#this is not even that good lol but it could be worse

[rogersideup]

｡°✩ ♊︎ The Gemini♊︎ ✩ °｡

Chapter 10

Star Crossed Lover

Series Masterlist

Previous Part: True Romantic Next Part: Promotion

Word Count: 10,607 (I am SO sorry lol)

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of violence, blood, and injury. Allusions and discussion of suicide attempts. Please proceed with caution and and good judgment for your own personal mental health 💞

The drive to your team welcoming at the winery made 45 minutes of highway feel simultaneously far too long yet excruciatingly short.

After what happened in the corridor, you really didn't have much to say. The only words really spoken between you and Steve was you thanking him for getting the car door for you, then him insisting that you played your music.

After a few minutes on the road, Steve stole a few quick glances at you to try and gauge how you were really feeling, but your head was leaned all the way back against the headrest, and your eyes were always either closed or staring absentmindedly on the scenery around you.

He took no offense, in fact, he was glad that you were calm at the very least. Deep down he knew you were always feeling at least a little worse- if not a lot worse than you expressed to anyone. But like always, there was a time and place to address issues. Pulling into a parking spot at the winery and putting his car into park was not the time, nor the place.

Taking a quick peek through his rearview mirror, he could see a few special guests had already arrived, and he could only hope it would help ease the distress you never deserved to have inflicted on you.

Steve turned to you with an empathetic grin tugging at the corners of his lips. "Last chance to run away?"

You turned your head to look at him with a lazy smile, and an unexpected giggle. "I can't run in these shoes."

"If it gets too overwhelming, you know I'll be here. Just tell me, I'll sneak you away for a bit of fresh air." He reminded you.

"You're making me feel like I'm about to be eaten alive" You raised your eyebrow.

Steve shook his head. "No, you're not. I've been on this team for so many years I stopped counting and even I still get overwhelmed by all of them sometimes. Things like this can be a lot even on a perfectly good day."

"I'm guessing I'll relax after a glass of wine or two" You reassured him and yourself. "It'll be like nothing ever happened, nobody even has to know."

That sent red flags raising high in Steve's head. Now he knew for sure you were in worse shape than you were letting on.

"Bug," Steve shot you a serious glare. "You can be sad, it's okay to be sad."

"I'll be sad later." You surrendered. "Right now I'm so happy and honored to be part of such a welcoming and supportive team. We're all going to have a wonderful night, and everything is going to be fine."

"Promise me right now that after this is over you'll cut the bullshit and stop telling me you're fine." Steve held out his pinky to you. All you did was narrow your eyes at him, you knew he could read you like a book far below his intelligence level, and it was equal parts endearing and frustrating. "We both know that's a lie, and we both know there's no reason for you to have to go through any of this alone anymore. We both know this is the beginning of the end of all of your suffering, and should it get worse before it gets better, you have a whole team of people who want to help you and be there for you."

"Fine." With an internal defeat, you wrapped your pinky around his. "I'll be sad later, but only if you get me a glass of wine while I socialize so I don't seem like a bitch for booking it to the bar."

"Great" Steve smiled, shaking your intertwined pinky fingers, locking in the deal. "Pleasure doing business with you."

"This is the worst deal ever." You shook your head with a smile on your face while reaching for the car door handle.

An immediate gasp full of personal offense left Steve faster than you anticipated, and you got ready for the fight you two had nearly every time you got into a car together. "Do not reach for that car door ma'am."

"Twinkles, I have two fully functioning arms and legs. I can open my own car door." You made the same argument you've made a million times before.

"Just because you can, doesn't mean you should." Steve shook his head at you, his face full of disappointment. "Stay right there before I put the child safety lock on the passenger side of the door."

"Logistically, it'll take more time for you to get out, walk around, open my door, wait for me to get out, then close my door than if I were to just get out on my own." You laughed.

“Yeah well, logistically, this reoccurring argument takes a lot of time as well yet you always seem to want to spark it." Steve spoke as he got out of the car, his door closing behind him. Very quickly making his way to you, he opened your door and offered you his arm to help you out. "See, didn't take that long. Look, this is an unpaved parking lot and you're wearing a pretty high heel which means you could've tripped and fallen and broken an ankle, and it would've been all my fault."

"How could you possibly sleep at night?!" You agreed sarcastically as you got out of the car, and he closed the door behind you.

"I never do." Steve noted. "This is why I have insomnia."

"Too many women and too many unpaved parking lots in this world." You agreed, walking with him towards the entrance. "We really need to contact someone about this."

It didn't take long to enter the beautiful outdoor space that was far too big to be reserved just for the team. You immediately felt like you were the main character of a hallmark movie, strings of twinkling lights shined above your head, the grounds were well maintained, full of plants, tables, and even a dreamy gazebo that was also illuminated by strings of lights.

There were candles lit along pathways and atop the standing tables, booths open that served food, and no less than 20 different wine options, and a whole bunch of friendly faces that all started clapping and cheering when you walked in.

Definitely not expecting that much immediate   attention, your cheeks widened into a smile and deepened in color before your hands moved up to hide your face. It only took a few moments before you were brave enough to peak through your fingers to recognize faces you didn't quite expect to be there.

All you expected were the avengers that lived in the compound or near by, but to see faces like Thor, Clint, and even that Spider-Kid who definitely was not 21 and was out passed his bedtime was a pleasant surprise.

Another pleasant surprise was the sweet faces of your mom and dad, sister and brother in law, and a handful of your friends from back home.

Your hands dropped from your face and showed off your full toothy smile and pink cheeks that Steve loved so much it made his heart skip a beat.

It nearly dropped out of his chest and deep into his stomach when you turned to him. "Did you invite them?"

"Of course I did" Steve nodded with a cheeky smile. "I wanted you to feel more comfortable, and you deserve to be celebrated by your family too, not just ours."

Much like earlier in the day when he gave you the suit, your arms flew around him fast and tight. It was shorter this time due to the audience, but Steve still loved it nonetheless. "Thank you so much, you're so sweet."

"You're very welcome" Steve smiled. "I'll go get us some wine like I promised, but I do feel like I need to say hello to your family first considering I've been texting them to arrange this. But I'll be quick!"

"I have so many questions" You raised your eyebrow at him.

"Save them for later!" Steve told you while walking straight towards your parents.

With full trust that nothing chaotic would happen in that interaction, you scanned faces once more and realized Bucky and Nat were missing. You knew why, but it made your happy mood deflate again until Thor was the first of the bunch to walk up and introduce himself.

You made your way through Bruce, Carol, and even said hi to Maria Hill regardless of the fact that you worked with her many times before.

Steve did make it to you with a glass of wine in each of his hands between your interactions with people. "Here you go, Bugs. Not quite sure what this wine is but I told the nice girl at the bar you liked white wine so she poured you her favorite."

"You're the best." Your cheers your glass against his.

"Ugh, I know right?" He agreed sarcastically, drinking down a grin with a sip of red.

Your quick interaction with Steve made your family approach you to celebrate, but he definitely wanted you to have your time alone with them so he slipped away just as fast as he came.

Lots of hugs, lots of chatting, then lots of them pushing you away to go hang out with the Avengers.

Somewhere between Peter Parker and more time with Sam, a quick scan of the crowd had you realizing that now the Avengers were co-mingling with your family and friends. Oh, and Bucky and Natasha finally got there 45 minutes into the actual event.

Lost in conversation with Scott Lang about the most recent episode of that one sitcom he so happened to bring up, a pair of forearms wrapped around you from behind.

You pretty much expected it to be anybody but Natasha, but you were pleasantly surprised that she was already so comfortable with you. "Sorry we're late, but Rogers' mess is cleaned up and you'll never see it again. Also, you look hot in that dress."

There was no chance to thank her or apologize for the mess as she quickly galavanted off into the crowd.

Scott was pulled away from you about 10 minutes later, and your glass became empty of wine. Feeling mildly confident at this point that you had at least introduced yourself and greeted everyone there, you felt comfortable enough to go get a refill on your own.

Another heavy pour and you were back out. Conversation flowed a lot easier than expected between the groups you found yourself in. There was always something to talk about, laughter was a common occurrence, but somehow the mess in the corridor kept seeping into your mind no matter how hard you tried to push it down.

Eventually Bucky found his way to you, and somehow the comfort of one of your best friends helped quiet down all of the unnecessary noise in your brain.

In true Bucky fashion, he approached with plenty of food in hand. Setting a full wood fire pizza on the table, he pushed the whole tray towards you.

"You haven't been eating enough for someone at an event with free food" He noted.

"Hello to you too" You grinned, taking down another big gulp of wine.

"Steve told me you were worried about me." Bucky's face softened.

"I'm always worried about you, that's what friends are for." You agreed with Steve's statement.

"You know what that agent said about me tonight is nothing but water off a ducks back." He reassured you. "But what he said about you is what bothered me. That is what I take personally, and that's what I can't let anyone get away with."

You sighed. "What did you do, Buck?"

"Nat fired him, we both got him on some gnarly lists to ensure he's going to have a hard time finding another job." He explained. "I think Steve did enough damage that the dumbass will probably never reproduce, which is probably a blessing to the next generation. We didn't help him up though, he can figure that out himself."

"Don't you think that's a bit harsh?"

"If it was up to me. I wouldn't have left it at just his balls, but I digress" Bucky shrugged. "I'm really happy you're back, Buggy. I've been smiling all day knowing you're here."

"Well for what's it's worth, I'm sorry people have been saying rude things about you because of me, and I'm happy to be here to hopefully get back on the right foot. I missed you and Steve a lot these past couple of months."

"It's not your fault, so I'm not accepting that apology." Bucky denied. "But I will accept a hug because I missed you too."

"Tough crowd." You grinned before wrapping your arms around him and leaving them there for a while.

Then, he started whispering in your ear. "This was a trap I just wanted to gossip in peace"

You let out an uncontrollable laugh, starting to feel the effects the wine had on you. "What's up? What's the gossip?" You tried to whisper back but it was a little hard to get the words quietly past your smile.

"Has Steve kissed you yet?" Bucky asked in a dramatic whisper.

“No, I don't think he ever will." You denied. "But I just got back last night, give him some grace."

"I don't think he will either. He's really scared of you." He agreed with you. "Do you need me to yell at him for that? Or I can just kind've shove your faces together when I find the opportunity?"

He pulled another laugh from you. "No, it's okay. He's scared, he needs to go at his own pace."

"Have you admitted to yourself that you like him yet?"

"Unfortunately you knew that before I did, but yes, and I told him that too."

"Good, good." Bucky started to pull away from the hug, but your wrapped your arms tighter around him.

"Tell me about you and Nat now" You trapped him.

"Well I'm not a scaredy cat like Steve is so... Girlfriend."

You gasped with a smile and pulled back to observe his face. But it was obvious he wasn't lying to you, so you lit up once more. "I'm so happy for you!"

Raising your hand up for a high five, Bucky hit his metal palm against your hand.

From across the winery and under the gazebo, Steve watched this whole interaction between you and Bucky. He was pleasantly surprised when jealousy never rushed through his veins watching the two of you hug.

Thats when Steve realized how secure he felt with you now. He understood now more than ever that you and Bucky were purely platonic, and it was evident in the way you two looked at and touched each other. In fact, he even felt a sense of warmth and happiness watching you two have a secretive conversation that wasn't so slick. Maybe it would've been a little more discreet had you been a bit more sober, but he found it endearing nonetheless. He found himself feeling hopeful that soon enough the three of you really could smooth over the damage and go back to hanging out together, a notion that once felt impossible.

He was even happier when he saw the both of you take a slice of pizza, cheers, then eat together.

After that, he stopped watching. He was so content knowing that Bucky was keeping an eye on you. Maybe that's where he overestimated his false sense of security, because along with the pizza, Bucky brought you another glass of wine which only meant you were feeling sillier and more socially confident by the second.

At some point Steve fell deep into conversation with your dad, they were getting along so well, in fact, he hadn't even noticed that he spent about a whole hour and a half alone under the fairy light illuminated gazebo with him. They also didn't notice that you were getting along with the team so well it's like you were always part of the little family to begin with.

He didn't catch you and your sister flipping each other off from across the venue as often as you could, he didn't see the way you and Peter made a secret handshake, or even when you exchanged phone numbers with Bruce. He missed Sam making you laugh so hard you nearly peed your pants, then you, Nat, and Wanda disappearing to the bathroom for a solid ten minutes then coming back with your lipstick magically perfect again.

He also missed your fourth glass of wine.

But that was pretty obvious when you walked out of the bathroom and into the social event, scanning the intimate crowd to try and spot anyone to engage in conversation.

Thats when you noticed your mom batting her eyelashes and giggling in a one on one conversation with Tony, while your dad was batting his eyelashes and giggling under the gazebo with Steve.

A bit wobbly on your feet, you walked over to them and held onto the wooden entrance as you stepped up. Both of their attention was drawn to you from their spot on a bench.

You squinted your eyes at your dad. "Hello, Father."

"Daughter" He raised an eyebrow at you.

Steve didn't know where this interaction was about to go, so he observed carefully. 

"Steve, is this strange man bothering you?" You asked him.

Steve laughed as your dad reached over to you and flicked the side of your head, you remained unfazed. "Not in the slightest."

"She's drunk" Your dad told Steve while covering your ears.

"I'm not drunk, I'm silly and perhaps a bit goofy, but I am not drunk." You grabbed your dad's wrists and pulled his hands off your ears. "My sobriety should be the least of your concerns at the moment."

"Why is that?" Your dad asked.

"Tony Stark is flirting with your wife." You pointed to your mom and Tony.

Steve followed your pointed finger and saw that you were actually right, and that made him laugh. "That's really concerning."

Your dad sighed. "So what? I have to fight Iron Man now? You chose to be a superhero and now I have to fight Iron Man for your own Mother?"

"Get used to it." You stuck your tongue out at him.

He stuck his tongue out right back at you before turning to Steve. "Please excuse me, I need to rescue my wife."

"By all means" Steve agreed.

When your dad walked off and you were alone with Steve, you sat down right next to him and pulled his arm around your shoulders before you closed your eyes and rested your head on him.

You didn't see his smile as he pulled you as close as he could and rubbed the top of your arm. "How are you doing?"

"Cold, tired, feet hurt." You mumbled. "Drunk"

"I thought you said you weren't drunk?" Steve quipped happily.

“Well, you're not my dad so you get to know the truth." You snuggled into him. "More truth, you smell really nice, and I just need to sit here for a little while."

A giggle escaped Steve from your confessions. "Are you having fun?"

"More fun than I thought" You nodded. "I'm so warm and fuzzy inside. It's been so long since I've felt happy like this."

That wiped the smile clean off of Steve's face. "I'm so happy that you're happy. It'll keep getting better, I'll make sure of it."

"I wish it could just be like this all the time." The feelings you never talk about spilling out of your mouth. "Life could be so good, and I really love it sometimes. I just don't know how to not take what other people do to me personally. You and Bucky are so good at that."

"You're good at everything you do, and life is about to get so much better for you, sweet girl. I promise."

"I'm trying really hard to believe you." You smiled. "I probably sound sad, but I'm happy right now. 'M always happy when I'm with you."

"You can stay with me however long you want, I'm happy with you too." He squeezed your shoulder.

"How did you guys plan such an elaborate event when nobody even knew if I would agree to be an avenger or if I would even be back at the compound today?" You asked.

"We used magic and our intuition" He said with a smile.

"You are so magical" Your alcohol influenced mind marveled. "And who in my family have you been communicating with because that's so magical"

"Your sister and your mom" Steve giggled at your question. "Your family is very nice and really fun to be around."

"Did my dad tell you embarrassing stories about me?"

"Surprisingly, no he didn't."

"Good, good. Let's keep it that way."

Closing your eyes, you let the wine and Steve's body heat relax all your muscles and wash the tension away. Unsure of how long you had actually been there, there was a point in which you could feel Steve shift to look at an approaching person.

An uncontrollable laugh escaped your intoxicated mind as whoever Steve was looking at sat on the other side of you and snuggled into your body the same way you were snuggled up to Steve, but for some reason you still didn't want to open your eyes.

"Wow, this is lovely" The voice said. It sounded like Sam, but you couldn't be too sure.

"Hey, I want in on this too" Sounded loudly from far away. Footsteps came running, and Maria plopped onto Sam's lap sideways. She kicked her legs over your and Steve's laps.

Slowly but surely, more Avengers, family and friends ended up under the gazebo with you and Steve. The cuddle pile grew with Scott and Nat, and lasted longer than it probably should've.

You were fed enough food by pretty much everyone while you all drunkenly told stories and laughed so hard that your stomach hurt that you eventually sobered up.

Once you were sober again, you realized just how fast time had flown by and were sad to hug your parents goodbye. You're pretty sure your mom hugged and your dad fist-bumped nearly every single person at the event, but that was neither here nor there.

Eventually everyone said goodbye, and by the time you got back into Steve's car it was already almost midnight. And by the time you got home and into Steve's bed, all of your energy was more than depleted. Social battery was in the negative, but you felt like you had been plugged into a high speed charger when he got under the covers next to you.

"How are you feeling?" That seemed to be everyone's favorite question to ask you.

"I kind've feel like you right now" With your eyes closed, your laid on your back with one arm above your head and the other resting over your hoodie on top of your belly.

Steve giggled "what is that supposed to mean?"

"I feel like I'm going to throw up."

"Any particular reason why?"

"I ate too much, drank too much wine. I'm bloated but happy so it's a small price to pay." You explained.

"Well if you're going to throw up, aim in that direction" Steve smiled and pointed in the opposite direction of himself. "Are you still drunk? Do you need some water?"

"No I'm not, I'm okay" Your smile barely ghosted your lips. "Just need some sleep."

Steve reached over and pulled some blankets over your frame before poking your cheek. "Remember what you promised me earlier?"

Your eyes opened to look at him. "I feel better, really. I do."

Steve sighed. "You don't even want to talk about it?"

"What is there to say?" You questioned. "All the same shit, different day. There's nothing I can do about that anymore."

"When this all first started, you were getting sent to my office nearly every day for fighting back, but tonight you kind've froze up. Why?"

"I wasn't expecting anyone to do that to me when I was with you." You answered. "But it's done now, it's fine."

"We both know it's not done" Steve's face softened. "And avoiding it doesn't make it go away."

"Would you like me to rewind time and kick him in the balls instead?"

"No, I just want you to know you can talk to me." Steve emphasized.

"I'm pissed off." You admitted. "I'm always in a state of being angry that this is the environment that I have to learn to thrive in every day, but I've also reached a state of emotional exhaustion that makes me feel like I have no room left to be even more angry than I already am. I've hit max capacity, so I'm choosing to stay as calm as I can because out of all the kicks and punches I've thrown, none of them have worked before. I have no reason to believe it'll work now."

“It's not fair." Steve huffed like kid.

"It never has been." You agreed with a shrug. "But you don't need to hold onto that anger for me. I'm trying to let go of it and move on."

"I'll let go of my anger in the form of making change." Steve told you, now feeling brave enough to pull you close to him.

You snuggled up close, your head on his bicep and your arm holding him gently. "I'm an avenger now. That's all the change I know how to make at the moment."

"I'm so proud of you" he practically whispered. "But I've never met anyone like you before."

"You really need to work on providing context before sentences that might hurt my feelings"

Steve chuckled at your bluntness. "You're telling me that you're happy, but you're also telling me that you're sad. Both of those statements feel genuine, so I don't really know where your mind is."

"Well then imagine how complex and confusing it is to be me" You emphasized. "Never in my whole life have I felt more alone while also feeling more loved than ever. I'm happy and sad, I just accomplished something most people never will by becoming an avenger yet I've also never felt more like a loser. This is the first time I've ever been relentlessly bullied but it's also the first time I've ever been a superhero so I guess the juxtaposition of my emotions is just turning my brain into scrambled eggs."

"Have you tried compartmentalization?" Steve offered with a grain of salt.

"I tried that once, I think I created too many emotional categories and got overwhelmed." You smiled. "But I'm a Gemini, so these complexities have been written in the stars for me since the moment I was brought onto the earth. I think I was born for the very purpose of the universe testing to see if overwhelming contradictory emotions could physically kill a human being."

"One of my greater purposes in life is to protect people against the things that could kill them, so you're in good hands right now." Steve slowly rubbed your back. "Overwhelm will not be your cause of death. Actually, nothing will be. I'm trying to convince Banner to make clones of us to be kept in cryofreeze that way when we die of old age, new versions of us can just be thawed out so we can be best friends forever."

"Spoken like a true cancer" You laughed, patting his chest. "Did I uphold my end of the promise?"

"We can call it even, but I'll always be concerned"

"Even Stevens!" You sleepily enthused.

"Are you rhyming or was that a reference to something?" You could hear his amusement.

"Both, you're a little too old to understand that one."

"That's really rude" Steve faked offense.

"Thanks for coming to my rescue, Twinkles. I know you think you didn't do much, but it means a lot to me when I know I have someone on my team."

"I'll always be on your team, you've always been worth the fight." Steve reminded you.

Those words comforted you enough to ignore your very full stomach and fall into a deep sleep in the hold of your favorite soldier's big protective arms. Unfortunately the universe loved to hate you, because you only got your share of the superhero until about 4am when his phone started ringing effectively waking both of you up.

A few curse words slipped out of his mouth in complaint before he reached for his phone and answered it. You didn't pay much attention to the phone call itself, but you did find it within your lack of  consciousness to move nearly your entire body onto his in attempt to keep him forever. Snuggling into him belly to belly, his hand found the back of your head and played with your hair as you slipped in and out of sleep.

By the time the phone call ended, you had effectively caged him between the mattress and your body. Realizing what you had done, Steve's cheeks burned as he let out a sigh.

"You can't go." You sleepily mumbled.

"You and I both know I don't really have any say in that." Steve reminded you apologetically.

"Says who? We all have free will."

"Unfortunately, the president of the United States. Apparently he requested to meet me for an urgent conversation about something that's happening somewhere." Steve explained.

"Damnit." You yawned. "I think the president has me beat in importance."

"I think the two of you are pretty equal in importance." Steve pondered. "The only difference is that people might die if I don't get out of bed."

"My soul will die if you get up, but it's fine, I understand." You joked dramatically.

"You're making it very hard for me" Steve complained, wrapping his arms around your back and squeezing you gently.

"If you're hard that's all the more reason to stay in bed." You joked, knowing damn well Steve wouldn't take a naughty joke like that very well.

And you were right, because the gasp that left his mouth was immediate and visceral. You didn't need to look at his face to know his cheeks were flushed pink and red hot. Your laugh was also pretty immediate and visceral as he used his body to flip you over onto the bed and propped himself up on his arm to lean over you. Pointing a finger at you like a dog, he had one word to say. "Bad!"

You laughed even harder as he shook his head at you. "I'm going to get up and get ready to meet the president, you stay here and think about what you just said."

Laying in bed alone, Steve eventually came to say goodbye to you. It was always sad to let each other go, but also an often occurrence. But this time he was hesitant to leave, of course you both knew why. Last night wouldn't be a one time event, but he encouraged you to stay close to Bucky, Nat and Sam as often as you could, and emphasized that there would be no timeline to his departure so he didn't know when he would be back. He also made it clear that should you need to defend yourself, you should do so with no hesitation.

Luckily, all was pretty smooth for a while. Your friendship with Nat bloomed faster than you'd ever expect it would, so for the first week Steve was gone the two of you were practically attached at the hip. Nat and Bucky spent a whole day helping you move from your old apartment up into the Avengers sector. Though it felt a bit pointless moving within the same building, the team felt better about keeping a protective eye on you when you weren't floors away from them. It was a nice change of pace to have a sense of community around you again.

The second week that Steve was gone, you tried to focus on building individual friendships with the team members outside of your little social circle. Your therapist also encouraged you to try and be brave enough to walk through the compound with a confident attitude so nobody would fuck with you, so you tried a few times on your own, a few times were nothing more than anxiety inducing, and a few times got you confronted with hostility which lead to 3 more agents getting fired by Natasha.

By the third week you finally got a phone call from Steve. It was nice to hear his voice and catch up and hear about what he had been up to for all this time, and it was especially nice to hear that he was wrapping up his work and he would be home soon. That same day you got to visit Jane and Luca over lunch at one of your favorite restaurants, then they helped you pick out a few new things for your new apartment.

Most kids acted as if a home store was cruel and unusual, but Luca was very opinionated about rugs and throw pillows. He even convinced you to get a new pair of sneakers at the clothing store he wanted to go to across the street from the compound.

Lots of therapy, lots of solo workouts, lots of team building, you were starting to feel mentally and physically stronger.

Strong enough to keep walking alone, and pushing forward no matter how hard it was.

When Steve landed on the runway after 3 whole weeks and a handful of days of being gone, he was so relieved to be back home. Without even making it off the jet he was already fantasizing about shaving the beard he unintentionally grew after forgetting his razor at home, a long shower and a long nap since it was only early in the afternoon and definitely not bedtime yet.

His fantasies continued as he stepped off the jet and into the building. Now he knew he wanted to see you before he knocked out for that nap he desperately needed. There would be some snacks at some point, and definitely no pants after the got out of the shower.

The sound of his boots on the sleek floor actually brought him joy knowing each step was one closer to you.

Like most fantasies, what he hoped and dreamed of was far from reality. Especially when a loud alarm sounded in the sector of the compound he was headed towards.

Stopping in his tracks and cringing at the sound, he waited for the code and location to be called out before springing into action. It could've been as simple as a knocked over vial in the lab, or complex as an invasion of an enemy. But when the code called out for aggressive physical conflict in the gym, Steve's heart sank and he started running as fast as he could.

He didn't want to believe it was you, but he couldn't be naive either. His racing heart and even faster legs carried him there faster than anyone else could. As he entered the doorway into the compound gym, he could hear the footsteps of a few sets of feet trailing behind him, but waiting for others arrival wouldn't slow him down.

Especially not when he entered the gym and it was completely empty besides two people, his heart sank even further when he recognized it was you, and the number on the back of the uniform of the other person was 212. Harvey.

No less than a billion racing thoughts came sped through Steve's mind, and none of the billion came together to form any good ideas. He swore all he saw was a blinding white and all he heard was his own heart beat in his ears as he sprinted through the equipment to get to where the altercation was happening.

The two of you looked like a cartoon before he went into fully protective mode. As he weaved through punching bags and stair climbers, he couldn't pick out where your body started and Harvey's ended. There might as well have been a big dust cloud around you, with puffs of air pluming out.

The consequences of putting himself in the middle of a fight wasn't even a thought in Steve's mind as he jumped over a treadmill and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind and tried to pull you backwards, far away from Harvey.

Unfortunately, you were a little too preoccupied trying to save your own life to notice the alarm was sounding or that anyone was coming to save you, let alone Steve who you didn't even know was home yet. Assuming it was another attacker, one of Harvey's buddies helping him take you down, you forcefully thrashed and kicked yourself out of the Steve's grip. Adrenaline clouded your judgement, flight was nowhere to be seen as fight took over your every thought, you turned around and swung your fist right at him to earn yourself more time to knock Harvey down. You know you made pretty harsh contact considering there was a shooting pain buzzing through your knuckles, but at this point there was pain jolting through nearly every part of your body, so this wasn't going to slow you down.

Still not realizing what you had done, you watched Natasha sprint into the room and full body tackle Harvey to the ground, followed by a few other commanding officers, Sam, and Bucky. Trusting their ability to deal with Harvey and not let him touch you again, you turned back around to deal with whoever else was.

Fist balled, ready for a second swing, you looked up at the targets face, and devastation immediately took over the whole of your emotions. Steve blocked your punch and caught your wrist mid swing.

"Hey hey hey, it's me. It's just me" Steve frantically tried to get you to stop.

"Oh my god" You whispered to yourself as you realized you punched Steve right on his cheekbone, hard enough a bruise was already forming.

He watched you come to the realization of what you had done, your wrist was shaking in his hand, even more so as he loosened his grip and gently placed your arm down to your side.

You looked battered and bruised, but when he looked back at Harvey, it was clear that you had won this fight.

Looking at your wide eyes, he could tell you were in shock, and coming down from the copious amount of adrenaline coursing through your veins. He knew all too well what that felt like. Guilt, shame, the full effects of pain from the injuries sustained, the tremors and how weak your knees and thighs would get. He's been in your position far too many times before, he knew it was the worst feeling in the world.

Especially when your cheek was oozing blood, your arms were scraped up and bruised. Steve could tell the fight started with an unfair advantage.

Then, tears started pooling in your eyes as you looked at Steve's face and you opened your mouth but no words would come out.

"It's okay." Steve told you, very slowly reaching out to put his hands on your shoulders trying to snap your brain out of fight mode. "You're okay."

A tear fell down your cheek and your eyebrows furrowed before you muttered a quiet. "I'm so sorry."

"You didn't know" Steve shook his head. "You were just trying to protect yourself. You're okay, buggy."

You looked over your shoulder and saw Harvey on the ground. His face was a lot bloodier than yours. With eyes swollen shut and his nose definitely not in its usual form, you felt like a monster.

A sob escaped your throat, and your shaky hand flew up to cover your mouth before your eyes squeezed shut. "What did I do?"

"Everything is going to be fine." Steve reminded you, pulling your attention back to him.

His bruised face only made your sobs escape faster and your heart pound even faster. "I'm so sorry, Steve, I-I didn't mean to. I didn't know it was you."

"I know you didn't, you didn't even know I was home." Steve reasoned with you. "It's okay, just take some deep breaths for me."

You shook your head, still panting from the physical exertion. "I can't."

"You can't?" He questioned.

"I have to go." You took a big step backwards, Steve's arms fell back to his sides.

More concern than Steve ever thought was humanly possible took over his mind. "Where do you need to go?"

"I don't know." You sobbed. "I just need to go. I'm sorry"

Another two scared steps backwards, then you bolted out of the gym. Steve started making strides towards you, fully prepared to follow you but Sam approached him and stuck his arm out.

"You have to let her go on her own." Hand flat to Steve's chest, he stopped him. "She needs time to calm down and come to terms with what just happened. Trust that if she needs something, she will call you."

Steve's shoulders deflated. He wanted to go help, convince you to see a medic and have an emergency meeting with your therapist, but he also knew Sam was probably right.

With a big deep breath, Steve assessed the state of the gym. Realizing one of the treadmills was still on and going, he reached over the machine to stop it. Then a few commands slipped through his mouth while trying to organize his own brain.

He needed the security camera footage of the incident, he needed the alarm to stop, he needed a lab clean up crew to get rid of all the blood on the gym floor, and he needed Harvey handcuffed to the hospital bed he was bound to end up in. He was too tired to do any of that on his own, but luckily others were eager to get this taken care of too.

Just as he was no longer needed, Bucky approached and squeezed his shoulder.

"What's that thing on your face?" Bucky's nose scrunched up.

"She got me on accid-"

"I'm not talking about the bruise. I didn't even know you were capable of growing a beard" Bucky commented.

Narrowing his eyes, Steve glared at Bucky. "I forgot my razor."

"Respectfully," Bucky stated looking him up and down. "You look like shit, Pal."

"Thanks, Buck." Steve sarcastically smiled. He knew he looked disheveled and tired.

"Really, I think 66 more years of sleep would look good on you." He backhandedly tapped Steve's chest. "Go take a nap."

"I don't think I'll be able to sleep after she ran off like that." Steve sighed.

"We'll take care of her." Bucky reassured him. "We can always wake you up if need be, but her and Nat have grown really close. She has a lot of people in her court."

After about 10 more minutes of arguing with Bucky, he decided to just let him win under the conditions that he would keep him updated when he found out any new information.

Steve showered, shaved, and put on sweatpants and a shirt before getting into bed. He didn't want to wear pants, but he did it for your sake, just in case you came to find him. Realizing it had been about an hour since the incident, he tried calling you just to see if you would pick up, but he wasn't shocked when you didn't. So he sent you a text letting you know he was here for you when you were ready, then tried his hardest to get his mind to calm down enough to fall asleep.

It took an unfortunately short amount of time, as the second he laid down sleep hit him harder than your fist against his face, and he knocked out for so long that he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing, and it was now pitched black in his bedroom.

"Hello?" Steve mumbled into his phone.

"Jesus Christ, good morning sleeping beauty." Bucky said.

"Weren't you the one who told me to get some sleep?" Steve poked.

"Not important, glad you're back from the dead. I have some updates for you. Are you awake enough to process the words I'm speaking to you"

“I will be once I'm filled with rage over this situation again. What's up?"

"The security footage was recovered and I finally got to see it. It's enough evidence to land Harvey in jail for assault, so that's what Natasha is currently perusing."

Steve sat up in bed and reached for the lamp on the bedside table, blinking his eyes to adjust as it clicked on. "What happened?"

"She was alone in the gym, running on the treadmill and minding her own business. 212 saw her in there on her own, snuck in through the back door and yanked her off the treadmill. Her foot slipped off the end of the machine so he pushed her forward and scraped her face and arms against the moving belt, which is why she was bleeding. He was screaming some things at her but none of it is very clear. He tried kicking her a few times but she was able to get up and try to push him off of her, he persisted and she got fed up after he managed to get a swing at her collar bone and kicked her chin. She just... started swinging at him and didn't stop until you and Nat got them away from each other." Bucky explained.

"If this video can get him in jail, that would be great. But it can't be used if it's incriminating against her. We can't have that happen." Steve sighed.

"If anything, it's proof of self defense. You know Nat would never let anything bad happen to her. None of us would." Bucky reminded Steve. "It looked really painful on her end though. She ended up going to medical, but they released her a couple hours ago. JARVIS is telling me she's hanging out on the roof."

"Think I should go up there?" Steve asked, swinging his legs over the side of the bed, already knowing the answer.

"Well I don't necessarily think she should be alone for much longer."

"I'll talk to you later then."

The call ended and Steve stood in front of the mirror to fix his hair, while trying his hardest to ignore how tender and swollen his cheek was now. Before making it up to the private roof access, Bucky sent him the video and it took everything out of him to not kill Harvey with his own two hands. But a deep breathing exercise helped him regulate his anger again.

When he got up there and made it to the top, he saw you laying beneath the stars on a blanket with your headphones on, quietly crying to yourself and hoping that the moon understood your pain.

You noticed Steve immediately, and took your headphones off before sitting up as he quietly sat down next you. Trying your hardest to be brave, your lip wobbled trying to contain the new wave of emotion you felt. No words needed to be exchanged as you gently reached up and cupped his bruised cheek into your palm. There was a physical pain blossoming in your chest as he wrapped you up into his arms, but butterflies fluttered in his stomach as you let one of your arms keep him close, and your hand stayed over his cheek.

You cried tucked into his neck for a little while as he rubbed your back and simply let you feel your feelings. After a little while he heard your small broken voice.

"I'm so sorry." You apologized again, bravely pulling away and moving your hand to inspect the damage you did to his face. "Are you okay? Does it hurt?"

"It's okay, Bugs. I'm fine. It was a dumb move on my part to grab you like that, if I was you I would've punched me too." Steve responded sincerely, taking in the burn-like scabs on your face down near your jaw. "Are you okay?"

"Could've been a lot worse." You nodded with a sniffle, really trying to convince yourself that you were okay. "I don't remember what happened, it all happened so fast I can't even recall specifics. I got scared and didn't want to hurt anyone else so I ran. I'm still trying to come down from that."

"I saw footage from the security camera, it wasn't good, Bug." Steve broke the news to you softly. "You did what you needed to do, and it was all within reason. There mere fact that you walked away with a few scrapes and bruises is a miracle."

"Did he sneak up on me?" You asked, Steve simply nodded in return with a sympathetic look on his face. "That's what I thought must've happened, that's also probably why I punched you so hard."

"If you need to see the video to help you process, I'll show it to you. But right now, I think it's best to just try and wind down."

In agreement, you made yourself comfortable next to Steve. You sat sideways nearly on his lap, with your legs thrown over his. His arm pulled you into his torso, and you rested your head onto your shoulder. Steve noticed your tiny winces as you adjusted to the new found pain and soreness in your body, but he tried his best to avoid all the spots he knew were injured.

“You saw a doctor right? Is everything okay?" He questioned, genuinely concerned.

You nodded. "Everything is pretty surface level, but apparently being slammed onto some heady gym equipment can bruise a rib."

"Bruised ribs are so painful" Steve's face scrunched up. "You're one tough cookie."

"I'm sorry this is what you came home to after being away for so long."

Steve was looking at you, admiring the way you looked under the moonlight, yet you couldn't keep your eyes off the stars. "I wish you didn't feel the need to apologize for things that aren't your fault."

"I'm working on that, and I don't anymore for most people. But for you? A million apologies wouldn't be enough. You're too sweet for this kind of nonsense."

"You are too, but out of all people you should know that I understand." Steve stressed. "In a lot of ways, we're very similar, Bug. I know what it feels like to be in the position you're in right now. You don't need to explain anything or apologize to me. I get it."

You tried to understand his words, but you really didn't. For a moment, you almost got upset with him for implying that anyone would treat him the way you've been treated around the compound. Steve was one of the most respected people in the world, you could barely earn the respect of a new hire agent. "I don't see anyone rushing to try and physically harm you for going on a run." You wiped tears from under your eyes.

"No, maybe not here." Steve agreed with you. "But way back when I first got the serum, I struggled really hard to earn respect from anyone around me."

"I have to admit, it's hard to imagine anyone disrespecting you."

Steve grinned and carefully brushed a few stray strands of hair away from your eyes. "I went from a 90 pound asthmatic who didn't have the strength to complete one push up to a human science experiment. I proved myself the very moment after I got the serum and it still wasn't enough for a lot of people. Thats why I was paraded around on that USO tour for so long, nobody thought I could handle fighting a war."

"You looked really cute in those booty shorts" you sniffled.

Steve chuckled at your statement. "Stop making me laugh when I'm trying to teach you a valuable lesson."

"I'd rather jump off this roof than not make you laugh" you smiled despite the contradictory tears.

"The point of this conversation is actually to make sure you don't jump off the roof." Steve informed you.

Your eyes moved from the stars to his eyes, they were both as equally beautiful and bright. "Is that what you're worried about? I would never-"

"Quite honestly, yeah, I am." He cautiously continued with a slight nod. "We see a more on a daily basis than anyone should see in their whole life, that alone is grounds for struggle but when you factor in everything else, I don't think that concern is far off."

Your tears fell faster at his statement. As a sad sob slipped past your throat and your eyes found the sky once more, Steve's heart broke knowing he hit the nail on the head. He also knew you wouldn't open up if you felt defensive about it, so he needed to take the scenic route to get you there.

"What's your favorite part about the stars?" Steve asked. "You seem to love looking at the sky when you're sad."

"Looking for constellations helps me stay calm and get out of my head" You explain with a sniffle. "They're hard to see in the city but it's better here upstate."

Steve looked up. "It's amazing to me that you can find constellations. All I see is each individual star."

You pointed at the brightest light. "That's Saturn, and these stars right below it make up the Aquarius constellation."

"It's crazy that the universe is so vast."

"That's another reason why I like the stars so much. With so much happening out there, it's a good reminder that everything down here is so tiny and insignificant in the grand scheme of the universe. Sometimes that makes me feel like I can keep going strong, like one day none of this will even matter."

"You really believe in astrology? I go back and forth. The stars are so far away, I struggle to understand how they can control so much of who we are." Steve pondered.

"I do believe in it." You nodded. "The moon controls our oceans, the tide is physical proof. Our bodies are made up of 60% water, and all of the other elements we're made up of were formed in the stars over the course of billions of years. It's hard for me to believe they don't have a say in what's going on down here."

"I've never thought of it that way." Steve grinned. "It's really magical when you put it like that."

"Maybe you're made up of more stardust than the average human considering your eyes seem to twinkle like they're already up in space." You noted. "It's magical, but it's also equally devastating to feel like the bad parts of your life are written into the stars."

"We need the not so great stuff to help us understand how amazing the good stuff is. Can't see the stars if the sun is out." For some reason, his perspective brought you comfort. It felt like the hug he kept you wrapped up in. "Maybe that's always why I've thought so highly of you. Despite the darkness you've continued to show excellence, and shine brighter than the rest."

"Then maybe I'm a supernova because sometimes I really do feel like I'm going to explode." You giggled at your own realization.

"Even then you'd still shine a million times brighter than the sun!" Steve enthused, big smile on his face. "But don't explode, black holes are terrifying."

"I won't. That's why I came up here. Avengers only access, don't have to worry about anybody else or the damn sprinklers."

"When I was in the Army, drawing was my version of looking at the stars. It was the only way I could really get my mind to quiet down." Steve explained. "Back then, I was miserable. All the army men hated me, I had recently lost my mom, and I thought I killed Bucky. The war was so horrific I didn't think I'd ever be able to recover from what I had to do or what I had to see, and I felt even worse for the innocent lives taken in the whole ordeal. So, when I knew that I could end it... I did."

"You're a hero because of it." You agreed, feeling a bit confused by his words.

"No, you don't understand." Steve denied. "The plane crash that got me stuck in the ice? I could've gotten out. There was a chance for me to jump out of the plane, but I didn't. I didn't see the point."

Your heart sank at the implication of what he was confessing to you, and all it wanted to make you do is just hold him tight and weep forever. But you knew that wasn't the point, you knew you just needed to keep listening.

"I can't say that I regret it, because had that never happened I would've never gotten to enjoy living a life I never imagined, and I would've never met you, or the Avengers." He explained. "But it made my life far more complicated, and at least once a day I imagine what my life would've been like had I just gotten myself to safety, and that imagining- the 'what's ifs?' is something I'd never wish upon anyone. I do know how you feel, and much like you know the moon controls the ocean, I know things will get better. All you need to do is believe it."

Your eyes momentarily squeezed shut to rid them of the tears blurring your vision. They dripped down your cheeks as you shook your head, and his brave vulnerability made you realize that you always loved him, but in this moment you had fully and irrevocably had fallen for him. It was as if there was no more questions in your mind, you couldn't even understand anymore why you hadn't been with him way before this whole mess. It consumed every single one of your emotions, you simply couldn't ignore it anymore.

"I would never, Rogers, never." You confirmed with a cry. "I can't lie, I've been pushed to thinking about it, but it made me realize that I couldn't do that to you, my parents, Luca. Nobody. I love you so much, and I really hate to hear that, but I'm really glad you're here."

"Maybe this is what was written in the stars." Steve reached his hand up and used his thumb to gently swipe tears off your cheeks. "Maybe all of this was meant to happen so that this moment, right now could teach you that no matter what happens, you'll always have people to catch you at the bottom should you feel like you have nowhere else to go."

"Or maybe the lesson is that the idea of our existences happening at the same time is so unlikely that we have no choice but to listen to the universe." You said quietly, almost coming to that realization in real time. "Maybe you were always meant to be mine."

Steve's heart nearly pounded out of his chest as you spoke those words, then, as you looked up at him and closed the distance between your lips, he felt like a supernova too. He was burning hotter and brighter than ever before when your soft lips connected to his, his chest was mere seconds away from exploding when you pulled away to examine his shocked face.

Trying to process what had just happened, the sound of your giggles at his twinkling eyes and blushed cheeks grounded him and pulled him right back down to earth.

"Wait hold on..." Steve clutched his chest.

"Are you going to throw up?" You asked, wiping the last of your tears off your face as your smile took over.

"I think I need to sit down." He stated, finally making eye contact with you.

Your laugh boomed once again. "You're already sitting!"

"Okay, then I need to lay down." He said, readjusting to lay down on your blanket.

Your smile persisted as you laid down next to him. Shoulder to shoulder, arm to arm, your hands intertwined. "This is better than you throwing up."

"Wait..." Steve spoke, looking up at the moon.

You turned your head to look at him. "What?"

"Again" He insisted, turning his head towards you too.

It took a lot of effort to contain your smile enough to kiss him, but you did, and it felt just as right as the first time. Keeping it short and sweet, it didn't take long for Steve to point to the stars.

"I like these bitches, they're being very nice to me right now" He smiled.

Admitting to how hard you laughed at his statement would simply be too embarrassing, but it was hard enough to yell at him for further irritating your bruised rib. "Now you can't get mad at me for calling you Twinkles."

"You can call me whatever you want, Love Bug."

Butterflies in your stomach erupted in flutters at his choice of nickname. "A cancer and a Gemini, who would've thought?"

Steve shrugged. "It works."

"What now?" You asked with a sigh, you didn't know if you were asking Steve or the stars.

"You fight your ass off in a trial against Harvey, you help us out in an investigation on him and everyone that's been tormenting you, you continue doing what you're amazing at, and you keep that beautiful smile on your face because all of this is about to change." Steve explained. "This was the fuel we needed to start a fire around the compound. It's enough to light the whole place up and change the status quo. By the end of it, it's going to improve the lives of every agent in the program, that's my vow to you."

All his words sounded appealing and genuine enough to believe them.

"Pinky promise?" You raised your pinky on the hand that wasn't already holding his.

"Pinky promise" He connected his pinky with yours, then kissed the back of his hand... then your forehead... then your lips.

He knew confidently, now more than ever, that his love for you transcended time and space. The laws of life, love, nature, and even the stars never applied to the connection you two shared.

Maybe it was fate, or maybe it was coincidence that the boy born in 1918 had a chance to fall so deeply in love with a girl who didn't live in the same era as him.

Or maybe everything did happen for a reason. Maybe your life was already mapped out in the stars, and all you had to do was find the right constellations.

You would always have infinite questions about the intricacies of the universe, but out of all the answers you are confident in, you knew two things for certain.

Steve was your North Star. So long as you had him to guide you, you always knew you'd be on the correct path. You'd always get where you needed to go, and he would always be there for you regardless of what season of life you were in.

He was your star crossed lover.

Next Part: Promotion

Taglist: @saranghaey @firephotogrl74 @selella @talesofadragon @ss28 @nekoannie-chan @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @spikeluv84 @crazyunsexycool @callmissrogers @xxxalicerogersxx @whore-for-chris-evans @em8rin @mulbsstuff @qalijahbydior @awkotaco24 @buckybarnessimpp @nicoline1998enilocin @buckystevelove @rogersbarber @mybuck @dbnightingale24 @ynstark @sincerelytlh @alexakeyloveloki @mrsevans90 @smhnxdiii @claralovescaptainamerica @hisredheadedgoddess28 @bigtreefest @whiskeytangofoxtrot555

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[lightwise]

TBB S3 E10 Reaction

Life has been a bit busier the last few weeks so I am finally catching up on my episode reactions (I’m determined to do all of them this season!) And I apologize y’all, this episode made me very snarky apparently.

I’ll be honest. When this episode first came out I was nowhere near as surprised by it or horrified by it as reviewers seemed to be. Nothing about Palpatine hunting down force sensitive children as experiments and using Cad Bane to do it is a surprise, and the Vault feels so much like Andor. But even on a rewatch this episode holds up so well and honestly just starts to give a cold chill under the skin as the quiet horror of it sinks in.

- Cute kid. And the Batch nowhere to be seen. This is going to be a different episode isn’t it

- Oh no. He’s force sensitive 😫😫😫 hmmm how could that possibly go wrong

- This is giving Andor vibes 👀

- It’s always interesting seeing “regular people” in Star Wars and little markets and how they’re just trying to go about their daily lives.

- Don’t go around snitching people! Nothing good ever comes of it!!!

- Yeah this guy is worse than Timm from Andor. Wtf dude. You’re turning in a baby!!

- Also is it just me or typical Star Wars “houses” end up being pretty dark and depressing?

- Wait okay okay. So this is the CX chamber. Why can’t we see any of them yet 😩😩 what is this red fog? What are these weird conditioning pods? What kind of armor is on this datapad?? *trying to crawl inside my screen* I NEED ANSWERS JENNIFER!!

- “Do you trust me?” Ooooh why do I think that’s going to come back around

- But also, babygirl, I don’t think you actually know what you’re signing up for

- “I could be more useful” “you wish to be the new chief scientist Dr. Karr?” “I believe I’ve earned it.” Alright. This. This is interesting. This fully encapsulates the dynamic that these two have shared. Emerie knows that Hemlock only values things that are useful, and probably only sees her own value in the light of what she can contribute, due to how she was raised and the circumstances she has been trapped in. Hemlock’s tone of voice implies that he has never considered her as being the new chief scientist, and yet he acquiesces quite quickly, almost as though he’s just too busy to think about it and if it means things are brought back up to production standard then he’s fine with it. His utter disregard for Emerie as an actual human and someone with merit is disgusting though.

- But I get it, the man’s busy, he’s got a lot of evil shit he’s trying to do all at the same time 🙄

- So we have “the assets”, which is the area that Hemlock took Palpatine in the first episodes, where the orange containment pods are and the zillo beast is being kept. We still don’t know what those assets are. The Vault is something different.

- Well. Shit. It’s Andor and Narkina 5 for kids. Lovely 😳💀

- “There are few adults left with such characteristics” I WONDER IN THE NAME OF ONE EMPEROR PALPATINE WHY

- Okay so this entire exchange is awful. The kids are so cute! Hemlock is so cold. “Specimens. Assets” ughhh Emerie what are you getting yourself into!!

- Is this the first time we’ve heard the word glasses in Star Wars?

- Oh no. So THIS is why Cad Bane was brought back 🥺🥺

- The score in this episode is perfectly eerie

- Lol Todo is not good with kids huh 🤣

- That poor mama when she wakes up and finds her baby is gone

- I hope that dude has his entire life flash before his eyes as he’s trying to pick all of those credits up

- “My name’s Eva” 🥹🥹🥹 Emerie has no idea how to handle this 😂

- I still wanna know what’s happened with these commandos. No way a clone of Jango Fett is able to look a child in the eyes, call them a “specimen” and not have even an ounce of remorse as they stun them point blank.

- “Jax?” And Eva just points. The power in knowing someone’s name vs a dehumanizing number

- It’s also interesting that these kids are species that are red, blue, and green, and when they get Bayrn in, he’s white. RGB colors make up white light when put together.

- The little peeks of Emerie’s backstory we keep getting are so interesting. She was abandoned by Nala Se. She knows that these children don’t belong here, the same way that Omega told both her and Crosshair that they didn’t belong here either. Nala Se says that the Empire will hold these kids to control them. Emerie feels like she has no power to do anything differently. So much to unpack here.

- Why is Tarkin’s holo so large?

- Lol I honestly love getting to see the backbiting politics of how the Empire functions. It’s so bad and so funny

- Also love that Project Necromancer is so secret that even Tarkin doesn’t know what it is. He’s so nosy

- Okay why does he bring up the CX schematic again and why is it so different than the one we saw earlier??

- Whoa Cid was tortured???

- “The other operatives aren’t ready to join you in the field” why????

- We’re visiting a lot of space stations this season

- Man I wish Emerie had fudged this test

- Nooo let the poor baby go home 🥺

- Oh and now we’re putting kids in solitary confinement. Great.

- C’mon Emerie. Keep clicking that moral compass until it points north

- She kept the straw Lula. She’s giving it to Eva 😭. There’s hope for her yet

#the bad batch #tbb #tbb spoilers #star wars #the bad batch spoilers #Emerie karr #tbb s3 #the bad batch season 3

[teenytinyjimin]

seventh heaven (k. taehyung & p. jimin)

minors dni. DO NOT INTERACT!

summary: in which taehyung and reader just want to have a little fun with their baby jimin

pairing: taehyung x reader x jimin

word count: 3.5k words

tags: smut, threesome (m/m/f), praise, dom!taehyung, switch!reader, sub!jimin, breeding kink sorta?, edging sorta?, hickeys, fellatio, cunnilingus, unprotected sex, feminine!jimin (let him be a lil girly if he wants), taehyung being good at aftercare, also a lot of consent, consent is important yall

warnings: …smut. no other warnings. i’m not a huge degradation/danger/trauma girlie so no need to worry about that

author’s note: thank u guys sm for the support recently i rly appreciate it <3 also i’m not a huge smut writer but i’m trying to work on writing more of it so pls be gentle with me, this is the first official smut work i’ve literally ever completed (i usually always stop midway through lol)

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

Your relationship with Taehyung was nothing short of a dream from the moment it began.

When it came to you and him, everything was perfect. Sure, you had your typical couple arguments every once in a while, but that's what makes a relationship perfectly imperfect. You still go on dates like you did when you first started seeing each other, the flame is still very much alive, and you've built a lot of trust and communication.

So much so that you guys had agreed to open up the relationship not too long ago. Not in the sense that you guys have the freedom to see other people individually (you guys are entirely devoted to one another anyway), but in the sense that if the opportunity to spend the night with a third person arises, you'll both be open for it. You personally found it rather exciting, whereas Taehyung enjoyed seeing your enjoyment. That isn't to say he didn't enjoy it as well, but his priority is, and always will be, your happiness.

Unbeknownst to you, however, Taehyung had a secret weapon. One that he was admittedly a little nervous to use, but knew he had it in his back pocket if he ever wanted it. And that weapon was Park Jimin. His best friend since forever and the boy who secretly had a little crush on you.

It's not like Jimin straight-up told Taehyung that he was crazy for his girlfriend. He wouldn't do something like that knowing it could possibly jeopardize the relationship in question. But Taehyung knew by the way he acted around you and looked at you versus how he acted when you weren't around.

Jimin was a natural flirt, there was no question about that. Just because he loved flirting didn't mean that he wanted to get with someone though. And the one person he seems to never be able to flirt with, the one person he did want to get with, is you. He gets way too shy at the sight of you and he almost feels intimidated by your presence. Everyone has their weaknesses, and his seemed to be you.

The only reason Taehyung hasn't played his Jimin card yet is because he's concerned about their friendship. He doesn't really mind the idea of a threesome with his friend, it's just the fear that it'll change their friendship for the worse instead of for the better. He doesn't want to go through with something like this only for the relationship between them to crumble. We're talking about a friendship that has lasted for years and that has never even come close to dangerous waters. But whether he liked to admit it or not, Taehyung was a people pleaser, and something in the pit of his stomach really urged him to just go for it and see what happens.

And so he decided to go for it. Slowly and with caution, though. If at any time either of you decided to jump ship, he wasn't going to force it. All he wanted to do was see what would happen if you were posed with the opportunity.

So now, here you sat, the three of you cuddled up on your living room couch, a movie playing on the television. Platonic intimacy wasn't abnormal for you guys when it came to Jimin – he tended to be a touchy person around the people he cares about and it has nothing to do with romance or sex. You currently had your head in his lap and he had an arm draped around you, with his own head resting on Taehyung's shoulder. At the moment he seemed completely calm and collected, however neither you nor your boyfriend knew that his heart felt like it was about to beat out of his chest, simply because of you.

“Mm,” you suddenly hummed after an eternity of silence, causing Jimin’s eyes to nearly pop out of their sockets. Having your head close to such valuable parts was one thing, but to make noise that caused the whole area to vibrate was something otherworldly. With all of his might, the poor boy was trying to ignore what just happened for the sake of you not realizing that there was currently a growing hardness under your head. Biting his lip and gently pinching his arm, he attempted to focus on the movie on the television as a way to distract himself from the situation.

Alas, you didn’t shut up to his dismay. However, you did move, which was nothing short of a miracle to him. You lifted your head up from your lap to look over at your boyfriend, a pout on your face. “Love, this is boring,” you whined. Being laid down with your head craned upwards wasn’t necessarily the most comfortable thing in the world so you took a hand and rested it on Jimin’s thigh so that you were propped up with a little bit of support. While your hand held a little bit of weight to it considering the fact that it was helping you stay up, the fact that you once again were extremely close to his crotch nearly sent him to an early grave. His breath hitched ever so slightly and he closed his eyes, trying to shut out everything around him.

“Sorry, Angel,” Taehyung crossed his arms and frowned. “Couldn’t find anything else that was good.” While he looked as if he was entirely focused on you and your upset, he was well aware of the pain you were causing his friend. If his weird behaviors weren’t enough to convince him that he was struggling underneath you, Taehyung’s prior knowledge of Jimin’s attractive definitely was. Just your existence alone was enough to cause the man to be absolutely weak in the knees.

“Pfft,” You rolled your eyes, flopping your head back into Jimin’s lap. “You’re lame for that, Tae. Jimin wouldn’t treat me like that. He’d find something better to watch or do,” You looked up at the boy, who was doing everything he could to avoid eye contact. “Isn’t that right Minnie?”

Heart stopping at the sound of you speaking to him, Jimin shrugged and squeaked out a quick ‘yeah’, not wanting to further the conversation. Had he not known any better, he would’ve thought you were flirting with him and trying to suggest something. But you were in a relationship, that wasn’t possible.

“Well, don’t let me stop you then,” Taehyung looked at both you and Jimin with a smirk on his face as if he were challenging you with your own words. If he knew one thing about you, it was that you didn’t like being challenged and you would prove him wrong in any way possible in an attempt to piss him off. But you knew exactly where he was going with this. He wanted you to prove him wrong for his enjoyment as well as your own.

Reaching one of your arms upward, you gently wrapped your hand around the back of Jimin’s head and guided it down toward yours. When his face was only a few inches from your own you stopped to admire his features. He was a beautiful human, there was no doubt about it, but you never really got the chance to admire him so closely until now. His eyes, though wide with shock, were glimmering and you could almost see little hearts floating around in them. His lips, so big and plump, were the most kissable shade of pink. His skin, so soft and supple, gleamed in the low light of the living room.

Moving your hand to his cheek, you took your thumb and swiped it across his bottom lip gently and slowly. At this point his eyes were no longer wide in shock, but instead relaxed and shy. He looked at you through his eyelashes and if you were honest, you weren’t entirely sure what was going through his head. He was so difficult to read sometimes.

“Are you okay with this?” You whispered gently, keeping eye contact with him. The second he said ‘no’ you were ready to push yourself off of him and respect his boundaries, but you were just as ready to dive head-first into passion if he said ‘yes’. You watched as his eyes went from calm and collected to lusty and pleading, his lips parting slightly. “Yes, please, yes,” He whispered, his tone nearly resembling a whimper. As if his response was music to your ears, you let out a pleased hum as you closed the gap between you and locked your lips with his.

The kiss you shared with Jimin was an experience you had never felt before. Your kisses with Taehyung were otherworldly, incredible, perfect for lack of a better word. But this experience with Jimin was completely new. He was an incredibly soft kisser, his lips moving in perfect harmony with yours, and despite not being able to speak to you he was able to communicate exactly what he wanted and needed just through his kissing. He was needy while still being respectful, and hungry while still being reserved. Yet he matched your energy perfectly with no interest in heating things up unless you initiated it.

As you continued to kiss Jimin for what seemed like eons, you felt a familiar pair of hands slowly make their way from your thighs up to the hem of your pants. Taehyung's touch alone was enough to make you absolutely melt, your arousal going from high to insane within a matter of seconds. There was something about feeling his strong, warm hands trace the hem of your pants before gently unbuttoning them and pulling them down past your knees and then completely off. You let out a soft moan into Jimin's mouth as you felt Taehyung's lips make contact with your inner thighs, kissing them gently and lovingly.

"Mm," Taehyung hummed as he placed one final kiss on your upper thigh, a mere inch away from your throbbing heat. "Looks like my baby's ready for your touch, Minnie," He continued, swiping a thumb down your wet underwear. The feeling of his finger running down your most sensitive area sent a chill down your spine as you squirmed toward him, whining for more of him. Jimin broke the kiss as he looked over at Taehyung with lidded eyes. You could tell by his facial expression that he was in absolute heaven right now. After all, he was getting everything he wanted and more. "C'mere," Taehyung cooed, beckoning Jimin to switch places with him. Happy to oblige, the two swapped spots.

Uninterested in keeping you waiting, Taehyung attached his lips to yours. You were slightly taken aback by the change in pace considering your boyfriend was much more confident and aggressive about what he wanted, but once you were able to match his energy you were able to enjoy the fireworks you always felt when you were kissing him. After a moment of kissing, he pulled away from you so that he could start discarding some of his clothing before helping you pull your shirt over your head.

Jimin, who was now at your thighs, mirrored Taehyung's earlier actions and began peppering your thighs with kisses. As he trailed up from your knees to the hem of your underwear, he used gentle fingers to latch onto the waistband before looking up at you. "I-Is this okay?" He asked softly and shyly, wanting to make sure that he was allowed to go further and that this wasn't just some trick. Letting out a soft hum you ran a hand through his hair and pet his head. "Of course baby, go ahead and have what you want."

Once given the okay, the man didn't stop himself from quickly discarding your underwear and bringing a finger to circle your clit. Letting out a gasp of air, you threw your head back, trying to stop yourself from letting out perhaps the loudest moan you would have ever produced. Soon enough Taehyung's lips found their way back to yours as you continued to make out. You brought a hand down to his hip before slipping your hand down his boxers and feeling your way to his erection. Your boyfriend let out a gentle grunt into your mouth at your touch, his brain foggy with bliss.

As you continued to move your hand along Taehyung's dick, you felt a gentle finger slip into your entrance, and then a second. You let out a soft moan and instinctually pushed yourself down onto Jimin's fingers which began slowly moving in and out of you. They were different from Taehyung's, much smaller, but were able to get the job done very well. When his fingers were as deep as they could possibly go, he curled them, hitting all the right spots in all the right ways.

"Mmh," You whimpered into Taehyung's mouth as you felt your partner smile against your lips before pulling away. He went to go take his boxers off so that his dick could be free for you to do whatever you please to, but you beat him to the punch and immediately attached both hands to the waistband and yanked them down. With a smirk on his face, Taehyung leaned down to give you one more gentle kiss before taking his hand and giving his cock a couple of pumps. "Someone's a little impatient," he hummed, causing you to whimper once again.

As soon as he got close enough to you, you took your boyfriend's dick into one hand and ran your tongue along the tip, eliciting an impulsive moan of pleasure to come out of his mouth. You gave the tip just a couple more licks before beginning to take his length into your mouth. Just as you were doing so, however, you felt a new presence at your core. Not only was Jimin continuing to finger you, but he now attached his mouth to your clit, giving it the gentlest of kitten licks as a way to playfully tease at it. You let out an ecstatic moan which caused your entire mouth to vibrate and caused Taehyung to throw his head back in pleasure.

"You're doing... so good... baby... so good," Taehyung breathed out as he began to slowly thrust in and out of your mouth, bringing his hand to cup one of your breasts. As he moved in and out you continued to swirl your tongue around as best as you could, letting out the occasional moan when Jimin hit your clit in just the right way with his tongue. As he continued to double-stimulate you with both his tongue and his fingers, you brought a hand down to grab at his hair. He let out a soft moan in surprise, not expecting you to grab for him, which caused an even greater rush of pleasure to your clit. He let out a couple more moans and hums, knowing it was helping get you along, until you were seeing stars behind your eyelids and your orgasm came to you not just like a wave, but like a full-blown tsunami.

With your mouth still preoccupied with Taehyung, you attemped to look out of the corner of your eye to see Jimin come up for air. From what you could tell, he looked as beautiful as always, though with tousled hair and a face sheen from your wetness. You watched as, with pleading eyes, he looked up at your boyfriend "Please let me fuck her, Tae."

Taehyung, who was far too busy riding his own high, was snapped back to reality when he heard his friend beg. He pulled his dick from your mouth momentarily, somewhat edging himself, to reach over and swipe a hand over Jimin's sweat-beaded forehead before giving him a nod. "Be gentle with her, Minnie. Don't wanna hurt my angel now, do we?" The older boy gave an eager nod as he began stripping himself of his clothes. You admired his toned figure for a moment before Taehyung guided your chin with your hand to face him. You looked up at him, his hair ever-so-slightly damp with sweat, as reached down and gave you a tender kiss. "You look so beautiful, darling... so perfect," He mumbled, kissing you again before trailing down your jawline and neck. After every couple of kisses he would bite down and suck, leaving prominent hickeys all over the upper half of your body.

Completely forgetting about anything else for a moment, you get caught up in the pleasure of your boyfriend marking you and gasp at the feeling of the tip of Jimin's cock rubbing against your entrance. You feel it twitch slightly at the contact as you already hear a soft moan escape the boy's lips. Before you could even think about anything else he bucks his hips forward as he pushes himself into you, letting out a low whimper until he bottoms out. You throw your head back in pleasure, arching your back and gripping the couch below you. Taehyung comes up from kissing and marking you to look at your face, admiring the pleasure that was coursing through your features. He took a hand and caressed your cheek, murmuring sweet nothings to you while both you and Jimin adjusted to the contact.

Once Jimin was used to feeling you around him he began to slowly thrust in and out of you, going as deep as possible each time he thrusted back in. He was hitting all of the right places and it was driving you absolutely wild, causing you to let out uncontrolled moans each time he reached your g-spot. In an attempt to take advantage of your moans and to chase his own pleasure again, Taehyung returned his dick to your mouth, letting the tip touch the back of your throat so that it would get the most intense vibrations whenever you let out a sound.

At this point, the three of you were going crazy. All that could be heard throughout the house was a chorus of moans, whimpers, and grunts as the two boys thrust in and out of you and you consumed yourself with the pleasure that you were feeling. As Jimin's moans became more breathy and needy, they began to become straight up whines. "I'm..." He panted, unable to form a complete sentence as he began to ride his high. Taehyung, aware of what was happening, stopped momentarily. "On her stomach, Jimin," He snapped. He wasn't going to let his friend cum inside of you even if that meant grabbing him and pulling him out of you himself.

Fortunately able to respect Taehyung's wishes, Jimin pulled out just in time, his dick twitching as ropes of white coated your stomach. He pumped his cock with his hand a couple of times to make sure he got all of the cum out, but after doing so completely collapsed onto the couch, eyes glossed over as he was caught in a daze of euphoria. Your boyfriend pulled his own cock out of your mouth as he grabbed you and gently turned you so that he was able to enter your cunt himself, thrusting in and out of you with sporadic passion and energy.

As he continued Jimin's job of hitting your g-spot, he brought a hand to your clit and rubbed his thumb over it, causing you to twitch under his touch. You let out uncontrolled moans as Taehyung's own moans started to turn into whimpers as he got closer. You began to tighten around him as you rode your own orgasm and he released inside of you shortly after, painting your walls white. As he let every last drop of his cum enter you he continued to thrust sloppily, ensuring his seed was staying inside. Once it got overstimulating, however, he pulled out and flopped down onto the couch between you and Jimin.

"You did so well," Taehyung cooed, pulling you close to him and giving you a kiss on the forehead. He then turned to Jimin and caressed his face, pushing his sweat-dampened hair out of his eyes and rubbing his cheek gently. Jimin was still far too dazed to speak or react to Taehyung's words or actions. He was still in complete shock that this even happened in the first place, but he wasn't about to say that he wasn't thankful that it did.

You watched your boyfriend through lidded eyes as he got up to go retrieve a towel from the bathroom that he could use to wipe your stomach as well as between your legs. He knew that you would probably go take a shower anyway, which is what you should do, but he didn't really want you to be sitting there in that state anyway.

Once done cleaning you up, he pressed a tender kiss to your lips. The three of you eventually got redressed for the time being so that you could appropriately resume your boring movie and watch it to the end. Because let's be honest, even though the movie sucked, you loved each other's company and you didn't want the night to end.

#teenytinyjimin #bangtan #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts fic #fanfic #fanfiction #bts smut #smut #bts v #bts taehyung #bts jimin #kim taehyung #park jimin #v fanfic #taehyung fanfic #jimin fanfic #v smut #taehyung smut #jimin smut #taehyung x reader #v x reader #jimin x reader

[teddynivvy]

HEAR ME OUT.... Ted x reader but in like a high school teacher AU. Ted could be like a History teacher and reader could be an English teacher or something

sorry for taking a few days to write this i wanted to do it justice <3 sfw and gn!reader

ok so i could so see ted as a history teacher and u as an english teacher. you're new to the school ted teaches at, and at first he's really shy and kinda awkward because he can tell right away he is going to have a massive crush on you :')

when you walk into the teacher's lounge on your first day, he's at the coffee machine in a white button up and a loose tie, sipping his coffee and flipping through his lesson plan for the day.

"and this is our lounge... oh! and this is mr. nivison," the principal introduces you, and ted looks up from his laptop and nearly spills the hot liquid all over himself. "ted," he corrects, extending a hand for you to shake. you introduce yourself too and carry on with your tour of the school, but not before making eye contact and smiling at him one more time.

you find that a lot of the kids in your class are also in his, so you end up coordinating fun things to do, meaning you end up spending your free periods together and even hanging out after school sometimes to finish your joint lesson plans.

this leads to a rumour going around that you and ted are secretly dating, so any time you're seen together during school hours the kids are giggling and making up stories.

(ted would also def be the teacher that a lot of girls had a crush on because he was like mildly young and had good banter lol)

eventually it would all come to a head when you and ted are spending some time after school going over lesson plans, deciding on a big project you're going to do and helping each other out with it.

the weather outside is really bad, raining a ton, cold, and dark when you decide to pack up your things and leave the school to go home.

"y'know, i heard a rumour today about you that i thought was interesting," he'd laugh, putting away his binders in his bag.

"oh yeah? what kinda rumour?"

"well apparently you and i are secretly dating."

you'd let out a laugh as you walked down the hallways with him, towards the teacher's parking lot.

"hm, well, that's certainly interesting."

a beat of silence, before you step outside and into the drizzle.

"what do you think about that?"

he'd look at you, a little confused, but blushing nonetheless.

"not the worse rumour i've ever heard at school... i'm certainly not offended by it."

"good to know."

your eyes meet, and he steps to close the distance between you before taking your jaw into his hand and kissing you.

you'd put your hand on his chest and grab onto his tie, pulling him into you and deepening the kiss while the rain fell over both of you.

when you finally pull away, breathless, he clears his throat and you both let out a little laugh.

"can i tell you something?" you laugh

"yeah."

"i've been waiting so long for you to do that."

#ted nivision x reader #ted nivison fluff #ted nivison fanfic #ted nivison x y/n #ted nivison x you #chuckle sandwich fanfiction #chuckle sandwich fanfic #chuckle sandwich x reader #nat writes #THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE HEHEHE

[amberlynnmurdock]

All Mine

Pairing: Benjamin "Dex" Poindexter x Reader

Summary: Dex initially declines going out with you and your friends, but when he starts thinking of scenarios of men trying to flirt with you, he somehow finds himself in the bar to make sure that doesn't happen.

Genres: Angst

Warnings: 18+ content, SMUT, possessive!Dex, jealous!Dex, and I guess toxic!Dex? LOL just be prepared bc this might be the wildest fic ive written

ALSO shoutout to @mayajadewrites for helping me with getting the plot going, you GENIUS <3

Notes: I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE THIS ONE let me know what you think! Enjoy! <3

When he sent his reply to you, Dex stood quietly on his balcony, thinking of ways he could take it back. 

“Thanks for the invite,” he typed regretfully, his anxiety getting the better of him, “but I think I’ll pass for tonight.”

“Are you sure?” He read your text in your sweet voice. “I want to see you.”

He knows you want to see him—he wants to see you just as badly, but the thought of socializing with people other than you was a less-than-ideal situation for Dex. He only preferred to be around you and only you. Part of him didn’t want to share you with other people, the other part simply didn’t want to be around them. 

“Next time,” Dex lied, a pinch in his heart. “I promise.” 

He waits five minutes, and then ten minutes, and when twenty minutes pass by, he knows the conversation ends there. Dex slides the door open and reenters his apartment, sitting quietly at his kitchen table, phone in front of him. 

Scenarios start playing in his mind: you’re only going out with your friends. He’s met some of them and doesn’t care for them at all, but at least he knows you’ll be with them and only them. What bar did you say you were going to? The Black Dog? It slowly dawns on him that other people you don’t know will be around you too, and it bothers him that he can’t control every action of every person. What if some guy tried talking to you? Offered to buy you a drink? Flirted with you? Or worse, what if you liked it enough to never talk to Dex again?

He can’t imagine another guy having good intentions like Dex has good intentions with you. Dex wants to keep you safe from people like that, people he doesn’t know. People who may have ill intentions for their own selfish needs. 

And how can he make sure that you’re safe from people like that, sitting alone in his apartment here, away from you? 

If there’s one thing that will get him out the apartment, it’s the thought of someone trying to take away his North Star from him. 

◎◎◎

Dex arrives at the bar before you do. He’s in his denim jacket and baseball cap. After quickly ordering a club soda from the bartender, he makes his way to the back and chooses a quiet corner to sulk in, to hide, to watch from afar. It’s what he’s most comfortable doing, it’s what he does best. 

He doesn’t touch the club soda at all, bubbles wasting their air in the glass. He watches the people that are in the bar with disdain. They’re all fools, he thinks to himself, but which one will be the unlucky one who tries to talk to you?

The next time the door opens, you walk in first followed by your friends and Dex sinks deeper in his seat, tilts his head down so his cap is hiding his face. He watches you from underneath, bringing the glass of club soda closer to him. His heart may be hard but his eyes go soft every time he looks at you. You’re laughing with your friends, and you look beautiful in your black sweater and jeans. You and your friends find a table in the middle of the bar and that’s when Dex takes note of the people that surround you.

Right now, no one’s paying mind to your table except for him. He smiles to himself each time he sees you laugh—tries to share in the moment with you even though you don’t know he’s there. He wonders what you whisper to your friend at one point. Whatever it is, your friend laughs and hits your shoulder. You have a glass of Sauvignon Blanc in front of you—Dex knows it’s the only white wine you’ll drink—and when you finish it, you look around for your server. 

The bar is much more crowded now and Dex has to move down a seat or two to keep his sights on you. He takes a deep breath and looks down when he sees you get up from your seat to go to the bar. When your back is to him, he looks up and watches as you patiently wait for a bartender’s attention. 

There are plenty of people at the bar, so many that not everyone is sitting on a stool. People squeeze in, lean on the counter, and move chairs out to fit more of their friends into conversations. You’re leaning with your left elbow on the bar, and Dex watches as you wait. Someone behind you accidentally pushes you, and both you and Dex react at the same time. You, startled from the contact, and Dex, sitting up more straight in his seat. He relaxes his shoulders after a few moments when he sees the person scoot their chair away from you, and you seemingly unbothered. 

You glance at your phone, scroll through something, and lock it again before putting it in your back pocket. Dex wonders if you re-read your messages like he does. He hopes so. You sigh, looking around the bar again—you weren’t having any luck getting a bartender’s attention.

And like a cloudy night ruining his view of his North Star, a man in a black jacket and boots stands directly in front of you. He’s got dark hair and a 5 o’clock shadow. Dex straightens in his seat again, high on alert. The man walks by you slowly in a calculative way. He doesn’t go unnoticed on Dex’s radar, not when he’s so close to you. The man walks by and inserts himself between a group, about five people away from you.

Dex feels his muscles tighten and he grips his glass of club soda hard. He has to let go of it so his entire focus is on the scene before him. Good thing he decided to come tonight—he knew this would happen. Dex watches you and then watches the man watching you. He doesn’t like how focused he is on you, how bad of an actor he is when he pretends to look around the bar just to look at you again. Dex takes a deep breath as he sees him slowly weave his way between people to stand next to you. He’s got something in his back pocket he keeps fiddling with. 

You’re oblivious, minding your business, waiting patiently for the bartender. At least Dex is there to protect you if anything were to go awry. He couldn’t have anything happen to you—the mere thought of it made him nauseous, losing someone so important to him, again. 

The man daringly asks the people who are standing next to you to move so he can have their spot. Dex’s throat goes dry as he sees the man brush his shoulder against yours purposefully. You glance up and move as much as you can, but the man moves closer to you again.

“Sorry, crowded bar,” the man says to you. At first glance, he’s handsome, but there’s something aggressive about his nature. 

“It’s alright,” you say shrugging your shoulders. You pretend to check your phone for something.

“You come here alone?” He asks you.

“No, I’m with my friends,” you smile, gesturing your head in their direction. 

“Can I buy you a drink?”

“No, I’m okay. Thank you.”

“Really? You’re the first girl who’s ever turned down a free drink at a bar,” the man says, confused by your rejection. Perhaps even a little insulted. 

“I bet I’m not the first girl who’s rejected you point blank, though,” you say, hoping he gets the message. He’s taken aback by your words, and he doesn’t stop there.

“Bet you just haven’t had a guy like me dick you down to make you nicer.”

Dex doesn’t know what the conversation is, but from your body language and expression on your face, he knows it can’t be good. Whatever it was this man was saying to you, it was diminishing your light—his light—it was an attempt to take his North Star away. Dex stands up from his seat. 

It’s not until the man places his hand on your shoulder and then your neck that Dex feels his rage and jealousy course through his veins, so much so that it’s made him finally get up from his seat and walk straight toward you. The path to what was unfolding in front of him was like walking through a dark tunnel, and like a phantom appearing out of thin air, Dex walks up to the man, paying no mind to you, takes him by the collar of his cheap jacket and pushes him away from you.  

“Stay away from her,” Dex says in a cool tone, chest heaving, hands shaking from adrenaline. 

The man walks right up to Dex, and it’s comical that he thinks he even stands a chance. Dex glances around, the things around him becoming all too obvious. A napkin dispenser. A shot glass. A butter knife. They’re all too easy. 

“Dex,” he hears you call his name, and now there’s too many people looking at them, and the man in front of him is anticipating his next moves and for nothing because just as quickly as Dex made himself known, he’s out of the bar pushing past everyone and walking down the street. Away from those people. Away from you. He hears the door open behind him, unsure if it’s you or not. 

He couldn’t even look at you—ashamed of his actions, ashamed he let you see him like that, which wasn’t even his worse but damn near close to it. He’s leaning forward against a brick wall, catching his breath from the adrenaline of seeing you being touched by another man, trying not to black out from his rage. But you’re right behind him, shocked he was there to save you. What Dex wasn’t expecting were your arms snaking around his waist, resting your head against his back. 

Was it possible you weren’t mad at him for being like that?

“No one’s ever been protective of me like you,” you sigh against his back. Dex is shaking from the adrenaline but he finds it in him to stop and focus on your arms around him. He places his hands on yours and sighs. “Guess you decided to come after all?” You ask him. “I didn’t even see you walk in, but what hell of a timing that was.”

“It was timing,” Dex agrees with you and lies. “I wanted to surprise you.”

“Look at me, Dex,” you say gently. Dex turns around in your arms and you reach up to take off his baseball cap to see his face. “Thank you.”

There’s something in his eyes you can’t read but you agree when he asks to go back to his place.

◎◎◎

“You know, if you wanted to hang just the two of us, you could’ve said so,” you say as you walk inside his apartment and throw your jacket on his couch. Dex turns around and locks the door, feeling calmer than he did before but still on edge. He places his baseball cap on the counter and hangs up his jean jacket. 

“I didn’t want to ruin your night with your friends.”

“It was sort of ruined anyway, but somehow got even better now that I’m here,” you smile. “Seriously, it’s crazy you were there in the nick of time.”

“Yeah,” Dex trails off. “I know.”

“You still seem on edge,” you say softly, “are you okay?”

Dex looks away from you and places both his fists on his hips. He shakes his head. “No,” he says. “I’m not.”

“Why?”

“I—.” How does he say it, without saying it? That he nearly wanted to kill a man for touching you? He almost lost it in front of you and almost lost you?

“I couldn’t stand seeing someone touching you like that,” Dex explains. “I can’t get it out of my head.” 

“Try not to think about it,” you whispered and placed your hand on his face. Now Dex met your eyes. “Focus on me.”

It wasn’t until now he realized he was still shaking from the adrenaline. He never got it out before—the anger and jealousy were still bottled inside, running through his veins with no relief, because seeing you being touched like that by some man triggered something in Dex so strong that not even acting violently could calm him down. It festered in his chest like a sickness that could only be cured by your reassurance, your touch, your presence. 

And here you were in front of him, doing and giving him all of that. It’s what made it so easy for Dex to come to his conclusion that you were, in fact, all his—every part of you, everything, you were his alone. No one else ever had this effect on him the way you do. 

“I just want you to be safe with me,” Dex said, “only me.”

You smiled, even if you didn’t know the depths of his words. They came off to you as sweet nothings but to him it was law. It was no other way. It was unchangeable. 

“You’re mine,” Dex said in a guttural voice, his eyes half moons as he looked at you, “all mine.” His anger and jealousy started to shift into something else the more he looked at you. The more you absorbed his words and listened to him. He knew he had your full attention and he wanted more. The pit of this started beneath the button of his jeans. It was deeper than his heart. 

“Make it so,” you squint your eyes in return, succumbing to his intense gaze. 

Dex placed both his hands on your arms and traced the length of you slowly. You took a step closer to him so your chest was touching his. 

“I control myself so well around you,” Dex says in a low voice, “but right now I don’t want to.”

“So don’t,” you smirk, running your lips lightly against his. 

Dex swallows hard before his fingers find the hem of your sweater and pull it over your head. You stand in front of him in nothing but your jeans and bra and to Dex, it’s still not enough.  Dex runs his fingertips on your sides and slides his hand to your back, swiftly unclasping your bra. You shiver against his touch which is all too sweet.

“Dex,” you say in a low voice, “so don’t.” You repeated what you said before, hoping he got your message. 

Dex lifts an eyebrow and takes a deep breath, his dark eyes looking you up and down before relying purely on instinct. Dex lifts you up into his arms and you wrap your legs around him as he carries you to his bedroom and gently throws you on his bed. You land on your back and spread yourself on his fitted sheets, sheets he knows will be in ruins when he’s had you how wants. 

“I’m the only one who can see you like this,” Dex says. He takes his shirt off and reaches down to unbutton your jeans, slowly sliding them off your legs. You’re shaking. You nod at his words, whatever he says, that’s okay. 

Dex leans over you, his dirty blonde hair pushed to one side, his dark eyes looking at every inch of your skin. You don’t feel self-conscious, you feel seen. Dex kisses your forehead, then your nose, then your lips, and soon he’s peppering kisses between your breasts and down the length of your torso before he kisses the part you’re aching for. 

“I’m the only one who can touch you like this,” Dex says softly as he looks up at you from below. He places his hands on either of your thighs and spreads you open, so he’s face to face with your wetness. “And this,” he says, placing a thumb on your clit and putting not enough pressure on it, “is mine.”

“Okay,” you nod and close your eyes. Dex takes your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours while he kisses your sex and drags his tongue slowly over your folds. You press your head deeper in his mattress and take a long, deep breath. Dex begins to lap at your folds, licking you slowly and then faster, and when he gently wraps his lips on top of your clit and begins to suck on your sensitive bud, you let out a soft moan. 

“I’m the only one who can make you sound like that,” Dex looks up momentarily before he continues eating you out. He looks up at you with his mouth on your clit and closes his eyes again. He keeps licking up your wetness and feels his cock harden in his jeans, aching to replace his mouth with it. But not yet. 

“Dex,” you beg softly, “kiss me.”

Dex stops licking you up and moves up on his bed to be face to face with you. His lips are shiny from your wetness, but you don’t care. Dex slowly leans down and touches his lips to yours. You hold his face in your hands and hold him there for a few moments, opening your mouth to let his tongue in, you taste yourself on his lips. Dex deepens the kiss and you wrap your legs around him again. He places his hands under your back and lifts you, urging you to lay on your chest. You rest your head on his pillow and listen as he unzips his pants and throws them off.

  He puts his hands on your waist and lifts you so your ass is up. Dex spreads your legs and slowly slides in two fingers inside your pussy.

“So wet,” Dex whispers, “just for me.” He continues sliding his fingers in and out of your pussy. He pushes your hand to the side and leans down to kiss you in the crook of your neck. It sends butterflies to your sides, the feeling of his soft lips kissing you sweetly. And the sweetness is gone when you feel Dex’s cock slowly enter inside you.

“Fuck,” you whisper. “Dex.”

“Say my name,” he whispers in a low voice in your ear.

“Dex,” you moan again as he begins to rock his cock back and forth inside of you slowly, feeling your tightness wrap around him. Dex’s arms are on either side of your head, and he buries his head in the crook of your neck. He fastens his pace thrusting inside you, feeling you move against him. You feel so wet and so tight around him, he bites your shoulder softly and says your name. 

“You’re taking me so well,” Dex whispers, “You’ll always be mine.”

“Yeah,” you moan, “you feel so good, Dex.”

“Fuck,” he lets a curse slip out as the more he thrusts his cock inside you the more wet you feel. “Taking me so well,” he says in a deep voice. 

“I’m so close, Dex,” you moan, and when you say this, Dex completely pulls out and you feel the absence of his size, absence of his closeness. Dex doesn’t want to finish with your face away from him. He wants to look into your eyes, see your face as his cock brings you to orgasm. Gone was the dominance, the real Dex wanted this to be special. 

He flips you over onto your back and spreads your legs and wraps them around his waist. Before he enters you again, Dex is breathing heavily, and he reaches up his fingers to caress the side of your face. Your lips are parted—you’re out of breath too—and the gravity of tonight’s earlier situation hits him. He never wants you to feel unsafe again. The only way that can happen is if Dex is in your life.

“You mean a lot to me,” Dex says, and it really is the closet thing he can say to those three dating little words. You smile at him, place your own hand on his face too. You don’t need to say anything. He knows you feel the same. And Dex slowly pushes himself inside your pussy again, feeling your tightness clench him and his size fill you up perfectly. Your face contorts with pleasure and you breath a heavy sigh. The tip of his cock hits your sweet spot each time he thrusts inside you. “You’re mine,” Dex says again as he picks up his pace. 

“Oh, Dex,” you pull him even closer as he continues pounding you into orgasm. Dex's eyes are dark as he holds this intense gaze with you, watching you orgasm like his life depended on it. Your so tight and went around him, when you finally come down from orgasm, Dex finally lets himself reach his own climax. 

“Fuck, fuck,” Dex’s own face contorts and it’s the sexiest you’ve ever seen him, coming so undone like this. He spills his cum inside you on his final thrust and feels his seed fill you up. You feel him spurt deeply and it feels euphoric to feel all of him inside you like this. 

If your relationship wasn’t clear before, it sure was now. You belonged to Dex and he you. As much as you were his, he was all yours. 

#wow #that was wild #LOL #dex #bullseye #wilson bethel #ben poindexter #benjamin poindexter #ben poindexter x reader #ben poindexter smut #benjamin poindexter x reader #benjamin poindexter smut #mcu #daredevil #daredevil born again #daredevil: born again #all mine

[moni-logues]

Oooh, your requests are open! Any rules or prompt list? If there are none, please may I request the following?

You, as BTS Jungkook's Noona. You have a loving sibling relationship, the kind where parents would love for their children to have with each other. The only complaint you have is that he sometimes acts like the older brother, which can be a little claustrophobic when it happens (e.g. chaperoning you on your date when you were teenagers, having a word with your boss when you were overlooked for a well-deserved promotion, etc). Especially when you were a strong (emotionally and mentally, at least) woman, and totally able to f9ght your own battles. Aside from his BTS members, he's good friends with Bang Chan and Minho from SKZ. Given his overprotective tendency, how does he react when he find out that some of his members + Chan and Minho have feelings for you?

Thank you, and please let me know if you have any questions or concerns?

ok so this is like, the very lite version of what you've asked for lmao because I wanted to keep it brief and it could so easily have got out of hand

I don't even really know what to categorise this as.

It's Jungkook's older sister x (potentially) Chan or Minho. It's three men being idiots. It has the tiniest bit of cheek. It is... what it is lol

Word count: 640

Content: none to warn for

Three Men and a Lady

“Hold on,” Jungkook said firmly, his hands up in front of him. “You both like her?” 

“Yes,” Chan and Minho answered.  

“And I’m supposed to decide which one of you gets to ask her out?” 

“No,” Chan replied emphatically. “You have to tell us which one of us she likes more.” 

“I don’t think she likes either of you.” 

Chan and Minho exchanged a confused look.  

“Neither of us?” 

“Why would she like you?”  

They looked at each other again, somewhat at a loss for words. They hung out all the time with Jungkook, and that meant, a lot of the time, with his sister, too; they all had fun together. She must like them at least a little. Surely? 

“Why wouldn’t she?” Minho asked.  

Jungkook stared at the two of them. Yes, they were his friends. He liked them. They were good guys. Good enough for his sister? That was where his conviction wobbled. No one was good enough for his sister.  

He sat back against the sofa and considered it. She could certainly do worse. She had, in fact, already done worse. If she dated one of his best friends, he could probably far more easily keep an eye on things than if it were some other random guy. Chan and Minho were giving him a choice, too. He got to make the decision. He liked that because his sister quite clearly couldn’t make a good decision on her own. But he would have to approach it carefully; both men were competitive and he didn’t want this to ruin their friendship. 

On the other hand, both men were competitive, and that could be a lot of fun. 

“Ok.,” he said, sitting forward again, clapping his hands together. “Let’s do it like this. A competition.” 

Both suitors pulled a face.  

“JK, that sounds weird.”  

“What is this, like 1700 or something? We’re not competing. We’re not trying to impress you.” 

“You should be if you want me to pick you!” 

“You’re not picking us! SHE is. We’re just asking if you know what HER pick is!” 

“And you clearly don’t,” Minho accused, with a roll of his eyes. 

“Woah woah woah...” JK’s hands were up in defence once more. “Let’s just calm down-” 

“Why are we calming down?”  

All three male heads turned to see the woman in question exit from her bedroom. They froze, like deer in headlights.  

“Uh,” Chan began, not sure where he was going after that.  

“Well, it’s-... Uh,” Jungkook stammered.  

“Jungkook is wilfully misunderstanding us,” Minho explained without really explaining.  

“Sounds about right,” she scoffed affectionately.  

“Oi!” 

“You know it’s true.” 

She continued on into the kitchen area of the living space, very much still within earshot, so the guys stayed quiet, trying to make non-awkward conversation with her as she prepared a sandwich and made a coffee.  

None of them had realised she was in. She was supposed to be out—at a gym session or class or something—that was why the conversation was taking place there. Jungkook was supposed to have made sure she was out.  

They were figuratively holding their breath, unsure what she might have heard. Chan and Minho knew she would be furious. She was frequently furious with Jungkook and his over-protectiveness. His possessiveness. She was his sister. His older sister, at that, and took great exception to the way Jungkook acted as her keeper and protector. If she found out Chan and Minho had gone to him first, well, neither of them would ever get to date her. Or probably even speak to her ever again.  

“It’s Chan, by the way,” she said as she took her plate and mug back to her bedroom. 

“What?” 

She paused in the doorway. 

“Chan. He’s the one I like. Sorry, Minho.” 

Then she winked and shut the door behind her.  

#jungkook fanfic #minho fanfic #bangchan fanfic #lino fanfic #bts fanfic #skz fanfic #jungkook drabble #minho drabble #bangchan drabble #chan drabble #chan fanfic #lee know fanfic

[silver-horse]

guys I felt genuine fear in my stomach while reading this tweet...

#this can't be happening... please ... #we really can't have anything good now... huh... everything will be tainted by greed... shit adaptations are incoming #horrid sequels etc... I am so sad that larian doesn't even own the fucking characters they made! fml #I haven't been interested in any of my hobbies in the past decade... bg3 helped me regain some of that joy #but this will be also screwed soon... it's already happening... how great #I understand why they are moving away from bg3... and I didn't expect any new content or dlc or anything like that #but I didn't expect that the characters will be handed over to WOTC ... that is horrible #my post #my posts #bg3 mine #larian studios #current events #giving me doomsday feelings ... but I already had doomsday feelings from the war getting worse nearby... #I guess if russia kills us all I won't have to feel sad about how all my favourite stories are ruined... oh well #apparently my mom is stocking up on food as if a bag of rice could save her if they drop an atomic lol #negativity posting #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #wizards of the coast #twitter

[purpleshadow-star]

Contrary to popular belief I think Andrew has the "technically you can't prove that I can die until I do die; I am immortal until proven mortal" mentality rather than Neil. Because Neil was on the run doing everything in his power to make sure he didn't die, then he went through the whole book series thinking he would die at the end, while Andrew is literally just some guy who decided he could take on the literal yakuza like...

#seriously though andrew was so unhinged for that #well he did make the deal with kevin while on his meds so... #i bet his meds made that mentality even worse lol #but the worst part is HE WAS SUCCESSFUL #he literally kept the yakuza away from kevin somehow like that could not have been good for his ego #anyway you've heard of feral neil #now give me feral andrew #all for the game #aftg #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil

[skunkes]

ok posting it here bc im not sure if its going to stay in the doodle page

#delete later #deleting soon bc eyes on me #for those of you who kept asking about Something last year LOLLL #sorry this is too entry level vent comic ykwim i jst needed to get it out #im over it in the sense that like ok yeah whatever #but not in the sense that i came out worse than before. i was already Small. ive been further Smallened #i was a rebound and lied to and discarded...which thank god i was Set Free but wow! #all my personal fears reinforced. it is embarrassing for me to want and need...i get it neow. i was a stepping stone i am an npc #idk that i could do it again! im not sure its worth trying i am too much of a...project. #as i was told from day 1 but still ran directly into it #and i was too much of a coward to leave myself. if it happened again i wouldnt be able to leave then either. #im happy that i dont think it could get much worse than all that for my first experience but it was also exhausting #and weirdly at the same time i dont think i cld ever expect better #its almost been a year since its been Done and the words and treatment linger <3 #this is also why i had to enlist talon as imaginary bf number 2 LOL need extra reinforcement and love #cringe as fuck but it rly will never be as good as whats in my brain...i know that neow. i will spare everyone the trouble #and remove myself from the dating pool (<- implying he was ever even in it) #i dont even hold any ill will toward em bc they were right...its just hurts ykwim

[babyfairy]

it takes about 5 seconds of thinking about my personal life before i start to cry now i think that’s really cool and good. fun too

#said literally 3 words earlier to my mom and started to cry so i stopped immediately like i’m so tired dude. #i don’t want to think about any of it anymore. i wish i could just go on autopilot. i’m so mentally checked out #from everything and everyone. i feel like i’ve given up on almost everything i enjoy doing #i just work go home watch tv sleep and then repeat it all over and over. i can’t be still. i can’t live in the moment anymore really even #because that means i have to be present and absorb what’s actually going on around me. all the change #i feel like i’m fading into the background more and more every day #i don’t even care either it’s just kind of like …? good lol #the more i fight my grief the worse it gets #if i can outrun it until my time here is up then that’s fine. i’m sure i won’t but. lol #anyway if you read all this i’m fine i just don’t really like being alive it’s whack imo nothing brings me joy long term #it’s all fleeting. mostly i just feel blank and disconnected #and that’s it. and tired lol

[why-the-heck-not]

hate hate hate the feeling of turning in a part of an assignment and being hella embarrased abt how it is :3 like, feeling someone’s just gonna email me like ”hey?? what the fuck ??? what are u doing here this is garbage” like yeah dude i dont know what to tell you, things did not go well this week

#doing one that’s like a bigger thing but has weekly deadlines #and this week hasn’t been good for that so it’s like very fucking pathetic of how little I got done #and it’s all basically shit anyways like i know it doesn’t work and won’t work with the way I’m going about it #also I’m only submitting the previous version bc i don’t even fuckin know what’s going on with this current one #like the code’s all bad and all over the place and I have no clue where i’m trying to go with it #so it’s like i basically didn’t get shit done this week #only made myself more confused #i need to take a step back and like really fuckin think what I’m going to do with this bc it’ll just get worse if I just keep trying to go #with this shitty thing i have on my hands rn #and also im like over an hour late already bc gotta write a weekly report and idk what the fuck to say like #’’oops sorry dude it’s shit rn i have no clue what’s going on but also dont have anything i could ask help with bc im too confused so it’s #just uhh this thing now; a mess <3’’ #the way i’ve been handling this course like ?? uh oh will i ever have the audacity to step a foot to my campus ever again lol #yes im now writing this to procrastinate writing that weekly report thing #ughhh yes im hella positive rn all is shit #(also there was parliamentary election today and it didn’t end well so that might be why everything feels 5x more shitty rn) #april 2023 #2023

[silenthillbunni]

🐁☁️🌫️

#sorry gnna sound like a shit person now but im not feeling well i just need to rant #nothing good ever happens to me. every aspect of my life is a mess. im constantly miserable w nothing to pull me out of it #it's been getting worse nd worse for years nd if it keeps getting worse im not gnna be able to take it much longer #ofc there are sooo many others who have it way way way worse than i do. so i feel weak nd pathetic for being so affected by it when i know #it could be literally sm worse than it is now. like i get that. i know im not nearly as bad off as many ppl are #but idk still it's rlly tough to have *nothing* that makes me keep going. the literal only thing is that i dont kms bc i dont wanna hurt mom #bc im poor so i cant do ANYTHING. i cant go anywhere. not the cinema not concerts not to the mall not to the bookstore not an amusent park #i cant even go to cafées bc i dont have any money at all to spend on that #i have no friends to hang out w. even if i couldnt afford going anywhere i cant even just take a walk or sit nd talk to them bc there r none #my sisters havent talked for me in over a year #and like yada yada i dont have anything to pull me out of my misery bubble. no friends to comfort me no family to hang out w #nothing to do or nowhere to go. hell i havent even been able to eat for 8 months so i cant even like eat smth yummy nd watch a movie lmao #i cant even read bc of the constant noise! i cant go out into the forest bc there r always subway construction work or choppers or gun shots #i know im 'focusing on the negative' but what am i supposed to do when theres nothing positive to focus on lol????? #im always physically uncomfortable bc of pain nd health issues nd im always anxious nd stressed too so like... yay #and. this is where i sound mean but like after years nd years of nothing good happening to me... idc for others anymore like #when they talk abt their loving relationships and their kind friends nd them going to concerts im like.. wow !! u get to be happy!! i dont!! #im just envious nd jealous nd bitter bc why cant i have ANYTHING good???? not just ONE fkn thing? #other ppl get to have multiple things but i get nothing????? #and its not exactly like i hate them or wish illwill on them im just like wow kinda dont feel sympathy for u bc u have sm things #i've never had :))) nd u can never understand how awful it feels to be deprived of it so idc :))))

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Recently Sierra was like you gotta watch more Sharks games on TV and I was like I CANT I suffer enough with the Cuda!! I go to five million Cuda games per season, I can't watch more bad hockey!! And they were like no you gotta. But at the Sharks game tonight I was just watching Nico Sturm and Justin Bailey take a turn around the rink together during a stoppage like idk regency lost in their own world on the dancefloor <3 and I was like... I have been missing NARRATIVES. ROMANCES, EVEN. You guys have been seeing this shit all season?? Omg. Like I gotta get back on the NHL wagon man

#also not to be shady but there are members of the cuda who could outplay some rostered sharks #which says more about the sharks than the cuda but i #quite frankly. question why knyzhov and lindblom are stuck in the minors #LIKE I DONT THINK THEY WOULD MAKE THINGS WORSE?? #anyway...call up guryev...it would be so funny #like to be clear nhl hockey blows ahl hockey out of the water at all times but i'm like..... #its still not GOOD #imagine if i was a fan of two good teams...what would i even post about lol #kaspershark.txt

[coquelicoq]

i just saw someone say that "the vast majority of the userbase is complaining" about tumblr's recent layout change. i see this a lot after a change: people complaining about it (sometimes without saying what about it is bad, making it sound like either it's self-evident (it usually is not) or just that it's bad because it's change and change is always bad) and saying that everyone else is complaining about it too. i don't know how to tell you this but a) you don't follow every user on tumblr so how can you possibly know what "everyone" or "the majority of users" thinks about anything and b) ONLY THE PEOPLE WHO FEEL VERY STRONGLY ARE TALKING ABOUT IT!! people who are not bothered are not spending time posting about how unbothered they are! please look up "selection bias" and stop making me read this nonsense with my own eyeballs.

#i don't get what's so bad abt this change bc it doesn't bother me & no one is explaining it! the most i've seen is it's 'like twitter' #which people don't like i guess bc this might imply that tumblr could be taking more cues from twitter than just the layout? #which is also fallacious reasoning #some changes i do hate. like for instance the change that made it so i can no longer click to the version that someone rbed from #which breaks the prev tag culture :( #but some changes are whatever! and some changes are good even!! #it's fine if it takes time to get used to something being different of course but it seems like the reaction on here can be so extreme #so fast. 'bombard the app with 1-star reviews!!!!' how about you give it a couple weeks and maybe you'll calm down. #i think there's a sense of 'if it ain't broke don't fix it' but it is broke though! tumblr is unsustainable and they gotta do stuff to make #the site more attractive and easier to use for new users. they can do that without losing what makes tumblr tumblr #the layout is not what makes tumblr tumblr! the functionality is. and sometimes that does change for the worse #and i get having complaints about that. but not really about moving the location of some buttons #anyway i haven't said anything before because i don't have strong feelings about this UX change but i DO have strong feelings about #the vague yet very forceful complaints about the UX change that i keep seeing lol #tumblr #fallacies #anyway don't get distracted by my tags. this post is not really about me not understanding what's so bad about this specific change #it's about people who hate a change assuming that everyone agrees with them because they're only seeing the reactions from #a biased subset of the userbase #(by biased i don't mean the users are biased. i mean the sample is biased...it's highly likely to include people who feel strongly #and unlikely to include people who are neutral or feel less strongly)

[sanchoyo]

haven’t been on much bc my dog has been sick :( between seizures and an infected tooth we’ve been having a Time trying to get everything fixed (this started around the holidays so our vet has been very booked up…we have been like 3-4 times in the past 4-5 weeks OTL does not help it’s like an hour drive there, so that’s been exhausting) now his new seizure meds are making him sick (was hoping it was like, just an adjustment period thing but he’s been sick for a week and having concerning symptoms…) if I’m not on a ton or slow to replying to messages it’s bc I’m working as much overtime as my job will give me bc Vet Expensive and mentally drained obvi 😞

#it makes me a lil mad his meds were kinda pricy and they literally are making things worse. like sure he isn’t have seizures but he can #barely walk and keeps running into things and keeps having diarrhea so like. 🙃 and the meds are making him sooo hungry and thirsty #I’m seeing the vet AGAIN FRIDAY I know she’s so sick of me but man my little guy. if she can’t figure out a combo that doesn’t have such #bad side effects I’m literally going to scream and cry #he’s the most sensitive boy in the world and my mental health hangs on his and my cats well being. please. 😭 #sanchoyorambles #I’ve also called them like twice to find out if I should stop or what they want me to do and keep getting ‘oh they’ll call u back’ WHEN #GIRL MY PUBBY #if I don’t hear back before his next dose I’m just gonna make an executive decision myself to stop them for now #he’s literally on the smallest possible dose too bc he’s so little. so. they can’t go down in dosage they’ll need to put him on smth else 😑 #which means paying for ANOTHER PRESCRIPTION A WEEK AFTER ALREASY GETTING ONE THAT WAS $30 ON TOP OF HIS STUPID VET BILL #screaming. #and like if I have the money it’s fine. and it’s not like the vet could’ve known he’d have bad side effects #im just frustrated it’s no one’s fault #I could go to a closer vet. the thing is I LIKE the one further away #they have the only groomer I’ve found that can trim him without sedating him! they send me reminders abt his shots! I like the vibes!!! #they seem caring!! but they are always SOOO BUSY it takes forever to make appointments or to hear back from them 😭 #remember how I said one of my goals was to buy a vechicle this year lmao the vet bills are draining any savings I’ve managed to build up 🤧 #my pets are priority 1 tho like even before all the medical stuff /I/ need like lol… that’s my baby #it’s just really bad timing. not that there’s good timing for medical issues but. u know

[obstinatecondolement]

Trying to research access to trans healthcare in Spain and all I am getting is stuff about legal recognition not requiring medical transition anymore and like? Sure. That's great, but Ireland also has a very straightforward self identification procedure for changing your legal gender and we have The worst access to transition related healthcare in the EU. So, like. How easy is it to medically transition, Spain??

#not saying that it must suck or anything #just that robust self id legislation does not necessarily imply that things are good across the board #and I want to know lol #not that I cpuld realistically move to spain #as unemployable as I am here in a country where I have a hugh level of native fluency in the language #it could only be so much worse there given that I would have no support system and do not speak even rudimentary spanish #also I would melt #40°C would kill me