma designed—and the entire story up to this point was a slow inexorable build towards the fall of atlas.

it just seems like a microcosm of what’s going on with ozma and the god of light and the divine mandate? in that ozma’s loyalty to the gods (or at minimum, the inertia of his original loyalty to them) feels reflected in his choice of ironwood to guard the relic of creation and shepherd the floating city meant to represent the ideals ozma thinks humanity needs to achieve to earn salvation—he picks a champion who resembles the god of light himself!—and then, when the budding tyrant he trusted spins around to shoot him he’s not even present to—like his self-imposed isolation inside oscar’s head renders him powerless to even try to change this situation for the better! ozpin later claims that he was secretly there all along, but the only times he resurfaces are when oscar is in immediate mortal peril so i’m not sure that i buy that, at least not in the sense of ozpin having full conscious awareness of what was happening around oscar throughout v7; but either way, his miserable isolation blinded him to the developing crisis—either literally or willfully—and he roused himself just a little too late to prevent catastrophe. again.

(gestures vaguely at lost fable, at ozma trying so hard to have it both ways with salem, to be with the apostate and manipulate her into serving the gods so he wouldn’t have to choose, for years and years and years until his lies and passivity metastasized and they destroyed each other, gestures vaguely at the v5-6 promising not to lie in one breath and immediately lying again in the next, until his secrets got squeezed out of him by the avatar of knowledge who palpably holds him in disdain and his house of cards imploded in his face; also gestures vaguely at ozma the heroic knight errant who faced down an army alone to save one person, and how thousands of years have whittled him down to a morally bankrupt shell of what he was and how that slow putrefaction of his character has been driven every step of the way by refusal to act in some form or another. waves hands it’s about the paralysis of being caught between his conscience and his god-given task)

anyway

i think a normal amt about the blinding of rapunzel’s prince and the exile in the desert and the restoration of his sight when she finds him there

ANYWAY, with the way things are resolved re: ozpin’s return in v8 and the fall of atlas having set the stage, narratively, for a massive paradigm shift in the immediate future and the kids who didn’t fall being in vacuo now—kingdom of destruction, presumable home of the maiden whose fairytale theme is “dont view the world at a distance, take an active part in it,” and the place where eighty years ago ozma won a war with a magical sword nuke and sculpted the world into what it is now, stagnant rotting husk of his ideals that it is—on top of the structural change in salem’s role in v7-8… i just. i just,,

hhhhhh

#NOT TO MENTION #salem has creation + knowledge in her hands now #the *storytelling* qualities #plus the likelihood that she ordered cinder not to go to amity #BECAUSE she wanted it intact for some reason #e.g. intending to use it herself later #and the strong theme in her arc #of the power storytellers have to shape reality #(in a story SHE IS THE NARRATOR OF!!) #like . . . #if rwby is gonna put a spin on #rapunzel’s anguish healing her lover’s sight #after she finds him wandering lost in the desert #um. now is the time and the set up for it is RIGHT THERE #i feel deranged

[iruiion]

#so a lot of the ost is atmospheric. cinematic. it makes total sense for there to be a few simple melodies & a lot of sequences with chords #and echoing silences. right. #but the travelers' theme is pretty lyrical #it should be interesting & feasible to play. like on piano or guitar or something. right. #right . <-CLUELESS. CLUELESS #NO !!!!! IT"S ALL JUST. like half of this shit is just vacillating between two notes the entire fucking song. and then some other #part would get the theme. AND EVEN THEN the theme is extremely simple. auuuu #i don't know what i expected. #Fuuuuck. like it sounds AWESOME really it does but it's not interesting to /play/ do you get it #outer wilds #anguished. angruished . anguished. i love videos game did you know that #forgot to mention. when i say 'absolutely fuckall' i mean simple melodies;chords;mostly silence; and sequences of two vacillating notes