#this concept was funnier when i wasn’t awake

[usenewbornsasbowlingpins]

#the dammed become the fate of that which caused them suffering #horse plinko #horse #once punished but now the punishment #eternal damnation #bible study #this concept was funnier when i wasn’t awake #i don’t know why i made this

[btsandvmin]

What made you like Jimin individually and Taehyung individually ? And do you have a slight preference between the two ?

I love all the members so much, and for me picking a bias is still kind of difficult. I have concluded that I do bias both Jimin and Tae but kind of switch between them at different times for different reasons. As for a bias wrecker I legit cannot choose and it changes all the time.

The way I got into BTS was through the BST MV and then trying to learn the members (the first one I learned and checked up on was Namjoon). I also got fascinated by the BU storyline as storytelling and analysis/reviews is a big hobby of mine (the fandoms I’ve been in are many, and character/story analyses/reviews/theories are something I have engaged in a lot). 

On top of that I work in the media industry and have an interest for visual storytelling as well and I got hooked by the concepts, the beautiful MV and the both story-based and symbolical clues they left. I also loved their music and like groups in general because of the interesting vocal dynamics you can create.  Basically, BTS managed to hit all my buttons and I had to look up more.

Mind you, I barely knew the members' names properly and I was already investigating the meaning of their MV and storyline. I listened to their album and loved the songs before I could tell which member was who. (Both Awake and First love made me cry without even knowing the lyrics).  I also have to mention how much I love both of Vmin’s voices, who are both very unique and interesting. I basically biased their voices before I knew who they were. (Fun or sad fact but I am really bad with faces and actually learned the members' singing voices before their faces.)

Let’s just say that I got into the music and visuals/concept first, and then started to consume material to get to know the members. They all also had incredible chemistry between each other and reminded me a lot of one of my favorite j-pop groups with their dynamics. 

What I started to watch was “get to know them” videos and recent interviews and clips, meaning from BST era. It was hard for me to not notice Jimin (even though vocal line were the ones I had the hardest time separating from each other in the very beginning). And perhaps even more so since the introduction videos tended to have a lot better and varied things to say about Jimin amongst vocal line. But even on his own Jimin simply stood out to me during the BST era when I joined. He took a lot of space in the group as a performer (especially with his high notes, his dancing, his hair and his outfits all combined) but also as an individual in off stage material. I fell for his voice and performance and the “Jimin effect” was hitting me hard. 

I also related to him a lot. I am a sort of clingy but shy person who is a perfectionist and likes being in control. I also thought he was both cute and funny without being too over the top with things like aegyo (I mean, we all know he is horrible at it when he tries to do it on purpose). I think the way Jimin is so open (though private) makes him easy to understand and relate to. He has a lot of different moods and there is an honesty in how much he shows us even though he clearly still remained in control.

As time went by, I found myself focusing on Jimin more than the other members and I realized my bias. I was simply drawn to him more than the others from the start. That in turn brings me to Taehyung... Because honestly, at the time it was impossible not to notice their closeness. And looking up a lot of old material, where Jimin was there was also Taehyung. They were very clingy and had a lot of cute interactions. One of the first things I watched of their more off-stage material was also Bon Voyage in Scandinavia (being from there myself I was extra curious) and the Vmin moments in there just cemented their bond for me.

I am not saying I only appreciate Tae for ship reasons, simply that Vmin got my attention early on and that did make me focus more on Taehyung as well. I thought as many that he was a bit odd, but very funny and playful, that he was incredibly good-looking (my opinion from the start was that JK and Tae were the most good-looking) but also a bit difficult to read. Taehyung made me want to understand him, and I was interested in him for quite different reasons than how I related to Jimin. I love him for his way of thinking and how he seems to have this innocence or happiness in the small things about him. Like, Tae getting lost in Sweden but still being happy about the small adventure, enjoying himself and stopping to blow on a dandelion might just be one of the most endearing things I have ever seen. (Honestly, another point I relate to Jimin on so much is his love for Tae and how he just makes us smile no matter what he does.)

Of course, as they change and as I get to watch them more, the more I find to love and appreciate (as well as flaws of course) and now I would say all the members are just very precious to me and I love them both for who they are on their own and for their bond as a group. It is impressive and not to be understated how rare it is to find a bond like theirs. I have seen many groups, and few are as compatible as BTS, and few seem to truly love each other the way they do.

But as for bias it will likely always be Jimin and Taehyung unless there is some drastic change.

For Jimin I love the way he dances while controlling every fiber of his body, the way he pours love into all his relationships but isn’t afraid to call people out, the way he keeps getting funnier (I think Jimin’s sense of humor is so underrated), the way he acts like an angel but actually has the whole world fooled (and he knows it), the way he shows his emotions so animatedly no matter if he gets annoyed or laughs with his whole body, the way he knows his principles and stands his ground when he believes in something, the way he works so hard to improve and better himself both as a performer and as a human, the way he thinks about things deeply and is so eloquent with how to express it, the way he is there for both ARMY, his members and even strangers because he is empathic to his core. There is a lot to love with Jimin, and he always makes sure to return that love when deserved.

For Taehyung I love the way he stand against the norms, the way he shows it’s ok to be different and embrace himself and others without judgement, the way he almost plays with us when he performs, the way he sings with such emotion and how he loves to express himself through all kinds of art forms, the way he learns and take in valid criticism but isn’t afraid to call bullshit, the way he knows when to be serious but also the importance of having fun, the way he is both the biggest dork and a fierce performer at once (I mean he can be so unapologetically silly and then suddenly switch to lethal seduction), the way his unique way of thinking opens up to new points of view, the way he can’t help but show his excitement or love for something and wants to share it with the people around him. He goes all out when he loves something and doesn’t hide his opinions when he doesn’t. Taehyung is just a very honest (though perfectly capable of lying and fooling us thank you very much) and incredible person that I both admire and adore.

There is just so much, and even small things get to me, like don’t get me started on their smiles, or even just their habits when they laugh... (how Tae usually laughs quietly but once in a while will let out these light giggles, or the way Jimin seem to automatically covers his face when he laughs).

I love them both to death (as all the members). It is not easy to just sit down and pour years of love into words, but I tried. I love them both as singers, performers, artists, and humans. I also love them as soulmates and how much they both just spread love and positivity to the people around them. The impact they have had on me, and surely many of you, is hard to comprehend. I am so lucky and happy that I decided to become a fan of this wonderful group and these wonderful people.

Phew, that was a lot wasn’t it? All opinion based, probably a bit hard to understand and not very well structured either. This is all just a flow of consciousness, and I likely forgot to mention a lot of things I could have said. Even so I hope you found it a nice read. :) Thank you for the ask.

#taehyung #jimin #vmin #kim taehyung #park jimin #my story #vmin appriciation #my post #btsandvmin ask #btsandvmin answer #btsandvmin #vmin blood sweat and tears #bts

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 12

post directory

obsetress: don’t ask why i had this thought because i couldn’t tell you but

obsetress: jamie wakes up in the middle of the night one night and is like “i... had a dream. about vi”

obsetress: and dani’s like “ok baby” and just nuzzles deeper into her pillow and jamie’s like

obsetress: “no, dani, a... a dream”

obsetress: and dani’s like “oh. oh” and is immediately wide awake and bright eyed

obsetress: and is like “was it any good?” and jamie is just. already flushed so red and flushed deeper and dani just hums

em: sighs wistfully

em: i also love that something compels jamie to tell dani Immediately

em: oh the perils of begrudgingly being friends w ur gfs ex

em: jamies like um. no see i can see all these different things my brain mashed together and WHY i had this dream and danis like ok but that wasn’t my question....

obsetress: jamie finally throws up her hands “of course it was”

em: jamie: And You Can’t Tell Vi She’ll Be Insufferable

obsetress: dani, very plainly, at brunch the next morning: so vi

obsetress: jamie looks like she’s going to have a heart attack and dani lets her sweat and then just smiles sweetly “i like those sunglasses. are they new?”

em: jamie what’s the problem (nothin. indigestion)

obsetress: dani very smug n thinks she’s very funny

obsetress: (she is a little funny)

em: one of jamies many ‘oh that’s why they dated’ moments

obsetress: “fookin sick, the both of ya”

em: idk why you had this thought but i’m GREATLY amused

obsetress: skskksksks right

obsetress: jamie explaining her dream to dani in great detail afterwards

obsetress: dani sitting there nodding and hmming “oh that sounds like her. no, she wouldn’t do that. now THAT she would be very good at, you’d like it”

em: i need a moment

em: jamie thinks the dark hides her massive fucken blush but it Doesn’t

em: dani can feel her heating up

obsetress: jamie “i don’t ask you to do this” dani “you’re not stopping me”

em: dani critiquing jamies sex dream is such a fucken funny concept sjdhdkhdkdhdkc

obsetress: RIGHT

obsetress: i’m dying

em: dani: oh no that’s OOC

obsetress: she wouldn’t have a riding crop jamie, it’s 2021, not 16—

em: jamie: it’s a wet dream do u really think it’s gonna have beta readers and a three act structure

em: dani hums

obsetress: dani: well did you enjoy it

obsetress: jamie: i— dani: did you?

obsetress: jamie mumbling yeah

em: jamies like i’m gonna interrogate dani next time, see how she feels- but she forgets dani is incapable of feeling shame

obsetress: like dani wouldn’t just launch into a ramble

---

em: viola

obsetress: fuck

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: to jamie, specifically,

em: to jamie specifically andhdjhdjd

em: once again ironic jamvi has turned, in my brain, into ‘yes and....’ jamvi

—-

obsetress:

obsetress: jamie sending this to viola n vi's like

obsetress: she doesn't get it because she's convinced her taste is immaculate

---

em: anyway this is ooc even for exes au but i keep thinking abt like. jamie tryna crack how old viola is (she cant be 34 im 30 it doesnt make sense) and going through her fb timeline like. 'aha! motivational quotes. gotta be late 30s' and danis either like

em: danis either like 'you have a notebook where you write down all the quotes you like baby' OR shes like haha ok thats fair (posts another motivational quote on her fb)

obsetress: god i love that so much

obsetress: both of those dani responses are

obsetress: honestly porque no los dos if we're already going ooc

obsetress: i do think the first bit "gotta crack it she can't be 34 i'm 30 it doesn't make sense" is in character fwiw

em: obviously i was inspired by ur post in the milf channel abt viola always saying shes 35

em: big brain

—-

obsetress: this is literally just. exes au rebecca

obsetress: down to the caption

obsetress: vi and rebecca patiently staging like full photoshoots for each other every time one of them wants a pic otp: i'm not high maintenance, you're just low effort

---

em: bold 2 say that we don’t think about jamie and vi tho

em: gotta keep some sorta. presentation of respectability

em: they absolutely couldn’t date tho

obsetress: lmao ikr

obsetress: yeah no they'd kill each other

obsetress: now just thinking of silly circumstances and um

obsetress: rebecca's out of town and dani's flying back from some iowa thing jamie couldn't get away for to go with

obsetress: and viola's like "oh, just stay at ours, it's closer and i'll get you a car"

obsetress: and just like

obsetress: imagining the two of them cohabitating at vi's for a night

em: jamie sneaking around at night tryna find the bathroom and runs straight into vi in a face mask and a dangerously low dressing gown Again

obsetress: the parallels to canon

obsetress: im giggling

obsetress: walks straight into her path

em: opens a door. sees something she doesn’t want to see. immediately turns and walks away

em: god the face mask would make her look like the lady in the lake

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: vi wants to go out to dinner, jamie's just like "i'm already getting up early to go to the airport, can't we just have an easy night in"

em: what did i say before. that thing abt if ur friends w damie you will inevitably walk in on them

obsetress: god yeah

em: flip of that.

obsetress: oh GOD

em: god they would argue about dinner

em: bicker about EVERYTHING

em: dani and rebecca both make the married couple joke

em: jamie goes pale

obsetress: wait sorry i just went back to tahirahs insta post and like

obsetress: katie parker commented and was like "i love these shots of you" and she was like "thanks luv " and i'm like

obsetress: why does this....... still track........... with exes au...............

em: perdy is always a little too flirty w vis paramours

obsetress: always! except dani for whatever reason

obsetress: she's just scared of dani

em: Please

obsetress: rebecca's like "i don't see what the problem is. she can do what she wants, but you trust me, don't you?" "of course i trust you" rebecca shrugs "that's it then, isn't it?"

obsetress: anyway vi huffs n crosses her arms n pouts a little bit and is like "well i don't want her to"

obsetress: rebecca is endeared and uses the opportunity to her advantage like the top leaning switch she is

em: dani rebecca parallels: always dtf

obsetress: perdi and vi fighting and vi's like "are you even gay? or do you just want what i have?" and perdi is like "does it matter?"

em: are you even gay perdi nahdkdhdkdhd

em: perdi is like you KNOW about jamie and viola crinkles her nose bc she forgot about that and she’s starting to respect jamie as a person

obsetress: djflakdkfjldkadjLDJFLSKDFJLSDKFJx

obsetress: i screeched

em: viola: you only MET jamie because i hired her for landscaping you fucking-

obsetress: just thinking about perdita watching jamie working on some property sweating in a tank top and Deciding

em: bringing out some lemonade etc

em: haha you look parched

obsetress: smiling widely, turning on the charm

obsetress: jamie is very attractive and very swoonworthy, but perdita 100% only goes for it because she refuses to let viola have one (1) thing

obsetress: and that extends to lesbianism

em: viola's like no this is normal right. siblings competing. rivalries etc and danis like uh i’m an only child and jamies like uh i raised my brother

em: they don’t know how to tell her sure it happens but it’s also extremely fucken weird vi

obsetress: jamie: you have to tell her dani: why do i have to tell her jamie: you tell her everything dani: i don't tell her–– ok, i tell her most things. i'm not sure i want to tell her this though jamie: why not dani: she's not... she's not gonna like it jamie: So You Might Be A People Pleaser,

em: jamie: i can’t tell her. she’s only just forgotten the perdi thing. what if she remembers i’ve

em: in depth character study of viola and perdi’s fucked up rivalry

em: violas like goddamn it do i have to fuck jamie to get even

obsetress: i––

em: she decides against it

em: jamie is none the wiser

obsetress: she Considers it tho

em: jamie would die on the spot if she knew

obsetress: weighs the pros and cons

obsetress: the best part is like

obsetress: this is all post-danvi and pre-damie right so when dani n jamie see rebecca and vi at that video store

obsetress: viola's like wait.

obsetress: wait

obsetress: dani ending up with the hot gardener her sister fucked because she has bizarre jealousy and possession issues is really just the cherry on top of a shit sundae

em: the funniest part of all our very tangled lore is like

em: none of it contradicts bc it’s even funnier when it’s Extremely Ugly And Messy

em: because lesbians are just... like that

---

obsetress: exes au au where viola did fuck jamie, the video rental shop scene is 100 times more awkward

em: don’t think about it don’t think about it dont

em: i am thinking about it

em: jamie has to deal with having been railed by all three of them instead of just the two

em: it feels very uneven to her bc rebeccas a doll, dani, u don’t understand, and ur only running into one ex,

obsetress: talk about the mortifying ordeal of being known

obsetress: "wait, that's your ex?" "yeah" "dani" "what" "dani" "what" jamie's voice is hushed but a lil pitchy and a lot panicky "i think i fucked your ex" "you think?" "i fucked your ex" "you fucked her or she fucked you? because i'm sorry, baby, but i really don't think––"

em: sorry, baby, but i really don’t think-

em: SCREAMED

obsetress: that might be my fave lil bit i've ever written adlfkjasdklf

em: dani being a little too interested in jamie getting railed is like. everything to me

obsetress: jamie's already big blushing

em: a little secret between hannah obsetress and em cowlesbian but i am So thinking abt it

em: patreon exclusive exes au au

[em edit: you can imagine how long this lasted]

obsetress: no one is happy about this situation except dani, who is delighted

em: after, jamie's like. what did u mean by u don’t think that...

em: puffs out her chest

em: i could have-

em: danis like yeah but i know u didn’t did u

obsetress: dani clayton ilu

em: danis like um

em: completely unprompted bc dani ‘finishes a conversation 5 hours later’ is really funny to me

em: danis like i did tho

em: jamies like can you DROP IT

em: she’s SMUG

em: she’s so pleased w herself

obsetress: in bed with the lights off jamie's pulling the sheets up and closing her eyes afterthought

obsetress: just a happy lil hum and an "i did, though"

obsetress: and jamie knows IMMEDIATELY what she's talking about

em: dani never lets jamie live it down

obsetress: never!

obsetress: they'll be washing dishes one day "hey baby?" "hmm" "you slept with a landlord"

em: oh um. flipping the whole ‘experienced jamie virginal dani’ trope everyone loves but

em: i love the idea of dani being like hey jamie did u ever- and jamies like (grumbles) does it matter

em: dani is mentally applying a gold star to her chart

obsetress: ksdljfskdfjlsdjflksdjaf

obsetress: the gold star

em: at this point dani is absolute just tryna tease jamie so she’s like oh well when- and jamies like ok i get it

em: jamie Pretends not to be a little interested

obsetress: meanwhile vi and rebecca very matter of factly swapped stories the first day they Realized

obsetress: vibecca swapping stories and their stories complimenting each other so well that they're like well. hmm

obsetress: glad those two found each other

em: two praise kinks u say

em: ok sorry one more thought i’m thinking abt like

em: jamie staying over (idk if this is before or during damie) and viola and perdi are having yet another spat on the phone and violas like

em: no you ALWAYS do this, whatever you think you’re doing with rebecca-‘ and she barely hears some muffled sorta ‘oh, sorry, remember jamie-

em: and jamies doing the maths. hmm

em: jamies like actually i refuse to examine this further. self care

em: brings it up with dani later and dani LOSES her shit laughing

em: haha jamie you got willoughby’ed

obsetress: SCREAMS

obsetress: you got willoughby'd

obsetress: how does one get willoughbyd asking for a friend

em: yeah same asking for a friend

obsetress: dani, gigglesnorting: wait, you hooked up with... with perdi?

obsetress: (dani hates perdita because viola hates perdita and it is a deep seated hatred she refuses to unlearn)

obsetress: a loyalty strange and enduring, despite it all

em: to be fair perdi is the Worst

em: all of these characters i love to make sympathetic and then perdi is where i draw the line akdhdkhd

em: it’s funnier if she’s awful

em: like a viola that never gets therapy

obsetress: lldjfkaskldfj god same

obsetress: it's too good

em: danis like wait hold on. lemme get a pen

em: makes a silly little chart

em: if the fandom tries to make jamie into a shane the l word character i will simply take that and make jamie mortified abt her uh. well! a pretty girl is nice to her and she forgets how to behave

em: jamie's like oh sure like u don’t have embarrassing flings- and danis like yeah but i don’t interact w them on a daily basis jamie

em: also i didn’t fuck perdi

obsetress: skskskflsdflks

obsetress: "you did fuck perdi though, right? because that just be embarrassing, jamie, if she had been the one who..."

em: skgsdjhdkdhdk

em: jamie grumbles something abt pillow princesses and dani like

em: CLAPS her hands in glee

obsetress: jlsdjflkJSDFKJSDFJ

obsetress: GOD

obsetress: she's immediately pulling out her phone to text vi

em: jamies like why would u message her sister that u freak n danis like oh no theyre very open with each other it’s uh. hmm. anyway

#this is one of my faves won’t lie hfydyst #featuring perdita who is. just #a terrible little delight gshdjfjv #idk what to say about this one except um. i’m sorry #and i hope u can still look me in the eye despite #being a grotty little multishipper #the dani jamie viola rebecca exes au #longggg one

[blueyesandleatherjacket]

The Fallen, 8/17

Volume: 1.

Number of parts: 8/17.

Pairings: Nine x Rose.

A/N: Tagging @thebookster on her demand.

“We've all fallen, but at the same time we're not broken. There is the hint that we are going to get up again.” - Amy Lee.

CHAPTER 8:

“So, you’re fresh from the war. Damaged. Broken. Shattered. And you meet that girl. Rose Tyler. She’s showing you that life is worth fighting for. Traveling with her makes you feel alive again. Until her life is threatened. You sacrifice yourself for her to life.” “Don’t say that like it’s a bad thing.” Nash shrugged. She had to pretend that she couldn’t understand the beauty of such a sacrifice. The concept of giving a life to save another should have been unknown to her as an assassin. Giving a life to save the one of the persons you loved was out of her reach though. She never had the chance to meet her soulmate but she had people she would die for. “But it doesn’t go as planned. You feel something is wrong…” “No, that’s not how it went. I just realised I didn’t want to leave her or my ship.” “Your time machine.” “Oh, she’s so much more than a time machine.” “A space ship.” “You’re so far from the truth.” “Anyway, the Doctor was gonna change into another man…” “Yep. And I was gonna die. And I had that irrational and universal thought that I wasn’t ready to die, that there was more to live. I made the wish to be sent back on Earth to stay around the woman I love.” “Even unsure that she would follow you?” “She was left with a new man. She trusted me, my daft old face… He certainly was prettier and younger and funnier to make a perfect match with her but he still remained a stranger. What would you have done?” No response. “I wanted to stay in her life but I woke up in Manchester with that deep conviction that something was wrong.” “Because you sensed that you had half of that Bad Wolf left in your mind.” “And since I could feel the other half around, it meant Rose still had it in hers.” “Which could be fatal to both of you.” “You’ve got it.” “So that Bad Wolf has quite amazing abilities. Meaning you’re some kind of superhuman now. You’ve got the control of Time and you can change whatever you want to. You’re also a telepathic being and you can access people’s mind and create a real mess in there. Change someone’s history, create false memories or erase it all.” “That’s not exactly how it works. There are rules.” “Who cares for the rules when you’re that powerful?” “I have a consciousness. So does the Bad Wolf. You can’t use its power for personal or evil purposes. Time Lords made the rules. They engraved it in their genetic codes. Anyone meddling with Time would go mad.” “Time Lords are megalomaniac. How could they not go against the rules?” “Oh, some have tried. And they paid the price.” “What about you?” “I ran away from home as soon as I could. Their philosophy wasn’t for me. I had my own dreams.” “What now?” “I intend to leave this place, find my Rose and survive this almost human life. Quite boring, I know.” “And the Bad Wolf?” “I only possess a part of its power. I can’t do much. Need my other half to be able to really do something with that power. Unless…” The Doctor voluntarily chose to stop his sentence there, to show a hesitation. Nash would get more curious if he wasn’t giving her all the answers. Or pretending to giving her the answers. He couldn’t forget that she was manipulated by Jeremy Backfire and that his goals weren’t clear enough. No need to give him what he desired by mistake. Better not give them Rose and the other half of the Wolf. He would die protecting them. Dying was exactly the card he was gonna play. So far, the Wolf and him had worked together but he was always in charge, except for some incidents that had happened now and then. The Wolf was remaining hidden for its own safety. I t was just fixing the damages Nash was creating to its human shell when she was done. He would have died a long time ago without this power, which ironically was also killing him. “Unless what? Is there another card you wanna play? You think that talking all the way through that session will save your ass? We can’t even tell what’s true and what’s not.” “It’s up to you to believe me or not. But just so you know, I am fully human and humans can’t handle the power currently stuck in my head.” “Which means?” “I’m slowly dying. The power is burning everything in me and you’re speeding the process up with your methods.” Nash smirked. Maybe she believed him and was concerned for him deep down, but on the outside, she had to act like she didn’t. She had to pretend it was a trick when the doctor inside her wanted to check his words and save him. She couldn’t see it, the power burning his mind and causing rage fits and complete blackouts when he was alone in his cell. He was holding on pretty well so far but he didn’t have much time left. They would realise it soon enough. “Nice try, Doctor.” That new voice turned his blood to ice. Jeremy had been there all along the session and had witnessed their exchange. That explained why she was so tensed and acting like the Quiston Assassin she had once been. Well, you never ceased to be an assassin. You just learnt how to hide this part deep inside you. The Doctor was well placed to know that. Jeremy was done with these games. Now was the time for round two. If the Doctor didn’t want to say the truth, he was gonna talk to his other self, the one he was keeping hidden all the time, and there was only one way to force him out. He came in the room and dismissed Nash who obeyed wordlessly. He pushed the machine to the maximum. However, the Doctor was strong and he resisted. Him and his Wolf were a powerful team. Powerful enough for Jeremy to fly off the handle. The yellow room wasn’t enough. He had to hit harder. The Doctor was breathless. All his body was suffering from the electricity that had just gone through it. He laughed in Jeremy’s face instead of complaining and raging. He was rewarded with a punch in the face. It added more to his physical pain but didn’t affect his mood. He was determined not to let Jeremy win, no matter the cruel things he had in mind to torture him. It was certain that he wouldn’t like them at all. Jeremy was furious. He turned around, opened a drawer and pulled out a needle. He checked the label on it. They had invented a special mix for him. One that wouldn’t wear off in the minutes that followed the injection. One that would keep him awake but unable to move or speak or think. The fluid was injected straight in his jugular vein and slowly followed the course of blood to spread in his whole body until there was nothing of him that could react to Jeremy’s threats. When the Doctor was completely paralysed, Jeremy called a bunch of his subjects to transfer the patient in another room he had never seen before. It looked like an OR, with red walls. There was a metallic table in the centre where he was strapped down. He couldn’t move at all but they were taking no risk. His head was placed in a surgical vice? All around him, the walls and furniture were immaculate, sterilised. There was a whole collection of tools for surgery, all perfectly sterile and waiting to be used on a new Guinea pig. Behind the strong smell of bleach, there was the smell of terror, of blood, of urine. Many had been taken there before him and many had suffered from irremediable damages. Today, the Doctor was gonna get familiar with the red room. Here, they weren’t gonna flood his brain with electricity. They were gonna go further. They were gonna explore the brain itself, for real. Jeremy Backfire was nowhere close to being a neurologist. That was gonna be a disaster. “Well, Doctor, it’s about time we use brand new methods. Forget about the soft ones Nash was using on you. Now, I’m taking the control of your case.” Jeremy slipped a finger down the collection of tools, seemingly looking for the proper one to choose. His mind was already set on the scalpel but making the choice last was playing on the Doctor’s nerves. Everything to make the unwavering man drop his mask of confidence he was wearing so proudly. “See, Doctor, I want something from you and I’m ready to get it at any price.” Jeremy placed his cold hand on the Doctor’s face and folded his ear to clear the way. The scalpel stroked his skin, just above the ear, and cut the tender skin deeply. Blood flowed and ran down his neck. Jeremy put the scalpel down, grabbed a drill and tested it. He pressed the trigger a couple times to make sure it was working. Then he drilled a hole in the Doctor’s skull. The patient was conscious. He was feeling everything and couldn’t defend himself or scream. A brain surgery without anaesthetics. It was gonna push him beyond his limits and forced the Wolf to come out. Exactly what Jeremy was wishing for. He inserted a little sensor in the hole. The Doctor didn’t see it properly but he felt it. A sensor inside his brain. It could have been a sensor to monitor his brain’s activity but he sensed that it was for another purpose. Another method of torture that needed two holes and two sensors, one on each side of his head. He had been scared of death once. Right now, he surprised himself to think that it would be a relief. Jeremy wouldn’t give him that. “Oh, now, you’re scared, big ears,” commented Jeremy, amused. “Excellent. That’s the right attitude. It means you’re gonna give me what I want.” The Doctor did, and not because he chose to. Actually, he tried to resist as much as possible but being electrocuted straight in the brain was proved to be efficient as a torture method. The human abandoned the battle in less than ten minutes. The pain and death threat hanging above its host’s head compelled the Time Entity sleeping in his mind to come out and protect him. So far, it had been too weak to even show up but it had found out that feeding on the evil vibes and negative emotions that were filling this place was more satisfying than feeding on a Time rift like the TARDIS needed. Being in a human body didn’t only have drawbacks. It could now take control and show that damn man who was the real boss around here. The Doctor’s eyes turned gold and a loud growl came from his throat. In the second, all the restraints and sensors vanished in golden particles and the Doctor, possessed by the Wolf, was on his feet. The cuts healed themselves. Jeremy stepped back, a smirk on his lips. He was scared of course. He knew partly what the Wolf was capable of. It was better not to make it angrier. It was mad enough at the moment. “There you are.” “Oh, so I’m the one you expected to see? You happy? Good. Because that’s the last thing you will ever have done in your miserable little life.” The Wolf took another step toward Jeremy. It wanted to lay its hands on him and feel his body disintegrating as it erased him from time and space, as he reduced his whole existence to dust. It had been provoked, but it also had been given the strength to finally be in charge. Wiping Jeremy away would also wipe Maxence away and that wasn’t an option. It had to reduce Jeremy to nothing and yet, keep him alive. There was one simple way to have its revenge on him and run away from here to find the real Doctor. “You think we didn’t plan it all? That we didn’t take any measure for the day you would come out again?” “Oh, you’re getting clever.” “Always have been.” The Wolf snorted, “What do you want from me?” “Do you even have to ask?” “Pure politeness.” Because the Wolf was already in his head and looking for the information it desired. Which wasn’t complicated. Humans were open books. They didn’t have any lock or any barrier to protect their minds. If they knew what was living among them, what was coming for them in the future, they would protect themselves better. At the moment though, it was an opportunity. “Hm. Humans are predictable but you have the merit of being different. On some points at least.” That hospital was only a façade. They were using this asylum to hide their real activities. Their basement had been turned into a lab and a prison for non-terrestrial species. The place was protected by all the human technology available at this time and it was doubled with some alien technology. They were capturing every alien specimen they could find and experimenting on them to get as much information as they could get. Worse than Van Statten and Torchwood. Jeremy had even offered himself some upgrades with this data. And one day, he had heard about the Doctor. “You want me. You want my power to rewrite yourself. My power and my immortality. Basic.” “I want the Doctor and I can’t reach him without you.” “You want to use me to get him?” The Wolf scoffed. “The Doctor left me on Earth, stuck in the mind of his now human former self who didn’t want to die. Do you think he cares about the bomb I am? If he did care, he would have taken me out of here and you wouldn’t have known a thing about it.” “He hasn’t come because he doesn’t know. We caught you before you could do anything and this place intercepts most of the calls. Telepathic or not. You did call him but if he got the message, he never came around.” The Wolf clenched its fist and a golden glow travelled through his veins. The anger burnt in its hosts body and mind. If it had any limit, Jeremy would have crossed them. It was about time to break the man once and for all. “You can’t have me or my power. I won’t let you. And if you want the Doctor to come, draw his attention with something big. Big ball of troubles. He loves that.” “I don’t remember giving you the choice.” Jeremy wasn’t losing his impertinence. “I can’t do anything to neutralise you completely and force you to obey, but I can still break your human shell.” “Go on, try.” Jeremy smirked. The Wolf pressed a hand on his face to reduce his brain to a puddle of grey cells, to make a vegetable of him. It should have seen it coming but it was one of those grey zones. The moments always in flux. The ones where a decision needed to be made. And Jeremy had just taken his when the Wolf chose to attack instead of submitting. There was a whistle caused by a flying object and the Wolf felt a distinct sting in his thigh. A needle. “YOU THINK IT’LL STOP ME?” it roared. It was really mad now. It began the process of killing Jeremy from the inside. Its other hand grabbed his throat and lifted him from the ground. He was struggling against the hand strangling him, his feet dangling in the air, but his face showed a clear victorious expression. “I was just the distraction,” he panted. The door of the room flew open and someone shot five times. The Wolf roared louder as the five needles jabbed in its back. It let go of Jeremy to run to the person who had dared shooting it. But it found itself unable to move anymore. It was losing its power, its control and slowly being numbed by the drugs he had been given. The Doctor couldn’t take over for the moment so the Wolf fought. In vain. It fell to its knees, to Jeremy’s feet who was watching him with a victorious smile. “I always get what I want, Maxence. You should know that.” Those were the last words the Wolf could hear before it completely fell to the ground, beaten by the high dose of modified drugs they had shot him with. Nash would have a furious Wolf to deal with on their next appointment. It wasn’t gonna forget or forgive that. Jeremy would pay for that. Not from the cell. It wanted to face this asshole when it would get his revenge. Just for fun. It would carve it in its memories to never forget. It would laugh about it. However, it would have to wait until later. The nurses chained up the Doctor’s body again and dragged him to his room. Since he was deeply asleep, they didn’t even bother carrying him. Dragging him was less tiring. They threw him in his cell and took away the chains before they left and locked the door behind them.

To be continued...

The Fallen © | 2019 | Tous droits réservés.

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#doctor who #ninth doctor #rose tyler #doctor x rose #dwfic #the fallen

[peachyjie]

Strawberries and Cigarettes || Zhu Zheng Ting

— Author Note :

Tbh, idk if this is still considered a soulmate!au or not. But I just like the concept! This is requested by the lovely @lovee-myseelf , thank you for your request and patience on waiting this piece and I hope you enjoy it :>

— Warning : Well.... there’s a mention of cigarettes in the title but I doubt any would be shown, it’s just a reference so yea. It’s the cliche storyline btw.

— Wc : 8.794

— Pairing : Zhu Zheng Ting - 98!liner Reader

— Genre : Soulmate!au + fluff

— Summary : Sometimes the sense of home, is the person you’re with. Even when they’re far apart, the memories and scent they carry will always lingers

This is the story of you and him, about how you met, how it started and how it ends. The story of 2 different people with 2 different lives.

The Tale – Soulmates from birth, soulmates till death

To you,

Zhu Zheng Ting has the scent of morning mist and light musk in autumn. His scent is strong and soothing whenever he’s near, it’s also subtle and fresh when he’s far. His scent always reminds you of smoke rings that lingers around the air once it’s blown.

Like cigarettes. His strong persona, his charm, his scent.

To him,

You have the scent of plump fruits and freshly bloomed flowers in spring. Your scent is welcoming and sweet whenever you passed by him, it’s also simple and addicting to be remembered when you’re away. Your scent always reminds him of sugar from the sweet shops and bakeries.

Like strawberries. Your sweet persona, your smiles, your scent.

It wasn’t a wonder how people would often turn around and take a double take whenever you’re walking down with Zhengting. It wasn’t a wonder how your parents are also cautious of him whenever he drops by. It wasn’t a wonder how your younger brother is far more than protective on you whenever he sees Zhengting.

Both of you are different, very different from one another. So, it wasn’t a wonder how both of you could attract many attentions.

Zhu Zheng Ting, the High School’s notorious bad-boy. The bad-boy who is mischief and rebellious, moody as he can be and hated summer.

Huang Y/N, the High School’s lovable sweetheart. The sweetheart who is loving and caring, always thin about others and loved summer.

It’s much funnier to know even with such opposite personalities, Zhengting’s fate had always been tangled with yours. Both of you didn’t realizes it at first, but it didn’t take too long for any to catch up on it.

To put it in a more cliché way and simple way, both of you are meant to be. You’re meant to bumped into him, he’s meant to be pulled into your life.

Soulmates

Back in the days, where people still believe in myths of how Greek made theories against soulmates. There is a saying that people are born from each descendant of God or Goddesses. Each descendant will have their own special way to identify their soulmate.

The oracle of Hades and Persephone, God of the Underworld and Goddess of Spring. It’s a simple tale that tells how you and him happened. Where’s one day during her stay in the Underworld, she suddenly missed the essence of life. So, when Hades knew, he tried to find the best solution to ease his loving queen. He grows a whole garden filled with freshly bloomed flowers, tall green trees and bright plumped fruits. She lives in the Underworld happily surrounded by the murky strong scent whilst he grew to love the sweet lively scent.

Giving the Underworld a more diverse scent against its putrid reality.

This is more likely sum up how those who are their descendent are usually have a sensitive smell. They react far too easily on scent, often too sensitive. They would grow uncomfortable when their nose come in contact with putrid and un-pleasant scent, they would find the perfume shops as their only safe haven.

Now, because they have a sensitive nose, it’s very easy for them to know their soulmate. The scent of their soulmate is what defines who is who’s. One whip of their scent and that’s enough to lock them in. The feeling of longing and desire would grow stronger, forever only that one scent will stay with you.

Forever that scent is what soothes you, bringing you the sense of life and the sense home.

The Present – 5 years later

It’s summer, mid-summer in the big city we call China.

The room is shut tightly, the curtains drawn in to block any living daylight that wants to pass. A figure lay deep in slumber under his warm blankets, feeling the comfort against the cool room. It wasn’t until a small slit could be seen from the curtains, the small lining of light crawls itself towards the peaceful male.

It took his system a while to jerk awake against the sudden change of temperature, the blinding light against his closed lid. He groans, moans as he stretched.

He sat up and peaked against his dimly lit room. His mind is trying its best to process the whole situation, trying his best to make his life organized. But what’s a descendant of Hades doing without a very sensitive nose in the morning?

“Ahh… morning breath”, he hissed a little and made his way to the washroom.

When the door opens once again, he’s already in peace. His hand brushed over his freshly washed hair in a delicate manner, his skin still soft from the warm shower, his mouth fresh like the cold sensation of mint. Then, without wasting another second, he pulls the curtains as he lets the summer light into his room.

This is Zhu Zheng Ting, the fresh graduate from university, infamous bad boy in High School, living in his 5 years relationship as your lover and your soulmate.

He smiled a little feeling the sudden nostalgia running into his system, for once he felt the real meaning of peace. Seamlessly forgetting about reality, the reality where he lives with 6 other people under the same roof.

6 chaotic troublemakers

Zhengting shuddered in disgust on the odd stench, his hazy morning mind still processing the whole situation. Then, Zhengting dashes out of his room in a hurry.

“I swear… not again”, he said in a hurry as his feet thundered the wooden floor.

In a speed of light, he ran from his room and thunders down the stairs. He rounded into the corner, dashing into the kitchen as his other hand grabs the fire extinguisher.

In the once clean, sparkling kitchen he cleaned last week is now surrounded by nothing but smoke, a flaming toast and 2 screaming children.

Zhengting stare blankly at the scene, mind failed to process the situation due to his mind being too busy thinking about his thrown away effort. One decided to cease the fire with a cloth, continuously slapping the dry cloth against the flaming fire on the pan.

Like that would work.

When the cloth catches itself on fire, Chengcheng yelled more. His other mate, Justin wasn’t much help either as he was also freaking out by the burnt bread. Without much thought, Zhengting aimed the extinguisher on the pan, ceasing the whole fire in a matter of second.

Then he looked at Chengcheng. “Ge, no—“, and now they have one living snowman in the middle of summer.

Zhengting stare at the now burnt pan, he bought this 2 weeks ago and had yet to use it. He sighed and threw it into the dishwasher before glaring at the 2 children.

“What made you both think it’s a great idea to set the house on fire in this early morning?”, he hissed out. Justin goofily smiled at him whilst Chengcheng was too busy getting the white fluff off him.

“My sister is coming back, so I planned on making her toast!”, the youngest exclaimed gleefully. Zhengting stare at Justin’s pure excitement, the innocence in the child. He wished he could stay mad at him longer, instead he pats Justin head and ushered him away.

“Next time, try not burning the whole house down”, he sighed silently.

“We’re picking her up right? I want to see her quickly!”, Justin whined at him. Zhengting only laughed at the younger’s manner – “I wouldn’t miss meeting her also, Huang”.

When Justin is out of the kitchen, Zhengting finally spare a glance at Chengcheng. The male obviously still disgusted by the fluff texture from earlier, but Zhengting showed no remorse.

“Make sure you gargle and rise, and put on extra deodorant”, and Zhengting was out of the kitchen once again. Leaving the grumpy male, hissing out a sarcastic – “Okay, mom”.

Zhengting smiled softly towards them, feeling the incoming warmth running in his system. The familiar scent of spring rising to his senses, dominating the summer breeze.

You’re finally coming back

*****

The Past – 5 years ago, few weeks before the new semester

Zhengting swore he’ll always be grateful by Wenjun’s decision on spending his summer break working for extra cash. Because if it’s wasn’t for that one phone call Wenjun made, Zhengting wouldn’t know how the us would’ve started.

It was like fate wanted both to finish things quickly, because both of you didn’t have any intention on meeting one another that day.

You were out buying some popsicles to fight the summer heat and a bottle of banana milk for your younger brother, the one and only Huang Justin. Whilst Zhengting, he was awoken from his afternoon nap by Wenjun’s abrupt phone call half whispering, half yelling – “Dude, that girl! She’s here! Hurry up!!”

Wenjun had told him about how the summer job not only granted him some extra cash to spend, but also how it gave him the infamous summer crush experience.

Zhengting never met who had manage to grab Wenjun’s attention this fast, especially since it’s like a week before High School starts again. Wenjun only described you as the polite female who always smile and sweet to everyone.

But he also said about you having a very sensitive nose just like him.

Well, who would know that Wenjun’s tiny crush ended up being the ultimate wingman of his meeting with you. Zhengting is forever grateful by Wenjun, but also pities him as his summer crush ended like that.

“Here’s the change”, he smiled widely at you as his hand extended itself to hand you the spare change.

Mouth biting on the cold ice, you hummed at him as a sign of thank you. It wasn’t until your nose tingles, sensing the odd sensation in the store. You stare at Wenjun confused, then you looked at his neck.

“You changed your cologne”, you blurted out without much thought. Wenjun who’s very much taken aback stared at you in surprised. “H-How did you know?”, he said.

Flustered, you only shake his question away trying your best to avoid any more confrontation. “I’m sorry, forget about it. I have uhh—somewhere to go!”, you said quickly. You took the spare change as fast as you can and dashes your way to the door with your other purchases. “Thank you—“, you said as your eyes wander around him before resting on his tag.

“—Wenjun?”, and BAM!

It was hard to process everything now. Your mind was hazy from fluster, your face was red from embarrassment, now you’re whimpering in pain by the great force of glass hitting your face. Hands on your face, you didn’t even care the once opened one is now on the dirty floor as you still had others dangling on your arm.

You hissed in pain, feeling the throbbing on your nose.

“I’m so sorry”, you looked up towards the figure. Very much not minding their mistake as you’re trying to escape yours. Waving your hand in dismissal, you tried to ease the pain whilst made your way to apologize on the stranger also.

“It’s fine, it was my—“, you choked on your words when you finally grasp on his full feature.

Breathtakingly beautiful

“—fault”, you said mindlessly, sensing your conscious slowly driving you away under his structure. You knew, he wasn’t in your neighborhood. Nobody this perfect would even think on living near your part, yet you rarely saw him even if he lives in the other part of town.

Dressed casually with a white tee and black ripped jeans, the aesthetically pleasing white high-top converse shoes, it fitted him. His eyes were doll like yet sharp, jawline prominent as if god craved so it can cut anyone, his lips are perfectly proportioned, tall and simply beautiful.

But you noticed something more, something more alluring from him.

His scent

The smell of musk and morning mist of autumn in the woods, accompanied by a little fresh stench of mints. It was strong yet delightful, especially with a tinge of smoke in it. Does he smoke? But you hated the smell of smoke and cigarettes, it always caused your nose to react badly. But why does his smelt so nice and sweet? Is it his natural scent?

“Hello?”, you stare blankly at his hand movement, probably confused on the fact you’re literally standing frozen yet looking high as ever.

When you snapped back to reality, you gasped in surprise. “I am so sorry!”, you said and this time you really dashed off the store as quickly as you can. You didn’t care anymore, today was enough embarrassment for you to handle.

Zhengting stare at you in a daze, he kept looking until your figure disappeared around the corner clearly noticing your slight tinged cheeks. Zhengting smiled a little, mostly thinking the small odd interaction was somewhat cute.

“She’s cute, isn’t she?”, Zhengting snapped his head to Wenjun. The male’s arm propped themselves on the metal counter, his head resting on the palms as his eyes stares dotingly at your already disappeared figure.

“Was it necessary for you to call me just for that?”, Zhengting said as he strode over to Wenjun. “You know I hate going out during summer break. Odd odors, mixture of sweats and perfumes, not to mention the unbearable heat”, he hissed out.

Wenjun, noticing the male’s mood changing just quickly grabbed the spare cold milk and throw it at Zhengting.

Without much hassle, Zhengting simply caught it and opened the flap, chugging the cold liquid down his burning throat. The male sighed in content after a few gulps, feeling the sadness as the cold delicacy is already half gone.

“Yo, I think she digs me”, Wenjun boasted. Zhengting stare at the male, his face shows the obvious sarcasm. “It’s true! Just now, she even noticed that I—”

“You changed your perfume?”, Zhengting said causally as he takes another sip of his milk. Wenjun gasped in shock, hands on his mouth for a more dramatic effect.

“You’re not interested in me, are you?”, he asked cautiously at Zhengting, causing the older male throwing the empty carton at him.

“She probably noticed your new scent too strong and stinks”, Zhengting said. He turned his head a little towards Wenjun and smirked – “She isn’t wrong, you know”.

Wenjun huffed a little. “Well—she knows my name!”, he said proudly. Zhengting laughed a little, how gullible could this male get. He pointed out to his name tag, trying his best to calm himself or he’ll risk choking.

“She has eyes, Wenjun. She probably saw your name tag”, and finally Wenjun admit his own defeat. “It’s fine, I’m going to chase her anyways”, Zhengting only hummed a little as his eyes wandered itself on the melting popsicle on the ceramic floor.

Zhengting must admit, he also got himself dazed the moment he sees you. You looked so delicate and innocent, it wasn’t possible to lure a pure dandelion into a pit of acidic water.

You’re like the blooming flowers in spring, like the fruits ripening into its beautiful plump self. Sweet and addicting, like sugar and spices. Zhengting smiled to himself – “she smelled like spring”, he whispered.

Wenjun stare at him in confusion, “like what?”

Zhengting only dismissed the male’s question, still clearly in his own thought. He kept staring at the pool of melted sweet on the ground, your scent still lingers a little in his sense.

Fresh and subtle. “She’s very beautiful”, Zhengting smiled to himself.

By fate or by chance, Zhengting couldn’t wait to see you again.

*****

The Progress – How both finally collides after a few days in High School

During his survival in High School, every single morning will always be the same. Squealing and whispers surrounding him, as the infamous troublemaker really had the guts to set his foot in his parent’s school.

Zhu Zheng Ting, infamous bad boy, troublemaker 101, son of the headmasters. His parents, strict and cold towards him. Forcing their ways against his, ruining not just his childhood but also his life. The only people who crushed his dreams, leaving him empty into nothing in the society.

His persona just drags more people in. Girls would often flaunt themselves on him, showing him how they want him shamelessly. Guys would get close to him just for the sake of status, using him for their own benefits.

Zhengting hated his life, it wasn’t ideal for him. It was probably the reason why he lived his whole life in High School isolated, as a rebel for others to fear him. Zhengting doesn’t need them, he only needed himself and a few problems.

Wenjun is his only friend since childhood, being Zhengting’s neighbor for so long. Despite being a year younger than Zhengting, being hold in a different section of classes from him. He’s probably the only person in the entire school he could trust. The only person who understand who he is and how his life works.

It was during first day of senior year, the very last year of Zhengting’s hellhole. He noticed something different.

Zhengting couldn’t grasped it at first yet it was familiar. So familiar.

Zhengting knows it wasn’t the class, it’s the same old cube where students thinks its jail. It’s also not the bathroom, still putrid at its time. It’s also not the cafeteria, the food still as bland as ever.

It was the air, it’s different.

No odd odor of people, no artificial perfume scents. It was suddenly fresh and welcoming, it felt familiar. Like he smelt it somewhere. It bugs his mind since the beginning of the day until late lunchtime in the cafeteria. And when the door swung open, he swore the whole room smelled like spring, as if petals are falling from the ceiling.

“Sweet! She’s in this school also!”, Wenjun exclaimed nudging on a dazed Zhengting.

In all glory, you were here. You’re actually in his school, studying in his school. Zhengting thought he was dreaming, he actually met you again.

He noticed your confused self, looking around the room before abruptly resting your gaze at him. You furrowed your eyebrows at him, clearly confused on why this person is giving you a staring contest in such open area.

Then he smiled.

You swore, it took you a second to remember who he was. Remembering the last encounter, you just quickly walk back to the door in hope of finding your friend elsewhere.

“Y/N!!”, you stopped. Turning around, the familiar hand suddenly took a hold of yours, dragging you to order some food.

“I told you to wait for me, Xinchun!”, you hissed at the male. Xinchun only smiled sheepishly, ruffling your hair as he apologized.

At the same moment, who would know your small interaction with Xinchun brought more misunderstanding to others. More likely, your soulmate.

“She’s taken? Come on!”, Wenjun threw his utensils back to his tray with a huff. Zhengting only stare, hand gripping on his pair of utensils. It was a foreign feeling for him, he didn’t know who you were, yet he felt sick staring at that small interaction.

He hates it. And for the first time, he didn’t know what to do.

*****

Few days passes, Zhengting slowly grasped small facts regarding your arrival. He learned you’re the new kid in the school, freshly moved with that Xinchun guy. He learned that you’re more to the quieter side, always listening to Xinchun, who’s very contrast from your quietness, always ranting about life 24/7.

It wasn’t unusual now to see Zhengting in a daze, suddenly boring his gaze against your back during lunchtime or whenever he accidentally saw you on the hallway.

What he didn’t know about you was you’re also the observant type. Despite not talking much, you like to observe people quietly. Seeing each one differs from one another, watching as others interact as you stood by the sideline.

It didn’t take you long to notice his on-going stare on you nor his continuous glare to Xinchun. You could always feel his eyes whenever both of you passed by during class changes, or during lunchtime.

Because you’re also observing him from afar. Either he noticed or felt it, your eyes always lingered on his back whenever he passed you. Something about him suddenly attracts you, like he was ready to pull your strings to him.

“So, who’s that summer fling of yours?”, Xinchun once asked you. Your eyes wander around the cafeteria, noticing he’s still on his usual seat with his one and only friend, Wenjun. It was amazing how he still didn’t notice your continuous stare despite he’s always looking at you also.

When you didn’t answer Xinchun’s question, the male took the chance to see what you’re looking at. Or who you’re staring at.

The Zhu Zheng Ting

“God no, babe!”, he hissed at you. You blinked at him innocently, surprise by his sudden outburst. “You’re telling me that guy is your mysterious guy?!”, you literally had to launch yourself on him, closing his mouth with both of your hand for the sake of not letting others hear the conversation.

Xinchun pride your hands off him, glaring at you. “Babe, 3 o’clock is trouble and you’re not getting near him”, he said as he took a small sip of his cup.

You sighed a little on his words. When you began your journey in High School, you’ve also learned a few things about him aside of him having a beautiful face. You’ve noticed he’s the school’s troublemaker of the century, loving son of the headmaster of the school. It was very obvious to see others launch themselves on him just for the sake of their own benefits.

Xinchun was right, he is trouble. You were sure even if you’re bound as soulmates, it would be harder. You wouldn’t know how he works, how your family would gather and do a peace offering, but mostly if both of you will even last.

“I mean it, Y/N”, Xinchun hold his gaze on yours. “Stay away from him”, he was dead serious.

It was probably during your duty in the infirmary was your first official meeting with him. You woke up from the bed after a light nap, just as the door swung open with a small knock.

“Anyone here?”, your body grew rigid. Slowly, you draw the curtains that separates each bed away from your silhouette. In the same moment, Zhengting’s eyes locks itself on yours. Both of you swore it was like death suddenly met life during the match.

“The head is out for the moment, is there any problem?”, you asked him softly, trying your best not to stutter as his eyes kept boring itself on you.

It took him a while to snap back to reality, your scent simply hypnotized him to drive the male far away from reality. He sighed in content, forgetting where and in what situation he’s living in.

“Ehh… sorry?”, he snaps his eyes open and stare at you in shock. “I—uhh… I scraped my knees during practice”, he said.

Your eyes instinctively looked at his gash. It wasn’t a big wound nor that small, you nodded.

His eyes still rest themselves on you even when you’re cleaning the blood off his skin and gash. That day, Zhengting had to hold back all his will for a smile, he’s finally talking to you. The look of concentration you had when you wrap a bandage around his knee was the most precious thing he had ever witness, he felt the beating of his heart increases in each passing second.

“All done!”, you said cheerfully. Looking up, you finally noticed his eyes on yours the whole time.

It took him a while to break the eye contact. Despite no wanting to, he did anyways. He stood up as you’re cleaning up the aftermath from his treatment.

“Thank you”, he said. You smiled and nodded at him a little.

He didn’t go, he still lingers in there for a while. Even after you finished arranging all the supplies on their respective places, he’s still there unmoving, not willing to move.

“Zhengting, I’m Zhu Zheng Ting”, he blurted out. You froze, very much taken aback at his sudden greeting.

“I know”, you blurted out. You swore, you wished you could slap yourself for blurting out random things in such odd situation. He stared at you confused, as if he was asking – you knew?

“I’ve watched—I mean, seen you a few times”, you groaned to yourself for being too obvious, you wished you could run now. He chuckled a little and nodded to himself.

You expected him to bid you a quick goodbye or at the very most, run. He didn’t, instead he gave out a smile and hummed a little.

“I’ve also watched you more than a few times also, Y/N”

You stare at him taken aback, he only smiled sheepishly on you. There, the next chapter finally unfolds.

*****

The Beginning – 4 months into High School

It started during mid-autumn. The leaves are changing colors to a beautiful contrast of orange and red to yellow, the weather is cooling down, and both of you and Zhengting finally made progress.

Sometimes, you would spend some time talking to him. Sometimes, he would pop up during your shift in the infirmary. Most of the time, both of you tried to keep a good distance from one another.

When you’re about to close the infirmary when you noticed a jacket resting on the table. Zhengting had lend you his jacket because you left yours at home. You almost forgot it was still with you until now. Without wasting any second you just quickly pack your things, stuffing his jacket on your arm and just went for the door.

It didn’t take you too long to find him. After all, his scent is very dominant from the other people around.

The slight musk and mint mixed together, it was like smelling autumn during winter days. Zhengting had always have this slight smoke tinge, making you wonder if the troublemaker here does smoke or not.

Your feet stopped after you rounded into one corner, noticing another tall male exiting a room. It was Wenjun.

“I’m going to get us some drinks, kay? Don’t take too long there!”, he said before going off to the opposite direction.

“The dance room?”, you wondered a little.

You could smell the upcoming scent of his getting stronger as each gap closes, the only thing separating you from going near him was the door. You could hear the light traditional music resonating in the room, accompanied by a small thud every now and then.

Without warning, you creaked the door open a little. No stench of sweat or huffing breath, it’s just him.

When you first noticed Zhengting, you’ve already concluded that he’s a beautiful human in existence. This time, you swore you thought you’ve seen an actual angel. The way his body moves along the smooth tones of the music, his whole aura glides to gracefully and delicately, it’s just beautiful. His whole figure glides like no other, as if the music runs into his veins.

Until his eyes locks on yours on the mirror, that’s when he lost his balance.

You screamed a little seeing his whole body impacted the hard floor, quickly running near him to ensure he wasn’t injured.

The moment your hand touches his arm, he just brushed you off harshly. Eyes red as if he’s in rage, huffing to calm his breath. “W-when—since when you were there?”, he said in between breath.

Confused, you didn’t know how to react. “Just now, I was coming to give you back your—”

“Why—No. Get out.”, he said.

You shake your head a little, still unsure if he’s really okay or not. “But, you fell and—”

“Get out, Y/N!”, he hollered out. You grew rigid, shock registering in your system. Quickly, you just scrambled on your feet and was ready to dash for the door. It wasn’t until Zhengting grabs a hold of your arm, his eyes very much in rage.

“Whatever you witnessed just now, don’t tell anyone”, he said. “forget about it”, he hissed out.

Leaving you in your own paranoia, Zhengting never chased you for any sort of explanation since then. He just left you in your own bubble of shock and fear.

In all his life, Zhengting could say he’d fucked up countless time. From disappointing his families until his own parents was ready to disown him at any time, he was okay about it. He didn’t care about them, he despises them anyways.

This time, he knew he fucked up real bad. He knew you’re still in school, he could smell your scent from far away. But you’re really avoiding him.

Sometimes, he could say the sensitive nose has it own perks. You know either someone is there or not, or just you use it to avoid people you don’t want to from their scent.

Whenever you sensed him getting closer, the usual calming scent suddenly become a huge alarm in your head, you just simply took a big U-turn and make a run for it. But that didn’t stop Zhengting from hunting you down.

He made the effort to find you. From getting confrontation of your best friend Xinchun who he found out that the male already has a soulmate until getting dumped by your younger brother who’s 6 years younger than him. The rage in the younger eyes, it was as if Justin was ready to bite him off even if Zhengting is the alpha in charge.

It took Zhengting a while to gather more than enough information to find your whereabouts. When he sees the folder of student bios laying around on his father’s study room, he just took it without consent and scan the thousands of faces on the papers.

There he knew, he just knew how to fix this whole situation as he now got your address. If he couldn’t explain it to you in school, he’ll just talk it out privately near your neighborhood.

Who knew the aftermath caught him in a dazed during a chilly weekend morning. From knowing you’re very loved in the school until discovering you’re also very much cherished at home. Not just by your parents, it was mostly by your brother who recently entered Junior High.

Justin stare at Zhengting from his legs up towards his face, the kid isn’t amused. Justin bites the straw of his banana milk on hand, eyes judging the older male who dare cause a ruckus in the household.

“You’re the douchebag that made my sister cry?”, Justin threw the bullet at him.

Zhengting stood on the yard awkwardly as Justin stare him down, it was amazing to know the kid is by means 6 years younger than him but knows how to dominate people. But that wasn’t the point, you cried?

“You’re really dumb for a troublemaker, you know?”, Justin cackled a little.

Zhengting swore, if this wasn’t for you, he would’ve smacked the kid in place right now. “Tell me where she is”, Zhengting said in a strict tone, hoping it would break down the younger’s hard attitude.

Justin scoffed a little. “You wish”, Justin scoffed at him.

Very much taken aback by Justin’s attack, Zhengting had never expected this much contrast between your brother with you yourself.

“You’re a tornado of trouble, right?”, Justin asked mindlessly as he takes another sip of his milk. Zhengting furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, he was pretty much already afraid of the kid.

“Eh… yea?”, he said unsurely causing a grin on the younger’s face.

Justin clucked his tongue a little, nodding. “Can you fight?”, he asked again.

Zhengting was pretty much already triggered by the question, nonetheless he just nodded again. “Tell you what, one round and I’ll tell you where she is”, Justin said.

Zhengting didn’t know what got into him, all he knew he had the best laugh in the century. Justin only stare at the older male pretty much unamused by his cackling, he only sips his banana milk quietly as he waits for him to finish his laugh.

“I mean it”, he said after Zhengting managed to calm himself. “Hit me once, I’ll tell you where my sister is. I hit you, you got to agree on my one wish then I’ll tell you where she is”, he smirked at Zhengting.

“You’re telling me, you’re going to tell me even if I fail on making a mark on you?”, he scoffed at the younger male.

Justin shurgs. “You’re her soulmate, there’s no reason for me to hold you off her that long”, he said. Justin takes a small step down the front door into the lawn. A small tug on his lips, he stared at Zhengting wildly.

“Come at me, Zhu”, he said. “Let’s see how well you can use your instinct”, and Zhengting launches himself on the young child.

*****

You sighed a little, huffing when you still failed on getting the book you needed. You thought for a while once again before rising up on your tippy toes as your arm reach high for the book on the top shelf.

It was nearing exam seasons and you took the time to revise everything in a more in depth manner. Hence, you decided it was best to spend it in the local library near your neighborhood. At this time of the early weekend, you decided it was best to spend your time revising your arch enemy, advanced calculus.

You huffed once again, now very much annoyed by the fact you’re still unable to get the book. You stare at the spine, very much boring lasers on the dead bounded pages of papers. Again, you tried once again to get the book. Arm stretching as far as you could as you tip toe for an extra helping height to reach the top shelf.

It took you a while to even register the smell of musk suddenly lingers in your senses. No, he couldn’t possibly be here, he doesn’t know this place exist.

When the scent became stronger, you didn’t have time to react fully by the incoming figure. A longer hand reaches out on the respective book you needed, causing you a bigger amount of shock and you turned around.

Alive and in his whole glory, Zhengting is there in front of your eyes.

You stare at him, almost thinking it was just hallucination because you’ve rarely met your soulmate now. He’s not real, it’s just in your mind.

“This is the book you needed right?”, you gasped in shock when he suddenly spoke, he stared at you in confusion.

“It’s not?”, he questioned. You reached out and poke him a little on his arm, feeling the warmth radiating from him. “Oh my god, you’re real”, you whispered to yourself. Zhengting chuckled at your confused self, pretty much amused on how the whole cat and mouse chase made you think.

“Here”, he passed on the book towards you which, you took without questioning as you mumbled a small – “Thank you…”

Then it was back to the awkward silence. Being in a very small space and a very close proximity with Zhengting wasn’t a good idea. You could feel yourself getting hotter at every passing second, especially when his eyes are already boring itself on you.

“Y/N?”, he called out.

Cautiously, you looked at him. He smiled a little, feeling the small beat in his chest rise louder and louder. “I’m sorry”, he said.

“I didn’t mean to suddenly yell at you that day. It was just—“, he sighed a little. “I was just—“, he groaned a little. Zhengting had no idea how he would explain this whole situation towards you, he himself is still lost on his own problem making it harder to explain his own outburst.

Your brother already gave him this opportunity and he can’t let this slip off. After all, Zhengting didn’t just sacrifice his pride to get his ass kicked by a Junior High kid. Damn, when Justin said he learned to fight, Zhengting would’ve never thought it meant I’m a black belt in Taekwondo also!

Zhengting took a small breath, calming his nerve a little. “Y/N”, he said once again. You kept staring at him, more likely very concerned on his behavior in each passing second.

“I think I’m in love with you”, he said.

You felt the slight heat crept itself on your neck, the pink radiating on your cheeks by the confession. Both of you knew, this is bound to happen. But it still gives out the same amount of fluster and nervousness on both actors.

You didn’t know how to exactly continue the whole conversation, instead you gave out a small squeak of “W-what?” in the most unsure manner ever.

“I’m in love with you—“, he said once again. He swallowed a little lump before continuing on. “—and I really want to kiss you right now”, he whispered.

Just like that, everything happened naturally. His hand rested itself on the shelf whilst the other snake towards your back, slowly he inches forward closing the gap. When you felt his lips rest itself on yours, you instinctively rest your hands on the line between his jawline and neck. Feeling far more in bliss, as if this whole situation was too good to be true. The sparks, the butterflies, all mixed into one.

When both finally pulled away, Zhengting only smiled widely at you. “Oh wow”, he whispered to himself. “I am very in love with you”, he said in a daze causing a small fit of laughter out of you in the process.

“I see you’ve met Justin”, you said suddenly. Zhengting only smiled sheepishly as he scratched the back of his head in shame. “It was the only way I could actually find you”, he said.

“I hope he didn’t cause you any injury then”, you said to him. Zhengting laughed, almost sarcastically as he said “No, Justin is a very nice kid anyways”.

“Isn’t he the sweetest?”, you said in pure glee.

Zhengting thought about earlier, the way Justin swiftly threw the male off as a kick landed itself on the older’s waist. Justin smiled at him, softly mumbling towards him. “She’s in the local library down the street”, he said casually. Finally deciding to help the older one out, Justin easily extended a helping hand which Zhengting accepted. When he grabs a hold of the younger’s hand, Justin just clenches it as a warning.

“Make her cry one more time, I’ll break that pretty face of yours”, Justin said softly, a smile still plastered itself on his face.

“Yea, he’s the sweetest”, Zhengting said as he shuddered a little. He swore, Justin Huang will always be the spawn of the devil himself.

*****

The Climax – The last obstacle for Hades and Persephone

When Zhengting graduate 2 years ago, he thought there would be nothing that will hold you away from him. He had the most blissful relationship with you, making memories non-stop. Sure, he had to deal with your parents, who are still cautious around him. And yes, Zhengting still fear Justin. Mostly, Zhengting will never forget about Xinchun being all snappy.

He remembered when Xinchun felt the upmost disbelief and shock when the news was given. “You’ve been dating this douche for almost a year and didn’t tell me?”, he snaps.

Zhengting only pulled you closer as the tiger snaps again as you looked at Xinchun in pure guilt. “We were keeping it subtle”, you mumbled.

“That doesn’t hide the fact you kept it from your best-friend”, he said back. You only mumbled a small apology at him, feeling nothing but pure guilt. When Xinchun leaves out a sigh, you were expecting him to throw another tantrum. Instead, the male ruffles your hair with a wide grin on his face.

“As long as you’re happy, I approve”, he said. Then his eyes locks with Zhengting’s, the smile completely wiped off. “Soulmates or not, if you hurt her, I am murdering you”, he hissed at the male before turning around to hand with Justin.

It’s an iconic memory, for you and Zhengting mostly.

“And I thought only your family is protective on you”, Zhengting said in a daze. You chuckled a little, “They just love me too much”.

He would never had thought time would pass that easily. One day he bumps into you, then the next day you’re both sealed the oath. It went away fast, without notice both started to change. You noticed Zhengting is more of the clingy touchy side, he would often snuggle himself on the crook of your neck.

“You just smelled so good”, he would often say. Sometimes he would ask what is his scent, which you replied easily with – “Like morning mist and smoke, fresh and strong”. It’s like him, painted the picture of who Zhengting truly is.

“Like flowers and sugar, spring and sweet”, he said to you. Just like you, it shows who you truly are in the end. It was cliché to say both of you are too blind for one another, it’s true.

“I am going to marry you one day”, he said during your first summer break as a High School graduate. You laughed at him, he turned around as his eyes glistened in hope. “I mean it, I am going to marry you one day”, he said.

“I believe in you”, you said before you pulled him into another kiss.

Innocent love, sweet and innocent. Like sugar and smoke.

Both of you always thought that nothing would come and ruin the relationship. Nothing. Even after 2 years and during your graduation and summer break. Just plainly in love and in peace. You’re going to univ like him then graduate, then Zhengting would find the right time to finally propose and everything will be official.

“I’m moving to London in a week, Ting”, was the first thing you said during his break from uni. “I’m moving there for college”, you said. Zhengting remembered he still had the smile on his face as his whole body froze, his hand gripped on the doorknob, so tight until his knuckles turned white.

He swore, that day he felt the world fall apart. He felt himself fall apart.

*****

You ran, as fast as your feet could. Passing each hallway to another, running up the stairs towards the other wings. When you stopped, you stare at the same door you visited last time.

The soft tune still resonates in the room, you could feel it vibration running from the wall to the door. Your heart thunders as your hand came in contact with the knob. Then you opened it.

“Ting?”

He turned his head around and you swore you felt your heart broke at the sight. He was shaking, his breath very uneven, eyes red. A sight you’ve never seen before, he’s disoriented. He stared at you in fear, his lips quiver from making any sound but a silent sob.

Dating Zhengting had been nothing but a blessing. He’s different from you, you’re the biggest contrast from him.

He didn’t force you into anything, you would never make him do things he doesn’t want. That day you noticed the difference. Zhengting already knew who you were inside out in just 3 months whilst you had no idea who he truly is. You’re not familiar of the Zhu Zheng Ting you’re dating, your own soulmate.

He’s still the biggest mystery you’d ever have, but you still accept him. You know, one day he will tell you. But you never understand how things escalated this far.

Until he was broken, you were finally lost. This time, you discover he’s not the troublemaker everyone talks about. He has his own problems in life, things he decided to keep to himself from the pity and the guilty eyes of society.

You just ran to him, slamming the door in the end. Soon, he cradles himself in you, desperate for any type of support.

His sobs became more violent, broken the more you hold him. He finally breaks. You slowly hushed him, lulling him to calm down from his own storm. “I—can’t—I”, he stuttered out.

“It’s okay, take your time”, you whispered softly at him. “It’s okay…”, you said.

He cried more. Zhengting didn’t know why, he felt like he found his own safe haven around you, his protection from his own weakness. The only person he could run to, the only person who shall see him in this broken state. You, only you.

“I don’t want you to leave”, he choked out the words. “But I can’t do anything, huh?”, he laughed to himself a little.

“It’s okay, Ting… It’s fine”, you said when he buried himself closer to the crook of your neck.

For once, he doesn’t believe your words.

“I got kicked out”, Zhengting said. The smile engraved itself on his face, his eyes still glistened like crystals. He’s beautiful.

“My parents—“, he choked on his words. “My parents finally kicked me out”, he said.

Zhengting didn’t know why, he felt the huge relief when he finally let loose. He smiled a little. “I was never that famous troublemaker everyone talks about. I caused trouble due to my fear of being used by them—”

He leans closer to your warmth. Instinctively, you wrapped your arms around him, spooning him in. “It’s not a secret that I have good scores that’s considered above average, almost perfect.”, he wondered a little.

“I studied day and night, just for my parents liking. They had no room for games, I was forced to be perfect just because they own this whole institution. Hence, my opinions never matter to them. I was always shunned off from their light, never becoming their priority—"

“I have my own passion, my own dream. I dreamed to get lulled under music, as my mind haze itself on the tune, as a dancer.”, he chuckled. “It never happened. I told them about my plans after High School, I would go to the best university that teaches Traditional Dance and graduate from there. Then I would pursue my life around the world, doing the things I love—“, he choked out.

Slowly, you wiped away the stray tear that left his eyes. Pressing a small kiss on his temple, you hushed him to calm down.

“My father—”, he choked out. “He hits me, he told me to stop thinking about useless things and just focus on reality. My mother only stared at me with the uttermost disappointment in her eyes. I was crushed, I thought I had to stop then”, he laughed a little to himself.

“But I can’t”, he whispered. “The will lingers, I can’t get rid of it that easily.”, he said.

“In the end, I always practice without their knowledge. I hid it from everyone in fear that words will travel around, then in the end my parents would know”, he said. “I’m sorry for that day, I truly am. I didn’t mean to yell at you or even have that outburst! I was paranoid, scared mostly—”

“You didn’t, instead you supported me. Constantly staying whenever I’m in this room. The awe in your face is just too precious and you even told me to chase my own dream, do thing I love.”

“I did, I got accepted in the university I wanted, into the major I love”, his hand tangles itself around yours as he laced his fingers with yours.

“Zhengting, I’m sorr—”

“It’s not your fault”, he said. “I got things covered for the future impact. I chose to tell them in the end. Like I expected, they kicked me out. It doesn’t matter anymore, if they can’t accept my own decision in my own life, then it’s the same they wouldn’t accept me for who I am”, he smiled a little in the end.

“As long as I have you, I’m fine”, he stared at you. He leans closer to your side, closing the small gap. His nose brushed against yours, breath tickling one another. He cups your face on his palms, the most sincere smile on his face.

“Go… I’ll support any decision you make”, he whispered. “I’ll sacrifice some of my happiness for you”, he said. He sighed a little, knowing each passing second means you’re slipping away. He smiled, for you he did.

“I truly love you, Huang Y/N”, and sealed his lips against yours.

Even when heavens rumbles, banned Hades from Olympus itself, he didn’t care. He knew there’s one person who will accept him fully back in the Underworld. His queen, his beloved, Persephone. He will wait for her comeback, and when she’s back in hell, they will fire Olympus down together.

*****

Now – Airport, 12.56 PM

Zhengting sighed loudly when he felt the stinging heat against his arms. He had always hated summer, not just from the heat or odd odors people emits. But bringing the other 6 people with him was like bringing a zoo to a public place.

He stares quietly at Justin and Chengcheng who’s fighting over a popsicle. The youngest is so pissed off, he pushed the whole ice in the older throat and choked Chengcheng in the process. Zeren who’s beside them is freaking out as he tried to calm the choking male. Then Xinchun and Quanzhe was screaming on one another just for the portable mini fan. This is giving the mother a headache.

Zhengting proceeded to stare at Wenjun who’s standing beside him quietly. At least he’s normal, he wondered to himself.

It took him a second to complain on the on-going summer heat. Zhengting swore he felt his heart rate rises up higher and higher each minutes pass.

When he smelled the incoming sweet smell, he knew. It wasn’t just his mind replying all the sweet moment he had spent with you. It was for real.

You didn’t change, your scent still as fresh as ever, sweet like sugar. He smiled to himself, you’re here.

“Jie!!”, Justin yelled when he saw you coming out of the door.

You were lost at first, turning around for any sign of your brother. When you suddenly felt the incoming impact and the familiar scent of Justin, you let out a loud laugh. “Hi turnip, I missed you”, you ruffled his hair.

He literally dragged you towards where the other stood, greeting each one especially Xinchun. “Short as ever”, he said causing you to hit him in the process.

Zhengting chuckled a little, the scent he emits grew stronger and stronger. “Hi”, he said. You smiled at him, then you ran towards him.

Zhengting laughed when he felt your incoming impact on him, he didn’t mind. His arms automatically wrapped itself around you, pulling your closer. You nuzzled your nose around him as he finds his way to your neck, taking a whiff.

The smell of home.

You missed him, you truly missed him. Those 2 years were enough to murder your patience and having him right here in front of you. It felt too good to be true. He’s here, your one and only.

Zhengting pulled away from you slightly, cupping your face in the process. “You never changed”, he said. “I would never”, you said back.

“Welcome back, love”, he said before slowly he leans down and locks his lips around you.

You smiled alongside on the shared contact, feeling the pure bliss running in your system. His hand slowly traces itself on your waist, pulling you closer. The other runs down your other arm, holding your small one in his.

You gasped a little when you felt the cold metal substance slid into one of your fingers. When you pulled out, the first thing you saw was him grinning like a true idiot. You stare at your hand, feeling the pure nostalgia running into you

“I told you”, he said still grinning.

The silver band wraps itself perfectly around your ring finger, the diamond shines under the summer heat. It shines, glistens like no other. He held your hand in his, pulling it towards his face as he lands a small peck on your knuckles.

He gave you a smile, his eyes shine with hope.

“I’m going to marry you one day, Y/N”

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[writingcoward]

What We’re Supposed To Be

Jaune Arc was very used to being anything other than what he was told he had to.  He was told he had to be strong, smart, brave, and a whole host of other things only Pyrrha would ever say he was.

Pyrrha, for her part, was quite unused to the concept.  She had always met and exceeded every expectation placed upon her.  Her methodical perfectionism always earned her high praise from everyone around her.

In light of that, both of them were somewhat surprised by just what she was willing to let him get away with.

They were supposed to be studying.  That was usually the case; though, Jaune being Jaune, it wasn’t unheard of for him to do everything he could to get out of it.  Simply motivating him had always been the hardest part.  Pyrrha insisted he was a very intelligent young man, when he bothered to apply himself.

Jaune usually pretended not to hear for the purpose of making whatever antics he was getting up to funnier.  They both knew he was full of shit, but that was what made it fun.

So of course, when Jaune tried to steer the conversation away from the upcoming history test, Pyrrha was doing her best not to have it.

“C’mon, partner, I grew up around where that happened.  Of I course I know all about the, uh...”  Jaune tapped his chin thoughtfully, looking up and away from Pyrrha to sell the bit.

Pyrrha sighed.  “The battle of Cramoisi Bridge,” she helpfully supplied, “One of the most important battles of the Faunus rebellion to occur on Vale’s soil.”

“The very same!”  Jaune made a show of pointing dramatically, the tip of his finger stopping close to Pyrrha’s face before he poked her on the nose and withdrew the appendage.

“Then, if you know so much about it, perhaps you would be willing to educate me on the subject?”  Anyone else would have seemed the very picture of sarcastic.  Pyrrha, however, seemed earnest enough to give Jaune pause.

Jaune chuckled nervously.  “Maybe some other time.  What I’d really like to talk about is, uh...”  He glanced around the room, looking for a suitable distraction.  His eyes came to a stop on Nora’s radio, and he made a small “ding” noise to himself, imagining a light bulb appearing over his head.

“Yes?”  Pyrrha wasn’t one to force him to end his nonsense, despite her objections to him trying to get out of work.  At the very least, it was a rare day when he couldn’t come up with something that they could laugh about together.

Pyrrha was aware, of course, that she tended to find him funnier than she ought to, but she paid that little mind.

Jaune bounded over to the radio, Pyrrha stifling a giggle at his enthusiasm, and turned it on.  Nora had left it on some bubblegum pop channel, and Jaune had caught the tail end of some song about a girl wanting to confess to her crush.

Running his fingers through the hair on the back of his head, Jaune considered leaving it, but a commercial for auto insurance came on after that, and he quickly decided to look for something else.

Pyrrha, smiling fondly in spite of of herself, stood up and walked over next to Jaune.  She wrapped both arms around one of Jaune’s and rested her chin on his shoulder.  “We should be studying,” she whispered, “Not playing around.”

Jaune scoffed. “I should be studying, you’ll ace the test either way.  Of course, I’m not one to just do things because I should.”  He shot her a grin as he kept flipping through channels.  “That’s more sense than I’ve got.”

Pyrrha playfully swatted at his arm, pouting at him.  “You’re plenty sensible.  You’re just...”

“An idiot?”

“No!”  Pyrrha swatted him again.

“How about a moron?”

“Absolutely not!”  Again, Pyrrha swatted at Jaune’s arm, somewhat harder than the first two times.  Definitely harder than she intended.  Immediately, she felt bad and rubbed the spot where she had struck him.

Pyrrha leaned her head against Jaune’s arm, hugging it tightly.  “I think you’re plenty smart, you know.  You just distract yourself too much.”

Chuckling again, Jaune stopped the radio on some crooning love song from when his grandparents were kids.  “I know, partner.  I know.”

With a swift motion, Jaune grabbed Pyrrha by the shoulders and spun her away from him.

Startled, Pyrrha gave an undignified squeak before coming to a stop.  At some point Jaune had taken her hand, and stood in an exaggerated pose like he intended to dance the salsa with her.  A troubling notion.

“Tell me,” he began, his voice low and altogether too dramatic, “Do you dance?”

Pyrrha scoffed and looked away, but she matched his pose as best she could.  Dancing wasn’t her strongest point, but she wasn’t a slouch at it either.  “You know I do,” she said, trying not to let him see her blush.

Laughing, Jaune spun her inward, and she matched his movement with grace.  Coming to rest behind her, he took her other hand, and spun her around to face him.

“I suppose I already knew that,” he admitted, “But I have one more question.”

He snaked his arms around her waist, pulling her closer until they were chest to chest.

“Do you slow dance?”

Pyrrha tried not to swallow in surprised.

“Because,  because this is slow dancing music, not...  It’s not a fast song.”

His awkwardness helped, but the color still rushed to her cheeks.

“I suppose I don’t have much experience with it,” she confessed, not meeting his gaze.  “I didn’t have a lot of time for dancing growing up.  I mostly just trained.”

Jaune sighed.  “I can’t say I’m surprised.  Honestly, I don’t either, but I know the mechanics and dancing’s probably the one thing I’m good at.”

“Then,” Pyrrha purred, more enthusiastically than she wanted to admit, “If you know so much about it...”  She slowly linked her arms around the back of his neck, enjoying the contact.  “Perhaps you would be willing to educate me on the subject?”

Jaune gulped, his cheeks flushing.  At some point, he had miscalculated, but he was used to that.

“If you insist.”

Jaune repositioned his arms to better suit the motions, his thumb and forefinger finding the exposed strip of skin on Pyrrha’s waist.  He watched her suck in a sudden breath as she felt his touch on her skin, and suddenly he felt extremely warm.

“Ready?”  He whispered the question, less a request for information and more a request for her permission to continue.

Pyrrha nodded, having a hard time finding words that didn’t sound desperate.

Smooth and graceful, Jaune took the lead, and the two began to dance.

They weren’t sure how long it lasted.  They both knew it went on far longer than it should have, far longer than would have been socially acceptable between two friends.  Even so, they didn’t stop.  Not for commercials, not for the quiet sound of Nora opening the door to see what was going on, and not for the click of her quietly closing it either.

They were each lost, held captive in the other’s gaze.  Jaune found himself thinking about just how enchantingly green Pyrrha’s eyes were, Pyrrha found herself obsessing of his blues.

They were supposed to be studying, Pyrrha tried to remind herself, but she was enjoying the dance too much.

Eventually, the two found themselves sitting on Pyrrha’s bed, the radio long silent as Jaune had turned it off before they sat down.  Neither of them spoke, but they allowed their hands to touch on the bed.

Several times, both of them tried to find words to speak, to do anything but just sit there.  They were tantalizingly close, and neither could keep from fantasizing about the feeling of the other’s lips.

Jaune moved first, after a long time, scooting closer on the bed and hoisting Pyrrha into his lap.

Instinctively, Pyrrha wrapped her arms around his neck again, but she managed to keep from squeaking at his lifting her.

“So,” Jaune began, smiling shyly, “We’re supposed to be studying, right?”

“What was that you said about what you’re supposed to be?”

Jaune gasped in mock shock.

“Pyrrha Nikos!  You scandalous dame, you’re supposed to be a good influence on little old me.”

Pyrrha stuck her tongue out at him, prompting Jaune to laugh.

Pouting in mock offense, Pyrrha turned her nose up at him, closing her eyes so he couldn’t see how much fun she was having.  “I’m sure it’s due entirely to your bad influence upon me.  Honestly, leading a young woman like myself astray?  You ought to be ashamed.”

“Lead you astray?”  It was Jaune’s turn to feign offense.  “Why, I would never lead you anywhere but to my side, dear partner.”

Pyrrha opened one eye and met his gaze.  “And pray tell, good sir, what purpose would a proper gentleman be insisting upon having me within arm’s reach for?”

“Well, you seem to like it when I manhandle you like this, but other than that...”

Pyrrha squeaked and blushed furiously, pounded once on Jaune’s chest, and buried her face in his shoulder.  He laughed again, which didn’t help her embarrassment at the accusation.

“It’s alright, partner, it’s alright.  It’s perfectly fine, besides, I like manhandling you.”

Pyrrha only buried her face farther, refusing to come out.

Jaune sighed and leaned back, dragging a startled Pyrrha onto the bed and coming to rest beside her.  Her legs still draped over him, he pulled her close into a tight hug, their faces ending closer than he’d realized they would.

“Okay,” Pyrrha whispered, “Maybe I do like it when you pick me up like that.”

There was another moment that felt like forever before Jaune blurted out what the two of them had both been thinking.

“For some reason, I really want to kiss you, partner.”

Pyrrha whimpered in spite of herself.  After everything, those words from his mouth came as a shock.  She felt like she’d been slapped awake, while simultaneously thinking it had to be a dream.

Jaune regretted saying it.  He wasn’t the type to assume that girls liked him.  Girls didn’t like him, nobody tended to like him.  Right?  Right, he told himself, and felt more and more like an idiot with each passing second.

“I want that, too.”

Pyrrha’s voice was barely audible, but he heard it.  They both went bright red, but they couldn’t look away from each other.  Pyrrha’s hands found their way this Jaune’s chest, Jaune found himself stroking her cheek.

They both felt like they had turned into a complete wreck.  They were both right.

“May I...”  Jaune’s voice was low but strangely resolute.  “May I kiss you?”

Pyrrha’s response came before she could register the question.

“Please.”

“I’m telling you, I saw what I saw!”

Ren scoffed at Nora in mock disdain.

“There’s no way,” he insisted firmly, “They’re both cowards and Jaune’s an idiot about this sort of thing.  I doubt he even knows how he feels.”

“Oh, he absolutely doesn’t,” Nora agreed, “But I’m telling you, they were dancing!  They’re probably making out RIGHT NOW!”

Ren scoffed again and took a sip of water.

“Imagine that!  Two partners making out!  In our dorm!  I wonder what that’s like?  What about you?  Have you ever thought about that kind of thing?  I mean, not making out with me, but like, just sort of thinking about making out with someone as close as a partner.  What a concept.  I wonder if it’s fun, do you think it would be fun?  Not that I want to make out with you, I mean, it’s not that I don’t, I just-”

Ren cleared his throat.  Nora squeaked loud enough to draw attention.

“Do you want me to let you start over?”  Ren smiled fondly at his partner before taking another sip.

Nora’s voice was quiet and shaken when she replied.

“No, no, no, I just.  Let’s talk about something else.  Like.  I don’t know.  Water?”

Ren chuckled softly.

“If you insist.”

#arkos #rwby fanfiction

[bucky-fvcking-barnes]

Falling [Bucky x Reader] Oneshot

Falling: In which Bucky goes from being your best friend to the guy you’re in love with and you have no clue how it happened.

Words: 1,383

Warnings: None, pure fluffiness.

A/N: I can’t believe I’ve written two things in a week?? But when I think about the fact that I wrote this in study hall instead of writing my psych paper I’m not surprised. Happy reading! Xx.

The concept of falling in love is so much prettier than love at first sight, isn’t it? One day you look at a person and see them in a different light than you did before.

That’s exactly how it was when you realized you loved Bucky. One night, you’d gone to bed after having a movie marathon in the common room with your best friend, and the next morning you woke up and you realized that, fuck, you loved Bucky Barnes.

That was three months ago, and you could barely comprehend how it happened because it wasn’t a lie when you said it hit you overnight. You bonded so easily with him when he arrived at the tower; it was always in your nature to be kind to the people you met, so you and Steve were able to bring him out of his shell much quicker than you’d thought possible. You learned quickly that the brunette was actually pretty funny and caring and, hell, even charming. He was a flirter by nature. But he’d never made you blush with his jokes or his comments so easily until the day that you woke up and you couldn’t get him or his damn smile or his gorgeous eyes or his melodious laugh out of your head.

It seemed like every day for three months you had replayed that night in your head. The last night you saw him as just your friend and not someone with whom you desired something more.

The night was uneventful enough, just a typical Friday where you and Bucky sat on the couch in the common room and ate pizza and ice cream and marathoned movies under a shared blanket long after everyone else had gone to bed. You could even remember the movies that you watched that night. Bucky was on an 80’s movie kick, so you two watched The Goonies, then Ghostbusters, then half of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (you’d fallen asleep before it had ended). Was there something he had done differently that night that made you suddenly attracted to him? Maybe it was the fact that you woke up in your room even though you knew you fell asleep on the couch, and it made a warm fuzzy feeling form in your stomach. No, you’d ruled that out long ago, because Bucky always carried you back to your room after movie night. You were never able to stay awake through three movies, but this was the first time that it made you think twice about the gesture and it made you feel all cozy inside. You couldn’t think of one key thing that he had done to make you fall so head over heels for him the very next morning.

That morning you blushed when he helped you reach your cereal that had been placed on a high shelf, and you ducked your head to hide your smile when he told you that you looked beautiful later that day. You almost stopped breathing when he asked you if you wanted to go out to lunch, even though it had been routine for you two to go to the cafe down the block every Saturday afternoon. 

Finally, you had a revelation. There wasn’t one thing he had done on Friday night to make you fall in love with him. It was the things he had done, how he had acted, the entire time you knew him that made you fall more and more each day, you just didn’t realize it until it felt like you were sitting at the bottom of a pit and staring at an obnoxious blinking sign that read, “Yep, you’re in love. Welcome! It’s wonderful here.” The more you thought about it, the more you realized that each day he made you smile more, each joke was a bit funnier, and each morning you had more desire to spend time with Bucky. Even on days he wasn’t there because he was on a mission or when you were on a mission and he was back at the tower, you didn’t go a day without sending him a text or thinking of him in some way. And then that Saturday morning when you woke up to the sun shining through your window and you smiled to yourself when you realized Bucky had brought you to bed you knew. You knew that you were in love with him. You were in love with the guy that had been stone cold the day you met him but now you stayed up into the wee hours of the morning just talking with him, letting him pick your brains about whatever he wanted to know about you. You were in love with the guy who constantly asked you “What’re you thinking about?” when you stared off into space and one too many times recently you had to lie because the truthful answer would have been “You.” You were in love with the guy who always left enough ice cream at the bottom of the carton for you to have because you two had the same favorite flavor and the guy who knew exactly what to order for take out and exactly which restaurant to order it from because “No, Tony, they’re not all the same.” You were in love with the guy who was your best friend and cared so much about making you happy.

So it wasn’t a surprise that today your cheeks were tinged pink as you draped your legs comfortably across Bucky’s lap on the couch while you two watched a show on TV. It was a lazy afternoon at the tower; everyone had finished their training sessions this morning and now people were showered and fed and just hanging out on a rare weekend off. You and Bucky were in the common room; Steve, Sam, and Tony were chatting in the kitchen; Nat and Wanda were out shopping for snacks for your girls night tonight. They’d actually insisted that you didn’t come with them because they wanted you to stay with Bucky, knowing about your crush on him and urging you to finally tell him how you felt. Plus, they just loved to tease you about it.

You weren’t paying attention to what was playing on the television, your mind too focused on the way his thumb rubbed circles onto your thigh absentmindedly while his gaze was fixed on the screen, and the other part of your brain was wondering just how you were going to tell him. Before you could come up with a good and logical plan, a part of you thought, Just say it! and before you could stop yourself a breathy “Bucky” came from your lips.

Almost instantly, his gaze turned to you, and he flashed you a bright smile. “What’s up?” he questioned, seemingly able to see the way the gears were spinning rapidly in your head.

You swallowed, and you could feel your heart pounding, and you didn’t know what to do so you just stared at him, words finally coming to you when he raised an eyebrow in concern. “I’m in love with you.”

Before you had time to be embarrassed or scared or to even move off of the couch, Bucky’s metal hand was holding your leg in place while his flesh hand cupped your jaw and his lips pressed against yours.

For a few moments the rest of the world was completely silent, and then you were broken out of your spell by Tony’s loud voice booming “Finally!” accompanied by wolf whistles and hollers of excitement from Steve and Sam.

 "What are we cheering for?“ You heard Nat’s voice approaching the common room, Wanda right behind her as they were both loaded up with bags of snacks and drinks and magazines.

“Bucky’s gonna get laid!” Sam shouted, and it triggered another chorus of cheers from the five of them as you dropped your head against Bucky’s shoulder in an attempt to hide your grin and your bright red cheeks.

You were sure he could feel how fast your heart was racing, and he slowly moved his fingers beneath your chin so you looked up at him.

“I love you too, by the way,” he whispered, and it only made you smile even more.

- Fin. X.

A/N: There you gooo. I hope you liked it! Fingers crossed I get part 2 written of Poetics this weekend but I’m gonna try to be a good student and make myself finish aforementioned psych paper before I write more fics even though it breaks my heart. As always, thanks for reading! Kaitlyn. Xx.

#writing #marvel #bucky barnes #sebastian stan #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian stan oneshot #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan x reader

[steadfast-chaos]

Meet Me @ 1006

Comments on Episode 26 below

Episode 26 Comments

I don’t understand all the screens in the intro.  Like, why?

Why are you pretending to help this asshole?

Why is Han Wen even there in the first place?

Did Da Jun’s joker ass really fill that bag full of snacks?  You had such potential as a wingman!!

Why is Jia Le in the building?  How did he even manage to take her out?  She’s a judo champion!

Okay, so…on a side note, when Da Jun takes that mask & helmet off, with his cocky expression & messy hair…I am so here for it.

So now, you’re a murderer and a kidnapper?  How did you think this was going to help you, Da Jun?

What are you going to do, Zhen Yu?  You’re in no way qualified for this.

Ugh, sloppy writing strikes again.  I feel like the actors are really selling this, but it’s just so terrible.  It’s like…all the worst parts of a melodrama executed in the worst way.

The fuck happened to this show?

They’re at the same place that his dad died?  No way.

What difference does it make if his dad died saving her in this moment?  It has nothing to do with the fact that you’re a murderer!

This ‘sad’ story is doing nothing for me in garnering sympathy for this asshole.  Like, if they introduced this concept earlier in the story, and somehow used it as a reason that he was caught up with the gangsters & the fake evidence, I would have been more sympathetic, but…dude, you’re a murdering, kidnapping, entitled prat.  No sympathy for you.

I legit want to fast-forward through this right now.

And, also, him dying for Jia Le has nothing to do with you killing your cousin’s girlfriend or the fake evidence or working with Han Wen or any of this shit.

Like, Zhen Yu has a legit reason to hate the world & be resentful, but Da Jun is just personified entitlement.

I don’t know what this whole scene was supposed to make me feel, but I just feel annoyed.  Okay, magic pegasus moment in the middle of a hostage situation is just…*rolls eyes*

Did he just shoot Zhen Yu in the head while trying to commit suicide?  Okay, if you could have gotten out of that chair so easily this whole time, wtf were you doing just sitting there?

God, none of this adds up.  It’s such a lazy way to end what could have been a decent drama.

Did she just take perfectly good flowers and replace them with other perfectly good flowers?

*exasperated*

I am not here for this coma bs.

Aw, I am here for Wen getting a sweet ladyfriend!

Wtf happened to Da Jun?  I hope he got what he deserved!

Si Ming gets a happy ending, Ji Rou gets a version of a happy ending.

They’re going to let that bastard out of jail, though?  Of course you’re still mad at him!  He killed a girl & shot Zhen Yu!

This ending is not really brining the closure that we as an audience deserve.  Like, I legit feel like I wasted my time watching this series for this ending.

Months in a coma and he’s only got peach fuzz?  Damn.

You’ve always been brave, Jia Le.

I wonder if the ‘finger wiggle’ is how coma patients really come back?  Maybe he should kick his feet awake or something considering how god-awful the rest of his episode has been.

I want to go back to the episodes where we were worried she was going to die.  They were way better written.

Why is the horse still doing it’s magic at 1006 when Jia Le didn’t die?  Wasn’t the whole reason for the 46 minutes because that’s the time between him picking up the horse & her dying?

Also…this whole ‘waking up from a coma’ schtick is way funnier than it should have been.  The jerky movements, him getting right out of bed after not moving for a month, I swear….

Does he have amnesia now?  Please don’t let this show go that far down….

He’s walking right away!  Wooooww.

Is the merging going on again?  What’s merging now, though?  Like, he’s not four months in the future, so…wtf?

They just released him?  Just like that?  Oh, man was just in a coma, but I guess he’s okay to just leave now!

Are they psychic now?

This is soooo terrible.  Ugh.

I can’t even enjoy the sweetness with how shit the rest of the episode was.

#meet me @ 1006 #jia le #zhen yu #nikki hsieh #lego lee #spoilers #just awful

[themomsandthecity]

I Struggled With Body Confidence My Whole Life, but My Daughter Changed Everything

In I Feel Pretty, Amy Schumer plays a woman who can't get over the fact that she's not - in her own eyes - beautiful. There's a scene where she's trying to get the attention of a bartender, and he just doesn't see her. Her looks haunt her - in a world obsessed with beautiful people (Met Gala, anyone? Beyoncé at Coachella?) - she feels invisible. I can relate. For most of my life, I've felt that way, too. Or worse, I felt seen, and judged as wrong. Not tall enough. Not small enough. Not thin enough. Not pretty enough. Too big in most places. Never dressed the right way. I have a million stories of the little slings and arrows that contributed to my insecurity. Being a kid who never lost my baby fat. Sucking in my stomach for decades. Hiding as I changed in gym class. Crying in dressing rooms when clothes didn't fit right - or at all - in the biggest size the store had. Related: I Know It Sounds Awful, but I Really Struggle to Teach My Daughter Body Positivity Nothing felt right about me. Not a damn thing, and I didn't get a lot of help from the world in changing that assumption. Television, movies, and magazines showed only beautiful women. Fat people were, with few exceptions, only there to make jokes. Ugly people weren't seen . . . especially ugly women. My mom was too beautiful to understand my insecurities when I was a kid. I didn't have the words to tell my handsome dad. My sister was beautiful, too, with the same red hair as our mother, both of them so often praised and complimented for being a redhead that I hated red hair, my own being utterly boring brown. My brother was quick to point out my physical flaws and mock me for them - I was too fat, my glasses were so thick, I was physically awkward, which seemed to disgust him. I didn't date until I was 19 years old, and it was so hard pretending to be confident after spending an hour trying to hide the breakout on my chin or fluff up my flat hair. Dating didn't make me feel different about myself. In fact, it made me feel worse, since my dating history consisted of three very good-looking guys. What is he doing with her? I imagined people wondering. I wondered it myself. He could do better. Related: This Mom Is Proud That Her "Perfect Body" Went to Her 2 Beautiful Kids Then came the guy I'd marry. By then, I was exhausted from trying to be more than I was - funnier, more interesting, better looking, more ambitious. My last relationship had worn me down to a nub. He was the boyfriend who told me I should lose weight . . . and I did because he was a perfect physical specimen, and so I should at least try, right? (Wrong. I should've dumped him, but it would take me years and years to believe that.) I remember when I met the guy who'd become my husband. I thought, "I'm done trying. He likes me or he doesn't, but I'm not turning myself inside out for someone ever again." And he did like me, then he loved me. He thought I was beautiful. He really believed it. Once, when we were at a wedding, he looked around and said rather smugly, "You're the most beautiful woman in the room." I wasn't. Even his love and sincerity didn't trick me. It was a relief, though, being with a guy who didn't need me to be more than I was. If I had a whopping huge pimple, it was OK that he knew it. If my period was nasty, I could tell him. It sounds so dumb, and yet it was the first time I'd been in a relationship where I'd given myself permission for that kind of honesty. And yet, it was still there, my lurking insecurity, my horror at him walking into the bathroom when I was shaving my legs and didn't have time to suck in my stomach or arrange myself more attractively. He might have thought I was beautiful, but I didn't. I had eyes, didn't I? I knew beautiful, and it wasn't the person I saw in the mirror. Forget being pretty. I failed at motherhood, and it was all I ever wanted. I hated my physical self more than I could ever put into words. Then came pregnancy. I was so happy . . . until I miscarried the day after I told my entire family I was pregnant. It was normal, the doctor said. Sad, but common. I got pregnant again, and waited and waited for the 18-week ultrasound, which revealed a baby with an incomplete heart and brain, a baby who would not make it to term, they said. They were right. At 20 weeks, I gave birth to a baby who would never draw breath. My stupid, stupid body, failing me yet again . . . but this time on the most primal, essential level there was. My sole biological purpose was to procreate. My grandmother had had nine children. Nine! My mother - three kids in four years. I was supposed to excel at this, being a strapping farm worker in size. Wide hips, big boobs, born to breed. Except I couldn't, and I desperately wanted to. I was a failure. Forget being pretty. I failed at motherhood, and it was all I ever wanted. I hated my physical self more than I could ever put into words. My third pregnancy was fraught with terror. I trusted nothing. I waited for doom. At any given day of those 41 weeks, I could've told you how many days it had been since conception. Eight days after my due date, I gave birth to a healthy daughter. What I remember from my labor was a sense of awe. My body was doing things I never knew it could. I got to the hospital at 10 in the morning, and by lunchtime, I was a mother. I was a goddamn superhero. When I held my daughter, I knew I had to be better for her than I'd ever been before. Stronger, braver, more honest, kinder. And not just toward my baby, but toward the world . . . and toward myself. That was when things turned. When I could nurse her, rock her, stay awake for 20 hours soothing her, I was amazed at my physical abilities. When I could carry her on my shoulders and push her on the swing, I liked my strength, my size, my brawny shoulders. When she cuddled against me and declared me "comfy," I liked my soft stomach. When I had to role model confidence and positivity so my daughter would have those qualities, too, I did my flat-out best. And when she looked at me and said, "You're so pretty, Mommy," I knew that I was. When she looked at me and said, "You're so pretty, Mommy," I knew that I was. I've come to like my looks. I think I have a kind face. A ready smile and eyes that hearken back to my Hungarian ancestors. I've accepted my size, which continues to evolve and change as I get older. I'm mostly healthy these days. I try to embrace the gentle humiliations of aging, because I've lost too many friends to dismiss the gift of these 53 years. In my upcoming book, Good Luck With That, two best friends struggle to get to a place of self-acceptance without changing a thing about their physical selves. There's no magical thinking, as there is in I Feel Pretty, no magical concussion. But they get there, step by step, confronting the same things most of us have to, unpacking their issues, together, best friends through it all. In Amy Schumer's movie, Renee walks across the lobby of a Manhattan skyscraper, confident that she's the most beautiful woman in the world. When I walk across a lobby (or a grocery store), I'm confident now, too - not out of the conviction of my beauty, but the knowledge that I'm enough. That I have much to offer. That I'm the mother of two fine people, the wife of a good man, a woman who made a surprisingly successful career for herself, a person who will always help if she can, and with a smile at that. I look just fine. In fact, I look damn good. Kristan Higgins is a New York Times bestselling author of nearly twenty novels. Her latest, Good Luck With That, is available Aug. 7, 2018. http://bit.ly/2Lmu2uK

#I Feel Pretty #body positivity #Personal Essay #Body Confidence #Miscarriage

[deadpanwalking]

Anosognosia (/æˌnɒsɒɡˈnoʊziə/, /æˌnɒsɒɡˈnoʊʒə/; from Ancient Greek ἀ- a-, “without”, νόσος nosos, “disease” and γνῶσις gnōsis, “knowledge”) is a deficit of self-awareness, a condition in which a person with some disability seems unaware of its existence.  It was first named by the neurologist Joseph Babinskiin  in 1914.  Anosognosia results from physiological damage to brain structures, typically to the parietal lobe or a diffuse lesion on the fronto-temporal-parietal area in the right hemisphere, and is thus a neurological disorder.

I mean, the irony of loving literature as much as I do while also managing to fail every English class I’ve ever taken is not lost on me.  When I was a kid, I used to lie awake praying that God would have some fucking pity and reach into my cranium to hotwire it until it made sense.

During my junior year of high school, one of my counselors finally thought to have me tested instead of writing me off as an underachieving asshole.  My verbal IQ score was fifty points above my performance IQ (“You’ve got the engine of a Porsche in the body of a Ford Taurus,” the testing psychologist had said, and to this day I can’t think of a better way to explain it).

I was officially diagnosed with a Non-Verbal Learning Disability© (an affiliate of Autism Corp. & subsidiary of Right Hemisphere Brain Dysfunction enterprises) but since I wasn’t showing obvious physiological symptoms aside from being clumsy, nobody really thought to look further than that.  

It netted me extended time on tests and papers which was enough until I got to college, and then it wasn’t.  At all.  The less said about that, the better.

Anyway, I wasn’t too far off with that first concept—at least the part about reaching into my cranium.  Last week’s MRI shows that a congenital arachnoid cyst on my right frontotemporal lobe has had a thumb on the scale from day one —the left hemisphere compensated by making me rely on my verbal skills for almost everything, but when it came time to, say,  compose an essay or do rote geometry or manage my time during an exam, I instantly became that kid from the Midvale School for the Gifted comic.

Q: But surely, brain surgery is kind of drastic, considering the fact that the cyst is benign, right?

(The punchline to this would be even funnier if I hadn’t spent years being abused and ridiculed and humiliated over being unable to do my fucking homework; if trying to stay in college didn’t almost kill me; if dropping out didn’t incinerate whatever was left of my self-worth.)

A:  Nope.  At any point, a low-risk endoscopic decompression procedure would have definitely made a whole host of cognitive and executive functions so much simpler for me.

For the longest time, I thought that if I could just bring home a report card that wasn’t a fucking trashfire, it would unlock the secret level where my mom didn’t hurt me, and now I get that she would have found another excuse—but at least I could have had a chance to thrive and grow in some meaningful way, you know?  Instead, I am finding this arachnoid crap out at 34, at the tail end of a protracted grieving process for a stillborn dream of teaching metaphysical poetry to undergrads (I’m at whichever Kübler-Ross stage where you Accept The Things You Cannot Change while concurrently getting drunk and/or high).  

Jesus.  Like, I just wanted some technician to wave an electromagnet over my head so that I could maybe have a few good months in between depressive episodes and now I have to think about how some sack of cerebrospinal fluid in my brain was doing some Keyser Söze ass shit the whole time I was trying to live my life.

#a large part of me wishes i'd never gone down this path but if the surgery is still an option of course i'll fucking go for it #this is some flowers for algernon shit though #this whole week has just been [that one white guy blinking in disbelief dot gif] #stupid science bitch couldn't even make i more smarter #personal #don't be the dick who reblogs this #right hemisphere shitshow tag

[muffinsnotebook]

Mac n Cheese Pt. 2

crossposted on ao3.  

pt. 1 pt. 3

[screams: FINALLY!!!]

Chapter 2: Cupcakes and Kimchi

When Kim Seokjin had graduated from culinary school at the top of his class, complete with recommendations from the chef he’d trained under at the restaurant (and a spot at said restaurant), Namjoon, then his best friend (and secretly long-time crush), had given him this high quality, absolutely beautiful, 7-piece knife set made of carbon stainless steel alloy for his graduation gift.

On their first anniversary as a couple, Namjoon gifts him a leather knife carrier bag for it. The next day, they receive an email congratulating them on their first Michelin star.

Seokjin makes sure to maintain them properly, puts them in a polished cherry wood block, placed by the corner next to the small hook where he hangs his aprons - one in pastel pink, one in chocolate brown. After he’d gotten back from the hospital and put the boys to sleep, he’d taken them all out of the leather bag and cleaned them meticulously, storing them back in the wooden block.

With all the stress and grief he's had to grappled with for the past few days, adding on the fact that he now has a three-week leave (for the first time since…never), he inevitably forgets about them being of easy access on his granite counter.

Until he stumbles into the kitchen to see Taehyung wielding about his extra sharp, high-carbon stainless steel 8 inch chef’s knife on top of the kitchen island.

“Ban…KAI!” The seven year old yells, swinging the knife about with two hands. Seokjin promptly gets a heart attack.

“Kim Taehyung, what are you doing?!” He whisper-yells, just barely remembering he’d just put Jeongguk to sleep for the afternoon.

Taehyung turns to him, then grins excitedly, brandishing the chef knife like a samurai. “I’m a reaper from BLEACH! This is my ban…KAI!” He swings again in a wide downward arc.

“Taehyungie, that’s not a toy; that’s a real knife - you could hurt yourself with that.” Seokjin says slowly, carefully making his way to the younger boy. “Can you please give that back? You didn’t even ask permission from me if you could borrow it.”

The elder inwardly congratulated himself for sounding steady and calm despite feeling a nanometer away from fainting. Predictably, the young boy pouts as he lowers his arms, and reluctantly allows Seokjin to take it from his grasp.

“Will you please get down from the kitchen island before you trip and hit your head?” Seokjin pleads as he puts back his knife in the block, and hefts the heavy wood up onto a cabinet, far from their reach.

Taehyung complies with a disappointed whine. “Uncle Jin is no fun at all.” He pouts, then stomps off into the living room.

And Seokjin is indignant, because excuse you, I am a ton of fun! and because yah! That’s the second time you’ve insulted me, Kim Taehyung!

“Excuse you? I am so very much full of fun!” He hollers after the boy. “Like, tons of fun! You simply don’t appreciate my sense of humor!”

“No thanks, Uncle Jin, I like your food better.” Taehyung replies as he wraps his arms around Jimin instead, who’s watching some cartoon on the TV. The compliment to his cooking is rather backhanded, and Seokjin isn’t mollified one bit.

“You don’t believe me? You haven’t even heard me tell you a joke! I’ll have you know, that I know plenty of jokes! In fact, my handsome face is a--“

“Joke!”

“AH kkamjjagiya!” Seokjin whirls around, on the brink of a heart attack once more, because Jeongguk - whom he could’ve sworn he’d just put to sleep - is sitting on the couch, wide awake, and repeating “joke! joke!” gleefully.

Jimin and Taehyung burst into raucous laughter. Seokjin glowers to no avail, as Jeongguk only laughs along with his brothers.

"I can't decide who was funnier - Ggukie or Uncle Jin!" Taehyung gasps, tears leaking from his eyes. Okay that's a bit too much now, Seokjin thinks sulkily.

Jimin proves him wrong. "Both?"

It’s the first time Kim Seokjin considers that he may have just adopted the three most savage children in the entire world. He considers it for a moment - just a tiny moment.

After all, children change, don’t they? Surely, surely, they’ll come around and love him too much to slay him like this…? Aren't they even too young to slay people like this...?

“See? I am a lot of fun - I just made you laugh, didn’t I?” Seokjin tries to brush it off - because they’re children, and their laughter has been scarce and far too precious these past few weeks.

Jimin shakes his head. “Uh-uh. That wasn’t you - that was Jeonggukie’s joke! Uncle Jin was just the butt of the joke.”

Savages. Savages, the lot of them.

.

.

.

“So how have the kids been, hyung?” Hoseok’s cheerful voice filters in through the receiver with a slight crackle. Seokjin heaves a tired sigh, as he slumps on his couch.

“Ah, it’s been tiring! It’s like they never run out of energy!” Seokjin whines halfheartedly. “They’re sleeping now - thank god, I thought they’d never sleep. Taehyungie and Ggukie wouldn’t stop jumping all over the bed - I was so scared one of them was going to fall off and hit their heads!”

“These kids sound fun,” Hoseok laughs.

“It’s not funny!” Seokjin huffs. “Taehyung even managed to get a hold of my chef knife and started swinging it around on top of the kitchen island! I swear to god, I’m going to have a heart attack one of these days. Wait - I think I see a gray hair on my head.”

“So dramatic, hyung,” Hoseok replies, still laughing. Jerk - not even a hint of sympathy. “You’re not even that old - heck, you’re not even 30!”

And Seokjin isn’t. Seokjin is twenty-six, fairly young for an executive chef, and part owner, of a restaurant on the outskirts of Cheongdam, and in all honesty, is pretty much a child at heart still. He’s been a maknae for most of his life, having been born late in the year among his peers; and even with his dongsaengs, he’s never been fussy beyond honorifics and basic courtesy - partly because the dongsaengs he’s close with are pretty much set with their own lives, and don’t often ask him for advice, so much as a listening ear.

Obviously, his newest dongsaengs - his nephews! - will require more care and attention than a bunch of self sufficient young adults. Seokjin isn’t confident he can actually pull off being a decent hyung, let alone a responsible guardian to toddlers.

But a quitter is the last thing Seokjin is. And when the going gets tough, he toughens himself up even more.

They called him a disgusting faggot when he came out, and then later on again, for falling head over heels for Namjoon. But Seokjin looks in the mirror every day, and sees a handsome face staring back - which, he believes only gets more handsome when juxtaposed beside Namjoon’s dimpled smile. So be it if he's a faggot; he’s pretty sure he’s one of the most handsome faggots in the whole of fucking Asia, if not the whole world - the modeling gigs that kept coming even after he officially quit are testament to his attractiveness.

They called him a failure for dropping a business degree in favor of culinary arts. Seokjin had worked his ass off in culinary school, shamelessly asking the kind chefs at the Gangnam restaurant he worked at for cooking tips. Now his restaurant is the talk of the town; and they’re on the running for their second Michelin Star - if the food inspectors haven’t dropped by already.

Namjoon had told him he’s the type who blooms the most in adversity. Seokjin may not know a thing about child rearing, but he’ll be damned if he didn’t become the best uncle-hyung-parent-guardian for Jimin, Taehyung and Jeongguk.

He’ll be patient, and kind, and fun, and wise, and loving, like the perfect hyung-uncle there ever could be.

…It’s easier said than done, however.

In fact, it’s infinitely difficult to even spell patience when Jeongguk sitting on the hardwood floor of the living room, drawing colorful flowers and stars on the back of his white. leather. couch.

Using permanent. neon colored. pens.

“Kim Jeongguk!” He shrieks, his ears, and neck hot with anger. The four year old jumps, dropping his colored pens as he turns to Seokjin with huge, dark eyes, getting shinier and shinier with unshed tears, lips wobbling and hands trembling.

Uh oh.

The hot rage that had filled him not even three seconds ago evaporates just as fast, replaced with heavy stabs of guilt. Goddammit, he didn’t even do anything wrong! A juvenile part of Seokjin wants to stomp and pout, because his beautiful, white leather couch, and Jeongguk was the one in the wrong!

Instead, Seokjin sinks to a crouch, tugging Jeongguk gently but firmly in front of him.

He takes a deep calming breath through his nose, and scrunches his face into the stern, calm mask he wears in front of new kitchen staff. It takes everything in him to maintain it for more than a few seconds when big, fat teardrops trickle down Jeongguk’s cheeks.

“Jeonggukie, the couch is where people sit. It’s not meant for drawing on flowers and stars. We don’t draw or paint on couches, okay?” And in a perfect world, Jeongguk would nod at his words, and apologize, and Seokjin would give him a kiss on the cheek, and they’d go on with their lives peacefully.

But it is not a perfect world, and instead, Jeongguk only begins to wail loudly, summoning his older brothers into the room.

“What’s wrong?” Taehyung asks, stopping just shy of the Scene of the CrimeTM, looking between his uncle and his younger brother. Jeongguk, spotting his hyungs, ducks beneath Seokjin’s grasp and runs to Jimin, wailing, “hyungie!”

“What’s wrong, Ggukie?” Jimin asks, his short arms wrapping protectively around his younger brother. He shoots an accusatory look at his uncle, and Seokjin thinks he would’ve found the whole concept of it cute, if he weren’t the (very wrongfully accused!) receiver of it. As it is, Jimin’s look makes Seokjin feel as though he’s Mother Gothel incarnate.

“I was just telling Jeonggukie that the couch isn’t for drawing on,” Seokjin says defensively. “Drawings and paintings are best on paper, so we can put them in frames and hang them on the walls for everyone to see!”

He calls Jeongguk to look at him, who only does so with a little coaxing from Jimin. “Ggukie, next time you want to draw, just ask me for paper, okay? I’m not asking you to stop drawing, but I just want you to do it on the right materials. Furniture is not one of them.”

“…mm’kay,” Jeongguk eventually nods, pout still in place.

“That goes for all of you, okay?” Seokjin says, looking pointedly at Taehyung, who had grabbed the yellow marker to fill in the wriggly star shape Jeongguk had drawn. He straightens up with a start, immediately stuffing the pen behind his back.

“Yes Uncle Jin, I promise!” He grins, glances at his work, then adds, “I won’t do it again next time.”

Seokjin stares at him unimpressed, then sighs in defeat. “Right, so before this whole thing happened, I was about to ask you guys to help me decorate some cupcakes in the kitchen--“

“Cupcakes!?!” The three boys look at each other wide-eyed and mouths agape. Seokjin blinks, and they’re gone, shoving past each other as they race into the kitchen.

“Hey, wait for me! And don’t touch anything yet!”

Of course, by the time he gets there, the warning is too late, and the kids are already half covered in the blue-green icing he’d prepared while they had been napping. The three are kneeling on the barstools on the kitchen island, frosting each other’s hands and face.

“I see you found the buttercream,” Seokjin says wryly. Taehyung promptly aims the half-filled piping bag at his face and squeezes.

Seokjin tries to yell indignantly but only ends up with a mouthful of buttercream frosting. He hears Jeongguk cackling heartily - the sound is positively evil and contagious for such a cute child. Jimin swipes his thumb at his cheek to taste.

“What do you think? Tasty?” Seokjin asks, swiping at the blob on Jimin’s nose to do the same.

“It’s delicious!”

“Dewishoos!” Jeongguk echoes again with a giggle, sucking at the frosting on his knuckles.

“Good,” Seokjin takes out another piping bag - full of pink frosting, this time - from the fridge, pulling the tray of warm, freshly baked cupcakes closer to them. “Now, how about we actually put the frosting on the cupcakes?”

.

.

.

Despite Seokjin’s efforts, none of the frosting actually gets on any of the cupcakes.

“It’s cute,” Namjoon says as he takes in the photo on Seokjin’s phone. He’d come over straight from closing up the restaurant. “So cute.”

In the photo, Jeongguk is sat between his hyungs, cheeks stuffed to bursting, with crumbs of cupcake and frosting and sprinkles - yes, they’d found the sprinkles, too - smeared across his forehead and cheeks, and even some on his hair. Taehyung is on his left, triumphantly holding up the deflated piping bag, covered with even more frosting and sprinkles. Jimin is on the right, smiling close-lipped, with just a hint of the dimples below his eyes peeking through, holding on to a half eaten cupcake (his fifth, that time).

The kitchen island in front of them lies in a colorful carnage - blue-green and pink buttercream frosting everywhere, piles of rainbow sprinkles here and there (a small mound of red ones in front of Jeongguk), and cupcake bits and crumbs everywhere else.

The rest of the kitchen, and his phone notwithstanding. Seokjin, however, thinks getting buttercream all over his phone screen is worth capturing the ‘kodak moment’.

“Yes, well, the mess isn’t so cute.” Seokjin replies dryly, though his expression remains soft. Namjoon chuckles with a sympathetic smile, moving to knead at the knot of muscle on Seokjin’s shoulder. Like magic, the elder sags under his hand, letting out a drawn out sigh.

“Want me to help you clean up?” Because it really isn’t a matter of need, so much as whether Seokjin actually wants Namjoon in his kitchen. Even Namjoon wouldn’t let himself in his own kitchen for anything more than pouring hot water in his instant ramyeon.

Seokjin hums, debating the pros and cons of letting Namjoon into his kitchen.

“I can stick to rags and gathering the trash,” Namjoon offers and Seokjin acquiesces. It’ll take him hours to clean up everything by himself, and the kids have worn him out for the day. It’s late at night, and Seokjin’s just managed to clean up the rest of the apartment after cleaning up and putting the kids to sleep. To say that he’s exhausted is a huge understatement.

“Yes, please.”

Despite handling most of the logistics and other managerial paperwork involved in running a restaurant, Namjoon knows his way around the kitchen - “his way around” being mostly how-to-clean (The Namjoon EditionTM) and what-can-be-cleaned (The Namjoon 2nd EditionTM) and where-stuff-are (What To Avoid, The Namjoon Special EditionTM). It’s the only reason he gets allowed in the kitchen.

Quietly, the two make their way into the kitchen, and Namjoon whistles at the absolute wreck lying in wait. A part of him is in disbelief that Seokjin had actually allowed this much chaos into his hallowed space. Much like the counter in the photo, the rest of the kitchen is smeared with frosting and sprinkles, with puffs of flour and splotches of batter mixed in.

It looks like a giant cupcake bomb exploded in the kitchen.

Namjoon remembers the genuine smiles on the kids’ face from the photo, and doesn't ask pointless questions.

“How are the kids?” He asks instead as he takes the rag Seokjin hands him and begins wiping down the island.

“I think Jeongguk is the least affected - but then again, he’s still pretty young.” Seokjin replies as he washes the utensils. “I’m worried about Jimin the most - he gets pretty quiet most of the time, and I always catch him dazed or lost in thought…” Seokjin trails off, then sighs.

“I just want them to not be so sad anymore, but,” He cuts himself off, biting his lips as he scrubs furiously at the imaginary stain in his mixing bowl.

“But you’re still sad about it, too,” Namjoon continues for him in a quiet voice. He watches in mute sympathy when Seokjin’s shoulders slump, his hands dropping the bowl to grip on the edge of the sink instead.

His sobs are but quiet sniffles, shoulders quivering as even then he tries to stifle them. Namjoon silently wraps himself around him - careful not to catch his own soapy hands on Seokjin’s shirt - and tucks his chin over Seokjin’s shoulder.

Seokjin doesn’t cry louder or harder, nor does he stop. But he lets his back rest against the warmth of Namjoon’s chest, quietly accepts his comfort, his support, trusting him to catch the pieces of himself he can’t hold on his own.

“I miss him,” Seokjin confesses painfully, “I miss him so bad, Joonie.”

Namjoon recalls only about less than a handful of other instances when Seokjin has fallen apart like this, when Namjoon has to be there to catch the tiny shards that manage to escape the elder’s tight grasp. When Namjoon has to be the one to whisper the words of positivity and comfort that otherwise fell from Seokjin’s lips on a daily basis.

Namjoon is usually the one who falls apart more often, the one who goes to Seokjin, to let his hyung gather the pieces of himself after he’s ripped himself apart from thinking too much, from scrutinizing his own reflection to the point of self-loathing.

Even before they began dating, they had already been each other’s rock. Perhaps it’s precisely because they’ve glued the shattered pieces of themselves, both on their own, and for each other, that they can do it now with practiced ease, with lesser words, with lesser reservations. Perhaps in the process, they’ve kept tiny pieces of each other, mistakenly glued it to their own, that they now match more seamlessly, complement each other nigh effortlessly.

Yoongi had always grouched about the long time they’ve spent dancing around each other, cautiously treading, moving back and forth in their relationship before finally getting together. And sometimes, Namjoon, who overthinks too much even for two people, agrees, falls into a minor slump, allows the what-ifs to trickle in. But Seokjin, who gazes fixedly on brighter horizons, reassures, cajoles him back, saying, “Wine and cheese and kimchi, Namjoon; time only makes us better.”

Time the magician, the best cook especially in Korean cuisine, transforms, changes, often for the better, when tempered just right. Like traditional kimchi, prepared with care and attention, then left for Time to work its magic, to bring forth something to fill the stomach, to warm the heart. Like a time capsule leaving only the best parts to keep the memories aged but richer, more precious.

Seokjin remembers being young and feeling neglected by parents too immersed in the future, too detached from home. Remembers seeing a TV drama of a mother making kimchi with the rest of the family. Remembers his brother and their housekeeper - an old widow who loved them like grandchildren - making kimchi with him, traditional clay urn and all, on the kitchen floor, and burying it in garden. Remembers his own impatient fingers swiping at the leftover spicy paste, dipping scraps of cabbage and tasting, wrinkling his nose. “Doesn’t taste right.”

His brother had laughed, flicking his forehead lightly. Their housekeeper, affectionately called halmeoni, had clicked her tongue. “That’s because Time hasn’t done her part yet. The last ingredient is something only Time, the greatest cook there is, to do it’s magic. Only Time can make everything better.”

Only Time can make everything better. Can untangle webs and knots that choke the present, and even the past. Can heal, can soothe.

Eventually, they move again, go back to cleaning the sticky creams and pasty smears. Seokjin allows his mind to empty, allows himself to surrender to the peace that the mundane routine of cleaning provides. He paces himself slow and steady, never mind the lingering tears that slip and stray still.

Eventually, the kitchen is once more spotless, with less hazardous materials lying about within easy reach of tiny fingers. Some of his nicer, more fragile porcelain are stored in the upper cupboards, replaced for the sturdier plastics and child-friendly ceramics.

Namjoon lugs over the bag of fruits he’d brought from the restaurant, places it in the colorful bowl Seokjin set out on the island. Seokjin brings out a small glass jar of kimchi from the fridge and two chopsticks. Namjoon (very carefully) takes out the wine and two wineglasses, and (even more carefully) sets them on the table next to the kimchi.

It’s midnight, and the rest of the apartment is dark and silent, the world outside, muted and far away. In the kitchen, Seokjin and Namjoon eat kimchi and drink wine together, sharing memories of Seokjin’s brother.

Company, to ease the flow of Time.

.

Alone, Jimin curls up by the window, searching for the second star on the left, on top of the moon. But there is no moon tonight. And little Jimin aches, feeling left behind once more.

Taehyung breathes quietly, the space beside him where Jimin had been, too cold for sleep, and the hollow in his chest icy in the night.

Jeongguk dreams of colors and warmth, whispers, "eomma, appa," in the silent room.

-end of chapter 2-

- Miss March Muffin 

#mac n cheese #chapter 2 #cupcakes and kimchi #chef! kim seokjin #jung hoseok #kid! kim taehyung #kid! park jimin #kid! jeon jungkook #restaurant manager! kim namjoon #namjin #hurt/comfort #fluff and humor #bts fanfic #fanfic

[topfygad]

Free Climbing the Monastery in the City of Petra, Jordan

“Get down!” the native Bedouin man shouted. “Not allowed!”

A clumsy-looking twenty-something with blonde dreadlocks and a peach-fuzz beard peeked his head over the sting of the cliff after which shortly withdrew himself.

“No no! You come down! Police are right here!”

I regarded subsequent to me—the thin policeman was sprawled out throughout your complete sofa, eyes locked shut, with a thick stream of saliva operating down his hanging chin. He wasn’t waking up any time quickly.

Two extra Bedouin males, with chiseled options, wavy, darkish hair, and Jack Sparrow eye-shadow rushed the scene. They ran to the underside of the Monastery and waited for the awkward twenty-something as he got here scampering down on two very nervous legs.

“Whaaaaat?” I heard him stutter, in that drawn out German accent we vacationers know so effectively. “What’s the issue?”

“Unlawful!” the 2 pirates referred to as out. “Give me entrance ticket. And passport!”

With a Turkish espresso in hand, I turned to verify the sofa once more. The policeman had been shaken awake by one of many locals and, in his groggy state of delirium, was struggling to determine what the hell was happening.

An older authority determine with slicked-back hair and a strong mustache stepped in and grabbed the German by the arm. I heard his poor excuses, appearing like he didn’t understand it wasn’t allowed, however the indicators that mentioned ‘NO CLIMBING’ had been simply too huge to be ignored.

The locals handed over his entry ticket and passport to the mustachioed man, and I watched with delight because the German vacationer was escorted away.

Wanting down on the Monastery in Petra

Visiting the Historical Metropolis of Petra, Jordan

Named as one of many New Seven Wonders of the World, the “rose purple metropolis” is believed to have been constructed 2,300 years in the past because the capital metropolis of the Nabataeans (historic Arabians). This metropolis of stone lies among the many Jordanian mountains in a big valley which runs from the Useless Sea to the Gulf of Aqaba. It’s a half-built, half-carved red-rock metropolis surrounded by towering sandstone passageways and gorges which appear to envelop anybody strolling by them.

Based on UNESCO, the traditional metropolis of Petra “turned, throughout Hellenistic and Roman occasions, a significant caravan centre for the incense of Arabia, the silks of China and the spices of India, a crossroads between Arabia, Egypt and Syria-Phoenicia.”

Via annexation to the Romans and a big earthquake in 363 AD, commerce routes started to vary, and by the seventh century AD, the one individuals who remained within the metropolis of Petra had been the native Bedouin tribe. Petra was not even identified to the Western World till the early 1800’s when a European traveler disguised himself as an Arab and snuck into the legendary metropolis, revealing its existence to the remainder of the world.

A small boy is enveloped by the partitions of the Siq at Petra

The Monuments of Petra, Jordan

There are 23 traditionally vital websites and monuments inside the traditional metropolis of Petra. Immediately, the 2 essential monuments are the Treasury (128ft) and the Monastery (158ft), probably the most spectacular and well-preserved carvings within the park. Their kinds are Hellenistic in nature, having been influenced significantly by Greek structure.

Upon coming into town of Petra, the primary and most recognizable monument is the Treasury, the aim of which, to this present day, stays considerably of a thriller. The Treasury is topped with an urn which was as soon as believed to hide a pharaoh’s hidden treasures. The Bedouins tried to dislodge them by taking pictures down the urn, discovering nothing, however leaving bullet-holes within the face of the rock which may nonetheless be seen right now.

The second most recognizable monument in Petra (and the biggest) is the Monastery which was used for non secular symposiums. Although the Treasury can’t be climbed, the Monastery as soon as might be. Immediately, as a result of preservation efforts, climbing to the highest is prohibited…

Camels in entrance of the Treasury within the historic metropolis of Petra

Who’re the Bedouins?

In Arabic, the phrase Bedouin actually interprets to desert dweller. This group of nomads has been drifting throughout the Arabian and Syrian sands for hundreds of years, residing among the many harsh panorama of the desert since lengthy earlier than the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan ever existed.

The Bedouin tribe of Petra often called Al B’doul declare to be descendants of the Nabataeans who occupied the realm on the end result of the Roman Empire. They lived within the caves right here for greater than 170 years till 1985 when Petra Nationwide Park was declared a UNESCO World Heritage web site.

For preservation functions, and with the assistance of UNESCO, Jordan forcibly resettled the B’doul from Petra to a close-by village. Petra is now not an energetic metropolis and is now a tourism vacation spot largely run and operated by the Bedouins. The federal government gives the native inhabitants with help, schooling, and healthcare, however many nonetheless favor the normal nomadic lifestyle.

In an effort to reclaim their cultural identification, some B’doul have returned to town of Petra in opposition to authorities ordinances.

Because the Bedouins are vacationers themselves, they’re infamous for his or her hospitality in the direction of different vacationers they arrive throughout. The legendary legal guidelines of the Bedouin folks dictate that, ought to a traveler stick with them for 3 days, no private particulars are required, and the Bedouins won’t ask for even their identify. On the fourth day, nevertheless, there’s a price, and that price comes within the type of info.

Professional tip: In case you are touring to town of Petra by yourself, carry your luggage with you and make associates with the native Bedouins. They might provide to allow you to stick with them simply exterior the park, and although they could cost a nominal price, the expertise can be effectively price it.

An area Bedouin from Petra

Climbing to the Prime of the Monastery

The espresso was scrumptious and the view was much more spectacular. I used to be tucked right into a shady nook of an out of doors cafe on the base of the Monastery in Petra, Jordan. I had been sitting in my cozy purple sofa for lengthy sufficient when a wiry Bedouin man of about 30 lifted his wrinkled chin to me, squinted his darkish eyes, and shouted, “The place you from?”

“USA!” I responded. “You?” I believed I used to be being humorous.

“My mom!” he referred to as again. He was being even funnier.

I appreciated these guys instantly—they knew how you can take a joke, and so they knew how you can give it simply nearly as good.

“You wanna go up high?” Mohammad requested. I grinned.

Only a (Bedouin) man and his donkey

Simply 30 minutes earlier I had been watching as Mohammed yelled on the German vacationer. However when he supplied to take me to the highest, I didn’t communicate a phrase of it. In spite of everything, that is their turf, and so they can do as they please.

With lengthy strides, Mohammad bounded in the direction of the carved rock face of the Monastery and I adopted behind him. Once we arrived on the precise facet of it, the place there was nothing however a vertical rock wall, he scaled proper up it with out even breaking stride.

With Spiderman-like glue on his ft, he caught to the rock and leaned again down to increase his arm. I didn’t understand we’d be free-climbing 158 ft up a vertical cliff. I finished for a second, questioning whether or not or not this was actually such a good suggestion, and determined that if he might do it, I might, too.

I pretended to not see his outstretched arm and I pulled myself up behind him. Gasps echoed all through the group that had been watching on from the cafe.

I obtained this.

View of the Monastery from above

Remembering an article written by writer and pal, Bruce, entitled “Lease a Actual Man in Borneo,” I watched in amazement as Mohammad expertly scaled up the wall. He was one of many actual males that Northam talks about—the kind of man who lives within the desert, navigates the weather, and is aware of how you can climb partitions.

I fumbled my approach up, not practically as shortly as him, however with somewhat little bit of expertise beneath my belt I had a good sufficient concept of what I used to be doing. In spite of everything, I’ve been mountain climbing in New Zealand, free soloing in Thailand, and canyoning in Colombia.

About two-thirds of my approach up the rock face I reached an advanced set of holds. I stalled, not figuring out what I used to be presupposed to do subsequent. Right here I used to be, 100 ft within the air, with no seen approach up and only one doubtless approach down.

Shit.

The considered falling from a cliff, someplace deep within the coronary heart of the Center East, thundered by my mind. My coronary heart raced, and I drew an prolonged, dusty breath of air into my lungs. With out realizing what was occurring, Mohammad’s arms got here down from above, grabbed the shoulder straps of my backpack, and pulled me as much as his degree.

I regarded above me and, already, he was gone. He had scrambled the remainder of the best way to the highest and disappeared over the cliff’s edge.

He was like a spider-monkey, this one.

I, too, scrabbled the remainder of the best way to the highest, one foothold after the opposite, and as I pulled myself up over the ledge, the group under broke out in wild cheers. My legs trembled with nervousness and pleasure as I stood up straight and circled to look down over the ledge behind me. My coronary heart thudded inside my chest, sweat burned into my eyes, and I beamed.

“Over right here!” Mohammad referred to as. “You stand there. Take picture. I soar!”

Petra soar shot!

I watched on in amazement as he set himself up with a 20 foot operating begin and jumped 15 ft to the ledge under him. One slight misstep in his touchdown and he would discover himself tumbling over the sting, falling 158 ft to his loss of life.

However regardless of. He obtained this.

Mohammad stood on the sidelines, watching me act like an ecstatic youngster, operating across the round lid of the central urn which crowns the Monastery. He took a seat on the ledge and requested me to hitch. My abdomen muscle tissues tightened, and I lowered myself down subsequent to him, waving my ft on the vacationers under.

We sat for just a few moments, and he advised me tales of his brothers and the place he was from. He advised me secrets and techniques of Petra and the Monastery. He advised me concerning the time he spent the evening up right here with a woman.

After which he advised me that he’d see me down on the backside. And like that, he was gone.

A number of extra picture ops and I made a decision to not be the second vacationer to get taken away by a mustachioed man that day. I took to the closed-off stairs subsequent to the monument (the one embellished with the large ‘NO CLIMBING’ signal) and I descended.

Sitting on high of the Monastery

Whose Land is it Anyway?

My actions that day are controversial. Climbing the Monastery is forbidden, and lots of would possibly argue that I shouldn’t have accomplished it.

These folks could be proper, and as somebody who cares significantly about accountable tourism, I might be inclined to agree with them. However I provide two various arguments.

400,000 folks visited town of Petra final yr (which is definitely 50% lower than in 2010, as a result of conflicts in neighboring Iraq and Syria). If all 400,000 climbed to the highest of the Monastery, preservation efforts can be fruitless and Petra would fall into bodily decline. A number of climbers right here and there, nevertheless, make a lot much less of a distinction, particularly contemplating this monument was constructed to be climbed.

However erosion is an actual factor, and vacationers do have a approach of ruining issues.

View from the highest of the Monastery within the metropolis of Petra

Alternatively, my actions had been endorsed by the locals who’ve inhabited the land for hundreds of years. I didn’t take it upon myself to climb alone—I used to be introduced by an area, one who has climbed this monument a whole lot of occasions and one who rightfully claims this land as his personal.

I made associates with the Bedouins that day, and in return they determined to share with me one thing they treasure—a hidden gem of Petra—a view not typically skilled by exterior guests. It’s an expertise they hold near their coronary heart, solely sharing it with a few of those that select to honor their tradition and their land.

Was I disrespectful? To UNESCO, maybe. However this territory belongs to the Bedouins, and it’s our accountability to play by the principles of the locals once we are a customer in a brand new land.

Should you do that, and also you make a real effort to get to know and honor the locals, they may honor you again. And although they may not take you to the highest of the Monastery, perhaps they’ll share with you one other little hidden piece of their world.

On high of the Monastery within the metropolis of Petra

READ NEXT: Visiting The Pyramids of Giza: Is it Protected to Journey to Egypt?

Disclaimer: This journey to Petra was made doable by Vacationer Israel and Abraham Excursions who supplied me with this tour in change for different journalistic providers. Collaborations like this permit me to proceed bringing you the perfect content material I can, and so they by no means sacrifice the integrity of my phrases. Neither Vacationer Israel nor Abraham Excursions took half in, or condoned my climbing of the monument. This was accomplished in my spare time and with out the data or consent of the tour guides or organizers.

from Cheapr Travels https://ift.tt/2SYxRN6 via https://ift.tt/2NIqXKN

[topfygad]

Free Climbing the Monastery in the City of Petra, Jordan

“Get down!” the native Bedouin man shouted. “Not allowed!”

A clumsy-looking twenty-something with blonde dreadlocks and a peach-fuzz beard peeked his head over the sting of the cliff after which shortly withdrew himself.

“No no! You come down! Police are right here!”

I regarded subsequent to me—the thin policeman was sprawled out throughout your complete sofa, eyes locked shut, with a thick stream of saliva operating down his hanging chin. He wasn’t waking up any time quickly.

Two extra Bedouin males, with chiseled options, wavy, darkish hair, and Jack Sparrow eye-shadow rushed the scene. They ran to the underside of the Monastery and waited for the awkward twenty-something as he got here scampering down on two very nervous legs.

“Whaaaaat?” I heard him stutter, in that drawn out German accent we vacationers know so effectively. “What’s the issue?”

“Unlawful!” the 2 pirates referred to as out. “Give me entrance ticket. And passport!”

With a Turkish espresso in hand, I turned to verify the sofa once more. The policeman had been shaken awake by one of many locals and, in his groggy state of delirium, was struggling to determine what the hell was happening.

An older authority determine with slicked-back hair and a strong mustache stepped in and grabbed the German by the arm. I heard his poor excuses, appearing like he didn’t understand it wasn’t allowed, however the indicators that mentioned ‘NO CLIMBING’ had been simply too huge to be ignored.

The locals handed over his entry ticket and passport to the mustachioed man, and I watched with delight because the German vacationer was escorted away.

Wanting down on the Monastery in Petra

Visiting the Historical Metropolis of Petra, Jordan

Named as one of many New Seven Wonders of the World, the “rose purple metropolis” is believed to have been constructed 2,300 years in the past because the capital metropolis of the Nabataeans (historic Arabians). This metropolis of stone lies among the many Jordanian mountains in a big valley which runs from the Useless Sea to the Gulf of Aqaba. It’s a half-built, half-carved red-rock metropolis surrounded by towering sandstone passageways and gorges which appear to envelop anybody strolling by them.

Based on UNESCO, the traditional metropolis of Petra “turned, throughout Hellenistic and Roman occasions, a significant caravan centre for the incense of Arabia, the silks of China and the spices of India, a crossroads between Arabia, Egypt and Syria-Phoenicia.”

Via annexation to the Romans and a big earthquake in 363 AD, commerce routes started to vary, and by the seventh century AD, the one individuals who remained within the metropolis of Petra had been the native Bedouin tribe. Petra was not even identified to the Western World till the early 1800’s when a European traveler disguised himself as an Arab and snuck into the legendary metropolis, revealing its existence to the remainder of the world.

A small boy is enveloped by the partitions of the Siq at Petra

The Monuments of Petra, Jordan

There are 23 traditionally vital websites and monuments inside the traditional metropolis of Petra. Immediately, the 2 essential monuments are the Treasury (128ft) and the Monastery (158ft), probably the most spectacular and well-preserved carvings within the park. Their kinds are Hellenistic in nature, having been influenced significantly by Greek structure.

Upon coming into town of Petra, the primary and most recognizable monument is the Treasury, the aim of which, to this present day, stays considerably of a thriller. The Treasury is topped with an urn which was as soon as believed to hide a pharaoh’s hidden treasures. The Bedouins tried to dislodge them by taking pictures down the urn, discovering nothing, however leaving bullet-holes within the face of the rock which may nonetheless be seen right now.

The second most recognizable monument in Petra (and the biggest) is the Monastery which was used for non secular symposiums. Although the Treasury can’t be climbed, the Monastery as soon as might be. Immediately, as a result of preservation efforts, climbing to the highest is prohibited…

Camels in entrance of the Treasury within the historic metropolis of Petra

Who’re the Bedouins?

In Arabic, the phrase Bedouin actually interprets to desert dweller. This group of nomads has been drifting throughout the Arabian and Syrian sands for hundreds of years, residing among the many harsh panorama of the desert since lengthy earlier than the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan ever existed.

The Bedouin tribe of Petra often called Al B’doul declare to be descendants of the Nabataeans who occupied the realm on the end result of the Roman Empire. They lived within the caves right here for greater than 170 years till 1985 when Petra Nationwide Park was declared a UNESCO World Heritage web site.

For preservation functions, and with the assistance of UNESCO, Jordan forcibly resettled the B’doul from Petra to a close-by village. Petra is now not an energetic metropolis and is now a tourism vacation spot largely run and operated by the Bedouins. The federal government gives the native inhabitants with help, schooling, and healthcare, however many nonetheless favor the normal nomadic lifestyle.

In an effort to reclaim their cultural identification, some B’doul have returned to town of Petra in opposition to authorities ordinances.

Because the Bedouins are vacationers themselves, they’re infamous for his or her hospitality in the direction of different vacationers they arrive throughout. The legendary legal guidelines of the Bedouin folks dictate that, ought to a traveler stick with them for 3 days, no private particulars are required, and the Bedouins won’t ask for even their identify. On the fourth day, nevertheless, there’s a price, and that price comes within the type of info.

Professional tip: In case you are touring to town of Petra by yourself, carry your luggage with you and make associates with the native Bedouins. They might provide to allow you to stick with them simply exterior the park, and although they could cost a nominal price, the expertise can be effectively price it.

An area Bedouin from Petra

Climbing to the Prime of the Monastery

The espresso was scrumptious and the view was much more spectacular. I used to be tucked right into a shady nook of an out of doors cafe on the base of the Monastery in Petra, Jordan. I had been sitting in my cozy purple sofa for lengthy sufficient when a wiry Bedouin man of about 30 lifted his wrinkled chin to me, squinted his darkish eyes, and shouted, “The place you from?”

“USA!” I responded. “You?” I believed I used to be being humorous.

“My mom!” he referred to as again. He was being even funnier.

I appreciated these guys instantly—they knew how you can take a joke, and so they knew how you can give it simply nearly as good.

“You wanna go up high?” Mohammad requested. I grinned.

Only a (Bedouin) man and his donkey

Simply 30 minutes earlier I had been watching as Mohammed yelled on the German vacationer. However when he supplied to take me to the highest, I didn’t communicate a phrase of it. In spite of everything, that is their turf, and so they can do as they please.

With lengthy strides, Mohammad bounded in the direction of the carved rock face of the Monastery and I adopted behind him. Once we arrived on the precise facet of it, the place there was nothing however a vertical rock wall, he scaled proper up it with out even breaking stride.

With Spiderman-like glue on his ft, he caught to the rock and leaned again down to increase his arm. I didn’t understand we’d be free-climbing 158 ft up a vertical cliff. I finished for a second, questioning whether or not or not this was actually such a good suggestion, and determined that if he might do it, I might, too.

I pretended to not see his outstretched arm and I pulled myself up behind him. Gasps echoed all through the group that had been watching on from the cafe.

I obtained this.

View of the Monastery from above

Remembering an article written by writer and pal, Bruce, entitled “Lease a Actual Man in Borneo,” I watched in amazement as Mohammad expertly scaled up the wall. He was one of many actual males that Northam talks about—the kind of man who lives within the desert, navigates the weather, and is aware of how you can climb partitions.

I fumbled my approach up, not practically as shortly as him, however with somewhat little bit of expertise beneath my belt I had a good sufficient concept of what I used to be doing. In spite of everything, I’ve been mountain climbing in New Zealand, free soloing in Thailand, and canyoning in Colombia.

About two-thirds of my approach up the rock face I reached an advanced set of holds. I stalled, not figuring out what I used to be presupposed to do subsequent. Right here I used to be, 100 ft within the air, with no seen approach up and only one doubtless approach down.

Shit.

The considered falling from a cliff, someplace deep within the coronary heart of the Center East, thundered by my mind. My coronary heart raced, and I drew an prolonged, dusty breath of air into my lungs. With out realizing what was occurring, Mohammad’s arms got here down from above, grabbed the shoulder straps of my backpack, and pulled me as much as his degree.

I regarded above me and, already, he was gone. He had scrambled the remainder of the best way to the highest and disappeared over the cliff’s edge.

He was like a spider-monkey, this one.

I, too, scrabbled the remainder of the best way to the highest, one foothold after the opposite, and as I pulled myself up over the ledge, the group under broke out in wild cheers. My legs trembled with nervousness and pleasure as I stood up straight and circled to look down over the ledge behind me. My coronary heart thudded inside my chest, sweat burned into my eyes, and I beamed.

“Over right here!” Mohammad referred to as. “You stand there. Take picture. I soar!”

Petra soar shot!

I watched on in amazement as he set himself up with a 20 foot operating begin and jumped 15 ft to the ledge under him. One slight misstep in his touchdown and he would discover himself tumbling over the sting, falling 158 ft to his loss of life.

However regardless of. He obtained this.

Mohammad stood on the sidelines, watching me act like an ecstatic youngster, operating across the round lid of the central urn which crowns the Monastery. He took a seat on the ledge and requested me to hitch. My abdomen muscle tissues tightened, and I lowered myself down subsequent to him, waving my ft on the vacationers under.

We sat for just a few moments, and he advised me tales of his brothers and the place he was from. He advised me secrets and techniques of Petra and the Monastery. He advised me concerning the time he spent the evening up right here with a woman.

After which he advised me that he’d see me down on the backside. And like that, he was gone.

A number of extra picture ops and I made a decision to not be the second vacationer to get taken away by a mustachioed man that day. I took to the closed-off stairs subsequent to the monument (the one embellished with the large ‘NO CLIMBING’ signal) and I descended.

Sitting on high of the Monastery

Whose Land is it Anyway?

My actions that day are controversial. Climbing the Monastery is forbidden, and lots of would possibly argue that I shouldn’t have accomplished it.

These folks could be proper, and as somebody who cares significantly about accountable tourism, I might be inclined to agree with them. However I provide two various arguments.

400,000 folks visited town of Petra final yr (which is definitely 50% lower than in 2010, as a result of conflicts in neighboring Iraq and Syria). If all 400,000 climbed to the highest of the Monastery, preservation efforts can be fruitless and Petra would fall into bodily decline. A number of climbers right here and there, nevertheless, make a lot much less of a distinction, particularly contemplating this monument was constructed to be climbed.

However erosion is an actual factor, and vacationers do have a approach of ruining issues.

View from the highest of the Monastery within the metropolis of Petra

Alternatively, my actions had been endorsed by the locals who’ve inhabited the land for hundreds of years. I didn’t take it upon myself to climb alone—I used to be introduced by an area, one who has climbed this monument a whole lot of occasions and one who rightfully claims this land as his personal.

I made associates with the Bedouins that day, and in return they determined to share with me one thing they treasure—a hidden gem of Petra—a view not typically skilled by exterior guests. It’s an expertise they hold near their coronary heart, solely sharing it with a few of those that select to honor their tradition and their land.

Was I disrespectful? To UNESCO, maybe. However this territory belongs to the Bedouins, and it’s our accountability to play by the principles of the locals once we are a customer in a brand new land.

Should you do that, and also you make a real effort to get to know and honor the locals, they may honor you again. And although they may not take you to the highest of the Monastery, perhaps they’ll share with you one other little hidden piece of their world.

On high of the Monastery within the metropolis of Petra

READ NEXT: Visiting The Pyramids of Giza: Is it Protected to Journey to Egypt?

Disclaimer: This journey to Petra was made doable by Vacationer Israel and Abraham Excursions who supplied me with this tour in change for different journalistic providers. Collaborations like this permit me to proceed bringing you the perfect content material I can, and so they by no means sacrifice the integrity of my phrases. Neither Vacationer Israel nor Abraham Excursions took half in, or condoned my climbing of the monument. This was accomplished in my spare time and with out the data or consent of the tour guides or organizers.

source http://cheaprtravels.com/free-climbing-the-monastery-in-the-city-of-petra-jordan/

[topfygad]

Free Climbing the Monastery in the City of Petra, Jordan

“Get down!” the native Bedouin man shouted. “Not allowed!”

A clumsy-looking twenty-something with blonde dreadlocks and a peach-fuzz beard peeked his head over the sting of the cliff after which shortly withdrew himself.

“No no! You come down! Police are right here!”

I regarded subsequent to me—the thin policeman was sprawled out throughout your complete sofa, eyes locked shut, with a thick stream of saliva operating down his hanging chin. He wasn’t waking up any time quickly.

Two extra Bedouin males, with chiseled options, wavy, darkish hair, and Jack Sparrow eye-shadow rushed the scene. They ran to the underside of the Monastery and waited for the awkward twenty-something as he got here scampering down on two very nervous legs.

“Whaaaaat?” I heard him stutter, in that drawn out German accent we vacationers know so effectively. “What’s the issue?”

“Unlawful!” the 2 pirates referred to as out. “Give me entrance ticket. And passport!”

With a Turkish espresso in hand, I turned to verify the sofa once more. The policeman had been shaken awake by one of many locals and, in his groggy state of delirium, was struggling to determine what the hell was happening.

An older authority determine with slicked-back hair and a strong mustache stepped in and grabbed the German by the arm. I heard his poor excuses, appearing like he didn’t understand it wasn’t allowed, however the indicators that mentioned ‘NO CLIMBING’ had been simply too huge to be ignored.

The locals handed over his entry ticket and passport to the mustachioed man, and I watched with delight because the German vacationer was escorted away.

Wanting down on the Monastery in Petra

Visiting the Historical Metropolis of Petra, Jordan

Named as one of many New Seven Wonders of the World, the “rose purple metropolis” is believed to have been constructed 2,300 years in the past because the capital metropolis of the Nabataeans (historic Arabians). This metropolis of stone lies among the many Jordanian mountains in a big valley which runs from the Useless Sea to the Gulf of Aqaba. It’s a half-built, half-carved red-rock metropolis surrounded by towering sandstone passageways and gorges which appear to envelop anybody strolling by them.

Based on UNESCO, the traditional metropolis of Petra “turned, throughout Hellenistic and Roman occasions, a significant caravan centre for the incense of Arabia, the silks of China and the spices of India, a crossroads between Arabia, Egypt and Syria-Phoenicia.”

Via annexation to the Romans and a big earthquake in 363 AD, commerce routes started to vary, and by the seventh century AD, the one individuals who remained within the metropolis of Petra had been the native Bedouin tribe. Petra was not even identified to the Western World till the early 1800’s when a European traveler disguised himself as an Arab and snuck into the legendary metropolis, revealing its existence to the remainder of the world.

A small boy is enveloped by the partitions of the Siq at Petra

The Monuments of Petra, Jordan

There are 23 traditionally vital websites and monuments inside the traditional metropolis of Petra. Immediately, the 2 essential monuments are the Treasury (128ft) and the Monastery (158ft), probably the most spectacular and well-preserved carvings within the park. Their kinds are Hellenistic in nature, having been influenced significantly by Greek structure.

Upon coming into town of Petra, the primary and most recognizable monument is the Treasury, the aim of which, to this present day, stays considerably of a thriller. The Treasury is topped with an urn which was as soon as believed to hide a pharaoh’s hidden treasures. The Bedouins tried to dislodge them by taking pictures down the urn, discovering nothing, however leaving bullet-holes within the face of the rock which may nonetheless be seen right now.

The second most recognizable monument in Petra (and the biggest) is the Monastery which was used for non secular symposiums. Although the Treasury can’t be climbed, the Monastery as soon as might be. Immediately, as a result of preservation efforts, climbing to the highest is prohibited…

Camels in entrance of the Treasury within the historic metropolis of Petra

Who’re the Bedouins?

In Arabic, the phrase Bedouin actually interprets to desert dweller. This group of nomads has been drifting throughout the Arabian and Syrian sands for hundreds of years, residing among the many harsh panorama of the desert since lengthy earlier than the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan ever existed.

The Bedouin tribe of Petra often called Al B’doul declare to be descendants of the Nabataeans who occupied the realm on the end result of the Roman Empire. They lived within the caves right here for greater than 170 years till 1985 when Petra Nationwide Park was declared a UNESCO World Heritage web site.

For preservation functions, and with the assistance of UNESCO, Jordan forcibly resettled the B’doul from Petra to a close-by village. Petra is now not an energetic metropolis and is now a tourism vacation spot largely run and operated by the Bedouins. The federal government gives the native inhabitants with help, schooling, and healthcare, however many nonetheless favor the normal nomadic lifestyle.

In an effort to reclaim their cultural identification, some B’doul have returned to town of Petra in opposition to authorities ordinances.

Because the Bedouins are vacationers themselves, they’re infamous for his or her hospitality in the direction of different vacationers they arrive throughout. The legendary legal guidelines of the Bedouin folks dictate that, ought to a traveler stick with them for 3 days, no private particulars are required, and the Bedouins won’t ask for even their identify. On the fourth day, nevertheless, there’s a price, and that price comes within the type of info.

Professional tip: In case you are touring to town of Petra by yourself, carry your luggage with you and make associates with the native Bedouins. They might provide to allow you to stick with them simply exterior the park, and although they could cost a nominal price, the expertise can be effectively price it.

An area Bedouin from Petra

Climbing to the Prime of the Monastery

The espresso was scrumptious and the view was much more spectacular. I used to be tucked right into a shady nook of an out of doors cafe on the base of the Monastery in Petra, Jordan. I had been sitting in my cozy purple sofa for lengthy sufficient when a wiry Bedouin man of about 30 lifted his wrinkled chin to me, squinted his darkish eyes, and shouted, “The place you from?”

“USA!” I responded. “You?” I believed I used to be being humorous.

“My mom!” he referred to as again. He was being even funnier.

I appreciated these guys instantly—they knew how you can take a joke, and so they knew how you can give it simply nearly as good.

“You wanna go up high?” Mohammad requested. I grinned.

Only a (Bedouin) man and his donkey

Simply 30 minutes earlier I had been watching as Mohammed yelled on the German vacationer. However when he supplied to take me to the highest, I didn’t communicate a phrase of it. In spite of everything, that is their turf, and so they can do as they please.

With lengthy strides, Mohammad bounded in the direction of the carved rock face of the Monastery and I adopted behind him. Once we arrived on the precise facet of it, the place there was nothing however a vertical rock wall, he scaled proper up it with out even breaking stride.

With Spiderman-like glue on his ft, he caught to the rock and leaned again down to increase his arm. I didn’t understand we’d be free-climbing 158 ft up a vertical cliff. I finished for a second, questioning whether or not or not this was actually such a good suggestion, and determined that if he might do it, I might, too.

I pretended to not see his outstretched arm and I pulled myself up behind him. Gasps echoed all through the group that had been watching on from the cafe.

I obtained this.

View of the Monastery from above

Remembering an article written by writer and pal, Bruce, entitled “Lease a Actual Man in Borneo,” I watched in amazement as Mohammad expertly scaled up the wall. He was one of many actual males that Northam talks about—the kind of man who lives within the desert, navigates the weather, and is aware of how you can climb partitions.

I fumbled my approach up, not practically as shortly as him, however with somewhat little bit of expertise beneath my belt I had a good sufficient concept of what I used to be doing. In spite of everything, I’ve been mountain climbing in New Zealand, free soloing in Thailand, and canyoning in Colombia.

About two-thirds of my approach up the rock face I reached an advanced set of holds. I stalled, not figuring out what I used to be presupposed to do subsequent. Right here I used to be, 100 ft within the air, with no seen approach up and only one doubtless approach down.

Shit.

The considered falling from a cliff, someplace deep within the coronary heart of the Center East, thundered by my mind. My coronary heart raced, and I drew an prolonged, dusty breath of air into my lungs. With out realizing what was occurring, Mohammad’s arms got here down from above, grabbed the shoulder straps of my backpack, and pulled me as much as his degree.

I regarded above me and, already, he was gone. He had scrambled the remainder of the best way to the highest and disappeared over the cliff’s edge.

He was like a spider-monkey, this one.

I, too, scrabbled the remainder of the best way to the highest, one foothold after the opposite, and as I pulled myself up over the ledge, the group under broke out in wild cheers. My legs trembled with nervousness and pleasure as I stood up straight and circled to look down over the ledge behind me. My coronary heart thudded inside my chest, sweat burned into my eyes, and I beamed.

“Over right here!” Mohammad referred to as. “You stand there. Take picture. I soar!”

Petra soar shot!

I watched on in amazement as he set himself up with a 20 foot operating begin and jumped 15 ft to the ledge under him. One slight misstep in his touchdown and he would discover himself tumbling over the sting, falling 158 ft to his loss of life.

However regardless of. He obtained this.

Mohammad stood on the sidelines, watching me act like an ecstatic youngster, operating across the round lid of the central urn which crowns the Monastery. He took a seat on the ledge and requested me to hitch. My abdomen muscle tissues tightened, and I lowered myself down subsequent to him, waving my ft on the vacationers under.

We sat for just a few moments, and he advised me tales of his brothers and the place he was from. He advised me secrets and techniques of Petra and the Monastery. He advised me concerning the time he spent the evening up right here with a woman.

After which he advised me that he’d see me down on the backside. And like that, he was gone.

A number of extra picture ops and I made a decision to not be the second vacationer to get taken away by a mustachioed man that day. I took to the closed-off stairs subsequent to the monument (the one embellished with the large ‘NO CLIMBING’ signal) and I descended.

Sitting on high of the Monastery

Whose Land is it Anyway?

My actions that day are controversial. Climbing the Monastery is forbidden, and lots of would possibly argue that I shouldn’t have accomplished it.

These folks could be proper, and as somebody who cares significantly about accountable tourism, I might be inclined to agree with them. However I provide two various arguments.

400,000 folks visited town of Petra final yr (which is definitely 50% lower than in 2010, as a result of conflicts in neighboring Iraq and Syria). If all 400,000 climbed to the highest of the Monastery, preservation efforts can be fruitless and Petra would fall into bodily decline. A number of climbers right here and there, nevertheless, make a lot much less of a distinction, particularly contemplating this monument was constructed to be climbed.

However erosion is an actual factor, and vacationers do have a approach of ruining issues.

View from the highest of the Monastery within the metropolis of Petra

Alternatively, my actions had been endorsed by the locals who’ve inhabited the land for hundreds of years. I didn’t take it upon myself to climb alone—I used to be introduced by an area, one who has climbed this monument a whole lot of occasions and one who rightfully claims this land as his personal.

I made associates with the Bedouins that day, and in return they determined to share with me one thing they treasure—a hidden gem of Petra—a view not typically skilled by exterior guests. It’s an expertise they hold near their coronary heart, solely sharing it with a few of those that select to honor their tradition and their land.

Was I disrespectful? To UNESCO, maybe. However this territory belongs to the Bedouins, and it’s our accountability to play by the principles of the locals once we are a customer in a brand new land.

Should you do that, and also you make a real effort to get to know and honor the locals, they may honor you again. And although they may not take you to the highest of the Monastery, perhaps they’ll share with you one other little hidden piece of their world.

On high of the Monastery within the metropolis of Petra

READ NEXT: Visiting The Pyramids of Giza: Is it Protected to Journey to Egypt?

Disclaimer: This journey to Petra was made doable by Vacationer Israel and Abraham Excursions who supplied me with this tour in change for different journalistic providers. Collaborations like this permit me to proceed bringing you the perfect content material I can, and so they by no means sacrifice the integrity of my phrases. Neither Vacationer Israel nor Abraham Excursions took half in, or condoned my climbing of the monument. This was accomplished in my spare time and with out the data or consent of the tour guides or organizers.

from Cheapr Travels https://ift.tt/2SYxRN6 via IFTTT

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