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tendercoretroglodyke · 3 years

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... I’m interested in legitimately gay Reese (I assume one piece of evidence is “look at what they’re doing and tell me you’re not gay”)

okay this is like 2 days late but this is why reese malcolminthemiddle is legitimately gay:

(side note: did anyone need a queer media thesis paper or something... I am willing to share lmao)

so none of this is like... rock solid evidence or anything but I need to believe at least one main character of a show is gay and/or trans to maintain interest and reese is the most plausible gay character. also it’s early 2000′s so he just gets a lot of vaguely homophobic jokes lmao

first of all, yes, the biggest piece of evidence he’s gay is those lines from that episode I quoted the other day--thinking malcolm is gay, he tries to show his support by giving him a gay porno: “’Naught Pool Boys 3!’ I watched 10 or 12 of these, and this one seems to have the most stuff you guys like.” and when malcolm says he isn’t gay, reese responds “Malcolm. Check out what those guys are doing in that movie, and THEN tell me you’re not gay.”-- so, 1) reese sat down and watched like a dozen gay porn movies to ““find a good one for his gay brother”” and 2) he thinks malcolm would reconsider his heterosexuality if he watched what was in that movie, implying that HE reconsidered his sexuality after watching that movie, or at the very least found it hot

in the same episode, the character tricking malcolm into thinking reese is gay lists the following as evidence: he obsesses over his hair and his looks, loves his gourmet cooking, has a bunch of magazines covered in comically muscular men, and that he’s angry and acts like a jerk because he’s “dealing with something weird and confusing.” now obviously, the obsession with hair/looks can be chalked up to the fact that he’s a teenage boy, and there’s nothing inherently gay about enjoying cooking. the dozen magazines of muscle-bound men could certainly be taken as gay evidence, though, and it IS established in the show that his entire bully persona is his way of masking his inner feelings and insecurities. there’s literally a whole episode where he & malcolm realize they have no friends because they act like little shits to push people away because they’re afraid of rejection and/or abandonment from their peers. they ostracize themselves before they can be ostracized by the other students at school. I could probably write a whole other essay on reese’s psyche tbqh lmao there’s a shocking amount there!!

of the brothers who are actually old enough to be attracted to girls (reese, malcolm, and francis), he shows the least interest. now bear with me here. you might be thinking, “well, yeah, it’s malcolm’s show, we’re not gonna see things from other people’s perspective!” but that is actually surprisingly untrue, the show is very much equally shown from each family members’ perspectives. starting about s2, when malcolm is in early middle school, he starts getting crushes on girls and pursuing them. francis goes after a few women in the first couple seasons and then marries a woman we see a lot throughout the show.

in the roughly... 130?? episodes I have watched so far, nearly all of reese’s “interest” in girls involve either: competition with malcolm, genuinely just liking her as a friend, or some completely ulterior motive. the only exception to this I can think of is in the early seasons where he has a crush on a cheerleader and tries to get on her good side by joining the cheerleading squad, which the writers clearly set up as a way to make gay jokes about reese. let me give you a few examples of his relationships with girls

the first relationship we see him in is with a “stupid girl” that malcolm tried (and failed) to date, and the main reason they get together is that they think on the same wavelength and genuinely seem to enjoy hanging out. they take breaks from their bro chats to make out every once in a while. eventually he gets her to break up with him because he doesn’t want to go to the school dance with her (he doesn’t want to go at all). years later, he’s dating some girl we meet for like 5 minutes, before he goes to confess to her that she’s the first girl he’s ever loved. she then breaks up with him. he’s sad, but taking it fairly well. he’s about to leave when he sees malcolm hiding under the bed, and learns that he stole his girlfriend. he then runs away to join the army. he was clearly MUCH more upset that his brother stole his girlfriend than he was that his girlfriend broke up with him. there are many more instances of him and malcolm competing for a girl’s affections, and he seems mostly motivated by the competition itself.

in addition to “stupid girl,” he also manufactures an “attraction” to his female army buddy in the last season. the premise of this episode is that his old army buddy (a girl he play-wrestles with and insults like he would his own brothers) comes to visit him, and malcolm convinces reese that she’s attracted to him, and that reese’s nervousness at learning that fact is proof he’s in love with her. there’s a misunderstanding where reese asks her if she has certain “feelings” and she says she does, but what she ACTUALLY means is that she has a crush on reese’s MOM. she’s a lesbian. reese later propositions her (saying he’s saved his virginity for this--he’s probably about 18 here), and when she says omg no im gay, he is HUGELY relieved they can go back to being friends. CLASSIC mlm/wlw friendship moment.

there’s an episode where these cute girls pick up reese (& nerds) to kiss in front of their boyfriends to make them jealous. reese is all for it, and when malcolm argues that it’s not worth his dignity and the beating he’ll get from the girl’s boyfriend, reese counters that that’s WHY he wants to do this--he’s completely invisible at school, and thinks getting beaten up for kissing some guy’s girlfriend will at least make him known around school. at no point does he indicate he’s actually attracted to this girl, and when it comes time to kiss her, he finds the weakest excuse to run away at the last minute.

im not gonna list all of these but there’s more lmao

the following is a random assortment of one-off gay jokes and out-of-context lines with gay reese implications, often homophobically bc its early 2000′s writing:

says “I’m gay” to a girl to give malcolm a better shot at her

(again in competition with malcolm) tries to flirt with a girl by spraying milk in her face as the punchline to a joke, which is. well. hm. self-sabotaging, to say the least!!

Reese: “Do you think it’s right to totally change who you are and turn your back on EVERYTHING you believe in, just to impress a hot guy??” [his dad gives a long, blank stare, before asking:] “...Burt Reynolds hot, or Sting hot?”

“YEAH I like clouds! I call them sky kittens :)” (I just think that one’s sweet!)

“Look, Christie, here’s the thing. When I first met you, I was just messing around. But we’ve gotten so close that, now... I really like you! I can’t keep this up anymore. I’m not the person you think I am. I’ve been pretending since the day I met you. It’s so hard having to constantly cover my tracks to keep my story straight... and I don’t WANT to anymore! I’m tired of living this lie! I’m done with it. I’m sorry.”

he catfishes some guy to blackmail him, but is implied to continue the flirtation even after the catfishing/blackmail is revealed

reese is, technically, married to a man. this particular plot point is played as a joke and manages to be both racist and homophobic, so I won’t go into it. but I believe he is still married to that man. technically.

reese takes care of a huge box full of caterpillars until they pupate and become beautiful butterflies. I feel like there’s some kind of gay coming out metaphor here somewhere.

I think there are a couple other times where he comments on a guy’s attractiveness but I couldn’t find specific instances.

In conclusion: Reese is a deeply repressed gay kid who was socialized SO thoroughly as an early 2000′s straight boy that, despite his attraction for men and his obvious compulsory heterosexuality, he still cannot admit to himself that he is gay even as he enters adulthood. Furthermore, his subconscious frustration about this fact is turned outward to form the “schoolyard bully” costume he uses to mask his insecurities and keep others from getting too close to him.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. I could be convinced to come back for another talk about how Dewey is trans or about how each and every member of that family is neurodivergent in entirely different ways. Assuming anyone has read this far in the first place!!

#sorry this was so long lmao I legit spent 2 hours on this #I have 2 modes: not doing the thing and overdoing the thing #hey anon if you actually see this I'd appreciate a quick message saying so lmao I'd hate to write all this only for you to miss it #I'll probably rb sometime tomorrow at least #also liz if you're reading this i was GONNA add a bit about francis' gay potential like you mentioned but I ran out of steam so remind me t #i think reese has the most gay potential tho #mitm #malcolm in the middle #anonymous #Anonymous

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berkowitzbrat · 3 years

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Berkowitz and the Inverted Electra

Hello! Well, this is where i’ve been all this time. This post required a lot of sourcing and research, and therefore a lot of time, because it’s very theoretical. Anyway, here’s my magnum opus. Enjoy.

An Electra Complex is defined by the psychosexual relationship between a girl (or, in the ‘inverted’ sense, a boy) and her (his) mother, coupled with a sexual desire to possess their father. Oedipal and Electral urges originate during the Phallic (3rd) stage of psychosexual development.

As a male, Berkowitz would be expected to cleave to the Oedipal urges to kill his father/possess his mother; however, I don’t think this is the case. The Phallic stage takes place between the ages of 3-6 years old, around the time that Berkowitz was informed of his biological mother’s death, and his biological father’s abandonment of him. This, coupled with the continuous image of death surrounding women as he was growing up [1], helped to solidify this inverted Electral urge, the fascination with death&women and possession&men. In terms of possession and men, Berkowitz would have thought that only his biological father was still alive, and this developed (particularly later in his life) a great need to find his father, to reclaim some part of himself, and rid himself of the guilt he felt for driving his father away after (as he thought) killing his mother [2]. Another scenario during which he exhibited possession&men linked directly to death/control&women was when he would be taken to indoor pools and witnessed the thrall and power which men held over women, particulalry in situations in which there is sexual subtext, such as changing rooms [3].

So, great. He’s attracted to the same sex (more on this later) and death&women are interdependent concepts for him. What next? For Freud, it’s the Latency stage. This stage begins at age 7 and continues until puberty, which for boys is around 12/13 years old. This is the stage at which the Oedipal/Electral complexes begin to dissolve in order to decrease the tension and take on their gender role (whatever that may be) as the child realises that sexual gratification exists without, not within, their parents. At this stage is usually when the child begins to become more comfortable with the same sex parent--but David has always been more attracted to the idea of his biological father, as it is all he has. It could be said, then, that the Electra complex was forced upon him by circumstance, the circumstance of his adoptive-father’s lie about his biological parents. Regardless, Berkowitz eventually becomes very close to his adoptive mother, Pearl, and began to vie for her attention, such as poisoning her parakeets in order to have nothing to compete with for her affection [4]. The typical progression of Berkowitz is entirely inverted in terms of Freudian psychosexual stages. This is a stage of negated sexuality, hence the attatchment, traditionally, to the parent of the same sex, and to make friends of the same sex; however, because Freud’s an asshole, he doesn’t consider that ✨homosexuality✨ is a concept and thinks that all children must go to the parent/friends of the same sex as sexuality cannot be prompted here. But we can take liberties here because we live in the real world. There’s nothing abnormal about Berkowitz, he was just following the pyschosexual stages as somebody interested in the same sex.

Woah! You say. But he killed women because of pent-up sexual frustration! The gun is his penis!

Sure. For most; but I’ve always felt that Berkowitz did things a little bit... differently.

The Genital stage, or the final stage, begins at puberty (12/13) and continues/ends into adulthood. As traumatising as Pearl’s death was for David, her death coincided perfectly for her metaphorical death in the psyche of 13-year-old David. During the Genital stage, sexuality is no longer ‘hidden’ (latent), and rather becomes a thing necessary to be fulfilled for emotional release. Attention turns once more to the gender in which one is interested, and David, growing up in the culture that he did, turned to women. At 15, he had his first sexual experience, a blowjob, and sources (unknown) state that he preferred ‘oral sex and petting over regular intercourse’[5]. It would be plausible that he perhaps came to prefer this, considering his one known experience with ‘regular intercourse’ resulted in a venereal disease, but I’ve always contended that maybe he preferred so-called ‘petting’ due to his... less favourable position with heterosexuality. But, as I said, I feel as if David did not explore, or rather felt he could not explore, his sexuality until later on in his life (and, even then, due to his Baptist beliefs, promoted homophobic views because, y’know, Christianity and being born in the 50s) and was, in fact, more interested in men than women. If this is grabbing at straws for anyone, I will mention his ‘homosexual fling’ [6] with inmate Gary Evans, who was long suspected to be bisexual/homosexual due to his collecting of gay magazines and, according to Hugo Harmatz, ‘love letters’[citation needed] from Berkowitz stashed amongst them.

An addendum about Berkowitz’s latent stage: when he was around 10 years old, his parents had sex whilst he was in the same bed [8]. What could be more confusing, traumatising, and shaping, than your parents doing... that... during one of the most sexually devoid periods of your life! I believe this shaped his view of performance hugely. He was shown, at a formative period, that it was okay to perform in a sexually motivated manner whilst other people were around--non-consenting other people, at that. I believe that this is the reason he took his killing out into the open. It was a sexual thrill, the killings. It was heavily related to the sexual negation of wanting to kill your mother in order to possess your father. I am by no means saying that this is Berkowitz’s 100% proven, uncontestable motive, but the ideas of psychosexual analysis seem to apply to him in an accurate and very curious way. The traditional, heterosexual view of these stages do not match up to his psychology, but the homosexual interpretation does.

So, we move forward to his early 20s. He returns from Korea, looking for his father, the only piece of his biological existence he believes to be alive. He still wishes, all these years later, to possess the father--the destruction of the woman has only intensified after multiple failed attempts at dating, a horrendous virginity-loss experience, and the frustration surrounding an attempt at heterosexuality. But, here we stand: his biological mother is alive, and his biological father is the one who is dead. How terribly, terribly confusing. And still, Berkowitz attempts a relationship with his biological mother and half-sister. This goes south, however, when he discovers that he was given up due to being born out of wedlock, and he drops contact with his biological family.

The disollusionment is unfathomable. His biological father, his raison d’etre, is dead. His adoptive father has moved to Florida with his new wife: this new wife has fulfiled Berkowitz’s Electra Complex, in his mind, at least. Kill the mother. Take the father. His biological mother is not who he wanted to have. His adoptive mother is dead. What is left? A display of fulfilment, sexual fulfilment, as public as it has always been shown to him--through the bedroom of his parents, through the public changing rooms. Murder on the streets. Getting to kill a woman as he always thought he had been decreed to from birth, from his first supposed mother, his biological mother.

(bibliography under the cut. thank you for reading)

Bibliography:

Radford University: Berkowitz, David [3, 8]

Simply Psychology: 5 Stages of Psychosexual Development

Tumblr/Berkowitzbrat: Exploring the Why [1]

Tumblr/True Crime and Cannibalism: David Berkowitz’s Timeline [5]

Westchester Magazine: David Berkowitz’s History in Westchester County [4]

Wikipedia: Phallic stage, Latency stage, Genital stage

Wordpress/Can’t Stop the Bleeding: How to Stuff a Wild Bikini [6]

Youtube: David Berkowitz: In His Own Words (1/9) [2]

And here’s my whole folder of resources for general Berkowitz reading materials and media: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1VKlZJwRR4bpoPzO7AejAMtAJaVoBGuTg

#psychology #david berkowitz #son of sam #holy shit i'm back!!!#freudian elements #freud #analysis #electra #oedipus #adoptive parents #biological parents #discourse welcome

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phoenixyfriend · 3 years

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I am seized by a fatal need for courtroom ninja drama fic

But not serious courtroom drama. I'm talking Phoenix Wright style Nonsense.

(Some of this was provided by the folks over in @sloaners‘ server, but the bulk of it was me spitballing nonsense at people who actually know the games, which I do not. I do paraphrase a few times to make it more feasible as a tumblr post/fic concept, rather than a rapidfire text conversation.)

Or one of those like. Reality TV paternity test things? But specifically in my mind the people involved in the actual paternity are a married couple and someone that joined them to be their third, and Clan Elders are throwing a fit about how the baby might not be the heir by blood! while the actual parents are like "I could not care less, this is our child, all three of us, please stop getting involved."

HashiMitoMada would be a VERY good option for the paternity nonsense, mostly because I can see Madara screeching at his own elders about how he already said Izuna would be his heir and he's not changing his mind!

Tobirama is just begging the paternity test to work faster off-screen because he's the only person with the machines to make it happen.

(Hashirama is just. Moping in a corner.)

"I just had to INVENT a paternity test that works before the birth! I had to figure out how to test amniotic fluid! If you assholes make me do something this stupid on such short notice again, I will be digging some shallow graves!" "...for who?" "I haven't decided yet."

Anyway, jumping back to like a Phoenix Wright-style murder investigation.

The victim was Danzo. Even the prosecution isn't actually that interested in making sure someone gets arrested, but they're legally obligated to do at least try. A bunch of people all acting really suspicious about who killed him. There is at least one shitty fake mustache-on-glasses disguise to provide a paper-thin alibi.

WAIT The other thing this gives us is ninjas in three-piece-suits but half of them wear the suits wrong. I’m talking mismatched buttons. The wrong way of tying their tie. Sewn-on-cufflinks. This is Naruto, for instance.

Tobirama would wear it properly, except he's rushing about in a lab coat, screaming at everyone to get out of his way because he's The Entire Forensics Team.

(This is the part where I have to confess that I have only seen the live-action movie of Phoenix Wright, as I don't game, so I just have the live action and tumblr osmosis.)

At this point, of course, we gotta ask: Who is the most Belligerent Witness And who is the Helpful™️ Witness that's super enthusiastic but entirely useless

I can see, say, Mito being a solid witness that both defense and prosecution are really thankful for.

Modern gen you have like... Sasuke and Neji are both incredibly belligerent witnesses. Neji at least is polite about it but pulls the "only answers with the absolute minimum of information."

Lee and Gai would have the over enthusiasm but forget to say actual vital testimony until pressed, and Naruto would love to help but might not be entirely sure what the case even is.

Shikamaru falls asleep when the lawyers consult their partners. Prosecution A consults Prosecution B for thirty-seven seconds, then turns around and the witness is asleep at the stand.

Tobi (as in Obito with mask) is an incredibly frustrating witness. They have to declare a recess just so all the lawyers can recover their blood pressure. "Can we please get someone up on the stand with this guy as a handler? I'm--I'm going to explode."

Gaara: Helpful. Polite. Answers with detail. Answers the spirit of the question as well as the letter. Includes more detail. That's too much detail. Gaara please stop telling us about the sounds that bones make.

His testimony just drags on forever.

Ninken can and will take the stand! Pakkun even enjoys it! Some ninken require translators.

ABURAME TRANSLATING FOR A RANDOM GIANT CENTIPEDE THAT WITNESSED A MURDER IN THE FOREST OF DEATH

There are arguments about whether or not the testimony can count since nobody else can confirm the translation except Other Aburame so how do they know the Aburame aren't part of the coverup.

"Okay, so this Danzo guy had like fifty shell companies but I think I found the route that leads back to him?" "Nah, that one goes to a guy that died eighty years ago that's still collecting pensions: his family lied and said he was still alive for the money." "Fuck!"

Also I just. I love the idea of Sasuke and Madara being the exact opposite kind of belligerent witness.

Also, Orochimaru answers with pretty much the exact kind of wording as Gaara, but where Gaara is trying to be helpful and provide detail for the sake of the case, and failing to see that it's maybe not necessary, Orochimaru just wants to see people squirm. ...similar thing happens with Sakura and Kabuto. Similar phrasing, very different energy.

I keep picturing all of Team Taka as part of Forensics and Evidence Collecting ajshakshjd

Juugo, holding up a rabbit: I found a witness.

Karin joins forensics and Tobirama nearly weeps from joy until he finds her criminal record "Shit, that was supposed to get thrown out when I turned eighteen."

Tobirama: I asked for an assistant, not a criminal. Karin: I'm on parole. Tobirama: That makes things worse. Karin: I know how to use a [concerningly advanced machine that I, a business major, cannot name]. Tobirama: ...never mind, I'm keeping you.

Karin: I know how to DNA sequence AND use LA-ICP-MS Tobirama: [weeps with joy]

Suigetsu would be great at blood splatter analysis. ...I think I read somewhere that blood spatter analysis is actually over in 'fake science that's pushed by cops and media but actually doesn't work' BUT apparently it’s in the Ace Attorney games so we’re going to ignore reality a bit. We’ve already got dogs and rabbits and centipedes as witnesses, what’s a bit of blood spatter?

He's also probably really good at cause of death stuff? Like looking at corpse and figuring out how long it took the victim to die, which blow did it, whether any damage was inflicted post-mortem, etc.

Sasuke is usually too busy playing Belligerent Witness but sometimes goes to join Taka for... uh... reasons.

Juugo: [takes the stand] Lawyer: Hey, uh, why's that Uchiha guy with him? The witness-- Judge: No, no, we need Uchiha Sasuke on hand when questioning Expert Animal Handler Juugo. Lawyer: ...why? Judge: Property damage.

(Sasuke as a work partner with Juugo, also moonlighting as a witness/suspect in Danzo's murder.)

One time they need Juugo but can't find him even though court is already in session and he said he'd be here, turns out he was lured away by Kakashi's army of dogs. Kakashi didn't notice until he turned to ask Pakkun if he could help find the missing expert.

Juugo is a decent lab assistant, I think?

Anyway.

Tobirama taking on Team Taka as his forensics team while Orochimaru is... hm... traveling the country to promote his new autobiography, which is outselling the newest Icha Icha to Jiraiya's ire.

Sloane suggested “a case where it's all the Sannin as suspects in a murder. They would be THE WORST, say... the murder of Hanzo.”

To which I suggested “The Sannin are all suspects but the people on trial are the Ame trio, maybe?”

Which garnered the response of “It could be a surprise upset IN COURT that the trio should be on trial.”

We love a court upset.

Suigetsu finds out that the cause of death was actually an entirely natural heart attack, but while he was determining this, the rest of the team and the lawyers found like eight conspiracies by Zetsu, three by Danzo, four by Orochimaru, and an entire network of nonsense by Sasori.

INO IS THE PSYCHIC. I know her thing in canon is reading minds but pls. Ino is Maya. The Spirit Medium.

Is the judge: 1. Hiruzen 2. Hashirama 3. Hagoromo 4. Mifune 5. The Daimyou

(Old dude with authority, optionally easily distracted/questionably competent. I'd have gone for impressive facial hair but only Mifune and Hagoromo have more than like... Hiruzen's weird soul patch.)

It's not a soul patch but I don't know what facial hair is called and I can't just call it a goat beard

Response commentary was as follows: The Daimyou would unfortunately be closer to the personality of the ace attorney judge, more blindly agreeing with things that sound good :joy: Hiruzen could be fun if only for the competing facial hair for a beard, yes xD Hagoromo would possibly be most buckwild tho WELCOME TO MOON COURT

I managed to get this far with like... NO idea who the judges were except “IDK maybe Kakashi?” but consider:

...HashiMada rival lawyers

Dropping over to Izuna vs. Touka for when Hashirama and Madara inevitably become suspects of something or other themselves and have to be witnesses.

(Tobirama's too busy running blood tests, Anija, let Touka handle it, she's better at people anyway.)

...Hashirama is like. Marginally more put-together than Madara, right? So that... makes him Edgeworth... somehow... That feels wrong but Madara as Edgeworth feels even more wrong.

Madara is very into screaming OBJECTION

ALSO consider: Friction when a doctor from a nearby hospital gets called in to provide expert testimony on something because Karin is like "no hey I should be the one doing this" and then she sees how cute Sakura is.

But also at some point Kakashi vs. Gai for a nonsense case. Their personalities are both VERY FUN for this sort of thing.

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asteroiideae · 3 years

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okay, so I don’t make these kinds of posts often because tbh I’m a little lazy and very tired like 24/7 lmao but I’ve been seeing a lot of Pride reading lists hit my dash (and they’re excellent, and I save them all!) buuuut reading books is still a roadblock I’m struggling to mentally overcome -- and audiobooks are great, but they take 84 years (sometimes literally???) to get through. so! I thought I’d share a (very tiny) list of the queer manga I’ve read this year that you might enjoy for Pride, with some descriptions/trigger warnings/thoughts to go with them. so here we go in no particular order other than where they sit on my bookshelf:

What Did You Eat Yesterday? by Fumi Yoshinaga

okay so I know I go on about this manga at literally every presented opportunity, but I honestly just can’t help myself??? as a thirty-something queer adult, I really love the quiet maturity of this relationship between Shiro and Kenji; especially when it’s highlighted by references to shenanigans of their youth, and the ways in which they are still growing as both individuals and a couple. I’ve only read the first six volumes but I’m OBSESSED.

Status: Ongoing (17 volumes; 15 translated) Summary: Shiro and Kenji are an established adult couple with separate careers and interests, whose relationship is depicted over the meals cooked for them by Shiro. This doesn’t have an overarching plot, which might be off-putting for some readers; each chapter can be compared to a fanfic one-shot, usually containing it’s own tiny storyline or theme. It’s literally just domestic moments and meals shared between these men. Warnings: While I didn’t personally have a problem with this, younger readers might find some of the dated terms offensive. If you’ve spent any time with older queer folks (older as in 45-50+) this won’t be anything you aren’t used to, but if your experience of queer folx skews younger or online, you might get taken by surprise. There’s also some internalized homophobia; and by some I mean quite a bit. Shiro’s personal arc (at least in the first six volumes) heavily revolves around how much he closets himself and tries desperately to pass as “normal” in Japanese business culture.

Boys Run The Riot by Keito Gaku

holy shit holy shit holy SHIT. this story is so good??? so VERY good??? I was a little cautious, and a little bit uninterested in a story about teens (only because I’m in my thirties and crave more adult representation,) but I was VERY WRONG to be. Boys Run The Riot is beautifully drawn, beautifully written, and probably my favorite work on this list. the mangaka is also trans so the inherent understanding and nuance of our protagonist’s experience is really lovely. Also featuring a fantastic brotp between a trans boy and his new himbo bestie; no seriously if you want a story about a trans boy getting to have good broships with other boys his own age I CANNOT stress this enough. Volume two is releasing next month; I have it preordered. I’m laying on my floor wishing for time to hurry the fuck up. I need more of this smol angry trans boy and his big soft himbo bff. PLS. Status: Ongoing (4 volumes published; 2 translated) Summary: Ryo Watari is a second year high school student who is trans and struggling to feel comfortable with his very rigidly structured life at school, at home, and among his friends (to whom he is not out.) By chance he meets Jin Sato, a cis boy who also feels outcast (often judged for his appearance without any deeper thought.) When Ryo comes out to Jin in a state of frustration, Jin accepts who Ryo is and makes an offer -- why not start a fashion line that subverts all the expectations that have been put on them both; why not express themselves even when they’ve been told they shouldn’t. Warnings: Ryo is struggling with gender dysphoria, and it is written by someone who has probably experienced it, so it might be a little real for any trans folks who deal with that. Also, while neither the narrative nor Jin misgender Ryo (at least, not once he expresses to Jin that he is a man), Ryo is not out to anyone else and so he frequently is misgendered at school and we see how badly that impacts him and the way he views himself and processes his emotions. Ryo spends a lot of time being angry and trying to swallow it down, and that can be very raw to witness at times. There is also a depiction of unsafe binding (though the mangaka has an immediate note about binding safety, and goes further in-depth at the back of the manga.)

Our Dining Table by Mita Ori

okay, so I was a bit on the fence about whether or not I wanted to include this as a rec, but I decided that it might actually been what someone wants or needs, so here it is! while I really enjoyed this concept, and I’m always a sucker for found family stories (let me tell you I’m queer without telling you I’m queer, much?) it feels like this story is a bit rushed at times, and the romantic relationship between our protagonists is very blink and you’ll miss it. I don’t even want to call it subtle so much as it is just not remotely the focus of the story so it’s a little startling when it happens. but! if you’re looking for a story about adults processing grief and trauma together, and learning how to care for another person (and as a result, learning how to care for themselves,) this is a nice read that isn’t too heavy! Status: Complete (one volume) Summary: Yutaka is a salaryman whose past experiences prevent him from reaching out to others, even through something so simple as sharing a meal. Despite this is REALLY loves to cook, and wishes he had a reason to do it more often. Then he meets Minoru, and his muuuuuch younger brother Tane (it’s like a 17 year age gap between the brothers?) and finds himself teaching them how to cook, and overcoming his fear of eating in front of others. Warnings: Good news, there’s no overt homophobia in this story! Bad news, the other trauma makes up for it! We have a lot of trauma surrounding parental death, childhood bullying, and adoption; in addition to an actual fear of eating in front of others.

Our Dreams at Dusk / Shimanami Tasogare by Yuhki Kamatani

this is the first manga series I collected, and I’m still very pleased about that. the art is ABSOLUTELY stunning? the use of visual imagery and surreal analogies to explain queerness is fucking on POINT. I cried so hard during a couple of these volumes I developed a migraine. I only have one piece of critique on the whole thing (addressed in the warnings,) and I intend to do another re-read when I’m ready for the catharsis of sobbing into my pillow again. Like Boys Run The Riot, Our Dreams at Dusk is drawn and written by a member of the queer community (a non-binary mangaka, this time,) and as a result it hits pretty fucking close to home in a lot of ways. while I really love this series it’s super not for the faint of heart, you WILL come out of this reading experience with some things to unpack. Status: Completed (4 volumes; 4 translated) Summary: We mostly follow Tasuku Kaname, as he is outted at school by a classmate as being homosexual, and his initial despair and subsequent journey of acceptance. In this process, Tasuku finds himself at a drop-in center, which seems to primarily function as a safe space for queer people; we meet several lesbians, an elderly gay man, a trans character, and a young character who isn’t ready for any kind of label because they are still ??? about themselves and their identity. Each of these “secondary” characters is given room to breathe and to work through difficulties of their own while Tasuku watches and learns that even though life is hard sometimes, there’s beauty to be found in one’s own strength. Warnings: hoooo boy; well there’s all kinds of homophobia and transphobia; a character is outted against their will (multiple times), there’s some really insidious transphobia covered by “concern”, there’s internalized homophobia everywhere, and a very complicated asexual character whose presentation left me (as an ace) with super mixed feelings and a lot of frustration (though I wouldn’t call it bad necessarily; just wanted to put that out there for my fellow asexual folks.) If you have read (or go on to read!) any of these, please let me know! I’d love to chat about the stories, and hear your thoughts on them -- because we’re a broad/diverse community and our own experiences shape us differently and give us different insights. <3 ANYWAY, for those of you who read this monstrous self-indulgent post, thank you! Feel free to add any queer manga you’ve been reading below - I’m always on the hunt for more recs!

#happy pride #manga recs #gay representation #queer representation #trans characters #asexual characters #gay characters #everything in-between tbh

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marnz · 3 years

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pausing my “”productive”” evening to be briefly insane with rage at this extremely stupid, imprecise, and ignorant essay about garth greenwell and ocean vuong, holy shit, i guess punching down is quite easy when you don’t even feel the need to make a point.

i haven’t finished On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous so I cannot speak to that aspect of the essay other than to say 1) the prose is amazing 2) writing to reach someone is the main function of a writer, you need to approach an emotional work in an emotionally open and receptive manner, 3) the critiques of the novel come across as jealous and a purposefully mean spirited reading. however,

if you READ What Belongs to You, if you READ Cleanness, you understand WHY these books are so sincere and WHY there is so much “”gay suffering”” and it is because the narrator fucking hates himself. This is not a secret. Greenwell’s primary aesthetic project in these books is tackling the intersections of shame and desire. What causes intense shame? The fact that the narrator’s father treated him horribly for his entire life because the narrator is sexually attracted to men--and so Greenwell explores gay sex and intimacy. I don’t think this could have been made more apparent? In the middle section of What Belongs to You the narrator reflects on his relationship with his dying father, and begins by discussing the innocent and familial intimacy between the two of them that vanished immediately when the father realized the narrator was gay, as a child.

The narrator is “”sincere”” and confessional about everything as a way to convey the intersections of shame and desire using prose that mirrors the looping, sometimes ponderous thought process of the self loathing. He is capable of reflecting on his terrible qualities and unsafe sexual choices, his obsession with self endangerment through sex and his self blame/culpability, because he thinks there is something not only inherently wrong with him, but inherently unlovable. This is something he obsesses about and it is why partially why the book reads as confessional (the other reason is it is the contemporary modern style. Almost every celebrated litfic novelist is doing it nowadays.) Sex is linked danger, shame, and rejection over and over again for the narrator and he struggles to move on from it because it’s all he thinks he deserves! The craft decision to use sex as a way to explore not just shame/desire but the narrator’s character is incredible! More people should do this! In one of the most harrowing chapters of Cleanness, “Gospodar,” the narrator goes to a professional dom and confesses to wanting to become “nothing.” He explicitly engages in humiliation play. Enough said!

The whole “gay suffering gay man sad” thing is NOT done as suffering for shock value or because it’s a sincere belief in what gay people deserve. This was a common critique of What Belongs to You and I agree it’s thankless to read if you went into it expecting gay Pretty Woman or a happy ending, l m a o, especially since one of the other craft projects of the novel is using Mitko to symbolize Bulgaria post iron curtain/””communism.”” Greenwell then uses Cleanness address the gay suffering critiques by exploring the narrator’s relationship with R....and these chapters are absolutely beautiful and moving and healing for the narrator, he finally gets to say shit like:

“Sex had never been joyful for me before, or almost never, it had always been fraught with shame and anxiety and fear, all of which vanished at the sight of his smile, simply vanished, it poured a cleanness over everything we did” and

“I caught my breath at [something R did for him], I felt a weird pressure and heat climb my throat. I felt like my heart would burst, those were the words for it, the hackneyed phrase, and I was grateful for them, they were a container for what I felt, proof of its commonness. I was grateful for that, too, the commonness of my feeling; I felt some stubborn strangeness in me ease, I felt like part of the human race.”

I don’t think it’s ever confirmed that the narrator in What Belongs to You is the same narrator as Cleanness but I think they must be because of the social implications of cleanness as related to gay sex and to aspects of shame, especially because in part 3 of WBTY the narrator learns he has syphilis, which is a very publicly disfiguring disease if not treated. It’s sexual leprosy, it is disfiguring shame. We read all of Cleanness understanding certain actions he takes as being because of what happened to Mitko, like insisting on condoms. I think the choice of it being syphilis as opposed to AIDs is purposeful but that is another post i will not be making.

The relationship with R is doomed to fail partially because R also experiences immense shame connected to being gay for a different reason and because the narrator is predisposed to self sabotage and other various reasons. It does end, the narrator goes back to his dangerous sexual practices, and Greenwell is careful to show that part of the reason the narrator does this is because he finds social as well as sexual gratification from it. With R the narrator did not do any form of kink except body worship, but body worship is not what the narrator craves because he craves humiliation play! I think the thing that is most interesting about Cleanness in particular is the way it explores different avenues of intimacy, different modes, you can be with someone for a very long time and feel felt and loved and understood and then be with someone else and feel felt and loved and understood in different, equally important ways. Every single relationship in your life is a trade off of these and your own prioritization of your own needs. Greenwell shows that the narrator’s sexual practices and his love for kink is an important need just as it is a self destructive one because of the linking of shame and desire. This is all made explicit in “The Little Saint” (which we are given to understand is post-R) narrator acts as a dom for once and explores being on the other side of the coin. He gets into it and later finds it very upsetting because for him all shame and humiliation is linked to being gay, which circles back to his father, and the sub ends up explaining to the narrator that you don’t have to dominate someone by humiliating them like that. Like what’s not clicking here!!!!!!!

My other main frustrations with this essay are:

the linking of sincerity = gay trauma when good art is often about sincerity and sincerity of emotion, either exploring it or eliciting it, even satire, even fucking...marvel movies, lowest common denominator writing wise, try to make their fans feel something

the fact HE CLEARLY DIDN’T READ THE BOOKS. i know Cleanness is set up as a collection of short stories so you have to take it apart line by line but WBTY is not like that. The shame = bad dad aspect could not have been more clear if it was underlined.

The fact that the essay says Ocean Vuong “is an artist of the memorably obtuse one-liner” as a derogatory thing which is SO rude and comes across as incredibly petty and jealous. Ocean Vuong is a fucking genius. Go after Rupi Kaur if you want to critique a poet who is actually over celebrated, damn

the idea of sincerity = cringe and the inability of many modern critics to moderate their response to a piece of work based on the project or any of its other qualities it is doing instead of like, how it made them feel expressed as sarcastically as possible. I am not a critic but I do not think this is difficult to do. What Belongs to You made me incredibly uncomfortable and sad for much of the book but I was still able to appreciate it? Even when I was like “ahhhhh i hate this” I could understand and appreciate aspects of craft/characterization/emotion/prose/whatever. This is basic shit.

the fact this essay doesn’t even explore the craft genius of Cleanness? it is really subversive to use sex like that in litfic, let alone gay sex...like I understand not liking something just based on your personal tastes but I’m like ?????????? so shocked that the whole craft thing and aesthetic project just doesn’t come up???????? At all?????? ALSO YOU WOULD THINK in an essay that tries to cash in on the outrage of ‘all gay art is suffering’ would explore why the wealthy, straight, white publishing industry and literary elite does invest in gay suffering and the homophobia/history behind it but no! this essay doesn’t even do that!

the fact this got published at all

anyway this essay is stupid and i am stupid for typing up basically an essay about it but like! where else can i do this! if you read all the way to the end pls read Garth Greenwell and Ocean Vuong thanks bye

#i really do not get mad on the internet anymore as a rule but this.....#ugh and what drives me even crazier is i know this stupid fucking essay was published for hate clicks AND IT IS WORKING #garth greenwell #cleanness #homophobia tw #if someone comes to me and says these novels are like toxic and not morally pure uwu i am going to unhinge my jaw and swallow them whole #long post

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akari-hope · 3 years

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Not sure why you think that wlw are more shunned, viewed as predatory, and otherwise demonized than mlm relationships, particularly enemies to lovers dynamics? Sapphics are by and large wayyyyy more well-received than mlm. Sapphics are seen as soft and harmless and lovely even when they’re fighting, while mlm are seen as dirty and emasculated and generally viewed with complete disgust.

i said that mlm are FETISHIZED more in enemies to lovers dynamics than wlw. wlw are more DEMONIZED than mlm in enemies to lovers dynamics. and i gave clear examples of dynamics that reflect this in that post, so i'm not pulling this out of my ass. neither is good. both are bad. they're just different kinds of bad. i'm pretty sure i made that clear but if i didn't, i'm restating it now - NEITHER MLM NOR WLW ARE TREATED WELL IN MEDIA REGARDLESS OF DYNAMIC. THIS IS NOT OPPRESSION OLYMPICS. DIFFERENT PROBLEMS DOES NOT EQUAL BETTER PROBLEMS.

i am, however, a lesbian, and i'm going to be able to speak more coherently and authentically to the sapphic representation and general treatment of women in media than anything else. it's my firsthand experience and it's always going to be easier and more accurate than my musings on the experiences of other groups of people. and given that i have a particular fondness for enemies to lovers dynamics, of course i'm bound to contemplate sapphic enemies to lovers dynamics specifically.

but if we must dance this dance bc you decided to take a bad faith interpretation of my words, women have to do more to be loved in media, and they have to do far less to be hated. this is a fact plain and simple, and if you can't acknowledge that we are not even remotely on the same page. You can look at ANY piece of media and see this is true. the supernatural fandom's treatment of basically any women vs. the kingdom hearts fandom's treatment of kairi vs. the naruto fandom's treatment of sakura. etc. etc. etc. i could name examples all day. these are women who, yes, have shoddy writing, but instead of getting the same treatment of a male character with shoddy writing - immediately getting fleshed out by fans - they get set aside as annoying, bitchy, mary sues, etc. even female characters with GOOD writing will get this treatment, a la lightning farron from final fantasy xiii. male characters with the SAME EXACT TRAITS are often beloved by fans. easy example, see cloud strife from final fantasy vii, who shares a hysterically huge amount of personality traits with lightning farron.

and this is BEFORE we even get into the discussion of being sapphic, or god forbid any other type of minority. traditionally beautiful white cishet women who are feminine and kind are the only women to ever pass for general audiences, and even then it's not consistent. women must be "palatable". versus white men, who are allowed to be dark, messy, gritty, murderers, even genocidal dictators and still be beloved by fans. and yes, the qualifier of white is necessary here - men of color, especially black men, do not get this same generosity from fans, and you bet your fucking ass it goes triple for women of color.

and again, this is BEFORE WE EVEN FACTOR IN BEING GAY OR MENTALLY ILL OR ANY OTHER FACTORS. THIS IS ASSUMING ALL CHARACTERS ARE CISHET AND NEUROTYPICAL.

women are "soft and harmless and lovely" as you put it when they fight...if they're fucking tifa lockhart. if they're feminine and sweet and cute normally, or at least perceived that way. if they look like they're out of madoka magica (and oops not even then, bc you bet your ASS there's insane demonization of miss homura akemi). and also, friendly reminder, that "soft and harmless and lovely" thing isn't a compliment. it's fucking infantilizing at best.

for sheer simplicity's sake, to compare two ships that are on a relatively equal playing field in terms of representation, i'm going to take a look at the general reception of goro akechi/ren amamiya from persona 5 (i'm using ren as his name for simplicity's sake) and madoka kaname/homura akemi from madoka magica.

some brief context for both: both are heavily queercoded, homura is initially introduced as an antagonistic character but it is later revealed to not be the case, akechi is initially introduced as a friendly character but it is later revealed to not be the case, and both homura and akechi have clear and intense struggles with trauma and other mental health issues.

judging by what i've said, from your own logic, surely homura is a widely beloved and not at all vilified character. after all, she's feminine, she's not REALLY a villain, and she's got sympathetic motivations. right? wrong. homura is widely beloved... by sapphics. but even people who LIKE THE SHOW DO NOT ALWAYS LIKE HER. homura was WIDELY hated and discoursed back when the show first aired. you still get people who hate her. and even more frustrating, despite the blatant, you-absolutely-cannot-miss-it queercoding, sapphic fans of the show still have to argue that it's not just "girls being friends". it's not even a true enemies to lovers setup, and you still cannot escape homura being called toxic and predatory.

now let's take a brief look at akechi and ren. like previously stated, akechi is revealed to be an antagonist later in the story. and when he is, he tries to shoot ren in the head and frame it as a suicide. this is, quite obviously, a lot different from homura and madoka, where homura never even directly fights madoka. surely by your logic, akechi would be widely seen as a villain, unforgivable, horrendously terrible? well he most certainly isn't. he's one of if not the most beloved characters by fans. his relationship with ren is more often than not read as romantic, and it's practically treated as canon by a large majority.

and like i previously stated, i am not saying the mlm example i've given is without issues - akechi/ren is highly sexualized and fetishized. it's just a very DIFFERENT problem from the vilification that wlw characters often receive. and i am not saying that mlm are NEVER vilified. i am simply saying the large, overarching trend in fandom is to be forgiving of men, and unforgiving of women.

i simply do NOT see mlm ships get the same treatment in this regard to wlw ships. sora/riku from kingdom hearts and catra/adora from she-ra have...practically the same narrative in many ways. childhood friends separated by a worldwide conflict, becoming enemies, fighting each other multiple times, arguably with intent to kill, eventually saving each other and finding a way to reconcile in order to emerge victorious against the true villain. riku and catra are strikingly alike, as are sora and adora. but riku is once again a fan favorite character. and catra has received backlash after backlash after backlash. i hardly even post about she-ra anymore and i STILL get people in my inbox talking about catra discourse!!

again, i'm NOT saying the script is never reversed. there's not really anything to be won by making absolute statements like that. i'm just saying that i have never seen it, and even on the odd chance that i do it's never as severe.

once again - yes mlm characters face backlash. no one is saying they do not. but it is different backlash. i am specifically discussing the fan reception of wlw characters and ships bc that is my personal experience. different problems do not equal better problems.

i'm tired of bad faith interpretations of my posts. unless you want to have a respectful and thoughtful conversation (which i AM open to), don't come at me with boldfaced accusations.

#anon #long post #disclaimer: i conferred with my roommate who is mlm for the general reception of the characters and ships mentioned

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operaghostnocturne · 4 years

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The Problem with ‘Love Never Dies.’

“Love Never Dies,” 2012 Starring Ben Lewis as The Phantom, Anna O'Byrne as Christine, watched on Youtube, 4/24/2020 SPOILERS. I would like to note: I enjoyed the set design, costume design, some of the music, and production of this version of Love Never Dies. I also really liked the actor’s performances. They did a good job. I especially loved Ben Lewis’s singing voice. (Derrick Davis ((US Restaged Tour)) is still my favorite.) The problem with Love Never Dies is its a sequel to Phantom of the Opera, the characterization, and writing. ALW’s Phantom of the Opera stands alone. It was never meant to have a sequel. It really doesn’t need one. I do feel there is a big disconnect between POTO and LND. I think LND could be rewritten to have nothing to do with the original POTO and would not suffer for it. To me, LND feels like someone’s fixit fanfic that doesn’t actually fix anything. POTO is also insanely iconic. It is hard to follow it up. While LND’s music is pretty good, I don’t think its nearly as memorable nor iconic as POTO’s. I also don’t feel it balanced original POTO music with new material. Honestly, it needs to pick one. Something ALW does in his musicals is reuses the notes of a song, mixed in a different pattern to make a new one. “The Music of the Night” and “All I Ask of You” are like this (look at sheet music if you don’t believe me.) This is not a complaint. This helps with cohesion of a musical. It also makes refrains, duets with battling music, and sometimes even story, clearer. When its done well, its unnoticeable. In fact, I got to play a POTO compilation in a semi-professional concert orchestra in high school. I never noticed ALW does this until when someone pointed it out to me like a month ago. In LND, I can constantly hear the rifts from the first musical, to the point where I think one of those songs is about to start, or it gets super distracting. I noticed this especially in ‘Why Does She Love Me?’ I’m 80% sure it was based of POTO’s main theme (like the song ‘Phantom of the Opera,’ or the ‘Overture.’) Again, I liked most of the music in LND. But it doesn’t hold a candle to POTO. oh look I made a pun. Having said that all that: LND feels like a sequel mostly to 2004. In my opinion, 2004 has the most sympathetic version of the Phantom, and the one that could most likely end up with Christine in the end. Especially compared to the US Restaged Tour. In 04, I also feel like the Phantom and Christine (not their actors) feel closer in age than other productions of the musical, other Phantom adaptations, and even the book. (For those who don’t know: Erik is 50-60 in the book, Christine is like, 16.) LND’s writing is not great. First of all: THE PHANTOM’S NAME IS ERIK. I know they were trying to have a MYSTERY pun. Mister Y does not work for that, especially in a format that ISN’T BEING. READ. I can understand why its left out in POTO, as it lends the Phantom some mystery (though I do not like it.) There is LITERALLY no reason not to have the Phantom called Erik it LND. Granted, this is a complaint I have from POTO too. I kinda feel like the Phantom not having a name dehumanizes him. That is a discussion for another day. I absolutely HATE that the Phantom runs a circus company. A big part of Erik’s trauma comes from being in a freak show. I don’t believe Erik would be willing to go back to that. I also don’t think it would be his scene. The Phantom of the Opera belongs in an Opera house, or at the very least a music all. I don’t know why he couldn’t have started something like that instead of a freak show. Or perhaps be an eccentric composer. Especially if he is getting help from the Giry’s. I do think its fitting that he’s working with/employing disabled, or deformed people, and other societal outcasts. However, being the owner of the VERY THING that treated him horribly is pretty bad, especially since we don’t know if he treats these people any better than he was treated. Also, every time the music switched to ‘show tunes,’ I felt Erik’s soul dying. On that note, when LND shifts from a musical to addressing the audience directly in its ‘show tunes’ sections, its jarring. It breaks the fourth wall way too much and really pulls the audience out of whats going on. The way Erik is in POTO, chased away from the world and the light, is why he is like he is. He became fascinated with the night, the macabre and darkness because of his experiences with the world. That’s a pretty big point in POTO. Its one of the things that make him sympathetic. After all “THE WORLD SHOWED NO COMPASSION TO ME!” is the Phantom’s excuse in the final lair. LND tramples over that. Gustave seems to be interested in the same darkness his biological father is, as seen in “The Beauty Beneath.” Erik’s obsession with the dark, night, and macabre is turned into genetics. Which is pretty bad for Gustave if you think too hard about it. Erik is a serial killer. I do believe talent can be passed in genetics. I also think the way we view said talent and how we use it is shaped by personal experiences and preferences. On that note, Gustave could have gotten his musical abilities from his mother, or his grandfather, both of whom are also talented musicians. Another thing LND suffers from, is making Christine a prize again. Raoul and Erik do not see her as a person. ‘Devil Take the Hindmost’ is literally the boys having a dick measuring contest, with Christine as the prize. That is not okay. I hated the ending. For several reasons. First of all, the Phantom is still abusive. He is a puppet master. He is still not capable of having a healthy relationship with Christine. Secondly, Christine dies. ALW, if you are gonna write a fixit fic the LEAST you could do is let Erik be happy. Plus, Christine is killed by a cliche ‘I just wanted you to notice me’ subplot. One that wasn’t entirely well set up or thought out. Which is disappointing and frustrating. Last two things I hated: when Christine kisses Erik for the last time, she doesn’t take off his mask. I feel like they missed a good opportunity to show Christine being completely accepting of who Erik is, including what he looks like (again, would be better if Erik wasn’t abusive.) I also NEVER like it when we don’t get to see Erik’s deformity in any version of Phantom. The only other one that doesn’t I’ve seen/read is Dance. (Which I dislike greatly. Its at the bottom of my list.) I’m kinda good either way if Gustave goes with Erik or Raoul (preferably neither, if I get a choice, which I don’t.) Erik and Gustave can connect over music in a way Raoul and Gustave cannot. Erik can teach Gustave about music and the beauty beneath. Raoul did raise Gustave. Raoul might also have a serious heart change after the events of LND that we are not shown. Or we can do that one AU where Raoul and Erik become Gustave’s two dad’s (either gay or not, whatever floats your boat.)

The worst thing about LND is it completely ignores the character growth in its predecessor. Characters completely regress into who they were before the ending of POTO. This is annoying and bad writing. Lets start with Meg and Madame Giry. I don’t like that Madame Giry is helping Erik. Yes, she helped him escape the freak show in 2004 (and possibly other versions.) BUT, she was also absolutely TERRIFIED of the Phantom in POTO. She helped Raoul find the Phantom’s Lair, with the full knowledge that Raoul intended to put a stop to Erik’s madness. I think it would be more likely that Madame Giry would stay as far away as Erik as she possibly could. Madame Giry also feels like a secondary greedy villain in LND, and that feels WAY off base for her. Maybe Erik being manipulative has rubbed off on her? Again, I don’t think she would be in this position in the first place (nor would Erik be manipulative, because I see him as realizing he DUN HECKED UP at the end of POTO). Meg, I could see wanting to help the Phantom (she even does in some versions.) I see this as her being enthralled by the legend of the Phantom, and less that they actually know each other. As for her loss of innocence, I don’t think it was set up well, nor was it executed well. Also, Meg wanting the Phantom to see her is a cliche. Cliches can be okay, if they are handled well. I don’t think LND wrote it well. The only person I feel that has consistent characterization from POTO is Raoul (well, a specific version of it.) I have always been of the opinion that Raoul is a jerk. Having him spiral into gambling and drinking after a traumatic event is not surprising. Could be something that was always there, could be PTSD. Who knows, it wasn’t really talked about beyond Raoul feeling sorry for himself, and him being frustrated that he can’t connect to Christine on a musical level. Christine’s arc in POTO was about taking back her own power and becoming her own person. Of letting go of the past and moving forward. This is thrown out. She is once again caught between two men in a dick measuring contest, both of which are trying to manipulate her to one side or the other, completely powerless. This time, there really wasn’t a way for her to get it back. I feel like she felt obligated to sing for the Phantom, even without Gustave’s life being threatened, and the Phantom’s manipulation is what made Raoul leave (Granted, I think Raoul leaving makes sense in the context of LND.) Christine has no agency in LND. Finally, the ending of POTO is what redeems Erik. He is the one with the biggest character arc and character growth. He learns the most. I do believe he had a genuine heart change at the end of POTO. What happened wasn’t what he wanted, but it was what he needed to become a better person, and start moving past his trauma. Ignoring that is a big mistake. Yet, in LND, he is back to being an arrogant, abusive, manipulative, puppet master. Sometimes, I can see small pieces of character growth. He seems less bothered by his appearance, and maybe slightly more mature. Though, even these glimpses are often overshadowed or ignored in the next scene. LND is NOT continuation of the characters we met in POTO. Much of the writing that connects LND with POTO is meh. Honestly, in some ways it feels like less a sequel and more its very own adaption of Phantom. Which is half its problem.

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melanch0lyism · 4 years

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Here it is bois- Jagged Little Pill full plot synopsis

So, a lot of people in the JLP tag have been asking for a detailed synopsis of the show. I’m here to deliver! This goes out to @sunveiins and @lovebug1313 who I think were the first couple of people to start asking and wanted to be tagged to know when this was posted. Hope this helps for anyone who can’t get out to see the show!! (Also sorry this was delivered a bit later than promised I’m the worst sksdfn)

Warnings: Drug addiction, sexual assault, heavy topics like that and obviously spoilers if you want to go see the show for yourself

ACT 1:

-Mary Jane Healy is a mother obsessed with being seen as perfect, the best at everything, and with her family’s squeaky clean image. Literally all her energy is invested into making sure nobody knows that a single thing is wrong in her life.

-The show opens at Christmastime, and she is writing her annual family Christmas letter (the purpose of which is basically to brag about how great the Healys are doing and how she’s winning at life).

-She writes about how her husband Steve got yet another promotion at work. Her daughter Frankie is in high school, as artistic and expressive as ever. (“In fact, right now, she’s upstairs with her best friend Joann working on a little craft project. *Lights on Frankie and Jo upstairs literally making out* “We always emphasize the importance of female friendships.”) And her golden boy, her perfect oldest son Nick, has just been accepted early to Harvard. (Right Through You)

-A celebratory breakfast for Nick reveals that the family is actually falling apart. Steve works so much that his marriage to MJ is now distant, hostile, and non-intimate. MJ is pressuring Nick to be perfect and keep up the family’s image. She’s constantly arguing with Frankie, who is adopted and feels the fact that she is black is being erased by her family in this white trash Connecticut town. (All I Really Want)

-Nick’s friends at school congratulate him and encourage him to come to a party that night to celebrate. Frankie and Jo complain about their complicated relationships with their mothers (Jo’s mom does not accept that she’s gay). (Hand in my Pocket)

-MJ has a prescription for opiates as she had been in a car crash earlier that year. When they are unable to refill the prescription, she gets in touch with a dealer. (Smiling) WARNING THIS SONG WILL BREAK YOU EMOTIONALLY :)

-In class, a student named Phoenix (a good boy 12/10, the only man in the show apart from Steve who deserves rights) defends Frankie’s writing as the rest of the class ridicules it. The two start talking and developing feelings for one another, and they plan to meet up that night at the same party Nick had been invited to. (Ironic)

-Steve calls MJ to say he has to work late again. They get in an argument. Steve loves MJ and wants to work on things between them, but MJ is having none of it. (So Unsexy) Nick consoles an upset MJ who tells him that he’s “the only thing she’s done right.” She asks him to hang out with her, but he says tells her he was planning to go to the party. Nick sings about the pressure he feels from his mom to never screw anything up. (Perfect)

-Frankie and Nick roll up to the party. (Lancer’s Party [So Pure]) Frankie finds Phoenix and the two bond over their complicated home lives. Jo, who was dragged to a church function by her mother instead of being able to go to the party, joins the song. (That I Would Be Good)

-Bella, a friend of Nick’s, had gotten drunk at the party. The next morning the students are circulating pictures of her passed out with her shirt pulled up and talking shit about her. Frankie and Jo go to check on her and make sure she’s ok (despite the fact that they literally do not know her). Bella tells them that another friend of Nick’s named Andrew had raped her the night before while she had been drunk, but that no one will believe her. Frankie and Jo assure her that they believe her.

-Frankie goes home to confront Nick, who she knew had been with Bella and Andrew at the party. Nick brushes it off, citing Bella having been drunk and being known for her tendency to be dramatic. Their argument is overheard by MJ and Steve. Frankie tells Nick that as the only witness, he has to go to the police. MJ and Steve insist that he do nothing, as he had been drinking at the party as well and there could be consequences if that gets out. Also- insert subtext that MJ went through something similar to Bella in her college days. (Wake Up)

-MJ goes to church for the first time in years to pray for help with her addiction, her marriage, and her children. (Forgiven) (No one asked but this is my favorite song in the show, such a powerful moment. Idk if they do this still but at the ART they made it snow onstage, which really added to the sense of isolation the characters were feeling. One of the like 5 points in the show where I bawled my eyes out.)

ACT 2:

-Steve finally convinces MJ to go to marriage counselling with him, where she insists the problem is entirely his. (Not the Doctor) Big argument. Steve is frustrated that they haven’t had sex in almost a year while MJ says they shouldn’t need to since she knows from looking at his internet history that he watches weird porn every day. She feels unheard and unappreciated for all she does. He tells her she doesn’t have to do so much and starts singing a love song to her that gets hijacked by Phoenix and Frankie singing to each other. By the end of the song, the two end up in bed together. (Head Over Feet)

-Jo walks in on Phoenix and Frankie. While storming out of the house she runs into Steve and MJ and tells them what Frankie is doing upstairs. Phoenix gets the fuck out of there, so Frankie's alone to deal with her parents. She gets very upset that her parents aren’t ok with her choosing to have sex while they don’t care about what happened to Bella. She runs away from home, telling them some piece of paper doesn’t make her their daughter. That turns into yet another big fight between Steve and MJ.

-Frankie takes a train alone to NY. (Unprodigal Daughter) She tells Phoenix over the phone that she loves him, and is pissed that he isn’t ready to say it back.

-Students at the school discus how outrageous they think Bella’s accusation is. Bella comes to the Healys’ house to talk to Nick, but only MJ is there. MJ tells Bella that the same thing happened to her in college (likely the first time she had said it out loud). After Bella leaves, Nick, feeling the guilt of being the only person with the power make people believe Bella, tells MJ the full extent of what happened the night of the party. He had been in the room when Andrew assaulted Bella, but had been drunk and in shock and did nothing to stop him. (Predator) Nick tells MJ that he wants to go to the police and help Bella bring Andrew to justice. She tells him what’s done is done, and the only thing telling the truth would accomplish is ruining his own life. Nick accuses her of only caring because harm to his reputation is harm to hers.

-Jo comes to New York to pick up Frankie (who ran out of money and became desperate) and ends whatever undefined relationship/FWB situation they had going on. (You Oughta Know) (Holy shit. This one song alone deserves a tony. I cannot stress this enough- Lauren Patten is a GODDESS. I’ve never seen a standing ovation in the middle of a show before this.)

-MJ has overdosed on her painkillers and ends up in the hospital. (Uninvited) Steve arrives at the hospital and the fact that he didn’t know she was struggling rUINS HIM. (Mary Jane) They finally agree to actually put work into fixing their marriage.

Steve, through tears: “I never meant to make you feel like work was more important than you or the kids. I didn’t realize how much I’d missed, I’m sorry. I’ve made so many mistakes. I’m such a mess.” MJ: “I’m detoxing from opiates. I win.”

MJ admits to Nick that she was wrong, and tells him to go to the police- Bella’s story is more important than their family’s reputation. Nick had already told the police what had happened.

-Everybody attends a rally Frankie throws for Bella, believing her now that Nick had come forward. There’s an important moment between Nick and Bella where he apologizes and she's mad that he gets to be the hero, that her saying it had happened wasn’t enough. (No) (Side note: in the ART version I don’t think Nick had a line in this song, letting Bella speak, and he just held up a sign that said “silence is violence” which was so much better.)

-The time has come for MJ’s next Christmas letter. She decides it will be the last one she writes and is honest for the first time about what had happened in the past year.

She writes about how she is in awe of Frankie, who spent the past year fighting for justice for Bella. MJ publicly admits her own past of sexual assault. She mentions that Andrew is being taken to trial and will not defend himself- he wants Bella’s to be the only story told. MJ and Frankie reconcile. (Thank U)

Instead of discussing Steve’s work again, she talks about how they are both in therapy individually and as a couple. He took up guitar lessons, but only knows how to play one Alanis Morissette record.

She opens up about her overdose and her experience in treatment.

Frankie dares her to send out the letter, and she does. “Merry fucking Christmas!” (Wow MJ Healy telling all her friends she has flaws? We love character development)

-Everyone reflects on what they learned (very cliché but it works). Frankie and Jo rekindle their friendship. Jo has a new girlfriend. Frankie and Phoenix decided to be friends. (You Learn)

#jagged little pill

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remywrites5 · 4 years

Note

I was wondering if you could do a bartender/Starbucks or YouTube AU, I seem to have a weird carving for those lately, they make me feel happier

Sirius sat down in front of his camera and turned it on. He took a deep breath and began to speak. Talking in front of a camera wasn’t exactly difficult for Sirius since he had always had a bit of a dramatic flair. “Hi everyone!” he said, giving a small wave. “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good and I’m going to tell you a super embarrassing story. You’re going to like this one.”

Sirius ran his fingers through his shoulder length hair and smiled before continuing. “So people have been asking me about this because a few weeks ago I tweeted something stupid out like ‘just met my future husband at Starbucks’ not sponsored by the way, I’m just a slut for their coffee. And I would be a slut for this one guy that works there but I cannot for the life of me figure out how to ask him out.”

Sirius let a slow smile curl his mouth before biting his bottom lip. He could picture Remus so clearly in his head as he spoke about him. “This guy is just…ugh…he’s just fucking adorable. Cutest. Guy. Ever. I’m not going to say his name because some of you get a little too into my personal life. Not that I blame you, my lovelies, because my life is fabulous, but I don’t want him harassed or anything. He’s getting enough of that from me, trust me.”

Sirius sighed and did a quick zoom to do a close up on his face. “Stalking is bad kids. Do not try this at home.”

He zoomed back out. “Hold on, I need something to drink.”

Sirius cut and came back holding a Starbucks coffee cup. “This is from this morning where I made a complete arse of myself. It’s gotten to the point where this guy knows my order. I don’t even have to say anything to him, which is also frustrating as hell because I want as many excuses as possible to talk to him. So I’m there, barbeque sauce on my titties – do people even remember that vine – anyway and I ask the guy if he needs my name and he’s like oh no I know it. Which fair enough, Sirius is a pretty weird name and I’m pretty unforgettable. And I decide to be all smooth so I’m like oh do you need my number?”

Sirius took a long sip of his coffee while looking directly into the camera. “And then he goes, ‘oh no just your name is fine.”

Sirius face palmed and shook his head. “Now I don’t know if this guy is oblivious or maybe he’s just not gay. I usually think I have a pretty good instinct for that kind of thing. James said maybe he just wasn’t interested in me but like come on, bitch please. I’m fucking fabulous.”

Sirius did an exaggerated flip of his hair for emphasis. “Well I’m definitely going to see him again because I’m addicted to coffee and kind of addicted to seeing this guy too. I’ll keep everyone updated if anything happens but for now I am completely mortified. That’s the awkward as fuck story behind that tweet. Hope you enjoyed my suffering. Love you all. Until next time – mischief managed.”

***

Sirius switched on the camera and sat down with a huff, crossing his arms over his chest and pouting for his audience. “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good and I’ve got an update on Starbucks guy – still not sponsored, like come on Starbucks give me a brand deal already. I’ve decided we’re going to call Starbucks guy Moony. Don’t ask me why I have my reasons. So apparently Moony watches my videos. I don’t know if he did before I posted my last one about him but he definitely saw it. I mean I told him once I did Youtube and it can’t be that hard to find me with my name.” Sirius quickly did a search on his phone. “Yup, I’m the first thing that comes up. Fuck.”

Sirius dropped his head back and groaned at the ceiling dramatically for a moment before straightening back up to look into the camera. “So the next time I go into Starbucks I see Moony quickly ducking into the back room. And this redheaded devil woman is completely rude to me when I ask about him. Of course my best friend James is already in love with her because he apparently has no standards. But yeah, she’s telling me that it’s none of my business where Moony is as if I’m not the one fucking gone on him.”

Sirius scrubbed his hand over his face. “Moony, if you’re watching this and I hope you are, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I’d like the chance to apologize face to face but I don’t know if you’ll keep avoiding me.”

Sirius zoomed in on a close up of his face. “Come on, who can say no to this face?” Sirius did his best pleading puppy dog eyes at the camera. “Until next time my lovelies. Mischief managed.”

***

Remus was in the middle of restocking the lids when he saw a familiar head of long dark hair. “Oh shit buggering fuck,” he cursed under his breath, ducking behind the counter. “Lily!”

“What is it?” she asked, in the middle of making a latte.

“He’s back again!”

“How long are you going to avoid him?” she asked in exasperation. “The longer you hide the more I have to deal with him and his obnoxious friend.”

“I’m sorry,” Remus said sincerely from where he was crouched. “What the fuck am I supposed to say to him?”

“How about I saw your videos and while I’m not exactly comfortable with an extremely public relationship for the whole internet to see I’m also super gay for you and would like to suck your cock?” Lily shoved the sleeve onto the cup. “Mobile for Henry.”

Remus let out a small whine. He could see Sirius getting closer and he was paralyzed with indecision. He’d been attracted to Sirius since the first time he’d come in, of course he had, in fact he’d watched Sirius’ videos online and had a bit of a thing for him. He knew Sirius lived in London as well but had never imagined he would actually run into him and they had had a nice chat. But Sirius was intimidating in the way all unfairly gorgeous people were. When Sirius had offered up his number, Remus had been in such a panic that he couldn’t even think of accepting it.

He stood up when someone else approached the counter to order. He couldn’t just make Lily do everything while he hid like a frightened child. “Hi, what can I get for you?”

He could hear the door open and glanced over, already knowing it would be Sirius. He shuffled his feet awkwardly and ignored the urge to dive under the counter. He rang up his current customer and then took a deep breath, trying to mentally prepare himself.

“You’re here!” Sirius said excitedly, his grin so large it looked like it might hurt to smile that big.

“I work here,” Remus said, cringing internally. That wasn’t exactly new information, was it? It wasn’t like Remus to state the obvious.

“Look, before you say anything I want to apologize. I’ve gotten so used to living my life online that sometimes I don’t always think about it. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable with my bollocks. I swear I didn’t mean to.”

“I thought you were normally swearing to be up to no good?” Remus managed to gently tease, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

Sirius laughed. “So you do watch my videos!”

Remus blushed and ducked his head down. “Yeah, I have for years actually.”

Sirius took his phone and placed it on the counter. “Please for the love of all of creation give me your number. Or I can give you mine if you’d rather. I promise I won’t push for anything more than what you’re willing to give.”

Remus chewed his bottom lip as he stared at Sirius’ phone. “And what would you use my number for?” he challenged, pretending to be a bit bolder than he felt.

Sirius huffed, his breath rustling the long hair falling into his face in a pleasant sort of way. “Texting you, calling you, setting up dates, swearing my undying love and devotion. The usual reasons people want other people’s phone numbers?”

Remus picked up the phone and added in a new contact, programming his number in under Moony. Despite himself, he’d actually grown rather fond of the nickname, even if hearing Sirius say it in his videos made him go all hot and red.

“Thank you,” Sirius said, taking his phone back and clutching it to his chest as if it were something precious. “You’re wonderful.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “You hardly know me.”

Sirius winked at him. “The point still stands.”

“Undying love and devotion, huh?’”

“Only if you want it, Moony.”

Remus rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “And what would you get out of it?”

Sirius smirked and leaned over the counter. “Any chance you get an employee discount here?”

“Ah so now the truth comes out,” Remus said, chuckling softly. “Just using me for cheaper coffee.”

They were so close it would hardly take anything at all for Remus to close the distance between them and kiss Sirius. In that moment he wished he were someone a little bolder. Sirius was biting his bottom lip seductively as if he knew exactly what Remus was thinking about.

“Well I have been spending a fortune on Starbucks lately just for an excuse to come and see you,” Sirius said teasingly, looking up at Remus through half-lidded eyes. “The least you could do is lighten the financial burden.”

Remus reached out and tucked a stray piece of hair behind Sirius’ ear, his fingertips just barely brushing against Sirius’ soft cheek. The small gesture had taken every ounce of Remus’ courage. “You getting your usual, then?”

“Nah, I got what I came in here for,” Sirius said, standing up straight. “You don’t mind if I tweet out that I got your digits, do you? It’s just my subscribers have been following our epic love story. I want them to know it has a happy ending.”

Remus laughed softly. “As long as you don’t tweet out my actual number then it’s fine.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Sirius said, his fingers tapping away quickly as he composed his tweet. “I’m much too selfish. Want you all to myself.”

Remus couldn’t help the flutter of his stomach when he heard that. “Mischief managed, then?” he joked, trying to ignore the blush creeping up his neck.

Sirius tapped his finger against his lips as if considering it. “Oh Moony, Moony, Moony,” he said, biting his thumb as he smiled. “Our mischief is just getting started.”

***

Sirius turned on the camera and then dropped into the chair next to Remus. They looked at each other for a moment and then both started laughing. “Do you want to say it?” Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow at Remus.

“It’s your catchphrase, love.”

“I wanna hear you say it,” Sirius whined, putting his arm around Remus’ shoulders.

“Fine,” Remus said with a heavy sigh. “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”

“Damn right,” Sirius said, kissing Remus on the cheek. “For those of you painfully out of the loop, or don’t follow my Instagram where I post about a million pictures of you, this is Moony. Say hi, Moony!”

“Hi everyone!” Remus said, tucking himself further into Sirius in embarrassment. Sirius couldn’t help finding Remus being camera shy infinitely adorable.

“So we’re a little bit pissed because it was the only way I could get Remus on camera,” Sirius explained, lifting up his gin and tonic and taking a sip. “You all have been asking me to do a video with him since we started dating three months ago and I am finally giving in. On twitter I asked you to send me questions and of course we got a fuck ton of people asking who tops and who bottoms because ya’ll nasty.”

Remus snorted. “Do you want to answer that or should I?”

“Bitch, you know I’m the bottom, why ya’ll playing?”

“Not all the time though. We do switch it up on occasion.”

“True. Next question! Is Remus going to start a Youtube channel of his own?”

“Fuck no,” Remus said, shaking his head. “Do you see how uncomfortable I am right now?”

“Aw baby you’ll get used to it,” Sirius said, pulling Remus into a kiss.

“Still not starting a Youtube channel though,” Remus said, breaking the kiss after a moment or two. “What would my content even be?”

“You could do a channel on knitting or coffee or whatever the fuck you want.”

“I’m good.”

“Moony, give the people what they want!”

“Absolutely not.”

Sirius pouted and it made Remus laugh. “Fine, I’ll slowly wear his down everyone, don’t you worry. Next question! What was your first impression of me?”

Remus grinned. “I thought you were barmy but gorgeous. You kept making me blush the first time you came in because you were flirting shamelessly.”

“Guilty as charged! Gorgeous and shameless, you were pretty spot on.”

“You’re never anything less than resolutely yourself,” Remus said, gently running his fingers through Sirius’ hair. “It’s something I admire about you.”

“If you keep complimenting me like that we’re going to have to pause the video so I can ravish you.”

“Later love,” Remus said, pressing a kiss to the corner of Sirius’ mouth.

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Sirius said, chasing Remus’ lips when he went to pull away. “Next question! Are we going to get married? I mean yeah probably.”

“Really?”

“Some day,” Sirius clarified, rolling his eyes exaggeratedly. “I don’t mean tomorrow. You’re like the fucking love of my life though. Why wouldn’t I want to marry you?”

Remus was staring at Sirius and Sirius worried he might have said something wrong. He could always cut that part out of the video if it made Remus uncomfortable. He was just about to suggest that they move on to the next question, his mouth opening to speak, when Remus attacked. He kissed him hard, open mouthed and needy. Sirius moaned softly and let himself be dominated by his boyfriend’s insistent tongue.

“Yeah, we’re going to need a minute,” Remus said after breaking the kiss. He turned off the camera and dragged Sirius towards the bedroom.

***

“And we’re back. Sorry about that but we had to cut or this whole video would get demonetized.”

Sirius looked at himself in the reflection of the camera lens and knew he looked thoroughly fucked. A large purple bruise was already blooming on his neck and his hair was nowhere near as tame as it had been, curling around the ends from the sweat and heat. This time instead of sitting in different chairs, Sirius had made himself comfortable on Remus’ lap.

Remus cleared his throat. “Next question?”

“Is there an animal you think represents you?”

“I have no idea.”

“I think you’d be a wolf.”

“A wolf?”

“Yeah. Total pack animal. Wolves are intelligent and friendly. They take care of their own. Loyal. But like can also fucking kill you.”

“Huh.”

“You’re a total wolf. What would I be?”

“Probably a dog.”

“Hmm, I do like the way they fuck.”

“Also loyal, friendly, easily trained – “

“You know it,” Sirius said with a wink to the camera.

“Need for attention from your owner. You also love being petted.”

“Fuck, you’re right, I’m a bloody dog,” Sirius said, his eyes widening as he took that information in. He let out a bark and then licked a stripe up Remus’ neck.

“Oi! Behave yourself!”

“Never!”

Remus shoved Sirius playfully. “Next question?”

Sirius picked his phone back up and looked for a good one. “Am I going to Vidcon this year. Fuck no. America is a scary place. Has Remus ever knitted me anything. Yes the beanie I wear all the time. Do we live together? Yes, obviously, London is fucking expensive. Which one of us likes to cuddle more? Me.”

“Definitely you.”

“You’re just so soft I can’t help it,” Sirius said, kissing Remus’ temple.

“You won’t hear me complaining.”

“You’d better not,” Sirius shot back with a knowing grin. “You can’t shag someone the way you do and not cuddle them afterwards. There’s another reason I called you a wolf.”

Remus blushed bright red. “Okay, I think one more questions before I go die of embarrassment.”

“No dying, Moony, I’d be lost without you.”

“Just ask the stupid question.”

“What is one thing that drives you crazy about each other?”

“Good crazy or bad crazy?”

“Do both.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “Bad crazy I would say your tendency to be dramatic. He breaks a nail and it’s the end of the fucking world. You also steal my clothes a lot and never wash them. Good crazy I’d say the hair. And your smile. And your arse. And those leather trousers you have.”

Sirius tucked his hair behind his ear and grinned. “That was sweet. For you I’d say bad crazy is your tendency to leave your bloody books all over the flat where I trip on them. Good crazy I’d say your lips and your eyes. And the fact that you come home smelling like coffee. And your soft jumpers that are very fun to steal and wear and never wash.”

“Prick.”

“You love me.”

“God help me.”

“Love you too,” Sirius said, kissing Remus deeply. “So that’s it for this video. I hope you guys are happy that you got properly introduced to Moony. Will you say it with me?”

“Fine.”

“Mischief managed,” they said together, ending the video.

#wolfstar #I write things #long post #anon prompt #Youtube AU #coffeeshop AU #fluff #modern setting #marauders

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justphilia · 4 years

Text

Royalty AU I had but won’t write maybe probably I don’t know

Guess who got unsatisfied with a post and decided to rewrite the whole damn thing?

This bitch!

Anyways I’m gonna give this a go again, this time gonna write in arcs and not in characters.

Same situation as my DBH idea, except this one is even more loose since I don’t know a lot about royalty and I thought about this while sitting around.

Kageyama parents ambiguously dies and Reigen takes pity on the boys. They’re like teens turning adults I suppose? Seventeen to twenty??????? It’s tough, I will fix this.

Ritsu doesn’t like the idea but Shigeo hears there’s a really nifty garden in the palace and what could go wrong if they lived as princes anyways?

One thing about Reigen that is commonly known in the kingdom is that, no matter how many times he denies it, he has a soft spot for kids that ranges from younger than him.

Which is an issue because staff members are counted.

Cue Tome and Teru. Tome’s a maid servant who also got picked up by Reigen since she was some thief or something idk I’m working on that. At first she got offered the princess role too but she’d rather work with dirt than wear a dress bigger than herself.

Teru’s a knight who has always been in the palace, so he wasn’t offered the prince role. Fine by him though, he gets treated like one anyways, which is why he’s such a prick sometimes.

When Tome arrived, Teru assumed she was hired as staff and wasn’t aware she was suppose to be a princess. So when Ritsu and Shigeo arrives, he thought they’d be the same as her, so he gets a little cocky, assuming they were new servants or something.

Until Reigen declares them as his new sons.

Both requested to keep their family name until they get comfortable, which Reigen immediately understands. Ritsu low key gets a crush on Teru because he’s handsome, and nearly fucking dies when Teru is assigned to teach Ritsu the basics.

Tome gets assigned with Shigeo, and even though she turned down the offer, she was aware of the basics after reading a few books and watching how Reigen acts.

Ritsu, being the fast learner he is, grabs ahold of the idea pretty fast. Shigeo, on the other hand, keeps screwing it up. Mostly because during the times he was suppose to practice, he was vibing in the garden.

This ticks Teru off, because, “Isn’t he at least grateful he’s here? Can’t he take this prince thing seriously?”

Anyways news got out to the other kingdoms that there were new princes, so they’re all buzzing around pretty excited because, for one, despite how shady Reigen seemed, his kingdom is running wealthily and everyone wants a piece of that. But since he didn’t had kids before, they couldn’t arrange marriages to mooch off his shit.

Now that he did though...

But since the news was still pretty fresh, no one really knows who the kids are exactly.

The first person who got intrigued was Suzuki, specifically Shou. He gets a bit too impatient in waiting for more news and decides to travel over to see the new princes himself. He meant to visit Shigeo - since the only info he knew was their names and who was older - but accidentally found his way towards Ritsu’s room instead.

Ritsu isn’t the least bit amused when he saw Shou just sitting there, but he was definitely panicking.

Shou thought ahead and came in with a disguise, actually, so it won’t give a reason for Ritsu to act all nice and shit. But even after revealing who Shou really was, Ritsu was still just blatantly rude.

Shou liked that.

He promises to visit every week at night.

Ritshou ensues.

After Ritsu finally gets the gist of this royalty jazz, Teru gets a bit frustrated and requested that he teaches Shigeo. Tome shrugs and lets him do it, wishes the blonde good luck, and continues with her chores.

Terumob ensues, will not elaborate. Shigeo is lovable that way.

When Shigeo and Ritsu both finally got the hang of things, Reigen organized a ball to celebrate it. People are invited.

Tsubomi’s role in this is pretty shaky not gonna lie, but she does live as a Suzuki and I’ll probably fix this too. She gets a little crush on Tome and they talk.

Tsutome ensues, but it’s forbidden love (wahhhhhh).

Tome reveals she was suppose to be a princess too, but it would be awkward if she decided to change her status now. She still strongly doesn’t want to be a princess either.

There’s a huge plot hole here as I jump to the next arc without explaining how.

Tsubomi convinces Ritsu that since they are both extremely gay, they should get married without having to worry about accidental crushes. After getting married, Tsubomi can take Tome (as funny as it sounds, it’s technically what happens), then request a divorce and have Ritsu marry Shou instead so there’s not much backlash.

Problem is, they can’t tell anyone else, because rumors do happen and they don’t want to risk that.

Which causes a lot of issues that gives Reigen a large headache I suppose, ranging from Shou sending flowers to Ritsu, to Shou getting mad at Tsubomi, to Shou trying to get Shigeo instead but Teru goes, “HISSSS MINE.”

Things go well in the end. But I did have like a sequel where Shou would take Ritsu on an adventure to find Shou’s mom. Forgetting to tell people.

Cue Reigen screaming as he searches for his son.

Shigeo: Can I come, that’s my brother--

Reigen: No you stay here and rule the kingdom in my place with Teru and Tome.

AND HERE’S THE FUNNY PLOT TWIST GUYS:

Reigen finds Shou’s mom first, she’s in a tower locked away with Serizawa guarding the place and also to keep her company. Reigen low key gets injured, it’s vague, and Serizawa’s like: Damn, now to protect two royalties I guess.

Problem: Reigen isn’t even aware Shou’s mom is Queen Suzuki, so he rests in a cool tower with Serizawa and her until he feels better to search for his son again.

“Imma go now.” Reigen throws a peace sign but Serizawa has been given orders that if anyone was to trespass this area, they cannot leave alive.

But hey, he said they can’t leave alive, never said they can’t stay alive.

So Serizawa’s like, “Noooooo, you’re still hurt.”

“Damn, guess you’re right.”

Serizawa tries numerous ways to delay Reigen’s healing, but it can only do so much without actually killing the man.

But the moment he gets better, Ritsu and Shou finds them.

“DAD WHAT THE FUCK.”

“Oh hey son.” Suzuki and Reigen says at the exact same time. They look at each other. “What.”

“hellu mommy, i found u, is our hide and seek game over did i win?”

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #suzuki shou #kageyama ritsu #ritshou #terumob #hanazawa teruki #kageyama shigeo #reigen arataka #kurata tome #serizawa katsuya #takane tsubomi #serirei #tsutome #fanfic ideas

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altik-0 · 4 years

Text

Personal Revelation

I've spent the last two weeks trying to figure out how to write this post, but my mind has felt like it's tumbling around a washing machine and trying to figure out how to straighten my thoughts into a coherent message has felt impossible. But I'm driving myself crazy continuing to hold off on saying something, so I'm going to just rip off the bandage now, and we can talk in more depth after the cut.

Hi! 👋 I'm Asexual and Aromantic! Let's talk about it.

Where to even start

This month has been a fucking trip.

On the one hand, this has been the fourth month of nearly continuous quarantine for the COVID-19 pandemic. On the other, the end of May was the spark that began a wildfire of protests against police brutality that have swept across the country, including the seemingly milquetoast land of Salt Lake City. I found myself simultaneously figuring out the umpteenth way to keep myself entertained while being in home nearly uninterrupted for over 90 days, while also desperately searching for the courage to exit my home and join the marches against injustice.

And in the background of all of this, it was Pride Month.

On the 12th, a Youtube creator I follow released a video about their experience discovering themselves as non-binary. You should watch it, but what is important for the sake of this post is that the bulk of the video is an asynchronous telling of various moments throughout their life that, in reflection, show them that "[they] were who [they] are now, back then". These moments form a tapestry that tell a story of self discovery, and the result is incredibly powerful.

They released a rough cut about a week earlier for Patreon supporters, and I was immediately transfixed. I watched it three times in a row on the first day it was uploaded. I watched it twice more after the release. Hell, when I pulled this video up now to get the share link I couldn't help but sit and watch through it all over again.

At first I didn't really know why I felt so attached to this piece in particular. Yet still, I spent multiple nights laying awake for hours in what felt like a dreamlike haze at the time. It took three nights like this for me to realize I had spent all this time reflecting on my own past moments, and revisiting them through the lens this video had shared with me.

How I got here

It is September 2005. I am currently at a school dance. I know I am supposed to be finding someone to dance with and enjoy that for some reason, but all I want to do is go home. I might consider mustering up some courage and just asking someone, anyone, to dance, if it weren't for the fact that I still didn't have any friends. Instead, I feel trapped, wandering up and down the side wall, waiting for it to be over so I can finally leave. I stumble across a small group also sitting on the sides; a girl reading manga, and another playing Yu-Gi-Oh! with a boy across from her. I approach: "I didn't realize anyone still played this" They invite me to join, and soon I find myself with genuine friends at school for the first time in years. I never think about asking someone to dance again.

It is the summer of 2017. I am at a bar with some coworkers at the end of the week. I don't drink, but I've opened myself up to joining people for happy hour because it feels like a good way to socialize, and I've genuinely enjoyed getting to know folks. My team lead makes a comment that he feels it's impossible for a man and a woman to ever have a friendly relationship without having some element of sexual tension between them. I rebuff this comment -- initially I feel a sense of feminist frustration at the concept, as if it is implicitly saying that men and women should not work together. As the conversation continues, I realize the real reason I feel so sure this is wrong is because I have never felt this way toward anyone I've worked with.

It is the summer of 2008. I am in church, listening to the new instructor for my Sunday school class shift the discussion towards politics. Since he began, every lesson without fail will eventually derail into right-wing screeds. For him, any issue that is even vaguely left-leaning is a potential avenue for Satan to take hold of you: feminism, activism, even environmentalism. But lately he has had a particular fixation on the topic of gay marriage, and it is beginning to take a toll on my mental health. Being in these classes, hearing a man in a position of authority repeatedly say "it is not that we shouldn't love these people, but we need to still understand that they are committing a sin" has become physically painful to listen to. Of course, I am not queer, just an ally -- I can only imagine how painful this must be for those who are directly affected. I will nearly pass out from exhaustion and anxiety during sacrament meeting a few hours later.

It is February 2020. I am out to lunch with a friend and coworker. I have just recently changed jobs after less than a year, because I was hopelessly miserable at my last one. It should have been a dream job, marrying two of my closest passions, but instead I felt suffocated by being in a world where everyone seemed indifferent towards me at best, or actively hated me at worst. My friend invited me to join this job, and although it is a miserable job, I find solace in being able to go to lunch and have genuine conversations with someone I get along with. He mentions his wife is pregnant, and the stress of tending for his current child while she is resting. I acknowledge the frustration, though somewhat awkwardly since I am still single. "Oh, yeah, I sometimes forget you aren't married yet, haha. Well, don't worry, you'll get to join in on the fun soon enough!" I want to say "I very much doubt that"; instead I say "Well, I guess we'll see." The conversation does not feel so genuine anymore.

It is January 2009. I am watching House M.D. with my dad. We bond a lot while watching tv. We're both avid fans of MST3K, and we are invariably the obnoxious people in a movie theater a few rows down cracking jokes throughout the film. It feels fun and rebellious, even if we're doing it at home where nobody will be annoyed. This episode starts with Foreman and Thirteen waking up together in bed after clearly spending the night together. My dad cracks a joke about how "they're going to get in trouble, since they aren't married!" I quip back "nah, it's not a big deal, they just slept together, haha." My dad pauses the show and turns to me, deadly serious: "Who told you that was okay?!" I am a deer in headlights. I suddenly realize that I meant "slept together" literally, but nobody else uses it that way. I don't understand how I missed that.

It is October 2010. I am at home, speaking with my mother after coming home from school. She has always been a political firebrand, and especially after I left the church and started college the two of us have connected on this a lot. She has just read an article that mentioned the expanded acronym "LGBTQIA", and says she doesn’t know what all the "I" and "A" refer to. I don't yet know what the "I" refers to, but I suggest the "A" is probably for "asexual". She says she hadn't heard of asexuality, though that does make sense. I realize I don't recall hearing about asexuality before either. I don't actually know if anyone identifies like that. It just somehow feels like something that must exist.

It is the spring of 2007. I am at a local game store playing at a Friday Night Magic event for the first time. I suffer from very extreme social anxiety, and I spent the entire week a ball of nervous energy. Despite myself, I have managed to drive myself to the event and register. I have promised myself dozens of times over that I already knew Magic players were people similar to me, so there was no reason to worry. My first match is against someone wearing a frilly dress, cat ears, and tail. She mews at me several times while playing. On the surface I have frozen and only robotically go through motions of playing the game because my anxiety has boiled over to the point that I cannot quite function properly. Inside, I am filled with pure delight at realizing that someone could feel comfortable expressing themselves that openly in a space like this. I eventually become friends with this person who I will later learn is trans -- I had never met a trans person before. I will become close friends with three more trans people, at least two enbies, and countless other queer people over the next decade of playing this wonderful game.

It is November 2019. I am at work, sitting at my desk, feeling completely numb despite starting the day energetic to the point of mania. I've just had an argument with a close friend -- perhaps the closest friend I've ever had -- and it ended... poorly, to put it mildly. So poorly, in fact, that it is safe to say we are just not friends anymore. The reality was that there were always problems between us, and this was a culmination of conflict that never really got effectively resolved. It might not have even been possible to resolve. In the moment, though, I cannot escape the suffocating feeling that I am a failure as a human being; someone who simply does not know how to maintain a relationship. My mind goes through loops of how I could have said something differently to have it end better. The emotional pain will not fully make sense to me until several months later, when I realize this was the closest thing to a break-up that I've ever experienced.

It is January 2012. I am watching House M.D. with my dad again. Since leaving the church, watching shows like this has been a desperate lifeline for our relationship. We don't joke as much anymore. This episode features a side plot with an asexual couple, who House determines is simply impossible, and uses his power of supreme logic to prove the asexuality wasn't real all along. I have heard of asexuality, though I don't know where or when, so I am angry at this. Of course, as an ally. I want to joke with my dad to release some frustration, but he is still in the church, and I don’t think he will empathize. I stay silent, and do not enjoy this episode.

It is December 2019. I am scrolling through a Discord channel I was invited to from one of the leftist creators I follow. This community has been a breath of fresh air in many ways, and one I found surprisingly helpful was an NSFW adult content chat channel where people are open about sex, fetishes, and more. I've considered myself fairly open-minded and sex-positive, but I'm still a virgin at 28 so I've found there is a lot I just don't know about. Today, someone has started a conversation about what qualifies as "taboo" and relating it to kink-shaming. Another member replies, mentioning they are asexual and find the whole notion of taboos being kind of bizarre. My mind reels at seeing someone who identifies as asexual in this chat. Over time I find out there are several other people who identify at least gray-ace in this chat, some who even draw risque artwork for commission. I realize how little I actually understood about what asexuality really was, and begin scouring the internet for articles and wikis on asexuality.

It is April 2010. I am at an Apollo Burger across the street from the local game store where I am playing in a Magic prerelease. My friends I followed over are talking about weekend plans, and one of them makes a joke about doing some chores to butter up his partner to have sex. The joke does not go over my head -- I am straight, and understand sex, even if I am still a virgin -- but I still can't help but think out loud: "You know, I just don't get why people make such a big deal out of sex." The awkwardness and confused looks are suffocating. I drop the topic immediately.

It is June 2020. I have just watched a video from an enby Youtube creator about their experience discovering their own gender identity. Over the next three days I will see every one of these past experiences, along with hundreds of others, flash before my eyes in rapid succession, over and over, until I begin to realize that I haven't allowed myself to truly identify how I do. Every time I asked "am I asexual?" in the past, I would dismiss it because I understood sex and have a sex drive. Once I actually researched asexuality, though, I almost immediately found stories of people who identify as ace and still experience a sex drive. I also discover a lot of stories from aromantic people that sound painfully similar to feelings I hadn't even realized were not the norm. For the first time I begin to realize I may not just be an ally.

So what does this mean

I came to a sense of satisfaction with living alone and single a long time ago. At first this came with a certain level of shame, because I felt like it was only because I was too cowardly to enter the dating scene and try to find a relationship for myself. Over time the impact of the shame diminished, but it never went away; it just became a quiet background noise that I got accustomed to pushing back.

But now that I feel comfortable calling myself "Aromantic", I don't feel any shame. A romantic relationship is simply something I don't need. Instead, I can focus on fostering the kinds of deep relationships that do feed my soul. That will likely be a difficult thing to do -- awkwardly traversing intimacy was something most people worked through as a teenager or young adult, and I'm nearly 30, haha. But it at least feels possible now.

But really the biggest change for me is that I feel like I can be honest and public about who I am in a way I never was before. Simply being open about this piece of my identity somehow feels important if for no other reason than to let other people who felt like I did growing up that they aren't alone.

So... yeah. I'm aroace. And I always have been.

#coming out #aroace #aromantic #asexual #pride #god it's nice to have an emotional post that doesn't need to be tagged as garbage for once

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faunusrights · 4 years

Text

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 18

IN THIS EPISODE OF ROBLOX OOF NOISE:

“Yes.” Glynda couldn’t hang up, not without: “I’m—I’m sorry. About what I—”

“It’s alright. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Okay—” The feed cut. Softly, Glynda said again, “Okay.”

GLYNDA DISCOVERS WHY BEING CINDER FALL SUCKS

do u know how hard it is to wake up and play animal crossing whilst knowing this chapter looms over yr shoulder,

OKAY HERE WE GO

She was fidgety; even Cinder mentioned her pacing, shooting a critical eye her way. Glynda sat, intent on stillness; moments later, Cinder mentioned her bouncing leg.

i LOVE it when a chapter calls me out just right out of the gate hahaha who gave u the right

"Really?" How long had they been doing that? How long ago had Cinder noticed? "Should I stay?"

cinder: maybe i should tell glynda abt that /see glynda pacing a dent into the floor cinder: ooooooor i could. NOT give her an excuse to bully them for something to do,

On her way down the street, Glynda couldn't help but stare at the car, its tinted windows revealing nothing within. As she passed it, she kept glancing over her shoulder, expecting an attack or something. But nothing came of it.

HJGDFSGSDFHKGHJDF GLYNDA,,,,,,,,,,, can u imagine being in the white fang, and sittin in yr fuckin. TINTED WINDOWED like BULLETPROOF CAR and yr sat on yr ass watching out for cinder “dumbass” fall and suddenly glynda goodwitch, The Top Bitch, comes out and starts GLARING YR CAR DOWN,,, like ah. i think she knows we’re here. hrm. hm.

i would just like. drive to mcdonalds and get some nuggies at that point.

She had a clutch of flash-images and a wash of emotions and impressions, the raw materials of memory, stored as-is without refining. She was quite used to that—most of her missions were hazy and rough in her memory, mere sketches of events.

i cant wait for glynda to become a vlogger if only so she can actually have physical proof of whatever the fuck happens whenever she goes out and about. get her a go-pro.

It told her: despite her restlessness, despite the arduous journey here, and despite the way Vale seemed to call for her from somewhere beyond the horizon, she felt quite content to be where she was.

the difference having a gf has huh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, u got a whole ass home (being cased by the fang) a real nice city to live in (its floating and atlas wants yr number) a bunch of unread msgs (from a [redacted] who [redacted]) and its a nice day!!! its all coming together. but probably not for very long,

(i got very distracted at this point making a line graph for the animal crossing stalk market so here we go, x2 edition,)

That meant the nightlife would soon begin. She had never liked crowds; too many people, too much input at once. It was hard to focus, to be comfortable.

/chefs kiss

autistic glynda did u kno: id die for u,

Since she’d blocked Ozpin’s number, there was no chance of receiving anything directly from him—but there was still a moment of pause each time she checked her Scroll, as if expecting his smiling face to appear somehow.

OH YEAH LMAO SHE DID THAT SHIT HUH,,,,,,,,,, i still cannot BELIEVE that happened. GOD. cant wait for this to bite her entire ass right off her body,

By the time she reached the top landing, Winter had replied: “I wasn’t aware that you had additional support on this mission, Professor. I will need their full name and Hunter’s license number.”

To answer Cinder Fall and she doesn’t have a license, but she does have several warrants for her arrest felt like inviting Winter to question not only her integrity, but her sanity as well.

SDHGJFKSKGHDJFGJHDKF i cant say what makes this funnier because 👈😎👈 but HOHOHOHOOOOO could u imagine the fallout if she did just, say that shit. if we just went and fuckin said it like it was no biggie--

Finally, Glynda let her shoulders relax, exhaling deeply, like she would before rushing a Grimm. She wrote it plainly: “The clearance is for Cinder Fall.”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

MA’AM WHAT THE F U C K

winter rn:

She’d just have to wriggle her way out of having to talk face-to-face, then return the game to a field she felt slightly more comfortable with: text.

okay this is so funny to me cause i just keep thinking of her sending ‘no reason’ to oz. a MASTER of textual conversion. un fucking PARALLELED in this field, UNRIVALLED,

Glynda tossed a look at the door as well, her mouth pulling into a line; what if Cinder came outside? What if—

Could Winter track her exact position using her Scroll signal? She minimized the projection of Winter’s face and hurried off in a random direction the instant she hit the bottom of the stairs.

i LOVE these two because this is the first time we’ve rly seen glynda like. Actively do smthng to defend cinder in this sort of way? she’s been pretty passivve abt letting cinder take the lead when theyre together but on her own shes thinking of all the contingencies to make sure winter cant find cinder and u know what. thats gay. what will u do for yr not-gf when yr talking to someone who would kick her ass in a hot second,

also im TAKING to grab choice lines here to comment upon but honestly this next section is SO GOOD that im rly struggling to find a line to encapsulate how much i am LOVING this convo. i cant say exactly WHY im loving it because again thats 👈😎👈 BUT KNOW THAT THIS IS VERY GOOD FOOD AND I AM ENJOYING IT. and im also enjoying this line a lot

Winter’s voice was decisive: “Professor, if you hang up on me, I am flying to your location—tonight.”

winter: if y’all dont shut the fuck up back there i am turning this car, city, and continent AROUND,

It was the same thing, over and over: people didn’t understand her and she didn’t understand them. It was an exercise in futility that only gave her grief. In the end, she gave up on trying to explain herself. She resigned to being wrong, to always being wrong, even when she knew she wasn’t.

OOF OKAY WHAT THE HELL IS UP W/ THIS FIC AND CALLOUTS. HUH??? ME BITCH!!! I FEEL THAT!! AND IT SUCKS,

/reads the next bit

oh are we donning our tinfoil hats? we’re donning our tinfoil hats.

It was so easy. Glynda didn’t stumble over her words even once; didn’t waver. She was built for doing harm. Her anger burned hot and clean; it excised all the hurt like a malignant tumor.

Maybe she really had learned something from Cinder—channeling her frustration, her guilt, her pain, all of it into anger like this was something Glynda was new to. But it felt good. She leaned into it, letting it take the reins; the distressing memories vanished like wisps of smoke, vaporized by the heat of her wrath.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS god this is. SO EXCITING. i also love it when ppl rub off one one another its my FAV thing in the WORLD and this anger is. WOO. this anger is. DANDY. its also a very short-term burst of pleasure glynda so enjoy that hollowed-out whoopsie feeling that i sure get when i Blow Up,

“She butchered my friend!” Winter snarled, the camera shaking as she slapped the desk. “She butchered my friend in the streets like he was cattle! And I have done everything in my power to help you! Everything! To keep her from doing the same to you, and you’ve blown me off or lied or—” Winter’s voice snagged. “And now you tell me—you accuse me—”

It was early evening in Umbraroot, but it must already be night in Atlas. The shadows revealed the unclean angles of Winter’s face: the bruises of exhaustion under her eyes, the lines of stress at the corners of her mouth.

im sorry im just copy-pasting wholesale at this point but OH this is GOOD. i cant rly explain. like. the difference-- because you’d think from the og version this is just a bit more flavouring right? its like getting a bit of hot sauce on yr chicken wings and yr like ‘okay it adds smthng but its not like a side meal’ BUT IT IS A SIDE MEAL this is like a whole basket of fuckin. cheese-baked fries. winter DESERVES this screentime she DESERVES to have presence in this fic and OH does she USE IT im LIVINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Glynda wanted anger. She wanted fire and brimstone. She wanted a fight.

What she got was the glisten of tears on pale lashes. A hand covering Winter’s trembling mouth.

The ashy taste of remorse in her throat.

THERES THAT HOLLOWED-OUT WHOOPSIE FEELING!!!!!!!!!!!!! THERE IT IS RIGHT ON TIME. its like CLOCKWORK,

She didn’t have anything. Nothing against that. The possibility that Winter might truly care what happened to her had been so insignificantly small and easy to trample. She had forgotten about the losses Winter shouldered the moment Cinder had whispered inheritance.

it’s just like clockwork,

also this chapter feels lengthy but maybe its just cause i got distracted with animal crossing so ill have to do a wordcount check at the end

/checks

no its lengthy this is a thicc one,

“I know,” Glynda said. “I know. I know how this sounds. But she’s the only person who makes me feel like—like I make sense.” In her mind, Glynda lay in the darkness of Cinder’s bedroom, watching the glaze of streetlights along her lips as she said you.

you,,,,,,,,, we,,,,,,,,,,,, our,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, its all that gay shit,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

“If I’ve learned anything, it’s that Cinder Fall is a tremendous liar. She could convince you it is raining in Vacuo, given enough time. Two years ago, I was working on the Argus base, where I met her as a client; she told me she was a merchant seeking entrance into Atlas—she had all her documents in order, her entire persona set up, and she sold it perfectly. She was flawless—and all of it was fake. She gave me no reason to doubt her. She was—”

Winter cut herself off, abruptly. Then: “Once I was comfortable and safe, she burned down my office and murdered my friend.”

YES,,, SLOWLY THE LORE PIECES TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! winter is once bitten twice shy, but mayhaps we mean,,, once burnt,,,, twice shy,,,,,,,,,, hrmmmm,

Glynda told Winter everything.

OH MAN,,,, we’re really getting this messy fucking trio up in this bitch i am SO excited. i am THRILLED. here! we! go!!!!!!!!!! also i said it before but again im so glad winter gets to Be Here for this. sure this has nothing to do w/ her destiny or w/e but shes here now. shes in the uber. she waiting outside.

The dying potted plant Glynda had spotted last time on the back wall’s shelf had been replaced with a new one; this one’s leaves were beginning to shrivel at the ends.

dsfjhhkljsdf side note: is this like that scene in finding nemo where all the new fish see the niece and go ‘oh no we’re gonna die’ but instead its plants getting taken into winters office? they go ‘im sorry, mate, but once you go into her office, you come out TOTALLY dead,’

okay so this whole convo happened and if i try to pick one section ill end up picking it all AAAAAAAAAAAAAA im dying out here. WINTER BLEASE,,, BELIEVE THAT SOMETIMES CINDER CAN TELL A HALF-LIE. A SORTA-TRUTH. A SEMI-HEMI-DEMI HONESTY,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

How different would that mission have gone? How different would her life have been?

She found herself saying, “He had so many chances to tell me. Instead, he let me think I was reckless. That I was a danger to other people. I stopped working in teams. I didn’t have many people in my life to begin with, but afterwards was worse. He saw to it that he was all I had, and he let me think it was my fault.”

ROBLOXOOFNOISEDISTORTEDWITHDELAY.MP4

OOF!!!!!!! O O F!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! honestly OOF that shit HURTS BITCH!!!!!!! thats BANANAS. WILD. im also loving (hating???) the increase of painful glynda lore and honestly everyone feels like they have So Much More that builds them up and im THRIVING off it. im also suffering for it.

With the video feed closed, Glynda could see she had new notifications. Missed calls. From Cinder.

Glynda’s stomach lurched. She stowed her Scroll before she could think about them.

At the mouth of the alley, she could see the shape of Cinder’s apartment in the distance. She stood there for a long time, staring, uncertain what to do with her hands, unsure what to do with her heart. Her jaw flexed. She remembered the tears on Winter’s lashes. The friend she’d lost.

Glynda took her first step toward the apartment.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA and so the soft domestic shit ends. but nowhere near as explosively as id thought???????? HUH. H U H. must b because we’re gearing up for smthng honk honk honk

ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. this chap was SO good its astonishing (despite the [several] times i got distracted by animal crossing rip me). WINTER!!!!!!!! BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant believe this disaster trio is coming together. also cant wait for glynda to tell cinder the shit she just pulled. oh no,

(also the wordcount was 5,931. just in case u were curious)

#liveblog #rwby #offal hunt #HERE IT IS #so much went unsaid because the convos were SO juicy so PLEASE read it #dfsghsdfjgh

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planetsam · 5 years

Note

a story where alex was the one in the pod at the end not rosa?

Michael pulls up as soon as he’s ready to go.

Cursing their laughably bad timing, Alex forces himself to stand there. He said that he was ready to talk and they are going to talk. What he isn’t expecting is for Michael to get out of his truck and storm towards him, anger rolling off him in waves. Alex has never been afraid of Michael, even with everything he knows, but for the first time he feels something like fear. He doesn’t back away even as Michael throws the chair in his way to the side.

“What the hell are you?” He demands.

“Excuse—“

“Answer the question. Or I swear to god, I will—“

“You’ll what?” Alex demands, meeting the challenge.

“I found Alex! I know your secret so what the hell are you?”

Alex raises his eyebrows. His secret? Michael knows all of his secrets, even the ones he didn’t particularly want him to know. He has no idea what Michael thinks he found out, but from the look on his face it’s big. There’s no softness in his gaze or any of that underlying emotion he can usually tease out. It’s just rage and pain. And protectiveness. To his surprise another car pulls up and Isobel and Max come flying out. Michael turns fast and a wave of something rocks towards them. They both pull up sharply, Max holds his hands up like Michael is something wild. Wild and dangerous.

“Michael—“

“Shut up!” Michael snarls and turns back to him, “what the hell are you?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” He says.

“You need to come with us,” isobel speaks up, “please.”

He doesn’t feel like he’s got much of a choice, he never wants Michael to look at him the way he’s looking at him. He can’t stomach Michael seeing his father when he looks at him too. He drives to the middle of nowhere and follows them along the desert to some nameless faceless cave. There’s a big object there covered by a blanket. Max and Isobel hang back but Michael, still trembling with rage grabs the blanket and yanks it off the pod.

He isn’t expecting to see himself in there.

It’s pre-teenage him, from the spiked hair to the black lining his eyes to the chipped polish on his nails. He’s naked and the scars from his father are so much fresher than they are right now. His legs, both of them, are tucked in front of him and his arms are around them, but even he can see that whatever is in the pod is very, very dead. He can’t say it’s Alex Manes, he’s Alex Manes. This is something else.

“That’s not me,” He says.

“Don’t lie to me!” Michael roars.

“It’s not me!” He shouts, “that thing isn’t me. I’m right here,” he looks at the body, “that—“ he stops, “I don’t know what that is. But it’s not me.”

They don’t believe him.

“Look at him, that’s a kid! It’s not me,” he says, “he’s what? Twelve?” He shakes his head, “I’m not him.”

“So who the hell are you?”

Alex looks at the body laying in the pod, clearly dead. It’s a kid. Right around the time his father’s abuse turned more violent and more physical, right around when his dad left. He doesn’t want the puzzle pieces to do anything, let alone start to assemble into something. His phone vibrates and he takes it out, answering the call before anyone can stop him.

“Now isn’t—-“

“Your father attacked me and I put him in a coma,” Kyle blurts out, “I’m in jail I need you to call a lawyer for me and I figured you’d want to know.”

Alex hasn’t been relieved to see his father since he was younger than whatever is floating in the pod. But if anyone can tell him about what is going on, it’s a man who has spent his entire life fighting aliens. He turns from the pod and looks at the three of them.

“My father’s back,” he says, “he’s in the hospital.”

“Let’s go,” Isobel says.

Max can bring him out of whatever is going on. Michael lingers and unfolds the blanet, carefully covering the pod. If Alex had any doubts that Michael loved him, they are answered in the care he takes. Their eyes meet in and the venom is back. There’s no more don’t that Michael loves Alex Manes.

He’s just not sure that’s him.

He doesn’t remember the drive back, but Jesse Manes is awake when they get there. Alex knows there are several ways to play this but he goes for the one that gets them on the same page the quickest. He locks the door in their faces, he doesn’t care. This is something he needs to know.

“I found Alex’s body,” he says.

For the first time he can remember, Jess’s shoulders relax.

Alex feels sick. Sicker than he did a moment ago. The entire time he thought his father hated him because he was a monster, because he was gay. Not because he was a monster who murdered his kid. After years he could say that he didn’t deserve to be hated for what he was. The loss of that certainty rocks him even before Jesse looks up at him.

“You preserved it,” he says, “I want to bury him—“

”He’s twelve,” Alex cuts in, “I saw the belt marks. It’s right before mom left. I’ll take you to the body, I want to know what happened and why you would bring a monster home. Why don’t I remember?” Jesse is quiet, “do you want your sons body or not?!” He demands.

Jesse reacts to that and Alex feels sick. He always longed for the day when his father was afraid and he was in charge. But not like this. Never like this.

“Alex was smart and inquisitive,” he says, “never took no for an answer. I thought he was ready,” he looks down, “I was such a fool,” he looks at Alex with venom that suddenly makes a lot more sense, “You killed him. You took his face. His body. Everything.”

“You brought him to Caulfield?!” Alex stares at him in horror, the image of a kid running around that place making him sick.

“He needed to know,” Jesse says.

Alex fights the urge to vomit.

“You needed to bring an Alex home,” he says.

“It wasn’t all a loss,” he says, “the military—“

“You brought me home and tortured me for six years!” Alex says, suddenly not caring about anything else. Jesse doesn’t even flinch, “and you were beating your son.”

“He needed discipline,” Jesse says, “you were an experiment,” Alex feels sick, “everyone could sense you were wrong. You are a poison.”

Alex can accept he is a monster, he thinks. What he won’t accept is the blame for Jesse’s sick experiments. They might both be monsters but the kid in that bubble did not put those belt marks on himself. There’s no hollow promise of blood when he looks at Jesse, just a sick man in a hospital bed.

“Where is my son?” Jesse demands, “you said—“

“I lied,” Alex cuts in, “your son is right here.”

He leaves before Jesse can respond, he’s not going to give up anything else and Alex is afraid of what he’ll do. He comes out to see Isobel and Max looking anxious but Michael is actually pacing. Alex doesn’t know what to think or what to feel. He just knows that everything has fundamentally changed. A horrible thought occurs to him as he looks at the three of them and remembers Michael screaming about family and his own words.

“Are you all related?” He asks.

“No,” Michael says but whether it’s a denial of that or something else, Alex isn’t sure. Michael starts forward and for the first time, Alex flinches away, “Okay,” He says slowly.

“Let’s go outside,” Isobel says, “we need to not be here.”

They get outside in a blur. Alex is already compartmentalizing things. Everything is infuriatingly normal. Nothing has shifted except his own awareness. He needs to go home. He needs to rip apart every record until he figures out who he is and how he could do this. He cannot explain anything if he doesn’t understand it himself. When he gets to his car he reaches for the door handle only to be blocked by Michael.

“You can’t drive.”

“Of course i can.”

Michael gets that stupid look on his face that tells Alex he isn’t moving. Alex knows he’s right but he doesn’t want to give him that. He wants to know the truth.

“We could be related,” he says, “do you understand that?”

“We didn’t know,” Michael says.

“This isn’t Star Wars!”

Michael snatches his keys and only the knowledge that he has killed a child makes him not lunge for him. Michael being the sane calm one is not something he wants to happen regularly. He’s not sure he can take it. But he finds himself in the back of his car before he has any idea how he got there. Michael’s barely stopped it before he’s barreling into the bunker, desperate to know everything he can. If he’s not Alex Manes, if he’s never been Alex Manes, then who the hell is he.

“Alex,” Michael says.

“Don’t call me that,” Alex snaps back.

“What the hell am I supposed to call you?” Michael demands.

“Nothing. Just let me work,” he orders, focusing in on the task at hand.

Michael exhales in frustration but Alex ignores him. He can’t say anything. He has to figure this out. He has to focus on the tax at hand. Honestly it’s almost embarrassingly easy to find now that he knows what to look for. He takes it back to the time when Alex would have been the age he was in the pod. Does it make it better or worse that all the shit Alex has been through is him? He can’t figure that out at the moment. He can only focus on finding—

It’s him.

He gasps audibly and Michael shoots up, ignoring any boundary of personal space to peer at the information. There’s no point in asking if he’s sure. Alex knows. The words used to describe him are so ugly there is something personal about it. He forces himself to read about any information he gave up. About anything credible. The thing that surprises him the most is how tied his file is with someone else. Or a rumor of someone else.

“Holy shit it’s Noah,” Michael says. He looks at him, “did you—“

“No!” Alex says. He scans down and immediately wishes that he had, “oh my God.”

“Oh my God what?” Michael nearly pushes him out of the way and leans forward, “oh my God,” he looks at him, “you—“

“I think I might be sick—“

“With Max?!”

Max Evans his the epitome of a straight white boy and somehow, according to this, they were together before they were violently murdered. Together as in married. His pride at Antar’s progressive nature doesn’t quite help him with the sick feeling of finding out he’s an alien, a murderer and somehow married to Max and under the protection of Noah. It’s such a strange thing to think of, he doesn’t know how to reconcile it with who he thought he was. He still doesn’t feel like this person. He doesn’t feel like anything close to who the file says he is.

“You mind warp,” Michael says.

“Gives a whole new meaning to self sabotage,” he says dully, glancing over at him. MIchael looks at him quietly, “I think I warped my own memories.”

Michael blows out a breath but doesn’t tell him that it’s impossible or any of the things that Alex half hopes that he will say. He’s quiet and thoughtful, the way that Michael rarely is. He’s always been brilliant in a way that stuns Alex, there’s an ease to it that seems to bypass all the work everyone else puts in. He knows this is a big deal because Michael is quiet, quiet and thoughtful.

“We knew each other,” he says.

“What?”

“We knew each other. Back there,” Michael says, reaching out. Alex jerks back, “Alex—“

“That isn’t my name,” Alex says.

Determination takes Michael’s features and Alex finds himself being all but dragged up the ladder. He’s not surprised to see the twins there, though he’s not sure he can ever look at Max the same way. It’s an issue for another time. MIchael drags him over to Isobel.

“We need to know his name,” he says. Isobel raises an eyebrow, “he’s not Alex,” he looks at him, “she can influence you, maybe she can find it if—“

“Yes.”

He’s a murdering alien what the hell does he care about privacy at the moment. He’d ask her to pull all of it but he’s not sure he can come back from that. Isobel locks eyes with him and it’s a strange sensation. Like something is being pushed up from the bottom of some long forgotten place. Or well. Or compartment. He was always so good at compartmentalizing.

“What’s your name?” Isobel asks.

“Avim.”

#michael guerin #alex manes #malex #malex fic #roswell new mexico #roswell nm fanfic #michael x alex #malex fanfic #isobel evans #max evans #jesse manes #god who smells another big au starting because i dooo

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bottseveryflavorbeans · 5 years

Text

Masterpost of my fics on AO3

So I wanted to have a place to show off all my fics and I have finally gotten around to puttting them all on a list here so I can share it.

I hope some of you read my stuff and enjoy it. I had a lot of fun writing these, especially the memoir-esque on (Harry Potter and the Sexual Awakening) and my current WIP, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy in Strange Magic becasue it’s sort of detective-noir/urban fantasy.

If you read any and like them, stop by and say hi!

1. Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy in Strange Magic (37K WIP update weekly, M/E)

Summary: It’s been five years since the Battle of Hogwarts and Harry Potter is an auror, who catches wind of a series of magical surges that he thinks are linked to something insidious, but with a mildly tarnished reputation, he has a hard time convincing people of the problem especially so soon after the war. Harry joins forces with unexpected allies to help him find the source of the magical surges and save the wizarding world again, even if it means going against the very Ministry for which he works.

Main Tags: auror!Harry, potionsmaster!Draco, case fic, slow burn/slow build, lots of angst and sadness (be warned), some triggers like mention of past rape/abuse, mystery, suicidal thoughts, detrustive behavior, EWE, bi!Harry, gay!Draco

2. A Series of Unfortunate Ghosts (26K, E)

Summary: It’s sixth year and Draco Malfoy’s life is about to change thanks to some meddlesome ghosts who show him the path he is on is not the only path for him. Between their ghoulish advice and some deep soul searching, Draco regains some of the hope he lost.

Main Tags: sixth year au, Christmas carol themed, established relationship, angst, mention of past abuse

3. The Beginning of Something to Savor (5K, M)

Summary: Draco is out to blow off steam when he spots Harry Potter, crying, at the bar. He goes over, like a good partner should, to check on Harry completely out of a sense of what is right and not at all having to do with Draco’s little crush.

Main Tags: auror partners, sexual tension, post Hogwarts

4. Say it Again (9K, M)

Summary: After Yule Ball (in 8th year), Draco finds himself at an after party on the Durmstrang ship locked in the headmasters bathroom. He is trying to calm himself down, manages it, but then Harry Potter throws a wrench in things.

Main Tags: 8th year, second triwizard tournament, Yule ball, first kiss, drinking games

5. An Invite to Dance (3K, T)

Summary: This is a Western AU where Draco (Drake Mal) has stolen a gun, his gun, back from Harry ( Golden Harold Potts).

Drake has been on the run, trying to stay ahead of Golden Harold Potts, but each time he thinks he’s outrun the sheriff, he finds himself face to face with his foe. Golden Harold caught up to him and interrupted his drink, so they duel.

Main Tags: western au, auror partners, POV Draco

6. Pride and Prejudice and Mr. Harry J. Potter (6K, T)

Summary: Draco Malfoy is on the outside of society life after his family was tried for aligning themselves with Voldemort. The only thing that saved him was the intervention of one Mr. Harry J. Potter, the wizarding worlds most well-regarded man. Draco, who has been smitten with Mr. Potter feels rejected and when meeting him at a ball, decides to manintain his dignity and refuse to engage with Mr. Potter. *This is a Pride and Prejudiuce inspired piece*

Main Tags: pride and prejudice au, dancing, banter, angst with a happy ending, fluff, one shot

7. Snow Falling on Us (5K, T)

Summary: This is a (belated) Christmas fic...I hope you all are still in the mood for it. It is Christmas Eve, Draco has roped Harry into helping him break into Snapes potions stores for an ingredient. Harry agrees because he owes Draco for all his help in potions. So invisibility cloak in hand, they head off to Snapes stores, but things go wrong and they end up in detention on Christmas Eve.

Main Tags: Christmas Eve, fluff, snowball fight

8. Seeker’s Games (7K, T)

Summary: Harry and Draco met on the pitch to play a seekers game. It turns into a regular thing and while it started as a way to get out frustrations and play quidditch since 8th years weren’t allowed on the house teams, it grew into something more.

Main Tags: 8th year, one shot, flirting, quidditch, seekers, midnight meetings, friends to lovers

9. Threats and Promises (11K WIP, E)

Summary: This is the Voldemort wins AU that no one asked for, and yet...Voldemort wins the war and takes Harry, Hermione, and Ron prisoner because he has decided they are more valuable alive, at least for now. They are kept at Malfoy Manor since Lucius has proven to be a resourceful and reliable minion. The task of torturing the trio for information on the whereabouts of any remaining rebels falls to Draco. This duty is one Draco willingly accepts. His other duties are much less pleasant. At least in the cellar, Draco has control and power over his captors—it is especially alluring when it comes to Harry.

**This is a WIP that is currently on pause while I finish other things

Main Tags: au Voldemort wins, prisoner Harry, torture, hate sex, violence, abuse

10. A Night on the Town (1K, M)

Summary: This is a fun, short one-shot where Draco and Harry are on their way to a party being thrown in Harry's honor. And Harry doesn't know if it's the fancy limo Draco got them, or the excitement of officially becoming Draco's boyfriend, but he can't keep his hands off of him.

Main Tags: smut, limo sex, dirty talk, established relationship

11. When Desire Comes Calling (3K, M)

Summary: This is a one-shot based off of a prompt. "I'll be right back with your drinks," Harry mumbled, avoiding Draco's gaze and thanking the gods that he pretended not to know him. He wasn’t ready to acknowledge Draco just yet anyway. Almost getting caught & biting.

Main Tags: post Hogwarts, past relationship, Harry is a bartender, exhibitionism, public sex

12. Always Some Madness in Love (9K, T)

Summary: This is a collection of conversations that Harry has with people. I wanted to try and write a story from Harry's perspective, but only focused on one person at a time and have the story unfold that way. So each chapter is a just Harry and that person talking about his situation with Draco, in one form or the other. Harry is in love and doesn't know what to do, but when Ginny figures it out, he realizes he is in deep and needs adivce on how to deal with the fact that he loves Draco Malfoy, whom he get's reaquanted with two years after The Battle of Hogwarts because they both play recreational Quidditch.

Main Tags: slow burn, angst, fluff, post Hogwarts, auror Harry, unspeakable Draco

13. An Unrelenting Hunger (Under 1K, T)

Summary: Just a small, slightly erotic drabble about our favorite neighborhood wizards, Harry "I am so suave" Potter and Draco "I am so oblvious" Malfoy.

Main Tags: seduction, flirting, one shot

14. The Bet (1.5K, T)

Summary: It's eighth year and house unity is at it's peak. After an evening of drinking firewhiskey, Harry and Draco get into a disagreement about which of them is more seductive. Draco claims that Harry wouldn't know what to do, even if he tried. However, Harry knows there is at least one person who cannot resist him; Draco Malfoy. The bet is on. Who will emerge the victor?

Main Tags: 8th year, bets, dirty talk, seduction, drinking

15. Girls Just Wanna (6K, M)

Summary: This takes place two months after Harry and Draco get together (See: Harry Potter and the Sexual Awakening). They are throwing an engagement party for Neville and Blaise, but Draco is still in "I want Harry all to myself" mode, so when Ginny interrupts Draco littering kisses all over his new boyfriend, he convinces Ginny to go flirt with Pansy. After all, Ginny did say Pansy had a nice arse.

Main Tags: bathroom sex, spin off from series, female slash

16. Harry Potter and the Sexual Awakening (33.7K, M)

Summary: Harry Potter gets outed by Rita Skeeter in a recent Daily Prophet article and decides to take matters into his own hands. He decides to write a tell-all that everyone wants, the story of how he came to terms with his sexuality. What no one, especially Draco Malfoy, expects is this book doubles as a love letter to someone Harry calls, L.B. In the midst of being assigned to read and review Potter's new book, Draco realizes that some of the stories Potter tells in his book seem a little too familair. Thus, bringing up old feelings about the man.

Main Tags: slow burn, angst, lots of sex, past relationships, new relationships, memoir esque, POV switches, Draco pines a lot, Draco is shy

17. Hot for Teacher (15K WIP, M)

Summary: The students at Hogwarts are playing a dangerous game with Love Potions. Harry Potter is the Auror assigned to deal with the recent thefts from Hogwarts' Potions Professor and find the person behind the Love Potions. What Harry is not ready to deal with is his resurfacing feelings for none other than Potions Professor, Draco Malfoy.

**This is a WIP that is currently on pause while I finish other things

Main Tags: post Hogwarts, hogwarts professors neville and Draco, smut, auror Harry

18. Professor Malfoy Likes it Dirty (2.2K, M)

Summary: Draco Malfoy, Hogwarts newest Potions Professor, has a crush (a sex-dream-induced-crush) on Hogwarts very own Herbology Professor, Neville Longbottom.

Main Tags: a flirtation that leads to something hot, hogwarts professors

19. Song of my Soul (26.5K, T)

Summary: Harry is having nightmares again and just when he thinks there is nothing to help him, he hears a song. The song is coming from the Room of Requirement and it is beautiful. Without realizing it, the song helps Harry fall asleep. Harry finds he is desperate to know who is playing the song and Hermione thinks up a clever way to help.

Main Tags: slow burn, 8th year, romance, talent show, anonymous love

20. A Taxi, an Old Enemy, and Valentine’s Day (2.8K, T)

Summary: Harry, recently dumped, is being set up by Ron and Hermione and on Valentine's day no less. Harry of course is sort of sad and needs time to think before arriving at the Valentine's dinner, so he takes a cab which he ends up sharing with Draco Malfoy.

Main Tags: fluff, Valentine’s Day, one shot

21. Seven Minutes with Draco Malfoy (25.6K, M)

Summary: Harry was scared. Scared that he didn’t quite hate Malfoy anymore and wondered when that had happened and how he had not noticed it. Scared that he like being in this situation a little too much.

Main Tags: drinking games, 8th year, seven mins in heaven, slow burn

#drarry squad #drarry #harry potter #draco malfoy #drarry feels #drarry fanfic #drarry slowburn fic #drarry case fic #drarry au #drarry endgame #drarry fanfiction #drarry one shot #drarry drabble #drarry fic rec #my writing #my writing on ao3 #drarry ao3 #drarry fandom

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letstalksymphogear · 5 years

Text

Symphogear, EP. 2

Last time, on Symphogear!

An adorable little girl, stood up by her date for a reasonable explanation, jams it out with her favorite pop duo, caught unawares that they are also a monster-fighting syndicate experimenting with the power of sound (the power to make you dizzy) to activate an ancient historical relic. Shit goes south as the jams prove to be too powerful, guaranteeing tragedy amidst an otherwise baller concert. Hibiki is rescued by The Bigger Of The Lesbians before she self-destructs to make sure the entire threat is neutralized, leaving The Smaller Lesbian sad, yet still incredibly gay. Years pass as our protagonist goes to Music School, for Music, to bunk it up with her girlfriend as she tries to figure out what the hell happened. Her prayers are answered when she tries to rescue a little girl and is promptly cornered, activating the same outfit The Bigger Lesbian that saved her had on. Gungnir Dattos all around, The Smaller Lesbian loses her shit as everything goes downhill from there.

Now, where were we?

...right. The piss beacon.

And the person taking the piss.

Hibiki has nary a clue what to do. Symphogears don’t actually come with manuals, you see. They’re sort of a “close your eyes and wing it” kind of experience. In Tsubasa’s case, it’s quite literal.

“FUCK that was COOL AS SHIT, tight as FUCKING HELL”

Take pity on this face. This is the face of someone who’s last memories will be a confused lady wondering why she is suddenly part machine.

“imma save you widdle kid”

Something to note about this show is that all the fighters sing while fighting. Hibiki is no exception, even after being confused about what the hell she’s doing. It helps that her voice actress is a professional singer.

It helps that every voice actress here is some sort of professional singer.

This picture basically summarizes why Hibiki is cool despite being so goddamned dumb. She’s angry, and she’s gonna protect some kids even if she dies doing it. Kanade would be proud, if she wasn’t too busy being dead.

No shit!

Have you ever watched the original Sam Reimi’s Spiderman? Like, the very first one? You know all those awkward scenes about Spiderman learning how his powers work? Hibiki basically does that under crunch time. There’s a long segment about how she’s forced to figure things out while protecting a kid and Not Dying.

It’s going pretty great.

I can’t believe she’s secretly Steve Urkel.

“cannot FUCKING believe that girl my girlfriend saved managed to GET HER HANDS on her FUCKING CLOTHES that I WANTED to ENSHRINE IN A MEMORIAL to her how the FUCK did she do that cant BELIEVE i have to SAVE HER IDIOT ASS because she just CANT EVEN DO THAT-”

Tsubasa, preparing herself as a contender for the World’s Angriest Lesbian, barrels through the Noise in her motorcycle...

...which she smashes directly into the Noise. It does nothing.

Tsubasa has many a motorcycle to smash. It’s a testament to her dedication following her aesthetic.

She fueled the tank completely before smashing it in.

Tsubasa... is petty.

As Tsubasa t-poses to assert dominance (a woman ahead of her time, this first aired in 2012), she comes down ready to kick some ass and vent some frustrations. And frankly? She’s all out of ass.

“oh my god she’s even hotter up close i cant believe it”

“fucking knock-off outfit looks like it came out of a bootleg flea market”

You don’t need to know what happens next, because you already know what happens when someone shows up with a fucking sword ready to sing about their dead girlfriend and the conflicting feelings about seeing her armor pop up again on someone else.

Murder.

Lots... and lots... of murder.

“we’re so fucking useless why do we even exist”

After Tsubasa finishes what could only be described as a massacre, we’re treated to how people clean up the aftermath.

“hey, you know, make fun of me all you want, but at the end of the day, im the one holding the vacuum cleaner, and you’re literally turned to dust, so”

Even this little girl knows shit’s about the go down. Got the tea and everything.

This is one of the minor characters of the series. She works for the 2nd Division. Who is the 2nd Division? You’ll find out soon.

“i didnt die! fuck yeah. today’s a good day.”

“OH WAIT NO-”

Hibiki learns that her outfit unsets after a while, like bideo game. Who catches her mid-fall?

Her new best friend, of course. Don’t be fooled by this look. Tsubasa tragically suffers from resting angry face syndrome. It is, unfortunately, incurable.

“i hate how cute she is”

Hibiki reminds her that this is technically the second time Tsubasa has saved her, which in the large scheme of things, seems incredibly innocuous for someone who escaped a major tragedy many years ago. Unfortunately, time doesn’t move forward for Season 1 Tsubasa. Not for quite a while...

The funny part is it doesn’t even hit her initially. She never actually saw Hibiki personally during that moment, so she actually doesn’t even have a clue what she means.

Look at her. Look at this clown. How could you hate her. Look at that smile.

All the survivors are always forced to write NDAs about what they saw. This grows to comical levels at times, given the scale of what happens eventually. It might as well be the world’s biggest open secret by now.

“aight homies looks like i gotta go home, the wife’s gonna be lonely an-”

Oh.

“sorry holmes but you’re going to gay baby jail like the rest of us singers”

Hibiki’s face is riddled with guilt. The guilt of someone who just saved a little girl. How dare you, Hibiki. This is what you get for doing The Right Thing.

And so she’s taken to “jail.”

“sorry pal but you literally turned into a huge weapon and you have no idea how to use it so!”

And so, Hibiki was never seen again...

Alright, so she really isn’t going to jail. She is genuinely being taken into custody, though. To be honest, this kind of handcuff procedure is sort-of ridiculous for someone who literally just saved children, and you could probably bribe her to join them with a 10 piece chicken dinner, but hey, fuck it. 2nd Division has protocols, and that is to arrest people.

“i cant believe i was a fan of a narc all this time”

The school has a giant elevator that goes deep into the Earth. Also, look at that symbolism. Hibiki’s the only one looking at her own reflection. Deep.

Thanks, Tsubasa.

The interior decorator for this elevator is wild.

Tsubasa forbodes where they’re all going as some ominous, strange, and evil place where joy and happiness die. Where good feelings and innocence are destroyed, and hope is crushed and ripped at the seams.

As it turns out, Tsubasa is just an angsty piece of shit.

So here’s the situation:

The 2nd Branch, which are the people in charge of poking relics until they glow with the power of music to study and harness the power of as weapons to kill the Noise, live in a several mile deep high tech basement of an all girl’s boarding school dedicated to music. This is because, for the record, that the girls recruited to this school have the habit of being a little bit attuned to these relics. Hibiki, a newly christened Gear user, is now being recruited into this organized by Genjuro.

“i never got this kind of party when i was recruited”

“thats because nobody liked you, hans”

“im skipping my soaps for this”

“fucking hate my twin brother hans”

“she?????? gets a party??? SHE. gets a party. I DON’T GET A PARTY. SHE... GETS A PARTY? and i dont get a fucking party. i was literally BORN into this job. NOBODY gives me a damn party. this MORON who CLOWNS AROUND with her SUBPAR SONGS. gets a party. oh my god. oh my GOD. FUCK. FUCK!”

“if this is what its like to get arrested i gotta be gayer and do more crimes”

“I’m not actually surprised. I’m just pretending to be. I’m just really not good at pretending to be surprised.”

“fucking hate this family, im gonna eat all of hibikis cake and cry in my room”

Remember: This show first released in 2012. Ryoko? Trendsetter.

Ryoko’s screen is very dirty and foggy. Don’t ask why. Don’t even remember why I pointed this out. Just forget this point completely.

Hibiki understands that handcuffs just aren’t fashionable.

Genjuro casually explains that they’re the fictional japanese equivalent of the NSA, all while doing magic tricks. Truly a man of many talents.

Tsubasa is already plotting how to vent about all this in her diary, which she addresses as letters of Kanade every time she writes in it.

Genjuro and Ryoko introduces themselves as everyone else apologizes to her, except Tsubasa.

Ogawa also intro- yes, I’m recycling a picture- introduces himself. He’s pretty cool, too, and serves as Tsubasa’s ninja bodyguard, butler, and all around mentor. We never get a backstory on him, and likely never will. It’s best to keep it that way; it only adds to the mystery of who the hell this guy is.

“weird flex but okay”

Hibiki realizes she’s being recruited, after being told she’s being recruited. Given some brain cells remain in her head, she asks the obvious and wonders what the hell happened to her.

“ryoko, care to explain?”

“well, it’s simple. you’re the protagonist now.”

Ryoko, who has no sense of boundaries, subjects Hibiki to a medical inspection. As creepy as her tone is, its to inspect the state of Hibiki’s newly formed gear.

She’s finally freed from that long winded event and returns home to her wife.

“buddy you smell like shit. and french fries.”

“hibiki. you’re not dead, hibiki. come on, get up. i just cleaned this floor, hibiki. hibiki, please. this is genuinely unbecoming of you. hibiki, oh my god.”

“miku please i learned how to kick ass and im tired and please let me enjoy this nice floor”

Tsubasa does the thing real life Symphogear and all related products never actually bother to do.

“god she’s so gay for her but i know she’d never cheat on me so”

Hibiki ruminates on the day she’s had. This is where the really dumb angst comes in. You see, Hibiki can’t tell anyone about what happened, and Miku, now a civilian in her eyes, cannot know about her alter ego Symphogear antics. Hibiki feels bad about this.

“y u no trust me. y u no tell me troof. im wife.”

After a brief heart to heart Hibiki smiles and snuggles her girlfriend.

They’re gay.

“im gonna marry her knowing full well she’ll sleep through the ceremony. god.”

#symphogear #symphogear season 1

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