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#this is the first time i've giffed anything in like years
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this too is yuri
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deanncastiel · 1 year
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hi hello
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woozi · 2 years
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who actually is part of your bias line? blog name woozi, previously jonghan, but all i see you talk about is lee chan his loserness and his strong ankles 🤔
not me getting sniped again 😭
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f1daydreamers · 3 months
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𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐇𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐨𝐧𝐬 [𝐌𝐕𝟏]
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gif credits: @overtake
Pairing: Max Verstappen x Fem!Reader
Summary: Seeing your boyfriend play with his nephews stirs emotions inside of you. While it may be the first time you and Max have acknowledged it, it may also be the last.
Warnings: tooth-rotting fluff, like one mention of alcohol, mentions of an unknown future, parenthood, lmk if I've missed anything!
Word Count: 1.0k words (3 mins reading time avg)
...
The sun dipped below the Monaco skyline, its rays streaming through the expansive windows of the apartment you shared with Max.
In celebration of his successful '23 season, you both agreed that throwing a rather modest dinner would be the perfect way to bring everyone together after a demanding year.
You'd dumped the last of the dirty plates into the sink, thanking Vic as she was already some steps ahead of you, cloth and disinfectant spray in hand as she wiped down the table.
Casting a quick glance around, you confirmed the absence of any stray cutlery, leaving only everyone's respective cups.
However, both your mind and your movements abruptly hit pause, as if your heart had taken the reins, softening at the sight of your boyfriend playing with his nephews, attentively listening to every word they were saying, whether it was meaningful or mere babble.
You smiled as Luka got up and wrapped his small arms around Max's neck, his hand rubbing up and down his little back.
Your eyes even threatened to well up a bit at the wholesome scene. As you brought your fingers up to your face, Max's gaze lifted to meet yours.
You fake-coughed, pretending to shield your mouth, averting your eyes and busying yourself, desperately trying to regain your previously lost train of thoughts.
Max couldn't help softly smiling to himself, but his moment of retrospect was interrupted by a few taps on his cheek from his nephew, who was determined to recapture his uncle's attention.
As the evening progressed on, you constantly found your mind plagued with thoughts that unravelled a potential future with him, one that included the laughter and chaos of children.
Yet, a persistent counterargument resounded in your thoughts, reminding you that neither would be ready, both still traversing the barely begun stages of real adulthood.
The internal conflict tugged at your emotions, creating a fine line between the yearning for a future adorned with parenthood and the sober acknowledgment of the unadorned present. As the dinner gradually transitioned into an intimate gathering with hushed conversations among the group that remained, you politely excused yourself.
Max's arm, once comfortably wrapped around your body, now gracefully descended onto the sofa behind you. With your hand placed flat on his thigh, you leveraged yourself up, slipping out of his gentle grasp.
He let maybe five, ten minutes pass by, granting you some alone time should you have needed it.
But eventually, he placed his beer bottle on to the corner table, crossing the lounge before pushing open and then shutting one of the doors to the apartment balcony.
Lost in thought, your mind had barely registered the sound, your body jolting when his hand pressed into the slight dip of your waist.
You sighed when you recognised the touch a few seconds later, turning your head to meet Max's rather sympathetic eyes.
"Sorry," he quietly apologised. You shook your head, dismissing the need for one. Turning to face him, you wrapped both your arms around his torso, gently resting your head against his chest - a hug he warmly welcomed.
"Want to tell me what's going on in that big brain of yours?" He asked, and you could practically sense the smile creeping onto his lips. He had an uncanny knack for knowing when you needed to unload your thoughts, and his intuition was always eerily accurate. You sighed, feeling his grip on you loosen as you pulled away. Leaning against the railing behind you, Max took one step closer, then another. Pursing your lips, you realised how pathetic this may possibly sound when vocalised. "Just watching you with your sister's kids. It got me thinking, I guess."
Your boyfriend already had a strong inkling as to where this was heading, but he patiently granted you the time and space to elaborate.
He arched an eyebrow. "Thinking about what?"
You lightly shrugged, pressing your bottom lip up to your top. You hesitated for a moment before the next words left your mouth.
"You know, family and stuff. Kids."
Max studied your face for a moment. "Kids, huh?" He said with a knowing smile.
You avoided eye contact, answering with a simple, "I don't know."
He chuckled softly. "Is 'I don't know' code for 'I do know but I'm scared to share my answer' because you think I don't know mine?"
Caught off guard, you silently cursed that eerie sixth sense of his, tensing as you looked up into his eyes. They were light, despite the depth of the topic.
You frowned. "Well, do you.. want children, I mean?"
There was a warmth in his gaze, one that offered you comfort. He looked over your face, his shoulders slumped as if the walls of undiscussed territory had crumbled without much of a fight.
"With you, yeah."
Your frown deepened, but this time, a different emotion flickered in your eyes.
His admission was unexpected, and a pleasant shock washed over you. The corners of your lips twitched as surprise softened into a tender smile. For a moment, your gaze lingered on his face, searching for any sign of jest or hesitation, but you didn't find any.
"If you're ready, then so am I." He added.
And just like that, the hours you spent wrestling with your own thoughts now dissipated into the evening breeze. You held back the surge of emotions within you, searching for the right words.
"Really?" you managed, but not without a quiet sob escaping at the end.
Max chuckled, rolling his eyes as he pulled you into him, embracing you for the second time tonight.
"So fragile," he teased, and you smiled despite the tears streaming down your face.
"Shut up," you retorted, your voice a mixture of laughter and tears.
There was a moment's quiet before your boyfriend spoke. "On second thought, why do I need a baby when I've got one right here?"
It was your turn to roll your eyes now, your voice muffled as you tried to argue.
"Babies cry a lot more."
"Hmm, between you and a newborn? I'd say it's pretty even."
You lightly slapped Max's stomach with your hand; his laughter eventually melting into a warm smile, and he pressed a lingering kiss to the top of your head.
...
Masterlist
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cheriladycl01 · 2 months
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I loved Lando x Actress reader. Can I have Lando x singer reader? Thank uuuuu 🫶🏻
Sing your heart out because he ripped your heart out! Lando Norris x Singer! Reader
Plot: You are a famous singer who was in a pretty toxic relationship and have been single and 'off the grid' for 2 years since your breakup. You come back online dropping a new album that gets people stirred from the tea but the tease at your new relationship.
Credit to quadrantslandonorris for the GIF
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"Today here on Off Camera with me Sam Jones we have Y/N Y/L/N here to talk about everything, from her new albums and songs, to her hiatus, to her sightings, to her relationships" he smiles looking over at you.
"Thank you for having me, it feels great being back and you know talking and meeting new people and I've always wanted to be on a podcast like this so I'm very excited!" you smile and get comfier into the nice seats you guys are in.
"So i think we've got to ask how are you feeling after your time away from the media?"
"So refreshed it was really healing to take myself away from everything. I think a lot of things were being said about me when I first deactivated everything. A lot of them being outright lies, and you know I didn't want to be aware of what people were saying... naturally" you starts and he nods for you to continue.
"But everyday I'd have my friends coming to me saying... have you seen what Taylor Swift has tweeted about you, have you seen what Beyonce and RiRi said. And I'd be like no and I don't even want to know. But when she showed me the love I was getting from all of these amazing people I've worked and collabed with over the years, movie stars who I've walked red carpets with and been in cameos of their movies, models who I've walked runways with all sticking up for me saying how they couldn't imagine anything said about my relationship to be true" you explain and he nods again.
"Yeah, it was actually really moving seeing all these people coming together for you in support! I think even after what certain people said about you the large majority had your back..." he admits to you.
"Yeah, I mean i have some great friends in the industry that you know would message me and always check up on me, so its nice to know that I have people in my corner, after everything that happened!"
"Yeah of course, and I think your new album really shows your raw emotions and I think a lot of people have easily related. So lets go through the album, we have Vicious, which talks about obviously Y/E/B and the emotional scars he's left on you. One of my personal faves is 'bet u wanna' where you talk about being mistreated in relationship and calling it off only for them to want you back. Nonsense which obviously has made your fans go stir crazy- wondering whose got you feeling this way. Bad for Business which obviously has a similar tune to Nonsense in whoever you are talking about, and may i just say people will listen to the happy songs because they are incredible! But talk us through the creative process and how your time away released all of these on the album and more!"
"I think, when you go through something like i did. Where you don't necessarily see and end you have these raw emotions that just tend to write themselves on the paper. I had many nights where I'd be sat in the studio hair pulled back, a massive slice of Pizza on my left and a bottle of water on the other and it would honestly just write itself. There were some nights where I'd just cry and sit there. I think things really sped up when I met my current partner" you blush, thinking how much that silly vroom vroom man had helped you.
"Who is he, and how did he help, how did you both meet if you can tell us!" he asks leaning back a little.
"Well, I'm currently dating F1 driver Lando Norris which when this podcast airs and sure will be a shock to everyone. We met when I was in a really weird patch. I think it had been about 8 months I want to say of being single and dealing through my grief and not really knowing what to do with myself. My ex of 5 years was now dating and having a child with the girl he cheated on me with, and honestly I was a mess. My dad decided to take me to a race, it was the one in Austin, we had paddock passes and that's where I met him" you grin thinking back to the day.
*Flashback*
You were at the Circuit of the Americas for race weekend, you were tucked behind your dad who had found some mechanics he was animatedly talking too. Your dad always had a real love for cars, and when you'd made it as a musician you brought him and your mother a larger house with a big garage for a car collection you'd help him grow.
"Damn you've got loads man. How's your girl affording all of this?" the mechanic asks not having seen you as you were wearing both sunglasses and a Ferrari cap.
"I have a ... lucrative job" you croak out a little, if you were being honest with yourself this was probably the first interaction you'd had with a stranger in months, even just any human at that as your contact had been very limited over the past 8 months even to friends and family.
"Ahhh, so what's your fav car in the collection Mr Y/L/N?" the mechanic asks, and some nods from his pals also tells you guys that their interested.
"Oo that's hard it's got to be a toss up between my Mclaren 650S, the Ferrari F8 Spider, or my Rolls Royce Ghost" your father admits trying to think to his collection.
"Not the Porsche?" knowing you'd got that for him for his 50th.
"Mmmmm I forgot about the Porsche" he admits with a chuckle. The mechanics just all looked very shocked at the sheer amount of cars your dad has in his collection.
"Give me a second, I want to see if I can get you guys a garage pass upgrade. I bet you'll want to check out the car's yeah?" he asks making your dad nod very quickly.
You pull your glasses off to give them a wipe as the heat was making them fog up a little and the mechanic gasps, you cock your head realizing he's recognized you.
He scurries of, running back to the Aston Martin garage, he tells all of his friends but says to keep it quiet as he could tell you'd been going through it. Aston Martin didn't have any passes left, so he went to the other garages begging to give you a pass.
"Who did you say was here?" Lando had asked from beside his team mate Daniel Ricciardo.
"Y/N Y/L/N but don't make it public knowledge she's clearly just here to watch the race with her car enthusiast dad. Who did you know owns over 10 super cars that Y/N has brought for him, he was telling me all about his Ferrari" the mechanic starts to ramble before Lando gets him to stop.
"Take me to her, and I'll give her the pass" Lando had offered, wanting to meet you, it wasn't uncommon knowledge that he liked both you and Taylor Swift and had even DJed some of your 'nightcore' remixes.
"Okay! Okay come with me" the young mechanic said, darting of making Lando run after him asking him to slow down a little.
"Hello, this is a Mclaren Driver he's ..." the mechanic starts before you offer him a small small.
"I know who he is Dean, thank you for introducing us" you smile, and he grins at you. You and your father get handed the passes and your walking back to Mclaren at Lando's side.
He was attractive and most certainly your type. He had that goofiness about him that had you laughing for what felt like the first time in 3 years. Yet a seriousness and passion for his sport when talking to you and your dad about the car he was more than happy to show off to you.
"So you'll only be cheering for me right?" Lando flirts as your dad introduced himself to Daniel Ricciardo and Zac Brown.
"I think that depends Mr Norris, are you going to give me a cheer worthy race?" you question looking up him. His face lights up and a big grin comes onto his face.
"Always, you'll see the Papaya on a podium today I'm sure of it!" he offers and you smirk.
"You get that podium and I'll take you out afterwards"
"On like a date?" he asks a little cautious with his tone.
"Yes a date" you nod and his face lights up.
"Yeah alright, your on" he smirks, he turns away to get ready for his race, but turns back placing a cheeky kiss on your cheek making it your turn to blush.
True to his word, Lando came second on Sunday. You took him out on your guy's first date and the rest is history.
*Back to the podcast*
"Wow, that really is such a beautiful story. And from how you talk about him we can tell that you are really happy" he smiles genuinely.
"I don't think I've ever felt so secure with a person. I think it's safe to say I've found my person. I went through a lot with Y/E/B and Lando has helped me overcome a lot of the trauma from that relationship, and I cannot thank him enough for how patient, caring and loving he has been for the past year" you smile, before turning your gaze to the side to look at a teary Lando who had come to the podcast with you, you were scared and didn't want to go alone.
"Well I think it's safe to say we are all so happy you are back, thriving making music and doing what you do best!" he smiles.
After that your asked a few more questions which you happily talk through and answer, before it's wrapped up and time to leave.
"How was that baby?" he asks knowing this was your first media thing to help ease you back into that 'lime-light' life.
"It felt good to just vent, and talk about everything" you smiled at him. It was truly healing for your soul.
"I love you so much, and I'm so proud of you for today!" he grins at you, pulling you in for a kiss. He holds you close, while another hand travels up to caress the side of your face.
"I love you most, which is why I need you to help me announce the 2023 tour... and my new album!" you grin, and he grins back.
"What are they called?" he mumbles into your neck that he'd found retirement in.
"The Grid!" you grin, Lando didn't know but you planned your next tour for 2023 around the 2023 races.
"Hmmm and what does that entail" he smirks.
"Well, I'll get to come to every race weekend with you this year, my tour is roughly going to follow the races. I'll venture out as well when you have breaks and stuff but I don't want to be away from you for too long, and I want to get back on the scene. I'm ready!" you admit and he smiles at you softly before lifting you up into a huge bear hug.
"Did i mention how much I love you?" he asks.
"Every day Lan, every day" you smile at him, pulling him in for another bruising kiss.
It was safe to say, that even though you'd been treated like shit in the past, Lando Norris was the love of your life. Your soulmate that held the other end of the invisible string that had kept tugging you both closer together.
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @kapsylia @laneyspaulding19 @lazybot @malynn @cassielikereading @viennakarma @teamnovalak @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @jlb20416 @yourbane
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red-riding-wood · 2 months
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PSA - Community Predator
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Over a series of months, myself and other Tumblr users -- fic writers, gif makers, fans of created content -- have been victimised by @mrkdvidal1989, who has extensively lied about who he is, preyed on multiple women and denied involvement -- therefore ruining friendships, reputations and feelings, and promised me life-saving medical treatment that he never followed through on.
More information including mine and their stories under the cut.
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The reason I am going public with this is twofold:
A) To protect others from being hurt. He is known to reach out to many tumblr users, especially young women in the Cillian Murphy fandom -- but he may have a wider reach beyond this circle. B) Since his "disappearance" three weeks ago and the unravelling of his lies, this man has ruined my life and the only hope I had of obtaining treatment for a condition that has been plaguing me for four years.
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Killian Vidal is the name he has chosen to give us, and has claimed to be both a officer commander and general in the mobility troop in the SAS (the general rank does not even exist), has beaten cancer a while ago (but said to another mutual that his "time was running out" and he is currently struggling with it), and a plethora of other life experiences and general knowledge about him that varies in consistency when talking to different people and is questionable in its validity. He has also shared pictures of "himself" that when reverse image searched, belong to different people.
I got to know Kill when he reblogged one of my fanfics (as the story seems to start with a lot of his victims) and he reached out via DMs. We quickly became close friends who called nearly every day on Discord and when I told him about my health issues, he immediately offered to pay for my medical treatment wherever I could find willing doctors.
I was hesitant to believe this at first since all of this seemed too good to be true (and was). He claimed to be very wealthy, enough to afford private jets like it was nothing and to rent me an apartment in the UK in the same building as him. Over time, I grew to trust him because he felt like such a genuine person and friend, which was made all the more believable by the fact that he has such a huge following on Tumblr and was, at the time, part of a vast social network of fans and friends (one of which he even claimed to know IRL -- who will remain anonymous unless they decide to speak out). I decided to ignore the little red flags because I was so desperate to receive this treatment that for me would be life-saving.
For four years, I have been plagued by an array of (mostly) undiagnosed digestive issues that have made my life almost unbearable and have on numerous occasions nearly killed me due to malnutrition. I've spent months in hospital, endured years of malpractice and misdiagnoses, undergone heart surgery, and have tried absolutely everything I can to get better. In the winter of 2023, I was told by my doctor that I was refused in the TPN program (a treatment that may have slowed or stopped my weight loss) and that with or without it, I was looking at mortality. Refusing to stop fighting but having exhausted the public health care system in Canada, I went into 2024 not really having much hope of anything anymore.
So, when Kill came along, that changed. He promised -- and I mean, from the bottom of his heart, promised -- that he would help me get treatment, that he would get me out of my abusive home and fly me to the UK, that he would be there for me as my friend, etc. I was beyond grateful, and as my trust with him built, so did my hope.
The travel plans kept getting put off; originally, he would fly me out as soon as the apartment became available, which was the 11th of Feb, 2024. He kept finding excuses to not book the jet. Finally, it seemed as if around the 15th/16th I would be flying. My health had been declining rapidly and the situation was becoming all the more urgent, and he said he was in contact with a pilot and would send the ticket soon and call me.
That was the last I heard from him. The 16th.
Initially thinking he had ended his life (he had discussed thoughts of suicide with me prior to this), I was beside myself with worry not only thinking one of my closest friends was gone but also that my chance at life was. I reached out to his other friends, and I made several calls to the UK authorities and emergency services and ended up requesting a welfare check be made to see if he was even alive.
They reported that no one under the name Killian Vidal was in the records of the building name he gave me -- the same building that I was meant to live in within that week.
After reaching out to my now beloved friend @kittenonpluto (A.K.A., Cas) on Tumblr, I learned that Kill was in fact alive, and had told her that he was in hospital for digestive issues in Indianopolis, United States (though again, no record of his name in their medical system). He still wouldn't talk to me, but told her to tell me that he would reach out when he was out of hospital.
Cas and I compared information he'd told us (her story will be attached to this post) and looked into the mystery more. He constantly dodged confrontation and questions about the fake photos and information he'd sent her, and seemed to use his completely fabricated hospitalisation as an excuse to not fulfil his promises to myself and her, as well as a means to garner sympathy.
It was quite obvious that he didn't know how the American medical system worked, and he even incorporated elements of my actual story and used them in his. When asked about his treatments, he responded with medically false information. He reported digestive issues, reflux, and having both an NG tube and TPN -- both of which I have experience with -- and let me say, I am beyond disgusted and infuriated that my real life trauma was used as a ploy in all this.
How do we know for a fact this is false? I checked the police case for his welfare check again, and they said that they confirmed him being in the UK at the same time he had told Cas he was in hospital in the States.
After a final confrontation from both Cas and myself (and a desperate final plea for the medical aid he promised me), he was never heard from again from either of us or our friend circles.
I'm now having to pick up the pieces he's left me in and to be honest, I have little to no idea of what the hell to do or how to save myself. The fact that he strung me along for a month and built up my hope that I was going to live only to abandon me without even a word is deplorable to me.
And mine isn't the only story. I've heard from four women on Tumblr (who, again, will remain anonymous unless they choose to speak out) who he has been romantic or sexually involved with (and lied about his involvement, made them out to seem insane or toxic, created rifts in our friendships, toyed with their emotions, and made false promises to of relationships, marriage, and finances).
And that's not including the ex-wife who came back to Tumblr to claim that her and Kill had never met nor married. She was promptly silenced by a "lawyer threat" that we have strong reason to believe was a bluff.
At the end of the day, there are so many lies, half-truths, inconsistencies, etc. this man has wrapped himself in and we don't know for the life of us what his motives are, but from the information that we do know is false, he isn't genuine. He toys with people. He hurts them. Myself and the others that have been affected by this want that to stop.
And at any point, he has the ability to make a new account, and take on a new persona, pretend to be someone else. Tumblr is a wonderful place and I have met so many cool people on here, but please be careful about who you interact with and what you share, because aside from making this post, it is beyond my power to stop him from doing what he does. But after what he did to me, I could not remain silent.
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Other Stories
If you have an experience or story with Killian that you would like heard, please reblog it on this thread or make a post. With your consent, I can include a link to it below.
kittenonpluto's story
aurorag98's story
everyoneisawhore's story
your-nanas-house's story
hllywdwhre's story
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Final Note
Lastly, if you have read this far, thank you.
If you want to reach out to me about this issue -- whether it's to anonymously share your experience, ask questions, ask for evidence (of which I can back up these statements with), or anything at all --, please do not hesitate to do so. <3
For those who may be worried about the potential legality of this post, everything that I have stated as fact is fact and it is not my intention to slander or spread false information.
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xamag-draws · 6 days
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BBR thoughts 2024
Since I mentioned that I finally dusted off an old project of mine and was ruminating on how I'd remake it, I thought I'd elaborate a little, now that I've solidified some concepts. For funsies
This is gonna be a bit of a long and unfocused one, but I don't share my personal thoughts here often, especially the stuff about my projects I always marinate in. And for once it's something that people have existing context for, so hey why not
So for anyone who hasn't been following me for a gajillion years, The Black Brick Road of OZ was a webcomic that I posted around 2013-2015, back when I was in highschool going on college (which is kinda crazy to think about). It was sort of a darker twist on The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, although I definitely leaned a lot more into dark humor more than anything in those first few chapters
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I don't think it's available to read anywhere anymore, and I know people have been asking me about it. So here's the full proper archive of BBR, as full as it can be with deceased Flash
I totally used it as an excuse to shamelessly and self-indulgently experiment. It had interactive pages and GIFs and was wayyy too overproduced for what I could handle or what was necessary, but I did have great fun making it while it lasted
Unfortunately, that excess and the fact that I've changed too much as a person by the time I was in college is what ultimately killed it. The direction I wanted to go in was practically unrecognizable from the original idea started back in 2011, so there were many old hold-ups that I felt ruined it
At the time I kinda wished I could start/rewrite it all over, but considering that I pretty much had the entire script done at that point, it felt like a pointless sisyphean task. So I just put it on a shelf and didn't look back for about 8 years, because I didn't know what else to do
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Now to be fair, the nature of my art has always been iterative and cyclical; when I feel like my creative juices have run dry I prefer to leave a project to marinate and move on to something else; cycle through other old things and bring in new skills and perspectives into the mix when I'm ready again. Not very productive, but it is what makes me happy to work on my OCs; I'm doomed to hit a wall with them eventually and I need some time to be able to find a new direction
So that said, I'm glad that BBR was left to marinate for that long. I don't think I was prepared, emotionally or intellectually, to tackle it again until now. The Wizard of Oz book (and the entire series of them, really) has always been near and dear to my heart, but there's a lot of context around it that I'm only unpacking now that I'm older
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I think I always inherently feel negatively about the stuff I've made in the past, like its faults always jump out to me more than the positives, especially the more time passes. I've never liked that, and I do really appreciate the kind things people have to say about BBR to this day. The fact that it still can be recognized and remembered is very sweet
When I left it, I already found it "kinda cringe", and that feeling only deepened with years. When I took my first look back at it, asking the question "how would I rewrite it now?", at first I took a very cynical approach, as in "everything would have to be torn down"
But the more I sat on it, the more I found that I still see some merit and charm in the ideas I was putting out; I just didn't know how to execute them at the time (not to pretend that I know what I'm doing now, but I certainly know more at least). Turns out a lot of my old concepts could be changed substantially with just a few small tweaks. So I'd say that's a nicer way to think about my previous work
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If you haven't seen yet, I posted a first draft of my new designs for some of the characters (the main group, the Goods and the Wickeds). Definitely subject to change, but more or less how I see them now
I'm just playing with these concepts; by no means would I attempt to remake BBR right this moment. Call it a pipe dream among my other ones. But just for fun, this is the direction I'd like to take:
Nowadays I'd probably make it a visual novel, with more emphasis on the visual part than the novel because I'm no English prose writer by any means. It'd still let me play a little with the interactivity while helping cut some corners on the drawing part (only some, I imagine I'd go hog wild anyway)
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I've always intended for some events inspired by the sequel books to take place in BBR's past. Stuff like Jinjur's revolt or Ozma's rule preceeds the main events here. So I think it would be fun to follow the past of a few key characters alongside the main story. One chapter focusing on the present quest to see the Wizard, then one focusing on the past events (that are maybe reflective thematically); rinse and repeat
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I'm also sticking a little closer to the original text in some regards. Not everything that I enjoy from the books would be translated here, it's still just a very loose fantasy on the material; but I'd like to be closer in spirit at least
I like mature, wise and powerful Glinda, I like kind and vulnerable Tin Man, I like the Wizard being a pathetic yet loveable liar, so I'm sprinkling in more of that for example
I'd like to keep some whimsy, but make it more grounded and a bit more serious to be coherent in tone. I think the original TWWOOZ book was a more realistic fantasy in some ways, even for the standards of the time; I like its simple but vivid tactile descriptions and details like bringing attention that Dorothy needed to eat and sleep
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I find it funny that Baum specifically was averse to making his books scary or unpleasant, finding that unnecessary for telling a compelling kids story, but they still can get pretty dark and disturbing, at least for our modern sensibilities. Let's just say that I intend to use the Evoldo and Chopfyt storylines for my purposes. In that way, I feel like a "darker" Wizard of Oz retelling can still mostly be tonally in line with the original and balance it with enough heart and occasional humor
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I slowly grew to appreciate the quaint old-timey quality of the original series, as well. The first book is both timeless and very much a product of the 1900s. Originally I tried to give it a little modern or at least anachronistic spin, but it was moreso because it's what I knew best, so these days I'd rather intentionally lean into the time period. Still not fully historically accurate by any means, but at least directly acknowledging the influence
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The events of the story span across 40 years of these characters' lives, so I'm drawing inspiration from the entire so-called La Belle Epoque: the time period around 1880s-1920s. Basically I'm cooking, and my soup is old Victorian fashion morphing into Edwardian fashion and slowly inching towards flappers
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Some new Dolly outfits
Lots of crazy things, political changes and innovations were happening at the turn of the century, which I think is noted and reflected by Baum in the books as well; the character of Tik-Tok might not blow any minds now, but he was one of the first robot characters in literature at that point; and don't even get me started on Jinjur, etc. Plenty of really interesting stuff one could lightly ponder in an Oz adaptation these days
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Aesthetically, art nouveau has always been a big artistic influence for me, and it'd definitely be its time to shine here. John R. Neill's illustrations of the Oz books often keep me company as well. Nouveau architecture in particular fits that fairytale whimsy extremely well imo
I'd allow myself a little bit of art deco here and there, but ultimately its intimidating geometrical splendor is an antithetical to the flowery nature of nouveau and I associate it with a completely different era. Definitely fitting some characters like my Wicked Witch of the West, but shouldn't be overused
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One of my main problems with the original BBR was that eventually I lost track of what it was even about; and the original ending felt too mean and unfulfilling to be worth it. Now I'd like to stick to the theme of home and family as my main theme, but in a different, more bittersweet way than in the book
An interesting connection I made is that a lot of my aforementioned older key characters (the Witches, Jinjur, the Nome King, etc) all came from the same reformatory as kids, that's how they know each other. In my recent research I learned that in those reformatories it was usually frowned upon to release the children back to the families, which were seen as the original corrupting influence regardless of the circumstance. The reformatory did everything in its power to cut that connection and make itself the only family those wayward kids were supposed to know and love. That's an unexpected tie into the theme of home that I'd like to explore as well
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So yeah that's the current state of it. I have a bunch of outfit concepts I'm slowly cooking, although I'm now sure whether I'd post them... But I do miss these funny guys, and I'm glad some people still do as well :)
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intimacyequalsdeath · 6 months
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heyya!!!... Beautiful💐.
I see requests are currently open, so if you don't mind... can I request a sexy wife s/o who loves to cook and will always make slasher food? And prepare all their needs (you know like a good wife in general🙃),My twin sisters really like their slasher Especially for Bo, Lester, Vincent, Thomas hewitt,Charles Lee Ray and Michael Myers...
Oh, I also think it would be great if they had obedient children with the wife s/o. They know how their father is and they choose not to worry too much about it. Please....I'm sorry if I requested when your requests were closed, but, I've been looking for a blog for a long time whose requests are still open and finally I found your blog 😭.
My twin sister is sick and I want her to be able to read the story you made from my request 🙏.
Love you dear
Thank you so much for the request sweet anon! <3 I hope me deciding to do Headcannons for each story was ok to anon. Sorry this took so long, I worked on it in chunks over the course of a few different days.
Also I hope you sister feels better soon Anon <3 <3
Slashers with a good little wife and good little children: The Sinclairs. Michael Myers, Thomas Hewitt and Charles Lee Ray.
Also not my gifs, not of the gifs I use are ever mine and full credit goes to the original creators <3
Notes: Minors DNI, Written with AFAB in mind as per request, suggestive themes. Story under the cut. Request centers around "traditional" wife roles. Talks of pregnancy and children.
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<3 : Bo loves the idea of having a good little wife and good little children to boot. He just never thought living in Ambrose and as a man with his hobbies he would get to experience that, until he met you.
<3: You instantly took over cleaning and cooking, even some of the spots in Ambrose no one even went into anymore. You had no idea how the boys had managed to survive so long with living like they were raised in a barn.
<3: Bo also liked how you liked to steer clear of anything having to do with his business and what went on at the gas station.
"it ain't your place" He murmured once into your hair when you asked him about it when the relationship was still relatively new. That was the first and only time he ever had to tell you that.
<3: Bo was thrilled by your want to stay out of his and mind your own that it was surprising when you ultimately fell pregnant after only about a year being in Ambrose. As if he'd let you leave.
<3: Bo let you take care of all the child rearing duties, with him being gone usually all day it was just easier plus the last thing he wants to come home too is crying children after a long day.
<3 As the children grew you had to teach them about what their father and uncles and explain why it would be inappropriate to ask anyone about it. All they needed to know was that they were safe and their daddy loves them.
<3 The sight of you being rounded with HIS baby also does things to Bo, So don't be surprised if he makes it a goal to keep you pregnant as often as possible.
<3 Bo would be a in and out father I think though, not that he means to be he does love the children. His relationship with his own father affects how active he is a lot of the time and since that's the only father figure he has to go off of he doesn't wanna turn out like him.
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"Papa!' The children yelled as they ran through the door of the gas station to their father. You had a free instance of free time so you thought you'd bring them down to bring Bo some lunch.
"There's my babies" Bo said opening his arms to catch all 3 of them up in them. He turned to you poised and ready for the kiss you planted on his lips as you set the basket of food down on the counter.
"We made you lunch papa!" Your youngest girl said as he placed her back on the floor. Bo smiled at her.
"You did now didya?" All three children nodded as you opened the basket and began to explain to Bo what you made him. It wasn't long before your family bubble was interrupted by a car pulling up outside.
Bo's gaze hardened as he turned to look outside the station windows he then turned to you and the kids before barking an order.
"You four need to go on and get back to the house now" He said, The children having been through this before nodded before falling in line behind you to head back home.
"I'll come get ya'll when I'm done" Bo said planting a last kiss to your lips before you waddled out of the gas station, giant pregnant belly and all three little ducklings in tow.
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<3 Soft mushy Vincent is soft and mushy.
<3 You are his doting little wife and he is your doting husband. His heart swells every time he sees you coming down into the basement with a plate of food and a drink.
<3 At first he was a bit nervous about you growing board of Ambrose since he wouldn't let you be involved but when he saw you begin to clean literally anything and everything he figured you were alright.
<3 Vincent loves your cooking and it actually helps rouse him out of the basement to come and sit at the table with you and his brothers.
<3 When you fell pregnant the first time, He was stunned. Like truly stunned. He never thought fatherhood more or less being a husband was in the cards for him ever.
<3 To know have both he couldn't believe it. A cute little house wife and a baby he hoped would look just like you.
<3 If the baby isn't twins expect to start trying for a sibling right away. Vincent like his brothers adores the sight of you pregnant with his baby. It awakens a primal instinct inside of him to be the provider and keep you safe at all costs.
<3 Vincent would be afraid that the baby would be afraid of his face or his mask, no matter how many times you assured him other wise he couldn't help but worry.
<3 If the children grow up to question their fathers face or what he does in Ambrose, you and Vincent will tell them the loose truth obviously omitting a lot of detail. At least until their old enough.
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"Vincent, your her daddy. She'd never be afraid of you" You told him softly, reaching out in an attempt to hand him your daughter.
Ever since she was born Vincent refused to hold her as he didn't wanna scare her off with his mask or his face.
He looked into your eyes as he went to shake his head, before he could though you had shoved your baby into his arms and positioned his hands in the proper places to hold her.
Vincent jumped at your sudden action but was never the less quick to cradle his daughter. He looked down at her once she was settled and when his eyes met hers that matched your perfectly he felt his breath leave his body.
Vincent had never experienced a feeling like this in his entire life and doubted he would ever feel it again. He was head over heels in love with this little human the two of you had made together and from that day he vowed that anyone who tried to come in-between him and his family would have him to answer too.
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<3 Lester is used to cooking and cleaning his own space so it takes him awhile to get used to you doing it for him.
<3 He appreciates it greatly but he doesn't fully understand why you would want to clean up behind him like you do though. Like he picks up roadkill all day who would want to smell that?
<3 He doesn't complain about you cooking though, He thinks your food is amazing and it's great to come home to a warm cooked meal every night.
<3 You do so much for him so don't be surprised if Lester comes home every so often with little gifts he's collected for you. Some of them may or may not come from victims but as Lester's good little wifey you never question it, you just press your lips to his and thank him for the thoughtful gift.
<3 When you fall pregnant, again like his brothers, Lester is thrilled. He can't be in the same room as you without running his hands up and down your swollen belly while trying to feel the baby kick.
<3 Lester wants a football team of children, so be prepared to make many renovations to the cabin the two of you share to accommodate all the children.
<3 Lester loves bringing his sons out on the road with him when their old enough and with your permission of course. He'd never let them participate in anything Bo or Vincent do but helping him with roadkill is just fine by him.
<3 If any of the kids ever questions what their uncles do in Ambrose and why Lester doesn't usually want them around it, He'll tell them that it's because of Vincent's delicate projects and that answer is enough for the kids.
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"Nah sweetpea, you know why you can't go to Ambrose" Lester softly told your son after the fifth time he had asked to go see his uncles. Your son sighed and pouted slightly before speaking.
"I know uncle Vincent's art is easy to break but I promise I won't ruin anything"
"My love, I've told you it's rude to question your father" You piped up from your chair in the living room, running a hand over your slightly swollen belly. "Why don't you go join your brothers outside for a bit before dinner, and stay where we can see you" He gave you a sad look but nodded and went through the front door outside.
"I know the boys love Vinny and Bo, but I just want em to be safe" Lester told you sitting on the arm of your chair and putting a hand over yours sitting on your belly.
"I know Les, but when their older they'll understand why we have rules" You shot him a smile and he gratefully returned it. He was so lucky to get someone so understanding of the "Family Business"
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<3 Thomas was raised to be a family man. Luda Mae had always told him growing up that one day he would need to find a wife to continue the Hewitt family with.
<3 Enter you, ending up at the Hewitt farm like so many others, but not meeting the same fate as them.
<3 Thomas would've easily put babies before marriage but Luda Mae insisted that you two do it the traditional way and get married first.
<3 You were quick to win her over with your affinity to help out with cooking and other house chores. Especially when it came to taking care of her darling boy Thomas. She was thrilled he had found someone who loved him so much.
<3 In the Hewitt house hold with Monty and Charlie both breathing down your neck, it's easy to be reminded to leave the mans work to Thomas and just focus on helping Luda with whatever she needs.
<3 When you fall pregnant with the first baby, the whole house hold is thrilled.
<3 Luda, Charlie and Monty all never thought they would see the day that Thomas would continue the Hewitt family tree so it was a very big deal when you fell pregnant with Luda's first grandchild.
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"Now darlin' you know your not supposed to be doing anything in your state" Luda reprimanded as she walked into the kitchen to see you doing dishes.
"I know mama but laying in bed all day everyday is driving me nuts" You told her drying off a plate you were washing. Luda joined you at the sink grabbing a cup to wash it before handing it to you to dry.
"When I was pregnant with Charlie I almost got driven up a wall myself. Just don't let Tommy see, You'll never hear the end of it" She said giving you a small smile before heading back to the living room.
You stood at the sink and continued to wash until you heard familiar footsteps heading up the basement stairs, you tried to pretend like you weren't washing dishes but it was too late, Tommy was on you in an instant.
"Tommy hun it's ok!" You pleaded as he took the dishes out of your hands and herded you towards a chair. You couldn't help yourself but the laugh of how your giant husband could be turned so soft and attentive with you.
You grabbed Tommy's hands before he made you sit down and placed them onto your rounded belly. His eyes met yours instantly and your foreheads pressed together.
"Tommy we're fine, I promise honey." Tommy looked at you incredulously before rolling his eyes and huffing at you, you laughed. If there was one thing in this world Tommy couldn't say no too it was you.
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<3 Now Charles I could see being a bit different. Sure he adores having someone cleaning and cooking since he's out doing what a serial killer does most of the time but when it comes to kids he's a bit hesitant.
<3 He loves that you love to cook for him. It's nice having warm meals to come home too for once, Brownie points if their his favorite foods.
<3 Doesn't so much like when you get on him about tracking blood through the house or getting one too many stains on his clothes.
<3 If you really want a baby start telling him how lonely you are when he leaves for long periods of time to go kill people. He'll give you want you want as long as the baby stays out of his way.
<3 He'll be a good dad though don't get me wrong and he'll love the kid or kids just as much as you but he's a busy guy that's got shit to do so he mainly sees them as your responsibility.
<3 Might get jealous of all your attention going to the baby though, he understands it has too but that doesn't mean he has to be happy about it all the time.
<3 Your never going to be the picture perfect family but for your Charles will try his best to give you and the kids everything you'd ever need.
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"Charles! what have I told you about tracking blood in the house!" Your voice echoed through the house. You heard a muffled laugh as he rounded the hallway with your 3 month old in his arms.
"Babe I'm sorry, you know I never mean too sometimes it just happens" He said adjusting your bundle of joy in his arms.
"Whaddya think kid should mommy forgive me just this once?" He asked your child you babbled in response.
"You said just this once the last three times chuck" You deadpanned before breaking a smile when he did.
"Just a hazard of the job toots" He laughed, You joined him before your eyes were met with the deep red splotches on the blazer he was wearing.
His eyes followed yours before his froze and turned to walk away with the baby in tow as you yelled out behind him.
"Charles! The blood!"
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<3 The only inkling of what a normal family functions like that Michael has ever gotten was from his childhood, and to be honest I think his memories of that are very few and far between.
<3 You want to do what for him? Cook and clean ? why on earth would you want to do that for? Michael is confused.
<3 Though preparing to go out and finding a nice fresh out of the dryer jumpsuit all nice and warm and clean for him is quite nice. Michael thinks this is something he could get used to.
<3 On those late nights where he comes back late and finds plates of dinner wrapped in tinfoil ready for him to either heat up or eat just like that is also something he could get used too. It tastes way better then what he usually eats (Totally not dog, totally not)
<3 When kids get brought up though, it's a different story. I could honestly see him not really being all for it at least not at first.
<3 He's really like Charles but more so into the you can have kids as long as they stay far out of his way.
<3 His feelings towards them also aren't the most parental either. He loves them ? At least, Michael feels an emotion he could probably equate to love about them.
<3 But yeah I think for Michael it's best you just keep the kids clear of him. It's not easy when your father is the shape of Haddonfield.
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"Welcome home Mike!, your dinner is wrapped up on the counter love" You greeted him as he came home after a night of terrorizing the town. Placing a kiss to the cheek of his mask.
Michael nodded wordlessly, as always, and turned to go into the kitchen. Tonight you had made his favorite, or at least what you only thought was one of his favorites by the way he every so slightly changed reactions every time you made it.
You gave him a second before following him into the kitchen and sitting next to him at the island. You watched as he lifted his mask up for each bite of food before lowering it to chew.
You made the mistake of questioning him once as to why he didn't just take the mask off. It was early on in the relationship and his hand instinctively went to his knife before you even finished asking. That was how you learned it's better to just not ask Michael questions at least not about the mask.
The two of you sat in silence, a routine you repeated pretty much every night unless you were already asleep when he got home. You would spend all day cleaning and making sure everything was ship shape for him then you would greet your monster of a man when he came through your front door.
You were brought out of your thoughts when Michael's plate crashed into the sink and broke into pieces. Michael still didn't understand how to not hold the plate too high and just to sit it in the sink.
Looks like something you'll still have to work on. No one said the shape of Haddonfield was smart when it came to chores anyway.
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rosamundpkes · 9 months
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Hello!! A couple years ago I posted this tutorial for making gifs with a moving overlay effect. In the two and a half years since I made that tutorial, I've learned some new tricks for this gif effect but most importantly I've learned how to explain things better.
For that reason, I've created this new and improved tutorial for my overlay gif effect. The basics are the same but it's simpler, I go into more detail, give better explanations, and have more comprehensive instructions.
The easiest way to do this effect with this method is to use smart objects and work in timeline. For this tutorial, I’m assuming you know the basics of giffing like cropping, resizing, colouring, etc. If you need help with this I’d suggest you look at some other tutorials and guides!!
First, we’re going to start off with three things.
1. A completed gif converted into a smart object that is going to be the base gif. I'm going to call this "gif1". You’ll want this gif to be at least 3 seconds because it needs to last as long as the overlay plus a little bit of extra time in the beginning. This is the base gif I’ll be using in the example (except I trimmed it so that I could meet the size limit).
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2. A second completed gif converted into a smart object that is going to go over the base gif. We’re going to call this "gif2". This gif should be at least 2 seconds but I’ve made it work with shorter. Gif2 needs to be the same dimensions or bigger than gif1.  This is the gif I'll be using in the example (except I trimmed it so that I could meet the size limit).
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3. An overlay in video form. These can be found on tumblr and youtube by search for overlay or transition packs. For this example, I'll be using an ink drop overlay I found on youtube.
Step 1: Turning the overlay video into an overlay gif Most overlays aren’t going to instantly fit the gif effect you’re trying to achieve right away. This is the overlay I got from youtube and as you can see it’s too slow and needs a crop/resize to be usable.
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To fix it, I sped the frame rate up, cropped the overlay, and resized the overlay so it fits over my base gif. I also sharpened the overlay (500% amount, 0.3px radius) so that the edges were smooth. This is the new overlay gif and the one I’ll be using for the gif effect. 
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A tip: I also like to add a brightness/contrast layer to get rid of the grey on the overlay gif. Because we’re working with blending modes to achieve this effect, any parts of the overlay that are grey will be a blended mix of gif1 and gif2. If you think this will look good for your gif effect then don't worry about it!
Another tip: try to get the entire overlay movement to fit into a 2-3 second window. Anything longer than that will likely be cut off when you have to trim your gif to meet the upload size limit and it would suck to only have half of the overlay.
Step 2: Creating the gif effect Drag a copy of gif2 and a copy of the overlay gif onto the gif1 canvas. I like to use Ctrl+Shift+V so that the layers are pasted in the same position as they were on the previous canvas. MAKE SURE that both overlay layers are in the same position on the canvas. If one of the overlay layers is higher/lower/etc. than the other then the effect won't work properly.
Then, make a second copy of the overlay and invert it (Ctrl+i). These are the layers you should have:
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Before you go any further, trim gif2 and both overlay layers so they are all the same length.
Now, we need to rearrange the layers and set blending modes. The top layer should be whichever overlay goes from black to white. This is because when we change the blending modes, the white part of this layer will disappear and look like its being replaced by gif2. In this case, that is the overlay (inverted) layer. Then we want gif2, the other overlay layer, and then gif1.
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A tip: this process can be done the other way where the top layer is the overlay that goes from white > black however, you are much more likely to have an error where there is a grey/black line around the overlay effect in your final gif. In order to avoid that, I always use the black > white layer on top.
Next, set the top overlay layer to darken. You should only see the black part from the overlay and gif2 should fill in the white part. Here’s how that looks in my example. 
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Next, select the top overlay layer and gif2 and convert both layers into one smart object. Your layers tab should look like this now. 
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Now, set the new layer’s blending mode to lighten and the overlay layer’s blending mode to darken. Once you do this, you should be able to see gif1 as well as the overlay gif. 
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Step 3: Timeline and exporting At the moment, gif1 is still significantly longer than the overlay gifs. Since this gif is just over 10 mb (which is pretty small for this effect) I’m going to trim about 1/4 of a second off the end of gif1 and then drag the overlay layers so they all end at the same time. 
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Now you’re free to export the gif! This is the finished effect for the example gif! 
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A tip: sometimes, when I convert to from timeline to frames, the gif becomes a little longer and slower. It has to do with different frame rates across the videos and photoshop but I'm not smart enough to understand it. If that happens, just set all the frames with the overlay layers to 0.04 speed instead of 0.05.
And we're finished! I hope that was helpful and made sense. If you have any questions feel free to drop them in my inbox or send me a message!! <3
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imyourbratzdoll · 7 months
Text
𝒄𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒅𝒚 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒐𝒇…
hello! sorry for not posting anything in a while, I haven't had any motivation but this is an idea I've been thinking of for about a year now! I hope you all enjoy it.
summary - it's your first day working for the famous weatherman ari levinson, it turned out a lot better than you expected.
warning - smut, voyeurism, recording, daddy kink, choking, fingering, creampie, swearing, degrading, slut shaming, semi-public sex, powerplay.
18+ only please, the gif and headers I use aren't mine.
Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.
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You walk into the building, excitement building with each step. Your knee-length skirt rests tightly on your hips, cupping your arse wonderfully and your tucked-in, light purple blouse hugs your figure, barely containing your breasts from spilling out. Your heels click against the tile, and your heart squeezes inside your chest as you near the room. Your hand shook slightly as you reached for the handle, pushing the door open, your eyes widening as you took in the hustle. Everyone was moving fast, ensuring everything was getting done in time. 
Your breath catches in your throat when your eyes land on the infamous weatherman. The man every woman has wet dreams about, the man they’d happily get up early for just to see him on their screen. You watched as women fluttered around him, refreshing his make-up, to make him look perfect for the TV but that was impossible, he was already perfect enough. You felt your knickers dampen, slick gathering between your thighs, cunt throbbing as your eyes connected with his. It felt like you couldn’t breathe, you swear you were on the verge of a panic attack when he smirked, his eyes moving up and down your body slowly before he licked his lips. Ari Levinson was going to be the death of you and all womankind.
“Miss?” You blink, breaking eye contact with a god and shyly look at another man trying to get your attention. “Mr Levinson is ready for you. You will be training alongside him, so he said to meet him in the weather section.” You nod, happily but shyly follow along, keeping your head down so you don’t accidentally catch his eye again. The man stops in the area and shows you where you will be standing. A table is wheeled in and you grow confused, never seeing a table in this part of the news before. 
“What is the table for, if it’s not too much to ask?” You stare at it curiously, tilting your head to the side. 
The man shrugs before his hand flies to the earphone connected to his ear and he speaks to the person on the other side. He looks at you. “Mr Levinson will be here in a few seconds.” That’s all he says as he turns and leaves you to stand there by yourself. You look around, standing with your hands interlocked in front of you. 
You are so busy looking down at your shoes, getting lost in your own world that you don’t notice the man himself has made his way over. His navy blue suit hugged his figure perfectly, his shoes shined, and his medium-length hair was combed and pushed out of his face. “Good morning, Miss L/N” You jump, looking up with wide eyes as you notice he’s neared, standing so close that you can practically smell his cologne. “It’s a pleasure to have you here.” He reaches forward, expecting a handshake.
You stumble, quickly slipping your hand into his, feeling a shiver rush through your body as you make contact, his hand so warm and large. “G–good morning, Mr Levinson! It’s a pleasure to be working with you!” You stutter, spurting out words as you peer up at him through your lashes. Your chest heaving as his blue eyes stare down at you. “I–uh…” You look between him and the table. “May I ask what the table is for? I’ve never seen you use it in one of your reports.” You gulp, hoping that you haven’t disappointed him immediately. 
Ari smirks, his hand comes around and rests on your lower back, leading you over to the table in speaking. “I have something special planned for this one. You, my little costar. Will be my special guest.” He smiles down at you, something darker behind his eyes. You didn’t know, but the moment Ari had seen you in the interview, he knew he needed to have you any way he could and he planned something so naughty, so sexual that the whole world would talk about it. “You don’t mind, do you, sweetness?”
“N–no! I don’t mind at all, Mr Levinson! I am just honoured to be working with you! You see, I am a big fan!” You blink up at him, wondering how he could be even more perfect up close. “I will do anything to make this perfect!” Ari’s grin widens, and you shift as he continues to stare. “I–is there something on my face, Mister?” 
Ari shakes his head and moves away from you, he runs his hand through his hair and gets in position. “No, sweetness. Now, be a good girl and stand behind the table for me.” He gestures, watching with lustful eyes as you obey immediately. He holds back a groan as his gaze falls to your arse, loving how the skirt hugs it so perfectly. Ari blinks and his face becomes straight, his eyes move from your plump arse to the cameraman, and he gives a slight nod, showing that he is ready. Once he gets the signal, he begins. “Good morning everyone! I am your weatherman Ari Levinson and I have a special guest with me today! Please welcome, Miss Y/n L/n!” 
You smile shyly, giving a small wave and you feel your body heat up as Ari takes a step closer to you, brushing up against you. “H–hi!” You clear your throat and straighten your back, wanting to be seen as a professional instead of some shy little girl. 
Ari’s hand brushes against your hip, and you swallow down the whimper that threatens to escape. A giddy geek by the name of Jake Jensen stands behind the camera, anticipating what's to come. He was amazed at how Ari could work his looks and money, being able to persuade everyone in the building to leave to let him do the weather announcement without them. He trusts his good friend to stream this live video to the house filled with the other group of friends. All the men gather around the couch, waiting for his friend to bless them with a good show. 
Ari presses against you, his bulge resting between your plump cheeks and you let out a small whine. “Why don’t you tell our audience what the weather will be like today, okay, sweetness?” You gulp, blinking a few times as you try and pull yourself back from the fuzziness. His hand comes up and he strokes your cheek with his knuckles, “You there, sweetness?” 
You nod, sighing softly. “Y–yes, I’m here. Uh, the weather today is said to be cloudy with a–a…” You stop, eyes widening when you feel Ari begin to grind against you, his hand sliding to the front of you, slowly pulling your skirt up. 
He leans forward, whispering in your ear. “Keep going, You wouldn’t want to lose your job on your first day, now would you?” 
You immediately shake your head, continuing as he connects with your bare cunt, groaning when he realises you’ve been walking around wearing nothing underneath. “With a chance of rain…” You clear your throat, biting hard on your bottom lip when his finger brushes against your soft, glistening cunt. A squeal escapes you when you are suddenly bent forward, your chest flush against the cold table, nipples hardening and slick gathers between your thighs. “W–what, what are you doing, Mr Levinson?” You whimper, feeling him grind into you.
“Shh, sweetness. This is what’s so special about this one. You should’ve known that I wouldn’t let someone like you slip from my grasp. I had to have you, and so do my friends.” He leans over you, your body practically disappearing with his large build, and Ari looks directly into the camera. “Say hi to them sweetness.” His other hand slides up and tightens around your throat, squeezing when you don’t obey. “I said, say hi to them. Don’t be a disobedient slut.”
Your eyes roll into the back of your head, a whine passing your lips as he continues to rub your swollen clit. “H–hi, Mr Levinson’s friends!” Your mind felt cloudy, never having felt this much pleasure before. “W–what are you going to do, Mr Levinson?” Your arse pushes back against him as his fingers slip into your hole, pumping fast and hard, curling them into that sweet spot you’ve never been able to reach. 
“Call me Daddy, sweetness, and don’t even worry your pretty little head about what I’m going to do.” His cock throbs in his slacks, hardening and straining against the material. Ari presses harder against you, fucking you with his fingers and groaning as you tighten around them. You whine as Ari pulls his fingers out of you, and your orgasm which had been close to the edge, fades away. “You don’t get to cum, sweetness, unless it’s around my cock. You wanna cum on Daddy’s cock?” 
You nod rapidly, grinding yourself against him, wanting him buried deep inside of you. “Yes! Please, Daddy, I wanna cum on your cock!” You gasp as his hand moves from your throat, his thumb rests on your plump bottom lip and a groan slips from Ari as you immediately wrap your lips around his thumb, sucking and licking, eyes dazed as his taste fills your mouth. 
Ari lifts the fingers that were inside you to his face and sticks them into his mouth, moaning at the taste of you. “Taste so good, sweetness. I can’t wait to be buried between these thighs.” He reaches down, slowly pulling out his thickened cock, smirking as you whine and wiggle in anticipation. “But, I won’t today. I’ll save that for another day. For now, sweetness. You need to be patient, I’ll fuck you in a second.” He growls, smacking your arse, and his cock twitches as he watches it jiggle. 
“P–please, Daddy! I’ll be good, please fuck me!” You whimper, pushing your arse against his throbbing cock, and your skirt now rests above your hips. Ari slowly strokes his cock, tapping his leaking tip against your glistening folds, rubbing it through until his head gets caught on your entrance. 
“It’s okay, sweetness. Daddy will fuck you now.” Your eyes roll into the back of your head and a strained moan escapes you when he begins to push in, stretching your walls. “Fuck, you’re so fucking tight, sweetness. I’m never letting you go after this, oh– You’re squeezing my cock so well.” Ari grunts, thrusting fully into your cunt, gripping your hips as he begins to fuck you hard and fast, becoming feral the more his cock drives into you. “Feel good, sweetness?” 
“Uh huh, uh huh! So good, so full!” You scream, gripping the table as your body moves up and down with each thrust. “Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!” Your moans echo throughout the room, your walls tighten around his thick member, and for the first time in your life, your toes curl. The men watching groan, pants tightened as their cocks strain against them. Your knuckles grow white as you grip harder, feeling your walls pulsate around Ari.
“Jesus, fuck! Sweetness, if you continue to squeeze me like that, I’ll finish inside you.” Ari groans as you squeeze him tighter at his words, the thought of him pumping you full causes your whole body to go crazy. “You’re such a slut, sweetness. Your first day on the job and you are already sleeping with your boss while his friends watch. You know how much of a whore that makes you? I bet you want them to be here, passing you around and using you.” You let out a pornographic moan at the thought, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as his cock begins to pound into your sweet spot. 
“Daddy, I’m cumming! Please let me cum! Can I cum, please?!” You cry out, thrusting your hips back against him, wanting to feel him deeper. Your head feels fuzzy, eyes cloudy and the core inside of you tightens. “Please, please!” 
Ari grips your hips tightly, pounding faster and harder, feeling his orgasm approaching rapidly. “Cum for me, sweetness. Milk my cock.” He growls in your ear as he leans forward, fucking you deeper. “C’mon be a good girl and show my friends how well you obey orders.” Your mouth falls open into a silent scream, your walls pulsate like crazy and your juices squirt out of you, coating Ari’s cock with white cream. You sigh, planting your face onto the table as he continues to fuck you. “Fuck, that was so fucking hot, sweetness!” 
Ari holds you tighter, hard enough to leave bruises on your soft flesh. “I’m going to pump you full, sweetness, and then carry you home to my friends so they can all have a turn with your sweet body.” He whispers into your ear, grunting as he feels his balls tighten, cock twitching and throbbing before thick spurts of cum shoot out of his thick mushroom tip and into you, filling you to the brim, coating your walls. “Jesus, you feel so good, sweetness. Let’s see how pretty your cunt looks filled with my cum.” Ari groans and you whine as he slowly pulls his softened cock out of your used hole, and squats down. “Oh, sweetness. She’s so beautiful!” 
You whimper as his finger connects with your puffy clit, rubbing it gently before he moves down and spreads your lips apart. A groan slips from his lips as he watches his cum slowly begin to leak out of your hole. You gasp as Ari slowly pushes a finger into your hole, pushing his cum back into you, deeper. “You know what the best part of this will be, sweetness?”
You hum, too fucked out to understand. “The fact that you aren’t wearing any knickers, means you’ll be walking out of here with my cum dripping down your thigh.” You let out a little whine, wiggling against him as he continues to finger his cum back into you. Ari stands, straightening his back as he tucks himself back into his slacks and ensures his suit looks perfect. “I hope you had a good show, boys. Now, sweetness. Let’s get you dressed so that I can introduce you to my friends.” 
“I’m so tired…” You mumble, nuzzling your face into his neck when he stands you up and spins you around, giving everyone a view of your arse before Jake turns the camera off. Ari grins, pulling your skirt down gently to cover your gorgeous legs. One hand rests on your hip while the other comes up and fixes your shirt. You slowly pull away from his neck and blink tiredly up at him, feeling all tingly and sore between your legs, having never taken someone so large before. “So pretty.” 
Ari smiles, tucking a strand of hair that’s come loose behind your ear. “Thank you, sweetness. You’re the most beautiful woman that’s walked this Earth.” His eyes fall to your plump lips, wondering what it would feel like to feel them against his. This man had taken you, yet not once had he stolen a kiss. Your eyes follow suit, flickering down to his lips, willing him to kiss you. A gasp leaves your lips when Ari leans down, holding your chin between his thumb and finger and kisses you, swallowing the soft sounds that escape you. Your hands clutch onto his suit jacket, holding him close to you as your lips move in unison, his taste is so delicious and magical.
You whimper when he pulls away, his and your eyes flutter open and you stare at each other for a short while before you stumble, your mind cloudy from the kiss and legs feel like jelly and Ari smirks. “Why don’t I carry you out, sweetness? It looks like I did a good job, just wait until you get to my house.” You whine at the thought of being filled by multiple different cocks. Ari leans slightly and grabs your thighs, he lifts you and wraps your legs around his hips. “Are you ready, sweetness?”
You nod, nuzzling into him more. “I’m ready.” 
With those words, you are off. He carries you out to your new future, one where you will no longer have to work and be worshipped by many men. Fate had a funny way of getting you to meet your soulmates, and a certain cameraman by the name of Jake Jensen was known as a geek, being smart enough to know everything about tech. Except today, he had been so invested in you and your beauty that he didn’t notice he accidentally switched the live recording to broadcast to the world instead of just his buddies.
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footiehoefics · 7 months
Text
Chose to be friends, meant to be lovers
gif: @bracedes
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Hi guys! I've been working on this fic for a little while. It is the longest I've ever done but I always say the longer the better (lol). Let me know any feedback you have and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it! :) 7.0k words, TW none, Angst/Fluff, tags: @nightlockcornucopia
Y/N
“You know…Mason will probably be there tonight.” your friend said, smirking at you. To be honest you were not paying much attention to whatever she was saying, too concentrated on applying mascara. 
“Y/n did you hear me?” Aliyah said, waving her wand in front of your face. “Stop, you will ruin my makeup” you said giggling. “Sorry, yes I heard you.” You replied, closing the mascara tube and placing it where it belonged. You noticed Aliyah was still staring at you. 
“Can I help you?” you asked confused as to why she was still staring at you. Although you know why she was staring at you. “I said Mason will probably be there.” she said again. “Yea he probably will be so?” you said trying to sound unbothered. 
“Sooo…are you like gonna try and shoot your shot finally?” she said, leaning towards you smiling and waiting for your reaction. You rolled your eyes at her statement. “Will you stop with that please?” you said standing up. “Oh come on Y/n I know you better than anyone I know you’ve been falling for him HARD lately.” She was not wrong, you hated that she was not wrong. 
You tried to distract yourself by searching for an outfit in your closet. “Am I wrong?” Aliyah said, again bringing you back to earth. “Aliyah, please,” you said, more annoyed. She was not wrong; however, you know that the possibility of Mason having feelings for you was near 0. 
You had met Mason through a mutual friend at a party. It turned out you had a lot of friends in common and you started seeing him more often at parties or dinners. Of course, when you met him you knew who he was. You could not avoid the big murals for him around London. That and also, you could not avoid his radiant personality. He was charming, always with a smile on his face, and chatted to everyone. He was just a nice human being, very funny and of course, very dreamy. He was probably the most beautiful man you had ever met. 
At first, you and he were not close. Not because he didn’t try to talk to you. You were very shy. Social interactions, the majority of the time, make you feel awkward. Meeting someone new was hell for you, it was hard for you to just have a natural conversation without feeling self-conscious.  He became really good friends with your friend group, hence why you got more comfortable around him as time went by. You loved the way he would include you in conversations, try and get your opinion at times where you were not really talking. 
Fast forward a year later, you and him talked almost on a daily basis. You two were close but you always refrained yourself a little bit. You had noticed how he was always touchy with everyone, he loved to have his arm around someone while talking, hugging everyone. You knew if that man showed you even the slightest bit of affection, you would crumble. You already liked him physically and his personality. All of that combined with his love language would make you fall harder than you already have. 
It's not that he would never hug you or touch you, but you always told yourself “he does this with everyone, it does not mean anything with you.” Sometimes you did pull away and felt bad after the fact because he would look upset. 
“Y/n! I’m your best friend, why won’t you just admit it to me?” Aliyah asked with a pout. “Because there is nothing to admit, okay? We are friends and that is all we’ll ever be.” You closed your closet door and headed to the bathroom to get changed. 
Once inside, you shut the door, and rested against it, closing your eyes. You didn’t think it was that obvious you liked him. You really thought you were hiding it very well. You didn’t like when people tried to figure out if you like someone or tease you about it. It made you uncomfortable and it also made you act differently towards the person you have feelings for. 
You got dressed and looked at yourself in the mirror. You liked what you saw, and hoped Mason did too. Were you trying to look good for him? Yes. Would he say something about it? Maybe, but he probably would say the same thing about another friend. 
Once you stepped out, Aliyah looked at you smirking. “I think Mr. Mount will like it” she said, wiggling her eyebrows making you laugh. “See you're laughing!” she exclaimed. “I’m laughing because you are so annoying and weird.” You said in between laughs. “Yea right y/n.” 
You stopped again to look in the mirror hanging behind the bedroom door. “Y/n, you look great. I promise. And I mean it, Mason will like it.” Aliyah assured you hugging you from behind. “I love you.” You said smiling at her. “Well, I love you more. Ready then?” “Yes, I’m ready.” Both of you grabbed your purses and headed out to the car. 
Once you arrived at the party, two of your friends were already waiting for you at the door with drinks. “C’mon drink up, you guys have to catch up!” your friend Harry exclaimed. “Oh Jesus” you murmured to yourself, dreading the sting this shot of alcohol would cause.  You grabbed the shot glass, placed it in your mouth and threw your head back to drink it as fast as possible. 
Aliyah wiped her mouth and yelped at the flavor of the tequila. “Okay then, this will be your confidence boost to go talk to him.” She whispered in your ear making you giggle. 
Honestly, alcohol sometimes did that to you. It made you more social but in the mornings, you would end up regretting it. 
You walked inside and the place was packed. It was a house party, although right now it did not look remotely close to a house. You could not spot a single piece of furniture since it was so packed. 
“Oh God, finding everyone here will be hell.” Aliya stated, almost shouting because of the loud music, at you. 
Once you got through the swarm of people, you managed to reach the door that led to the back yard. When you stepped outside, you took in a big breath. It felt like there was no oxygen inside the house from the amount of people in there. 
Lucky you, Ben, Kai, Sophia, and all your other friends were outside drinking and hanging out. “Wow you guys made it through no man’s land” Ben said as he spotted you, Aliyah, Harry, and your other friend Nicolas. You all laughed at his comment. 
You all got settled in the outdoor furniture and started talking, laughing, and drinking. You didn’t spot Mason anywhere, not even when you were walking inside the house. You started looking around, trying to spot him but nothing. After 30 minutes, you decided to go inside to get another drink, well that’s what you told your friend. In reality you wanted to see if you could spot Mason. 
Squished between all those people, you could barely see anything. It started getting hot for you, you felt sweat on your forehead and your neck. You didn’t know if it was someone else's sweat or yours at this point. 
You couldn’t get past everyone to go back outside so you decided to head towards the bathroom. You wanted to tidy up, go back out and go around the house to the backyard. 
Once you reached the bathroom door, you opened it and saw your worst nightmare. Mason. With a girl. Kissing.
“Oh shit, um I’m so sorry!” you panicked and slammed the door closed. You stayed there frozen in your spot for a little bit. You were trying to get that image out of your head, but you couldn’t. Mason was against the sink, his arms firm on the sink. The girl had her arms wrapped around his neck and her lips on his. 
You couldn’t tell who the girl was. I mean how could you, you saw a microsecond of it and shut the door. And the microsecond you saw was her face mushed into his. 
You snapped out of your thoughts when you heard the doorknob of the bathroom moving indicating someone was opening the door. You moved away from the door and panicked, not knowing if staying waiting for him and her to come out was better than just running and pretending you never saw anything. 
Mason opened the door and saw the look of panic and shock in your face. He was about to say something when the girl stepped out behind him. 
You couldn’t believe it. You knew Mason was a lady���s guy, everyone knew that. You knew he would hook up with people, it hurt but what could you do? You were just his friend. You knew the type of girls he would hook up with, but you never thought he would go so low as to hook up with her. Alice. 
Alice was the only person in Mason’s friend group that never liked you and she made it clear by showing no interest in you. She would never talk to you, every time you said anything in a group conversation, she would roll her eyes. Aliyah always said it was because Mason was always with you at gatherings, and she felt jealous, part of you thought the same thing but why? You and Mason were just friends. 
You would always tell Mason how Alice never tried with you. He would always say you should try and talk to her to figure out why, but you never did. Well, you intended to but once you wanted to start the conversation, she shut you down. She made you feel like an idiot and said a lot of hurtful things. 
Of course, you told Mason, and he was furious. You told him not to do anything about it. Although not doing anything about it did not mean going out with her. 
It hurt regardless of who the girl was, but the fact that it was Alice hurt even more. He knew how shitty she made you feel. He knew and had witnessed her being crap to you. Yet here he was making out with her. 
“Sorry the bathroom was unlocked so I just opened it, I should’ve knocked.” Your voice was shaky, you felt like the waterfall of tears was threatening to fall. “Yea you should have.” Alice said, annoyed. You looked at her, then at Mason. Mason was red in the face and looked worried. 
You couldn’t bear the sight of them so you started heading towards the front door. 
“Hey Y/n, wait up!” you heard Mason from behind, but you were not in the mood to have that conversation right now. 
You felt him grab your arm once you got to the front door. “Y/n please listen-“
“Mason don’t, sorry I interrupted your time with her.”
“Y/n I’m so sorry, I know it looks bad-“
“You think?” you asked sarcastically, interrupting him again. 
He looked around, opened the door and pulled you outside with him. 
“Listen, I’m sorry, I was trying to take her to the kitchen because-“
“Mason please, stop. I don’t care what you two were going to do. You know, more than anyone, how shit of a person she is, especially with me, and you go and make out with her?” You didn’t mean to raise your voice, but you were hurt. You know you had no right to be mad at him for making out with someone but, your feelings were taking over your brain. 
“Okay, yes I understand, I know how she is, I promise kissing her was not what I wanted to happen, but why are you getting so mad?” he asked, taken back at your rage. 
“I mean, regardless of who it was, I don’t understand why you are so mad, you’re not my girlfriend.”  he said, making your face drop. 
Ouch. 
“Yea I’m not Mason but I’m your friend, right? And that is a slap in the face. What would you do if you found me making out with Nicolas?” you asked. 
Nicolas was one of your friends that didn’t vibe with Mason at all. You tried to brush it off but sometimes it was too visible. Mason had told you he didn’t like him, and vice versa with Nicolas. You tried to ignore them on that matter and just encourage them to talk to each other to settle their differences.
“That is different Y/n…” Mason replied. 
“Is it though?” you asked, raising your eyebrow.  
You didn’t want to keep harping on the subject. Yes you were not his girlfriend, but you wish you were. Now most definitely you would never be. 
You felt dumb and pathetic. You spent almost 2 hours getting ready to look beautiful and for him to maybe say something only for this to happen.  
You walked away from him to the main gate. You wanted to leave, not only because you saw what you saw but you knew emotions were getting the best of you and tears were filling your eyes. You didn’t want to make a scene at a party. 
You heard footsteps following you, and when you turned around you figured you would see Mason but it was Nicolas. 
“Hey hey where are you going?” he asked. Tears had already fallen and you looked hurt. 
“Hey, I’m um-“ you tried to get the words out but you choked on a sob. 
“It’s okay, I’m here.” Nicolas said, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you into a hug. 
You hugged him back. You didn’t care if it was him, you were hurt. 
You heard footsteps approaching and you figured it was maybe Aliyah, but you were surprised to see Mason again. 
“Nicolas, can I talk to her alone please.” Mason said sternly. 
Nicolas looked at you, then at him, and back at you. He put two and two together, realizing he was the person who hurt you. 
“What the fuck did you Mason?” Nicolas asked angrily. 
“It’s none of your fucking business, okay? I need to talk to Y/n, alone, so please fuck off.” Mason replied stone cold. 
You didn’t want this to get more heated so you intervened. 
“Stop, okay? I’m fine, I’ll just go home-“
“I’ll drop you off” Nicolas interrupted you, still not glancing away from Mason. 
“I think it’s better if I do, we need to talk-“ Mason tried to say. 
“I’m getting an uber so stop, both of you. I’m ordering it right now.” You said pulling out your phone not wanting to entertain any more bullshit. 
“I’ll wait here with you for the uber.” Mason stated 
“Me too.” Nicolas said, turning to you.
You rolled your eyes at how childish they were being. You waited about 10 minutes for your uber. 10 awkward minutes of silence. Once you finally saw a car approaching the house, you were grateful. 
You didn’t hug either of them goodbye, you just got in and left. 
Mason
Mason did not want to be at the party. He was ready to call it an early night, maybe ring you and ask if you wanted to go to his to watch a movie and order food. 
He was not in the mood to drink, party and definitely not in the mood to take care of drunk friends. He had a rough week filled with physios and meetings. 
However, Woody ended up convincing him. How? By stating you were going. Mason had developed feelings for you, this had been going on for a while, now that you two were much closer. 
He loved everything about you, but he couldn’t help but notice you sometimes pushed him away a bit. He didn’t know why, he had never given you a reason to. He tried to brush it off, but now that you two always talked and would always hang out, he wanted nothing more than to be more touchy with you and you resisted it sometimes. He knew you didn’t feel the same way, and it hurt him. 
Once at the party, Mason started scanning the sea of people to see if he could spot you. He couldn’t find you anywhere, so he went outside where all his friends were and asked Sophia if she had seen you. 
“No she’s not here yet, I think she and Aliyah were on their way.” She responded smiling. 
Mason thanked her and went back inside. He spotted Woody with some girls, of course. Once Woody saw Mason, he approached him smiling. “Mate I need your help.” Woody pleaded. “What do you want?” “I met this girl, she’s the one in the blue navy dress, see?” Mason moved his head a bit to see who she was. “Yea I see, what do you want me to do?” Mason asked, confused. “I need you to take Alice somewhere else, I want to be alone with her but she came with Alice so they are attached to the hip.” Mason rolled his eyes. “Mason c’mon, I’m not asking you to do anything with her I know you are waiting for your princess.” Woody said, teasing Mason, making him smile. “I’ll take her to the kitchen so she can talk to other people but if she comes back, it’s not my fault.”  Mason stated, moving towards Alice. 
Alice was always very flirty with Mason, and a lot of his friends knew that she had feelings for him. He didn’t want her to get the wrong impression. 
“Hey Alice, why don’t we go to the kitchen and get a drink?” Mason asked, immediately regretting it. She was visibly drunk, and he had just offered to give her even more alcohol. “Masey, hey of course!” she slurred. 
Alice grabbed his hand and dragged him to the kitchen where all the mixers and bottles were. She poured a drink for her and him with way too much alcohol. Mason was trying to get her to talk to everyone, but she was being very touchy with him. Grabbing his hand, rubbing the back of his neck when they were talking to someone else. He wished it was you doing that, not her. 
Shit. If you saw him right now with Alice all touchy and handsy, he knew you would get mad. He knew you despised her, and she despised you. 
Alice pulled him out of his thoughts. “Mason, can we go to the bathroom?” Hell no he thought. “Um, what do you need? Are you going to be sick?” he asked nervously. “Yea” she said, almost hanging from him. Mason sighed and agreed. He was almost carrying her to the bathroom. He didn’t want her to be sick in front of everyone. He didn’t like her, but he had to be a good person. 
Once inside the bathroom, Mason closed the door without locking it. 
“Okay, do you want me to hold your hair or do you have like a pony tail so your hair doesn’t get dirty?” he asked, and once he turned around he saw Alice just smirking at him. 
“Mase, seriously?” she said, almost laughing. 
Mason gulped. He didn’t want to be in this situation right now. 
“You know something I’ve always wanted to ask you?”
Mason looked nervous and confused. 
“Do you find me attractive?” she asked, batting her eyelashes at him and getting closer. 
“I mean, every girl is beautiful.” He said. 
Alice was very pretty, Mason knew that. But he never saw her as something else. Especially now that he had feelings for you. 
Alice got closer to him, and he backed away but stopped once he reached the sink. His hands were firm on the sink not wanting to do anything that might look like something else to her. 
“Mase c’mon, aren’t you like a lady’s man?” she asked, smirking. She was now closer, her hand around his neck.
He didn’t know what to do. He could perfectly smell the mix of perfume and alcohol. 
Without hesitation she leaned in and kissed him. He was taken back and didn’t stop it. He was frozen but the kiss didn’t last long. 
Someone came in and swung the bathroom door open. Mason pulled away quickly, trying to compose himself. Why did he just let her do that? Alice just pulled away laughing. 
Mason rolled his eyes at her. He grabbed the doorknob to open the door. 
Once he opened the door, he saw you. He didn’t know it had been you who had walked in just now. He was as shocked as you were. 
“Sorry the bathroom was unlocked so I just opened it, I should’ve knocked.” you said with a shaky voice. 
Mason felt horrible. He knew what he did was wrong. He wasn’t thinking about how you would feel at that moment, but to be fair he couldn’t think about anything. His mind froze. 
Alice stepped out of the bathroom a second later. “Yea you should have” Alice said, pulling out her lip-gloss from her purse and reapplying it. 
Mason saw you walking away from the scene and shouted at you to wait up. He wanted to explain everything. You wouldn’t stop walking and once he saw you reach the front door, he grabbed your arm to stop you. 
“Y/n please listen-“ he tried to say
“Mason don’t, sorry I interrupted your time with her.”
“Y/n I’m so sorry, I know it looks bad-“
“You think?” she interrupted him again . 
He looked around, opened the door and pulled you outside with him. 
“Listen, I’m sorry, I was trying to take her to the kitchen because-“
“Mason please, stop. I don’t care what you two were going to do. You know, more than anyone, how shit of a person she is, especially with me, and you go and make out with her?” you said, raising your voice. 
Mason knew what he did was bad, but he didn’t think you get this pissed off and emotional about it. Part of him hoped it was because there were some feelings involved but he didn’t know. 
“Okay, yes I understand, I know how she is, I promise kissing her was not what I wanted to happen, but why are you getting so mad?” he asked, taken back at your rage. 
“I mean, regardless of who it was, I don’t understand why you are so mad, you’re not my girlfriend.”  he said, making your face drop. 
He regretted saying it instantly. He didn’t mean for it to sound bitchy. He just wanted to get to the bottom of it. He wanted to know what you felt. Did you have feelings for him the same way he did with you?
“Yea I’m not Mason but I’m your friend, right? And that is a slap in the face. What would you do if you found me making out with Nicolas?” you asked. 
Mason hated him. Why? He knew and he could tell he had feelings for you. He also hated the fact that he had more confidence with you. Ever since Mason met him, they didn’t like each other but it was more of an unspoken thing. 
“That is different Y/n…” Mason replied. 
“Is it though?” you asked, raising your eyebrow at Mason. 
Y/N
Once you thanked your uber, you got out of the car and rushed to your front door. The whole drive back to your place your sobs were almost coming out of your mouth. 
You don’t know who you were madder at, him or yourself. 
Why on earth did you think he could feel the same way you did about him? Why? You were just friends. He was him. He was way out of your league. Why were you dumb enough to think you could end up with someone like him? 
All these thoughts plagued your mind while you were taking your makeup off. Removing the makeup revealed the redness on your face from crying. 
You washed your face to try and compose yourself, but all you could think about was that horrible image of Mason kissing her. 
He was right, you weren’t his girlfriend so why were you so mad? Alice is a good reason, but you were more jealous than mad. But how the hell would you tell him “Oh yea I’m mad because it’s not me you’re kissing, it’s her.”
After doing your skin care, you decided to just go to bed and try to get some sleep. At the end of the day, you could not let this ruin your life. It’s just a boy, that’s what you told yourself the whole night “it’s just a boy”, the problem was he was the perfect one. 
The next day, you were thankful you left early from the party. You were not in the mood to deal with a hangover. 
You did your normal morning routine, but also went in and checked on Aliyah. You knocked on her door, no answer. You knocked again, nothing. 
You opened the door and saw a sight you never thought you would see. Aliyah and a guy in her bed. Thankfully, they were covered, and nothing was out in the air. You giggled to yourself and closed the door. 
It was a free day so you decided to clean up a bit around the apartment and make yourself a yummy breakfast. After an hour had passed, Aliyah and the guy came out of their room. Her cheeks were bright pink and you could tell the guy felt awkward, scratching the back of neck. 
You couldn’t help but laugh at the sight. “Oh, shut up y/n” Aliya said, rolling her eyes. You laughed more and introduced yourself to the guy whose name was Andrew. “Well, it is nice to meet you, I cleaned up a bit around because I knew we had a guest over.” You said trying to tease Aliyah and making her laugh. 
They said their goodbyes and both of you sat down on the living room sofa. “Good night then?” you asked, taking a sip of your tea and raising your eyebrows. “Amazing” Aliyah responded, making you chuckle. 
“What about you? Nicolas said you left kind of early, what happened?” It all came back to you; all of the events from the night before. You had done a pretty good job at hiding it and not thinking much about it but now that Aliyah asked you couldn’t hide it anymore. 
You opened your mouth to say something but were quickly cut off with tears pouring out of your eyes. “Oh honey! What happened?” Aliyah asked now concerned and pulled you in a hug. You hugged her back tightly, just wanting to cry the emotions out. 
Once you had cried for a bit, you pulled away and tried to articulate everything. 
You told Aliyah everything. How she had always been right in saying you had feelings for him, how you dressed up yesterday for him, how you saw him kissing Alice, what he said to you afterwards and how mad you were at yourself for being so pathetic. 
“Hey stop it! You are not pathetic! You are allowed to feel sort of betrayed by him. And, you are allowed to have feelings for him and try to impress him. There is nothing wrong with that.” She said comforting you, rubbing your arm. 
“Babe, why didn’t you tell me when it happened? I would’ve come home with you and talked about it.” “No, no, I just wanted to be alone. Nicolas found me crying and I didn’t tell him either but he knew it had something to do with Mason and was mad.” You said remembering Nicolas had waited for you to get in the uber as well. 
“I mean duh, of course he would be mad. He has feelings for you.” Aliyah said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “What?” you asked, confused. “What?” “You just said he has feelings for me?” Aliya rolled her eyes at your question. “You are so naïve sometimes, oh my God.” “Aliyah, he has never said anything.” “I mean he doesn’t have to, it’s obvious. Also, why do you think he doesn’t really vibe with Mason?” Everything Aliyah was saying started making sense. “I guess it could be true…?” 
Both of you spent the day on the sofa catching up on a series you started watching the week prior. You were both caught up on it, but the doorbell made you both look at each other. “Did you order anything?” you asked, thinking maybe she had ordered some food and it was the food delivery guy. Aliyah stood up to open up and replied with a no. 
Once she opened the front door, you both saw Nicolas standing there with some flowers. 
“Hello you!” Aliya said, hugging him. “How was your night?” he said, raising his eyebrows, he clearly knew what Aliya had been up to. “Well, obviously better than yours.” She said laughing. 
Nicolas stepped in the apartment and saw you curled up in the sofa, making his heart melt. “Hey Nic” you said smiling, standing up to greet him. He smiled and hugged you. “Whose are these for?” you asked confused. “Well, um they are for you.” He said shyly. You could see Aliya had that “I told you” look on her face. 
“I’m going to go take a shower and leave you guys” Aliyah stated rushing back upstairs to her room to give you both privacy. 
“Oh wow, why?” you asked, smiling a little. “Well, I wanted you to feel better after last night.” You started blushing. “Thank you, you didn’t have to.” You took the flowers and placed them on the kitchen counter. “I’m going to add water and put them in a vase, thank you.” “No worries.” 
You offered him some tea, he accepted and both of you sat in the living room talking. 
You liked Nicolas, he had been your friend since your first year of college. But you never saw him as something else. Honestly, maybe you should. However, you didn’t want it to turn into something just because you want to get over Mason. You respected him enough to not do that to him. Once you chatted for about an hour, you thanked him again for the flowers and said your goodbyes.  
You cleared up the tea mugs and were about to go upstairs until the doorbell rang again. 
You opened the door, and this was a sight you were not expecting to see. Mason. With flowers in his hand and a card. 
You both just stood there for a moment without saying anything, frankly you didn’t know what to say. He broke the silence, “Can I come in?” he asked. 
You stepped out of the way so he could come in. Once you both reached the living room and kitchen area you immediately regretted letting him in. The flowers Nicolas brought you were still on the kitchen counter in full display. 
Mason stopped in his tracks, taken back. His mind had a million thoughts going through his head. Were they yours or Aliyah’s? If they were yours, who gave them to you? 
“Did someone beat me to it?” he said, chuckling a bit, trying to cut the tension. He was hoping you would answer they were not yours, but his face dropped when you answered. “Um, kind of” you said, chuckling nervously. “Oh, I thought they might have been Aliyah's.” he said, whispering the last part to himself. 
“Can I ask, whose are they from?” Mason asked, dreading the answer. “Nicolas.” You spoke. 
This made Mason’s blood boil. Why would Nicolas bring you flowers? What did he want from you? Mason placed the flowers and the card on the kitchen counter. 
“Why did he bring you flowers?” he asked, annoyed. This now annoyed you. You didn’t owe him any explanation, especially after last night. 
“Why do you care?” you snapped. Mason looked at you with rage. “Just, because” he replied, trying to keep his voice calm. 
“Oh, well you’re not my boyfriend so why are you so mad?” you asked, satisfied with giving him a bit of his own medicine. 
All this tension had even made both of you forget his flowers and the reasoning behind it. Mason’s face dropped, and it gave you a weird feeling in your tummy. You didn’t want to hurt him, but after last night and how he was being right now he deserved it. 
“You know what, I came here to apologize and explain what happened last night but honestly fucking forget it.” He said scratching the back of neck frustrated with the whole situation. He didn’t say anything else and just left. 
You don’t know why you wanted to cry. You knew you hurt him with that comment, but he hurt you too. 
You went upstairs and instead of going straight to your bed, you knocked on Aliyah’s door. “Come in!” you heard from the other side of the door. 
You stepped in the room with tears in your eyes. “What the fuck happened? I thought it was a good thing what Nicolas did?” She pulled you in a hug yet again trying to comfort you. 
“Fuck, I feel so lame I’m crying over a boy.” You said sniffing and pulling away from her. You wiped the tears from your face. “Mason came by after Nicolas left.” “What!? What did he say?”
“Not much, he brought me flowers and a card as well, he saw the flowers Nicolas bought for me and got annoyed, started asking who gave them to me and I said Nic and he got even more annoyed, and then I said the same comment he told me yesterday, got mad and left.” You said, grabbing a Kleenex that Aliyah handed to you. 
“Babe this is like a rom com,” Aliyah said, chuckling to herself. “you’re like in a love triangle who would’ve thought.” She said teasingly trying to cheer you up. “C’mon Aliyah.” “Y/n I’m serious! Why else would Mason be mad that Nic got you flowers? They despise each other because they both have feelings for you. Damn, how are you so smart yet so naive?” she asked herself. 
You thought about it for a second, it made sense but at the same time why would Mason have feelings for you. 
“Wait, did you read the card?” Aliyah said, interrupting your thoughts. 
“No, it’s downstairs.” You said. Aliyah jumped out of bed and ran downstairs to go and get the card. She came back panting from running up the stairs. “Okay well then, read it, maybe it will give you more clarity.” She said handing the card to you. 
You opened the card and saw Mason’s handwriting.
“I don’t even know how to start a letter, so don’t laugh at me. 
I’m so sorry about last night. I would never do something to hurt you like I did last night. Your feelings are more important to me than her or anybody else. I’m sorry for getting defensive last night, you had every right to be mad and I shouldn’t have said what I said, it was low of me. 
You’re my friend and I owe you this apology. Sometimes I wish we were more than that. I wish it had been you I was kissing. I wish you would feel the same way. But if that is not the case then, being your friend and being by your side is enough.
Love,
Mase”
“What does it say?” Aliyah said, curious as to why it left you speechless. 
“He…he has feelings for me” you said in disbelief, almost tearing up again, not looking up. 
“y/n! I told you! I fucking told you! Wow I’m like a genius at reading people” Aliyah was proud of herself. 
You tilt your head up to look at her, with tears brimming your eyes. 
“No, no, no. We are not doing this again. You are not going to cry. You are going to get ready, go to his place and talk to him and tell him you feel the same way.” 
“But-“ you tried to say. 
“Nope, I don’t care, c’mon get up.” Aliyah said pulling your hand so you would get up her bed. 
“But I said something hurtful-“ 
“And he did too, okay? You both did, and you will work It out. Try and work it out.” 
That was exactly what you needed to hear. You left her bedroom to go get ready and drive to Mason’s place. 
Once you put on a hoodie, shoes and got your purse and keys you were heading to Meson’s house. The drive to his house was a bit long, making you start overthinking everything. Maybe this seemed like a good idea 20 minutes ago, but now? What if he’s hurt and you can’t make him forgive you?
You arrived at his house and the nerves started getting bad and settling in your tummy.
You knocked on the door, waiting for him to open up. You heard footsteps approaching the door. There he was, in joggers and a hoodie, with a confused look on his face. 
“What are you doing here?” he asked. 
You hold up the card, again tears forming in your eyes. 
Mason glanced at the card, and then back at you. 
You reached out for him, and he smiled. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you into a hug. You both stayed there hugging for what felt like forever. You were crying, again. “Fuck, this like the 3rd time I’m crying today.” You said sniffing, making Mason giggle. 
He pulled away, letting you into his house. 
He grabbed your hand and took you to the living room. Both of you sat down and turned slightly so you could look at each other. 
“I’m sorry Mase-“
“Don’t, you don’t have to apologize.  I kind of deserved that either way.” He said cutting you off. 
“Doesn’t mean I’m still not sorry about it.” You said wiping the remaining tears on your cheeks. 
“Why didn’t you tell me you had feelings for me, Mase?” you asked. 
“I feared being rejected by you. I didn’t want to risk losing our friendship. I was scared that if by some miracle you did feel the same way, my lifestyle would be too much, and it wouldn’t work. I was scared by a lot of things. I also, I feel like you sometimes pushed me away a bit. And as for last night, I was trying to be a good wingman to Woody and it backfired so hard. I just froze when she started getting closer to me.” He said not looking at you, almost as if he was ashamed about it. 
“I forgive you.” You said, grabbing his hand. 
“Mase, I always had feelings for you. I pushed you away because I knew if I didn’t, I would just be falling more and more for you. I was also scared of you rejecting me. You know, you are who you are and have this amazing life and everyone loves you, and I’m just me. I didn’t think you would ever feel the same way about me.” You said choking up. 
“We really need to communicate better, fucking hell.” He said, making you both giggle. 
He placed a hand on your cheek, caressing it with his thumb. 
“How can I not fall for you?” he said whispering. 
Your heart melted and just leaned your head against his palm making him smile. “I’m too awkward to even admit all of this to you.” You said smiling. He chuckled. 
He started leaning in more and more, your noses bumping into each other. You finally closed the gap between you both and kissed him. 
You had always imagined this moment. Ever since you met him, and so did he. 
Your lips were moving in sync and it was the best feeling in the world. You didn’t want it to end. You both pulled away and rested your forehead together. 
“You know I wish you would see yourself the way I see you.” He said whispering. 
“Mase…” you said, almost tearing up again. 
“Don’t bring the water falls again,” he said giggling. 
You both embraced each other the whole night. Explaining everything that had happened the night before and that same morning. 
“I don’t want to ruin the moment.” You said looking up at him. 
“Oh uh…” Mason replied, looking down at you. 
“I should talk to Nicolas Mase. I owe it to him.” You said afraid of what he would think. 
Mason thought about it for a second. As much as he didn’t like him, he knew you were right. On the positive side Nicolas would know it was him you wanted and not Nicolas. 
“Can I ask you something?” Mason said not looking at you. 
“Yes of course.” “Did you ever had feelings for him?”, you chuckled at Mason’s jealousness. “No Mase, never.” You got up a bit to be face to face, and gave him a little kiss to assure him you never did. 
“I promise, I just need him to know how I feel about you and to say sorry if he thought there was something else between him and I.” 
“I know, I trust you.” He said, looking at you now. 
“But that can wait,” he got up from the sofa, and reached his hand out for you. 
“Stay here today, with me?”  he asked, giving you puppy eyes. 
“Okay you said smiling.” 
Both of you got ready for bed, he had given you one of his t-shirts and boxers for you to sleep in. 
Before falling asleep and getting into bed with him, you gave a quick text to Aliyah.
You both got under the covers and cuddled each other. The night was filled with kisses, Mason whispering sweet things, and you blushing. This was heaven for both of you, and what you had craved for so long. 
491 notes · View notes
scarletwinterxx · 15 days
Text
wait for your love - haechan scenario
hellloooo so this one is a request. I've mentioned it before, i'm still not the best at writing angst but I try😅 when i saw this request, a few scenes immediately popped in my head. Hope you like it🥺 also I was listening to We Can't Be Friends by Ariana on repeat while writing this.
Also a short anecdote, when I saw nct dream last year during Sorry, Heart stage I literally bawled my eyes out. Like full on ugly sobbing in my seat haha I was okay during the first verse but when it got to Haechan's turn to sing the chorus the tears just went falling like waterfalls
ANYWAYSSSSSS
For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.
and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛
All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.
(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)
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"What are we then?"
Those words shouldn't scare Haechan as much as it does. He hates it too. He hates how he can't say it to you but he doesn't want to let you go either.
He hates this grey area the two of you are in now.
"We're us. Isn't that enought?" he asks back
"For fuck's sake, we've been seeing each other for what? like 2 years now? And until now you still can't commit? I can't call you my boyfriend, you don't like it when people ask if we're dating"
"Because it's none of their fucking business"
"Well it's my business, I'm asking you right now, what the hell am I to you?" you stare at him, waiting for an answer. Any answer.
At this point hearing him say you don't mean anything to him would make more sense than the usual silence he'd give you.
"Baby, please I don't want to argue" he mumbles
"See, this is what you do all the time. I'm not a play toy. I'm not some past time you can call whenever you're bored, Haechan. We're adults now. I've invested my time, my feelings, a fraction of my life to you. For this. And you can't even answer me, is that too much to ask? Am I too much?"
You look at him, waiting for him to argue back. You didn't know it was this draining to be in a relationship or situationship or whatever it is you have with him. At some point you got tired of asking him what this all means. When it's clear he's not going to answer you, you stood up from your seat
"I can't do this" you whispered
"What?"
"I can't. I can't do what you're asking, Haechan" you speak clearer this time
He waits a few moments, letting the words sink in.
"What do you mean? I thought you said... you said we can"
With every word he tries not to show he's breaking right and the only thing keeping him together is you, and here you are about to slip through his fingers.
"We can't keep all promises, right? Like how you promised you'll try. This isn't trying."
"Baby-" "Don't" you cut him off. You know it will be a lot harder to walk away if you hear him call you that, it's already hard on you now.
"This is me letting you go" were your last words to him before walking away. You wipe the few tears that escaped, plastering a very fake smile before taking the first step away.
One of many you'd try to take just to get away from this heartbreak.
You would want to say that's not how it ended, that he changed his mind and finally mustered the courage to call you and say what he's really thinking. You want to say that he came the next day and surprised you, knocking on your door holding sunflowers for you.
But no.
After that day you never heard from him again. When you got the (unspoken) message that he'll never try to reach out and fix things between the two of you, you blocked him on everything. Your friends didn't ask questions, you went on with your life. Trying your best to bury and let that part of your story go.
From spending every day and most nights together to being strangers. You acted like he never existed to cover up the hurt you're feeling.
It's been over a year since that. You haven't really cried about it. Not even the day after he left. It's like you're just a shell now. You locked everything in a pandora box in your head, to be forgotten for the rest of time.
"Hey did you hear Dreamers new song?" your roommate asks the moment she steps through the door. You were sitting on the dinning chair, stacks of works and your laptop infront of you
She hears the song playing in the background, "Of course you have, it's good right?" she smiles
"Mhm, I like it"
"Sorry, Heart. Definitely an anthem for the broken hearted" she says withouth meaning out, "I meant like you know it's a sad song" she adds
You chuckle, she probably thinks this song is very fitting for you and you kinda agree with her.
"Anyways, I'm going to the lounge later. Want to come with?"
"Sounds good, I actually need to go out, stretch my legs and get some fresh air"
"Okay, let's leave after lunch"
You met with other friends at the lounge, chatting and sharing notes together. It was a good way to pass time. These days you find that it's best to keep yourself occupied so as not to think about things you'd rather not think about. You kept yourself busy. Finding random hobbies, fixation. For a while you liked running after class, then you got into baking, then crocheting. Activities that keeps you busy, distracted long enough not to remember.
One day you were at a record store, your newest hobby. Browsing for a new record to take home. Today out of the days you forgot to bring your headphones so you hum along the music playing in the store.
While reading the back of the record you were holding, you hear it.
A familiar voice you haven't heard in a long time, a voice you didn't think you'd hear again.
Your head shoots up, looking at the other side of the aisle.
You'd know his voice anywhere. You can be inside the loudest room and you'd still be able to single out his voice.
There he stands right across you, signing out your favorite bands newest song while he has his headphones on. Probably not realizing he's singing a bit too loud.
When Haechan felt someone staring at him, he looks up not expecting you to be looking back at him. He blinks a few times, comtemplating if this was all a dream or he's going crazy and started to hallucinate.
Immediately you put back the record you were holding and ran out the store. Once again leaving Haechan behind.
You're already far by the time he takes the steps to follow you, thinking this time he's not going to make the same mistake but you were already gone.
He knows you blocked him. Of course he tried to call you but his efforts were shut down when he couldn't reach you or his messages won't deliver.
Similar to you, he tried to find distractions. To drown out the thoughts, he drinks, goes out to parties, too many nights he drunk texted you, saying how much he missed you only to see it in the morning unsent. Most of the time there's music directly blasting through his ears. Music being his only escape from his own thoughts, if he's left long enough it's like his own mind is beating him up.
That's how he got into collecting records. He was on the look out for this new record so he decided to drop by the store that day. He didn't expect to see you there.
Out of all the places he'd see you again.
He's not going to lie, he imagined this moment many times before. Even rehearsed what he'd say to you when he see you again but now that it happened he just froze on the spot.
Just like that it's like he back in his room, watching you walk out his door for the last time. He's back to square one.
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It's been weeks and no sign of Haechan. It's a good thing, you think.
Also you've been subtly avoiding going to public places just in case you accidently see him again. You thought you're ready, but the moment you saw him it's like all of these emotions you've repressed since you left came back again.
Your roommate finally convinced you to come out. A few of you were gathering for karaoke night. You almost said no again but you need a night out, one more night in your room might just drive you crazy.
"Oh my gosh, girlie you're hereeeee" one of your friends squeals when she saw you walk in the room
"I'm here as a spectator, not to sing" you tell her, accepting the bottle of beer she hands you
"Alright by me, you better cheer the loudest when I sing"
You got invited to karaoke night. A couple of students from campus got together tonight to hang out for chill night. Even though you don't really sing, you do enjoy hanging out with your friends.
You were talking to another friend when suddenly you hear the intro to a familiar song being sung by a familiar voice.
왜 이리도 쉽게 토라지는지? (Why do I become mad so easily) 내 맘이 작아서 너무 한심하지? (It's pathetic that my heart is so small right?)
You look over the makeshift stage to see Haechan holding the mic, singing out one of your favorite songs.
어떻게 널 볼까? (How can I see you?) 밤새 뒤척인 맘의 조각들 반짝이지 않아 (I toss and torn all night The fragments of my heart don't shine) 난 알고 있는데 내가 할 수 있는 건 (I know it, what I can do is) "I'm sorry", 그 말뿐이란 걸 (Only those words)
Before the chorus starts, Haechan looks through the crowd finding you. He looks straight at you as if he's singing every word to you.
Words you wished you heard from him a long time ago.
Tell me why I let you down Any chance I get, I'm breaking down 잘못인 걸 다 아는데 (아는데), 왜 힘든 걸까? (I know I'm at fault but why is it tiring?) To tell you that I'm sorry, heart
For the rest of the song the two of you look at each other. You listen to him, imagining it was really him who was saying those words and not through the song.
When he finished, you stood up to go outside and get some fresh air.
Of course he's here. Luck was never on your side and fate seems to like playing jokes on you.
Haechan watches your back, giving the mic to the next person before following you out. You hear the footsteps behind you, knowing who it might be without looking back.
You're now at the rooftop of the building, a fewer people were hanging out here than inside. Feeling another presence beside you but they haven't said anything yet.
Even though you already know who it was, you don't say anything instead you get another beer from a nearby cooler and passing it over to Haechan without a word.
For a while neither of you said anything, watching the view in front of you.
“I get flashbacks when I see you and not the good kind” you finally speak out loud
“You’re saying that like I was the worst thing that ever happened to you” he snickers, holding the bottle up to his lips to drink his beer
He really didn’t think you’d talk to him or even acknowledge his existence at all. But now here you are, at some rooftop at a party he least expected to see you. 
He’s trying not to be too obvious but he can’t keep his eyes off of you. Maybe it was the way the light hit your face, or how the cold breeze was hitting his skin and yours. The moment he arrived he was kind of hoping to find you here tonight. He knew some of your friends were coming, you did use to have the same circle of friends until he started to distance himself.
He's glad though knowing you found good people who'll be there for you.
He's looking at you again, not being able to stop himself. It was at this moment he realized. Realized something he never thought he was ever capable of ever doing again. 
Feeling. Loving. Falling and accepting. 
The sound of horns from cars and the murmuring people in the background, the city lights in front the two of you and the stars as the witnesses. Witness for something that’s about to unfold.
It was scary. This new found knowledge scared him. 
In the past it was scary to him to even think about being tied down. To be committed to someone. All of this comes from his fear of failing. He wanted to tell you that before, the last day before you ended things between the two of you he wanted to let you know the reason why he couldn’t set things straight with you was because he was scared of letting you down. He was scared you might feel trapped. 
It's wasn't you who was too much for him. He was the one who felt like he was too much for you. He thought he was being too fast, too careless. His fears got the better of him, costing him a future with you.
You walked away and everything in his life got worse. Like the only light in his life was extinguished. 
Right now feels like that one chance to get things right. Even though he still feels scared, this time he’s willing to take that risk for you.
There are other things to be scared of, like your gaze. It was the way you were looking at him.
Like you can just consume all of him with those eyes. How you’re saying a thousand words with them without saying a single syllable.
One look into his own eyes and he's ready to surrender everything to you.
“Do you really want to hear my answer to that or are you still emotionally unavailable?” you ask, taking a sip of your own drink. 
“At what point did you realize you liked me? Like really liked me?” he asked instead, all he got was a laugh from you. You were laughing out loud like it was the funniest joke you’ve ever heard. 
“We were watching a movie, I mumbled something under my breath. I think it was something along the lines of ‘oh that’s so cute’, talking to myself. Then I felt you hold my hand, you kissed it before holding it in yours for the rest of the movie. It’s not the grandest gesture but at that moment I felt so content. It was all I wanted but I knew you didn’t think the same way” you smile sadly recalling that memory. Giving him an answer, wondering why you did.
"I guess I never said sorry, I'm sorry"
You shrug, taking another swig from your drink. "What's done is done. I would say no hard feelings but I kinda do hate you for what you did"
"Good. I'd be sadder if you said you didn't care. Hate isn't the opposite of love, it's indifference" he says
"Was that what you felt for me before? Indifference?" you can't help but ask, in your mind you're not sure if you're ready to hear his answer but it's too late to take it back
He shakes his head, drinking the rest of his drink before standing straight to face you
"I felt more for you, more than I ever said. In that I was wrong, I admit. I should've told you. It might be no use in telling you now, but I did feel something for you. I was being stupid and was too scared to admit it"
"Then why are you telling me now?"
"Because I realized not having you in my life is scarier than the thoughts in my head. I was too scared of my own mind, I sacrificed you instead when I shouldn't have. I could've told you. I wish I told you"
You listen to him, letting it sink in. For so long you asked just what went wrong, what you could've done differently or what would've happened if you stayed.
"I waited, I waited until you told me you liked me. But the more I waited, the more I started to not like myself. I knew I deserved more but I stayed because I wanted to be with you. You were always first to me" you say
Hearing you say those words breaks something in him. He did like you, he still likes you. Haechan has always kept a safe distance from everyone, you were the only exception.
"I'm glad we got to talk" you say to him with a smile, then you walk back inside.
This time Haechan didn't follow you because he knows this won't be the last time he sees you.
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"Oh my gosh, so that's what happened between the two of you?"
After that conversation with Haechan, you went back to your place and called it a night. The next day your roommate noticed you were staring blankly into space, out of concern she asked you what's wrong. You told her all that happened in the past 24 hours then you told her all about your history with Haechan.
"Yep, I haven't seen him around campus that much after that"
"You know, one of his friends is my blockmate and we go to the same gym. I heard he did an exchange program for a year, maybe that's why you haven't seen him around" she tells you
"Oh really, he did mention it before. Maybe he went through with it" you mumbled
"So you guys were like in a situationship then?"
"I guess so. We weren't exclusive, but he was the only guy I was seeing for like 2 years. Remember when I was barely home"
"Oh! That was him? He used to like send food here all the time whenever you were busy studying"
"What?"
"Oh my god I forgot to tell you that? yea this was like when you guys were a thing. During exam season or when you're busy with reports and stuff, he'd drop off food for you" she tells you
"I thought you had those delivered"
"Girl no, half of the time he leaves it at our door. The only reason I know is because I caught him one time and he fessed up"
No, you definitely didn't know that.
Haechan never told you. He never told you anything. At some point you thought it was better to not ask instead of being met with silence as a reply.
One thing you know though is he's the type to take action rather than say it. You won't be surprised if he did it before, he might not be good at expressing himself but he never passed the chance to make you feel like you're the only girl in his world.
It feels like that was another lifetime ago, that at some point in your life you'd rather be the backburner than totally lose him.
Seeing him again was no help. It's like you spiraled down again. You thought he didn't have this effect on you anymore but you were wrong. You'd be lying if you say you haven't thought of him since you saw him last.
What you didn't know was Haechan felt exactly the same. He's trying to think of a way to reach out to you without seeming to needy, he didn't want you to think he's forcing himself back into your life.
Another week has passed and still no sign of you. He decided to get drinks with his friends, he's a few drinks in when he decided to call it an early night. This really wasn't where he wanted to be.
He's not sure where he wants to be. All he knows is his night would be a thousand times better if he sees you, even just a glimpse.
On his walk back to his place, he plucked a branch from a random plant. Picking out the leaves one by one, leaving a trail behind him.
You're on your way back from the library, deciding to get some midnight snacks first. You noticed the scattered leaves on the road, chuckling at the sight. The more steps you take, you slowly realized it's the same path to your apartment.
You slowed down, looking around to check if anybody was close to you but the street is empty. You grab your phone in your pocket just in case, while you hold your keys with the other hand.
When you're nearing your front door, you see someone sitting at the steps. Head lying low, you can't even see his face but you'd know that brown mop of hair anywhere.
"Haechan?" you called out for him
Haechan looks up, seeing you walking towards him. At first he thinks he's dreaming, he wipes his eyes to clear his vision. Even pinched his arm to check if this was real.
You're here.
He's here.
"What are you doing here?" you asked once you're standing right in front of him
"I grabbed drinks with Yangyang and Jeno, I swear I was walking home. I guess I got confused" he mumbles, now holding a branch with no leaves on it.
You look at it, then looked back at the trail of leaves behind you.
"Do you want to come in? Go drink some water or coffee first before you head back" you offered
"Are you sure?" he asks back, standing up from the steps
"Wouldn't offer if I wasn't. Let's go inside, it's getting chilly"
He steps aside to let you go first, following behind you. The elevator ride up to your floor was quiet, even after going in your apartment Haechan didn't say a word.
"Here, have some water. I can make coffee but it's too late to drink it, do you want ramen or something?" you ask him while getting the snacks you got out of the grocery bag
"Do you usually ask guys to come in with you and cook ramen for them?" he asks
He meant to only think of it, but with the little amount of alcohol in his system seems to have turn the filter off.
You snicker at his question. Instead of answering him, you grab two ramen cup noodles from your cupboard and turn the kettle on. You wait for the red light to turn green before pouring it in the cups, bringing it over the kitchen island and taking the seat beside him.
"I can't even order late night snacks without thinking about you, we used to do it all the time when I came over at yours or when we're having late night hangouts. You ruined a lot of things for me" you finally say
Haechan just looks at your profile. Even though you say it like that, there's really no trace of anger on your face. Maybe you are, but to him you look so pretty and cozy. He wanted to beat himself up for ever thinking he can walk away from this. From you.
"For what it's worth, whenever I get drunk I used to text you all the time. You probably blocked me because the messages never got delivered. Every morning I see that on my phone, message after message until I lost count. I knew you weren't going to answer but I still did it"
"Why?" you ask him
"I missed you. I wanted to tell you I was being stupid, I wanted to beg for you to take me back. But all of those thing I could only say with a bit of help from alcohol. That's how I knew I couldn't go back, not yet anyways. You deserved more than drunken confessions"
You look over at him, for the first time since that night you really look at him. The same eyes that used to feel like home to you.
He looked so different yet the same.
You still feel the same.
"It's been 3 minutes, you hate soggy noodles" you nod at his ramen. Opening your own cup to start eating. Neither of you said anything after that. It wasn't awkward, you actually enjoyed the quiet.
For the first time since Haechan came back and you saw him again, your mind was at peace. You weren't overthinking things. You weren't wondering your long list of what if's.
It's like a part of you knew he's finally here again.
After the quick snack session, he helped you clean up before walking towards the door.
"Thank you for the uh snacks and water" he didn't know what to say, a shy Haechan is a rare sight so you can't help but smile.
Haechan sees this, he can feel his own cheeks redden. You still look so beautiful when you smile, so beautiful that he's ready to fight anyone who makes you smile that isn't him.
"Go home, it's late. You're sober now right?" you ask him
"Yea, I'm good"
"Okay, don't want you getting confused and going to someone else's front door"
"I promise I won't drunk text you again so will you unblock me now? Or if you have a new number you can text me or whatever. Actually you know what, do whatever makes you feel comfortable. Don't listen to me, I'm just blabbing now"
You can't help but giggle at him, the action making Haechan's heart skip a few beats.
"I'm imagining this is how those drunk texts would sound like" you say
"I missed you, Y/N" he mumbles
You don't say anything. He can hear his own heartbeating, each thump like it's the last then you're smiling back at him
"Goodnight, Haechan"
He smiles at you, waving goodbye before finally walking out. He gestures for you to close the door behind him, only leaving after he hears the lock from the other side. He skips back home.
The next few days were back to normal, you weren't feeling gloomy. You were going out with friends. All in all, you're in a great mood.
"Hey, somebody left this outside. Tell me I'm crazy but is this from Haechan?" your roommate hands you over a small bouquet of flowers with a paper bag full of snacks.
"Uh yeah, I think so"
"I know things didn't end well between the two of you, but the boy is still so whipped for you" she mumbles, watching the small smile on your face
"Maybe it's just a peace offering"
"Right, well whatever it might be I say go for it. As long as you're happy"
You look up at her, shocked to hear that all of a sudden "Isn't that what you're worrying about? You really think I didn't notice it, you were listening to Sorry, Heart on repeat the other day then now you're listening to love songs. If he's it for you, then give it a chance"
She left after that, leaving you alone at home.
You take the gifts Haechan sent to your room, putting the flowers in a vase. You see a small note attached,
xx12131xxx just in case you lost it or changed your number. - H
You get your phone and dial the number, it's still in your phone. You unblock it first before you click call, waiting a few rings before you hear his voice
"Y/N?"
"How did you know it was me?"
"I wasn't expecting anyone else, and uh it looks like you didn't change your number"
"Oh yea uhm so you're unblocked now" you told him, not really sure what else to say
He chuckles, "Thanks, so I'm guessing you got the flowers and the snacks?"
"Yeah, thanks by the way. Why though?"
"You shared your stash with me the other night, just wanted to pay you back"
"You didn't have to, I offered. But thanks again"
"Hey uh are you busy right now? or tomorrow or really whenever you're free"
"I don't have anymore classes today"
"Do you want to go grab coffee or food or anything really. Whatever you want, my treat"
If someone told you you'd be going out to get drinks with Haechan, you'd say they're out of their mind. But here you are, visiting a new cafe you've never been to with a guy you thought you'd never be with again.
"I'd get the taro milktea, thanks"
"I'll take this one" he points at the drink in the picture, "And two of the cookies please, thank you" he pulls out his card to pay for the both of you. When you got your drinks and food, you walked back outside to sit on the vacant seats. The weather was nice, it wasn't too hot or too cold. A perfect day to be out.
You open your drink, taking a quick sip while Haechan does the same. You notice he made the face, like when he drinks or eats something sour.
"It's lemon flavored isn't it?" you chuckle, taking the drink from him and giving yours to him instead
"No, it's fine. I'll drink it"
"You hate anything sour flavored, I like lemon it's fine" you sip his drink, it does taste good but you know he won't like it
He watches you get the cookies, breaking it in half before giving him the other.
"If you have anything to say, just say it. You're too in your head again" you tell him
"Sorry, I was just..." he's at lost for words, but this time not for the wrong reason.
It's like his mind can't put what he's feeling in to words.
"Did you get the record you were looking for?" you ask him, changing the topic
"Huh?"
"At the record store"
"Oh I wasn't really buying anything, I was just browsing around. They didn't have the vinyl version of the album I wanted, I'll come back some other time" he tells you, taking a sip of your well now his drink.
"You were singing to the Dreamers, you know them?"
"I know a few songs, Sorry, Heart is good. I like that one"
"Me too. You sounded good when you sang it" you complimented him, this made him smile shyly at you
"Isn't it a bit too sad?" he asks, you shrug your shoulders
"I like it, although my roommate said I've been playing love songs these past few days" you shake your head, remembering what she told you
"Thank you by the way" Haechan suddenly says
"For what? You paid for our drinks"
"I meant for agreeing to get drinks with me. I was an asshole to you. All the time I was gone, I was thinking about how to make it up to you. That is if it's okay with you" he tells you.
He mentally pats himself on the back for not messing that up. Maybe slowly he'll learn how to speak his true feelings, he just hopes you'll be there to listen to him. Even though it took him this long.
"The last thing you asked me was what are we, I was being stupid. I wanted us to be more. I wanted us to be official but I was always scared to say it. I don't know why I was ever scared of committing, I could've been with you. That's my regret"
"Haechan"
"You're not a playtoy to me or just some past time whenever I'm bored. You were never too much for me. If anything I was the one who lacked. I don't blame you for walking away, I deserved that. I needed that so I could finally grow up"
You listen to him. You listen to him finally say the words you've been waiting to hear from him.
"This time I want to do it right, I want to take you out on dates, be there to go on night walks with you, go buy records we'd listen to, whatever you want to I just wan to do it with you. If you'll still have me"
The last words was barely a whisper, like he's scared to say it outloud, scared you might turn him away.
Haechan feels his heart beating wildly again, one day he might pass from arrest he thinks. Then you smile at him and it's like everything in his world stops.
You lean over, kissing the corner of his lip lightly. It was so quick but to him it felt like long time
"All I wanted was that, when it gets too much in your head you can talk to me. I'll listen. We don't have to walk away from each other" you tell him
"I'm sorry" he whispers
"I forgive you, the same way I forgive myself from everything that has happened. We need to heal from those wounds for us to move forward"
He smiles at you, he didn't even notice he got a bit teary eyed until a few tears escaped. He wipes it away before looking back at you again.
You stand up from your seat, holding out your hand to him. He looks at your hand then your face then your hand again before intertwining it with his.
There wasn't a destination in mind, he's probably thinking the same. The two of you just walk where your steps lead you to, with him following beside you holding you close to him.
Haechan looks at your hands, a smile forming on his face. He leans towards you to kiss you on the head, the action making you smile too.
"Thank you" you hear him mumble. You didn't say anything back but he felt you grip his hand tighter. Squeezing it three times.
And he knew everything was finally going to be okay. This time, you won't let go.
167 notes · View notes
cheriladycl01 · 3 months
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Surrounded by Ice - Kimi Raikkonen x FigureSkater! Reader
Plot: The Iceman just surrounds himself with Ice in every aspect of his life
A/N: Just a short little Kimi drabble, more exciting stuff coming soon, just been swamped with Uni!
Credit to summerblueringo for the GIF
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"How does it feel to bring home a gold medal for your country, again?" the interviewer asks and a big grin appears on your face.
"I mean, i love the sport and I've worked hard to get where I am. I think this year there were many other contestants who also deserved gold and everyone who took part today were amazing!" you keep smiling, it had been a really amazing set for you today. You'd even broke some records while here.
"And now what is your plan?" they ask holding the mic closer to you.
"Well my husband is waiting for me, just over there. So i think he wants to give me his congratulations" you say pointing out our stoic looking husband who was waiting in the background, keeping to himself watching the world go past.
"Ah yes, Kimi Raikkonen! The Ice Man, who arguably married Queen of the Ice" he jokes making you laugh a little. You had heard similar jokes many times since you'd married Kimi.
"Yes, obviously being here in South Korea for the Winter Olympics has been amazing, and I'll be sure to train hard for 2022 but now I'm needed to go support my lovely lovely husband in his fast cars" you exclaim, knowing that the Australian Grand Prix was round the corner.
"Ah yes, it's looking like a good season for Ferrari! And we can tell from your outfit today they already have your support"
"My support is for whatever team my husband is in, so Ferrari have had my support since Kimi has raced with them!"
You left the interview thanking your team before finding Kimi waiting for you quietly.
"Home?" you ask and he nods silently grabbing your hand and pulling you out of the arena.
"You were fantastic today!" he smiles, holding you and pulling you into a kiss.
"Yeah? You liked the new twist i did?" you ask, your routine today being one of the hardest you'd ever done. You mascara had infact started to run, from the sweat building on your forehead throughout the day.
"I like everything you do"
You guys both went back to the hotel, packing up all of your gear that had been here for the past month you'd stayed in Korea for. Once you were sure you hadn't left anything behind you made your way to the airport.
Kimi now only had a month until Australia, his personal trainer had come with you to Korea to help him train while he was out there supporting you.
Now, you'd train while you were travelling with Kimi. Finding ice while on the road with him was always difficult, but finding places to just work out and keep your fitness up was never hard as you'd train alongside Kimi. It was one of the ways to spend extra time with him during the season when he was most busy.
In the free month before Australia you started your research on where you could go in Melbourne to skate, you found somewhere that Kimi was happy with you going too as it wasn't too far from the hotel you'd be staying in or the race track for if anything went wrong.
"Will you watch me on the Sunday though?" he'd asked you as you were both lying in bed the night before you were due to fly to Australia.
"When have I ever not?" you ask, turning over in bed to look at him.
"Hmmm, I can for sure think of one time..." he smirks looking over you.
"If your talking about China, almost 10 years ago that doesn't even count!" you laugh, poking his cheek a little.
Your husband never failed to amaze you, his striking blue eyes and his soft blonde hair was what initially drew you in. But it was your first interaction with him that made you fall for him fully.
It was the Autumn of 2008 and you were 22 and you had just won your second Gold Medal in China, you'd stayed there for the months after the games as they left the Beijing Olympic Park open and it seemed like a good place to stay and to train.
You managed to get tickets to other sporting events in the months you stayed there such as Snow Boarding, Golf but the best one was when the Chinese Grand Prix came about.
You were active on the socials you had back then, and so it wasn't hard for Sauber BMW to reach out to you and give you a guest pass.
You'd been walking round the paddock, just investigating when you'd bumped right into the Finnish Ferrari driver. He had just stared at you while holding a tight grip on your wrist so you didn't fall over.
You remember him asking if you were okay, and some other questions that you hadn't heard fully as your brain had gone foggy at the sound of his soft, yet deep voice.
It was a little embarrassing, when he'd tried to speak Finnish to you, and then decided on English, but with no reply he was left stumped and awkwardly standing there.
He'd soon left after that but you were on each other's minds for the whole day. You tried to keep up conversations with the BMW drivers Robert and Nick but your mind kept drifting the the Finnish Driver for Ferrari.
He found you after the race, and just stared at you for a while before you made the first move speaking to him. And the rest was history.
You spent the next 5 years together as partners, it was convenient for someone like Kimi who raced all through the year apart from summer and winter to end up with someone in a sport who only competed for a month in the summer and winter. It meant that they also still got a break with each other.
After 5 years, Kimi let the big question unload and now you'd been married for 5 years.
"Of course, my love! You know that!" you smile, pulling him closer to you. You tuck yourself into his surprisingly warm embrace, considering his nickname was 'Iceman' he was the warmest person you'd ever had the privilege of meeting.
"I was thinking ..." he breathes, his voice a little higher and whiny than normal.
"Mmmmm, you don't do that often?" you tease, a hand running up and down his back.
"Well, I'm the ice man, your the Ice Queen... i was thinking maybe it's time we have an Ice Baby?" he whispers in the softest most unsure tone you'd ever heard.
"You think now's a good time?" you ask, and thinking about it... it was. You yourself had two years before the next Olympics in 2020, and Kimi was at a point in his career where he could leave and live comfortably if he needed and wanted to.
"I haven't told you this, but they want the Sauber kid in my spot. I'll be going to Alpha Romeo next year. I feel like I've done what i can and I've had my time in the sport... and we aren't getting any younger. Especially me..." he jokes, being 44 now.
"Mmmmmm I think now is the perfect time" you smile.
Flash forward to the Austin Grand Prix and you were 6 months pregnant. You'd already announced it and so many people were excited for you and Kimi, through the season he had loads of interviews. All against his will of course but people saw a different side to him when he talked about you and the soon to be baby.
It was a great race for Kimi in Austin, he pulled through with his first win of the season, valuable points that helped contribute towards his position in the drivers standings.
"So Kimi, first win of the season today! How are you feeling?" an interviewer asks, he was sat in a panel with some of the other drivers in a debrief.
"It was good to get a win, this season has been tough. We've had an interesting year with veteran drivers like myself, Seb, Fernando and Lewis being pushed by newer or younger drivers who are proving to be good competition like Charles, Max and Pierre" he answers.
"There have been rumors that you wont be here with us next season?" he pushes and Kimi roles his eyes.
"If I'm not it's not an issue... racing is my hobby that i get paid to do. I'll leave when i want to" he admits without letting anything slip that Ferrari wouldn't want to come public knowledge.
"Lets move on to you Lewis..."
And for the rest of the interview all he could think of was coming back to you.
Once your daughter was born in January before the start of the 2019 season and Kimi moving to Alfa Romeo everyone on the grid wanted to meet her. So of course, you were obligated to come to Australia for pre-season testing. Your 3 month old being so intrigued at the busy rush of everything around her.
She was a fan and driver fav around. Everyone had a picture with her and introduced themselves as her uncle and that they would look after her. People like Lewis, Seb and Charles all came with little gifts for her, Seb even had someone make her a custom team Ferrari top so she could fit in with her father and her Uncle Sebastian.
"Today was amazing!" you sighed as you leaned into your husband who currently held your daughter against his bare chest.
"Mmmm, I think you should both take a break though, at least until Summer break and join me afterwards" he smiles, knowing that the heavy time change from Monaco to Australia wasn't good for your or the baby.
"Well, I may as well come to Bahrain with you... its on the way back. But I will leave after that" you smile, pulling him in for a kiss.
"I love you, thank you for giving me this life" he smiles looking between you and his daughter.
"I wouldn't have it any of way" you grin.
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @kapsylia @laneyspaulding19 @lazybot @malynn @cassielikereading @viennakarma @teamnovalak @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @jlb20416
502 notes · View notes
angel-w0nderland · 8 days
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~ 𝖲𝗍𝖾𝗉𝖻𝗋𝗈!𝖲𝖺𝗆 𝖬𝗈𝗇𝗋𝗈𝖾 𝖷 𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 ~
~ 𝖲𝗆𝗎𝗍 ~
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~ Authors Notes - this is my first time writing something but i did have help so please let me know what you like or don't like :) i also don't own any of the gifs used ~
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Sam Monroe, the boy who was your stepbrother for the past four years, shuffled into your bedroom, his eyes darting around the familiar space like a caged animal. He took a seat on the edge of your bed, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his worn jeans, and let out a sigh. You knew why he was here. Your parents were gone for the weekend, leaving the two of you to fend for yourselves. It wasn't the first time they'd left you alone together, but something felt different today. Maybe it was the way he kept glancing in your direction, or the nervous energy that seemed to radiate from him. Or maybe it was the way your heart fluttered just a little bit faster whenever he was near.
"So…what do you wanna do?" he finally asked, his voice barely above a whisper. You knew he was trying to act nonchalant, but you could see the uncertainty in his eyes. You took a deep breath, trying to muster up the courage to say what was on your mind. "Sam?" you began, your voice barely above a whisper. "Can I…talk to you about something?" He looked up at you, his blue eyes meeting yours, and something in the way he was looking at you made your heart skip a beat.
You took another deep breath and blurted out, "I've…I've grown pretty used to having you around. And I…I just wanted to say that…well, I don't want you to think I'm being weird or anything, but…I kind of…like being with you." You felt your cheeks flush as the words left your mouth, but you couldn't take them back now.
Sam's expression slowly changed as you spoke, first surprise, then confusion, then something that looked like…relief. "You…you like being with me?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. "Even when we're just hanging out like this?"
Heat flooded your cheeks as you nodded, unable to meet his gaze. "Yeah…I do. I mean, you're always so…funny and smart. And you're really sweet, too. I just…I never realized how much I enjoyed being around you until now." The words tumbled out of you, unbidden and unfiltered. You felt your heart racing, but you couldn't stop now. You took a deep breath and looked up at him, hoping he understood what you were trying to say.
Sam leaned forward, his expression softening, and cupped your face in his hands. "Really?" he whispered. "You mean that?" You could feel the warmth of his skin against yours, and it sent a shiver down your spine. "Because I feel the same way, you know. I mean, I thought you just…put up with me or something." He paused, searching your eyes for any sign of doubt. "But I'm glad I'm not just some annoying stepbrother to you."
His thumbs traced circles on your cheeks, and you couldn't help but close your eyes, savoring the feeling of his touch. "Sam…" you whispered, your voice trembling. You wanted nothing more than to feel his lips on yours, to taste him and know that he felt the same way you did. But you were afraid to take that step, afraid that it might ruin everything.
He leaned in closer, his lips mere inches from yours, and you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. "What is it, he whispered, his voice thick with desire. "Do you want me to…?" Before he could finish his sentence, you felt his lips brush against yours, gentle at first, then more insistent as he deepened the kiss. Your heart raced and your blood sang in your ears, and for a moment, there was nothing else in the world but the two of you and the way your bodies fit together so perfectly.
Sam's hands slid down your back, cupping your bottom, and pulled you closer against him. You moaned into the kiss, feeling the heat between your legs grow as his hips grind against you. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him even closer, as if you could somehow crawl inside him.
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The world around you faded away as you lost yourself in the moment, the only thing that mattered was the taste of his lips and the feel of his skin against yours. It felt like an eternity since your lips had been touched this way, and you didn't want it to end. But as you felt Sam's breath hitch in his throat, you knew he needed air just as much as you did.
He broke the kiss, his chest heaving as he stared down at you with dazed eyes. "God, I've wanted to do that for so long," he murmured, his voice hoarse. You could see the conflict in his eyes, the desire battling with the uncertainty. You reached up and traced his bottom lip with your finger, feeling the softness of his skin beneath your touch.
"It's okay," you whispered, your voice shaking. "I want this, too." You leaned in again, pressing your lips against his in a tender, exploratory kiss. He responded eagerly, his hands moving up to cradle your head as he deepened the kiss. Your tongues danced together, a tentative duet that quickly grew more confident and passionate.
As you kissed, you became aware of the weight of his body against yours, the heat between your legs, and the way your hearts seemed to beat as one. You felt as if you could lose yourself in this moment, surrender to the overwhelming desire that pulsed between you.
With a gasp, Sam broke the kiss, his chest heaving as he stared down at you with a mixture of awe and lust. "I've wanted to do that for so long," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. He trailed his fingers down your cheek, along your jaw, and back up to cup your face in his hands.
You felt dizzy with the intensity of the moment, your heart racing and your body on fire. You reached up, entwining your fingers in his hair, and pulled him down for another kiss, deeper and more passionate than the last. His lips were soft and yielding against yours, and as you kissed, you could feel the hardness of him pressed against your thigh.
Sam moaned into the kiss, his hips moving rhythmically against yours, and you arched your back, pressing your breasts against his chest. Heat pooled low in your abdomen, and you squirmed against him, wanting more. His hands slid down your back, cupping your bottom, and lifted you up, bringing your legs around his hips. You wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling the roughness of his skin against your fingertips.
He kissed you deeply, his tongue dancing with yours, and you could feel the hardness of his erection pressing against your core. The sensation sent a shiver of desire down your spine, and you ground your hips against him, needing the contact. His fingers dug into your skin, holding you close, as if he was afraid you might disappear.
As you kissed, you could feel your body growing more and more alive, every nerve ending tingling with anticipation. The air between you seemed to crackle with energy, and you could feel the weight of his desire pressing down on you. You arched your back, offering yourself up to him, and he took it, his lips moving lower, kissing a trail down your neck and collarbone.
His hands roamed over your skin, possessive and hungry, as if he couldn't quite believe you were real. You moaned into the kiss, feeling the heat building inside you, and you ground your hips against him in time with his movements. You could feel the dampness between your legs, and the ache deep in your core, and it was all you could do not to cry out.
As his lips traveled lower still, kissing and nipping at your breast, you arched your back, offering him deeper access. He groaned into your skin, his body trembling against yours as he took your nipple into his mouth, sucking gently before flicking it with his tongue. You cried out, the pleasure too intense to bear, and your hips bucked against him.
He pulled back, his eyes meeting yours, and you saw the raw desire there, the need for connection. "God, I want you," he breathed, his voice rough with emotion. "I want this so much."
You reached down, unbuttoning his pants, revealing his hardness to the air. You wrapped your hand around him, feeling the heat and the weight of him in your palm. He arched his back, moaning deeply, and you could see the tension in his shoulders as he fought to remain in control. His hips moved of their own accord, grinding against your hand. "Please," he whispered, his voice ragged. "I need you."
You moved closer, guiding his hardness to your entrance. He gasped as you took him inside you, feeling the tightness of your body surrounding him. He let out a shuddering breath, his hips moving instinctively, thrusting deeper. You moaned, arching your back to meet his movements, the sensation of being filled by him almost too much to bear.
His hands gripped your hips, holding you steady as he began to move, his rhythm growing faster and more urgent. You could feel the tension building inside you, the need for release growing more and more intense. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer, wanting to feel him deeper.
The sounds of their bodies colliding filled the room, a symphony of pleasure and desire. He kissed you, his lips soft and demanding against yours, as he thrust harder, faster. You could feel the heat between you, the sweat that dripped from your skin, and you knew there was no turning back now. This was happening, and it was real.
His movements grew more frenzied, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he neared the brink. You could feel the tension building inside him, the impending release that was going to shake him to his core. You wanted to be there with him, to feel it too, to share this moment of connection.
You arched your back, meeting his thrusts with a moan, your fingers digging into his shoulders. The sensation of being so close, of feeling him inside you, was overwhelming. You could feel the heat between your legs, the tightness building inside you, and you knew that release was close, so close.
His pace quickened, his body moving with a desperate urgency. His skin was flushed, his breath ragged as he neared the brink. You could feel the tension in his arms, the power that he was holding back, and you wanted nothing more than to help him let go. You wrapped your legs tighter around his waist, arching your back further, begging for more.
His thrusts became deeper, harder, as if he was trying to reach something just out of reach. His hips slapped against yours, his body moving in perfect rhythm with yours. You moaned his name, feeling the building pressure inside you, the impending release that was going to consume you both.
He let out a guttural cry, his body tensing as he came, his release spilling into you. You could feel the heat of him, the wetness as he emptied himself, and it was the most intense sensation you'd ever felt. Your body tightened around him, your own orgasm washing over you in a wave of pleasure so intense it was almost painful.
You clung to him, your fingernails digging into his shoulders as you rode out the wave of sensation. His breath came in ragged gasps, his body still moving within yours, their movements now slow and tender. The room spun around you, the world reduced to the feel of his skin against yours, the taste of his lips on yours.
He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before trailing it down your cheek, across your jaw and to your neck. His touch was gentle, almost reverent, and it sent shivers through your body. "I want to stay like this forever," he murmured, his voice still ragged from exertion. "Just… with you."
You wrapped your arms around him, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours, the strength of his muscles beneath his clothes. You could feel the weight of his chest against yours, and it was a comforting, reassuring sensation. You let out a contented sigh, closing your eyes as you savored the moment.
They continue to lie entwined, the weight of their post-coital contentment pressing down on them. As they drift in and out of sleep, they share dreamlike fragments of memories from their past, discovering new aspects of each other and forging a deeper emotional connection
Their breath mingles, the rise and fall of their chests in perfect harmony.
The room grows brighter as the sun peeks through the curtains, casting a warm golden light across their entwined forms. You could swear that the air in the room feels different, somehow lighter and more alive. It's as if their bodies are inextricably linked, each breath and heartbeat synchronized, as if they share a single existence.
✦ ▬▰▬ ▬▰▬ ★✦★ ▬▰▬ ▬▰▬ ✦
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lowkeychenle · 9 months
Text
Like We Just Met [ZCL] (M)
Description: Everything else about the day is completely normal when Chenle realizes he wants to marry you. It hits him like a tidal wave, and he's itching to tell you just how much he wants to love you forever.
Genre: Fluff (literally SO MUCH FLUFF we love Chenle in this house go away if you don't) // Smut
Content Warnings: Explicit unprotected sex (it's actually sweet this time am I feeling okay), talks about marriage etc etc. Nothing really dark or upsetting in here.
Word Count: 11,292 (y'all I have no idea how this happened...)
Pairing: Zhong Chenle x Reader (feat. the rest of the Dreamies)
ISTJ 7Dream Series Masterlist
Juliet's Masterlist | Requests/Tell me what you think of this plz <3
Tag List (open for ISTJ 7Dream Series): @kunvibing
Author's Note: Lowkey? This was so fun because it's from Chenle's POV...or it's supposed to be haha. This is probably my favorite fic I've ever written catch me crying in the corner...also this gif don't mind the real tears in my eyes
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Nobody questioned Renjun when he said he’d invited his friend to dance practice. They brought friends in every now and then, so it wasn’t anything new. Chenle was having a bit of an off day. He kept screwing up the choreography (that he’d done seven hundred times probably in the past week alone) and even accidentally elbowed Jaemin.
Renjun’s friend had yet to show up. Chenle was beyond frustrated with the way things were going, so he let everyone know he was taking a break. He grabbed his water bottle and stomped out of the practice room.
He ended up a bit down the hallway, resting his back on the wall with his eyes closed. All he needed was a break. That had to be it.
“Are you okay?” a soft voice asked.
When he looked at you, he recoiled a bit. He’d never seen you before—he’d definitely remember—but something about you felt familiar. Like a warm aura surrounded you and infiltrated him in the best ways.
“You’re Chenle, right?” You tilted your head at him. “I’m Renjun’s friend, (Y/N). I was supposed to watch practice, but I got lost. This building is pretty big.”
“Yeah, I’m Chenle.” He blinks at you a couple more times. “Um, we’re always in the same practice room. I’ll take you over there.”
“Actually, is there a place to get some water? I forgot mine at home.” You scratched the top of your head and scrunched up your nose. “It was really hot outside.”
“It’s on the way.” He gestured down the hall with his head.
You followed him without hesitation. He was acutely aware of every step you took, of how there was only a few feet between the two of you. Even though he had no clue what to say to you, you didn’t mind walking along in silence. It was unlike him to be shy. Next to impossible for him to be starstruck.
“How long have you known Renjun for?” he asked. And why the hell had you not come around sooner?
“Oh.” You took a deep breath and pursed your lips in thought as Chenle stopped to grab you a water bottle from the kitchen. “Four years now? Five? His family knows mine, so when I came back here, his parents told him he had to help me find my way around.”
“Well, today’s pretty laid back,” Chenle explains. “We’ll probably practice for another hour or two and then go home. We’ve been at it all day.”
You hum in response, opening the cap and taking a sip. “Thank you for this. Sorry to keep you from practice.”
“Don’t be. I’m ready to get the hell out of here.” Chenle chuckles, gaze drinking you in when you’re distracted by your water. “And…they can be a little…much at first. But they’re all great people, so you’ll be fine.”
“Bold of you to assume I’m nervous.” You narrowed your eyes at him playfully.
He bit back a smile, pressing his lips into a thin line instead. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“Renjun has given me plenty of warnings,” you tell him.
He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t taken you to the practice room yet. The two of you stood in the kitchen, but he knew the second you were with everyone else, the conversation was over. He didn’t want to stop talking to you, and that odd feeling of warmth settled into his chest.
“Like what?” Chenle raised his eyebrows.
“He said you’re cranky and mean.” You smiled at him, and he swore he was almost knocked off his feet. There was something about you that drew him in.
Chenle made a mental note to scold Renjun later, but he’s not necessarily wrong…he was cranky until he saw you.
“Well, in that case, what he said about everyone else is probably accurate, too.”
“You don’t look cranky,” you interjected. “You’re not mean either. Mean people don’t get strangers water bottles.”
“I’m mean to Renjun. And Jisung.”
“They’re your friends. You get a pass for your friends.” You slid one of your hands into the back pocket of your jeans, rocking on the balls of your feet as silence befell the room.
“They’re waiting for me,” Chenle says. “We should go.”
You nodded in agreement and followed him. He sulked a bit when the other members were introduced to you. They were all nice—because they always were—but when it came time to get back to practice, he found himself gravitating toward you several times.
Nearly every time he looked at you, you were already looking at him, too. Maybe it wasn’t just him that felt the weird tug. He hoped it wasn’t.
After they wrapped everything up, Chenle sat against the back wall, feeling so heavy as if he could fall asleep right there. He was exhausted.
Jaemin, Jeno, Donghyuck, and Mark were already on their way out the door, leaving Jisung to slump next to Chenle and Renjun to talk with you. Jisung noted how he was watching you, but he didn’t say anything right away. He drank his water and stayed quiet.
You said something to Renjun, who smiled at you and nodded. He headed for the door and waited for you outside. When Chenle realized you were coming over to him, he shot a worried glance over at Jisung.
“Would you look at that?” Jisung cleared his throat. “Time for me to go.”
Before Chenle could even grab him, Jisung was halfway to the door. Once you were in front of him, you sat down and crossed your legs.
“You did really well today.”
He chuckled. “I think that’s the worst I’ve done this comeback season.”
“Then you’re in pretty good shape.” You shrugged, picking at the seam of your jeans. “I wanted to thank you. For helping me earlier.”
“It wasn’t that big of a deal,” he said. “You’re Renjun’s friend. Of course, I’d help you.”
“Right.” You brushed your hair over your shoulder and prepared to stand up. “I should go—”
“Will you be coming back?” The question shot out of his mouth, sending a blush to his cheeks in response.
“I’m not sure,” you told him. “That’s up to Renjun I guess. It was really cool to see how passionate you guys are.”
“Let me give you my number.” Chenle grabbed his phone from his pocket. “Um, just in case you get lost again. And need help finding the room.” He cringed at himself, hoping he wasn’t going to get rejected.
“Yeah, I’d like that.” You gave him the tiniest smile, but it made his heart flutter anyway.
He handed it to you with the contact app open. You didn’t even hesitate to type in your name and number. After, you sent yourself a text, and Chenle heard it ring in your back pocket. You gave it back to him, grinned, and left him sitting there in shock.
He couldn’t choose between staring at you as you left and looking down at your contact open on his screen. His stomach twisted with nerves, but the second he saw the smiley face emoji you’d put next to your name, he already knew.
You were going to be someone to him.
Mark drops something in the kitchen, snapping Chenle out of it. He looks at you, and you smile back at him. With you pressed into his side and your legs over his lap, he can’t help but grin right back.
His hand rests on your thigh, thumb sliding gently back and forth as he presses a kiss to your temple. He’d never get used to this.
After returning from the kitchen, Mark allows the game to resume. His nose scrunches as he glances between you and Chenle. “That’s a weird ass question.”
“Not weird.” Chenle shakes his head. “Critical thinking, Mark, you should try it.”
“Oh, be nice.” You shove his shoulder.
For a while now, Chenle has felt his feelings growing more than he thought possible. He’s already in love with you (thankfully, since you’ve been together almost a year now), but something about you lately has him on a whole other level. Even then, he’s not sure what it is. He decides he’ll ride it out for a while and see where it takes him.
“Why would you ask your girlfriend what year she’d take a time machine back to? Shouldn’t she be like…happiest now?” Mark asks, sipping on whatever mixed drink he’d prepared in Chenle’s kitchen.
“You’d think.” Chenle snorts, leaning back against the couch and throwing his arm around you.
“He asks me questions like this all the time,” you tell Mark. When you steal a glance at your boyfriend, his breath catches in his chest.
What the hell is going on with him lately? He can’t concentrate around you (even more than usual) and every tiny thing you do has his heart hammering against his ribcage. Soon enough, he’s sure you’ll both hear the bones crack.
“Has anyone, by chance, ever told you two that you’re gross?” Mark chuckles to himself and leans back in the recliner. “Some of us are single and lonely, you know.”
“Some of us will never be that again,” Chenle shoots back.
“Oh, you two are the worst.” Your laugh echoes pleasantly in his ears, and he subconsciously leans closer to you.
“I am curious what your answer is, though,” Mark interjects. “Since Chenle’s so sure.”
Chenle takes a sip of his own drink, nearly cringing at the bitter taste dragging down his throat. He’s not much of a drinker—social at best. But he can still appreciate the buzz and the hazy happiness that comes with it. You take his hand that dangles over your shoulder, twirling the friendship ring wrapped around his middle finger. The action is so, so simple, yet it makes his stomach turn.
If he doesn’t figure out what the hell’s going on with him soon, he’s gonna have to separate himself from you.
“Well, you’re right.” You shrug, shuffling closer to Chenle. “This part of my life has definitely been the best. But if I could go back to any time, it would probably be when we met. You only get to meet Zhong Chenle once in your life, dude. I’d do it over and over again if I could. The second I saw him, I knew he would be important to me.”
Chenle thinks back to the moment he first saw you. The way he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you like an actual child or the way he took in every detail of you to store in his mind forever—just in case he never got to speak to you again. He pauses, eyebrows furrowing slightly as he analyzes your answer.
Mark groans. “That doesn’t count! That was last year.”
Grabbing the pillow next to him, Chenle throws it at his friend. “Leave her alone, it was a good answer.”
But when he contemplates that thought, he’s not sure he understands what you mean. His ears burn, the tips of them turning red as he recalls how embarrassingly nervous he was around you all the time. How awkward all of your firsts together were. Everything now is so much better than back then.
Not to mention he’s looked at you the same way since that first night. His feelings for you have grown, sure, but those butterflies he used to get still torment him just about every time he sees you smile.
“Why?” Chenle finally asks.
“You were so cute,” you hum, shifting closer to him. “Everything made you nervous. You almost keeled over in embarrassment when you asked to hold my hand.”
Mark laughs, and Chenle sends a glare his way. No part of that is even anywhere near funny.
“Okay, it's your turn.” Mark gestures at you.
Chenle resists the urge to reach over and touch your face. Usually, he’s so much better about being so clingy in front of his friends and, while he would prefer Mark not seeing this side of him, he couldn’t care less when his gaze is locked with yours.
“Cool.” You nod, taking a sip of your drink. “Both of you. Hypothetical situation. Let’s say you’re drunk. You walk into a room and everyone you’ve ever loved is in there. Like…loved. Who are you going to?”
“Dude.” Mark’s jaw drops. “That’s such a shitty question for me.”
“You’ll live,” Chenle replies. “Just romantic love?”
“All of it. Platonic, romantic, family.” You purse your lips in thought.
Chenle doesn’t have to think about it. Not really. He’d rather get struck by lightning and then hit by a bus right after before admitting that so easily in front of Mark. In this case, it’s always been you. From the second you spoke to him for the first time, he was irrevocably yours. 
“You.” Chenle watches your eyebrows raise.
“Be serious,” you say. “Your parents are included in that.”
“I’m serious. You.” Chenle chuckles.
You give him a pointed look, but that’s when Mark cuts in.
“No, he’s for real. Like…that legitimately happened.” Mark leans forward, elbows digging into his thighs as he rests his head in his palms. “Do you guys not remember?”
“What are you talking about?” you ask him, frowning.
Chenle remembers. Barely, and it’s a bit foggy, but it comes back like a baseball bat upside the head as Mark starts telling the story.
Chenle’s birthday party last year. The night was barely halfway through and he was drunk enough to be stumbling over his feet. He’d heard you were coming, but he had yet to see you. Even when every other feeling was numbed by the tingling sensation the alcohol left behind, his craving to see you was all that remained. 
Mark walked next to him, having a full conversation with himself since Chenle was so fog-brained. As much as he loved Mark, there was only one person he wanted to see. Everyone he knew and loved was here—his parents, the rest of his group, and Jisung had somehow forgotten to uninvite Chenle’s ex.
He only ever dated one person before you, but he wasn’t sure he ever loved her. Regardless, there she was. Even with her standing across the room from him, he kept waiting like a lost puppy.
When you walked in, he swore the whole world stopped around him. Everyone but you was moving in slow motion before they eventually faded into nothing, darkness that was emphasized by the light you were. His breath caught in his throat, and he stopped walking.
Chenle couldn’t form a coherent thought while he stared at you, drunken stupor making it so much easier to forget the embarrassment. Mark watched him curiously as Chenle made his way over to you. He refused to waste any more time when he knew you were the one he wanted to talk to.
You had always been more confident around him than he was around you. Your face lit up when you saw him, wrapping your arms around him. He secured you in his grasp, breathing in the scent of your hair and the perfume you wore.
“Happy birthday.” Your voice is muffled a bit by his T-shirt. “Sorry I’m late, took a bit longer to get ready than I thought it would.”
He knew he should’ve let you go. People were starting to notice the way he was clinging to you, and not even being drunk could excuse that behavior. He was about ready to tell everyone except you to leave. Nothing else mattered. If he could spend his birthday with you, it would be the best one yet.
It’d been two months since Renjun had introduced you to the rest of them. Which means, he’s only known of your existence for two months, and you already command so much of his brain matter that he can’t think of anyone but you. Great.
He finally (reluctantly) let you go and led you over to the rest of the group. Nobody said anything when he made Mark scoot over so you could sit next to him. Nobody questioned it. His parents would ask him about it later, but until then, there was no reason for him to worry. After all, his crush on you was the most obvious thing in the world, so it was only a matter of time before you found out about it.
By the end of the night, he hadn’t spent enough time with you. People were starting to shuffle out, but you stayed, chatting with Renjun until only four remained. Chenle’s parents had gone to bed long ago. You were almost caught up to him on drinks, your laughs longer and your movements slower.
Under any other circumstances, he wouldn’t have been as brave as to walk up to you and ask you to stay the night. He didn’t mean it in a suggestive way, either. He just didn’t want you to leave yet.
“Chenle,” Renjun scolds, swatting his shoulder. “You can’t ask something like that so casually.”
“You want me to stay here? With you?” Your voice was higher than normal. Chenle accredited it to the alcohol raging in your system.
“I like when you’re here.” Chenle nodded. “You make everything calm.”
Renjun scrunched up his face, slamming his forehead into his palm. “(Y/N), you should probably go home—”
“No, it’s okay.” You brushed him off. “I’m okay with staying.”
Oh, he was in love with you. There was no other explanation for the way his heart skipped a beat when those words came out of your mouth.
Chenle doesn’t remember the rest of that night, but he does recall waking up next to you in the morning and freaking out. Alcohol made him brave, but it didn’t save him from the red-hot embarrassment of the next day.
“I didn’t even realize…” you trailed off, a small smile forming on your face. “You picked me.”
“I’ll always pick you,” Chenle responds easily, like second nature.
Mark decides it’s time for him to leave, but Chenle’s mind is still reeling with memories. With all of the firsts you said you wished you could relive. But no matter how hard he tries, he can’t figure out what the fuck this feeling is. As the two of you climb into bed, he’s so distracted, he can’t fall asleep, even with you curled into his chest.
“(Y/N),” Chenle groaned when he saw you in the practice room mirror. “You gotta stop showing up here if you don’t want me to fall in love with you.”
It was a joke. Sort of.
“Right, and let you forget to eat? I think not.” You fought back every time, unphased by the way he so casually admitted he’s starting to fall for you.
At least, that was his idea of admitting it.
You walked over with the bags in your hand, sitting down on the practice room floor next to him. 
“I haven’t even been here that long,” Chenle defended himself. “I would’ve eaten after I left.”
You unloaded the contents, opening boxes. “I can go if that’s what you want.”
“Not what I said.” For some reason, he felt a sudden burst of courage. He’s known you for four months at this point, and something about today felt…right. “I was serious, you know.”
“About what?” You grabbed the drinks from the carrier.
“You.”
“What?” You recoiled, looking at him in confusion.
He contemplated telling you to forget it. That it didn’t matter, and thank you for the food instead. If you didn’t feel the same way for him, he’d be devastated. And then you’d leave him for good and take all the food with you. He was starving.
“If you keep doing nice things for me, I’m gonna fall for you.” As if he hasn’t already.
You paused, but Chenle didn’t miss the blush on your face. Clearing your throat, you looked away from him and took a deep breath. His fists clenched as he awaited your rejection, but the longer the silence stretched, the more he felt you might want him to.
“Don’t say things like that if you don’t mean it,” you finally said and brushed your hair behind your ears. Reaching forward for the food again, you gave Chenle a shocked look when he grabbed your wrist.
“You’re right. I’m not going to fall for you. I already did.”
Your jaw dropped, eyes widening as his words settled in the air around both of you. With his heart racing, he released your wrist and intertwined your fingers instead.
“I really, really like you.”
“You should really eat your food before it gets cold.” You pulled your hand from his and pushed the box closer to him.
He stared blankly at the wall, noting the sudden chill on his skin that you left behind. A sinking feeling encapsulated his chest, and he knew he ruined everything. You looked like you were ready to run.
“Forget I said anything,” he told you. “I’m sorry if that was weird.”
“Eat,” you commanded again. “I’m not talking about this with you until I know you’ve eaten. If you don’t, we’ll go off on a tangent and you’ll be starving all night.”
“Does that mean you—”
“Yes, Chenle.” You interrupted him. “Yes, I really, really like you too, which is why I want to make sure you eat.”
At that moment, Chenle realized that if he walked outside and randomly dropped dead, he’d be okay with it now that he’s gotten that confession out of you. There wasn’t a damn thing that could top that. Everything else in life would be subpar to today, so there was no point in trying.
You and Chenle ate in silence. He kept stealing glances at you, catching you doing the same to him. If all he had to do in order to get you to talk about your feelings with him was eat, he’d do it, albeit probably a bit too fast for his own good.
Chenle runs his fingers through his hair, his thumb tracing gentle shapes against the bare skin of your arm. These memories have no business popping up in the middle of the night. He has practice tomorrow. He’ll be so off his game, the other members will want to kill him.
Usually, he has no problem falling asleep, especially with you right beside him. Over the past year, you’ve probably spent more nights with him than you have at your own place. He teases you for it all the time, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.
Closing his eyes, he listens to the soft sounds of your breathing and allows himself to feel the way your body slots with his so easily. Everything about you is perfect. About the two of you together. He would toss and turn, but no way is he going to disturb you. Even if he can’t sleep, he’d never screw up your schedule on purpose.
“It’s so pretty.” You were in awe, staring at the sunset from Chenle’s backyard. He’d set up a picnic date for the two of you, and afterward, you were watching the sun fade below the treeline while lying on top of a red blanket.
His fingers were intertwined with yours, something that had become so normal for you. Two weeks since his confession, and it was the second date he planned. He wondered, obsessed over, even, what your thought process was on all of this. Were you happy? Did he make you happy?
He wanted to kiss you when he confessed to you. And while he came close to it on your first date, he decided against it. It had to be perfect. Nothing was good enough for you in his mind, especially when all he wanted was to make sure you knew just how he felt about you.
How was he supposed to tell you that?
He’d already said he fell for you, but that didn’t begin to cover it. Not really. You made him want to put in effort, made him crave your happiness like it was the very oxygen he breathed. At the same time, he didn’t want you to think he didn’t want to kiss you. Hell, he’d already dreamed of it, for fuck’s sake, so that definitely wasn’t the issue.
Lost in thought, he’s only snapped out of it by the way you rolled over, lying on your stomach so you can get a good look at his face. You rested your head on your right palm, your left finding his bicep.
“You’re so perfect,” he hummed, twirling your hair with his fingers. “Could look at you forever.”
“Some people might have an issue with that.” You laughed.
“We’re the only ones that matter,” he responded.
Your smile slowly faded, a look of longing replacing it as your gaze softened.
God, he wanted to kiss you. He needed to.
All thoughts of the perfect moment have fled from his brain. Any moment would be perfect as long as it’s you.
He sat up and you leaned forward, and before he knew it, his nose brushed yours. Your eyes fluttered shut in preparation. The heat of the sun sank into his skin. Your perfume wafted from you, intertwining with the air and suffocating him in the best ways. If he could pick one scent to smell for the rest of his life, it would be yours.
Was it normal to have these thoughts so early?
Why was he thinking of that right now? Literally the worst possible time.
“Can I?” he whispered, scared to ruin everything.
“Yes.”
As soon as the word left your mouth, he kissed you. Everything about you was soft, so he shouldn’t have been so surprised to find your lips the same way. His hands shook as he touched your waist.
He was already in big trouble. There wasn’t a single part of him that wanted to stop there. His heart thudded so loud, he was halfway sure you could hear it, too. It felt like sparks flew between you two, absolute electricity coursing through every single one of his veins, heating up his bloodstream and making the thought of pulling away from you the absolute worst case scenario.
You moved away first, gasping for breath. Chenle craved tugging you back to him. His body reacted to you in ways it had never reacted to anyone else. He didn’t want to take it too far, but he sure as hell didn’t want to stop, either.
He couldn’t describe the way you felt. The way you tasted. Everything about you was so heart-achingly perfect, he wanted to experience you all the time. He wanted to rewind time so he could kiss you again for the first time, and he’d do it over and over and over again.
Something about first kisses set him on fire. He was absolutely sure he’d kiss you more. In fact, he was seconds away from it. But the adrenaline coming from the very first brush of your lips on his wasn’t something he’d ever be able to recreate.
“Again.” You leaned in once more.
He met you in the middle eagerly, hand finding the back of your head before he turned you so you were lying on your back. Half of his weight pressed against you, but he did his best to keep himself lifted up so you weren’t uncomfortable.
Unforgettable heat swarmed him, the sun caressing his skin as your fingers gently traced down the back of his neck. Goosebumps formed, but he could hardly pay attention to them. The entire world was gone, and you were everything, the only person remaining in a sea of nothingness. He wanted you. Needed you.
This was technically your second kiss, but in his mind, it was still the first since they happened almost at the same time. He hadn’t stopped to take a breath in much too long, but he’d rather suffocate than separate from you.
He stopped when your breath hitched, completely lost in the sound. When he wasn’t focusing on your mouth anymore, he realized why—his hand had somehow found its way to your upper thigh. His face burned as he removed it.
“I didn’t…” he trailed off, scanning over your face for any hint of what you were feeling. “I didn’t mean to do that.”
You chuckled at him, pushing his shoulder. “You wish that excuse would work on me.”
The sky faded into a beautiful lilac color, the kind that only appeared when the sun was barely peeking over the horizon. Clouds drifted effortlessly, stars beginning to shine.
“Should we go inside?” Chenle asked. “It’ll get cold without the sun.”
Whenever he looked at you, he knew you were different. He couldn’t place how, but nobody else had ever made him feel the way you do. Like his heart was going to burst out of his chest while simultaneously stopping and also skipping every other beat. He didn’t even know how he was alive anymore.
In the last two weeks since his confession, the boys had told him how much happier he was. How he was striving with more effort lately and trying his best at any given moment of the day. You were his motivation. You made him want to be the absolute best he could be, and even as new as the relationship was, he’d already known you for months—he was nervous about you deciding you wanted something else. Someone who wasn’t him.
The moment before replayed in his head, and he heard that breath hitch on repeat while he awaited your answer. He did his best to stop thinking about it, but nothing worked. All he wanted to do was kiss you again, over and over and over until the literal end of time.
“Yeah.” You nodded. “Let’s go inside.”
His cheeks redden just thinking of that memory. The first time he ever kissed you, and he royally fucked up because his hand didn’t know how to stay put. At this point, it’s clear he’s not going to be able to fall asleep. He hates the idea of leaving you in bed alone, but he’s only going to disturb you if he doesn’t plan on sleeping.
Sliding away from you carefully, he quietly gets up and heads into the kitchen. He runs his fingers through his hair. His hands down his face. He must be sentimental today, because he can’t stop thinking about you for the life of him. Every memory from the last year pokes at his head, and he has no clue how to handle it.
Patting his cheeks, he heads over to the fridge to grab a water bottle. Photos of the two of you are framed up on the wall. There’s one picture in particular he always says is his favorite, but he refuses to tell you why.
The two of you were sitting on the floor, and you had the cutest glare on your face. He sees the adoration gleaming in your gaze even though you look about ready to strangle him. In your defense, you probably were. He lets out a tiny laugh, tracing over the frame. 
There’s even one with Chenle between you and Jisung, and a group picture with you and the boys. Chenle loves his friends dearly, and the way they’ve welcomed you with open arms says a lot about both your relationship with them and his potential future with you. Everyone in his life loves you. You’re the one they call when Chenle’s upset or if he’s off his game, and no matter when or where this is happening, you show up to make him feel better.
He could be having the worst day of his entire existence, and a simple ‘I love you’ passing from your lips has him forgetting everything shitty about the world. Looking back at the pictures, he’s drawn back into memory.
He heard the birds outside his window before he saw the gleaming sun. His eyes fluttered open while he groaned quietly at the sudden change of brightness. Your body was like a fireball, your skin searing hot against his, but it did little to bother him. His groan turned into a sigh of content, and he wrapped his arms around you tighter. Fingertips trailing down your bare spine, he kissed your forehead.
Three months together, and every night spent with you made him fall deeper in love. He’d never known peace as he did at that moment. No interruptions, just the two of you basking in each other’s embrace.
He could’ve stayed like that forever—he wanted to, but glancing at the clock, he realized how close it was to noon. Jaemin would be there soon, and the last thing Chenle needed was him in his house when you were naked in his bed.
He reluctantly got up, dressing himself before grabbing some clothes for you. You have a drawer, multiple, actually, but he picked his own T-shirt for you to wear. When he made it over to you, you were stirring.
“You got up.” You pouted at him, staring at him through half-closed eyes. “And you have clothes on.”
Chenle laughed. “Sorry, love. Jaemin will be here soon.”
“It’s that late?” you asked.
Chenle nodded, setting the clothes down next to you. He kissed you softly, gently, a kiss so barely there it left you leaning forward to try to continue it. Cupping your cheek, he brushed his thumb along your skin.
You didn’t need help getting dressed, but he did it anyway. He loved the way you looked in his T-shirts, and even though it’s long enough to cover you, no way he’d risk it. Once you were finished, the two of you got ready for the day. You brushed your teeth together, he watched you brush your hair, and by the time you’re done, Jaemin was walking in the front door.
The three of you sat on the floor around Chenle’s coffee table, playing a game. He can’t remember what the game was anymore, only that you were terrible at it and that he loved winning.
Jaemin teased both of you the whole time, ruffling Chenle’s hair on multiple occasions. As much as he’d love to deny it, Chenle enjoyed that Jaemin liked the two of you together. It was almost like an affirmation, even if he didn’t need one.
Being the professional picture-snapper he was, Jaemin took the picture now hanging up on Chenle’s wall. You, with your arms crossed over your chest and a big pout on your face, and Chenle, smiling widely at you with such adoration in his eyes it should’ve been impossible.
“Lele?” Your soft voice breaks him away from his memory. He turns to you quickly, heart instantly halting in his chest when he sees his shirt on you.
“What are you doing up?” he asks.
“I was gonna ask you that.” You rub your eyes, feet shuffling on the floor as you walk over to him.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he replies and takes you in his arms with ease. “Didn’t want to bug you, sunshine.”
You don’t respond. All you do is bury your head in his chest and breathe him in. He runs his fingers through your hair, kissing the top of your head. With all the lights off, the only illumination is the full moon outside as it casts shadows on the ground. The faint blue makes you that much more ethereal to him.
“You okay?” he whispers.
“Mm,” you hum in response. “This is nice.”
Chenle smiles. “Yeah, it is. Always is.”
After a bit of silence and rocking you gently, an idea sparks. He pulls his phone out of his pocket, finding the playlist he made specifically for when he thinks about you, and sets it on the counter. You stare at him in tired confusion, but when one of his arms wraps around your waist, you catch on.
“What are you doing?” Humor is laced in your voice, but the sweet look on your face tells him his actions are making you happy. That’s his goal, constantly. All he wants is to make you happy.
“Checking something off the bucket list,” he replies, slowly turning you to the soft beat.
“Something’s missing,” you say as he twirls you.
He steals a glance at the way his shirt rides up your legs, showing just a peek of your panties beneath it.
“What?” he asks, pulling you back to him.
“Sing to me.” You place your hand on his chest.
His heart betrays him at that moment. It rages, and he knows you can feel it. Chenle sings in front of thousands of people all the time, but something about you is different. Something about you right now is different.
“What’s going on up in there?” You run your fingers through his hair. “You’ve been all weird today.”
“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he admits. “Everything. From the moment we met up until this…it keeps repeating over and over again.”
“Welcome to my world,” you replied, grasping his shoulders. You massage them gently as you sway along with the music.
The confession from you makes him smile. At least he’s not the only one doing constant circles in his head. He calms a bit, and when a new song plays, he sings to you. Your body immediately relaxes into his, as if every stress you’ve ever had has left you without hesitation.
Chenle loves to sing. He does it all the time, and he only wants to keep getting better. To have someone like you as his partner, someone who supports him endlessly and genuinely loves his voice…it’s unparalleled.
He’s not sure how long the two of you are like this, or how long he’s singing for, but song after song, all he knows is that you’re smiling. You’re looking at him with unmatched adoration in your eyes, pure love. Nobody else has ever looked at him in this way, and he doesn’t want them to.
He wants to stay here with you and watch you love him in ways he’s never been loved before.
He stops. His singing fades out, and he furrows his eyebrows as he finally, finally realizes what’s been happening to him. You tilt your head, able to ask him questions without saying anything. His chest feels like it’s going to burst.
You’re it. 
You’re everything, and he’s going to marry you.
He’s going to spend the rest of his life striving to make sure you love him as much as you do right now, if not more.
It seems like you feel it, too. Your face softens and you reach up to trace along his cheekbone. He leans into your touch, chasing the warmth like it’s the last time he’ll ever feel it.
“I…” He takes a deep breath, shaking his head slowly. “I’m so fucking in love with you.”
“I know.” You grin so wide, Chenle almost thinks it’ll split your face in two.
“Good.” He brushes your hair behind your ear. “I hope I’m doing a good job in showing you that every day.”
You pause, hands trailing down from his cheeks to his shoulders. “I have never once doubted that you love me, Lele. Are you sure everything’s okay?”
“I promise you I’ve never felt better,” he replies. “Just checking in with you.”
“You do so much more than you realize. No matter how busy you are, you text me to tell me you love me or that you’re thinking about me. You practice non-stop with the boys but you still make an effort with me when you could easily use that as an excuse. There is not one thing I could ask for that you don’t already do.” You press a quick kiss to his lips. “I’ll never doubt you.”
“Sometimes I worry,” he admits. “You make me…want to be better. In every way possible. In my career, in my life, with you. And if I’m not being better every day, then I don’t deserve you.”
“Chenle.” You give him a pointed look. “When I think back to the first day we met, I remember how…how you acted from the first time you spoke to me. At the time, I really thought I was crazy, but I knew you’d be someone to me. You didn’t even know me, but you were so kind. And now that we’re here like this, you haven’t changed. There’s no getting better. You’re already the best.”
“How do you do that?” He chuckles, kissing your forehead.
“Do what?”
“Know exactly what to say.”
“That’s my special talent,” you tell him.
“We should get back to bed,” Chenle says, sleep weighing on him. “Meeting the boys tomorrow.”
He grabs his phone from the counter, his heart full and warm as he leads you back to his bedroom. This time, as he’s lying with you pressed to his chest, he’s able to fall into his dreamland.
Despite his lack of sleep, Chenle is full of energy the next day. He wakes up and makes you coffee just the way you like before sitting on the edge of the bed by your sleeping form. When he sets the cup on the nightstand, you stir, turning over to face him.
“You’re gonna be late,” you mumble, even though you have no idea what time it is.
Chenle chuckles, leaning forward to kiss your forehead. “I’ll see you in a bit, okay? You can stay here if you want. Wanted to tell you I love you before I left.”
“Love you, too,” you say with a tired smile, giving his hand a squeeze.
“Drink your coffee before it gets cold. I’ll grab dinner for us on my way back.”
Walking away from you feels like someone’s trying to rip his heart out of his chest. You’re an extension of him at this point, and after his sudden realization last night, all he wants to do is spend the day curled up with you.
Luckily for him, his day passes by pretty quickly. He got a lot done today, and he was proud of that. You’d be proud of him, too. He’s itching to get home and tell you everything that happened. Staying true to his word, he picks up your favorite takeout.
He’s going to be honest with you about what was going on with him yesterday. It’s the right thing to do—and in a perfect world, you’ll feel the same way he does. He hasn’t felt this nervous since he admitted his feelings for you. Even though that side of him feels worlds away now, he remembers it like it was yesterday.
But the restaurant isn’t the only stop he makes.
He’s shaking by the time he gets back. Is a year really enough time? It is for him, but what if you think he’s insane?
When he arrives, he’s not expecting what you’ve done at all. The main lights are off, but a dim golden glow from the strips along the wall and the candles illuminate the room enough. He sets the bag down on the table, completely forgetting about the food as he searches for you.
“(Y/N)?”
“You’re earlier than I thought you’d be,” you tell him, walking out of his bedroom while still putting in an earring.
His throat dries. He opens his mouth to speak, but no words could ever justify the way you look right now. You put on a dress, one of his favorites, and he’s in jeans and a T-shirt.
You kiss his cheek. “I figured you deserve something nice to come home to.”
“You’re my something nice.” He wraps his arm around your waist. “Should I change?”
“We’re not going anywhere.” You shake your head. “Just relax and enjoy your gorgeous girlfriend.”
“Oh, I can get on board with that.” He allows you to lead him back to the table.
Once he’s taking the food out of the bag, he keeps stealing glances at you. You put in all this effort for him, and he knows how much work it must’ve been to hang up all these lights. The golden glow looks ethereal against your skin.
“Before we eat, there’s something I wanted to talk to you about.” He clears his throat to stop it from collapsing in on itself, but it doesn’t work.
“What’s up?” You set your elbow on the table and rest your head on your palm. “Is everything alright?”
“Everything’s perfect, actually.” He takes a deep breath, reaching to grab your free hand. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” You bite back a laugh.
“You can’t make fun of me for what I’m about to tell you.” He gives you the most serious look he can muster, and you nod.
“I wouldn’t do that,” you reassure him. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“I…I want to love you forever.” He gulps. “And when I think of everything we’ve gone through and been through together, I seriously can’t imagine ever trying to have anyone else fill this spot you hold in my life.”
You perk up a bit, gaze staring into his. God, he loves how interested you are in what he has to say. How you’re listening to him so intently. His thumb rubs over your knuckles as he tries to think of the words he wants to use.
“I want to marry you. Call me crazy if you want, tell me you hate the idea, that’s fine, but I had to tell you. We obviously can’t get married now, or probably any time soon because of my contract, but I want you to know that it’s what I want. It’s what’s going to happen if you want it, too.”
You clear your throat and cover your mouth with your hand, eyes welling. Chenle’s heart aches seeing this reaction, knowing you feel as strongly as he does. He reaches into his pocket and puts a small box on the table in front of you.
“It’s not the real thing. Not yet. But I want you to know how serious I am, because if I was able to marry you, I would’ve done it yesterday.” He opens it, revealing a simple band in it. “Subtle enough where people won’t ask questions, but we’ll know.”
“Chenle, are you being serious right now?” You sniffle. “This is a very cruel prank.”
“The guys and I sat down together today to write a song. I think you’ll love it, so when we record it I’m sneaking you a copy. Anyway, we were there for twenty minutes, and words were just flowing out of me. I wrote about you. About how you make me feel, and I think anyone who knows about us will understand that when they listen to the song.”
He pauses to swallow past the lump in his throat.
“I want you. I want to marry you and spend the rest of my life proving to you why I deserve that. Let me put this ring on you, and this can be the start.”
You quickly wipe your face as you nod. He takes your left hand, grabs the ring out of the box, and slips it on your middle finger.
“One day, this will be real.” Chenle catches another one of your tears. “I love you. There is not one thing in this world that could change that.”
His heart pounds in his chest as he watches your reaction. He wants to touch you and kiss you after pouring his thoughts out to you, but he needs to make sure you’re feeling the same way. The last thing he wants to do is overwhelm you.
His palms are sweaty and he can barely sit still. You groan, giving one last aggressive swipe below your eyes before you launch up from your chair and end up in his lap. You bury your head in his neck, squeezing him tighter than you should. He instinctively wraps his arms around your waist, softly chuckling at your outburst.
“You better not change your mind.” Cupping both of his cheeks, you try your best to look angry. “If you do, I’m marrying you anyway.”
His own vision blurs at the sight of you. You love him as much as he loves you, and you want to be with him forever.
You want to be with him forever.
The emotions rioting inside him surprise even him, and he blinks quickly to try and suppress the tears. It’s no use, because as soon as you notice, you start crying again. He groans and drops his head back on the chair, squeezing you closer to him.
“You’ll be the death of me,” Chenle says.
“Kiss me, you idiot.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice. His mouth finds yours, both of you falling into each other’s rhythm. Saltiness from your tears lingers on your lips. He weaves his fingers through your hair, but no matter what he does, you’re just not close enough.
Pulling away from you, he rests his forehead on yours. “You should eat, sunshine.”
“You expect me to be able to eat after all of that?” You furrow your eyebrows. “I’m afraid that’s not possible.”
“You’ll be sad if it gets cold,” he reminds you.
“I don’t think I’ll ever be sad again,” you whisper.
All thoughts escape him. Nothing else exists except for you, wrapped around him like a damn koala bear. He rests his hand on your thigh and lets your words sink deep into him.
Moments like these are hard to explain, he thinks. He’s only like this around you, so lost in his connection with you that he’s got nothing else on his mind. Anything and everything you say to him is tattooed in the darkest ink on his soul, until he’s covered in everything he wants to be for you.
“Promise me you’ll always look at me like that.” You break the silence, running your fingers through his hair and smiling.
“I promise.” He nods, barely realizing how he’s leaning forward.
Your eyes flutter shut as he inches closer. He kisses you softly, almost as if he fears he’ll break you. His fingers splay out across the small of your back and he traces shapes into the soft fabric of your dress. You’re overwhelming. His love for you is, too. So much so, he feels as if he’s going to burst out of his skin. He’s going to wake up and everything will have been a dream, because there’s no way he’d ever done anything in his life to deserve someone like you.
You hum into his mouth, rolling your hips once. His breathing stutters as his first instinct is to lift toward you. At first, he wants to stay like this, you clinging onto him like you’d be lost without him, but when you grind down a second time, he feels a twitch in his pants.
It’s been over a week since the last time he’s been inside you thanks to his schedules. And now you’re on top of him, wearing his favorite dress of yours, and kissing him like you’ll never be able to feel him again after tonight.
He’s tired, but he’s never too tired for you. Brushing your hair away, he leans down to kiss your neck, licking the expanse of your soft skin. Your pulse thunders beneath his tongue, and he has to fight the urge to bite down.
Touching you like this is different when he knows he’ll never lose you. You’re his forever.
His lips press against the sensitive spot below your ear, and the short moan escaping you just about sends him up the wall. When he pulls away to get a good look at you, your eyes are dark, lips already swollen from the way he kissed you.
He tries to catch his breath while he silently asks you if this is what you want. You nod, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. Standing, he lifts you up until your legs are secure around his waist, and he grabs your ass with one hand and the back of your head with the other.
Mouths attached, he doesn’t separate from you until he’s setting you down on his bed. He barely has time to appreciate the candles you lit in here, too, the soft scent of vanilla flooding his senses. You already try to push his T-shirt up, anything to feel his skin on yours. He obliges, pulling it over his head before returning to kissing you like his life depended on it. When your hands find the button on his jeans, he grabs your wrist.
“Patience, baby.” Chenle runs his fingers up and down your thigh. “We have the rest of our lives. Let me take my time with you tonight.”
Just like that, you’re putty in his hands. He smirks at the realization. Sneaking his touch up your leg, the hem of the dress moves to accommodate him. He stops when he feels the lace of your panties.
“Did you dress up for me twice, sunshine?” he hums.
“Always,” you say, shamelessly staring at his lips. “Do you love me, Chenle?”
His whole body vibrated from those words. They made him feel at a frequency he hadn’t quite reached yet, and all he wanted to do was rip that damn dress off.
“More than anything.”
He can’t really say it’s ‘like second nature’ anymore. There’s nothing second about it. This is you. Anything to do with you is first nature, no matter what it is. His world revolves around you, everything he does is based on what you want, and he wouldn’t change that in any way.
“Show me,” you whisper, so intoxicating he almost crumbles to his knees right in front of you.
How embarrassing that all it takes is two words to have him give in to you. He’s straining against his pants now, his cock aching to be free and buried inside you.
“Don’t worry. I will.” He kisses you again, soft and sweet like his hand isn’t so, so close to your dripping, eager core. Heat radiates from you, and all he wants is to be consumed by it.
He drags your panties down your legs, nails gently scratching your skin on the way down. Your chest rises and falls quickly as you try to regain your breath, but he loves the way you’re so desperate for him. The way you want him just as much as he wants you.
He doesn’t want to be patient anymore. Every cell in his body is urging him to connect with yours, but he wants to take care of you. That side of him always wins, otherwise both of you would probably be done already.
His finger dances along your entrance. He inhales sharply as your wetness coats his skin. You move your hips toward him, practically begging him for stimulation. He teasingly nudges your clit, pleasantly surprised by the way your body jolts.
Mouth brushing yours, he takes the second of distraction to slide two fingers inside you. As your lips part to release a moan, he mirrors the action, eyes fluttering shut as he slowly, slowly thrusts his hand.
Your walls squeeze so hard, he curses. He could fuck you a thousand times, and you’d still be as tight as you are right now. His heart goes straight into overdrive, but all the blood in his body is shooting down to his cock. He’s painfully hard, rocking back and forth gently.
He kisses you, lips working against yours in a perfect harmony. Your sounds are his favorite. He loves knowing it’s him making you feel this way, that he has the power to make your knees weak and your pussy throb.
He lets out a moan when he scissors his fingers, trying his best to prepare you. God, you’re so warm and wet and tight, he isn’t sure if he’ll be able to last long tonight. His pace quickens, sounds of your slickness filling the room.
You call out his name, back arching as you grasp desperately at his shoulders. He leans in and kisses your cheek, making sure to press his palm into your clit every time he’s knuckle deep. 
“You’re perfect, baby,” he whispers with his lips against your ear, voice rough. “I love you so much. So fucking much.”
You tense, pussy clamping down hard on his fingers as your hips buck. He swears he can see the pleasure running up your spine in the way you arch and shake. Your nails dig into his shoulders, but he’s not in the right mind to care. Your mouth opens, sounds pouring out as you finish. He loves you all the time, but one of his favorite looks on you is when he watches you orgasm—your face so overcome with pleasure he caused…he would never get enough of it.
He keeps moving until he’s sure you’ve come down from your high. When he brings his fingers up to his mouth to suck your juices off, you watch longingly, the dark look in your gaze enough to have his cock twitching in his pants.
You slide off the bed, forcing him to take a couple steps back. He’s not sure what you’re going to do at first. Your struggle to reach your zipper, and as much as he wants to bend you over with the dress still on, he wants to be gentle with you tonight. He doesn’t get to make love to you often, and that’s all he’s going to do tonight.
Instead of watching you attempt to reach it, he turns you around and pulls you to him until your back is against his chest. His hand is splayed out across your stomach, holding you so you feel how hard he is.
“I’m going crazy,” you mutter, dropping your head back. “I need you so bad.”
He moves your hair out of his way, kissing the base of your neck quickly before he unzips you. Moving slowly on purpose, he lets his finger drag along your spine on the way down. You shiver, pushing yourself back into him.
“I’m gonna make love to you.” He finally lets himself bite down on your shoulder as he nudges the straps down. “For the rest of our lives. Nobody but me.”
“Nobody but you,” you respond, allowing the dress to pool at your feet.
He turns you around, hands immediately finding your ass and squeezing it. Within seconds, he has your bra unclasped and across the room. “So beautiful.”
When your hands find his jeans, he doesn’t stop you this time. You push them down his legs, desperate to have him inside you. Once his jeans are off, you palm him through his boxers, and he needs you so badly, that simple touch almost finishes him off. That would’ve been embarrassing.
He takes off the remaining fabric separating you two before leading you over to the bed. You lie in the middle, and he climbs on top of you. He kisses you passionately, tongue already dancing with yours, both of you more than ready. His cock is so hard, he’s only half convinced he won’t cum as soon as he’s in.
He nudges your clit with his leaking tip, moving down to your entrance to apply just enough pressure before pulling away. You whine, desperate for more.
“Chenle, please.”
His head dips down as he continues teasing you, wrapping his lips around your nipple. You whimper, running your fingers through his hair. Having you so desperate for him makes him want to give you everything you’re asking for, but something makes him wait.
“Please,” you cry out, lifting your hips up. “Need you.”
He’s ready to fall apart from you words alone. Pulling away from your chest, he reaches down to line himself up with you. He watches you closely as he pushes his throbbing cock into your quivering pussy. Your eyes roll back as you arch into him.
Your walls swallow him, velvet clamping down on him. He clenches his jaw as he bottoms out and fists the sheets next to your head.
“So perfect,” he whispers, kissing your jawline.
One of his favorite things about you is how unafraid you are to look at him. Pleasure weighs on your eyelids, and you try your best not to close them, but even like this, you never look away.
He’s fully inside you, his cock seated within your fluttering walls. The last thing he wants to do is overwhelm you, so he gently rocks his hips to help you adjust. He kisses you everywhere he can reach.
“You always take me so well,” he praises you, nipping the base of your neck.
He’ll never get over how perfectly he fits between your legs, like this space was made for him.
“Move,” you tell him, smacking his shoulder.
He lets out a soft chuckle, but lowers his mouth to yours as he starts a steady pace. You squeeze him so tight, it’s like your body doesn’t want to let him out of you. He pulls out until his tip is barely inside, and then pushes back in just as slowly. It wreaks havoc on your body, your wetness squelching every time he moves.
He wants you to feel all of him. Feel the entirety of his cock rubbing your walls with every thrust.
Somehow, it’s hotter this way. A thin sheen of sweat covers his skin as he takes his time with you. Sure, he gets sweaty when he fucks you, but nothing compares to the close intimacy of love making—his chest brushing against yours with every thrust, long, sweet moans filling the otherwise quiet bedroom.
“You sing so pretty,” Chenle mutters, tonguing the sensitive spot below your ear. “You like the way I feel?”
Before he can even process what you’re doing, you wrap your legs around his waist and roll until you’re on top of him. He’s flat on his back, eyes flitting along your body like he hasn’t had a real chance to see it yet.
Candle light illuminates your skin, and the sight makes his cock twitch. He runs his hands along your sides, squeezing your hips.
Chenle likes being in control. He likes guiding you in a way that has you both in shambles by the end, and he truly underestimated how beautiful you’d look on top of him. You lift up, teasing him as slow as he was moving with you, but between the sight and the feeling, he feels an all too-familiar tingling sensation at the base of his length.
It’s too soon for him, so he decides to tug you down, holding you there while his eyes close and his head thuds against the mattress. He doesn’t need to say a word to you.
“Chenle.” You stroke a hand down his chest. “It’s okay. You don’t need to hold back for me.”
“Just…need a second.” He gulps.
When he finally catches his breath, he sits up, chest pressing against yours.
“This was supposed to be about you,” he says, moving back slightly to fit his hand between the two of you. “Showing you my love and everything.”
He finds your clit with his thumb, staring at you intently as your wetness makes it easy for him to rub circles. His other hand still firmly grips your waist, which only allows you to squirm instead of bouncing on him like you crave to do.
“I need to move,” you whimper, grinding down. “Please.”
He nods, loosening his grip on you. You brace yourself on his shoulders, finally taking his cock the way you want it. His nails dig into your thigh while he continues his work on your bud, and it only spurs you on. You move faster, no doubt trying to chase your orgasm.
His moans get louder, matching yours. If his hands weren’t so occupied, he’d want to squeeze your ass or tweak your nipples. Anything to bring you higher. He changes the patterns his thumb rubs, and it’s like a jolt of electricity runs through your body.
You curse, dropping your head on his shoulder as you nod. “Don’t stop, Lele.”
With both of you hanging so close to the edge, he waits until you’re sitting back down on his cock to buck his hips up. He doesn’t want to finish first, but he’s so close, all the warning signs of his impending high are getting far too real.
“Gonna cum,” he tells you, releasing your thigh to grab your ass.
Your walls clamp down on him hard, a long, pleasured sound escaping you as you grind down on him. Back arching, your head falls back. Your orgasm hits both you and Chenle like a freight train, and within seconds, everything inside him explodes, and he’s spilling his cum deep inside you while telling you over and over again that he loves you.
You crumple into his chest. He runs his fingers through your hair, whispering praises to you between head kisses.
“I’m gonna lay you down, sunshine,” he says.
You nod, and he turns you so he can put your back on the mattress. He carefully pulls out of you, putting his boxers back on before going into the bathroom to grab you a towel. This is one of his favorite ways to see you. Your eyes are closed, hands on your cheeks. You look like he’s fucked all the energy out of you, and he loves that he has the capability to do that.
He cleans you up, then grabs a clean pair of panties for you and one of his T-shirts.
“I have an idea,” he says.
“What is it?” You wrap your arms around him.
“You pick whatever movie you want, and I’ll go warm up your dinner?” He raises his eyebrows at you.
You fake a gasp. “Are you saying you’re going to feed me in bed?”
“After all of that, I’d agree to just about anything you want.” He chuckles when you shove his shoulder. Grabbing your hand, he twirls the band on your finger. “Wait here for me?”
When he walks out of the room, he stops at the doorway to watch you excitedly lunge for the remote. It doesn’t take long for him to warm up the food, turn off the lights, and blow out the candles in the kitchen.
The rest of the night is spent with the two of you sitting against the headboard, laughing along to your favorite movie while eating your favorite takeout. So many thoughts have come and gone from Chenle’s brain in the past couple days alone, but he’s more than happy he gets to sit here with you every night for the rest of his life.
He’s lost in your laugh and the way you smile at him and how you make his heart race with the simplest things. None of the other members knew about the ring he bought you, but he’ll tell them soon.
After the food is gone, Chenle cleans it up. There’s still half a movie left, so when he gets back, he pulls the comforter back so you can cuddle up to him for the remainder. Even though the candles have long since been put out, vanilla still clouds the air.
“Love you,” Chenle whispers, kissing your temple.
“Love you, too.” You sigh in content, resting your head on his chest.
He knows that means you’re only seconds from sleep, and he rubs your arm soothingly. The movie continues to play, but neither of you are paying attention anymore—you’re asleep, and Chenle’s thinking about what kind of wedding dress you’ll wear.
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notyourmajesty · 7 months
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Head empty no thoughts save for one: Henry's self-soothing shoulder dips
So a lot of people did point out certain self-soothing gestures Henry does when he's very stressed or panic mode...or sometimes even as a bit of a habit that keeps him grounded. Like fiddling with his ring or tilting his head to a side.
On my last few rewatches I've also started to think that Henry also has a tendency to fold in on himself when he's feeling overwhelmed. I've only noticed it in two scenes so far, and I've been making a connection since.
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The first time I noticed it was in the lake/almost-confession scene, where Alex speaks about a possible future unaware that the conversation is sending Henry into a panic. As soon as Alex tells him about the rope in his chest that keeps pulling him close to Henry, we see his shoulders move a little closer together, utter devastation written all over his face (I don't know whether this gif accurately shows that exact moment, but if it doesn't, here's the scene).
I feel like this is something he does as a self-soothing gesture. Something he does when he is aware he is getting into panic mode and needs to feel safe without anyone else noticing. Like he can feel the walls closing in on him, the exact thing he feared ("I can't afford for you to fall in love with me") this close to becoming a reality. His most fervent dream and his deepest nightmare all rolled in one.
So he does what he can do before Alex speaks that terrifying truth into existence. He folds in on himself, and jumps.
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I noticed a similar version of this action in the scene after the V&A dance, when Henry wakes up in Alex's arms the next morning. The context and the intent here, though, is very different. Often, for me, the most striking thing was always Alex's tight grip on Henry's wrist, reflecting both his fear of abandonment and the heartbreak he experienced when Henry left. And of course, Henry's little smile when he wakes up and remembers.
But on the rewatches I noticed that familiar little shoulder-dip action again, and this time the meaning of that gesture seemed to be that he DID feel safe. That Alex's presence, and touch, makes him feel safe. That Alex's arm around him was a reassurance he didn't expect to gain, that this is a moment that is all his to savour. He finds comfort in that embrace, and if anything that little shoulder-gesture will only pull Alex's arm closer to him.
Edit: @hopelessromanticlittleshit and @tell-a-tale also pointed out a scene of Henry's during Alex's official White House statement about the leaks, when he (and Shaan on his behalf) are being silenced by the "wrinkled old white man" representing Buckingham Palace.
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There is some shoulder action here too - again, in a different way and with a different context. In the other two scenes the gesture signifies either an attempt to protect himself or to an expression that he feels reassured and safe. Here his shoulders slump and his head tilts slightly- as a sign of utter defeat. Here he recognises the powerlessness of his position; he isn't even permitted a voice in a situation that has affected him. The head tilt here is a signifier of how disconnected he feels from this entire conversation.
This is a man who feels lost...and who feels he has lost a battle he's been fighting his whole life. (GOSH do I have things to say about Henry's Kensington sequences during Alex's speech!!!)
This also makes me think of the boys' relationship with touch. I've always felt like...of the two, Alex is the more obviously tactile one. It shines through every scene he has with every character. He snuggles with his mother after coming out to her. Nora and Alex sit close together in gestures of casual platonic intimacy. Even with Zahra, his "mean friend" you have that moment when a grateful Alex says "I could kiss you!" and her immediate response is "touch me and die". Even with the young women at the New Year party, he is comfortable with their touches, accepting kisses from them in the joy and exuberance of ringing in a new year.
With Henry, even at the height of his resentment, Alex touches his shoulder with his cake covered hand, bridges the gap between them during the interviews quicker, grabs his hand over a box of Cornettos. He's the one who wants to talk after Henry's kissed him and he's the one who makes the first move. Touch is important to Alex. It's how he seeks comfort, it's also how he seeks to soothe his loved ones.
Henry on the other hyperfocuses on the environment they're in, the people around them. Forever under the pressure of being gawked at, having his picture taken, his privacy never really his. The only people we see him close to are Percy and Bea - and in the one scene that Henry and Bea have together their touches on either others hands and arms are tentative, delicate. Careful.
(In a lot of ways Alex breaks through this barrier early on even as someone Henry barely talks to - the cakegate scene is FULL of little touches and pokes and jabs the two exchange, even though they're built up in the story as being antagonistic to each other at this point)
Hell, the first time Henry allows himself to be reckless and actually kiss Alex the way he has so desperately wanted to for years, he beats himself up over it, and punishes himself by avoiding any contact with Alex.
The few times Alex approaches to touch him without a second thought, Henry quickly, almost remorsefully, alerts Alex of their surroundings. But in the privacy of their rooms, he touches Alex with a certain desperation, a certain need to grab hold of the few moments that will belong only to them.
Alex is generous with his touch. Henry hoards the few moments of touch he gets like a priceless unexpected treasure that he has no hope of ever getting a second time.
I swear I intended this gd post to be about Henry's shoulder-dips only but somehow it turned into a different beast altogether 🤧
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