#theme: fear
araekni · 5 months ago
requests: starting your adult life, confused, afraid and don't know what to do
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Mitski, First Love/Late Spring
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Lorde, Ribs
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Andy Muschetti (x)
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John Steinbeck, East of Eden
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Liana Finck for The New Yorker
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John Green, Turtles All The Way Down
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Mitski, Two Slow Dancers
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Raleigh Ritchie, Big and Scared
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Roman Elrich (x)
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Bo Burnham, 30
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Taylor Swift, Never Grow Up
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Sylvia Plath, Witch Burning
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Mitski, Class of 2013
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rpmusings-galore · 7 months ago
          heartbeat too quick, 
                    breath shallow  
                                 i can hear them coming. closer.                                      if they find me, then all is lost. 
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bthump · 27 days ago
Sorry if this ask deals with kind of a heavy topic. I know your take on the SA during the eclipse is that it was unnecessary and done in a less than elegant way. I agree. Do you think that it would have made more sense if it would have been done to Guts than Casca? In what ways do you think it would have changed what happens after the eclipse?
Hm, in some ways I think it would've actually made less sense, honestly.
Femto raping Casca feels tacked on evil for the sake of evil, an act you can read meaning into just because so much of Berserk revolves around rape, but which is not depicted in a way that imparts a sense of meaning and weight. It's depicted as exploitatively and gratuitously as possible, and the fall-out is not grounded in realism, it's thematically muddy, and even contradicts earlier parts of the story. Finally the only real purpose it serves is to write Casca out of the story for a long time and motivate the actual main character, which sucks a whole lot.
So on the one hand Femto raping Guts instead would've improved on some of this. It probably would've been depicted more tastefully and less like hentai, it would've happened to the main character and therefore not be an instance of fridging for the sake of manpain, and the consequences would probably be much more realistic because Guts would still have to be a functioning character afterwards. It would probably also feel more thematically and emotionally impactful as a direct echo of Guts' csa trauma and the fear that motivates him, and because we would see him actually dealing with the aftermath.
On the other hand, imo it doesn't work from Griffith's point of view, and would fundamentally change his story and pretty much his entire character arc. Griffith made the sacrifice to escape his feelings for Guts, it was Griffith choosing the dream over Guts in the tragic climax of the story, which was perfectly built up to. So if Femto then turns around and, rather than going "haha I have no feelings anymore" he instead demonstrates the twisted, evil version of those feelings, well, it's a whole different story. Now it's Griffith succumbing to evil predatory gay feelings instead of trying to escape positive genuine good gay feelings. In canon Guts' rage and betrayal was based in his feelings of abandonment and longing for Griffith's attention, and this would change that too.
The thing that would really bug me here is that it would be super homophobic - not inherently for including a m/m rape scene, but because all the thematic build up to it would essentially spell out 'gays really are predatory and evil' lol. Granted the actual Eclipse is already not great in that regard, but yk, I do think it's very significant to the depiction of Griffith and Guts' relationship that Griffith/Femto/NGriff's biggest cruelty to Guts is tossing him aside and pretending to be over him, rather than directing evil predatory attention towards him. It just fundamentally changes the whole emotional and thematic impact of their relationship and the subtext inherent to it if it ends with rape instead of abandonment, yk?
(Also I want to clarify here, this doesn't mean I think rapey eclipse AU fanfic or whatever is bad or anything like that, both bc I hold professionally published works to a different standard and because you can't expect fanfic to be a commentary on the original's subtext, it's its own thing.)
Anyway I actually responded to a similar ask a while ago and I want to link it to answer the question of what would change after the Eclipse, because I think that answer's still good, and I mostly just wanted to expand on my take on how it would and wouldn't work in canon here.
Thanks for the ask!
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beidoubeloved · a year ago
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[the weight of a single piece of paper, the weight on my shoulders]
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gayarsonist · 2 months ago
the scariest thing about making art is when you start to see parts of yourself in it and you're like oooooookay maybe we're cutting out our heart and painting the pages with it a little TOO much! nobody can ever see this! and then publishing it anyway
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businessbois · 9 months ago
i feel like a good amount of people haven’t seen this clip and it’s a damn shame
(context: the dream team side went to tubbo’s jungle base early before the war was set to start and before the l’manburg side was on. tubbo was alerted of this by george getting an achievement in chat. he shoved everything he’d prepared into his enderchest right before they got there)
[Tubbo quickly puts diamond armor in his enderchest as he takes damage. He puts the last of it in right before he dies.] Tubbo: “Yep, there we go. We got it all in the chest, boys! We got it in the chest! Oh my god, we actually did it! Take the L! You can’t get jack! You can’t get jack! Ooh, ooh, you wearing your armor? You wearing your armor, are you? Ooh, you wearing your fancy armor, are you? Oh, oh, this is unfortunate. Oh, what, you gonna kill me?” [Tubbo_ was shot by Sapnap using [Sap LazerBeam]] Oh no, have I died again? Oh. Oh, that’s a shame.” [throws harming potions at them and then dies] “Oh, that’s a shame. KEKW, boys. KEKW. The clowns! Absolute clowns. Absolute clowns!” [Tubbo_ was shot by GeorgeNotFound. He respawns and breaks his bed] “Absolute clowns. Go on, you—go on. Kill me. Kill me. Where will I end up, eh? Where will I end up?” [Tubbo_ was slain by Sapnap using [Sapnap’s Schlong]] “Oh?” [He respawns] “And now we’re back at spawn. Onwards to L’Manburg, boys! Onwards to L’Manburg! You think they have crap on us? Oh look, they’re now 12 thousand blocks away and we are going to L’Manburg.”
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cryptiqish · 3 months ago
holy shit that omitb finale..
was right about some things, wrong about others and god saw me say tim kono could get it and laughed in my face by making me watch That elevator scene, but overall that was such a BANGER episode and this is one of the best shows out this year
i can’t stop thinking about the hardy boys and tim’s death, though - with all that we know now, there’s something so deliciously tragic about the complete story of those four. the impact of zoe's death is obvious. she dies, oscar is framed - and tim is stuck between betrayal and protecting himself and - more importantly - mabel. he can't tell mabel, either. he ruins years and years of friendship to keep her safe. mabel, as far as she knows, has lost three of her closest friends for reasons she won't ever properly understand, and won't find closure for another 10 years. she still doesn't know it was to protect her. we're even told it turns her to a shell of her former self.
and we know, in those ten years, tim is filled with so much guilt he works to bring down the dimases in secret, and continues to isolate himself to do it. he doesn't have friends, not anymore - less and less by choice. we see on the tox report he's on antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds.
and that's the thing: it's the loneliness that leads him to jan - who yes, turns out to be insane, but even then, doesn't know about the jewels or the dimases or zoe. it's the loneliness he thinks he has to have, to protect mabel and to pull this off for the friends he still cares deeply about, if his actions and hardy boys novels say anything. it's the loneliness that sets off that domino effect that leads to his death.
the tragedy is that he's killed just before he gets everything he worked for - atonement for the past ten years. the ring, evidence to convict the dimases, justice for oscar, everything: but more importantly, being able to connect with mabel and oscar, make amends, connect again finally who he was before, explain everything. i don't think it was a coincidence he broke up with jan, implied to be shortly after he found the ring. jan is that loneliness. the hardy boys were the ones she was infuriated at being second to, even if she didn't know it. he was so close, only for the object that finally lets him try to fix everything, lets him reconnect to be the thing that gets him killed.
and i think mabel understands that, somehow: but it hurts. after zoe's death, after ten years, after oscar's out of prison, there might have been a glimmer of hope to rebuild the hardy boys, heal as best as they could. they never got to do that. but maybe, they were close.
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dykejaskiers · 3 months ago
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countdown to halloween [1/7] ✟ the fear street trilogy
I don’t fear the devil. I fear the neighbour who would accuse me. I fear the mother that would watch her daughter hang. I fear Union. They lead us like lambs to slaughter and expect us to just follow. They will see: I am no lamb. If they want a witch… I will give them a witch.
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mcmoth · a month ago
If I may ramble about c!emerald duo for a bit.... theres just something about how they place their hypothetical ideals ('sending a message'/'returning the favor') over actual realistic consequences. A show of their disconnect with the rest of humanity, and how along the line they've developed maybe even a 'formula' of sorts, of dealing with people. Also about how this sort of prioritisation of shallow ideals is no different than the items and places that they so condemn people for valuing in the end. But they've lived such long lives, people coming and passing, that they've long stopped seeing it from another point of view.
They may not have places or materialistic things to worry about protecting, but that's because their lives are not mortal. Mortal people create legacies to outlive them, to create a mark in the world. They've forgotten that. They've forgotten how it feels to be young and vulnerable and clinging for meaning in a life that's still so fresh, so finite. How it feels to be weak and unprotected and seek a home that you could live out the rest of your days in, safe, because for them, no homes do last. But for mortals they do. They should. They've forgotten how valuable are communities, and banding together, for people forever evolving, generations arising. How creation is so essential to humanity. How it feels to be tied to the world, not living above it. They've forgotten how it feels to live amongst it all.
And thing is, they don't even realise it. Time has warped their perception, and for them, this is their normal. They've forgotten that their normal is so different from most. And they could do with being reminded, that being disconnected is not what makes them wise - is not what keeps them safe. Because all that mentality has shown, in clear abundance, is that they're tearing everyone apart.
They may think that what they're encouraging is maturity and true loyalty - but really, all they're breeding is nihilism.
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pratchettquotes · a month ago
"Well, you brought some magic into that little life," said Albert, as the next child was hurried away.
"You mean the sort of fear and awe and not knowing whether to laugh or cry or wet their pants?"
Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
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kittlys · 6 months ago
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+💐 ㌚㌴ 𝗟♡𝗩𝗘 🍄₍ᵔ˳︬ᵔ₎︬  ♡ ꪔ̤̮ ﹟ 🍱🐞 . . . 癳の¡! ᥣꪱ̫̻к꧖ ⌿ 𐑾ᦸ̫̻طℓອᧁ 사랑헤✧˖° ♥︎ with psd @randomwithpsd
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araekni · 4 months ago
could you please do a webweave around toxic fathers
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Mary Ruefle, Woodtangle
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Ocean Vuong, Someday I’ll Love Ocean Vuong
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Agustín Gómez-Arcos, The Carnivorous Lamb
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@heavensghost (x)
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elandrialore, Dreams of Dying
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Bruce Springsteen, Adam Raised A Cain
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Catherine Lacey, Cut / @heavensghost
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Desireé Dallagiacomo, Origin Story
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Jamaica Kincaid, The Autobiography of My Mother
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Clementine von Radics, Every Time A Man Yells
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Lanning, Lord of the Flies
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Richard Siken, War of the Foxes (ii)
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Joan Tierney, Free-Range Angel Produce: An Idyll
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Augusten Burroughs, A Wolf at the Table
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black-and-yellow · a month ago
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[Hurt Someone]
Love listening to a song and immediately analysing the lyrics to fit it into the AU.
Read more for just the lineart because I preferred it without the colour but by that time it was too late.
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I know it has the transparent background. I had to save a WIP screenshot. Leave me alone I just like his hair shading.
#I will now tell you all about how the words to Hurt Someone fits with the AU #much like I did with the Puff the Magic Dragon theme song when I was listening to that on repeat #OK so hear me out #the first line is 'everything that's evil is all coming back' and I don't have much for this one but it could apply to #perhaps just the League or the Liberation Army or whatever they are stepping up their game #but then the second line is 'everything that haunts you appears in the black' which made me think of Shirakumo's face in the Kurogiri mist #next up we have 'everyone that loves you is letting you down' #think 'let down' as in Whoops Your Friend is Dead #could also apply to the chapter where Aizawa shuts down Yamada's efforts to talk about what's going on #whichever floats your boat #the chorus is of course 'you gotta hurt someone' but instead of taking this literally think more emotional hurt #after this part we get the switch to villany. We are on the dark side now folks #'showing off your scars' speaks for itself. He has a scar. Whatever. #'hating what you are' applies to the angst. the regretting becoming a villain part. the Whoops Shouldn't Have Done That part. #next line is 'the parts of you that dream are gagged' and to be honest I started losing steam around here. #general loss of hope for the heroes I guess #and I don't really have anything for 'love what cures your fear. Eat what keeps you here' #maybe you guys can help me out with that one? #but the rest was good. right? #you can tell I've just found a song I like and begun a downward spiral #I'll get back to you once I hate it #bnha au #mha au #hizashi yamada #villain!mic #loudspeaker au #tried to brush some dirt off Yamada's knee yesterday but he almost escaped #if this guy gets out one day I don't know what I'm going to do because I'm scared of squashing him if I try and pick him up #or dropping him or whatever #he's just a little guy
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bthump · a month ago
I love your metas, so I was wondering if there's a character (besides guts, griffith, or casca) that you feel perfectly encapsulates one or more of the major themes in berserk, like a character that is somewhat "less" important to the story, but if they were missing, there'd be a noticeable hole?
Thank you!
this is a really interesting question tbh. Hm.
Gambino leaps to mind pretty quick. Obviously he’s important to the story in that his influence has profoundly affected Guts, but even just thematically I think he perfectly encapsulates Berserk’s like... take on humanity, and the duality of monster and man. He’s an abusive father to Guts, and has hurt him greatly, but at the same time Guts still loves him because of those glimpses of humanity he saw - the medicine, his buried guilt over missing Shizu’s death, saving Guts’ life on the battlefield.
He’s not the first man Guts killed, or the first monster, but he’s the first one Guts regretted killing, arguably the first one whose death changed Guts and made Guts take his first steps down the road to monster.
But there’s lots of good answers for this imo. Zodd would be another one I think, who also encapsulates the monster vs man theme pretty well from the other side, as well as being sort of symbolic of Guts’ trauma and the internalized fear that drives him/everyone in the story. Technically I think all apostles fit that, but Zodd is the main one.
Or, for a character who is much less important to the story plot-wise, but still very relevant thematically, you got Godo for instance, whose job is basically stating some of the themes of the story lol. You’re like this sword, you ran away so your own darkness could burn in you, you should’ve mourned with your remaining friends instead, don’t abandon what you can’t replace, etc.
I also think Sonia describing loneliness and like, metaphysical isolation in chapter 250 is extremely thematically relevant and probably the most important aspect of her character, as a parallel to NeoGriffith. How being singular makes you alone. Irvine in that scene also does a great job of embodying how isolation makes you a monster but conversely being with people makes you more human, when he gives her his cloak as a blanket after a whole monologue about how he embraces isolation and becoming a beast.
Anyway yeah, honestly I think Miura was great at having almost all of his characters, from major to minor, reflect the themes of the story in some way so there are probably 50 more good answers to this, but I’ll stick with these for now. Thanks for the ask!
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fail-big · 3 months ago
when you assume
- cw angst
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"yaku seems to think you liked me when we were at nekoma," kuroo muses.
it was supposed to be a passive comment, something to poke fun at, a minute to reminisce about your high school days, but still there's a flicker of curiosity beneath the surface.
and unexpectedly, your heart stutters for the first time in nearly a decade. life happens, friendships fade, and suddenly 10 years go by and you're sitting in an izakaya you would've never been able to afford with your measly 17 year-old weekly allowance, catching up with the boy, man, you were too afraid to confess to all those years ago.
but instead of being met with a fit of laughter or a playful jab or something along of the lines of "that's ridiculous!", your cat eyes blink twice, head cocked to the right at a 45 degree angle. you're suddenly all too aware of a stray piece of hair tickling your forehead.
had he really not known?
and for the first time since you've known kuroo, the kuroo tetsurou, the smile you assumed was permanently etched into his annoyingly symmetrical face falters.
it's ... unnerving, disarmingly so. though you're unsure why.
perhaps it's because oh my gods, you thought he knew. how could he not? everyone knew, so you assumed he did too.
but it's probably more so the fact that kuroo tetsurou is actually a human being; you weren't an idiot. of course he was human being, a living and breathing and thinking entity. that much was obvious enough.
but it's the realization that he's made of flesh and blood and a beating heart and that he needed protection at all that is unsettling, guarded by an armor in the form of a smackable smirk or contagiously goofy grin.
and that that carefully crafted defense was slowly cracking. crumbling away because of you. collapsing because he didn't know. because you didn't know.
"i thought..." he hesitates, taking bit too much time to materialize his thoughts, "i didn't know you felt the same way."
the air is stale, and this restaurant has the ugliest wallpaper you've ever seen, you mentally note.
but it's not ugly enough because the weight of kuroo's gaze boring into you is far too intense, and reluctantly you're pulled out of denial and left to face the truth and the biggest what if of your life.
your mind is still reeling, attempting to fully process, download, and decipher the information that's being presented before you. but your 1993 engine of a brain has been working on outdated software for far too long and the error codes won't stop flashing. it's not like you can alt + f4 out of this situation.
one minute you're on the cusp of adulthood eagerly waiting to grow up, and the next minute you actually are an adult, begrudgingly so, with adult money and adult relationships and adult responsibilities.
this isn't a movie. you don't get to blindly take a chance on the possibility of a lost love without considering the consequences. it's too late for that. getting to choose stability isn't a luxury for you anymore. it's a must.
you're engaged, happily at that. and kuroo is too, really.
it's not worth it. it's not worth you changing the life you've worked so hard build. it's not worth you sacrificing something so good, an assured good, for a maybe great.
it's not worth it.
but it might have been.
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thanks for reading! m.list. | crack | angst | fluff
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mandomunoz · 5 months ago
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ororo munroe suggested by @laurakinnney​!
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cervelli · 9 months ago
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@wizardingworldonline​ event 03 | side characters
“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”
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reactionimagesdaily · 2 months ago
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sokkagatekeeper · 4 months ago
when it comes to fictional boys around 2008 whose defining trait is the persistence of their revolutionary kindness despite of the fact that their circusmtances and environments twist in favor of a world full of hatred and senseless violence, where instead their kindness does in fact start revolutions and end wars. aang really ran so peeta could run just as fast didnt he
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Melvyn Grant
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