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#these were a little short but im working my way through the drafts!!
harrysarchive · 2 months
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if only you knew, bunny: h.s.
pairing:
dormmate!harry x dormmate!y/n
summary:
"sorry! sorry i thought you were staying out with your mom the rest of the weekend!" harry says, rustling is heard in the background before im gentle moved to over and the door is heard opening. "you can open your eyes bunny."
warnings:
TW⚠️ body shaming
unhealthy relationship with y/n's mom (body shaming, controlling mom, just a shitty mom overall) also really short sorry i just wanted to tease these two
A/N: guys the way this has been in my drafts for about 4 months LMFAO lmk if you would want more dormmate!harry x y/n!
part two
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y/n's pov
The smell of peppermint vanilla carries along with the scent of books, soft chatter from the tv carries out in the small dorm, i glance over at the empty bed and a frown tugs at my lips.
"guess im on my own." i huff closing my book and tossing it to the side.
as i pick up my phone a knock makes me still, i glance at the door before walking over to it and slowly opening the door. my eyes catch sight of a lovely shade of green staring back at me.
"um sorry," he clears his throat, "my names Harry, and i think we're flatmates."
my eyes widen at what he says before my eyebrows furrow, "um im y/n, i didnt think i had a dorm mate."
"yeah 'm sorry about that i was in england for the past month, so i couldnt do all the orientation." he shuffles his bags and i snap out of it before throwing the door open.
"apologies, um i didnt think they did unisex dorms here."
"i wasnt expecting this either this is um C36 right?"
"yeah yeah you're right, well welcome to your dorm Harry..." i trail off not knowing his last name hoping he'd fill in the blank.
"styles!" he smirks holding out his hand and I place my hand in his giving it a shake.
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"oh my god! harry!" i squeak covering my eyes as i step into our shared dorm, a topless girl perked up on his bed.
"sorry! sorry i thought you were staying out with your mom the rest of the weekend!" harry says, rustling is heard in the background before im gentle moved to over and the door is heard opening. "you can open your eyes bunny."
i peak through my fingers and find our room empty, just the two of us. "i would've left har, you could've asked you know i dont mind." i mumble dropping my bags on my bed.
"nonsense i would rather spend time with you bun, though uh -if you dont mind me asking- why are you back so early?" he asked sitting us on my bed, i sit crisscross in front of him before tears start welding up in my eyes.
"god that woman is so fucking cruel to me har." i gasp out a sob as tears fall freely down my face.
"whoa bunny breathe for me." harry hums pulling me into his arms, broken sobs hiccup through me as i weep like a baby into harry.
"i do everything she wants, im trying to appease her and nothing is ever good enough it's either 'you look too chubby', 'you're face looks dull, use more moisturiser.' 'are you working out?' i'm sick of it!" i hiccup, "as soon as i got there she just starts listening all the things i embarrass her with. 'no daughter of mine should be in college, i got a nice boy down the street who comes with money and would love to be with you if you lost a couple of pounds.' i dont want that har, i've studied my whole life to be here. i want to be a librarian, have my own little bookstore that is where my happiness is and im not going to let her drag me down." i finish my rants tears and snot running down my face and into my hands.
harry stays quite for a little bit, rocking us slowly back and forth, i feel his lips press against my head before he lifts my head to look at him. he wipes away my tears before smiling lightly.
"you're a fighter, bunny. im proud of you, for not letting this woman take control of your life. for being your own goddamn person." he whispered to me before yanking me into a hug and tickling my sides, a laugh erupts from me before i start thrashing in his arms
"harry! stop!" i laugh before he lays on top of my the air literally being knocked out of me, "oof! you fat ass get off of me!"
"gasp! how dare you!" he gives me a cheeky smile before rolling off of me. "want to go get fro yo? on me obviously."
"ugh!" i fake displeasure rolling my eyes, "only because you want some and are paying sure."
harrys pov
i watch as y/n throws a hoodie over her head, i pull my bottom lip between my teeth looking at her legs on display, nice thick thighs and a ass that would make god sin. her face fresh with tears making her glow as bright as a star, a beautiful natural blush on her brown skin, lips plump.
a down right goddess.
"can we stop by a 7/11, momma needs some chips." she smirks pulling me out of thought as i burst into laughter.
"you're a clown!" i snort sliding on some shoes and grabbing my lanyard, i open the door for her and let her slide through, taking time watching her walk from behind before joining her.
" 'm so lonely i might take up that woman's offer with the boy down the street." she breaks the silence shoving her keys in her purse, my heart plummets.
fuck no.
"bunny you can do so much better than a man that will only want you if you lost weight." i sternly say and she snorts.
"well im waiting and theres no one in a 20 mile radius that would want me."
if only you knew bunny.
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LOVE YALL REQUEST MORE BULLSHIT!!
-all the love,
em
xo🐝
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cherrysha · 2 months
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To Be Alone
Pairing: Sukuna x Reader
A/N: Getting this tf outta my drafts,,, banishment style. if its formatted wrong its because im tipsy and im too lazy to fix it,,, itll get fixed in the morning <3
Word Count: 4K
Warnings: Paranoia, weed, dubcon (since reader is under the influence), slight body horror
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It’s already dark outside when you get to Yuuji’s apartment. Streetlights glimmer with a low electric buzz as you make your way up the concrete stairs. Its unseasonably cold outside, autumn air chilling through the light jacket you found haphazardly stuffed in the back of your car. He’s still blowing your phone up, probably ‘where are you??’ messages like he hasn’t been texting you that for the past fifteen minutes. Like he doesn’t know how far your work is from his apartment. You'd been friends long enough now to know when to answer his texts and when to ignore the incessant buzzing of your phone. “Jesus” you mutter as his ringtone plays. It’s been years but he’s always like this. A little too eager, like a child. Hitting mute, you finally round the corner and knock on his door. Yuuji could be so impatient sometimes.  It only takes one rap against the metal before you can hear the bolts turning, your friend’s cottony pink hair greeting you, eyes scrunched in a bright smile. You can't be mad, not when the smile that covers his face is so genuine.
“You're insane” you huff out at him, stepping into the threshold and shimmying out of your coat in the process. His apartment is always so warm, a little too warm, but his older brother blew a gasket any time Yuuji tried to turn down the heat for you.
 “Am not!” you giggle as he puts a hand to his chest, mock annoyance coloring his face “You just need to be quicker… making me wait and all.” You ignore him, haphazardly kicking out of your shoes before stepping deeper into the apartment.
“isn’t Junpei coming? We have to wait for him anyway.”
“He, uh, didn’t feel like coming out tonight” you can hear the disappointment in his voice at the statement and it’s contagious. Yuuji’s had a crush on the boy for almost an entire year, which is hard to believe given his short attention span and lack of romantic interest. With an audible ‘tsk’ you ruffle his hair, smiling at the little indignant look on his face that threatens to spill over at the touch. 
“There’s always next time, Yuuji” he nods, smile returning as he follows you into the living room. 
“Was thinkin’ we could watch Cast Away, since you don’t like the scary stuff”. If Junpei were here, you know he’d make you watch a horror movie anyway. Probably send you off to his room during the really scary parts so you wouldn’t ruin the mood. The thought makes you smile, and you eagerly nod as you sink back into the sofa. Yuuji sits down next to you with a huff, fiddling with the remote until the movie starts in the background. He’s probably watched this one a dozen times. You know you’ve seen it with him too many times to count. Without much thought he turns it up before setting the remote back down and picking the blunt up off the coffee table. Thank God he figured out how to roll them up. The last thing you wanted was another thirty-minute session of trying to show him exactly how to do it himself. 
Tom Hanks’ boring little life plays out on the screen in front of you as Yuuji mumbles something about how you would’ve rolled it better, and not to judge his sloppy technique. He’s still learning and all. You don’t look his way to reply, only muttering “Free weed is free weed.” as you focus on the movie. He's never told you who his dealer is, and you’ve never outright asked. Whoever he was, he never seemed to be in short supply. All the dealers you’ve met at college were either professional frat boy scam artists, selling little baggies of trash weed to stupid rich boys, or untrustworthy as hell. The type to sell you laced product and not even bat an eye. Good dealers were hard to find. It wasn't surprising Yuuji hadn’t told you, and it didn’t matter since he rarely liked to smoke alone. Yuuji leans back into the couch as he lazily hands the blunt to you, coughing a little at the end of his exhale. You don’t think about it as you take it from his hand. 
Friday nights at Yuuji’s feels like routine at this point. Leave work, smoke a blunt or two on his couch as he monologues about the random movie he’s put on, sober up and go home to your empty apartment and sleep in until Yuuji blows your phone up again. Sometimes Junpei or Nobara join in too, but most of the time it’s just you and him. Like it’s always been. 
Time feels like syrup as you listen to him ramble, voice a breathy sigh as he tells you behind the scenes facts about the movie. How Wilson actually had his own lines in the script, how none of the sound was useable and had to be added in during post production. A treasure trove of useless facts that you happily indulge in listening to. It’s odd to think of him taking his time to learn such trivial things. The image of him blankly staring at the cast away wiki during lecture swirls in your mind, pulling a chuckle from your dry throat. He’d definitely do something like that. Probably wouldn’t care if he was caught either. 
“What’s so funny?” he mumbles, lazy smile almost infectious as you just nod your head at him, eyes averting back to the screen. 
Toms already stranded on the island, you think this is the part where he rips out an infected tooth, at least you hope it is. You didn’t want to be around to see that on the screen again.
“You want somethin’ to eat?” you mumble at him, pushing up from the couch.
  “Uh, can you get me a bottle of water?” you nod, with a small chuckle. His eyes are glazed over, half lidded as he watches the screen like he’s absorbing any information that’s being presented to him. In about five minutes he’d probably be asleep. 
You hear the scream from the kitchen as Tom finally pulls the tooth out with the blade of an ice skate. You were too squeamish to look at the screen the first time you watched it. Even now, the sound alone was enough to gross you out. 
Yuuji’s cupboards are always well stocked with garbage. Chips, candy, instant noodles, anything you wanted. You take another drag from the blunt, head fuzzing over with smoke as you stare at all the options. Sukuna kept most of his food separate, not that you had to worry much about accidentally eating it. The healthy stuff was all his. Mostly stuff that had to be prepared and cooked. You weren’t looking for that shit tonight. 
“You should probably eat something!” you call out to him. After a few seconds with no reply, you peek around the corner, unsurprised to see him snoring away loudly on the couch. Go figure.
He usually fell asleep later, during the first half of the second movie. When the blunt was at least half finished.  At least he left room for you on the couch this time.
Not thinking much about it, you grab a pack of cookies and two water bottles. One for you, and one for the bonehead if he decided to wake up any time soon. 
Yuuji had left another blunt unattended, letting it idly burn away in the ashtray while he snored unashamedly on the armrest. It wasn’t really a problem, if anything it meant more for you. Yuuji wouldn’t mind, if anything he’d probably be happy that it didn’t go to waste… He probably wouldn’t mind if you smoked the third one either…
~~~
Idly you sip the water, heart pumping faster than it should be, skin feeling clammier than normal. You didn’t feel normal. Nothing felt normal.
He’s been passed out for too long to be easily woken up by the time you start feeling it. ‘It’ being the ever-pressing creep of paranoia along the edges of your psyche. Tom Hanks is screaming as Wilson bobs away from the makeshift raft and you can't help but to think the neighbors hear. That they’re calling the cops for a wellness check as you sit there, unmoving. The ambient lights flickering in through the curtains no longer feels warm, but rather very, very insidious. What happens if you go to jail? Will you lose your scholarship? Do you even have a fucking scholarship? You shake your head to try and clear the thoughts away to no avail. Yuuji’s groaning in his sleep, drool pooling out of the side of his mouth and the sudden impending doom bubbles back to the forefront of your mind. What if he chokes on all that drool and dies and you go to jail because you weren’t keeping an eye on him? Is it possible to choke on your own spit? 
Your fears seem to be confirmed as the apartment door swings open, deafening compared to the low mumble of the tv and Yuuji’s deep snores. You can hear whoever it is close the door before walking down the hallway. What if it was the cops? Or even worse, someone here to rob Yuuji? Fuck, if that were the case, you'd have no qualms with them taking everything they wanted. It’s Yuuji’s fault he didn’t deadbolt the door.
You let go of the breath you'd been holding when Sukuna rounds the corner. Eyes flickering to his brother, then to you, then to the blunt burning away in the ashtray. 
You must look startled, wide eyes locked on him as adrenaline surges through your body. You must look a little suspicious too. 
“You good?” he asks, and you can't help but look away from his heavily tattooed face, eyes instead focusing on how his chest slowly moves under his plain white shirt with each breath. You blink, trying to mimic the natural motion, the steady in-and-out of his lungs filling up and exhaling air. 
“Yeah… yeah. I just thought you were someone else.”
“Who?” his voice is demanding, sharp. Its always been that way. Deep and rich and hard to ignore. The only time you’ve been able to hear him speak more than a few words is when he’s bitching Yuuji out over something.
Taking, what you think is a very short moment, you answer.
“The cops?” he’s sighing at the sheepishness in your voice. Obviously connecting the dots as he moves to snuff the lit blunt out in the ashtray.
You can't help it as you continue to talk, to give him more proof of your paranoia as you try to defend your own emotions to him. After too long, he stops you. Hand coming to rub his face in a movement that exposes his true irritation.
“I just wanted some peace and quiet” Sukuna groans. He takes a moment to stare at the ceiling. 
Silence hangs in the air like smoke as you try and find the words you need. Tell him that this is a mistake, a misunderstanding.
“I can go, if, if that’s what you wa-“ 
“Just shut the fuck up y/n.” he snaps, eyes finding yours just as tears threaten to spill. You don’t know why you were being so sensitive. Maybe it was because you’d never even met eye contact with the man, maybe it was because of your mental state, who was to tell. He groans again, moving closer and placing a hand on your head. Big arms encircle your waist as he hoists you up, free hand wiping at the tears sliding down your face as he walks down the hallway. 
He’s so warm, how have you not noticed before? It’s not like you had ever been this close to him to truly know. In fact, this is the closest you’d ever been to him, physically and emotionally. You’d never felt comfortable enough, even the other times he’d come home to find you and yuuji stoned out of your minds, he usually left you two to your own devices and acted as if you weren’t there.
Before you know it, he’s plopping you down on his bed, and even just being in the quiet dimly lit room with him is more comforting than it should be. After all, he was being kind, a side of him you rarely saw.
“Still in your work clothes” he mumbles to himself, that layer of irritable disappointment still threading through his words as he curses again. Whispering something about kicking Yuuji’s ass before his big frame disappears out of the room. It hits you then just how focused he is on your well being. He’d focused in on something you thought was a non-issue, fixated on your comfort even if you weren’t.
You can hear him, doors creaking open and rummaging noises distantly echoing from down the hall, but all you can focus on is how the ambient light in his room looks sinister now that you’re by yourself. It doesn’t take long before he’s back, tossing you a pair of Yuuji’s sweats and sitting a glass of water down on the bedside table. 
“Come out and let me know when you're changed.” he mumbles, but you already have a hand around his wrist. The touch softly begging him to stay and let you find comfort. Even if Sukuna is as comforting as a rock, it felt wrong being alone. You know it’s wrong, this is yuuji’s older brother, his older brother who’s rarely home, who’s done nothing but ensure your comfort, and yet, you can’t stop the well of feelings bubbling up in your chest at his casual decency. He stays, begrudgingly sighing as he sits down on the edge of his bed. You don’t expect him to give you any privacy, and he doesn’t, but you're too focused on keeping your cool to truly pay attention to the way his eyes roam over your exposed skin, eyebrow raising at the sight of you undoing your bra and tossing it into your pile of clothing. 
When you’re finished he asks if you're tired, quieter now, observing you as if he’s come to some new realization while watching you undress. You nod your head, hesitantly sitting on the edge of the bed. Hoping that maybe if you were lucky he wouldn’t make you sleep in yuuji’s room. The thought of being left alone with your own thoughts much scarier than the man in front of you. Even if he kicked you out, you’d probably find yourself on the couch next to yuuji, being kept awake by his incessant snoring. Even now you could faintly hear it, the sound reverberating through the hallway and into Sukuna's room.
Before you can think too much about it, however, hands find your hips, maneuvering you onto Sukuna’s chest as he lays down with you. Every inhale moves your body on his, deep breaths as he slides his palms up to the back of your head, lifting it so you have no choice but to stare into his eyes. 
“Feel any better?”. Vaguely, you think this is the nicest sukuna has ever been to you, even if he is forcefully tilting your head back. Usually, you only see him in passing, any words spoken on his part come out as a grunt and nothing more. Yuuji had told you that you were Sukuna’s favorite, whatever that meant. And when you had pressed Yuuji on that sentiment he had clammed up. Said Sukuna only let you stay the night, had only ever been himself around you. Of course you hadn’t known what he meant by that; Sukuna barely acknowledged you, never speaking to you unless he could do so in monosyllabic words or grunts. But tonight, he'd been nothing but kind, at least kind in his own right. 
You nod, breath hitching as he mutters out a “good girl” before kissing the crown of your head. There’s nothing further than that, and after a while his deep breaths even out. You feel like a cat, some sort of small animal that their owner has allowed to sleep on their chest. It’s all too docile. Slowly you find yourself drifting off as well.
Your rest ends up being shorter than you would’ve hoped because Its hot. Too fucking hot. Too hot to sleep, too hot to breathe. You need out. Slowly, you slip off the huge t shirt, uncaring of your bareness underneath. You need relief in some form. It takes a few tries before you can roll the sweatpants off of your hips. Maybe if you were sober you would’ve remembered that this was not the time nor the place to be laying yourself bare, but for right now, its hard to remember your propriety. In truth, you forgot about the fact that your were a guest in a grown man’s bed, In truth, you really didn’t stop to think about repercussions. By the time you’re done, you realize you have an audience. Sukuna’s eyes are staring down at you, fingers digging into the meat of your hips to still your movement.
“Sukuna I’m sorry-“ 
“You trying to start something?” 
“No, no I just got hot and- “
“You could’ve gotten the fuck off of me” it only takes a moment before tears threaten to spill at the harsh words, at the mean look on his face as he stares down at you. Its embarrassing, mortifying, that he’s right. Before you can make much progress on getting your body off of his a tight grip on your hips stills you as he readjusts, and places you squarely back on top of him again. 
“Such a crybaby” his hips rock up, hands pressing you down further as he moves languidly against you. “Feel that crybaby?” you nod, eyes still focused on his as he continues moving. He’s hard between your legs, every press of his hips squishing into that soft spot at the apex of your thighs, igniting a new type of heat inside of you.
“There’s no use trying to take advantage of me like that,” he grunts, still moving against you “coulda just asked. I’m more than happy to give you what you want.”
Its not like that, at least in your head it wasn’t. You had made too many bad choices tonight, and all of them had led you here. Straddling his wide hips, hands on his chest as you slowly grind back and forth on top of him, gasping at the delicious friction with every swivel. Its surprising he allows it, but Sukuna just calmly rests on his elbows, transfixed with the way the material of his sweatpants moves underneath you, how he can feel the heat radiating from your core like a furnace. 
Before long he sits up, hand wrapping around your hip to force you to still. He laughs at the whine that bubbles up from your throat, eyes searching your face as his free hand tangles in between you, pressing in between your bodies until he finds what he’s looking for. His thumb presses down softly at first, gentle and languid strokes over your clothed clit until your eyes flutter shut and you mouth drops open at the sensation. The syrupy feeling doesn’t last long, only a few minutes of his hips bucking up into yours, jostling you each time as his thumb traces careful circles, until he’s had enough and presses down on your clit harshly. His body shakes with laughter as you cry out in overstimulation.
 “such a glutton” his mouth finds your throat, lips closing over your pulse point as his eyes flutter shut  at the feel of your whines vibrating through the skin there. On a harsher thrust your nails accidentally scratch down the expanse of his muscular chest, ripping a growl from him in the process. Before you can apologize, he’s cursing again, hips moving against your own as he pulls and pushes you against him. Your best friend’s brother, beneath you, panting and groaning at the feeling of your nails in his chest. It doesn’t seem real, if anything it’s more believable that you passed out beside yuuji and ended up in a fucked up dream. Unfortunately for you the dull, bruising, ache of his hands on your hips solidifies this as reality, and unceremoniously you're dumped onto the bed, underneath him as he pants above you. 
His eyes look crazed, an inch away from terrifying, as he sloppily rips your underwear from you, ignoring the sound of the fabric protesting at such harsh treatment. It feels wrong, and that alone turns you on further. Sukuna’s chest rises and falls in his excitement, and two fingers push into you, gathering slick and messily smearing it over your pussy. His hand is still wet, glistening in the low light as it wraps around your knee, pushing both of them together and up. 
“Sukuna – “ 
 “who told you to speak?” he’s lining himself up, eyes focused as he slowly rolls his hips forward. You never even noticed his sweats came off, never wanted it to get this far, but before you can find your voice -
You expect to feel the harsh burn of him pressing inside of you, but it doesn’t come. instead, his cock is pushing through your thighs, glistening head squishing through sticky flesh as he starts to set a harsh pace. The underside brushes along your folds, gathering the slickness there with every pass as his pace only gets faster. 
“Fuck” he groans, hips twitching as he stills, trying to catch his breath at the sensation, at the fucked out expression on your face. He hasn’t even fucked you and yet you look an absolute wreck. You don’t feel much better either. Every slide of his hips forces more wetness from you, more noises from you. The feeling of his fingers digging into to crook of your knees keeps you firmly planted in the moment.
“All of this,” he sighs, finally picking up the pace after being a tease the entire night, “right under my nose this whole time.” the air is pushed out of your lungs as his cock finally rubs against your clit. 
The sound of his body slamming against your own fills the room. Sukuna leans down, and for a shocking moment you think he may actually kiss you, but his head goes even lower before you can feel his teeth biting against your neck. There’s no room to breathe with him like this, your hands curling into the red sheets, his mouth unabashedly leaving marks against your throat, its all too overwhelming. The sound of slapping echoes through the room. You’re left adrift in the sensation of Sukuna fucking your thighs so vigorously, the wet schlick of skin on skin, the sound of his panting breaths. Only a few more thrusts against your clit before you’re whining, thrashing against the bed, close to an orgasm that doesn’t come. 
“Did you really think I’d let you?” He breathlessly laughs “i’m not that kind sweetheart.”
Sukuna pulls back at the last second, hand on his cock as he jerks off in front of you, kneeing at your spread legs until you’re situated just the way he wants: legs spread, breathless, as he pumps his cock in front of your tits. 
“Such a pretty thing” he murmurs, “shame this is all goin’ to waste… maybe one day-“ the groan, and sudden release that bathes your chest, is startling. You’d never thought of yuuji’s brother in this way, moaning above you as he paints your chest white. But now the truth of it was jarring enough for you to see the truth for what it was. You had fucked your best friend’s brother. Had let him finish on your chest, even let him clean you up afterwards and croon sweet nothings into your ear during the process. You were even shameless enough to fall into a peaceful sleep next to him.
When you wake, the room still faintly smells of sex. Fear grips you as you hear something down the hall. Sukuna is long gone, something you’d expected before you even opened your eyes. You know he’s probably left the apartment already, that’s not what scares you. The sound reverberating down the hall is yuuji. Singing over some shitty pop anthem blaring through a speaker. How could you explain away fucking his brother?
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drdemonprince · 6 months
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watching a 1992 Donna Tartt interview where she describes writing her first draft of The Secret History as setting out on a cross-country trip with only a map, not knowing what kind of unexpected detours she might run into along the way and then figuring out her way through them. She also likens getting to know her characters over the course of the writing to getting to know a good friend -- at first you think you've got them figured out, but with more time and in new situations, you learn all kinds of new shades to them.
and it strikes me. that neither cross country trips nor getting to know friends quite works out that way anymore. Today we have Google directions that can update relatively in real time to reflect not only changes in the roads and byways, but short-term construction and traffic jams as well. and while there's certainly an element of surprise to befriending somebody still, things aren't quite so much of a mystery anymore as they were before social media. today it's quite easy to make an informed guess based on a person's posting habits which movies theyd want to see with you, whether they'd like to visit an art gallery or a park or a club. and you know what's going on in their life so much of the time, or at least what they broadcast about it, so you get to develop a sense of their patter and their insecurities and what makes them spiral.
and i wonder if human beings on the whole are less comfortable with uncertainty now, and see themselves as less capable of weathering unexpected challenges -- be that a pothole or a conversation with no script -- because we haven't gotten to exercise that self-trust of embarking on the road with only a map that Donna describes.
i know that when i encounter an unexpected problem and i can solve it, it helps me feel powerful. it helps me feel that my world has expanded in some triumphant little way. now i know how to install a curtain rod. i will never not know how to do it again. now i know how to fix a biplane closet track thats bent. now i know how to donate blood and what to do before. i know how to tell a boorish dude at a bar to leave my friend and i alone because now i've done it. and the more things that i become able to do, the greater faith i have in my own ability to do things generally -- to learn, to fix, to adapt. im no luddite but i am someone who always wants to google unknowable information, such as whether a bartender will yell at me for ordering the wrong kind of drink at the wrong sort of bar. but i have that all backwards now dont i. the only way i get over that anxiety is not by getting all the information, but by getting experience moving into places where i dont have the information. driving on the roads when the maps are out of date.
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cuddl3s4shur1 · 1 year
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Premiere
Letitia Wright x Interviewer Black Fem
Summary:You were going Interview Letitia about a new movie she started in. While you interviewd her you felt tension and her gaze following your body .
Authors Note:Most likely I was a lazy person like i normally am and did not re read this.this been in my drafts for like a month
Taglist: @tuesdaylovesu(wifey fr) @2k7-sparkles @atssukoo @womenlxver @niaalove @letitias-fav @adeola-the-explorer @yvxmpire @shuriislut @shuri-my-love @xxmilli @yvxmpire @writesbyriri @locoforshuri @lunax0654 @womenlxver @malltake12 @secretgyals @randomhoex @saintwrld @ziayamikaelson
:)
Backstory
You where a well known interviewer. 2 weeks ago you heard that Letitia started in a movie and it had a premiere . You asked and got permission from your boss to go. Tonight was that night to meet Letitia.
Present
You where ready for your limo to get here you couldn’t wait out side in the cold anymore . You had a long slit down your thigh and no sleeves and.Youu had a black short furry coat on top but it wasn’t doing anything.
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(Outfit idea ,imagine whatever)
“Can they hurry up damn it’s cold out here “ you say getting anxious. You start to call to call your boss.
“Are they coming “ you say heavy in to the phone
“They should pull up anytime soon” you boss says being unfazed
“You need to tell them to hurry this coat isn’t helping” you say annoyed.
“Alright ill get them to handle it” you boss says as she hangs up the phone .
You started to rub your legs together while you were standing .It was a little warmth for your body but you still where still shivering. “Can they hurry sometimes being a bad bitch can have its down sides” you say mumbling to your self .
The limo hunks it’s horn “Took it long enough got me shivering my ass off” you mumble as you get in the limo
You check your phone to see the time."I'm finna be late than a bitch" you mumble. "Driver we need to be there in 15 minutes you think we gon make it” you ask the limo driver “Yeah sit back in finna wip this hoe” you laugh and sit back . The limo driver started flying through traffic I mean he understood the assignment.
You made it the movie premiere at the exact time .You get out the limo and you walk to driver side .”Here’s a tip for getting me here in time “ you had him 100 dollars from your purse . “Thank you I’ll see you after the premiere “ he says accepting the money. You leave the limo and make your way to the red carpet.
You pose for some pictures and you get ready to interview with cast .You make your way around the cast .”Is it ok if I interview you guys together and one by one “ You ask as your standing looking at the group of cast standing . “Yeah that’s fine “ a voice says softly. “Who would like to go first“ you ask questioning them. “I'll go “ tish says. She was wearing a black suit that fitted her body perfectly. She had her grills on and took her glasses off.
“I'm guessing it was like some memo of like the color black and something but you know Im kinda on memo “ you say laughing at the
“How was it like filming February 14th,” you ask wondering. “It was an experience and I believe that many people will enjoy the love story between the two characters,” she says expressing a smile. “Will work with this cast again?” you ask her. “Oh definitely they're funny and you know their kind, “ Tish says doing a slight laugh. “Thats good to hear “ you respond you start thinking of more questions.”What was your favorite song on the soundtrack recently you have been posting about it a lot “ you say you where pretty nervous talking to her but you kept your cool. “It would have to be Ex Kiana Ledé Even though it was made before the movie it just makes sense for the movie “ she responded that was also your favorite song. “Well I guess that's a wrap because the other questions I feel like are kinda iffy “ you explain to tish hoping she would understand. “You can ask the questions it's not bad “ she explains. “Whatever you say, do you believe the kiss was a real feeling or not” you ask mumbling at the last part. “Huh” she asks confused about what you just asked. “During the kiss scene do you believe it was a real feeling, “ you ask this time asking it right. “ no not really it just felt pretty friendly “ she explains. “Alright thanks for having you Tish “ . You say going to get the next cast member.
As you begin to interview the next cast member coco jones you feel tish looking over your shoulder . “As you guys can see we have Tish behind me and it's scary” you say chuckling. “Dont be scared baby girl “
Your heart started pounding you start being able to think about 1 thing and 1 thing only. Did she just call me baby girl? Yes she did and now you're having a nervous breakdown but you still have to finish the interview. “Bro your such a flirt leave y/n alone got her panicking, “ Coco Jones says as she laughs. “Um the next question was how was it like working with Ms. Tish back here “ you ask staying focused a little .” It was good you know we had funny moments” she explains. “Mmm ,This is off topic but coco you absolutely slayed the outfit . She had a black shimmery dress . In the middle it was a circle connecting the top and bottom. She had her back out and wore clothes that matched .
“I could say the same for you look beautiful like you have been taking people’s breath away looking that good “ she says complimenting you . “I agree on that statement my breath had been taking away when you simply smile” tish explains to you. “Your pretty flirty today “ you say looking back at her with a chuckle. “For you baby “ she says with a smirk “ Oh well thank you ?” You say confused on how you should respond .”Im going to leave you two love birds alone,my ship is starting to sail” she says chuckling
If someone from the future would have told you that Letitia Wright would be flirting with you, you would not believe them at all. You begin to hum trying to avoid talking to tish because you could fuck up. “Pretty flirtatious Ms.Ma,am” you say chuckling. “You know you looking good so I had to shoot my shot “ she says doing a smirk showing a little bit of her grills . “I mean you did pretty well” you say smiling . “You could say I’m a natural” she says grabbing your hand. “Oh are you “ you ask acting surprised. “Well can I take you out sometime “ she says as she starts massaging your hand . “I mean if you could keep up with me being a interview than we’ll see “ you say .
Each time you would get in a relationship with a regular person or celebrity it would always have a down fall because of your job. You hated how your job would do this to relationships but you still wanted to do your job.
“A little job isn’t going to stop me “ she says . “I can see that “ you say with a smile. “Well I’ll see you around I’ll probably see you before I’ll leave “ you say as you slowly leave . She lets your hand go and you continue your night .
For the rest of the night you talked with celebrities you knew made new friends and really interviewed the cast. All until it was time to go back home .
“Well tish I wanted to say hi before I go “ You say walking up to her . “Woah woah i can take you home “ she says as she gets panicked . “No it’s good I got a ride” you say letting her know. “Well can I come with “ she asks . “I mean sure I don’t think it’s wrong “ you say as you walk her to the limo .
You and tish rode the limo back to your place and you welcomed her. “Well this is my home and make yourself at home,” you say smiling. “ Nice place you got here, “ she says as she walks around. “Thank you “ Letitia Sits on the couch .” where are you going to sleep-” you ask before you got cut off “With you” you look at her with a side-eye. “Umm sure I guess “ you gave her some pjs “ Yeah I'm not going to fit this your tiny,” she says as she laughs. “Bro you're just tall” you say laughing. “Well what are you going to sleep in” you ask her confused. “I mean I have some oversized fluffy pj pants “
You give her your oversized pls and you look in your drawer to get the same pjs. “Come on let's take a picture “
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You didn't post the picture but you took the pic but you thought it was a fun memory.
You and tish cuddled for The night in your matching pjs. While this went to sleep on your shoulder. But than you decided to post the picture.
Png. Y/n
Posted
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New Memory ❤️
After you posted the picture you went to sleep. You didn't know how the post would go but you thought it was a fun one.
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sentimentalslut · 2 months
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Hello! Just a quick question: how did you realise you want to be an attorney (not a law enthusiast or someone interested in pursuing it as a profession, simply a senior in highschool who is a little lost in life)?
hi! first of all — it’s normal to not know what you want to do at your age. your life is gonna take a ton of twists and turns and you’ll look back on this time in the future and be so glad you didn’t have everything figured out.
the short answer is that I realized I actually wanted to be an attorney uh. my third year of law school.
the long answer is this:
i went into college wanting to be a doctor. i was a biology major for the first two years of undergrad. i transferred schools after freshman year. i changed from pre-med to pre-nursing. i failed chemistry three times. my third year of undergrad i changed to a Spanish degree because it was the only thing i had enough credits in to still graduate in four years. i knew i’d probably wind up a teacher, which i wasn’t crazy about, but it was a job, and id be helping people — which was why i wanted to be a doctor in the first place. i took the lsat Junior year at my mothers insistence. “just in case”.
my junior year of college I worked as an assistant manager at a Jamba Juice. it blew — i’d get in at 5 to open the store at 6, then work until my class at noon. on my early morning commute id listen to the news. at the time, the stories about ICE’s family separation policy were just coming out. i was horrified. I wanted to do something.
i took a job as an assistant at an immigration law firm that summer. it was a lot of translation and research at minimum wage. but i got to watch my boss work. and her work was incredible. her clients were incredible. i wanted to be like her. to help people.
i worked my ass off to pull up my grades. i got into law school. i went right after undergrad.
one semester in, i called my father sobbing. i knew it wasn’t right for me. for the first time in my life i felt stupid. there was no way i’d make it through three years of this shit. and even if I somehow managed to graduate, i was going to be a terrible lawyer.
my dad is a doctor. he loves his job. he loves his patients. from what im told, he’s great at what he does.
when I finally managed a coherent sentence, i asked him when he knew that his career was right for him. when he knew he actually wanted to be a doctor. he paused, and then he laughed, and he said, with total sincerity: “my third year of residency.”
for some reason, that made me hang in there. maybe it shouldn’t have. for the first two years of my three year program, I HATED being a lawyer. it was miserable. i hated the people i went to school with, hated the values they had.
i took an internship position the summer after second year at a family law firm, drafting briefs and motions. my third year i worked as a student attorney for the school’s immigration legal aid clinic, representing clients in their deportation proceedings. for the first time, i liked what I was doing. it made sense. it felt right. THAT was when I knew I wanted to be an attorney. when i actually got a chance to do it. not before.
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peoplcshope · 5 months
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GET TO KNOW YOUR ADMIN !!
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name — Jay
pronouns — I'm/Him j/k he/him
preferred comms — Discord or LINE granted I'm sometimes slow with replyin' mostly due to work and at other times it's distractions like gaming. Or maybe some errands.
name of muse — Trunks Briefs
experience in RP — over ten years, started first on a site called Myspace then drifted through different other roleplaying sites and forums until I eventually gotten here.
best experiences — I once had to answer a question like this on another blog and the answer was just...man too much too ready because the experiences were countless. Whenever I meet a mun and then we just hit it off to the point we're discussing our muses for hours and hours over discord. Or even doing little mini threads on discord, those are really THE best experiences in roleplay.
pet peeves/dealbreakers — When people get on my ass for a response, little 'hey I'm just reminding you that you still probably have a post of ours lost in drafts or BLESS the people that link me to something I missed through the activities. Those peeps are a Godsend but the fuckers that just dick ride you for a response? They can go to tell, harrassing you for a response day in and day out like bro that'd make your reply even LESS than a priority. This shit's a hobby, not our lives.
muse preference ( fluff, angst, smut ) — I don't have much of a preference, I'd say give me ALL OF THOSE but I mean if I HAD to choose one It'd be angst. Oh people that knows me KNOWS I love putting not just mine but my writing partner's muses through emotional damage.
plot or memes — Give me a meme any day. I love plotting too but with plotting comes over-excitement and there's gonna be a moment IN the story you're plotting that you just CAN'T wait to get to but your ass has to wait because LORD knows it could be after the roleplay's timeskip or even far down the line into the future. Then again even with memes eventually that thread is going to be thought about and plotted..can't win XD
long or short replies — Write what you feel I always say (and it's not cause i'm bad at long posts I swear XD) sometimes when things need a little explanation you gotta go all out and send something long but sometimes that's not the case and it's okay.
best time to write — For me it's just at the crack of 4AM or 5AM when i wake up for work and then a little after im back by evening. Those are really my best times to write.
are you like your muse?: NOT AT ALL, not even a little bit, in personality he's nicer than I can ever be, temperament I'm even further behind, believe me I WISH I could be like Trunks but if I'm honest I CAN DO WITHOUT HIS TOUGH LIFE. The man may look like he's got everythin' goin' for him with how he looks, carries himself and whatnot but he's got WAY too much shit going on for me to actually want that life.
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tagged: @particlecreator , @swordsxandxsakuras (thanks for tagging yo boy :D)
tagging: @acoldsovereign , @kiealer , @n3rdb0x , @hopefromadoomedtimeline , @infintasmal , @universestreasures , @eternalbxtterfly , @crimsontwins , @kaguyahiime , @ofhope , steal this one homies and tag me so I can learn a little bit bout you.
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bismuthburnsblue · 6 months
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pre project write up: the coat!
ill keep this short (for me) because i worked through most the details with the wearable mockup from last year, but i wanted to reintroduce this project & the fabrics ill be using :)
This is the final version of my winter coat project, which i am starting at a great time (ill probably finish this well after its gotten cold!) Ive started with a base of McCalls M6800, because im not super confident in my ability to draft a pattern with the correct ease for this type of garment. Ive made some minor fittings (far too much room in one of the front seams for me, and i took some volume out of the skirt area. the shoulders were. weird. i honestly wouldnt rate this pattern super highly it had some grading issues that should have been caught, but it serves my purposes) and now i should be ready to go! i wont be following the instructions very much but theyre pretty basic anyway, so ill just go my own way and see where i end up!
this is kind of the inspo if you want a visual!
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the main body of the coat will be made out of this gorgeous, velvet like wool (i think its a blend?). In true Nyx fashion, its black and absolutely impossible to photograph. its probably one of the most expensive fabrics ive ever bought but i looked through dozens of options and this was by far the best one i found. im really particular about textures and this one is just, so nice, and its quite thin for a wool (not in a bad way, its just compact rather than fluffy) which is something im going to appreciate with the amount of fabric in this coat.
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Next: the lining! given that i was going to all this effort to make my own coat, i wanted this to be a completely unique garment, in every aspect, including the lining. I knew i wanted something with a design on it, and something that was a dramatic contrast to the outside, so when i saw this gorgeous 'chinese brocade' fabric i knew it was the perfect thing. Its very much. not a lining fabric and was past the budget i had in mind for my lining but i didnt see anything that came even remotely close to this in my mind so i caved and bought it. Even a year on im still enamoured with it and hope i have some left over to use for other things! I did get extra of the slippery black satin i used to line the mock up coat and i plan to use that to line the sleeves just for the extra glide, but ill use this for the main body.
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one last fabric! one of the changes i wanted to make from the red version was to add a fur collar so i tracked down the softest faux fur you have ever touched! again awful to photograph, but its perfect, and it was by weight, so now i have a huge piece of this :D
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i do also want to make note of the buttons i picked! theyre absolutely gorgeous and i, once again, hunted for ages to find the perfect option and here they are! they photograph a lovely colour but irl the gold is a little pink toned so my extra ass has bought some rub n buff to tone them into a better shade. yes. the buttons. for my coat. listen.
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im generally happy with my mock up, but there are a few changes i want to make. the obvious one was one that was in the plans from before i even started the red one, which was changing the collar. i wasnt super sold on it in the first place and the further in i got, the more i wanted a fur collar! since i have so much of my fur, im also planning on adding it around the cuffs and i do keep tossing up doing the whole hem but i think that might be a little much.
The other major change i want to make is to how i finished the coat. im actually pretty happy with the hemming method i chose for the reasons i chose it, but for this version i want to do something different. the plan this time is to do a facing in the outer fabric on the lining pieces and have that completely attached through the inside, removing any opportunities for the lining to show unintentionally.
Theres also a couple of minor fit things i want to change, i want to add more width to the back in case this fabric is tougher than my mockup, i want to rethink how i did my buttons because that made me miserable last time, and i want to add a little length to the hem. oh and better pockets! i need to give it my mega pockets. but overall im pretty much ready to go straight into it! im so nervous
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galactigoos · 1 year
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What Happened Last Night Pt.3 - Jack Russell x Reader
Summary: Lycanthropy, much like periods, turn out to be a multi-day monthly annoyance.
Warnings: Some injury, being grumpy, retail jobs (the horror!), and only a little bit of Jack. :( Sorry. You both need space after you called him a monster. You did, not me, don’t blame me.
Word Count: ~1.7k
A/N: lol hi. its been months and idk if anyone cares about this anymore other than the sweet souls who pushed me to publish another chapter. I would like to write more. I’m fairly certain this is going to be less than ten parts total, and that seems like something I can finish.
In other news im fucking obsessed with Red Dead Redemption II so lowkey might write something for that once this is over.
Oh also I changed my url from @ / ABitGryffindorky to @galactigoos. I wanted to make my AO3 and tumblr match, make them different than my other socials so fanfic doesn’t come up when a job searches me, and JKRowling is a terf bitch. Oh and I had a stalker so thats really what prompted the change lol.
Cross-posted on AO3, as always.
Part 1, Part 2
Perhaps you hadn’t really thought through this whole running away thing. It only took about two minutes for your broken ankle to really catch up to you. Pain radiated through your ankle, spiking with every step, no matter how light it was.
But you wouldn’t go back. Not to him. So you soldiered on, picking up a large stick to serve as a cane along the way. By sheer luck, you successfully wandered back to your house.
Your poor house. The one-story little shack had its back door ripped off the hinges. A few of your dining chairs had given their lives in service of your moon-induced freakout last night. Your bedroom door had slammed against the wall so forcefully the knob was stuck in the drywall.
Leaving most of the carnage for a better day, you placed the back door into its rightful place so no animals would get in. Well, no other animal besides yourself. The thought brought a humorless laugh forward. The absurdity of the situation, the sheer isolation you now faced, piled onto you, forcing you to the floor in a fit of delirious laughter.
You kept laughing. Past when your lungs tired, past when your laugh became more of a shaking wheeze, past the tears that had accompanied your anguish. You couldn’t stop. You laughed until your tired, broken body could no longer handle the strain, and you succumbed to the gentle relief of unconsciousness.
At least this time when you woke up naked in the forest, you weren’t caught in any traps. You were alone and relatively unharmed aside from a long gash ripping up your torso.
You groaned as you hauled yourself to your feet. When you stood, your ankle made its presence known. But it was not the scream for attention you faced yesterday, but more of a soft yell. It felt much, much better, but still carried enough pain to force you to limp.
Was this going to happen every fucking night?
… 
After calling into work and once again resetting your back door (thankfully your only damage this time), you decided you needed a plan. If this was going to keep happening, you could not keep running into the woods stark naked. You were out of sick days at work and were already well past your skill level in home repairs. 
So you spent the day modifying the leaky, cold cellar beneath your house. It couldn’t be called a basement. The cottage you had inherited was old. Like so old, the best way to deal with flooding was to build a cobblestone wall under your house with a space for water to run through. The cellar had now been reinforced with concrete, but the drain structure remained the same. The space was unused by you, given the room was designed to flood. So you didn’t have to clear anything out; what you did have to do was secure it. 
The cellar was entered through a door in your kitchen. Down a short flight of stairs, there was another door, this one metal, to keep out a draft. You dug through junk drawers and your shed to find every lock you could, and set to work securing them all to the door from the stairs. You even hauled your mattress to be propped up against the door for some added weight. After triple checking the locks, you grabbed a bottle of NyQuil and went outside.
There, you were able to remove the mesh that normally protected your cellar from debris, and squeezed yourself through the drain opening. Thank god the old motherfuckers that built this shack left a big enough hole. 
By now, it was the middle of the afternoon. You did everything you could to stay awake, despite the exhaustion of the previous two days threatening to pull you under. You talked to yourself, you sang, you worked out. Anything.
And when it started to get darker, you paced anxiously. You removed your clothes (no point in destroying another outfit) and prayed that the werewolf would not be able to fit through the gap to the outside world. At the last second you could bear to wait, you chugged the NyQuil. Hopefully, a tired werewolf was a less destructive one. And hopefully you didn’t just overdose on NyQuil.
You’ve never been so happy to wake up on a cold slab of concrete. Apparently, a tired werewolf was unable to claw through your defenses. There were scratches along the cellar walls and the doorknob had been bitten into a shape resembling a crumbled wad of paper, but you were still in your house. You redressed and crawled out of your night’s sanctuary.
You had sustained a rather ugly cut across your face, going over the bridge of your nose, narrowly missing your eyes. You pictured the wolf trying to rub the sleep from its tired, drugged eyes, which was… slightly endearing? As you were otherwise unharmed, you went about your normal morning routine, with about ten times your regularly required caffeine.
It wasn’t until you were stumbling off your bike in the parking lot of the tavern that you realized your ankle didn’t hurt. You were limping still, but there was no pain. And addressing the rest of your body quickly, you noticed that most of your wounds had healed. The gash on your stomach was still tender, but even your ear had repaired itself, leaving just an angry scar and a knick on the outside edge of your cartilage where you must’ve taken a chunk clean off. All things considered, you weren’t doing too bad.
Your boss ignored your haggard state, not that you had expected him to give a shit. Mr. Glendon was always too caught up in tending to the lush garden beside the pub to notice much about his employees. As long as you did your job well enough that he didn’t have to do his, he was happy.
In a zombified state you went through the motions of customer service, serving coffee, pancakes, and toast with a smile. Internally, you were cursing this stupid fucking establishment for being open from 6AM-2AM and requiring you to drag yourself to a goddamn pub for a breakfast shift. You were so tired you hadn’t read the name on the DoorDash order you packaged. You could not as easily ignore the man who walked in to pick it up.
When the bell above the door rang, you smiled and automatically started a welcoming comment, but froze mid-sentence when your eyes met Jack’s. He froze too, halfway through the door, glancing behind him like he was ready to forget the mediocre waffles sitting behind the counter. 
“Come on,” you grumbled, gesturing him inside.
“Lo siento. I was just grabbing us breakfast before we leave town. You won’t have to see me again. I had no clue you work-”
“Waffles, Jack,” you said, cutting him off and shoving the bag at him.
“Right, waffles,” he replied, grabbing the bag and getting out his wallet, and shoving five dollars into the tip jar before you could stop him. “Okay. I’m sorry. Goodbye, y/n.”
He spun to leave. You wanted to let him. He was dangerous and had likely gotten you into this mess. But at the same time, he was the only one who could help you through it. So you had to stop him. He was almost out the door when you called his name. Well, more accurately you whispered it, as part of you was hoping he wouldn’t hear you and you wouldn’t have to keep him in your life. His werewolf senses threw a wrench in your plan, and he spun on his heel and came back to you. He didn’t say anything, just looked at you. His eyebrows were knit with worry, and he tilted his head slightly like the stupid fucking dog he was.
“How much longer? I can’t keep,” you looked around and lowered your voice, “transforming every night.”
Jack let out a breath he was holding, apparently relieved you weren’t about to continue your name-calling of your previous encounter.
“You’re done for this month, cariño. Three days a month. It’s manageable,” he said with a reassuring smile. He looked tired, even more so than you did. You wondered what he had been doing while you were having a meltdown and playing Doomsday Preppers: Werewolf Edition. 
You nodded, relieved in the knowledge that you would have a reprieve now.
Jack cleared his throat. “I know you do not want me around, but perhaps I could put you in contact with some others like us? It’s tough to figure out all on your own.”
“You want me to tell more people? Absolutely not!”
He held up his hands in a placating gesture. “Alright, I wanted to offer. Best of luck, y/n. I won’t bother you again. If you need anything,”  he said, ripping the receipt from his bag and snatching a pen from a cup on the hostess station, “Here’s my number.”
You stared at the scrap of paper offered to you, and hesitated before taking it.
“I’m not trying to impose on your life. I just want you to have help if you need it. No strings attached,” Jack said, filling the silence. You took the paper and shoved it into your back pocket. Jack gave you a tight smile and a nod, and left.
You weren’t given much time to ponder the interaction as the demands of your job quickly stole your focus away from Jack.
After work, after your commute home, and after your door fell out of its frame when you tried to enter your own home (you had forgotten it was no longer on its hinges), you were staring dumbly at your mattress-less bed frame. It took you a full minute to remember that your mattress was shoved against your basement door. You huffed, making your way to your couch, as there was no way you were going to bother with lugging your mattress up a flight of stairs after an 8 hour shift.
This was unsustainable. Your house was in shambles, your body scarred, and you were alone and ill equipped to handle any of this. You texted Jack before you could think better of it.
.
.
.
*Cue werewolf training montage*
Also cue Jack jumping up in down at excitement at getting a text.
“See, Ted? I knew she would text! I’m glad we stayed an extra night :D”
Feedback, criticism, comments, reblogs, and likes are all always appreciated. Please tell me what you think! I apparently forget about fics unless you guys hound (pun intended) me about them.
Tags: @starfirette, @nicolewithanee, @fangurldayandnight, @zakizigekwe, @for-bebbanburg, @missdragon-1, @howlingco, @arvalee-knight, @emiemiemiii, @spicydonut25, @sparkythefallen1, @girlymusiclover09, @pxl8ed, @littlenosoul, @lemmons1998, @may4ri, @i-am-iron-man-3000, @maxppt
If anyone wants to be added or removed from the taglist lmk!
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minheeskitten · 5 months
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"2k is long" is also nonsense i'm so sorry 😭 2k is barely anything if you're trying to introduce an AU and actually flesh in a setting and especially if you're trying to show different personality traits 😭 your fic are mostly AUs with really well thought out lore, and it needs the word count to breathe and establish everything. if someone's attention span is too short to read more than - what - 2 pages? that's their problem, not yours! fwiw, my fic lengths range with the shortest starting at around 5k and the longest getting close to 30k and i have never had anyone leave a complaint about the length! people are more than willing to sit through 10k+ just to get to the smutty stuff, and they usually end up enjoying the rest of the fic as well. do not worry about it! you're doing just fine 🩷
I don't often look at the length of a fic unless im updating someone on how long its getting. My shortest wip is 100 words. And. Ive posted it to here bcs i feel it'll never be finished.
If it does get finished eventually then i will post it as a fic but. Until then it sits in my drafts.
My fics almost always include worldbuilding to at least 3k now. Though not all of them were like that.
Do you want in on a secret? I don't think out the world for my aus. It fleshes itself out. I think on what may happen n go from there. The story writes itself. I am just a vessel for the words and visions.
I am absolutely terrible at worldbuilding if im doing it consciously.
Its why i have visible headcanons for idols. But i just can't put them into words haha.
The most i think through is 'what sort of details would enhance this and make it better to read'
And then thats where i go from!
Siren!ivan was originally supposed to be more non-con than it is rn. The consent is not proper consent tho but thats bcs. Well. Siren wants what he wants and he will convince dann to give it to him.
Though. Thats a little bit of a spoiler. It is going to be tagged accordingly. Don't worry ill tag fics right.
The fic i thought through the most, probably is one ive not even started wtiting. The dissection fic. I gotta do all sorts of research so i can make sure its accurate and well done.
Which unfortunately means i gotta look at anatomy from a more medical standpoint. Need to go find a book for that..
The first fic i put out actually has a very strong plot hole. That i told myself id patch before posting it but. I didn't.
That plot hole was the reasoning as to why ivan was doing that to hwon. It has a very weak reason and i could absolutely fix it now. But. Not this year.
I write ab 5k minimum most of the time haha. I prefer letting the story fill itself out n then helping fine tune details. Its why i really can't tell you how long a fic may be.
So far my longest fic is 16k words. Published. Theres more unpublished. That's for the abandoned but not orphaned one.
I may return to it eventually. That's why i didn't wanna orphan it.
All of my fics stop at a point they organically would have stopped at. When i feel it can't really take another scene. I end it. That usually leaves spaces for part twos to them as well!
But i like exploring aus as i write them.
Fun fact! I write aus bcs im worried that if i do anything else i may accidentally copy someone else's idea.
I do get inspired by the other kd writers. Oh gods do i get inspired.
Lee, lunar, eve, even erin, who encourages the hwonicide. They all inspire me in their own ways. Does that usually come in the form of a prompt to note down asap? Yeah.
But other ways are helping with details for fics. And they are all very welcome to chat ab fics w me. I don't steal ideas. Not without permission and changing it to be my own.
I have a prompt that is inspired by eve's fic Clear My Mind (eve is karmacumover btw!)
But it is different. I may show her the prompt itself if she wants to see it haha.
But i love working on fics. Even if I can't be proud of them as a 'look i made this!' i can still look at the work and go 'yeah. Thats good.'
Thank you lee for helping me figure out how to do that. It was amazing to be able to step back and go 'thats a good story' if i removed myself from it.
The lee im referring to here is intenselysalmon. So she knows who im referring to.
One day. One day my goal is to be proud of how much I've written. Of what I've written.
Its a goal i think is far away. But the more i talk to other writers. The more i realize.
Im not as bad at writing as i think i am.
Honestly id never even considered myself a good writer, until i asked writers like lee and erin their feedback on my works. And they both said i write well. Maybe a little dialogue heavy but. Thats fine i can work on it.
Im doing my best. And im trying to ensure i continue getting better.
The more i talk to other writers and see how they talk ab my writing. The more i go. 'maybe im too harsh on myself' but. As they say, you are your own worst critic.
Honestly i never even considered my work good enough to do much with. But. Lunar still offered to possibly do a collab or fic trade. And i keep thinking on it. Maybe.
It makes me think they find me a better writer than i find myself to be.
Then i see eve, reacting to some of the xlips of airen!ivan ive put out. And she's reacting as i would for any of lee's clips. I find lee an amazing writer. It seems eve thinks of me that way too.
Im trying to wrap my head around it. But the reason i am so harsh on myself is. Anxiety and self doubt. And i need to work through them.
Thats the first time ive admitted that.
I will work through my weaknesses, and be better than before. Slowly. It takes time. I have to be patient.
One day. One day i will be able to proudly say 'im a good writer'
Its not today. But. It will be an eventuality.
Moots mentioned in this post:
Lee (@intenselysalmon )
Erin (@kurenaiwataru )
Eve (@karmacumover )
Lunar (@kingdoms-babygirl )
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devondespresso · 26 days
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1, 25, 81, 94 for the fanfic ask game! <3
KOKO HELLOOOOOOO ad thank you so much for the ask 💕💗💖💞💝 i went a little wild and had to reign it back in a bit and its still pretty long so apologies in advance
(ask game we're talking about is here but i also have questions next to the answers)
1. do you know how you want the story to end when you start, or are you just stumbling through the figurative wilderness hoping to find a road?
for the vast majorty of my fics i think i have a pretty good idea of where its going to go, i think because i get the ideas of these cool scenes usually set in act 2 or 3 or i at least the vibe i want from the start and The Point is usually clear the second i put thought into it. currently the only exceptions are 1) this super secret (woooo~~~) ficlet im working on that came from a prompt so i had to spend like 3 or 4 days writing it to properly understand the direction i wanted to take it, and 2) the steve henderson au, which is fucking massive already and it's even bigger in my head stnzgns. that one you obviously know how it ends y'know, it aint the steve henderson au if steve doesnt become a Henderson, but for all the arcs i have along the way it took a while to properly figure out what i doing and how to do that and im just now figuring out what that looks like for the first major arc.
so tldr: usually i know, sometimes i gotta figure it out, but i do need to have it figured out before it can really take shape
25. what’s your revision or rewriting process like?
oof ok so i tried writing this and good fucking god explaining everything i do in editing took up so much space. so this is the short answer for convenience but if anyone wants a long answer im foaming at the mouth to talk about writing stjsnystn (the rest under the cut)
the majority of my process is editing and sometimes first drafts are literally unrecognizable from the final. a lot of how i edit line by line is intuitive/vibes based, and whole scenes/arcs/pacing/flow/theme etc etc is based on a really deconstructed thought process for storytelling, to put it as briefly as i can (because this is one of the parts that got really long) its about The Why of everything going into the story. Picking details or making decisions not based rigidly on formula or trends but instead whats best for the kind of story you want to tell (and then making sure to implement it in a way that actually does that in the story).
for small works i prefer to just change shit as i see it and not worry about doing focused passes through the work, but in the steve Henderson au i literally cannot its too fucking big smhdmyxyn so in that case i do passes that span like whole writing sessions just hyperfocused on this one thing. one of my favorite passes is in-character passes where i pick one person (often dustin bc hes a main character), rewatch them a ton to get in their headspace, and go back and make sure everything they say or do fits them as if they were the sole focus if the story. I'll also do passes to focus just on medical accuracy, passes for a specific character duos to keep their story progressing and consistent, passes for ideas that stay between the lines making sure they stay consistent and understanding how much information im conveying, character's specific mindsets that their arc is about and making sure they dont have any unintentional exceptions, literally if its a thing in the text i probably need to do a pass for it so i know its consistent
also more lighthearted stuff tends to need wayyyy less editing time and its a more balanced half solo half beta process. the easiest was the claudia henderson drabble because it was really just a backstory with an active scene or two all rooted in her outside persective.
also sometimes i just start from scratch halfway through, like mr crayola henderson has one previous half-complete version in my doc fhdlas tho i guess thats how drafts are supposed to work
and this is the tldr im sorry i dont want to cut it down any more just read this one its my favourite fdhaskl
81. if you could go back in time and give your younger self a piece of writing advice specific to you, what would it be?
honestly i wouldn't have much to tell them. i didn't start writing fanfic until july of last year?? something like that and i started with the steve henderson au. maybe don't write that one about the triggering thing lol.
actually wait no. id tell them its okay to abandon projects (and maybe tell them not to make some purchases dgnxngsyn) but ye i spent a while mourning projects because they felt like they ceased to exist, but i had several screenplay outlines that probably helped me a ton. in my writing and those experiences never leave me so their existence still had a purpose and value
tldr: dont write your very recent triggers silly goose, dont cry over abandoned art
94. do you prefer dialogue or description?
i definitely prefer dialogue, and with it action descriptions because i still think in movie-medium (tho i am getting better at understanding how the FUCK prose works and especially prose pacing oh my god why can't i just hold on an actors face for several seconds of silence gAAH!!). i like saying things without saying them, i like subtly building towards something body language until a snap, i looooove making blocking relevant in a medium where you're not even seeing the movement with your eyes, and i love getting into a characters head so far that each person has a different way to word something or a different detail they focus on or a certain tick that tells the other character whats in their head.
but i struggle with internal monologue sooooooo hard, its a practiced skill im actively working on to write a characters internal logic about something but still keeping it from being too on the nose about whats really going on. like i can do it but i struggle to fill page time with it because exploring ideas at least for me usually leads to the source and thats decidedly not where the characters going! its a tuesday afternoon! they're not unpacking shit they're trying to have a third coffee!! i also struggle finding the best words for the reader to feel the text, like idk man maybe im using the onelook dictionary wrong but it just does not get me what im looking for in under three looks zgnshnsyn
tldr: dialogue and blocking, good description is witchcraft
_
but yee thank you again for the ask dude!! this was so much fucking fun i fucking love talking about writing and the logic process behind everything. thanks anyone seeing this for actually reading this far 💕
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neonsbian · 4 months
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hi vinnie <3 since you’re like my resident writing oomf i gotta ask: do you have any tips on motivating & inspiring yourself to write and get through a writer’s block? seeing you post about your writing is so inspiring but i’ve been struggling for months now rip </3
hmmm tbh i dont rlly have a good answer for you other than teach yourself self-discipline. ive been writing for almost a decade (crazy to think abt lol) and in that time ive basically had to teach myself to commit to writing.
writing is just like any other artform, it's a skill that you build gradually by practicing consistently. the best way to do this is to come up with a goal in your mind and actually work towards this. i don't mean like, deciding you want to write a novel and just writing right away (though that does work for some people) but building steps to slowly achieve that goal.
let's say you want to write a novel. great! the first thing i would do is find time in my schedule to write. a lot of people assume that means sitting down for hours at a time and just typing away but finding time to do that in todays society isnt easy and personally, it's more effective for me to find gaps and short moments to just write for a bit. for me, the most writing gets done when im constrained for time. and you don't have to do it all at once! you can write a little bit at different points of the day too.
i also plan what im going to write before i write it. this doesn't mean i outline necessarily (i don't do that until the second draft) but before writing a scene, ill have a vague idea of what i want to happen in that scene. sometimes it changes as im writing but i never go into writing without a vague idea of what's going to happen.
i think setting a daily goal for yourself is really important. i know writing everyday seems kinda daunting, especially if you didnt do that before but like i said, writing is a skill you build gradually by practicing consistently and you have to be consistent. your daily goal can be a certain page count, word count, or chapter count. whatever works for you. i personally don't rlly like using quantifiable units as my daily goal bc that makes me like check the word count obsessively and prefer to use story markers as my goal instead. basically, i decide before writing i want to reach a certain point in the story by the end of the day. sometimes im in over my head and have to adjust, but it's more useful to think abt it that way for me.
also, if you're just starting out, i would make my daily goal relatively simple and easy to achieve. if word count is how you're counting it, then i'd set it to like 500 words. you might feel frustrated with how slow your progress is but it's more effective to slowly build a story than to write a huge chunk in a short amount of time and then never touch it again. and even if the progress is slow, at least progress is happening!
i know a lot of people have said this but you're also gonna have to allow yourself to write badly. i feel like this something that's difficult to implement into your mindset but it's essential to teach yourself this or else you'll never get anything done. shitty writing doesn't mean you're a shitty writer, it just means that your writing needs more work and the only way to achieve that is by working on it consistently.
i also personally think it's helpful to read the writing processes of other writers and try doing them yourself. lauren groff, for example, writes her entire second draft from memory which sounded absolutely insane to me but i tried it for one of my short stories. that method didn't really work for me but from her method helped me improve my own system. basically for scenes that were in the first draft but were going to be changed pretty drastically, i don't open my first draft at all and just write the scene. every writer's process is different and what works for one writer isn't always going to work for you, but it's still worth a shot to try it and one way or another, it'll help you understand yourself as a writer better.
to me, writing is self-discipline as much as it's art and building a system that works for you is going to take some time but it's necessary to achieve what you're hoping to achieve.
this ended up being longer than i expected but tldr: set a goal, do it everyday 👍
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elphabaoftheopera · 8 months
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HELLO!!!! how are you? it's been a while haha 😅... but, long story short, after watching wicked last night im back in the fandom! and what better way to celebrate than read a fic by my favourite author 🥳 ? so, i read "In Any Universe", and boy do i have a lot of good things to say about it!!!!!
this fic is awesome, im sad that i didn't read it earlier! it had my favourite tropes that were amazingly executed, along with so many wacky and interesting alternate universes 😁😁! some that stood out to me were fake dating, masquerade, family and musical. to say that i really enjoyed these would be an understatement!!!! first of all, fake dating is my absolute favouriteee trope, so i was so so excited to see it applied to fiyeraba so well! the masquerade was honestly a really interesting plotline, and the musical universe was cool to see referenced! and family au was soo adorable, and parents fiyeraba make me feel so happyyyy ❤️❤️! overall, they were all so so romantic and cute and made me realise how much i miss fiyeraba 🥺!! i also really liked the general storyline, and the pipeline of fiyero coming to terms and accepting his situation was so lovely and satisfying to read!
i was wondering if you had any little facts about this fic? it was super creative and i couldn't help but love every separate storyline!!!!!
sorry for gushing, im just super happy to be back and reading your fics again! ill hopefully in the fandom again for a while, so i can find the time to read some other works of yours and maybe reread 😁😁😁
@melop-sia!!!!! It's so wonderful to hear from you!!!! Welcome back to the Wicked fandom! Your message just made my entire day, I actually screamed when I read that I was a favorite author of yours, words like that TRULY go a long way. thank you for your thoughts on In Any Universe. I had so much fun writing that one!
Welllllll since you asked, I'd love to share a little bit about it!
Light spoilers for In Any Universe below the cut!
The idea came to me when I was just thinking a lot about fanfiction tropes in a loving way, inspired by fanfiction writers and our tendency to put the same characters into countless different situations/lives and have them fall in love all the same. I got the idea when I was driving (most of my ideas come when I'm driving) about my otp essentially going on a "tour" through the different tropes. Initially it was supposed to be 100% comedic and self aware.
I didn't have a strong throughline planned out in the beginning that would set them off on their journey. I thought about (and even drafted) Fiyero mentioning how "random" it was that they got together and if any one thing was different they'd probably not be together, then I'd have Elphaba take offense to that. But it just wasn't working, especially because I was clinging to the idea that I wanted Fiyero to be human in the present timeline. Once I finally released my hold on that idea and let him be a Scarecrow, the story throughline became much clearer to me! It was easier to write when Fiyero had a "lesson" to learn (sort of "It's a Wonderful Life" style, though I've never seen that movie). That of course made the throughline a bit more serious, as well as some of the timelines getting increasingly darker.
I just can't resist angst and hurt/comfort no matter how hard I try!
I just really love the quote I put at the beginning of the story about finding the same person over and over.
As for the stories within the story, I just started by making a list of as many tropes I could think of. Fake dating, fix-it fic, crossover, etc. and eventually trimmed it down to the stories that made the cut. I wrote them all out of order and then stitched them together later with the throughline story. I think I did the coffee one first, then the masquerade, and then I put it down for several months (as is my style) and picked it back up with the Wicked actor one.
I really considered breaking the story up into chapters and sometimes I regret the fact that I didn't, I still consider breaking it up because I know it's very long. Still I think it flows better as a singular piece but at least can be easily read in multiple sittings if you're like me and need mind breaks.
When I decided to make it one single piece I made a real effort to keep the sections snappy and not longer than they needed to be. I was pretty obsessed over word count and keeping it below a certain amount (I think 1000 words). I think the Fake Dating one ended up being the longest and the hardest to keep trimmed. Still, I wanted each story to have a satisfying arc in its own way.
One challenge I gave myself (which was VERY difficult) is that I didn't use the word "love" until the very end when Fiyero told Elphaba he loved her after getting shot. I came to that idea later on and had to edit a lot of the earlier stories. Then he says he loves her many times in the finale scene.
I thought it strengthened his lesson about being grateful for what they did have. I found it really important to mirror the "can't imagine thinking about how things might be different" (paraphrasing) in the worst timeline with her dying in the cornfield with what he'd said in the beginning.
As for the ending I did leave it slightly ambiguous, but I believe as the writer that the journey he went on was real and not a dream (kind of like I believe that in Wizard of Oz Dorothy's experience really happened, even though it seemed like Dorothy was waking up from a dream). However, I wanted to the reader to decide for themself!
I think my favorite ones to write were the Fiyeraba family (I love them as parents!), Coffee shop AU, and the Masquerade. I also found it clever and trippy to do the Wicked actors, but that one was by far the hardest challenge!
I so appreciate your readership and engagement with my work!!!! Please reach out in the future if you ever have thoughts or questions.
I don't want to jinx it because it's still early days but I'm excited to say I've been writing again (Fiyeraba, obviously) now that my life has more time. We'll see where it takes me, so be on the lookout!
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thughisee-blog · 11 months
Text
Violets and lavender
A (Lesbian) short story
Since its pride month I thought it might be fun if I shared the rough first draft of a short story im debating working on. I wrote it after listening to seven (for the millionth time) because I always picture the same two characters when I do. Idk why but to me seven just feels so…gay. And not just gay, but two southern girls who’ve loved each other from the moment they met in childhood.
This scene is their first introduction to each other (Im giggling for them just thinking about it!!)
So without further ado, I introduce you to my girls Celia and Arabella (Final names TBD)
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I met Arabella in the middle of a blizzard, which was quite typical of her. Me and twenty or so girls stood together teeth chattering while we waited for the teacher to get the fire going, when suddenly we heard the schoolhouse doors burst open. The chilled air flooded in and wigged its wind through our huddle. Disturbed and questioning why winter was even a necessary season I turned seething, wondering who would dare strip away the little bit of warmth I had managed to nurture. And there she was. My Arabella, nose pink and hair dark like charred wood. She looked like an angel, standing there with the white snow swirling around her. Thinking about it now, I loved her from the moment I saw her, I just didn’t have the words for that feeling yet. And I wouldn’t, not for a while. She hurried to shut the door “My apologies for being late! My mother is so bad with time”. I remember being slightly impressed with how she managed to come up with a plausible excuse that didn’t make it her fault. I would have likely been more impressed had she not let Father Winter in with her. The first thing I knew about Arabella other than that she was beautiful, was that she was not like any girl I had ever met. Her gloves were tattered and clearly at least a decade old. And her hat was clearly handsewn by someone with little knowledge of textiles. To top it all off when she unbuttoned her coat I could see all the different scraps of fabric that had been put in the lining in a poor attempt to fix the holes littered throughout. But despite the rest of her clothing indicating that she came from a house with little funds, her coat gave way to reveal a stunning red dress complete with lace and black detailing. I remembered a similar dress when my mother had taken me to the market with her. I had wanted it but she told me “Only girls with mothers who do not walk with the lord would wear red. Let alone lace”. When we had gotten home I was sent up to my room as mother planned on inviting people over for “adult time” as she called it. Later that night as I laid flat against the stairs and leaned close to the railing so I could peek in on her top secret meeting, I overheard her once again discussing that dress and calling it “Whorish”. And now here was this beautiful new girl who had brought in the cold and then brazenly showed off her whorish dress. I knew then that I must stay away from her, lest she sully my image and influence me in all the wrong ways. We had not yet spoken and yet my heart panged at the thought that we never would. I couldn’t understand it. Had she brought in the devil too?
Afterword: Truth be told theres a lot im unhappy with about this scene, and its clearly unfinished, but I know its just the beginning of a hopefully long and beautiful journey for me and my tow hopeless lesbians. I’ll see y’all in the next post!
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chihirolovebot · 2 years
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pspspspspspsp…………
hi!!!! i come bearing gifts! heeeere is physicist. i changed some aspects about them like turning the overalls from olive to black because i really enjoy the black/red/white palettes. i also gave them those gloves (for their science experiments where they mix chemicals up so their hands dont explode? i truly know nothing about physics). im definitely gonna overhaul their design at some point because i think they need more flair so they fit in with the rest of the dr cast yk. im still working on a full portrait of them atm (color shading etc etc) which i sincerely hope u will enjoy
also! i wanted to throw in here: PLEASE listen to me and michael + when you die (both my mgmt) if you haven’t already bc those 2 songs have kokichi/physicist written all over them.
the front pocket was not originally part of the overalls btw! they wanted a larger place to store more of their things so they clumsily tried to sew a pocket into an item of clothing without knowing much about sewing or anything. they were really bummed when it turned out looking weird but eventually came to enjoy the personality it added to their fit.
the kokichi doodle at the bottom is him playing with their glasses! they are basically just the talks a lot + listens dynamic,, also i feel VERY weird about kokichi’s hair i swear i messed up somehow while drawing it but i can’t figure out what exactly it was. the little stick figures of physicist and oma were me on my last brain cell but i think that’s them for the entire fic in a nutshell. oma likes to go on villain monologues and physicist is done with his bullshit!
the big physicist on the left is them posing for a picture! they look awkward because i imagine them being kinda camera shy. i also imagine whoever took the picture just kinda snuck up on them and snapped.
ah yes yes and the fan game! i’m partway through the prologue and if you want i can send you a short demo of the draft i have so far? so far it’s taken a turn from the traditional dr games since i got rid of the movement mechanic,, so now it’s more of like a VN than anything! i don’t know HOW i’m going to draw all the CGs and sprite customization options (thank you to @/goldentime for the idea by the way i really appreciate it :D) and write all the code as well as do the ost and decal and all that other stuff but i will find a way! somehow. it’s been really fun though and i’m actually very proud of what i have so far!!
anyways. ty for writing sleep awake! it’s crazy to me that such a long and gorgeously written fic is up on the internet for FREE. it’s definitely better than most original fiction is, and dare i say, much much better than the actual v3. i love what you did with chapter 3, the trial felt soo natural i forgot several times that it wasn’t what was in the actual game! it’s obvious how much time and effort you put into research, planning, and writing, and it really shows! so thank you <333
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HELPPPP OH MY GOD THESE ARE SO FUCKING CUTE!!! im literally sitting so giddy here rn!!! ur mc is so special to me i LOVEEEE how they look so much god their vibe is indescribable... giving sad wet kitten energy. want to wrap them in a fuzzy blanket and place them gently on a pile of newspapers.
the gloves r such a neat addition!!! the block colouring n black and red kind of reminds me of the persona 5 artstyle which is a huge compliment!!! i lov their hair... their lil glasses... the freckles.... so so cute. will be turning this version of mc over in my head Forever !
hehe the little kokichi interactions give me so much life. the one of him fiddling with their glasses is so immaculate and u have their vibe absolutely down pat, 'talks a lot' and 'listens' is simply just THEM!!! oh but it sometimes goes the other way around when mc starts rambling abt physics n ouma is jus. jus sitting there. absorbing it all. mc's little blush is adorable and i totally think kokichi would just fiddle with their glasses or clothes while talking. is he doing it on purpose?? who knows???
I HAVE LISTENED TO WHEN U DIE BEFORE (it was actually my first mgmt song!!!) and holy shit ur so right. my third eye has been so closed,, and urs has been so open. definitely feels like kokichi talking to the mc like, putting on this evil mean facade, wanting them to hate him so he can keep up with his mastermind shtick and keep them at arms length but sigh, they know him too well and the act isn't holding up. i listened to me and michael because i hadn't heard it before and yes yes YES i see the vision. the closeness of two people being affected by red flags or toxicity or just other people or outside factors.... god. thinking so so hard abt this now and they're both going on the sleep awake playlist!!!
I WOULD LOVE FOR U TO SEND ME WHAT U HAVE ALREADY FOR THE GAME WHAT!!! WHAT!!! holy shit. it turning out like a visual novel is probably ideal, right?? i dont know anything abt game development AT ALL so forgive me if i say something dumb but most fan games dont include all the complex mechanisms from actual danganronpa games and most tend to just either be youtube vids or click and point thingies or just. yeah. visual novels!! which is so good.
as for the cg's and stuff, i dont rly know :( i would offer to draw them myself if i was any good at art, basically all im good at is sprite edits but im trash at anatomy and stuff so i rly dont think i would be any help. i would suggest commissioning but thats probably way too expensive, and again, like. i would commission stuff myself but im so broke at the moment. i COULD always commission some stuff when my student finance comes in, because i'll have a bit extra this year as my accommodation is way less expensive. but we can cross that bridge when we come to it i think!!! whatever ends up happening will be more than fine by me!!! im literally so excited
thank u so so much again for this art and for the game which i cannot believe is a real thing!!! i will treasure these for life <33
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You've already written a book? Wow, that's impressive! I've always been writing but never quite finished anything. I have a lot of short stories stored in my computer and poetry in my various journals, but actually sitting down and committing to writing something for an extended period of time has always been difficult for me. I lose interest after a while, or get stuck on a scene and just give up on it. I have about three rough drafts of at least one hundred pages worth of material, but that's it. They stop there. How were you able to write your book? What is the story behind it? I know we writers hate when someone asks what our books are about, because it's not always about the plot, I would say, but more about the characters and the overarching themes present throughout the story, but I'm curious. I hope you don't mind me intruding in your ask box like this.
yoooo you're back!!! im so glad
yessss well i feel you really hard on the never finishing anything. I've always always been writing too, ever since i could but i never thought i'd get to write a book, quite honestly. i mean, i didnt even consider myself a writer until like last year and im fucking 25. i just kind of. wrote. didnt claim the "writer" title until one of my friends pointed it out like "hey, youre a writer" and i was like HUH?? so ya.
the way i wrote it was very circumstantial, honestly. i think in a way, thats what usually happens. a bit of circumstance, time, discipline, and most importantly PASSION is the perfect equation, at least for me. it was in a time when covid was coming to an end, i had a job but was out of work because i had broken my foot, and i had a whole room to myself cause i was living with my sister. i was also going through a david bowie obsession and listened to literally JUST THAT for three whole months. i wrote every day, all day. sometimes for 10 hours without really eating or drinking. i was OBSESSED. with this story, and these characters, and so im not really the person to ask how exactly you finish a book, because for me it was truly a near religious experience, like divine intervention type thing. it was like i was possessed. i couldnt stop. i loved it so much that it took over my whole life.
as for the stuck on a scene thing. honestly? like forreal forreal? you just have to change the scene that you thought you were gonna write. that's it. that's the answer. you just don't write that scene. you find something else. if its not coming to you like butter on a hot pan, sliding into your brain effortlessly and through your fingers, change it. or just don't write it. skip it. skip to another part of the story, or just straight up skip that scene and continue the story. im telling you, there aint not other way. you'll just stray further and further from that momentum you had, and get frustrated with yourself, and start overthinking your story, and all that, all for one scene that isn't even there.
and the dreaded discipline. look, we all hate it. the only thing you can do to combat the writers block is, and i cant emphasize this enough, write something else for a bit. put your story on pause, its okay, its always gonna be there, and write something with those same characters, but maybe theyre in an au, or another scene, or its just some little drabble of their lives. it helps immensely, even for your book. you get to develop their characterization, get to know them, their motivations, their speech patterns, and you get to have fun. it'll give you ideas, and once you're ready to kick yourself in the ass, go back to the book, and write one. fucking. sentence. just one. a shitty one. write a whole page without editing it as you go along. write simply and like youve never known what a sentence structure looks like, then when you're done, you can go back and edit. but its better to just write and have it be shitty but cohesive enough that its going somewhere, than to not write at all, right? thats my advice.
ok this shit is getting long as fuck and i didnt even answer your question as to what my book is about. i'll try to blurb it, for practice.
Set in 1973, it's about Percy, an astronomy loving eighteen year old Welsh guy with sleep apnea who moves to the city with his extremely religious parents. He finds a room through a new friend he meets at a bar, Gretchen, and moves in with Ren, a wearing-sunglasses-at-night sanguine type who's a storm about to ravage Percy's little village.
Ren has a secret room, secret hobbies, secret everything, and it drives Percy insane with prophetic dreams through his apneic episodes. With time, patience and a shared love of music, Ren begins to let Percy in on his tragic life, the person he lost and the reasons why he is the way he is, chaos personified. Percy begins to understand that he is a part of some equation, some mission Ren has been set on by the strange presence in their apartment.
The secret little room is the key to it all, and through the whispers in the trees and the voice in the walls, Percy will soon discover that Ren is not only someone who's happened to cross his path, but someone who he is falling in love with, someone fated for him. It's a story of self-discovery, mysticism, death, rebirth, redemption, friendship, and it's very gay. Very, very gay. Also set in the early 70s so there's the trials and tribulations of marginalized identities, good ass music, and a lack of electronic communication.
there are a lot of different elements to this story, like.... a lot of references to greek mythology, astronomy facts, sleep disorders, nightmare imagery, motifs, everything is all connected. Each character's name has a meaning to the story, and they all play a very important role. There's also like two plot twists and a secret character that i cant talk about heehee.
anyways FUCK this was crazy. i know you only asked like a couple of questions but im like sooooo into answering thoroughly. its honestly helping me understand some stuff, so thank you veryyyyy much for being curious, i really really appreciated. dont be shy if you ever want to come off anon and send me a message, im not gonna think anything weird of you lol. i know anon is like a safe way of lurking sometimes but id like to talk to you more if youre down.
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onlyswan · 1 year
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hi art!! I just recently came across ur acc and im curious abt some stuff like for one what are ur fave musicians to listen to ? Bc I remember the first thing I read from ur page - I forgot the name 😭 but it was when oc and jungkook kept meeting on a train while she was listening to cas and reading a book and omg since that moment I knew u were my favorite writer bc you were able to capture all my feelings and I just resonated with ur writings sm !! And I also have been using cas as my safe music for years now so seeing someone else also feels the same from years back makes me feel heard somehow !! I felt so safe and just so happy reading ur stuff like I forget about all my struggles I get excited to go to bed since my routine consists of reading ur stuff and it’s literally a daily thing now lol, and if u ever think about doing a long fic or even a novel pls do bc I am in LOVE with ur writing style you are able to capture the smallest details without dragging a story or make it boring you truly can bring stuff to life !! I used to read a lot and try and write poetry and sometimes stories too but thing got in the way and is slowly stopped but you made me remember why I love books so much and why I wish I couldve been a writer and that’s something so special !! also when did u first start stanning bts and have you ever been on the editing community lol? sorry for the rant and bombardment of questions and extreme enthusiasm but tbh I’ve realised that since I love ur fics so much I should start to get to know a bit about the writer and how you came across to writing them !! I hope u know how many peoples days you make better with these stories and ur so sweet too, keep being u !! :33
some of the other artists i listen to are txt, iu, frank ocean, beabadoobee, niki, mitski, fka twigs, omar apollo, hozier, the rose, wave to earth :D and i became an army during mots7! and i assume you meant writing community? :O but since i was like 9 i’ve been writing short stories and mainly poetry as a hobby and hid them all in the drafts. i never rlly published anything until i started this blog !
OMGSJDHDKDKF you’ve been here since gold rush!? this is so insane to me bcs i was pretty much mia in 2021 plus i was in my experimenting phase :| thank you so much for being here all these time !! 😭😭😭💗 i’m so happy we were able to connect through music <3 my favorite form of art <3
and i reallyyyy wish i can do a long fic but i have such a horrible attention span and committment issues lmao 😭 once i get annoyed or bored i immediately detach myself from something it’s a big problem </3 but thank you for your interest i can’t believe you would want to read an entire novel from me 🥹🥹🥹
I am in LOVE with ur writing style you are able to capture the smallest details without dragging a story or make it boring you truly can bring stuff to life !!
oh i’m gonna cry 🥲 i love you so much you have no idea how much i needed to hear this! i’m always insecure about being too much or too little with my writing so this is so comforting 🫂🫂🫂
and omg don’t be sorry i love this energy 🥹 !! i sometimes receive asks from ppl that seem to forget that there’s a real person running this account and that makes me feel dispirited so you’re such a breath of fresh air <3 thank you beloved for being so sweet and kind and reading my works it means the world to me 🤍🤍🤍
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