#this also goes for me as the teacher though I should not be venting or saying faults to people when I talk about my day

[amfitzgerald]

𝙸𝚗 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙼𝚒𝚍𝚍𝚕𝚎 𝙾𝚏 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝

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𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: Bakugou x gn!reader

𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: hard angst, reader's death, death of the main character, angst without comfort, explicit blood reference, self-mutilation, depression

𝑾𝑪: 3k

𝑸𝒖𝒊𝒓𝒌: Metal manipulation

𝑺𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚: In the middle of the cold dawn, Y/N went to the kitchen of the class dorm to make something hot to eat, not long after Bakugou also joined Y/N but both ended up having a fight, where Y/N vented to him all worries and insecurities stored in chest…..

»Sorry for error, translated by google translator, proofread by me. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

The tinkling of the rain beat against the rain from the dormitory of the U.A.

It was winter, and for that reason the rooms were cold and as the electric heater in Y/N's room was broken, she was forced to wear warm clothes to handle the cold.

Aizawa had told Y/N that this fault would be fixed, but the teacher had only been notified the day before and for that reason Y/N still couldn't get anyone to fix the much-loved heater.

However, from continuous exposure to the cold Y/N ended up getting a cold.

It was 00:54 and the young student was now heading, with lazy steps towards the kitchen of Y/N's class dormitory.

As soon as the teenager arrives, makes a quick hot chocolate, while yawning sleepily.

As soon as Y/N takes the plate with the cake and closes the door with her foot, the teen sees a paper on top of the cake.

Y/N ignores it, crumpling the paper with one hand and placing it next to the plate on the stone table, already imagining it would be Kaminari's thing.

Probably Denki was complaining, saying that the cake was his, and he wrote the paper just because everyone was eating the cakes that were his.

Y/N then goes back to the microwave, which should already be finishing heating the liquid, and then she hears footsteps coming from the stairs.

Everything was dark, Y/N preferred not to turn on the lights to preserve vision, and at the moment when the footsteps were heard in the entire room, the microwave finished heating the liquid so loved by Y/N.

As all the lights were off, Y/N couldn't see who the person was, even though she knew it was one of her classmates, the woman couldn't see who it was through the black silhouette.

However, as soon as the person approached her she saw that the person was Katsuki Bakugou, the explosive boy (literally).

The blonde approached, not giving a fuck who was there.

Y/N appreciated Bakugou's figure, yawning with his mouth wide open, noticing a thread of saliva connecting the roof of her mouth to his tongue, while rubbing her hair with one hand , and with the other lifted her nightshirt to scratch her abdomen.

To the teenager's own surprise, what turned Y/N on the most wasn't the abs, but the very trickle of saliva that seemed to be glowing and calling to Y/N self.

Y/N moaned softly at the sight.

At that moment what Y/N wanted most wasn't attack the blonde's lips and break that thread of saliva.

Bakugou continues on his way to the fridge just over 1 meter from the classmate.

Instantly, Y/N turns around and continues to do what had stopped.

Y/N takes the medium cup of hot chocolate and walking in lazy steps, but firm at the same time, sits on one of the four chairs at the cook's counter, and starts drinking the hot drink, interspersing it with the cake she found in the kitchen. kitchen fridge.

"Hu, shit." the boy's booming voice catches her attention. "Did you eat the cake?" Bakugou asks referring directly to the teen, who was perplexed that the boy was talking to the Y/N, and just not ignoring Y/N, as he always did.

"Which one?" the teen asks casually, while breaks off another piece of the Japanese Strawberry Shortcake that one of Y/N classmates had made, and casually pops it into her mouth, enjoying the wonderful taste.

Bakugou raises his head a little to see what Y/N was eating.

"Fuck, the one you're eating." he makes an expression of disgust and anger at the same time.

"Ah, so it wasn't from Kaminari."

"Wtf, of course it wasn't the fucking dumb electroshock." Y/N watches Bakugou excitedly. "He doesn't even like whipped cream."

"And you like?" Y/N asks him, enjoying the situation.

"Of course, you little shit! Otherwise I wouldn't be complaining, would I oh dumb?"

Y/N looks at the cake and laughs lightly.

"Are you finding this funny???"

"Like…I'm not disliking it…."

"You son of a bit-"

"It's like, I would never imagine Katsuki Bakugou fighting me or anyone in general over a piece of pink and white strawberry cake." the other teen says starting to laugh like a hyena.

Bakugou starts to blush and doesn't react, which made Y/N laugh even more.

"Shut up, you'll wake the others up."

"And since when do you care?"

"I don't care." he retorts frowning.

"Oh, that's right, I didn't eat the whole cake, there's still a piece on the plate." she lifts the plate to Bakugou, so he can see the small amount of cake left. Bakugou groans angrily in response, but before he can say something to offend the teen, she stops him. "Do you want?"

"What? What the hell are you implying?"

"Bakugou, I'm just trying to be nice, but you're driving me crazy." she says it seriously, but Bakugou takes it as a pickup line, which makes him angrier.

"Are you trying to seduce me now?"

"What the fuck, are you using drugs?" Y/N says confused and don't understand anything that was going through Bakugou´s head.

"I SWEAR THAT-"

"Bakugou, you've got to be kidding me, for God's sake, think with your head and not with your ass. I'm not hitting on you, dammit. Do you want the cake or not?"

In fact, the young teen wasn't hitting on him, but Bakugou was too confused to think straight.

"I don't want the fucking leftovers. I'm not a dog."

"Hmph, with that temper you sometimes look like one."

"I'll kill you." he grinds his teeth.

"Go ahead and try it, and see if you don't come out of this dead." He roars in rage, making the young woman roll her eyes. "By the way, there's still Kasutera left, do you want one?" she points to the place where the soft cake was kept, making Bakugou go there. "I can make tea for you to eat with Kasutera."

Bakugou calms down to have a civil conversation with his classmate.

"I'm not drinking this shit."

"Uh, why?" Y/N responds feeling humiliated and despised.

"Because you're the one who's going to do it." Bakugou replies simply, starting to make the tea.

"You're kidding me, you can only."

"Face it how you want, but I refuse to be poisoned by a child."

"Child? Dude, I'm literally 2 months older than you." Y/N responds in bewilderment.

"And remains a child."

"Are you trying to piss me off?"

Bakugou ignores Y/N while taking his tea from the classmate, and sits in the front chairs, still keeping some distance between the two.

"Another thing I never would have thought to see in my entire life-" Y/N announces, but Bakugou tries to shush the teen.

"I don't care, now shut your disgusting mouth and leave me alone."

"Katsuki Bakugou drinking tea and eating Kasutera leisurely while enjoying the early morning with me~" Y/N ignores his mean comment and placing Y/N hand on chin, resting elbow on the table, and smiles excitedly at the boy.

Bakugou rolls his eyes and drinks the tea.

"Just because I have a short fuse-"

"So you know that." the teenager interrupts, pretending to test his patience for the classmate.

Deep down Y/N just loved to annoy the blonde, because that was the only Y/N way of showing that liked him, in a romantic way….

"Of course I know, Y/N, are you stupid?" The answer took Y/N by surprise. "But apparently you don't know you're stupid. Unlike you, I know very well what I am… and what I want."

Y/N frowns in confusion.

"What do you mean by that?"

"You change expectations for the future very easily. You are so influenced and manipulated by others that it even hurts to see."

Wait, how does he know that… Bakugou notices me? Y/N thinks dumbfounded.

"What the fuck Bakugou. I've literally never been-"

"What? You've never been manipulated and influenced, have you?" he says seriously and Y/N sits on the next bench now being face to face with Bakugou, putting the food aside.

"Exactly." she answers and Bakugou laughs.

"You don't know anything anyway."

"Oh, I don't know anything, do I?" she scoffs, raising her eyebrows.

"You are so influenced by Aizawa, All Might and the other teachers that you don't even notice. When you yourself think you know what you want for the future, then a teacher comes along and helps you with something, highlighting your skills and then you change of opinion, and goes aimlessly. You make me feel sorry by you."

"…Do you notice me much?" Y/N asks looking at the table, playing with fingers.

Bakugou was right, Y/N hated that about her/him.

And it was no coincidence that it was one of her/his biggest insecurities.

"What the fuck, what does that have to do with it?"

"How do you know this about me?" Y/N rephrases the question.

"Before I'm explosive, I'm observant." he answers.

"And you say that like you understand me better than I understand myself."

"And that just goes to prove that you really don't know anything. I don't know what you have in your head to think that I try to understand the other people. Others are nothing unless obstacles to me. And you're not exempt from that. Anyway, I know a lot more than you know about yourself. After all, you ignore your own problems instead of facing them, don't you?"

"…What does that have to do with it?"

"Instead of facing them to evolve you as a person and understand yourself better, and in a way to see how far your limits can go, so that another day you can go further and become stronger, you just ignore them and pretend they don't exist. And it becomes an addiction. That's why you're the weakest one of the class. You hide all these messes behind your fake laughs. You're so sick and ridiculous." he scoffs with no mercy, making Y/N snap out of control of her/him body.

Y/N grabs the collar of his pajamas, and forces him to get very close.

"Don't you dare say those words to me again, you son of a bitch."

"You don't boss me around, you bastard."

In a totally momentary blow, Y/N lands a very hard punch on Bakugou's face, making him stagger back.

"I think I used a little more force than I thought." Y/N mutters staring down at her bloodied hand.

In another movement, equally momentary, Bakugou places his palm on top of the table, and in a jump transferring the strength to his upper body, he jumps to the other side of the table, knocking Y/N down.

They begin to fight, and at a certain point begin to use their quirk.

Y / N had the ability to use the metals around him to his advantage.

Bakugou launches an explosion towards Y/N who, using nearby metals, from small appliances to bars that held the building, and thus, fusing them all, managed to create a shield that protected her from the impact.

"YOU ARE CRAZY, THIS COULD HAVE FUCKING KILLED ME!!!" Y/N screams, dissolving the shield.

"AND YOU ARE NOT HESITTING TO PUT A PIECE OF METAL IN ME!" Bakugou retorts, while picking up a lamp and using an explosion, he launches it at Y/N, who manages to dodge it in time.

At one point, Bakugou unleashes another explosion and not giving time to dodge, Y/N is forced to break the glass while jumping, with the help of a metal bar.

The moment she hits the glass and shatters it with the metal next to her, she feels pieces of shattered glass make contact with her pajamas her, and although the pajamas were thick, they were already full of holes, and even her nightgown her. The inside that Y / N had under her pajama top dela did n't have a different fate.

The two were outside the dorms, fighting on the grass in the middle of the night while being wet by the heavy rain that was falling.

One of her legs had been injured by his outbursts, and Y/N was limping.

Y/N grabs Bakugou's anti-arm, as soon as Y/N loses balance and feels like is going to fall on top of an iron bar broken in half imperfectly, but very sharp.

The young student feels the hand start to burn, and notes that it was because of Bakugou.

"Bakugou, wait-" before Y/N could finish, Bakugou's other hand was on the side of Y/N's head, hinting that he was going to release an explosion right at Y/N's head.

Y/N is forced to free the hand, and as one of the legs was injured, Y/N staggers, and while stumbling moves the piece of metal with the left hand, but at the same time.

Bakugou without thinking twice kicks the metal throwing it away from where they were and disoriented Y/N who was trying to move the metal away and because of his impulsive blow, Y/N ends up falling backwards, taking Bakugou with Y/N, both without really realizing what was happening in those seconds.

As soon as they were both on the ground, the older student felt a terrible pain in the back, piercing Y/N's insides, but at the moment, Y/N didn't process it, the student was just concentrating on the confused expression that Bakugou was giving.

Only then did Y/N notice that was crying.

Crying as fuck.

It was the first time Y/N was crying in front of someone.

Y/N tried and managed to be strong in front of people, hiding the real emotions and worries, but at that moment Bakugou knew and saw Y/N's sadness.

"I-I know I'm a person who can be easily manipulated and influenced by people, it's totally unnecessary of you to rub it in my face. I'm giving everything I can at this fucking high school, shit I didn't even want to be here!" Y/N vented looking with mixed emotions at Bakugou, who soon recovered from his surprise.

"Then just change schools and try to live a normal life as a citizen, we both know you're not strong enough for this course, and-" he replies rudely, without the slightest delicacy for his classmate's moment of weakness.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU DON'T KNOW THE SHIT YOU'RE TALKING TO ME!" Y/N breaks down in tears and grabs his pajama shirt in despair. "I was forced to take this shitty course! It was giving it my all or prostituting myself, dammit! It's all or nothing. My parents died and my brother forced me to choose one of those options. My psychology is all screwed up, if I didn't do it this getting what my brother wants, he kills me!" Y/N starts crying more and more, making Bakugou regret every word he spoke to the classmate. "I can't stand up to my brother, and if I can't pass the course, I'd rather commit suicide myself than wait to see the shit he does to me!" Y/N bursts out crying more and more, making Bakugou regret every mean word he hurled at the other student.

"Y/N…" For the first time since she met Bakugou, Y/N sees him completely regretful.

"And yet you say you know more about me than I do? Fuck you, you don't know anything about me."

"…You're right, I don't know anything about you."

"Hmph, my parents saw potential in my powers and since I was a kid they've filled my head to follow that, and my brother has continued his sadistic legacy. But it's not like he cares about me, he only cares about the status, money and the women it will bring you if I become a hero. To begin with, I dread the field of war." she leaves his shirt and bends down, lifting her head to look at the moon now feeling her back burn, and she already knew what had fallen. "I really have to become a hero…I'm afraid of my brother." Y/N mutters, the voice cracking with pain, both physical and emotional.

Y/N had nothing left to lose and no.

"I'm sorry." he says after a few seconds of silence, making Y/N face him with tears still in the corners of Y/N's eyes.

Y/N widens eyes and holds his head.

"It's the first time anyone's told me that, you know?" Y/N smiles fondly.

Bakugou was baffled, and when Y/N groans in pain he looks down to see blood on the ground, coming out of Y/N's back.

How could Y/N keep smiling radiantly at a time like this.

"Y-You're bleeding." he utters the words with a little fear at the thought of having killed someone.

"Bakugou, promise me that you will never see me as weak again?"

"Y/N, get up, you're bleeding mu-" Bakugou tries to get up, taking Y/N with him, but Y/N forces him to stay on the ground, even though the boy is traumatized by the possibility of killing a classmate.

"Promise me you'll see me as an equal." Y/N reinforces desperately.

"Fuck Y/N, this isn't the time for this you could die."

"BAKUGOU, PROMISE ME YOU'LL SEE ME AS AN EQUAL!" Y/N groans loudly as she grips his collar and forces him to look at her and not the blood.

"I-I promise."

"Really? No lies?"

"Yes, dammit." he says feeling a lot of things at once.

It was at that moment that Bakugou felt that feeling of his heart beating whenever he saw Y/N it wasn't disgust or contempt, but rather love…passion.

"Thanks." Y/N smiled gratefully.

Then, ignoring the blonde's efforts, Y/N lifts her hands from Bakugou's collar, to both sides of his head, and in a quick movement, forces him to lower his head so that Y/N can place his lips in his.

Y/N had nothing more to lose anyway.

Y/N thought that Bakugou wouldn't like what Y/N did, I mean, it was Bakugou, but to the poor student's absolute surprise, Bakugou grabbed Y/N's head as well and desperately returned the kiss.

Y/N opens the eyes in total shock, and sees Bakugou with his eyes closed, and… to put a teenager in even more shock, Y/N sees tears….tears not so hidden in his eyes.

It could have been the rain, but Y/N knew that wasn't the case.

Especially when I felt the bitter taste of his tears through the kiss, both from Bakugou and Y/N.

That moment was just Bakugou, Y/N, and the middle piece of shards of glass that had been thrown after the dorm kitchen glass shattered.

For some reason, the alarm that should have been on and activated at the exact moment the glass broke, had not once been heard in the air.

Was the alarm also broken, like the heater in Y/N's room?

Well that only the director knew.

But there was only one thing Bakugou and Y/N knew that no one else in the world knew.

They were kissing in the middle of the melancholy early morning rain.

The two students, hopelessly in love, wanted to stop the kiss due to lack of oxygen.

However, Bakugou was too confused if emotional because he just didn't notice earlier the crush he had for Y/N.

And Y/N was too tired to fight the drowsiness and weakness that the shard of glass in her internal organs was causing, just making the most of the taste of Bakugou's lips, saliva, tongue. To Y/N's surprise, even his sweat smelled good, like roses. Bakugou was truly a dream, where Y/N could only enjoy it in the afterlife…

She fought too long.

Y/N had lost herself/himself to depression, and even though she/him saw Bakugou now as an eminent salvation, Y/N knew that both of them were too chaotic for each other, and even though Y/N loved him dearly, Y/N couldn't stand the boy's narcissistic and explosive temper.

But, after all, Y/N knew that she would rather die facing someone Y/N's really liked than looking terrified at her brother's face.

Y/N, had fought too hard, the battle scars and self-inflicted cuts were proof of that.

And now Y/N knew it was the perfect time to rest forever and get her/him reward for the effort had put in until that day.

Y/N was happy, after all Y/N was in the arms of the person only dreamed of hugging in her dreams.

Dawn itself, the moon and the rain were the observer's only witnesses, almost like proof that this really happened and that now only Bakugou remembers…

Only him…

#bakugou x reader #bakugou x you #fanfic #bakugou x reader angst

[vonlipvig]

:))))))))))) venting a bit sorryyyy

man...once again i'm the villain for answering the truth when my mom asked for it :/

so, my uncle is going through some health issues. he's fine, but it's hard, and it's obviously harder for my mom, his sister. i understand that she's going through a lot, more than any of us. now, i'm going on with my life, i have my dance show in less than a month, and not everything is going as smoothly as it should be going. i'm fine, but most of my mates rely on me A LOT, i'm kind of like the glue that holds the group together, the one that remembers all the steps, all the positions, everything. so i'm trying to help everyone out, coaching this choreo and that choreo when the teacher is with another group, everyone keeps asking me where they need to go in each choreo, in each change, even though they should try to remember by themselves cause i can't be everywhere, but i do it because i care and if i can help, i'll do it.

so yes, i'm stressed. but it's fine! i deal with it! by myself! so i get home after practice, i'm famished, i'm making myself some sandwiches, and not talking to my parents cause i know i'm in a delicate state rn! when i get like this i'd rather just avoid people so i don't say anything i'd regret! but my mom goes and asks if i'm angry, and i tell her, calmly if a bit tiredly, that no i'm not angry, i'm just a bit stressed.

and shE GOES oh what do you have to be stressed about, I'M the one who's stressed. ??????????????????? WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THATTTT. i go (because i can't for the life of me not get another word in, my fault i know) to say that i never said she wasn't, or that my stress was way worse than hers, but that it's still valid for me to feel this way because this is important to me, and both her and my dad start calling me crazy cause how am i gonna compare my meaningless problems to my mom's very real ones, which is ?????????? (also hello? that's my uncle as well, of course i'm worried too!).

but yeah, i know there's nothing to be said, i know she's under a LOT of stress and that's probably why she's reacting that way, but it just feels so shitty. i didn't even say anything, i wasn't hogging their attention to talk about my woes or anything, i was quietly going on with my life, and i KNEWWW if i just told them "no im not angry" that they would have been like WELL YOU ARE I CAN TELL like GODDDD I CANT WINNNNNNN.

anyway none of you should care about this but i feel bad and there's an ache in my chest and it's stupid and yeah :/.

#just family stuff but yeah. im hurt. im angry. and literally any thing i said was gonna get me told off anyway so yeah. #AH WELL we move on #according to jules

[mogai-sunflowers]

cw vent // possible discrimination(?) // and maybe a long ask

I know that I already talked to my high school counselors about this but I feel like I should also tell you this.

So, one of my periods was Culinary 2, I already attended Culinary 1 w/ the same teacher and her class is also bake-shop. We'll call her Mrs. K. Now, Mrs. K IS a nice teacher, sure a bit of a pain, but she is now a far more LARGER pain in the ass after today.

So today me & my friend (we'll call him "G" <- he was the friend that is the cis bi metalhead I was talking about) were suppose to do a steak lab where we get to season our own steak and have it w/ rice and potatoes. We were both excited about it, obviously. Though, as I walk in, she says that I didn't do Chap. 11 notes and that they were my "ticket" to the lab. Now, I was HIGHLY confused about this, so I went to see if maybe I forgot to submit.

It turns out, I didn't submit some game meat note questions. Because, apparently, they were suppose to be due today instead of the date that it was assigned to--which SAYS they were due on March 29th, so I had plenty of time to due them. "G" says that he didn't see the notes because they didn't appear on the front page of them--we both thought we were okay to do lab because we did all the notes, but I guess not!! Trust me, we were both a bit frustrated by this.

Now, here is where things go and get worse.

Mrs. K said that she was going to talk to me after setting up the lab for the other students who were eligible for lab minus those who weren't. After twenty minutes, she goes to explain that we didn't do the notes on the deadline and therefore we couldn't participate. So I go and tell her that I wasn't aware due to the fact that the notes were set on a different date and that "G" didn't see them. She goes to say, "But I was telling the class all week to do their notes, so maybe you should've been seeing what they've been doing." Okay, rude bitch.

Now, as a bit of a deeper info: I have autism, along with depression, anxiety, PTSD, violent intrusive thoughts, and selective empathy, and (possibly, still not sure) an obsessive personality disorder; "G" has autism, ADHD, depression, bipolar disorder, sensory issues, intrusive thoughts and gets panic attacks--he also has another disability that affects his reading, which I mostly understand since I've often be a bit dyslexic and might mispronounce a word or misread the time. There is also another girl in the class with ASD as well, but she's a bit lower on the quote/unquote "autism scale." The rest of the class--I believe--is just mostly allistic/neurotypical.

So, "G" responded to Mrs. K saying that he has a disability that affects his reading and so on. So she went and said, "Well, if you're having trouble reading, do you need to sit at the front again?" So he got mad and stormed off outside to calm himself down as he was about to have a panic attack, leaving ME alone with HER.

So, I explain to her, AGAIN, that the date was different and that I didn't think I needed to do it TODAY. So she explains that the reason why the date (March 29) was different was because it was also the date grades get turned in. So I said, "Well, okay, but no offense, but that's just a bit misleading. Because how am I suppose to know when it is turned in with the dates are all different?"

It gets WORSE.

After I've said it, she then asks, "Well, didn't you hear me say it this week it needs to be turned in?" Now, as an autistic person, I tend to not answer right away, as I either need time to say an answer or I kinda lock up. So here I am, somewhat stammering to try and say, and she asks again: "Didn't you hear me say it? Yes or no?" And I say, still trying to answer her, "Well--yes, I did hear it--but, y'know--"

So, SHE TURNS TO THE FREAKING CLASS, who was doing their lab, and she (sorta) yells out, "Class! Didn't I say that the notes needed to be due this week?" And they go and verbally agree with her, somewhat loudly, while I'm sitting there, embarrassed that she humiliated me + also my friend who returned from calming himself down. This wasn't the first time she verbally humiliated/embarrassed her students, and it was mostly those who were a bit procrastinating, but only over and assignment or two.

After "G" comes back, we both proceed to defend ourselves. BUT, just "but," she goes and coaxes us like literally fucking children by saying: "Oh, well if you are having trouble with dates, I could personally write you two a calendar on what needs to be done and tell you." I am 16 (10th grade) and he is 18 (12th grade), he is practically a young adult and I am somewhat a sorta-adult as well. We are not fucking toddlers. Plus, this was the only time we were having trouble with dates since we both mostly get our work done.

So we both get mad and went to our counselor. Of course, I was reasonable a bit and decide to get a note from Mrs. K so I wasn't going to be in trouble or at least say that I have a note excusing us from class. I should've said it before in the beginning that the steak lab was the only day today to do it so we can not do it tomorrow and that'll risk us points.

So yeah, I'm still a bit pissed off. We already talked to the counselors about it and they said that they will follow up after spring break. I was just mostly glad we had someone to talk to us and not be rude. They listened to us very carefully and weren't rude 'n' stuff; we took turns talking about the experience.

tl;dr: the culinary teacher was very rude and I walked out of that toxic environment w/ friend.

Sorry that you had to read this reign. I kinda just wanted to talk to other friends about it. I know that you've had shared some ableist experiences and problems, so I figured I'd share mine. /gen

gosh I’m so sorry :/// teachers should be formally trained in how to accommodate AÑL their students. When a student tells you they have a disability and that’s why they messed something up, if your response is “well everyone ELSE did it” or you then treat them like a baby, you shouldn’t be a fucking teacher. I’ve definitely had authority figures like this, it’s really annoying. I’m sorry you didn’t get to do the lab either :// im tired of disabled students always been treated like we are just lazy or it’s just an excuse. Like, one of my best friends is legally blind and one of my teachers KNEW that and then didn’t accommodate them on any of the tests. I get panic attacks with presentations and i told my teacher and they were just like “everyone has to do the presentation”. I also have dyslexia and another learning disorder and my teacher got mad at me for needing extended time on assignments and tests. All of this to say, i know how you’re feeling and I’m really sorry 💕💕💕

#🌌written in the stars ; asks🌌 #tw ableism #ableism tw #teachers will make everything as vague and confusing and possible and then get mad when we don’t understand it

[penelopelima]

So, I know that this is an extremely regional subject and not a lot of people will be interested in it but let me vent, please.

So this week we celebrated the festivities of La Virgen del Pino, the virgin who is the patron Saint of our island (I guess? I don't really have the English vocabulary for catholic things, as a non-native atheist speaker) and has a lot of local folklore and legend around her. Though the celebration is in origin a religious one and it remains so, it is also the most important festivity all year round as it has a lot of emotional impact for everyone, not necessarily on a spiritual but an identity level. Does this make sense?

A lot of people do the "pilgrimage" to her, as in they walk from many different parts of the island to the church to see her, and this is usually for many different reasons (it's a regional symbol, it's a social, fun event, it's a showcase of local traditions, and some people because they have made a promise to the Virgin, etc). I have done it twice in my life, with friends, because it is fun and sort of symbolic of who we are and our identity as a people. But even if you don't walk, most people still go there during the week, and you usually find the sort of feeling there as you typically would in foundational festivities in other places. There are local markets, a lot of artisan products, music, all of that.

All this to say it is a beloved tradition, a very emotional one to many people, and that it belongs to everyone, not just the Church.

Well, this year, the bishop decided to use these said beloved festivities as a platform to condemn the voluntary abortion laws in Spain.

I'm raging. This is so fucking ridiculous, it feels medieval that a bishop dares to so boldly take part in political issues that honestly are completely out of his authority. And the thing is, this hasn't happened in the more than a decade that we've had the current laws. He just decided to do so because we have a left wing government that's making some feminist reforms and of course the fucking church has to shit all over everything. The public representatives present were shameful too, they all should have walked out when he began to spew his hateful crap. It's interesting that, in the midst of all the problems right now, the raging economical crisis, the scandalous levels of poverty and unemployment in the archipelago, the terrible effects of covid, he chose to take issue with abortion as the number one priority. It feels almost imported from the US, like suddenly the conservatives have become emboldened and envious of that disaster and want the same here.

I'm so sad, really, that it seems parts of the population are dying to get us back to when women had no say in their lives and bodies. We're making progress and it seems the moment this government goes, we'll have to star from scratch again. Sigh.

He explicitly mentioned one of the reforms gov wants to make on the current abortion law, to allow sixteen-seventeen girls the right to get an abortion without parental authorization, which was in the original law but the right knocked it down. And he fucking compared it to needing parental authorization for fucking school trips. Yeah, because teachers needing parents permission to take their children on a trip (anything else would be considered kidnapping) is exactly the same as a pregnant girl having a right to not carry a forced pregnancy. Right.

Somebody cut this man's balls off, please.

#personal #I'm seething #Fuck the church really who gave you permission to try to influence politics during a regional festivity #Stop preaching on women's bodies

[siderealscribblings]

“I am ninety-nine percent sure I know who Chat Noir is.”

It was a heck of a thing to drop out of the blue, but since Marinette revealed her identity to Ladybug, Marinette had gotten used to Alya texting or calling at odd hours with sudden revelations.

(“THAT’S how you knew Lila was lying?!”)

(“So when you skipped on our hangout sess a few months ago, was it because-”)

(“I’m just saying, I know I guy who might be able to doxx Hawk Moth.”)

Unlike her usual stunning revelations though, this one was not one Marinette already knew.

“Okay,” Marinette said, blinking to keep her eyes from completely bugging out of their sockets. “How do you-”

“I just felt like I should be honest, you know?” Alya chuckled. “Since...you know-”

“Yeah, no...thanks,” Marinette said, slightly dazed. “I...um...how do you know?”

“Well...let’s just say I noticed a pattern,” Alya said, chewing on the corner of her lip. “Do you want to know who-”

“No,” Marinett said, before quickly adding. “I mean...it would be better to keep things between us secret for now.”

Alya opened her mouth, an argument on the tip of her tongue, but seemed to swallow it with a nod. “Okay...yeah, sure, I get it.”

“It’s not that I don’t trust him,” Marinette said quickly, maybe more for her own benefit than Alya’s. “I do! I swear! I just-”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” Alya said quickly.

“And he’s wanted to reveal ourselves to each other for a long time,” Marinette muttered, ignoring Alya’s easy-out. “I was the one who insisted we keep our identities secret and I’m just...really, really not looking forward to the conversation where I tell him I was the one to break our no-sharing rule...you think he’ll be mad?”

“You tell me ,” Alya said, throwing her hands up. “He’s your partner-”

“He’s going to be mad ,” Marinette moaned, burying her face in her hands. “And hurt and-”

“And...so what?” Alya asked.

“So he’s my partner and we already have this...trust...thing between us,” Marinette sighed. “Long story short the last Guardian wasn’t a very good teacher to him and he’s had to deal with being locked out of the loop before...I just worry that I keep asking him to trust me while constantly keeping secrets from him.”

“And he’s keeping one from you,” Alya said gently. “Kind of a crappy situation all around but...well, let’s just say I think he’s a really understanding guy.”

“I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who constantly has to just understand me though,” Marinette said with a wince. “Sorry, I don’t mean to keep dumping all my Ladybaggage on you.”

“I’ll tell you if I’ve had enough,” Alya said firmly, squeezing Marinette’s wrist. “I don’t mind; really.”

If she lived another hundred years, she would never stop trying to return the kindness and understanding Alya had displayed to her since revealing her identity.

“Thanks,” Marinette said,, the movie on the screen forgotten as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “So...n-not that I’m prying for details but...this guy you think is Chat Noir-”

“Sounds like you’re prying for details,” Alya snickered. “Don’t tell me you’re curious about him.”

“Of course I am!” Marinette huffed. “Wouldn’t you be?”

“I don’t need to be curious; I figured out my boyfriend’s identity by myself,” Alya said smugly. “You want covert deets?”

Marinette weighed her words carefully before speaking. “Is he...out of costume...when he goes home...is he happy?”

Alya’s expression was unreadable for a long moment. “Do you want the truth or...do you want me to say something that will make you feel good?”

“Well that tells me the truth probably sucks, doesn’t it?” Marinette sighed, rubbing her eyes. “He’s got...he’s got a lot of friends, right?”

“He has a...few really good ones,” Alya reasoned.

“And his family?” Marinette asked.

“His family...exists,” Alya said as diplomatically as she could. “Look, we’re treading on major spoiler territory here; can you tell me what you want to know so I can pull it out from all the other information?”

Marinette stared down at her hands thoughtfully for a moment. “...being the Guardian by myself has been one of the loneliest times in my life. I have you now; I had Master Fu for a lot longer than he did. It would make me feel better if I knew Chat Noir was...okay outside the suit. But I think you just answered my question.”

“Look, I can’t tell you how he feels,” Alya said, rubbing Marinette’s shoulder gently. “I can’t read minds, Mari...but-”

“You think I should tell him about me?” Marinette asked hesitantly.

“I think that’s your call,” Alya said. “Do you want my advice?”

“You think I should talk to him,” Marinette said, deflating a little.

“If he finds out from someone who isn’t you, it’s not gonna do wonders for the whole Trust thing you got going on,” Alya said. “And...look, I think it’s great you reached out to me. And I think whatever you want to do with your identity is your business...but I think he deserves the same opportunity to confide in someone. In fact...I think he really needs it.”

“But how do I know he’ll pick the right person?” Marinette blurted out. “What if he picks someone who Hawk Moth compromises and-”

“Didn’t you just say you trusted him?” Alya asked, stopping Marinette’s catastrophizing in her tracks.

“I do...I promise I do...but-”

“You either do or you don’t,” Alya said softly. “And telling him that you broke your rules and he can’t is not going to convince him you trust him. Saying you trust someone is like saying you’re going to work out; you don’t get the results unless you actually do it.”

“I could pick someone for him,” Marinette muttered, looking up at Alya. “Someone trustworthy.”

“Someone you trust,” Alya said. “This has to be someone he trusts. Or else what’s the point?”

“You already know though!” Marinette said.

“ Hey Chat Noir, I completely trust you with my life but also, I’m going to make the choice of who you can and can’t talk to about your personal business,” Alya said, watching Marinette’s nose wrinkle in irritation. “Tell me how that chat is going to go.”

“You know ignoring your advice is getting harder now that you know about me,” Marinette grumbled, crossing her arms.

“Ignore it if you want; just don’t be surprised if this pushes you apart,” Alya shrugged.

“It won’t, he’ll…” Marinette trailed off. “He wouldn’t stop being my partner over this, right?”

“And if he did?” Alya probed. “Just pick a new Chat Noir.”

“I don’t-” Marinette swallowed, shaking her head. “No...I don’t want another Chat Noir.”

“Then you’re going to have to keep this one,” Alya said, squeezing her shoulder. “That means being honest and fair with your partner; if not about your identity, then about his .”

Marinette nodded mutely, turning her gaze back to the movie as Alya stood up. “Want something from the kitchen?”

“I’m good,” Marinette said, fidgeting with her bracelet as she tried not to dread the conversation she knew she had to have.

---

To his credit, the storm of accusations she imagined would come out of Chat Noir’s mouth did not come; Ladybug might have felt better if they did.

Instead, her partner looked dazed, blinking and nodding as his gaze turned away from her. “...okay-”

“I swear this is not about you,” Ladybug said quickly, tugging on Chat Noir’s arm as he turned away from her. “And it doesn’t mean I don’t trust you! I swear I do.”

“No I...I understand,” Chat Noir said, the cheer in his voice becoming more and more forced. “Um...you know, I-I have a lot of homework to do tonight-”

“Chat...please look at me,” Ladybug said, tilting her partner’s face towards hers. Of course she had made him cry, but she tried to push down her guilt. This wasn’t about what she did; given the same choice, she would have picked Alya again, even if it meant hurting Chat Noir in the process.

“I know I don’t have a lot of opportunities to display how much I trust you,” Ladybug said, licking her lips. “So it probably feels like I just tossed aside a huge chance to show how much you mean to me...but this was about me doing what I needed-”

“You don’t need to...you’re the Guardian-”

“That doesn't make me your master !” Ladybug said emphatically, startling Chat Noir out of his daze. “That doesn’t mean I can control who you talk to and who you confide in! I still...I still think we’re too close and rely on each other too much to jeopardize our working relationship...but if there’s someone in your life you trust, I...I want you to have the same opportunity. To confide in someone you trust.”

“Not you though,” Chat Noir muttered.

“There has to be someone else,” Ladybug said almost desperately. “Tell me I’m not the only person in your life you can rely on…”

Alya had been such a positive force in her life since she had told her; she thought back to all the times they had stayed up late talking, all the times Alya had listened to her vent about akuma, all the nights she held her hand because she had watched Chat Noir die to save her yet again.

Was there no one Chat Noir could turn to when he was alone?

Chat Noir seemed to chew it over for a long moment, blinking back tears still as he tried to grapple with the fact his relationship with Ladybug had shifted out from underneath him yet again. “...do I have to tell you who it is?”

“I think it’s better if you don’t,” Ladybug said softly. “Sorry...if I knew who you trusted, I might be able to figure out who you are. This way...I’m not the only one keeping secrets-”

“I don’t want to keep secrets,” Chat Noir grumbled.

“I know,” Ladybug sighed. “And I promise, I swear, the minute Hawk Moth is gone, there will be no more secrets between us! This... mess of half-truths and half-lies will end and we can just be-”

The idea of being something to Chat Noir outside the mask was something not even Alya knew; a secret all her own that might never come to light.

“This is just for now,” Ladybug said firmly. “Not forever.”

Chat Noir nodded, once again resigned to a fate someone else had picked for him. “I get it...I do.”

“Are you mad at me?” Ladybug asked.

Chat Noir weighed the answer for a long moment. “...no,” Chat Noir said with a shrug. “Just...can we pick this up some other time? I wasn’t kidding about the homework.”

For the first time there was a real wall between her and Chat Noir and Ladybug was shocked by how much she detested it.

“I understand,” Ladybug said quietly. “But I meant what I said when I said you should find someone to turn to. I wish I could help you with everything, but-”

“For now...you can’t,” Chat Noir nodded, putting on a brave face. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

Ladybug let Chat Noir slip out of her fingertips, momentarily reaching out to pull him back before thinking better of herself. She didn’t expect him to be sunshine and rainbows after telling him, but as firm as she was in her convictions, it still sucked to see him in pain.

Just deal with it yourself like he has to, Ladybug thought as she watched Chat Noir turn and dive off the roof of the building. Alya’s had enough on her plate...you don’t need to bother her with-

Her resolve lasted until she transformed, blinking back tears as she pulled her phone out of her pocket.

---

“Did I do the right thing?”

Alya said nothing, running her hands through Ladybug’s hair as she laid her head on her lap.

“Sometimes...doing the right thing hurts people as a result,” Alya said carefully. “It’s just a sucky part of life.”

“I hate it,” Ladybug sniffed, wiping her eyes with another tissue. “I think he thinks I love keeping secrets from him but...I really hate it. It makes me feel so alone...and I don’t want him to feel that way either.”

“And he can figure out how to feel less alone himself now,” Alya said soothingly. “This guy...I know he has at least one really great friend.”

“Like you?”

“...maybe a little better,” Alya said fondly. “I know he’d move earth to put a smile on Chat Noir’s face, so maybe let this problem fall in his lap instead of yours. You don’t have to do everything to make everyone happy all the time.”

“I want to,” Ladybug muttered.

“ Everybody includes you ,” Alya said firmly. “Take care of yourself first ; let Chat Noir take care of himself now.”

“I worry about him though,” Ladybug said quietly.

Alya glanced down at her phone, seeing a message from Nino flash on her screen.

Nino: hey babe

Nino: can’t make it tonight

Nino: adrien sounds really upset and said he wanted to talk to me about something

“Don’t." Alya smiled as she laid the phone on the bed beside her. “He’s in good hands.”

Ao3 

#my writing #miraculous ladybug fanfiction #ladynoir #platonic alyanette #post-Gang of Secrets #ml spoilers

[letarasstuff]

One kind of intern

(A/N): This was requested by @greenslifestuff :) It took me a week or two because I had to interact with my friends in order to get the inspiration I needed 😅 Summary: The team gets to work with a gen z teenager. Let’s see how that goes.

Warnings: Swearing and gen z humour

Wordcount: 2k

✨Masterlist✨

___________________________________

“Team, this is (Y/N) (L/N). She will be interning for the upcoming three months alongside this team. (Y/N), these are Agents Emily Prentiss, Jennifer Jareau, David Rossi, Derek Morgan and Doctor Spencer Reid and our Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia”, Hotch introduces a teenage girl to his team like this happens every day.

“Wait Hotch, we don’t get interns. What is she going to do, no offense, but getting us coffee or what?” Morgan eyes her suspiciously. She looks like any teenager grabbed from the street. A band t-shirt, a torn pair of jeans and a cup from starbucks in her hands. Nothing you would expect to even enter a federal building.

“No offence taken, Agent Morgan. I know having an ugly pickly bitch working with professionals seems weird. It’s just I have summer break and I thought it would be a good thing on my resumé if I already interned in the FBI, because I just graduated and I wanted to go to the academy this fall. But if you wanna do a vibe check with me first, that’s fine by me. Whatever floats your boat.”

The room falls silent. Then out of all sudden everyone turns to Garcia, who puts her arms up in defense. “I don’t even know half the things she said, ask her yourself.”

That’s how the BAU gets their first contact with Gen Z culture and let me tell you it is a wild ride, so buckle up your seats, drink your tea up because we aren’t going to make any stops.

“(Y/N), I need you to come with me. We are going to the M.E. getting the latest reports from our last case”, Morgan tells her while passing her desk. In the blink of an eye the teenager is ready, putting her denim jacket with various pins and bits of patches on.

“Derek, can we get starbucks on the way back? The pumpkin spiced latte is back on their menu and I am on withdrawal. Pleaaaaaasseeee”, she looks at him with a pouty face. Morgan smiles. “Ok, under one condition: We both get one, take awesome pictures and send them to the group chat and then we act like we didn’t get them anything, but we actually buy them their usual.” He got the hang of it pretty fast. “Deal, Sis.”

While they are in the car on their way to the M.E. the agent groans. “Ugh, road work ahead.” “Uh yeah, I sure hope it does!” Morgan eyes her from the side. His whole demeanor says ‘old and confused’.

“What was that, kid?” But (Y/N) begins to laugh. “Don’t you know vines? Short dumb and funny clips people made?” It’s safe to say that this afternoon he learns to speak in vines, getting on Rossi’s nerves because nothing makes sense anymore.

“Ok, I heard you wanted to become a profiler. So I thought I would show you some old cases and then you try to figure out the profile. I’ll present them to you like I do to the team, alright?” JJ and (Y/N) sit in her office, safe from curious eyes. “As right as the law, Ma’am.” 

“Good, this is a case from several years ago. It happened here in D.C. Three men were murdered execution style in the middle of the night in an alleyway. They were all from different backgrounds. The only connection between them was that they were evicted for some form of sexual harassment or assault. The UnSub also had a signature: A shot into their groin while the men were alive.”

Unfaced by the presented facts (Y/N) pops a piece of gum into her mouth. “It do be like that.”

“What?” “I mean, it’s obviously a woman. She experienced any harassment or assault herself. She also has excess to the files, I assume she works as a paralegal, since most of them are women. Female serial killers are extremely rare, but they are better organized. The only thing left to say is good for her getting revenge.” The blonde looks at the teenager with wide eyes.

“I-I guess but you know you can’t say anything like that to Hotch, do you?” She asks concerned. “JJ, I’m dead inside, not dumb. I know this.” But the agent shrugs. “Good. Though I really want to see his face.” “Mood.”

Penelope Garcia is the closest one to relate to Gen Z culture, since a great part of her time is spent on the internet. She happily learns about all the phrases and their meanings as well as the newest trends and hypes.

“Purp is sus, I tell you”, is heard from the lair into the hallway. Spencer and Derek look at each other with concern on their faces. “Do you think they are alright or do we have to-” “IT’S A SELF REPORT I SWEAR PENNY! YOU WORK WITH PROFILERS IN GANDALF’S NAME!” Spencer’s question is answered by that.

“Baby girl, crazy girl, are you doing good? Do you need help or something?” The older one asks warily. But it’s drowned in another screaming match. “I TOLD YOU PURP WAS THE IMPOSTER BUT YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM I VENTED WHEN I DIDN’T! I WANT ALL TIKTOKS I SENT YOU BACK!” “YOU DON’T DARE TO REVOKE MY TIKTOK PRIVILEGES!” “WATCH ME GARCIA!”

“Whoa girls, what about taking a break?” Morgan tries to diffuse the situation. “Yes, I think JJ got new pictures of Henry and Emily brought cookies this morning”, Spencer adds.

The girls, who mere seconds ago were ready to jump each other's throats, look at the other one. “You get the cookies and I go to JJ, deal?” (Y/N) asks. “Deal!” Without sparing the boys another glance they run out of the lair. Their devices are still lit up. A red figure shines into their faces. ‘AMONG US’ is written underneath it. “I think we get too old for this stuff, don’t we Reid?”

Spencer always thought he was young. Of course, his mind is older, but physically he is not that old. But the intern proves him wrong. And boy is he wrong.

“Spencer, is there anything interesting to know today?” (Y/N) takes a seat on his desk, distracting the genius from his paperwork. It is a common occurrence for her to go to him to ask for a fun fact.

“Do you wanna learn something about sloths?” His knowledge (or the writer’s) on this subject is astonishingly big.

“Spill the tea, sis.” “Did you kn- What? But I don’t have tea to spill. And I don’t wanna spill anything, I-” Reid rambles in confusion.

“It’s just a saying, Spencer. There is no deeper meaning to it then ‘Tell me everything about it’. You know, it’s mostly used for gossiping, but I don’t really like to gossip. That’s why I use it in a different context. You got it?” (Y/N) explains it to him in a soft manner, knowing her generation can be complex.

“Yeah, I think I do. Thank you for telling me. I really like the phrase. It has a nice ring. What about you spill the tea about all the phrases you know and I tell you some things from my knowledge?” “I think you got yourself a teacher, genius. But now tell me about the sloths, I love them.”

A few days later Rossi catches her doing some weird moves. “Are you having a seizure or what is your problem, youngster?” Even though he tries not to show it, David took a great liking to (Y/N), thinking of her like a granddaughter. Still, most of her actions confuse the hell out of him.

“I’m practising a dance for tiktok. My friends and I worked on a choreo we wanted to film later. Come here, I can show you.” And that’s what she does in the conference room. The teenager walks him through every move of the choreo, explaining the meaning to it and how it correlates with the song.

“And then you move your arm like that. Exactly like that! You did a great job, David! Are you sure you don’t want to come with me later? We can make you your own account and name it ‘Grandpa-on-tiktok’. You can promote your books over there and it’s a way to float with the trend!”

Seeing her this excited Rossi can’t do anything but agree to the idea. Also, he secretly liked doing the dance thing. It made him feel young again.

“(Y/N), you said you graduated this summer. But your file said you are 16?” Emily asks her one boring day filled with paperwork and countless cups of coffee. “It is what it is”, she mindlessly answers, too focused on filling out the work in front of her.

“I mean yes but how?”

“Emily, smart people exist. I know, coming from me hits different, but here we are.” Finally (Y/N) puts her pen away looking at the raven haired woman.

“What are you talking about? I can’t really follow you.” The more the intern says the more confused gets Emily.

She sighs. “I don’t want to leave you on read here. I kind of am smart somehow. Apparently I was smart enough to skip a grade or two. But it’s no biggie. Many peeps do this, so I don’t sweat it.”

“Even though I feel like you are selling yourself short here, I know you are an incredibly intelligent person. Someday you will be an awesome profiler and any team will be lucky to have you. I really hope we will be the lucky team. But I’m still not sure if this is what I should say in this context.”

“Emily, you are goals. This fam is squad goals. I really hope to be a part of this someday”, (Y/N) admits. “I’m sure Hotch will do his best to get you on the team, you became a great part of it. I can’t imagine a future without you.”

Sadly Prentiss has to get used to a time without the team’s beloved intern. On her last day (Y/N) knocks at Hotch’s door.

“Hey, I wanted to say thank you. The time with you and all the others was amazing and I learned so many useful things for not only the academy but also for my daily life. I really had a glow-up here”, she says after coming in.

Hotch motions towards the chairs in front of his desk. “Take a seat, (Y/N). I got something for you. See it as a compensation for not getting paid for your internship. You really did great work and a better job than some agents, who are doing theirs for many years already but don’t know half the stuff you do. You are a valuable member to the team.”

“Wait, you speak in presence tense. I leave you all this afternoon, you know that, do you?” But the Unit Chief only gestures to a white envelope on his desk. Quickly the teenager takes it and reads it.

“Are you serious Hotchner? Because I will cry you a river if you joke”, she threatens him.

“I’m dead serious, (Y/N). Even though half of your talks are difficult to understand, the other half is twice as useful and important. Additionally to that, you are like a fresh breath of air that the team needed. That’s why a place here will be available for you as soon as you graduate from the academy. I trust you that you will pass with flying colors, I had to promise that to Strauss.”

“Of course, Hotch. I swear on my Animal Crossing Island that I will do my best and more. Thank you so much”, she leaps into his arms.

The others watch the interaction from the bullpen, pretending to not get teary eyed. Their favorite Gen Z Kid will come back to them after all.

Taglist:

Spencer Reid

@calm-and-doctor

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x teen!reader #penelope garcia x reader #penelope garcia x teen!reader #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan x teen!reader #david rossi x reader #david rossi x teen!reader #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch x teen!reader #emily prentiss x reader #emily prentiss x teen!reader #Criminal Minds #criminal minds fanfiction #x reader #reader insert #x teen!reader #jennifer jareau x reader #jennifer jareau x teen!reader

[alphawolfice1989]

Reasons why Jackie should have ended up with Hyde not Fez

This is going to be a long-ass meta so brace yourselves. I’m still not over season 8 of That 70s Show. In my humble opinion Jackie and Fez are the worst pairing that was ever endgame (even though Robin and Ted from himym is a strong competor but more on that later). Jackie and Fez is just plain mismatched. Not only they have zero chemistry they are also completely wrong for each other. Even though I have recently found a forum full of Jackie x Fez shippers were speaking about how good they actually were for each other. “He has loved her for 8 years!” “He’s such a nice guy she just had to get over the fact that he’s foreign and they could work!” “She has always liked him!” So I’m gonna go through this show season by season and find all the reasons why Fez and Jackie were totally wrong for each other just because I’m bitter okay?

Season 1: This is when Jackie and Hyde hated each other and Fez had a crush on Jackie. Even though: 1) Hyde got pissed when Eric lied to Jackie, 2) Jackie tells Hyde:“If you wanna make out with me the answer’s PROBABLY no.” Probably. She doesn’t hate him all that much. Also 3) Jackie seeks comfort in Hyde’s arms after her breakup with Kelso, not Fez’s and 4) when Fez does try to comfort her she pulls away. She clearly likes Hyde much more than him even though she supposedly hates him. And then there’s my fave season 1 episode: Prom night. There are many important things in this one, this for instance: 5) Even though Fez is “in love” with her he doesn’t ask her to prom. He spends the whole night trying to get his english teacher to dance with him instead or 6) Jackie is clearly upset about something and Hyde asks her what it is. He DOES care about her no matter what he says and 7) he can’t stand the look at her crying so he does everything to make her happy. He takes her to the prom and helps her reunite with Kelso. He actually cares about her happiness. Also 8) he buys a tuxedo and a corsage for her despite his poor financial situation. Heck, he spent more money on her than he was willing to spend on Donna when he had a crush on her!

Season 2: This is when Fez is madly in love with Jackie while Hyde still doesn’t like her but at least they tolerate each other. 9) Fez makes a move on her in the dark when she thinks he’s Kelso. That’s creepy. 10) He also goes through her personal stuff without her consent whereas 11) Hyde is the only one who actually tries to get Kelso caught cheating on Jackie with Laurie. He also calls him out on his bad treatment of Jackie on numerous ocasions.12) When Jackie does find out Kelso’s been cheating on her she looks for comfort in Hyde’s arms. Hyde even says:“Why does she ALWAYS come to me?” This hasn’t happened for the first time. 13) Jackie vents to Hyde endlessly. They go on a “date” and she buys him shoes and 14) she gets upset again and cries and Hyde’s voice suddenly gains softness it doesn’t have when he’s talking to anyone else and he says:“Anything for you doll.” 15) Fez wants to take advantage of Jackie’s vulnerability after her breakup with Kelso while 16) Hyde tells him that she’s still on a rebound and he should give her space which 17) Fez doesn’t do and then gets upset when Jackie isn’t her usual super cute self. 18) Later, when Jackie is back to being her usual super cute self she openly rejects Fez and tells him that she only likes it when he worships her from afar. She likes the attention he gives her not him himself. 19) When Jackie is hanging out with Eric, Fez and Hyde and Eric, who really hates her asks why does she have to be there it’s Hyde who defends her presence there not Fez and 20) when Kelso and Laurie walk in and start provoking Jackie by making out right in front of her Hyde gets visibly pissed and so 21) he teaches her how to protect herself from Laurie’s insults and then 22) he invites her to the circle for the first time. 23) Jackie calls Hyde “the sweetest, coolest guy she knows”. Like has she ever said anything like that about Kelso, let alone Fez? No! 24) Even though Hyde still claims to be annoyed by Jackie he goes to prison for her without blink of an eye.

Season 3: Jackie has a big obvious crush on Hyde now and Fez has a big obvious crush on Jackie. 25) Hyde pretends not to like her back but he clearly does because 26) even when Formans threaten to kick him out of the house he still doesn’t tell anyone that the weed was Jackie’s and keeps covering for her. 27) “But Jackie and Fez went to roller disco together!” is a common argument of Jackie x Fez shippers. Okay, but that doesn’t mean she likes him back. She clearly still doesn’t. 28) “She wanted to have sex with him in that car but he refused because she was drunk and he’s a gentleman,” is another argument. How is Fez a gentleman?! Not taking advantage of a drunk chick should be normal because it’s the right thing to do! And yes Jackie gave him drunken consent but the next day when she was sober she turned him down again. 29) Jackie herself said that her and Fez will never happen. 30) Jackie tries to make Hyde jealous and brings a date to the Veteran’s Day barbecue and 31) she can tell it clearly works because 32) she understands Hyde better than most people and know that his:“That’s cool.” is just how he hides his real emotions. 33) Fez doesn’t seem to be jealous at all. 34) Her date turns out to be a jerk that just wants to bang her and doesn’t even like her as a person, so Hyde punches him right in the face. Hyde, not Fez because 35) Fez is just like that guy too! 36) Even Kitty knows Hyde likes Jackie even though he’s in denial 37) and says:“I can’t like her!” which means he DOEs like her he just doesn’t want to admit it. 38) He asks her on a “frickin’ date” during which 39) he teases her but doesn’t want to end it, 40) gives her his denim jacket and he himself only has a T-shirt on in November and 41) gives her his cola and 42) admits their date was no worse than bowling and he doesn’t hate bowling while 43) Jackie says it was the best date ever. 44) Then they share a hot passionate kiss during which 45) they both clearly felt something no matter what they say. 46) Fez himself admits that his crush on Jackie was just purely physical and 47) moves on and finds somebody else while 48) Jackie couldn’t care less. 49) In Valentine’s Day episode Fez says:“Be mine.” to Caroline and Hyde looks at Jackie and smiles. 50) When Jackie and Kelso want to get back together Hyde tries to stop them not Fez and 51) when they start dating again it’s Hyde who tries to break them up on multiple occasions. 52) When Jackie is getting her promise ring from Kelso she looks at Hyde and he shrugs as if to say:“I don’t know why are you with him.”

Season 4: Jackie and Kelso are together in this season and Fez is with Big Rhonda. They are not many Hyde x Jackie moments only 53) Hyde protects Jackie from the creep in funland even though 54) Fez was sitting right there and didn’t protect her. 55) Jackie brings an ugly girl to the Get Hyde a Girlfriend party and 56) Hyde offers Jackie a lowfive after she burned Eric and 57) they played Mary and Joseph in the Chrismas play for church. 58) Hyde likes Jackie in her cheese maid uniform and 59) teases her a lot during his season like when he drew a monobrow on her with a marker on the Snow Prom. It’s kind of like in kindergarden when a boy is pulling a girl’s braid. 60) She is the first person to say happy birthday to him and she kisses him on a cheek and they hug. 61) They dance together in the musical episode. 62) Hyde gets mad at Kelso for his constant whinning about Jackie kissing the cheese guy and calls him out on it and finally 63) when Donna opens the door and it hits Jackie, Hyde catches her.

Season 5: This is the season in which 64) Jackie and Hyde finally got together and Kelso wants to get Jackie back, while 65) Fez couldn’t care less. 66) Jackie and Hyde’s kisses are 100x more passionate than that one kiss she and Fez shared in 201 which was supposedly Jackie’s best kiss ever and 67) they frech like two french people on a frenching festival. 68) Hyde taught Jackie that she can’t always get what she wants while 69) Jackie made Hyde softer. 70) He shaved his beard off to cheer her up and 71) they both are planning a future together only after 3 months of dating and 72) Hyde makes Jackie realize that she doesn’t need a man to take care of her and she can have a carreer and make money herself. 73) Jackie herself says:“Steven, I know in my heart that the only person I want to fight for is you!” He is the only person she wants to fight for, not Kelso, not Fez, but him! 74) Hyde gives her a birthday gift that wasn’t expensive but is really sentimental and Jackie appretiates it. 75) Hyde, a guy that said back in season 2:“Why would you just want to cuddle with her when you can do it?!” cuddled with Jackie in his bed every night for three weeks while 76) Fez hides under Jackie’s bed while she is asleep and masturbates there. That’s the guy she ended up with, all right. 77)Hyde was really sorry about the whole nurse thing, even though I know it’s no way excusable he was feeling very guilty and 78) she’s the only person Hyde has ever said:“I love you.” to sober. 79) Even Donna said Hyde is the one for Jackie. 80) When Jackie heard that someone fell of the water tower she immediatelly worries about Hyde not Kelso, or Fez. 81) “I have never felt this way about a girl before. I wanna be with her.” Do I need to say more?! 82) “I know I love Steven because he’s smart and he’s deep and we have conversation and he makes me think which used to give me a headache but now I really like. But Michael is so beautiful!” The only good thing she can think of in Kelso is his looks while she doesn’t even mention Fez. He isn’t even an option for her.

Season 6: This season started with Jackie torn between Hyde and Kelso. Fez is married to Laurie. At this point the show is stirred into Jackie x Hyde direction not Jackie x Kelso or Jackie x Fez. 83) Jackie chooses Hyde. Not Kelso, not Fez, Hyde! 84) Even Kelso and Fez themselves ship Jackie x Hyde meaning they have both moved on and don’t want Jackie for themselves anymore. 85) Hyde himself admits that he wants to be with Jackie and 86) his half smile when he kisses her do I need to say more?! 87) Jackie can’t keep her hands off her Puddin’ Pop and 88) he likes it when she calls him that. 89) Hyde is slowly becoming whipped which is cute af, 100x cuter than when Kelso was whipped and 90) He says things like: “We’ve been tip-top since the moment I met you.” or “You make me happy.” and 91) only smiles like that for her. 92) he teaches her how to play chess and inspires her to read books. 93) even though he has some commitment issues he likes her in a wedding dress which means some day they are gonna get married! 94) Fez tells Jackie:“Don’t drink too much, I’ll take advantage.” This is the man she ended up with.

Season 7: This is when Jackie and Hyde are together and 95) even Fez seems to ship them and 96) he himself seems to have a crush on her ex boyfriend Kelso, not her. 97) Jackie is passive-aggressive towards Hyde’s father that abandoned him and defends Hyde to him with the words:“He’s perfect!” 98) She has never called Fez perfect. In fact I don’t remeber one positive thing she said about Fez over the years. 99) Jackie bakes cookies to cheer Hyde up. 100) After their breakup Fez supports her and helps them get back together. 101) Even Eric says Jackie makes Hyde happier than ever. 102) Hyde didn’t ditch Jackie because she’s his chick. 103) Kelso said to Eric and Donna:“ I think they (Jackie and Hyde) are going to last longer than you.” Yeah, but guess who was endgame and who wasn’t. Not cool season 8 writers, not cool! 104) Jackie says Hyde is the most important thing in the world for her and 105) he admits to the gang that he wants to marry her and 106) to Leo that he loves her. 107) He travels all the way to Chicago to propose!

“But Fez has loved her for eight years!” Jackie x Fez shippers say. Well, first of all, the show is set between May 1976 and December 1979 so no, he couldn’t have loved her for 8 years. And second of all, he stopped liking her in season 3 and never expressed any kind of interest in her again.

“He’s such a nice guy, she just had to get over the fact that he’s foreign and then it would work.” This is wrong on so many levels. First of all, Fez is not a nice guy. He stalked her and Donna through her window, went through their things, hid in Donna’s closet or under her bed to masturbate, tried to pick up chicks at the ladies’ restroom… the list goes on and on. Second of all, as an immigrant I wouldn’t want to be with somebody as xenophobic as Jackie.

“She has always liked him! You could tell by the way she looked at him!” Well, did you see the way she looked at Hyde in 225, 301 or 709???! Beacuse those were massive heart eyes!

“Jackie needs a guy that is as obssessed with her as she is with herself. She needs someone who truly admires her.” How is Fez that guy?! Fez never admired Jackie. He was disgusted when she had something stuck in her teeth on their first date. He ditched her on that wedding in 621. He treated her poorly, even in season 8 when they were supposed to be in love. He called her a bitch, a whore, a slut and a spoiled brat multiple times, locked her in her room while he was on his date with his crazy ex Caroline, told her she’s ugly inside and out, he dyed her hair green, he told her wearing makeup makes her a liar because she looks gross without it and the list goes on and on. The most outrageous was when he told her that he can’t be with her because she dated two guys before him while he dated and banged many and many chicks before her! Talk about hypocrisy and double standards.

In conclusion, Jackie and Fez were a damn disaster. Some people say that it wouldn’t have been if they had got together in season 2 or 3 but I think timing wasn’t the only issue here. They weren’t right for each other and had zero chemistry. Jackie and Kelso had great comical chemistry and were funny together but didn’t work either and Jackie and Eric were just nonexistent, I don’t get why do some people even bother to ship them. Jackie and Hyde were what worked for me and many other fans and that’s what should’ve mattered to the season 8 writers.

https://love-geeky-fangirl.tumblr.com/post/180235477640/reasons-why-jackie-should-have-ended-up-with-hyde

#jackie x hyde #hyde x jackie #that 70s show #steven hyde #jackie burkhart

[kaashiboo]

ahah heeeey!!!!! can i request kenma, akaashi and sugawara as best friends with gender neutral reader?

thank you for your hard work i really enjoy reading your headcannons (灬º‿º灬)♡

haikyuu boys as your best friend

┇ kenma, akaashi, and suga

gn!reader

【warnings: none】

➢ general note: ohoho this is a very long one so buckle up!

✎ a/n: aaww this is request is cute! thank you for appreciating my work and i'm so glad you enjoy reading them! take care of yourself!<3

kenma

you've been friends with kenma and kuroo ever since you were a child but you're more close with kenma due to his chill personality.

but that doesn't mean that you're less chaotic

kenma honestly questions himself as to why he's best friends with you

but you're a bit more tolerable than kuroo he guesses.

"say, if i hypothetically and accidentally broke your swi— kenma, you're gonna kill me with your stare." you laugh nervously.

"give it to me." you removed your hand behind your back and gave him his switch with a pout.

"are you mad at me?" you asked, rubbing your nape. awkwardly.

kenma sighed loudly, "yeah."

"oh" your shoulders dropped.

"but it's fine since i already bought a new one. i'm mad because i was planning to give you this one but i guess we have to make someone check it out if it's still repairable." he replied and your eyes lit up in excitement.

"really?"

"yeah."

"but i don't have the money for it."

"we'll make kuroo pay." he shrugged and you tilted your head in confusion.

"eh? do you really think he would agree to that?"

"i don't know. maybe. just do all his work or compliment him everyday, that might work."

"are you two planning on how to murder me?" kuroo appears out of nowhere, ruffling kenma's and your hair.

"yes." the setter and you answered in unison.

people also wonder how you can keep up with kenma but you're honestly one of the people that can see through him and could tell whether something is bothering him.

and he never hesitated to show you what he really feels. if he's mad then you'd let him vent and let out all his frustrations.

and there were times as well where he just wanted to be away from anyone so you gave him space.

but because he finds you tolerable, he begged you to not distance yourself from him.

now, in terms of YOU being sad, we all know he's not the greatest when it comes to comforting people but he would always find a way to cheer you up like offering you to play games with him.

he would even let you do the interior design of his house in minecraft as long as he can see you're enjoying.

just like what others do, he would typically protect you from mobs while you pick up flowers.

but most of the time, you would have a competition on which person could kill as many mobs as they can.

you also would do stupid challenges that you see on youtube.

and late night walks with him are the best since you never had to worry about bothering him when he rarely sleeps early.

let me rephrase that real quick, it's mostly you walking around while kenma sits on a bench,,, still playing.

but he would occasionally look for you to make sure you weren't lost or kidnapped.

you would eventually get tired so you just... lay on the grass and roll around.

kenma puts down his switch, "what are you doing, y/n?"

"i'm bored. you're not even paying attention." you whispered the last part but he still caught it.

"alright, sorry. stand up now. let's go to the convenience store and crash at kuroo's house." he offered and you immediately agreed.

because the two of you never failed to be in the same class every year, your classmates would be confused since you two would verbally fight and give each other a silent treatment and then one second later, you would give him food and he tries to help you beat the level you're currently on with the game you're playing.

and in the timeskip, the three of you have stable jobs like, rich rich rich very rich.

"at this point, we can be your sugar daddies." kuroo jokes but you paid no attention to him as you were still busy processing with what kenma gave you as a present.

literally everything you need for streaming— heck, you're not even sure if you would use all of them.

but kenma still wanted to drag you along with him to do things that he loves

not that you'd complain about it anyway.

"you're helping me set everything up." you finally recovered from your state of shock and pulled kenma up from your couch.

akaashi

and the best 'best friend' award goes to akaashi keiji!

look, just because he's a laid-back person, doesn't mean he's unaware of how to push your buttons.

he would subtly annoy you. so subtle that not everyone could notice that you wanted to murder him on the spot.

"akaashi keiji, i will seriously ki—"

"it's settled then! y/n, please come to my office now." the teacher spoke, making you groan in frustration before standing up but you made sure to purposely step on his foot and he silently winced in pain.

the chat with the teacher didn't take long and when you exited the office, you saw your best friend standing outside, waiting for you with a barely noticeable smirk.

yeah, we might have to take back his award.

you rolled your eyes and walked past him but he grabbed your bag and pulled you back.

"sorry, do i know you?" you scoffed.

"look, i'm sorry. i already told you that you shouldn't sleep in class." he reminded, implying that him dragging you into doing something was a sort of consequence from sleeping in class.

"i know! but you decided to be annoying again and volunteered that i would help with some activity." you complained. he still hasn't let go of your bag but you continued walking which may or may not made it look like you were his pet.

akaashi knows you're not actually mad at him and so he didn't have to bother to apologize again.

"if it makes you feel better, i volunteered first before you. at least we're now both busy."

you didn't respond and continued walking, "where are you going?" he asks.

"home."

"no."

"no?"

"i have practice," he said.

"what does that have to do with me?!" you wailed.

"nothing." you facepalmed and let him pull you to the gym.

the first time you met was during middle school. you were crying because you lost a competition and unfortunately for you, akaashi was the one who won.

he tried comforting you but you pushed him away.

akaashi was persistent though. he didn't want you to stay mad at him and so he bothered you everyday until you finally started to warm up to him.

you sighed for the ninth time. deciding to make a paper plane and throw it to akaashi's way.

it fortunately hit his forehead and he 'tsk-ed' at your action but he continued reading the book anyway.

you reached for the plane, crumpling it until it's round.

"i thought you were gonna teach me?" you question and threw the paper at him, again but lucky for him, he caught it.

he pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration, "how am i supposed to teach you if you keep throwing things at me?"

you see, you're smart but there are certain subjects that you really hate and you coincidentally got sick during a discussion and now you and akaashi are currently studying in the library.

he knows he could have just lent you his notes and you can just take a photo of it but he wouldn't let you do that because his reasoning was, "you'll learn better if you write it down." you've complained to him about it many times and he'll eventually get tired and not give you anything so now you've learned your lesson,

don't annoy keiji.

but sometimes, he's kind enough to cover for you when you're asleep during class and would lie to the teachers by saying you're sick.

which rarely happens since he doesn't always tolerate you so being friends with him feels like having a parent watch you all the time.

"maybe if i befriended konoha then i'm already done with this." you huffed.

"he doesn't have the patience to deal with you, y/n." you let out an offended gasp before throwing your pencil case at him.

honestly speaking, the two of you get along really well. you're more talkative and he tends to listen to your rants a lot.

and of course, he would also share to you how his day went and how he found a new way to get bokuto out of his emo mode.

hanging out with him outside of school can be chaotic at times.

especially if you decide to go to the arcade because expect him to tease you a lot when you couldn't get the prize you wanted.

he would help you though:)

and since you two are a popular duo, you would often get a lot of confessions from boys and akaashi would ramble about how it's a waste of time and that you should focus on your studies.

but he would also reassure you that he'll support you no matter what decision you make.

in conclusion, he's a bit confusing and indecisive but he just wants the best for you but then he would also start thinking that he's being controlling of your own life.

akaashi also can't keep his cool sometimes,

"i can't believe they cheated on me." you hugged your legs closer to your chest as you sob.

his practice was already over but he insisted that the two of you stay at the gym so that you could talk to him about your problems.

"they’re an asshole, y/n." he replied.

usually, he would rub circles on your back when you're crying but this time, he stayed still on his seat so you glanced at him and frowned.

"you weren't even paying attention," you said.

"i was," he stopped typing on his phone to look at you.

"i was just searching up ways how to murder someone without getting caught." he joked and you chuckled.

"just kidding. i was ordering your favorite food. now stand up and wipe your tears. don't let that asshole see you vulnerable. show him that you don't even need him in the first place because you don't need anyone, 'kay?" he pulled you up and nodded at his advice.

"except for me, of course. how else would you be alive if it weren't for me?"

"i have my own parents." you rolled your eyes playfully.

"they don't love you— they prefer me." he teased once again. earning a punch from you.

suga

aDMIT IT, SUGA IS SO FUN TO BE WITH.

like sureeee he would help you most of the time

but he's also the same person that would get you in trouble.

"vice principal, i am so sorry! i didn't mean to knock off your wig! please don't suspend me—"

"it's fine, l/n. just go and don't tell anyone." the old man sighed.

you bowed and left, running to where suga was standing.

you saw your friend biting his lower lip to stifle a laugh.

you glared at him but you couldn't help but to cackle at what happened and now you two are being noisy in the hallway that made others look at you weirdly.

"i told you, he's bald!" he exclaimed and your laugh couldn't get any louder until you start coughing from the lack of oxygen.

"oH MY GOD— DON'T DIE ON ME Y/N," he said dramatically before offering you a bottle of water.

"you're so dramatic, please shut up." you rolled your eyes after drinking.

you and suga have been arguing for a week about how he witnessed himself how the vice principal's wig flew off and it was too good to be true so you didn't believe him.

not until your beloved best friend pushed you to the vp's direction accidentally.

you were taller than the old man so when you bumped into him, you wanted to grab onto something for support but instead, you knocked off his hairpiece.

and suga ran away instead of helping you.

we love a supportive friend.

"well at least he was kind enough to not give you a punishment." suga shrugged and you just nodded your head in agreement.

when you transferred to karasuno during second year, you luckily met suga when you asked for directions.

you two were in the same class so he accompanied you the whole day.

he was very talkative and you loved hearing him talk about volleyball.

at first, you admired him for how approachable and kind he is

but now you just want to kick him.

"i said he wasn't my crush!" you convinced him but suga ony hummed in response.

"but you were staring at him with heart eyes." he quirked a brow.

"i wasn't!"

"you were!"

"i wasn't!"

"you we—"

"suga and y/n, that's enough." daichi sighed. pushing the two of you apart from each other.

"daichi! your vice captain is being annoying again."

"daichi, did you know that y/n has a crush on y—" his words were cut off when you covered his mouth with your hand and he had no choice but to bite your palm and you backed away in disgust.

"i don't like you anymore." you huffed and he just ruffled your hair.

"ah really now?" he smiled but you knew that behind that smile was an evil intention.

"nevermind." you muttered. not trusting your own friend.

oh and your parents adore suga.

like, they know you have other friends as well but suga is the only person they trust to be with you all the time.

and honestly, you agree with them. no words or numbers could describe how much you trust the setter.

despite his naughty and chaotic attitude, he always takes care of you.

kind of like akaashi but he's a bit more loose.

he's very good at giving you advice.

he's also the type of friend that sulks when you miss a game.

like, he would literally ignore you.

and now you're struggling how to make him forgive you.

"kōshi, enough. you've been ignoring me for a week! it was just one game, come on." you persuaded, poking his side but he didn't budge and continued writing down notes.

"i'm sorry for missing your game. i swear, it was an accident! i would never miss your next match again!"

he shifted in his seat and your eyes were filled with hope.

he looks at you with a slight hint of disappointment, "even if i'm not a regular anymore?" the question caught you off guard.

"what do you mean?" he remained quiet and you took that as a sign that he didn't wanna talk and so you impatiently waited for classes to be over.

as soon as you were dismissed, you pulled him out of the classroom to take him to your favorite spot just near the gym.

"i don't like how you're doubting my ability to support you. it doesn't matter what you do— heck, you could even commit a crime and i might bail you out of jail." you uttered. finally breaking the silence that engulfed the two of you the past few minutes.

you struggle with expressing how you feel sometimes and being able to decipher your analogies is one of suga's skills.

"your comforting skill is top tier." he replied.

you know how he would playfully hit his teammates? he'd do the same to you but he would only give you head pats, not wanting to hurt you physically.

and you unexpectedly just learned how to love it.

it somehow inspires you to work harder since he only gives you head pats when you achieve something and it's his way of congratulating you!

he also likes to drag you along with him. he wants to watch a movie? he would buy an extra ticket just for you!

but sometimes, he would whine about being broke when he's with you🤡

would also be ready to make a presentation as to why you are his platonic soulmate.

please just agree with him so he won't be sad</3

last but not the least, gossiping.

literally, the two of you will not call it a day if you haven't talked about any issues at all.

so even if you were sleepy, he would call or text you in the middle of the night and be like, 'tea time?'

aaahh imagine how shock i was when i saw that this was about 2k words overall AHAHA. i know that akaashi's part seems a bit off but honestly i just imagine him being a bit mischevious and more open to people he's genuinely close with so yeah! i had so much fun writing but i feel bad becaue it was so long- anyway, thank you for reading!<3

#kaashiboowrites #haikyū!! #haikyu x reader #kenma x reader #akaashi x reader #sugawara x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu scenarios #akaashi headcanons #akaashi imagines #akaashi fluff #kenma headcanons #kenma imagines #kenma fluff #suga headcanons #suga imagines #suga fluff

[modsou]

Heyo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! may I please have Mishima, Mai and Shunsuke relationship headcanons? :-D

Hello :D of course you can, here you go:

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■

mishima, mai, shunsuke relationship headcanons!

Mishima loves your laugh so he will constantly be making jokes but he can barely get through them without laughing his azz off

He really likes making you happy in general so he often goes above and beyond just to see your smile

This might be seen as overbearing by some people but he is very observant of your behavior so he can give you advice, be able to tell what you're feeling, and whatnot

As an art teacher, he will offer to paint you a portrait, and he is very proud of his art, so he will be cocky about it if you let him paint you

Due to him being a teacher, he loves children! He thinks they are adorable and fun, and he often talks to you about his students

If you want children, he would dream of raising them with you

Very good listener, he is willing to sit down and hear you vent any time

He is actually an active listener too, he will never get bored of hearing you talk

Mishima is also a very calm person, he enjoys doing silent activities like drinking tea and reading books

He would enjoy making tea for the two of you so you could sit and enjoy each other's presence

He's also the type of person to really appreciate nature

He would probably take you hiking or sightseeing, or the two of you could sit near a river and paint your surroundings

He definitely wants to teach you about art

Mishima's ways of showing affection include hugging you from behind, holding you by the waist, and resting his hands on your shoulders

He likes gentle touches!

We know Mai is a baker, so she would incorporate that into your dates

Sometimes she would bake for you, sometimes the two of you would make something together

Whenever she tries a new recipe, you are the first person she asks to do a taste test

Mai would like cottagecore

The aesthetic, and the clothing, mostly

She would think it would be fun to match dresses with you (if you wear 'em)

She will call you names like Sweet Cheeks, Sugar, Dear

She's also flirtatious, always knowing how to get you to blush and fluster

Subtle ways of showing affection for her include pinching your cheeks, patting your head and eskimo kisses

Mai sometimes feels inferior because she has a hard time contributing, so she will often find you to console her

All she needs from you is a shoulder to cry on and a pat on the head, but words of wisdom are appreciated too

Like Mishima, she is a gentle and calm person, but is more likely to be rowdy

Date sites would include parks, concerts, themeparks, movies, etc.

She is so proud of having a partner like you!

She'll often brag about you to others, or brag about you to your face just so you know how much she loves you

Shunsuke is a simple man

Many nights with him include staying up watching tv, takeout, and then sleeping in the next morning

Though, sometimes he is insecure and believes he isn't enough for you, so expect him to surprise you with cliche gifts from time to time, especially on holidays

He is very domestic without even realizing it

He wakes up early to do chores and cleaning, even making you food at times

Like I said, one of his insecurities is being "boring" so he likes to imagine himself as your night in shining armor

At times like that he likes being the big spoon, or in any position with him holding you, or having you in his lap

It makes him feel like he has someone to protect

He is also easy to fluster, often blushing at compliments and things like that

He will try to get you back, but end up stuttering so much he just gives up

Out of the two others in his post, he is probably the most anxious in a relationship

Since he is already anxious in general, of course he is going to worry about how he is doing

He might refuse to vent to you about it, and instead bottle his emotions up inside, but he suffers from the asking-for-help-is-for-the-weak complex (idk if there is a name for that fhalsjfhskxn)

Sometimes if he bottles them up for too long he gets stressed and grumpy, but you should know how to deal with that since he is pretty much always grumpy in the mornings

With time, he will be able to open up to you, and soon you become the person he trusts most

Shunsuke sees you as an equal, no one "wears the pants" in the relationship

The two of you make decisions together, you're a team, and a darn good one

It's the two of you against the world!

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■

This was so fun to write! Thank you for requesting!

Whew, I am by no means a Mishima simp but writing for him made me feel happy, and Shunsuke and Mai were awesome to write for as well.

Hope you like it, and I'm sorry if it took a while :)

-Mod Hiyori

#yttd #your turn to die #your turn to die fluff #mishima kazumi #shunsuke hayasaka #mai tsurugi #yttd x reader #mod hiyori

[ihatebnha]

you know i cant tell if when you need comfort shoto would be like 🧍‍♂️ or actually help you. like i think i i i just dont know. i feel like maybe my head wants him to be good at it but he'll just be so awkward about it

LMFAOOO God, I know what you mean… Todoroki comforting you is such a weird thing to think about because I feel like he’s literally either the worst or best at it, and there’s no real in between. 

It definitely gets a little better the longer you’re together, but I doubt he ever really gets over the weirdness of actually just... listening to you vent and/or trying to figure out what to say beyond general statements of support.

I think a lot of his comforting tactics would either just be trying to reassure you that he’s there with you through thick and thin no matter what and that the issue itself will pass with time, or to offer some kind physical comfort in order to help soothe you... and while this is great when you really just need to spend some quality time with him (as he’ll both hold and listen to you for as long as you need, and his cuddles are probably bomb as fuck), it’s not like he’s really doing anything other than just letting you talk.  

I feel like this is because, when it actually comes down to having a conversation with him about whatever is troubling you, he mostly relies on going “uh huh, uh huh, uh huh” until you’re done... which sucks because, even though he does care, and in fact, cares A LOT, he just doesn’t really know what to say or do in response other than agree with you.

I also feel like he probably ends up defaulting to trying to “fix it” for you, a lot, too. I see him as the type to want to get rid of the problem at the source (throw hands), and definitely the guy who.... offers to do something about it for you... except that his response is usually weird and wayyyy out of pocket. 

You: ___ was mean to me at work again. 

Todoroki: What was their address again? Wait right here. 

You: 😦

It’s also funny because I can also see this manifesting as Todoroki being the boyfriend who thinks you can and should get away with murder. He will often just ignore the issue entirely and try to spoil you out of being upset. 

For example… 

You: Wow, my homework is really frustrating me right now 

Shoto: Let me to burn it for you. You don’t need to do homework, anyway, right? Actually… if you dropped out I would still support you. Monetarily. Whatever you need. 

You: WTF I literally just want help doing these problems. 

As you can see, it is pretty sweet… but most of the time it just doesn’t end up fixing anything because you’re not actually going to let him knock some sense into anyone or drop out of school. And when it comes down to it, after that point, Todoroki just goes back to being the guy who merely pats your back in sympathy.

Obviously, it’s great for when you want to shit on someone... but terrible for actually getting anything done.

The upside to this though, is if you ever get into these kinds of situations when he’s with you in public, he will address the problem and help you fix it immediately. You run into the person you were talking to him about last night who was bothering you, and he’s walking right up to them and telling them to “stop bothering you.” He picks you up from class and your teacher is walking out at the same moment, he’s having a conversation with them about the work load (or at least, trying to)... 

And overall, when you complain about ANYTHING, he’s instantly holding you and reassuring you that he’ll do anything to help you make it better... 

(And he does.) 

So, anyway... despite his awkwardness, I see his comforting skills as right in the middle, and that it all balances out eventually. Maybe... just stick to the cuddling though, Sho... 

#shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki x reader #todoroki #shouto todoroki x reader #todoroki thoughts #ask #luvkatsu #gosh im sorry this took so long to answer #idk whats been wrong with me lately #hope this is okay!!!

[asimpforarmin]

What’s Done is Done 💛

Content: Armin Arlert x Reader, Modern AU, italicized means flashback, bold is just something used to quote from a flashback.

Summary: After not talking to Armin for 2 years, you finally reconnect. Then, after a little bonding, he comes over and comforts you when you lose your job.

WC: 5,196

Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort, fluff.

Warnings: Financial struggle, alcohol and mentions of alcoholism, a little arguing, and probable grammatical errors. Let me know if I missed any!

A/n: Everyone in the story is above drinking age. Yes, I did listen to Nobody by Mitski slowed down with reverb while making this, thanks for asking. This is really just a vent fic for me, I’ve just been daydreaming for hours about how I just want to be held and comforted by Armin. This isn’t what’s happening to me irl, but I just felt like I needed a simple explanation for the fic so yea.

“Armin! Are you okay?! Where’d they get you?” you exclaimed, looking over Armin. He’d been beaten up by one of those punks who bullied him. You slung his arm around your shoulders, helping him stand up.

“I’m fine!” he says loudly, brushing you off and sitting back down.

“Hey, Armin, what’s wrong?” you ask in a softer tone. You bend down next to him. He’s sitting with his knees clutched against his chest, head down.

He looks up at you, tears in his eyes. “I’m nothing but a burden to you. You, Eren, and Mikasa are always having to come to my rescue.”

“Armin,” you take him into your arms, holding him tight, “It’s not an inconvenience to us. We’re happy to make sure you’re safe.” He wraps his arms around your torso, head resting on your shoulder.

He sniffles, “I’m sorry.”

You pull him closer and rub your hand along his back, “I’m glad to be here. There’s nothing I want more than for you to feel better.”

~~~~~

Armin was everything you wanted to be. He was smart, he had a good job even when attending college, and was able to support himself. You were just you, someone stuck in a never-ending dead end job with bad pay and no special degree to help you out. You were barely scraping by while he was fully capable of doing anything he wanted with his life. Not to mention he had a huge network of friends.

So there you sat, alone in your apartment with the lights off and the windows open, blowing the curtains around slightly. The only thing illuminating the room being the small blue screen of your tv and the ambient nighttime lights of the city outside.

You sat up on the couch, looking at your phone. You went onto twitter only to see Armin and all his friends out doing something at a bar far away from you. You were never really close to many of his friends. You met Eren first, then, he introduced you to Armin. You and Armin hit it off pretty well and you got attached to him. He became your closest friend.

By the time you reached middle school, you and Armin were inseparable. He would obviously spend time with other friends, but he always made time for just you and him.

By highschool, it was clear to everyone around that you two liked each other. You two would blush whenever the other was near, would sit super close, share food, it was almost like you were a couple without admitting to it.

When highschool ended, Armin was so excited to show you his acceptance letter into the college he would be attending. You were hyped up too, until you noticed it was in another state. You were still happy for him, but it would just mean you wouldn’t be able to see each other as often.

You managed to find an apartment only an hour away from him. It wasn’t anything nice, but it was in your budget, and was closer to his college than your last home. In the beginning, you two would video call a lot, especially after classes. You did almost every day. Then, that turned into every week, every two weeks, every month, then you both just stopped around the one year mark.  

He had changed too, not in a bad way though. He had cut his hair, got new friends, and was a lot more social. He still had his old nerdy interests, but he wasn’t the same.

Meanwhile, you desperately tried to get into any college or higher education you could, not even living at this point, just trying to survive. You had two jobs, a cashier in a gas station and a barista at a quaint little coffee shop, but you were still struggling.

You couldn’t get enough money to leave and go to a cheaper place to live. So you slaved away, trying your best to make a decent sum every week.

You wanted to see your best friend again so badly, but you just didn’t know how to reach out. He would give you the motivation you needed to keep going, to try to do something with your life by just being there. The thing is, you’ve drifted so far apart that you were clueless on how to ask without being weird or needy.

You set your glass of ice water on the coffee table in front of you. You looked at it for a moment, thinking of what it could be instead. You were only dressed in a t-shirt and shorts, but you threw on a hoodie and a pair of sandals. You grabbed your keys and phone, you were going out, to a random bar nearby to be exact.

So what if it wasn’t healthy? It’s not like you did it every night, and it wouldn’t drain you for too long. You went down to ground floor and started walking. You didn’t own a car, and even if you did, you probably wouldn’t be able to drive it back.

You walked for a little bit, reaching the building. You went inside and sat at the bar. It wasn’t a huge place, but it wasn’t tiny either. It was quiet though. The only sounds were random people hanging out in the corner, jazz playing over the speakers, and the other lonely people drowning in their sorrows who had it worse than you.

You ordered a drink and looked at your reflection in the glass. You looked like and felt like an utter mess. You didn’t know what you were doing anymore. You took a sip.

The sound of everything else happening was a cruel reminder that life goes on even when you’re at your lowest. The people going in and out of the bar will never know what you’re going through. Time doesn’t care about how you feel and it ever will. But you can try to slow it down a bit with another drink.

As soon as the bartender gives it to you, you see an arm to the left of you. “What’s cookin’ good-lookin?” a man says. You can tell he’s tipsy.

You look up at him and see a familiar face. “Jean?” you inquire, unsure if you’re mistaken. He was one of Armin’s friends he met in university. You never met him, but Armin talked to you about him when you used to call and makes a lot of appearances on his twitter.

He gulps, not knowing who you are. “Yeah actually, who’s asking?”

“I’m- I used to be Armin’s friend,” you say as you stick your hand out. He shakes it. “My name’s Y/n.”

“Oh I see.” He leans on the bar and orders a shot. “Y’know I always wondered who you were. Armin used to never shut up about you. Now, it’s almost like he’s forgotten about you.”

Even though he’s drunkenly blunt, those words still hurt. That just goes to show he’s moved on from you. You look back into your glass, wondering if you should just down it and get out of here.

Then you hear giggles and look over. You see Sasha laughing at Connie punching the air, clearly snockered. You’ve talked to both of them before, but not too much.

You decide you won’t down your drink, instead sliding it over to Jean and paying.

You stand up, wanting to go home before the alcohol kicks in too much. You had an alright tolerance but you wanted to make sure you made it home first. Plus, what were they doing so far out here? Surely they were barhopping. The others would come in soon anyways.

You hear a drunk Jean whine as you walk away, falling off the barstool. You push open the doors, only to be met with those blue eyes you haven’t seen in person in for over a year and a half. They widen looking at you.

“Y/n?” he asks, more shocked than you. You realize Eren and Mikasa are there too.

“Hi,” you say quietly, pulling up your hood and pushing through them.

“W-Wait-“ he’s cut off by Eren dragging him into the bar.

You start sulking back towards your apartment. You feel defeated. Even though he barely said anything to you, that made you start thinking about all the conversations you had when you were younger.

You get halfway down the block and realize you forgot your stupid keys. You quickly turn around, not wanting anyone else to take them. As you look back, you see Armin a few yards away from you. He sticks his hand out, giving you your keys.

“Been a while, hasn’t it?”

“Yeah, it sure has.” You walk up and snatch the keys out of his hand, not in the mood for a conversation with him. You weren’t mad at him, rather with yourself for not knowing how to talk to him.

You turn away and start walking again, when he says, “I’m sorry Y/n.” You stop dead in your tracks, glaring back at him.

“Of course you are, even after two years of not talking to me,” you raise your voice. Why were you saying this? This wasn’t like you. It wasn’t his fault either.

Armin looks down and grabs his wrist, keeping his arms together. “I’m sorry,” was all he could say again. “I knew I should have said something, I just didn’t know how.” You heard how his voice broke slightly, but you couldn’t see his face. “You were always there for me and I just brushed you off.”

~~~~~

Armin rushed to his math class. He knew he was going to be late but only by a few minutes if he was quick. You were also running late, going to the class down the hall from him. Armin opened the door.

“You’re late, Arlert,” the teacher replied immediately.

“Sorry sir, I-“ Armin was cut off by you speaking.

“He was helping me get my locker unjammed sir,” you say, lying, but covering for him.

The teacher nods, “Sit down, I’ll let this one slide.” Armin smiles at you and you give him a thumbs up before continuing to your classes.

~~~~~

You stand there, not sure of what to say.

“I took you for granted,” he continues. You wanted to yell at him, but it wasn’t his fault. You didn’t blame him. These things happen, that’s just how life goes.

He looked up at you, he was crying. Not too much, but his cheeks were red and they had tears running down them. Your eyes started to water just at the sight of this.

Before he could speak anymore, you walked closer to him. You reached your hand up to cup his cheek. “Don’t sweat it,” you say shakily.

Neither of you knew what to say, but if one of you didn’t say something, it was just going to go back to how it was before.

You’re the one to crack first. You wrap your arms around his waist, head in the crook of his neck. “I’ve missed you so much,” you say, crying into his neck.

“I-I’ve missed you too,” he admits. And just like that, it feels like a weight’s been lifted off your shoulders. He wraps his arms around you and lightly cries onto your shoulder.

It’s been a long time since you’ve spoken to each other, let alone touched each other. “I’m sorry.”

You pull back from him a bit, “Don’t be, it’s not your fault,” you smile up at him.

He lets you go, wiping his tears away, while you do the same.

“I-I should get back home,” you say, hoping he’ll propose something to make the night flip around. But he doesn’t.

“Yeah, I should get back too. Oh uh, do you want my new number?”

You perk up immediately to his suggestion. “Yeah! Of course!” You take your phone out, giving it to him. Once he types his number in, you give him yours.

You both say your goodbyes and head in opposite directions.

~~~~~

Over the next couple of months, you and Armin start to get in touch again. You can’t visit each other that often because of how far apart you are, but you try to every other weekend. Every time you can see him though, it’s a pleasure. Going to bookstores or libraries to be bookworms together or just getting food, every moment was bliss.

Your feelings for him started to come back too. This time, you have a pretty good feeling he likes you back, but you weren’t completely sure, so you didn’t say anything.

You two started video calling again, this time at least a little bit every evening with little to no exception. You both adored each other and loved geeking out together about things.

But you still had to work. You didn’t bring up anything about your struggles to him, he probably didn’t want to hear and you don’t want to be a burden.

That is, until you got laid off from both of your jobs in the same week. It was the end of the week and the coffee shop you worked at had gone out of business and the gas station found someone to do your job for less money.

You came home that day and just dropped to the floor crying. You didn’t know what to do. You were stuck with no job after barely getting by and all you could do was just sob as it felt like the world crumbled around you. You were completely distraught.

“Shut up!” you hear your neighbor yell as he bangs on the wall separating your rooms. You choke back your cries and pick yourself up to just curl up in your bed, sobbing into a pillow.

You suddenly wake up to the sound of your phone ringing. You drag yourself out of bed and rummage through your bag. You find your phone, slide back into bed, pick up, and turn your camera off.

“Hey Y/n!” Armin exclaims. He sounds so happy to see you.

“Hey,” you try to sound fine, but your voice cracks and you sniffle a little.

Armin takes note of it, “Why’s your camera off?” he asks inquisitively.

“It’s nothing,” you reply, wanting him to just take over the conversation and tell you about his day.

“Are you okay Y/n?”

“Just ignore it, I just woke up.” He takes a minute to try to figure out how to respond. “Just uh- How was your day?” you ask quickly, trying to change the subject.

He cautiously talks to you about it, knowing something’s up. You put in some headphones so you can have him right in your ears and just lay on your bed.

He tells you about the quiz he had that day, how Eren got into a fight, how spring break started, and it starts to calm you down, just having someone talk so casually to you like you’re having a normal conversation.

“So, how was your day?” he asks you in return. That snaps you out of it, you start crying again. You mute your mic and try to get your composure back.

“Y/n? Oh, you’re muted? Are you okay? Tell me what’s wrong.” His voice was low and considerate, trying to help calm you down. “I don’t mind, if you want to talk about it, we can. If not that’s fine too.”

You unmute your mic, “I’m tired,” you say, voice breaking as you speak.

“Hey, that’s alright, tired of what?” he asks you.

“I don’t have a job anymore, and I’m barely getting by. I just want a steady income or a new opportunity,” you say, getting more and more unconsolable by the second.

Armin always has his ways though, “Hey, you’re going to be okay. What happened?”

You sniffle and take a deep breath. “Well this coffee shop I worked for went out of business and-“ you take a second to sniffle and cough, “I got fired from the gas station I worked at.”

“You were working two jobs?” He’s a little shocked, but doesn’t act like it. He doesn’t want to throw you off your train of thought. You nod like he can see you, then make a sound of affirmation.

“You’re gonna be okay,” he says. He sounds calm and collected, trying to just make you feel better. His voice is quiet and comforting.

“I-If it isn’t too much to ask, Armin, could you come over tomorrow? I just wanna hang out with you,” you say.

Armin takes a minute, thinking of what to say. “I can come over tonight if you want.”

You want him to, you really do, but you say, “It’s a long drive and it’s the middle of the night, Armin.”

“Hey, it’s alright. It’s the least I can do.” You try to convince him otherwise but he’s already hung up. You pull your legs to your chest and put your head down. You don’t know what you’re doing. You’re not worth his time. He’s going to have to drive an hour just to get to where you are.

After a couple minutes, you hear your phone ringing again. It’s him. You pick up.

“Hey, I’m in the car now,” he said.

“Armin, I’m too far from you. You’ll have to drive 2 hours tonight, just to get back and forth.

“Then I’ll just stay the night with you.” You were a little shocked by him just saying that, but you welcomed it.

“I know you want to be here for me now, but you don’t have to drive an hour in the middle of the night just to comfort me.”

“Just an hour? So you’re agreeing I can stay over?” He was more lighthearted now, trying to cheer you up.

You sigh, say, “I guess” and lightly chuckle.

“It’ll be just like the sleepovers we had when we were younger.”

~~~~~

“Hold still!” you said, “You’re gonna make me mess up.” You were sitting criss cross with Armin on your bedroom floor, painting his nails a light blue color.

“Hey, you’re the reason you have that streak going halfway up your finger, you couldn’t hold still either.” You chuckled, looking down at your fingernails he just painted.

“Oh well, what’s done is done,” you say, putting the brush back in the bottle. “Tada!”

He looks down at his nails, then blows on them to try to get the polish to dry quicker. “They look great.” You look at him and smile, and he does too, but his smile soon fades into a frown.

“What’s wrong?” you say, putting the polish away and sitting next to him.

“People are gonna make fun of me because of this.”

“Hey, don’t think that way, if they do, I’ll beat ‘em up!” you smile, making a fist with your hand.

“Y/n, no,” he looks at you, trying to get you to back down.

“Okay fine, only if they hit you first.”

“You’re going to get yourself hurt,” he raises his voice.

Then you hear a voice from downstairs, “Go to bed kids!” You sigh, getting up and reaching your hand out for Armin.

“I’ll be okay.” He takes your hand, standing up. He goes over to his bag as you climb into your bed.

You yawn, “What do you have there?”

“A book and a flashlight. I hope you don’t mind. If you do I’ll just put them away.”

“No, it’s okay. What book?” He moves a little closer to you, showing you the cover with a smile on his face. He sits next to you and starts going on about the plot and all the characters, flipping through the pages showing you his favorite parts.

After a while he’s reading it to you, trying to keep quiet because he doesn’t want anyone to know you’re both still up. He’s getting to a part he’s quite passionate about when he looks at you. You’re half asleep under your blanket, trying to keep your eyes open.

He stops reading for a moment, “Sorry I’m boring you, I’ll go to sleep.” He goes to his makeshift bed, a pile of blankets with a ton of pillows underneath, and his sleeping bag on top. It’s just a few feet away from your bed.

You sit up a little, rubbing your eyes. “It’s not boring at all. It’s quite relaxing actually.” You wrap the blanket higher up on your body, before laying on your bed to look at him. “Tell me more,” you say.

He smiles. He turns the light off and his flashlight on, getting under the covers and flipping through his book to find the good part. He starts reading again, in a hushed voice. You cuddle up against your pillow, watching him.

He looks so absorbed in the world of that book. Reading you a chapter, occasionally pausing to tell you context since you haven’t read it. He’s smiling throughout it all.

You close your eyes, listening to him continue. Soon enough, you’re asleep. He falls asleep shortly after.

~~~~~

“Oh yeah, I remember those,” you say wiping your eyes and smiling. “You gonna paint my nails again?”

“Only if you let me read to you,” he says.

“Of course you can.” You two continue just making small talk for a while, until he pulls into a gas station.

“Well, I’m gonna hang up for now, okay?” he asks you.

“Okay,” you say, pulling your blanket closer to your body.

“I’ll be right over.”

“Alright,” you say. He’s about to hang up when you say, “Wait.” He stops what he’s doing and puts his phone back up to his ear. “I- I love you, Armin.”

He pauses for a moment. “I love you too, Y/n,” he says, before hanging up.

With a blush across your face, you stare up at your ceiling. He’s calmed you down so much by just talking to you over the phone. You get up, getting changed out of your work clothes. Not into anything fancy, but just a baggy t-shirt and a loose pair of pajama pants.

As you’re getting dressed, you’re thinking it over. Did he really mean what he said? Or if he did, did he mean it in a super friendly way? You don’t know how this is going to work out. On one hand, he could actually have feelings for you, or on the other you could have just made your whole relationship awkward.

“But what’s done is done,” you thought. There’s no going back now. You sat back down, waiting about 45 minutes. You wanted to cry but you felt too tired even for that.

You heard three loud knocks coming from your door.

“Y/n, it’s me,” you heard Armin say from outside. You get off your bed, go over to the door and unlock it. Armin’s standing there with a bag. “Hey,” he says, pulling you into a hug.

“I’ve missed you Armin,” you say. You don’t know why you said it, you were just talking to him.

“Well I’m here now,” he says, letting go of you. You step aside for him to come in. He goes to your coffee table and places the bag down. “While I was at the gas station, I picked you up some of these.” He takes out a plastic container filled with cookies, and a bottle of your favorite drink.

You walk closer picking up the drink, “You remembered.”

“Of course I did,” he says. He grabs your hand, “I never forgot about you.” That made you think back to what Jean had said to you at the bar. You put the drink back on the table and wrap your arms around Armin’s waist, burying your face in the crook of his neck. He puts his arms around your shoulders and holds you close. “It’s okay, Y/n, I’ll never leave again.”

He doesn’t end the hug, but once you’ve calmed down a little, he spaces you two apart so he can look at you. He says, “If you want we could pop a movie in, or I could paint your nails, or read to you, anything you want to do.”

“Could we just talk for a bit?” you ask, as he hangs his jacket over the side of the couch. You felt bad for dragging him out here if you were just going to watch a movie or something you could easily do by yourself. He nods and you bring him over to the couch.

You sit to the left of him and lean your head on his shoulder. “I don’t really know what I want to talk about, I think I’ve told you most of what’s happened.”

“That’s okay. So, what job do you think you’re gonna get after this?”

“I don’t know,” you say, looking down. “I don’t think I’ll find one easily.”

“I can help you find something in the morning if you want.”

“Sure.” You both stop talking for a minute.

“Do you have any other friends?” he asks.

“No, not really. I had some friends at the coffee shop I worked at, but now that’s gone out of business. I never really spent time with them either, they were just people I talked to.”

“If you want, I can introduce you to some of my friends. I know they’re far away, but if you’re not busy, we could meet halfway, maybe once a week.”

“Like at the bar?”

“Yeah, just a better place than that,” he says. You look up at him, and then down at his hand. You take it.

“Where do you want to go?” You look back up at him, waiting for a response. He blushes as you hold his hand, looking away.

“Well if it’s all of us, some of my friends will probably want to go to a club or something, but if that’s too much, we can just go get food or see a movie.”

“What if it’s just you and me?” He looks back at you, cheeks still flushed. “Do you want to go the library or something at some point?”

“Sure,” he says. You’re thinking for a moment. You’re holding hands with your best friend while your head is on his shoulder, after he drove an hour just to comfort you. You were gonna have to tell him at some point. He wouldn’t just confess to you.

You start to get tired, it was relaxing to be in this position. You yawn, getting the attention of Armin.

“You should go to bed.”

“I’m not that tired, plus you just got here.”

“That’s alright, I don’t mind. And I bet you are tired. You’ve been crying a lot today.” He brushes some hair out of your face, stands up, and takes both of your hands. “Come on, you need to sleep.”

You both part hands and you go to the bathroom for a moment to wash up. When you come out, Armin’s checking his phone with his jacket over his arm.

“Guess I’ll be on my way,” he says.

“Wait, I thought you were staying?” you ask confused. You wanted him to stay.

“Do you want me to? I kind of just said I was without asking you.”

You go closer to him, “Well I made you come all the way out here, so the least I can do is let you stay.”

“You didn’t make me, Y/n, I chose to come.” He puts his phone in his pocket.

“I don’t know, I just feel like I’m burdening you.”

“Y/n,” he takes both of your hands in his own, “There’s nothing I want more than for you to feel better.”

“God, you even remember that.” You look down, starting to feel your eyes water.

“Hey, don’t cry,” he says, wiping a tear from your cheek. You look back up at him, he’s concerned, but he’s smiling at you.

You let go of his hands and hug him. “I love you, Armin,” you say, “and I mean it.” He quickly puts his arms around you, while you let out a shaky breath. You continue, “I have since middle school, it’s not just from this.”

He puts his face in your neck, starting to tear up. “I have too,” he says with a quavering voice. You two stand there, overcome with emotion, holding each other. You pull back for a moment, cupping his face and brushing a tear off his cheek. “I love you, Y/n.”

You smile up at him, still while blubbering. You pull him back and you both rock each other for a moment.

“Come on, let’s go to bed,” you say, leading him to your bed. He puts his jacket over your chair and his phone on your nightstand. Once he’s done, you already have your legs under the covers. You open your arms and he climbs in next to you. He hugs you, then you both lay on your sides, facing each other.

You reach for his cheek again, just holding it. “God, you look so handsome.”

“Thank you,” he says, grabbing a hold of your hand. “You look stunning.” You smile and let out a little chuckle.

“I love you,” you say again. God, you’d have never thought you’d be saying this to him, especially tonight.

“I love you too.” It was a short and simple phrase but it made your cheeks darken and you felt butterflies in your stomach. You lean a little bit forward, kissing him. You both close your eyes as he kisses back.

After a couple seconds, you both part. He pulls the blanket over you, wrapping you in it. “Goodnight,” he says, turning the light off.

“Goodnight.”

~~~~~

You open your eyes, to see that no one’s there. The other side of the bed is empty. You sit up a little, before smelling food cooking from the kitchen.

After around 15 minutes of just laying in bed, you get up and go see what’s cooking. Armin’s at your oven, pulling muffins out of it.

He turns around to see you, a smile on his face. “Good morning!” He starts putting some of the muffins on a cooling rack, “How did you sleep?”

“Good,” you say, sitting at the table.

“That’s good. I used some mix from your cupboard, I hope you don’t mind.” He takes some of the muffins and puts them on plates for the both of you.

“It’s fine,” you yawn and look down at the table. There’s a newspaper in front of you.

Armin comes over to the table and places one plate in front of the newspaper. “Look at the bottom.” You look down the newspaper and see an ad for some small shop that’s hiring. “Thought maybe you’d be interested.”

“Thanks,” you say as he sits down. “So, are we a thing now?” you ask shyly, looking up at him.

“Yea, if you’re interested.”

“Of course I am.”

“Well so am I,” he giggles.

You start reading into the newspaper a little more. What’s done is done, and you’re happy about it.

#tw alcohol #tw: alcohol #armin arlert x reader #armin x reader #attack on titan x reader #shingeki no kyojin x reader #angst #hurt/comfort #fluff #attack on titan fanfiction

[celestep]

okay I found an older snippet and I may be considering...writing again??

If I do write more, I think it would have to be AU but here's an older snippet that is not!

Note: Even though this is a Jily snippet, it's a convo between Lily and Sirius

“Oi! Evans!”

Lily hardly registered the sound of her name. She had been in a terrible fog recently, and the lack of sleep certainly wasn’t helping.

“Evans! Lily Evans!”

She stopped walking and turned to see Sirius Black jogging towards her.

“Something I can do for you, Black?” She asked flatly.

“What are you up to right now?” He asked, by way of answering her question.

“Er, free period. Was going to try to catch up on reading for Charms...”

“You mean, like you tried to this morning before breakfast? I’m pretty sure you spent an hour on the same paragraph.”

“Did Potter tell you that? Or has watching me silently become a group activity?”

“James will be delighted and embarrassed to know you’ve clocked that, so cheers. I’d be happy to make the case for my best mate and to explain his creepy new choice of courtship, but that’s not why I’m here.” Sirius rattled off, smirking.

“Oh? And why are you here?” Lily asked, slightly exasperated.

“You need to have a laugh with a mate. Or a deep conversation with a mate. Whatever you want, really. I just know you’ve been a real mess lately,” he paused slightly, perhaps expecting a telling off. All he got was a slight shrug of agreement from Lily. “And I know what it’s like, being a real mess. And I know that what you need is to spend your free period with a mate.”

“And have you brought me one? Perhaps your best mate?”

“Ah no, James would be rubbish right now. We voted and your mate is me!”

“You. You, Sirius Black, are going to pal around with me?” Lily asked, cocking an eyebrow. “You are aware we hardly speak, aren’t you, Black?”

“Yes, yes, that point was made. I certainly thought Remus would be the clear choice, but it was an unanimous decision by the end. We were meant to be friends, Evans.”

“Oh, really?” Lily asked, putting her book in her bag. “Also...unanimous? Remus voted? For you?”

“Once again, I, too, was surprised, but now you’re stuck with me, Evans. So you should decide what you’re more in the mood for, complete distraction or deep conversation?”

“Is my Charms reading an option?”

“Nope!” Sirius said grinning. “Although we could flip a coin, if you’re terribly torn.”

“Ah, tempting. But no, I suppose I pick deep conversation, as I hardly trust whatever you have up your sleeve as a distraction. Although, if we’re to have a deep conversation, may I request a butter beer, or perhaps something stiffer.”

“Miss Evans!” Sirius gasped in mock indignation. “I am shocked that you would dare ingest alcohol before classes are done for the day.”

“I mean, I only have history of magic left. While I usually wouldn't, I hardly feel that sobriety is crucial. If anything, being a little tipsy might make class slightly more interesting.”

“Positively scandalous.” Sirius said, grinning at her. She smiled back despite herself. “Lucky for you, Miss Prefect, I happen to have a wee bit of fire whiskey on me at the moment.”

He reached into his rucksack and paused for a moment, staring hard at Lily.

“This isn’t some trick where you’ll write me up after, is it?”

“No,” Lily smiled again. “Although I reserve the right to write you up depending on how this goes.”

“Ah, fair enough. No faith in me whatsoever.”

“Not no faith. Just well-informed faith. Faith on top of a first-hand knowledge of your previous behavior.” Lily teased.

“Yes, yes. I’ve been very bad. I’m well aware.” Sirius said, handing a flask over to Lily. The flask had been a Christmas present from Peter and Sirius had taken to carrying it everywhere, although this was the first time in months he’d actually broken it out to drink. Lily took a long swig and made a scrunched up face.

“Oh, Merlin,” she sputtered, passing the flask back. Sirius took a drink and, to Lily’s enjoyment, made an equally silly face. He passed it back to her and they walked out to the courtyard together, passing the flask back and forth and laughing at each other’s attempts to drink with any dignity.

“Okay. So what’s been going on with you lately?” Sirius asked, offering her the final sip from the flask. He watched as she took the flask and paused, sighing deeply before throwing her head back to finish the drink off. She cringed and shook her head.

“Where to start?” She asked, laughing drily. “Er, well. I have no friends. Well, you know that or you wouldn’t be here.”

Sirius thought about jumping in to contradict her but decided to wait and see if she’d keep talking.

“Let’s see, my sister hates me. I’m absolute crap at transfiguration. And our world seems to be pretty much headed into straight out war, so there’s that.”

Sirius nodded and looked at her. “Okay,” he said. “Now, some of that is definitely true. But, and I mean this with the utmost deference to your own experience, you know some of that is total rubbish.”

“We are definitely heading into a war-“

“Oh, yeah, that’s true.” Sirius said. “Sorry, I’ll clarify. You do have friends, although I will concede that you’ve lost your best mate, and that - despite my...opinion of him - is bloody awful. And you’re not absolute crap at Transfiguration.”

Lily laughed a little, in spite of herself. She looked down and asked quietly, “It is bloody awful.”

Sirius simply nodded and waited. She was amazed at how easy it was to talk to him and felt that it couldn’t be solely due to the fire whiskey.

“Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret cutting ties with him. I don’t care how shit the two of you can be to him, no amount of provocation should have made him say what he said. And we’re not going to be in school much longer - soon the sides we’ve picked aren’t just about who we sit with, they’re life or death. Especially for me.” She sat in silence for a moment. “And it wasn’t a healthy relationship. Not for a long time. You know, he always made me feel a little foolish for wanting to be friends with anyone in Gryffindor. It’s why - you’re wrong, you know. Alice and Mary and Marlene and all them, they aren’t my friends. I mean, I like them and they like me but they’re a group. They’re friends and I’m just... there.”

“To mimic my best mate for a moment, you, Lily Evans, are never just there. You may not be close with them but everyone wants to be friends with you. You’re almost irritatingly likable. They’ve just been waiting for you to ask.”

“My goodness. Sirius Black, that sounded like a compliment.”

“Eh, you don’t spend as much time with James as I do and not wind up with some favorable opinions of you. And, er, if you don’t mind my saying so, he’s a pretty clear solution to your transfiguration problem. He’s top in the year there and a pretty good teacher as long as you can keep him in line, which obviously you have no issue with.”

“Well yes, I did think about asking Potter but he’s been - as I mentioned before - rather quiet lately. He, er.... he stares quite a bit. But he hasn’t spoken to me since, well, last year at the lake.”

Lily glanced at Sirius to see if she could read his expression. She hadn’t meant to broach the subject but she felt as though Potter was scared of her. While she certainly didn’t miss his constant badgering for her to go out with him, she didn’t enjoy this other extreme. James was in every class with her and best friends with one of the few people she felt remotely close to anymore. Two of them, now, I suppose, She thought to herself. Sirius seemed to be debating saying something. Lily shook her head lightly.

“They’ve just been waiting for me to ask? What does that mean? I just walk up to Mary MacDonald and say, ‘Hullo there, Mary. I’m finally ready to be close with you all. You may welcome me into your friend group now’?”

Sirius laughed “Well first of all, I’d lead with McKinnon. I’d say you could probably lose the speech and maybe, I dunno, just sit with her in Potions.”

“Sit with Marlene in Potions.”

“Yeah, well. I happen to know that Marlene is a bit desperate for a new Potions partner. That’s one of the classes Mary and Alice are partners for. Marlene used to sit with Worthington, but he’s started seeing that other Ravenclaw, Florence something, so now they want to sit together. But Marlene doesn’t want to get stuck with anyone who’s naff at Potions.”

Lily blinked. “I didn’t realize there was so much to know about our seating in Potions. How do you know all this?”

“Partially because I get bored easily, partially because Marlene and I have gotten a bit, er, closer recently.”

“Ah, I see.” Lily grinned. “And why haven’t you partnered up with her, then?”

“As I said,” Sirius grinned back. “She doesn’t want someone who’s naff at Potions. I’m easily distracted. She likes to actually, you know, work. Like a certain swotty Prefect I know...” He waggled his eyebrows at Lily and she smiled.

“All right. I’ll sit with Marlene in Potions.”

“Excellent. One problem solved.”

“Indeed.”

“Now I don’t know much about your sister,” Sirius said, changing the subject and leaning against the nearest arch. Lily was a bit surprised that he’d circled back to her family before the unfinished discussion of James Potter. “But I do know a lot about hateful family members. So while I can’t necessarily fix this one, I can at least commiserate.”

“Ah, yes. Of course that’s why Remus voted for you.”

“It certainly was.”

“Remus always says an unsolvable problem is only tolerable with company. And I know how frustrating he finds venting to someone who can’t, er, fully relate. I think he once said ‘empathy can only go so far’ on a particularly snippy day.”

“Ah,” Sirius said, narrowing his eyes for a moment. Lily realized he was trying to suss out how much she knew about Remus.

“Though I imagine it’s a little easier to find someone else with a contentious family life than someone who could, you know, fully relate to Remus.”

“So you do know.” Sirius said, suddenly a little uncertain and untrusting. “Snape told you, I suppose?”

“Oh I guessed long before and, to be fair, he never actually confirmed it. I was sure you all knew I knew!”

“You guessed it?” Sirius sounded half impressed, half terrified.

“Don’t worry, I truly don’t think anyone else has. It took Sev forever to get there and he was working at it for ages. Although I will admit he may have gotten it a bit faster had I not been throwing him off course a bit. But still,” she continued, eager to reassure Sirius, “I have never heard anyone else so much as suspect. Most people just feel badly about his mum and don’t want to bring it up. Right clever choice If you ask me.”

“How did you guess? When did you guess? And why on earth would you think we knew?” Sirius sputtered.

“To answer your first two questions, I had a bit of a crush on Remus during fourth year. We sat together in Ancient Runes, and we studied together,” she found herself blushing slightly even though she hadn’t fancied Remus in years. Sirius looked deeply amused but mostly still focused on how she uncovered such a secret. “And, as I was perhaps a tad more focused on him, I noticed that his mum’s illness always lined up with the full moon. And then I noticed a new scar and put together a pretty good guess. I wasn’t quite certain until fifth year, because we do our rounds together. He was always weak and sick before the moon and often injured after. And I assumed you knew because I cover for him whenever the full moon comes up. I mean, I didn’t think you all thought I was suddenly happy to lie to McGonagall and Dumbledore for no reason.”

“Er, no. I mean, I suppose Remus was a little surprised at first but then James wouldn’t shut up about how ‘of course you’d cover because you’re a great friend and how lucky Remus was to have you as a friend and on and on’ so we just never brought it up again.”

Lily blushed a little again, and prayed Sirius didn’t notice. He did.

#jily #snippet

[ieattaperecorders]

Something's Different About You Lately - Epilogue: Borrowed Time

Life goes on, impossibly.

Read on Ao3

---

Martin shifted the bag of groceries in his arms as he climbed the stairs, still feeling a bit nervous.

The dinner had been Jon's idea – his O&M instructor was covering kitchen skills, and he'd thought it would be fun for the two of them to try making something together. The recipe had sounded a little elaborate to Martin, who'd protested that he didn't cook much, but Jon promised that it wasn't beyond them. He added that Martin was ‘perfectly capable' in the kitchen anyway, and said it with such prim, knowing confidence that Martin hadn't even bothered to ask. Before he knew it, he was writing down a list of ingredients to bring over.

He supposed that was just going to keep happening, Jon telling him things about himself. It was . . . strange. Sometimes it was endearing, sometimes just annoying. Occasionally it made him feel sentimental and a little bit sad in a way he couldn't put his finger on.

The door to the flat opened after a moment of knocking, and he smiled as Jon appeared.

"Hi Jon, it's Martin," he said. He'd read online it was polite to say your name, to not assume the other person will recognize your voice. "I've got the groceries."

"I know it's you, Martin." His tone was light and a little condescending, and Martin felt heat rise to his ears. "Come on inside. You know where the kitchen is."

Martin slipped past him and set down the bag, pulling things out and arranging them on the counter as Jon followed him to the kitchen.

"The store was out of chili paste," he mentioned.

Jon shrugged. "We'll improvise, then."

"If you say so."

Jon began taking out cookware, placing things down wherever he found counter space. "Do anything interesting today?" he asked, over the clatter of pans.

"Not especially. Filled out a few applications, then took a walk," he said. "Met a really friendly dog in the park."

"Flattered that you tore yourself away to come here."

"Wasn't by choice, her owner wouldn't let me keep her."

"How unreasonable."

It was weird, not having to worry so much about money. Not that Martin was complaining of course, but there was still a voice in his head telling him he was being too slow and selective in his job search, that it was lazy of him. And he felt anxious dipping into the new funds too much.

He'd just about gone into conniptions when Sasha told him what she'd done while she'd been fiddling with Elias's computer. Embezzlement might not have been an escalation when they were already committing arson, but they could still get caught, and wouldn't a financial windfall point a lot of suspicion towards them? But she kept assuring him that it was untraceable, some hidden fund Elias had, ready to be drawn on by anyone with the account information. The running theory was that he'd been keeping it for his next identity, which . . . yeah, the less Martin thought about that, the better.

Fear of discovery aside, he couldn't deny it was nice having a buffer like this. There was space he'd never had before to think about where he wanted to be, what he wanted to do with himself. And with the bills taken care of, Jon could focus his time on recovering. At the urging of his O&M teacher (and some amount of prodding on Martin's end) he'd even started talking to a counselor every few weeks. It was ostensibly just about handling the emotions that come up with sudden, traumatic vision loss, and he doubted Jon would be discussing the more exotic traumas he'd been through. Still. It was probably good he had something like that.

They went about the business of prepping ingredients, talking idly about food, things they'd done in the past few days, updates from Tim and Sasha. Martin's initial nerves already dissolving into the steady flow of conversation. There was something comfortable, he reflected, in being around someone who was so comfortable with him.

"Would you mind--" Jon frowned, fiddling with the hob on the stove. "I've got this, I'm fairly sure. Just . . . make sure I keep the pan centered?"

"Sure."

He came to stand behind Jon, watching over his shoulder as he set the carefully oiled pan on the stove and turned on the heat. Martin was a terribly distracted spotter, his attention frequently straying from the pan to look at Jon's face, pinched slightly in concentration. There was a single bead of sesame oil on his cheek, and it made his intensely serious expression that much more charming.

Despite his concerns, Jon had the pan well handled as he heated the oil and added in the aromatics. Martin only noticed him drifting once, the flames going high on one side of the pan.

"A little left," he advised.

In a moment of impulse and bravery, Martin curved an arm around him – placing a hand on his elbow, then running it down his arm to cover Jon's hand with his own, guiding the pan carefully into place. Jon leaned back, fitting the curve of his body into Martin's and sighing deeply.

"God, I've missed this," Jon exhaled. "Just . . . cooking dinner with you. All these little domestic things."

His voice was so unselfconsciously fond. It made Martin dizzy, just how easily affection poured out of him.

In hindsight, at least part of Jon's strange, awkward behavior around Martin had been a result of him holding back, wary of letting his feelings show. He never held anything back now -- his demeanor going from nonchalant or haughty to unbelievably soft and loving at the slightest prompting. It still took Martin by surprise, inspiring so much unreserved affection in someone. It wasn't anything he'd usually associate with himself. It was strange, and lovely, and at times made him feel almost frighteningly powerful.

He leaned forward, kissing the soft skin just beside Jon's ear. Jon smiled, holding his pose for a moment before gradually returning his attention to the pan, shaking it gently to move the vegetables around. Martin kept a hand on his, now fully for the sake of touch rather than any pretense of assistance, letting Jon's movements guide them both.

"Did we cook together in that cabin a lot?" he asked.

Jon nodded. "It was one of a handful of things we could do that felt . . . well, like a date, I suppose. We couldn't really go anywhere since we were lying low. I mean, we could walk around the area, isolated as it was, but trips to the village were all short and functional. So preparing something elaborate together made an evening feel special," he smirked. "You used to get defensive, too, just like today . . . saying you didn't really cook, like you were trying to lower my expectations."

"In my defense, I never said I didn't cook, just . . . ." Not since mum left , he thought. "Not for a while."

"To be honest, we were both at a disadvantage in that kitchen," Jon continued. "There weren't a lot of modern conveniences there. The power came from a generator, and the stove was an ancient, wood-burning thing that neither of us quite knew what to do with at first. Took a lot of trial and error before we really managed."

"Sounds cozy."

"Oh yes. So cozy we almost suffocated ourselves before we figured out how to adjust the vents."

Martin smiled, listening to Jon describe the little kitchen in that place. The cabin in Scotland had supposedly been a remote safehouse the two of them laid low in, but the way Jon talked about it sometimes it might as well have been a romantic holiday retreat. He made it sound so nice that Martin once idly suggested they go see it someday. Jon had gone tense and quiet at that, had shaken his head and said softly that they had to stay far, far away from that place. That there was nothing good that happened there now.

Jon was mostly open about the things he remembered. But sometimes "open" meant he'd easily speak at length about something, and other times "open" meant he'd answer your questions with short, one-sentence explanations, volunteering nothing unless pushed. And anything about the police officers he'd apparently worked with fell solidly into the second category.

Sometimes it seemed like they might have been friends, but Jon was always adamant that no one ever try to contact them. Daisy in particular seemed hard to talk about. Martin did know about the coffin. Jon had told him in a soft, emotional voice how another Martin had stepped from his cloud of isolation to set out tape recorders calling him home, how it had been one of very few things that let Jon believe he hadn't given up on him yet. And he knew something had been different about Daisy after the coffin, some sinister force like the one that had kept them at the Institute had loosened its hold on her.

He also knew that Jon was terrified of her, that he said again and again she was too dangerous to go near. That something about her made him sad -- and, Martin suspected, guilty, though he wasn't sure why. It was a topic he'd decided not to push . . . if Jon ever wanted to talk more about it, he would in his own time.

There were other things, things closer to home for Martin that Jon had hesitated over. Once while he was recounting the events of those years he'd paused mid-sentence. Stammered that it wasn't all supernatural in nature and some of it may still happen, and was he sure he wanted to know everything? Martin imagined Jon thought he was being subtle, but it wasn't a hard guess.

He told Jon not to give him the date. It was obviously going to be within the next couple of years, there was no spitting out that apple of knowledge. But he didn't want to be able to mark it on his calendar.

It shouldn't have felt like news, that his mum was going to die soon. Shouldn't have been the uncomfortable weight in his chest that it was. She was ill, of course it was coming, it had been coming for a while, hadn't it? But maybe that was the problem. It had been ‘any day now' for such a long time, ‘any day' had stopped feeling like a reality. And he still wasn't sure what to do with this information, if it really changed anything. Should he try to get some sort of closure? How did you make the most of the time you had left with a person who refuses to see you?

Martin hadn't asked Jon how much he knew about his mum, that just wasn't a conversation he was eager to have. But the careful, hesitant way Jon talked around the subject suggested . . . something, at least. Just like how the gentle, quiet tone he got when he talked about the Lonely told Martin more than he really wanted to have explained.

There was only one thing Jon flatly refused to tell him about, and that was whatever Elias had done to him on the day of the Unknowing. When pushed, Jon had gone quiet for a while, then said he didn't remember. It had been a lie, and a bad one, and both of them knew it. But it was clear there was no point in asking for more.

"You like pizzelles, don't you?"

Jon's voice snapped Martin to the present. With a last squeeze of Martin's hand, he turned off the flame, moved away from the stove and over to the pantry.

"Um, dunno?" Martin said, pulling his thoughts back together. "Never tried them."

"Really?" Jon frowned, pausing halfway to the cabinet door. Then he shrugged. "Well, no matter. You will."

Martin rolled his eyes. Jon spoke with so much more authority than anyone deserved to hold over another person's cookie preferences, and he couldn't help feeling contrary.

"No. You stepped on a butterfly last week and set off a chain of events that forever changed my feelings on pizzelles, I hate them now."

"That's all right," Jon said, popping open the plastic package and arranging the cookies on a plate. "If you don't want these, there's also canned peaches for dessert."

"Oh, don't you dare --"

Jon snickered, picking out a broken piece of one of the large, thin cookies and holding it out, just short of passing it into Martin's mouth. With an annoyed grunt, Martin leaned forward, taking a bite.

Damn it. It was really, really good.

---

Jon sank into the couch, pleasantly full and a little bit tired. He leaned back and listened to the sound of running water coming from the next room.

Martin had insisted on doing the dishes, on the basis that Jon had done "all the real work" of cooking. He wasn't sure that was true, but didn't argue. Just asked that he leave everything in the drainboard when he was finished so Jon could put it away later. He knew he'd be frustrated for hours if the dishes weren't where he expected them to be.

There were so many frustrations in his life now. His O&M instructor had promised he'd learn new ways to move through the world, that in time the frustrations would be fewer and fewer, and he'd find himself capable of nearly everything he'd done before the loss of his sight. Jon believed her, but it didn't make the prospect of getting there any less daunting. Nor did it make the learning process any easier.

The worst were the things his instructor would never understand, that no resource or guidebook would mention. The dread that gripped him when he became disoriented and found a door where he wasn't expecting one. The phantom tickles on his body that prompted him to pat himself down for spiders again and again.

Still. He was alive. The others were freed from the institute, and he was there with them, to struggle and to mourn and to continue on.

A part of him would always fear it had been a mistake. That the Web, or the Eye, or some other power still had plans for him that would reach apotheosis someday. Maybe he saw the fear as vigilance, as though something was waiting for him to feel safe so that it could rip that security from him. And as long as he never allowed himself to be truly, entirely at ease, that day would never come.

Irrational, perhaps. But it was so hard to tell anymore which irrational fears were truly irrational, and which would one day manifest with teeth and claws.

Even if nothing ever came for him, they had only bought the world some time. One day, maybe soon, someone would figure it out and attempt a ritual again. Maybe there would be others out there who would catch it in time, postponing the end over and over, forever. Or maybe someone would do it next week, and Jon would be plunged along with everyone else into unspeakable suffering until Terminus claimed them all. He could follow Gertrude's path if he chose, devote his life to stopping rituals at the cost of everything he cared for. Even then one could slip past him, come from someplace he hadn't been watching, or had been made not to notice. At some point he was going to have to find a way to live with that knowledge.

He'd work on it. But for the moment . . . .

The sound of running water stopped. Jon smiled, scooting to make room on the couch, feeling the cushions sink and shift as they took the weight of another person. With a hmm that came out with more whine to it than he'd wanted, Jon found Martin's arm and tugged it towards him. With a quiet laugh, Martin obliged, leaning into him and resting his head against his chest.

"Better," Jon arranged their limbs more comfortably. Martin's hands were still cold, and he smelled faintly of dish soap.

"Glad to hear it."

Jon knew Martin found it amusing, how clingy he was. The first time he'd commented on it had been profoundly embarrassing. Part of it was just the way Jon was, but he also remembered the days after the Lonely. The skittish, uncertain moments of contact, the times when Martin stiffened at his touch but whimpered when he pulled away. The other days, when they could barely let go of one another, when Jon would plant himself beside Martin or wrap his arms over his shoulders, and he would relax into it, sighing with release. Both of them too grateful for the fragile miracle of each other's touch to consider breaking contact.

This Martin didn't remember those days, and if he ever sensed anything desperate or reverent in the way Jon clung, he didn't comment on it. Still, even if he found it funny, he didn't seem to mind how ardently Jon held on to him.

Jon moved a hand into the space between Martin's shoulder blades and scratched down his spine, the particular way he used to like. Jon felt him shiver with pleasure under the soothing contact, and a powerful warmth spread through him.

"God . . ." Martin whispered, "you really know everything about me, don't you?"

Jon snorted. "Hardly. In a very real way, we barely had time to get to know each other. And when we did, well . . . it was close by necessity. It was intimate, and intense. But there's still a great deal I've no idea about."

"You were never tempted to use those powers of omniscience to look inside my head?"

"Constantly," Jon said, with great seriousness. "But I never did. I promised."

Martin went quiet at that. Maybe Jon's reply had been a little intense, or maybe Martin hadn't actually realized that looking inside his head had been a possibility when he'd asked the question as a joke.

"Oh," he said eventually. "Um . . . good?"

"I have picked up a few things," Jon continued, speaking with quiet and fond admiration. "For example . . . I know you'd like a pet, but your landlord won't allow them so you keep plants instead. You can't say no to panhandlers. You have a favorite hoodie that you only wear when you're sad and need the comfort. You like old, careworn furniture, and rainy days, and sitcoms that were made before you were born. You're kind to people who aren't kind to you, but you never forget the unkindness."

"Wow. Okay," Martin made a soft noise, shifting in his arms, voice tight and quiet. "Okay. Y-You're, uh, probably going to kill me if you keep that up, you know."

"Trust me, you've survived worse."

He felt Martin move a little higher, slotting himself beside Jon and giving him a tight squeeze. Jon grinned as the breath was pushed out of him, all twenty-four of his ribs contracting at the assault.

That was another difference, one of dozens of subtle changes Jon couldn't keep his mind from analyzing. Martin wasn't ungentle, exactly. But he hugged Jon more tightly, shoved or poked him when he was annoyed, whereas the Martin in his memories had held back a little. Been more mindful of his strength, as if wary he might handle him too roughly. It had been subtle, a thing Jon hadn't even noticed until he had something to contrast it against.

It made sense, he supposed. The other Martin had seen Jon limp back to the institute with fresh wounds and new scars one too many times. This one didn't have to have those images in his head.

There were some things that were lost between them, Jon knew that. Memories too small and simple to explain, questions he couldn't ask anymore. Moments they would never share, both good and bad. But there was also so much they had gained. This Martin hadn't had an easy life, not by any measure. But he hadn't had to watch helplessly as the people around him died or disappeared or became monstrous. Hadn't been lost in grinning corridors, or attacked by Hopworth's hooligans, or made to feel the heat of the endless tenement fire. And for that, Jon was so, so grateful.

"You look thoughtful," Martin commented.

"Mmm," Jon sat quietly for a while sifting through his thoughts before speaking. "We should go to a movie sometime. When I'm up for going out out."

"That sounds less fun for you than me . . . ."

"Depends on the movie. I could listen, even without description. And I'd enjoy being with you," he said. "Or maybe a concert? Though I don't really know what sort of music you like . . . ."

"Really? There's actually a blank spot in your catalogue of Martin trivia?" he said sarcastically. "Surprised it never came up."

"You only ever used headphones at work," Jon bristled, feeling oddly defensive about it, "and we obviously couldn't bring our devices to the cabin. Too traceable."

"Hmm," there was a teasing smile in Martin's voice. "Don't know if I want to tell, now. Feels like I've got a secret."

"Oh, except . . . there was one song? I don't know the lyrics, but you used to hum it all the time in the cabin."

"What was it called?"

"I didn't actually ask. It sounded nice, though. Maybe we could listen to it together. . . "

"How'd it go, then?"

He hummed the tune from memory. It came easily to mind, connected as it was with images of Martin sipping tea or wiping down a countertop, a bright, easy smile on his face. After a moment, Martin burst out laughing.

"That's -- that's from a soap commercial!"

". . . What?"

"Floors and doors, walls and halls, Liquid Lather cleans them all," he spoke-sang along with the tune. "It was probably just stuck in my head."

Jon frowned, mildly disappointed. "Well. It sounded nice when you were humming it, anyway."

"God. If you want I can serenade you with an insurance advert sometime."

"No thank you."

"Or we could listen to your album from uni," he pushed, the satisfied smile in his voice growing.

"Thankfully we never recorded anything," Jon grinned ruefully, "so that's lost to time."

"Bet you could still sing some of it."

"Try me the next time I'm not expecting to live through the night."

Martin made a displeased sound at that, but said nothing.

"I'm sorry that you always have to come over here," Jon said. "I should probably be making more of an effort to get out of the flat. But it's so much still, even with a guide. I can do it if I have to, but I can't relax."

"C'mon . . . you know I don't mind, and even if I did it wouldn't be something to apologize for. You're going at your own pace."

"Suppose I'm just impatient with myself. It feels absurd, I've walked through a London warped by unfathomable terror, but now ordinary city life is overwhelming. I think I never understood how many people there are on every block until each one became another unpredictable factor to be aware of on my way to the damn corner store," he sighed. "It may be a while before I'm up for anything like a concert."

"It's alright," Martin gave his arm a gentle squeeze. "I'm good at waiting."

For a moment Jon's mind went to a dark, creaking bedroom, air heavy with dust and thick with terror. It's all right. I'm good at waiting. The same phrasing, almost the same tone. Maybe it was to be expected, little parallels like this. Given a person's linguistic habits and enough time it was probably inevitable, but every time something like it happened it floored Jon in the most wonderful way. Some small but meaningful part of the man he loved reflecting and echoing back at him.

If the world didn't end, if he didn't dissolve into spiders or die at the hands of some unfathomable terror, Jon swore someday he'd find the words for how moments like that made him feel. And if he had any courage left in him, he'd tell Martin about it.

"Though, as long as we're talking about that," Martin said, "I've been thinking . . . ."

"In general?" Jon teased.

"Sort of. I've been reading some stuff about adjusting to vision loss? And I know this is fast – well, maybe not fast to you – but it seems to me like it's probably easier, especially at first, if you've got a sighted person staying with you . . ."

He felt himself breathe in sharply, and Martin's words came faster, his tone careful.

"Not - not to do everything for you, of course! I know you can do things yourself. Just to make little things easier, and – you know, that aspect aside it – it might just be nice –"

"Yes," Jon said decisively.

"Because it isn't really just the vision thing – I mean, it's alright if you do need help but it's also alright if you don't – but there's other reasons – "

"My answer is yes."

A faint laugh came out of Martin and he slapped Jon's chest lightly. "Stop agreeing and let me finish."

"Sorry."

"I'm not suggesting moving in. That would be too fast, at least for me," he said. "I'd want to keep my own place, and I'd probably still spend some time there."

"Of course," Jon nodded solemnly. "Perfectly reasonable to want some space of your own."

"Yeah. But if it works for you, I thought I might get a bag together, y'know, just sort of stay for a while? I – hell, I wouldn't, uh, mind the excuse to cook more dinners with you? And I slept better than I had in a while the night I stayed over here."

"So did I."

"I just think it might be nice. If you think so too, of course."

There was a pause as Jon waited, not sure if Martin had more to say. After the silence had dragged on for a while, he spoke up. "Am I allowed to say yes now?"

Martin laughed, nodding against Jon's chest.

"Then yes. I'd be very happy to have you stay here with me."

"Cool. Cool . . . " Martin exhaled. " . . . I love you."

"And I love you."

"More than I'll ever know?"

There was a teasing smile in Martin as he echoed the words Jon had said to him back in the tunnel. Jon was quiet for a moment.

He'd meant those words when he'd said them. It hadn't been a romantic turn of phrase. He'd confessed his feelings in that moment with the understanding that Martin would never be able to see how deep they ran. That he could tell Martin he loved him, but he'd never be able to show him that. He wouldn't have the chance. He found Martin's cheek with a hand, turned his face towards him, then bent down and kissed him, once.

"No," he said. "Not if I can help it."

#tma fanfic #tma #jonmartin #food mention

[kirbyspits]

I hate how everyone blame mako for makorra being toxic but don’t hold Korra responsible for her role in it too. She accused him of conspiring behind her back, humiliated him in front of his coworkers, yelled at him, and flipped his desk over. Book 2 was a nightmare.

Part 1/2 Asks

Listen, Book 2 is dead to me. When antis say Korra is unlikable in Book 2, I can’t defend her. Korra’s stress and insecurities are so subtle and downplayed, it’s hard to even feel sympathetic towards her. Combative characters don’t normally bother me, but Korra was too much, especially since Mako also had no clue what to do. Korra’s the one who had over a decade of training and had all the old wise teachers. 

I only started tolerating their fights after catching one line that helped me understand how Korra spiraled into this raging bundle of blueness. She mentions being “locked up” and people telling her what’s best for her. So my headcanon is all those years in isolation with older men controlling every aspect of her life came to a head, and that took a major toll on her mental health. 

Book 2 was a missed opportunity to explore the confusion, loneliness, and isolation that comes with being the Avatar. The fights with Mako could have been more bearable because they’d make more sense, with those issues being the heart of the problem. However, since we already got into most of that in ATLA, I guess Bryke wanted to focus on spirits, the spiritual world, and frankly speaking, breaking up Mako and Korra. 

So let’s get into Makorra Book 2, specifically before Mako’s lie, because I have more thoughts about that. Ngl, I’ve been dreading writing about this. I get so frustrated and sad because this could have been a beautiful story about a relationship's trials. 

Korra is the one who made the relationship toxic. Trying to keep the peace by downplaying your own opinions and beliefs to avoid making your partner angry isn’t healthy. Walking on eggshells in a relationship is never a good sign, and it’s uncomfortable to watch.

I tend to think people who place all the blame on Mako just don’t like him. Mako was nearly perfect. And I’m not just saying that as a Mako stan. From the beginning, he has done nothing but try his best to support Korra. This is pretty much the pattern during the southern pole arc: Korra vents, Mako responds with what he thinks is supportive feedback. Korra accuses him of taking sides and then shuts the conversation down.  Mako is not the problem. At least while he’s in the southern pole. Korra’s responses are extreme, for starters, mostly because we as viewers are not given enough context to sympathize with her and see why she’s upset with Mako. Mako also listens to Korra’s responses in an effort to remedy the situation the next time there’s a disconnect. When Korra shuts down the first time after he offers his outside perspective, Mako changes his approach. The next time Korra vents, Mako responds by telling her he’ll support whatever decision she thinks is right instead of his opinion. Sure, there is a slight difference in the way Korra talks to Mako. The first time, Mako speaks without her asking for his advice on the matter, while the second time, she asks. Only Korra wanted him to voice his thoughts without her giving him the ok based on the dialogue: Korra: “Well?” Mako: “Well what?” Korra: “What do you think I should do?” 

No wonder Mako is confused and eventually becomes frustrated. It’s also important to note that Mako doesn’t do anything wrong here unless we’re supposed to blame him for not being a mind reader. In fact, Mako takes it a step further and asks Korra how they should communicate to avoid fighting.

Mako: “Do you want advice, or am I supposed to just listen? Still not clear on that.” 

Korra apologizes, but she never answers him, which becomes a problem when they return to Republic City. 

Antis love saying how Mako and Korra were so young when they dated and needed to mature first. I love Korra, but sorry she needed to stop suffering from the hands of Bryke, who just wanted the relationship to end mature. Mako’s approach was very satisfying to watch, and he handled the relationship in a way that would have led to something more healthy if extreme events didn’t occur.

Korra was also mean, and Mako is not a punching bag. He wasn’t going to just let Korra insult him. Mako only becomes combative when Korra makes jabs at him. Mako was the one who either diffused the situation if Korra couldn’t walk away. Otherwise, he’d stick up for himself whenever Korra became sarcastic. 

One of my favorite lines is Mako saying “I thought you wanted me to be supportive. Now you want to know what I think?!” I’ll admit he might have taken it too far when he told her to make up her mind (you were right Mako, but time and place 😬). That was how he got an air bison plushie shoved into his face. Korra was wrong for that, but I understand why she did it 😅. 

Once they got back to Republic City, things became terrible even though Mako and Korra had made up, and I guess Bryke wanted them to go back to square1. Mako finally hit his breaking point and started yelling back. In his comebacks, he threw Korra starting a civil war and messing up the world in her face, something she already felt guilty for. However, these insults were always said in response to Korra demeaning him. You can argue he shouldn’t have fought fire with fire, but again, Mako was at his limit, and Korra was beyond hers. 

The most ironic line in their fights is Korra telling Mako, “I can’t talk to you when you’re like this,” before storming out. I love it because this line really belongs to Mako! He’s the one who can’t talk to Korra and says so!

Even the breakup scene shows Mako starting out as the diplomatic one. His inner Tenzin came out. Korra, on the other hand, basically tried to intimidate him during the confrontation. She first leans over his desk and yells at him for answers. Mako remains seated, explains himself, and Korra doesn’t accept it. Instead, she then kicks his desk out of the way, so there’s nothing in between them. Idk stans, rewatching that scene makes me wonder Korra was actually looking to fight.   

Mind you, Korra has every right to be angry. Her feelings are real. This fight was probably the only fight I was ok with because we got to the source of the problem. She felt betrayed by Mako. This was the only time her accusation about Mako choosing sides makes sense. Of course, Mako was put in an impossible situation, dealing with an angry Avatar or being tried for treason. He made the right decision. Korra would forgive him at some point, and no one goes to jail. 

Also, I noticed that those who say Mako’s the toxic one conveniently forget he ended the relationship. I also don’t think that he would’ve if Korra didn’t say anything about him getting her way and alluding to choosing sides again. Look at his face:

I’m probably getting into headcanon territory, but I think something broke here. Maybe his heart. For 5 episodes, Mako has been trying to convince Korra that he’s on her side. He wants to help her and support her, but she never believes him. He couldn’t take it anymore it more and honestly, Mako did the best thing for his own mental health. And Korra, after all that talk and gusto, jogs out, and runs away. It’s almost comedic. Siighhh, shipping Makorra, and watching Book 2 is torture! 

Still, we have some really sweet moments of our favorite couple, like Mako asking Korra out to dinner 🥰. It’s moments like this that make rewatching Book 2 a little more bearable. Part of me cackles at the idea that Korra and Mako were so in love, it took a war to break them up. Safe to say wars can end any relationship.   

#kirbyspits answers #makorra #pro mako #mako #book 2 spirits

[7wanderingpaws]

Simply, yours (13)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: family AU, hapkido teacher AU, PhD AU

Word count: 4.3K

Warnings: language, description of injury, birth-giving (stuff around it)

A/N:  First of all, I apologise it took me over a month to update this story that is so close to my ❤. Hope this update was worth the wait. We have two chapters left! Second of all, this is a tiny roller-coaster haha. Enjoy! Also huge apologies if I left someone out from the tags!! 

tags:  @milky-baek @itsbaekhyunsbutt @luvhtears @shesdreaminginoverdose @cynthbee @jummyjammy @junmyeonnoona @littleflowercrown13 @sebootyforlife​ (if you want to be tagged/untagged please let me know!)

MASTERLIST

1 . 2 . 3 . 4 . 5 . 6 . 7 . 8 . 9 . 10 . 11 . 12 . 13

-

Winter left Korea completely, and warm spring slowly welcomed itself, together with it your due date as well. 

Cherry blossoms were about to be in full bloom and you asked Sukyeong to join you on a weekend stroll while Baekhyun was away on a hapkido competition with the university team. You hated staying alone and he probably hated it even more, given your blood-pressure that still didn’t stabilize itself as it should have, though it never became as severe as before. He even made Sukyeong promise to stay the night at yours so that you could have a “girls night”. When you asked why so suddenly given you barely ever did those before, he just shrugged and said: “Once you give birth you won’t be able to enjoy her company.” And he was right. Both of your lives were about to undergo huge changes, so you supported Baekhyun in doing whatever he wanted and needed to do and the same went for you. The idea that your carefree, independent lifestyle was about to be changed scared you.

“Are you sure you’re fine with walking so much?” asked Sukyeong carefully as you slowly made your way around Socho lake, the highest building of Seoul, Lotte tower, hanging above you, throwing a humongous shade over one side of the lake.

You ran your hand over the huge bump as you smiled. “Yes, don’t worry so much. It’s not like I will give birth right now.”

“You know I’m pretty sure everyone here thinks exactly that.” She looked around, noticing few people giving you a look-over. “Do you always get this many stares?”

You shrugged and took a deep breath of air. The pollution was not bad that day and the sun rays warmed up your skin in a pleasant manner. “Yeah, I do. But what can I do.”

“When is the due date again?”

“Mid-May,” you replied, the mention of the big day dampening your mood for a moment, “but that is if the pregnancy goes as planned. Apparently it’s more than likely I will go into labor earlier.”

Sukyeong tried not to pale at that, instead cleared her throat and pointed to a nearby bench. “Let’s sit. Your feet are terribly swollen,” she said, trying to sound lighthearted.

Not wanting to sound stubborn, you followed her even though you wanted to enjoy walking a bit more. It would be a mistake and you knew it, so you sighed big time once finally sitting down, the pressure in your legs easing up a bit.

“Why does Baekhyun still leave when he knows you can go to labor anytime soon?”

“I didn’t say any time soon,” you retorted, giggling at her overprotectiveness. “And I managed to persuade him to do the competitions while he can. If anything the birth might come early May. Which is Baekhyun’s birthday,” you said smiling. “If that wouldn’t be the coolest gift I could give him, whew. Three kids,” you chuckled and Sukyeong followed.

“Well, just make sure you’re healthy. You come first no matter what.”

Her words reminded you of your boss and his daughter-in-law; how she passed away while giving birth. Trying not to let it influence your mood too much, you looked up at the cherry trees through which sunlight was making its way. 

“It’s not like I can affect the outcome,” you finally replied, “but I will try my best.”

“You better,” she almost whimpered and you looked at her, just to see her eyes bulged in fear.

“Worst case scenario they will have to open me. Even worse? They might first let my vagina tear up before deciding the rest of the kids need to come out through c-section.”

You giggled when Sukyeong gasped in pure terror at what you just said. It was obvious she didn’t know all the things that could go wrong while giving birth and you weren’t about to spill all the secrets despite you wanting to vent about it because you were scared. So scared. Terrified.

“Can you still have sex after it... happens?” she asked warily.

You smiled, nodding. “Yeah, I can. But let’s not talk about it, it’s giving me stress.”

She was fast to massage your shoulders. “Yeah, let’s not stress you out. Baekhyun will kill me if he finds out I have as much as made you frown.”

-

Finally, the days that you would have to wait in the waiting room of your doctor in the clinic were lessening. Bearing three babies, it meant appointment visits every second week. Surely, you would get tired of the place and dread coming every time. Especially when every second week you would be bigger and heavier than the previous one, making it more tiring to come and spend a couple of hours outside of the house.

You looked up with worried eyes at your boyfriend who was reading a leaflet about breastfeeding, which immediately put a gentle smile on your face. The idea of Baekhyun not being scared or deterred of these topics was incredible for you. He was a special man, indeed.

When sensing your stare, he looked up with big puppy eyes, his lower lip caged between his teeth. “Huh? You said something?”

You giggled quietly as to not to disturb other ladies in the waiting room and shuffled a bit closer on the seat to press against his side. “You seem to be way too immersed in that woman's breast, honey.” You flickered your gaze downwards on the leaflet; the smiling lady holding a baby to her breast with an alarmingly slim body, yet obviously very pregnant stomach, sitting uncomfortably with you. They photoshopped everything these days.

Baekhyun gave you a confused look, blinking twice before snapping out of his weird reverie. “Oh, this- no, no,” he shook his head, smiling abashedly which you found absolutely adorable. “I was just thinking that we should talk about your plan about breastfeeding with the doctor. Do you think you can breastfeed three kids?” he asked thoughtfully, waving the leaflet in front of your face while his other hand rested on your thigh, squeezing it so that you would pay attention.

You sighed quietly, already tired at the idea of having to go through that process. It made you feel guilty, but if you were honest with yourself, you were scared and tired and achy and the last thing you wanted to think through was how your breasts would become the main food source for three tiny lives. You quickly rested your head on Baekhyun's shoulder so that he wouldn't see your fading smile. “I haven't thought about that, honey. But you're right. Let's discuss that. Maybe she can give me some life hacks.”

He chuckled softly and you instantly felt better, the sound lifting your spirits. He knocked your knee with his playfully before he settled lower on the chair so that you would be more comfortable.

As your eyes wandered around the room, you noticed several stares of the ladies who were waiting in the room, their gazes lingering on the two of you, some more on Baekhyun and some more on your huge stomach. You swore one of the young ones sighed while eyeing Baekhyun up, and you held back a scoff, feeling sudden pride that he was yours and the kids you were bearing were his.

“Your husband is so caring,” smiled the nurse that was at the reception desk, looking at you. “You both sure will be good parents.”

You pressed your lips together in a shy smile, not telling her that Baekhyun wasn't your husband. Baekhyun didn't say anything, either. The nurse continued anyway, saving you from replying: “You may enter now, the doctor is ready for you.”

“Thank you,” smiled Baekhyun handsomely at her as he swiftly stood up, holding your hand in his gingerly, both of you making your way into the well-known office.

Once settled inside, you faced the ever-so positive doctor of yours. It seemed she was more excited about your pregnancy than you were.

“So, the typical question,” she smiled widely, connecting her long, elegant fingers in front of her face, “any difficulties? Problems? Dizziness caused  by blood pressure?”

“No, thankfully none of that.”

“Great,” she winked at you, “the date is fast approaching,” she chirped as she went through your records, “but as I said last time, it is very likely you will go into early labour. There is no need to panic, though, dear,” she told you kindly. “I suppose you know all of this information by now, but just to tell you once again: the best is to go to the hospital once the water broke. Unfortunately, the likeliness of them sending you home only due to slight contractions in state-owned hospitals is very high,” she shrugged, obviously annoyed at the fact. “Therefore, the best is to stay calm, wait until it becomes too much and the water breaks. Until it did, it is only the small prelude to what is about to come.”

Baekhyun was listening carefully despite knowing most of the information already, while you dreaded the entire talk about the moment everything would start happening. You kept imagining the whole process in your head, one imagination worse than the other. It was difficult to point out what exactly was it that scared you so much, but the entire idea of having to go through terrible pain, your body failing, or babies' lives failing was enough to send you into a severe panic attack.

 “I can see you are worried,” said the doctor to you. “But it will be alright. Keep it up just like until now. You know, for the fact that you are expecting three, you both seem way too calm and zen about it,” she tried to joke, laughing.

Baekhyun giggled while you gave her a weak smile. “I guess we are trying to preserve the calm atmosphere before the arrival of the three babies,” replied Baekhyun lightheartedly.

You nodded. “But doc, you will be there, right?” you asked in a small tone. “I mean, in the hospital, when it happens.”

She smiled, her features softening. “I am not letting the chance to bring three babies to this world slip away, sweetie. I'll be there, and we will get through it together.”

Gracing her with a gracious smile, you nodded in acknowledgement before Baekhyun brought up the topic about breast-feeding.

“Oh, yes, very good question,” she gave him a huge smile. “You have a couple of options here. Obviously, you may breastfeed and you can also pump. Pumping is the best when having multiples, of course, but it is up to the mother what would work the best for her. Three babies can be quite the handful to breastfeed, but let's not forget that it is the best way to be close to your little ones. Mother's arms are the safest they will ever be.”

Baekhyun smiled down at you affectionately before turning to the doctor. “Yeah, we should still consider pumping-”

“Once the babies are born, we will figure out what works the best,” you chimed in gently, looking at your boyfriend who turned to look at you. You smiled at him. “We still don't know what will happen after the birth, but knowing that pumping is an option is certainly good.”

You knew well what went through Baekhyun's mind at that moment. He didn't like it when you conspired around what would happen after birth, because whenever you did, it almost always led you to two conclusions: either one of the babies would be dead or you would be dead. As much you both fought around it, you couldn't help yourself, and he tried to understand your train of thoughts, just to ease you up, but he would still voice out the hatred around the idea of him losing you.

That was why once you left the clinic, he stopped you on the street, his gaze heavy and serious. “Listen, I just want you to know that-” he took a deep breath, ignoring your eyes looking at him warily, “-whatever the hell happens during birth, you come first. I love our children already, and I couldn't be a more excited father-to-be, but-” he exhaled sharply and held your cheeks in his warm palms, his eyes glistening, “you come first to me. Always. I can't go on without you and if it ever, godforbid, comes to the decision to choose,” he shook his head, already trying to rid his mind of the terrible images, “I am choosing you over...over… the babies,” he whispered eventually, obviously pained.

You could barely make out the gentle features of your obviously scared boyfriend, because of the emotional tears that welled up in your eyes. You crashed into his chest, pushing yourself as far into him as you could, your hand having a death grip on his long-sleeved shirt. His words moved something inside of you, something much deeper than just a simple word of love and adoration. He really could get under your skin and make you feel special even through uttered words. Baekhyun was something so rare and so precious, it made you weep in gratitude. Because he was yours.

-

“You won't be going to training this evening?” you asked, emerging from the bedroom after your small afternoon nap you grew to be needing so much.

Baekhyun was crafting up some food in the kitchen and it actually made your stomach grumble in hunger. He looked behind his shoulder. “You're up, babe? Yeah, no training tonight for me. Jiyoung can lead the training by herself. I trust her on that.”

You nodded, coming to stand close to him, reaching up with your hand, drawing circles over his back between his prominent shoulder blades. “I'm glad you will be staying.”

“How are you feeling?”

You shrugged, still a little sleepy. “Alright, no pains so far.”

He smiled at you, nudging his chin towards the empty counter next to him. “Give me company?”

You nodded eagerly and he was fast to bring a chair to help you sit up on the counter before moving the chair out of the way. You leaned back on the cabinets while resting your hands on your belly. “What is daddy making, hm?”

“Something very delicious and packed with all the vitamins mummy needs,” he replied nonchalantly as he was chopping up vegetables.

Humming in satisfaction, you watched Baekhyun do his magic around the kitchen.

“Nothing gives you a tummy ache?” he double-checked again when he took out spam from the fridge.

At the sight of spam, you grew even more excited. “Nope! I already can't wait to try the food,” you wiggled your legs in the air and he laughed.

You chatted away the time he was moving around the kitchen, cooking and preparing plates. He was talking about the competitions and how well they had been doing in the ranks which made you proud, because of course Baekhyun would do well. He always did.

Baekhyun cleaned up the kitchen before serving the food on the plates and he walked to stand in front of you with a gorgeous smile. You returned it, opening your legs so he could stand a little closer, which he did. Leaning in and kissing you gently, he hugged you to him, hiding his face in your neck while one of his hands reached for the hem of your shirt, bunching it up to reveal your stomach. He wordlessly caressed it with gentleness before pulling away to give you another kiss on your lips.

“Love you,” he whispered into your lips, pecking you again.

You giggled and he moved his head to your tummy.

“And I also love each and every one of you, my loves,” he mumbled to the bump and pressed three kisses. Just then, you gasped, feeling the discomfort of the well-known action by now. Couple of tiny feet could be seen on your skin covering your stomach, and both you and Baekhyun laughed affectionately when you saw Baekhyun incredibly happy that the babies were so responsive to his honey-like voice. It had been happening for a few weeks now where he would kiss them goodnight or goodmorning and he would receive a kick in greetings.

Your heart swelled with love and warmth, and for a moment you became eager to see him with the babies and how he would play with them and treat them. He would look so lovely, you thought while watching your boyfriend giggle and caress you a bit more before bringing you into a happy kiss.

“I love you, too,” you mumbled in between and he gave you a curious gaze. You smiled. “I didn't say it back just now.” And then you pressed his cheeks together with your hands. “Aaah, what to do with you, you're so cute! Your cheeks!” you screeched in a coo-voice that made him frown at you which only made him look funnier to you. “Wah, but really, Baekhyunnie, what the hell? It isn't fair for you to be so dangerously hot and then suddenly cute like a puppy!”

“Yah, yah, enough,” he muffled through his squeezed lips, “the food will get cold.”

“But you are soooo cuuuteeee!”

“Enou-”

“Who are you this cute for?” you rambled on, giggling happily and finally let go of the poor man.

Baekhyun leaned away, still in shock at your antiques, though you could see amusement glistening in his eyes. “I suggest not to do this to our babies. It's a traumatic experience.”

You burst out laughing and he followed too,when he suddenly became serious and leaned in closer, his breath fanning your ear which sent shivers down your spine, halting your laughing fit. “You're so lucky I can't do anything to you right now, sweetheart. But just know that I am keeping a punishment list for you once you give birth, mummy.” You felt his hands squeezing the outer side of your thighs, his fingers sliding down and under your knees.

You swallowed harshly and looked at him when he turned to look at you. “That was hot.”

He smirked. “So I'm not so cute anymore, huh?”

-

It has been a day now that you started to feel slight pains just like on the days when you had a strong, painful menstruation. When the first wave hit, you started to get a feeling of what was about to happen. You just didn’t expect it to start happening so... soon. There were still a few weeks left. Were you even ready for what was about to go down very soon? You had to be even if you weren’t.

The next day you went to bed in peace, Baekhyun bringing your body closer to his even when he knew you would grow very warm over the night and shift away. He caressed your bump before he lifted the blanket and your shirt, and moved to kiss the skin tenderly.

“Goodnight, my loves,” he pressed three kisses and kept looking a little longer in hopes to see a kick back in reply. Few days ago one of the babies kept kicking like crazy and Baekhyun concluded it was the hapkido baby. You giggled, already imagining Baekhyun teaching your kids hapkido, them in their little uniforms and having little, clumsy moves.

“No activity today,” he rasped with an amused smile as he lied down next to you properly but you stopped him with a guilty smile. “Huh, what is it?”

“I really need to pee. Can you come with me to the toilet? Pleaseee,” you wailed, trying not to wiggle too much because you were growing uncomfortable with the slow start of contractions and the pee pressing down on your uterus.

Baekhyun smiled and nodded. “Let’s go.” He took your hand and helped you up. 

Quickly tiptoeing to the bathroom, once finally inside, he leaned against the sink while you sat down on the toilet, looking up at him with big eyes.

He chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest, the shirt tightening around his pecks.

You felt a stronger wave of pain in your lower tummy and you groaned gently as your pee seemed to become endless. Baekhyun noticed too.

“Wow, when was the last time you went to the toilet? That’s a lot of pee there, mummy,” he joked, mistaking your groaning for relief but you didn’t feel the relief peeing was supposed to give you anymore.

You raised your butt lightly and looked between your legs (or wherever you could look due to the big tummy) at the water-like liquid streaming strongly down your thighs.

“You okay?” asked Baekhyun, frowning when he saw you looking longer than it was normal.

Another small, but stronger wave of pain washed over your insides and you felt like crying as you looked up at your concerned boyfriend. It was about to start.

“Baekhyun. My water broke.”

-

“I'm so scared, Baekhyun,” you whimpered when you were in the hospital room, both of you left alone until the contractions would get intense enough to go into labour. “I'm so scared.”

Finally, you could let your guard down. You were heaving, your body already reacting to the pains, growing more and more frequent and painful. Sitting on a huge, pink pilates ball, you tried to sway your body on it while your arm was connected to an IV drip, but there were tears streaming down your face..

“Shh, shh, it's alright, you're alright, baby,” he cooed gently as he sat behind you on a chair to hold you up. “You're doing great.”

You pressed your lips together to prevent an ugly sob. “But what if-”

“No what ifs,” he replied calmly from behind, sweeping your hair back and tying it into a messy ponytail so it wouldn't be in the way. “Everything is going as planned, honey.”

You were quiet for a minute, fighting the bulge in your throat. Your legs were wobbly and it seemed like you were heading straight into a panic attack, which was anything but good.

Baekhyun, sensing your stiff composure, stood up and right in front of you, helping you up on your legs. “Sweetheart,” he mumbled lovingly, searching your gaze. You focused your eyes on him. “I've got you. I'm here and we will get through this together.” He held you close, eventually deciding to hug you. “If you need to cry, do it. Don't hold back.” Lazily, he drew circles over your lower back that he knew was the most painful part of your back. It brought instant relaxation, though you still hissed at another wave of contractions that made your knees weak.

Baekhyun supported you, holding you up as you groaned, hiding your face in his neck. “It hurts,” you whimpered weakly and let out another groan when a strong pull rushed through your lower abdomen. Your breathing grew frantic, sweat breaking around your hairline.

“I think-” you paused, squeezing your eyes shut as the contraction wouldn't go away.

“Let's call the nurse,” suggested Baekhyun before quickly helping you sit down.

You would have called after him to stop him from going away from you, but you lied back down, pushing your legs together, the pain growing almost unbearable.

Nurse arrived quickly followed by your boyfriend who tried his best not to look too shocked. After a quick check-up, the nurse smiled. “We are ready!”

-

Three babies being born (two girls, one boy) too early, you were separated from them right after squeezing them out. Not having time to even properly hold them, you only got to see the nurses placing them in the blanket before rushing them out of the room while their cries were piercing through your ears. You were swimming between complete exhaustion and overdrive as you cried from pain that came from your body as a woman who just gave birth and at the same time as a mother who couldn't even hold her babies in her arms after finally helping them out and into the world.

Baekhyun was completely helpless, standing next to you and trying to get a glimpse of the little ones, but he wouldn't let go of your hand. You were desperately holding onto him for dear life. 

Feeling his own tears roll down his cheeks at what just happened, Baekhyun quickly brought your head to him, hugging it to his chest while you cried, your voice already hoarse from screaming before. 

Nurses were roaming around you and it was just a matter of seconds as you heard them telling you they had to stitch you up and your doctor, the ever-so-kind doctor, appeared in front of you. “Give her anesthesia.” She looked at you and Baekhyun, who wouldn't let go of you. “The babies will be alright, but they need to be in the incubator for the time being because of the early birth, sweetie. Please calm down. Right now we have to stitch you up.”

“S-stitch me up?” you stuttered.

She had an apologetic smile and she shot a glance at Baekhyun, who straightened up. “You are severely torn up. So let's quickly tend to the open wound.”

You grew almost sick at the idea and you were sure Baekhyun was completely frozen, though he snapped out of it pretty quickly as you whimpered again in fear. Exhaustion was taking over you quickly.

“You're doing phenomenally, my superwoman,” Baekhyun whispered into your ear as he caressed your hair, pressing multiple kisses there. He was completely shaken up by what he had just witnessed in the past hours, but he had to stay strong for you just a little longer.

You sighed once more before you saw the doctor ducking between your legs again and starting another small intervention.

You closed your eyes and focused on Baekhyun's powerful presence.

You were left without your three babies.

You were left torn open.

But you were alive.

You all were alive.

#baekhyun fanfiction #exo fanfiction #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun romance #baekhyun domestic au #baekhyun pregnancy au #exo fluff #exo romance #baekhyun smut #exo smut #mywritings

[twilightfansofcolor]

Black!Bella (New Moon edition)

wc: 1.7k

So the summer is here and Bella is on cloud 9

Without a doubt one of the best summers ever

When her leg healed up, Charlie took her hiking just like when she was little, or they’d go to La Push to look at the tidepools or they’d just go to Seattle to visit the aquarium

Sleepovers with Jessica and Angela where they’d stay up watching Studio Ghibli movies, binge watching the Vogue and Harper’s Bazaar YouTube channels, giving each other makeovers and giving each other recommendations about skin care products

Long conversations with Renee about college

Renee thinks Bella should try a school in New York

Charlie wants her to go an HBCU

She never told Charlie that she filled out applications for NYU and a school in Louisiana that she liked, and that she was expecting to hear back from them soon

Bella and Edward would spend hours at their favorite bookstore chain in Port Angeles looking through the summer releases

They went there so much they were offered membership cards where they’d get 15% off every purchase

Sleepovers with Alice where Bella would constantly ask her what she saw in that C*nfederate 

Bella’s first few weeks of school fall around the same time as her birthday

She doesn’t have that many classes with Edward or Alice which she finds odd since Forks High is a small school

 Bella’s birthday is pretty much canon

Renee gave her a gift box of her favorite Godiva chocolate, makeup and skincare products while Charlie got her a Nintendo Switch with a few games so they could play against each other on Mario Kart.

The birthday party is still the same and ends in disaster 

Edward starts distancing himself from her, and so does Alice

Alice doesn’t wait for her outside her art class so they could walk to physics 

Something is wrong, Bella can feel it in her bones even though Angela and Jessica tell her that it’s probably nothing

Bella is bracing for whatever is coming. Could it be Victoria seeking revenge and Edward doesn’t know how to tell her?

Something worse, much worse

Bella listens to him tell her that they have to leave Forks and it takes her a minute to realize that the Cullens have to leave town without her

“In the hospital, you said you’d stay!”

“As long as it was safe for you, and after what happened at the party, it’s clearly not safe for me to be around you, Bella.”

Edward kisses her on the forehead one last time before he leaves, probably forever 

Charlie isn’t home from work so she just works on dinner in a daze with the television volume up as loud as she can stand it, NCIS blaring from the living room

Charlie confronts her when he finds out that the Cullens left town and that’s when she just cries, acknowledging it for the first time in hours

The following weeks after his departure are touch and go. 

She goes weeks without getting her hair braided, and just keeps it in a bun/poof 

Bella doesn’t wear makeup no matter how many times Charlie tries to entice her with the Vogue YouTube channel

“C’mon Bella, you love Saweetie,” Charlie said as if she were a toddler again, trying to get her to eat Cauliflower 

It isn’t until Charlie calls her mom that she snaps out of it and Renee tells her what she needs to know

“Bella, I know you’re going through a hard time, but you have other things you need to be worrying about. It hurts, I know, but moping around ain’t gonna bring him back, and you’re not the first person to be dumped. You’re getting ready to graduate high school in less than a year, and you need to start thinking about your future.”

Renee had never spoken to her like that before but she realized her mom was right, she did need to start thinking about her plans for the future

After giving herself two more days to cry it out, Bella gets right back to business

She’s blasting Flo Milli while she gets ready for school, gets a new wardrobe and is now tutoring kids in school and La Push for some extra cash

Which is how she runs into Jacob again

She helps him with biology which turns into Charlie coming home and finding the two of them watching Guy's Grocery Games and arguing about which contestant they think is getting the boot next

Not that he’s complaining. He’s secretly hoping they’d get together

One Friday night in February, Bella invites him to the movies with a few friends from school

And it starts to go downhill when Jacob threatens Mike, who got sick halfway through the movie

Jacob reveals his feelings for Bella but she has to reject his advances

She loves Jacob, he’s been so sweet to her, but she cannot handle another relationship when she’s barely over the first one

When Bella calls him on Saturday morning to apologize, he doesn’t pick up the phone or answer any of her texts but she thinks nothing of it, chalking it up to him being sick

The next time she calls, she calls the house and Billy tells her Jacob is feeling better but that he’s not up for visitors, so she takes matters into her own hands

She spends the entire morning parked outside his house waiting for him

Bella doesn’t recognize him, he’s a lot bigger, his hair is shorter and his usually warm brown eyes look cold

Jacob tells her to go home and not to come back and Bella knows that Sam finally got him like he did Embry and he proceeds to tell her how he’s not good enough for her like the Cullens and alludes to the fact that he knows the Cullens’ secret

“You’ve been lying to everyone. Charlie… but you can’t lie to me, Bella. Go home. Or you’re gonna get hurt.”

She just stands there in the cold rain, getting soaked from head to toe, and she can’t tell if she’s crying or if it’s just the rain hitting her face

She has a strange dream involving a brown wolf the size of a horse, Jacob, and surprisingly, Edward

Bella confronts Jacob again, this time almost getting into it with Paul who turns into a wolf right in front her

Embry and Jared take her back to Sam’s house where she meets Emily

Bella and Emily get along well, and she finds out Emily is from the Makah tribe in Neah Bay, but she’s an elementary school math teacher’s assistant at the tribal school

She’s relieved when Jacob comes back to the house, safe and free of scratches and they walk along the beach and catch up

Bella is just happy that her friend is back and she vents about what’s really been bothering her: the encounter with Laurent, saying that Victoria is still looking for him

“You don’t have to worry about them. We took down the one with the locs easy enough.”

It doesn’t register for a minute so she just stands there, trying to make sense of it. “Y-you… killed Laurent?”

At this point, Bella is crying with tears of joy, her mascara smearing with tears and Jacob just holding her

Their friendship is back to normal in no time and pick up right where they left off

Bella has to remind Charlie, Angela and Jessica several times that she’s not dating Jacob 

Not that she hasn’t thought about it

It would be so easy, and both of their dads would be happy, and she wouldn’t have to lie like she does with Charlie and any of her friends

One day they’re just driving around, goofing off when she sees a group of kids jumping from the cliff

She’s getting her phone out to dial 911 before Jake stops her and tells her that they’re just cliff diving

Jacob offers to take her sometime, maybe when it’s warmer out, promising they’ll start at the lower level

It’s dark when they pull up to her house and Bella starts to invite him in for dinner when she notices a familiar car parked down the street

Bella remembers everything about that car, the quiet engine as she sat in the back seat while his C*nfederate brother drove them to Phoenix, the feel of the leather seats as she slept.

They go in anyway, and Bella is surprised to see Alice sitting on the couch reading a magazine, but she needs Bella’s help because Edward is in trouble

The audacity. The sheer fucking audacity

“I haven’t heard from you in almost a year. You avoided me in the halls, you blocked my number and my email, but now when you reappear from thin air I’m supposed to help you? What do I get out of this?”

Alice insists that Edward needs Bella’s help, that she can’t do this without her

At this point Bella knows that Charlie put a tracking device on her phone, and she’s not going to risk it

Jacob begging her not to go, and she really doesn’t want to go either

Instead she writes a quick letter telling Edward not to do what he’s thinking of doing just because they’re not together, saying that she’s happy with how her life is and she gives it to Alice to pass along

Despite EVERYTHING that happened, she wants him to be safe, so Bella gives Alice the letter

“What does this mean? Would they come back?” Jacob asked after Alice had left.

Bella knows what would happen if all of the Cullens came back: more young Quileute kids turning into wolves, and she doesn’t want that to happen, but she can’t stop it from happening either

“I really have no clue, but that’s their decision, and I have no hand in that game.”

It takes three days before the Cullens return to Forks, and she’s facing Edward again one day in the woods behind her house

Bella just tells him everything she’s been feeling since he left and more

“There isn’t any hope for us, there probably never was, and we can’t pretend any of this never happened, Edward. You know that. We can’t go back to normal, because it wasn’t normal in the first place. You were right the first time, and I should’ve listened.”

It goes without saying that Bella is going to keep the secret, but she’s also going to move on with her life, and wants Edward to do the same

Alexa, play “Clean” by Taylor Swift

#bella swan #twilight fans of color #god i hope this doesn't suck