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qweerhet · 3 months

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i have come to realize over the past few days that a lot of bad transfeminist takes on this website are percolating in spaces where it's presumed the transfem experience is one of either attempting to be recognized as a woman socially, or wanting to be recognized as a woman socially but not attempting (with an unspoken "yet" attached), and suddenly everything coming out of those spaces about transmisogyny makes sense.

transmisogyny never applies to men because if you're a woman, you know it already. or if it does apply to men, it always benefits them, because someone who looks like a man and occupies the social role of man could never actually be a woman, at least until they start trying to occupy the social role of woman. if a woman is closeted, she'll come out eventually. people who don't chemically or surgically transition and continue to use he/him are selfishly benefiting from transmisogyny, and don't want to come out because they benefit too much from enacting violence on trans women. transfems are always treated as failed women, and never as failed men, because being transfem means trying to be recognized as a woman. nobody could ever see a real transfem as a man, only men are seen as men, and transfems do things like use she/her and wear women's clothes and go on estrogen, which means everyone knows they're transfem. transfems who are men aren't a part of this conversation. tma people who aren't women don't exist because transmisogyny comes from being perceived as a woman.

and it's like. well. i certainly know lots of people who would directly contest & cleanly disprove your presumptions here (i mean. myself being one of them, even though i do present femme full-time!), but you'll never get the chance to have your worldview shifted, because you've made your social spaces profoundly unfriendly to them!

even if you've already made an effort to decouple transmedicalism from your theory, you still have to make an effort to actually engage with & understand the material experiences of people who don't align with current narratives about transition at all. transfems who use all pronouns and grow massive beards while on e and never legally change their names or gender markers. transneutral and transandrogynous tma people. trans women who refer to themselves as women but do not want to chemically or surgically transition or publicly use pronouns other than he/him, ever. full-time female impersonators who solely use she/her and chemically and surgically transition, but still identify as men. and you have to really engage with what we say about transmisogyny, as in, listen in good faith and understand what we're expressing about its functions in our daily lives!

or you could circlejerk forever about how being a woman is the be-all-end-all of experiencing transmisogyny and personal identification is one and the same as material conditions of privilege, to the point that personal identification automatically prescribes material privilege. and shut out a solid chunk of tma people from your gender theory permanently and irrevocably. and implicitly call a solid chunk of tma people liars for talking about daily life experiences. that's cool too, definitely won't have any negative consequences for trans community and trans spaces in the broader world or anything.

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fairladyjenny · 13 days

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i think the responce to transmisandry/transandrophobia has been mostly reactionary in that trans people (in my experience, transmasc and transfem and nonbinary alike) refuse to interact with the whole premise partly due to the underlying problems of "misandry" as a whole and partly due to bad actors' assimilation of the topic, but it's definitely unfair and dishonest to throw all transmasculine experiences with discrimination under the blanket term "transphobia" while separately recognizing the issue of transmisogyny [in the specific misogyny-based transfeminine experiences with discrimination]

the common (and very valid) justification for not wanting to see misandry as a problem relies on the correct premise that cis men, by default, face almost no gendered discrimination, and as such it is counterproductive to discuss such discrimination in the same optic that you would use to describe misogyny; transmisogyny is the extension of the common variety misogyny in a way which is specific to transfeminine people, with how some form of violence [mostly] do not apply to trans women and how other forms of violence are applied disproportionately, or are unique to trans women. in this sense, there is a strong case to be made about the existence of gender-specific violence against trans men too: they [mostly] do not face some forms of gendered violence, and have other forms of gendered violence, again, applied to them disproportionately

since i'm russian one of the examples of such disproportionately applied violence would be the draft: trans men who changed their documents when that was still a thing that could happen can be drafted (since F64.0 is no longer a valid reason to avoid the draft), and, henceforth, have to face unique transphobic violence, that, i hope, needs no explanation. yes, trans women who haven't changed their documents can be drafted too, and cis men and cis women can be drafted also, but:

1. some experiences of transmisogyny can be shared between not only transfeminine people (which is why the whole TMA/TME doesn't really make sense, if you happen to live in a v. supportive environment even as a trans woman you could experience no transmisogyny in your life, and vice versa); some experiences of other forms of discrimination can happen outside the particular group they're specific to also; there's no reason why this wouldn't apply here

2. it's painfully obvious that trans men are going to have very different experiences with the draft than trans women or cis women or cis men.

though, one could argue that at this point you're just making up more and more convenient little boxes with names that sound catchy for the purpose of melting down everyone's unique experiences in a pot, and that this could be counter-productive with how many identities exist out there... but this kinda goes both ways and why not just call all prejudice and acted out discrimination against specific groups of people "chauvinism" and be done with it. having specific words for specific topics is nice

#transmisandry #transandrophobia #serious discussion/topic

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biracy · 9 months

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As a dyke i once joked that a fictional character who was male was experiencing comphet and someone told me off for using it because "its a lesbian only term" No the fuck it isnt... Really putting the L in lgbt... Also. Imo comphet can apply to anyone, even het people. Yes even cishet people. Its like a mosquito it gets Everyone

So true honestly like I think a reexaminining of heterosexuality as a social system and approaching "compulsory heterosexuality" theory through that lens would be a lot more productive than "comphet is when only lesbians feel pressure to date men, no one else can experience it". Like I said in my post, as a bisexual person I have an experience that falls explicitly outside of mainstream standards of heterosexuality, and I also feel social pressure to date "acceptable" heterosexual men in an "acceptable" heterosexual woman fashion (i.e. not be the freako that I am). I've also read about how straight trans people inherently cannot perform "heterosexuality" as a social system, which inherently excludes trans people. That's not to say that trans people cannot be straight, as in "attracted to/only interested in dating people of different genders (trans women who date men, trans men who date women)", but to say that all trans people cannot fit into heterosexuality as it is defined by patriarchy, religious hegemony, etc. I think too many people discuss "comphet" while operating under a definition of "heterosexuality" as "when a woman dates a man", which I think, when examined through both bisexual and transgender lenses, falls through. It disregards the existence of heterosexuality and heteronormativity as systems that can negatively affect and control everyone, especially all women, in favor of paying lipservice to what is essentially an "am I gay" quiz written like five years ago. I think the ways comphet affects lesbians, bi women, and straight women are all different, but I also think a multifaceted approach to comphet theory is important lol

#maybe this is the prison of heterosexuality. yknow #ask #anon #lgbt #comphet

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sailormoonandme · 11 months

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Long Rant Incoming!

I am honestly just exhausted with how the Sailor Moon fandom so often bashes the original anime, in particular when they do so by presuming bigotry of any kind on the part of the staff members.

Sure, show me a quote or an interview where they definitively say something and I will listen with an open mind.

But why does this fandom presume that, for example, AnimeRei’s interest in men was obviously changed from the MangaRei’s more negative attitude because of sexism?

Or that Usagi being naked in the last episode whilst Mamoru was in his Endymion armour was again rooted in sexism?

Or that old favourite that has now become oh so trendy again thanks to Cosmos, that the Starlights were physically male in the anime (as opposed to simply dressing as men and pretending to be men) because the anime staff were being homophobic. More specifically, that this change was implemented so that the UsagixSeiya relationship was ‘less gay’.

Let’s talk a bit about that shall we?

So....

The original 1992 Sailor Moon anime had two men explicitly in a relationship in season 1, Kunzite and Zoisite.

It had two women explicitly in a relationship in season 3, Haruka and Michiru.

It had a character in season 4 who, to my understanding (please correct me on this as I am not overly knowledgeable on the subject), was trans, Fisheye.

When you go beyond the explicit into merely very obvious subtext, Sailor Moon’s track record for LGBT representation gets even larger. The pair of female animators in episode 21. Fiore and Mamoru’s relationship in the R movie. The fashion designer and his assistant in episode 140. Sailor Lead Crow and Aluminium Siren’s relationship.

Not to mention the UsaRei ship:

Or the MakAmi ship:

It’d be weird for a show with this kind of track record (that was indeed a trailblazer in the context of the time) to suddenly got cold feet over another female-female relationship.

Now there are two counter arguments to this:

a) Most of the above doesn’t apply specifically to Sailor Moon herself, the UsaRei ship being subtextual for this very reason. In other words ‘its okay for side characters’

b) Sailor Stars was under new management. It is entirely possible said new management had very different attitudes towards female-female relationships

Let’s tackle a) first.

It’s okay to portray side characters in same sex relationships

First of all, Usagi was attracted to Haruka in episode 92. Even after she discovered Haruka was (in her eyes at least) a cis woman she still regarded her as attractive and desirable, usually blushing whenever Haruka flirted with her and being all too happy to dance with Haruka in episode 108.

Isn’t it a little weird to argue it would be bad for Usagi to be dating another woman when there wasn’t a world of difference between how Seiya in the manga and Haruka in the anime were framed and presented to the audience.

The main difference was that in the manga Seiya was explicitly pretending to be male and therefore would not have corrected anyone’s presumptions that she was a man, which is exactly what Haruka did at the end of episode 92 when Usagi and Minako discover Haruka is not a cis boy.

Whilst we might argue that the character of MangaSeiya would have presented herself differently had she not needed to disguise herself, from a narrative POV if the anime had stuck with Seiya being biologically female she would have had to maintain that disguise for the overwhelming majority of episodes anyway. In other words, she would have been presenting herself as a cis male the entire time outside of Sailor Senshi fights.

Second of all, the anime was still explicitly shipping Usagi and Seiya even after the big reveal in episode 188 where the Senshi and Starlights discover one another’s identities. In fact, episode 189 has Minako explicitly state that the Starlights are in fact girls:

Now, whilst Minako regards this as a dealbreaker for her own romantic affections for the Three Lights, Usagi is still obviously conflicted about her feelings for Seiya. This culminates in episode 194′s famous “Am I not enough?” scene and their conversation in episode 195 where Usagi lets Seiya down backstage and he kisses her goodbye on her cheek.

Before episode 194 the show was going hard on this ‘star-crossed lovers’ imagery and ideas, with the Starlights and Outer Senshi trying to pull the pair apar. Seiya even communicated to Usagi at night whilst she is in her bedroom , which imo is deliberately evoking Romeo and Juliet. Moreover, the animation frankly framing the pair in a romantic light, with plenty of blushes and soft lighting liberally appearing all over the place.

Sure, on screen you have a biological woman and biological man. But the show has explicitly stated that that Seiya is not a man, or at least from Usagi’s POV that isn’t the case.

Now one could argue that this is nevertheless reductive. After all, you still have a female role assigned and a male role assigned in the relationship. But again...how different is this really from Haruka and Michiru who are present and as explicitly romantic as ever in Sailor Stars?

In terms of ‘presenting’ as male or female Haruka and Seiya are in the same boat 99% of the time (the 1% is for episodes involving bathing outfits or other forms of partial nudity). Most of the time Haruka visually presents as (for its day) typically masculine until she assumes her Senshi form where she presents as more typically (again, for its day) female. The only difference between the two characters is that the viewer intellectually knows that Seiya has a penis that becomes a vagina whereas Haruka always has a vagina. But since in both cases we never see those particular pieces of anatomy it is a moot point.

So the argument that ‘on screen’ Usagi is not being shipped with a woman is irrelevant. To all practical purposes, from a purely visual POV she might as well have been shipped with someone just like Haruka. It didn’t make it ‘more acceptable’ at all. In particular when you consider the show heavily implies that Seiya’s male body was nothing more than a guise assumed on Earth for the sake of their mission. So, had anyone been extrapolating forwards Usagi and Seiya potentially forming a long term relationship, Usagi would have been in a relationship with someone who was biologically female anyway.

Third of all, the ‘side character’ argument falls apart when you consider HOW popular Uranus and Neptune were. In Animage’s 1995 poll episode 110 "Death of Uranus and Neptune!? Talismans Appear" was voted the most popular episode. A major reason why SuperS was so unpopular was because the Outer’s were absent, which is why the very first episode of Sailor Stars practically revolves around them. Hell, exempting Usagi, of all the Solar System Sailor Senshi, Uranus and Neptune are the last ones standing, dying in the third to last episode of the entire show.

This isn’t even mentioning HOW prominent they were in season 3. Like, sure, they weren’t the MAIN characters, but until Hotaru shows up, they were by far and away the most important characters in the show just behind Usagi. Sailor Moon S as a whole is ostensibly one great big ideological debate between Usagi’s idealistic philosophy and Haruka and Michiru’s more hardline realistic philosophy.

To codify them as ‘side characters’ in the context of season 3 is akin to describing Mamoru or Chibi-Usa as side characters in the manga. That is to say, the difference between them and Usagi is a matter of mere degrees. Are we in all seriousness arguing that those degrees make the difference between how okay it is to present characters as part of female-female relationships? That’s rather ridiculous isn’t it?

Let’s move on to point b).

The new management didn’t like same-sex relationships

Yes. It is entirely possible that the new management had very different attitudes towards female-female relationships than the people in charge of the prior four seasons of the show. Thus the representation present in the prior four seasons doesn’t excuse season 5 of being homophobic in its decision to make the Starlights biologically male.

You know what else is entirely possible? That there were any number of other reasons for that decision apart from homophobia.

Again, I’m willing to listen with an open mind to anyone that has a statement or an interview or something like that from production staff members that might support the above interpretation. But in over ten years of being a Sailor Moon fan I have yet to see anything that implies this rather damning motivation on the part of the production staff. At which point why is anyone at all just presuming the worst faith interpretation?

Here are some good faith interpretations for why the Starlights were biologically male:

- Making them biologically male could raise a bit of intrigue on the part of the viewers. Even if they figured magic was the reason how they could change from male to female, they’d still be enticed to watch to see the process in action. Which would be even more intriguing compared to four seasons of transformation sequences where girls simply put on new Senshi outfits.

- Making them male made it easier for writers to generate the show’s all important filler episodes and opened up more storytelling opportunities.

If the Starlights are biologically female it would mean either scrapping episodes or scenes where the Starlights are involved in partial nudity. Case in point, episode 178 where Luna is revealed to have taken a bath with Yaten, episode 183 where the gang vacation at a lake and are in their bathing suits, episode 184 where the gang see Seiya getting out of the shower, or even episode 176 where the Starlights are in dance outfits which naturally are tight fitting and therefore do not leave much to the imagination.

Perhaps these instances could have still happened with the Starlights as biological females, but it would have been trickier and required a lot more strategic thinking on the part of the overworked writers who were on a deadline. Making them male frankly just made their lives easier

- The anime staff might have simply believed that the idea of three women disguising themselves as men and maintaining such a secret amidst becoming super star idols, attending high school, etc was simply unconvincing, too big of a suspension of disbelief.

- Making them biologically male might have been a ‘creative flex’. What do I mean by this? Simply put it is not at all uncommon for people adapting a piece of media to throw something in of their own invention.

This might happen out of boredom on the part of the people adapting the source material (it can potentially be dull merely replicating something) or it could occur due to ego (see the majority of modern MCU films and TV shows that change no end of things from the comic books).

Ego, unfortunately is all too common amongst creative people, especially those who have made it professionally into the entertainment industry. There is a desire by many to put their stamp on a work, even if it is not a work of their own creation per se.

This may well be the root of several other changes between the manga and the anime too, regardless of whether those changes have anything to do with gender, sexuality, female representation of other such issues.

- Making them biologically males who transform into biological females, in the eyes of the production staff, might have been more avant garde and progressive towards the LGBT community as it rendered the characters as arguably trans or gender fluid characters.

- And finally...it may well have just been a mistake. The manga and anime were produced simultaneously but also at very different paces, the manga releasing monthly vs the anime’s weekly schedule.

Between Takeuchi’s busy production schedule, not to mention however else she was involved in the (by then massive) Sailor Moon brand, it is entirely possible that she either hadn’t decided upon, or simply miscommunicated her ideas for the Starlights, thus resulting in the anime staff misunderstanding her intentions or extrapolating them to be biological men in their civilian forms.

Indeed, Takeuchi herself misunderstood the Starlights in the anime as she apparently missed the dialogue that implied they were biological females who used magic to become biological males for their mission on Earth. She instead got upset that they were men who were Sailor Senshi.

Now, I came up with the above off the top of my head and don’t have any hard evidence in support of any of it. Which means they all carry just as much weight as the ‘obviously it was bigotry’ interpretation.

And, once again, I have to bring up the fact that Sailor Stars features Uranus and Neptune in a relationship and arguably even ramps up their flirtations compared to season 3. So, kinda weird that they’d include one female-female relationship in season 5 but would be apprehensive over another one.

In conclusion

Can we as a fandom please just fucking STOP automatically presuming the worst of the original anime and its production staff?

Seriously, its really, really, really, really WEIRD!

More than weird though, it is simply unfair.

It is unjust.

It is hateful, even.

Which is particularly ironic since this is a franchise literally built around a character who stands for...well...you know...

#Sailor Moon #Sailor Stars #seiya kou #kou seiya #sailor star fighter #sailor starfighter #Sailor Star-Fighter #SeiUsa #usagi tsukino #tsukino usagi #naoko takeuchi #sailor starlights #HARUKA TENOH #TENOH HARUKA #Sailor Uranus #sailor neptune #Michiru Kaioh #Harumichi #kaioh michiru

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jasontoddssuper · 6 months

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Okay so speaking as a long time fanfic author and aspiring books author,Percy works best as a trans girl from a writing standpoint and not just because she'd be extremely good rep.Percy being a cis guy who's stereotypically masculine is forced characterization because she has no reason to want to be one-She had no positive male role models growing up.There were definitely male teachers who were mean-spirited to her as much as female ones,Poseidon abandoned her and even after they met he prioritized her or at least treated her like a father who genuinely loves his daughter out of just her being his child instead obligation a grand total of zero times,Smelly Gabe is self-explanatory and Luke abused her too right from the start by gaslighting her.All she had was Sally so it's realistic that Percy would think women are better than men and not give a shit about being manly and preferring femininity

It's semi-canon that Percy has a trauma based dislike of men if we're looking at subtext-In the og series,she speaks much more positively of the girls around than she does the boys and she actually trash talks the latter while using being hypermasculinity as an insult,such as implying Ares is ugly multiple times.And one of the three male friends she has vs being friends with almost every girl in her age range?Nico,Pjo's first canon mlm.This just absolutely screams 'baby gays spotting eachother without either knowing they're not cishet yet' and it's only added on to by how devoted they are to eachother despite the problems in their relathionship.Plus,just sayin',but the explicit reason Nico got over his crush on Percy is that she wasn't a traditional male hero like he thought she was

On similar note,Rachel is a lot like many irl lesbians and her and Percy remain besties after their break up and the first point applies to Reyna too,who liked Percy and likewise after taking away the posibility of romance to their dynamic,they remained great friends and it's a common tgirl experience to still be close to all your ex girlfriends in a platonic way post-egg cracking.Percy reminds me so much of so many of my trans woman friends in tons of ways and i've seen others say the same and back to my first point,the logical conclusion to Percy hating having to be a man who's super masculine is to make her a woman who's super feminine so she can be happy so this all comes full circle

And onto specifics for the Pjo storylines and developments,Percy gains even more depth if she's a trans woman.A self admitted former 'troubled kid' who just wants to be normal but is always getting shoved into a role she dosen't want by people who think they know better than her despite barely knowing her,Luke's fixation on targeting younger girls can be told as a feminist tale by having her the hero of the prophecy instead of him and also be the one to kill him to avenge her female friends and you cannot tell me that the idea of the protagonist of one of the best children's books series out there being a trans girl who's got bad social skills,anger issues and merciless tendencies but never gets demonized for them,is the funniest person in the whole franchise,hyperfemme too and the fucking daughter of Poseidon isn't based as all fuck

She would also help Annabeth's character development by teaching her to not be a pick me anymore and Annabeth would thank her by teaching her to be more self-confident,Nico and her would've become found siblings and Nico and eventually Hazel could've even been adopted by Sally because of it,her transfemininity would've changed the angles of her dynamics with the gods to make them make more interesting,we could dive into how Pjoverse greco-roman mythos play into transgenderism and other types of queerness,Percy's already canon present Team Mom habits and hinted love for cute and 'kiddy' things would be used to their full potential like they deserve,it opens to door to an even more interesting potential romantic dynamic with Jason and there's definitely way more

I'm not sure how to end this so i will make a /hj:Percy Jackson is a female protagonist of all time

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metanarrates · 3 months

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i have a lot of mixed feelings regarding trans headcanons in orv, or in general in fandom spaces because of how often its taking transmisogynistic jokes and bending them to actually have a cool and awesome meaning instead of just reading fiction with transgender characters. how do you feel about this as an everyone in orv is transfem poster (not accusatory tone i am genuinely wondering your take on this)

I think it's complicated because i Do agree that most trans headcanons in fandom are rooted in transphobic ideas, especially when it comes to transfem characters. I actually personally wouldn't trust most people who headcanon characters as trans unless they're able to point out when something in the text is transmisogynistic. and orv does have transmisogynistic stuff in it. the whole joke with nirvana and the entire scene with the pink kids is based around transfems being predators and men in disguise. I really don't want to hang around other orv fans unless they're able to point that out. (also, i would Definitely not trust anyone who refers to those characters as trans icons or whatever.)

I'll also fully admit that I don't remember the revolutionary arc all that well. at the time when I first read it, I just simply assumed that jang hayoung was meant to be a trans woman, and any issues kim dokja had with recognizing her gender was interesting because of how it tied into the metafictional elements about how characters can change beyond a reader's perception. from my recollection, and from the readings of other people in my life who have read the novel, it seemed canon that she was intentionally transfem. similarly, I felt like the plot point of "yoo joonghyuk has a female alter ego" was taken pretty seriously, rather than being a meanspirited joke. if I'm not remembering that right, though, please let me know.

orv in general has a problem in depictions of lgbt people. there's the abovementioned transmisogyny with nirvana and the pink kids, and there's also the undeniable fact that "kim dokja and yoo joonghyuk are gay but haha Not Actually" is leaned on a little bit too much as a joke. I have a similarly complicated relationship to the idea of shipping them for that reason - I think their relationship is meaningful and rich, but I really dislike that the fandom seems to just take that joke as an uncritical BL trope, rather than discussing how it's sometimes a bit homophobic. again, I don't trust joongdok shippers who aren't able to discuss this.

at the same time, though, I do think that if you're aware of the problems in the text, it's possible to construct a lot of rich meaning out of applying queer lenses to the text. there's a lot to dig into regarding how the story depicts gender, for example, and how it depicts transcendence and self-actualization. you can't credit the authors here - like I said, their writing has several issues with lgbt people. but as long as you aren't advertising the story as Queer Fiction, I find that it's extremely valuable to discuss how a trans reading might cast an interesting light onto a character. and on a more personal level, I think having these sorts of open discussions about both the problems and merits of trans readings, as well as the issues present in a text, do tend to make a lot of trans people feel more welcome in fan spaces. both are necessary for making a story and space that may be hostile towards them feel more welcoming.

yes, I do agree that it would probably be better to read fiction with better trans characters. those stories are out there! this is also why I am wary to praise singshong for jang hayoung's character - I don't think orv exactly Deserves a reputation as a trans inclusive story, especially when there's a lot more of those that are much better at it out there.

but at the end of the day, there are going to be trans people who do like orv, all the same. I'm one of them, though I will say upfront that I am tme and therefore much less affected by the story's problems. my fiancee is transfem and she likes it. a lot of my mutuals who like orv are trans. I don't think it's such a bad thing that we've constructed these community readings in a work we already liked for its other merits. we're going to be here anyway. as long as we do our best to be respectful and point out problems as they arise, I think it's a good thing that we're having these sorts of discussions.

#narrates #orv #transphobia discussion #transmisogyny discussion #tldr; yeah this is a necessary discussion to have and its why I try to be careful about how i discuss this as well as who i associate with

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soup-mother · 2 months

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thoughts on the phrase “you guys” as an australian? i’m a trans guy, before transitioning i and my cis girl friends in aus definitely called eachother “guys” in this context growing up. things like “dude” do seem very gendered but since i remember “you guys” being applied to groups of only girls or women (not just mixed gender groups or groups of men) throughout my life it doesn’t seem that way to me. of course i do avoid calling trans women that anyway since being made aware online that it can upset, just wanted your perspective

I'm Australian too lol, so i have a lot of thoughts on a lot of phrases and have been misgendered with most of them lol.

anyway obviously the reason "guys" etc gets used for women is because masculine terms are seen as neutral and friendly, especially in a very male centric society like Australia. wheras "girls" for men is demeaning and rude and implying they're less than men (as opposed to like..more than women). it's very ingrained into a lot of people cus like...we live in a patriarchy unfortunately, and it's less egregious that like "you boys" etc but still ultimately just a masculine term being used for everyone because masculine = good.

ppl act like "mate" is gender neutral which is insane to me because I've only ever had it used by men to other men (or by men misgendering me) or by women to men. not "my mates" cus that's a different meaning but "how are you going mate?" definitely has very male centric connotations regardless of some hypothetical "original" meaning, words don't exist in a vacuum obviously.

ultimately just like.... there's other words? why use "guys" when you can just use folk or people or peeps or something funnier? like we can agree we don't need titles like "mr" "ms" and we can agree calling hypothetical or unknown ppl "they" is the way to go and those older terms are SO obviously coming from patriarchy and it drives me nuts seeing ppl act like "neutral" masculine terms aren't just another facet of patriarchy affecting language.

#asks #anon

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kittencomicslol · 4 months

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Gyutaro x reader requests :3

Requests are; Open!!

Hello hello hello!!! If u know me, u know I love Gyutaro (a concerning amount but hey we all have our struggles)

I most likely will not do full entire fanfictions but rather little headcannons/senarios. I’ve done these on my wattpad so for reference this is what I mean by that (no need to actually read this it’s just to show how i do my shit lol) but if you request something and I REALLLYY like the idea or if I’m pumped full of motivation, I might do a full one.

Edit; okay!! What the fart! The link won’t work ig no reference for yall

Here are some guidelines for what I will/wont write, and then under that I’ll set up a little master-List ^_^

Also sen I know you frequent tumblr and the ds tag aswell so helloo! Hello hello!! Ily!! :3

_______

What I will definitely write!! (If it’s not on here I can try, but this is stuff I definitely will do!!)

-Fluff, I love love LOVE toothrotting fluff

-Angst, depending on how mentally stable I currently am when writing

-Hurt comfort LOVE LOVE LOVEEEE hurt comfort

-Reader w disabilities

-Phobias

-Disorders

-Readers who have gone through past grooming/abuse (I feel u yall ❤️)

-Gore (it’s demon slayer like cmon it’s gonna happen at some point when it comes to something)

-Cannibalism (same sitch as gore, demons n stuff bro)

-Human reader

-Demon reader

-Yokai reader

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What I won’t/can’t do

-NSFW!! I am a minor :3 (ofc I can leave jokes or mentions of shit but I’m not gonna actually post nsfw as a minor)

-M! reader (sorry I just gen suck w it and I’m mostly writing these 4 me, I’m sorry 💔 this does not apply to mtf trans topics!! ❤️)

-Depictions of something unhealthy (grooming, gaslighting, abuse, manipulation, pedophilla, not cool stuff!! I can write this in hurt comfort/taking about trauma but I will NEVER make it something to actually do w the relationship)

-Yandere stuff (though I love this as a horror idea, a lot of ppl actually enjoy romanticizing yandere stuff which classifies as romanticizing abuse. That is totally not cool!! I hate writing that stuff bc it normalizes those topics to younger ppl reading which is dangerous!)

-Incell shit. I’ve seen too many ppl on here go ‘oh Gyutaro is an incell’ ‘I fought the incell accusations and lost’ well I DIDNT. I don’t care about the plot at all, Gyutaro literally RAISED A GIRL. IN THE RED LIGHT DISTRICT. He literally taught her to defend herself against creepy men!! Like cmon guys use critical thinking and common sense pls 😭😭

_______

I do not know how frequently I will be able to post/write. My life is literally in limbo rn and I am prioritizing myself‼️‼️

If you wanna ask just send it in as a question for my blog, I can work w it that way. Idk if that’s how ppl usually do it or not I’m new to tumblr but fuck it we ball 🔥🔥

And I am posting this 10 minutes before new years, let’s kick 2024 off with scribbles about our favorite demon boy!! <3

_______

Masterlist!! (Hc / fanfiction

!Human Gyu with an !upper moon reader

Random self indulgent fluff fanfiction

How Gyutaro would like to cuddle

Comforting him with snuggles n praise

#gyutaro #gyutaro demon slayer #gyutaro x reader #gyutaro x you #fanficton #x reader #demonslayer #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kny x reader #kny #demon slayer x reader #kimetsu no yabia x reader #gyutaro shabana #male wife #oh my god I’m litteraly in LOVE with this man

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tethered-heartstrings · 2 years

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This fandom has an inherent issue in how it treats Will Graham, and there are a lot of factors.

I see a lot of fics, fanart, and posts that make Will a twink. He is not a twink by definition. A twink is a thin, hairless, gay man. Will has muscle, is toned, and has facial and body hair. On that same note, Hannibal is not a bear. Stop misunderstanding gay community terms and applying them to fictional characters for your own mlm fetishization and fantasies. Gay/queer men don’t need to fit specific labels. They don’t need to be defined by those outside their community to be valued or understood or taken seriously. Real gay/queer men can use those to identify themselves and their interests, but they are real people. Will and Hannibal are fictional characters that do not fit those labels, and they don’t need to.

I think the reason people make him a twink is to feminize him because they see femininity as weak. This brings me to another point on people always writing Will as a sub and a bottom. Too many people sexualize mlm relationships. They see it as purely sexual, and don’t understand the community and intimacy and history behind mlm love and relationships. People conflate someone being a sub as being a bottom and someone being a dom as being a top, and that is not necessarily true. Regardless, people often make Will both a sub and a bottom to weaken him and use it as an excuse for Hannibal to sexually abuse him. There is nothing sexy about a writer not understanding BDSM dynamic and writing an abuse fantasy. And there is nothing sexy about abuse. Period. Many writers and fans do so simply to cause Will harm. Another aspect of this is writing sex scenes that don’t use lube or even depict safe, sane sex (a CORE of BDSM). Lube isn’t optional, nor is it realistic that Hannibal and Will would forgo it. Spit, blood, etc (not even the bulbourethral gland secretions; learn some anatomy!) is not a good replacement for lube! All you are doing is writing painful sex. And being a bottom isn’t weak. Taking a dick in the ass isn’t weak. Putting a dick in the ass as a top also isn’t strong. It is nothing more than a sexual dynamic between two CONSENTING adults.

Writing Will in this way is also often infantilizing. It’s ableist as fuck to write him as unable to take care of himself, being too weak and needing Hannibal to do everything for him. Will is a grown man who has lived alone, has fed and clothed himself, feeds his dog, maintains a house and a car and a job, and does his own repairs. He isn’t useless.

Another issue I have is often seeing nontrans writers writing Will as a transman, only to essentially treat him female. It’s like they wanted brownie points for inclusivity. Writing Will as ftm only to treat him as weak, inferior, and inherently a bottom/sub is transphobic and misogynistic. Will as a trans man is a man! End of conversation. And even if you gender swapped him to be female, he would not be instantly lesser than Hannibal.

It all comes back to people wanting Will to be this useless, feminine, weak, inferior, and honestly abused character alongside Hannibal. If you believe that, you didn’t watch the show. Hannibal sees Will as his fucking equal if not elevated to the status of a god he worships. In what world would he physically or sexually abuse him? In what world is a man who beat someone to death, has killed, and will kill again a weak little man? Stop fetishizing mlm, stop weakening one side of a queer relationship to fit your cisheteronormative idea of queer intimacy. It is inaccurate and disgusting and you are simply just wrong.

#will graham #hannibal lecter #hannibal #hannibal nbc #nbc hannibal #hannibal fic #hannibal fanfiction #the speaking clown #angry anons will be ignored <3

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spacelazarwolf · 9 months

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Hi I don't know if you do advice posts but I'm really hitting it off with this guy who has sorta run in adjacent social circles but who i didn't really get to know personally until the past month or so. He recently disclosed to me that he's trans and while it isn't a deal breaker by any means the truth is I've never dated nor slept with a trans guy and I'm not sure whether I should mention that to him if we decide to pursue something so that he knows not to expect too much in terms of skill or not to so that he doesn't get the wrong impression and think I'm using him for an experiment. I'm either a gnc cis woman or some flavor of nonbinary but I'm not sure yet and I'm attracted to men

so imo, the best course of action would be to not disclose. i think you'll both feel more comfortable if you just let the relationship progress organically. if he asks and you're comfortable sharing, i think you can definitely tell him and also include that you don't want him to feel like an experiment. that should open the door for some good conversations about boundaries, likes and dislikes, what terminology he prefers, if he has had a form of bottom surgery, etc. basically, just let him take the lead on that. those conversations can start to feel a little clinical, so feel free to make them spicy. it's more fun that way.

this isn't necessarily what you asked about, but my adhd brain is taking me there, so here's my nsfw advice for folks who want to have sex with a trans person for the first time and are nervous about what to do. ymmv, and of course other trans folks are welcome to contribute. this can also apply to a lot of intersex folks as well, but i'm not gonna speak on that part since i'm not intersex, so intersex folks definitely feel welcome to add to this as well.

he's pre or no op and you're not sure what to call his junk and you don't want to just come out and ask? get a sexy conversation going and ask what he wants you to do to him. he'll describe his body with the terminology he prefers, and you can pick it up from there.

not sure if she's comfortable with you going near her genitals? "tell me where you want me to touch you" "where do you want me to put my mouth?" this is another great way to find out what someone calls parts of their body.

nervous about how to interact with his bottom growth? "i want to watch you touch yourself." "show me how you want me to touch you." watch what he does and copy that when you take over.

not sure if they're a top or a bottom or a side? start with what you prefer (or if you have boundaries about what roles you're not comfortable taking on), and let them respond to that. you don't like bottoming? good, she hates topping! you don't really like penetrative sex on either side? great, they can do oral for hours! haven't topped before but you're willing to try? perfect, he's a power bottom! and if you find your preferences aren't compatible, you can either see if there's other things they're willing to try, or go your separate ways amicably. this sometimes happens with queer sex and it's no one's fault!

he's had phallo and you're not sure how it works? treat it like you would any other dick! if there are things you need to or that he wants you do to differently, he'll tell you. same with meta, it's just a dick that's on the smaller end of average. refer back to "show me how you want me to touch you" if you're still nervous about it.

think they might be getting dysphoric? focus on parts of their body you know they like or that give them good gender feelings. run your hands over his biceps and talk about how sexy his muscles are. run your fingers through her hair and talk about how soft it is. if they seem to be spiraling, turn the attention to you to get them out of their head.

have to stop having sex because the dysphoria got too bad? keep it casual. if they want to talk about it, let them. if they want to let it go, find another activity you can do that feels intimate without the sexual contact. when they seem better, tell them "i'm really glad you were able to tell me earlier that you were feeling uncomfortable. it means a lot that you trust me enough to tell me that." if they seem open to it, have a conversation about what you can do if that happens in the future.

not as sexy, but still very important: if you have a uterus and can get pregnant and your partner has a penis that produces sperm, or vice versa, use a reliable form of birth control! it can suck to talk about that stuff, but it's incredibly important. additionally, use protection against sexually transmitted diseases and infections! get tested regularly, be open and honest with your partner(s), and always pee after sex.

have fun! have weird sex! have vanilla sex! try out some new kinks! celebrate the endless possibilities!

#ask avishai

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gabessquishytum · 9 months

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Hello, I’m the damsel fantasy anon, I love the no sex-ed virgin dream au, particularly the pregnancy stuff, thought I’d turn it around with Hob instead being the one to get knocked up: Hob’s pretty careful with his birth control and making sure Dream wears condoms, but he decides to ask Dream one night if he’s comfortable forgoing the condom, just this once, he wants to feel Dream cum inside him, and it turns out the stars aligned that night for his birth control to fail.

Dream knows in theory that condoms were for preventing pregnancy, because Hob explained all this to him one of the few times he taught Dream about sex through discussion instead of a hands-on demonstration, but Hob was accidentally a little vague about how it applied to him, so Dream thought the two of them only used condoms for std prevention or for the nebulous “safe sex” or something. He genuinely didn’t think he could get Hob pregnant despite Hob having a pussy, because they’re still both men (learning this reasoning later, Hob has no choice but to kiss him senseless)

So when Hob starts experiencing morning sickness and other symptoms, pregnancy is the last thing on Dream’s mind as he fusses over his sick boyfriend, and he straight up bluescreens when Hob sheepishly shows him a positive pregnancy test. When he reboots (and understands that this is in fact a thing (and after Hob kisses the shit out of him)) Dream is GLUED to Hob’s side, dedicating himself to waiting on him hand and foot, constantly staring at Hob’s growing belly with awe and wonder. Feeling the baby kick is a religious experience, that’s an entire baby in there! Dream and Hob’s baby! Dream manage to put a baby in Hob!

(The pregnancy sex is a whole other revelation, seeing Hob’s changing body day-by-day, the constant reminder that Dream managed to knock him up, oh hello breeding kink nice to meet you)

(If no one minds, is 🪽anon free to take?)

Dream being trans ally icon of the year while also being the most adorably clueless bastard ever? I love it, I'm kissing it. You are so welcome to be 🪽 anon!

Imagine how nervous poor Hob would be! He's not 100% sure that Dream wants to be with him longterm, and with a baby in the middle it's all about to get so complicated. Plus Hob doesn't really have a big family to support him. But he decides to keep the kid either way, and just hope that Dream is on board too.

First Dream is like "How? You're a boy?" And Hob cries a bit and kisses him and tries to explain as much as he can that he still has all the equipment for making a baby. That they have, in fact, made a baby. That he really really wants Dream to come to the first midwife appointment because he wants them to do this together.

And for Dream it's not even a question! There's nothing that's going to stop him from staying by Hob’s side. They're boyfriends, right? They'll get through the pregnancy together and when the baby comes they'll make it all work out, somehow. He kisses Hob’s belly (which Hob thought was so cringy when he saw other people do it but now he just melts).

On Hob’s masculine frame, his belly starts to pop rather quickly. Within a few short weeks his t-shirts are riding up and he has to slink off to the shops and buy a size up. Dream is unashamedly obsessed with the bump and if Hob isn't touching it (He gets this cute habit of resting his hand on his belly) then Dream is instead. Hob dresses in dungarees and big t-shirts, but also leggings and crop tops, because the summer heat is really starting to get to him. Dream buys him the most expensive frappes that he's craving all the time now, and makes him ice packs and gives him ankle rubs.

He also just goes ahead and buys an anatomy book. It's probably time that he should learn about his own body (and Hob’s) before any further happy accidents occur. And Hob definitely still seems interested in Dream’s dick despite all the trouble it's caused! His favourite thing is lying on his side while Dream fucks him from behind, hands cupped around Hob’s belly to keep him from slipping into an uncomfortable position. He can even fall asleep with Dream rocking into him, and claims that its the only time he feels comfortable.

The day when Dream refers to himself as "daddy" for the first time is also the day when Hob's cunt finally leaks through his underwear. Its kind of mortifying for him to explain to Dream that no, his water didn't break, he's just really that horny.

#🪽 anon #the sandman #dreamling #nsft #cw pregnancy #trans hob

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olderthannetfic · 8 months

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Kimberlé Crenshaw, who invented the concept of intersectionality largely to discuss the specific experiences of black women, would have nooooooo patience for the suggestion that black men don’t still benefit from male privilege in their own ways, lol. I think a lot of people in your anons need to understand the difference between suggesting that cis het white women don’t overall have it better on most metrics than black or trans or gay men, and pointing out that even marginalized men still benefit in *some* way from male privilege, and even very privileged women still experience misogyny. You’re not measuring them against each other by doing that; reduction of this discussion to a mathematics game of “who is the most/least oppressed” shows the person doing that, in fact, has not understood the point of intersectionality and therefore needs to stop smugly throwing that word at people who just give the definition of male privilege. What illustrates the point of “male privilege still benefits marginalized men, misogyny still hurts privileged women” is not comparing them against each other, but against people of similar levels of overall privilege/marginalization who are the other binary gender. Black men still generally benefit in some ways from being male in ways that black women don’t — if you need details on what that is, actually READ black feminists like Crenshaw and Lorde and hooks rather than just appropriate their arguments that you don’t understand, and lol, most black feminists would have WORDS for this bizarre idea that their femaleness somehow shields them from police and other institutional violence, and the numerous cases of black women being murdered by police put hard evidence to their critiques, too (the “innocence” granted to femaleness in white women just does not apply to black women in a white supremacist society) — and likewise, wealthy cishet white women still experience misogyny that wealthy cishet white MEN do not. (For evidence of that, just see… any cishet white female celebrity who has had any negative media attention ever.) I really don’t understand how people can do this same calculus with other forms of oppression — relatively privileged white cis gay men like Pete Buttigieg still experience homophobia, this is extremely obvious when comparing them with similarly-privileged straight people; and a poor person of color who is cis and straight still benefits from being cis and straight and their life would very likely be even worse if they were not cis or not straight, and cis and straight people in poor communities of color often perpetuate homophobia/transphobia to non-cis/straight people just like cis and straight people do in any other community — and yet not recognize that gender privilege vs. oppression works similarly. And there’s no excuse for men just deciding that’s not a conversation they want to have: not because it’s bad for cis het white women when they refuse to do that, but because it’s bad for women in their own communities who are similar levels of overall social privilege and marginalization to them. It does black WOMEN a disservice when black men decide that that’s something they can just opt out of entirely because they don’t like the way some white women have historically talked about it. And in general, white people and black men need to stop appropriating black women’s writing about feminism and racism without actually engaging with what they actually wrote, ESPECIALLY when it’s in service of ideas that those black women would very much not agree with at all.

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the-delta-quadrant · 7 months

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idk if anyone remembers this, but there was a time 6+ years ago where people very outright claimed that all trans people afab are transmasculine and all trans people amab are transfeminine. you can still find this on old social media or old info material about trans people.

the idea behind this was that while all trans people amab are transfeminine, only some are trans women and transfeminine is mainly used by people wanting to escape the gender binary. the same thing applies to transmasculinity. they used these terms to describe the direction of someone's medical transition without naming a binary gender. except this approach was still binary.

they thought they were being inclusive by saying "well, if you're not a man/woman, then you have to be at least masculine/feminine".

one of the first info materials i found in a trans group in 2017 used these definitions and it felt utterly uncomfortable. while i did consider myself vaguely masc for a hot second after coming out, the term transmasculine never felt right. but i saw this document as a baby trans, calling everyone like me transmasculine and then going on to talk about how transmasculinity means that you take testosterone and/or have surgery without being a trans man.

there was no space for people who went on T/took surgery and didn't identify as transmasculine. there was no space for transmasculine people who didn't want to medically transition. there was no space for nonbinary people who were neither transmasculine nor wanted to medically transition.

and while people don't say stuff like "all trans people amab are transfeminine" or "trans femininity means medically transitioning in this way", that's still how these terms are used

all.

the.

time.

like, cool. you changed the wording a bit. but the sentiment is still there.

i still see people talk about transfems only in posts about vaginoplasty. i still see people talk about transmascs only when discussing testosterone. i still see people say transfems for things that pretty much affect all trans people amab and more. i still see people say transmascs for oppression that pretty much affects all trans people afab and more. (newsflash: misgendering people/expecting people to misgender themselves in order to be allowed to speak about a kind of oppression they share with trans men and transmascs is oppression in and of itself, but i give in and stay out of that horrendous exorsexist discourse.)

the terms transmasculine and transfeminine barely existed before 2010 and queer as cat already made a video about those terms and their messed up use TEN years ago. and i gotta say, not much has changed.

it looks like 2013/14 is when these terms really picked up, which is when truscum were extra loud and it also seems to be when nonbinary people gained more visibility.

but those terms clearly weren't all that inclusive even by 2013 standards if there have already been nonbinary people pointing out the weird ways in which they were used.

the origin of these terms is really dodgy, based on truscum ideas about medical transition and putting nonbinary people in boxes that are adjacent to men and women, but they're not men and women so we can't complain, right? the origin of these terms is basically what truscums are saying all the time: "we only accept nonbinary people if they experience body dysphoria/transition medically/are masculine/feminine enough".

i'm happy to see that the definitions of transmasculine and transfeminine have changed, or moreso that there isn't a clear definition of either anymore. i'm happy to see transmascs and transfems be transmasc and transfem in nonconforming ways.

but i also wish that more people were aware of these origins and wouldn't basically continue using the terms that way without thinking about it for 2 seconds.

transmasc and transfem are useful labels to many people which is a good thing, but there are simply too many people portraying them as the only two options (which lines up with the idea that all trans people afab are transmasc and vice versa). i've recently literally seen a blog that said they were "transmasc safe, transfem safe and intersex safe". absolutely wild. there are also too many people equating transition steps with being transmasc or transfem. newsflash, not everyone who goes on oestrogen is transfem and not everyone who binds their chest is transmasc.

the way these terms are used barely changed in the last 10 years, it's still as fucked up now as it was back then.

transmasc and transfem could be (and already are for many people) incredibly powerful self-descriptors if they weren't constantly used to misgender and binarise nonbinary people and transition steps.

transmasc and transfem aren't coherent categories of experience, there are many people with the same experiences who don't identify as either. continuing to use them as collective terms rather than personal identifiers does nothing but erase, misgender and silence nonbinary people who are neither.

#lgbt #mogai #queer #lgbtq+#gsrm #lgbt+#nonbinary #trans #transgender #transmasc #transfem #transmasculine #transfeminine

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