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#thinky thoughts
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I am having a lot of thoughts about the Christopher of it all right now in light of this bts we got from Gavin!!!
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Because - Mountains and rock climbers and forests!!!
Look I've already climbed onto the Eddie and mountains to climb train in this post here but I'm about to make it a Diaz boys have mountains to climb train!!!
So Eddie now has a photograph - in black and white - of Half Dome on his bedroom wall - right above his bed
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And then he has a lone cowboy on a horse - on the opposite wall - a cowboy on a horse in a flat landscape (which is yellow/orange - and with the blue walls also therefore plays into yellow blue theory)...
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...and there is just something about Eddie sitting in his bed - looking at a picture of what is essentially a lone ranger in a barren landscape, on a wall that Buck helped him repair, while behind him is this looming mountain that is notoriously difficult to climb - the thing he can see when he is having sex with M - upside down.
The rest is under the cut because being brief is not my wheelhouse!!
Something about playing into the idea that Eddie has been this lone ranger in a barren landscape - searching for something - an something about how that search in this barren landscape is hiding (happening) the holes in the wall that Buck helped him patch up - something about how he feels alone even though the help he needed and wanted is already there - just hidden out of sight.
How that mountain is looming behind him also out of sight. How Eddie is in t his good place right now, but there are still mountains for him to climb - how those mountains are connected to his past.
There is also something in the choice of black and white for the image - something about the thing Eddie needs to deal with - the mountain he needs to climb is black and white - Obvious - not a complex myriad of colour (something something about his catholic guilt being obvious - black and white - something about it being a part of him that is finite and defined and not changeable - something like being gay perhaps!!)
Then there is the fact that we can make a fair assumption, based on the fact that we were shown Buck helping him fix the holes, that Buck helped Eddie with all of the redecorating - that he helped him paint the room (and choose the lovely duck egg blue colour), helped him hang the pictures - helped him choose the artwork for his walls - implicitly tying Buck to that mountain - that his feelings etc tied to Buck are his mountain still to climb. The thing with this as a concept is that it also plays into the upside down on the bed with Marisol - things being wrong or upside down/ backwards with her - that the spectre of Buck looms large over their relationship.
The otehr thiing I'd like to point out is kind of the biggest thing of them all and plays into the two cut lines and red string of fate of it all. Because Half Dome has a permanent cable tether for climbers attempting to summit to use and the metaphor of that is fascinating to me. There is something in the idea of Eddie feeling untethered, but also in Eddie not fully trusting he has a tether. How Eddie still hasn't fully grasped the permanence of Buck in the Diaz family's life - in Eddies life. Eddie needs to scale that mountain and buck is metaphorically speaking the half dome permanent cable run. Eddie might've made him a permanent fixture from a legal perspective - but that was for Chris, not for him (and Chris has already figured out Bucks permanence if you ask me - he already ran to Buck and opens up to him in a way he can’t with his father) but Eddie still doesn’t fully trust that the support he has in his life through Buck is permanent rather than a temporary tether. Eddie is almost there - but not quite - it feels like there is something in Bucks coming out to him that will be the catalyst for him to figure that out (don't ask me what or how - I haven't figured that bit out yet but it has something to do with the whole nothing has changed between us and Eddies dawning realisation of that that gives him his own confidence to make changes in the same way Buck has!)and start his climb so he can explore the mountain (his queerness) safely.
But back to Christophers t-shirt and how it fits into everything. Christopher has his own mountains to climb - dealing with his feelings of being abandoned by his mom - by being abandoned by the women in his life - because we need to remember that Abuela is also now absent from his life as she is now back in Texas. How Ana also left and how we've very much not been shown Carla at all (or had mention on her I think) this season. we can even, by virtue of the relationship Chris and Buck share, include Taylor leaving (being kicked to the curb) as part of the list of women exiting his life in some way.
Bringing up Shannons letter and having Chris read it at the very start of the season, for me is a clear indicator that that is the arc he is going to go through this season - that while there are still elements of the Shannon of it all in Eddies story, it is actually Christopher who needs to let that ghost go and move forward, not Eddie.
911 loves to play with imagery - they excel at it in the Diaz house, and I talk about how the kids costuming on the show is always so deliberately chosen to reflect their arcs, Especially with Chris. So here we have Chris in a t-shirt with mountains, trees and climbers on - setting up the idea of exploring him climbing that mountain he has to climb, but also playing on the idea that he's a bit caught in a forest as well - cannot see the wood for the trees. It a great metaphor for his current abandonment issues - because he is still a bit too young to fully comprehend that some people are not meant to stay in your life in a permanent way or that sometimes, just because they are not physically present in a regular way, doesn't mean they have abandoned you. Hell that is a difficult thing for many adults to comprehend, so to ask a kid to - especially one who's hormones are starting to go crazy - is never going to be practical.
The fact they’ve very deliberately not shown him actually interacting with with Marisol before now - establishing her as existing in Christopher’s world but not actively being a part of it - really ensuring to set her apart and off to the side - apart form establishing the contrast between Shannon and Marisol, is so interesting and feels, to me at least, like it’s building up to possibly playing into some version of the idea of you’re not my mother etc etc. They've taken great care to establish Shannon as Christophers mother - that she is still a major presence in his life, even in her absence.
They're is also something in the way that the idea of Marisol being 'portrayed' (can't think of the right word but I hope you know what I mean) as essentially a babysitter - we've never been shown them interacting - just told that Eddie has been getting her to babysit and in tv show land if you want to tell the audience that two characters have a good relationship (of whatever form) - you show it - you don't allude to that relationship as existing - especially when you are developing a narrative around a child's fear of being abandoned by the women in his life - not showing her looking after Chris before this point, and after you have established said abandonment issue, just reenforces the nature of their relationship - that it is one Chris is not likely to be engaging in - because she's going to leave anyway so what is the point of getting attached.
Now this is interesting because it feeds into Eddies arc rather nicely - its an arc they have already established with the audience - his jumping in too quickly and without thinking things through properly. it also plays back into an already existing arc - the one where he does things for Christopher and not for himself. they are to all intents and purposes the same thing. Eddie lets Shannon back into his life - for Christopher, he re-proposes not for himself, but for Christopher and the second baby he thinks is coming, he starts dating Ana for Christopher not for himself, he Makes Buck Christophers legal guardian for Christopher (even though at this point we don't know if Chris knows this fact), yes a part of that id for himself as well, but it is predominately for Chris. Eddie asking Marisol to move in - almost immediately in the aftermath of Chris revealing to Buck that he feels abandoned by his mom and that is where his multiple girlfriends/ becoming a player is coming from - how it is having an impact on who he is becoming as a person (one who things women leave and therefore treats them as temporary), is Eddie doubling down on his relationship with Marisol as a way of giving Christopher a female who is present. The entire thing - Eddie - in therapy and healing and now in a place where he thinks his issues with Ana and becoming a ready made family etc are 'dealt with' and in the past - hearing Chris talk about Shannon that way and to then have his immediate response be to go one step further than he managed with Ana - to ask M to move in - to essentially create something permanent - the whole going with is gut - despite his own feelings and thoughts on the matter - boils down to him still doing things for Chris’s happiness and not his own feels kind of loud. Because that is what his gut tells him - double down and sacrifice yourself and your own happiness for Christopher.
on the subject of guts - its very clearly a major theme for the Diaz boys this season, the show has been using the Diaz house to great effect already on this front.
Christophers homework that he was doing in episode 1 - all aobut guts
we had him studying blood types and transfusions
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the function of kidneys and the nephron (literal guts!!)
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and then - when he's read Shannons letter - frog dissection - again literally looking at guts
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then from up coming episodes - thanks to Jihanes bts content we know that the fridge has the following charts on it
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All things related to the gut and gut health. something something about Eddies heart having been worked on and now his gut is next in line to be sorted out. Especially as catholic guilt is something that plays into the idea of being something you feel in your gut rather than heart or head - related.
And there is also something in relation to the catholic guilt of it all and Eddies gut and Chris feeling like women don’t stay thats in play with Eddies relationship with his mother - that she's stayed too present in his life and that she treated him is such a contradicting way - the juxtaposition of not letting him be a kid whilst he was a kid - needing him to be the man of the house in his fathers absence whilst then not letting him grow up/ treating him as a child when he became an adult - and dominating (or trying to) his life and how he (and Shannon) raised Christopher.
Because it is fair to assume that it was Helena who took Eddie to church every Sunday and who was predominately responsible for his religious up bringing (we don't know how long Ramon was away for but to me at least it feels implied that his business trips would be for several weeks or months at a time and then he would return home for a period before disappearing again) an therefore much of his catholic guilt is attached to her and how if they are going in the catholic guilt/queer repression direction it is Helenas forceful personality that kept him in the closet even if he managed to step back from Catholicism
Something something about hearts and guts and minds being concepts of the human condition that are so intricately intertwined and needing to be in balance - how Eddies heart has been looked at and worked on (his relationship with his father), how his gut needs to be worked on now (which is related to his mother) and then finally his mind - Eddie needing to learn to communicate and talk things through with people rather than burying it - something he cant do until he has worked through is catholic guilt and his letting his gut rule his decision making (even though it rarely pans out for him) - much like his mother has ruled over his life in one way or another until recently.
Something something about that being a mountain they are both climbing - but in different ways and therefore separately and it all comes back to them not talking - Eddie not talking to his son (he even had Buck have that initial conversation with him rather than do it himself) there is still so much misunderstanding between the Diaz boys!
Wow I did not mean for this to get long!!!! Hopefully it makes sense!!
it may just be the incoherent ramblings of a woman obsessed with the way they are picking a part Eddie and putting him back together - endlessly fascinating to me!!
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realtacuardach · 1 year
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One difference between the Lord of the Rings books and the Peter Jackson films that I find really interesting is what the hobbits find when they return to the Shire.
In the books, they return from the War, only to see that the war has not left their home untouched. Not only has it not left their home unscathed, battle and conflict is still actively ravaging the Shire. They return, weary and battle-scarred, to find a home actively wounded and in need of rescue and healing. All four launch themselves into defending their home and rousting those harming it, and eventually succeed. But their idyllic home has been damaged, and even once healed, is never quite again the Shire they set out to save.
In contrast, in the Jackson films, they return to a Shire shockingly untouched by the horrors of war. The hobbits of the Shire talk, in the Green Dragon in Fellowship of the Ring, about not getting involved with issues "beyond our borders," and it seems those issues have not invaded their sanctuary. After having been bowed to by kings, dwarves, elves, and men alike at the coronation in Gondor, their only acknowledgment upon returning home is a skeptical head shake from an older hobbit.
One of the most poignant scenes to me in Return of the King (and there are a considerable amount) is the scene where Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin are sitting in the Green Dragon. The pub patrons bustle around them, talking loudly, clapping excitedly, drinking cheerfully, just as they had in the beginning of the story. But the four hobbits sit silently, watching almost curiously at what was once familiar but is now foreign to them. Their home has not changed. But they have.
Which is the deeper hurt? To come to your home to find it irrevocably changed, despite all you did to keep it untouched and the same? Or to return home but no longer feeling at home, because it is only you that is irrevocably changed?
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ao3commentoftheday · 4 months
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The thing about spoilers is, I don’t actually think they spoil things for me. That momentary feeling of surprise when the big reveal happens is fun, sure, and I like trying to figure out a mystery on my own.
But I also just really love foreshadowing? Knowing what’s coming up lets me look for all the signs that the creator is laying out for me. It’s a different kind of puzzle, and one that I get just as much satisfaction out of, if not more.
If I enjoy a story, I’ll still enjoy it even if I know how it ends. The most lasting stories we have, as humans, have been spoiled for all of us before we even hear them. Famous tales become a shorthand that we use in every day life. Learning the story of the Trojan Horse actually became more interesting as a result of understanding the phrase first.
There was a time in my life when I didn’t understand people who would flip to the back of a book to read the last page before they started the story, but I think I get it now. There’s a comfort in knowing how things end and an enjoyment in taking the journey regardless.
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purpleminte · 22 days
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Not me getting secondhand anxiety looking at the absolute chaos of this hypothetical discord user’s life based on these messages-
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This person is apparently
• Travelling internationally likely very soon
• Currently having homework for an active biology class
• At least somewhat present in the moderation of a server
• Actively involved in competitive sports
• Has an engagement or event currently planned (that is understandably being ignored)
Maybe I’m lazy or something but this is enough to make me curl up and die
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thebibliosphere · 8 months
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With hindsight, I probably should have realized I was polyamorous/ambiamorous sooner than I did. (And to be clear, I realized it pretty young. I just didn't have the terminology for it.)
Ignoring the fact that five-year-old me used to watch Signing In The Rain! on a loop and was already making up stories about Don, Cosmo, and Kathy all living together in Don's big house and *gasp* holding hands (maybe kissing), I was never any good at shipwars.
Like someone would ask me, "What's your OTP?" and I'd be like, "Well, I guess I like X/Y, but also Y/Z is good too..."
And they'd be like, "No. I mean your one TRUE pairing," and I'd just blink at them like, I'm sorry, I don't understand the question.
I'm sure they thought I was trying to stir shit or being deliberately annoying, but I just... couldn't wrap my head around it. Why did I need to pick one thing? There were multiple options with different things that made them appealing. That's like going to an all-you-can-eat buffet and just drinking water. Which is fine! If water is all you want, great. But you don't get to go to an all-you-can-eat buffet and judge people for eating different foods...
And when I eventually found out multi-shipping was a thing, I was like, "oh neat, that's what I do!" and while there was a definite feeling of having found my people, it was weird having the moral judgment from other people who seemed to think multi-shipping was a symptom of a greater moral character flaw. Like my inability to settle on just one thing meant I was more likely to cheat irl.
This wasn't helped by the fact that I... kinda already didn't care about monogamy? Not the way my friends did. I didn't mind that my then-boyfriend liked Sarah, too. What I minded was that he went behind my back and kissed her when he'd told me I couldn't kiss anyone else.
It was the betrayal of the agreement that hurt. Because we'd agreed. He'd asked me to be exclusive with him, and I did. And then he... didn't. And my friends couldn't grasp that.
It was all, "How could he kiss someone else?!" and my chief complaint was, "Why didn't he tell me first?!"
Anyway, if I could go back in time, I'd tell teenage me, you're not weird and amoral, you're just queer, polyamorous, and have ADHD, lmao.
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brightwanderer · 5 months
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The more I think about hbomberguy's "Plagiarism and You(tube)" video essay the more I'm struck by a couple of his insights in particular regarding why people plagiarise - specifically, the combination of disdain for the people they steal from and entitlement to the things they steal.
Which has arranged itself into my head as: there is a kind of person who sees art - all art, including a witty one-liner or an essay on queer themes - as A Shiny Thing That You Put On Your Shelf So People Can Admire It And Compliment You On Owning it. When they see that Shiny Thing on someone else's shelf, they make a judgement on whether or not the creator deserves to have it. Is the shelf big enough? Fancy enough? Is the Shiny Thing being Properly Displayed?
And if the answer they come up with is "no"... well, then obviously it's fine to take it and Properly Display It. I mean, it's WASTED on that small-time creator who nobody knows about, right?
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isagrimorie · 4 months
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The more I dig into the Voyager rewatch, and the more I see Janeway is giving in more and more to the Valkyrie she's always inside. The more intriguing Janeway is. I already think she's great but digging deeper into Janeway is amazing.
I keep thinking of how Janeway holds on to the Starfleet regulations and it makes me think of that Doctor Who quote and how she fits the description to a tee:
"Good men don't need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many."
I feel this is Janeway -- she has rules for a reason, she's not evil but she also knows she can go very, very far.
Janeway has been through a brutal border skirmish in the conflict with the Cardassians. She downplays it but, how Kate Mulgrew, it feels like there was a lot more there.
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She ranked up from Lieutenant, not because of being a Science Officer but because she's a decorated vet in a bloody siege, where they won.
As we've seen from Sige of AR-558 and the episode in Strange New Worlds ground combat is a whole different beast from ship-to-ship battle.
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(Tom looks like a zombie in the last one btw)
Also, IMO, she's one of the more inventive tacticians in Starfleet-- the way she used the torpedoes in Year of Hell as a mine was amazing!
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That's a great naval tactic shit. Hot girl navy.
But also, Janeway fits so much the Doctor Who, Good Man Goes to War rhyme:
Demons run when a good man goes to war. Night will fall and drown the sun, when a good man goes to war. Friendship dies and true love lies, night will fall and the dark will rise, when a good man goes to war.
It's also true of Janeway that when the three people that form the basis of Janeway's mental health died and/or became very sick, Admiral Endgame Janeway happened. And then she destroyed the Borg.
Janeway needs rules for a reason.
/edited
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ditzycowgirl · 9 months
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I’d like to put my 2 cents in about tarot readings. It’s like a weather forecast. What may be true now will likely be subject to change later. For an example: a reading about your love life today will be drastically different than, let’s say, two years ago. Even if you’re in the same situation more or less. The future is in your hands. You are in charge of your destiny.
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minecraftbookshelf · 4 months
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At some point I'll be able to fully articulate my Thoughts about how Mumbo Jumbo's only previous Life season was also the only one where reds were explicitly forbidden from maintaining their old alliances and how he immediately turned on the other Mounders when he became red in Secret Life.
Of course he turned on them. He's never seen the loyalty of a red and their greens/yellows. He's never gotten the chance to.
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madlori · 1 year
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Yes, criminals need rights.
So I move in a lot of true crime communities. I’ve been a fan of true crime since, oh, 1980 or so (so enough with this “oh this brand new true crime trend” which has in fact been happening for hundreds of years). 
Sometimes there are opinions there which...trouble me.
Mostly when people express frustration about the rights of the accused, how rigorously they need to be defended, and the wish that criminals just had no rights and we could do whatever we want them.
Stop. That’s BAD.
But what about the rights of the victims and their families?
Here’s a hot take: the rights of the accused - and even the convicted - are more important.
Not because criminals, or those accused of crimes, are widdle babies who need protecting and we want to make things easy for them. That is not the reason.
We have to vigorously defend the rights of the accused, not for their sake, but TO PROVIDE A CHECK ON THE POWER OF THE STATE.
Lemme say that again.
THE RIGHTS OF THE ACCUSED MUST BE DEFENDED IN ORDER TO CURTAIL THE POWER OF THE STATE.
If you are going to give the state the power to punish, to restrict someone’s liberty indefinitely, or in some states take their life, then you better make fucking sure that the rights of the people at risk of this are being defended to the utmost extent of the law. The state can never, never assume that it will be easy to throw someone in jail. It must always know that it will have to prove its case beyond a reasonable doubt, respect the rights of the accused, and that the accused will be defended by people dedicated to that purpose.
If the state starts finding it easy to throw people in jail, or mistreat them during that process, you are handing it a tool to use against its political enemies. Which might at some point include you.
Should an honorable state require such countermeasures? Ideally, no. But the Constitution was written by men who understood the need for checks on governmental authority, and the right to incarcerate or execute citizens is one of the most dangerous rights the state has. 
So the victims and their families have rights, of course. But they are not the ones facing the state’s punishment. Their liberty or life is not in jeopardy.
If someone has committed a crime and the state needs to exercise its right to punish them, they should do so. But only after a rigorous process. Yes, it’s frustrating. Yes, guilty people walk free. Yes our emotions sometimes make us want to just see them hurt, damaged, or violated. But as they say, don’t ever hand the state a weapon it could use against YOU.
The state must have the hardest job in the room when someone is facing imprisonment or execution. That’s why their rights are important.
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thoughtfulfangirling · 3 months
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One of the coolest things, looking back, at Gargoyles is that it was a kid's show that featured a cast of adults. I never really thought about how unusual that is. One could argue that Brooklyn, Broadway, and Lexington are like teenagers, but even if we do, they take a backseat to the main character of Goliath and often enough Elisa, our main human character who is absolutely and entirely treated as an adult.
And I was not bored at all with that! In fact it made adulthood interesting in a way I hadn't really conceptualized it in the past if I ever thought to really consider it at all. And I just, I really like that about it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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stagefoureddiediaz · 26 days
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So these pictures are gonna be an end of episode Eddie reassuring Buck that nothing will ever come between them isn’t it - it’s the I love you to the core scene.
This is the shift in things that we’ve been waiting for and need - because Buck getting jealous is gonna push him into looking at why he’s jealous.
Is it next week yet?!
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realtacuardach · 9 months
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One of my favorite takes on Frodo, and why I value him so much as a character: unlike so many central characters in fantasy, he was not a Chosen One.
Instead, he was the One who Chose, and that made all the difference.
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ao3commentoftheday · 6 months
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managing creative envy
Just like in other areas of our lives, it's easy to be jealous of others when we create in fandom spaces and post online - the online aspect of fandom just offers more opportunities for it. Hits, kudos, comments, reblogs. Whatever unit of measurement you look at, there's always some number out there ready to tell you who's "better" and who's "worse" at whatever creative endeavor you engage in.
Except that none of those numbers actually gauge skill or quality.
When we're jealous of those numbers, what we actually wish we had isn't bigger numbers, it's attention. Reassurance. Excitement. Community. Whether the number is 5 or 5000, that's what it represents. We want those things and that other person has more of them, and so we end up jealous.
To manage that jealousy, we need to understand what we need and then find ways to get it. It might not come from posting on AO3, but maybe it comes from a local writer's group. Maybe there's someone in your life that you wish cared a little more about your "silly stories" and took you more seriously when you spoke about writing. Maybe what's missing isn't related to writing at all and it's more about having someone who cares about you and thinks you're important.
But numbers are just one thing to be jealous of. Perhaps the envy is instead because of another person's abilities. They come up with such interest plots! They have such fun ideas! They always have the perfect words, the singing phrases. For them it's easy, and for me it's just impossible!
Whether it's easy for them or not isn't what's making us envious, though. It's not about them and their abilities at all. It's about feeling like our own skills are lacking. The envy comes in because that person has what we want and don't yet have.
If we want to get past this type of envy, we need to refocus our energy away from being sad or angry or hopeless because another person is able to do something. Focus instead on celebrating the things we already do well. Take the time to notice improvements. Identify specific things we want to do better, and figure out how to learn. Remember, asking for help is always an option - and it might even lead to that feeling of community that might be lacking too.
Emotions are information that we need to take the time to interpret. Take the time to reflect on what's causing it. Find the thing that's missing from your experience and then figure out how to fill the gap.
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curiouscarnifex · 2 years
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There's a post with two gifs showing ASL signs for abortion going around, unfortunately while correct the second sign and information along with it was added by a terf.
So here's the original video by glassmenagerie on TikTok where they explain the two signs for abortion, the issues with one, and go over the signs for immigration as well because there's a similar right vs left wing sign difference.
Edit; I know how important captions I need them and there are captions on the original video, Tiktok glitched and removed them when I shared the video;
Please reblog this version with the script added
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brightwanderer · 2 years
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There’s a paradox in Bram Stoker’s handling of bigotry in Dracula. The narrative seems like it wants to stand up against the classism, sexism, ableism etc on display by the white men, but the vibes are… not great? It’s confusing sometimes how Stoker seems to be both condemning and reinforcing these attitudes.
I think I’ve figured out why that is. At the heart of all this bigotry is the basic idea that these “civilised” white men are the highest form of human being, and that everyone else is less than. The “peasants” of Transylvania are less than, ignorant and credulous. Women are less than, emotional and fragile. A madman is barely human at all. The clever men of England do not have to bother listening to those who are less than.
And the narrative punishes them for it! Jonathan ignores the fear of the locals and is trapped with the Count. The men dismiss and exclude the women, and so Lucy and her mother die and Mina is left vulnerable to attack. Seward treats Renfield like a funny animal that does tricks and so fails to grasp the significance of his attempted warning. Stoker is clearly challenging this belief that people who are less than can be safely ignored.
But. I think what’s happening here is that Stoker is challenging the wrong part of the belief. He is not, in fact, trying to say “actually, these people are not less than”. He’s saying “yes, of course they’re less than, but you should listen to them anyway”. He’s not saying “actually you shouldn’t sideline women because they are our equals”, he’s saying “actually you shouldn’t sideline women even though they are not our equals”.
Which is fairly progressive for a Victorian man, but LIGHTYEARS from actual equality.
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