#these pics broke me on so many levels

[kiss-me-muchoo]

𝐒𝐮𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐥𝐲, 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 || 𝐌𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐎’𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

part one: Do you want a baby? || part two || part three: Dharma

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲- what was supposed to be just a general diagnosis turns into a pregnancy reveal + how your water broke in the middle of an actual date with Miguel. 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬_ pregnancy, child birth, grumpy!soft!Miguel x sunshine!reader, sex allusions, implied short reader, implied age gap (legal) NO PROOFREAD :). 𝐀/𝐍_ recommended songs; so it goes and lover again (calling all the reputation & lover stans like me!!!)

♪ ♫ my miguel playlist. ✰ index (masterlist/ other works there)

______________

It would never stop being weird.

Looking at Miguel O’Hara with a tiny female spider by his side, her arm wrapped around his giant forearm, resulting in a confusing image.

Yet, the image continued as Gwen, Miles, Hobie, and Pavitr looked at you and your husband passing through the cafeteria and going to his office.

“How long have they been married?” Miles asked. Pavitr counted with his fingers.

“I think they’re about to turn two years,” he replied. Hobie smirked, looking at his friend.

“The wedding was sick… Remember?” Gwen and Miles looked at each other confused.

“What happened at the wedding?” The blonde girl asked.

Out of nowhere, Peter B. Parker appeared with a tray of food and Mayday on top of his head.

“Hey, kids. What are you talking about?”

“Miguel and y/n’s wedding,” Miles answers.

Peter lets out a little sigh like he is bringing back a happy memory. Pavitr also made the same gesture.

“It was a wonderful night…” Mayday went straight to Hobie’s arms, and the man was funnily tickling her. So Peter took advantage of that and got his phone out.

“I have pictures!” Gwen and Miles let out a NO WAY, LET ME SEE in unison.

“Alright, alright. Here’s the ceremony…” The phone displayed a picture of what seemed like a church. You had an elegant and vintage dress, Miguel was wearing a tuxedo, and the place was full of candles and sparkles that made the picture look so perfect that it was concerning.

“Miguel looks…” Gwen started.

“Happy?” Hobie asks for her. Everyone nods.

“Oh, show her the party, man,” Hobie suggested with a big grin. Making Miles and Gwen even more confused.

Some pics showed your friends, Jess and Margo, as your bridesmaids. Lego Spider-Man was one of Miguel’s best men; the cake had six layers.

It was a big celebration. With many spider people around, part of your family, and what seemed like a summer afterparty.

Gwen giggled at the variety of pictures; you and Miguel cutting the cake, the waltz… until the pictures turned a little… intense.

“Damn…” Miles let out. Hobie started laughing, looking at the pictures, and Pavitr was getting blushed.

From alcohol shots, a mess in the pool, and you and Miguel doing the infamous wedding garter removal.

“OKAY!… this is not for kids,” Peter yelled, snatching the phone from the pair of teenagers.

“How did that happen?” the girl asked. Neither she nor Miles could believe they would live to see Miguel, you, and other serious spider people doing things like that.

“Alcohol. Boss was drunk as hell….” Hobie said, evidently mocking the leader of the Spider Society.

“It was after the family left, only… close friends. I must admit it’s the coolest wedding I’ve ever been invited to,” Peter accepted. Pavitr nodded.

“Yes, it was at the same level as an Indian wedding,” that was a lot to say.

Soon, Lyla appeared and gave a disapproving look to the whole table.

“Why are you here doing nothing? Jess assigned new missions and- AWW, Is that a picture from Miguel and y/n’s wedding?” The AI appeared beside Peter, looking at his phone.

“Yes. Was a good party, remember?” Lyla nodded at Hobie.

“Until they left for their honeymoon. And I had to do all the job myself for….like a month.”

“You sound like you suffered…” Gwen said.

“I did”

“You’re an AI, Lyla. You can’t feel anything….” Everyone laughed.

“Insensible kids. Now go meet Jess for the mission’s debriefing unless you want Miguel's lecture on your lives.”

With that, everyone left to their respective rooms to hear the debriefings.

…

“Well, that was fun,” Miles commented. Enjoying a giant cheese empanada from the cafeteria. Gwen nodded, and Hobie shrugged, following them.

“Time to go home. I’m tired…” Everyone started to say their goodbyes. Hobie was gone, and then Margo appeared, running towards them.

“Hey! What’s up, Margo?” Jealousy immediately invaded Gwen, and she soon went to appear beside Miles. Nothing personal, but the feeling had been evolving. She liked Margo but didn’t like how she and Miles interacted.

“Haven’t you heard?… y/n is injured” The pair looked between them worriedly.

“Is she okay?”

“I don’t know. I was about to go and see her. Jess said it was delicate.”

Everyone started pacing towards the clinic.

It was as big as the whole HQ; bright, clean, and futuristic.

Many spiders were there, injured people, waiting for surgery, medicines, etc.

However, their way was towards one of the private rooms.

There, you were lying in a bed in the center.

Beside you, Miguel holding your hand.

In a hologram form, Jess and Lyla were looking too.

“What are you doing here?” Miguel asked, intimidating Gwen, Margo, and Miles with his massive height.

“We heard y/n was injured…” Margo dared to respond.

You smiled. You really loved them, so you giggled.

“This isn’t over…” Miguel spoke once again, pointing at you. Oh, Miguel and his so-ever-grumpy attitude.

But you knew there was a lot to talk about back home. A lot…

“Are you okay?”

“Are you gonna be able to go back to work tomorrow?” Miles and Gwen bombard you with lots of questions. Margo was always more considerate, so she stood quiet.

And Miguel was rolling his eyes and looking beyond annoyed, cringed by his younger employees’ questions.

“No, stop saturating her with stupid questions. She’s pregnant, kids….” Miguel said, maintaining his stoic posture.

Jess let out a little laugh, noticing that Margo was the only one to react at the moment.

Her mouth opened to form a big o of shock.

“Do you have anything broken?” The blonde girl in turquoise Converse asked.

“Just my ankle, a sprain in my inner tight… oh, and I have a baby,” you comment softly, rubbing your stomach with a smile.

The teenagers keep making comments Margo is already paralyzed. You laugh again, covering your lips. Then turn to look at Miguel, who’s rolling his eyes again.

“YOU WHAT?…” their eyes are going to pop out.

“You’re pregnant?” Gwen asks.

“That’s why I just said…” Miguel adds with frustration. Then proceeding to whisper something in Spanish.

“I’m very happy for you two, congratulations” Margo is always polite and sweet. You accept her hug, and the other two teens are all over you. Showering you with ideas for baby names, a baby shower hosted by Peter, and making the kid’s first birthday party in the HQ.

“We have to tell this to the others!”

“No. We don’t want to. “

But Miles and Gwen are already out, both still in shock, ignoring Miguel and his desire to keep your status private.

You don’t mind, actually. Everyone would know in a couple of months. But Miguel… what can you say? He’s your husband.

And he kept pinching the bridge of his nose, proving how annoyed he was.

“Paciencia, paciencia…” he keeps murmuring. Margo giggles before turning to leave.

“I’ll try to stop them,” she offers.

“Thanks, Margo,” your husband thanks her with a brief glance.

“Someone has to stop those kids and their unlimited energy” Jess comments, making you laugh.

Soon, it’s just you and your husband.

“Now what?” You ask, rubbing your eyes.

Miguel leans to brush some strays of hair behind your ear, giving you a warm look.

“Now I’m taking you home…”

He thinks you look sweet with the hospital gown, perfect hair, and no makeup.

And although he’s scared as hell of you being already so far in the pregnancy, he dreams of the day you are in the same position. With a baby in your arms…

…

“Your wife is almost six months pregnant…” Spider-doctor had said.

“Sorry… I’M WHAT?”

Miguel stood there frozen, holding your hand. You were also in shock.

His world sure stopped for some seconds. All the months trying, wondering why you couldn’t get pregnant, it was because you were already growing a baby.

“But-… I don’t have any symptoms. I don’t even have a belly,” you blurt. "Human bodies work out differently. For spiders, it can work beyond differently” Miguel, and you turn to look at each other.

His face came to hide in your shoulder almost immediately. Whispering ‘thank you’ multiple times, kissing your hair, working in private, so Doctor Spider-man couldn’t see.

Almost six months of going to missions like nothing, having sex like always (every day, at least four rounds). Damn… Miguel had to be more careful.

“I’ll come again to get you a scan and everything. I’m going to leave to get your blood test results.” With that, Doctor Spider-man leaves.

Now, you are sitting in your bed. Remembering the moment you found out the news. Looking at the candles that illuminated your desk across your bookshelves.

In a moment, Miguel entered with a little tray.

“I got your favorite chicken wrap, tea, and cookies…” Now you know you’re pregnant and suddenly want to cry about everything. He was so sweet. His reaction to the pregnancy was calm, and he promised to look forward instead of his past. And now he appeared at your door with some of your favorite snacks and looked beautiful; yes, you’re crying.

“Oh no. Don’t cry, hermosa,” he soothes you. Your little whimpers made him realize he had to be careful with his words. Then the thought of you being unconsciously reckless, putting yourself in danger, edging Miguel towards another breakdown…

“It’s just that… I’m- we’re halfway through this, and I can’t believe everything I did. I could have….”

“No. It was almost impossible to know you were pregnant, love. You would’ve not put yourself in danger at the slight chance….”

“Now what? I don’t want to put the baby at risk, but I can’t stay doing nothing for the rest of the pregnancy. I’m a spider-woman….”

“I know what you’re thinking” Miguel was being so patient. He was listening to you and never letting your hand go.

“Since we started trying… I’ve psyched myself that it could be dangerous. But it’s not gonna be the same. I’m not gonna lose any of you two. Because I know this is correct” Of course, he was afraid, but he committed to letting go of his past and focusing on this present with you. So he would not try to control it and you.

“You’re my lovely wife. I know you, and you’re a strong and perfect woman who will take care of our baby when I can’t be around….” you are shocked. You have to squeeze his hand to confirm you're not dreaming.

He sounds so peaceful, wearing white socks with a hoodie and pants. And he looks that perfect? You had to be dreaming.

“You are taking some weeks to recover from the ankle, the sprain, and one more check to see the baby. Then, low-impact missions, and in the last month, I have you in my office. What do you think?” you nod, smiling. Pushing yourself to sit and hug him and feel his big hands moving across your back.

“Thank you. We love you so much, Miguel…”

We. Oh, he would cry too.

“I love you two so much too. Completely… my whole world…”

“Yeah. No wonder why your plan sounds like you want to have me by your side for the next four months 24/7,” he smiles.

“Maybe that’s the idea…I want my little family with me all the time” You let yourself fall into the pillows again.

You lift your shirt and start poking your flat stomach. Miguel looks at you with curiosity.

“I can’t believe it’s almost six months old, we have a healthy baby, and I don’t have a bump.”

“Well, you look gorgeous as usual. Maybe there’s even a glow on you that I overlooked before”

“It’s my hair, right?”

“Could be…” both of you giggle.

But finally, there’s a time for a kiss. And it feels like bliss like his lips were everything to soothe the confusing thoughts, to feel happy and blessed for the child growing inside you.

His hands sneak through your exposed skin to gently stroke your stomach, hoping to connect with the baby.

He’s going to treasure this new opportunity. He had taken it the first time by marrying you, protecting you but never trying to control you. So he would follow the same recipe for this pregnancy.

From the love you two shared, passion always bloomed.

You felt amazing, so nothing would stop you from having your husband that night. So you started to tangle your fingers through his hair cause it never failed to tease him.

“God… we have to stop, bonita.”

“Why?” You ask with a pout, coming to hug his neck and giving him an annoyed look.

“The baby…”

“The baby has been fine since day one. Want to remember all the things we’ve done in the last five months?” you can swear he’s about to blush. So you giggle.

“You’re gonna be the death of me…” he complains.

But soon, you see his head disappear under the hem of your skirt.

Finally, you exhale with peace and tranquility.

…

Miguel fixes your suit from behind, his own suit already activated. He can hear your heavy breathing and feels slightly guilty because now, with the baby, your breathing could get hatred.

“See? Perfect as usual, mami…” he says, holding your hips, admiring you. He loved seeing his little wife waddling around the HQ with her cute belly and adorable smile. But having her in the HQ, making a moment only for him? It was a blessing.

“We spent at least an hour here; it’s gonna look obvious, Miguel,” you say, ignoring his comments. Your red cheeks, shiny skin, and curled hair could give you away.

Stupid pregnancy hormones.

Since your belly popped out in the seventh month, it felt like a prolonged fertile week that made you feel sexy and loved by your husband. As a result, extreme rounds of sex came like nothing most days.

“Honestly… I don’t care, hermosa,” he admits smiling. You roll your eyes, pinching his hand to annoy him.

“Sometimes you’re insufferable,” he smirks.

“You love me…” he attacks back, and you can’t help but blush like a little girl.

“Yeah, sometimes it scares me how much I do love you” The moment turns soft, as usual, between you and him.

Miguel turns into a giant heart marshmallow for you. All he can think is about how happy you make him.

“Can we have a date on Friday?” You ask with a cute and shy tone.

“Sure, mami. Where do you wanna go?” That fucking nickname. He meant it sweetly and adorably because, in his head, you were already a mommy. Still, he also says it in a hot way to proudly remember you he got you pregnant.

“The library and that new bakery near home” he would never say no to having a date with you. Never.

“You got me, bonita. I’m in the mood for a thriller book and some… What do you call those little cakes?” since you started dating, Miguel would pick one of your books to read together every night. The pastries only came to the scene on the weekends, though.

“Turkish pastries? Stop, I’m getting hungry. Oh, and I don’t mind another memoir, but yeah, I’m into the thriller book too,” he smiles, offering you another sweet smile. Thinking about how much he wants Friday to come and be out with you.

“I have to assign missions with Lyla. I’ll see you in my office. Okay?”

“Okay, amor,” the characteristic pull on his rib appears; he knows he must lean down and kiss you.

It’s slow, passionate, and delightful. His lips are soft despite all the times he had bitten himself with his sharp fangs. He was always so careful to avoid hurting you. He always avoided contact, but that didn’t stop him from playing with the skin of your neck in the most intimate moments.

“We love you…”

“Me too, bonita. I love you two with my whole heart….”

…

Your stomach was painfully churning. You were hungry, and your baby was asking for something too.

Maybe a burger with my husband’s mask printed on the bun. A side of fries with sweet and sour sauce; yeah, that’ll work, you think.

So you are peacefully sitting in the cafeteria. Waiting for Miguel to come back to the HQ and spent the rest of the day with him. Your mask is resting beside your phone and your web shooters.

It was crazy how the pregnancy made you both clingier than ever. His hands never leave your body, especially your belly. You don’t want to be separated from him for long periods. And even your family noticed how close you and Miguel were.

You asked where he went during a family gathering, only to find him drinking a beer with your father. And your aunts said you two were attached to hip… to the max.

“Hey, there’s my favorite spider-mama. Don’t tell Jess!” Peter appeared on your side with his kids; Hobie, Pavitr, Gwen, Miles, and Mayday.

“Hey, guys!” Mayday immediately went after you. Playing with your belly and softly poking at the roundness of it.

“Wow, your skin looks amazing!” Gwen flatters you, which causes a big blush on your face.

“Oh, thank you. I spent some time in the sauna today…” Miguel convinced you to try the least heated sauna room, saying it was good for your aching belly. However, it turned into a wild session of sex with at least an hour of duration. But your friends wouldn’t know that.

“How are you feeling?” Peter asked.

“Fine. You say maybe two more weeks or so…” you rub your belly along Mayday. Her beanie is dirty, and you promise her to clean it up before the day is over.

“I can’t believe you guys don’t know the sex of the baby…” Pavitr commented. You giggle, shrugging.

“I want it to be special. Especially for Miguel… you know his past,” they all nodded. They could see their boss apathetic as usual, barely glancing at them, ignoring their jokes, etc. But every employee of the Spider Society knew Miguel O’Hara had only one weakness; you.

And now that you were pregnant, it was impossible to not notice how Miguel tried to remain calm and be more patient about everything.

“I’m still a little hurt that I wasn’t the first to receive the news,” Peter B. Parker admitted, watching his daughter play with you.

“You left early that day!. You didn’t even know I was injured.”

“Yeah… and I called as soon as I learned the news” You pat his shoulder.

“Oh, Peter. You know you’re one of my best friends. And you’ll be my kid’s godfather,” his eyes sparkled. Everyone laughed at the comment, but Peter was pleased about it.

“I already got something for the kid…” Hobie announced.

“Aww, Hobie!… That’s so sweet, thanks!” their fondness towards you and your baby makes you want to tear up.

“Please, don’t give the child a set of piercings or the book of historic protests like you did with Mayday,” Pavitr prays, looking at his friend. Gwen was laughing so hard that it infected everyone.

However, Hobie had a little guitar full of excellent phrases and stickers he had collected over the months.

“It’s something better,” your punk friend promised.

You really liked spending time with them. It was like a second family that you could enjoy every day.

Then the conversation was all about Pavitr's upcoming big Indian party in Mumbattan. He invited everyone, and you promised to show up with Miguel and the baby.

Then you realized something. You really craved it, being a family of three.

…

A pink box was stuffed with Turkish pastries; 4 pieces of baklava, 2 of basbousa, and a slice of baklava cheesecake.

The sweet woman placed a green ribbon on top of the box, and you squealed out of happiness cause the ribbon matched the pistachio crumbles on the pastries.

“Thank you…” Miguel thanks the woman and follows you toward the exit.

The date was amazing, as usual. Hours spent between bookshelves, stolen kisses, and spending on four books to read in the following months.

“I can’t wait to eat this at home… my mouth is watering, amor,” he chuckled, admitting that these last few weeks, you looked even cuter with your bump and emotional attitude.

“Yeah, give me the box. Or else there won't be any cake left before we arrive home” Frowning, you hand him the box. The way to the parking lot is quiet.

But there’s a pair of big smiles on both of your faces.

The whole day you’ve felt tremendous pressure on your lower belly, nothing painful, but the feeling was weird. Only two weeks left, and then…poof!!, the baby was here.

A heavy noise disconcerted you. And when you looked to your left, Miguel had bumped himself with a lamppost.

Your heavy laughs are all it can be heard isn’t the parking lot after that.

“Stop laughing. I was taking care of you, not stumbling with the bags and your belly” he heard you let out a long oww before continuing to laugh. His spider sense was worse since he learned you were pregnant, always taking care of you. His eyes never leave you, alert in case of anything.

He’s annoyed but smiles at the sight of you being so happy.

Until…he noticed something on your pants. There was a big spot; it certainly looked like…

“Bonita…I think-I think you just….” As you follow his words, you look down to see why your pants and underwear feel drenched.

And once again, you’re laughing.

“Oh my god, Miguel. I think I just…” you peed on yourself for laughing so hard. You’re embarrassed, but still, you find the humor to find it funny. Miguel gets closer and takes the bags of books and your purse from your hands, finally laughing too.

“This is what happens when you make fun of your husband…” he opens the car door for you, and you only send him a lousy look before he keeps smiling. When you accommodate on the seat, your disgusted face worries Miguel. He leans to inspect you better.

“What? What is it, mi vida?” Your discomfort grows, and your hands travel to your lower belly. Seconds later, your eyes pop open in shock.

“Oh god. I don’t think it was pee after all…” you reveal, looking at your husband. His eyes also open in shock, and he starts breathing heavily.

He starts walking in little circles between the space of your car and the neighbor from the parking lot.

All he can think about is that a little human is trying to get out of you.

His life is about to change. All he ever wanted was going to be complete. He had to be strong for you and put his trauma away, like during the pregnancy.

“Okay. Does it hurts now?” He asks, returning to kneeling and looking you in the face.

You shake your head, not even knowing how you feel.

“Not really. I just feel like there’s something stuck inside me and-“

“And?” He urges you.

“And I want to push it out…” he nods, already feeling sweat on his forehead. He leans to kiss your forehead and hold your hands.

“Activate your suit, bonita. We need to go back to the HQ…”

“WHAT? NO… Just take me to a normal hospital, Miguel,” you say, trying to calm down.

“We can’t. Doctor Spider-man has been treating you since we found out. He’ll know better….”

“But…”

“Mami, you’ll have to deliver this baby soon. The best place to do it is in the HQ. You know it, right?” Slowly, you end up nodding.

He makes you look at your watch and activate your suit.

You don’t even feel when your soaked clothes are gone and you are in the suit's skin. You just feel like some beach ball was stuck inside your mouth, but everything happening on your cervix.

Miguel also activated his suit, including his mask. You shake your head at the sight.

“Oh no, fuck no. I'm not wearing the mask…” he sighs. Miguel is doing everything to not panic and not stress you. Even when he feels surprised you are handling the dilatation very well, he knows he can’t panic you too.

“Okay, don’t wear the mask. Can you stand up?…” you do your best, but it’s impossible to stand straight anymore. You must lean a little and open your legs to soothe the intense pressure on your pelvis.

“It’s okay, mami. We’ll be home with our baby in a blink of an eye.”

“Yeah, I don’t think so, Miguel” Your sarcasm signals him to hurry, so he opens a portal and helps you enter.

…

The room's wide window is like a living landscape, with the futuristic sight of cars and bright lights from skyscrapers.

There were no curtains because no one could see what was happening inside.

You were lying on the hospital bed that night, trying to push out a baby.

“I can’t do this…” you sob. It’s not even that painful (thankfully). The discomfort of the little human sliding out of you very slowly.

“Yes, you can. You are already done, bonita.” Miguel encourages you, which makes you roll your eyes.

“No. I mean-I can do this, just not on this bed…” your husband looks confused, but you ignore him to turn to Doctor Spider-man.

“You can try on your feet,” the doctor speaks through his mask. You nod, and with Miguel’s help, you end up on the edge of the bed; instantly, you feel the pressure of your baby slightly better.

You hear the doctor’s instructions, and even Miguel is in a position to help to catch the kid. You hold onto his broad shoulders to support yourself. Then, after three more big pushes, you feel it…the baby is out.

“We got it,” Miguel hears the doctor say, and a wave of soft cries instantly starts to echo across the room.

Desperation floods Miguel, who wants to see his baby and know everything is fine.

As the doctor cuts the cord and makes Miguel help you to lay on the bed again, he can’t stop kissing your forehead.

“Thank you, y/n. Thank you so much,” you nod, feeling tears in your eyes.

“Congratulations, it’s a girl,” officially, there are tears in your husband’s eyes. Doctor Spider leaves, saying he will come back with some papers and to help you.

He thinks Gabriella must’ve been very happy to have a little sister.

“Here you go…,” and everything is a comfortable silence once the baby is in your arms.

She’s tiny, with sun-kissed skin like his father, brown matted hair, and grey eyes that will eventually turn into chocolate like his father’s.

Her eyes are slightly open, she looks like she’s yawning, and her little tongue pokes out occasionally.

“Look, Miguel…” he leans to inspect his daughter closer.

He’s in love with her, and he’s beyond in love with you. He would always thank you for giving him a second chance to be a father.

“Oh, I’m in love again. She’s perfect, amor,” you sob, kissing the baby’s tiny head.

“I can’t believe this… I had nothing. Then I found you. And now…suddenly, we have a baby,” he confessed, caressing her rosy cheek.

“How do we name her?” He asks again.

“I want something related to her father’s name…”

“Are you sure, bonita?” You nod. After all, Miguel deserved it, and you wanted to do it for him.

“Yeah. Magalí, Marina, and Magdalena have been in my mind” his smile lights up with your last option, easily looking at her baby with that name.

“I like Magdalena…”

“Then… hello, baby Magda” you coo at your daughter, feeling her soft skin and plump cheeks.

“Your mommy and I love you so much, baby” Miguel’s hand comes to take yours, and together, you’re admiring your baby girl.

Doctor Spider enters after a knock on the door, holding a little binder.

“Okay, we’re cleaning her and healing you….” he announces. He adds that you’ll be fine in three weeks with a good recovery and that the baby was healthy. Miguel is so thankful and happy. He can barely hide his smile from his coworker.

“But before that… Lyla wants me to congratulate you two and ask if she can spread the news. Everyone is asking for this little family,” you smile. Spider plushie and Lego Spider-Man must be very worried and spider cat. You want to see your friends soon.

“No. We don’t want to share-“

“Miguel.” You scold him, give him a bad look, then look down at your daughter, smiling again.

“Yes, you can tell Lyla to share the news,” the AI appears before you. Her eyes open at the sight of the new addition of the HQ.

“Oh-great. And- OH MY GOD, SHE’S SO CUTE” Miguel instantly rolls his eyes, looking at Lyla moving in front of her tiny daughter and simulating touching her. There’s a little pink headband with a flower in Magdalena’s little head, which doubles how cute she looks.

“Thanks, Lyla…”

“Peter and Pavitr are on their way already. Probably the others will be joining us later” You nod once again. Feeling so welcomed and accepting that Miguel was right.

It was the best idea to give birth to your daughter in the HQ.

“Great. More visits!…” Miguel complains with a big load of sarcasm.

“Sorry…see ya later. ” with that, Lyla disappears.

“Ay, mami. You don’t know what you’ve done” Miguel can hear everyone talking about him and you and the baby. Having all his annoying coworkers asking questions and grabbing his daughter. However, he knows that will make you happy.

“Miguel, don’t be like that. This day is special… but we have our whole lives to have a family moment… just the three of us” he knows you’re right. So he sighs, letting a smile appear on your face.

“Right, yeah. You’re right…”

“I know. Now give me a kiss…” as his lips collide with yours, he takes baby Magda from your arms. She’s light as a feather, beautiful, and Miguel can’t think about ever putting her down in your arms again.

“I love you so much, hermosa. And that will never change…”

“Oh, Miguel. You and Magda are my full happiness now. I love you too.”

Miguel feels complete. He had his daughter in his arms; you on his lips.

And he hoped to treasure that feeling… forever.

______________________________________

Can we think about how baby Mayday and baby Magda are going to be BESTIES now?!?! *sobs*

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@g0oshtt

@ang3l-dust1

@electro-supremacy

@bestie1223

@dangerousness15

@iluvjisoo

@atlaincorrect

@naponiac

@edgycatx

@fluffy-koalala

#miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel spiderverse #miguel o’hara x y/n #miguel o’hara #accross the spiderverse #atsv x reader #atsv

[booburt]

Hi, I've been wondering for the photography AU what general time period it's set in, what type of camera(s) does Koby use (it looks like a canon to me but seems to make polaroids, at least that's the surface level observation I can make from my extremely limited knowledge on cameras), what type of photography he personally enjoys and the type he usually does for work (if he does it as his profession too). What does Koby aim to capture with his images, the casual mundane life of an average person, an unreal, etheral sight in a place the average person can't go, Luffy's luffiness, etc? Also what's the general budget Koby has towards camera equipment (doesn't need to be that exact, just a general "he's broke" or "He spends all his money on lenses" would suffice)? My questions are kinda vague here because I'm going to research more about photography later. Thanks in advance :D Oh yeah and also does Koby travel, if not what's the general landscape of his nearby area. You don't need to answer this since I'll probably make it up but it'd be good to know.

okok i wrote this all in the few free periods i got earlier take what you will ^_^

also a doodle i did ages aaaaago with a bit of slightly illegible info in my awful handwriting (sorry)

actual answer vvv

- its a modern au!! so set like. now!

- koby uses sony cameras primarily but yes he does have a few canons (nikon confuses him)

- he has a seperate polaroid camera!!! he usually prints digitally from sd though

- for type of photography, he started with a passion for ocean and landscape photography, mostly beaches and any scene with water in focus. he also has an interest in portraiture but his love for portraiture only comes to play when he meets luffy. cheese cheese cheeeesyyyy because luffy smiles and hes IMMEDIATELY enamoured. anyway, he starts to study and practice portraiture in depth because of the pretty boy he met in maths class and eventually works up the courage to ask him to model for him. they get super close and eventually start dating; luffy likes how dedicated koby is to his work and how cute he is when he blushes.

-SORDY got carried away with the sappy lovey stuff. koby sells his landscape/wildlife photography at local stores as a side hustle thing haha. but he doesnt really do it professionally, he much prefers to keep it as a hobby / simple income.

- koby aims to capture the beauty of colour! he loves vibrancy when shooting with a softbox or some other source of light he will usually use something to change the hue rather than plain old bw on a simple white bg

- following on he HATES shooting black and white photos unless theyre negatives because idk i think he would think it looks cool. what a guy

- with luffy photography he just likes catching luffys smile or just luffy in general; whipped dud!!! he thinks he is gorgeous

- ahahhhh budget budgettt. lenses are fucking EXPENSIVE!!! he uses a 50mm that helmeppo got him for his birthday one year (rich kid stuff. he knew koby likes photography and searched Best Lense For People Pictures and bought the first one he saw) the 50 is canon as consequence so koby uses canon for loofy pics. he has an 18-55mm he uses as well.

- he is broke yes. koby does have a minimum wage weekend job to pay for living expenses but all in all that boys pockets are empty. luffy is the breadwinner (miss rabbit with the one zillion jobs) he works about 4 different jobs and is happy to pay for anything koby wants despite kobys adamant NOs. like i said he gets helmeppo to pay for a bunch of stuff and helmeppo pays on his dads card LOL.

- koby does travel! mainly by train or boat, not often does he go to an entirely different country but he has previously a few times. when he does go abroad he takes luffy with him!!!! (he looks pretty in the snow. he likes taking pictures of him in snow)

IM SO GLAD SOMEONE LIKES MY AU ENOUGH TO ASK ME THIS MANY QUESTIONS LMAO i had fun answering all of this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#kobylu #cobylu #kobylu photography au #booburt stuff :3

[in-death-we-fall]

Aesthetics of Hate

This is the House of Nine. There is a horror that echoes through its walls. There is a horror that shifts and broods. A horror that coils itself into a moment of truth. This is our house. We have heard it sing.

It’s started again, hasn’t it? That’s why we’re back. That’s why we’ve… changed.

Back? Listen.

We never left.

Slipknot’s drug, alcohol and ego problems are history. No longer at war with each other, the only struggle now is finding a way to finish it.

Words: Ken McIntyre. Pics: Steve Brown.

Aka the one that aged like milk. Many thanks to @incredizort for sharing your collection. (docs link)

The are the village people of the damned, a psychedelic terror circus populated by depressed clowns, obsessive-compulsives, misanthropes, cyborgs, droogs, ghouls, and goblins. Their sound is a barrage of noise and confusion, a bundle of hiss and the dynamiting of mountains. They look like escaped mental patients on Halloween, and their demeanor vacillates between grandiose and openly hostile. They are Slipknot, and they are legion.

Since 1995, these nine creatures of latex and bone from the fertile plains of Des Moines, Iowa, have lorded over their dysfunctional kingdom of maggots and problem children with shaky hands that have often succumbed to their own wretched excesses. As the band went from strength to strength, from the runaway freight train of their 1999 self-titled debut album to the embittered, embattled success of 2001’s Iowa and their surprisingly tuneful comeback, 2004’s Vol. 3: (The Subliminal Verses), Slipknot scaled unheard-of heights for an extreme metal band, snapping up Gold and Platinum albums, winning Grammy awards, infiltrating the mainstream like sinister double agents.

But none of it came easy, and lurking behind the mask was a band at war with itself; a band riddled with drug, alcohol, and ego problems. In 2005, the levy finally broke, and Sipknot took a much-needed break, the various members healing, mending fences, and exploring other creative avenues. Singer Corey Taylor and guitarist Jim Root returned to Stone Sour, drummer Joey Jordison played with a myriad of bands, from Korn to Metallica, and drummer and visual artist Shawn ‘Clown’ Crahan produced the revealing ‘Knot-doc Voliminal: Inside The Nine, among other projects.

But they could not avoid their fates forever, and so Slipknot return with a roaring new album, All Hope Is Gone, which pits a burgeoning retro-thrash metal obsession and their recent flirtations with melody against their original vision of pure, bloodlusting aggression and brutality. And with this latest dispatch from the abyss comes the expected media saturation, as well as an endless arc of tours and festivals and television performances. It is during the brief calm before the storm that Metal Hammer catches up with Slipknot, rehearsing their new set at Wells fargo Arena in downtown Des Moines.

Slipknot (left to right): Shawn ‘Clown’ Crahan, Chris Fehn, Craig Jones, Joey Jordison, Paul Gray, Mick Thomson, James Root, Sid Wilson Corey Taylor

They say it’s what’s inside you that counts.

That’s what scares me.

It’s in all of us

It’s what binds us that makes us clash. It will happen again.

We’re twisted pieces of the same puzzle. Nine faces that speak with one voice.

The voice of madness…?

Is it normal to be practising in an arena? Shawn ‘Clown’ Crahan (percussion): “It’s not normal, but it’s not surprising at the level we’re at. It was my idea to do this, to practise in the small room and get it tight, and then to come out here and get the feeling of the arena again. Otherwise, you’re practising in people’s houses, and we’re nine brothers. Imagine nine brothers with nine families and everybody running with different crews, and all having different morals and standards and spiritualities. Imagine that fuckin’ insanity. So this makes sense.”

Des Moines had a series of floods recently. Did they affect the band at all? Corey Taylor (vocals): “Not really. I spent a couple days running around saving my friends. Everybody I knew with the exception of just a couple people lived on the flood plain, so I was just going out and helping people get the fuck out of there. I had a house full of people for a week.”

For years now, there have been allegations that you guys all hate each other. Is the band still dysfunctional? Joey Jordison (drums): “Yeah, we are dysfunctional. But I mean, we all grew up together. Me and Mick [Thompson (sic), guitar] are like, best friends, and I used to detest that guy. We fuckin’ hated each other, man. And Shawn, me and him are probably the closest brothers in the whole band, but we probably get along the least because we love each other so much, and we control a lot of what goes on in Slipknot. We’re constantly butting heads. I remember right before Ozzfest, you could just cut the tension between me and him with a knife, it was so thick, and one day I left practice (sic) all pissed off, and I was saying, ‘Fuck off, I think I’m quitting.’ There we were, we just got the ticket, we were on our way to making it. That’s how fuckin’ stressed out we were. And literally – he’s a lot bigger than I am – Shawn flipped his kit over, came over to my drumset, ripped my stuff down and held me by the fuckin’ throat, and I grabbed his throat and went to punch him, and then the whole band dogpiled us. We’ve had lots of fights like that, real fistfights. But even though we still get into fights, we don’t let them last that long anymore. The band is just so intense. I mean, we’ve got nine extreme personalities here.”

That reminds me, on a scale on (sic) one to 10, how nuts is your DJ, Sid? He just told me that he’s a cyborg, and I think he really means it. Joey: “One to 10? Like, 13. Yeah, he’s crazy. You take 72 hits of acid in one weekend, it’s gonna fry your brain up a little bit.”

How do you guys balance all the side-projects with Slipknot? Joey: “It’s fuckin’ simple. Slipknot comes first.”

So it didn’t take any convincing to get everybody back to do a new album? Joey: “Well, it usually happens when the other bands sorta run their course. Certain people in the band decide not to do anything, they just chill out until the next Slipknot record. Me, I do a lot of work with other bands, but Slipknot’s my priority, and I’m glad to be back playing with these guys. The first day when we started rehearsal, usually people are laidback (sic), it was like headbang city man, and we were like, ‘Let’s just get out metal necks, let’s get that shit out of the way.’ It feels great, man. I’m happy.” Corey: “ I was completely stoked to do it. I’d actually started thinking of it and preparing for it on the Stone Sour tour. I just started filling notebooks with ideas. It got to the point where I had two notebooks full of stuff, and I was just ready to go. So as soon as the music was written and the demos started floating around, I was just like, ‘OK, this fits here and this fits here.’ I wasn’t rushing around to write lyrics, which a lot of guys do. I was very prepared and not only was I saying everything I wanted to say, but I was doing it in a way I was ecstatic about. I knew I wanted to go heavier, and I knew at the same time that I wanted to balance that with this melodic side that we had really tapped into. And the proof is there. I think this album is the best thing we’ve ever done, to be honest. I think it really shows the growth of the band and the maturity. But it’s still chaotic and heavy, but it’s still got those moments where you just go, ‘Holy fucking shit!’ Not only is it good, but the more you listen to it, the more you find. There’s a lot of layers, and that’s something that gets lost on a lot of people. There’s just so much thought and so much meaning behind everything we do. It’s not just shock for shock’s sake.”

What’s the theme for All Hope Is Lost (sic)? Umm, hopelessness by any chance? Corey: “It’s not a blatantly political or social album, and it’s not a blatantly angry album. I think the overwhelming theme, for me, is that none of us are the same, but none of us are different. We may change as people, but if we use the same energy to try and solve different problems, nothing is going to get accomplished. And that’s something that I think is lost on a lot of people.”

What was it like having Dave Fortman as a producer for this one? Joey: “Dave was great. It’s not like when we were recording with Rick Rubin – he was like an oracle. He would make these little tweaks from his house. He’d sit in this little library in his house, he’d sit there cross-legged with these prayer beads and he’d get a vibe, and he’d tell the engineer what to do. That was a weird way to record. But Dave, he was there every hour, every day. When we write songs, we tend to write really long like, [Metallica’s] …And Justice For All- type songs, nine or 10 minutes long. So we’d record the song like that, and Dave would help us chop it down. The thing with Dave is, that guy knows his tones. I finally got the best drum sound in my life. The guitar sound, the bass, the percussion… finally, we’ve got the Slipknot sound I’ve been wanting to hear my whole life.”

You’ve got new masks and new outfits, do you feel constrained at all by them? Corey: “No. We don’t only have these, but we have actual outfits that we put together ourselves. They’re still cohesive, but they’re a little more individualistic. We had started doing that on the last album. It’s part of our evolution. If you’re not evolving, you’re dying. No matter what the fucking fans on the websites say, nobody wants to see the same fucking shit over and over again. This time around, we felt it was very important that we are represented as individuals and not just as a band, as pieces of a puzzle. The new mask and outfits range from outrageous to very subtle. It’s a reflection of who we are. But we also kept the boiler suits, because we like to appear as a unit.”

You guys got saddled with the ‘nu metal’ tag early on. Obviously at this point you’ve overcome it… Corey: “There were a couple of bands that were good and that had a really good attitude. Snot comes to mind. That was an amazing band; I loved Snot. (hed)P.E. – their first couple of albums were amazing, because they had so much attitude, and it was so different. But then you had bands like Limp Wristed and all that crap, where it just got so watered down; the P.O.D.s, fuckin’ bands like that, where there was zero talent going on. It was frustrating being caught up in that, but at the same time, people don’t want to think outside of what they already know. They want their opinions forcefed (sic) to them. So if a magazine comes out and says we’re nu metal, than (sic) that’s what they’re going to say. It took us a long time to change people’s minds. We’re just a metal band. The people that wanted to write us off as a nu metal band weren’t our fans, they just didn’t know what to call us. We just got stronger and stronger and more willing to experiment and so they just didn’t know what we were. In that respect, we sort of created our own genre, and there’s a lot of bands that kinda take cues from us now. It’s kinda weird.”

Slipknot broke the ceiling for extreme metal bands making it in the mainstream. Did it shock you when it was happening? Corey: “At the time we didn’t even think about it, we were just real busy working. We were literally on the road for 18 months and saw home for maybe three weeks in that entire time. We were gone forever. But we knew that was going to happen, so we just put our heads down and did what we had to do, because we just refused to lose. So once we got that done we had time to take a breath. We were getting ready to start on the Iowa tour, and we just turned around and were like, ‘Woah! Look what we did. We’re fucking huge!’ We were playing this place that’s not even there anymore, it was called the Bronco Bowl in Dallas. It was set up like a mini-arena and it was just fucking gagged, fucking jammed with people. I remember walking out on stage and thinking, ‘Are we opening up for somebody? Where did all these fucking people come from?’ They knew every word, they knew everything, I remember coming off stage and just having this amazing smile on my face. I was like, ‘Something’s different. We’re not an opening band anymore.’ And I don’t think we’d ever be again, unless we were opening for somebody like Metallica. It was insane, it was probably the best feeling I’ve ever felt in my life.” Joey: “It didn’t happen overnight, because we had to work so hard for it but… it happened overnight. We went on Ozzfest, and three weeks into it we’d sold 150,000 records. Every time we played, everybody – every fucking band, Black Sabbath included – was out there watching us. And we’re out for blood, we fucking hate everybody, just ‘Fuck you!’ That’s always been the Slipknot mentality. We love a lot of other bands, we love a lot of different music, but when it comes to us playing, we just don’t care. It’s your ass. People think it’s arrogant, and it is. We believe in our craft. We believe in Slipknot.”

The voice of the madness perhaps

It’s the nature of madness – it’s always searching for a brave face.

Always changing…

…always the same

It seeks its own martyrdom…

…and to be reborn

Yeah, very fucking profound. Don’t get mad, get eaten.

You want to give food for thought?

It’s just for the food for the maggots.

Th-that’s all, folks.

Is it tough accepting the fact that you have to wear a mask for the next year? Joey: “No, not at all. I’m ecstatic to be back and playing with the guys again. It’s home, man. We take breaks because Slipknot is not just music, it’s a force, it’s a lifestyle. It’s also like being in jail. You’re constricted. You have to be on your game every night to be in this band. The stuff is not easy to play anyway, but we’ve got the whole stage performance, playing in masks, it’s what every band goes through, but with nine guys it’s very intense. I mean, look at this – all nine guys are still together. All nine original guys are still here. What other band can say that?”

So, has anybody ever tried to get out? Joey: “No, no one ever has. That’s why at the end of a 15-month tour cycle, we’re just like, let’s take a break, work on some other projects, just relieve a little stress. But when we come back to Slipknot, it’s on, man. There’s no fucking around.”

So what can we expect from this next tour? Clown: “For one thing, we’re musical, man. I play the fucking drums, so get used to it. I’ve earned the right, I’ve done the time, I’ve been on the mountain with the kung fu masters, learning. If you can’t accept that, go play with the kids’ toys. I’ve worked really hard on my art for this one. I got my boy-scout medals and I’m in the deep woods with no tools, no tent, no nothing, and we’re playing survival, man. Just know that I’m the guy who eats the fucking shit raw, man. If there’s an animal, I’ll fucking eat it. This is fucking Slipknot. That’s what you can fucking expect.”

Is Slipknot meant to last forever, or do you have to write the end of this story? Clown: “You nailed it, man. I am in more pain than anyone could possibly ever know, because I have to find a way to finish this.” Joey: “I don’t think it’s our last record at all, but there’s something seriously going on with this record, that’s for sure. It’s like Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter. It’s a climax.”

Is Slipknot like Kiss, where you could lose a member and just find somebody else to wear his mask? Clown: “No. If I left this band, we’d be done. If Joey Jordison left this band, we’d be done. All of us, if any of the guys in this band leave… See, it’s been out of our hands for a long time, since 1998. The world is just too dumb, too anti-art, to realise how important this is, to actually accept the truth that yes, if I left the band it’d be over. There could never be a drummer to replace me, man. We are The Nine. There is no one else.”

Nine long, tense, and occasionally violent hours later, Slipknot begin to slink out into the inky-black, dead-still Des Moines night. It’s a mere week until they begin headlining the Mayhem tour in the States, and that’s just the beginning. Once this album hits the streets, it is unlikely that any of them will see their homes again for at least a year, and probably longer. Although the band harbours the expected anxieties about their long-awaited return to the metal arena, the sprawling expansive All Hope Is Gone will probably be their biggest album ever. At this point the eldest members of the band are now approaching 40, while their fanbase still hovers around 18, and that’s the same sort of 18 Alice Cooper once sang about: the confused, angry, half-a-boy, half-a-man kind.

If any of The Nine hoped to escape their fates as the ringleaders of the tormented, those hopes are now dashed.

“Man, it’s fucking embarrassing,” Clown admitted earlier, when we asked him how it felt to be a dad playing teen-rage anthems.

“I’m just glad I’m not alone in this, with this fucking-metal-fucking-arena-rock-fucking-stage-pass-interview-fucking-photoshoot shit. I don’t care about it. Yes, my art has grown into a way of life, yes, there’s a lot of people that live their lives by it, but I’ve always told people, I don’t want to be on the cover of Metal Hammer, I want to be on the cover of National Geographic. I’ve always said that. I’m gonna be on the cover of Metal Hammer anyway, because that’s just what I fucking do. But I want to take you all on another journey, a fucking life journey, a painful journey. There’s a reason why Slipknot gets the people we get: because they’re lost. They’re lost, and they find their way to us. It’s like a cult, man,” he says, staring a hole right through us.

“A cult of fucking pain.”

There are those who say hope springs eternal. They have obviously never spent a day with Slipknot.

A Stitch In Time

A bluffer’s guide to The Nine.

92: Drummer Shawn Crahan and bassist Paul Gray begin playing in a band together.

95: Joey Jordison joins Shawn and Paul, form Meld with guitarists Donnie Steele and Josh Brainard, and singer Anders Colsefini.

96: Donnie leaves the band due to religious beliefs and is replaced by Craig Jones. Meld change their name to Slipknot and begin wearing grotesque make-up and costumes. Craig Jons switches to sampler and Mick Thomson joins on guitar. Slipknot release their first self-released album, Mate.Feel.Kill.Repeat., on Halloween.

97: Corey Taylor replaces Anders on vocals. Chris Fehn joins the band as percussionist. Slipknot start wearing their trademark boiler suits and numbers.

98: DJ Sid Wilson joins the band. They sign to Roadrunner Records.

99: On June 29, the band releases Slipknot, their ‘official’ debut album, and join the Ozzfest tour.

00: Slipknot is certified Platinum.

01: Slipknot release their second album, Iowa, and do the Ozzfest tour again.

02: The band take a break, Corey Taylor revives Stone Sour, Joey Jordison forms Murderdolls. Slipknot attempt to write a follow-up to Iowa, but struggle with inner-band conflicts. Rumours of the band’s imminent break-up start to circulate in the media.

03: Slipknot rally and begin recording new album with producer Rick Rubin.

04: Vol. 3: (The Subliminal Verses) is released. It quickly goes Platinum. Yet another Ozzfest tour follows.

06: Slipknot win their first Grammy award in the category of Best Metal Performance for Before I Forget. Voliminal: Inside The Nine, a self-produced DVD documentary, is released.

08: All Hope Is Gone released. Chaos ensues.

Project Revolution

Slipknot members are known for their many side projects. Here’s a crib sheet.

Stone Sour

Corey Taylor (vocals) Jim Root (guitar Stone Sour were formed back in 1992 by Corey Taylor and have existed in one form or another ever since. The alt-metal/grunge band have released two albums on Roadrunner Records (Stone Sour in 2002 and Come What(ever) May in 2006), and have been nominated for a Grammy award three times. The band are currently on hold in light of the new Slipknot record, but plans for a third album are in the works.

Murderdolls

Joey Jordison (drums (sic)) A horror-themed glam-punk band with a penchant for fishnet tights and make-up formed in 2002 by Joey Jordison, the Murderdolls also featured former Frankenstein Drag Queens frontman Wednesday 13. The band released their debut album, Beyond The Valley Of The Murderdolls in 2002 and played together sporadically over the next two years. The band are currently on hiatus, and when asked about the possibility of further recordings, Joey stated: “There might be another album. We’re thinking about it.”

Ministry, etc

Joey Jordison (drums) During his off-hours, Joey keeps busy by filling in on drums for several notable acts, including nu metal pioneers Korn, who he played with at the 2007 Download Festival, Metallica, (Download 2004), and Ministry, who he toured with in the summer of 2006.

DJ Starscream

Sid Wilson Sid Wilson’s day job is as a leading Jungle musician. As Starscream he’s released a host of singles and remixes on the Japanese label N20.

Dirty Little Rabbits

Shawn Crahan (drums) Shawn’s other side-project is a swirly mix of psychedelia and 90s style alt-rock. The band has yet to release an album. Dirty Little Rabbits supported Stone Sour on their 2006-07 US tour.

Dum Fux

Corey Taylor (guitar, vocals) A tongue-in-cheek cover band that plays everything from Flock Of Seagulls to The Stooges. Current status: active.

Audacious P

Corey Taylor (vocals, guitar) Perhaps the world’s only Tenacious D cover band. Currently on hiatus.

To My Surprise

Shawn Crahan (drums) A sun-dappled 60s rock-style band, To My Surprise were signed to Roadrunner Records and released their debut, self-titled album in 2003. It was executive produced by Rick Rubin. The band are on hiatus.

Roadrunner United

Joey Jordison (drums) Paul Gray (bass) Jim Root (guitar) This was a one-off album project put together to celebrate Roadrunner Records’ 25th anniversary. Roadrunner United featured 18 ‘supergroups’ made up of various Roadrunner alumni. Slipknot’s Joey, Jim and Paul played on several of the tracks, along with Type O Negative’s Pete Steele, King Diamond guitarist Andy LaRocque, and Cradle Of Filth bassist Dave Pybus, among others. The Roadrunner United album was released in 2005.

#slipknot #shawn crahan #corey taylor #joey jordison #interview #metal hammer summer 2008

[izzy-b-hands]

15 QUESTIONS FOR 15 FRIENDS

Tagged by @sherlockig, thank u Alexz!!

Under the cut bc I got wordy and rambly as per usual lol.

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

Kind of? In that I more or less named myself after Izzy from our flag lol. Not that I'm going to tell everyone I meet that, but it is a big part of why I stuck with it after trying it out (that, and I've always wanted a name that had the letter zed in it, silly as that may seem.)

One of my middle names (that I had been using as a first name for a few years) is after my grandfather and aunt who also have that name as their middle name.

My deadname was after an actress famous in the 90s (tho tbh my mum apparently didn't choose it for that, she chose it bc she didn't find out my gender until I was Out and then was like 'aw fuck I don't have a name for this situation' and went with the first one she saw in a book of names a nurse gave her. It was only after that she remembered the actress when I was like. 4. that she changed and started telling ppl it was after that instead.)

And technically Holden is after the book character, but mum never actually read that book (and after I described it to her, said she has no interest in doing so lmao), she just liked how the name sounded and that was the one solitary name she for sure had on hand when I was born apparently. Could have saved us all time had she just used that one for me anyway!

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

Couple of nights ago. I'm doing better abt missing my cat Nisha, but my phone will toss up compilations of pics of her to mark the year/month/etc and sometimes those still get me. It popped up just before I went to bed that night and I was already so tired that I just. broke down. Bc I know she's v loved and looked after w/my mum, but I do miss her goofy lil self a lot. She was my first cat that was given to me and meant to be mine alone, and there's something abt that first pet bond I guess.

3. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

Nope, and it's not a likely thing for me. I've said before that that happening would be in a very specific situation, wherein I'm with someone who wants to dedicate the rest of our lives to raising a child, or god forbid more than one, tho I think I'd max out at two if I managed one at all tbh (and that's not even getting into the very complex for me thing of would I want to actually be pregnant ever (probably not, absolutely terrified of dying in childbirth and don't see myself getting over that easily), we have the funds to make that happen (and give the kid a good life, not just a decent one or 'could have been worse' like my own), and we feel stable mentally, emotionally, and physically (as much as one can outside of Life Happening of course) bc having a kid means putting allll of that first for them, ahead of yourself. Or at least I think it should mean that lol.

But that situation is incredibly unlikely considering my bigger goal in life is to wind up being a third for multiple couples while also fucking any of my friends who are down for it in a big poly ENM sort of thing for lack of better/more detailed definition (I know it sounds unrealistic and maybe it is to a degree, almost definitely is lol.)

I can admit I just. don't want to uproot the life I've been trying so hard to build for myself in so many ways, to have kids. I'll happily help babysit the kids of any friends tho and be the fun uncle that buys them junk food and lets them stay up late to watch movies. I think that's about the level of parenting of any kind that I can handle for now (also tbh I burned out on parenting bc my family admits they parentified the fuck outta me with my three younger cousins. It by far could have been worse, but I spent my teens spending most of my days after school helping look after them from the newborn years and on. Unless my above uber specific scenario happens, then I've probably had my fill of parenting for my lifetime.)

4. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?

I played volleyball for a few years in elementary school, and we were made to participate in a multi-school track and field thing for most of middle school every year, but I was never amazing at them. Housemate and I have figured out I likely have undiagnosed asthma tho (turns out running or going out in too cold or hot weather shouldn't instantly make you gasp, struggle to breathe, and make you taste iron in your mouth, who the fuck knew? Not me, genuinely) so I think that might have a lot to do with it.

I also enjoy tennis and badminton and would love to try rugby, but I've never played any of those beyond a hobby with family/friends.

5. DO YOU USE SARCASM?

I do! Probably too much and not always in the best situations, but I've been working for years to hone when and where it should be used so I think/hope I'm a lot better with it than I was when I was younger. Tho even then, I did get adults who found it funny when I was sarcastic bc of how adult I seemed to a lot of them (their words, not mine lmao.)

6. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

I genuinely don't know. Usually I'm too busy running my script for meeting new ppl in my head and trying to maintain Common and Expected Etiquette to really notice much right away. I have found that after a bit of time/after the initial meeting has passed, I tend to notice colours ppl wear more often than others if I see them often enough, or hair colour. But I don't know if it counts towards this question at that point lol.

7. WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOUR?

Kinda blueish grey? Some ppl say it's too grey to be blue, others that it's too blue to be grey. I had a lady at the ND DOT freak out abt not being sure if I should have blue or grey on my ID a few years back, and she finally just told me to put blue so 'she could stop feeling so confused.' Was a weird day and the first time I realised apparently they really do have a blend of both colours, enough for it to be upsetting lmao.

8. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

I can't choose between the two; I like both! I also like mixing them together when I write (a scary story with a happy ending, an ending that seems happy but is actually terrifying, so on and so forth.)

9. ANY TALENTS?

Writing? Maybe, I always list it bc it's something I know how to do and to (usually) do decently well. I can sort of draw? But not well enough that I think 'talented' would be accurate to describe how I draw lol. I'm not sure of anything else off the top of my head tbh.

10. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

In California, USA! We were there bc dad was in basic training for the Marines and then just got stuck at Camp Pendleton for years lmao (or that's how he always talks abt it anyway lmao.) Only was actually there until either: a. I was 3 months old, b. I was 6 months old or c. I was actually basically still a fresh newborn. Depends on whether you're talking to my dad, mum, or grandparents as to which answer you get, and at this point I'm genuinely uncertain as to exactly when mum left and took me to North Dakota but 6 months seems the most potentially accurate lmaooo.

11. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

Writing, drawing, reading (not enough but I'm trying to remedy that), napping, watching movies/fave shows, and giffing.

12. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?

Kind of? My cat Nisha had to stay in North Dakota after I moved, so my mum and her bf are looking after her now (and got her a little sister, a kitten who is getting so big already!, named Bella.) I help Housemate look after aer two cats as well, and I'd like to think the boys consider me like their fun uncle lol (aka I bend over backwards for them and let them steal my spot on the couch all the time, and will break out the treats if needed to corral them now and then. In my defense: they are the cutest lil baby boy cats and they deserve the world, even when they're being little gremlins lmao.)

13. HOW TALL ARE YOU?

Approximately somewhere between 5'3 and 5'4ish? I can't recall the last time I was actually measured, and most of the ppl I've been around were somewhere between those heights and I'm usually either slightly shorter or slightly taller than some of them, so??? I put 5'3 on my ID tho lol

14. FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?

English bc it was easy and I liked almost everything we did in that class. All my general and more specific history courses were a close second, and my foreign language classes a close third.

15. DREAM JOB?

Ideally, I'd love to not have to work. But who wouldn't, so that said, probably something in a library or museum. I'd love to be a library page again, or help work the front desk/docent duties of a museum. Working at someplace like Mystic Seaport would be amazing too; I'd be happy to learn how to help repair/repaint ships that come in or just help do tours or look after artifacts and stuff (tbh they could hire me just to type up any random data entry work they need done for any/all depts and I'd say yes to the job offer lol.) Unfortunately there's fairly significant roadblocks to me achieving any of these jobs rn, but I like to keep them in mind, just in case.

Also, if I can have one dream job that would be even more unlikely and is slightly TMI probably but: paid third for a rich couple. I show up, look nice, [redacted], make sure they're both good for the night, then go back home to Housemate (if it wouldn't be a night they'd want me to stay over, which I wouldn't be against but also. That would require some overtime pay lol.) The chances of this one are...so unlikely it's stupid funny, but a man's allowed to have dreams right lmao?

Tagging (if u guys wanna, no obligation if u don't wanna/have already been tagged/etc!!): @starmoonchildfromthebeamsabove, @freebooter4ever, @willowenigma, @turtleduck-tales, @mash1972, @mysteriouslybluepirate, @turtles-on-turts, @cononeillbreastingboobily, @treesofgreen, @dianetastesmetal, @arsenicflame, @gydima, @king-bussy, @p0ochy, @crvwly, and anyone else following me who wants to!

#text post #ask box things #or adjacent to that at least lol #long post #tagging w/that to be safe bc I am stoned and wordy rn #apolgoies for that and kudos if you read the whole thing lol #I admit im not sure who all has already been tagged so apologies if anyone i tagged has already done this recently fjlsadkfjsla #if u have or if ur just not feeling it pls don't feel obligated! #tbh this is one of the first times in awhile where I had more ppl i wanted to tag than the expected amount and i almost just tagged everyon #but then i was like. hm. ill do the expected fifteen and offer it up to anyone else too in case anyone else feels like doing this! #probably for the best since this post is already so long im so sorry u guys fjkalsfjdsklj

[squidkid15]

Core AU

This shit’s gonna be LONG so lets do this. 

So Basically

Core AU is less of an AU and is instead more of the name me and @lotusmonkey came up with for our RP. It’s canon adjacent/continuation taking place after the end of season 3 and includes all of those events as well as as many headcanons as we can possibly cram into it. It’s really kind of impressive how many we keep shoving in there as we go. It’s ever evolving and we keep adding more and retroactively making things important. 

We’re just having fun. 

It’s not all that cohesive, we think of fun plots and go YEEAAHHHH and shove them in there and play it out. There’s a vague through thread in that it all happens in order to the same monkeys, but that’s about it. 

Characters

Okay so it’s mostly Macaque and Wukong, MK also plays a big role but we really focused on the two monkies. 

Important to note, this is NOT a shadowpeach AU. They are incredibly close now that they’ve patched things up and would do anything for each other, but there’s nothing romantic between them.

Macaque (I play him hi) is if you took canon mac and made him just a bit less angry and a whole lot more abandonment issues. Snarky bastard, more or less on the good side but only because that’s where Wukong is. All he ever really wanted was to go back to how things were before he and Wukong had their big fight, and now that he’s gotten that (more on that later) he’s pretty much mellowed out. He’s still an ass (and he knows it) but he’s not out to get anyone, other than rib Wukong at every change he gets (but its more playful than biting now). He’s very much of the “i’ll do whatever i want and fuck you if you disagree” but luckily for the rest of the cast, what he wants generally aligns with what they want. He’s back by Wukong’s side again so he’s pretty happy there. So, unfortunately, he hasn’t gotten much chance to be a huge pain in the ass lately. I miss his sarcasm.

He’s a demon through and through, with his “true form” (second pic) being mostly made of shadows and a whole lot more spooky than normal. He uses layers upon layers of different kinds of glamor magics he’s developed over the centuries to basically erase that form, he hasn’t even seen himself look like that in centuries. 

We lean HARD into the ‘mage macaque’ narrative, no one can match him in terms of magic alone. Getting into a fistfight with him isn’t fun either, but he’s mostly magic and brains. Can talk his way out of just about anything, we keep using the word ‘battlemaster’. He’s the thinker and the planner, and he and Wukong both know it. 

Good actor also. That’s come up a couple times. 

His core was broken when he died, and the resurrection put it back together enough for him to live, but it wasn’t healed (that comes later). A touch of Wukong’s magic runs up the side of it and deep through it, from how close they were when they were younger. A splash of LBD’s magic runs through the front and to the right, mimicking where the ice was. The gold (that comes from much later in the rp) that mended it is inspired by Kintsugi. It broke, and it broke badly, but was eventually mended once more. 

He has the very unique ability to interact with Cores on a physical level. It’s a very rare ability in the AU, and even among those rare few Macaque has incredibly fine control over it. He can give and take magic from them, rip them free, put them back, etc. We don’t do much with it too often, but it’s VERY important when it does come up. 

He got his past & future hearing back fairly early in the RP (lost it when he died) and since then no longer hides the six ears unless he has a reason to. 

Also he’s just. Full on cat. I think he purred once.

Wukong (played by Hawk/ @lotusmonkey ) is if you took canon Wukong but held together by ducktape, MK, Macaque, and at least seven prayers. This man needs SO much therapy. He’s really good at hiding this fact, however (to everyone but Macaque) and instead puts on a really good carefree front. Pretty confident in himself in the moment and when things work out, but he’ll second guess himself pretty quick if they go to shit. He’ll rib back at Macaque at every opportunity, and we’ve made several jokes about him tackling Mac from across the room. He’s super protective, especially over MK and Macaque, and will get himself brutally injured in a heartbeat if it means keeping the others safe.

He has like 0 sense of self preservation. After centuries of getting injured in new and brutal ways it really doesn’t phase him anymore. He knows nothing can kill him, and has decided it’d be a nice surprise if something ended up managing it. 

He’s super attached to his glamors, and will not go around without them under any circumstances. There has been one time in the RP where he dropped them willingly, and it was for only in one spot and only a couple minutes. There was another time where he was forced to drop ALL of them for an extended period of time, and it took a pretty big toll on him. 

He sees MK as a son, though he doesn’t admit it out loud, and is unbelievably proud of him and everything he’s accomplished. Again, very protective of him and will do anything to keep him safe while also helping him unlock his powers to the fullest. 

He’s very happy to have Macaque back in his life and on good terms once more, and has promised to ‘never leave him behind again’. For better or for worse, they’re sticking to this. Calls Macaque his ‘battle brother’ and ‘best friend’ and means it. 

The weight of being ‘Monkey King’ rests heavily on him, with all the expectations to have all the answers and fixes and having to be perfect at all times. Tired of the weight of the world on his shoulders, but has also more or less accepted that he doesn’t have much of a choice in the matter, despite how miserable it makes him. 

He needs a lot of hugs. 

MK has a bit less screentime/building time than the other two, but he’s just as important in most of the story. He’s much the same as in the show, but maybe a bit calmer/more responsible. Hawk and I both play him depending on which monkey he’s talking to at the time, but its primarily Hawk. He’s still a good kid, and shares Wukong’s wildly protective nature, for both monkies. He sees them both (and the rest of the gang) as family, and would do anything for any of them. 

He’s very curious, always excited to learn more about how something works or about a new power and magic, and eager to try it right away. 

His powers are a bit more of a combination of the two monkies, he sees them both as his mentors even if Macaque would deny it and Wukong would be wildly offended. His powers are much more adaptable, so he he actually has a mix of the two of them. All of Wukong’s strength and resilience, but after the first event in the RP (more on that later) he’s gained the ability to tap into some of Macaque’s powers as well, including eventually his ability to interact with cores. 

We turned him into a monkey very early on (yes, turned into) but he’s taking it well. Macaque and Wukong taught him glamor magic immediately after so he could look like his old self if he wanted to once more. 

The more he gets to know Wukong on a personal instead of student/teacher level, the more he’s slowly starting to see beneath Wukong’s mask and just how much of a mess he is beneath it all, and is working on trying to figure out how best to fix it. 

Cores

The namesake of the AU, cores are the biggest difference/headcanon that really defines how the AU plays out, and a whole lot of the plot points. The biggest separation from canon and the AU is cores and how we treat them and interact with them in the AU.

Cores are, essentially, souls. Every being has them, but immortals are several times the size of a mortals because they also double as a magic source/storage. They are pure magic, not a physical entity like an organ, though they are just as essential. 

A soul is everything a person is. Thoughts, feelings, personality, etc. To immortals, they are also a power source. A finite (but very large) pool of magic from which immortals draw upon for magic. Some immortals tap into theirs more than others, it all depends on their magic. Macaque uses his far more than Wukong, for example, because Macaque uses far more magic. He opens portals, summons shadows, forms shadows into things, etc. All of these tap into his core. Sort of like a mana pool in a video game. Wukong, on the other hand, hardly ever taps into his. He’s far more physical, and will instead punch or kick instead of using magic. 

Cores can be depleted through various means. It could be as simple as using too much magic before there’s time for it to regenerate (very rare, there is VAST amounts of magic in a core, naturally burning it all down is almost unheard of) or something draining it (which we have toyed with a few times in different ways). Draining a core is dangerous, but not fatal until and unless they are drained dry. Recovery is as simple as not using magic and resting for some time. If the mechanism to deplete a core is a bit more violent, it can sometimes take some time before using magic feels normal again, and can even be painful if too much is used too soon. 

Cores can also be broken (different from being drained). Cores can only be broken by magical means, or the death of the body. A core breaks naturally in death, but can also be the cause (as was Macaque’s). A broken core is fatal. 

Cores can crack or be damaged over time, and this is actually fairly common in immortals. The cracks don’t do any real tangible damage to the core, but is a sign of some sort of trauma. Either to the core directly, or emotional/mental can be a cause as well. 

They’re...sort of nebulously physical. They aren’t a physical thing like an organ, there is no space in the chest for them and they aren’t there after death. They’re entirely magical, but do have an appearance (Wukong and MK can see them with gold vision/true sight). Each one looks different to each person in color/design. They only gain a physical form when one is given to them by some sort of magic designed to interact with them. A weapon that has been enchanted to target the core specifically can touch a core (in my head they have a similar texture/material to those solid glass ball knickknacks). Macaque can also give them a more physical form because of his ability to remove them. Once removed they can be held by others, but it’s only after Macaque has given them a form. It makes sense in my head but as soon as I put it on paper it sounds a bit silly lmao. 

Plot

It’s ongoing, like I said, because we just keep thinking of fun new things to add to it and we’re planning like 15 plot points ahead of where we’ve already written, but the barebones of where we’ve gone so far:

1. MK saves Macaque & Macaque saves MK

This whole thing actually started as just a one-off idea & RP (as you do) and was meant to just explore an idea. But now we’re almost a month into a single throughplot. But the original idea was based on mage mac and how he relies much more heavily on magic to run than MK or Wukong, who have just their 7 kinds of immortality. MK and Macaque being trapped somewhere that sapped their magic (we later decided they got kidnapped when MK delivered noodles to Mac’s place, sorta retconned in the “how”), Macaque’s a lot faster than MK. MK manages to hold out/make it easier on Macaque for as long as he can, until they’re both on death’s door. When he’s basically out, he offers his core to Macaque to take, break, and use it to save himself (like how he does when they first meet, but more willingly and a bit more desperate). 

Mac, who has since grown a bit fond of MK, does something slightly different. He still takes some of the power from MK’s core to open a portal and get them both out of there, but doesn’t break it. Instead, when he pulls it out, MK turns to stone. 

Wukong shows up at this point, having felt them arrive on his mountain and sees Mac like seven eights dead and MK turned to stone trying to protect him. He’s Not Happy but after a bit of explaining from Mac, doesn’t take it out on him. Instead, to reverse it, Macaque acts as a conduit to recharge MK’s core using Wukong’s. One hand on Wukong’s, one hand on MKs, letting the power move through him to charge MK’s core enough that it’s no longer in any danger. Mac struggles with the urge to just crush Wukong’s core right then and there because they’re still on terrible terms. He resists. The stone cracks, MK is saved, but is now monkey after getting a direct shot of Wukong’s magic (this is also where MK picks up his ability to use some of mac’s powers). 

Head back to the mountain for some recovery time, teaching MK how to glamor. Wukong and Mac snark at each other over it. Eventually they break into an argument about Macaque’s death - turns out Wukong had no idea Macaque died. He thought macaque went off on his own after their fight to stew and wanted nothing to do with Wukong again. Macaque was killed by a third party immediately after the fight, soon enough that he thought it was Wukong. They make up (maybe a bit quick, if I could go back and rewrite I would maybe make it take longer, but thats just me and we were excited to get to the fun of them being buddies again. Like I said, this is mostly for fun instead of a cohesive plot)  and make a Very Important promise. 

"I.. I can't go back, I can't change it. But.. I won't leave you behind. Never again."

“I'm going to hold you to that this time. For better or for worse, you're not leaving me behind again."

Mac finishes recovering, MK takes a bit longer because he was so much more damaged.

2. Storming heaven & the mayor

Turns out, while mac and MK were captured and being drained like batteries, Wukong was running around interrogating people trying to figure out where the fuck his rival and kid ended up. He gets a few vague leads before they manage to escape on their own.

During the recovery, before he and Mac made up, Wukong was periodically popping in and out to continue his hunt for answers. After they make up, Wukong stays true to his word and doesn’t leave Mac behind. Once he’s all better, however, they’re off. One of the leads Wukong found was that the assassination attempt was orchestrated by someone up in the celestial realm itself, and he and Macaque go kicking in their door (very literally) for answers. 

They get a couple. The attempt on Mac’s life was because heaven saw him and Wukong working together in the battle against LBD and feared what would happen with the two of them together once more. The attempt on MK’s life was because they feared a second Wukong, and some calamity he was supposed to bring (foreshadowing go BRRRRR). The mechanism of the attempt on their lives is something (we made up) called the Dark Ravine. Some ancient thing that was used to kill immortals, drained the magic out of them. It hasn’t been used for some time. 

They also find that one of heaven’s court is infected with...something. They don’t know what it is. But the noble keels over half-dead after muttering some ominous nonsense. Mac and Wukong are understandably a bit wigged out, as is the rest of the court. Ne’Zha (who we again passed back and fourth, but usually ended up being me) is assigned to join them on their quest to figure out what the hell happened. They leave with more questions than answers.

They keep searching, busting in more doors in both the celestial and mortal realms. After one such dead end in the mortal realm, the three of them are attacked by the not-mayor, who appears to have a new master. Macaque and Wukong beat him up pretty good (Ne’Zha stays out to evacuate some civilians because the two of them is already wildly overkill) until Macaque stumbles, his core flaring up after so much intense use so soon after it was damaged. The Mayor tries to take advantage of this, going for Macaque, but Wukong takes the hit instead. Immediately after, the mayor makes his exit with some cryptic words. 

3. Sick Wukong & the shadow

They keep going, Macaque notices the hit seems to be bothering Wukong some but Wukong plays it off well enough that Mac sorta forgets. Keep searching, Macaque pushes Wukong into a river at one point when they stop for the night. It’s very cute. Water wars part one. 

We do a lot of timeskipping at this point as the 3 go around. At one point Wukong astral projects to check on MK. He’s still doing good, the rest of the gang came up to the mountain to hang out.

Wukong slowly starts to slow down, acting sick. He goes from being the first person awake to the last one, and he’s just not all there. Very cold, and Mac starts to notice and get worried. Before he can really properly bring it up, however, they’re attacked again. 

This time, but some broken, twisted Shadow Macaque. It looks like one of his clones, but it’s all sorts of messed up. It gets a couple really good hits on Wukong, and is definitely targeting him, more or less ignoring Macaque and Ne’Zha. One of the hits rips Wukong’s glamors (& hoodie, he slept in a hoodie and they were attacked pretty early in the morning) and reveals a big black crack looking thing over his chest, where the mayor hit him. He’s Not Doing Good, so Macaque and Ne’Zha have to try and protect him. 

The shadow thing, turns out, is using Mac’s lantern as a core/power source, but Macaque can’t get to it without risk of being infected the same way they now know Wukong was. Wukong, being the self sacrificing idiot he is, uses himself as bait to give Mac an opening to rip the lantern free, but Wukong gets really badly injured in the process. Now with his old weapon in hand, Mac’s more or less unstoppable and crushes the shadow before rushing to check on Wukong. 

4. Mac’s turn in the blender

Right after he gets there, a portal opens beneath him and Wukong. It’s some twisted thing, one he almost recognizes (black center & blue fire ring), and it drops them both in the ruins of LBD’s mech. Snowy cold and big chunks of metal scattered everywhere, very cool image. They got separated in the portal travel, and Mac starts hunting for Wukong. 

Wukong, meanwhile, is REALLY not doing good. The attacks from the shadow made the infection worse, and he’s basically delirious. The mayor (the one who portaled them) finds him before Mac does, and starts dragging him off to Somewhere ( :) ). 

Mac keeps searching, and eventually finds the both of them in the center of the ruins of the mech. Big, empty circle where the butt of the staff crushed everything under it. In the center there’s the furnace, and the mayor dragging a very limp Wukong towards it. 

Mac jumps in to protect Wukong, and it....doesn’t go well. 

The mayor’s new master is the ravine (which is sorta weirdly semi-sentient, enough to make plans but all it really wants is to feed on magic) and he’s working with it in order to eliminate the major threats that thwarted his lady, getting them out of the way so he can can continue her work. Part of that agreement is that the mayor gets some...upgrades. The ravine has already chewed on a decent chunk of Mac’s power (where the shadow came from, and where the mayor got the almost-familiar portal) as well as MK’s and now Wukong’s (from the infection). And the mayor got some of those powers in order to help deliver the entirety of the monkey’s cores to the ravine.

Mac gets flattened. 

He’s broken in all of the places in only a couple hits, and the mayor goes back to trying to melt Wukong down again. Mac manages to talk the mayor into trying to kill mac first, with the plan that he could portal away from the inside of the furnace without the mayor ever knowing. 

Unfortunately, the furnace acts as a sort of nullifier, and mac’s magic doesn’t work inside it. Wukong woke up enough to see Mac getting dropped in and panics hard enough to basically nuke the area, blowing up anything that could be used to light the furnace and damaging the mayor enough that he leaves to recuperate. He knocks himself the fuck out when he nukes the place, and the mayor gives him a solid kick in anger before leaving, really messing his chest up.

Mac has no idea this has happened, the furnace is completely soundproof, and he’s stuck with the sound of himself alone. 

Ne’Zha, meanwhile, has started searching for the monkies after they dropped through a portal that didn’t seem too intentional - Mac left the lantern behind. After coming up empty each time, he contacts MK in the hopes that they had gone back to him. This, in turn, freaks MK out and he and Ne’Zha meet up to go track the monkies down. Combining his gold vision with the magic in Mac’s lantern, MK manages to lead them to the monkies. They see the remains of Mac’s fight with the mayor and are Immediately worried because there’s a whole lot of blood. They see Wukong first and fret over him before the furnace starts yelling to MK again (like it did telling him to stop in the show) and they find Mac. 

In the time it took for Ne’Zha to find MK and for them to arrive at the furnace, it’s given Macaque his past & future hearing back. (the reasoning being that it gave wukong sight, and talked to MK, we were wondering what it would do for Mac). Mac hasn’t had this power in centuries, and he’s beyond overwhelmed by hearing everything all at once as well as how broken he is from the fight.

They manage to get the monkies home, but it’s not fun for anyone. 

5. Fever Wukong Arc (tm)

Ne’Zha borrows a healer from heaven to at least get the monkies off death’s doorstep, but there’s only so much they can do because they don’t know what’s wrong with Wukong, and Macaque is VERY broken. 

They spend a few days unconscious, and eventually Mac wakes up first. MK gives him some pretty heavy duty earmuffs to block out most of the sounds because Mac is in Sensory Hell while he can’t control this power, and doesn’t talk for a while because its too loud. 

Wukong takes a lot longer to wake up, and he’s barely there for most of it. He’s deep in the fever and super delirious, it’s not very often he’s fully aware. He accidentally reveals some Trauma in his haze, and his glamors are forced to drop when the infection drags on his magic too much. Macaque actually has to forcefully remove them because Wukong would have killed himself trying to hang on to them and fighting the infection like that. He doesn’t take it well. 

Macaque and MK start looking for a cure in Wukong’s library, but find exactly no information on the ravine anywhere. They do, however, find information on a forest (that we made up) that will answer any question you ask of it, assuming you can pass its trial. They start banking on this being their best bet to save Wukong, because he’s actively dying. 

And he knows it. 

Macaque knows it too, but he’s Very Deep in denial.

As of the time of writing this, we’re in the middle of a bittersweet fluffy moment where Mac and Wukong are grooming each other and Macaque is talking about the stupid shit they’ll get up to when Wukong gets better. 

The last reply is from Hawk, and Wukong is humoring him asking about where they’ll go as he’s actively passing out and his heartbeat is slowing. 

And that’s as far as we’ve gotten. 

:)

#lmk #lego monkie kid #lmk au #lego monkie kid au #lmk core au #lmk sun wukong #lmk macaque #lmk mk #lmk ne'zha #doodles #drabbles #squid speaks #and we have so much future stuff planned #im SO excited

[alwaysxyou]

Oh I wish you wouldn't withhold your thoughts on this disaster - yours is one of the voices I trust most on these issues because you are generally quite balanced and positive in your opinions, and because you also have actual professional experience in this field. As a casual observer this leaves such a bad taste in my mouth for both Florence and H and I can't believe how easily so many people are participating in this narrative.

that story is making me feel spicy so here ya go! 

things i "know" (aka have been told by people who are close to it that i trust)

jason and o were fine and her breaking it off with him came out of nowhere. he was blindsided

she broke it off with jason because of the stunt (i dont know WHEN that officially happened aka how long before we saw it)

it's well known industry-wide that their relationship is fake

it's well known industry-wide that harry is LGBTQ (and less well known, but still well known, that harry has a long term partner)

it’s very common for movie campaigns to try to make it seem like your main two actors are a thing. i was on a campaign once where they tried to do it (i refused to help on it, as much as i had a say at the time). it was not successful anyways lol no one cared 

things i assume:

i firmly believe o is a textbook narcissist

o received a ton of press after booksmart, which did really well. but a lot of the angle was that she is a great indie and niche director and i can easily see this pissing her off if she wanted to be considered a mainstream director

which led to the deal she made when she sold the movie (i know this was confirmed but i dont remember the source) - once the movie hit a certain level of profit, she (and the creative team) would then directly start receiving profits. which means that nothing about the movie or how it’s received or awards or anything matters - the only thing she is focused on is box office success 

florence signing on after o’s success with booksmart makes sense to me. it’s the niche of movies florence thrives in for her non-mainstream picks. i think she had no idea what was going to happen. 

and this shows in how she’s protecting and respecting harry - no on set posts, not a lot of chatter about it on her socials compared to other movies, etc 

harry was a move to get the mainstream success. obviously i think he’s wildly talented and completely qualified, but it’s known he’ll bring the big money 

i think o knew how much press a fake relationship in the cast brings in. and her wanting the spotlight on her always makes sense why she picked herself (and why she has a role in the movie too) 

i go back and forth about if it was supposed to last this long, and my thought usually steers to not. i think o got press hungry once she saw how much pickup it could get 

i have from the start thought that o and her team control the stunt, as opposed to h. there are certain textbook pattern things i think they suggest or say h will do, because he’s familiar with the pattern and it’s safer. it worked out that it covers for his long term lovey dovey songs, but i do not think that was originally the plan

there is usually a Lot of press around any of h’s fake relationships, but not to the level of “sources” that there are this time - which points me even more to thinking it’s o’s team

the fake harry was a plant from h’s team so he didn’t have to do shit, and any fan pics or sightings that you cant clearly see his face are the plant. 

o has no idea how grammar works why the fuck doesnt the title have a comma

this is all i can think of right now because my mind is REELING from that story 

#asks #anon #stunts tw #also you are very very sweet i appreciate the compliments dear #delete later

[wonhosmistress]

Aphrodisia;Prologue

(NSFW)

Word Count: 1,196

Warnings: Slight mention of Kinks, sexual BDSM themes, sex work, and lastly, TW! toxic-ish relationship mentions. Think I missed some? Lmk and send me a dm, I'll update this.

A/N:I have no IDEA how long this took for me finish because I’ve been teasing this series for a couple months with the only two teasers I mentioned of Hyunjin. Seems I have a lot of sub!Hyunjin enthusiasts because same y’all. 😩I promise to finish the Hyunjin before June ends and after that I’ll focus more on other members.

Anyways! This is the prologue enjoy this unfiltered, unedited, there will be hella grammar mistakes and I don’t plan to edit it because it’s too much work and I honestly just want to post ASAP. It’s been far too long since I’ve written and had any sort of inspo to write. Thanks to my dear mutual @nirvanawrites111 she gave me hella inspo with her amazing works!! I’m obsessed with her writing please go do me a favor and read her amazing stories/fics.

Also I tried to add the read more on mobile but I’m a dumbass and idk how to work tumble mobile sometimes lmao. So I apologize for anyone that will see this and doesn’t want to see it.

As a result of unsuccessful relationships and partners being concerned about where she went or what she was doing, she became more secretive about her whereabouts. Even though she wanted to be honest and open with them, she hesitated on many occasions; if she were to be bold and unapologetic they would go insane and ask questions like, "Why did you choose this job out of all the others?", "Are you cheating on me?", etc.

Those tiresome scenarios were one of the reasons she was always the one that broke it off with them, and so she took it upon herself to take a break from her dating life to focus on herself.

She had a job that wasn't just any regular job.

OnlyFans? No

Camgirl? No.

A phone Sex worker? No.

Feet pics? No.

Used panties? No

For her working at night was ideal because her sleeping schedule only allowed her to be a night owl. Even before any partner appeared in her life she was still in the process of discovering a whole new part of herself that she wasn't aware existed, and here she was in a dungeon that she had been hired at over a year ago and was one of the few popular dommes among the clients.

"How are you feeling?", She stood next to the man sitting on the loveseat.

"I'm good, Mistress." He smiled at her.

"Would you like some water?" He nodded in response.

She walked towards the room next door and back to the playroom to hand him the bottle.

She crouched down to his level to face him as well to check in with him, "How are you feeling? Was it too much?", she asked curiously as to how she could improve. What she should've done is saved that question for the head domme but she didn't and took the risk.

"No. Not at all. It was perfect, I enjoyed every second of it."

He faced her smiling at him and held her hand realizing he shouldn't be doing that.

"I'm sorry...may I?" She smiled warmly at him not pulling her hands away from his grasp.

"I just wanted to say thank you."

While she had not broken skin or drawn blood, she still left a few red welts on him. She grabbed the first aid kit in the corner and treated his wounds, trying to be as gentle as possible.

"No need to thank me. You went out of your way to give it a shot when you could've easily backed out and I would've still respected your decision. BDSM isn't everyone's cup of tea and so we've learned to respect everyone's decision."

She applied a first-aid ointment to every single red mark on his back; he hissed at the lightest touch, "I'm sorry, I know it hurts I'm just trying to make sure these heal quickly and nicely."

"I know and I appreciate it."

"Done." She stood up and handed him his T-shirt. "Make sure to take a warm bath or shower after you get home and keep applying ointment on the marks afterward.

He smiled at her making his way toward the exit.

"Will do.",

She smiled at him and nodded, seeing him off.

That was one of the roughest BDSM scenes she had done in a while. She would like to take time to make sure her submissive didn't go into a sub-drop, but sadly she couldn't. If it were her, she would go out of her way to remain with every submissive for a bit longer. However, her boss had to remind her that they only came here for a service nothing more. Because of this, she couldn’t be there for more than ten to fifteen minutes with her clients after their sessions ended.

~~~~~

"See you tomorrow night!" Her boss told her as they both headed in different directions.

She silently walked for the next couple of four blocks by herself and finally got closer to her apartment. She walked up the stairs and opened the door to her place. The second she got in she took off her shoes left them at the entrance and hung her purse on the rack.

Exhausted and couldn't even begin to explain how she felt after handling four subs back to back today. It was not an ideal situation for her couldn't handle more than two subs a day because her anxiety and insecurities kept creeping back up on her.

She meditated, journaled, exercised, and even set days apart for self-care plus, she detoxed from her constant electronic use. She ate healthily and did her best to keep her homey environment clean and organized. However, regardless of what she did something inside her told her she couldn't keep doing this.

She craved something new and stable.

She loved domming but maybe because of all her ex-partner's insecurities of themselves as she hid her true identity was reflecting on herself.

Could it be that deep inside she was ashamed of her job and what she did?

Years ago when she discovered the person she truly was glowed with confidence. How could she even be a dominatrix if she wasn't sure of herself and her current job?

Oh no.

She was experiencing not only her anxieties but also a dom drop.

Telling her boss; she was fine could've been a mistake because she was responsible for taking care of her dommes since half of them didn't have a partner to take care of them.

Fuck.

~~~~~

Two years Later:

Two years and a half of learning Korean were a big help during the entire process of her moving across the world. She wasn't fluent yet but could manage conversations with her neighbors, classmates, and strangers. And so here she was, sitting inside a cafe shop a couple of blocks from the Korean class she had just finished attending.

It seemed like only yesterday, she was experiencing the worst anxiety and burnout from only a year of working as a domme which was odd considering that she had never once felt like that before. But it made sense since she kept getting the gnawing feeling that she shouldn't have gotten into the dominatrix world way too early and so she took it upon herself to resign to take time for herself; and continue her future as domme by researching more information about the career, lifestyle, and possibly a new business.

The grueling work of research, language learning, space vacancy, furniture shop, etc made her take a step back and reconsider if she could do this all by herself. Thankfully, after taking a couple of weeks to continue her research she found herself posting on an exclusive adult site looking for dommes to work with her.

After returning calls and doing interviews she had successfully found four dommes who wanted to continue their careers in the kink community and so never once she thought, that she out of all people would be involved with any of Korea's music industry. Especially the ever so sexually frustrated men of Kpop that had an image and reputation to uphold in the industry, their companies, and not to forget their fans.

#sub!kpop #ximes’ 💭 #ximes’ inferno #sub!idol #Aphrodisia

[maxverstepponme]

steppy. more photos of charles & alex on vacation dropped and people are being crazy 😭

they’re going on and on about how it must be pr. now, yes, there have been times f1 couples called the paps themselves (KELLY!!! and charlotte come to mind, there were sus ones of kika and pierre too) but i don’t think this is one of those scenarios… so here’s me attempting to debunk. this is going to be VERY LONG so grab a snack and get comfy lol:

first of all. charles is the pr prince(ss) when it comes to racing related things/media and sponsors. he does NOT play about his sponsors. he rushes immediately after a race to put all of his sponsored jewelry on no matter what and he is always wearing those damn meta glasses. he takes those sponsorships SERIOUSLY. if he knew that there was going to be paparazzi, i sincerely doubt, as a long time charles fan who knows how seriously he takes brand deals, he would wear one of their biggest rival’s biggest sponsors. like he could wear any other swimsuit and you’re trying to tell me that on the one day that he apparently paid the paps to be there he chose that one out of all of them 💀 like bffr his ass had no idea they were coming!

and that wasn’t even me getting into the at least 5-6 times straight off the top of my head the times that charles said how much he hates how his personal life is in the spotlight, hates how f1 drivers are treated outside of the race track now too (speaking again of his personal/private life and how it’s in the spotlight now), hates how his relationship [w/ charlotte] was so public (he said this in nov 2022 so it was after they broke up probably but before they announced it), and he even said that while being an f1 driver is his dream, he wishes he could disappear in public. does that SOUND like a man who would pay paps to take pics of him or who would allow his girlfriend or friends to pay paps to take pics???

another reason why they claim these are paid is because of the anti-pap laws in france. fair enough point on surface level but if you look into it… um no. yes, they were in corsica where the photos were taken. HOWEVER! the photos were PUBLISHED in an italian magazine. now the french law states that you aren’t allowed to publish, or even take, photos of people without consent, but does this stop people? nope! how many times have you seen photos of your favorite celebrities in paris from random people and in gossip magazines and whatnot? so if they can’t enforce it then, what the hell makes these people think they’ll enforce it on some random magazine from italy? the answer is that they probably won’t unless charles himself takes action, but that’s a long process and it’s expensive and chances are not much would even happen because the photos are already out there now, and if celebrities could just sue paps and get rid of them forever… NEWS FLASH! THEY WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY! 😱

also another bit of information on the “anti-pap laws”. this is literally one of the very first things that pops up when you look up anti paparazzi laws in france. if these gossip pages or the anons on them bothered to do any research they would have seen it but obviously they don’t. “according to jamie nordhaus, although the french government set strong laws to prevent paparazzi from invading celebrity privacy, these laws counteract each other. they, thus, are not efficient enough to protect celebrities and their children.” mind you, jamie nordhaus is a professional attorney with 20 years of experience  in laws to do with licensing and the exploitation of things to do with licensing (*cough* like paparazzi photos *cough*) and how to protect clients against these exploitations. simple google search tells us this. if an attorney with 20 years of experience to do with things in this topic, along with my common sense, says that these laws aren’t helpful, i believe her more than i believe user ihatealexstmlx on instagram, thanks!

the only thing i’m questioning is the clearness of the photos but 🤷‍♀️ if your whole job is to take photos of people from a distance you’d probably have a good camera to do it no? and you can also literally see the shrubs of bushes and crap in front of the camera lol if they were paid to be there and everybody knew they’d be there why would they hide in the bushes like what? another thing i thought might have been suspicious was that they were in a private villa with no close neighbors, but the more i thought about it the more i realized that wasn’t a good point. you can see in the ad charles posted for le collectionist (where the villa they stayed in was from) how intensely and violently the waves lap against the beach. that was NOT safe to swim in! so they probably were at a public beach in those photos or at least a much more accessible place that wasn’t right in front of their villa, and therefore probably easier to get to for unauthorized paparazzi [**I’M RESENDING JUST TO ADD THAT MORE PHOTOS WERE RELEASED AND YES, THEY WERE AT A PUBLIC AND POPULAR BEACH WHERE IT WOULD NOT BE HARD TO GET TO OR BLEND IN**] … just saying. that’s all :)

.

[prettyoddfever]

i don’t know if you keep up with panic now, but did you see that the pre split band was sort of mentioned in brendon’s new single local god? If you know about this, who do you think the song is about?

I figured the song just sounds like Brendon's reflecting on someone who once played a part in his life (possibly even a version of himself if you want to read it that way). I'm def not saying the song is about Jacob Kirkegard or anything, BUT give me a second to explain more about Jacob just to show how lyrics are so open to interpretation.

So we started seeing pictures in early 2007 of Brendon and Jacob hanging out (some pictures are in this tag I just made... I’ll try to tag other pics later). I heard that they had been in a small band together or played music together or something like that when they were younger. Then Jacob became the bass player for Brown Eyed Deception sometime around the end of Brendon’s sophomore year of high school. Brown Eyed Deception played some local Vegas shows that year with bands like Name Taken and The Higher. For context, Brendon met and joined The Summer League in spring 2004... so Jacob was doing much cooler things in 2003-2004. Brown Eyed Deception kind of toured unsigned in 2004–2005 and they were seriously good. Kyle Lobeck was in Brown Eyed Deception too! The band turned into YouInSeries and released a record in 2006. Jacob hung out with a lot of guys who were in successful bands (many Vegas bands got signed after P!ATD's success) but he sort of slid between everything. Part of my info here is coming from fandom gossip in 2007-2008 and info that Vegas kids shared, so I’m def not saying that this post is on the same level as my Panic knowledge btw. Anyways, I heard Jacob was super kind, but it was like becoming a star wasn't really a goal of his?? Here’s part of Kyle’s myspace post when YouInSeries broke up around the start of 2008: “...After starting this band 5 years ago with my best friends in my garage, it seems as though YouInSeries has finally ran its course. We were in the process of writing songs for our second record when I was informed that some of us were not compelled to continue with this lifestyle anymore. It saddens me in such a way that its hard to express in words. I really wish we could have recorded our new songs for you guys to hear.” No idea where Jacob falls into that.

P!ATD never had the chance to create a local fanbase. They just put their demos on purevolume, got signed by Pete, and then had an international fanbase before they’d even recorded AFYCSO. I’ve mentioned over & over how they were hated on because they didn’t pay their dues... that was seriously like a main theme of 2005-2006 that got really old (even Jon Walker said he initially hated P!ATD before he met them). Jacob played in a local band that absolutely paid their dues over the years and had some decent respect from teens (just saying, I'm from several hundred miles away and I had actually heard of Brown Eyed Deception in high school... like I found them online and burned some of their demos onto a mix cd, so they were at least at that level). Maybe the local experience that Jacob had is better than the fame he didn't seek? lol who knows... but the lyrics could fit someone like him:

Again, I’m not saying this song is actually about Jacob! I’m only pointing out how lyrics are so open to interpretation. The first verse and the song in general doesn’t fit Ryan Ross at all, but I’m sure someone will still try to make that work too.

[winderlylandchime]

Hi! I hope you’re feeling better after your booster. I remember I felt like I was going to hell and back every hour of the day when I got mine but i agree, way better than covid. I always feel like I forget to reply to literally anything you say and I always feel bad because I swear it’s because of the fact that I’m busy babysitting a grown man. But to respond to some stuff:

Yes, he did accidentally steal a dog. Our mom took the dog to the groomers and he went to pick it up and they gave him who they thought was our dog. Turns out they accidentally made a mistake because there were two dogs that were identical (my mom looked for pics because i refused to believe it but nope, they looked like siblings and they gave them the same grooming style or whatever). He then all confused sent a pic of the dog to mom and was like ‘why is he acting so weird whats up with him?’ And even jokingly blamed her for the reason why the dog hates him bc how dare she groom him. And then they called from the groomers because they realized the mistake. At least it was the same dog and not a completely different one because that would be actually dumb on his part.

Also yes, our parents are going through it because of him. The parts that I don’t tell you guys about are when they text or call me to cuss me out because he’s annoying them. The rest of the family finds it hilarious but they unfortunately get the constant texts and voice memos and calls about a fictional character. Earlier this week (i think it was this week? Time is not real for me anymore, my bad) he woke them up at 3 am because he couldn’t sleep because he had thoughts about Britin. Our dad actually blocked his number for a full day after that which didn’t work because my brother ended up calling his assistant at work and pretended that it was an important family emergency (about him btw!!!! Which is fucked up on so many levels right now) and when dad answered all panicked, he went ‘did you seriously block my number because I asked you if you thought Brian is going to profess his love for Justin?’ So they are tired of him for sure. But i think we all know that this is not going away any time soon.

And yes, he is getting more and more curious about the cast. I think it’s because he knows he’s close to the ending so now he has a ton of questions that he didn’t care for at the start. I’m genuinely leaning towards showing him the out of the box interview and Randy’s podcast. Gale’s because it’s so interesting and since he’s obsessed with him, he’ll probably love learning more about him and with Randy he will be for sure shocked by what Randy is like. And omg I actually almost broke character and had an actual reaction when he lowkey went into RPF territory. I have no clue how we/he ended up here but oh boy. I also weirdly can’t wait for him to find out Gale is straight. Because i swear, this man genuinely has a crush on him and i can no longer tell if it’s in a bromance type of way or not.

And he is feeling a little better but unfortunately he had a tiny setback with his recovery this week which sucks. But he is much better and i can tell because for the past few days he didn’t want to watch new episodes and didn’t even speak much about Brian/Britin (except while rewatching old eps) because he was actually worried he wouldn’t be able to give his full attention and watch it properly. And today he was talking to our uncle about how much Brian has changed in the last season and how he has many thoughts about the last season. Which he still has to share with me. And when he does, best believe I will be here in a heartbeat.

Haha no worries! No one is here to hear about my boring little life. You and your brother are the content people are here for.

I am dying over that dog grooming story. I can see how that could happen. One time when I was very little, I fell asleep at my friend’s house. My parents were coming home late from a date night and had the key to my friend’s apartment to let themselves in and grab me. When they got back out into the hallway (this was in an apartment building) where it was light, they realized they had my friend and not me!

Your brother faked a family emergency so your dad’s assistant would put him through? OH NO! That is a bridge too far. Your parents must be so annoyed and angry.

I think we are ALL wondering if what your brother feels for Gale is bromance or perhaps a little something more.

I am excited to hear your brother’s thoughts on Brian’s growth. I totally get only rewatching until he’s in a place to give his full attention.

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

[anniesardors]

Ok, i swear all my neighbors hear me screaming at my tv.

I HATE THAT TO BE CONTINUED SCREEN WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING.

so many thing i need to say about this ep so here is the list

1. voight hiding the truth from anna was just stupid and cruel especially after what she had to go through. and when escano told her she started having a panic attack and breaking down like bro this is bad for you now cause she’s pissed at you.(i.e. the promo pic for next week)

2. the upstead banter at the beginning was good and happy and that is what i am thinking about for the next week.

3. *deep breath* JAY CALLING FOR HAILEY BROKE MY HEART UGH! AND HER NOT MOVING. I AM ALREADY IMPATIENT FOR NEXT WEEK.

4. now this is a question. do you think escano knows anna is an informant or does he think she is still with him? and to follow that, do you think there were ever drugs on that truck or was it all a set up for something?

ok i’m gonna go cry in the corner of my room now, bye 💙

I also audibly screamed with that ending. It was insanity. 1. I hate that he hid the truth from her. I understand why he did it for the case, but also it was obvious that at some point, it was going to come out what Escano did and it would have been better for her to know before hand. Her not knowing only made it worse for her and now she is spiraling even more. I feel so bad for poor Anna and just want things to work out for her

2. The upstead banter was next level. I have missed their flirty banter so much

3. His worried scream BROKE me. I have a feeling that first scene in 9x22 with him all worried about her is going to ruin me too

4. I feel like at this point, he has to know. Escano is smart and I feel like he is playing Anna and Voight. The whole team is in danger in different ways and that can't be a coincidence

Oh I need it to be Wednesday NOW

#annie answers 🖤 #chicago pd spoilers #upstead

[the-squeege]

Revamped an old oc from like 3 years ago and now I’m absolutely in love with him 🥺

Bonus pics plus some backstory below the cut because MAN I ADORE HIM!!!

Here’s me trying to condense his backstory into soemthing vaguely readable:

Gaius was originally a normal, albeit snobby and entitled, human from a big family. His father was a wealthy weapons manufacturer, and Gaius and all of his siblings were competing for the rights to his company and wealth. His father’s health was deteriorating, so competition amongst the siblings was fierce. While many of his siblings pursued degrees in business and marketing, Gaius had an interest in the sciences…but not really for the right reason. Being raised to be a cutthroat business man, Gaius wanted enough background in science to make him seem more legitimate than any of his siblings; he also had a bit of an ego and thought he could make some crazy, money-making machine and win his father’s approval. Before finishing his degree, he got desperate and broke into one of the labs. He found one of the company’s most valuable pieces of tech* and decided if he tampered with it, this could be his big break. Things went horribly wrong, resulting in Gaius losing an arm and developing some strange mutations**. Horrified and embarrassed, Gaius fled the scene and went into hiding. Initially, he tried to contact a trusted family member, but was ratted out. See, because he destroyed some of their most valuable equipment and fled, Gaius was seen as a traitor. He was initially figured to be dead until his arm was found, and his family member snitched on him. A massive manhunt was set into place, forcing Gaius further into hiding. Eventually, he settled into a low level labor job, harvesting equipment to be sent off to the company labs. During his work, he uncovered all sorts of horrible family secrets, and learned more about what happened to him. He eventually came out of hiding once he’d had enough, and effectively waged war on his family’s company. He campaigned to reclaim their stolen tech and use them for helpful things, mainly prosthetics like his arm***.

*It’s a “family secret” that this tech is horribly bastardized stolen artifacts from an abandoned, long forgotten planet.

**These mutations were caused by the alien artifact trying to assimilate Gaius into a recognizable form, one that could properly and safely wield such equipment.

***Gaius made his own prosthetic arm. He originally had a really shitty makeshift one but once he got comfortable with his job, he would smuggle bits and pieces out until he could make a new arm that was much more compatible with his altered biology. Also it’s important to mention that Gaius could accomplish this because he was pursuing a degree in engineering and robotics.

Also a meme I thought was super relevant:

#gaius #oc #my art #IM SO HAPPY WITH HIM!!! WAH!!! #i was gonna do the comparison of my old art but honestly it’s so bad I can’t even bring myself to post it here 💀 #but that just shows I’ve improved a lot! #ALSO HIS BACKSTORY!! ITS SO MUCH BETTER NOW #he went from one of my most ashamed creations to one of my most beloved blorbos #i love him so much #i need to draw him more…!!!!

[queermediastudies]

Hello everyone!!

My name is Grant (he/him) and I am currently in my second year at UCD and my second to last or last year of college! (yay!) I am taking this class so that I can better educate myself on all things queer and also because all I need to graduate is a bunch of >4000 level classes and this own seemed most interesting/relevant to me. As a queer person with many queer friends I like to think I know a good amount about the subject, however, there is a lot I am already learning and I am excited to continue to do so in this course. One thing I like to do in my free time is hang out with my dino friends (here is my beardie, Drayco). I also have a boa but unfortunately this is the only pic I have of either one since I broke my phone and lost my snapchat. :(

[martintmedina]

2022 A Year in Review

Another lap around the sun and a great year officially in the books.

Every year I try and summarize my thoughts on the last year and it seems like every year I get more shit done as I evolve and grow as a person. It’s crazy to see the progression from getting to college til now in my career, I’ve been steadily putting this work in for years and don’t plan on stopping anytime soon.

Before breaking down the year need to say a major THANK YOU! I appreciate all the support over the years and every single person in my life is a blessing. This year was a really big comeback year for me, the pandemic in 2020 and that post pandemic 2021 was really weird, I feel like the isolation got to everyone and then getting back to normal was a strange transition but this year we’re all the way back.

Started the year off solid and kept it going all year working hard and running up the bag. Really glad this year was a solid year of uninterupted work and I worked harder than ever to make more money than ever. Really needed it after I lost my job and learned so many lessons from going back to being broke but as an adult. We’re all the way back and stronger after that time though. It made me a beast and really proved I can step up and work my ass off. I worked nonstop through SOBEWFF, MMW, etc all going hard week after week with no vacations I really was locked in and focused on that bag. Focused on leveling up and getting better as I keep continuously improving and growing as a person and a professional. Personally and professionally this year was great and an amazing opportunity to grow.

Even while spending time working I was able to enjoy my time at work seeing homies working, enjoying some good music, and creating some images to capture incredible moments.

Work was great did some good work for SOBEWFF, then Music Week was fantastic and the first year of F1 MIA was also a huge success. Really pushed myself to be the most professional I can be and always deliver above and beyond for clients.

Rolling Loud once again was amazing to work with the whole team over at The Flowery again. We cooked up some great content and I’m excited to work on some new stuff for the new year. We did some cool little projects throughout the year and I’m really blessed to continue to learn and grow as a creative and a professional and grateful for everyone who helps me push myself as a professional to get better every day.

Shortly after I finally got my own spot. Those that have known me for a while know I’ve been working to get my own crib to be closer to work for a long time. It’s still a work in progress but I’m really liking how everything is coming out so far. Huge shoutout to my brother Andrew for hooking it up with the jersey and Allison for the art. Still got some more decorating to do but those pieces are at the centerpiece of the office. I’m very happy with how everything is looking, even though I’ve got a few upgrades to make but it’s getting more homey by the day. It’s definitely been an adjustment moving there but by now I’m really settled into the new space and it’s really coming together nicely. It’s a new crib in a new neighborhood but really getting used to living here and enjoying the space. Close to fam and close to work it’s really a blessing to have my own space. Been saying it’s essentially my live in office which is totally true it’s like basically my office with a kitchen and my bedroom which is just for sleeping. I’m excited for my office to grow up to take more space in the apartment too I’ve still got a bunch more equipment to get and want to get some storage for gear and some more stuff to make my work better and easier.

Back on the work front, Basel was a smash. Wasn’t super wild but was very smooth and still ran it up and tons of the pics went viral. Really locked in on the grind and dialed in on my workflow. Professionally feel like the year has been a big level up for me, my work and confidence in my work has gone up tremendously. I truly believe nobody can do what I do how I do it and I showed that during Basel. Then I enjoyed some much needed family time and closed the year out great with the fam and working up until the end on NYE.

Gotta give a huge shoutout to the whole team really on go all year my brothers stepped up. Appreciate all the clients we work with trusting us. Appreciate all my peers who constantly show me respect and spread love even while we all dealing with some bs.

Speaking of teams…

ARGENTINA CAMPEON DEL MUNDO! Finally! The World Cup was wonderful and I enjoyed watching the games, getting up early, catching games after work and watching some great games with the homies. The Cup was absolutely nuts but glad the home team came out on top.

IF YOU WANT TO READ MORE OF MY THOUGHTS ON THAT READ HERE

On the personal front, really crushed it in the gym shoutout to my brother Derek we went hard but next year we’re going even harder believe that! Still getting warmed up and dialed in so as I keep figuring it out I’m continuing to keep leveling up the gains are going to keep coming. Really happy with the measurable progress I’ve made too especially as a vegan have managed to gain muscle mass, increase strength, and lose a bit of fat. Continuing to dial in especially on my diet but every day I’m making progress and really seeing the changes in front of my eyes.

This year I was very mindful to stay fully focused and present in everything I do. I have tried to improve my focus and it’s still an ongoing battle but I’m getting better every day at really locking in on the task at hand and giving it my best with my undivided attention. It’s easy to get caught up in a million things especially with how connected all our devices are these days.

I want to continue to work on improving my focus and reducing distractions which in turn helps me waste time on my phone less and frees up time for productive activities. Need to get back to my roots and connect with new people and spend time in the streets all over the world.

Very happy overall life is good in the hood and the progress is trending in the right direction. I’m ready for more!

The one thing I didn’t do much of, cause I was locked in working, was I didn’t do as much travel as I wanted. Despite the lack of travel in 2022, I’ve been working on planning some cool trips for 2023 with a couple lined up in the first few months. Also hoping that new opportunities to travel for work also manifest themselves in the future. Would love to string some gigs together for an extended trip and take this tour on the road. I love challenging myself and pushing my comfort zone and I hope to do more of that in the future both personally and professionally.

As always here’s a playlist of songs I really enjoyed:

Locked in and focused! Let’s love more! Spread good energy!

See you in 2023

marty

check out the other editions of my yearly recap:

https://martintmedina.com/yearinreview

#2022 year in review

[speakfreelyyounggrasshopper]

Secrecy.

So now I know that it’s just me and strangers on this page. I guess I will just pour it allll out now because why tf not? I have no one else to turn to or anywhere to let it all out. Doing it here is all I got left because anywhere else, with whoever else, will just cause issues and I don’t want anymore problems.

There’s so much secrecy that I have no clue what to think, believe or feel anymore. I mean I’m asking questions left and right. I keep saying “it’s gotta just be my head” but at the same time, the facts/timing/proof/actions all show everything to me that it can’t be just in my head. I mean all these gut feelings have been coming and going but I did all I could to ignore them because I was trying to trust him more than my gut. I was raised to believe the gut feeling over anything and the times I didn’t the last few months made me look dumb.

He told me that she was blocked and showed that to me. Then come to find out, she isn’t blocked anymore. Why? Why unblock her? Why act one way and turn around to do the opposite? It doesn’t make sense to me because he knew how I felt about her and he still decide “hey, fuck her, let me just unblock this girl and secretly talk to her.” At least that how I felt it went because that’s pretty much what it looks like to me.

I didn’t know he was talking to her secretly because he easily deleted it. That tore my heart in half because he felt more comfortable hiding it from me and being secret. He felt comfort because he apparently didn’t want to hurt me or cause issues. I guess being secretive, lying, and hiding is more important than him telling me the truth. I only found out he’s been talking to her yesterday because I finally came clean about my gut feelings.

That’s when he told me that he has been talking to her and had her over his apartment the same exact day we broke up weeks ago. I was floored. I mean I could literally feel my heart shatter into so many pieces because one, I learned my gut was right with them secretly talking, and two, he had her over the same night we broke up weeks ago but didn’t tell me. He claims that all they did was hang out while her kid saw his animals and that’s all that happened. To me, at first, I didn’t believe it because of somethings just popping up like there had to be more to the story.

At least when I slept with a girl two weeks ago, while we was broken up, I fucking told him. I told him because I didn’t want to hide shit from him and I wanted honesty. Yea, it fucking hurt him some but at the same time, this girl was random and not a neighbor. A neighbor that my boyfriend had issues with and caused problems within my relationship with him. Honestly, he may feel hurt and weirded out about me with a girl but at least I am not keeping her around. Acting like I don’t want her. Secretly talking to her. Secretly bringing her to my house. Plus I slept with this girl well over 24 hours after we’ve broken up.

When we broken up, he had her over and sent her a dick pic to her but apparently unsent it. Obviously he wants her in some way because why would he send that to her the same day he had her over but constantly tells me he doesn’t want her. It doesn’t make any sense and that’s why I feel like he is comfort with the lie to prevent me from hurting. Lies hurt worse than the honesty but the level of comfort he gets from this is more important apparently. But fuck, I sleep with a random girl over 24 hours later, I am awful right?

I mean honestly makes me wonder what the fuck else he is hiding from me with her? Or even with other females? Seems like he is cozy with another girl too but I guess I will never know the truth on that either. Really, I don’t give a fuck if something happened while we was broken up. I truly give a fuck that it’s just lies and secrecy. Like why does there got to be lies and secrecy about that shit? Why? But fuck, if the roles was reversed, all hell would break loose, right? I am right. I know it would because he’s just as insecure as I am.

Constantly hearing him saying there’s someone else, thinking there’s someone else, talking to someone else, and etc when in reality there hasn’t been anyone. That girl was random and I didn’t talk to her before that night and I still haven’t spoken to her since that night but apparently there is someone else according to him. Just makes me feel more like he projecting but won’t admit shit to me. That’s why I am fucking hurt right now. I am crying. Constantly crying the past two damn days because obviously my gut was right on shit and it’s still telling me more things to believe when it’s kicking it.

Secrecy. So much damn secrecy and I fucking hate it. I want to keep those secrets from him but I can’t fucking bring myself to do it because I know what it feels like to be on that side of the field since every man does it to me. Honestly, this shit brings me back to allllll the emotions and thoughts that I had with my ex of 7 years. When he lied to me about a girl he was friends with but didn’t want her, turns out, that was allllll a lie. Literally just lies upon lies. I can feel my 18 year old self all over again, going through the same shit but with different people.

I remember those days like it was yesterday because of the pain it brought me. The way it destroyed me. She wasn’t his neighbor. She was a friend from a softball team and they got close but my gut told me there was more than friendship. One day I reached out to her, asking for the truth, and she told it all to me. Showed all the proof and I remember that night. I fell to my knees, crying and screaming as I felt my heart breaking. My childhood dog next to me and trying to comfort me. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t see straight. I remember all my emotions running through me like a freight train and I was just pouring tears like a storm. I was shaking uncontrollably and I didn’t know what to do.

Those emotions and endless thoughts surfaced up to when the truth with him came out yesterday morning. I felt all those emotions of my 18 year old self rise up and I was shaking uncontrollably yesterday. I haven’t felt that pain, emotions, saw these thoughts, or anything in many years and I was scared. I remember what all that shit did to me years ago and I don’t want it to go right back to it again now. Feeling my heart literally shatter again was so hard to handle. If it wasn’t for my best friend, catching me, and letting me crying in her arms yesterday for hours at a time, I’m not sure what would have happened to myself. She kept me sane at my weakest time.

While she held me when I was crying and screaming, I lost my memory. Apparently I kept saying “I did this. I did this to myself. I drove him to her. Just like before. I did this to myself.” Once I settled down, I kept saying how much I fucking love this guy and how he literally has me so damn addicted to him. I kept crying and saying that I am not worthy to be truly loved. I’m not worthy to have a honest relationship because I am so fucked up that I fuck everything up. I kept wanting to scream how I hate myself and I hate how the last few months have caused my world to come crumbling down. I kept wishing I was a better person and wish I could back in time to fix alllll the shit I did. Recorrect my mistakes and make different decisions.

Never did I think that he would bring this insecurity out of me again like my ex did to me when I was 18 years old. I felt like I was siting in comfort of lies because I deserved it, right? I deserve every bad thing to happen to me, right? I believe I do because I’m nothing but a piece of shit in this world. He doesn’t think there was nothing wrong with this whole situation and I think that hurt me even more because he knew that hiding it would be so much worse than telling me upfront about it. He knew it was wrong and he still did it. He knew how I felt about him and her but it didn’t stop him.

Now I have to apparently accept him and her as “friends” because he wants her in his life obviously…

#notes