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amandayuebing · 3 years

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Silver linings and blessings in disguise

It's been a challenging time juggling Dad's recent health problems in the middle of a pandemic, as well as with a wedding planned around the corner.

Dad's stroke happened on a Thursday morning, 3 weeks ago.

I wasn't able to go into the ER with him, despite his memory loss and problems with speech, as there was a strict "no visitors allowed" rule due to Covid. I anxiously waited from home, for phone calls from his doctors to ask me questions about his history and condition, and to provide me updates.

At the same time, I had my phone blowing up that day (and for days afterwards) from phone calls from relatives. Word spread fast, they wanted to confirm what had happened and were there to try and give their support from afar.

After hours of waiting, I received a phone call to confirm the CT scan they did for him didn't show signs of a stroke; the doctors told us it might have been a "mini-stroke" ; not a full stroke, but an early warning sign one was on the way. But that didn't mean he hadn't had a stroke. Whilst a CT scan was a good indicator of whether or not a stroke had occurred, an MRI would create a clearer image of his brain to confirm this.

The hospital was so busy, he was discharged on the very same day. I was told to make a booking with his GP to receive a referral for an MRI with clearer imaging of his brain, so we could confirm it wasn't a stroke.

By the time he had been discharged, it was already past 5pm and he was tired, scared, and irritable, and just wanting rest at home. I called many GPs the first thing, the next morning, and a lot of them were booked out, not seeing new patients or told me, "why aren't you taking him to the hospital if you think he's had a stroke?!" 🙄🙄🙄...

Finally, when I got him an appointment, it was late in the afternoon (on a Friday), and I wasn't able to make an MRI appointment for him until Monday morning when they confirmed he had indeed had a stroke.

He's been recovering well since, and it's been taking a while for his neurologist, occupational therapist, speech therapist and physiotherapist to be available, but I understand everyone's doing what they can at this time. Things were a lot harder when Dad first had his stroke, especially because stress would trigger temporary memory loss and speech issues, but thankfully things are slowly getting better.

In some ways, this difficult time has brought many blessings in disguise.

Dad's stroke has also forced me to reprioritise some things in life, and reinforce existing ones.

Whilst any type of stroke is serious, we're thankful that the stroke Dad had was relatively small, and he'll be able to make a full recovery. We're taking it from the perspective that this was a warning to him, that he needs to take better care of his health, and a reminder to us to treasure life and our loved ones.

(Thankfully) all the phone calls have slowed down, but I'm still thankful for every single phone call and message I received reaching out to us.

We've been a lot healthier at home, and recently celebrated a special occasion with this melon "cake" that wasn't a cake at all 😂❤:

Whilst previously, I was more anxious about not wanting to upsetting people (even if I didn't particularly like them), taking care of myself (so I can also, in turn, take better care of my family) has been my main priority.

I blocked out a lot of the noise in my life which I realised was making me unhappy, and since then, I've learnt the benefits of not giving energy to people and things who drain my energy. I've gotten a lot better at saying "no", even if it's just to myself.

Whilst family time has always been important, we prioritise it even more now, to show each other throughout the day we care about each other.

Whilst obviously the pandemic and lockdowns are not a positive thing, the silver lining is how we get to spend even more family time together. We've been watching movies and Chinese dramas together and recently found two really good ones we enjoyed/are enjoying; "A Rational Life", and "A Thousand Goodnights".

Also, we still have a lot to look forward to, such as our wedding celebration with friends and family, and Tony and me moving into our new home. The planning has been stressful at times, but at the same time, I also feel warm and fuzzy knowing we'll have our very own family home together soon. I know Dad is also very proud of me for finding someone who will take care of me like Tony, and that we're finally getting married.

#silver linings #blessings in disguise #personal #mlvsm #my life is very shoujo manga

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