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#they really said now from the top make it drop 🎶
natsuyuki-w · 9 months
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Not one of the boys
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Twisted wonderland cast realizes that (Yuu) is a girl.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 Featuring: Leona, Ruggie, and Jack - Leech twins - Azul
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- (Wander) San? Where are you going? No running!- shouted Crewel. - Sorry! 'going to the bathroom! - I excused continuing my rush. - You better not skip PE pup.- - Don't worry professor, they are not. - reassured Ace. - What time... Damn it! I'm already late. - I entered the toilet with the gym bag.
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Period finished a couple of hours later, I heard our Homeroom teacher from afar - (Wander)San again? No running! And where are you going in...- - To the bathroom! - - But...Make sure not to be lat...Never mind. - and eyed me a second time, I was wearing the sporty uniform.
- At least the professors, I'm not asking much right? - I mumbled angrily. - This stupid secrecy...I can't even take a decent shower after gym. - I grumbled some more in the empty bathroom, doing the little I could with the sponge and the water of the sink.
Uncle
- Uncle Leona was so cool at Magift! - Cheered the little intruder sitting on my lap. After the excitement of seeing his relative, since I was the only one giving him attention, he decided to crawl up the sheets and use me as his vent.
- Veeery cool! He was * pwah and then *shwah and then "GOOOAL... Wait...wrong sport. - I recalled the last match. - But you know who's even cooler? - I smirked - The one who can defeat Even your uncle? - I dropped my voice down like telling him a mighty secret.
- Whatch whaddya say Herbivore - threaten the aforementioned. The kid giggled jumping up and down on my knees - Who is it? Who is it? - I cupped a hand to my mouth and waved him closer. - Is Cheka! - And I boopped his nose singing. - 'Cause, 🎶 you're gonna be the main event like no king was before. Brushing up on looking down, and working on your roar! 🎶-
- So loud - groaned the prince. - Hahahhaa yes!!! - The kid's strong cheers covered his lament - Have you heard Uncle Leona? Uncle (Yuu) says I'm the coolest!- Exclaimed the lion cub to the teenager lying in another cot.
- Pfha, She's not an uncle, and I don't care. - - He's right, I wouldn't Dare take that important title from him...- Pause - Wait, what have you just said? - - I don't care - responded the boy -...are we really playing this game? Before that. - - You are not an uncle - and after another suspension added - an aunty perhaps. -
.... - EH????? - Death dropped everyone in the room. Some shocked by the new information, some for the fact that He knew about the secret. I quickly went to his side and bent to face the splatted prince. Cheka followed suit amused by my shocked face. - Wh-what are you talking ab...- but the smirk on his face told me I couldn't deny anything. - But,... How did you know???-
- W-wait, so (Yuu), you really...you really?...- floundered Jack. Deuce and Ace went beside him to pat his shoulders. - I didn't know either. - added Ruggie backing a little. - So, I was actually careful... - I mumbled referring to the astonished duo.
- Hahahhaa Uncle (Yuu) pick me up! - the kid had totally ignored Leona's comment. Too stunned to realize the probable state crime accuse I could face, I hopped him on my hip. - Leona... How,...when?- - Entry ceremony. - - Eeeh? So soon... - - You threw the cape on the cat. That black shirt is fitting.- - B-but,... it was kinda dark.- - I can see well enough. - - But it could've been... a wrinkle of the clothes. -
- The morning after you snooped around our business I saw you two little detectives at the entrance and I eavesdropped. I needed to make sure you stayed in your place ya know? - Then he smirked - Mmmm if I recall it was something about a stunning boy calling you a little lady and a crop top rather than an XXL t-shirt. - Jack was now redder than before, and Adeuce facing each other questioningly. - Phrasing...so misapprehended.- I pouted. Then he nodded towards me - And you smell girly. -
I rolled my eyes. - I may be hiding but I don't wanna smell like..."Refreshing", "Boss", "Sport" - I mumbled - Okay okay you got it right, but next time, don't assume someone's gender. - I lectured. - Ah and please everyone, the headmaster wants it to be a secret, something about management...school stuff.- - Just that?... Not telling me to treat you right? - asked half joking the prince. - Treat me...? It doesn't change anything, I'm still (Yuu). You can treat me like always.- ...
- Well I mean SOMETIMES you could be a little nicer with everyone...- but he quickly stopped me with a daring growl. - Take your uncle good company Cheka - I whispered - Pour on him some more cute... I mean coolness. - he nodded and bounced on his uncle again. - I can't believe Leona beat me at this too. - commented Grim realizing he wasn't the first to find out about my identity.
Squeeze
The audacity of this monster… 
- Oh… so it is like that ah? - I rose from the seat at the table. The calm tone in my voice was mismatched by a terrifying shadow behind my eyes. - I wouldn't dare embarrass the Great mage Grim. Since I'm a good-for-nothing human my help would be a nuisance.- I took a breath and pondered - After all you already made the wiser decision, instead of accepting my, free, invitation to study together you went straight to the smart student. - and I flicked the anemone on his head. - I'm sure with your capabilities and sharp mind you'll be out of the situation in no time. - The trio gulped. Not even when they accidentally corroded my potion notebook they saw me that angry.
- Awww Koebi-chan, don't be upset. - chirped Floyd smiling. - Maybe making him work harder would be a good lesson teaching. What do you say, perfect? - added Jade with malice, Grim shivered from head to toe. - You are so cute Shrimpy. Let me help you the best way I know...- and before either I or Jack could do anything he grabbed and pulled my arm towards him. -...a hug to squeeze all this anger away. - - NOOO!!!! - screamed Adeuce.
The strong hold on me soon came loose. My face was flat on his torso, I looked up and confusion was plastered all over his face. - I'll consider your kind offer guys. And thank you for the sentiment, Floyd. - sarcasm dripping from my every word. I slipped off his hold and walked out sending a wave to my friends, Jack in silence followed and threw a glare at everyone left behind.
---
The three got dragged away by the anemone while Floyd stood still with his arms held lightly out. Jade spoke up - I swore you were going to give your usual...- - Soft...- murmured the other. - Excuse me? - - I think I'll need another test. - snapped the hugger. - Azul wants us back to the lounge. - stopped him and his brother while he aimed for our direction.
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- So ahem. Do you still want to go? Do you want me to ruffle them up a little perhaps? - asked Jack after a good minute of silence. I sighed - Of course, I'll go, I don't want to let them down. - A minute passed and mortified by my reaction I excused myself - Sorry for that. I was so frustrated. It stings so much.- - Don't worry, honestly, I think he deserved much worse, I could tell you were very hurt, I'm sorry. - - don't be... But thank you, Jack, for everything! You are so kind, I'm glad we became friends. - All his might crumbled in a blushing mess.
- S-so *ah-hem do you think he figured it out? The moray I mean. - - Probably.- I responded firmly.
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- Azarashi-chan...- Floyd crept on the grey cat. - Can I squeeze out of you a couple of things about dear Shrimpy? - said with a toothy smile that Grim knew better to confront with anything but assent.
Debt
- Your voice could be useful, but I'm already in stock. - As we sat on the plush couches of Azul's study we discussed the possible contract to free my friends. Jade lowered himself to whisper in the dorm's leader's ear. - WHAT??? - his collected gentlemanly persona completely slipped for a second, making me and Jack jump on the spot.
Azul covered his mouth looking me up and down, blushing again, and whispered back - Is it certain? - and the twins nodded. - But I would gladly test again... Koeeebi-chan can I give you another squeeze? - I found the heterochromatic eyes bored closely into mine. Jack growled receiving a lopsided smile
- So... (Yuu)san - continued the "mafia boss". - I think you might be already in debt with us, fufufu. - - For what? - I arched my brow. - Well, it would be a shame after all your good work in concealing your true identity...- -...good work...*PFFF...ask the other eleven. - I laughed - And here I thought you did a little digging. - I mumbled - I owe you nothing. I don't care at all to hide that I'm a girl, I'm doing it because the headmaster asked me to. He's worried that it would cause him problems or something. Honestly, I would gladly stop wrapping my chest in cloth and wear ALL the time baggy clothes. They are cute, don't get me wrong, but I would like some flattery sometimes. - I rumbled.
Awkward from my brutal honesty, he adjusted his glasses to compose himself and ask diplomatic - You're not worried about the consequences with Crowley? - - About you finding out? Because Floyd forcefully grabbed me and felt my boobs? No, I'm not worried. - - You Found Out How??? - sharply asked the mage. Floyd shrugged. - Yeah, and it was very soft. Then I kindly asked Azarashi-chan and he confirmed. - An irk formed on my forehead, today Grim really was getting on my nerves.
- However, you spreading the info around is a willing choice - I turned the table - so... I dunno, aren't You worried about the consequences? - He smirked - Not at all, now I have something else against..eh-hem...to speak to him about. - then sighed heavily -...perhaps this might not be useful for our predicament after all.- returned to his composed self. - L-let's return to our main topic. Shall we? -
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I know their surname is Leech… but they are Moray and you can’t tell me otherwise.
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cheeryraccoon · 2 years
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The Ego's Birthday
I know this is late but I was busy on Mark's actual birthday then had to come up with ideas. Do you guys like the imagine/preference format? I'll keep doing these if you do.
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Mark -
• You waited for after his birthday live stream to celebrate with him.
• You did give him a few small gifts throughout the day though.
• You made him a nice dinner with many of his favorite foods, he was extremely thankful.
• You gave him the rest of his gifts after dinner.
• You ended the day with cuddling through the night.
• He loved his birthday and loves you for making him feel special.
• "Thank you for all of this, babe, I loved it. I love you."
Darkiplier -
• The man doesn't usually care about his birthday but you wanted to do something for him.
• You knew he probably wouldn't want to make a big deal of it so you did something small.
• You set up a movie night for the two of you.
• You already chose a movie, it was one of his favorites so you knew he's like it.
• He wasn't expecting to leave his office and be attacked by hugs and happy birthday wishes.
• Dark was touched by the gesture.
• You two watched the movie, ate snacks, and cuddled.
• Safe to say, Dark enjoyed his birthday.
• "I've never cared much for birthdays, but maybe I won't mind them now that I'm with you, Flower."
Wilford -
• Time doesn't really apply to Wilford anymore but he still loves his birthday.
• You took him to a carnival that happened to be in town on his birthday.
• He was very excited, like a little kid when they they're told they're going to Disney for the first time.
• You won him one of those giant teddy bears but this one had a pink mustache, so he obviously had to have it.
• You two had a moment at the top of the Ferris Wheel, you kissed and fireworks went off behind you (cliché but cute).
• He couldn't be happier about how his birthday went, the best gift was you just being in his life.
• "My dear, thank you so much for today. Tonight, I shall guarantee cuddles! Mr.Mittens the Bear is included."
Yancy -
• This is going to be him being on parole.
• After being in prison for so many years, Yancy usually likes more minimalist birthdays.
• Buuuuuuuuut, since he's newly on parole, you're taking him to a show!
• More specifically, you're taking him to see the musical 'Heathers'.
• He was so excited and wouldn't stop talking about it after you bought the tickets.
• The day you guys saw it he fell more in love with theatre.
• He's so thankful for you giving him new experiences now that he's out of prison and loves you more everyday.
• "Thank youse so much for bringing me! You're so amazing, 🎶you're the one I choose~🎶."
Illinois -
• Since you and Illinois are usually adventuring, you usually don't do much on birthdays.
• Usually, you get him a small gift from whatever town you're close to at the time (if any) and cook a nice meal for the both of you with your limited tools.
• Every year you feel bad that you can't do more for him but he always silences those thoughts by showing how appreciative he is that you're even there.
• He loves you dearly and always makes sure you know that he cherishes everything about you, despite you not being able to do or get much for him on birthdays.
• You do make sure to cuddle and talk under the stars every year, if you can.
• "These stars sure are lovely, but they could never compare to you, my love."
Engineer Mark -
• Being the captain and head engineer, you both tend to be busy but when your birthdays come around everything gets dropped to send time with each other... unless it was super important of course.
• One of your gifts for him is usually a mug with some cheesy saying on it, the first one said '# 1 Head Engineer', who knew Hallmark could be so spot on right?
• Since you're both on the ship and with the crew 99% of the time, you get the others to help you throw a big party in the Cockpit.
• Even Celci helped out, despite her and Mark's rivalry!
• He's extremely thankful for you loving motivating him to keep going, you doing so much for him on his birthday fuels that.
• "Captain... thank you. Not just for believing in me but for loving me. It... it means more than you know."
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twinleafteaa · 4 months
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🔅⚔️The Smile of a Thousand suns⚔️🔅
Zolu Fanfic (Zoro X Luffy)
🎶🗡️Chapter 5: Zoro, Zoro, Zoro and The Sandai Kitestsu 🗡️🎶
“ZORO!” Luffy yelled at the top of his lungs.
It was early morning. So early in fact the sun was yet to rise - well… that wasn’t exactly true. The air was sharp as it danced through the gaps of the cabin doors and prison cell bars. The two marines on guard had left to let the two sleep, although two night shift marines had been stationed outside.
“ZORO WAKE UP!” Luffy belted. It wasn’t a yell of fear or anger - it was one of enthusiasm?
“SHUT IT WILL YOU!” One of the marines stationed outside yelled as he opened the door and scowled at luffy. In reply Luffy made a face back which pissed off the marine enough for him to slam the door shut.
“What’s all the yelling for?” Zoro groaned as he was disturbed.
“Zoro! Zoro! Zoro!” Luffy beamed loudly as he crouched down to zoros level
“What’s wrong? Why were you yelling?”
“Well I wanted you up!”
“Why? What time even is it?”
Luffy stood back up and looked over to the door.
“Well from what I saw just now it seems super early.” He nodded. “The sky was dark and cold outside.”
“If it’s that early why the hell did you wake me up!?” Zoro growled.
“Like I said - I want you up.” Luffy said bluntly.
“What for? Can’t you just go back to sleep?”
“Nope!” Luffy smiled before looking straight ahead.
Zoro groaned before flopping his body on the floor. Stupid Luffy.
The raven haired boy took a deep breath in before he started singing ever so loudly.
Luffy liked to sing a lot - although the question on weather or not it was very good was debatable. Zoro did enjoy the happiness that emanated from luffy when he sang weather it was Bink’s brew or some silly song he made up with chopper - the smile that would appear on his captains face was one of magic.
In awe, zoro couldn’t help but look up at Luffy, standing so proud as he sang so loudly.
“Do you mind?” Zoro smirked as he stood up as well.
“They can’t execute us if they’re all exhausted!” Luffy laughed so brightly. That wasn’t exactly how it worked but pissing of the marines In anyway they could made zoro smile too.
And so, the strong swordsman joined in. If this was going to be his last night alive he better make it a good one.
For hours, the two sang and danced - although separated, they we’re together.
It was magical.
All of sudden, the door to the prison slammed open
“I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP!” The Same marine from earlier snapped before storming inside and pointing the shotgun at luffy.
“Yeah I know I heard you the first time - no need to shout.” Luffy grinned. The marine gritted his teeth before sharply aiming the gun at luffys thigh and shooting.
In response, Luffy slapped his hands to his leg where he had been shot. He stumbled back and let out a pained scream.
“I-I didn’t think you were gonna actually do it! Luffy cried out.
“Heh- that’ll teach you to shut up.” The Marine smiled at himself.”
“Tch~ yeah okay.” Luffy rolled his eyes before he pulled his hands away from his thigh, causing the bullet to be shot back and at the marine - right in his leg too. The marine let out a scream filled with both pain and anger. He dropped his gun before grabbing his leg.
“I can’t wait till they kill you.” The marine stammered.
“You really think they could even put a scratch on me?” Luffy laughed with confidence. Zoro reached down and grabbed the gun.
“What’s going on in here-“ another marine burst through into the prison quarters.
“Get out - or I’ll shoot.” Zoro threatened, aiming the gun at the marine who had just run in.
“Do you even know how to use that thing?” Luffy asked.
Without warning, zoro shot the gun, the bullet hitting the door, even the sound was enough to make the marines shudder.
“Did you mean to do that?” Luffy tilted his head.
“O-OF COURSE DUMBASS!” Zoro growled.
The marines quivered in fear before scrambling out of the prison quarters and slamming the door shut. Luffy let out a tremendous laugh before falling to the floor with a big smile on his face.
“What’s so funny?”
“They looked so scared haha! I wonder what they’re faces will be once we break out!” Luffy cackled.
“You got a plan to break out?” Zoro asked as he leaned the gun against the back wall before Sitting down.
Luffy looked down before pressing the soles of his sandals together. He presses his lips together before his eyes shifted to his first crew mate.
“I havnty exactly thought of one yet…” he admitted.
“I mean, I am always the one to get you out of trouble.” Zoro smiled to himself. Luffy opened his mouth as if to objects but the more he thought about it - zoro was right.
“I thought once they drag us off the ship that’s when we’d make our escape- you know how we always do.” Luffy nodded
“I know one of the marines has my swords - I’ll need them to get you free.”
“What so I’m just supposed stay like this while I wait?!”
“You better not complain- or you’re gonna stay like that-“ zoro growled playfully.
“Oh you’d like that huh!?” Luffy pouted
Zoro’s face flushed with red. It was obvious Luffy has energy to burn and it seemed the only way he could let it out was by teasing and pestering.
“You think of I ask the marines nicely they’ll take this sea prism stone off me?” Luffy pondered starting to sway side to side.
“You basically just shot one them in the leg…when then come to drag us out of here I’m sure they’ll shove you in some sort of cage.”
“Well you better stop them!”
“Maybe I will, maybe I won’t.”
“YOU WILL! THATS AN ORDER!”
The two continued to chat away - talking non stop as the sun rose outside. Their laughter was so loud I it disturbed the marines for the rest of the morning.
Sat next to each other as close as they could, Luffy and zoro were lost in each others conversations to pass the time.
“Luffy? Your leg?” Zoro noticed a deep bruise where luffy had been shot, only being revealed by the small tear in his shorts.
“Huh?” Luffys expression dropped to a confused one - although he quickly found what had caught Zoros attention. The raven haired boy looked intently at the deep mark - he hadn’t seen bruises like that in so long…
“Times up you two!” A booming voice yelled before the prison quarters door was slammed open again - honestly this door was taking quite a beating. It was the head of the marine fleet. He was a large guy, his face was obscured by his hat, like the other captains or admirals the two had encountered before, he wore a large coat although his physical appearance wasn’t anything too special.
Luffy’s head flicked up as he was startled, zoro got up and grabbed the gun that was next to him before aiming it.
“You touch him and you’re dead.” Zoro threatened. In seconds, the head of the fleet reached into zoro’s cell, grabbing the gun before yanking is back, slamming zoro against the prison bars. Luffy jumped up and gritted his teeth in anger.
“You’ve been such a pain in our ass - your send off will truly be satisfying!” The large man bellowed. Zoro stumbled back, holding his head. He could feel luffys worried eyes starting at him.
Luffy was about to bite back but zoro’s intimidating glare back was enough to shut him up.
The head of the marines fleet called in a group of marine soldiers and ordered them to escort the two off the ship. The marines did as they told, unlocking the cells and grabbing both Luffy and zoro, with two marines either side.
“Wow you guys look exhausted.” Luffy pouted.
“Get him out of here.” The head of the ship growled. The marine soldiers shared the same annoyed expression before Luffy was dragged out onto the ships deck. “Hey! Let go of me! I can walk by myself you know!” Zoro could hear his captain complain from outside.
“Heh…that brat has no idea what he’s got himself into.” The large imposing man grinned.
“You won’t kill him and I will make sure you regret you even tried.” Zoro snarled as the marines beside him held him back from lunging.
“We won’t kill him just yet - we have to make him suffer first.”
“I request just one thing as a final wish.”
“Catching on I see haha!”
“If I must die first - kill me with my own sword.” Zoro bowed.
There was one sword he had in mind. If he were to die here, if he were to fail the only blade he’d accept dying by here…
Was the Sandai Kitestsu.
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cleoselene · 10 months
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🎶✨️when u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, publish. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers ✨
oh yay thanks for sending me this one, I loooove music asks!
gonna pick the songs that are my current obsessions. I definitely go through phases with songs.
Tori Amos - Bang
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2018's Native Invader was an album I 100% slept on (mostly because someone who is now an ex-friend really hated it and heard it before me and told me how much it sucked and like the loser follower I tend to be, I took her word for it and only gave the album a cursory listen) and now I am discovering how fucking brilliant it is. Tori has 17 original studio albums, Native Invader is #16, and long past the point when her annoying "fans" claimed she'd lost her touch. But they're wrong. She is still vividly creating even while turning 60 next month -- at this point so many musicians have stopped writing and just go tour the hits. We are BLESSED as fans of hers that she is so prolific. Another way in which she reminds me of Taylor -- both of them seem to have this compulsion to be constantly creating music and have scores of unpublished songs because like, writing songs is what I imagine both of these ladies do with like 90% of their time. Native Invader is a politically-charged album, written in the wake of Trump's election, and "Bang" is about the violent hatred Trump and his election fostered against immigrants. It's really powerful and structured gorgeously. Getting this album on vinyl changed everything for me, because vinyl really allows the instrumentation to shine.
hahaha I'm rambly so putting the other four behind a cut. HOPE YOU DON'T REGRET INVITING ME TO WAX POETIC ABOUT MUSIC
2. Taylor Swift - Maroon
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I have been living a Maroon Appreciation Life since October 21, 2022. This is more or less tied for me as the best song that Taylor has written with Jack (tied with Getaway Car for me) and I really wish had been put in the main Eras setlist, because I think the full instrumentation and staging and costuming and lighting for a Maroon performance would have been just 🔥🔥🔥
It is, much to my surprise, my actual favorite song on Midnights. And this surprises me because i am SUCH a ho for when Taylor writes with Aaron Dessner, and don't get me wrong, the Dessner tracks on Midnights on my favorite. It's the Dessner collabs and Maroon that MAKE this album iconic for me. I don't love the production on all of the songs, but the production on Maroon is just PERFECT. It's lush, it's got that sadgirl dance music vibe that I live for. Mark Ronson has a sadgirl dance album called Late Night Feelings that I'm a huge fan of and Maroon reminds me of a track from that album. Just, this smooth electronic vibe that would play well in a club but also plays well as sitting in your room alone wallowing in sad music. Is it my favorite Taylor song of all of them? No, that's still ivy, but Maroon is in the top tier. Like, if all the songs on Midnights are drowning and I can only save one, I'm saving Maroon. That's a real fuckin' legacy.
3. Garth Brooks - Much Too Young (To Feel This Damn Old)
goddammit Garth, i can't drop a youtube or even a spotify link to this one because of your dumb exclusivity contracts. that being said, I recently switched from spotify to amazon music (bought a vinyl from amazon, they gave me 3 free months of amazon music as a gift, and well, why pay 12 bucks a month for spotify when I'm getting it for free from amazon music? And even after the three months it only goes up to like 8 dollars or something, AND, it's Garth Brooks' exclusive streaming platform. SO NOW I CAN LISTEN TO GARTH AGAIN.
My favorite thing about Garth (aside from his music, which is just excellent and classic and such beautifully crafted classic Americana) is that every few years the ignorant conservative segment of the country music fanbase re-discovers anew that Garth is, in fact, as the Fox News pundits say while clutching pearls, "woke." They need to be reminded that he wrote "We Shall Be Free" all the way back in 1990 with lyrics that very explicitly praise racial diversity and support queer people.
At the moment the dummies are mad because Garth won't stop serving Bud Light in his bar, has said transphobes are not welcome, and his reaction to conservatives putting down DEI programs is to say "Diversity and inclusion are what I am all about," essentially. Garth is old school country in the vein of Willie and Dolly and Emmylou and Loretta, just younger, sneaking in at the tail end of the old school outlaw country when it was less about the sort of conservative shit-kickin that emerged in the 90-now and you had Willie Nelson doing Farm Aid and Dolly Parton giving books to all the kids in her state, and Johnny Cash singing for prisoners. Garth is so much more alike that crew even if they're not his generation, than he is with buffoons like Travis Tritt who were his actual contemporaries He's always been a real ally, his sister is a lesbian and let me tell you, as an 11 year old daughter of a lesbian in 1990 when a guy like Garth is singing GAY RIGHTS while you live in the pseudo-South of Florida? Big fuckin deal.
On top of that, his music's just gorgeous. Romantic in all the senses of the word. Conveying yearning in ways that make my chest ache. This song has resonated with me all my life, honestly, I've always felt older than my years, but especially now that I'm a sick person. It makes me cry.
Like my ultimate ultimate dream for Taylor Swift (Taylor's Version) is for one of her collabs on a vault track to be with Garth Brooks, because they are really respectively the biggest country stars of their generations, achieving that huge GLOBAL success that pulls in people who aren't even a fan of the country genre, simply by writing music that really appeals to people's hearts and souls. I love when I can tell a songwriter is a hopeless romantic, and Garth definitely is. There's a vulnerability and tenderness to his ballads especially.
4. Tori Amos - Digital Ghost
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there's a lot of theories as to who this song is about, but I really honestly don't care about any of them. Tori songs are poetry more than lyrics, meant to be open to multiple interpretations, and really, no interpretation is necessarily right or wrong. Tori herself says this: she says that when she puts a song out into the world, it no longer belongs to her, and it becomes something different to every listener. She's talked about meeting fans who gush about a song and what it meant to them, and sometimes she's like, "yeah, absolutely, i was thinking the same thing too," but very often her reaction was also "huh. well. if that's how you see it, I'm glad it's useful to you!" She has acknowledged a lot of fans get meaning from her song that were never a part of her meaning, but she also acknowledges that it doesn't make the fans' meaning of a song less valid. Music is like that.
So do I really know what this song is about, specifically, or who? I've read the theories it's about Trent Reznor, a piece in conversation with NIN's Year Zero album, but idk about all of that. Could be true, could be bullshit. To me? The lyrics feel like Tori is singing TO me. I feel like the Digital Ghost. Actually really considered changing my tumblr url to some version of "digital ghost" that is available, but i hate changing my url because I get so confused when other people do it, hahah, but it's like. She sings of reaching out to someone, someone who seems more comfortable communicating with the world through the internet, through technology:
It started as a joke Just one of my lucks to see If somehow I could reach you So I swam onto your shores Through an open window Only to find you all alone Curled up with machines
and the song goes on to discuss the concept of a person fading away, becoming a ghost of a person more comfortable with machines than with flesh and blood people. It resonates for me on multiple levels. As an introvert, I do like to spend a lot of time alone with my machines. As someone whose dearest friends don't live geographically close, my machines allow me to have any communication at all with my loved ones. I spend so much of my time these days, with my stressed out, unhealthy MS and migraine brain, exhausted beyond belief by a trip to the grocery store, on low-dose chemo with a threadbare immune system so even if i wanted to go out more, it's literally not safe. So I don't go out to dinner and i don't go to baseball games as much and i get walmart grocery pick up so i don't have to walk around a store full of germs. Honestly a very very large part of the reason I sold my Eras tickets was because the thought of being around 80k people legit terrified me on a mental and physical level. It sucks. I wasn't always like this. But MS changed my life forever, and then Covid just magnified it all. I don't know that I'll ever be able to enjoy things like going out to eat anymore. I've always wanted to go on a cruise; now you couldn't pay me, I know I'd get so sick.
So i feel like a Digital Ghost. Curled up with my record player and my computer and my smart TV because they're safer, and the me I was has been fading away for some time now. I'm sounding more emo than I feel, hahah, because honestly sad songs are very therapeutic for me and help me process my own pain. Digital Ghost for me right now is helping me process something heavy, and for the umpteenth time in my life, I feel like Tori is my big sister holding my hand and helping me navigate this wild ride that is womanhood. And I find the achingly sad songs very comforting and cathartic. It's actually often really peppy songs that irritate me lol /is goth
5. Peter Murphy - I'll Fall With Your Knife
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So. This is actually my favorite song of all time by anyone, and it has been for 25 years now. When I was 18 and had just moved out of the house and was a sweet little babygoth, I lived in Tampa and clubbed goth-style in Ybor City 4-5 nights a week. Get all gothed up from head to do and go dancing to dramatic and sad gothic/industrial and seeing more boys in dresses than an episode of RuPaul's Drag Race. It was my ritual, it was my church, it was my identity for several years. Putting on the costume (because well, it was. I'm a t-shirt and jeans and no-makeup person naturally. Putting on long black skirts and wearing corset tops and fishnets on my arms and caking on loads of make-up and shaping part of my hair into demonic horns made of coiled up braids while wearing my steel-toed Dr. Martens was a lot of stuff do to in order to get ready. I am not a prissy person by nature so spending an hour to doll up is something I find to be a choice honestly, but I thought the style was pretty and I LOVED the music.
Dancing was my favorite part. South Park's depiction of goth dancing is inaccurate and stupid, lol, and it's hard to explain, but it's prettier than that. And it's also a solo dance. You don't dance with other people, you're not grinding or leading someone else. You're connecting with the music on a pure level and it's about that musical connection, not about looking cute or hooking up. That being said, there was this guy who would dance at the club to all the same songs I liked to dance to and I thought he was sexy as hell. Should have realized a good dancer who is also a guy would be gay as the day is long, but Patrick and I became good friends after my thirsty hopes were crushed. Turns out, he had spent the same couple of months thinking I was a good dancer, too! On a platonic level, haha, because he was very much gay, but I liked that we were drawn to each other by something as human and joyous as dancing.
This song. This was the song that had Patrick and me dropping our drinks and bolting for the dance floor the second we heard the first opening note. It was OUR song. And we didn't dance with each other, because again: goth dancing is a solo venture. But we danced next to each other so many times and sang at the top of our lungs together, and never more so than to I'll Fall With Your Knife.
It's just a quintessential goth song. Forget Marilyn Manson, even back in 1996 I knew he was a poser making shit music and trying to pass it off as goth when it was just dumb shock rock that had none of the soul and spirit of real gothic/industrial, and also, tbh, was extremely derivative to the point of being plagiaristic. He was doing exactly what Skinny Puppy had been doing for decades, only Puppy did it much better and with less rape obsession. Brian Warner is a pervert obsessed with Nazis and subjugating and abusing women. Skinny Puppy was a band called that because they're sensitive dudes who love animals and their pet cause (no pun intended) is to stop animal experimentation, specifically vivisection. It makes me sad and angry that the world thinks of Brian fucking Warner as representative of the goths and industrial music, because gothic/industrial is a counterculture genre that challenges oppression. There's a reason Trent Reznor almost immediately regretted knowing the asshole.
But Peter Murphy? The lead singer of Bauhaus? Writing this achingly romantic song about love, goth style? This is what pulled the goth kids to the dance floor. And when it was played at full blast in the big club speakers it was just beyond beautiful. The flood does indeed wash all over you.
Well, if the birds can reach the sky To this land, I'll be with you 'Til the sun bursts from your side With my hands I reach to you Well, you think your chance is passing by Well, you blow your moon away I'll bleed like the reed Fall with your knife It's here, I'll be with you
fucking beautiful words. romance so lovely and scarlet and joyously melancholy.
Incidentally, there is another artist who I absolutely adore who also claims this as their favorite song of all time: Sarah McLachlan. She's a brilliant musician so that makes me feel like i got taste that we have the same favorite song ever lol
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hyunpic · 2 years
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