#they shouldn't be alone

[redysetdare]

I think i just need to express that the culture surrounding QPRs right now made me think that i couldn't have strong bonds with my friends. Society told me i cant have strong bonds with friends because that was only for romantic relationships. Then i went into aro spaces and this idea was reinforced using QPRs instead of romantic relationships. it was "You can still have strong bonds with people without romance! It can just be a QPR instead!" "QPRs are MORE than friendship so you can have STRONGER BONDS than you would with friends."

it made me think that the relationships i wanted with my friends HAD to be something other than friendship for it to be as strong as i wanted. If i wanted to be the first person in someones life i had to enter some sort of committed relationship. if I wanted someone to care about me as strongly as i did them then it would have to be a relationship that was "more" than friendship.

I thought I wanted a QPR because i was told the only way to get that care and security that I wanted was to enter into a relationship that was "more" than friendship. because friends didn't care that much. because friends didn't live together their entire lives. because friends were never the priority relationship wise. and it took me years to realize that i didn't want any partnership and i shouldn't have to be in one to want these things from a friend. these things CAN be something friends can do. but i found that out on my own. because the aro community kept saying "you want a QPR" when i just wanted a friend who finally saw me as a priority in their life.

#text #personal #aro #aromantic #aroace #aspec #qpr #queerplatonic relationships #queer platonic relationships #tbh i was around when qprs were still getting footing. ppl werent sure how to properly label them #so to avoid allos saying it's just friends the common response was 'its more than friends but less than romance' #as if they were trying to justify it's existence as if we had to have a equivalent to romance to be justified in our identities and as ppl #because being aro made you not be a person. because how can you be a person if you dont love or have a partner #because being aro was sad because being aro meant ou were alone and you shouldn't want to be alone!! #and these ideas made it so that amatonormativity was just reinforced in aro spaces #and it isn't until recent years when amatonormativity started getting used top put a name to the problem #that i really saw ppl start standing up for aros who didnt partner because why are we expected to partner anyways? #shouldnt ppl be whole as they are? #and this is only my experience im not saying this happens everywhere #but this is why i think we need to have a conversation about QPRs and how they are used in aro spaces #because im not the only one who struggled through this #my experience may not be universal but my experience has happened to others #and thats worth talking about #srry im having a lot of thoughts recently

[scificrows]

Okay, my brain refuses to think about anything other than Murderbot, so I looked at every use of the word "friend[s]" in TMBD and... created some pie charts. Normal human activities.

Some Thoughts™ I had while putting this together (under the cut):

In All Systems Red, Murderbot notes that the PresAux crew are all close friends (twice! and goes on to explain their internal relationships which I think is very cute). This is pretty much the only use of 'friends' in ASR, except for when Murderbot says that SecUnits can't be friends with each other.

It seems that this may be one of the first times Murderbot has ever really been around a group of friends before? Murderbot notes that this is not the norm for its contracts and admits that the fact that they are all friends and the way they interact with each other make it actually enjoy that contract (before!!!! the hostile attack, so it already enjoys this contract before they start seeing it as a person etc ghghhhh). [Inference: Friendship seems enjoyable.]

The first character that calls Murderbot its friend is ART in Artificial Condition. Murderbot immediately refutes this (and then goes on to call ART its friend to its clients for the rest of the book). [Inference: Maybe ART is Murderbot's friend. And maybe that is... agreeable]

Rogue Protocol has more than twice as many instances of the word 'friend' as any of the other novellas. Why? Miki. Friendship and its implications for non-humans are a central theme because Miki is friends with everyone. Murderbot initially scoffs at the notion that Miki and Miki's humans are friends. At the end of the book, after witnessing how desperately Don Abene tried to stop Miki from trying to save them, and her grief after its death, Murderbot has to admit that she had in fact been Miki's friend. [Inference: Humans can be friends with bots and can sincerely care about them]

In Exit Strategy, Murderbot tentatively uses the word "friends" for its humans for the first time (several times actually). It questions whether it can actually call them its friends or not and later realizes that it had been afraid what admitting that the humans are its friends would do to it. At the end of the book, Mensah tells Murderbot the PresAux crew are its friends, which is the first time a human has directly said that to it (at least on-page). [Inference: Humans can and want to be Murderbot's friends]

In Network Effect, Murderbot seems to be more habituated to the word 'friend', confidently calling ART and Ratthi its friends, like it is no longer just trying the concept on unsure if it fits. There are many instances in which other characters refer to MB as ART's friend or the other way around and Murderbot's humans refer to Murderbot as their friend several times. Generally, there seems to be less hesitancy, because yes, all of them are Murderbot's friends, why wouldn't they be. [Inference: SecUnits can have friends. This SecUnit has friends. They care about it a lot.]

Conclusion: The Murderbot Diaries tell the story of a construct that does not seem to consider the possibility of friendship for itself and is fine with that - until it accidentally starts caring a little too much and suddenly more and more people annex it as a friend (ew) to the point where it can no longer deny that this is happening and has to begrudgingly admit that yes, it has friends now and maybe that is actually not a bad thing.

#the murderbot diaries #murderbot #𓄿 #hi i'm READY to write a thesis about murderbot i am having way too much fun with this #i created a pretty excel spreadsheet and everything #i don't know why i did this but now i can look at them while i think about this more! so i figured i'd share them haha #i didn't count uses of 'friendly' but special shoutout to when MB is all alone in its cold cubicle missing 20% of its body mass #and starts putting on a show because 'the friendly noise would keep it company' 😭😭 #i feel sick thinking about murderbot all alone on its own not knowing what its like to have friends watching media for 'the friendly noise' #also YES okay i wanted to make a point about miki there but i just #couldn't bring myself to talk about that more so... yeah #also uhhh this data is very subjective #i didn't count particularly ironic uses of 'friend' and generally did not count every instance of friend and sometimes it was a hard call #also i probably shouldn't have counted the times murderbot refered to drones or secsystems as its friends (often after hacking them) #but murderbot does seem to care about them and shows kindness and respect and sometimes points out that a system is friendly #so while i don't think MB means “friend” in the same way referring to them as when it refers to ART for instance #i still think its CUTE and also kinda funny how many times that happened so i decided to keep those!!! #but yeah take my data with a grain of salt lol

[flowers-of-buffoonery]

chuuya:

chuuya, a couple minutes later:

#where do I even begin #imagine hating a person so much you become this obsessed with them #hating someone to the point that you claim them #to the point that you see their life as yours to end and yours alone #you hate them you hate them you hate them #they're yours to hate and hurt #they're not allowed to let someone else hurt or kill them #and the moment they DO get hurt and it wasn't you who did it... #...it's all wrong - isn't it? #it shouldn't be possible for someone else to touch them let alone hurt them #they're yours yours yours #anyway. soukoku brainrot going strong #bungou stray dogs #bsd manga #vol. 8 #soukoku #skk #dazai #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #chuuya #bsd chuuya #nakahara chuuya #bsd meta

[carlyraejepsans]

I think the whole “Toriel is like a mother to sans” is people not understanding that Toriel being motherly to Frisk doesn’t make her default state mother mode. I think most people would probably act like a parent or older sibling if they found a child that needed help. You can’t just go up to a kid and sat “you’re going to die if you leave this tiny area and you can’t go home ever”

Toriel mother ask person. I think I sent my ask without my finishing it sorry. Anyway I was saying.

Also her dialogue with everyone at the end of the pacifist route is basically just proof that she’s not motherly 100% of the time (especially with sans). People really love to exaggerate her motherlyness towards other characters

yeah it's almost like her entire character arc in their friendship is finally finding someone she can meet on the same level and be vulnerable with, knowing they can lean on one another and care for each other as equals. whodathunk!

#almost like forcing herself to be a stoic authority who does the right thing and protects those beneath her no matter how much it pains her #is actually a very unhealthy habit for her that's caused unbelievable grief and loneliness #almost like she SHOULDN'T have taken that burden on her shoulders alone #hmmmm #answered asks #biscia hater moment

[kiyterra]

About the Civilian Bruce AU, have there been any cases of Bruce being this close to discovering his kids being vigilantes, and them coming up with the most absurd explanations/distractions?

jason's excuse was "i've never heard of that name in my life, actually i don't even know what names are, k bye"

#thank youuu for the prompt i sWEAR I HAD SOMETHING HAPPIER IN MIND #but dw i will draw that too. soon #i hope #but anyway bruce is shook but red hood is already gone and he has to deal with this alone #cause what is he going to say? who is he going to tell? alfred who misses and mourns jason just as much as he does? #his kids who shouldn't be reminded of their grief just because their paranoid guardian saw a ghost? #so he just. suffers :)))) #ENJOY YALL #terra art #bruce wayne #red hood #jason todd #batfam #dc #civilian bruce au

[still-the-river-flows]

one of my favourite plot details in Stargate SG1 is that they have a Veteran traumatized bc his son killed himself with his own gun, a brilliant scientist/soldier who is good at nearly everyting who is traumatized bc she was taken control of by a Tok'ra against her will, an alien warrior who spent a lifetime slaughtering innocents and fighting for a tyrant and whose people remain slaves of that tyrant or others like him. And a wife guy with no combat training.

The wife guy is the most ruthless of them all by far it just doesn't come up much bc most of their situations don't involve his wife.

#stargate sg1 #stargate #the system Lords: maybe we should have left the Tau'ri alone #Lord Yu (his third eye open): maybe apophis shouldn't have kidnapped that guy's wife

[uncanny-tranny]

This is purely speculation on my end, but I've noticed that it seems like people (specifically younger queer people, partially under forty) are so used to queerphobes indignantly saying, "you have the right to marry, what more can you want?! Why do you shove it down our throats?!" that they internalize the idea that gay marriage and other rights were only fought for for queer assimilation.

The push for things like gay marriage wasn't just "to assimilate," and especially after the AIDs crisis, you very well could watch your lover or friend or mentor die in front of you and have no recourse. No protections. No guarantee that you could even say goodbye. Learning that - as a young queer myself - hammered home how important these things can be. To get where we are now didn't happen because of the magical benevolence of the cishets. We fought for that shit. We died for that shit.

Again, this is speculation, but I don't think young queers (even me) will truly understand the scope of queer history. It takes effort to learn about this, but it is an effort worth pursuing every single time. At the least, we owe it to honour the people who came before us who have sacrificed so much. We owe our communities that much, at least.

#queer #lgbt #lgbtq #politics #it just irks me to see the 'why werent queers of the past trying to move to reprioritize marriage 🙄' #it gives off the same vibes as 'why transition? shouldn't you abolish gender altogether🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄. hashtag owned!' #it's just...please learn about history. even the aids crisis ALONE was harrowing to learn - but it's so important #i don't see assimilation as what you do per se but rather what you believe in #queer assimilation isn't getting married and having kids - it's (to me) an attitude of queerness #it's devaluing queerness and thinking of it as lesser - so you will distance yourself intrinsically from it #maybe that's the same to some people but i don't see it that way #and even then the conversion of this alone is nuanced and complicated #instead of blaming an individual i tend to blame the systems in place that lead people to devaluing themselves and who they are

[genericpuff]

In which Persephone is told she can't game the system- (TEXT EDIT)

no art was edited here, just text to make this more realistic to how this scene WOULD have gone if it was an actual courtroom with real rules LOL I find it a little weird that Rachel wrote a courtroom drama arc like this and then twisted it this much to benefit Persephone because like... clearly she was inspired by courtroom drama shows, and I can't help but wonder if she got all of her basic courtroom knowledge from like, Spongebob or some shit LOL

#it literally could have been a forum or something a little more #idk #GREEK ??? #get tf outta here persephone #choosing your own boyfriend as your attorney #he shouldn't even be a judge on this case let alone an attorney #wtf was zeus thinking #where the FUCK is athena #athena would never let this happen #this edit means a lot to me because the trial arc was basically my canon event where I started to doubt LO and Rachel #like i had had so much suspension of disbelief up until persephone chose hades to be her attorney LOL #and then the eris twist was the last straw #lo critical #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #antiloreolympus

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 116

Give Battinson robins but it’s DCxDP style with ghosts. 

His kids are… technically not from his world and technically not alive either, but that doesn’t stop him from adopting them. Even if he wasn’t aware of them being literal ghosts for the first few hours of encountering them. 

How did they get here? Well, you see, sometimes child ghosts will run into each other, and they’ll form their own little friend groups. Or family groups. Especially if they lack a guardian. Who would tell them not to mess with natural portals. 

Or to kidnap a phantom to play with them, but hey he’s enjoying himself too and has a puppy! The bestest boy!

Bruce was not prepared for some sort of energy-thing to open and spit out a good half a dozen children. Nor was he prepared for these children to all have powers, or for another child (thankfully a teen) to fall into the cave a few weeks later. 

#dcxdp #dpxdc #battinson #prompts #Dick died alongside his parents when the line snapped #Barbara died to the mob when her father refused to be bribed #Jason died out in the cold on the streets after surviving for a year #Cass died after escaping her father- training for killing doesn’t always translate to training for survival #Tim died from neglect alone in his parents’ home while it was covered up #Steph died before her mother tried to get help with her addictions #Duke died from an attack in the narrows #Damian died from a ‘trainer’ who wanted revenge against Talia & Ras #Danny was searching for his ghost friends with Cujo's help but tripped #It all worked out though #Bruce sobbing to Alfred: Why are there so many hurt children #Bruce grabbing all of them including Danny: My children now #He gets horrifyingly good at picking up stealth what with his kids being literal ghosts #Gets a bit of a mom sense for whenever they're doing something they shouldn't #Some idiot: I shall kill the Robins! #Batman: #Y'know what the robins deserve star cores #with big bro space core danny #god can you imagine if battinson became liminal lol

[hellenhighwater]

So uhhhhh there's a series of bloodstains near my back door that wasn't there before I went camping and neither of the cats have any injuries

Did Malice and Vice have to repel intruders while I was gone????

#tw blood #blood #cw blood #and yes I'm sure it's blood #there's a whole little trail of it #this is why i shouldn't leave them alone #I'm gone for a few days and they turn to murder #typical.

[lilith-91]

I will defend this kid with my life, his haters will burn in hell

Imagine hating this poor kid over a fanon ship fuck off weirdos 😭

#avatar the last airbender #aang #katara #atla #people who hate aang shouldn't be allowed to watch atla #weirdos #leave him alone #ko**a stans also are obnoxious these days #i'm so tired of this powerscaling bs discourse

[danwhobrowses]

It shouldn't need to be said but I'm seeing a lot of vitriol towards Ashton about their actions and I have to say I don't agree with them.

At the clock tower Fearne brought up the shard, stated that in her opinion Ashton should take the shard because she didn't want it. Ashton decided then as a result they'd take it, but because it was an extreme risk made very aware to them all they knew the other Hells wouldn't allow them to go through with it. Ashton asked Fearne if she was okay with both of them going together alone with the plan, reiterating that they didn't want to put this on Fearne, that if they died Fearne would not be to blame, and that they have no intention of dying, and Fearne said yes.

Fearne having second thoughts at the Ziggurat was just worry, because she cares deeply for Ashton, Ashton kissing her was not manipulation either; it was letting go of fear, having no regret with the person they also care deeply for and taking the risk. And yeah, it was frightening, 10 rounds of perpetual fiery near-death situations and one actual death situation; Laura is fuming, Ashley cannot look, Liam is playing Mad World on loop in his mind, even Matt is completely on edge, but they survived. Accusations that Ashton manipulated Fearne to selfishly take the shard seem to misinterpret the shard saga as well as Fearne and Ashton's characters, they will get a very intense amount of chastising for sure, but it will be out of love, out of the fear that they were going to lose them, not because they thought Ash was manipulative.

#critical role #bells hells #ashton greymoore #taliesin jaffe #fearne calloway #ashley johnson #laura bailey #matt mercer #Ashton literally is comprised of things that shouldn't exist of course they're gonna not heed warnings when Fearne didn't want it #the group are stressed but I don't believe there's heat #if I recall 4sd is aired after an unaired episode so Tal Travis Matt and Ashley were happily vibing from that despite having already played #Tal and Ashley agreed on this gambit they just underestimated how bad it'd go #and I would wager that Tal knew he could lean on the ring to save Ashton at least once #overall no I don't think Ashton intended to manipulate or hurt anyone and in trying to shoulder it alone they were trying to be selfless #but reminder Ashton is 6 charisma they aren't gonna express their intentions too well #the Hells are rightfully so mad for making them worry but in the end they're just gonna be grateful Ashton's alive #also I have to make a point that Fearne said 'I shouldn't have listened to you' not 'I shouldn't have trusted you' there's a big difference #and Tal hasn't tried to wriggle or bargain out of it he's had Ashton accept all frustration because they know it's from a loving place #critical role spoilers #sorry for multiple edits I keep seeing me unconsciously use he/him and I have to fix it plus I have more to say but nobody to say it to

[dilfsuzanneyk]

on one hand i want humphrey to be chill and be the level-headed voice of reason with the ghosts and be included more but also i think he should be allowed to be unhinged. he should bite people's ankles and yell at them from on top of shelves he deserves it

#humphrey bone #he's been left alone so long so why shouldn't he lose it a little #he can still be included i just think he should help the rest cause problems #bbc ghosts #vex rambles

[redysetdare]

Got hit in the face with amatonormativity today when my coworker was talking abt romance with a customer and said "Life is not meant to be spent alone" and in my head I was like... maybe YOU can't be happy alone but I sure am!

And b4 anyone goes commenting this, this was in explicit reference to having a romantic partner. don't come on here being like "but she's right because friendship and family!" you know that's not what this is about.

#text #aro #aromantic #asexual #ace #aroace #aspec #amatonormativity #not only that but maybe... ppl can live full and happy lives without having friends or family? #maybe ppl can be happy truely being alone #not everyone enjoys being around people they shouldn't be shamed for that #also say that to the billions of ppl who live in unhappy marraiges because being alone is treated like the worse option #amatonormativity literally says stay in your toxic/unhappy marraige because being alone is worse LIKE #dont be aphobic on this post or I'll bite you yes even if ur aspec i'll take ur knees #and probably block ur stupid ass lmao #that or I'll put u on blast depends on how i feel

[katich-pigeon]

Wake/Casey (nsfw version on twitter)

#Casey is reading the found pages of the manuscript #trust me guys #Saga shouldn't have left them alone together #The author and his creation have merged #AW2 #alan wake #alex casey #wakesey #caseywake

[hood-ex]

I once read a book where a character who had just one of everything - one fork, one plate, etc. - because he considered more than that just pointless stuff he'd eventually have to move told another that she made him want to have two plates, and that might be the most Dick and Donna vibes I've ever gotten out of anything not actually about Dick and Donna.

Well now I'm thinking about Dick buying two mugs and keeping one for himself and giving the other to Donna as a gift, but Dick's mug eventually burns along with the rest of Dick's apartment during the Blockbuster fiasco, so then after Donna dies and there's a funeral reception at her apartment, Dick finds the twin mug in Donna's kitchen, and he takes it up to the roof with him and cries.

Teen Titans/Outsiders Secret Files

#god that scene is so strong bc everything diana is saying clearly reflects dick's own thoughts and feelings #he feels responsible. he should've protected her. she was his sister. she was his soulmate. #and it KILLS me like nothing else that the other titans are inside talking to each other and remembering donna #but dick is ALONE and he chooses to be alone #and that isolation is so good in the sense that it reflects dick's belief that he shouldn't be on a team. he shouldn't be with family. #he should be alone because if he's alone then he can't be responsible for anyone else dying #and it's like... #after lilith and donna died--tim asked dick what they should do now #and dick swung away from tim and said ''i don't know. but whatever it is--i think we better do it alone.'' #and fuuuuck. dc doesn't do a lot of things right but they sure as hell did This right #dick's darker/colder demeanor. his self-isolation. and all of it pointing toward lilith and donna's deaths #they made sure we knew that he was like this because of that one terrible day and it makes me insaneee #Dick Grayson #Donna Troy #the bestiiiies #anon