#they just would be so good and so fucking powerful my dudes ugh

[running-in-the-dark]

watching the second episode of Almost Paradise. okay, not a fun topic in this one, oof.

but. when the female cop said 'crap. he took off his hat. we're going in now!', that did make me laugh :')

also it's.. I mean. the high blood pressure thing is. surprisingly funny? like it's not funny funny. but it's very entertaining to me.

#I just. like this dude. he's a grumpy jerk. he's got that face. he has high blood pressure and he's old and he just took his cowboy hat #off because he's gonna fight some people :) #it's surprisingly endearing #(no it's not because he could play anyone and I would think aww that's so cute. nope not that at all. because I still don't like him) #and in this show he does that thing a lot where he talks when he's pissed off so his upper teeth are showing and. I. will admit that's good #his teeth are so fucking cute 😭 yes even his damn TEETH #it's just that that's the exact kind of teeth that I find incredibly adorable on literally anyone so it makes everything worse in this case #😩 #this is the stupidest show and I would 100% not like it without him but. well. #ugh now he's bleeding and he looks fucking cute and I think I just growled. I'm fine this is fine I'm handling it #he saved girls from being trafficked. #and he's grumpy again #man I love him #also the female cop. shit I need to learn her name. Kai (that's confusing). she squished his little face and I just. ugh I need to do that. #stupid soft squishy cheeks I need to. 😩 #okay okay I'm done. #also the kid from the beginning and ending of this episode is so incredibly adorable. #and. he shaves his arms but not his legs. good to know. interesting. weird but. fine. #and he always gets goosebumps. #lol my brain would be so powerful if I could focus on. literally anything but every stupid detail about a random stupid man that I don't #even LIKE. #okay I'm really done now. hey at least I'm being nice and leaving it all in the tags this time! #almost paradise #alex walker #man I am one stupid person #:') #but I mean. he just. he bought a fucking gift shop on an island he hadn't been to in 15 years. what's wrong with this man?! #everything. and I want him. 😌

[coldbronzemoon]

Danny Fenton, Totally Mortal Hero Consultant (DPxDC)

Snippet for an AU I'll probably never fully write where Danny takes a job as a consultant for the Justice League to help with ghost and demon bullshit. It's a pretty good cash flow to help him with college, after all, and very flexible hours.

He just claims all his knowledge comes from his parents. Unfortunately, the JL has caught word of the elusive yet active hero Phantom, and want Danny to help them meet and assess him. Whoops.

Over the phone, Tucker sighed. “Good Christ, Danny, why do you keep doing this?”

“I’m not doing anything,” Danny said immediately. He winced at the vague sound of screaming below. Demons sucked. “I didn’t know the JL thing was gonna have me finding Phantom. How would I? They were talking about tracking down powerful ghosts, I was assuming Ancients!”

Tucker sighed again, which was really quite unfair of him. “Mhm. Well, Fenton Catcher?”

“Probably not. They know me pretty well at this point, and unlike what Sam says I can be professional. I’d confuse them with the… uh…”

“Stoner shtick?”

There was more screaming happening, but judging from the pitch it was a demon screaming this time. Danny checked the situation. Yep, demon getting their ass kicked. He didn’t need to get involved with a blaster. Yet.

Instead, he scowled at his phone. “Stop calling it that.”

“You’re gonna tell me flanny Danny wasn’t a pitch-perfect stoner, huh? With the chill vibing and the dopey look?”

“I hate you.”

“Love you too, bud.” 

The sound of a clacking keyboard that had underlined their conversation stopped. “But seriously, Danny, what the hell are you gonna do with this?”

“Uh, lie, probably,” Danny said, because it was very likely.

“Alright, smartass, what are you going to do when that lie backfires on you like literally every other one does?”

“That’s when I start gaslighting, gatekeeping, and girlbossing, babe.”

He had a hard time hearing Tucker’s distant groan of “Why am I still your friend?” on account of the sudden explosion. Danny checked again. Hm. Demon dude had a nasty fire thing going on.

Danny switched on his Fenton water gun—holy water included!-- and shot the demon in the face. They let out a cracking hiss of rage, but dropped the fire spell thing. He waited for them to stop looking around wildly for the culprit for a moment. 

He went back to the call. “‘Cause you loooove me, Tuck. From the bottom of your twice-dead heart.”

“Unfortunately,” Tucker deadpanned.

Danny just cackled. It was lost amongst the sound of supernatural bullshit below.

“Anyway, I’m still figuring out my plan A, honestly. Might bring in gray-man?”

“Amorpho’s an asshole, though. He’ll ruin the whole thing by taking the opportunity to shift into a JL member for a bit.”

Hm. True.

“Yeah, but he’s the main guy I know with that power set.”

“Ask after Desiree?” He could hear the immediate distaste in Tucker’s voice. “Ugh, pretend I didn’t say that. That’s worse than Amorpho.”

“It’s awful,” Danny agreed easily. 

Desiree was actually pretty alright nowadays, mostly on account of Danny remembering the last couple minutes of Aladdin and wishing she could refuse wishes she didn’t want to grant. That had made her happy enough to stop actively picking fights. 

Unfortunately, spending the entirety of one’s afterlife twisting the wording of wishes to their worst form made it hard to stop being an asshole. Who knew! So getting Desiree to split him in two for like a week had a 50/50 chance of fucking up his work relationship with the literal league of superheroes irrevocably. And this was his main cash flow right now.

So, no Desiree, no siree.

“Come up with something better then, asshole.”

Danny hummed and, since the heroes below were focused on the demon, lifted up a little and did a thoughtful back flip. What to do, what to do…?

Oh!

“My cousin!” he exclaimed.

“What cous—? Oh, Ellie.”

“Yeah, Ellie, Tuck. Which other cousins do I have?”

Tucker scoffed. “You literally have that whole Nightingale thing going on through your dad?”

Danny couldn’t help the face he made. The remaining Nightingales were worse than his parents somehow. “The Nightingales don’t count.”

“You can’t just say they don’t count.”

“I can say that, actually, and I will. They’re, like, cousins through my great-great-great-grandpa anyway.”

“Isn’t there a fight going on over there? Should you be shooting someone?”

 “Yeah, probably.”

He peaked down through the window once more. The heroes must have gotten the first demon to leave while he was talking, because the horned demon fighting them now was a truly unfortunate shade of yellow-green instead of purple. Or maybe it had transformed for some reason? They had it about as in-hand as the other one, though, so Danny definitely didn’t need to go down there. He shot the maybe-new demon in the face real quick.

“Anyway, Ellie can totally help out, she’s been practicing with changing up her looks. She’s also more, uh, malleable than me, what with her situation and all. Looking fully like Phantom shouldn’t be hard.”

Tucker hummed. “She’d try to embarrass you though.”

“Yeah, that’s a problem.” Danny spun in place. “I could bribe her?”

“With what? Her life doesn’t involve needing much cash.”

“She doesn’t get out to the Zone very much. Not many of the inhabited places, anyway. I can promise her the weird apple things Dora’s been growing with Sam’s help, she loved those.”

“If you think that’ll work…” Tucker trailed off dubiously.

Danny laughed. “She’s annoying sometimes, but she’s not gonna fuck over my job if I ask her not to. I’ll just bribe her extra hard for resisting the temptation to mock me.”

“Fair enough.” The clacking of keys resumed. “I’ve really gotta pay attention now, someone’s trying to stop me from getting into this database. Someone half-decent, actually, did they upgrade? Hm. Make sure no one died, yeah?”

“They’re alive. Bye, Tuck,” Danny said, and ended the call.

He shoved his phone back into his jacket pocket and made his way down the stairs. The fight outside he had been stationed for was basically over—Captain Marvel and Green Lantern (Danny was pretty sure he had accidentally learned the dude’s actual name at some point, but hell if he could remember)—had pulled out the magic restraints one of the other consultants had handed out.

That had probably been Constantine. Ugh. Constantine. Dude could stand to lighten up a little; skulking and smoking all the time wasn’t the base state of someone enjoyable to be around. Then again, Danny knew he annoyed the shit out of some of the league with his own attitude, so he maybe shouldn’t talk. But at least he was annoying with a smile!

Case in point: Danny grinned at the heroes. “Got it handled?”

“Suppose so,” said the Green Lantern, “though a little more help would have been nice.”

Captain Marvel was too busy getting in a minor tussle with the demon to say anything either way.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m like, pretty mortal,” Danny said. “I’m not fucking with demons right where they can hit me. And I did shoot him!”

Green Lantern rolled his eyes, but admitted the point. Danny cheerfully flipped him off anyway.

“I’ll be heading out, then, the hellmouth this guy crawled out of is like three miles away.” Captain Marvel said, hauling the handcuffed demon over his shoulders like a very angry backpack.

“Oh, one more for the road!” 

Danny hit the demon with a final water gun shot. Hissing and scrunching their face like a cat, the demon tried to lunge at him. It wasn’t very successful. Weirdly non-verbal for a demon, who usually had to talk to make deals and steal mortal souls, but Danny wouldn’t judge. Might be a minor demon. A really basic imp? Who knew.

“Stop being a little bitch and you won’t get spray-bottled, asshole,” Danny chided.

With a loud laugh, Captain Marvel sped away.

#dp fanfic #dp fic #dp x dc #dp x dc fic #dp x dc fanfic #dp x dc crossover #if anyone wants to use this idea feel free lol #my writing

[itsravenbitch]

LMFAOO raven stop i literally had tears on my screen😂😂😂 just imagine me smiling with tears falling down my face and little sniffles💀anyway i’m better now so there shouldn’t be any typos.

okay so lemme tell you how dinner went. well actually before we get there lemme tell you how it was meeting my new family lol. so after i had finished getting ready i was too damn nervous to walk out i had to do some deep breaths. when i walked out my room and downstairs (also our house is different, i forgot to mention that cause that wasn’t really important to me in the moment) my sisters were out in the backyard taking pictures and stuff, while my two brothers and my dad were sitting on the couch just waiting since dudes get ready in 15 seconds no matter where they’re going LFMAO😭 and RAVEN tell me why my brother, the one i hugged while crying, gonna say ‘ah the random cry baby is ready’😂😂😂😂 it was not random he needs to stop lol he just don’t know. i told him to shut up and then i started to walk to my parents room to see my mom cause i knew she’d be in there still getting ready. everything was natural. that was one thing i was nervous about, whether or not it would be weird cause i didn’t know anyone. but i realized that they’re a product of MY consciousness, i made them lol so why wouldn’t i be familiar with them? 

now! the dinner. we went to pappadeaux (i got mozzarella cheese bites shit was so good) and the way there was genuine laughs and conversation flowing around the table was so refreshing. ugh it just feels so good and the great thing is, it feels just as good as it did in imagination. what i felt in my fulfilled imagination is EXACTLY how i feel now! i’m gonna have this stupid smile on my face for a minute 😭😭 i love my family, all of them. and that’s 7 words i couldn’t say for my old one. 

here’s the ask for this response

HOLD THE FUCK UP!! you went to PAPPADEAUX, a SEAFOOD restaurant, and ordered MOZZARELLA BITES??? you’re one of thoseee?? i should delete ts fr😭i’m appalled!

aside from that i’m weak ass hell cause yo brother really ain’t have to say that! like excuse me sir..? but at the same time i understand why he did🤣

i love that you mentioned the way you felt in imagination is exactly how you feel currently! that definitely speaks volume to the fact that imagination is powerful and literally creates reality!

and then men being ready in 15 seconds is very much so accurate lmao😂 then it’s just pressure to get ready before they start complaining

anyway i love love LOVED your story and feel free to send in more success stories <3

[lorcandidlucienwill]

Hi!! read some of the beaf that you had with some anons and honestly, i can kinda agree and kinda not agree.

(Let me first establish that I don't write lucien but if someone wants to diss him i will throw hands)

Okay, Azriel: Azriel's character and morals on a whole are questionable and not that great and a lot of shit that he's done especially with Elain is not...ugh just not it. Which is honestly why 70% of fanfiction I write is just ignoring canon or using his shitty character to create angst. He's hot, and the main reason I like him is because he's willing to risk his life for people he cares about. Does that excuse him from being biased and favouritism towards his brothers and Feyre? no. That's where delulu comes in and I erase that part of his character from my mind. So Azriel is the kind of character where since he does not exist I choose the parts of him I want to acknowledge and which parts I don't want to. Also, yeah, Elain should not be with him that dynamic is just...no.

Rhysand: I understand anti-rhysand just as much as I understand pro-rhysand. Both don't make sense to me, tbh i kinda ignored his existence his death did not affect me whatsoever and neither did his revival.

Cassian: He's...interesting. See I like the parts of his character where he's a goofy and funny dude but where it starts going downhill is he does his job with no questions asked and the way he treated Nesta is an ick. I'd like to be his bestfriend when it comes to his blatant sense of humour (not including when he pushed Nesta cause that's just plain messed up) but I would not want to be his lover. Not for a billion years.

In conclusion, get rid of Rhysand, teach Azriel and Cassian to have a backbone (or at least more of one), teach them how to have a guilty conscience, and also we need an Eris POV because I need to start justifying why I love Eris so much T^T My fics are honestly always reader leaves Azriel for Eris.

It's the Fae world. Everyone is "hot" so Azriel being "good looking" doesn't mean shit to me. If you mean his personality being hot? He has no personality aside from being delusional and crazy. Cassian I was cool with mostly until ACOSF. UGH I hate that SJM did that to Cassian because she wanted Nesta to wind up part of the Inner Circle. Rhysand? He's a dick in every sense of the word. The only way Cassian and Azriel could redeem themselves to me is if they destroyed Rhysand and his shoddy system, treat the Archerons right, and bow down to the king Lucien. For fuck's sake it's impossible to find a character who hasn't done Lucien dirty. Except maybe Tarquin or whatever. As for daddy Eris, this man could make Azzy PAY for how he treated Lulu. Lucien is too nice to do it himself. But Eris has no such qualms. Lucien and Eris together have too much power, that's why SJM hasn't had them made up yet 🔥🔥🔥 Anyway, the bat boys should just drop dread and Lucien should become High King. Eris can be his right hand man. Elain can be his High Queen and Nesta can be Eris's wife. Tamlin gets on his knees for Lucien who forgives him and adopts him as his pet dog. Feyre can go to therapy sessions with Thesan.

#i know this is probably not where you were going with this anon #but i love this #anon asks #lucien vanserra #eris vanserra #tamlin #feyre archeron #thesan #elain archeron #neris #elucien #anti rhysand #anti cassian #anti azriel #anti ic #anti inner circle

[katsune-nya]

Matsuno Chifuyu x Baji!Reader. D-drable?

Ok, listen, I have a WHOLE fic about Baji!Reader x Chifuyu on the WIPs, so, this is just... Um... Me kinda babbling about the lore behind it. (The fic is fem reader tho).

GN!Reader. SFW. Fix It Fic. Idiots In Love. Baji being y'all's number one fan.

• Ryoko used to go to the Sano Dojo, after she had you two she signed you into it as well.

• Kei and you grew up with Mikey, y'all were a pain in the ass for everyone around you, but grandpa Sano tolerated it since y'all were great students.

• Shin got scolded tripple by his grandpa, these three kids showed up every class and were so good at it and... There he was.

• Power Duo, y'all can kick ass tremendously.

• When Kei and Tora plan to steal a bike for Mikey you just... Tell them no. Plus, mfs, did you not know that's SHINICHIRO'S SHOP????

• Nothing happens, Shin's alive and Tora ok.

• You go to the same school, when Fuyu met Kei, helping him write the letter for Tora, you were on recess with your friends.

• Regardless, later on, since they were always together you ended up meeting him

• You couldn't lie... He was really cute.

• Fuyu's first reaction when meeting you was to be slightly intimidated ngl.

• You had grown up with Baji Fucking Keisuke and Baji Fucking Ryoko, you HAD to build a strong presence.

• Kei introduced you two and Fuyu was just "H-Hi, Baji-san... Baji-san 2? W-wait, no! That's not what I meant!"

• Poor boy.

• Friendship quickly blossomed!

• And a mutual crush, definitely.

• Keisuke knew from the beginning, in spite of him being fucking iliterate he's actually incredibly smart and perceptive.

• He tried to get y'all together so many times but all his plans failed.

• He even got the rest of Toman involved.

• Then, the whole Kisaki thing started.

• Kei and you knew the mf was suspicious asf.

• And him instead of working together with you and Fuyu decided to go to Valhalla for info and yeah...

• But! We have a new character! That actually has a relatively functional brain!

• Welcome, Baji Y/N, you are their only hope.

• While evetone was freaking out on different degrees you took it on your hands to encourage them.

Y/N: Everything will be ok. You can not stop it.

Y/N: Everything will be fine. You have no choice.

Chifuyu: What the fuck kind of pep talk is that?

Y/N: Ominous positivity.

• Kazutora aproves.

• Yeah, as I said, relatively functional brain.

• You joined the guys on the Valhalla brawl.

• If you're AFAB it was kinda hard to convince them 'cause "But you're a girl 🥺 you could get hurt, uwu." Mikey. (If you're FtM he wouldn't say girl, dw lmao, you're his dude bro but... Sigh...)

• In the end Draken doesn't wanna deal with you up their asses about it so he convinces Mikey, you're just as strong as Keisuke ffs.

• Yall win and Kei comes back.

Kei: A decision had to be made.

Y/N: And you fucked it up!

• He's so dumb for a smart person.

• You and Fuyu hang out more together.

• You two help Takemichi with his plans and you have better ideas than them so things go much better.

• Tora and Kei join you too.

• Blah Blah Blah, lore lore lore, y'all fix things, no one dies, ok? I won't go into detail for every issue, this is about my babyboy.

• All throughout this Fuyu and you keep getting closer and closer.

• Y'all hang out even when not necessary to save everyone.

• He doesn't even hang out with Kei on his own as much. You normally are there too.

Kei: *sneaking in through their window*

Y/N: *Turning in their chair and flicking the light on* You want to tell me where you've been all night?

Kei: I was with Chifuyu?

Chifuyu: *Turning in his chair* Wanna try again?

• You spend so much time together Toman thinks you're an item already.

• When Kei says you're not they are so... Ugh. Still?

Kei: *Sees Y/N and Chifuyu together*

Kei: They're cute. I would put them on a boat.

Kazutora: You mean... you ship them?

• Kei and Tora make all of Toman design an unnecessarily complex plan to get y'all to confess.

• Just for you two to show up holding hands????

• Turns out you got tired of it and just confessed to Fuyu in the park you normally go to.

• You planned a picnic together and gave him a home baked treat with a little note on it.

• He blushed so hard and between stutters and a bright smile accepted.

• Congratulations!

• They are so frustrated that they put so much work into things but honestly more relieved than anything.

• Your relationship is so cute.

• You're always together, go on arcade dates, cat cafés, park dates, saving everyone plans, home dates in which each one does their own thing.

• It takes five months for y'all to kiss.

• Was really sweet, really gay.

• Time Skip to highschool graduation.

• You two go together and at the end of the day Fuyu takes you on a ride around the city.

• Y'all might be young, but have been dating for around 5 years so Fuyu stops at the beach and stares at you.

• You tease him for it and he chuckles shyly.

• Then he asks if you would like to move out with him to the apartment he got with his job in a pet store.

• So now you live together!

• After some time, Chifuyu has his own store in which Tora and Kei work, with you going to visit him for lunch.

• You're 25 now, living together, 10 years dating...

• On your 10 year anniversary he finally pops the question.

• He took you to the park where you confessed, the both of you sitting on the swings.

• When you stayed quiet for a bit he suddently got on his knees.

• He had a whole speech but he just... Said what came out on the moment.

"Ever since we started dating I've known you were the one. I want to be with no one else but you. You make me the happiest I've ever been. Would you give me the honour of doing it for the rest of our lives?"

• When you get married, Keisuke walks you to the altar.

• When Fuyu sees you he instantly starts tearing up.

• Kei laughs and slaps him on the back.

• The wedding is short and romantic, Takemichi sobbing his eyes out.

• When you throw the bouquet Hina catches it!

• Everyone celebrates that so much.

• In the end, you have a beautiful marriage and a few cats.

Some incorrect quotes that encapsulate y'all's relationships.

Kei: Hey, wanna help me commit arson?

Y/N: What the hell!?

Kei: Oh, sorry, my bad.

Kei: *Whispering* Wanna help me commit arson?

Y/N: *Whispering* Of course. What do you need?

Y/N: This is a bad idea.

Kei: Then why are you coming along?

Y/N: Someone has to get your injured ass home.

Kei: I love you.

Y/N: *Zoning out* What?

Kei: I said I’m selling you to the zOo-

*To Chifuyu*

Kei: Thought I was meowing back at Peke J for the past hour, but it was just me and Y/N meowing at each other from different rooms in the house.

Kei: Are you busy?

Y/N: Yes.

Kei: Cool, listen to this...

Kei: I got an idea!

Y/N: Does it involve breaking the law?

Kei: By now don’t you think that’s a given?

Y/N: I was just trying to be optimistic.

Kei: Don’t bother.

*About the Baji siblings*

Mitsuya: Who's in charge there?

Chifuyu: Usually whoever yells the loudest.

Y/N: I told Kei that his ears turn red when he lies.

Chifuyu: Oh, they do?

Y/N: No.

Chifuyu: Then why did you tell him that?

Y/N: Because I can do this.

Y/N: Hey Kei! Do you love us?

Kei: *With his hands over his ears* No.

Chifuyu: What would Y/N think?

Kei: Ok, that’s an interesting thought, but hear me out: what if… we ran an experiment where we spent the rest of our lives finding out what happened if we never told them?

Chifuyu: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance?

Kei: No.

Y/N: No.

Chifuyu: Didn't think so.

Kei: Why don’t you go talk to them?

Chifuyu: *Sarcastically* Oh. Yeah, sure.

Baji: What? Just go tell Y/N they're cute, what’s the worst that could happen?

Chifuyu: They could hear me.

Y/N: Kill me nowwwww.

Kei: Sorry, no can do. I need your help with my homework.

Y/N: *Watching Chifuyu do something stupid* Keisuke, you're officially only the second highest risk here.

Kei: Hell yeah! I'm gonna-.

Y/N: Don't finish that sentence, you'll move back up.

#tokyo revengers fanfiction #tokyo revengers fic #chifuyu x you #chifuyu x y/n #chifuyu x reader #matsuno chifuyu x reader #chifuyu matsuno x reader #baji!reader #tokyo rev fanfic #tr fanfic #tokyorev fanfic #baji!reader x chifuyu

[thecluelessdoctor]

It's rambling time

*CRAWLS OUTTA WELL WITH A COMEDICALLY LARGE BACKPACK FULL OF NOTES*

I love totk. Don't get me wrong. I love it. But HOLY HELL TO I WANNA STRANGLE WHO EVER THOUGHT 'HEY MAN LETS GET RID OF ALL THE SHEIKAH TECH OTHER THAN LIKE- TWO GUARDIANS' LIKE EXSQUEEZE ME?? MY BABIESSSS/HJ

But on a serious note, I hate the fact how not only Zelda's character development go backwards, it forced a very black and white view on Hyrule. Rauru and kingdom of Hyrule good, Ganondorf bad. Like. What??? EXSQUEEZE ME.

Okz sure, Ganondorf did murder Sonia and steal a secret stone, and attack Hyrule, but like. Let's just- also note this. If the gerudo have a similar story to the sheikah, the kingdom of Hyrule, aka Rauru forced their hand into surrender.

Though I do like the 'keep your loved ones close and your enemies closer' trope (waiting for the ship art/j)

Let me note here, I am rather young, and Botw is what introduced me into LOZ. So. I still have a lot to learn. Anyway! On ward! (Also warning spoilers for TOTK jsndhdbdbdbd)

*sits down on a grassy patch, unpacking bag*

So!! Oh brother where to I start. Let's start with Zelda first because oh my hylia does it hurt.

Ok.

So, Zelda finds out about Zonai and the thing under Hyrule castle, it's understandable that she would be curious! It was established that she was a curious person.

Anyway, she gets yeeted into the past with a TIME power?!? WHAT. I mean it would explain why it took so long for her light power to wake the fuck up, but still?? It feels so random and forced.

Also in BOTW she spends one HUNDRED years keeping a calamity from destroying hyrule, and now suddenly she can't do jack in TOTK?!? EXSQUEEZE ME. WHAT. SHE MAKES A DAGGER GO BACK IN TIME. wOw- link mastered the power in a day- (I'm sorry but I have so many link rambles)

I just MY BRAIN HURTS. also I just- what the fuck happened to the sheikah?!

Yeah we are talking about this now. Like- fuckers are forgotten by EVERYONE- what happened to the shrines?! OR THE GIANT ASS DIVINE BEASTS LIKE WHERE ARE YOU RUDANA- *SOBS* Oh yeah and let's not forget the fact the champions have been forgotten basically. And Sidon moved the statue of his dead sister to make a statue of link riding him. Don't take that out of context. Also how the fuck did they get rid of the lynel up the mountain like?! Even if link killed it for them it would come back every time- endless building there made it so it couldn't come back there-??? Didn't know monsters had manners. I just- UGH.

Ah yes back to the sheikah tech. Everyone, even the sheikah have forgotten it like bruh. Even if it was like- 8 years since BOTW still- they couldn't have suddenly found everything and got rid of the shrines???

Like- the yiga clan (yes fucks I am talking about them) the yiga clan giving up learning about the sheikah for the Zonai makes sense- because the yiga clan has the depth now- and, they didn't have as much *known* access to sheikah tech. But like- PURAH FOR EXAMPLE- WHY WOULD SHE FORGET ABOUT THE TECH SKDNDJHR- IDC HOW HOT YOU ARE IM MAD AT YOU FOR THAT!

Oh and *SIGHS* lemme talk about the sages. No no, not the ones WE know now, I mean the ones of past. I hate them. The only one I like is the one of the gorons because of that one line he says

Me too buddy, me too/j

Anyway.

I wanna fucking murder these sages. Do they all share the same brain cell??? Other than you Mineru I like you.

Wait hold on that's meme potential. SOMEONE DRAW THE SAGES HAVING THE SAME BRAINCELL/HJ

But I just

I hate them.

So much.

Now let me talk about the best characters in TOTK. Besides kogha.

Farosh, Dinraal, and Naydra.

Dear golly I love these dragons. I vibe with them.

Now it's time for my personal favorite topic

THE YIGA CLAN

I love them. And. Yeah

Though I'm very sad about the missed potential for them. Also is it just me or is almost every yiga a dude..

Idk what to say. Just. I love them. And. Kogha better come back or I will cry/J he always comes back-(I'm sorry)

And the last topic of the evening

Link.

I have

Thoughts

Uhm

Ok less about link I love him but like the fact he's so chill about the fact he doesn't have a arm and now has the arm of a furry might say smt.

But at least in BOTW impa is like 'hey you sure your ready to take on what's next and save hyrule' but now it's like 'fucker go do this this and this and go look at the funny ass paintings on the ground' like. Damn ok. ;-;

I can't tell you how much I stalled playing totk. I had such a hard time finishing regional phenomenon. It just- wasn't fun. I knew what to expect, and what was going to happen. So. Yeah.

But I did really like Rito Village. And gorons town. They basically got addicted to drugs and I am ALL FOR IT (not drugs. Don't do drugs) but the Zora's felt... Boring. I mean they felt boring in botw but it got worse. Personally I thought the gerudo were the most boring in botw which is saying something because I got to sneak through the yiga hide out and Rob Kogha. But the zora felt- basic like. Yeah. At least everything else caused you damage or made things harder- the shroud made navigation hard, snow caused damage, the meat roast made conversion harder

But the zora? The sludge just- made you slower??? Idk man.

And omg. Do Sidon and yona make me mad. YEAH, HATE ME FOR IT SIDON FANS!! like people hate yona bc she's engaged to sidon. Personally I dislike them both. Like- Sidon lost the spark that made him- him! And yona- yona is just annoying. Like fuck off mipha copy.

And oh my hylia the MUCKDROCK- I hate it. No. No I loath it. Like what the fuck are you your fucking shrimp.

And it's fight wasn't even that hard. It was just annoying. Like- colagara in my opinion was the easiest, but it was super fun. But the muchdrock? He sucked.

Also btw- before the wrap up, has anyone found the smoldering coliseum and got zants helm??? Just me? Ok :') apparently it's the ice verison of the thunder helm. Now I think there is a fire one.. hmMmmm

Anyway! That wraps up the ramble!

#totk #tears of the kingdom #link #legend of zelda #zelink #totk link #zelda #loz totk #zelda totk #totk spoilers #botw link #loz botw #zelda botw #botw totk #the legend of zelda #botw #tloz #dotty rambles

[phantomphangphucker]

Phic Phight - How Not To Resurrect A Half Demon Lord

@lexiepiper @Ghostfox_fuyu

Being both an adventurer AND technically a monster wasn’t exactly the best mix to avoid fights, so it’s a good thing Danny actually LIKED fighting even if he couldn’t exactly ‘go hard’ against humans to avoid, you know, KILLING THEM. Other adventurers though? Yeah they didn’t exactly enjoy fighting what they thought was a weirdly powerful dungeon spawn.

Danny runs, skidding across the ground on his claws, the scrapping sound is loud but nowhere near the volume of the explosion happening right behind him. His tail nearly gets nicked! He’s not happy, not one bit. “WOULD YOU STOP THAT!”.

The mage with a frankly obscenely large hat damn near growls at him, which hey, growling was Danny’s thing. “Silence! Foul demon!”.

For fucks sake! Like yes, he gets that he looks like a demon. He gets that. But could people please just stop assuming that he belonged to whatever dungeon he and they happened to be in? This place was a goddamn lava dungeon, he was an ice demon with a black and white theme! Use your brain! Why would a fucking ice demon be in a lava dungeon!

Which, to be fair, him going into a lava dungeon wasn’t exactly smart or using his own brain; but Sam and Tuck thought this one would get them some sick ass gear so off they went. Of course they wound up getting separated, and of course Danny wound up running into other adventurers with the same idea as his party, and of course they mistook him for a dungeon beast. That’s his classic luck right there, everybody!

Ramming one set of claws into the wall and climbing up the hot rock as fast as he can, channeling some ice to his palms to avoid burning himself, it also was making some super cool-looking mist sizzle off of the rock so that was a neat bonus.

The adventurers trying to annihilate him seem to agree, the dude in black armour muttering to another mage with super orange hair, “hey if I equip ice gauntlets you think I could do that, it looks cool as Hell”. The mage whacks him over the head, ha!

Danny snorts to himself, jumping on to a ceiling stalactite of solid hot magma, ow ow ow ow ow, stupid ice core, stupid Tuck and Sam dragging him into a lava dungeon, stupid him for jumping onto solid magma, stupid stupid stupid. Ugh. But Danny does what Danny typically does when presented with pain, quips, shouting down, “why don’t you give up if you keep misting me!”. Ha! Good one, self. Ow.

The armoured guy chuckles, “I love it when monsters have a sense of humour, makes it so much more fun”, and hurls a goddamn spear at him. Nice, Danny can do spears and show off a little.

Danny launches himself down, grabbing the spear in between his teeth, fangs making it easy to keep the spear in there, and uses the spear head stabbing into the ground below to allow him to basically land going face down before gripping the shaft with his hands and spinning himself into an upright position. Him yanking it out of the ground and spinning it dramatically, grinning meanly, “oh I love free gifts, how’d you know it was my birthday?”, it’s totally not, he’s just being an asshole.

Big hat mage scowling at armoured guy quickly, “nice going, Salient”, then glaring back at Danny. Okay so armoured guy is named Salient, weird but okay. She shoots a fire last at Danny, Danny bats it away with the spear head snickering all the while. Then the other mage hits him with a holy-blast, because of course she does, and sends him into a wall.

He absolutely dropped the spear. Damn. He wanted to add that to his collection, which sure was definitely something he wasn’t doing before the whole resurrection gone wrong crap happened and he some how wound up getting his human souls wires crossed with Hell itself. A fuck up of hellish proportions.

Him shaking off the burn and sizzle from the holy power, at least still being kinda human and alive would stop that shit from outright smiting him, just burned and hurt like a motherfucker. The biggest annoyance his holy sensitivity usually caused him was not being able to use holy based healing potions… which were the cheapest kind aka the kind his party usually used to buy. Demonic based healing potions were the shit for him though, especially since he never had to worry about them debuffing or cursing him.

Orange hair mage huffs, “damn it, that didn’t do it”, scowling, “this place has some seriously strong demons, we might have use a hearth stone if it keeps up like this”.

Danny sticks his hands out to the side, tail twitching, “or maybe! Think a little and realise I’m not from this freaking dungeon!”.

“As if we’d believe a snake tongued demon!”.

Okay that’s just rude! It took him a very long time to learn how to talk with a forked tongue and he had to put up with a lot of mocking from Tuck! He sticks his tongue out at the group before having to climb up a wall again to avoid some thunder bolts from big hat mage and an arch of fire from Salient’s sword. At least he’d learned not to throw solid objects that Danny could grab, progress; progress for them and not him specifically. A very unfortunate specific.

Danny sending out a bit of icy flames that glowed black with his demonic energy to destroy another flame arch from Salient while moving sideways across the wall, he hates this dungeon it’s too fucking hot, goddamn. Zipping up to the ceiling and smacking his claws and palms on it, sending out a powerful wave of pure cold to force the ceiling to start snowing, which of course turns into very hot burning rain by the time it gets down to ground level. The party starts screaming and ducking for cover, that was surprisingly more effective than he expected and he absolutely had not intended to basically rain down boiling demonic water on them. Oops. He figured the snow would melt but not to the point of becoming boiling hot! How much energy was his core expending just to keep him fucking cool in this goddamn hellscape?!?

Danny skittering his way across the ceiling and in-between a gap between a stalactite and the dungeon ceiling, shouting a quick, “not trying to boil ya! Sorry!”. As he goes. Maybe they’ll be too busy hiding to realise where he’s tucked himself away. That would be nice, real nice.

“What kind of demon says sorry!”.

Don’t quip back, don’t quip back, don’t quip back. He’s trying to hide and quiping will fuck that up… “MY SORRY DEMONIC ASS!”, ah goddamn it, why does he do this to himself? Unsurprisingly the stalactite his hiding above gets fucking shot at by a holy bullet. That’s… that’s not great. Those sucked to get hit by and he’d one hundred percent need to be resurrected again if that shit hits his core enough times. But hey! Maybe that would un-demon him! Stupid plan, but hey! At least it is a plan! Plus that did not work when he accidentally fell into a pit of pure holy water. That had been the worst.

The stalactite gets shot at again, this time piercing through it and skimming his shoulder; him making his lip bleed by biting down to avoid yelping. Still hissing out a, “bloody hell”, though, because he could never just shut the fuck up could he? Also, he is officially panting, because it is too fucking hot here and his breath is making a bunch of mist aka giving away his spot more than his stupid quip did. Fuck him entirely.

He’s got three options:

One: start killing adventures like a proper full demon.

Two: overheat and pass out, possibly falling into hard ground or a pool of lava only to be descended upon by adventurers who would definitely hit unconscious him with a holy attack.

Three: leave his hiding spot and start looking for cooler areas while avoiding getting hit or doing any major hitting.

Four: use a hearth stone to teleport out of the dungeon, seems like the obvious choice right? Except when Danny’s half demon ass did that he wound up in Hell every time and Sam and Tuck would have to go through the hassle of getting him back out of there. That crap always resulted in them having to track down yet another ice dungeon and use forbidden demon summoning magic. Meanwhile he’d go throwing hands with demons for however long it took his friends to get him. Not ideal.

Then it turns out that there’s actually a fifth option, a wall blowing up and sending his bullet hole riddled stalactite crashing down towards the ground and exploding in hot semi solid magma. OW! Danny sputtering and shaking himself off aggressively, “oh fuck! Bloody hell! Me damn fuck it! Stupid fucking lava dungeon! Stupid fucking adventurers! Where’s my teammates when I me damn need them!”.

“Shit since when do goddamn demons team up! We need to hurry this up!”.

Then there’s a very loud thump, Danny squinting his fucking burning eyes up at the noise, fuck yeah! It’s Tuck! Nice! The guy’s landed directly on top of the orange haired mage, pointing his fricken lightning cross bow right in her face. The Salient guy getting hurled into a wall by vines seconds later, and a few more seconds and said vines are on fire and brunt to a crisp.

The big hat mage jumping back from the newbies assaulting her group, “great, how many different kinds of demonic vermin does this dungeon have!”, her creating an explosion with electricity to make something of a smoke screen for her to grab Salient out of the hole in the wall the guy made.

But! BUT! That puts their backs to Danny, and Danny might object to killing people but he did not object to bruising them up some. Meaning he launches himself at them, grabbing the back of both of their necks, and slams them into the ground; using his tail to tie their ankles all together. He also grabs the hat mages hat with his teeth and eats the fucking thing as a probably insane looking show of superiority.

Tuck, not looking at Danny and still staring violently down at orange hair mage, “you good, Danny-man?”.

Danny growling, “I’m annoyed, burnt, and vaguely considered making y'all haul me outta hell again for dragging me to this shit ass place”.

Sam walking calmly through the destroyed wall and into where they all are, “honestly I hate this place too. My plant magic is completely useless and I wrecked my helm”.

Danny snorting, “ha! Serves you right!”, he gets elbowed in the chin by Salient for being distracted. But well, an elbow, even armoured, isn’t gonna do much to Danny, so he just growls down at the man while said elbow is being pressed up into his chin.

Tuck snorts at the scene, “I’d stop that, Danny’s an obsidian rank combat warrior”. The mage beneath him scowling, “that is a demon spawn or are you fucking blind?”.

Danny takes offence to that, demon wise he was on par with a demon lord! Not a freaking basic hell spawn! “Excuse you!”. But Tuck laughs at Danny’s expense, “that’s what you get for never fighting back, moron”. Danny sticks his tongue out at the guy.

Sam shaking her head as she walks over to Danny, “seriously, if they attacked you first who cares if you hurt them”, grabbing the unconscious ex-hat mage out from Danny’s grasp, shit he hadn’t actually realized he’d knocked her out. Whoops. Sam pointing a finger at Salient, whose elbow is still pressed into Danny’s chin, “you wouldn’t be holding your own for shit if Danny took you seriously”.

“Pfft, I could take him”.

The orange hair mage snapping, “are you serious right now?! You are literally being pinned down you idiot!”.

Danny nodding, “glad we’re on the same page on that”; rolling his shoulders as he can feel some of the burning healing itself, he’d be healing a hell of a lot faster if he wasn’t in this damn hot lava dungeon though.

Tuck rolling his eyes before staring down at the orange hair mage, “look. Danny’s an adventure, he literally has a license on him right now. The only reason he’s in this dungeon is ‘cause we heard there was some bomb ass equipment in here, same as you guys probably”.

Sam laughing a bit meanly as she gives the ex-gay mage a healing potion since Danny probably gave her a concussion, “Danny’s not a ‘hell spawn’ he’s a fucked up resurrection spell gone wrong”.

Salient snorting, “prove it! And how the Hell did that happen?”. Danny snickers, “hell happened”; Tuck moving his crossbow out of orange hair mages face specifically to shoot Danny with it.

“Ow! You jerk!”.

Unfortunately orange hair takes that opportunity to blast Tuck nearly point blank in the stomach with a holy blast, sending him smashing up into the ceiling. Oh Hell fucking no, attacking Danny was one thing, he was a demon-looking mother fucker and could take hits like a champ; attacking his friends was a whole ass nother matter. At least Sam catches Tuck with some vines as he starts falling down from the ceiling and Tuck wasn’t knocked out by the attack.

Still though. Danny is none too impressed. And he refuses to tolerate a repeat of that, so just as the orange haired friend hurting asshat gets herself up off of the ground Danny lets himself loose more than a little bit. Limbs extending, spines pulling up out of his upper back and shoulders, second set of kudu horns extending out, ribs cracking and expanding through and over his torso skin to settle into a bigger form, that stupid gharial crocodile skull boiling and forming out of and off of his head; him all but shoving orange hair back into the ground and pinning her there with a single hand. Slamming the other hand down near her face, using a foot to keep the Salient guy pinned. Danny snarling, snout opening right over the mages face, “shoot at me all you want but you don’t get to hurt what’s mine”.

Tuck’s shaking off all that holy power, grumbling about stupid trigger happy adventurers as if he wasn’t one himself and stomps over to fucking shoot orange hair in the face with some sand; her unable to do anything about it because of Danny.

Salient muttering, “holy fucking shit, goddamn”. While Sam stops over to him, Sam smacking Danny’s ankle, “give over your license, you demonic horror”. Danny huffing out an icy breath in orange hairs face, moving his tail to use the many little quill hair spines on it to grab out his license from his torso inside his ribs, slipping it into her hands, “thank you”, she shoves the license in the probable warriors face, “see? Adventurer. You really think Clementine would approve him without goddamn checking him and his bullshit out?”.

He grunts from under Danny’s foot, “fair ‘nough. You tryin’ to crush me here?”.

Danny huffing another icy breath, “maybe”. Sam smacks his ankle again so Danny, with a shrug, lifts up his foot and lets the guy up. Danny thinks some mild crushing is totally deserved in this case, even if that was maybe influenced by these guys hurting his friends and making him feel all possessive and shit. Demon crap could be so annoying; being in this hot ass place only making it more annoying.

Salient rolls over and sits up, rolling his shoulders, “ow yeah, definitely not a spawn, damn”, eyeing himself over, “aw man, you cracked my shoulder pad. License doesn’t look fake though so”, looking up at Danny, “bad ass ability though”.

Danny tilts his skull head at the guy before looking back down to orange hair, “you gonna keep trying to annihilate me?”.

“You’re a demon”.

“And?”, lifting the hand that isn’t pinning her and waving it around dismissively, “it’s only a by half thing anyway”.

Tuck chuckling down at her, “need I point out that Danny could absolutely just crush you right now? Yeah, okay, so he’s sorta a demon, and sorta dead and not dead, but he’s not confined to a dungeon or Hell and he’s an adventurer. adventurers run into weird shit all the time, it’s not his fault he is the weird shit”. The girl glares but sighs, clearly giving up, so Danny basically forces himself to compact, puffing icy steam everywhere. Tuck grinning, “so dramatic”.

Danny pointing a normal standard human length clawed finger in the guys face, “hey, if there’s one thing I do well, besides confusing people and myself, it is dramatics”; if he was gonna be stuck as some weird dead but not dead, from the afterlife Hell but not from Hell, then he can be an overdramatic asshole about it.

Orange hair gets up immediately and moves over to the still unconscious ex-hat mage, muttering, “good, they didn’t poison her or anything. Damn demon worshipers”. Oh for fucks sake, was it really that hard to understand that he was a good guy and just a weird but typical adventurer? Ugh. Plus! He’s definitely a higher rank than her, so rude.

Salient standing up and shaking himself off, shouting at his teammate, “Lily good?”; nice, Danny’s got another name.

Orange hair sighs, “yeah. They didn’t do anything to her besides knock her out”. Oh everyone’s a critic.

Danny rolling his eyes and huffing, “you say that like you guys weren’t trying to fucking destroy me. Again, you gonna keep doing that shit? ‘Cause I’m positive all three of us outrank you guys, we just don’t exactly want to start having to fucking kill people just because people keep thinking I’m a me damned dungeon monster”.

Sam shaking her head and moving to be over by Tuck and Danny, “at least they didn’t think you were the dungeon boss this time”.

“Oh Hell that had been such a pain”.

Salient chuckles and looks at him, “you make a lot of ‘Hell’ comments and shit”.

Danny shrugging with a smirk, “hey if I’ve gotta be slightly, vaguely, hell bound then I might as well take the piss outta it”.

Orange hair glaring at Salient, “seriously? You’re making friendly with it now?”.

Danny pouts, “hey, rude much”. While Sam and Tuck laugh at him meanly.

Salient shoves her, “chill, aren’t adventurers supposed to at least try to get along. At least he’s not another psycho paladin who's just using his god as an excuse to commit way too much murder”.

Danny’s entire little party nodding, “yeah fuck paladins”. Earning them a scowl from orange hair, “we all know why you demon-lovers wouldn’t like paladins”.

Then Lily groans a little, sitting up and holding her head, “well at least I’m alive”.

Danny snorting, “yeah I have a thing against committing murder”.

“That is the strangest thing I’ve ever heard a demon say”.

Danny pouts at her. He gets that demons have a terrible rap, an earned terrible rap, but cut a guy some slack will ya? It would be so nice if he could shapeshift to look fully human, he bets that in some other universe he definitely could and he is jealous of that version of him. Stupid fucker probably got all the super sneaky useful abilities. Like being able to turn invisible or something, that would have been so useful today. Ugh.

Lily looking to her party members, “so care to explain what’s going on here?”.

“Demon dude is a legit adventurer, licensed and everything”.

Orange hair just grumbles incomprehensibly.

Sam crossing her arms at the three, “I’m Sam, platinum rank herbalist and green mage. The one with the crossbow is Tucker, silver rank earth mage and gear smith. And the half demon, that you are to stop attacking, is Danny, obsidian rank combat warrior as already mentioned; he’s also a weapons smith and death magic apprentice. Yes he’s a resurrection spell gone wrong, he did it to himself somehow, but people screw up spells all the time so whatever”.

Danny shrugging, “I mean, typically they don’t screw up so impressively they fuck up half their genetic species but yeah”; Sam swats him one, expertly avoiding the horns.

Salient snorts, “you’re a death magic apprentice and you made your self half dead? WOW you suck”.

“Hey!”, Danny puts a hand to his chest, “technically it’s useful, this way I can actually go to one of the death planes now without slowly dying”.

Lily shakes her head disbelievingly, “ridiculous and inane”, gesturing at herself, “Lily, steel rank lightning high mage”, gesturing at Salient, “Salient, silver rank knight”, gesturing at orange hair, “Gemine, iron rank white mage and apprentice priestess”. Tilting her head, “why is an obsidian with a platinum and a silver? He’s three and four ranks above you two respectively?”.

Danny waves her off immediately, “eh, I was gold before the demon shit fucked my shit up. And I am the leader so it’s not that odd”. Sam nodding, “if anything it’s weirder that an iron is travelling with a silver”.

Gemine scowling, muttering to herself, “of course the demon is the leader, disgusting”. Lily cuffs her over the head, making the girl pout. Lily nodding, “demons are more powerful than the living so I suppose that is logical, and a lower rank priestess will best any higher rank warrior”, glancing around, “where’s my hat?”.

Sam and Tuck stare at Danny judgingly, him rubbing his neck, “I ate it?”; it was a heat of the moment thing okay! He makes really dumb decision when he’s put on the spot!

Salient nodding with a smirk, “yeah, it was pretty weird”.

Danny pouting, “I’m not paying you back for it”, twitching, “and can we get the fuck out of this hot ass place already?”, looking at Sam and Tuck, “if you found nothing good I’m gonna be so annoyed”. Sam rolling her eyes and digging in her bag, pulling out a little unassigned demon core. Yum! Him brightening up immediately, “oh nice! This was so worth getting shot by holy bullets!”.

“Danny!”.

“Dude what!”.

Danny grabbing the core and biting into it, much to the disgust of his unwitting onlookers, “eh it was just a shoulder nick and I am literally covered in lava and holy light burns so that’s kinda not what I’m focused on”. Basically dumping the demonic energy down his gullet with a happy purr.

Salient pulling a face, “wow that is disgusting, awesome”. Lily sighs tiredly before gesturing at Danny’s party, “so are we good to just go our separate ways?”. Danny’s down for that, his burns were healing much better now even if he was still hot as hell.

Sam crossing her arms, “depends on if you’re going to keep harassing Danny”; Danny’s just content to lick his chops in demonic satisfaction. Gemine pouting, “I won’t be able to vanquish him so fine, I won’t”.

Danny giving her a thumbs up, “that’s the spirit, now let’s get the hell outta this furnace before my core decides I deserve to over heat”. Sam and Tuck roll their eyes at him and laugh, Tuck patting his shoulder as they all turn to wander off to the exit. The other party of adventurers awkwardly heading deeper into the dungeon.

Danny stretching a little, going all demon always made him feel like his bones were all fucked up and needed a stretching, “so find anything else?”.

“Lightning bolt in a bottle”.

“Bone dagger. Lots of bone daggers”.

“Oh and a whole ass dragon hide, it’s in the dimensional pocket”.

“We did put all the random gem stones in there too right”.

“Uh…”.

“Damn it, Tucker”.

Danny laughs to himself, shaking his head. This day was some bullshit but at least they didn’t leave empty handed, and wasn’t finding treasure and getting to throw fist-a-cuffs the whole point of being an adventurer? Even if he’d rather be beating up dungeon monsters than constantly having to duke it out with other adventurers.

---

Of course they don’t even make it a full day before running into the very same party. At least this time they’re at the adventurers guild so there’s no way he’s gonna get attacked again.

Gemine blinking at Danny, “so you actually can leave the dungeon”.

Danny rolling his eyes, “yeah it’s almost like I was telling the truth or something”. Hell, he seldom lied about shit, people just thought it was all too ridiculous to be true.

Lily looks to the desk lady, quirking an eyebrow then gesturing at the demon in the room. Juhe blinking and smiling, understanding quickly, “yes the demon is welcome here, yes he’s an adventurer, no you’re not allowed to vanquish him, and no he’s not mind controlling anyone”.

Salient chuckles, putting a hand on his hip, “wow it sounds like this happens a lot”. Tuck shaking his head, “you have no idea”; before Sam goes up to make their report to the guild master. Technically Danny’s supposed to do that, being the leader and all, but head office had a barrier around it and they refused to take it down just for Danny’s sorry ass, meaning compromises were made.

Danny nodding at the guy, “anytime we go into a dungeon and run into a party that hasn’t met me before, it turns into a fight”, rubbing his neck, “which has earned me the title of adventurers bane since I keep basically having to beat down adventurers until they give up”.

Juhe nodding, “and he helps out the enforcers sometimes, since he can be quite the intimidating presence”.

“Boo, having a demonic aura isn’t my fault, and if just a simple demonic aura is enough to scare someone they probably shouldn’t be an adventurer”.

“You forget most adventurers do gathering quests and less dangerous dungeons”.

“Pah!”.

“You also forget that your demonic aura is that of a demon lord not a simple spawn or lesser demon”.

Danny’s only response to that is a pout.

Lily had been about to go up and make her own report, one foot stopping in midair, “that one is… a demon lord?”, and looks very concerned at Danny. While Salient grins to himself, “sweet, I got to fight a demon lord. Man that’s cool”.

Danny blinks, shrugging, “I was a wee bit miffed about suddenly being very literally in hell one time, not the time I fucked my resurrection up, and went demon killing happy. Two might have been demon lords and one was definitely a death god”.

All three look at him in shock, horror, or looking just plan impressed in Salient’s case. Lily shaking her head, “alright, you very well could have annihilated us”.

Johe glancing at some paperwork, “you three are silver, steel, and iron? Yes, you would not have stood a chance if taken seriously by him. He’s officially listed as obsidian, but he’s closer to iridium, which still stands as our highest class”.

Danny blushing, “aw shucks”.

“Don’t you ‘aw shucks’ me, if you’re that flattered then stop leaving your tail quills in the lobby wall”.

“Hey! It has a mind of its own”.

“It’s still attached to you, ain’t it?”.

Danny pouts at her, tail twitching near the ground, he’s half tempted to stab the wall with it just to be petty. He did petty very very well after all.

Lily shakes herself before finally going up to give her report; Danny absolutely hearing Sam whisper a threat at her, “Danny’s a lot nicer than the rest of us, don’t pull that shit with him again or else I won’t hesitate using a mind vine to make you break your party members”, as they pass in the stairway. He makes a point to roll his eyes disappointedly at her when she makes it down fully.

His friends were great but so over protective and possessive of him, it was nice but also a pain. She rolls her eyes right back at him as the three of them head out, waving bye to Salient and Gamine as more of a form of pleasantries than genuine fond fair-wells or whatever. They ain’t friends and weren’t gonna suddenly become them, something Danny was frankly fully uninterested in. He had his Sam and Tuck and was definitely not interested in sharing them.

End.

Prompts: Fantasy/rpg setting. Danny died, but the resurrection spell went wrong, and now he’s trapped as something not quite dead but not fully alive either. Not that he’d ever let that stop him from becoming an adventurer, even if he does get mistaken as a resident dungeon monster by other adventuring parties every now and then… Demon!au

#danny phantom #phandom #phic phight #danny fenton #tucker foley #sam manson #my writing #have a fic suck my dick #phantomphangphucker #phicphight24 #phic phight 24 #gothmoth #demon!au #rpg!au #fantasy!au #op danny #bamf danny

[happi-tree]

i hate accidents (except when we went from friends to this)

“Oh, god, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you, I don’t know what came over me, you’re just so hurt and I was so scared and I didn’t know what to do and -”

Link cuts himself off as he glances up from Taylor’s still-glazed expression to his forehead. Before his eyes, the gash stitches itself closed, the open wound fading to a pink scar that pales to white before disappearing entirely.

Lincoln remembers hearing the words “kiss it better” throughout his entire childhood. He remembers the way his dads would patch up his scraped knees with ointment and a bandage and top it all off with a tiny kiss before treating him to a hard candy from their first aid kit for being such a good boy.

Never once had Link thought that the phrase could be literal. Or that his newfound powers could make it literal.

Or: Link discovers a rather unorthodox way of using Lay On Hands thanks to one Taylor Swift, and for some reason, he can’t seem to stop finding excuses to perfect his new skills. Fortunately, Taylor is more than happy to help.

once / twice / thrice, pt. 1 / thrice, pt. 2

twice (‘cause it’s gonna be alright)

The second time it happens, it’s not an accident. 

Taylor invited Link to his house on the pretense of doing homework together (who knew saving the world meant having so many late assignments?) and maybe watching some anime later. 

It had taken Link some convincing at first, but Taylor thinks he’s finally got him hooked on Blue Lock: Keyed Up!!! (which is good, considering it’s the only soccer anime that Taylor’s watched). 

Unfortunately, though, homework comes first. Which sucks, because there are about a million and one better things that a protagonist like him could be doing, but he doesn’t want to worry his mom about his grades slipping any further.

Plus, Taylor missed an additional afternoon’s worth of classes yesterday for a long-overdue orthodontist appointment (his jaw aches at the reminder), so he has extra extra make-up work. Ugh. 

At least Link’s passable at science. Normally, Scary could make up some pretty good answers for all of them for their English work, but she’s out recording some stuff for Erica’s podcast. Normal has cheer practice, so Taylor doesn’t really have much hope for his pile of Spanish worksheets, but at the very least, he and Link are making progress. 

Very slow progress. 

Taylor accidentally clenches his jaw a little too hard, and the ache in his teeth intensifies from there-but-tolerable to fucking-hell-it-feels-like-someone-is-wrenching-my-upper-jaw-in-two-holy-shit.

He makes a quiet, whimpering sort of noise, and Link looks up from his work immediately, eyebrows all scrunched together and lips downturned in concern. It would be cute if Taylor could focus on anything other than the agony plaguing his mouth.

“You okay, dude?” he asks, shifting closer on Taylor’s king-size mattress.

“Nnnnnnn,” Taylor moans, shaking his head ever so slightly and flopping back against the pillows dramatically (but carefully, so as not to accidentally make the pain worse somehow). “Teeth hurt.”

“Oh, right, you got your braces adjusted yesterday,” Link gently moves their notebooks and laptops to the side, where they won’t get crushed. 

Taylor’s eyes squeeze shut as he tries to do anything but focus on the ache. “Mmm,” he confirms. “And I think maybe my fangs might be growing in? Hard to tell, but I keep accidentally cutting my tongue on my canines, so I think they’re getting sharper.”

“That’s pretty cool,” Link says, and the sincerity in his voice brings a smile to Taylor’s face, which he cuts off with a wince because fuck, ow, that hurt.

“Would be cooler if my entire mouth didn’t hurt like hell, though,” Taylor grumbles. 

He opens his eyes to find Link hovering over him, looking worried and… hesitant?

“Jeez, Link, I’m not dying or anything. The torment is endless and the agony neverending, but I will persevere! Ah, fuck,” Taylor mutters, pressing a hand to his cheek, which only seems to make matters worse.

Link’s still looking at him like that, though, so he makes grabby hands to beckon him closer.

“Cuddles would maybe help, though, if you’re just gonna sit there,” he offers.

“I can work with that,” Link says, laughing a little under his breath and leaning back on the pillows beside him. 

He opens up his arms and Taylor wedges himself between them, tucking his head under Link’s chin and burying the top portion of his face into his chest, right below his collarbones. He inhales, trying to focus on the smell of laundry detergent and fresh-cut grass and sports deodorant and sweat and something uniquely Link rather than the pain in his jaw, and it works a little.

Link’s arms come around to encircle him, and while Taylor can feel stifled by skin-to-skin contact (he already has enough trouble regulating his own body heat without throwing someone else’s into the mix), the way Link holds him feels… nice. Protective. Link begins to trace tiny, meaningless circles into his back with his thumbs through the fabric of Taylor’s shirt, and the sensation grounds him. 

Taylor quietly realizes that he hasn’t felt this safe in a long time. 

His mouth still hurts like a bitch, though.

As if on cue, another pulse of pain floods his mouth, and Taylor instinctively clenches his jaw against the feeling, which in hindsight was pretty stupid because it makes the ache intensify tenfold. Taylor lets out a whine into Link’s chest, clutching helplessly at his best friend’s shirt. 

He fantasizes somewhat deliriously about taking his teeth and chucking them out of his face where they can’t hurt him.

“That seems like it must be pretty painful,” Link says sadly.

“Nnnnnnnngh,” Taylor replies because yeah, no shit, Sherlock-kun.

“You know,” Link starts out, tone still soft but much more considering, more nervous. Taylor can feel the vibration of Link’s voice against the top of his head, right where it’s pressed against his taller friend’s throat. “I think I can fix that, if you want.”

Taylor pulls away a bit, and Link loosens his hold to allow for some space.

“Well, why didn’t you say so earlier?” Taylor asks. “I know I look totally awesome and composed on the outside, but I am fucking perishing inside. Yes, please, whatever your idea is, I will literally do anything. What were you thinking of, though?”

“Well,” Link says, voice pitching high, “I was thinking, I could, uh. Kiss it better? Like I did last week, if you remember that?” He looks briefly down at Taylor, as he says this, scanning his face for… something. “Oh my god, it would be so embarrassing if you didn’t remember that. Never mind, this is so stupid, sorry, forget I said anything.”

Except Taylor doesn’t really hear that last part because he’s too busy reliving the feeling of Link’s chapped lips pressed against his temple, callused hands cradling the back of his head, big brown eyes that look like black holes in the darkness of sun-off threatening to swallow Taylor completely. 

Does Taylor remember last week? That’s like asking someone if they remember that the sky is red. Taylor remembers last week annoyingly well, and he keeps remembering it, and the scene plays and replays as the hellfire within his ribcage flares and the heat rises and he looks up at Link who’s still working himself into some anxiety-ridden ramble and -

Cool it, cool it, part of his mind whispers to him. 

Link offered to kiss me, an irritatingly large amount of his brain shrieks back at him, uncool and uncharacteristically nervous and taking up more mental real estate by the second. Boy hugging me boy touching me boy kissing me?

You just need to calm down, the more rational part of his brain assuages. You’re Taylor Swift, you’ve got this.

I’m Taylor Swift, I’ve got this. Taylor mentally chants, strongarming the fire in his chest and turning the flame down to something a bit more bearable. I’ve got this. I’m popular, I’m icy cool, and anyone would be lucky to kiss me. I’ve got this.

Brain successfully rebooted, Taylor nudges at Link’s shoulder, stopping his friend’s mutterings in their tracks.

“As long as you haven’t talked yourself out of it, I’m, like, totally down if you’re still offering. You severely underestimate how desperate I am for pain relief.”

“Oh,” Link says, eyebrows drawn up in surprise. Then, “Really?”

“Yeah, oh,” Taylor echoes back. “Really. The only thing is… don’t you usually have to touch whatever’s hurt for it to work? And like, it’s my teeth, so…”

“Yeah, and?” Link prompts, like he isn’t quite seeing any problem with that and.

Oh.

Oh, Link means kissing kissing. Like, on the mouth. And to get at Taylor’s teeth… that’s like making-out-kissing. Oh, god. Oh my god, okay. This is fine. Sure! Great.

“Oh,” Taylor says aloud. Then, “Okay!”

“Are you sure? About this?” Link questions, searching Taylor’s expression even as he places a slightly-clammy hand to Taylor’s cheek, even as Taylor’s face feels like it lights on fire in response. The clear concern in the upturn of his brows and the gleam in his dark eyes has Taylor humming in assent before he realizes what he’s doing and placing his hand atop Link’s larger one, holding him there as Taylor’s gaze is drawn to his slightly parted lips.

“For the love of god, Link, just kiss me already.”

“Okay,” Lincoln says, quiet and slightly unsteady. And he closes the gap.

It’s clear that this is Link’s first kiss, and Taylor’s pretty sure Link can tell that it’s the first time he’s kissed someone, too (well, someone that isn’t his body pillows).

Link’s lips feel softer against Taylor’s than they had against his forehead. He’s tentative and shy and exceedingly gentle, and Taylor’s unsure if that’s out of the fear of causing him undue pain or if it’s just who Link is, but he appreciates it either way.

 Link’s thumb strokes delicately across Taylor’s cheek, almost reverently, like he’s afraid that Taylor will break apart in his arms if he doesn’t treat him with care. Link’s other hand comes to rest at the side of his neck, threading through the hair that’s escaped Taylor’s topknot, and the feeling of it paired with the light press of Link’s lips against his own draws another humming sound from his throat.

Taylor tries his best to reciprocate, mouth pliant against Link’s, free hand fisting in the soft, slippery fabric of his best friend’s shirt and tugging gently as if to bring him in even closer. His other hand moves from atop Link’s to cradle the back of his head and run his fingers through his close-cropped hair.

Link makes a low, soft sort of noise that will no doubt be replaying for weeks on end in Taylor’s head. God, he needs to hear that sound again.

Sadly, though, they’ve run out of air, and Lincoln pulls away only to lean back in and carefully rest his forehead against Taylor’s.

Taylor’s eyelids blink open (oh, he had closed them, when had that happened?) and he comes face-to-face with Link, brown eyes deep and dark, half-lidded and half-dazed, staring directly at him with open affection. His hand still rests on Taylor’s cheek, and Taylor can feel the stark temperature difference there, anxiety-chilled and demonically-overheated, as something flutters hard in his chest.

“Uh, wow,” Link says, quiet and very breathless, and God, who gave him the right to be so beautiful and so adorable at the same time?

Taylor draws his lip in between his teeth and is greeted with a sharp stab of pain.

“Ow, fuck, shit,” Taylor hisses, scooching back to put more distance between the two of them. “Guess that didn’t work, but thanks for trying, Link. You out of spell slots or something?”

With Link’s complexion, it can be difficult to tell when his friend is flushed or flustered, but his wide eyes and cringing expression definitely come across as embarrassed.

“No,” he replies, voice a few octaves higher than normal. “I, uh, forgot? To do the spell.”

At Taylor’s quirked eyebrow, Link elaborates, “I just wanted to make sure I didn’t accidentally hurt you more, and then I got so wrapped up in that that I guess I forgot, and then you did that thing with your hand in my hair, and -” he cuts himself off with a whine, covering his eyes with a hand and dramatically rolling over, the picture of mortification. “Kill me now.”

Taylor laughs, loud and sudden and sharp despite the pain, and Lincoln curls a little further into himself. 

“I can just, uh - I made it weird, I can just go, I guess?” Link says in that reedy, nervous way of his, voice cracking toward the end as he sits up, moves to stand -

“Dude,” Taylor clambers across the mattress after him, grabs his wrist. “Where the hell do you think you’re going?”

“I-“ Link gestures with his thumb toward the door. “Home? I mean, I screwed up, and you laughed, and now you probably think I’m so stupid and-“

“Hold up, handsome,” where did that pet name come from - “I wasn’t laughing at you- I mean! I was,” Taylor watches as Link’s expression droops further “- but not to make fun of you! It’s just…” Come on, just say it, you’ve never had trouble speaking your mind before - “endearing.”

Link looks more confused and anxious than anything, but that’s better than sad and anxious, so Taylor takes that as a win. 

“Plus, you’re not getting away from me that easy, Li-Wilson,” He adds, tugging his friend a little closer. Link doesn’t resist it.

Taylor allows a smile to pull at his lips, only flinching a little bit at the pain he now expects. “You can try again, you know,” he offers, looking up at Link through his lashes. 

“I can?” His friend asks, skin flushed darker across his cheeks. “I didn’t make it too awkward?”

“Nope!” Taylor responds, popping the “p.” 

“Nothing awkward about a good old-fashioned makeout session with your best friend!”

“Best friend,” Link echoes, “Right…”

“C’mon,” Taylor goads, crooking a finger toward him as he smirks. “I don’t bite.”

Taylor’s gaze lowers from Link’s face and rests at the side of his friend’s neck, taking note of the sparse freckles there. His teeth feel a little heavier in his mouth.

“Not unless you want me to,” he murmurs. 

“What?” Link asks, sounding strangled. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Taylor evades.

“If you’re really sure -“

“I am,” Taylor confirms, moving to sit half-gracelessly in his friend’s lap, hands steadying his weight on Link’s strong shoulders. “Now, less tally-talky, more smoochy-smoochy!”

“So demanding,” Link teases, even as he threads his fingers through his hair again. Taylor can hear the smile in his voice without having to look - which is good, because if he did, he’s pretty sure he’d give into the impulse to kiss the curve of his lips without preamble.

“You bet.” Taylor’s voice comes out much breathier than he expects as he meets Link’s eyes. “Don’t forget the spell this time!”

“I won’t! Probably.” 

Just like before, Link leans in again, and a slight smile pulls at Taylor’s lips as he meets him halfway. 

The sensation of Link’s lips against his own is a little less foreign now, a little less startling. Taylor lets himself melt into it, and just before he closes his eyes he can see the adorable little furrow of concentration between Link’s brows that he gets whenever he’s casting something. 

Kissing his best friend tastes like vanilla chapstick and Taylor’s favorite soda. Link had snagged a bottle of lychee Ramune out of his hands earlier, saying something about how carbonation was bad for braces and offering his homemade sports drink instead (which hadn’t tasted too great but wasn’t quite as bad as Taylor had expected). Taylor finds that he doesn’t really mind, now - not when the flavor is even more addictive this way.

Link’s hands come up to cradle the sides of Taylor’s face like some sort of fairytale prince, firm and gentle and insistent all at once. The soft pressure of his friend’s fingertips ghosts along the jut of his jawline, and it’s almost worshipful, like Link sees Taylor as someone to be adored. 

The tenderness of it all sends a thrill down Taylor’s spine, and then the chill spreads, unfurling itself through every nerve. 

Taylor has been on the receiving end of Link’s magic before, but he’s rarely lucid enough to appreciate it, to bask in the comforting coolness his friend’s Lay On Hands brings. It’s less like running an open cut under cold water and more like a fresh breeze in the middle of a stagnant summer afternoon, he thinks, something blissful and relieving that reminds him of safety, just like the boy he’s kissing. He falls forward into the embrace - both the spell and Link’s affection - as his hands tangle themselves in the back of Link’s athletic shirt, chasing the feeling. Link’s magic is a deeply soothing sensation, a balm to Taylor’s flushed cheeks and fire-bright nerves and burning heart, and he can feel himself melt in Link’s hold, his thoughts reducing to little more than a warm haze against his lips.

Link pulls away after what probably amounted to only a few moments, and Taylor leans after him on instinct. His eyes flutter open just in time to see Link gazing down at him fondly through his lashes, the last dregs of his magic sparking across his irises in anvil-sharp flashes of bronze before fizzling out entirely. His lips are slightly kiss-bruised, and it sends a jolt of satisfaction through Taylor’s stomach as he realizes that he did that.

“Did it work this time?” Link asks him, still cradling Taylor’s face in his hands, thumbs still grazing lightly across his cheeks.

It takes a few seconds for Taylor to register the question, then a few more as he prods at the back of his teeth with his tongue, clenches his jaw experimentally.

“Looks like it!” He confirms happily, though his joy sours a bit as Link’s hands leave his face to lean back on his arms, mourning the loss of contact.

“You’re a genius, Link,” Taylor praises, smiling and then smiling wider when he realizes that he feels no pain whatsoever. “Think you could do that again whenever my joints are acting up?”

He doesn’t really mean it - of course, a bigger part of him than he’d like to admit does, but his tone was supposed to come off as teasing - but Link’s eyes go wide and his cheeks darken further, and maybe Taylor wouldn’t mind at all if his friend takes that one hundred percent seriously.

“I- I mean, if you want t- If it’d help?” He fumbles, face flushing further as he stutters. It’s pretty commonplace to see Link a bit flustered, but it’s different when Taylor knows that he’s the reason for it. It’s pretty cute, in his opinion. 

“It’d do more than help. Chronic pain sucks ass, but you’d be, like, my personal angel,” Taylor says, looking up at Link. 

You already are, his mind adds for him. 

“Sure, then. Anytime. Uh, that’s what friends are for, right?” Link asks, those big brown eyes of his searching Taylor’s face for something.

He said “anytime”, is Taylor’s only coherent thought, one that runs giddy circles in his brain. I kissed Lincoln Li-Wilson. Twice. I just kissed my best friend twice. He said he’d kiss me again. God, I want to kiss him again. 

“Mm,” Taylor half-responds, still reeling from the way Link’s hands carded through his hair and smoothed over his cheeks and the way their lips slotted together. 

“Oh,” Taylor hears Link say distantly. “Okay, that’s, um. Okay.”

“Mm,” Taylor hums again, still in the process of rebooting what’s left of his brain.

A hand waves in front of Taylor’s face. “Taylor? You okay there, buddy? Did I do the spell wrong somehow? Please tell me I didn’t break you.”

You can break me anytime, Taylor thinks, mind conjuring images he definitely should not be having this close to the subject of his fantasies.

Taylor shakes his head in attempt to clear them. “All good, my man! Just, uh, thinking.” He desperately hopes his face isn’t as red as it feels.

“Wanna get back to homework, then?” Link says, gesturing to the pile of notebooks. “I think one of our make-up quizzes is due tonight.”

“Oh, shit, I forgot about that. We should probably get back to studying, huh.” He scoots away from Link to grab a notebook and his laptop, and for once in his life he misses the body heat of having a person next to him.

“Okay,” Link says, patting the empty space next to him and propping himself up against Taylor’s headboard.Taylor complies, settling himself into place at his side and handing him a pen (ballpoint, blue ink, Link’s favorite kind). He finds his own (a click pen, black gel ink) after a few moments of feeling around on the comforter.

“We’re still on chapter seven, right?” He asks, chewing on the end of his pen as he attempts to decipher the chicken scratch that is his own handwriting. 

“Unfortunately,” Link sighs, slinging his left arm around Taylor’s shoulders. 

As Taylor leans into Link’s side, he thinks that even though make-up work is bound to be hell, there are much less fortunate things than this. He smiles to himself, and it doesn’t hurt one bit.

#YEEHAW. ao3 may be down but my wild fic posting methods continue <333 #also!!! ty to everyone for being so patient about this!!! hope y'all like part 2! :Dc #as before. title from paper rings taylor swift! #hopefully i did not accidentally make 5000 billion mistakes in this and things are kinda sorta in character ahsvdhkasvdvs #dndads #swiftli #fic #happi scribbles

[traveler-at-heart]

Spy Kids

Summary: A sort of sequel to “Oy with the rookies already”. Maria asks you to train Kamala and America.

Natasha Romannof x Super Soldier Fem!Reader A/N: Mentions of blood, some violence, Reader being a babysitter (lol). And, so much damn fluff. -

It must be a mistake

“Questions?” Maria says, hands on her desk. She’s smiling as if she didn’t just give you the worst news possible.

“Yeah, just one. What the fuck?”

“Agent…”

“Maria! You want me to run a summer spy camp for two teenagers”

“No. I want you to train two enhanced individuals to make sure they are safe” you hold her stare and she gives up. “And also evaluate if they’d be good assets for the Avengers initiative”

“Oh, so now we’re collecting them like baseball cards?”

“We need to know their abilities. And make sure they can at least be safe on their own, if they don’t want to join us” 

“Isn’t one of them the founding member of the Carol Danvers fan club? Of course they’re going to join the Avengers if you ask”

“I’d still like to know what they can do. And given your success with Agents Belova and Bishop…”

Damn it. Who knew that would come back and bite you in the ass.

You think of all the plans you had for the summer. For the first time in years, it seemed like you’d have time off. Until now.

“And if I say no?”

“No one else has the time or capacity to do it” Maria shrugs her shoulders. “Don’t worry, I’m sure a 15 year old with powers and no training can hold her own.”

“Ugh. Fine” you snatch the file from her hands. 

You just hope this time you don’t actually have a heart attack.

*

Natasha took the news surprisingly well. She thought it was cute that you were the designated babysitter for the summer. 

“It’s good practice for when we have our own kids” she had casually mentioned, making you blush furiously.

She couldn’t possibly know…

You put those thoughts aside, plastering a smile on your face as soon as Kamala Khan walked to the foyer of the Avengers Compound… followed by an endless line of grown ups.

Relatives, perhaps?

“Will you be in charge of my beta?” a short woman approaches you. You’re at least one foot taller than her, but her gaze makes you feel small.

“Mom” Kamala hisses and then turns to you. “Hi. Sorry, I’m Kamala and this is my mother, my father, my brother, his wife and my friend Bruno” 

“Well, nice to meet you all” you think of a way to politely remind them only Kamala can stay, but her mother pokes your side again.

“Listen closely. She will go to bed at a reasonable hour, will eat her vegetables and make sure you respect prayer hours. And no boys. Nod if you understand” 

“I…” she raises her eyebrows and you shut your mouth, moving your head up and down. Before she can give you a new set of rules, a portal opens behind you.

“Alright, kid” Stephen Strange says, allowing America to go through the portal. He looks at you and gives a short nod. “Y/N. I trust everything will be going smoothly”

“Is this the Harry Potter man you mentioned?” Kamala’s mother points at him.

“Mom! That’s Doctor Strange” 

“And I’m America Chavez” the girl offers her hand and you smile. Every member of Kamala’s family goes to introduce themselves and you end up tangled in a sea of names and waves.

“Alright!” you say, a little hysterical. “This is getting crowded. Say your goodbyes and follow me for a tour of the place and some quick team intros”

Everyone finally leaves and the two teenagers follow you, giggling excitedly. 

Yeap, you’re definitely the nanny.

*

“Fighting stance” you say, stretching your limbs with a satisfied smile. Kamala raises one of her legs, like the dude from Karate Kid. With a simple push of your hand, she falls to the ground. “Congrats, you’ve been successfully kidnapped or killed. Whatever you want for this scenario”

“I’d prefer neither” she grumbles, standing up.

“Chavez?” you turn to the other girl. Her fighting pose is better, but you dodge her fist easily. Two more movements and she’s down on the floor.

“Alright. We’ll work on some basic balance and defense moves. Once we do that, you’ll teach me how you actually use some of your abilities and incorporate them to combat” 

“Oh! Are we going to learn to use weapons?” Kamala asks excitedly. 

“Absolutely… not. Let’s get to work, kiddos” 

Two hours later and at least they’ve learned to duck when you throw a punch. When Natasha finally enters the gym, she finds you with your hands behind your back, counting the number of reps the girls are doing

“At ease, soldier” she chuckles, her chin resting on your shoulder.

“Hey, baby” you turn around, happy to see she’s back from her mission with Kate and Yelena. “How was the Rocket Team?”

“Blasting off at the speed of light, as usual” Natasha wraps her arms around your shoulders and you melt at the proximity. 

“Yeah, well, prepare for trouble and make it quadruple” you sigh, turning back to the girls who are still doing push ups.

“You’re not playing mean with them, are you?” Natasha tsks and you actually feel bad. “They’re just kids, detka. Play nice”

“Yes, love”

She pecks your lips before stepping back and you want to whine at the loss of contact. 

“I think you’ve had enough for a day” the Russian speaks to the two girls and they stand up, eyes wide.

“Yes, Agent Romanoff” America pushes the words out and Kamala catches the last part, echoing the words.

“Call me Natasha” the redhead winks and then turns to speak to you, loud and clear. “Catch you later, honey pie”

Blushing at her words, you look back at your new trainees. 

“Only she can call me that, understood?”

“Yes, Ma'am,” Kamala mock salutes and you smile. 

*

“I’m not sure this is what Maria had in mind” Natasha admonishes, but still smiles, leaning on her outdoor chair. 

“Well, all I wanted to do this summer was relax so we’ll just have to compromise, won’t we?” 

You’re both sitting outside, a cooler with beers and a plate of guacamole on a table between you. Natasha sighs and stretches her arms.

“The sky’s very pretty today” she peers up, her beautiful green eyes shielded by a pair of sunglasses. 

“Very pretty, indeed” you agree, looking at her legs. You love it when she wears shorts. 

“Eyes up here” 

You both laugh, until a figure covers the sun on your side.

“Hey, Hill” you say with a cheeky grin. Her all black outfit is a very stark contrast to yours and Natasha’s shorts and tank tops.

“Just wanted to check how Chavez and Khan are doing but I see you’re taking it easy”

“They needed resistance training and I wanted some time with my girl” you smile. “It’s a beautiful day out, so why not do both?”

“Right, where are they?” the woman looks around, trying to find the girls. You pull out your phone and unlock the screen.

“They’re currently at… yeah, they’re finishing their second lap around the Compound. I set an obstacle course and all they have to do is get through it. See? Easy” your smile fades as soon as you see the girls coming back, looking like they’re about to pass out. Well, shit. Trying to distract Maria, you call her out again. “Hey, have some guac”

“No, that’s ok” 

“I insist” 

“It’s really good” Natasha chimes in, trying to control her laughter.

“Fine, weirdos” Maria grumbles, taking a chip and then dipping it in the guacamole. Her eyes are wide open when she tastes it. “Holy crap! This is really good!”

“Told ya” you smirk, frantically signaling for the girls to sneak behind, back to their rooms. 

You exhale when they’re both out of sight, plopping back down on your chair. Natasha squeezes your shoulder, chuckling.

Ok, maybe you’d go a bit easier on them starting now.

*

All you bring back to the kitchen is the cooler with the empty bottles, since Maria decided to steal your plate. 

Kamala is sitting at the kitchen island, facetiming her mother. 

“I gotta go” she rushes to hang up as soon as you walk in.

“No, don’t stop on my account. Your mom will think I’m keeping you locked up” 

“That’s ok, she can be overprotective sometimes” the girl rolls her eyes, but you can tell it comes from a place of love.

“Nothing wrong with that. It’s sweet” 

“Not when you’re sixteen” Kamala laughs and you sigh.

“Boy, I was sixteen such a long time ago” you remember the music and the outfits with a distant smile.

“You’re like 30” Kamala says, confused and you snort.

“I’m a super soldier. Our aging process is a bit… slower” you explain and her eyes widen. 

“Sorry, I forgot for a second”

“No worries” you clean around, making sure everything’s in place or you’ll never hear the end of it from Grandpa Steve. 

After a few seconds, you feel the girl staring at the scars in your arm and legs, usually covered by your suit or everyday clothes.

“I didn’t mean to…”

“Kamala. It’s ok” you sigh. “Listen, a lot of the people here didn’t get to choose this life. We were forced into powers or skills we didn’t want. And it’s a lot to carry, but we try as best we can. Remember you have the chance to decide, ok? I don’t want anyone taking that away from you or America” 

“Thank you” 

You nod, feeling a bit exposed. You’re usually much more guarded around people you just met. 

“Right, see you later for movie night?” you’re definitely not expecting Kamala’s squeal of joy. She runs back to her room, asking if she can pick the movie and wondering if there’s enough candy in the Compound.

“Movie night? Why am I not invited?” Yelena says, her accent thicker than usual.

“You’re always invited, little widow”

“Great! I’ll bring the vodka” she struts down the hall.

“They’re underage, Yelena!” 

“That’s ok, I’m not sharing”

*

Later that night you find Yelena, Kate, America and Kamala sitting on the floor, giggling. You squint your eyes at the cups they’re holding.

“What is that?” you point to the two teenagers, eyes trained on Yelena.

“It’s soda. Gosh, you’re such a panty pooper”

“It’s party pooper, Yelena” you pinch the bridge of your nose. “And I am not”

“You can be” Natasha joins, kissing your cheek and smiling. She looks at the group. “Are we expecting anyone else?” 

“No, Sam is visiting his sister, Steve and Bucky left on a mission” 

“Girls night!” Kate and Yelena shout at the same time. 

The next minutes are a blur of screams to coordinate the rest of the evening.

“I wish they were this effective for mission planning” you say, amazed. Girls night includes a lot of snacks, face masks, makeovers and in the end, an improvised race.

Kamala has created a sort of sliding board with her powers and now they are all taking turns going down the hill around the Compound’s green area. 

“Are you sure you want kids? Seems like we already have enough children under our care” you say, looking at Yelena and Kate roll around in the grass after jumping from the board.

“Yes. I want to see you change diapers and read bedtime stories” Natasha says, leaning against you.

Kissing her temple, you go back to watching the girls. Now the four of them have climbed on the pink and purple board, hoping it will take their combined weight.

“Be careful” you plead. Natasha pinches your side, but a minute later you’re proven right. The group slides down at full speed, on their way to hitting a tree. 

“I got this!” America shouts, opening up a portal… that leads right behind you and Natasha.

“Shit!” you cover Natasha with your body, her back on the ground. Four bodies fall on top of you, but you hold yourself up to not trap Natasha. “Everyone ok?”

“Yes”

“Great, now get off my back. Pronto” little by little, the weight you carry diminishes. Yelena is the last one to stand and you’re about to get up, when Natasha pulls you against her.

“Not so fast” she smirks as you land between her legs. Natasha takes advantage of your surprised gasp, meeting your lips in an open mouthed kiss. 

“Baby” you moan against her neck, caressing the leg that is wrapped around your waist.

“Sooo gross, ugh” Yelena runs in the opposite direction, followed by the rest of the group.

You laugh against Natasha’s lips, happy that she’s always with you to make everything better.

*

“Clear” Kamala says, opening the door to one of the rooms. 

“Wrong” you appear behind the door, shooting her with a Nerf gun. “One down. One to go” you turn to America but she’s faster than you expect, opening up a portal so the dart you shoot ends up hitting Kamala again.

“Dude!”

“I’m sorry” 

“Ok, you can take a break. And then we’ll keep practicing until I’m out of darts. But hey… you’re both doing great, ok?” you encourage and the girls nod. You’re taking what Natasha said at heart and you are trying to be nicer.

When they get to the kitchen, they find a distressed Natasha.

“Is everything ok?” America is the first to speak, expecting a national security crisis.

“Oh, yeah. I just forgot a couple of things from the grocery store. Silly me” 

“We could go if you’d like” Kamala offers.

“No, you’re busy training”

“Y/N gave us a break… and we’ll be fine. We have powers. And I’ve traveled through dimensions. What’s a trip to the grocery store?” America insists and Natasha smiles.

“Well, alright then”

The girls are giddy with excitement. They obviously take a little detour to grab ice cream, chatting as they reach the grocery store. 

America adds a couple of snacks that were definitely not on the list and just as they’re arguing over which M&M’s are better, another voice chimes in.

“I think we should get both” you say and Kamala nods in your direction.

“Y/N is riii… what are you doing here?” 

“Oh, I’ve been following you since you left the Compound. Not once did you notice my presence” you smile, leaning against the shelf.

“Have we failed all tests?” 

“Relax, you’ve been training for two weeks. It’s a process. Now hurry up so we can go back in time for dinner” you wink at them and they smile.

“About the M&Ms?” America grimaces and you roll your eyes.

“Bring both, but don’t tell Kate, because I always make her choose”

And yeah, you were testing them but maybe, just maybe, you wanted to make sure they were safe as well. 

*

Kate and Yelena are actually great teachers. You smile as they teach America and Kamala some of their own moves. 

“That’s good, yes America Chavez” Yelena compliments and the girl smiles.

“Why, thank you, Yelena Belova”

You let them go on for another half hour, until you look at your clock. There’s something you need to pick up before the shop closes.

“Alright, cardio and then hit the showers, stinky minions” you say and the girls laugh.

“That would make you Gru” Yelena points out and you show her your tongue.

“I just need to drink some water” Kamala asks, reaching for her bottle. She spits a second later, coughing. “Oh, my God, this is definitely not water”

“Sorry, that’s mine” Yelena says sheepishly. 

“Nice, vodka for training. You ok, Double K?”

“Double K? We never got cool nicknames” Kate whispers.

“Am I drunk?” the girl yell whispers and you chuckle.

“No, you’d need a lot more than that… don’t tell your mom, though. She’ll kill me” 

“Let’s get you up” America offers her hand. You’re about to say something else when Maria walks into the gym, a grim look on her face.

“Agent Y/LN. There’s an urgent mission” she says and you sigh. Yelena’s head snaps up.

Lately, you only go on missions if it’s really bad.

“You can read the report on your way there” Maria says.

“That bad, huh?” 

She confirms with a nod and you sigh. 

“Hey, Yelena? I need to ask for a favor” you say with urgency and she nods.

“You’ll be back soon, right?” Kamala seems alarmed, but you smile.

“Yeah, no worries. I’ll be back in a day or two, kiddo”

The girls nod, but Yelena knows better.

Still, you wish for it to be true. 

*

Two days turned into six.

By the time it was all done, you were operating automatically, trying to lock away everything that happened somewhere very deep down your mind. A place where all the terrible memories lived.

You could have gone to the Compound directly, but you didn’t want the girls to see you like this.

Unsurprisingly, Natasha had anticipated this and was waiting at the safe house. When you first opened the door and your eyes met green ones, clouded by concern and fear, you wanted to turn back and run away.

But you had promised each other to be open. And trust.

So you trusted, stepping inside the small house.

“You’re…” she says, her voice small.

“It’s not my blood. I’m gonna get cleaned up. Ok?”

“Ok”

The suit stays on as you turn on the shower. You stand there for twenty minutes, watching as the blood and the dirt get washed away.

“Detka. The water is cold. Come here” she pleads, removing your clothes and trying to get you to snap back.

Hours go by.

Everything comes back as you look down at your clean hands, a stark contrast to the mess they were before.

They’ll never be clean.

You cry and hold on to Natasha. She’s the only one that understands.

“I don’t ever want them to feel like this” you whisper into her hair and she knows what you mean.

The next morning, you go straight to Maria’s office.

“I don’t need a debriefing now” she says, her voice soft.

“The summer camp, whatever the hell you called it. Stops now. I won’t actively encourage them to go through this”

“You saved an entire city” Maria reminds you.

“A family… didn’t make it. You know that”

“So you’d rather not save anyone at all?” she questions you. “Hell, even if you don’t train them anymore they could ask to be in the team when they grow up”

“It stops. I’m out”

You both stare at each other for a minute, and you know she’s sizing how serious you are. Maria sighs defeated. There is no middle ground, not anymore.

“Fine. But you’re telling them”

“Ok” 

Yelena finds you in the hallway.

“You ok?” she squeezes your arm and the gentleness of her voice makes you want to cry, so you only nod, looking down. “It’s safe in my room, for when you need it, ok, seestra?”

Oh, shit.

“I completely forgot”

“Come find me later and we’ll think of something. But you should really get to the kitchen now, yes? Eat something. Papa says it’s good for you”

“Thank you” you pinch her cheek and the playful move makes her smile, comforted at seeing you joking.

There’s another surprise waiting for you in the kitchen. Kamala, America and Kate are cooking breakfast; they turn around and their smiles are bright at the sight of you.

Now you understand why Maria asked you to tell them.

Damn her.

“Hey, kiddos” you approach slowly. Natasha eyes you curiously, sipping her coffee and reading the paper. She’s the only one that knows about your talk with Maria.

“We missed you. And thought you’d like some breakfast” Kate smiles.

“We have chocolate chip pancakes, scrambled eggs with bacon…”

“I made carrot pudding. It’s kind of like a comfort food for me” Kamala explains shyly.

You’re pretty certain you’re about to cry so instead, you drag the three of them to your arms and hug them.

“Oh, wow, she’s really strong” America says, struggling to breath.

“We need air, soldier” Kate pleads and you let them go. 

“Hey, let’s fly the Quinjet today” you propose and the teenagers squeal.

“Really?” 

“Yeah, it’ll be fun. But don’t throw up or anything” you grimace at the thought. 

“Can I be copilot?” Kate says, pretending she’s cool if you say no, but you nod and she dabs. “Yes” 

You roll your eyes, going to sit next to your girlfriend. You bring her hand to your lips, a silent thank you for taking care of you.

“Are you going soft?” she whispers and you chuckle.

“Maybe. Don’t tell anyone, though” 

“Your secret is safe with me”

*

Choosing to inform Maria the training will continue over text is better. You know how smug she gets when she’s proven right.

Later that day, you find Yelena at the gym, the rest of the team training as well.

“Troops, I’m calling for a meeting”

Kate, Yelena, Kamala and America gather around you. 

“I have a mission for you” 

*

It’s a beautiful day outside, and a perfect excuse to drag Natasha to Central Park Zoo along Yelena, Laura and the Barton bunch. 

Steve, Sam and Bucky are carrying some of the tables while Kate and America hang the fairy lights around the trees. 

“Looking good” you give them a thumbs up and walk over to Tony, setting up the last of the mini golf course. “Everything good, Stark?”

“Mechanism should be ready” he points at the little course, four separate roads leading to four holes. “Each time Red gets a ball inside a sign will turn”

“Signs are almost ready!” Kamala interjects, working her design magic. 

“You nervous?” Tony slaps your shoulder and you nod.

“Well, it’s only one of the most important moments of my life” 

“Don’t worry, we’ll all be watching from inside, cheering for you. And judging you if you screw up”

“Nice, Stark” you roll your eyes but smile.

By the time Natasha’s back, everything is ready and you steady your breathing, acting as if it’s just another afternoon.

“How was the zoo?” you greet when she walks into your shared room.

“Yelena tried to steal a penguin” 

“So, the usual” 

“I’m really sorry, detka. I wanted to stay with you today but Lila and Cooper gave me those puppy eyes”

“It’s fine. Got some work done. Want to take a walk around? It’s still nice outside”

Natasha eyes you a bit intrigued but agrees, so you go out after taking a quick shower. You offer your hand, leading her to the front entrance, away from the setting. There are a few things you need to say before you get there.

“Remember our first date?” you finally speak and she laughs.

“I remember how you asked me”

“Oh, yeah” you snort, blushing at how bad that was.

“We’d barely made it out of that Hydra base, battered and bruised”

“And I asked what was the one thing you always wanted to do but never got around to doing” you reminisce.

“I said playing mini golf. And you…”

“I said all I ever wanted was to ask you out on a date”

“As if it was so scary” Natasha rolled her eyes.

“It was at the time. Trusting someone, opening up. Love. But you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me” 

“Stop” she blushes and you laugh.

“There’s something I want you to see”

You finally reach the spot and it looks amazing with the lights on. The little mini golf set up is on. You look up, the entire Avengers team eagerly waiting by the window.

“What’s this?” Natasha says, looking around. Then her eyes land on you and you shuffle, anxiously. “You are going soft”

“Oh, well. Now, come on. I want you to play”

“Mini golf with a trained spy? My aim is impeccable, you know”

“Especially when you’re pissed. But you’re not now, are you?”

“No, just very happy” she pecks your lips and you blush. “Alright, watch me beat your super soldier ass, babe” 

“Oh, nice one, Tasha” 

Natasha chuckles, hitting the first ball. It ends up going to the last hole. A sign turns around.

Me?

Another ball goes, hitting the second hole. 

You

“You, Me?” Natasha reads, trying to make sense of it. Fortunately, she hits the first hole and there’s a new sign.

Will you ___ me?

“Baby”, she turns around, her arms going around your neck. “All of this to ask me to fuck you?”

“What?”

“Will you fuck me? Such a romantic” she chuckles against your lips.

“Stop being a smartass and finish the game, Romanoff. There’s one more sign to go”

“I love you” she whispers against your lips. 

She knows what you’re about to ask, that’s for sure. But you let her finish the game anyway, kneeling when the last sign turns.

“Will you marry me?” you ask, and this is the most terrifying thing you’ve ever done. You hold the ring Yelena kept safe before you left for that last mission. 

“Of course I will” Natasha answers, breathlessly.

Your hands are shaking when you slip the ring down her finger and she smiles, admiring it. 

“I love you” you pick her up, kissing her, hoping she understands she’s your entire world.

Everyone joins you then, congratulations going around. You pretend you don’t see Kamala and America toasting with that very expensive champagne Tony brought.

Natasha is showing the ring to Laura and Lila, speaking about how she had no idea you were all planning this.

“Is that why you tried to steal the penguin?” Kamala chimes in.

“Uh… sure” Yelena nods unconvincingly.

You roll your eyes, as the team keeps celebrating with food and drinks.

“Glad you made it” you greet Maria, who is once again enchanted by your magic guacamole.

“So this is what you were planning on doing with your summer? I would have totally understood, Y/N”

“Don’t worry about it. It ended up being perfect” you say, turning to the girls. Apparently, this is the first time they’ve met Peter and America is asking for proof that he doesn’t shoot webs out of his butt.

“They have a long way to go, don’t they?” Maria smiles.

“Yes. But I’ll be there every step of the way. And maybe, the world will be a lot kinder to them”

The rest of the night feels like something out of a dream.

Natasha Romanoff will be your wife.

Before the Bartons leave, Tony sets the helmet at one of the tables, programming it to take a picture. 

“Family photo” he announces and everyone gathers around. 

“America, Kamala, get over here, quick” you ask, pointing to the spot next to you. The girls beam, hugging each other.

“At the count of three, I want everyone to say…” Tony instructs and you all laugh.

“Assemble!”

#Natasha Romanoff x Reader #Natasha Romanoff x you #Natasha Romanoff x y/n

[aloesarchives]

Kengan Omega Thoughts

I finally caught up with Kengan Omega now and I... Um, What?

*Spoilers for the lastest chapter!*

I know I shouldn't be rooting for him because he's supposed to be a villain but for all things under the fucking sun he's hot. Look at him, he's pretty for being over like a hundred years old or some thing like that. Fucking aging like mf wine, jesus christ.

Mukaku dying is good because while he did care to some extent, he was overall terrible person. It's funny how he could've done something if he actually never gave up when dark Niko defected to the worm if he still trained our Niko and try to stop the worm. But his flaw of giving up when he knew he lost probably got him to where he was. Plus his motives to kill and get rid of the worm wasn't for virtue or the greater good, it was to get revenge on the connector for murdering his clan which resulted in him having people die because he instigated them.

It sort of falls under the theme of conviction, tenacity, and motive that Kengan has. People with strong convictions and wholeheartedly believing in their motives to fight gives them power and strength in matches and training.

Just something I noticed when reading the "save Ryuki from the inside" arc in the manga. (which I left of from)

If this chapter came out early 2022 or 3 years ago, I would be frothing at the mouth right now seeing Joji and Waka interact. I'm happy that it's canon that the two of them actually know each other. Dude, even Waka knows Joji is a troublemaker, lol. Though I'm out of my Joji and Wakatsuki phase, I still love them dearly. Especially Joji, the man is funny, empty-headed, nonchalant. I personally want to thank Sandrovich for including Joji more in Omega and making him as comic relief. He so himbo-coded, I love it.

Ugh, I love them so much! They have come a long way since the beginning of Omega. I'm so happy for them. Ohma, Ryuki, and Koga, nice development and growth.

I'm sorry, but this fucking panel had me cackling. I know it's meant to be serious and all but it reminds me all too much of this picture below:

Dude, you know it's serious when four of the most powerful people are in an absolute state of shock. The Worm and the Death Dealers don't play around. But I kinda wish they didn't make Shen be this over powered because we don't know who's gonna beat him. I mean, they already stated that Lolong, Agito, nor Raian could defeat him. Hell, we don't know what happened to Ohma since he witness that even the fangs of Metsudo are no match for him. I mean, it'll probably go down to more of Koga fighting him if anything but he'll get his butt handed to him. I wouldn't be surprised if Ryuki fights Shen because it's hinted that there are more then one connector since Mukaku put two and two after realizing that Ohma looked more like Ryuki then with Shen. I think it would be fun to hear that Ohma is a clone of Ryuki and Ryuki is a connector but was sealed away in one of those tube thingys in like the movies. That could explain why he doesn't remember much of his past besides training with Mukaku unlike Ohma who was remembers being a child in the inside.

So we know that Ohma is definitely a clone. Unsure if he's a clone of Ryuki and unsure if Ryuki is a connector himself. I guess we'll wait and see because it seems like the Omega is getting close to the end, like 75% done.

Nogi really is playing with fire and a hydrogen bomb. I understand and like his spirit. But Idemitsu makes a good point about all of this. I also liked how his reaction of shock is different from Yamashita, Nogi, and Katahara. Obviously it's shock but more of like "What the fuck? What the hell just happened?" versus the three's reaction being "Oh my fucking God, how did this fucking happened? What are we up against?" Idemitsu was aware of the worm and of its existence but only recently interacted with them. Whereas Nogi and Yamashita know what they are up against and how dangerous they are to the entire world. Katahara, on top of the two, has even experienced the Worm and even seen their atrocities as he had came across a Gu ritual where he ended up meeting Agito as he was the only survivor.

I just wanna see how this all goes down and what will happen to Ohma and Ryuki.

#kengan omega #kengan ashura #wakatsuki takeshi #tokita ohma #ryuki gaoh #koga narushima #Shen Wulong #kengan thoughts

[beesmygod]

JJBA PART 5, VENTO AUREO IS THE UNDERBAKED MESS I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT FIXING...PART 2

FIX 1: MORE KOICHI FOR THE MASSES

koichi! we love koichi, don't we folks? i know i do.

who's koichi? oh shit, that might be hard to explain.

pictured: koichi, in his dormant, yet most powerful, form.

if you DON'T recognize this little gremlin above, his appeal might be totally lost on you, and his appeal is necessary to understand if i'm going to convince you of what a fucking missed opportunity his narrative purpose could have been.

that's koichi hirose, the short king of morioh. i didnt think i would like him at all after realizing he was being set up as the deuteragonist and companion to the titular jojo of part 4, josuke. like, who the fuck was this little dork? get outta here! im here to see the joestars kidnap children and have homoerotic adventures. i am not here to be subjected to the trials and tribulations of a friendless, spineless, standless dipshit. i assumed he was going to be the designated joestar hypeman for the chapter, a role usually carved out for precocious children.

wrong! koichi gets hit with the stand arrow (the arrow the gives you stands, remember this) early on and gets dragged into a frightening battle of good versus evil right in his own backyard. the arrow and the responsibility that comes with it acts as the main catalyst for his transformation from nottie to hottie. in contrast to the bastardly joestars and their ilk, koichi is a genuinely kind, empathetic, and honest person; he's intended as a foil to the mischievous josuke. he brings to the table the platonic ideal of an every-man who rises gallantly to the challenges thrown at him because its the right thing to do. the series folds koichi as a main cast member to the point where he is one of the very few people on planet earth to draw a smile and praise out of jotaro kujo.

who's jotaro kujo? uhhh.

hmm. i'm getting to my point. but it might require a chart:

POINT: jotaro kujo, the man who probably has with the strongest stand in universe, who appears in 4 chapters out of a total of 9, and who is probably one of the most recognizable and beloved characters in manga history, trusts literally one person on the entire planet: koichi hirose.

SO:

when koichi shows up in part 5 right from the jump to act as the part 4 connective tissue, there is absolutely no reason why he can't stick around for longer than he does canonically so that he can satisfyingly fulfill his role as official vibe checker. let him be important!

---

oh my god, i can hear jojo fans groaning as they scroll through all that shit. so what?! did you make me read all that just to say "there should have been more koichi?!"

look, i need to make sure "we're" all on the same page and understand the perspective i'm coming from. "we", in this case, being the audience of both jojo fans this is primarily aimed at and fandom rubberneckers (greetings friends) who shouldn't have to comb a wiki exhaustively to decode my unhinged ramblings. it's essential background info that koichi is a fan favorite both in canon and in fandom. we gotta understand the role he wound up playing in the overarching struggle of good versus evil in his hometown to understand his narrative role in part 5.

YES. there SHOULD have been more koichi! but not just because we like to see him! he provides an established, trusted moral backbone for the audience. his reputation as a reliable guy is such that jotaro sends him on his own to investigate a young man who may be related to the dreaded bisexual nemesis of the joestar bloodline, dio brando. this is a big fucking deal. if dio has a kid that's really bad. how many backup plans did this guy have (answer: dude you have no idea).

---

ugh! part 5 koichi! if you really want to scream look up how he looks in the rohan spin off series.

in ep 1 of the "golden wind", koichi arrives in italy looking for our new jojo, giorno giovanna (who sucks, but that's a whole kettle of fish we can only barely touch on now). koichi, who has the street sense of one of those dogs that gets carried around in a luxury purse, instantly gets robbed by petty street criminal giorno in a rare burst of personality never seen again after this initial story-line.

okay whatever. after skipping a few eps, giorno and koichi team up to defeat the first stand together after drawing its ire during giorno's weird mafia test. the stand, black sabbath, stabs its victims with a stand arrow (the arrow that gives stands), causing them to either die or gain powers. this might be controversial, but its my personal opinion that its probably not good for a mafia to have a factory that creates jerks with super powers and its right to try to shut that down. after the fight, giorno reveals his dream to koichi of joining the mafia with the explicit purpose of reforming it from within. koichi promises not to report to jotaro about the fact that there's ANOTHER STAND ARROW until after giorno is initiated into the gang. god. jesus christ.

first of all, this GANG-STAR thing is the silliest shit anyone has ever heard. this is literally his for real goal throughout the entire story-line. which could have been great! but people within the fiction should react to this like hes telling them he's going to invent the first bicycle for fish instead of looking at him with the kind of wonder and glory you reserve for jesus christ himself. this train of thought leads to too many thoughts about giorno's lack of personality, so let's set it aside for now. i think giorno should maintain this insane goal, but he should actively have to convince people that he is capable of doing something that fucking nuts.

second, no way would koichi agrees to this absolutely braindead truce lol. koichi doesn't know giorno from adam; the sense we're supposed to get is that koichi innately senses that he's a good guy from his little speech and we, the audience, are supposed to take his word for it. but there is nothing convincing or authentic in how the situation plays out. there's a level of naivety/stupidity applied to the characters involved for this situation to work at all: i dont know why telling jotaro in florida that there's a stand arrow in italy would impact giorno's mafia standing at all. especially considering the arrow breaks and no longer functions shortly after giorno's initiation. koichi should find giorno's dreams and desires spurious and continue his investigation for jotaro, both to impress him and because its the right thing to do. he should also be like "heh, i took care of a stand arrow for you mister kujo". let him have another win. fuck it. why not.

third, koichi doesn't know that the stand arrow is destroyed and i have a hard time believing that he, a victim of said arrow, would do anything other than raise serious alarms over the proliferation of objectively evil stand users in italy where dio's son coincidentally happens to live. the following arc in which giorno and his new team mates go on a hunt for a hidden treasure should have been a series of demonstrations to koichi that italy was being cleaned up by a joestar (as opposed to the danger of being exploited by a brando) and was ultimately in good hands. this would require giorno to get some wins in during this time so he would actually have to do something for a change.

keeping koichi around long past where he does in canon could and should have given giorno a chance to demonstrate a different form of heroism to contrast the pure-hearted pursuit of justice championed by koichi. in eventually winning over a familiar and trustworthy character, giorno would have proved himself to be more than just "dio's son", a fact which should have hung over this part like a dark cloud.

but that's. that's next time.

#jjba #part 5 #vento aureo #golden wind #long post // #essay #s. sorry.

[fishgirl514]

I REREAD UR INTRO POST. MP100. need to tell u this. consider aslfua mpo au. on one hand. esper cheol. his repression and social anxiety swag. listen 2 me… him playing w his powers in the countryside …. but then he doesnt use them at all anymore ….

ALSO TERU!JINSEOP

SORRY I AM RESPONDING TO THIS LATW i had to let it marinate sufficiently in my head it was just so good…..

jinseop and teru both had to experience humbling but jinseop could definitely maybe use a little more LMAO free my girl song-i rest she deserves better T_T

also thank you so much for cheol psychic powers bc he has always been so autism to me (avoiding eye contact, extremely awkward, not very good with adults and being formal, struggles to process and express his feelings, shuts down and stops speaking when he’s freaked out, intimidating by accident, prone to outbursts when overwhelmed, quiet, uncomfortable around people, antagonized by the school system and the people around him despite being the victim because of a perceived “threat”, mi-ae is his adhd counterpart) and we all know that mp100 is about autistic people have psychic powers

mi-ae is kind of like tome? the energy and the goof factor for sure. she would be a non psychic who thinks psychics r so cool and her whole arc w cheol would be him thinking she only likes him for his abilities and he’s kind of like god fuck off!!! bc he feels like all anyone cares about is his powers whether they’re scared of him or they want to use him or they’re gawking at him and treating him like a zoo exhibit. everyone being scared of him bc they’ve heard he has insane powers and had an outburst in the past, but she genuinely just wants to be his friend bc she remembers being friends as kids and stuff and he starts using his powers in little ways to protect her !!!!!!! UUUAAAAHHHH

LIKE LIKE the first time it happens it s like he hasn’t used his powers at ALL in like years but one time mi-ae gets into trouble and someone kind of starts to threaten her and suddenly he uses just a little bit of psychic power to freeze the guy and be like hey dude. stop. AAAAAAHHH !!!!! literally thinking abt this in real time oh this post is going to be an essay. and then he starts using his powers to like. catch her when she trips or send a note across their windows or silly little things as he gets more comfortable using it again. ugh. i love them. and her genuine lack of fear of him and appreciation for who he actually is makes him fall in love like in the regular series OTL

and obv we don’t know shit about whatever the hell happened between them back in the country side STILL UGHHH but i would think it would b something like. they are like playing together and he’s using his powers comfortably and freely in front of her and it’s such a bonding moment god i love them <33333333!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and like in the future he likes to float her around to tease her (she also loves it and requests it because she gets to be taller than him and fly like an airplane LOL)

he will put her in air jail when she needs to settle down

i also feel like they might have a fight scene with some sort of “jason this isn’t you :( just look at me jason ok? it’s just you and me right now” kind of moment LMAO but it would actually be good and not corny, more like the scene from avatar with aang and katara in the desert

anyway THANK you for this i am going to think about it forever i hope i was able to contribute and expand upon it

#literally in love this is so cute and fun #aslfua #mp100 #mop cycle #cheol and miae #after school lessons for unripe apples

[spookymultimedia]

That Funny Feeling

When Cartman discovers his intersex condition he's excited to tell everyone, but they don't react the way he expects.

Liane drove home quietly from the doctors office with a distant look in her eye. Little Eric Cartman was sitting in the passenger seat looking out the window with a small smile. After weeks of threatening the doctors for answers about his body, they finally confessed that he was intersex. He had partial androgen insensitivity to be exact. He was told there was a possibility that he could develop gynecomastia soon. He was 12 years old and his chest already looked different from the chests his friends have. It wasn't firm or flat like Kyle's, it was all squishy and weird. It felt wonderful to finally understand what was going on with his body. In fact, he actually felt kinda special and proud. He was different from other kids. He had a mix of male and female features. It was obviously a sign that he was a God trapped in the form of a young boy. But soon enough everyone would see his beauty and power and worship him at his feet. He was excited to tell the guys about this. He kicked his feet gleefully and hummed to himself.

He glanced up at his Mom. She had that look on her face that she usually made when she was mad at him. What the fuck did he do now? Was she upset that he told the doctor he would call the police and report him as a sex offender if he didn't explain why his body was different? It was completely necessary. It was like pulling teeth to force that doctor to tell him he was intersex. It wasn't like the police were going to believe him or anything. He just knew his Mom was gonna give him shit when he got home. She should now better than to talk to a God like that. Why should she have to listen to her?

Once she pulled into the driveway he sighed, preparing himself for the lame ass lecture he was going to get. But it was quiet. She walked into the house with him without a single word about his empty threats to the doctor's office.

"Mom, can you believe it? I'm intersex! I'm the coolest fucking kid on the block! Isn't that wonderful!?"

He walked into the house with a skip in his step. He looked over at her. She just sat on the couch and buried her head in her hands.

"Mom? Are you listening to me!?"

She just sat there quietly. Her shoulders shook as she began to cry. He stood there frozen in confusion. This was good news. Wasn't it?

"Mom. . .?" He mumbled. He walked closer to her. She pulled her head up and looked at him.

"Don't tell anyone else about this, do you hear me?" She commanded. His throat suddenly felt dry. He stared at her trying to understand what she meant. There was a weird funny feeling deep inside of him that he felt in his stomach. It grew the longer she stared at him like that.

". . What?"

"Don't you dare say a word about this to anyone! No one needs to know about this." Her tone was harsh.

"Why?"

She just continued to cry.

"Why? Why, God why?" She breathed out.

He sighed and rolled his eyes at her. He walked up to his room and immediately picked up the phone on his desk. He called Stan and waited.

"Hello?" It was Sharon.

"I want to speak to Stan." He demanded. She sighed and yelled out for Stan.

"What is it?"

"I have something to tell you guys! Meet me by Starks Pond! Tell Kyle to come and I'll get Kenny!" He said in a rush.

"Can't it wait till tomorrow?"

"What? No way!"

"Dude, just tell us at school tomorrow."

"Ugh fine, whatever." He hung up the phone.

The next Morning he ran up to the bus stop with a bounce in his step. He hummed to himself with a smile, waiting on Stan and Kyle. He grinned wide when he saw Stan and Kyle coming.

"You guys!! I have the best news ever!" He called out.

"What?" Kyle asked and walked up next to the bus stop. Kenny walked over to face Cartman.

"Yesterday I found out why my body is so different!"

"Cus you're a fattass?" said Kyle.

"Ey! Don't call me fat! It's not that! Guys! I'm intersex! Is that hella cool or what!?" He shouted proudly.

He was met with silence. Kyle and Stan blinked at him.

Kenny cocked his head, "Huh?"

"What? What the fuck does that mean?" Kyle asked.

"You're gay?" Stan asked stunned.

"What!? No!" He shook his head, "You know! Intersex!"

"I've never heard of that." It was Kyle's turn to cock his head.

"I- well you see-. It's uh- I have male and female features."

Kyle furrowed his eyebrows, "What!? No way that's impossible. You can't have a dick and a vagina!"

"That's not what I mean!"

"Wait, you're not a boy!?" Stan asked wide eyed.

"No, I am a boy Stan!" Cartman yelled.

"But you said you're a boygirl!" Kyle said accusingly

"I said I have male and female features! I mean, physically!"

"Cartman you do not have a vagina! I know you have a dick!" Kyle asked.

Cartman smacked his hand on his forehead, "I never said I had one asshole!"

"Then what do you mean?"

"I. . .- I mean. My chest, my voice. Kyle I don't have any balls."

"Yes you do they're just tiny and shoved up your fatass!"

"No I don't!"

"Whatever, I don't have time for this."

At school, Cartman searched up intersex conditions on a school computer and proved to Kyle that he wasn't making this up. But Kyle accepted that being intersex is a real thing, but he wasn't convinced that Cartman was intersex. He didn't understand why Cartman would lie about something like that; unless he wasn't lying. He didn't know how to feel about it.

When Cartman told the teachers they just looked at him with pity, or worse, disgust . They all felt sorry for him. He couldn't understand what they all felt so sorry about.

"Okay so you're a boy but you're also not a boy?" Stan asked after school.

"No Stan! You're not listening to me! Being male, female or intersex is a physical thing!"

"Well duh. Boys have dicks and girls have vaginas and boobs while you're something between that."

"What? No. Being classified as male and being a boy are two different things!"

"Is it because your outsides don't match with your insides? Are you transgender or something?" Kyle asked.

"What? No. I'm just a special type of boy!"

". . .but. . .your body isn't a boy body."

"Boy is a gender! Not a fucking sex category!"

It was quiet for a moment.

"Are . . .are you saying being a boy isn't a physical thing?" Stan asked.

"Yeah dumbass."

"Then. . .what makes you a boy?"

Eric scrunched his nose at him. He wasn't sure how to answer that. He just felt it.

"I just am one, okay?"

No one was taking him seriously. They all refused to accept his body as the beautiful holy thing it was. Maybe they would understand his glory once his body was fully developed. Maybe they just couldn't see how special he was yet.

They all walked into his house. He grabbed a paper from the doctor on the table and handed it to Kyle. "See, it says it right there, I'm classified as intersex."

Kyle stared at the paper and blinked at it. He was telling the truth.

"Holy shit." Kyle mumbled. He stared at Cartman again. He took a good look at him. He looked at his face. His arms. His waist. "You do seem a little different."

"Look." Cartman pulled off his sweater and top and exposed his chest. The other three gathered close. "See? I'm developing boobs."

"Are you sure it's not fat?" Kyle said, staring at the small lump.

"No,it feels different from fat. There's like, breast stuff inside it or whatever." He poked it. There was something under there, "Kenny, touch it. You know about boobs. Doesn't it feel like a boob?"

Kenny took off his glove and looked at Cartman again for consent.

"Go on, touch it."

Kenny gently patted at it and moved it around. It hurt a bit when he tried to squeeze it.

"Mm!" Cartman flinched with a grimace.

"Sorry." Kenny mumbled and pulled his hands away, "they are boobs!"

"What's wrong?" Kyle asked Cartman, wide eyes.

"It hurts a little." He mumbled and rubbed where it hurt.

"It hurts??" Kyle said, shocked.

"Yeah it's all tender and stuff." He slipped his shirt back on.

"How big are they gonna get?"

"I don't know."

Liane walked upstairs from the laundry room and looked at them. She saw the paper in Kyle's hand and looked angry.

"Eric! I told you not to tell anyone!" She yelled.

"Whatever! It's my body!"

She stormed out of the house and slammed the door.

The three looked at Cartman.

"What- what was it you weren't allowed to say?" Kyle looked at him stunned.

"That I'm intersex."

"What? Why the hell not?"

He shrugged.

"I don't understand what's wrong with that. It's just your body."

"I donno." He mumbled, that funny feeling he felt when he came home yesterday returned.

"Are you going to get a period one day?" Kyle asked.

Cartman sighed, "No Kyle, I don't have a uterus, I just have ovaries."

". . .huh?"

He sighed, "Whatever, I'm tired of this conversation."

"Hey I heard there's a Phillip and Terrance video game that came out! Let's go see if the video store still has any available to buy!" Stan suggested after suddenly remembering.

"Yeah!" Kyle said with a smile.

"Yeah okay," Cartman mumbled.

#south park #south park fanfiction #eric cartman #liane cartman #stan marsh #kenny mccormick #kyle broflovski #intersex headcannon

[prettyflyshyguy]

S4 babey give it up for S4

I'm feeling bad today and the loser failboy Sam curse is still on me SO

liveblogging to cheer myself up

S4E3 - In the Beginning

(Cas sends Dean back in time and he meets his parents when they were dating. For context. Dean's mum has already made one passing comment, Dean made a passing comment, I'm fucking SWEATING)

DON'T BE FUCKING WEIRD

DON'T BE FUCKING WEIRD

DON'T BE FUCKING WEIRD

REJOICE

THEY WROTE A CHARACTER WHO DOESN'T INSTANTLY LOSE ALL THEIR DEPTH AND THEIR BRAINS FALL OUT OF THEIR HEAD UPON MEETING A WINCHESTER SIBLING

(Dean's mum is full committed to Dean's dad and we LOVE to see a happy healthy relationship we love to see it oh god I'm opinionated on how this show writes its women sometimes SOMETIMES)

-

I regret to report my enjoyment of this series is starting to DIP however I must continue as I REQUIRE KNOWLEDGE to write the fucking fic

I'm cursed with the disease of needing to cover all context, continuity, or at least have the knowledge so I can break it and rebuild it in a way that works, I don't want to Not Get a character and write them wrong, I need to reference the past, I need to pay homage

PRINCIPAL SKINNER????

I love Samuel. He's great.

Christ the entire winchester bloodline is just people selling something to a demon on repeat

-

S4E4 - Metamorphosis

Alright you can't give me an episode named like this and not pop off

do NOT disappoint me spn (I'm about to be dissapointed)

OH NAUR

SAYUM

(NOT APOLOGISING FOR THAT. YOU CAN LAUGH AT US FOR HOW WE SAY NO ALL YOU WANT BUT THAT'S HOW DEAN SAYS SAM WHEN HE'S AGITATED)

REAL FAILBOY SAD HOURS LETS FUCKING GO

In all seriousness this is a PHENOMENAL reveal scene on Sam's powers and Dean's response. I'm living for the tension. It fuels me.

"If I didn't know you I would wanna hunt you."

Going to be chewing on this line for the next month. Thanks. Thanks for this. Thanks.

Fuck you supernatural. Fuck you.

AND WE VIOLENTLY SHIFT TO THIS HAHAHAHAHA YES

Shoutout to the sound design team once again because every time this dude smashes food into his mouth it makes me want to start screaming violently (congratulations you've made the most triggering eating noises I've ever had the displeasure of experiencing AND I MEAN THAT AS A COMPLIMENT, ITS SO AWFULL BUT THAT MAKES IT SO GOOD)

Having very normal thoughts about this episode.

See if people had told me this show does the whole blood hunger thing as good as it does I'd probably have been on this years ago.

Who's doing this on the writing team. I need to thank them.

I don't have any intelligent words to describe this scene where Sam confronts Dean about (Sam's) insecurities over how Dean feels about him having demon blood, and the complications that brings to his life

other than to just post this

Thanks Supernatural this is good. This is really good.

HRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

FUCK YOU SUPERNATURAL

FUCK YOU

HOW FUCKING DARE YOU

UGH

Ok FUCK OFF that was a good episode

HUGE THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS AND OPINIONS ON THIS COMING AWAY

#shy talks #not art #shy liveblogs spn

[lmelodie]

TSCS Season 2 Episode 5

This episode...threw A LOT at me hard and fast, and me specifically. If you are also a fellow Council stan, you probably won't like this episode.

First, not too impressed that Cal is taking after his father and needlessly lying to Sandra to go fight Mad Santa. I love Cal, he brain really is empty, but come on dude. At least try rubbing your two braincells together.

I also keep forgetting that the way the lore is set up, Scott is the first and only human Santa. So, when it's said that Magus was Santa for centuries, I had to do a double take lol. Keeps throwing me for a loop!

Can't believe they got rid of Bernard YET AGAIN. IN A FUCKING FLASHBACK. It's almost funny how they've just given up on giving good excuses as to why Bernard can't be there. They just give him a mention and be like, "Yeah he's not here right now/anymore, ANYWAY."

And I wanna know why Bernard is at the very top of the maim list? What did he do that's worse than leading an actual coop? Good for him though, slay.

SO UGH!! My main beef with this episode is the fucking council! Because its utter BULLSHIT and completely out of character that they wouldn't help! I'm actually with Scott on this one surprisingly, you're telling me they can send Cupid to spy on him in his own home but not help the elves to rebel against a very clearly evil Santa???

They don't even give a good reason for it either! It's just a non-answer of "Legends can't interfere" which they most DEFINITLY CAN! Its bullshit! And I refuse to believe that the council would do this.

Like, you're telling me that this is the same council that seemed so sincerely supportive of Scott and his issues for the last two movies? The same council that came down to the pole to personally help pick up the slack in the third movie??? No, simply put I refuse to acknowledge that bullshit their trying to feed us, the council is nice and cares about the other members okay!

Also, I don't know how to feel about Befana being an ex-council member. I kinda liked her better as a cool forest dwelling Christmas witch that does her own thing and doesn't listen to a higher authority.

And maybe this could've worked better if there were any hints AT ALL to this being a thing, but it was never once implied up until this point that there has been any other council member's period. But of course, there wasn't! So, this development falls a little flat for me, not very impactful and a little jarring if anything.

He's a lemon...they turned him into a lemon. I can feel the years being taken off my lifespan...

And stealing the legendries powerful artifacts? NOT NECCESARY IN THE SLIGHTEST. Especially stealing cupid's arrows when normal arrows would've worked just fine! Are these arrows benign?? Are these gnomes gonna start falling in love when they wake up? Does the council currently know about all the stolen shit and have forgiven the elves and Befana? Do they STILL not know that this happened??

Also, really didn't need to use the arrows and sleep dust if you had Mother Nature's WIND AND LIGHTNING. LIGHTNING!! You couldn't win a battle with the actual (ill gotten) forces of nature???

This might be what I need to start drafting that hate fic. The spite fueled one shot. Because god damn there is so much petty CRIME happening here committed BY THE GOOD GUYS.

I don't even know how they're gonna possibly wrap all of this up, I am so tired.

#nonart #text post #review2 #the santa clause #the santa clauses #tscs spoilers #i did actually enjoy the “Not Bernard” line #that was kinda amusing #the council should not have to be butchered like this #when they're not even present!

[pancake-breakfast]

I've lost track of what migraine day I'm on, but Trigun Book Club persists and so shall I.

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 13, Chapters 4-6 below.

Chapter 4: Black

Voiceover Narration: Little did Livio know, but both the hat and the cape provided him with a +10 bonus to strength in addition to the moral boost. Someday, he would open up the stat screen for both and discover this, and then he would weep grateful tears that those who had so little gave him so much.

Oh, Elendira's got her own stat boost outfit, I guess.

I love how much tone she has in her voice. Between her body language and the translation, she's just a very easy character to hear in your head.

Ok, this panel is badass.

Ooh, she actually landed a hit on him. Hasn't done that in a bit.

Why's she sizzling? Is it because she's on fire right now?

(Also, she might be in full badass mode, but goshdarnit, she better not seriously injure my Livio. He's important to me and needs to live!)

Aaaand we're back to Legato's monstrosity.

Dude. He has to save some for fighting Knives, dummy. He's not Gojo utilizing Limitless and being able to just go forever. He's going through his Last Run. There's a hard stop to his power and it's coming up quick.

Hahahahaha, these poor guards. Space ships are, like, history bordering on mythology nowadays. They'd be more mythological if their bones weren't scattered across the planet. Seeing an actual functioning one that came from actual space would be quite something.

That's RIGHT, Luida's the one in charge!

Vance? As in advance? I mean, I know it's an actual name, but it's not a very common one and Nightow really seems to like just making names up, anyway....

Ok, so... Knives has always been a bit OP, but what I'm gathering from the Earth Fleet presentation is that this is a bit ridiculous even by the standards of a culture used to Plants.

Ok, I already have questions about how they know about any particular individual. I'm guessing they gleaned a lot of relevant information out of the remnants of Domina, but yeah.

Goshdarn, of course they were hoping to find Vash....

Dramatic Legato pose!

Man, why'd he get so sweaty all of a sudden? That can't be comfortable.

Awww, Legato's little toy got wrecked. TBH, that looks more like Knives' work than Vash's... but that's only because it's hard to tell the curvature of the cut. Knives tends to do straight cuts while Vash destroys things in orbs.

Ugh, Vash might look badass, but he does not look good. Someone get him a sports drink or something to perk him up. Do Plants love electrolytes in this world?

I wonder who the other two were. Knives and pre-bagworm Legato?

Uh, oh. Guess who's back. You done threatened Livio too much, Elendira.

Chapter 5: Battle of the Mystics

Yeah, Raz doesn't fuck around....

It's weird seeing Raz with short hair. Like, Livio with short hair? Not as cool as if he'd cleaned it up but kept it long, but it was so uneven I get it. Raz with long hair and that undercut? Good for his level of chaos. Short-haired Raz? Just feels too restrained for him.

"Some dumbasses," huh? That's a rude (but perhaps not inaccurate) way to refer to Wolfwood and Vash.

I do appreciate how much more intense and unhinged Raz is compared to Livio. Even Elendira seems a bit taken aback by the mood switch in her opponent.

Oh, that's right. He's used to wielding full-out punishers rather than the double-fangs.

He's gonna burn through ammo so fast using them like that. It's a good thing the guns in this series have ammo in plot amounts.

LOL, Elendira is already sick of Razlo's shit.

Uh. That's a lot of nails. I don't like this. She's being mean to my boy.

Oh, gods. I'm not sure even he can survive this.

OH GOOD IT WASN'T REAL. Dammit, Nightow. Don't scare me like that.

Oof, he's still not in good shape. :/

Chapter 6: Tag-In A Person

I feel like... Livo and Razlo are gonna tag-team this fight somehow....

Mmm, seems like Raz can't deal with Elendira's bloodlust.

Elendira! He needed that leg!

Oof, tiny Wolfwood memory....

The way Elendira says this makes me think she has some experience being on the receiving end of this herself.

Look at him. Pumped full of nails again, but still going. He's a freaking machine.

Ok, I love how Nightow has used the dialog bubble to let us know that Livio is back in control here. It's a small thing, but excellent use of the medium.

I love this conversation between Livio and Razlo. It's Livio making peace with himself, with him recognizing his alter and... sort of validating Razlo's existence, I guess? That Razlo is him and isn't him, and that's ok, and they are part of a tandem structure?

Oooh, are they both fronting? Or... like... Livio's fronting, but Razlo's kinda there, too. I'm not sure how much that works with DID, but it's interesting from a narrative perspective.

Again, wonderful bit of paneling here.

Hahahaha, he didn't even bother to remove the nails. I realize this is a way of telling us that someone is a badass, but... like... having holes in your muscles and/or tendons seriously mucks with your range of motion. If you have a healing factor, get that shit out of the way so it can kick in. Otherwise, you're limiting yourself pretty severely. Like, he shouldn't be able to stretch out to his full wingspan with stuff popping through his back like that. Ok, I'll stop. I know I shouldn't expect realistic anatomical consequences in this series.

Wait, where's Vash? I'm worried about babygirl....

Heheheheh, backwards-firing gun trick shot. Again.

Oh, this is lovely. He's fighting right now with a balance neither side of him generally displays.

Ooh, he got a solid hit on her.

Heheheheheh, mind Razlo still has the mohawk. As he should.

Elendira's got her priorities straight. Kill first, ask questions later.

There's something very satisfying (and maybe very important) about Livio praising Razlo. Not just leaning on him when he's afraid, but honoring Razlo's skill and technique and complimenting him on it. Raz wanted so bad to be needed and to be praised, and now he's getting the praise from probably the person he needed it from the most.

Wait. Wait, is Razlo going somewhere??

What's coming next that's so bad that Raz isn't sure he can keep up with it??

Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 8: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5 + Bonus || Vol. 9: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 10: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-8 || Vol. 11: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 12: Covers + 1-3, 4-6, 7-9 || Vol. 13: Covers + 1-3

Extra Credit: Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt. 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash || Vol. 8: The Uncoordinated Counterattack || Vol. 9: Justice, Punishment, and Mercy, The Tolling of an Iron Bell || Vol. 10: Crucifixion Symbology (pt. 2 of post), Merging of Families, Being Childlike (And Why God Hates Chapel) || Vol. 11: New Hair, New Outlook

#livio's a good boy and i'm glad he's here #trigunbookclub #trigun maximum #volume 13 #pancake thoughts