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#this is actually fake I just thought this was funny
mj0702 · 3 days
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The other Bronze – Pt. 16 🔞
This Chapter contains some adult content
Por mi vida... Te amo a la luna y de vuelta mi hermosa....♥️
“You can keep dreaming because that won't happen” the dark haired woman laughed
“Worth a try” you smirked as you pulled Jennis jersey over your head
“Dear jesus Christ” you gagged lightly after you sniffed the fabric “Sure you only wore that for that game??”
“Actually no... that's the same one we wore at the Euro final” the spaniard deadpanned “We're broke you know... we have to re-use jerseys”
“Seriously??” you asked outraged your eyes wide with shock while Lucy started to snicker behind you
“Of course not... but you and your stupid tactic had me run a lot – sorry that my jersey doesn’t smell like detergent” Jenni rolled her eyes
“I think it was a good tactic” you defended yourself pouting “Lucy you tell her”
“You put me in goal!!!” your sister exclaimed
“Yeah... that was funny.. the way you panicky screamed at Mills to keep “that bloody ball far FAR away” from you....” you chuckled as your sister hit your shoulder
“Y/N... you still have something to do” now Sarina interrupted and you know you still need to come up with an apology to Rubiales
“How believable would it be if I suddenly have a stroke?” you asked the dutch innocently and all players around you snorted
“Not very believable... come on... the sooner you get it over with the sooner I can reward you for your actions” the blonde coach winked
“Hermoso” you looked at Jenni “... it was a pleasure as always... I have to go and fake apologize to your... whatever he is”
“Oh Corazon... I didn't even show you pleasure but okay...” the dark haired winked “and he's the federation president”
“He's a fucking cunt that's what he is” you grumbled not even catching up on Jennis comment
“And THAT'S exactly what we don't say in our apology” Sarina said chuckling
“Do I really have to come up with an apology on the spot without swear words?” you asked in disbelieve
“Yes Bitsy...” Keira rolled her eyes “... and I know you can – you always pull your head out of the sling somehow”
“Okay okay... give me a minute okay” you huffed starting to think of what to say “... Hermoso could you stop drooling over me abs? I know they're fantastic – me girlfriend tells me every time we...”
“STOP talking!” Lucy exclaimed shuddering at the thought of you and Georgia doing anything else than holding hands while Jenni, Keira and Sarina bursted out laughing
“It's distracting!!!” you huffed
“I am distracting you?” Jenni smirked enjoying the little banter which distracted HER from the previous incident
“Not you... you eyes” you grumbled “I need to think quick here”
“Come on Liefje” Sarina suddenly pulled you away “We won't get anywhere if you butterfly with Hermoso all the time”
“I'm NOT butterflying” you huffed annoyed
“Yes you are... now... this is going to happen now... you are going to apologize officially right in front of the crowd and later again at the post-match press” the dutch said and you grimaced
“Really? In front of the crowd?” you whined
“Yes... this is damage control and when everyone sees how “sorry” you are we have a good chance that FIFA won't interfere” Sarina said seriously and you huffed
“But I don't wanna” you whined again but one look from the dutch shut you right off
“You'll do fine Bitsy okay... you're good at that” Keira squeezed your shoulder supporting
“Ugh.... fine” you huffed annoyed as someone handed you a microphone connected to the stadium speakers
You started to walk out of the tunnel and you knew the second the camera caught you and your picture appeared on the big screens since suddenly there was loud cheering and it made you smirk. You walked all the way to the kick off point standing there for a second taking a deep breath before turning around facing the spanish bench where Vida and Rubiales were still standing. You saw how the medics just packed their stuff together and how Rubiales had two tissues hanging out of his nose. You really needed to bite your tongue so you wouldn't start laughing – you were “sorry” after all. At least that's what Sarina told you you were. You saw how all the players – Lionesses and Spanish – were lingering in the tunnel entrance waiting for your speech
“Hi” you started awkwardly looking into the stands after the crowd calmed a little bit which caused a new round of cheering and whistleing. Vida and Rubiales looked at you expectantly and when they saw you wore Jennis Jersey you saw how Rubiales jaw set challenging.
“Okay guys... I'm here to apologize for me actions towards Mr. Rubiales a few minutes ago” you said using your “I'm so so SO sorry”-voice “... I honestly don't know what caused me to act the way I did... I'm in the wrong here because violence is never the answer no matter how disgus... no wait... I'm not allowed to say that... violence is never the answer! Let stop there... I never meant to assault you Mr. Rubiales...” you looked at Rubiales himself trying to sell your apology so hard by talking directly to him “... I never meant to hurt you and I don't have an explanation for what happened. Please believe me when I say I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart”
Even you know you went a little over but you really REALLY tried not to verbally assault him right now
“You did nothing but being polite to me and what happens in your federation is not my business” you said and some people would swear they heard a threatening undertone “I hope you accept me apology and we can forget this... incident”
You walked back towards the tunnel before making a turn towards Rubiales himself offering you your hand to shake it. He grabbed your hand hard his jaw still set when you pulled him a little forward
“If you ever pull off something like that again you fucking cunt I personally will cut off your balls and feed them to you through your asshole and then I make sure that there's no inch of DNA left of your existence...” you growled into his ear covering it up with clapping on his shoulder like both of you made up “... most of them players I consider my friends – family even... I don't take it lightly if they get put in an uncomfortable situation and I always will have their back”
You let go of him smiling sweetly before turning around walking back into the tunnel where everyone stared of it with disbelieving looks. You smirked feeling great pride and satisfaction with yourself.
“I am REALLY proud of you Liefje” Sarina beamed as you reached her letting her pull you into a hug
“I can't believe it... you actually delivered a grown up apology” Leah said her face showed pure shock
“Yeah well...” you shrugged your shoulders
“I can't believe you apologized” Mapí looked at you a little disappointed
“Had to... they made me” you pointed at Sarina, Keira and Lucy
“I'm proud you didn't punch him again – I was worried there for a second when you made a beeline for him” Lucy threw her arm over your shoulder standing next to you proudly “And you didn't threaten him”
“I definitely didn't” you quickly said and your voice was a little high-pitched
“Bitsy” Keira warned you
“Hm?” you looked at her innocently
“Please don't tell me you did...” the blonde looked at you expectantly
“So... my reward” you turned towards Sarina
“Bitsy!” Keira exclaimed
“What? You said to not tell you... so I don't” you defended yourself
“What did you say... I knew that handshake was a cover up... I KNEW IT” Keira said annoyed
“Look... I just let him know how... I consider most of the spanish team me family... and that I'll always will have their back” you said honestly “andhowIwillfeedhimhisballsandthattherewon'tbeanyDNAleftifhepullssomeshitlikethisagain” you mumbled before quickly sprinting behind Alexia and Jenni ducking for cover
“Come again???” Keira looked at you shocked while the spanish players looked at you confused since you spoke to fast for them to understand
“Could you repeat that for the not english speakers please Cariño?” Alexia said confused
“I rather not” you mumble “Keira will have me head”
Luis Rubiales chose that exact moment to walk into the tunnel and you immediately stood up taller again moving in front of Jenni in a protective manner – which looked kind of ridiculous since Jenni was over a head bigger than you. He threw a death glare at you but continued walking as the crowd of english and spanish players parted like the sea for Moses.
“It's kind of cute how you try to protect me little one” Jenni chuckled from behind you
“He's a... Mapí... worst spanish curse word you know” you spat looking at Mapí
“Cojones or Cono” Mapí easily provided earning herself a really hard slap to the head from Irene and a death glare from Alexia
“That... he's both of that...” you growled looking after Rubiales
“Don't teach her that” Irene told Mapí off harshly
“She asked” the blonde tattooed woman defended herself
“And you CHOSE to answer” the Vice-Capitan answered
“I just wanted to helpful...” Mapí mumbled pouting
“Don't push it María León and just keep your mouth shut” Irene grumbled
“Bitsy... come here sweetie” Keira cooed sweetly
“Oh no... not gonna fall for that... it's like the time you told me you wouldn't get angry if I tell you what I did and after I told you you made me do push ups in the pouring rain” you shook your head looking at her scared shuffling backwards
“I promise...” the blonde tried again smiling sweetly but you saw right through it
“No no... I think I'm gonna stay with Ona” you said and the people who knew you could hear the slight fear in your voice
“You still have a pre-match conference to attend” Sarina reminded you smirking
“Aaaawww maaaaan” you whined “I did what you told me to do – why do I have to sit through that as well?”
“Because it was your game today and not mine” the dutch said “So YOU are going to answer all the questions... in a nice civilized manner”
“Ugh” you huffed and turned to walk towards the media room “But I'm not sitting next to that sorry excuse of a human being”
“Good evening Ladies and Gentleman – this is the post-match conference and we have 60 Minutes. We do it the usual way and go 30 minutes each. All question have to remind professional and under no circumstances will private questions answered. You all have one question if you want a follow up you have to talk to the person if they're willing to do one. We start with questions for the representatives of the english Lionesses Head Coach Sarina Wiegman and Y/N Bronze before going to the spanish representatives Jorge Vilda and Luis Rubiales” the coordinator said and you knew the cameras where already on so you pushed the urge down to roll your eyes your face staying stoic “We're starting with Alex Scott”
You exhaled deeply knowing Alex wouldn't ask anything regarding the Rubiales-event and probably would ask something frivolous.
“Alex Scott for BBC Sports” Alex started smiling at you “A question for Y/N Bronze”
“I know your name and where you work... I've known you for years now” you interrupted her confused which lifted the mood in the room since all of the reporters started chuckling
“That's how it goes y/n... we reporters have to introduce ourselves before asking the question” Alex smiled at you
“Oh okay...” you said quickly “... sorry for interrupting”
“No problem... but my question to you... we were all informed beforehand through different social media channels that you joined the Lionesses as a side line analyst – how comes that you basically dictated the game today?”
“I was given the chance by Sarina... Mrs. Wiegman... Coach? What do I call you?” you started then looked at Sarina unsure which caused another round of light laughter
“Sarina is fine...” the dutch smiled encouraging squeezing your knee under the table in a calming manner
“Sarina gave me the chance to work on a tactic for this game – Spain is a hard opponent to play. I got to Camp with Lucy... Bronze... Lucy Bronze my sister” you started but then got all nervous again since you actually never had to do any press stuff before.
Again Sarina jumped in by stroking over your knee calming
“... but you all know that...” you chuckled at your idiocy “... so when we arrived at Camp Sarina pulled me aside telling me she wanted me to watch some of the spanish games and to come up with a play where we at least can annoy them a little bit. I'm pretty sure she just did that to keep me occupied so I wouldn't do some stupid shit...” you said but quickly slapped your hand over your mouth “... I mean so I don't do... stuff... but yeah... after I sat down with her showing her some plays she told me to put a starting XI together.. at this point I still thought it was all like... hypothetical.. so I did... after that she said that she liked what I came up with and that she trusts me and that I'll have the lead on the game...”
“Would you be interested in answering a follow up?” Alex asked quickly knowing that she only had a short time frame before the next reporter would be called up
“For you always... I mean... you did change me diapers – I think it's just fair” you grinned
“And you were so squirmy about it... but my follow up... what made you come up with putting Lucy in Goal?” the short woman asked smiling
“Knew you would pick up on that” you laughed feeling slightly more relaxed “... that was a last second decision – I had four subs planned... two at half time, two around 70th minute... I left one slot for a possible injury sub – I played some players who just came back from an injury and I didn't want to overwork them. That's why I subbed Meado off 73rd minute in... she played outstanding and I didn't want to risk setting her back in her recovery... I quickly talked to her after she came off and she said she felt good but also appreciated getting off. So after I didn't need the left over slot and Lucy was mean to me earlier – and Keira said she would pay to see Lucy in Goal – I thought... why not... and come on... it was funny seeing her panicky waving her arms around like a monkey absolutely losing her plot screaming at Mills to keep the ball far FAR away” you laughed which caused the room to interrupt in laughter
“Okay next question please...” the coordinator said also laughing and called up a reporter you didn't knew who had a question for Sarina so you turned out and started to look around the room with a bored face which ended in a edit about how you and Lucy are so much alike in conferences
“Question for Y/N Bronze...” a young lad said and after you didn't react in the slightest being busy counting the sponsor labels on the wall behind you Sarina flicked your ear
“Huh??” you looked at you confused
“There's a question for you” the dutch gestured towards the room “Attention on the room”
“Sorry...” you said embarrassed
“You got a yellow card... how did that happened?” the young reporter asked
“First of all... that wasn't MY yellow card... THAT was Onas yellow card” you started serious but your lip tugged upwards and everyone noticed that you were joking “... she committed the foul... I just... asked the Ref if she doesn't see the need to card it”
You heard Sarina clear her throat next to you and you looked at her innocently
“What? I did” you defended yourself
“You took my glasses and ask the Ref if she needs them to and I quote “see a foul when it's happening”...” the dutch looked at you unimpressed
“Not my fault she's a blind moron – that WAS a yellow card” you exclaimed before remembering where you are and – again – slapping your hand over your mouth
Sarina exhaled deeply and started to pinch the bridge of her nose shaking her head slightly as the room erupted in laughter again
“Okay next question... Barry... your turn” the coordinator said and you tensed immediately.
Barry O'Connor was a legend under the reporters – he was one of the ones who could make you or break you. He never held back with the uncomfortable questions and he immediately knew when you lie and THAT he would use to break you.
“Thank you Tom... Barry O'Connor for The Guardian...” the older gruff man said and looked straight at you and you just KNEW what was coming “... question for Bronze... there was a slight – let's call it ruffle after the game... any comment on that?”
“Good evening Mr. O'Connor” you said politely “... I'm afraid you have to be more specific – there was a lot going on after the game”
“You punched the president of the spanish federation – the proof is sitting right there” the reporter said pointing at Rubiales
“Yeah... not my best moment is it... I want to apologize again and honestly I can't tell you what happened... I saw how he moved towards Jenni Hermoso and the next thing I know is Sarina yelling at me in the locker room...” you said and everyone in the room knew you told the truth “... I got the great honour to meet most of these players beforehand when I was visiting my sister in Barcelona and they welcomed me with open arms and helped me when I needed help – looked after me when I needed guidance... so I consider them as family... I don't take it likely if someone makes my family uncomfortable – which everyone who knows me can confirm... so I just – acted to protect my family”
“You said you needed help in Barcelona... what happened?” the older man asked
“Barry you had your question and we said from the start...” the coordinator interrupted but then got interrupted by you
“No it's okay... I'm honoured to be interesting enough to get a follow up by a reporter legend” you said and Sarina heard that you were about to get serious “It's not really a secret that I don't play because I suffered quiet early in my career from three ACL's... so even if I wanted to play I simply can't... in Barcelona a... incident happened that left me with a PTSD episode... all of them helped me afterwards – Mapí León right up top.. she went all the way to the airport to get me english chocolate... I got in the honour to get to know a few teams through Lucys career... if it was City, Lyon or now Barcelona... all of the teams have a special place in my heart but Barca now – they are something else... Alexia Putellas is an amazing leader – on and off the pitch... under her lead this team stepped up coming together as a family – no matter which nationality or background...”
You looked back at the reporter who smiled appreciative nodding slightly
“So yes... they helped me a great deal... even when I got overdosed on pain meds and didn't know what I was doing and gave them nicknames and was high as a kite” you winked
“Okay last question for the english side before we're moving on the spanish representatives” the coordinator said and pointed at a young blonde woman
“Thank you... Sarah Mulligan for ITV” the young woman said “Question for both Sarina and y/n... Sarina what made you involve y/n as much and y/n how did feel or managed with the pressure?”
“You first?” you looked at Sarina a little lost which caused the dutch to chuckle
“Thank you for your question” Sarina started and you interrupted her
“We have to thank for questions...” you exclaimed shocked before looked into the room “Thank you?”
This made everyone laugh again before Sarina continued
“It's polite Liefje” the dutch said lovingly “... but back to the question... I got to know y/n when she was recovering from her third surgery. I just took over from Phil Neville trying to get a read on the Team having called up a few young players but also some experienced ones – like Lucy Bronze. Lucy called me two days before Camp would start asking if she could bring her little sister who just got out of hospital. I agreed knowing from former games and also from stories how much Lucy cared for her sister. The moment I saw her for the very first time I knew she was someone special. She was still wearing a leg splint and was still on crutches but that didn't stop her from refusing help even going so far to hit Lucy away with her crutch...” the dutch remembering your first appearance smiling slightly “.... she was so grumpy and angry – a deep anger and I must admit I was unsure for a moment if it was a good idea to have her with the team. I feared she would bring the team spirit down – but I was wrong. So very wrong. The moment she stepped into the Hotel lobby and I saw how many players were happy to see her I knew it was the right decision. At the first training session she sat in the stands just staring down on the pitch – I must admit I kept an eye on her because Lucy asked me too... y/n never moved one muscle just stared down on the session. So I thought I let one of the assistants take over and went up to sit next to her. I sat down and asked how she was doing. Her answer was that I should rethink this formation because it's putting to much pressure on the midfield. Then she just stood up and left. I looked down on the pitch and saw Keira and Jordan Nobbs were struggling to keep up with the pace I tried to put up with the play. That was the moment I decided to get her involved more – one because she has an eye for things no one ever sees and two she needed a task. She needed something to take her mind off her injury and what it meant – what she lost. I got her involved a little bit more every camp and this time she finally accepted my offer to employ her full time which I know is a big step for her. But a big step in the right direction. A big step towards healing” the blonde said lovingly and squeezed your hand
“That got deep Mama Rina” you mumbled getting a little emotional before looking at the young reporter woman “Thank you for your question”
The room chuckled again enjoying your young easy and light way you were handling the situation of getting thrown into a press conference for the first time
“I'm sorry I can't provide such a deep meaningful answer but... I didn't feel any pressure to be honest. As I said before until the very last moment – the moment that Sarina made me explain my tactics to the team to be exact – it was all hypothetical for me. And after that I didn't really have time to feel pressured – I tell ya this team is a handful. Just yesterday Niamh called out Code Red – which means no one is allowed to leave – because she couldn't find her lucky socks... turns out the washed them in the sink and hung them on the balcony and they just fell off onto the balcony of Lottes... that's the shit you guys normally don't get to see” you said shaking your head when you remembered how ridiculously headless Niamh tore her room apart because of a pair of socks.
After the room quiet down from their round of laughter again the whole questioning shifted towards the spanish men and you started to spin with your chair until Sarina stopped you gently putting her hand on your arm to calm you down. You huffed but stayed still trying to listen to the answers of the Vilda and Rubiales but it was no use.
You heard your name a couple of times but since you didn't have any context you chose to ignore it – that was until a fuming Mapí León with an equally fuming Leila Ouahabi hot on her heels came blazing into the room both of them throwing some words at Vilda and Mapí even went so far to crawl onto the table separating the trainers from the reporters. Seconds later an angry looking Alexia entered the room just in time to grab Mapís ankle and pulling her back and away from the spanish national team coach. She tried to get her players under control by pulling both of them back by the hem of their jerseys. Mapí was kicking and screaming like a five year old – of course in spanish so you didn't understand a word – the only thing you understood was when Mapí yelled “mi Nena” - but when you looked at Vildas face it told you everything that you needed to know. You looked flabbergasted to Sarina who looked just as shocked and shrugged her shoulders before you turn towards the reporters where some just shook their head in disbelieve.
The post-match conference was ended pretty quickly after that and you basically jumped over the table sprinting out of the room past Keira and Lucy – who were waiting for you outside the room – towards the spanish locker room. This time you weren't as friendly as before and bolted through the door without knocking even tho you could hear Alexias angry voice half way down the corridor. The second you threw the door open the whole team looked at you and everyone fell silent – even Alexia.
“What the fuck just happened?” you looked at Alexia lost
“Cariño I love you I do... but this is something we have to talk about internally” Alexia said softly
“Mapí was about to strangle that mop in front of thousands and you say this is an internal thing?” you raised an eyebrow
“He called her a “lost little child who wears shoes that are to big for her and she's useless”... mi Nena knows EXACTLY what she's doing... mierda we lost FIVE zero...” Mapí started to rage again and you became big eyes
“Mapí ENOUGH” Alexia scolded her “Everyone SAW what she did and her head coach isn't a useless... culo like ours... there's no need for you to defend her... she has Lucy for that”
“But Lucy didn't do anything...” Mapí said outraged
“Because her spanish is shit and she probably didn't understand” you shrugged accepting the water bottle Ona held out for you “And the way you hesitated at the word “culo” means it's bad and I'll definitely save that down in me brain”
“No you won't Bebita” Ona smiled sweetly but you know just like with Keira it was a warning “Bad word”
“Then Alexia has to do push-ups... that the bad word rule!” you exclaimed and Alexia looked at you unimpressed
“I'm an adult... I can say whatever I want” the blonde spaniard said flatly
“Rule applies for everyone Capi” Jenni now grinned “Down on your hands and knees you go”
“What does culo mean?” you leaned over so you could whisper in Mapís ear
“Asshole” Mapí whispered back
“That'll make 15” you looked at Alexia “That word is an A-grade swear word.. A-grade swear words make 15 push ups...”
“I most definitely won't do any push-ups...” Alexia rolled her eyes
“But I always have to do them” you whined
“And look how much more your arms and shoulders are defined since I last saw you” the spanish capitan smiled and pinched your cheek
“You suck” you grumbled pushing yourself behind Ona to seek cover from her prying hands
“No little one... that's me... she's more the...” Jenni smirked but before she could end the sentence she got punched very hard in the shoulder by Alexia
“Come on Bebita... let's get you back to the Lionesses...” Ona said lovingly already pushing you forward slightly “Say bye-bye”
“Ass-dios” you waved which caused the younger players to explode in laughter – including Jenni – while Alexia threw you a death glare as Ona quickly pushed you out the door
“Keira...” Ona yelled seeing Keira down the corridor
“There you are!!! We where searching the whole place for you!!” Keira exclaimed the second she laid eyes on you “Don't you ever do that again!!!”
“I was just at the spaniards and pretty spaniard taught me a new word” you smiled at the blonde proudly
“Don't even” Ona warned you
“What happened?” Keira turned towards the blonde spaniard
“She suddenly kicked in our locker room door... and didn't except “it's an internally affair” from Alexia” your sisters girlfriend shrugged her shoulders
“Uh Kei...” you pulled on her jacket a little bit “Alexia said an A-grade swear word... and she refused to do push-ups”
“Really now... we can't have that now can we?” Keira mused sensing that you started to get tired and pulled you into her side winking at Ona before turning around slowly leading you back towards the Lioness locker room pulling out her phone to text Lucy and Leah that she “found” you
“You little shite...” Lucy started immediately but got cut off by Keira
“Leave her be... she's dead on her feet” the blond said firmly basically carrying all your weight your head on her shoulder
“Come here Bubs” Lucy exhaled deeply hoisting you away from Kei into her own arms cradling you like you were a three year old again while Keira got all your bags
“How bad is it outside?” your sister asked Leah who sneaked a look outside looking at the crowd waiting for the players to emerge from the stadium walking to the bus
“Nothing we're not used too...” the blonde capitan shrugged
“I'm asking because of her” Lucy nodded towards your sleeping form in her arms slightly drooling on your sisters jacket “If she gets startled half the team won't get an inch of sleep tonight – you remember the drama after the France game?”
“Wait... I get the noise cancelling headphones” Mary said thinking quickly pulling already on Rachels headphones getting them off her and carefully sliding them on your head.
You quickly got startled by the sudden loss of hearing but Lucy had you under control quickly by manoeuvring your head into her neck. The moment you smelled the familiar scent of your sister skin you relaxed again becoming boneless in her arms.
“She's so out” Keira chuckled
“You surprised?” Lucy answered hoisting you up a little more “Fuck me... this was easier when she was 3”
“No shit Sherlock” Millie deadpanned “Gimme... I'll carry her”
“Naah – we're good” your sister said but smiled at her teammate thankfully “I'll just bring her into the bus and then come out to sign some stuff...”
“You don't have to – you're not obligated to do so and you know it” Leah said seriously
“I know... but they waited long enough now and she'll be good once she's inside the bus” your sister answered “Let's get this show on the road”
As soon as the doors opened the fans went wild – as usual and Lucy was so SO thankful for Marys quick thinking of putting the noise cancelling headphones over your ears. Your sister walked quickly with you in her arms towards the bus disappearing inside it. She disposed you into her own seat asking the bus driver if he could have half an eye on you. Of course he agreed quickly being a fan of you himself with all the shenanigans you came up with all the time.
Your eyes fluttered open slowly and you were met with – darkness. Darkness and softness. You bolted upright searching for your phone in the dark. Getting more arrogated which each passing second you knocked over a bottle of water which caused a light to get switched on and you were met with the sleepy looking form of your girlfriend.
“What you doing baby?” Georgia asked her voice raspy
“What are you doing in my room?” you asked confused “Why am I in my room??”
“Firstly... that's my room... secondly... you were out like a light once Keira found you and then YOU wouldn't let go of me shirt and Keira got Lucy to agree to let us room for tonight under the promise that I won't touch you in any “not biblical” form” your girlfriend informed you
“Wait... what day is it???” you looked at her confused
“What?” Georgia asked equally confused
“Day baby... what DAY is it?” you looked at her like you're going to have a mental breakdown any second
“Still Wednesday... game day.. 23:48... why” G answered keeping her voice even to not set you off further
“Oh thank fuck” you sighed “Get ready... come on... take your phone”
You ushered your girlfriend out of her bed – not without ogling her body for a second longer that would go through as “biblical” - and then out of the room up a floor hiding behind a corner taking out our phone.
“23:52... perfect” you grinned
“What have you planned??” your girlfriend whispered in your ear from behind/above you which cause a shiver to run down your spine
“Welcoming Sarinas new year of age” you swallowed hard trying not to think what you could do now with your girlfriend instead of hiding waiting for the pipers to come down the corridor.
“Oh god... WHAT did you do??” G whisper yelled “If I get in trouble for it...”
“Please... as if I let you get in trouble” you snorted spotting the first piper stepping out of the elevator
“Oh god... oh god no... no no no no no” your girlfriend mumbled with wide eyes having spotted the piper as well “You didn't”
“Oh I so did... mi Vida” you grinned evilly
“Me what?” Georgia asked confused
“No idea... Lucy always calls Ona that – probably something dirty turn ons in spanish” you shrugged your shoulder “Where the fuck are Toons and Less?? And Jill... where is Jill?”
The moment you said it you saw your two best friends sprinting down the corridor, little party hats askew on their heads another set in their hands. Less was carrying some glitter bombs and confetti canons.
“We're not late” Toons panted coming to a halt in front of you “What she doing here?”
“I'm her girlfriend??” Georgia said confused
“Still doesn't answer me question... you don't get to bake in our fame” Ella said annoyed holding out a party hat for you which you immediately placed on your head
“Fame? You really think that going down well for you?” your girlfriend snorted nodding towards the piper who just set up their bagpipes.
“Of course... that a birthday she'll never forget” Lessi answered grinning widely “Can we start?”
“No.. we still missing Jill” you pressed taking Georgias phone to look at the clock “23:59... come on Jill”
You heard the “ding” of the elevator and surely enough there came a big three story birthday cake wheeling out with a widely grinning Jill Scott pushing it down the corridor towards you.
“Where were you?” you came out of your hiding – which was useless anyway since Toons and Less stood right in front of you – speed walking towards Jill smashing a party hat on her head.
“Had to think about something to get the room card” your Godaunt and most trusted adult friend – after Keira – said pulling out the little plastic card from her back pocket
“What did you say?” you snorted Jill could come up with the best backstories
“Want to surprise my wife for her birthday” the older woman smirked back “easy in the nights since there are only teenage boys covering Front Desk”
“We'll leave quickly after we delivered our present so you two have some alone time” you smirked
“Thank you Cookie – we very much appreciate it” the dirty blonde laughed “You guys ready?”
All of you nodded and Jill very VERY carefully pushed the card into the electronic lock waiting for the signature “click” before pushing open the door. You had Georgias phone ready and when Jill gave you a thumbs up you started recording. The pipers shuffled into the small hotel room and on a small cough from you they started piping “Auld Lang Syne” and not even five seconds in the light next to the bed got smashed on and a completely demolished Sarina Wiegman sat in her bed, blanket pulled up to her chest, glasses askew from being placed quickly on her nose, hair standing in every direction like she just got electrocuted her eyes wide in shock. The pipers went seamlessly over to “When the Saint go marching in” before finishing with “Scotland the Brave”. The second the little private concert was over Toons and Less let the Glitter bombs and Confetti canons explode right over Sarina – and her bed – all of you yelling “Happy Birthday”.
Your plan was nearly perfect. Get glitter and confetti all over Sarina before bolting. What you DIDN'T think off – pipers where loud. Very loud. Waking up most of the squad in process. Like Leah. And Lucy. And – most dangerously – Keira. So the moment you wanted to bolt you were met with a LOT of Lionesses. Angry looking Lionesses. Angry looking Keira. You locked eyes with her and after a second ducked behind Toons before sinking down on the ground trying to army rob out of the room hoping everyone was too distracted by everything that's going on. Oh boy where you wrong – of COURSE Keira saw you the second you tried to rob out of the room placing herself right in your way. You looked up when you hit her legs with your head which you kept down so it wouldn't been to obvious who was pressed in that room – which was overflowing with players now. Niamh and Toons already got cake in their hands (plates were overrated at this point) as Leah tried to control the chaos. You bumped into Keiras legs and looked up scared to be met with two angry glaring eyes. You tried to quickly rob backwards just to get stuck in Millies legs.
“I don't think so, y/n Bronze” Keira seethed pulling you up by your ear “Are you actually mad? Did you finally lose your plot? Why in gods name...”
“Hey Kei... you want cake... it's chocolate” your sister interrupted Keiras rant holding a hand full of cake right under the blondes nose
Keira just looked at Lucy then to you and back to Lucy who smiled like a happy kid with her handful of cake.
“I don't know if I should yell at both of you or just give up...” the blonde shook her head
“Keep calm and eat cake” Lucy smiled pushing her hand closer to Keiras face who automatically moved her head out of the way
“No thank you... it's in the middle of the night” the blonde said a little disgusted
“And?? You think we ever get away with eating cake in the middle of the night ever again??? Embrace the moment Kei... USE the moment” your sister said before she pushed the handful of cake into her mouth and you listened to what your sister said and used the moment to carefully sneaked away from Keira.
You tugged on Georgias shirt at your swift exit and she followed you just as quickly
“You know you're in big shit tomor... today... today morning... later... in the morning” your girlfriend rambled
“I know... but so worth it” you smiled and the second you two were through the door to the stairs case you pulled her back on her shirt kissing her deeply
“Not that I'm complaining...” Georgia started once you parted again “... but what brought that on?”
“You still had a little frosting..” you smirked pointing at your own lip “... I think I better check for more frosting once we're back in our room... you are a messy eater after all”
“I.. I think I dropped some of the cake...” your girlfriend stuttered a little bit and you could see her eyes darkening
“Yeah... thought so...” you smirked starting to walk up the stairs towards Georgias room when you suddenly feel your feet leave the ground and your girlfriend hoisted you over her shoulder
“What are you doing??” you laughed loudly as Georgia sprinted up the stairs
“You're a slowpoke sometimes” your girlfriend said exiting the staircase sprinting down the corridor on your floor before fumbling with the key card to open the door
“Open you stupid door” your girlfriend grumbled you still hanging over your shoulder snickering
“Let me down... makes it easier” you laughed slightly
“I nearly got it... wait a second” Georgia mumbled but a second later you heard her kicking the door
“Baby come on.... let me down” you laughed louder lightly poking her rips
“But don't run away” your girlfriend said her voice a little whine
“As if” you snorted and felt her scrunch down to put you on the ground before she came up again and you were face to face with each other
Your eyes quickly flickered down to her lips before looking at her eyes again. Before you could make up your mind you felt Georgias lips on yours kissing you deeply and you couldn't suppress a moan which your girlfriend used to slip her tongue into your mouth. She pinned you against the door her hands against your hip she used her whole body to keep you were you currently were. You on the other hand fished the little plastic card out of her hand where it poked into your skin and opened the door behind your back without even looking. The door opened with a small “beep” and you smirked against your girlfriends lips.
“Show off” Georgia mumbled against your lips and pushed you backwards into the hotel room already pulling your shirt over your head
“Fuck” you panted as your back hit the mattress next to your girlfriend a light sheet of sweat covering your body “THAT...”
“Better than the last time?” Georgia smirked smugly her breathing coming out laboured
“Nothing can top last time Babe... but you tried” you chuckled turning your body so you were pressed into the blondes side tucking your head into her neck feeling how her arm sneaked around your back pulling you closer
“I mean... I can try again” you heard the smirk feeling how her hand started to wander again “and again... and again... and again”
“No... please don't... you tried enough for tonight” you chuckled as Georgia stroked lightly over your ribs tickling you slightly before pushing her hand away positioning it on your hip
Georgia showed mercy just rubbing her thumb soothingly over your hipbone pressing a soft kiss to your hair
“You only getter better with training...” your girlfriend smirked then yelped as you poked her side
“You telling me I'm bad at what I'm doing?” you pushed yourself up onto your elbow looking down at her raising your eyebrow
“No no no no...” Georgia quickly said pulling you back down this time on top of her holding you tightly to her chest
“Mhm... that's what I thought” you mumbled closing your eyes relaxing against the blondes chest just enjoying the time you have with your girlfriend without needing to worry about your sister interrupting
You felt Georgia wriggling around under you which caused you to lift your head – again.
“Really? You still want to... again?” you look at your girlfriend expectantly
“No... I actually just tried to get the blanket” Georgia laughed as she finally got the hem of the blanket and pulled it over the two of you “... wouldn't want to deliver you back to your pit bull-like sister with a cold”
“DON'T mention my sister right now... that doesn't.. no.. just no” you grunted
“Sorry...” your girlfriend chuckled
“You're disturbing my post-orgasmic-bliss” you complained whining
“Sorry... I can... I don't know... make you forget that I just said that?” Georgia smiled her hand starting to wander towards your ass again while the other grabbed your breast teasingly
“Gosh... you really are impossible” you rolled your eyes prying her hand off your breast
“I mean... did you see my girlfriend? I can't help meself” the blonde grinned pulling you a little upwards to press a kiss to your lips
“Mhm... I did see her... still don't know how you scored her?” you teased smirking
“I didn't... she's stubborn... but I'm glad she threatened to break me legs if I don't pull my finger out of me ass...” Georgia murmured kissing you softly and smiled
“Did she now? I should talk to her... apparently she knows how to keep you in check – you can be quiet... defying” you grinned letting her kiss you over and over again
“Excuse me?” your girlfriend exclaimed acting upset
“Mhm... didn't my sister told you – multiple times I might add – to keep your hands away from me?” you grinned kissing her this time
“I CAN keep me hands to meself” Georgia smirked “Question is.. would you want that?”
“Such a rebel aren't you...” you smirked kissing along your girlfriends jaw down her to her neck
“Have me moments” Georgias voice betrayed her as she clearly getting turned on again
“Mhm.... Keira told me” you smirked against her neck before biting down slightly
“Keira??” this time it was G who got sober immediately
“It's a turn off isn't it... hearing about them” you grinned sitting up now straddling her waist
“Yes” your girlfriend grumbled “What did that wanna be ginger told you?”
“That you got your first tattoo the day after you turned 18” you smirked the blanket loosely draped around your hip
“SHE roped me into it!” Georgia exclaimed sitting up as well
“Oh really?” you smirked down on her taking her face in your hands kissing her softly “Do tell”
“She just got a new one and because she knew Mama Walsh will have her ass she convinced me to get one too... then after the next england game she hugged her mum and of COURSE Mama Walsh immediately saw it” your girlfriend told you rolling her eyes “And the next thing I know is she pulled me over by me sleeve “Georgia has one too – and she's basically a baby”... then Mama Walsh had me ass too”
“She played you...” you laughed loudly “.... she played you so hard”
“Yeah... I had to stand there for 12 Minutes getting lectured by Mama Walsh about the risks of tattoos...” your girlfriend grumbled
“To be fair... when Mama Walsh has it out for your ass you better find someone who you can distract her with” you shrugged still grinning
“Yeah... she can be scary... but I'm still sure she loves me more than Keira” Georgia grinned straining her neck a little so she could steal a kiss again
“Bet she loves ME more than all of you” you smirked pressing a wet kiss to her lips
“Yeah yeah... you're everyones favourite” your girlfriend rolled her eyes again but the slight smile never leaving her lips
“G... I... have a question” you hesitated a little bit
“What you need, baby?” Georgia asked softly but seriously
“I want a tattoo... I want you to do it” you blurted out
“What?” your girlfriend looked at you dumb folded
“I want you to tattoo me.... I know what I want and where I want it...” you said seriously
“Baby.... I can't do that” Georgia looked up at you as you stare down at her with a little betrayal in your eyes “... first.. I never inked someone and secondly... Lucy and Keira would definitely kill me... and third.. you're 16...”
“Then I'm gonna be your first like you were mine...” you grinned and with each passing second it got wider “... Lucy and Keira never need to know... and my Birthday is in two weeks”
“Which still makes you underage” your girlfriend pointed out and you heard that you slowly wearing her down
“I can get you Lucys signing if you want... like... setting up a document that she's not allowed to kill you” you smiled widely
“I tell you what... If you get that done I'll seriously think about it” Georgia said and you leaned down kissing her softly “... but I'm not doing anything big”
“Don't worry... nothing big...” you promised scratching your girlfriends neck lightly
“And where?” Georgia kissed your neck softly
“Right...” you took her hand laying it on your left side guiding it up to the point where your bra would sit “... here”
“A rib tattoo? Baby... that's a bad idea... that will hurt like a bitch” your girlfriend murmured against your neck kissing her way down to your collarbone
“I can take it... I really want it” you said breathlessly
“Maybe somewhere else?” Georgia mumbled kissing her way further down her destination clear
“That's the only place Luce won't see it immediately” you now outright moaned “Fuck”
“Mhm” your girlfriend hummed sucking your hard nipple into her mouth
“You just can't... fuck...” you started to complain but your voice betrayed you once again and your hip rocked forward on its own accord
“You want something baby??” Georgia asked after she let go of your nipple with a wet pop
“More... please” your head fell onto Gs shoulder your hips still rocking in her lap
“More?” your girlfriend smirked starting to knead your other breast
“Please” you whined
“Fingers or mouth baby?” Georgia basically growled against your skin getting slightly possessive
“Fingers” you whined lifting your hips a bit and Georgia got the hint letting her hand slip in between your legs
“You're gonna be good for me?” your girlfriend growled starting to mark your skin with small bites not enough to leave a constant mark like she'd like to
“Yes... but please” you begged and whined trying to get her fingers inside you but her hand laid still between your legs
“You won't come without permission will you baby? You'll wait until I tell you that you can come, right?” Georgia playfully bit your nipple
“I won't... I promise” you moaned rocking your hips down trying to find some pressure relieve
“Good... and you won't becauseeee...” your girlfriend teased your entrance with one finger
“Yours” you whined desperately
“Mine what?” Georgia nudged the underside of your jaw with her nose
“All yours...” you nearly broke “... G please”
“Ssshh baby... I've got you” your girlfriend soothed you slipping her finger into you
“Fuck” you whimpered feeling Georgias digit enter your heat
“Mhm... so wet... so hot... so desperate” Georgia mumbled against your jaw kissing her way to the point just under your ear “All for me or is there someone else?”
“No one else” you panted against her shoulder
“Are you sure baby? No one...” your girlfriend bit down lightly “... someone spanish maybe... Jenni Hermoso maybe?”
Your hips rocked down hard on her finger your rhythmic movement faltering for a second before it picked up again
“Hmmm...” Georgia hummed pleased “... maybe that could be arranged one day”
“Fuck...” you whimpered
“Bubs??” you heard suddenly through the door loud banging followed
“Fuck” you looked at Georgia shocked her face just as frightened
“BUBS?” Lucy said a little louder
“What??” you yelled back your hand covering your girlfriends mouth
“You okay? You were gone suddenly” your sister spoke loudly
“Yeah... just... didn't wanna wait till Keira recovered from her confusement” you tried
“Can you maybe open the door?? I'm standing here like an idiot” Lucy sneered
“It's... not the best time Luce...” you whined “I'm... about to go shower”
“Well... then let me in and shower then” your sister wasn't giving up and you knew it
“You can also go back to your own room” you said helplessly
“Can't... Less has the key card and I don't know where Less is” Lucy groaned
“Lucy please... just... go somewhere else” you whined back even knowing all mood was gone
“You are my sister... why would I go somewhere... wait a second... where is Georgia?? Is Stanway with you???” your sister exclaimed
“No for god sakes Lucy... I just want to shower in peace... fuck off now” you yelled through the room and suddenly it was quiet
“Fuck me... she really knows how to ruin the mood” you grumbled lifting yourself off your girlfriends lap who was still rooted in her place “Unbelievable”
“That was close” Georgia stammed still a little scared
“Yeah well.. I was too...” you continue to grumble mostly to yourself until... you heard the signature “beep” of the door – your head shot up first to the door then to your girlfriend who spotted the same frightened look as you
You quickly threw on a shirt and gestured to Georgia to hide – which was ridiculous since it was firstly her room and secondly there wasn't really anywhere for her to hide
“Hide” you whisper yelled panicked while you threw a shoe at the door trying to block it
“Where??” Georgia whisper yelled back looking around just as panicked
“I don't know” you pulled on some shorts quickly
“Bubs... you blocking the door?” you heard Lucys voice and already saw the crown of her head trying to make its way inside the room
“Why would I??” you answered and tried to sound annoyed watching your girlfriend ripping open the door of the closet “Really?? You wanna hide in the wardrobe??”
“You have a better idea?” your girlfriend hissed back
“Bath or Balcony?” you looked at her confused
“Bubs... the door is stuck” your sister complained again
“You are stuck you muppet” you shot back pushing your girlfriend outside on the balcony
“Yeah well maybe you open the door then” Lucy said annoyed
You quickly went over ripping the door open looking at her expectantly
“What you want and where did you get that key?” you grunted at her
“Wanted to make sure you okay – you're on Sarinas list now... and key... Leah – as the capitan she has a universal key” your sister shrugged her shoulders “Jesus Christ Bubs... open the windows would you... it seriously stinks in here”
“I will... I just didn't want to come back from me shower into a cold room” you lied weakly “you saw that I'm alright now... so... good night”
“Yeah since I don't know where Less is... can I crash at yours?” Lucy rubbed the back of her neck embarrassed
“No” you exclaimed before clearing your throat “I mean... that's a little inconvenient Luce...”
“I'm your sister” Lucy exclaimed rolling her eyes
“I know and I love you... seriously... but I just want to shower and go to bed.. I...” you said trying to come up with an excuse “... I... have this... woman problem you know....”
“Your period?” your sister asked confused
“Yes...” you nodded slowly
“And? Gosh Bubs you really scared me there for a second... you need anything?” Lucy said lovingly
“Just... peace and quiet... please” you basically begged her at this point
“Geez okay... I'm already leaving...” your sister said and you noticed she got all defensive
“Luce” you whined
“No it's okay... you're a grown up now... you don't need me anymore” Lucy said already half way through the door
“That's not true.... Lucy come on...” you said again trying to calm your sister down
“Keira said I need to let you spread your wings... WINGS Bubs... not your legs okay” your sister said and pointed at you threating
“Okay Ew... that's disgusting” you pulled a face disgusted
“Exactly... sex is disgusting... never take part in it” Lucy said happy with herself
“Yeah...” you said embarrassed “... you're too later for that I'm afraid”
“Good... now go shower and then to bed... Sarina will blast through your door in... four hours” your sister smiled quickly checking her watch
“What does Sarina want?” you ask confused
“You're on her list... you gonna run” Lucy smiled before disappearing into the corridor again
“Fuck me” you exclaimed whining closing the door making your way to the bathroom
You just stepped under the shower when you remembered something important
“FUCK” you quickly jumped out of the shower wrapping yourself in a big fluffy towel before speed walking through the room opening the balcony door again pushing your head outside looking at your girlfriend who was just covered by a thin blanket standing pressed into the corner of the outside space
“Lucys gone” you smiled innocently ushering Georgia inside
“Do you know how cold it is in England this time of the year??” your girlfriend said her teeth chattering slightly
“Yeah I know... I'm sorry... but come on... I already turned on the shower for you” you smiled
“Gosh I love you” Georgia said pressing a kiss to your forehead heading towards the bathroom
“Oh and babe... Sarina will kick our door down in about four hours...” you nonchalantly called after her and you heard a crashing sound
“WHAT??”
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fallloverfic · 1 day
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Me: I read/watch Delicious in Dungeon for The Plot The Plot (spoilers for S01E16: Cleaners/Dried with Sweet Sake and the manga, Chapter 31: Sea Serpent, Part 1):
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Never escaping from the crotch indeed lakjdladj
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I also really love this fond look Marcille has for Laios and his excitement/him appreciating her genius/making use of the dungeon/whatever. It's really sweet. Chilchuck is tired and doesn't like being nearly drowned in a wall by a handsy elf.
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Laios is so adorable when he's happy like this. Poor Senshi lol
Finally we get the first true Labru episode, my beloved.
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Just shocked to see this mess of an adventurer. Kabru thoughts: Oh no he's hot. (yes I know he's not the one talking here, it just looks funny)
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Kabru is so good-looking this episode, I took so many screencaps of him. He just looks so amazing in the anime. I love it.
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Putting on smooth talker mode. Love him. Gotta flirt with the blonde tall-man for intel. I blame this whole arc for making me think Kabru is short; he's not short, Laios is just taller lol (Laios is 6'1"/185 cm tall, Kabru is 5'7"/170 cm tall). Or at least Kabru is still fitting the tall-man name and a lot taller than most other races, like the elves, just not as much as Laios is. (And for the curious: Toshiro is 5'11"/180 cm tall, so even he's shorter than Laios). I think between Toshiro, Laios, and Inutade (a 6'5"/195 cm ogre), I just had a weird impression of Kabru's height. (All heights from Delicious in Dungeon World Guide: The Adventurer's Bible)
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Kabru being dangerous and also cute still. I just... I have too many screencaps of him alkdjalj Beautiful man.
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Toshiro is a saint for tolerating this man. But they are cute together.
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Kabru and Laios kill me T-T I wanted to fic for them ever since Kabru first showed up in the manga cause he was really cute and I wanted more of him and he seemed fucky enough that he would be fun to fic for, especially with the sort of enemies to lovers vibes of his party chasing Laios' party for revenge.
And then there's this chapter cover lol (this is actually two episodes ago story-wise, but it feels more relevant here):
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And I was screaming in joy XD Particularly after we got to Kabru's obsession/curiosity about Laios in particular. I was putting off ficcing for them in case they actually met and yup, they did lol I still have a lot of ideas for fics for them. Maybe someday.
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This man is having the time of his life with this nonsense and I love it roflmao He was like "they're either evil masterminds or stupid" and it's kind of the latter and mostly just "they're weird and it's funny" lol
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I know he's faking so hard but it's still cute lol (Especially cause Laios offered to treat him to a meal, like hello, Labru date????) One thing I love about them as a pairing is their weirdness interacts in fun ways and it is hilarious.
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This man is here for this absolute train wreck and I could not be happier for him. And them. Look at that little blush. Bless him.
Truly a phenomenal episode. It's also interesting seeing how... disrespectful, shall we say, to be polite, just about every character is to each other. You've got Chilchuck insulting Marcille for getting incapacitated, Marcille shoving Chilchuck into a wall to nearly drown without explanation, Toshiro's retainers - particularly Maizuru - being patronizing to all the non-tall-men (and any outsiders, really, considering at least what Maizuru thinks of Falin), Laios being... disrespectful to Toshiro with his name, and Kabru lying his ass off to get the deets on what the heck is going on and essentially being the human embodiment of -grabs popcorn-. It's a lot of really interesting character, social, and political dynamics. Everyone's a mess and I love it. I'm late cause of various nonsense with me misreading something and thinking they skipped a week and being busy but ahhhh such delicious food to catch up on. So good.
Other delicious Plot:
The Plot in Episode 3
The Plot in Episode 7
The Plot in Episode 9
The Plot in Episode 11
The Plot in Episode 13
The Plot in Episode 14
The Plot in Episode 15
The Plot in Episode 16 (you are here)
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xielianlover2 · 2 days
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The first Hualian's kiss was one of the funniest things I've ever read. Every page was funny sjksks.
First, Xie Lian reverting straight (ahem not so straight but anyways) to Crown Prince of Xianle and going who DARES??? Who could!?! NEVER in his LIFE have I been treated this way. If this were anyone else, he would have stabbed them way before they could ever lay their hands on him.
But it's Hua Cheng!! His San Lang. And can ghosts transfer air to me!? Don't ghosts drown?? (Yes, I memorized the kiss scene. My memory is terrible, but I remember this vividly. I need help.)
And he's feeling overwhelmed that he lost his sense of self. He literally felt so overwhelmed he felt like crying. That part just made me sjskksks, feeling many things.
And then they break apart and stare deeply into one another's eyes and there's like twenty paragraphs of Xie Lian's monologue of how everytime Hua Cheng appears he just looks more older, more handsomer, more better, and omg is that a widow's peak??? Look at his eyepatch that exceeds a beautiful murderous aura, which should technically mute his elegance, but it actually balances his good looks perfectly.
Like. Okay, Xie Lian.
Poor Xie Lian. He's in such a rattled state. That kiss was way too amazing, Hua Cheng.
Usually he doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. That's normal. Now he doesn't know if he's hungry or sleepy.
And oh, look. He lost his bamboo hat. The hat he had for the last 800 years (shit, don't cry again this is supposed to be funny dammit), gone because of how mind-boggling that kiss was.
"I... I can't find it. I'm leaving now. I'm going home to eat... I need to go collect some scraps..."
Dying. He's so shaken. He's full-on panicking. He's like this is it. Hundred years of locked up and nailed to a coffin is nothing. I finally lost my marbles.
And then Hua Cheng's like "...I'm sorry."
The scream that tore out of my throat lmao. Anyways. I 1000% believe Hua Cheng.exe also stopped working at that point.
Then he was rebooted back online once he realized that Xie Lian was just casually hobbling on his injured foot, which you know had a nail embedded deep into it.
And Xie Lian is just absolutely losing it, especially when he realizes they're in Ghost City.
Not all the ghosts exitingly shouting if Hua Cheng needs help raping Xie Lian 😭😭😭
Oh my gods. That part. And Xie Lian at this point just feeling grateful he lost his 'fake baby' and didn't appear pregnant anymore 😆 (MXTX is really pushing the mpreg agenda, huh?)
And then finally when Xie Lian calms down a bit, his next thoughts are like... the state preceptor only warned me about the wiles of women :((
Nobody prepared me for this!!! So, yeah, Xie Lian, how does it feel to be a demisexual gay.
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mmurkoff · 2 days
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hihi not sure how fond myrielle and aerion are of each other (would love to know more about their dynamic if you are willing to share <3) but they remind me of the “who tf is burning down my kitchen” “making breakfast for my beautiful wife” twitter meme
anon ... i giggled .
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as for marriage dynamics well .. i feel like by default any relationship with a guy everyone hates for good reason is going to be a bit strained . but somehow they're both kind of deranged enough to make it work (er.. well... somewhat...).
ive talked very briefly about it in my little myrielle post already but it kind of had to grow into anything beyond hating each other . right when myrielle gets to court she holds a lot of resentment toward him, mainly because he's the second son of a fourth son - not really heir to anything, and even when she's young she wants to aim higher than that with her betrothal. she spends a lot of time pining after the concept of another man that she deems 'better' (valarr, matarys, even daeron etc - the actual people matter less than the fact that they're further up in the succession than aerion) just because she's decided to herself that she deserves more. a little girl playing into the idea of being a wife and centering her whole worldview about that ala really twisted westerosi expectations and societal structures
it's kind of what you'd expect from two very willful very spoiled preteens; a lot of petty squabbles and little disagreements that have them bickering and squabbling and it's a bit of a mess . in time though it breezes over kind of because they both grow up and 'mature' in the sense that they aren't calling each other stupid and pushing each other over in the yard anymore LOL
by the time they're married ... well . it's .... . myrielle is fond of him and finds him handsome and dashing while they're in public and in private he at least treats her well a couple days a week which is enough . i think it's very shallow in the sense that ... i'm not sure if they ever truly know each other fully . myrielle projects her ambitions onto him and steadily heads down her path to making sure he becomes king (after the tourney at ashford meadow and the great spring sickness when things get a little crazy in how many targs are dying off) and aerion projects some idea of the wife he'd imagined himself to want onto her . in my mind he's kind of giving targ man too caught up in the idea of his ancestry and his family traditions given his whole deal with the dragon delusions etc so its lots of hey what if you pretend like you're (targ woman of his choosing) and ill be (her evil husband) and then we'll be a Proper Couple instead of a Fake Arrangement between me (perfect prince) and a lesser non-targ woman . you can see that there might be some issues here .
definitely not good . they hold resentment for each other mutually for a variety of reasons but theres also some deep seated dedication there especially from myrielle . she gets so deep into the thought of the both of them rising further than they're expected to that she in turn essentially drops everything for him and makes a lot of questionable choices and does a lot of questionable things to keep him happy and to assist him in whatever way she thinks he needs . i feel like she gets very caught up in the idea of really feeding into the idea aerion has of their marriage . tries to play into the thought of being more of a targaryen and tries to shift and change herself which never really works because she does treasure her own family and her identity but also because things just don't go the way she wants .
errr. ride or die i guess but it's weirrddddddd . which is funny to say because in practice they both cheat on each other and lie to each other and fight and bicker but they keep going back for more . why...? well.. maybe duty maybe genuine care maybe a third more evil option. me when i go out and cheat on my wife but its okay because i come back and bring her nice gifts and we do our historical targ roleplay which isn't weird at all guys i promise please guys listen its not weird its not w
rubs my chin. a lot of thoughts but i'm bad at putting them into words. i hope this is anything . probably not. one day you'll get something better from me .... .... <3
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fodsley · 8 months
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transparent blaze rejection template so you can add it to your flop posts for free notes
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rotisseries · 6 months
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it's still wednesday where I'm at if your clock is 30 minutes off so here's my wip wednesday post for my day 1 @bylerween2023 fic!! ghosts my beloved
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the-monkey-ruler · 10 months
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how is china characterizing 6em these days?
From what I can tell, it’s been a lot of them have either been brothers, old comrades that once knew each other, clones, or even complete strangers.
2016 A Chinese Odyssey Part Three 大话西游3 - this one they never really met at all just that they happened to look like each other. He does sleep around a lot in this one. Deadbeat dad.
2017 Journey to the West The Legend of the Merman 西游鲛人传 - killed by Wukong, wants him dead and tries to pretend to be him to break him up with his girlfriend. Pissed-offed villain.
2020 The Real vs. Fake Monkey King 真假美猴王之大圣无双 - strangers but that Six Ears was promised his wife would be healed if he took on Wukong's memories and lost his own so that evil lady can kill Wukong. Loyal husband who lost his identity.
2019 The Monkey King: The True Sun Wukong 美猴王之真假孙悟空 - this one they grew up as brothers but had a falling out over a girl. Jealous brother.
2020 Monkey King 大圣 - made from Wukong's qi and used as a tool to gain Wukong's trust while he is forced into a fighting battle. Lab Rat turned good I think?
2021 Monkey King: The One and Only 大圣无双 - this one the guy is actually just a hair clone that gained too much sentience. Hair Clone.
2021 Six-Eared Monkey 六耳猕猴 - this one they kinda knew each other but moreso Wukong knew the guy was a shit and always trying to fight him? Also, Six Ears adopts Wukong as his son. Some jerk turned dad?
2021 Marvel Monkey 六耳猕猴之妖王重生 - Six Ears is dead and it's about his next life as a human. Dead.
2021 The Monkey King: True and False Monkey King 齐天大圣之真假美猴王 - not actually sure, prettying sure it's about Six Ears trying to get Wukong to fight heaven again. Friends? Brothers?
2022 Journey to the West: True and False Monkey King 西游记 之真假美猴王 - Six Ears and Wukong are brothers and Wukong took the fall for Six Ears and pays the price to go on the pilgrimage while Six Ears wants revenge. Brother.
2022 King of Confusion: The Rise of the Great Sage / Four Monkeys in Confusion 混世之王:混世四猴 /混世之王之大圣崛起 - this is like Wukong meeting all the spiritual primates so I'm not too sure if they are all meeting at once but it sounds like they never met beforehand as Wukong is meeting them all on the journey. Clan member?
2023 I'm Not a Great Sage 我不是大圣 - Six Ears trying to be a villain but accidentally becomes a hero in his own right. Pretty sure he was just some guy in this but still a cute idea. Wannabe Villain.
2030 True and False Monkey King / Dare to Ask the Way: Apprentice Chapter 西游记之真假美猴王/西游记真假美猴王 - this one is like Six Ears is dead but Wukong takes on Six Ear's apprentice as his own I think? Dead.
So yeah there are a lot of different takes in the past decade or so with Chinese media when it comes to characterizing the Six-Eared Macauque. A lot of directors often use their own spin either making him cartoonishly evil which is always enjoyable. Some make him just straight-up evil while others make him a tragic character that is either an abomination or a man that has been pushed too far and needs to be put down. At least two just leave him dead. And then some that make him a confidant in Wukong that has betrayed him and we watch his descent into his own downfall from one thing to another. There are a lot of different directors doing a lot of different things and I think it’s great that people can have their own creative liberties when it comes to the character and can’t wait to see where more people take him.
But these are just the ones I know about. There could be more I haven't stumbled across yet but I have to say but is spilt between Wukong knowing him before the journey or him just being a guy that Wukong happens to become his obsession. Lots of variations of the character that I think anyone could find themselves being drawn to depending on what a person is interested in or looking for. I think directors have a lot of fun with Six Ears as not only a character but as a concept because everyone loves a good doppelgänger sometimes. He isn’t as popular as like DBK or Iron Fan when it comes to like movies or such but he is still well-known enough for him to have a lot of interpretation
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fluffs-n-stuffs · 5 months
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Pokémon Horizons Episode 32 spoilers under the cut!
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WHAT IS HAPPENINGJGNGNSUDFHS
#fluff binges !!!#HANG ON HANG ON I WAS STILL REELING FROM ACTUALLY SEEING LUCIUS CLEARLY HANG O N#I HONEST TO GOD THOUGHT THAT RAYQUAZA AT THE END WAS A FAKE-OUT OF SORTS WHERE IT'S LIKE DISAPPEARS AGAIN NEXT EPISODE#BUT THEN THE PREVIEW??????????????????HAPPENEDNDJFNDSFIHSD#WHAT'S HAPPENING BESTIE AMETHIO WHEN DID YOU GET HERE LMAO HI I MISSED YOU BBYGIRL BUT ALSO ???????????????SDFHSDFSDFAHUDSNAS#NOT THAT I'M COMPLAINING I WANNA SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING SDJFSJDNFSD EVERYTHING IS GOING ON ALL AT ONCE#I have a theory that we got to this point so soon because they needed to show Terapagos' full form in conjunction with the DLC release righ#LIKE IT MAKES SENSE BUT ALSO MY HEART????????????HANG ON I'M STILL PROCESSINGSKKDJFSNDFSND#AMETHIO COMEBACK NEXT EPISODE REAL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!#I MISSED YOU MY EMO EDGY SON HAVE YOU JUST FINISHED BROODING WELL GUESS WHAT NOW CERULEDGE IS GONNA GET HIS ASS WHOOPED AGAIN SDJKFHSKDFNDJ#SPARE HIM THAT'S HIS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT PARTNER MON DON'T DO THIS TO HIM HE'S GONNA GET EVEN SADDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!STOPJDFUGDNSIHUFN#THEY'RE GONNA MAKE HIM HAVE A DEPRESSION ARC BECAUSE HE FEELS GUILTY ABOUT CERULEDGE GETTING HURT AGAIN ON GOD..................... ON G OD#also the image that Amethio's just been like . underwater that whole time since he has a submarine is so funny to me like actually#NEXT WEEK AMETHIO WEEK REAL 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉#I'm super normal about him . my edgy bby. beloved#anyways Lucius was hot tooSJDFHSDNFSDFSN#pokemon#pokemon horizons#anipoke#pokeani#explorer amethio#amethio pokemon#terapagos
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littlewigglers · 5 months
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Do you plan on getting any non millipede friends
I do! I’d love to get some more isopods and raise some beetles from larva again. I’d also LOVE to get back into fish keeping my faves are bettas, shrimps, corydoras and kuhli loaches! Maybe a snake or gecko further down the line? But those are what I know the least about and would be most hesitant to get as I want any creatures I get to have the best care I can give them.
I’d say the only creatures on my never list are spiders, roaches, centipede, anything else that moves overly fast or has a bad bite/is venomous/poisonous. Probably turtles too just due to their life spans.
But millipedes and isopods are what I’m able to keep right now as I’d have to get some new tanks for anything else, as well as all the research I’d need to do to be comfortable keeping them.
Oh also I do have two cats I just don’t post about them here, and I plan to possibly get a third next year but we’ll see :3
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pocketramblr · 1 year
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dad for one but with rei...
Could you like, imagine if Rei was his daughter he didn't know what to do with, she's strong and cold but doesn't particularly want to be a villain, and he doesn't much want her to be one either, not in any way that threatens his stuff or her life at least. But then he hears Endeavor's been looking around for a match and he thinks "oh, there's no way he's gonna fall for an ice match right, he knows that would end awful right" but uh he fell for the match and the fake family in need and Rei's beautiful but aloof air, so,,, why not stick with it and see where it goes? it'll be good blackmail material, right? and its not like his daughter has a life of her own, or anything. he can bring her back to the base after and no one is any wiser, and she'll hate heroes even more and- kid?? and a second kid so soon? does she just want to get it over with? well seems like it's working, his underling tells him Touya is having problems with his quirk, but now instead of divorce and setting himself up for blackmail, Endeavor just keeps trying?? now four grandkids?? and Rei, showing her nerves on the phonecall with him for the first time in years, tells him that Touya tried to kill his baby brother and this one actually had the quirk Endeavor wanted and AfO thought impossible?? AfO decides nows the time to collect his family back and gets Touya before he can completely burn up, but Rei realizes she'd rather have her kids stuck with Enji than AfO, so she chooses to burn Shoto's face so Enji keeps him close and sends her away and??? i dunno she just hopes everyone forgets about Fuyumi and Natsuo because they're safer ignored and neglected than anything else???
#i dunno might be fun to play with in a universe similar to blade's naive melody#which i havent read yet because i want to wait until its all up for my own mental wellness due to some heavy themes#but that i love already anyway#hm yeah Rei hit with the stick is interesting#definetely feels like afo playing a long game that he hasnt actually fully thought through himself right#he's both a chessmaster and building little towers of blocks to knock down#or heck maybe Rei told Enji the truth#and she was institutionalized to keep her from being too close to any secrets but not put her in jail?? or smth??#and they just. never told the kids anything#thats if you want to play it close to canon anyway#if you DONT oh hoho#there are many options#perhaps Rei arranging the match on her own to try and get hero help and just telling her dad its a villain scheme#but then idk enji doesnt believe her? because afo is a boogyman story?and she was too convincing with her fake family actors?#or does believe her idk#maybe rei thought the perfect quirk would draw her father out to where enji would see and believe her???#actually everyones playing chess and blocks now#just chaos#except the todo kids who seem all completely unaware#it'd be funny tho if afo tells dabi hes his grandpa and dabi's like 'i could not care less man'#afo: oh. i thought i could manipulate you that way#maybe he still thinks the irony of afo's grandson and nana's grandson on a villain team together#not that they're very good teammates but still kjhghjk#anon#pocket talks to people
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[image description: Elon Musk announces "Twitter, Inc." to be rebranded as "Updog, Inc.", following in Metaverse footsteps. In an unexpected press release Sunday afternoon, tech billionaire Elon Musk announced that Twitter would no longer be Twitter. "Updog is an infinitely better name," he said when asked for comment. "This way all Twitter users know that they're my bitches and they have to ask me how my day is going. It's going bad, by the way."
Shareholders have filed complaints that they were not informed of this bold rebranding strategy prior to the announcement, have to hear the... (screencap ends)]
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orkpup · 9 months
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want them to beat the shit out of me honestly
#howls#long tags teehee#they pretended to punch my face earlier and ive been thinking about that since#i mentioned that aside from hickeys and being bitten and i rarely ever bruise#and any scars i get fade very quickly#the look on their face was like that was a challenge to them#maybe it is#i joked that i was the perfect victim expecting them to not like that joke#but they thought it was funny and now im sitting here like. please make me victim to you#i wanna Fight them i want them to beat me and i wanna try my hardest to fight back in earnest#and i want them to overpower me and win and make me their victim#i want them to keep track of the things that i mention trigger me and eventually use them against me#i want them to force me into fight or fawn#and they can do all their cute and sweet aftercare things after the fact#but i want to feel scared of them#i want to create a fake safeword to use when i normally would want to safeword but dont want them to stop just yet#and i want them to laugh at me and make me cry and use me until theyre too tired to continue#which i can only imagine would feel like fucking forever for me#the stamina on that mf.. when he picked me up to fuck me better i actually screamed#creating a habit of fucking me fully awake when he sees me waking up..#and im meant to not get obsessed with him.. ok#also intentional aftercare in name isnt foreign to me but its definitely something to get used to because just something as simple as him-#holding me and telling me i did good after violent sex meant the world to me#crazy
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iloveyoumorethansoup · 4 months
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Today I learned that essays and written work isn’t that hard. I just have adhd
#not in the funny haha quirky way#as in. I’m finally getting a diagnosis and got to try adderall and what would usually take me a week to write I wrote in 7 hours#it’s not that bad when you don’t write a sentence and go god I hate this! and take a 40 minute doom scroll break#like. thank god there’s something that works!! definitely made me nauseous and kinda gave me a headache. head might’ve been from no sleep#i finished out the semester#and still helped my ex study til one after 2 huge assignments#that’s crazy. usually I can’t form a sentence after 1#i was able to just. do stuff#thought. i should quit doom scrolling. and just closed the app??#and this is a normal thing people can just do#which sounds so fake but also. man. screw that. ur telling me that if someone when I was younger actually referred me to get tested I could#have had this sooner?? that I didn’t have to suffer for 20 years first???#it’s a really weird feeling. my head was just quiet. no loud obnoxious thoughts. when something did cross my mind I easily pushed it away#i was even more creative. i had ideas and I remembered them long enough to write down. it didn’t just slide right off#i didn’t go oh god my room is a mess I cannot work if the vibes are off#i didn’t even need music#i just up and worked#my ex kept popping in my room and laying down with me and I didn’t immediately jump into bed with her and take a 5 hour nap#i was able to talk to her and do work#and get up and sit with her for a little and go back to work#this is like. genuinely life changing#now I just need to find a good dose#probably not til January. i don’t need meds if#no. no. i definitely don’t function in general. i was gonna say I’m fine until there’s homework#and then I remembered laundry#however I still can’t do anything til I get back from Christmas break cause I gotta go thru my college#but there’s hope! next up is anti depressants#soup talks
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sylhea-raemi · 1 year
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songs i think would be nice akian covers
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troublcmakcrs · 7 months
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//the only real goth kids are tweek, heidi, and stan. all the other ones are faking it
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wolves-etc · 1 year
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hello please have some "actually a half-vampire just not aware of it" anton au thoughts
(virgil is human and clueless because I refuse for this to be otherwise)
goldblum figures it out and takes anton aside the second time he's brought in for questioning like "dude, are you okay? you got fake fangs instead of using your real vampire ones, you don't need those, you can just— wait, why are you crying—"
(goldblum's either a vampire himself or, to borrow a thing that's too good not to borrow & because it fits the gleefully-open-minded-about-fringe-shit vibe, he dated a vampire once)
@darkfinch had this LOVELY idea for the vampire intiates to stick together as a community post-canon and to my mind, what makes that better here is if most of 'em turn out to be real vampires to some degree - or Something Else, or just Aware of this shit. they're in it for the fun, for the local community, for the "yeah this is bullshit but some of it's fun bullshit and it's funny to see how bad at it the leader is."
when they manage to corner anton (freaking out quietly in his loft) (his whole world shattered in pieces around him) (goldblum gave him a number to call to answer some questions but the poor guy's petrified) half of them are like "we thought you knew and were just trying to blend in!" and half are like "we were trying to figure out how to tell you!!" and it's just this mess of supportive-but-worried chaos.
...and anton, betrayed, off-kilter, already primed to question the programming of the last year or so has some people to help set him on the right track.
this ALSO sets us up for a thing. :) a thing where maybe goldblum looks the other way (an actual acknowledgement by the still-shitty cops in this shitty cop show of how awful the situation is) or there's a terribly unfortunate powercut and a few of the initiates get to pay virgil a visit.
they admit it to anton while very drunk a year or so later and he laughs so hard he cries <3
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