#this is me procrastinating two presentations and an essay and 3 other essays i have to revise | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dreamtydraw · 2 months

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hiya!!

I'm just here to check in and ask how you're doing! hopefully, the stress isn't too much!

personally, I'm fine, I'm gonna meet up with my childhood friend tomorrow (*^-^)

Oh! and also to answer your question, I don't know if these count as red flags (they are more things I don't like in vns) but I don't like it when the story outside of the romance aspect (if it's a romance vn) lacks depth and lore (or just makes no sense), and when there are no trigger warnings for heavy themes in a game!

(I'm really curious about which game you you're talking about >.< )

ANYWAY! I hope you have a great evening!

lots of love! <3

~🌿

happy to hear you'll have a good time plant !

I'll admit it's currently 02:02 in the morning and I have Premier Pro open with the video essay I was supposed to edit for today's project presentation which I completely forgot about making- SO STRESS IS HERE!

Kids, I'm giving you some advice: procrastinating IS NOT WORTH IT-

And about the vn ! I rather not give a name because the game is currently having a Kickstarter and I don't want to badmouth it when the dev is making an effort to finance but here is my rambling :

This game was recomanded to me by multiple moots who said they were obssess about it but the writting is mid. There is no scenaristic hook in the demo, nothing that particularly stands out for a storyline, and characters who are ( at least from their introduction ) very stereotypical in their role ( the rich ashole, the shy one, the energic one, the cute one, etc- ).

That in itself doesn't make a game bad, I mean hey Harem Otome is popular for a reason. My ick is with some choices made for two of the characters specialy.

The only dark-skinned character has multiple very visible scars ( in what is marketed as a slice-of-life game ) which is a trope that has been pointed out as racist since most of the time only POC characters will have scars even when their white counterpart should have too ( I won't go on detail here exactly on why this specific trope is linked to racism, I'll maybe explain another time if asked )

Important to say: I don't believe the design of the character was chosen with malicious intention but this was a red flag for me.

Another of my ick is that one of the li has a trans pins. Why would it ick me you may ask ? The character is the most feminine coded guy of the li group. Again, on itself alone this wouldn't be a problem but it gives me the vibe that if the character is in fact trans, his identity ( if explored ) will be linked to stereotypes.

Other dislikes I had ( which are purely personal taste here ) are: making the MC blush/having romantic reactions without given choice to the player to choose said reactions. + Having a li that is the stereotypical "aha I am heavily hitting on you cause I'm a player" character.

I'm talking about this game not because I think it's special, to me it's a very basic game that I simply won't play ever again cause I disliked it. I'm talking about it because I'm disapointed that the game my moot has been hyping up as being a banger is actually mid on the limit of possibly bad rep-

Thank you for taking the time to read and I wish you a good day.

#plant anon #anon ask #ask answer #dreamty's ramble

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amrv-5 · 5 months

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10, 20, and 30 for the ao3 asks?? :-) (hi i am also procrastinating)

AHH HELLO ZANE!!! and thank you for your contribution to Chillin Sunday (No Work Zone), where the goal is to chill and not work (essays is temporary, MASH brain is forever)!!!

10. What work was the quickest to write?

Okay this was weirdly hard to answer because it turns out the things I thought I started and finished in under a week (Crosswalks, Crossroads and Feeling's Plain to Me) actually were apparently started months before their posting, but most of that was just tooling around with a few images that came to me until I buckled down and finished 'em both in a 4-10 day little May streak of productivity. I think the actual answer going by date-start to date-post is Black Box War, which makes sense 'cause the dialogue moved at a good clip!!

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

I think probably Somewhere to Get To, both because it's long as hell (lots to forget and be surprised by, easier to read little chunks and then leave again) and also because there are certain little guilty pleasure moments I find very comforting LOL. I wouldn't call it an optimistic story necessarily* but I'd say it's grudgingly hopeful and tries to be humanist despite its occasional cynicism, which sometimes is nice to read.

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

Sappy but the COMMUNITY!!!!!! Writing fic thru 2022 felt mostly like a solo endeavor (little bit shy, not great at engaging online) but partway thru posting S2G2 when I got adopted into the MASHole discord server -- it was such a wonderful, welcome surprise to meet so many passionate people who liked to think about the show how I was thinking abt it, who have great ideas, who are doing amazing writing of their own!!! So much love to everyone I've had the pleasure to get to know thru fandom. Best best surprise.

*I have a lot of thoughts about what sort of philosophical worldview (or views, plural..? Two POV characters, after all...plus the mostly invisible but still present Hand of the Author) S2G2 and SCO adopt with the short answer being even I'm not sure what they're doing, really, or what conclusions they reach. The (arguable) unifying theme of "There were some things a person could fix, and others one had to live with the best they could" isn't all that optimistic, nor is Hawkeye's deeply pragmatic approach to life at the end of S2G2. BJ's the closest we get to optimism, and even he makes some pretty broadly negative statements. But....... IDK!!!! lots 2 consider. lots I assume I will still be trying to puzzle out in S2G2 3: Still Not Started.

#HELLO AND THANKS AGAIN!!!#ask game

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osamusbigtits · 2 years

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suna: i don't want to write this paper

osamu: then don't

suna: I don't want to fail, though

osamu: sucks to be you, then

atsumu, loudly knocking: you guys aren't fucking, are you?

suna: i hate your brother

#college au #this is me procrastinating two presentations and an essay and 3 other essays i have to revise #i hate college #this is literally only my first semester #hq #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#miya atsumu #miya osamu #suna rintarō #suna rintarou #sunaosa #osasuna #miya twins

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pens-swords-stuff · 2 years

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Hi Undine! It's ひな祭り anon 😊 Thank you for answering my ask!! I hope your exams are going well - so exciting that graduation and your licensing exam are coming up! Stressful for sure, though!

My Japanese name is Aiko, and I don't mind going by that! It's got less of a ring than Kewpie Anon, sadly 😞😆 I too, was absolutely SENT by your recent posts explaining the Mayoverse ahahaha

Hope you're having a good day! Any weekend plans?

In response to this post and this post.

Oh my god the MAYOVERSE! I love it!! Are you seeing this Kewpie anon?? brb going back to change the #kewpie anon tag to #mayoverse. (hahaha jk... unless...???)

It's very nice to meet you Aiko! How do you write it, is it 愛子? No matter how it's written, it's a very pretty name. Since you mentioned that it's your Japanese name, I'm assuming that you also have a name in your other language? (Presumably English but I don't want to assume). I'd love to hear how your names are structured. Do you have two separate names? I don't have kids, but I'm hoping to have some someday, and one thing I've been grappling with for my entire life is the possibilities of names for bilingual children. Full Japanese or English name? Give them a legal Japanese name and a legal English name? Japanese name with an English middle name, or vice versa? A name applicable in both languages? There are so many options and it's overwhelming. It's something I've been thinking of for a long time, so I'm curious about how it's worked for you.

My graduate program actually has no exams, which is absolutely amazing. (Besides, you know. The licensing exam 😬 but that's not part of the program soooo). I've always said that I would much prefer to have a bunch of essays and presentations instead of finals exams, so I'm super happy about it. On the downside: I have so many essays and presentations to put together. I've had a super chill semester with not that much work, and all of a sudden I have multiple presentations and papers to do, but none of the discipline.

It's really no surprise to me that I've made a return to tumblr, because I am just doing anything and everything I can to procrastinate right now. I told my mom that I was going to my room to do homework, and I just played Stardew Valley for 3 hours instead.

On the bright side, I'm still technically working ahead. I've managed to curb the worst of my procrastination habits so that I'm not starting my assignments on the due date. So, yay me?

I don't really have any plans for this weekend. It's Easter which is cool I guess, but I don't really celebrate it. Maybe I'll put together an Easter basket just for fun. I am planning on buying Easter cake mix and frosting when it's on sale post-holiday though, because I'm a sucker for holiday cupcakes.

How about you? What's going in your life right now?

Thanks so much for reaching back out again! I'm super looking forward to chatting with you and getting to know you better 😊

#undine answers stuff #aiko anon #mayoverse #tumblr japanese community #okay so #i've started tagging these japanese anon conversations as 'tumblr japanese community'#but maybe i should change it to 'mayoverse'???#are we all a part of the mayoverse now

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wondersbeyondcompare · 3 years

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Majid’s School Uniform Story (R)

aka riddle gets to tutor another unfortunate soul

“The library is an ideal place to nap… Just don’t tell Senior Jamil about this, okay?!”

[Location:NRC Library]

Majid: *yawns* Seems like I’ve studied enough Magic History for today. Haah… If only Mr. Trein would lighten up on the homework. So what if that essay had to be 4 pages front AND back? He should’ve been more clear about that in his lecture.

Majid: …Well, not like I was listening in the first place. *yawns* The sunlight there is always so nice in the afternoons… I can’t help but sleep a little while I’m there.

*rustle* *rustle*

Majid: Ah, and the next subject I have to work on is…Math? What a pain of a class. *yawns* If only… if only I could juusst-

*thunk*

Majid: *snoring*

*footsteps*

Riddle: Is that…

*footsteps* *THUD*

Majid: !!!

Riddle: I thought so. You’re a freshman from Scarabia, correct? The one who’s always getting pulled along by your vice dorm leader because you keep dozing off?

Majid: …Sure.

Riddle: The library is not an appropriate place to sleep. If you wanted to take a nap, then hurry back to your dorm room, and do it there.

Majid: Yeah, okay.

Riddle: You… you’ve been acting rather impudent for a while now. I’m a 2nd year, you know? You should speak to your seniors with more respect. AND no one should be using the library as a place to procrastinate like this. Not to mention the way you present yourself in your uniform… You leave me no other choice. State your name.

Majid: What for?

Riddle: Your actions have been deplorable. I need your name to report them to your dorm leader.

Majid: Haha… It’s not like the dorm leader’s gonna care much about something as small as napping. Can’t you just let this slide?

Riddle: Alright, then I’ll talk to your vice dorm leader instead.

Majid: Ah, it’s Sebek Zigvolt, sir.

Riddle: Don’t mess with me!! Sebek Zigvolt is a Diasmonia student!

Majid: Well, I never said that was my name. I was just pointing out that he was walking right behind you at that moment.

Riddle: …Ah, so he was- HOLD ON A MINUTE.

*rustle*

Riddle: AND WHERE EXACTLY DO YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING?

Majid: Tch. And I thought this would be the perfect time to escape too.

Riddle: TELL ME YOUR ACTUAL NAME, OR IT’S OFF WITH YOUR HEAD.

Majid: SH- SHAHIN, MAJID. MY NAME IS SHAHIN, MAJID, SIR;;;

Riddle: *sighs* So, Majid then. Good.

Majid: ‘What the hell’s ‘off with your head’ supposed to mean??? Is it some kind of decapitation spell???? Was I about to die a couple seconds ago??? Do the library workers have to clean up my splattered remains after this guy’s done with me??? Surely that kind of thing wouldn’t be allowed- No… our headmaster is plenty screwed up; he wouldn’t do anything to help me-’

Riddle: Majid.

Majid: !!! Yes.

Riddle: *tap* *tap* Is this a worksheet from your math class? I saw a couple of my underclassmen trying to finish it in our dorm… You should really get started on it. The deadline is tomorrow, correct?

Majid: Uh, yea- yes. I’ll go ahead and do that… sir.

Riddle: Well?

Majid: Wait, right now?

Riddle: Why not? The library is a valuable spot for information, so you could always use as many reference books as you see fit. Besides, I’m pretty sure the second you step foot in your dorm, you’ll collapse onto your bed and leave your work unfinished until the last minute.

Majid: …Are you sure we haven’t met before?

Riddle: *sighs* I was just generalizing based on what I’ve seen some of your peers do… Don’t tell me that the rest of the underclassmen are this prone to procrastination too… *rustle* Here. Start with question 1.

Majid: Fine, fine. *scribble* *scribble*

Riddle: …

Majid: *scribble* *scribble*

Riddle: Ah, that’s wrong.

Majid: Excuse me?

Riddle: That step you took right there. You forgot to distribute the negative sign to both variables.

Majid: Right… okay. Thanks.

Riddle: And on number 3, you graphed the wrong system of equations. A slope of 3/4 should be less steeper than that.

Majid: Gotcha.

Riddle: And number 2-

Majid: OKAY, okay! I get it! I did everything wrong! I’ll just erase all my answers, okay?! Jeez, you lecture as much as Jamil…

Riddle: This won’t do… At this rate… Alright.

Majid: And why are you sitting across from me now?

Riddle: It seemed like you were struggling on your own. And I have a few minutes of free time. Don’t worry; I’m at the top of my class in all of my subjects. Teaching algebra is hardly a daunting task.

Majid: But I don’t need any help. And should you really be letting your guard down to tutor someone from another dorm? Scarabia’s test scores are known for rivaling Octavinelle’s, y’know?

Riddle: Well, judging from how you answered those questions, it would be foolish to consider you a threat in the first place. Besides, what’s the point of defeating an opponent if they’re not at their best? Just consider this as a kind offer from your upperclassman to unlock your full potential.

Majid: …I can’t help but feel like I was insulted multiple times in those first two sentences, but thank you.

Riddle: Of course. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you don’t tarnish this school’s good name.

***

[Location: NRC Library (Late Afternoon)]

Riddle: TCH. I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT YOU HAD TO DO THE MULTIPLICATION SECTION FIRST, AND THEN YOU CAN ADD LIKE TERMS.

Majid: …

Riddle: AND HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO REPEAT THIS FORMULA TO YOU??? IT’S SO SIMPLE. EVEN A JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT COULD HAVE MEMORIZED THIS THE FIRST TIME IT’S TAUGHT TO THEM .

Majid: …….

Riddle: Ah… No, wait… I apologize. I didn’t mean to raise my voice… *sighs* But Majid, it’s been well over an hour now, and we’re not even halfway through your homework. Are you sure you’ve been taking this serio-

Majid: OF COURSE I’VE BEEN TAKING THIS SERIOUSLY!

Riddle: !!!!!

Majid: The teachers, hell, even my own classmates always end up asking me that same question! “If only you put a bit more effort into your studying”,; “You have a lot of potential… if only you could put a little more effort too”! As if I didn’t spend a ton of time already on my homework!! I had a shitty education when I was younger and sometimes I fall asleep in class, so I get that I won’t be as smart as everyone else, but…

Riddle: Majid…

Majid: I thought that I at least had the basics down… I guess no matter how hard I try, it’ll never be enough, huh?

Riddle: That’s not true.

Majid: Are you-

Riddle: I’m not lying to you. We can set aside your homework for now, but in the meantime, let me help you plan out some personalized study techniques. I can’t guarantee you’ll be in the top percentage of your class, but I can definitely save you from hearing those hateful words ever again. We’ll make sure your efforts don’t go to waste.

Majid: Aah… Thank you… Seriously, thank you so much…sir.

Riddle: Heh. Don’t worry about it. This is just another part of my duty as a fellow student of Night Raven College. Also make sure not to yell like that in the library ever again.

Majid: But weren’t you also just… Never mind, I understand.

Riddle: Good.

***

Majid: ‘This guy… what was his name again?’

#twisted wonderland oc #twst oc #twisted wonderland ocs #twst ocs #twst oc art #twisted wonderland oc art #art #my art #my writing #writing #Majid #unlikely pairs interacting w/ each other pt 2 lol #also another case of majid having selective memory #can remember that random diasomnia student who yells a lot but cant remember the heartslabyul dorm leader who also yells a lot #maybe he just memorized sebek’s name just to make sure he could avoid places he frequented #and majid was DEFINITELY just calling riddle sir to avoid figuring out his name #dont come at me for majid’s one sleeve up one sleeve down thing #(´；Д；`) he does it b/c i do it and i wanted solidarity #so far majid’s stories have just been him getting help from the people around him but hey #boy kinda needs all the help he can get lol besides im a sucker for people treating majid like a younger brother #Riddle

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lightacademic · 4 years

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Study tips for people who’ve never had to study before

It recently came to my attention that there are a whole load of ~highly achieving~ students out there who’ve never had to learn to study, but suddenly being naturally gifted just doesn't work anymore. I’ve been in this exact position & came out of it ok, so here are some important things I picked up along the way/wish I knew back then.

Habits. If you build good study habits early, before things start getting intense, you’ll be well set for when the stress comes. Maybe always finish your homework before tea, or come home and study for an hour before you change into sweats. Association is helpful - if you have an established routine for something else, like getting a coffee or sports training or practicing an instrument, say you’ll always study directly before or after that. Make it work for you.

Little and often. People say this about languages but it’s the same for anything. Half an hour every day is so much more effective than 3 hours in a day, once a week, and you won't feel wiped out afterwards either. This works for long term projects as well - breaking things down into manageable chunks and doing one little bit per day is much less overwhelming than sitting down and telling yourself you’re writing your whole essay today.

Time management. Parkinson’s law is real. Set yourself a limit, say you’re going to write this essay before tea, or you’re going to do this maths for no more than 2 hours. Things will drag on and fill as much time as you allow them to, especially bigger projects, so stick to a schedule. If at all possible, aim to have bigger assignments complete at least a week before they’re due, so you have time for printer problems, formatting disasters, etc etc. This ties in with organisation, which is equally important. I don’t mean perfectly drawn schedules and bullet journals (even if thats what studyblr wants us to believe) but get a diary, I use a page per day diary but you can use a notebook, wall planner, whatever. Put deadlines and classes and exams and everything in there asap, and then day to day you can make a to-do list of smaller tasks. These should be flexible, so if something comes up or a task is unexpectedly complicated, you can adapt and just add it to the next day. Don’t set your expectations too high - its better to set out to work for 4 hours and achieve that than to say you’ll do 8, only manage 4 and feel like a failure.

Your environment is important! Your desk does not have to be all white minimalism and pastel highlighters to be a good study space, but try make it as clear as possible, well lit, and free from distractions. The bigger the better. Make sure you have everything you need within reach, including a plug for a charger, if you use a laptop. Quiet is ideal but not always possible, so make yourself a playlist of background music (or try one of mine, here.) Libraries are great, because they’re literally designed for reading in and having people working around you can be really motivating. Avoid procrastination at all costs. Leave your phone somewhere far away, turn it off, or use the forest app. And try not to work where you sleep, because that won't help with your work or your sleep (bedroom is fine, in bed is not.)

Test yourself. Repeated retrieval is the best form of learning, so if you have past papers or quizzes thats great, use them! If not, writing your own questions or getting some study buddies and writing questions for each other is a good way of studying, because it forces you to think about the material in a different way.

Teach others. It’s great if you have a friend or two to revise with, but if not, try writing presentations, talking to yourself, a pet, a plant... anyone who’ll listen. Break down concepts into simpler language, as if you were explaining it to someone younger. Use flow charts and clear diagrams, and be concise. This will not only consolidate your understanding, but you'll get some great notes out of it (and presentation practice.)

Your notes do not have to be beautiful! I love looking at these aesthetic studyblr notes as much as the next person but realistically that takes hours and calligraphy is not an efficient use of your precious time. Try to keep them as concise as possible - bullet points are good - and use no more than 3 colours per page or they’ll lose meaning. Don’t go too hard with the highlighters. Arrows and annotations and post it note additions are all excellent - don’t rewrite what you’ve already got! That is not good revision. I’m sorry. Try using a whiteboard. For short answer questions, calculations, quick diagrams - anything you’d use scrap paper for - a mini white board is great. I mean something like this which is cheap and also better for the rainforests than using a whole bunch of paper that you’re just going to throw out. I *borrowed* mine from school which I do not condone but may be an option.

Take regular breaks. A good rule of thumb is that your break should be around 25% of your study time, so if you study for an hour - 15 minutes off. Study for 8 hours - 2 hours off. And take your breaks properly - get up, leave the room if you can. Get some fresh air, even if thats just opening a window, drink some coffee water, have a snack if you need it. Try not to fuel yourself on junk food - biscuits are essential but have some fruit or nuts or something as well - they actually help your brain work and you’ll feel better for it.

Don’t compare. I know this is easier said than done, but study for yourself. Find your own method, whether that’s what everyone around you does or not. Try not to compare grades, either. A little bit of competition can be healthy, but (especially around exams) don’t listen to the people who “only did 12 hours last night.” Equally, ignore the people who say they haven't studied at all and don’t let either of them get to you. You know how hard you’re working, and who know how efficient they are?

It’s never too late. This is maybe the most important thing to take away from this. You may have weeks, even days until your final/assessment/essay, but it is not too late to start studying. I’ll make a post about how to cram later, but even though its not ideal, it can definitely be the difference between a pass and a fail or an A and an A*. So if you think you’ve left it too late - you haven’t.

Good luck, and feel free to message me if you want more tips/details/a sympathetic shoulder to cry on about how hard all this is <3

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autumnleaves1991-blog · 3 years

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College AU Week 1 Day 3 - Evgeni Kolpakov

A/N: I have never written for Evgeni but I kind of love the way this turned out. Let me know what you think. Thank you for reading, reblogging, commenting, and liking. This is day three of the January AU Writing challenge/300 follower celebration!

* I posted a video I listened to while writing this if you wanted to listen while you read. It helped inspire me.

Pairing: Evgeni Kolpakov X G.N Reader (please let me know if I missed any pronouns)

Warning: I don’t think anything, it’s pretty romantic/fluffy.

My Masterlist

My computer crashed, and you're the student worker at the IT center.

Most people would be happy to have a night off from work. Ordinary people who don't go to school all day, spending their evenings at the IT center troubleshooting with students who've procrastinated their assignments. Shouting at you because their computer has decided to crash or their internet in their dorm has failed. Honestly, any person who works in customer service would be happy with a night off and away, but not you. Not since he first called.

You sigh, thinking of the way his voice makes you hum in the squeaky rolling chair you find yourself perched on nightly. The Russian accent thick and shooting straight through your core as he talks to you about everything and nothing, making your heart beat faster. Evgeni, the enigma from your work who never failed to call you every evening for the past month; you'd never seen him, nothing more than a voice on the phone. His words honey to your ears as he makes you laugh. You want to know him. You have to know him.

"Hey! Are you okay there? You seemed really out of it," your friend Charlotte looks concerned until you smile and embrace her outside the club.

"Oh, I'm okay just thinking about someone," you pull back, and she grins.

"Oh, is this about the mysterious caller that has your brain in a tizzy? Are you missing him already?" she teases, and you nod. The smell of cigarettes and cheap perfume waft onto the darkened street outside the piano bar. The ivories' tickling makes you think of Evgeni and how some nights he would play his piano over the phone. He was a very talented player, and you dreamed of hearing him play in person. The way his hands would move across the keys as he would coax the sweet music from them.

Charlotte taps you on the shoulder and points to the bar, "I'm sure he can survive without you for one evening."

"He wasn't able to call tonight; he had a prior engagement."

"He plays the piano, right?"

"Yes." You see the wheels turning in her head as she points towards the bar, "No, he didn't mention that he was playing anywhere tonight, just that he had something and wouldn't be able to call." You open the door and step inside, her following close behind. The bar is lit up on one wall with a single spotlight on the small stage. A black baby grand piano sits atop it, and the sounds of the keys sing to your heart.

You walk over to the bartender, order a gin and tonic and take a seat at a two-seater towards the middle of the club. Taking a moment to soak in the music before you observe the player. He's handsome in a white button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows; the chords in his arms shine under the light. He's got on a black fedora, but you can see the hint of a buzz cut underneath. His face with a light speckling of stubble just beginning to form—smoke curling from the ashtray perched on the top and a half-drunken glass of red wine.

As the piece comes to a close, you feel yourself in a slow trance. The world around you slowing down as the music fades, and he does a small bow of his head as the crowd erupts into applause. You sit there frozen as he reaches for the cigarette, pulling drag and holding it between his fingers. Almost as if he can feel the magnetic pull, he looks up into your eyes, and you drown in the deep brown of his own. Lips parting on a small gasp when his gaze sears into your soul and ignites the fire in your blood.

He leans towards the microphone, "Thank you, everyone, for this next piece…" but you stop listening as your heart stops. You would know that voice anywhere. It's the voice you'd heard every single day for the last month, the one who colors your dreams. The voice you dream of as you touch yourself at night, wishing it was really him whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

***********

One Month Ago

The phone rings more than you would believe for an evening IT department, and you pick up on the second ring already opening the form to fill out for the request. "Thank you for calling the NYU IT department helpline; this is Y/N; how can I help you?"

"Yes, hello, my computer keeps crashing when I try to submit an assignment," a man with a deep Russian accent coos in your ear.

"Okay, and have you tried turning it on and off again?" He sighs and agrees, going through all the usual motions of a phone call this late.

"Well, it would seem to be an issue with the server, I will put in a work order request for the IT department heads to take a look, and they will get back to you within 24-48 hours."

He let out a groan, "But I need to submit the assignment tonight. Listen, I am not some privileged child who waited until the last minute to submit the assignment. I take night classes for business and work all day as a security guard. I really need to get this turned in on time. Please, there must be something you can do." Something about the tone in his voice gives you pause.

"Maybe…" you try to think, "maybe I can send your professor a formal message from the IT department and submit your assignment for you. Can you email it to me?"

He agrees, and he scrambles for a pencil, writing down your email and quickly sending it off. His name pops up a few minutes later, Evgeni Kolpakov. "Evgeni? Where are you from?"

You can hear the amusement in his tone when he says, "Vermont."

You let out a chuckle, "Vermont really?"

"A refugee camp in Vermont," oh shit, you try to apologize, but he lets out a laugh, "It's okay. Vermont is full of surprises, you know."

"Oh really now," you finish composing the email and attach his essay before sending it, "done, it's sent." He lets out a relieved breath.

"Thank you so much," he chuckles, "what do I owe you for the trouble?"

"Tell me more about Vermont," you smile and lean back as he fills you with stories of his childhood. You spend two hours on the phone, and when you look at the clock and gasp, he quickly apologizes.

"I'm sorry about taking so much of your time...but I'm not sorry for talking to you," you can hear him put something down in the background, and you sigh.

"I'm not either," you whisper, "this has been one of the best nights I've ever had at this job."

He chuckles, "You mean the universities IT department is not a bustling hub of excitement during the evening?"

You laugh, "No...would you," you know you shouldn't ask, but you can't help yourself, "would you call again if you had any other problems?" I work ten to four in the morning this week."

"I promise," his voice gets more profound as you hold your breath, "I will call back tomorrow with another problem if only to talk to you again."

You tremble at his tone and hang up with a longing, "I'll be waiting."

***********

Present Day

"Evgeni," you whisper under your breath, but it's almost like he can hear as his head snaps up and looks at you again. His hands are poised above the keys, and he smiles.

"This is for you," he whispers and makes love to you through the music. A personal symphony just for you as his fingers caress the keys like the ways of a lover.

You listen, transfixed eyes never leaving him, your drink, Charlotte, and the world around you fading into nothing until it's just you and him alone. The music swarms around you, and you feel yourself rising slowly towards him as the song ends and the cheers of the crowd flow. But you don't care as he stands and holds out a hand for you to take, leading you outside and into the fresh air. The chill December evening shocks you back into reality.

The feeling of his jacket, he grabbed draped over your shoulder as he rests his forehead against your own, and you feel the rough exterior against your back. "It's you," he whispers, and you feel his moist breath upon your lips.

"It's you," you reply before closing the distance between you and sealing your lips together in a kiss that is soft and gentle. He groans, placing his hands on your cheeks and pulling you closer, deepening the kiss. You feel alive and consumed by him as he takes control and melds you to him, caressing you like his fingers caressed the keys on the baby grand.

When he pulls away, you both smile, "I've been waiting for you," he whispers against your lips.

"Oh Evgeni, I've been waiting for you too." The long days of waiting for the phone to ring are long gone as your fantasies and realities bleed together to make one complete vision. Love.

Taglist: @oldstuffnewstuff @yespolkadotkitty @heythere-mel @justanotherblonde23 @artsymaddie @anetteaneta @lunarthoughts @aellynera @lucifer- @houseofthirst @chicken-ona-stick @phoenixhalliwell @letoartreiides

Tagging some extra people who may be interested (I hope that’s okay, let me know if not): @writefightandflightclub @tinygaydemonbby @itspdameronthings @damerondjarin @wasicskosgirl

I listened to this while writing if you wanna listen while reading:

youtube

#evgeni kolpakov #evgeni kolpakov x reader #January Writing Challenge #W.E AU #W.E #Oscar Isaac #300 follower celebration #Autumn Writes

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bffsoobin · 4 years

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lean on me

↳ finals week was looming and the world only continued to pile on. pushing the limits of the human brain became your new full time job as you tried to cram every piece of information into your head. one late night at the library becomes the straw that breaks the camel’s back and Taehyun comes to the rescue.

➤ slight angst, fluff, college!au

Word Count: 1,881

Requested?: yes

Warnings: self doubt and language!

A/N: I’m sorry if this isn’t reflective of what actual finals week feels like, lmao. I only had one finals week this year and I go to a liberal arts college where finals are “encouraged but not required”. Considering that, I tried my best to channel into my general stress from the week before winter break where all of my profs decided to have huge things due. Anywhooooo- the normal warnings that I didn’t proof read or edit apply here as always!

•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:••:•.

The words on your notebook seemed to be running together more severely the longer you stared at them. You weren’t sure how long you had been trying to absorb the notes from your entire semester of lectures, but you felt as if you had been sitting in the desk chair for about five years. Rolling your shoulders back only relieved some of the tension in your muscles. With a heaving sigh, you made a shaky note in your planner to schedule with your chiropractor at the end of the week.

Finals week was shaping up to kill you. It was Saturday night, but instead of partying or spending the night cuddled up with your boyfriend, you were melting your brain into mush in the library. In a futile attempt to soothe the headache stinging behind your eyes, you pressed the heel of your palm into your forehead. Nothing changed other than the amount of frustration bottled up inside your chest. When you had scheduled at the beginning of the semester, your advisor warned you against taking all of these classes at once. As you added up all the material you needed to review, you could see why she had seemed so spooked for you.

Of course you had kept up all semester, but none of that seemed to matter right now as you were staring at two large presentations, three essays and two 3 hour long exams in the face. So that’s why you were here, occupying an entire table with highlighted notes and annotated textbooks. Truthfully, you had no clue what time it was as you pulled your computer closer to work on your presentation slides. For a class that you took as an elective, Art History has proven to be a complete pain in the ass. Clicking through your partially finished presentation, you suddenly became overwhelmed with the true gravity of the week ahead. All you wanted to do was crawl underneath the table and curl into a ball, but the nagging voice in the back of your mind reminded you that procrastinating would only make this week so much worse.

With a sigh you settled further into your seat and steadied your hands on your laptop keyboard and waited for motivation to strike. Your fingers skimmed over the keys for a few seconds as you typed half a bullet point and deleted it, unhappy with the wording. You glanced over at your notes, searching for a certain statistic that you knew was hiding somewhere in the pages. Where the hell was it? Moving the notebook closer to your face didn’t give you the insight you hoped it would as you continued to struggle. Irritation had you pulling at the roots of your hair as you continued to scan the pages within the chapter you had chosen to report on for your final project.

You whined quietly, knowing that your overtired eyes were keeping you from advancing through the one thing you had for sure wanted to accomplish tonight.

“Fine,” you mumbled, “I guess I can just study for Chemistry.” The sound of your laptop snapping shut resonated through the sparsely populated library and made you cringe. Too lazy to actually pick up the hulking textbook, you simply pulled it toward you and watched the cover glide over the sleek library table. Fatigue was clawing at the back of your eyes, begging for you to succumb and lay down to drool on your much too expensive textbook. You fought off the urge with a quick swig of your iced coffee and a pinch to the fat of your cheek.

You still weren’t sure how long you’d been studying, but you felt as if your brain was about to explode cartoon style all over the wall. Even your favorite vanilla iced coffee had done nothing to increase your awareness, as you found yourself stuck in the perpetual loop of rereading a single paragraph about how to do gram to mole conversions. In the back of your mind, you knew it was time to pack up and go home. It was only now that you heard the insistent humming of the fluorescent lights that dotted the ceiling sporadically. Your left eye twitched. It was time to admit defeat and make the walk back to your apartment.

The night was surprisingly calm, and even in the late hour (early morning?) the air was infused with a comfortable warmth that made you feel a bit more at ease despite the looming tension headache you could feel. With the route memorized and your body set on the soft embrace of your bed, the walk back to your apartment was quick and easy. Once you stepped inside, you noticed lights on in the small kitchen and the low hum of a comedy special on the television. Your heart dropped into your stomach at the sound of hurried footsteps heading toward the front door. Taehyun.

Your boyfriend stood in front of you, mouth open wide and eyes scrunched together in worry. An apology was already on the tip of your tongue before he began to speak.

“Where have you been?” his words were saturated with a level of concern that made your heart crack like an eggshell. “I texted and called you all night! I was so worried, Y/N. Do you even know what time it is?” You noticed that his hair was ruffled and the way that half circles of darkness underlined his usually bright eyes before your brain could even register the weak timbre of his voice.

What you wouldn’t give to melt into your slightly scuffed wooden floors. At the mention of time, you dug into the front pocket of your bookbag until you found the piece of technology you had inadvertently ignored almost all day. In bright, glaring numbers it read 1:34. You winced at the time combined with the bundled up text and call notifications, all from Taehyun.

“I’m so sorry,” your voice dwindled as the full weight of your mistake settled into your chest. The idea of Taehyun sitting around your shared apartment all night, alone and worrying about you, pulled a shaky sob from your chest. You risked a glance his way and soon became helpless to the dam of pent up emotions finally breaking down. “I didn’t,” you sucked in a shuddering breath, “mean to leave you hanging I-I just,” your voice runs dry and sticks in your throat as hot tears continue to streak down your cheeks. Taehyun’s feet, encased in the socks you had gotten him for your anniversary, entered your limited field of view before you felt his arms fastening around your shaking form. His familiar scent only sent you straight into even more upset.

“I was at the library studying all night and I forgot to tell you- god, how could I forget? I’m so sorry, Taehyun, I’ve just been so overwhelmed with all my finals and I was trying not to get distracted so I put my phone away-” Taehyun shushed you, carding through your hair with a careful hand as you cried into his sweater.

“It’s okay, love. I was just worried that you were hurt, I’m not mad about it, I promise. I know you’re overwhelmed with finals,” he gently guided you toward your shared bedroom as you continued to gasp for air through your tears.

“No! I was a bad girlfriend. You deserve to be mad at me! I could have just sent you a text but I was too stupid to even think about that,” you sniffled until you felt like your nose was no longer running. Taehyun tutted in disagreement as he finally sat you down against your plush pillows.

“Do not ever,” he grabbed a tissue and wiped the most obvious tears off of your face, “say that you’re a bad girlfriend. You’re just forgetful sometimes. Focused on one thing at a time. I know that you’re worried about finals, and I didn’t mean to make you feel any worse,” he kept his gaze steady on you even as you felt the urge to look away. You knew he was right. Your stress had been mounting so high that the mere thought of Taehyun being upset with you had overfilled your glass.

Taehyun turned away from you and for a second your breath stilled in your lungs. Was he actually mad? Was he collecting his thoughts before explaining all the scenarios he had worried over while you were gone? In the midst of your worrying, you had missed the way he rifled through your drawers to find you an outfit which he settled gently onto your lap.

“Here,” his voice was impossibly soft, “get changed, you’ve been wearing that since we went for lunch earlier.” Like his words had casted a magic spell, you registered the uncomfortable pinch from the waistband of your jeans and got up to quickly change as he busied himself with pulling down the covers on your bed. He welcomed you into the bed with open arms that you readily crawled into. Admittedly, you still felt a bit like an awful person for not even texting him, but you knew there was nothing more you could say. Taehyun pulled you into his chest, intertwining your hands and wedging them between your bodies.

The position was warm and intimate and helped to soothe the headache still vibrating behind your eyes.

“You’re amazing, you know that, right?” his nose was only inches away from yours, and you couldn’t resist the urge to bump them together. A wide smile sprawled onto his face. “You’re going to do amazing on finals, love. You always do. My smart baby,” a deep blush bloomed across your cheeks. For as long as you’d known and dated Taehyun, he never failed to fluster you with the right words. Taehyun’s eyes crinkled at your reaction.

“You’re my cute baby, too. You know what else I think about you?” His voice was lulling you into a sleep that you quite frankly hadn’t expected to come across so quickly. Lazily, you hummed in place of asking a question.

“I think you’re my baby who deserves to give herself a day off. You can’t run yourself ragged all week, love,” he carefully untangled your hands laying between the two of you to drag his fingers over the sensitive skin of your cheeks. “I hate seeing you so worn out, especially this early in the week. It scares me,” your eyes fluttered back open at the shake in his voice. A new stream of tears snuck out of your eye without you noticing.

“I’m sorry, Taehyun. I promise I’ll take tomorrow off. We can…” your mind blanked into a lovely fuzzy place as fatigue began to drag your eyelids down again. “I dunno, we can deal with that ‘morrow,” you offered weakly. Taehyun’s cool fingertips ghosted over your closed eyes as he hummed in agreement. He pulled you closer to his chest and you took the opportunity to tuck your face into his neck and sigh in content. A firm hand ran down the expanse of your back as all of your stress was carried away by peaceful slumber. No matter how crazy this week got, you knew you had Taehyun to lean on.

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awed-frog · 3 years

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Do you have any advice for someone who’s really struggling to study? I’m really stressed and demotivated, and I can’t seem to sit down and just study. In my country we only have virtual classes so maybe It has something to do with that, it’s really sad that it’s my first college year and I haven’t attended one single face to face class. Anyway, If you have any kind words I would really appreciate it. Love your blog btw <3

Hey! Thank you for this! And I’m very sorry you feel that way...just know you’re not alone, I think we’re all a bit ‘what’s the point’ rn, and for students (and teachers) this period must suck especially hard. I don’t know exactly what can work for you, but here are a few things that come to mind. I hope you can find something useful!

Have habits and routines. Our days are all over the place, which is not good for motivation or mental health. Instead of procrastinating, feeling guilty, working in a hurry and then feeling even worse, decide on a schedule that works for you. Don’t be too hard on yourself - give it as much time as you need to do the work well, and devote the rest of your day to stuff that makes you feel accomplished and serene (maybe learn or practice a non-screen skill, such as cooking or painting?).

And: at risk of sounding like a yoga mom, don’t forget about your body. Very often stuff like bad mood or exhaustion has physical, not mental, causes. Try to make time for sport - dancing in your underwear, running outside, walking the dog, online pilates, a 7-minute app - and, if you can, a few minutes of meditation, singing or breathing exercises every day. I’d recommend the ‘cardiac coherence’ stuff - lasts about 3 minutes, makes you feel really great. And: remember to stretch, smile and drink water throughout the day. If possible, go outside or have plants and flowers around you.

When it comes to habit, try to understand what kind of person you are and react accordingly. Some people work best when they change cold turkey (new day, new me), while for others it’s better to adjust things more slowly (for instance by moving the alarm clock forward five minutes every week or two). If you’re the second type, a method like Pomodoro could work well to organize your work schedule.

Have pretty things. Try switching to ink or coloured pens, have nice stationery, organize your Word documents so they’re neat and tidy, use candles, plants, ‘good mood’ incense - whatever makes you feel your work has meaning and worth.

Try background music. Some people work better with noise, and you can find all kind of noises online, from stations to coffee shops to purring cats. Others like classical music. For me, what works is video game music, which is designed to keep you alert and focused while being unobtrusive.

Try to keep your workspace as similar as possible to a ‘real’ workspace. No stack of dirty mugs and plates, no abandoned pajama bottoms. If you can manage it, start your day as if you were actually going outside - dress for actual human company, put on make-up if you like to - and remember to prepare your desk the night before: textbooks, charged laptop, notebooks, water bottle, possibly a diary or a motivational quote or anything you find useful.

If it helps, study with friends or classmates. Have video meetings, chats or shared Google docs and work together. Rant with people who’re going through the same thing, but also find a way to help one another. If you live with flatmates or family members, maybe you can find a moment to work together on your separate things? Dad does admin, mom prepares a work presentation, you do your homework and that’s ‘work time’ for everyone?

Divide your tasks. Make clear lists of what you have to do - as detailed as possible (not: shakespeare essay, but: 1. read book, 2. write essay, 2b. introduction and so on) and pay attention to when the stuff is due, either writing it down in agendas or post-its or creating alerts on your phone. Some people also like the square of doom (you know, that ‘important + urgent’, ‘important + non urgent’ thingy).

Keep track of what you’re doing if you find it helps you. There are good apps for this, or you can use a nice journal or an Excel sheet. Track whatever you want - minutes of study, words learned, tasks accomplished...a favourite of mine is ‘a time logger’, which can track your entire day. When I was in uni, it made me realize I was working a lot more than I thought, and reaching daily goals kept me motivated.

Rethink your internet consumption, especially news, TV shows and social media. Try having periods where you go off-screen whenever you need a break. Stuff like, ‘no TV before 6 pm’ or ‘no tumblr on weekdays’ can automatically make you a lot less stressed and a lot more productive.

You can also decide to modify the way you engage with these things. For instance, if your studies involve a language, you could watch only TV shows in [language], or turn on [language] subtitles, or you could switch to Buzzfeed [country]. If you like IG, pinterest or tumblr, try having a separate ‘weekday’ account which is about healthy escapism and/or accountability: landscapes and poetry instead of fandom content, or a personal blog about your day - use the right tags and connect with others who’re going through the same thing.

Imagine you’re teaching someone. I’m guessing you’re passionate about your subject, so turn your study sessions into imaginary conversations. Teaching a lesson (or making a speech) is often the best way to see what you understand, what you need to work on, and what you’re interested in learning more about.

Websites like b-ok can help you find books about your subject (or not) - possibly stuff you’re not actually compelled to read, but which sounds interesting nonetheless. Broaden your horizon, discover different stuff, and sooner or later you’ll find yourself making connections between the exciting stuff you’re basically reading for fun and the actual subject you’re studying.

And: remember why you’re studying this. What are you passionate about? Why did you fall in love with your subject? Why are you studying it? Sometimes we have to endure a few boring classes to get to the good part, and that’s okay.

And finally: visualize the future. The world will get better, and at some point you’ll be glad you’ve spent a few (or many) hard and boring hours getting your degree. What are you going to do after this? Make a ‘future’ board, write a fake Wikipedia article about yourself, give a Nobel or graduation speech, give a pep talk to your (imaginary) future children about the hardships you faced on Zoom and how you overcame them to become the mom they know and love. Whatever works, no matter how ridiculous or narcissistic or far-fetched is a good thing!

I hope this helps! Remember to remain calm and positive, and talk to yourself as if you were talking to a child or a best friend. Less You suck and the world is going to end and more Yes, you didn’t do great today, but we can always do better tomorrow, it’s okay to have an off day! Uni is hard enough under any circumstances, and right now...do your best and resist the bait of dark thoughts: we will get through this, and everything will be alright. It’s how it works.

#ask #studying #students problems #life tips #life advice #motivation #anxiety #mental help #singing about the dark times #you can do this <3

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mary-is-writing · 3 years

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~ Friday Update

Hey remember those 2 or 3 months where I would do this regularly without fail? Ah, good times.

So, update!! I finished a short story for a contest and sent it yesterday. Im very happy how it turned out!! It has this kinda-goth vibe that I really like and I got to write about all the points I wanted to. But maybe because of that I'm afraid it reads as a bit pretentious 😅 Well, I'm happy and the story is done, so that's what matters.

In other news, a little online course I'm taking about detective/police literature will end next week. It was very informative ngl, and I'm glad because it's definitely gonna help me when I write that mystery novel I'm still planning. It was all mostly theory regarding the genre and examples of writers and stories, but we're talking about doing some essays that will get published. To be honest, I'm still not sure if I'll participate there -essays are not really my thing- but I have one or two ideas about the topic I'd choose.

However, next month there'll be another little course about the same genre, this one with a focus on crearive writing!! I'm definitely gonna take it, I just have to finish the inscription process (fingers crossed that I don't procrastinate this 😅😅)

I'm not writing a lot these days, but I've managed to get nice progress on my comic. The thing I can say about my wips is that I wanna do more for them, I just don't know what. Mock covers? Posts? A PowerPoint presentation? All of that interests me, but they also seem like they'll take a lot of time to do, time I should be focusing on writing...

Well, if I decide to do any of that, you csn be sure I'll post them here owo)

#writeblr #writers #writing #friday update #Also my computer is SO SLOW today idk what's happening

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adhd-sorcha · 4 years

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hi again! thank you for answering my last ask, it was super helpful! since you mentioned stimming not being one of the main symptoms to look for in adhd, what are better symptoms to watch out for? i think i've got the inattentive type of adhd, or maybe combination. i hope i'm not asking too many questions or bothering you too much! :)

Hello again! There’s absolutely no problem with asking plenty of questions. All of this stuff can be difficult to navigate on your own.

Just for anyone who’s unfamiliar, ADHD traits are broken into two main categories: 1) Inattentive 2) Hyperactive/Impulsive Depending on where most of your traits lie, your ADHD will be classed as predominantly inattentive, predominantly hyperactive/impulsive or combined. Generally, you’ll get one of the ‘predominantly’ diagnoses if you only meet the diagnostic criteria for one of the two categories.

Here is a link to a PDF of the DSM 5 entry for ADHD

Here is a link to the criteria on another web page (Not a PDF. This has slightly more simplified wording. At the end of the page there is a link to a PDF of a screener used for ADHD assesments in adults. It’s interesting to read as it goes through each of the 18 DSM criteria and lists examples of behaviours that those criteria refer to. Handy! Because it’s not always clear what exactly counts as a yes or a no with the DSM...)

Now, that’s just some reading you could do, but I’ll give a short list of what I think are the big ones to watch out for as someone who has the inattentive sub-type.

1) Difficulty with tasks that require sustained focus - Like...writing posts? ...ehe. - Or essays. Or cleaning the bathroom... - You may take breaks between each step (Hello scrolling on my phone between taking a shower and drying my hair!) - Can become very tired very quickly if forced to focus

2) Avoiding tasks that require sustained focus - Looks like chronic procrastination - May include, avoiding my very long posts XD

3) Spacing out while other people are speaking directly to you - I find this is especially true for when someone is giving verbal instructions. - (RIP all those people trying to explain calculations to me without writing anything down T_T)

4) Spacing out while speaking yourself.

5) Completely losing your train of thought mid-sentence but you haven’t spaced out. - You’re fully conscious of that fact that you are speaking right now, but your brain has suddenly blanked on what you were speaking about/suddenly can’t even remember what the rest of the conversation was, no mind say where you were trying to take it! - Feels like someone suddenly wiped your brain

6) Having difficulty recalling words - “Can you pass me the.........thing??”

7) Little to no concept of time - May have difficulty reading clocks - Have no internal sense of time/not able to guess how much time has passed - Struggles with concepts like “I have an appointment next week” or “My friend’s birthday is next month”, - May not be able to prepare appropriately for things that are happening in the future because of this (I’m a terror for forgetting to buy presents for birthday’s that I knew were coming!)

8) Difficulty with organisation or prioritising tasks - Kind of related to 7 - With no proper sense of ‘the future’ it can be a challenge to organise your to-dos or to even pick which hobbies to do today - Choice paralysis can come into this too. We often struggle to choose what should be done now when we have too many options.

9) Having an ‘all-or-nothing’ attitude to tasks - Either the whole thing gets done now, or none of it gets done - Also can be related to 7

10) The more steps a task has, the more likely you are to avoid it - These steps can be as small as ‘need to open the cupboard door to get the food out’, ‘take lid off of wash basket’

11) Sensory issues - You may have certain textures or sounds that are particularly uncomfortable/cause you pain when they seem to have no effect on anyone else - Maybe you keep the brightness turned down on all your screens? - Maybe you avoid busy, noisy places?

12) Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) and emotional dysregulation - RSD = an exaggerated response to real or perceived rejection or criticism - This can contribute to procrastination as well as a need to be ‘perfect’ - People with ADHD have difficulty regulating emotions and may have big responses to things - This is a big part of why people (especially AFAB people) are so often misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder before getting their ADHD diagnosis.

13) Hyperfocus - A really intense form of focus that is difficult to come out of. - May go hours working on a task without eating, drinking, going to the bathroom, moving - Won’t even notice time passing (not really a surprise considering no.7!)

14) Daydreaming. All the daydreaming. So. Much. Daydreaming. - Maybe even to the point of maladaptive daydreaming - If not, may still experience immersive daydreaming

Okay, this was meant to be a short list! I’m going to stop here because I feel like I could go on forever! There is plenty of more examples in the screening test at the end of the page of the second link. It goes into the hyperactive/impulsive traits too, which I don’t particularly experience.

Even reading over this I’m thinking of more examples of traits but if I make this too long, people with ADHD will probably struggle to read it T_T

I tried to include some stuff that you don’t normally see in diagnostic criteria because they are usually based on what we look like to other people.

#answered asks #the-blackberry-system #adhd #actually adhd #adhd traits #long post #again XD #woops #i don't know how to shut up #i've checked the links so they should work #but technology can be tricksy #so let me know if they're not working for ye

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lesbeet · 4 years

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not to be a nerd but i accidentally just wrote a whole impromptu essay about editing ndjsdksksk im throwing it under a cut bc it's fucking inane and really long but honestly... i just want other people to become as passionate about editing as i am lmaooooo

i also recommend 2 books in the post so if anything at least check those out!

quality books about editing... *chef's kiss* a lot of the basic ones (including blog posts online n such) are geared towards beginners and end up repeating the same info/advice, much of it either oversimplified or misrepresented tbh. but i read one yesterday and i'm reading another one right now that really convey this passion for editing + consideration for it as its own sort of art and i just!!

it's such a weird thing to be passionate about lmao but i AM and i've spent a lot of time the past year or so consciously honing my craft (ik i mention this like 4 times a week i'm just really proud of how much i've learned and improved) and kind of like. solidifying my instincts into conscious choices i guess?

and these GOOD editing books have both a) taught me new information and/or presented familiar information through a new perspective that helped me understand something differently or in more depth, and b) validated or even just put into words certain preferences or techniques that i've developed on my own, that i don't normally see on those more basic lists i mentioned

btw the book i finished yesterday is self-editing for fiction writers: how to edit yourself into print by renni brown and dave king, and the one i'm reading currently is the artful edit: on the practice of editing yourself by susan bell.

the former was pretty sharp and straightforward. the authors demonstrated some of their points directly in the text, which was usually funny enough that i would show certain quotes to my sister without context

("Just think about how much power a single obscenity can have if it’s the only one in the whole fucking book." <- (it was)

"Frequent italics have come to signal weak writing. So you should never resort to them unless they are the only practical choice, as with the kind of self-conscious internal dialogue shown above or an occasional emphasis."

or, my favorite: "There are a few stylistic devices that are so “tacky” they should be used very sparingly, if at all. First on the list is emphasis quotes, as in the quotes around the word “tacky” in the preceding sentence. The only time you need to use them is to show you are referring to the word itself, as in the quotes around the word “tacky” in the preceding sentence. Read it again; it all makes sense.")

and like i said, i also learned some new ideas or techniques (or they articulated vague ideas i already had but struggled to put into practice), AND they mentioned some suggestions that ive literally never seen anyone else bring up (not to say no one has! just that ive never seen it, and ive seen a lot in terms of writing tips, advice, best practices, etc) that ive already sort of established in my own writing

for example they went into pretty fine detail about dialogue mechanics, more than i usually see, and in talking about the pacing and proportion of "beats" and dialogue in a given scene, they explicitly suggested that, if a character speaks more than a sentence or two and you plan on giving them some sort of dialogue tag or an action to perform as a beat, the tag or action should be placed at one of the earliest (if not the first) natural pauses in the dialogue, so as not to distance the character too far from the dialogue -- bc otherwise the reader ends up getting all of the dialogue information first, and then has to go back and retroactively insert the character, or what they're doing, or the way they look/sound while they're giving their little speech

and like this was something ive figured out on my own, mostly bc it jarred me out of something i was reading enough times (probably in fic tbh) that i started noticing it, and realized that it's something i do naturally, kind of to anchor the character to the dialogue mechanic to make sure it makes sense with the actual dialogue

so like. ok here's an example i just randomly pulled from the song of achilles (it was available on scribd so i just looked for a spot that worked to illustrate my point djsmsks)

the actual quote is written effectively, but here's a less effective version first:

“Perhaps I would, but I see no reason to kill him. He’s done nothing to me," Achilles answered coolly.

see and even with such a short snippet it's so much smoother and more vivid just by moving the dialogue tag, not adding or cutting a word:

“Perhaps I would, but I see no reason to kill him.” Achilles answered coolly. “He’s done nothing to me.”

the rhythm of it is better, and the beat that the dialogue tag creates functions as a natural dramatic pause before achilles delivers an incredibly poignant line, both within the immediate context of the scene and because we as the readers can recognize it as foreshadowing. plus, it flows smoothly because that beat was inserted where the dialogue already contained a natural pause, just bc that's how people speak. if you read both versions aloud, they both make sense, but the second version (the original used in the novel) accounts for the rhythm of dialogue, the way people tend to process information as they read, AND the greater context of the story, and as a result packs significantly more purpose, information, and effect into the same exact set of words

and THAT, folks, is the kind of editing minutia i can literally sit and hyperfocus on for hours without noticing. anyway it's a good book lmao

the one i'm reading now is a lot more about the cognitive process/es of editing, so there's less concrete and specific advice (so far, anyway) and more discussion about different mental approaches to editing, as well as tips and tools for making a firm distinction between your writer brain and your editor brain, which is something i struggle with

but there have been so many good quotes that ive highlighted! a lot of just like. reminders and things to think about, and also just lovely articulations of things id thought of or come to understand in much more vague ways.

scribd won't let me copy/paste this one bc it's a document copy and not an actual ebook, but this passage is talking about how the simple act of showing a piece of writing to someone else for the very first time can spark a sudden shift in perspective on the work, bc you'll (or at least i) frantically try to re-read it through their eyes and end up noticing a bunch of new errors -

or she talked about the perils of constant re-reading in the middle of writing a draft, which is something i struggle with a LOT, both bc i'm a perfectionist and bc i prefer editing to writing so i sit and edit when i'm procrastinating doing the actual hard work of writing lmao

it's just this side of fake deep tbh but i so rarely see editing discussed like this--as a mixture of art and science, a collaboration between instinct and technique, that really requires "both sides of the brain" to be done well.

and because of the way my own brain works, activities that require such a balanced concentration of creativity and logic really appeal to me. even though ive seen a lot of people (even professional writers) who frame it as the creative art of writing vs the logical discipline of editing. but i think that's such a misleading way of thinking about it, because writing and editing both require creativity and logic -- just different kinds! (not to mention that the line between writing and editing, while mostly clear, can get a little blurry from up close)

but like...all stories have an inner logic to them, even if the writer hasn't explicitly or consciously planned it, and even if the logic is faulty in places in the first couple of drafts. when you're sitting and daydreaming about your story, especially if you're trying to figure out how to bridge the gap between two points or scenes (or, how to write a sequence of events that presents as a logical, inevitable progression of cause and effect), the voice in your head that evaluates an idea and decides to 1) go with it, 2) scrap it, 3) tweak it until it works, or 4) hold onto it in case you want it later? that's your logic! if an idea feels wrong, or like it just doesn't work, it's probably because some part of you is detecting a conflict between some part of the idea and the overall logic of your story. every decision you make as you write is formed by and checked against your own experiential logic, and also by the internal logic of your story, which is far less developed (or at least, one would hope), and therefore more prone to the occasional laspe

but while ive seen a number of articles that discuss the logic of writing, i don't see people gushing as much about the art of editing and it's such a shame

the inner editor is so often characterized as the responsible parent to the writer's carefree child, or a relentless critic of the writer's unselfconscious, unpolished drivel

and it's like... maybe you just hate thinking critically about your work! maybe you view it that way because you're imposing external standards too fiercely onto your writing, and it's sucked the joy out of shaping and sculpting your words until they sing. maybe you prefer to conceive of your writing as divine communication, the process of which must remain unencumbered by lessons learned through experience or the vulnerability of self-reflection, until the buzzkill inner editor shows up with all those "rules" and "conventions" that only matter if you're trying to get published

and like obviously the market doesn't dictate which conventions are worth following, but the majority of widely-agreed-upon writing standards, especially those aimed at beginners, (and most especially those regarding style, as opposed to story structure) have to do with the effectiveness and efficiency of prose, and, in addition to often serving as a shorthand for distinguishing an amateur from a pro, overall help to increase poignancy and clarity, which is crucial no matter the genre or type of writing. and even if you personally believe otherwise, it's better to understand the conventions so you can break them with real purpose.

so editing shouldn't be about trying to shove your pristine artistic masterpiece into a conventional mold, it should be about using the creative instincts of your ear and your logic and experience-based understanding of writing as a craft to hone your words until you've told your story as effectively as possible

thank u for coming to my ted talk ✌️

#long post //#editing #wref #sefa rambles

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daytodaymusings · 5 years

Text

23 things that have led me to where I am now... (24)

It’s crazy to think that I turned 24 yesterday ... this past year has been one heck of a rollercoaster (and no I am not trying to make a Jonas brother pun here). I’ve had so many experiences on both a small and big scale all of which I’ll take with me in year twenty four and more. But here’s a breakdown of the twenty three BIG ones.

1. I attended a Jonas Brothers Concert ... and it was by far THE BEST present I’ve ever given myself. After years of pining over them *looks over at life size poster in the living room* and screaming their lyrics on the top of my lungs with my best friends I finally got the chance to see THE Jonas Brothers LIVE. IN CONCERT. Not to mention, I got to touch Nick and possibly Joe? (I don’t know the night was a blur from the excitement and disbelief). Such a massive moment in my friendship with S too!

2. I lost my Grandmother ... who I had just spoken to the night before on the phone. who I adore more than anything in the world. who got me started on soap operas and washing my hands after I touch everything. who broke her arm trying to keep me from falling out of the bed when I was younger and made fun of me for putting on make up when I was older. & who made me laugh because she was so cute and lively and had such a personality. It hurts that I was worlds away when it happened and it hurts knowing that I don’t have someone to go back to anymore, in what used to be my favorite place in the world. Hold on tight to the ones you love, kids. You never know when you’ll be saying your last “I love you”. (You love me)

3. I celebrated my other Grandmother’s birthday with a surprise trip ... we went on a cruise with the majority of the family and I had such a great time celebrating and laughing with her. May have also developed asthma from all the smoke inhalation because someone just HAD to get all the BINGO letters for the $100 prize at the casinos... *spoiler alert: we didn’t get it* But we did make it away with a bag of chocolates stolen from a secret birthday event for her and others. Grandma drunk on laughter = the best kind of drunk.

4. I started nursing school ... because I finally realized what makes my heart skip a beat. It isn’t just having the ability to care for another human being. I love watching sick babies recover and finally get to go home, seeing the faces of first time parents and grandparents when they hold their newborn. I love the coo-ing noises the babies make when they are happy in your arms or in a bathtub. And I love how at work I am inspired by all the people and stories around me. (Low key hate myself for not realizing all of this sooner though... could’ve saved some $$$).

5. I traveled to Australia ... an unexpected but much needed trip I decided to tag along with my parents and Grandma (and a few others), who had been planning it for awhile. I hadn’t traveled anywhere new in awhile and Australia was beyond my wildest dreams. In total in the whole week (9 days?) I was there I ate 5 meals and averaged 3 hours of sleep a night. Was it healthy though? Yes, cause I learned about a whole new culture and saw spectacular views of a lifetime.

6. I wrote a song ... and it was SO. MUCH. FUN. I took this analogy that I had been thinking of for so long and just put it into words. It honestly came to me when I was at the casino on the cruise and looked over at the LOML and suddenly I spilled feelings that I had been hiding for a long time onto a page and added a melody that reminded me of the moment and the feelings... and I showed it to a few people who said it sounded like my idol, #TaylorSwift. AHHH!

7. And then another one ... came to fruition. Suddenly I had two songs and a whole new hobby I enjoyed that allows me to put beautiful, heartbreaking, magical, angry moments into frames filled with words.

8. I cleaned this guy’s house ... and thought maybe for one second he’d maybe just maaayyyybeeee like me back. A part of me also did it for closure, which I got by leaving a 2 paged letter on how I felt about him and how I finally realized I had to let go, because as much as I loved him he would never see me that way...ever. Even after everything we had put each other through. And in case you were wondering, by clean, I mean I spent 4+ hours on all fours wiping up vomit and beer off the floor and washing his dishes because why stop with the floor, right?

9. Made a couple new friends ... E.C & C.J you guys know who you are. Thank you for being the only two people who understand me and being up for drinking a margarita with me any time, any day. #PrayForOurLivers But also, I love our friendship and how I know I always have my back no matter what.

10. Cut off some “friends” ... which was a long time coming. I hurt. Especially the moment that I realized I was depending on people who were no longer there. Who only needed me when they needed me and would tell me I owed them or they owed me. That’s just not what friendship is and not the kind of relationships I want in life. I don’t want to wake up wondering if I was used by someone I care for and wondering why we only hang out once in a blue moon when convenient for them.

11. Hosted 5 girls from Spain ... who I bonded with and learned a lot from in regards to our nursing educations. We went to DC and the beach and there was one awesome night of drunken craziness that brought back memories of when I was in Spain. #TQESPAÑA I also learned to step out of my comfort zone and make new friends even if I might not feel comfortable right away because they seem 3387420974923 times cooler. But the truth is.. (and I think I need to reread this line over and over on the bad days).... people will accept you for your generosity and hospitality. Your looks and how “cool” you are don’t matter on a large scale. It’s how you are willing to go out for people even if you don’t know them that really sticks out and makes you friend and human material. And who knows, you might even make new friends in new places.

12. Went on a Spontaneous Busch Gardens Trip ... screamed. and shout(ed). and let it all out. It was a much needed time and a crazy ass trip. We got to ride The Gryffin, aka MY FAVORITE RIDE EVER, 5 times before we left the park. And even with the rain, we still had an amazing time together. Big lesson here? You have to make the best of every moment and create your own sunshine. You deserve it.

13. Took a 2 hour break at work ... I NEVER take breaks. And if I do it is maybe 30 minutes total in my 12 hour day. It is something I get yelled at for but I can’t sit around knowing people need help. But one day, E and I got lunch cause we were both working and then celebrated with milkshakes later in the afternoon, totaling to 2 hours of recovered time from the year and a half I have not been taking breaks. Regrets? None. My body and mind needed it so very much.

14. Had one awesome night playing basketball ... gosh I don’t even remember how it happened but I remember having the respect of every guy in the room. Being the only girl that plays with them can suck, especially cause testosterone runs high and boys can be rude and such ball hoggers. What’s so big about winning? NOTHING. But I definitely won that night and showed ‘em I’m just as capable if not more. *cue the song “Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better”*

15. Completed my fourth Spartan Race ... the BEAST, which sucked due to the cold. (Thanks, Winter). But it was so so so so AWESOME seeing what I had been capable of accomplishing. of what my body is able to do. Even more so it was just all such a fun experience and the first time I set my mind to something and just committed and stuck it out, even though my body would ache and it was tiring driving a whole day in the car to get to places, sleep 2 hours, and race.

16. Told what I thought was a white lie ... but even white lies can turn a rainbow dark. I felt that I was doing the right thing, and later learned how wrong I was. Especially as time passed on and I kept up with the lie. The truth can be a very scary thing to admit to, but it’s important that you tell it because it sets you free. Even if it is the biggest mistake of your life and you know that once you say it aloud it makes it will make a deafening mark on your life, you have to. There just isn’t a way around it.

17. Finished an essay months before it was due ... I’ve never been a procrastinator and I am so thankful for it. But also for those who are... let me just say... going into a semester knowing you’ve finished the biggest project that is going to be assigned = BEST. FEELING. IN. THE. WORLD. Right next to, Nick Jonas’s soft ass hands.

18. Learned how to play the guitar ... which made songwriting possible. I always wanted to learn it because I love hearing acoustic versions of songs and also Taylor Swift. It’s amazing what you can accomplish with the help of youtube, 4 chords, and hella determination.

19. Finally realized that people aren’t capable of change ... and it’s ok. Sometimes we don’t need people to change who they are, we have to change ourselves and our perspectives. The world isn’t black and white. We all have the ability to see it however we want to. But most importantly, when we do decide to make a change, we need to make sure we’re doing it all for the right reasons. We shouldn’t do it for someone to want us. We shouldn’t do it because we saw someone else do it. We do it because it’s the right thing for us ... and stick to it because one change can make a hell of a difference.

20. Finished 6 ice cream bars in one sitting ... and then went to cycle bar. 0/10 recommend.

21. Stopped responding right away ... because NO ONE should ever spend every single second of their life glued to a small screen. There is so much life around us and it’s become such a bad habit for us to forget that and to lose ourselves in social media.

22. Started Travel Pig’s instagram ... @itstravelpig for those who want to add her. (YES, MY FRIENDS, I’VE DECIDED IT IS A HER/SHE/GIRL.) I thought it could build some cultural awareness or atleast be a platform to share cool story about new places. But i’ve been slacking on it... oops. But traveling and learning about new cultures have been a huge part of my growing up and I wanted to share it and try to help people realize that even with all the differences in skin tone we’re all just amazing human beings capable of so much beauty.

23. Blew out the candles on my melting cake ... without making a wish. It was there, in that moment, that I realized I am truly happy again. I have found a good group of people to surround myself with, passion, a new hobby, but most importantly MYSELF. I don’t think it all would have been possible without all the hurt and confusion that I have felt in the past two years, so I’m thankful that people took me for granted and left me out on the side of the street. But...

a very important honorable mention is needed now. I have to say, I wouldn’t be this type of happy if it were not for a special someone, who has stayed by my side through it all. Even in the worst times, you stayed and held onto me, making sure I knew I still had a home even though I was wandering around...lost. I love you. You know who you are.

Those who were there in the passing, those who got away, thank you for teaching me to appreciate life and the moments. Those who left without a backwards glance, you all will never be forgotten and will instead serve as gentle reminders that I am better because of them. stronger too. Those who stayed, well, let me just say, I can’t wait to see what 24 has in store.

Cheers to one hell of a ride and the start of 24.

#TaylorSwift JonasBrothers Lover HappinessBegins ThankYou

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swooperjb · 5 years

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Entry 1

Week one Starting out

Within week one I have learnt about the expectations that are required within the course to succeed and do the best possible job such as participating, attending class and the language that is to be used to name a few expectations. Also within week one we explored the subject guide that provided the context as to what we will be doing throughout the semester such as expected time outside of class that the subject should be given which is 144 hours. The assessments that we will be doing throughout the semester was also explored as to what the assessments involve and the timeframes that are given to complete them. Through this year, I intend to start assignments when I get them instead of leaving them until last minute which I have done in the past. This will allow me to finish the assignments earlier, which gives me time to look back at them if I have to change them in any way. Also looked over was procrastination which was looked at watching a ted talk describing how procrastinators “ hold things off till last minute making way for the panic monster” displaying the negative effect of procrastination and to spread work out evenly (TED 2016).

Entry 2

Week three Teamwork

The group assessment that was done in week three started off well with all group members getting designated roles to complete. Then just before we were going to put the assignment together one of the group members pulled out of the course and didn’t give any of their work to us leaving us having to leave their part of the assignment out. I was satisfied with the part the I completed as I finished a few days before it was due allowing me to edit my part of the assignment to improve it. My other team mate had finished their part of the assignment and put it all together giving us our power point which was very well done I believe. Both of us worked well together having everything ready on the day to present as both of our work was well done as seen by figure 1. Our feedback from classmates was that we did a good job of our presentation, and that they could not tell that there was information missing from our other team member as the presentation flowed well. All up I think the assessment went well and that the team got on well and things happened easily considering that some of the work was not there.

Figure 1- Team work survey from assessment 2.

Entry 3

Week five Self-Management: Motivation and resilience

Throughout the first five weeks of the course I have balanced my studies with my external interests, by getting my work started when it is handed to me and doing it in the free time that I have. This has allowed me to usually be able to get to external activities such as footy training, as I don’t miss out on this activity due to course work. Therefore, allowing me to stay connected with my other interests and not having to give things up. The ways in which I have remained motivated to do the course when there is a lot of assignments due, is the fact that I think about the end goal and what I may be able to achieve by completing the course such as my future career. The strategies that I use for the course is being organised and keeping up to date with everything so nothing is all of a sudden, a surprise when its due soon. Some skills that I may require further in the course is public speaking skills as there are continually going to be assignments where I have to present.. I have looked over different public speaking tips with tips such as “create the framework for your speech” to really get your material in an effective way to maintain audience’s attention (Harvard n.d.).

Entry 4

Week 7 Understanding and utilising feedback

With the recent assessment two in which my group focused on the basketball brawl in the Philippines against Australia we had to write a reflection. Within the reflection where we had to focus on points such as how our group went, what we could of improved, how we prepared and the challenges that we faced, this was one of our first written assessment. Provided from Sharyn was feedback on the assessment as to how we could of improved in our reflection writing. Within figure 2 displayed is some of the feedback that was provided displaying how my sentences are to long. These sentences being too long can cause confusion with too many ideas so I was asked to keep it simple with one idea. This feedback has helped me within other assessments with my writing and also my structure. As when writing know I am more conscious as to how long my sentences are and if they are simple or not. So overall this feedback has helped me out with my writing across all subjects. And therefore can in turn lead to better marks within upcoming assessment down the track.

Figure 2- Assessment 2 reflection feedback.

Entry 5

Week 9 Developing effective communication skills

Recently I have used written communication within the subject the media industry. This was for assessment two which focused on how the media industry provides many forms and ways to cater for all audiences. I believe that this essay was not as effective as it could have been in getting the point across that the media are able to cover all audiences likes as there are thousands of journalists across the country. So therefore I believe the original purpose was somewhat achieved as conveyed throughout the essay. Also other evidence that displays that the way in which the essay was presented could have been improved is through the lectures feedback. As displayed in figure 3 it shows that throughout the essay my opinion was used quit a bit instead of using references. This is something easy to fix as it is one of the first few essays done in the course and I now know how to better right an essay within the course. I do believe that this was the most effective method of communication that could have been used. The essay just had to be improved to get the whole point across with using more references throughout and not my opinion.

Figure 3- Assessment 2 feedback The Media Industry.

Entry 6

Week 11 Managing Assessments

So far within the essay writing task I have got all the points that are required for the essay and have put them in a logical order to make the essay flow well. I’ve also gone through websites and academic journals to get a better insight about what my topic involves to have a better essay. Within some of my other assessments my referencing hasn’t been the best as I have not been accurate with the Holmesglen Harvard style referencing. Due to this I am going to pay extra attention to getting the referencing correct to get the marks required in this area of the rubric. Also the other part that I need to improve is the fluency of my writing and the length of sentences. As sometimes I can have very long sentences trying to get too many points in at once. These long sentences can cause confusion so I will try and avoid this in the essay. I’m feeling good about this essay as I have got everything sorted and in order of what I have to do. So therefore I believe I will be able to do a good job of the essay.

Entry 7

Week 13 Future Strategies

Knowledge/skills

Within the first semester I have learnt a lot about the expectations that are required in this course to achieve high results now and in to the future. I have learnt and developed skills such as the way in which to correctly write an essay at this level as I did not exactly know how to do this early on. As the semester has gone on I have improved my writing style making it more clear and fluent to read. Also things such as referencing I have developed my skills is as it was the first time I have ever done referencing. At the start of the semester my referencing was not great with a lot of mistakes. I have then been taught how to reference which has seen its significant improvement from my first assessment to where I am at now. With lectures saying that my referencing had to improve I have worked on it to where I believe it is a lot better where it is at now. Other skills that I have gained is my presenting skills which also lacked due to a lack of previous presenting. My last presentation of the semester compared to my first has seen significant improvement with the strategies that I have used to improve my presenting.

Attitudes/behaviours

At the start of the semester there was not many assignments at once which allowed me to keep on top of everything. But as the semester progressed there has been significantly more assessments with one on top of the other. With four assessments due in one week it crept up on me leaving some assessments a bit more rushed then I would have liked. But this allows me to improve for further on in to the course as I have got some experience now to what the course involves.

References

Harvard n.d., 10 tips for improving your public speaking skills, viewed 31 May 2019,

https://www.extension.harvard.edu/professional-development/blog/10-tips-improving-your-public-speaking-skills

Inside the mind of a master procrastinator | Tim Urban 2016, online video 6 April, created by TED, viewed 31 May 2019,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arj7oStGLkU

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thechroniclesofwriting · 5 years

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Right

I have things to say about the Winchesters being slightly terrifying. Y’all ready for an entire essay? Strap in kiddies, I’m procrastinating a thesis and slightly tipsy.

Firstly. Even in height, the Winchesters exceed normality. I want you to consider how high the average interior doorway is. Seriously, go look at your nearest doorway. Pretty high, right? Google tells me it’s 6″6. Dean stands at 6″1, while Sam is 6″3. So, Sam is less than an iPhone away from hitting his head on the top of your average doorway. And unlike NBL, AFL, whatever you national sport acronym is, players, they aren’t just tall. No. Both men are made of muscle.

For reference, a normal man, no, a skinny teenager, could incapacitate me; female, 5″2, 120 pounds. My 5″11, 21 y-o brother can nullify my most persistent attack in about point two of a second, and continue a discussion at the same time. Imagine what a Winchester could do.

Having said that, one of the Australian Jiu jitsu champions is a dude who spent most of his life shorter than me; I should know, I went to both primary and high school with him. Watching him incapacitate opponents several times his size is a work of art. (Do not tell him I said that). Now imagine that same training in a man double his size. In fact, in two men, trained from a very young age.

Secondly, Sam and Dean fight for a living, where the living is literally ‘living or dying’. If they lose, they die. Violently and painfully. I don’t know about you, but I’d have to be pretty fucking confident that I was going to win a fight if I was going to put my life on the line. So to Hunt, per se, as a living, you are a) very physically strong and b) confident as fuck.

Confidence is often touted as an attractive quality. Which it is, and Dean and Sam are both incredibly attractive (what nothing). But imagine that confidence being lethal. I don’t know about you, but I generally find lethal intent a little terrifying. Just saying. SO you have these two, very tall men, who work in a unit, who are very well trained, walk a diner, with the soul purpose of finding someone, and killing them. So you have these men who will use everything from charm to straight up, Geneva Convention banned torture, to get their information. Seriously, they break all of the agreements of the United Nations Convention against Torture and Other Cruel, Inhuman or Degrading Treatment or Punishment (UNCAT).

Thirdly. Vampires, ghosts, shapeshifters, werewolves and demons. Things of myth and legend. The questions that the Winchesters have to ask to determine whether their case is supernatural or just humans-murdering-each-other are mad. I don’t know about you, but if a dude ask me if I felt ‘cold patches’ in a room, I would straight up tell them ‘yeah around you’ and leave. Who is interested in answering those questions, FBI or not? Guys c’mon. I know it varies from person to person, but how difficult is it to convince someone of a mystical force? And how many people would thoroughly believe that said force might be benevolent? How many would make it God and how many would make it science? And, how many would make it a mental institution? So here we have two grown, confident. trained and intimidating men spouting mystical crap while running around in a Chevvy full of guns? Idk about you, but in this situation, I’d probably favour Chuck’s response.

Fourthly, we are currently in our 14th season. Now, some say we’re beating a dead horse. I say, that’s at least 14 YEARS of Sam and Dean being well renowned, death defying, universe saving, legendary hunters. They show up, other hunters are surprised, they have things to say. In their field, they are essentially Bill Gates (okay no but you get the point). Now to be that hunter, to be that good, you have to spend a good portion of time training. Their Dad raised them in this life, albeit abusively. But do you remember Samuel’s little test for Dean in season 5? ‘Do you kill a Vamp with a wooden or silver stake?’ HA. When was the last time Vamps were the real problem in a SPN episode? I’d imagine that the Winchesters are the cautionary tale that monsters tell their kids. To plagiarise John Wick - he’s not boogey man. He’s the one you send to kill the boogey man. They’re the shadows behind the curtain, the monsters in the closet. Their body count is higher than they are. If the Winchesters arrive, you know it’s universe threatening.

Fifthly, not only are they renowned and feared hunters who have travelled through time, space, heaven, hell, probably Tartarus and Jahannam, they are also privvy to information that was not widely known to most hunters. Remember that Mary, in 1978, didn’t really know what Angels were? She was 23 and had been raised by a feared hunter. These two have fought against Lucifer, God, God’s weird sister, etc etc. They’re approaching 40 and really very little fazes either of them. You could stab a Winchester and they’d be like ‘good shot can you call Rowenna’. Most of their big bad’s? They befriended later. ‘Oh yeah Crowley we kept you prisoner for a bit but no welcome bring your mom, we’ll help you’. So now we have upbringing, physical strength, training, confidence (and a damn good track record of, y’know, not dying/coming back to life).

SO FINALLY lets talk genetics. On one side, we have hunters, and the other, the Men of Letters. So overall, two fairly ferocious families. But Mary kills me every time, mostly because of the excellent casting of young Mary. She is so, so Dean. The first time she meets Dean, she confronts him. She’s maybe 19, while Dean at the time would have been approximately 30. I’m 23, and I run from 16 year olds. But she confronts him, and matches him blow for blow. THEN LATER in 78 (so she’s my age, and I’m still fleeing from high school boys) fights an ANGEL and mostly, bests her.

So we’ve got Mary, the born and bred hunter. But then we have John, Pretty, naive John, who is thoroughly offended that he’s treated as useless, which frankly tells us a lot about him. Where Sam and Dean try to protect their naive father of the horrors of the life that befell them (by his hands), John is forceful in proving his worth. He won’t shy from protecting Mary, and you can see how that might ferment into revenge. That sheer determination; it’s so Sam. You can argue with me, but as a law student, I can tell you that nothing but sheer, cold, logic, like the kind we see in John in 5x13 gets you into Stanford Law. Maybe that’s why he and John clashed so much, and why Sam was so compassionate to Henry; maybe that’s why Dean tolerated his dad more than Sam did. Sam did have a mom, and it was Dean. Because Mary is so upset, so affected by her family, and would’ve protected them at any cost. Like Dean does. (Also I like to imagine Dean being like Samuel, if and when he has a child.). Nature, per se, has given them all the tools to become thoroughly terrifying human beings.

So we have training, confidence, knowledge, experience and genetics. Ladies and gentlemen, I presently to you my thesis on why Sam and Dean Winchester are not people you ever want to encounter.

#supernatural #spn #dean winchester #sam winchester

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