#this game kept me alive in middle school

[everythingmp3]

⎯ ୨ 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩୧ ⎯

𝐓𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐨𝐩𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐨𝐬 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

after your fathers death, you need to push through the grief very quickly to continue his work as one of the most prominent smugglers around. still, the pain of your situation makes you fall further into unhealthy habits and despair, which nobody notices, nobody except for one of your fathers old friends: Tess. she senses that something is off with you and suddenly becomes a surprisingly strong presence in your life. eventually, your feelings for her push you towards letting your guard down.

warnings: minors dni. mentions of drug use and addiction, grief/death of a loved one, smut (reader receiving)

disclaimer: this one is long. Anna Torv got me good, I couldn’t stop thinking about her in the show. I never played the game, so accuracy was not the goal here, I just wanted to write something for the Tess we see in the show! I put a lot of thought and heart into this, so I really hope I can make some Tess girlies out there happy <3 or anyone else who is in the mood for a longer fic!

wordcount: 13k

It would have been absurd to call anyone during or after the outbreak “lucky”, considering the state of the world, but you knew in your heart that your fate had definitely been of the luckier kind. 

up until the outbreak, you and your father had been living as a duo for as long as you could remember. he had raised you as a single father in a small town where he´d worked as a professor, and your life had mostly been a content and peaceful one. 

you´d been old enough during the day of the outbreak to understand what was happening, but not old enough to remember much of it as an adult, the memories were all hazy, one big blur of panic. all you knew was that you two had left in your car in the middle of the night, never looking back once you were on the road, until you somehow got to be two of the first people inhabiting the Boston QZ. 

the first few years were anything but easy. the “schools” you went to were a joke, the structures in place were authoritative and soul crushing, everyone was traumatized and trying to cope one way or another. it was bleak, a sinister chaos, but at night when you sat around the table together, you couldn´t help but feel a sliver of gratitude, you´d both stayed alive, which was nothing short of a miracle.

for about a year post-outbreak, your father just worked whatever jobs were assigned to him, like everyone else. it was routine work, boring, dull, but it kept you two afloat. still, he got restless, a man who´d been used to hours and hours of mental stimulation and human connection, he couldn´t stay in the shadows by himself like that forever, he was itching for more. 

he had an air that granted him respect, so one day he received a proposal: his first contact to the smuggling business. at first, he was hesitant, but it was too tempting in the end, so he accepted, and it worked, better than he expected. it wasn´t exactly a natural progression, his former job in academia to that one, he saw the irony, but both jobs required people skills and he always told you: 90 percent of that kind of work is mental.

everyone was so lost during those early days, that a competent man like him, a mentor, attracted others, especially younger smugglers, like moths to a flame. his responsibilities quickly became more and more serious, people kept pushing him and a few others around his age to do the important organizing, the work that required more brain, not just intimidation and brute force, so about a year into that lifestyle, he slowly but surely became one of the top dogs in the smuggling business.

he kept his private life and business separate, always. he made sure you were safe at home while he was out, but the one thing he did right from the start, was that he told you everything about what he was doing. he knew it would not help you to stay naive and innocent, not in a world like that. he also knew you were smart and bored out of your mind, so what he did, each night, was that he told you every little detail about everyone he came into contact with, every trick he'd learned, every piece of valuable information. 

he trusted you, and he knew he wouldn´t be around to protect you forever, he wanted you to have valuable insight in your hands once you´d have to fend for yourself. so by the time you were 15, you knew pretty much everyone he worked with by name, their secrets, their ways of working, all of it. what he did not know, was that you also had a good amount of secrets of your own: what you did in your spare time, how you managed all those hours on your own.

as a teenager you´d started seeing various bottles of pills he was holding onto for deals laying around the apartment, and you were slick enough to take a few each time without him noticing. you were dealing with something, call it depression, PTSD, anxiety, or a mix of all three, but regardless of terminology: you were going through it and refused to burden him with it. it was far from ideal but taking sedatives helped, mostly Ambien but you weren´t too picky, they just had to be strong. you kept it in check, nobody noticed, not once. 

then, when you were in your early twenties, he fell ill. it was gradual but the hard life had worn him down, his heart was giving out, and all you could do, was to try to spend the rest of his days by his side, which you did. people were devastated, everyone knew him or of him, so some of them even came by your apartment to say their goodbyes, including one of his closest allies: Tess. 

you knew about all of his business partners, and Tess had been one that he really valued, spoke of very highly, always. you´d seen her around a few times and he´d told you a few stories about her, but she was a woman who kept to herself, so he was discreet, never spilling anything about her personal life.

still, she always stuck out to you among the others. even though you´d never even spoken to her, something about her seemed different to you, you could see why he´d worked with her for over a decade by that point, there was a magnetism to her that got to you. sometimes, you caught glimpses of her from afar, and wondered what it was about her, that always made you think of her for the rest of the day.

the day she came to say her goodbyes to him, you couldn´t help it: you stayed just outside of the room to listen. others had cried, been very sentimental, but she just sat there in silence for a good while with him. you swore you could hear her sniffle, but once she stepped out of the room, after you'd quickly hurried down the hall to not be caught, she looked as strong and composed as ever, giving you a small nod as she walked by, nothing more, but in her expression, you could tell she was signaling something to you, that she felt for you. something in her gaze went straight to your heart. 

as his death approached, you knew you had a choice to make. either, you could take over his business, or you could watch some random person attempt to fill the spot he´d leave vacant. early on, you knew, you´d have to take over. there was no way you´d let some psychotic power hungry tyrant swoop in and pick up all the work he´d leave up for grabs.

it was not a dream of yours to become his successor in that world, but dreams were a luxury few could afford those days, and you knew your fate could have been much worse. the decision meant that you´d have to deal with the impending grief in a way that wouldn´t leave you weak and bedbound, so you made a deal with yourself: one day. once he´d die, you´d give yourself one day to fall apart, to fall as deeply into despair as possible. and then, you´d have to get to work and forget all about it. 

even though a few of them had told him that they´d look out for you, you knew smugglers well enough to not trust their patience, their promises. if you´d stay inside grief stricken for weeks, they´d lose respect, they´d forget about you, someone else would catch their attention. besides, you had no interest in pity, in being handled like some precious little thing at risk of falling apart on her own. so, things played out exactly how you planned.

the day he died, you were inconsolable. it was darkness beyond imagination, loneliness unlike you´d ever felt it, your one guardian, one confidant: gone. the tears left your face swollen red, your body exhausted, so at night, you knocked yourself out really well with an extra high dose, knowing you´d have to step out the next day looking normal, respectable, hard to intimidate. 

at first, there were some nerves, but the second you started talking to people, discussing plans, handling deals, you realized you could almost do all of it on auto-pilot because you´d spent years and years absorbing all of his ideas, his language and mannerisms. you were basically inhabiting his ghost as you started making it known that you were taking over, for good, and nobody seemed to question it, even though you were barely above twenty. something about you gave them the vibe of do not mess with her. 

you were convincing in your new position and it helped that they were glad to cling to you, as a biological extension of his legacy. it worked, people respected you, you made sure his previous connections were properly taken over.

still, you felt absolutely horrible. deep down you were eaten up by grief, you were lonely, exhausted, but you simply couldn´t let it show, ever. your habit with the pills became much worse immediately. you used a pretty high dosage to sleep through entire evenings and nights, then you somehow got up and went out to do what you had to do, and repeated that cycle every day, not leaving yourself even one moment of just sitting around and thinking, because you knew once you´d let yourself do that: you´d break. 

what you didn´t know, was that Tess had told people to report to her how you were doing. 

she knew about you, she knew his death would leave you to your own devices, and at first she was convinced you´d be uninterested in taking over, but once she heard that you were doing it, she was alerted. she thought you´d fall flat on your face. a grieving daughter taking all that on? no way. but soon after, she heard back from people that you were working as if nothing had happened, and it puzzled her, that you were shouldering all of it seemingly without trouble. something in her told her: go have a look at that girl, something seems off there. 

Tess remembered your kind face the day she´d seen your father for the last time, the look of something so fragile, so soft in there, it just did not mix with the things she was hearing about you the weeks after his passing. 

so, about three weeks after he died, she made her way to your apartment, knocking around 8 pm. the second you opened the door, you knew of course who the intimidating looking woman in front of you was, but you just looked at her until she said “hey, could I come in for a second?”, her voice low and admittedly kind of alluring, you nodded, waving her in. 

she was the first person who´d had the guts to just come over unannounced, nobody had bothered to come and check on you, which you were mostly glad about, but you couldn´t deny the fact that it felt nice to have someone there for once. 

she walked into the nearest room, the kitchen, with a confidence as if the apartment was hers. you followed, watching her sit down a chair that she pulled away from the dining table, while you stood across the room, leaning against the wall. she cleared her throat, looking at you, her piercing eyes almost making you nervous then. 

“okay listen. your father might have told you this, but just in case he didn´t: i don´t do bullshit. i don´t like to waste time, not mine, not other people´s, so i´m gonna get straight to the point here, okay?” you stared at her, the way she was resting her hands on her knees, leaning forward to emphasize what she was saying, her eyes unyielding. 

you couldn´t help but feel a sense of admiration, her strength practically radiating off of her, you nodded, “sure go ahead”. 

Tess looked at you with something disbelief, “what the fuck is going on?” she asked, quiet, stern. you were not unaffected by the tone, but you were unsure what precisely she was referring to, “what do you mean?”. she shook her head, “save the coy act with me. you know what I mean. the person you have lived with your whole life dies and then two fucking days later you´re out there taking over his business like nothing ever happened? come on. tell me what´s going on here”. you felt caught for a second but then you realized she was only suspecting, she had nothing in her hands to prove that anything was wrong with you, so you did what you did best: deny it.

“I mean… I see how that could seem a bit strange but what good would it do to just weep and mope around all day? I can´t change what happened. I don´t need to cry all day, I can work, I can function, it´s fine.” you almost believed yourself, you were a good liar, but not good enough to fool Tess, hardly anyone could lie to her without being caught. she could tell that beneath the convincing way of putting it that way, you weren´t telling the truth. it was hard to pinpoint how exactly she could tell, because your voice was no giveaway, neither was your demeanor, but something told her immediately that you were a person who knew how to hide things well, partially because she had the same talent herself. 

“that sounds great on paper, really, but the way your father described you, it just doesn´t make sense, sorry, I don´t buy it.”

you were a little defensive then. “oh yeah, what did he say?” she grinned for a moment, relieved you were at least in a state that allowed you to push back.

 “well, he liked to brag. he often told me how sweet you were, how you remained kind and thoughtful even during the end of the fucking world, with him doing shady business and no mother around to look after you. i recall the word “angel” being used a few times. I don´t see a girl like that being all unaffected and tough mere days after her dad´s death, not without finding some strange ways to cope. so I am concerned.”

you took in the words, almost emotional then, but keeping it together, struck by the word concern. nobody had clocked it, that you weren´t truly doing that great, but here Tess came, unwilling to just take the lie and leave you be. part of you felt relief at being seen for once, by her of all people, the one regularly described as “cold. hardass. not to go to with puppy eyes asking for forgiveness after fucking a job up”. there she was, inquiring about a stranger´s well being. still, you couldn´t get yourself to give her the answer she wanted.

“concerned? you hardly know me” you deflected, and she scoffed then, throwing her hands up, “yeah sure. you´re only the freshly orphaned daughter of a man I knew for about 15 years, why should i give a fuck, right?”. you couldn´t argue with that, realizing that she was also just trying her best to do the right thing. 

“sorry, I didn´t mean it like that. it´s just, i am doing everything right. why do i have to justify that?”. you were defensive because you knew, if you allowed yourself to open up to her, it would end with you in tears, and you weren´t up for it. still, it hurt, to be offered some solace and refuse it. 

she insisted, “yes but that´s exactly what strikes me as odd. now would be the moment to do it all wrong, to be weak, to mess up, yet here you are, walking those damn streets like you´re the new sheriff in town. and hey, i´ll give it to you, you´re doing a good job, but something is off, and i want to understand.”

“I am just doing what has to be done” you said, a defeated tone to it, which she didn´t love hearing. she was losing her patience, “listen to me. you should be taking a break right now. this is about the hardest thing to go through, you should not be pushing yourself the way you are, not right now, not like this”.

you were quiet, looking at her, your eyes not obviously soft but something was in there, she saw a glimpse of vulnerability, but then it escaped her again. you were stubborn, a few more moments of your wordlessness made her realize that you wouldn´t talk. Tess knew she was onto something but you wouldn´t let her in, so she leaned back and exhaled, looking up at the ceiling, her shirt lifting up a little, a glimpse of her skin, it burned in your vision for a split second.

“okay, you don´t wanna talk, that´s fine. but trust me, I know grief and I know denial. I´ve been around long enough to have seen it many times, what repression of all that shit can do to someone. so, I guess, this is my way of saying: be careful. and I might not be the one for big speeches or touchy feely shit, but I do care. so, keep that in mind if you ever need… well, help.” she got up then, straightening out her clothes, running her hands through her long slightly gray hair, looking a little worn out from the day, but still, extremely striking. she was a sight that stirred something deep inside of you, you couldn´t deny it, even while being confronted by her, you couldn´t stop feel a pull in her direction. 

she walked towards the door but stopped for a moment when she was close to where you were standing, looking at you for second, a hint of a smile:

“well, i´ll give it to him, he raised no fool, that´s for sure”, you cracked a small smile too then, not rewarding her with a lot of words though, “thanks, Tess. I´ll keep all that in mind”, that was the first time you ever used her name to address her and it hit a nerve in her, like a wave of electricity running through her at the sound, but she didn´t let it show, instead she briefly patted your shoulder, saying “take care”, and left.

the second she was out on the street again, Tess realized that it was a good idea for her to leave your apartment, because the idea of you being all on your own there, spending entire nights in that dark, empty place, did not leave her cold, at all, and she had no interest in growing too emotionally involved. there was something about you that she had not expected and it was messing with her, it was making her mind spin.

whenever your dad had talked about you, she had pictured someone more like a teenager, but you were anything but that. you were a grown woman, young but clearly marked by the tough life you´d lived, someone she couldn´t just crack with one stern look. you had an air of nonchalance that was hard won; she knew you´d paid a prize to keep up a facade like that. 

a pretty facade, she had to admit, you were undeniably beautiful. Tess was not one for crushes, but she knew an attractive woman when she saw one. you did not dress much differently than the other women she knew, but still, you were so different, your face had a distinct look that got to her: your eyes, your expression, the way you´d looked at her, it all stuck with her, that image of you, sitting there at the kitchen table, backlit by the setting sun: burned into her mind. 

she knew there was no way around it, she´d keep thinking of you, wondering what you were actually thinking, feeling, what you did during those hours at night all on your own, how you managed to work the way you did, what you were hiding, how you managed your grief, whether you cried or not, what you were afraid of, what you did to seem as unafraid as you did. 

most of her days were spent talking to people she didn´t care about one bit, often even actively resented, so sensing the potential of actually caring about a person, and even better, being challenged by their cleverness, it made it impossible for her not to wonder how she might find an excuse to talk to you again. Tess was not heartless, she might have been perceived that way, but she knew, deep down, that it was only a matter of time until she´d give up the i don´t give a fuck attitude for someone who needed her to. and something was telling her, you might be that person.

as she left your apartment, a voice inside her was telling her: 

keep an eye on that girl. she might need someone one of these days, and the others don´t see it.

it was also telling her:

don´t you dare fall for your dead friend´s daughter.

the weeks leading up to that night, you´d done your best to remain numb, nothing had really gotten to you, you´d kept yourself busy or knocked out, but then, one brief visit from Tess and you were shaken up, moved, affected. within ten minutes she´d managed to reach some part of you that you´d kept shut off. something about her presence was both comforting and thrilling. you´d had crushes before, but it was different with her, the word almost too mild and cute to describe the visceral nature of it. once she left your apartment you just sat in your kitchen for about half an hour, quiet, thinking, unable to process what you were feeling. 

that night you dreamed for the first time in ages. you couldn´t recall the details the next morning, but you knew it was about her, and your body was warm in your bed even though the apartment was freezing cold. 

you knew you couldn´t just go to her without a reason, you had too much pride to just admit to her that you wanted more of her company, so you tried to ignore it, but the following week you thought of Tess a lot, so much so that you found yourself perking up whenever anyone around you mentioned her. then, one day, someone came up to you as you were busy dealing with something and told you she´d asked for you, for you to come to her the next morning, something about a job she was involved in. 

you wondered why she would ask for you specifically, but regardless of her reasoning, you were just excited to be able to see her again without even having to initiate it. so, the next morning you made your way to the address you´d been given. you knew your way around, you knew that it was the bottom floor of this abandoned warehouse that people in your line of work often used to meet discretely. 

the second you stepped inside, you saw two women you recognized, two guys, and Tess, sitting around a make shift table out of boxes, various maps and papers spread out over it. Tess locked eyes with you immediately and got up, waving you over to step aside with her for a moment, knowing you´d probably have questions. 

she looked at you, a smile, “thanks for coming” you nodded, “sure no problem. so, what is this?” you asked, crossing your arms, she realized she owed you an explanation, “well. there´s something rather big we have to plan. and what I´ve been hearing from people tells me that you´re one of the brighter ones around”, a grin as she said this, “so, I thought why not ask you to join? couldn´t hurt to have your input”. you were listening, eyes on her face, and something told you that she wasn´t telling the whole truth. 

part of you felt like she might be testing you, wanting to see if everyone was just cutting you some slack and exaggerating your skillset, but you were up for it, “sure, I´ll do what I can”. “alright then” she pulled you by the arm, the brief touch making you feel more than you hoped it would, but even a small squeeze from her hand did something to you. you tried to forget about it as you sat down next to her.

they quickly filled you in. getting people across city limits was nothing new, but it was gonna be about 5 people, which was a lot. the plan needed to be perfect, you needed to make sure that it was all ideal; the time of day, the routes they would take, possible quick escape routes too if trouble came their way, calculating possible run ins with law enforcement, mapping out where they usually stood guard, every detail had to be considered. 

you let the others do most of the talking, only chiming in when you had a correction to make, a better suggestion, or needed to explain why certain things wouldn´t work. you observed most of the time, but the few remarks you made were precise and helpful, you could tell they were glad to have you around, even Tess, who was not easily impressed, nodded in approval multiple times when you said something. at times you could feel her looking at you from the side, even when you weren´t talking and you wondered why; was she concerned? curious? or, maybe, just maybe, did she also find you intriguing?

similarly you also found yourself staring at her kind of in awe whenever she talked, resting your face on your hand, just looking, her voice almost soothing you to a point of spacing out. you tried your best to listen to the words being said, but it wasn´t easy, with her sitting so close to you, her body somehow waking yours up after weeks up feeling dead. 

before you knew it, you´d spent almost the entire day just sitting there, talking, planning, at times stepping away to drink something or stretch your limbs. by the time it got dark, you were done. as the others stood around talking for a while, you already stepped out, catching some air, leaning against the wall of the house, clearing your head for a moment before going home. after a few minutes, you saw the others leaving, waving goodbye, Tess following shortly after, making her way over to you, taking up the empty space next to you. 

at first neither of you talked, both just staring ahead, tired from the day, but then she spoke up, “you were good today”, her voice lower and raspier than at the beginning of the day, getting under skin. you knew that counted as high praise from her, so you smiled, looking at her, “thanks. I guess I passed your test then, huh?” she stared at you, her eyes giving away that you´d caught her off guard with that, it amused you, so you went on “it´s fine, I get it, I wasn´t counting on any nepotism treatment”, she raised her eyebrows then, “smart AND funny, huh?” laced with obvious irony. you shook your head, looking back at the street, she smiled to herself, realizing more and more that she shouldn´t underestimate you, since you kept surprising her, but it was a challenge she was eager to accept: figuring you out. 

“well, I know for a fact he couldn´t have taught you all that. I know enough smart guys whose kids can barely count to five so… it´s definitely not just a family thing”, you appreciated that, she continued, staring up at the sky, leaning her head back against the wall, “to be honest it´s kind of eerie at times, you at your age, talking like that” she admitted, you turned to her then, facing her more directly, “yeah? how so?”, she shrugged, breathing out, “I don´t know. I guess you´re so young, but already so..” you completed the sentence “jaded?”, she laughed then, the sound of it getting to you, “no, no, that´s not what I mean. it´s just, you should be.. more carefree I guess. as much as I hate dealing with stupid mistakes by youngsters, it does feel odd that you´re so fucking composed already”. 

you considered it, you could tell there was genuine sympathy in there and she wasn´t wrong either, it was pretty clear you weren´t exactly out there being young and wild, “well, I guess spending most of my time only talking to and living with a middle aged man did that”.

she nodded, an understanding smile, “right. well, maybe it's time to change that sweetheart, huh?” you couldn´t tell if she was being genuine or fucking with you, you looked her, squinting your eyes, “you know I can´t exactly get in trouble, Tess. not even a little”.

she knew what you meant, “fun” for younger people those days mostly meant breaking into empty buildings, drinking or getting high there, attempting parties, but with your lifestyle, you knew run-ins with FEDRA were to be avoided at all costs, so nothing like that was on the table for you. besides, it wasn´t exactly your idea of fun, you´d rather find someone to spend time with one on one, but you weren´t gonna tell her all that, not in that moment. 

she nodded, “yeah i know. still, there´s gotta be some way for you to have fun, hm?” it sounded slightly suggestive the way she said it, “sure, i´ll find a way, one day”, you kept it vague too, and she left it at that, since she saw that you were shivering from the cold, “come on, let´s go, you´re also headed down there, right?” pointing down the street you both had to take home, “yeah i am”. you followed her, walking close but not too close, wishing you could link arms, warm yourself up against her. for a second Tess almost offered you her jacket, but she realized how romantic that would´ve seemed, and let it go.

you were rarely scared, not even at night, but it did feel nice for a change, to have someone as intimidating and capable as her next to you, it felt good. she looked ahead, seemingly lost in thought, but she could tell you were looking at her from the side, and she almost felt frustrated by how nervous it made her. nothing made her blood rush anymore those days, not fear, not excitement, nothing; she was hardened, so feeling like she might actually flush from feeling you look at her almost irritated her for a moment, something so simple breaking her open, but she liked it, deep down she did.

you walked in silence for about a minute, and it was ironic that you had thought about feeling safe next to her, because out of nowhere a loud bang startled both of you. you stopped in your tracks, your minds racing: was it a gunshot? an explosion? a car crashing into something? it was too far to tell, but close enough to be alarmed. five seconds passed of you two standing there frozen, listening, before gunfire opened nearby. you could hear what sounded like a pretty large group of FEDRA assholes quickly stomping down the street, and within one second Tess had her own gun in her hand, yanking your arm with the other one, instructing with urgency “run!”, not letting go, pulling you down the street. from the look of it she had her eyes on some escape route and she did. 

in that moment it became crystal clear that she had years and years of experience on you, while you were still thinking she had only needed a split second to do the right thing, to think of a way out. by the sound of it they were coming dangerously close, you could hear screaming, shots being fired, the darkness ruptured by car lights, you had very little distance between you and them, and Tess made you run faster than you´d run in ages, never letting go of your hand. she pulled you into a small alley, letting go once you reached a few metal trash cans that she immediately kicked to the side, revealing a small door that lead into the backside of the tall building it belonged to, ripping it open and pushing you inside, before following and banging the door shut behind you.

you were out of breath, trying to think. the room smelled ancient, damp and was completely dark, there was no way of seeing, but you could hear her breathing and cursing under her breath next to you. “jesus fucking christ” you said, “crack-downs usually only happen during the day what is their fucking problem??”. you were pissed, your lungs were stinging. “yeah, get used to it, lately it´s been all the fucking time” by the sound of it she was still hunched over and very out of breath, you couldn´t help but laugh then, “I take it running isn´t one of your hobbies, huh?”. 

she couldn´t see, so she just guessed where you were standing and slapped in that direction, making contact with your stomach for a second, “just you wait til you´re old, see how funny this is then”. you were grinning, “old? Tess, you´re barely over 40”, she shook her head, calming down, resting against the wall then, “how about you quit the comedy and say: thank you Tess for saving me. I´m so grateful you weren´t a deer in headlights like me and dragged my ass to safety”. you mirrored her actions then, you arm hitting hers in the dark, “fuck off, you were just quick as hell”, she took it as a compliment, secretly enjoying the more familiar vibe that was suddenly in the air, “yeah I was, lucky for you”. 

“so, what is this place?” you asked, “little thing I discovered back in the day. as you know this area isn´t exactly the greatest, they love targeting us here so yeah, saved my ass a few times, but it´s been a while”, “cozy.” you said, flatly, “hey, if you wanna go back out there and get your head blown off instead, be my guest” she snapped back, it was funny to you, how easy it was to rile her up.

“I think about an hour and we´ll be fine to leave. things usually die down within that time frame”, “an hour??” you exclaimed, clearly not happy. “yes, an hour. don´t act like you have anywhere else to be, I know you don´t”, “wow okay, rub it in, go ahead”, she smiled then, perhaps she´d exaggerated a little, maybe half an hour would have been fine, maybe she´d subconsciously bought herself more time with you.

“we don´t have to stand here by the way, there´s a ladder somewhere that leads to a hallway and room, go on feel around, it can´t be far”, you started searching for it in the dark, hands reaching into empty space until something would show up, “so I´ll just climb up in total darkness and crack my head open if I miss a step and fall?”, she shook her head “alright, drama queen. if anything I´ll crack my head, you´re going ahead of me, so worst case you´ll fall back onto me”, you smiled then, safe to do so because she couldn´t see, “still, not great”. you found it, “here, come”. you could feel her close behind you while stepping onto the ladder, a few steps up, you could feel her following, her hands on your back then, sending a shiver down your spine that you hoped she didn´t feel.

“go on, i got it” she reassured. it wasn´t far up, a few moments later you could feel a floor, your palms flat against it, pulling yourself up, letting out an audible groan as you tried to get up on your feet from that position, she laughed, “and you of all people had the audacity to make fun of my fitness”, “shut up” you whispered, as you could feel her standing up behind you, reaching for you to make sure you were both far away enough from the ledge, her fingers making your skin feel warmer.

“there´s a lightswitch somewhere here, wait” she slapped the stone wall in random places until a tiny lightbulb above you flickered on, your eyes adjusting for a second. once you could see again, you both realized you´d been holding onto each other´s arms pretty tightly and let go at the same time, seeing each other´s faces, a little flushed, and for a moment you just stared at each other, collecting yourselves, before she looked around, pointing down the small corridor, “come”. you followed, watching her adjust her shirt, her usual half up half down hairstyle somehow even better after it had come undone a little, you tried to snap out of it, but her physicality was drawing all of your attention in.

she pushed the door open, there was some resistance from the old wood but it was no struggle for her; Tess was strong, you knew that of course but actually seeing it like that was something you could get used to. the room was barely bigger than a broom closet but you could both sit on the floor. she slid down the wall, motioning for you to follow. you sat across from each other, knees almost touching.

“oh fuck” she grabbed your hand, you had no idea what was going on until you looked down: your knuckles were bleeding. you´d scraped them but couldn´t even remember how or where, which she took note of, the fact that your body seemed to be so numb that you didn´t even register an injury. “oh..” you said, unfazed, “hold on” Tess said, and before you could stop her she took the hem of her shirt in her hands and pretty violently ripped a part of it off, telling you to hold out your hand before quickly tying the soft fabric around, over your knuckles, the blood getting soaked up by it, “there you go”. you shook your head, “that really wasn´t necessary Tess, you fucked up your shirt for me”, she waved it off, “oh who cares, we can´t have open wounds here”. you looked down at where she´d bandaged you, a sting in your heart: how long had it been since someone had shown you care like that? 

you put your head in your hands then, a sudden throbbing headache. you were usually already asleep in a drug induced haze at that hour and you knew your body was eager to shut down, but you forced yourself awake, rubbing your temples, sitting upright again.

she was observing you, quietly, just looking, “you okay there?”, “yeah yeah, just… long day, that´s all”, she nodded, slowly “right. you wanna stop lying to me any time soon, or no?”.

you met her gaze then, she held it, refusing to let it go, you shrugged “I don´t know what you want me to say, Tess”, whatever she was doing was working, you were not in a position to lie with her that close to you, that attentive, picking up on every little mannerism. 

“how about you start by telling me how you´re actually doing. what you´re doing to cope. because i know it´s not fucking meditation or journaling”, a tired smile from you then, you briefly broke eye contact, thinking about how to put it, before looking back at her.

“I think the answer is so obvious that it flew over your head”, she was confused then, “how so?”, you cocked your head, “come on, Tess. in our business? what does literally everyone do to cope?”. her eyes went wide then, she shook her head, “no. I can tell you´re not on drugs, I know the look”.

“well, i don´t do it during the day…” she looked alarmed, “what the fuck are you telling me?” you felt vulnerable then, having actually put it out there. you were looking at her with pleading eyes, not wanting to say it word for word, hoping she´d catch on. she was louder then, “jesus fucking christ, what kind of drugs?” your voice was quiet, a little defensive, “well, I don´t drink and I don´t smoke. so you do the math.” 

she pressed her hands together, looking at the floor for a moment, she seemed angry, “you´re hooked on pills, that's what you´re saying?”, you shrugged, “I don´t know if hooked is the word I´d use-” she interrupted, her tone hard, unforgiving “that´s exactly what someone who is hooked would say”, you threw your hands up, defeated, “right okay”. 

she tried to calm down a little, “how much?”, you debated lying, but it was clear you were past that, there was no point, so you told her the average amount you took, and the shock on her face didn´t feel great. “are you fucking with me? that could knock out a horse!”, her voice echoed through the empty hall, a moment of silence after, you didn´t feel shame but something related to it, seeing her react that strongly mirrored back to you how serious your situation was. she shook her head for a while, processing, her hand on your knee then, firm as she spoke, “you´re gonna have to stop that. and I mean it. that shit could easily kill you if you don´t”. you didn´t have it in you to fight then, you just looked at her, no words were coming, “oh, so that´s fine with you, yeah?”, you got angry too then.

“hey I didn´t choose this fucking life okay? I did what I could to not go insane, and considering all the nut-jobs i´ve had to deal with, I´d say i´m not doing that bad of a job”, Tess realized then that it wouldn´t help to be accusatory, she let up a little, feeling sympathy for you as she watched you nervously fidget with your clothes.

“he had no clue, did he?” she asked, quietly, you shook your head “no, thank god. he had enough to worry about” she eyed you, something like respect mixed into the obvious concern, “you really know how to keep a secret, don´t you?” she knew it must´ve been years of that habit for it to sound as casual as it did, coming out of your mouth, and it mostly pained her to think of you as a teenager doing all that, but somehow it also impressed her: the fact that nobody ever caught on. 

you didn´t smile then, but your expression became lighter, “yeah, you´re actually the only one who knows now”, that surprised her, touched her a little even, realizing that it must´ve been pretty vulnerable of you to tell her. “really?”, you nodded, “hm yeah. guess you should feel good about yourself, your intuition is still in-tact”, she almost laughed then, “right, that´s a huge consolation, that I was right about you having some fucked up secret”.

you looked at her with clear affection then, your walls had come down and she saw it, returning the look, glad she´d actually gotten somewhere with you. “well, I might have to drag you out at night, to stop all that”, you shook your head “that would not be pretty, I´d be a mess, you´d hate it”, “oh, I´d manage” she said, sounding convinced of it.

you smiled, “thank you, but no”. she got it, you were grown and had to deal with it on your own, still, she hated the idea of leaving you to your own devices. her soft spot for you had only grown softer all day; sitting next to you for hours, listening to your thoughts, your voice, the feeling of your hand as you both ran off, the feeling of you so close in that room, being trusted with something you hadn´t told anyone before. Tess was in deep, and she knew it, she tried hard to let it go, but it was a losing battle. seeing you there, your face half-lit by the weak lightbulb, your knees pulled to your chest, your eyes, tired but beautiful, it gave her the urge to reach out and touch you, make you feel better, but she kept it in, sat there stone-faced, mostly, but you saw something, it was there, her demeanor had shifted. 

for few minutes you just sat there in silence, both lost in thought, resting against the walls, eyes closed. she realized that it might be a good idea to repay you for your honesty, to not let you sit alone in the uncomfortable feeling of having shared something personal, so she spoke up, “listen. I don´t usually talk about this stuff because it´s been ages and I don´t want pity or consolation, but I lost everyone I cared about during the outbreak, truly all of them, and for a good while I thought I´d never survive it. but, here I am. and I am not saying that it´s been easy, not at all, but I did survive it, so. keep that in mind when you feel like it´s all too much.” 

you took in the words. it was rare, for her to speak of her past, you sensed that she might actually be trying to get closer to you, to bond, “I´m really sorry, that must´ve been awful. it probably still is. but you´re stronger than me, Tess, I can´t compare myself to you”. 

she shook her head “no, I´ve just had time to polish the facade, trust me. you should´ve seen me about a decade ago, I was going through it, it was ugly”, you looked at her then, realizing that beneath her tough aura that seemed so effortless, so natural, there was also a lot of pain, a lot of hurt she´d pushed through, sensitivity she kept to herself. 

it felt good, to share the feeling of being softer on the inside than either of you let on. you absentmindedly rested your head on her leg, your body clearly tired from the day, more prone to random acts of affection like that without thinking twice, you didn´t care in that moment, she didn´t either, patting your hand with hers a little, resting it there for a second. 

“you´ll be fine” she declared, you locked eyes with her, “I´ll try”, her hand squeezing yours reassuringly. “trust me, I´ve seen lost causes, that´s not you”, you looked at her then, “yeah, what am I then?”, she smiled, “a salvageable cause” you laughed then, “I´ll take that”.

she was glad to see you loosening up again. it was soothing, the dark confined space, the quiet, the vibe that had settled between you and her, it felt like you were hidden from the world, like you´d been offered a brief moment of peace, without thinking you rested your head on your knees, closing your eyes for a second, Tess watched you, feeling protective over you, her hand resting on your leg that was propped up in her direction. after a while you felt her nudging you.

“I think we should be fine to go now” she said, and you tried to mask the disappointment, wishing you could stay there with her longer, which was a feeling you weren´t alone in. 

she stood first and pulled you up, again, no struggle for her, her hand´s grip on yours too brief, you wished she´d have kept holding it like that. as you both stood there, face to face, a little raw from the personal discussion, something passed between you; the air was charged, both of you felt it, searching the other person´s eyes, your bodies barely an inch apart, but before it could lead anywhere, you both got scared of doing something you´d regret and looked away, acting casual,  or at least trying to. you made your way down to the door, she tentatively opened it, not all the way, gauging the situation outside first, but it was all quiet, so she waved you out.

it was pitch black by then, freezing, a clear night, the full moon illuminating the streets. somehow there was a shared agreement between you and Tess, that what you´d said in that little room would stay in there, almost like a confession booth; the moment you were walking down the street, you were both your usual tough selves again. 

the walk home was wordless, your house was the first you reached, and at first you just stood there, almost shy, both unsure how to say goodnight after spending the entire day together, both thinking things you wouldn´t say.

Tess broke the silence first, “so. I know you´re about as bad as me at accepting help, but I´ll say it one more time: I am here if there´s ever anything I can do for you. and maybe pick up smoking instead of.. you know” a genuine laugh from you then, “okay, good idea. and thank you. for-” you gestured around between you and her, trying to convey gratitude without specifying what exactly for, she got it, “don´t mention it, you´re by far not the worst person to be trapped in a room with” she said with a smug grin, before giving your shoulder a brief squeeze and saying goodnight. as she walked off your gaze fell down to your bandaged knuckles, and something in you told you she wouldn´t have done that for just anyone. at least you hoped so.

that night you didn´t consciously skip the drugs, her asking you to quit was not enough to kill that instinct; you simply forgot. the next morning you couldn´t even remember how you´d undressed, showered, and gotten into bed, you´d been so lost in your thoughts about Tess, that you´d somehow fallen asleep before you could reach for any self-medication. 

you couldn´t help but see the irony, that she´d berated you for the habit and without knowing it actually succeeded in getting you to stop that day, not with her words, but with the deep attraction you felt to her, the way it took over your whole mind and body, no space left for worrying about anything other than when you´d see her again. 

the next few days, nothing much changed. a whole week went by, then another, and nothing in particular was worse than the weeks before, but that was the issue; it was an endless cycle of living the same day. you felt like you were trapped doing the exact same things over and over, nothing to look forward to, nobody to talk to other than people you were involved with for work, it was just sleep and business and suppression of anything unpleasant you were feeling, every day, no moments of peace or laughter or joy, no light at the end of the tunnel. 

one night about a month after you´d last seen Tess, except for a brief nod from across the street a few times, you couldn´t take it anymore. it was late, you were alone in your apartment and the silence was killing you, the loneliness, the same routine, all of it. you had to move and get up, so you stepped outside at 11 pm, knowing there was only one person you could go to. 

you were counting on Tess still being awake at that hour. once you reached her apartment door you were nervous, the second you knocked you felt adrenaline rushing, because you realized you hadn´t even bothered to make up a lie as to why you were there. she opened the door and looked at you with a smile that said and who do we have here?.

the moment Tess laid eyes on you, she could tell you weren´t doing any better than the last time she´d seen you. the light in your eyes had dimmed even more, so she saved the jokes and the teasing, she didn´t demand an explanation, “come in”, relief washed over you as you stepped inside. you followed her down the dark hallway to the living room that was connected to an open kitchen, you took in the room and unsurprisingly it did not give much away about her; decorations were sparse, no posters on the wall, no sentimental photos, but a few candles were burning and the room seemed like a peaceful space.

“sorry, I know it´s late”, you said, slightly self-conscious, aware it might seem odd to just turn up like that, but she turned to look at you as she walked over the the kitchen, clearly unbothered, “oh no, don´t worry, I never sleep before midnight anyway”. it almost felt more humiliating, to be treated with kindness, somehow you didn´t feel deserving of it. 

she saw you standing in the middle of the room, a little timid, so she gestured over to the couch emphatically, “sit.” it sounded more like an order than an invitation, which you liked, her brand of care that always had a subtle touch of dominance to it. 

as you sat down, trying to position your body in a way that would look natural, she came over, bending down to hand you a glass of water, “here, drink”, her voice warm and strong.

she didn´t sit down next to you on the couch, but on the armchair next to it, you almost told her to come and join you but you knew how that would have sounded, so you drank up, set the glass down and faced her. 

she had crossed her legs and was leaning her head on her hand by then, watching you, her hardened face somehow much softer in the candlelight, her eyes shimmering, her hair falling down her face in loose waves, the sight making all your unexpressed feelings for her bubble up. you tried not to just stare at her as she spoke up, “so. couldn´t sleep?”.

you shook your head, leaning back a little, exhaling shakily, looking over at her, “no. not at all”. “hmm” she waited a moment before asking “wanna tell me why?”. you knew you hadn´t come over to lie, so you nodded, “yeah. well, I stopped taking anything like three weeks ago”, she leaned forward then, “that´s good, I´m glad. did anything prompt that, or did you just stop because you wanted to?”. 

she was onto something, and you felt the need to share it, “no, there was a moment. it was pretty dumb actually, one day I just fell, or collapsed I should say, out of nowhere. I know all the side effects but that one had never happened before, and I landed pretty fucking hard”. you were a little shy as you pulled up your shirt to reveal the left side of your ribs, the bruises were faded because it had been a few weeks but the outline was still very much there, faint yellow and green, the way bruises look towards the end of the healing process, the impact had spanned over multiple of your ribs. 

Tess flinched for a second when she saw your skin, a mix of attraction and pain, “jesus…” she whispered, trying to suppress the urge walk over and see it up close, “I´m so sorry, that must´ve hurt like hell”, you nodded, letting your shirt down again, a little embarrassed by the story. she was clearly affected by it, her eyes giving it away, “and let me guess, you didn´t ask for help or stay in bed, did you?”, you just looked at her, wordlessly signaling that she was right of course. 

she changed the way she was sitting then, relaxing her posture again, shaking her head a little, “what are we gonna do with you, hm?” a faint smile, eyeing you the way you eye someone who just fucked something up, but in a way that somehow makes you feel even more softly towards them. 

you continued, nervously running your hand up and down your thigh, “Tess, it´s been awful. really, I can´t sleep anymore. I am awake all the fucking time, it´s horrible.”,

your voice tinged with a sense of hopelessness that alarmed her, she tried to frame it positively for you, “well, then it´s impressive I´d say, that you pushed through for a few weeks already. despite all that”. you considered it “right, yeah I guess. but I feel no better than before. I don´t know Tess, I´m -” your gaze was cast to the floor, you were clearly struggling to find the right words, she encouraged you, “what is it? tell me”, you looked back at her again, “it´s just… is this all there is?” you vaguely gestured around, she cocked her head, “you´ll have to be a little more specific than that, sweetheart”. 

“I mean this life we´re living. of course I wasn´t naive when I was younger, it was obvious I wouldn´t get to live a dream, still, I did have hope for something. but now that I´m in it, it´s so bleak. it´s the same meaningless shit every single day, and I just can´t stomach the fact that this is gonna be my life forever. how in the world have you been doing this for so long? I don´t get it, Tess, it´s fucking killing me” your voice was different than usual, she knew your usual tone: composed, slow, unwavering, but in that moment it was flipped, you sounded panicked, and it hurt, it hurt her to see someone like you in that state, knowing how much it must´ve taken to break you down like that. 

she waited for a moment, but she just couldn´t stay in her seat any longer, so she got up and sat down next to you, speaking quietly, softly, “listen. I get what you´re saying, and I won´t deny it, it gets dark times, it definitely does, but you´re in a particularly rough spot right now, and it will not be this level of awful forever. trust me, I´d know.” 

you looked up at her then, adjusting your posture to face her properly. Tess was many things, but she was not a liar, so you tried your best to really absorb what she´d said, to internalize it. “okay. I do believe you” she nodded, glad you were receptive to her comfort, her gaze fell to your left hand then, a few leftover bruises from the fall were also visible there. instinctively, without thinking twice,  she reached out, her fingers ever so lightly running over the discolored skin, the sudden tenderness almost made you cry, she kept looking at your hand, kept holding it, “why didn´t you come to me earlier?” a genuine question. 

you were so focused on how good it felt to be touched by her that it took you a second to answer, “I don´t know. what could you have done?”, she almost laughed then, “use your imagination, the things anyone with half a heart would do for an injured person: be nice, make some tea, maybe if I was feeling really crazy even offer a hug” you smiled then, “right. that does sound good”, “yeah, too bad you´re so strict with that suffering in silence vow you took”, you regained some humor then, “well if I wasn´t, I might have shown up here like this many times already so. careful what you wish for” she grinned then, “and you think I would´ve found that horrible, yeah?” you shrugged, “I don´t know, you tell me”.

she shook her head, amused by your refusal to see that she would pretty much drop anything to help you at any given time, “I don´t do charity, sweetie. when I say I´m here for someone, I mean it” you squeezed her hand then, realizing she´d been holding onto yours for the past minute or so. you were both looking at each other, feeling each other´s leg because you were sitting so close, faces not far apart, not at all, and something shifted in a split second. it had been a while since either of you had been with someone, but in that moment it was like your bodies were simultaneously remembering what desire feels like, more intensely than ever before, and you both saw it in the other person, mirrored back. 

Tess was the first to move, she put her hand to your cheek, her thumb almost brushing over your lips, her gaze wandering over every part of your face, your breathing heavier instantly, you looked at her with pleading eyes, but she had given you that physical cue to make the decision yours. you saw her waiting, hoping, and gave in, hand on the side of her face, fingers in her hair, pulling her in for a kiss, harder than you intended, impatient, your lips warm against hers, your body immediately leaning in as close as possible, it took Tess one second to react, but the moment she felt you kissing her with that deep eagerness, it hit her: oh. this girl really wants me.

so she grabbed you with both hands and deepened the kiss, letting you climb onto her, holding you in place as you both abandoned restraint and hungrily kissed each other over and over until you felt your tongue against hers and slowed it down a little to savor it, softly moaning into her mouth, hearing her sounds mix with yours, turning each other on even more, her hands going lower and lower on your body, stopping at your waist, your back, her grip on you almost as arousing as the kiss, your whole body melting into her touch, the tension thick and heavy, your bodies almost overheating. your movements were desperate, your sounds too, everything about it was, it truly seemed like no amount of closeness was close enough, like you were so starved you might actually devour each other. 

she could feel you pushing up against her while you kissed, and as you both caught your breaths for a moment, she could tell you needed more from her, it was not the time for anything that would take too long, not in that moment, but she knew she could help you relax, release some tension, and as if you could read her mind she could hear you begging “please Tess”, your face close to hers, a shiver as she heard the neediness in your voice, luckily clothes were pretty loose, no need to fumble with a zipper or undress, she had no trouble just slipping her hand under the fabric, down to your underwear, she could hear you take a sharp breath in.

 “I got you” she reassured, “let me make you feel good, okay?”, you leaned back into the couch as she pushed you back with one arm and moved herself to an angle that would work, your legs apart then, her hand grazing your cunt through the soaked fabric.

she breathed even heavier then, feeling the effect she had on you, her fingers cold against the heat of your core, the contrast making you dizzy for a moment, shaking slightly, already sighing just from that, she cooed at you “it´s okay” as her fingers made direct contact with your cunt, her fingers sliding between your aroused lips, a moan almost leaving her as she felt your juices covering her skin, slick with it within one second, hearing you whine a little as she moved her fingers up and down, not even thinking about your pleasure for a second but her own, the thrill of having a pretty girl claim her in that sense, covering her in wetness, already fantasizing about getting her whole face up in it, tasting you. 

the thought pushed her to add more pressure to her movements, the passion taking her over, fully, moving her fingers to your clit then, sensing it was the right thing because you were louder then, shaking almost, clinging to her, “fuck…don´t stop, please” tumbled out of your mouth as she drew circles over the sensitive spot, she felt your hips pushing upwards, her eyes back on your face then, watching you come undone, her chest swelling with the pleasure of knowing it was her doing: your eyes shut, your lips parted. “you´re so fucking pretty” she whispered while feeling your cunt practically dripping onto her hand, the words pushing you towards your orgasm even faster, she could tell you were close, so she leaned down a little, facing you, pinning you to the couch as she kept teasing your clit.

the thing that got you more turned on than you ever remembered being, was the her movements were not erratic or too fast, but secure and skilled, hard but not aggressive, a slow sensuality to it that was so powerful that you whole body burned with the sensation, “fuck, I´m-” you couldn´t even from the whole sentence but she knew what you were trying to say, “just let go sweetie, cum for me”, encouraging you to cum against her hand, which you did, a violent shudder going through you as you arched up against her hand one last time, and what killed you then was the even as you came down from the climax, she was still watching you, still touching you, so drunk on the feeling of your cum all over her fingers that she just couldn´t let go before you were truly finished.

you slumped back against the couch as she got up from on top of you and sat down next to you, also a little spent, leaning back. once you were coherent again, you looked over at her, exhausted but face glowing, she turned to face you, pleased to see you smile, “god that felt good..” you said, still high on endorphins, resting your hand on her leg, she laced her fingers between yours, “yeah. it did”, making sure you knew that got just as much out of it.

“did you call me pretty or did I imagine that?” you asked, smiling at her, she grinned, realizing that you were the type to really crave praise but not ask for it explicitly, “I´ll say it again, you´re very pretty”, her voice low and sultry, a satisfied look to you. she just said what she was thinking before she could change her mind, “do you wanna stay here tonight? you can sleep over if you want, it´s late” you sat upright then, moving over to her side of the couch, getting up in her space again, hand on her chest, “yeah I´d like that”, an enthusiasm to your expression that made her happy, “okay good. we´ll have to share a blanket though” she said, you laughed then, “I can handle that I think”.

you´d already showered and changed into comfortable clothes before you came over, so she told you to just get comfortable on whatever side of the bed you wanted, while she´d go freshen up. her bedroom was similar to her living room, minimal decor, but comfortable, warm, a few of her clothes over a chair in the corner, a wooden bedside table with a few books, a small lamp, a lighter, a candle, the bedspread a soft creme color, the window half concealed by dark curtains. it somehow smelled like her, slightly fresh, slightly woody, a hint of musk in there too. at first you didn´t even want to touch anything, feeling like a kind of intruder, but the second you sat down on the right side of the bed it was too soft and relaxing not to give in and get comfortable. 

you were leaned against the headboard, still high on the feeling of her all over you, taking the room in, stretching your legs out, your hands running over the fabric of the sheets.

a few minutes later Tess she came into the room, her hair slightly damp, face fresh and glowing, dressed in a t-shirt and underwear. you were glad to see that she was already fine with you seeing her like that, even though you hadn´t seen her naked yet. 

your gaze wandered to her strong thighs as she walked over to her wardrobe and got out a pair of sweatpants, she smiled to herself, feeling your attention even though she had her back turned to you, “you´re staring” she said, her voice giving away that she enjoyed it, “I know” you responded, which made her laugh and turn around to look at you.

you didn´t even bother to pretend, you were still clearly checking her out as she got dressed, “I think I deserve something in return for that” she said as she walked over to her side of the bed and got onto the covers with you, eyeing you from the side, “yeah like what?”, she smiled, pulling you closer in one swift motion, her hand finding the bare skin of your thighs under the fabric, squeezing a little, just taking in the feeling of your soft skin, you were face to face, and your grin gave away that she could do pretty much whatever she wanted to you, “if you want me to undress I can do that you know”, you teased, she shook her head, “no, this is good, I like having something to look forward to”, that was the charming way of putting it, Tess also could´ve said we can´t fuck right now because we´re both tired and I´ll need the first time of getting a taste of you to last as long as possible. 

you blushed a little then, your hand in her hair, taking in the sight of her outside of her usual guarded physicality, all sweet and affectionate, relaxed, hand under her shirt, on her back, it was surprising to you, that nothing you did, no amount of touching her, seemed to be too much at all, even though she was not a hugger, not a person for handshakes even, so it made you feel free in your greediness for her.

 you spent a short while just laying there, half entwined, the sleepiness adding to the slow tenderness of the moment, she seemed mesmerized as her hand wandered further up your body, pushing your shirt up a little to trace your side with her fingers, you leaned in to kiss her, pulling her closer by the neck, Tess pulling your lower side close hers with the grip she had on your waist. you were dizzy from the warm sensation of her lips, her skin, your leg over hers, the way she immediately kissed you back with a need she couldn´t hide, eliciting a few low sounds of pleasure from you, you only parted once you both needed air, “come on” she said, she motioned for you to get under the covers with her, the room a little too cold to stay like that for long.

the moment you were under the blanket a shyness returned, the intimacy of truly being in bed with her like that suddenly making you hesitant to move, which she saw, and it amused her, that this girl who had no issue firing a gun, beating people up if needed, dealing godless amounts of drugs, suddenly seemed unable to just take up the personal space of a woman who was very clearly into her. the contrast charmed her, made her realize that she had a good amount of power over you but the good kind, the kind that allowed her to make you feel safe, free to show your more vulnerable self for once.

she smiled at you, “so, you wanna stay on your side or?...” 

you realized she was teasing a little, sensing your apprehension, it made you remember there was no need to be hesitant at all, so you shook your head, smiling back at her, “well come here then”. she opened her arms, gesturing for you to lay down on her however you wanted, which you did. you moved over and it felt so natural, to just lay your head on her chest and rest your arm on her stomach, everything about it felt like you´d done it before, the way Tess´s hand immediately found its way to your hair, running her fingers through it, softly, the repeated rhythm of it immediately putting you at ease, the feeling of your face against her chest reminding her how much she´d craved it all along, to feel useful, needed, to feel like her presence was actually making a difference to someone who deserved it. 

“that feels nice” you whispered, your voice sleepy at that point, your body slack against hers, she ruffled your hair a little, feeling you lean into her hand, moving it down to caress your cheek, both of you slowly dozing off, so she reached over and switched off the small light that was still on, letting you stay on top of her, soothed by your weight on top of her. usually she had a hard time falling asleep, but it was impossible to stay awake any longer, you were both too comfortable.

when you woke up a few hours later in the dead of night, you realized that you´d moved over to your own side in your sleep, and when you realized that you were too awake to drift off again, you rolled over to watch Tess, who was sort of facing you in her sleep. she looked graceful, her mouth was closed, her cheeks were a little flushed, her hair spread out over the pillow, you just laid there admiring her.

she stirred a few moments later but you couldn´t be bothered to turn away and pretend you weren´t looking, so when she opened her eyes a little, you heard her say in a raspy quiet voice “are you watching me sleep?”, you smiled, “maybe”, she shook her head a little, clearly still half asleep, you added “you´re a pretty sleeper”, a sly grin on your face, “you don´t have to suck up to me, I already like you”, Tess uttered, witty even while she wasn´t fully conscious, you protested, “I mean it”, she had her eyes closed but spoke again, “that´s very charming but you should sleep instead”, “I tried” you said. 

the liminal quality of that moment, the almost dreamlike air, made it easy for Tess to have no issue doing what she did next: she tapped you on the side of your body that was facing her “turn around”, telling you to get on your side and face away from her, “let´s try this”, she said, pulling you closer by wrapping her arm around you and getting into a big spoon type position, her chest pressed against your back then, her arm around your waist, and she was right to guess that it would help, her warmth immediately made your eyes feel heavy again, the sensation too good not to just melt into and lose yourself in. you put your hand over hers, and within about ten minutes you were both sound asleep again.

the next morning, it took you a moment to come to your senses and realize where you were, but the second you did, an unfamiliar thing happened: you were flooded with joy instead of dread. usually mornings were your least favorite part of the day, the things you had to do looming ahead of you, but as you saw the sun coming into Tess´s room, you felt at peace, content. the space next to you was empty and you could hear Tess moving around in the kitchen, so you got up, went to the bathroom to splash some water on your face, and walked to the kitchen. since you weren´t wearing shoes she didn´t hear you come in, so you just stood there watching her from across the room, smiling, until she turned around, “well, hello there” she said, unable to hide the obvious pure joy she felt at seeing you. 

it had been a long time since Tess had dated or even hooked up with anyone, let alone let someone stay over, so every little detail of being with you gave her a rush, the sight of you leaning against the wall with your face still a little scrunched up from sleep was enough to make her feel warm all over, so she was almost scared of what it would feel like once you´d actually do something explicitly romantic for her. somehow you both knew it without saying, that you were about to spend a lot of time together, that you were both in need of much more than just one night. Tess wasn´t thinking as far as being your girlfriend yet, but part of her hoped, part of her did love the idea of finally being devoted to someone the way she always wanted to be.

she waved you over to where she was standing, setting a cup of coffee down on the counter, “perfect timing, I just got done with this” she put down some sugar too in case you wanted it. you approached her, almost a little shy, knowing she was seeing you in a rather personal light then, having barely been awake for more than five minutes, but she was clearly enamored by it. you gratefully took the cup and warmed your hands against it, taking a sip, leaning against over counter, looking at her, feeling her gaze on you the entire time. it was almost too good to be true, normally your entire day was spent in a haze where nobody could reach you, and there she was, disrupting it, again and again, making you come back to life just by being there.

“you could have woken me up, you know” you said, but she just shook her head, “no fucking way, I was glad you were sleeping so well” a grin that gave away she knew it was partly thanks to her, you nodded, your face muscles almost hurting from having been frozen in a permanent smile for the past few minutes, “yeah I do feel much better than yesterday. I wonder why that is” you said while taking her hand.

she tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, eyeing you, “is there anything you need to do today?” she asked, praying the answer was no, you shook your head, “no, nothing until Monday. you?” hoping for the same answer, she thought for a moment “well, nothing I couldn´t put off for a day or two” a faint smile, you got up then, walking over to her, putting your arms around her neck,“put it off then” you said, before leaning in to tenderly kiss her cheek, her neck, whispering against her skin “please stay here Tess. please”, your voice dripping with sweetness, her breathing changed as she felt you all over her skin, she thought of course this girl is clever enough to know what begging does to me, her hands on your back then, under your shirt, “okay, I´m not going anywhere” she said, and of course she wouldn´t, she already knew that before your act of persuasion, but she liked seeing you try to convince her.

“I think we should go back to bed” you declared, staring at her, a boldness that came out of nowhere but felt exactly right, she grinned, her hands on your waist, pulling you close, “you think so, yeah?”, you just looked at her, words were unnecessary, your hunger for her apparent in your gaze, Tess felt her face growing hot. it was one thing that you´d wanted her when you were weak and exhausted and needed comfort, it was another that you also wanted her when you were well rested and fine and could´ve thought of other things to start your day with, but apparently still only had her on your mind. “let´s get you out of these then, hm” she said, tugging at your clothes, your eyes sparkling up at her before she took your hand and lead you back to her room.

as she pulled off your shirt and started kissing your chest, you had that same feeling again that you´d had years ago: despite all the pain, the darkness that had seeped into your life at times, you knew in that moment how lucky you were that someone like Tess had paid attention to you in exact right moment, that she did not just help you, but made you come alive again. 

finally, you found yourself not wanting to escape your body anymore, finally you were happy to be fully present, trying your best to soak up every little detail, the feeling of the sun spilling in, of being undressed by Tess, being admired, held by her.

it seemed like divine intervention to you, that Tess had come into your life right when you needed her the most. 

#tess servopoulos #tess servopoulos x reader #the last of us x reader #tlou #the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #anna torv #I’m thinking about also writing some shorter/smuttier stuff for her bc I have a few ideas for that #but for now heres this

[sam-glade]

Writeblr Intro

Hi! My name is Sam (they/them), and I write SFF.

About me:

I'm queer, in my late 20s, and I live in Europe.

Pets? Two cats + 1 orange braincell

Favourite food? Please don't make me choose.

What I write? Hard fantasy with excessive worldbuilding

Favourite books? The Silmarillion by JRR Tolkien. The Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson. The Traitor by Seth Dickinson. Red Rising by Pierce Brown. Uprooted by Naomi Novik.

Fiction I probably won't enjoy? Romance. Middle grade. Most High School YA. It's just not my cup of tea.

Outside of writing? I'm a mathematician-turned-programmer who wishes they've gone into a more creative career

Silmarillion blog: @ward-of-irmo

Personal blog: @careening-mind

Read all the snippets I've posted under this tag.

DMs/Asks/Tag games? Yes, please

This blog is a mix of things related to my writing, from snippets, through info dumps, to historical trivia and inspirations for the setting. Also, cats.

I'm happy to do beta swaps.

About my writing:

Expect themes of found family, battling inner demons, finding one's identity and strength. But also, superpowered sword fights and epic locations. Don't expect romance front and centre, and don't expect characters who are minors. Most of my characters are openly queer; I enjoy seeing people I can identify with partake in fantasy adventures, without their identities being a burden.

I write multi-POV stories, 3rd person only. I'm not that keen on seemingly unrelated POVs coming together, but I love seeing group interactions through the eyes of a different person each time.

I like turning 'what if' questions into stories - what if the Chosen One was chosen by the villain? What if a Bronze Age civilisation experienced a first contact with an alien race? What would crime-scene investigation look like in a setting where people turn to dust upon death? I also love learning, and I learn by researching random areas that are tangentially related to my writing projects.

Are my fantasy settings too realistic? Maybe. Am I having fun writing it? Definitely.

About my WIPS:

The Sunblessed Realm

Hard fantasy, queernorm setting inspired by Slavic folklore and the history of Central-Eastern Europe. The age of heroes has passed. The heroes remain alive.

A list of all stories and longer snippets in this setting that I've posted.

Days of Dusk trilogy [Tag]

Swords used to be the protectors of the world, channelling the power of the Elements to fight against the Primeval Darkness. Now that the threat is contained, they are perceived as a danger themselves. Their powers are feared, while any advantages they can give are made up for with developments in science.

Info dump posts: Map || Magic system || Fashion || Architecture || Cast

⚔️Gifts of Fate ⚔️

Intro post || [Tag]

The Witcher x Fullmetal Alchemist

Genre: NA hard fantasy

Pitch: The hero was chosen by the villain to become might incarnate. With all due respect, he'd like to decline.

Expect gratuitous superpowered HEMA fight scenes mixed with fridge horror.

Progress: First Draft done at 107k, beta readers' feedback received

⚔️The Prince's Shadow⚔️

Intro post || [Tag]

NA military fantasy.

The hero of the first instalment was deemed to dangerous to live or be killed. The Army's spymaster and the Chief Strategist set him up to die a hero's death.

Note: This was the first story I've written in this setting, with the pitch being 'the hero has just saved the world and needs to figure out what to do with his life'. It has evolved a fair bit since then.

Progress: Needs rewriting, now that the prequel is written.

⚔️Prodigal Children⚔️

[Tag]

Political fantasy.

The last - the only - war fought by Swords took place two millennia ago, and the memory of its horrors kept the princes motivated to stop it from happening ever again. When an uprising in one of the princedoms spills over the borders, it again becomes a real threat.

Now with more intrigue and sapphic romance.

Progress: First Draft done at 128k

To do: I've got feedback to incorporate

The Truth Teller [Tag]

Intro post

Urban fantasy version of the Eastern Bloc.

Three thousand years later, the heroes of the previous stories have passed into legends. There are no more Swords to protect, Crystals to heal, or Elemental Dancers to mend and build. There are only Knacked, shunned by the society.

Progress: Outline done, writing started.

Other

The Fulcrum

First Contact Sci-Fi from the point of view of the alien species. While their civilisation is comparable to early Iron Age ones on Earth, don't worry, they have nukes.

Progress: First Draft - 24k/100k

To do: more research

#writeblr #writeblr intro #writing #writers of tumblr #writeblr community

[humansofnewyork]

(4/13) “The first place they took me was MCC in New York. Same floor Epstein killed himself. When they closed the door of that cell, I remember looking at the graffiti all over the walls. Grime everywhere. Hair on the floor a quarter inch deep. And sitting in the middle of the floor was two sheets and a blanket. I didn’t have the meth anymore. It was just me, those sheets, and that mess. I spent all my time imagining what it would be like to die in prison. Every little cold, every little stomachache, I thought: This is it. And what kind of death would that be? Everyone wants to die with dignity. But there was no dignity here. I didn’t tell a soul about my diagnosis. Show vulnerability, in this place? I’m no dummy. But the guards knew, because they had a list with a code next to my name. They kept making little innuendos. Fucking infuriating. I didn’t even talk about my diagnosis with the phlebotomist who checked my blood. But one day we’re in there alone, and I finally got the courage to ask him: ‘What do you think? Will I make it out of here alive?’ I’ll never forget him; his name was Alex. He said: ‘With the new drugs now, you’ll live longer than the rest of these clowns.’ It was my first glimpse of hope in six years, but it came too late. When you’re in prison: you might as well be dead. You’re in a coma. You’re not making new memories. You wouldn’t even know time was passing if it wasn’t for the 13th of every month, when your phone minutes reset. My first call was always to my mother. It was an ebb and flow. Most days she was upbeat. Other days it was: ‘Why? Why? Why?’ But she never left my side. Sent me a letter every week. Visited whenever she could. My father never came to see me, but I didn’t take it personal. He didn’t come to my baseball games either. Sometimes my Mom would hand him the phone, and he’d say: ‘I’m not giving up on you.’ That was it; it’s just who he was. He was an old school onion farmer. If you wanted to get a beer after work, and stare at the Eagles game on TV, he’d be there. But ‘I love you?’ Nah, none of that. That was Mom. Supposedly he changed after I went to prison, and I’m happy for that. I really am. But I never got to see it.”

[slowips]

controlling chaos

# KAVEH X READER, 600 words. fake dating (guilty as charged), alcohol and hangovers.

⁕ title given by @isekyaaa for ask games (title edition). was inspired by the kaveh discussion we had :3 (and yes, i haven’t forgotten the titles you gave me!)

.　⁺ . 　 ˚　✦　.　　+ ⁺　 　 . ✦

if there’s one thing you need to get straight is that you’re not kaveh’s friend.

too often your network approaches you in hopes to connect with the renowned architect rather than ask for your services—you have school debts to pay!—and they eagerly hobnob with you only to declare you’ve scammed them when they find out you don’t know where kaveh stays.

he’s definitely not in his old house because that’s where you live.

alone.

you thought your middleman role was temporary. once word got out you weren’t affiliated to that man other than occupying his past residence, they would stop—and it did.

then one day, you stumbled on the fabled man, drunk in puspa cafe. he was slurring and moving silly. despite being the cause of your irritation, when you sat across from him to give him a earful, the words he said left you stumped.

“i have no place to go…”

the rights of the house was legally transferred to you, yet his pitiful state and mumbled confession left you helpless. you dragged him back to your house.

most of his items were left behind, and you laid him on the bed you assumed he slept in, hoping the familiarity will be of any comfort as you rested on the couch.

the next day, while in his hangover, groaning and vomiting as you pushed his hair away from his face, he revealed his current house so you could bring him back.

and your worse nightmare comes back alive, teeth and claws sharpened.

tabloids present pictures of you and him, the accompanying headlines accuses you of having a secret relationship with the man you denied knowing.

your network insists you’re keeping “your boyfriend” all to yourself. they can have this idiotic man to themselves for all you care!

(you don’t even know what’s his favourite colour!)

but every time you’re about to blurt his address, the scene of him slouching on the table, half-filled wine glass in one hand, and the way his eyes felt so… burnt—as if he was burning himself as fuel—appears in your mind.

you’ll meekly smile, trying your best to rewrite the narrative through other means. kaveh kept it a secret for a reason, and a toddler can connect the dots to know this reason is linked to how burdened he looks at the bar.

tired and aghast of another failed week, you march up to the grand scribe’s house. the tabloids recently shared that you argued with him hence why he isn’t staying in your house anymore. you had enough. why isn’t kaveh doing anything? it feels like you’re the only one fighting against the allegations.

before you can knock, the door opens.

“i was expecting you,” alhaitham says after his greeting. “you’re here to pick kaveh up, right?”

“not you too…” you groan. this was getting uncomfortable. your parents are starting to ask you to bring kaveh back home over the new years, and that’s the last thing you want. “look, i’m in no way related to kaveh. it was just that one night, and i’d rather much live a life without him—”

alhaitham sighs, then emits an amused huff.

alhaitham… showing expression? you make distance between you and him, unsure what to make of it. this isn’t the grand scribe you see at the library reading one of the most brutal books ever known in teyvat without a single flinch.

“come in, we have to discuss.”

when he pulls the door back, it reveals the culprit of your demise leaning against the table in the middle of the living room. he has his arms folded, face scrunched in worry, but when he sees you, he smiles as if you’re his saviour.

you swallow. there are a thousand ways this can go, but your gut is telling you that you’ll walk out of this door with kaveh, and your house wouldn’t be as empty.

#kaveh x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #kaveh x you #kaveh x y/n #genshin x you #genshin x y/n #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x y/n #x reader #reader insert #ask game: titles

[hoedorokishoto]

Random HC's for what some of the KNB Boys wear to bed 💤💕

I would like to preface this by saying these are all headcanon's that popped into my brain intermittently over the course of the day, so enjoy... yes KNB is on my mind 24/7

Shintaro Midorima

So hear me out, I have no evidence to back it up but I 100% believe it in my soul to be true.

This man sleeps 100% naked, always. Excluding basketball and school trips of course.

It all started in Middle School when he kept yawning at practice on day and Aomine caught on and said something along the lines of being too restricted while sleeping. If he just let it all hang loose he would sleep way better "take it from me Midorima"

Because side note, Daiki gets home and strips, regardless of who is there.

After calling Aomine a neanderthal and everything else he could think of under the sun he left and put his lack of sleep down to school stress. Sure to pass after exams.

That was until exams did finish and he was tossing and turning still. His sleep restless. His long limbs flailing around the bed as he moved and tried to get comfortable.

Seeing no end in sight he huffed and did the last thing he ever thought he would do, stripped down to nothing. Getting naked as the day he was born before getting back in bed and laying down.

Sleep finding him surprisingly quick, his eyes shutting as soon as his head hit the pillow.

He hasn't worn clothes to sleep ever since.

I also think that one day his mother came into his room to wake him and got the fright of her life. Both the Midorima's in shock and silence. Without another word she turned around and left. Didn't say a single thing about it and for weeks after whenever they passed each other would just communicate in one word sentences like "Shin" to which he would respond "Mother" and not another word is said.

Daiki Aomine

So to continue with this menace of a man, as previously stated he also sleeps naked.

But isn't even going to try and hide it.

As soon as he gets home he takes off his shoes and clothes and just wears underwear around the house, plopping down on the couch to watch whatever basketball game happened to be on at the time.

He goes straight from the bath or shower into his bedroom and has the towel slung over his shoulder keeping water from dripping down his body.

His parents thought it was cute when he was young and then when he got older tried to get to to at least wear a robe or something but to no avail.

His argument being "I don't know how you can have a problem with it. You made me."

Eventually they just gave up and turned a blind eye. They are now so numb to it that they just have dinner with a half naked Daiki at one end of the table.

Atsushi Murasakibara

110% has different coloured onsies.

Another head canon that has no evidence to back it up but I will go down fighting about it.

Mind you they are custom made, his family getting him one every big holiday and at the start of every school term. Just because he grows so much and has hulked out of so many.

He isn't ashamed either. If the Yosen boys are having a movie night, catch him there in a onsie with a tail. He needs to be comfy while eating snacks and the boys never say anything because really who are they to judge.

Once accidentally washed one with Tatsuya's pristine white sleep shirts and made them all turn various shades of red and pink.

His team mate not being very impressed as they were bulk ordered from some place in America and i quote "were like sleeping on a cloud."

The titan did feel bad and offered him something to sleep in, the raven haired boy being all but swallowed alive in a black and white panda onsie. Some of the fabric dragging along the ground like a train.

Seijuro Akashi

When I close my eyes I can picture Seijuro waking up in a penthouse apartment.

Slipping out of bed and walking over to the open windows, looking out over the city as his butler brings him his coffee.

He slips his hand into the pocket of his long, silk sleep pants and watches the hustle and bustle of the city below.

He prefers the long pants and no shirt in the warmer months and long pants and a t-shirt in a matching colour in the colder months.

I don't have much to say except just clothes your eyes and picture him like I just mentioned... one word. Magnificent. *chef's kiss*

#knb headcanons #knb hcs #kuroko no basket #kuroko no basuke #akashi seijuro #shintaro midorima #daiki aomine #atsushi murasakibara #generation of miracles #knb

[usamamoweek2024]

UsaMamo Week 2023 - Master Post

Thank you to everyone who participated, reblogged, commented, liked and gave kudos. Thank you to everyone who was a beta / cheerleader behind the scenes. This event turned out amazingly well and we are so happy to see both new faces and some old friends participate this year. (And don't forget about our "Meet the Creators" series, to learn a little more about people in this fandom)

To make sure none of the amazing works that have been created for this UsaMamo Week have been missed, we have compiled them all into this master post (in alphabetical order by the creator):

Stories:

@caelenath - UsaMamo Week 2023 - Day 4: Beach

The whole situation was any red-blooded man's dream—nine gorgeous women in swimwear, a dreamy sunset, and a legitimate excuse to ogle them from every angle.

But he had eyes for only one...

@daikon1 :

Moon Sake Bottle Action!

Somehow at a houseparty with Usagi, Mamoru feels totally out of his depth - until Minako suggests they liven things up a bit. But can an unusual talent for carnival games be leveraged into a kiss with his crush??

A Royal Audience

Once upon a time, there was an extremely self-centered mentor...

Ten Ways to Say 'I Love You'

A portrait of Usagi and Mamoru’s relationship over the years, told in letters, poems, and journal entries.

There Was Only One... Stowaway on the School Beach Trip

It was the perfect summer scheme... and then Mamoru had walked into the train compartment.

Mamoru's Anxiety: A Love Letter for Usagi!

Filling in a 'missing scene' from Usagi's Joy: A Love Letter From Tuxedo Mask - What does Mamoru think about Usagi receiving a love letter from his alter-ego?

Keyrings, and Chaos, and Gender Expectations, Oh My!

Galaxia may have been defeated, but the patriarchy is still alive and well. With some help from Sailor Moon, Mamoru has a few things to say about that!!

Fe(e)line

As Tsukino Usagi awoke one morning from pleasant dreams, she found herself transformed in her bed into an adorable kitty.

@goddessalthena :

Dear Mamo-chan

"I'll write. And I'll call," he promised. "So...I expect you to write me all the time."

"...I will," she vowed.

But only one of them kept their word.

Picture Perfect

It was a perfect day. Almost too good to be true.

Usagi & Mamoru share a few firsts as they bask in the first blush of young love.

@kaitoscarlett - The words I couldn't say

After their first night together, Usagi finds herself waking up alone in Mamoru's apartment. While waiting for him, she explores his book shelf and finds something, she probably shouldn't read.

@lilliebellfanfics :

Day 1: Kiss Game

Summary: Usagi and Mamoru are chosen as the next contestants in Minako's pop-up competitions. They expect something weird and zany like the previous ones... not a kissing game. Well, kissing or not, Usagi says bring it on.

Day 4: There was only one...

Usagi's investigating a series of energy bursts at Tokyo Dome City amusement park. With so many unknowns--what was the source of the energy? Was it Zoisite or a new enemy?--the last thing she wants to do is share a ride on the Ferris wheel with Mamoru.

Day 7: Midnight / Fireworks

"One thing I love about prompts is they get me writing for my WIPs! I bring you another scene from DFD, but this is much much later than the current arc. For reasons, Usagi ends up staying at Mamoru's place. Things get hot & steamy, and here's a scene from somewhere in the middle."

Day 5: Free Day

The Tsukino clan are about to hit the slopes as the next part of their winter competition. Usagi is a clear winner and she's excited to beat Shingo on the double black diamond and win points for her team... only Mamoru's never skied before. Shit.

(Also Christmas Markets and kissing)

@master-ray5 - Lips Of An Angel

Mamoru gets a call on his lunch break from his Ex in Japan.

@random-mailbox - Love Letter (Poem)

Poem inspired by the Stars arc in the Anime

@riverlethe - Game Night

Minako organizes (by throwing together at the very last minute) Game Night to help the senshi blow off some steam on a rare night off.

Rei picked a small red box up off the table. “‘Love Letter’?” she grimaced. “This is going to be a long night, isn’t it?”

@sailormoonandme - Year of the Rabbit. UsaMamo Week 2023

Unbeknownst to anyone else, Serenity and Endymion arrange a secret rendezvous on the beach. Manga Canon.

@speak-mnemosyne1 :

Trust

In a dark, cramped space with stifling air, something in the chemistry between two people transformed. The universe fell away and, in those seven minutes, actions had no consequences.

But this.. this felt more like Seven Minutes in Hell.

Magnolias

For the prince of Earth, there was only one girl in the entire Solar System with whom falling in love was forbidden..

Present

“Just for a year… but I may end up staying longer than that.” Mamoru tried to swallow back the words as they left his mouth. He hated lying to Usagi, hated the way her blue eyes looked up at him with oceans of love.

@spei-sidus :

Lucky Bunny

Day 1: Year of the Rabbit / Kiss Game

Forgiven

Sailor Moon is forgiven by Tuxedo Kamen for Serenity's final actions

An Ode to the Rose

Valentine's Day is coming up and the girls decide, since they weren't giving chocolates to anyone, to write love letters to give to their future boyfriends.

The Binoculars

A day at the beach leads Mamoru to ask Usagi out.

Free Day

Neo Queen Serenity goes back in time to go on a date with First Season Mamoru.

Like a Fairy

An injured Usagi leads the nijizuishou to not only replenish her energy, but also form the Ginzuishou.

Moonlight Musings

Some midnight musings for our roaming heroine.

@wishwars - Confessions Left Unsaid

At the end of Season 1, Episode 3 of the 90s anime, Usagi decides to write a love letter to Tuxedo Mask. What if Mamoru reads it?

Art:

@iiyasbssmdoodles - Day 6 - wings

@iamcharlotte88 - Three Levels of Kisses for Mamoru Chiba (artwork for @daikon1 Moon Sake Bottle Action! story)

@lilliebellfanfics - Day 2: Royalty, Day 3: Love Letters / Poetry

@mhanevision - Day 2 Royalty , Day 5 - Free Day "Barbenheimer" , Day 7 - Midnight (Happy Birthday Mamo-Chan , Day 1 - Year of the Rabbit (Happy Birthday Usako)

@mochibuni - Art for Epilogue (story Rocks in Space by @vchanny-og )

Images / Mood boards:

@random-mailbox - Day 1 - Year of the Rabbit , Day 1 - Kiss Game, Week Day 2 - Royalty, Day 2 - Sword, Day 3 - Love Letters / Poetry, Day 4 - Beach, Day 4 - There was only one..., Day 5 - Free Day , Day 6 - Wings , Day 6 - Crystal, Day 7 - Midnight, Day 7 - Fireworks

Podcasts:

@oshiokiyopod - UsaMamo Week 2023 Special Episode!

You can listen to the episode on Spotify, Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts, Pocket Cast, and Podchaser (links to show pages in the platform names).

#usamamoweek2023 #usagi x mamoru #usamamo #sailor moon #masterpost #sailor moon fanart #sailor moon fanfiction

[starpirateee]

Ohhh I love a character study, and I LOVE Keith and Scrags, so... Let's call this one fair game!

“Please… Just leave me alone.”

Those five words caused the start of everything. When the last of the footsteps faded off into the distance, leaving him with the slowly growing patch of mud on his knees, that was just the start. Benji Scragtowski- awkward, sensitive Benji- had just been left alone. Without his best friend, or any of his friends, for that matter. When he asked, they gave him space, but he never asked for them back, and so they never came.

He was fourteen, at the time. They were already in high school. At this point, everyone already had their friendship groups. That’s why he spent a good portion of the remaining half of the year completely alone.

Keith would talk to anyone, and because he managed to insert himself into that many social situations just by being himself, he had good, solid friends in a matter of days. Gwen had never had a problem, not even when it was just the four of them. She had a whole network of fallback options, and within a few weeks, it was like she’d never had a part in the squad at all. Esther had appeared to get used to their life alone, but even they ended up with a small clique of their own after a few months.

But Scrags should’ve seen this coming. He was a loner before the squad, it seemed only right that he would continue to be a loner after they broke up. At least Esther was kind enough to acknowledge his presence once in a while. That was something. 

He finished that year still reeling about what had happened. In the space of what was really only a few hours, he’d literally lost everything he’d built up over years. The four of them were supposed to be cool together, at least until the natural end of it all, when they weren’t kids anymore. The problem with that was that they still were. So the ending wasn’t natural, no matter how much the others wanted to pretend like it was. Sometimes, his mother would ask him how his friends were. He didn’t have the heart to tell her they all disappeared when Cluebert did.

All he had left of the life he used to have was the element of mystery. It’s what kept things exciting, knowing that there was so much out there that he just couldn’t understand, it still intrigued him as much as it always had. Even if he’d lost a bit of the spark for it, and most of his entire motive for pursuing it had gone, there was still nothing that interested him more.

That notion carried him all the way through high school, when he decided that, if that was really something he was serious about, then he may as well make a career out of it. And he really wanted to continue this dip into that kind of life as much as he could.

The criminal justice course he’d chosen out in the middle of nowhere wasn’t quite the excitement he’d promised himself, but the day he got accepted into the FBI made all of that a little more worth it.

He was twenty-three. Benji Scragtowski- studious, hard-working Benji- finally had prospects, a real job, and a chance at being happy again.

What he still didn’t have was a best friend. Connections, sure, and people he would consider “friends” in varying degrees of the word, but nothing concrete. He had to let go of the past at some point, but that was an impossible ask for someone like him.

 

–

 

Keith had never been particularly observant by any means, but he found himself guiltily watching Scrags after the squad broke up. He was the last to leave him behind, sparing enough glances behind him to tell him he really didn’t want to let this thing go. Part of him wanted Scrags to catch his eye, but the opportunity came and went, and Scrags didn’t look at him once.

He thought he had three people he could confide in about the rather catastrophic death of Cluebert, but the truth of the matter was that Keith had been a coward. He’d never mentioned the fact that he didn’t actually care whether Cluebert was alive or not.

When everyone left, he was fifteen. Keith Swanson- brash, overconfident Keith- Had managed to wreck everything he had and couldn’t even admit to his mistakes. There had never been more of a worse friend in the history of the world.

After beating himself up over that for a while, he decided that the best course of action was just to distance himself as much as possible, and hopefully the feeling would go away. That, or Scrags’ grief would fade out enough that the two of them could reconnect, without having to bring those old scars back to the surface.

That never happened.

By the end of sophomore year, he’d been accepted into a small network of people, but none of them were really close friend material. Not as much as Scrags had been, anyway. Besides his crush on Gwen that lasted him throughout the entire duration of the squad itself, he’d always been the closest to Scrags. The two of them were on a certain level that he just couldn’t reach with the others, and that brought them closer.

At least, in his eyes.

Maybe that wasn’t the case for Scrags… After all, he’d not chosen to make a move to salvage the friendship they had. Neither of them did. And Keith had to be honest with himself, it probably looked like he’d moved on way too much. Like he’d gotten way too comfortable with this new life. Like he’d let go.

It got to the point where the only time he saw him was in passing periods. He’d grown up a lot, seemingly different every time Keith saw him. In only a year, Scrags became a completely changed person. Way taller, way more reserved… Keith couldn’t help but wonder whether things would’ve been a little different if they had stayed together.

One thing he was admittedly happy to let go of was the whole mystery shtick the four of them had going on. He could never get his head around it, it was always just a matter of getting things done and moving onto the next thing. For him, that was always how things had been, a constant need to move on to the next thing.

He wasn’t going to college, he’d decided that a long time ago, but he started overhearing more and more people talking about their options. All he knew for certain was that he needed to get out of Mayberry.

“Hey Keith, you were friends with that guy Scragtowski, weren’t you?”

Keith nodded, sure of that much at least. People talking about their options and where they were going from high school had made him feel a little uneasy for reasons completely unknown to him, but the mention of Scrags did nothing but make that feeling worse. “Sure. Why?”

“Heard he’s going to do some criminal course or whatever, all the way out in Boston!”

Boston?

Keith felt his face fall. If Scrags was all the way out in Boston, then there was never going to be another chance to speak to him, to try and make things right.

And there never was.

Years passed, and Keith’s plan of not knowing what he was doing paid off just fine. It was perfectly normal for a twenty-four year old man to have no kind of future, or friends, or any kind of life... Right?

... Right?

#the solve it squad #benji scragtowski #keith swanson #tw death #void offering #nova's tags → #not... the first time ive written keith and scrags #i love them okay??

[quiet-nocturne]

Thank you to @memesmadefullmetal for the tag!

are you named after anyone? not my first name - but my middle name comes from the name of a children's hospital that kept me alive when I was born, even though I was super premature. It makes sense as a name though, trust me. My mother was not insane haha.

when was the last time you cried? hmmm, a couple weeks ago? I also full-on bawled for like 20 minutes while reading the end of a novel about a month back lmao, which has never happened before.

do you have kids? nope, only three fur babies. 🐈

do you use sarcasm a lot? definitely.

what sports do you play? none. I like sitting, comfy clothes and video games. 💀 if I do any fitness, it's walking, ring fit adventure or just dance lol.

what’s the first thing you notice about people? just the general aura they put off - usually I'm right about a first impression. I can tell if I'll get along with someone pretty quickly.

what’s your eye color? brown

scary movies or happy endings? depends on my mood (I can go for a good scary movie), but probably a happy ending overall. I'm a sap lol.

any special talents? uhhh I can play a lot of instruments, and sometimes I type and whole stories with pretty cool prose comes out. 🤷‍♀️

where were you born? canada! 🇨🇦

what are your hobbies? listening to music, video games, writing, reading, textiles or sewing of any kind, watercolor painting, tv shows/movies, obsessing over fma, petting a cat, etc.

do you have any pets? yep, 3 cats!

how tall are you? 5"2 ahaha. 🙃 i can reach things on the BOTTOM shelf. ✨💪

favorite subject in school? Music. I have 2 degrees in it, and now I no longer work in it. oops haha.

dream job? honestly, to own/run a cat rescue. that would be so sweet. unfortunately currently I work in retail.

tagging (no pressure!): @rizaposting, @lewdybooty, @aicasey 💖

#tag game #personal #not me posting this at 2:30am 💀 #i had an energy drink earlier and now i can't sleep

[sirensorisons]

i can't believe it's finally happening.

in early 2012, i picked the hunger games up off the shelf at my school library on a whim. my eldest sister hates reading, but i remembered that this was one of the few books she'd actually enjoyed, so i figured it couldn't be bad. not long after i finished reading, i learned that it would be adapted for the big screen.

on a school trip in april, me and so many of my classmates were caught up in hunger games mania. we tried our hand at being katniss with archery and pretended to be tributes in the woods. i wrote a couple chapters of some horrible self-insert fanfiction that's been lost to time, where my oc was bffs with some of my favorite characters: annie cresta and finnick odair.

throughout middle and high school, i made note of the release dates for every hunger games film, and i went to see catching fire and mockingjay part 1 in theaters. i revisited the series with a keener eye when i was a little older, and i began to understand the true literary genius of it.

for my last high school english assignment in 2018, we were allowed to do anything we wanted. earlier that year, our teacher had said something disparaging about the literary merit of the trilogy, so i decided made a short video about the series, fan films, and 1984.

on june 17, 2019, i learned for the first time that suzanne collins was working on a prequel, set to release on may 19, 2020. i learned at the same time that a movie adaptation was already in the works. i was skeptical when i heard it would be about president snow, but this series had captured my heart seven years prior, so there was no way i was passing this up. i preordered the book as soon as i could.

when it came in the mail on my twentieth birthday, i read the ballad of songbirds and snakes in that single day, for twelve hours straight. when i finally put it down, i'd managed to give myself a nasty eyestrain headache, but i was so, so happy.

i followed the production of the film with interest, as closely as i could with information made publicly available by actors, producers, and fans. i was always excited to share what i'd learned with my parents, and eventually, we were calling it my movie.

last year, in the last few days of august, i embarked on a mission to write a canon-compliant fanfiction about another one of my favorite characters, johanna mason. i posted the first chapter of "as long as i'm burning" in september, and i would write nearly 150k words between then and this past march.

although the fic has been on hiatus since then due to my copious mental issues, alaib and the canon series have been at the forefront of my mind all year. i started to regularly edit the hunger games wiki in may, and i've made over 2000 edits since then. last month, i even made my own private wiki for alaib on miraheze.

i cannot express how much this series means to me. the book release for tbosas genuinely kept me alive in some of my darkest days, and the movie is keeping me going every day even now. i love the world, its characters, and its commentary on our world. i love its message of hope and recovery in such cruel, dire circumstances. i love its love for kindness, freedom, and justice.

and i love that i get to share it with all of you. because even though i had nothing to do with its creation, tbosas feels so deeply personal to me. in my heart it's my movie, and i can't wait for everyone to be able to see it.

i've queued this over a week in advance because i don't expect to be nearly so coherent the day of. at time of posting, i should be heading into the theater, and the hunger games: the ballad of songbirds and snakes will be beginning any minute now.

this has been such an incredible journey. i'll see you in a few hours.

#welcome to the shitshow.txt #thg #hunger games #tbosas

[panicatthediaz]

Holy shit I am alive! Well, I'm just on Tumblr less, but I'm around. And I'm still writing!! If you couldn't guess by the not actual Sunday posting, I'm not ready to go back to regular posting. On top of on-a-whim WIPs I have at least one work project a week, and this week is my last week before finals for the semester :) somebody save me But I wanted to give y'all something, so this is it.

[Part 1] – [Part 10] – [Part 12]

@madaboutmunson @lamburrito @benjaminrussell @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @dijkstraspath @queerbuckleys @spectrum-spectre @epiclazershark @redheadchimechild @steddie-there @gayngerthings @manda-panda-monium (I... hope no one else changed their URLs for pride month 😂)

Pin a String to My Chest – 11

A song

When he started high school months ago, Eddie hadn't expected to find people that shared his interests for a while; he wasn't the oldest guy in the band, but the rest of Corroded Coffin still had to finish middle school, so he wasn't sure what to expect.

In the end, Ollie, their drummer, decided to drag him to a D&D session, and the rest was history. It had been some of the best fun he had, and he was sure the others would like it too.

It had also become a small problem.

Eddie dropped himself on the couch next to Wayne as soon as he got home. Hellfire had run a little bit later than expected, but it was the last session before winter break, it couldn't be helped.

No, the problem wasn't the sessions running late. Wayne was usually at work by the time they were done, and on the off chance he had a Friday off, he was always warned of where he was.

(Eddie would not make that mistake, ever, where Wayne was concerned.)

Wayne glanced at him but kept his attention on the crossword he was working on as Eddie fidgeted with his ring. The radio played softly somewhere close to them.

Okay, calling it a problem was a little dramatic even for him. It wasn't a problem. It wasn't. But it was a little unexpected, he'd never even thought it was a possibility.

"Alright, kid." Wayne put the newspaper down, turning slightly to look at him. "What's goin' on with you?"

"Uh," he stalled like an idiot. If something would make Wayne assume something was wrong, hesitating would be it. "I don't… It's not bad."

"But it is something," Wayne guessed. "What kind of something?"

"You ever figure something out that you thought you knew about yourself?" Eddie asked, but made a face immediately after, twisting in his seat to look at Wayne as well. "Like… You thought something, but it turns out that the truth is something else?" He chanced a look at Wayne's face and saw a flicker of understanding. "It's nothing bad! I promise it's nothing bad."

Wayne nodded. "You said that, Eddie, and I believe you." His eyes unfocused for a moment, in a way Eddie knew meant his uncle was looking for words. "Well, there was that one time I learned I'm allergic to grapes, remember?"

Eddie nodded. That had happened years ago when his Ma was still alive, and it had freaked him out as a kid. It had been a surprise to Wayne as well.

"Now, I'm guessin' this isn't about food, or even music," he prompted. Eddie nodded, looking down at his hands and spinning the ring on his finger. "You know whatever's in your head is safe here, Eddie."

"I know," he groaned. "It's just… not something I expected?" Eddie shrugged. "I told you about Dylan, right?"

"Yeah?" Wayne nodded, looking a little confused. "First kid from your club to actually try and teach you that game of yours? You made 'im kinda hard to forget, Eddie." The smirk was both on Wayne's face and voice. Eddie flopped onto his back, almost hitting his head on the arm of the couch and causing Wayne to huff a laugh. "What about him?"

"Ollie said he was flirting. With me," he clarified while looking at the trailer ceiling. There was a stain up there that they should probably look into at some point.

"And that's not bad."

Eddie hummed his negative, spinning the ring that used to be his mother's.

"I mean, I didn't notice but Ollie swears he was." His hands started moving above his body. "And while Kant was driving us all home, I realized that I didn't really mind if he was, it's—it's kinda nice, and I wouldn't mind!" He raised his head a little to look at Wayne. "I mean, I know there's nothing wrong with liking another boy," he said in a low voice. At this time, there wasn't anyone to overhear their conversation. It just seemed like the softness was needed. "I just never stopped to think about it."

Wayne hummed thoughtfully, and Eddie stretched out on the couch, unceremoniously dropping his feet on Wayne's lap.

"Pretty sure this is a good age to be thinking about this stuff, Eddie." Wayne patted his leg, ignoring the noise he'd just made. "I was about 20 when I thought, hell, maybe I'm better off just by myself."

"I spent all that time telling Dick that I wasn't interested in boys like that," Eddie mused, the nickname he bestowed upon his father making him smile. Wayne shook his head with a smile of his own. "Might have saved some time if I'd just—"

"Don't even go there, kid," he interrupted. "Your old man was a piece of work who couldn't handle not being in control."

Eddie sighed, nodding slowly. "So, what do I do?"

"About what?"

"Wayne!" Eddie shot up from the couch, standing in front of his uncle with his arms crossed.

"Alright, alright," Wayne conceded with a chuckle. "Do you like him?"

"I…" Eddie frowned, thinking it over. "Think so?" Wayne raised an eyebrow at him, waiting. "He's a good person! He listens, y'know, and he's nice to be around."

"That ain't quite enough, kid," Wayne said softly. "You need to know for sure because people have their expectations in a relationship, and you need to know whether you two can find a middle ground."

"Expectations like…" His frown deepened, trying to think of something. "What?"

"All sorts of things," Wayne shrugged. "Sex, for one."

Eddie groaned, sitting down on the little coffee table that was behind him. It creaked ominously for a moment but settled down again. Wayne chuckled and continued talking. Eddie only half listened, as he was prone to when he wasn't interested in the topic, while Wayne kept going about how people — most of them, anyway — eventually wanted more "physical action" out of the relationship. Some sooner than others.

Those were Wayne's words. He wasn't sure how his uncle knew any of it, Eddie had never heard about the man being in any sort of relationship, ever, but the fact was that Eddie would much rather just… not do what he was very obviously implying.

Did people really have nothing better to do? This was starting to feel a little bit like some of the conversations he'd overheard over the halls in high school…

It was kind of ridiculous.

"Okay!" Eddie exclaimed, raising his arms to stop Wayne before he could go into any type of detail. "How the hell do you even know any of this?!"

Wayne shrugged, smiling in a way that made Eddie narrow his eyes. He did not want to know.

"Either way," Wayne continued softly. "Make sure to respect them and that they respect you, kid." He stood up, patting his shoulder. "Just want you to stay safe."

Eddie watched him move to the kitchen for a moment before standing up himself. He turned the radio up a little, just enough to be heard from his room. He didn't think Wayne had anything to worry about; if what he'd just said was true, Eddie was probably better off on his own just as Wayne was.

He lay down on his bed, listening to Woody Guthrie's voice in the background. He wasn't sure which song it was, but he had the impression of it being one of Wayne's favorites. He was sure he'd listened to it a lot since he came live with him.

It wasn't long before he fell asleep to the music.

At some point, Eddie was aware he was on his back. He usually moved around in bed more, but he felt tired. Still tired. He was supposed to feel better rested, he'd been asleep just now.

He could still hear the music on the radio, lowered and muffled somewhere to his right.

Do not think 'bout tomorrow; let tomorrow come and go…

Right, that was Wayne's favorite song, one of the first he'd taught Eddie on the acoustic guitar. Without opening his eyes, he tapped his finger on the bed to the rhythm of it. It wasn't his usual type of music but it was… pleasant.

Something wrapped around his wrist, stilling the movement of his hand. He tensed. The last time something held him— He tried holding onto his sheets, but the thin, scratchy material felt wrong and—

"Eddie," a soft voice called to him. He didn't know it, he didn't like it. Whoever they were, moved their hand so they were holding his hand instead. "Can you squeeze my hand?"

He didn't want to listen to them, but he could tell it was important. It took more effort than he'd expected to put any type of pressure on the hand holding his. He couldn't think of it as a squeeze of any kind.

"That's great, Eddie, that's great." They sounded happy for some reason. "Think you can open your eyes, now?"

Eddie made a noise that might have been a no if he had any more energy. The stranger — a woman, he realized — chuckled.

"I know it's unpleasant, but we really need you to open your eyes."

He wanted to go back to sleep. He was still tired, his body was aching all over, head to toe. But he was pretty sure she wouldn't let him sleep again.

If squeezing her hand took effort, opening his eyes was like… something worse. There was a golden-ish glow to the room he was in, but not much in the way of furniture of any kind. It was him and this lady.

Listen to the steel rails hummin', that's the hobo's lullaby.

"Wayne…?"

#asexual Eddie Munson #Stranger Things #Eddie Munson #Steddie #Stranger Things fic #Steddie fic #Eddie Munson fic #ace!Eddie Munson #asexuality #Wayne Munson #Steve Harrington #Dustin Henderson #wereswriting #These are my permanent tags. Who this story is *about*. So they stay even if the characters are not in the part posted. #Happy Pride month y'all :)

[floresmarique]

Dragon & Bird (Last Boss x OFC!)

Hello! This is the first time i write about Alice In Borderland, but i got soo obsessed with the series that writing about one of my favorite characters was the only way that could help me release this obsession lmao.

Let me know if you'd like a part two!

WARNINGS: smut, mention of death, blood, use of spitting, use of dirty nicknames, loss of virginity, rough sex, unprotected sex.

Enjoy!

~

Anya didn't know how she ended up in Borderland.

All she remembered from the day everyone suddenly disappeared and life started becoming a survival game, was that she was normally doing what she always did; taking photographs. Anya was in Japan for two years to study, her goal was to become a polyglot and a turistic guide since she loved to travel and explore the world, it was the job of her dreams. Her passion, however, was photography and cinematography. She had short films and photographs of every place she visited and of the people that lived there. That material along with her curiosity of exploring, was everything that made her feel alive in a world were she almost felt invisible.

Anya ran away from her home as soon as she turned eighteen. Her relationship with her parents in her hometown wasn't exactly ideal and it was, in fact, abusive. She felt like they wanted to cut her wings off to let her stay on the ground with them, while Anya was a colourful bird full of life that wanted to know every single thing about the world that surrounded her. But they kept her in a cage, and a bird in a cage isn't natural and will always find a way to escape before dying of desperation and pain. Her parents liked to project the life they were forced to chose on Anya, the one of a doctor and of a secretary. But when she turned eighteen, they knew they couldn't keep her in that cage anymore and that it was her right to open her wings and fly away.

And that's exactly what she did.

At the age of 23, she had visited many places; India, France, Italy, Holland, Brazil.

And now Japan, which was her biggest aspiration since she started to travel the world. She was fascinated by the culture, their cinematography, their artists. The money she used for her travels were the money she saved during her teenage years, the money she never spent to go to parties and to shopping. She worked as a waitress after school hours and, somehow, she still managed to balance studying and working. Then, as she moved from city to city, she always found some little part time jobs to save other money. It wasn't simple, but she made it look easy with her nonchalant and carefree attitude. The people she met were always admired by her when she told them her story, but she was too humble for admiration. With all the money she saved, she could finally afford to study in Japan. She could already speak four languages fluently and was now learning Japanese. Anya never liked to stay in a place for too long, and didn't even like to get too affectionate to the people she met because there was always something that made her want to move away. She in fact struggled with relationships with boys, because they always seemed to bore her out or not understand her at all. Same thing with friends. She was a lonely bird that liked to fly in the big blue sky alone without a destination. While she was in France, she met a middle aged man that was an astrologer and told her that her way of wanting to escape and her need to travel to live to the fullest was all because of her Sun sign being a Sagittarius. It made her laugh everytime she thought about that since she had always been sceptical about astrology but she considered that little encounter part of her experience.

But Anya was having trouble leaving Japan, and not only for her studying but because she found herself to be perfectly comfortable there, it was like she could picture her whole life in Tokyo. Of course even Japan had flaws like every country in the world, but there was something about those city lights at night, about the many photographs she took of the people passing. Each told a different story. She couldn't really explain it, but everytime she went out of her apartment for a quick smoke, she couldn't help but to feel a warmth spread in her chest, a sense of joy that she never felt. But also a sense of emptiness in the depths of her sould.

Everything changed on that day.

Anya was taking photographs after a lesson of Japanese. The sun was high and shining on the population that was busy with their lives. Anya was taking photographs with one of her many cameras, which that time was an old Polaroid. She clearly remembered of taking a photograph of a man with messy black hair that didn't look well groomed and a beard, he had empty droopy eyelids and made eye contact with Anya after she snapped a photograph of the man walking infront of her with plastic bags that probably contained groceries. The man walked as if he didn't own his own height, it almost looked awkward and it made Anya wonder about his story. Then, as she was about to move the camera out of her sight to concentrate on the rest of the streets, she noticed that everyone mysteriously disappeared.

That's how Anya ended up in the Borderlands and found herself fighting to stay alive between mortal games and people you couldn't easily trust. During her stay in Borderland she ended up at the infamous place called The Beach, where the main purpose was to collect every single card from the games and live the moments outside the games freely using methods like partying all night, drugs and sexual intercourse. Anya preferred to live her days there only because it had doctors that could help people with injuries after games, bedrooms to rest well and food. All she had to do was follow the rules and stay away from the militants. However, since she was the only non - japanese person in there, she unconsciously had many eyes set on her, the militants ones included. Some people rationally thought that she was probably a tourist and she ended up there just like them, but Anya also had to physically confront people that thought she was the brain behind all of that blood and death only because she was a foreign. She often found funny how quickly people change when their life is at a risk. But she couldn't judge; they were all humans that didn't know what the heck was happening and tried to find comfort in everything. She still had her Polaroid with her, taking photographs at that point was her way of calming down. Death didn't scare her, but dying without knowing what real love and life felt like surely did.

Even the fact that she had a mane of dark blond curly locks was the object of many stares. Usually some people asked her nicely if they could touch it, and she always said yes because she loved to see that kind of curiosity in humanity, especially in the Borderlands.

As she played more and more games, Anya realised that not knowing for how long she would be alive made adrenaline pump in her veins like it never happened before. It was even better than travelling, the thrill of putting yourself out there to survive. But she didn't like to kill and, when and if she had to, she always preferred to let the person die in a peaceful and non painful way. Why was she still fighting to stay alive to the point of killing? Because she asked herself: "Would i be happy to see the memories i created till now to pass me by while i'm dying, do i still have things to do?" and the answer was yes.

She was fighting for the love she never experienced, for the carnal desire she never had, for the emptiness she wanted to fulfil. And every night before sleeping, she would observe the photographs she took on the last day in the normal world and she would always get a lump in her stomach whenever she spot a person in the photos that she saw die before her eyes. One night, she concentrated more on the photo of that man with the droopy eyelids and she swore to herself that he reminded her of someone that lived at the Beach. Then one day, as she found herself staring at the militants transport someone new inside the mansion, her eyes fixed on the tall tattooed man with a katana on his back. She recognised the walk and those same droopy eyelids that were now surrounded by black ink. Anya decided to take a photograph of him with her Polaroid and, as soon as she snapped the photo, the tattooed man met her eyes. He sent her an intimidating gaze, but then walked beside Niragi and left.

That night in her room, Anya confronted the two pictures; the same lip shape, same cheekbones, same shoulders and eyes. Everything matched.

It was him.

She wondered what made him change so drastically on the outside, but she could still see the same sadness in those beautiful droopy eyes. Anya put the photographs away, hiding them in a notebook she always kept as a diary to document her days in the Borderlands. She then decided to head out of the mansion to smoke a cigarette by the pool, surrounded by drunk and high people that tried to suffocate their sufferance in partying all night.

As she drowned her feet in the warm water of the pool, she lit up a cigarette and looked around, meeting the gaze of the tattooed man that stood beside Niragi and other militants. She heard that people called him 'Last Boss' because he looked like a character out of a videogame, but of course that couldn't be his real name. Anya noticed how Last Boss couldn't keep eye contact with her, in fact he quickly looked away and adjusted his posture. She then caught a glimpse of Niragi winking at her with his pierced tongue out and she furrowed her eyebrows, taking another puff of smoke from her cigarette.

"The fact that you caught their attention is bad." She heard a male voice say behind her and, when she turned her head around to see who the person was, she noticed it was the blonde haired guy named Chishiya. She partecipated in some games with him, his intelligence and nonchalant attitude kinda intrigued her. But they never spoke before that night. Anya scoffed, smoke escaping her nostrils.

"I'm not scared of them. We're all fighting to stay alive here, them included."

Chishiya smirked at her english accent. His eyes reminded Anya of a cat, a sultry one. During the rest of the night, Anya drank two or three cocktails and decided to dance a little since it had been a long time since she last joined a party. Plus, everyday needed to be lived as if it was her last one. And it could really be her last.

When she got tired of dancing, it was already 2:00 AM. She wasn't fully drunk, but a little tipsy for sure as she walked towards her room with half closed eyelids. As she almost reached the door to her room, she heard footsteps behind her and she quickly turned her head around, trying to maintain her guard high.

Last Boss was behind her, katana in hand but Anya didn't back away not even a bit. He got closer to her, his movements almost looked like the ones of a tiger ready to attack a gazelle. When he finally got enough close to her to look at her hazel eyes, Last Boss aimed his katana to her throat but she didn't flinch.

She gulped, her fastened heartbeat betrayed her cold appearance.

"Why do you take photos of me?" It was the first time she heard him talk. His voice was deep and monotonous.

"I'm a photographer. It's what i always did even before ending up here..." Anya affirmed, his dark eyes looking her up and down. He slightly blushed when his eyes landed on her messy bikini top. "...and i think you are an interesting subject."

Anya had always been straightforward, but the alcohol made that characteristic of her more accentuated.

"How so?" Last boss asked, katana still under Anya's chin.

"I saw you on the day of the fireworks." She gulped before speaking again. "The day everyone disappeared, i saw you minutes before ending here."

He looked down in confusion, trying to remember that day. Last Boss tried to remove all of his memories from the real world, being Last Boss was his new identity. But much to his disgrace he remembered her, even before she mentioned it. How could he forget? She was a foreign that easily drawn attention. He slowly removed his katana from her body and she sighed in relaxation.

Looking at him up close, Anya was starting to feel a certain sensation growing up in her stomach, something she never felt before; desire. It was his eyes and the shape of his lips that looked so soft to the touch, she remembered thinking he was beautiful even when he had that beard and those unkept hair. And she also noticed the way he was looking at her, with flushed cheeks and eyes that tried to look at anything but her body.

"Last Boss." She called him, her accent sending him off guard. He didn't respond, but she caught his attention. "Can i ask you something?"

Again, he didn't say anything but he softly nodded, knuckles turning white as he held his katana.

"Would you have sex with me?"

Last boss didn't expect that kind of question. All his life he never knew what it felt like to have a woman touch him, he only knew the touch from his own mother when he was still a kid. Usually it was Niragi that got the most girls and not only forcefully, some literally threw themselves in his arms just to have a wild night. But him? It never happened. He would lie though if he said he didn't feel attracted to her, to her bambi eyes and doll like lips. Her body was petite, but still had curves that made him tremble at the mere thought of touching her. He stood still for a minute, looking at her with parted lips and eyes open wide. Anya found his reaction to be cute. Since he still didn't say a thing, Anya slowly walked backwards towards her room and opened the door, a playful smirk painted her face. Last Boss nervously followed her inside the room and, as soon as she locked the door, she stood at the center of the room directly looking at him that was still in disbelief.

Anya removed her shorts and the cardigan she wore over her shoulders, letting them fall to her feet. Last Boss was in complete awe when she also removed her bikini top, his gaze burning on the skin of her breasts. It was the first time for Anya too, to be naked infront of a man. But she felt strangely confident and already excited. Maybe it was the fact that he was a militant, maybe it was his tattoos or the fact that it was the first time for him too, but she wanted him with her whole body. Last Boss dropped his katana and removed the gilet with the hoodie, his eyes remaining on her the whole time. She slowly walked towards him, holding her hand up to caress his face. At first he seemed hesitant, but as soon as he felt the warmth of her hand on his skin he took a deep breath while closing his black inked eyes. Actions started to become natural at that point, and Last Boss started to caress her hair and the back of her neck before attaching his lips to her own. Fire was burning inside Anya's body and as the kiss deepened, it also started to become a lot messier since both didn't have much experience. But they were loving it. Their tongues were exploring each other's mouth, saliva was sliding down their chins and they couldn't keep their hands off each other; he started to touch her soft breasts and moaned when he felt her nipples getting hard between his fingers, while her fingertips traced the ink of the tattoos on his arms.

"I don't want you to make love to me. I still don't know what love is." Anya breathed, a soft moan escaping her mouth when he started to kiss her neck with passion. "I want you to take me with all the desperation you feel, as this was another kind of survival game. I want you to fuck everything away."

Last Boss nearly growled at those words and, not knowing where he found the confidence, he harshly pushed her on the mattress. He quickly got on top of her body kissing and biting all over her soft skin. She impatiently caressed his head, her bikini bottoms getting wetter by every passing second. When he reached the center of her pleasure, he started kissing her thighs as he harshly tore apart her bikini bottoms. The action gained him a loud moan from Anya, that felt more alive than ever when she felt his warm tongue slide across her aching pussy. Last Boss was pressing his still restrained hard cock against the mattress to get a bit of satisfaction, fearing of reaching his climax just by staring at her moan for him.

Eager for him, Anya took his face between her hands and hungrily kissed him, helping him remove his shirt. She admired his naked torso, tattoos covering his biceps too and she couldn't help but to kiss the black ink traced on his skin, earning a low groan from him. As Last Boss was too overwhelmed and distracted by her warm kisses, Anya took the lead and pushed him against the mattress to position herself on top of him. He held her neck while she passionately kissed his neck, the sensation feeling unreal to him but incredibly heavenly. When Anya lowered her body and he saw that her head was now between his long legs, Last Boss knew what it was about to happen; she was gonna suck him off. Even though he was a virgin, it didn't mean that he knew nothing about sex. After all, he still needed to masturbate during all those years spent in his bedroom.

Anya started to unbutton his pants, keeping eye contact with him the whole time. Last Boss tried so hard to not seem so inexperienced, but the way he was gripping the sheets for the excitment betrayed him. It was the first time for Anya too to see a dick in person and she was just as nervous as him, but the flame burning in both of them was stronger than their embarrassment. When she freed him from both his pants and boxers, her curious hands immediately gripped his hard cock. She admired it, observing every vein and the tip leaking with pre cum. Anya looked at him for consent and, when he furiously nodded, she slightly smirked before giving an experimental lick to the tip.

Last Boss closed his eyes, one of his hands drowned in her curly hair and he was careful not to grip it too hard. Anya started licking his cock from the bottom to the top, one of her hands were massaging his balls as she did so. His guttural moans were only keeping her going. When she started to finally bob her head and down on his cock, Last Boss opened his eyes to look at her with his mouth slightly agape and the sight nearly made him cum; her cheeks were flushed, hair all messy, lips wet and devoured by his previous kisses. He didn't expect it to feel this good and he started to understand why Niragi liked sex so much. But somehow, for Last Boss, the fact that she offered herself to him was even more exciting.

"Fuck." He impulsively cursed, both of his hands resting on her cheeks as he watched her go down on him with half lidded eyes staring at him. "I need- I need to be inside of you."

Anya gave his cock a last suck before returning to his lips to kiss him, making him taste himself on her lips. Last Boss took the lead again and gently pushed her under his slim body. Now he started to feel nervous, hoping to not mess everything up with his awkwardness and with the paranoia of not finding the hole. Anya must have noticed his change of expression and quickly caressed his cheeks, his eyes now concentrating on her face again.

"It's my first time too." She whispered. "I'll help you, but as soon as you are inside of me i want you to fuck me like an animal. Raw."

Last Boss gulped, the sparkle of excitement glinting in his eyes again. Anya took his dick in her hand and guided it towards her entrance and when she sent him a slight nod, Last Boss took the hint that he could give the first thrust. The first one was slow since both of them were exploring an unknown territory. Anya gritted her teeth for the pain of feeling her pussy being stretched out by his cock and Last Boss took a deep breath when he was fully inside, the warmth of her walls hugging him. For her it was hurting even more since she didn't even think about foreplay before, but it was too late now and she didn't want to waste anymore time.

"Fuck me." Anya moaned, eyes still watery from the pain.

"D-Doesn't it hurt?" He sounded worried, which made Anya smile. But she didn't want him to be worried, she didn't want those feelings, all she wanted was to have sex.

"It doesn't matter, it shouldn't matter. I want you to fuck me."

When Last Boss pushed half of his dick out of her to give an hard thrust, he saw blood covering his lenght and somehow that motivated him even more. With a snap of his hips, he was balls deep inside of her. Anya's legs wrapped around his torso and he started to thrust in and out of her at a furious speed. The whole bed moved and hit the walls, one of his hands was gripping the headboard as he fucked her raw just like she asked him. The mixture of pain and pleasure made Anya scream like she never did before, her nails running on the skin of his back. The wetness of the blood coming out of her and her liquids made a dirty noise that was making Last Boss go crazy.

"Oh my god!" She moaned, receiving a groan from him in response. With his other hand, Last Boss was firmly grabbing her hips, leaving a mark on her skin that she would later notice in the morning. Looking at her under him made him feel in control, the control he never had over his life. With this thought in mind, he started fucking her even harder.

"You love it don't you?" He chuckled, more to himself than directly to her. Her desperate moans were all he needed to slip out of her aching pussy, earning a muffled cry of complain from her.

"Beg." He firmly said, hand stroking his blood covered cock.

"Please, Please - keep fucking me!"

Last Boss smirked, little drops of sweat falling across the black ink on his face. With an harsh slap on her ass from him, Anya took the signal of getting on her hands and knees. Last Boss caressed her back with possessiveness, noticing a little tattoo at the bottom of her back; a pair of wings. He licked her backbone and, when he arrived to her neck, he bit her ear before whispering something.

"I'm gonna fuck you just like the little whore you are, because that's what you want. Mh?"

Anya nodded her head, panting hard.

Last Boss spit on her hole before entering her again, gripping both of her butt cheeks to steady himself. He didn't give her any time, he immediately started to thrust his cock in and out of her with an animalistic speed. The more she moaned and screamed, the more he fucked her. He growled as he watched her ass bounce against his pelvis and her breasts move with every thrust, then he reached his hand towards her mouth and pushed two fingers against her lips.

"Suck."

Anya immediately obliged and he loved how passive she looked in that moment, all desperate and wet for him. For him and no one else. Just that thought made him see stars.

When his thrusts started to become more erratic, Anya knew that he was about to cum.

"C- Come outside, please."

Now, if he didn't give a shit about her he would have decided to not listen to her or to not let her come. But Last Boss wasn't an asshole and the last thing he wanted was to make a woman carry his child in her womb. He didn't respond but instead started to use the fingers that were previously in her mouth to play with her clitoris, stimulating her orgasm. The harsh thrusts along with him pushing his fingers against her clit, sent Anya over the edge and she exploded into an intense orgasm that made her eyes roll back. She saw white, a choked out moan escaping her rosy lips as she came around his cock. Last Boss then slipped out of her pussy and stroked himself, keeping her ass in place with his other hand, emptying himself on the skin of her buttcheeks with a guttural moan. Anya felt some drops of sperm slide towards her back, it was warm and it also felt kinda ticklish.

They remained in that position till their breathing became steady again. After they calmed down from the rush of the orgasm, Anya turned her head around to look at him.

"Could you please bring me a towel to clean myself?"

Last Boss only nodded, standing up from the bed. He returned after some seconds, handing her a white towel that she used to clean both his liquid on her back and the blood between her legs. Last Boss started dressing, still startled by what happened.

"Wait, come here before putting your boxers!" Anya exclaimed and he reached to the end of the bed in confusion. Anya used the towel to clean his now soft cock from the blood, a slight blush forming on his cheeks as she did so.

"Thank you for tonight." She simply said before standing up to head to the bathroom. Last Boss heard the sound of water being opened as he kept dressing himself. When he was fully dressed he picked up his katana from the floor and gave one last look towards the door of the bathroom, where he could still hear water running.

After Anya got out of the bathtub with a long towel wrapped around her tired body, she noticed that Last Boss had already left.

#takatora samura #last boss #alice in borderland #alice in borderland smut #chishiya shuntaro #shuntaro yanagi #niragi aib #last boss smut #angst

[finniestoncrane]

I would like to hear your headcannons on any of the riddlers (or all of them, if you're up for it) reacting to his s/o keeping a virtual pet, like a tamagotchi, and naming it after him. Does he think it's cringe or cute? (I'm having massive period cramps, so I need something silly)

Riddlers Co-Parenting Tamagotchis

Arkham!Riddler x Female!Reader, word count: good god i had a rough day today and this is exactly the kind of thing that made me feel so much better thinking about so i pushed it up the queue, ty ty ty ty request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi minors DNI!! 🔞 cw for nsfw stuff: urm this has capullo in it so there's obviously sleaze and suggestive content but other than that sfw

Arkham

ok so i have put this somewhere before, but i headcanon that he has a tamagotchi that he has kept alive and well since the 90s, and it's called Bruiser, and he loves it with all of his heart. so you KNOW he would love yours too. you can definitely trust him to take care of it when you're gone and take the duty of care very seriously. they're basically tiny computer pets, kinda like his robots, so what's not to love? and what's silly about it? god help anyone who mocks him for bringing out bruiser in the middle of his schemes and now, he'll also go toe to toe to defend you and your tamagotchi's honour too

Dano

"what's that?" *wide eyed wonder* "please can i play with it? oh my god you trust me with your little...thingy? it's for US!?" 🥺 this man would lose his damn mind if you produced a little tamagotchi and told him to help you name it. he's gonna spend hours researching themes and names. he never got to do flour sack babies at school so this is his first shot at looking after something. he says you're going to be a great parent, and he's excited to be a dad and you think he's joking but he is getting up regularly in the middle of the night to check on it so...he might be very emotionally attached very quick. also you're pretty sure you very explicitly said it's made of plastic, but he sits it on a little pillow anyway just in case

Young Justice

"this is stupid and childish and oh god wait what did you just do? you fed it? it eats? that's kinda cute. can i have a go?" aaaaaand good luck getting it back. that's his now. he needs something helpless to depend on him, it makes him feel genuinely useful. but you'll still have to sneakily look after it to make sure it doesn't die because that might destroy eddie. he's a big fan of video games, a very cute boy, he'd freakin' love it if you liked the same kind of thing as him. he'd definitely buy you more, all the cute little limited edition styles and stuff. your babies are his babies now

Gotham

the disappointment when he finds out it's not a remote activation for a bomb is immeasurable. but when you explain what it is he's kind of on board. "does it have a beak, we're naming it oswald. and can they die?" ok so maybe try only let him near one that's not too 'penguiny'. look he kept solomon grundy alive, you can trust him to help you keep a tamagotchi alive. he thinks you're cute for investing your time in something so completely innocuous. it's adorable! although if you ever wanted to put it down and pay attention to him and his schemes that might also be nice

Capullo

this is dumb and you are dumb. you sure it's not one of those...vibrating egg things...? if you want something to play with, he could think of something better for you to fiddle around with. "oh come on!" ok so fine show him then, hurry up. urgh, the stress of handing it to him, he's just clicking all the little buttons, dangling it in front of you, and teasing you about it. he's so mean, but he will insist that you name it lil ed after him, because god forbid something else take away your precious attention that should be on him

#finnie writes #riddler #the riddler #batman #riddler imagine #the riddler imagine #riddler smut #fanfic #the riddler fanfic #riddler fanfic #riddler x reader #riddler x you #riddler headcanon #ridler scenario #the riddler headcanon #gotham riddler #gotham #the batman #arkham riddler #young justice riddler #dano riddler #zero year riddler #q #dano!riddler #the batman 2022 fic #edward nygma #anon #friends being friends #edward nigma #edward nashton

[all-pacas]

BG3 EPILOGUE STUFF

since i had a save from just before the final battle and, for one, had been dying for details all afternoon: this is from a game where i was durge and romanced astarion.

It's in the slightly random order of "who I happened to talk to in whatever order."

MINSC: Taking his job of "working with" the Guild seriously, and shows up to the party with a random thief he had been in the middle of dangling from a high tower. Says he visits Astarion a lot, but that Astarion keeps accidentally forgetting to tell him when he moves. You can ask him if there are others from the first Bhaal crisis left alive, because you're studying it.

OWLBEAR CUB: Been having fun fighting! You can suggest he settle down with Halsin or Shadowheart (I picked Halsin) and he's very excited.

SHADOWHEART: Says she's almost surprised you came; you can joke "what, just because I don't have a butler anymore?" and she says she was worried, but is glad to see that old memories haven't kept you away. She's found a little cottage in the country and is having a nice time living peacefully. Her parents are doing well, and her mother is teaching her to cook. She also has EVERY SINGLE pet she can find. Just gone from full goth princess to cottagecore.

You can tell her that you went Candlekeep to research Bhaalspawn history, and you agree you'll keep in more proactive touch.

JAHEIRA: The Bhaal temple is still standing, but she assures you it's empty, thanks to you. Jord has joined the Harpers, and Rion has rejoined the Flaming Fist, and is spending her time bullying them. Jaheira is mildly/proudly worried they'll kick her out. Again. She's wrangling Harpers and working to rebuilt Baldur's Gate. She asks if you plan on starting a family of your own, and you can tell her that you plan on letting Bhaal's line die with you.

VOLO: He's writing a tell-all, and says he's gotten very good at faking your signature for the disclosures. He wants to call it "The Hero and Me," and you can suggest "The Bhaalspawn 2." He doesn't think you should think of yourself as a mere sequel.

KARLACH: "I've missed you, you old Bhaalspawn. Oh - do you not want to me to call you the B-word any more?" You can joke that your "army" is bath salts and scented candles, tell her that everyone slips up from time to time, or brag about not thinking about it AND not killing anyone in six months. The answer I picked: "I see my blood not as a curse, but a duty. I have been studying Bhaal, so I can fight him, if his cult ever strikes again."

Karlach and Wyll have been having a lot of fun fighting and surviving hell. She feels a lot better, and tells you about their plan to heist a new heart for herself. You promise to meet up again.

WYLL: Mizora hasn't been bothering him much, sending him after legitimate demons and evils. She's set him on a new mission he doesn't know the details of, but apparently his target is a devil. He's happy to be traveling with Karlach. He's been able to visit Baldur's Gate and his father a few times, and dad's doing well, leading the city and rebuilding. No Bhaalspawn talk.

HALSIN: He's still hanging out in the former Shadowlands, and Moonrise has been torn down to make new houses. He gives you a wooden duck. No Bhaalspawn talk.

LAE'ZEL: Is just on her full YA Youth Hero phase. Has been fighting and leading and just being super cool, allying with the githzerai. She's currently a dipomat, and you can be like "lol, seriously?" She's amused and says you taught her that diplomacy and words are as sometimes as important as a blade. She's clearly joking around a bit (she calls herself bossy and that it's her charm), but as deadpan as ever.

GALE: HE'S A PROFESSOR, school of illusion. As a sorceror, you can say you're surprised he's only teaching one school, and he agrees and admits he offered to teach them all, before being told he had to pick one. He talks about how much he likes illusion and imagination, and so now I feel like I have to make him illusionist in my runs. He gave the Crown to Mystra, and feels great relief to have the Orb gone. He clearly really, really loves teaching and spends his time trying to make his students love magic as much as he does. He complains they sleep a lot, and Tara butts in to call them cheeky and offers to swipe them.

He asks what you're up to, and you can joke you're napping and thinking of becoming a massage therapist — he jokes that he's glad you found a new career, but maybe leave off your "neck snapping" past when meeting clients. Gale offers you a "guest lecturer" spot, and you can remark that "the healing of my cranial trauma would be a prime case study for the school of Evocation." Gale invites you to stay in his — SORRY, TARA, OUR — tower.

TARA: YOU CAN PSPSPSPSPSP TARA. She does not deign to respond. She asks if you're the one who helped Gale with the Absolute, and if you politely say that Gale helped you, she doubts it very much — obviously he's the hero. She then invites you to visit them, and if you accuse her of having no respect for the "co-savior of Faerun," she retorts that she's here, isn't she? Before dismissing you.

ASTARION: He's happy all your friends are well, but hesitates on joining the socializing himself, because he's just so good at "skulking." He says he doesn't want to hog you because he gets you all the time.

LETTERS: (This was not a 100% completion game.)

Art is rapidly declining, his age catching up to him. He doesn't have long to live, but is happy and content seeing the Shadowlands cured.

Duke Ravengard does not even mention Wyll in his letter.

Arabella is being trained by Elminster! Love that for her.

The Gur write their letter to Astarion specifically, saying they've been keeping an eye on him and admire his restraint and control over his bloodlust.

THERE'S A LETTER FROM ALFIRA ahaha. I did the Durge Savescum to save her, and her letter basically goes: Yeah, I heard you're a Bhaalspawn? I saw murder in your eyes whenever you looked at me, and I'm glad you're doing well, but I'm not going to tell you where I am now. Thank you for sparing me! Bye!

Barcus Wroot has the single most Barcus Wroot letter of all time. "Withers gave me this address and said I could consider writer. Well, I considered it. Return address included. Best, Barcus Wroot." I love him so much.

Dammon 100000% has a crush on Karlach. His letter is basically: "Are you still alive? I think of you all the time. Will you write to me? Yours faithfully." Omg.

Nocturne is in a new Sharran cloister, but she hopes Shadowheart is well and wonders if maybe one day she'll also be brave enough to leave.

ROLAN DID NOT WRITE ME, woowwwww

CONCLUSIONS:

Durge gets two threads: I am living in a spa, and I am spending my time researching Bhaal. Or maybe both!

Wyll and Karlach definitely seem to be hinting towards some kind of DLC, with Wyll's new devil target and the whole heist situation. Withers also has an unreadable note on his desk with Hints Of Important Things.

#the alfira letter makes me cackle #i'm glad the devs Know Us #bg3 epilogue #bg3 spoilers

[myrskytuuli]

 Oh my god, I literally just woke up and I have to write this down immediately, because I just had the funniest genre-shifting dream I can ever remember.

Okay, so this actually started as a sex dream, don’t worry, I won’t go into details, but this is so funny in the grand scheme.

So I was apparently hired as an actress for a porn set, taking place in this boarding school, because it was like a super cringe two students experimenting roleplay thing. The point is that it wasn’t even super hot, as far as dreams go, because it ended up being a bit too realistic about what it’s like fucking in front of other people and also about my skills to come up with dirty talk on the fly. It was more a dream about what it would be like to be a porn actor than about the sex part, if I’m going to be honest.

But I digress. The weird part was that the dream “plot” continued even after the wet part of the wet dream was over. So me and my two other co-actresses were just chilling and making small talk in the lobby of the what now cleared up to be an abandoned victorian era boarding school in the middle of nowhere. And the genre of the dream shifted into a nightmare as I suddenly noticed that the place looked exactly as every Victorian abandoned building from any horror movie ever. And with dream logic I could remember that I’ve been here before, with some friends, and that during that time we had witnessed some spooky activity. Like furniture moving on their own and doors banging etc. Ghost shit.

I started explaining this to my co-actresses. We three were now alone there, as with dream logic I knew that the film crew had left to do something else in somewhere else. The two women kept telling me to stop talking about the last time I was here, because it would summon THEM. And lo and behold THEY arrived, possessing these two women, making objects in the room levitate and summoning knives into their hands.

Now I was functioning with full on nightmare logic, where when you try to move it’s like your entire self is stuck in glue and when you open your mouth and try to scream, nothing comes out. The helplessness and the looming sense of dread when you try to scream so hard that you feel like your veins are going to explode and nothing comes out expect maybe tiniest whimper.

And the entities kept coming closer, and I knew I was going to die. But then one of them opened its mouth and started talking with that creepy-little-demon-girl in a horror movie voice. Something like: Oh we’re going to play such fun games” or some other cliché horror movie line. Expect that I guess the voice of a little girl unlocked my elementary school teacher part of my brain, and for the first time that I can remember, I actually managed to shout in a nightmare.

So I just very sternly shouted NO and slapped the knife from her hand. She kept summoning different knives from the kitchen, and I just kept slapping them from her hand, sternly telling her no each time. And it got pretty slapstick comedic. And then with the pathos of a disappointed homeroom teacher, I started scolding the two ghosts and or demons possessing my friends like; No. This is not a fun game to play. We are going to play some other game, something were nobody has feel bad or left out of the game.

And the ghosts/demons started fidgeting just like my 8 year old students would have, expect they were possessing bodies of adult women. So we all sat down and I started asking them: So, what do you like to do for fun, that doesn’t need knives. And they shrugged their shoulders very sullenly with a: dunno. So I asked: what did you like to do for fun when you were alive. And they both looked at me kind of very sadly, but with this small smile on their face, and that is when I woke up. and started immediately writing this. Anyway. Was pretty bonkers.

#personal nonsense #nightshift makes me sleep at weird times but also makes me wake up in the middle of my dreams in a way I can easily remember them #which is pretty cool because you get gems like these

[danielle-widow]

May’s backstory!

May, one of two children Maria Payne has.

May was a young, and bright child who loves the most popular toy factory, Poppy Playtime. She bought all of the toys and kept going there every weekend just so she can play her favourite game with her favourite friends!

She loved her family dearly including her mother who cherished her and her brother milo. When may turned 10, her mother got a job at Poppy playtime co. At which she was so happy that when her mom picks her and her brother up from school, she can play at the factory. Little did she know her mom works as the experiment not know she could see her children every again. May’s father, Bernard, got a call late afternoon. Crying, hearing the news that his wife was missing since a day ago, and the only evidence that she could be alive was a tie of her dress, on a tree that was slowly dying. Few days later, news spread like wildfire about May’s mom and the latest toy on the shelf, Mommy Long Legs. A year passed from Maria’s missing case, everyone has already forgotten about it and moved on. May was turning 11 which they wanted to celebrate it in her usual birthday place, the factory. It’s been a long time since she has been in the factory after her mother’s case. Her dad told her and her brother they could buy one new toy from the gift shop. May didn’t want to buy one but went anyways to watch her brother who suddenly, ran after hearing he could buy a toy! Milo, her brother, wanted a purple mommy long legs. So May, went to the cashier about to ask, but then the founder and the man all the toys, saw May and told her there is one at the back and if she wants, she can come with him to get it! She agreed and told her brother to stick with her while they went to the back with an absolutely stranger! When the reach the hallways with many doors they heard strange noises in each of the rooms. The stranger told them to go through the red poppy door, which he said “ it’s in there, go grab it and come back, don’t stay to long or she might remember”. They entered the room weirded out by the stranger, they see blood and broken toys around to room, and a giant mommy long legs in the middle of the room. Scared they wanted to go back but then the door was locked. Crying milo woke up the mommy long legs, they stare blankly as the toy stood up head down, approaching them. They scream for help and hugged each other dearly until the toy stop near them and knelt down. The toy showed its face and it smiled, telling them she won’t hurt them. They stop crying and gets hugged by the toy for comfort. Milo suddenly says” you feel warm like our mother”. Then the toys remembered her past life leading to the fact that, she was their lost mother.

Do you want me to finish this?



#poppy playtime #fiction #mommy long legs #sad #dunno what else to tag #help lmao

[lizajane2]

The Last of Us episode 2 rewatch

I'd like to point out the silence at the beginning of this episode, just the familiar background noise of a highway in the middle of rush hour. They don't speak until they're in the car and Dr. Ratna's first question is if she's done something wrong. Can't even fathom that the world is on the verge of going to shit. I love how that builds the tension and tells you that something is very, very wrong.

I honestly kept expecting the body to just shoot up and attack Dr. Ratna. And as she was removing those fibers out of the patient's mouth and it reached out for her, all I could hear in my head was that famous Frankenstein quote, "It's alive!"

"What do we do?"

She doesn't sugarcoat it either. Bomb the whole fucking city and everyone in it.

If you skip the intro of this series, we cannot be friends. It's just as iconic as GoT's.

"She made it through the night, Joel."

"Doesn't matter."

Joel, I love you cowboy, but your stubbornness and pessimistic attitude are eye-rolling sometimes.

Ellie mimicking the sound of the infected is just an iconic moment. See, me being me, I would've chuckled. That shit was funny.

Joel, once he agrees:

I love that in such a limited time Tess became protective over Ellie and how quickly they bonded. If Tess had lived those two would've raised hell.

An infected screeches somewhere in the city, me:

I really wouldn't survive in this universe. Not even a minute, shit not even a millisecond. Not from all the bread I eat. I'd be fucking screwed. And if I didn't eat bread, good-fucking-bye. I'd rather live in hell.

Honestly, that frog could've been as famous as Beethoven in the future. The beginning of an artist I'm telling you.

Not me just now noticing that Joel practically yanks Ellie back by grabbing her hoodie.

"How long do infected live?"

"Oh, I thought you went to school."

You are a child Joel. A literal child.

No, no it's the fact that Tess really fucking thought that there wasn't a Clicker or more, and hoped for the best... shit, absolutely not. THOSE LACERATIONS ARE FRESH, TESS!! IT DIDN'T JUST MOVE ON! YOU ARE NOT THAT FUCKING LUCKY.

That fucking noise haunted my nightmares for days... took me a while to start the game again. And yet I'm wearing earbuds, huge mistake. Awful idea. The make-up artists deserve all the awards though. The prosthetics for the Clickers are amazing!!

The flinch Pedro added when Tess revealed her bite was perfect for Joel's character. "It didn't have enough emotion." Bullshit, it said a lot if you were paying attention, you would notice his disbelief and shock but also the instinct to put a bullet in her head and the utter turmoil.

I also love the fact that the writers added the detail of the infected working like a hive mind. It makes things even more difficult, step on the wrong fucking fiber you could alert hundreds of them at once. I mean really fucking think about it. Fungi live most of their lives as branching, fusing networks of tubular cells and they can sprawl out over tens or hundreds of meters. Like even without a brain, they're able to make decisions and determine a course of action. It's really fucking cool. Terrifying idea to have with a post-apocalyptic world that has a fungal mutation that's able to infect the brain.

#the last of us #the last of us hbo #the last of us spoilers #tlou spoilers #joel miller #ellie williams #tess servopoulos