#this isnt really a guide to age but you can use it as one and kind of an authenticity thing ig

[privitivium]

YES YES YES!!! CHUBBY MIDDLE AGE DILF!!!! GOD I LOVE YOUR MIND YOU UNDERSTAND ME SO WELL!

IM DYING FOR SMUT OF HIM ALREADY 😫

I loveee the concept of edgy darling and Yan Dilf... He's so clueless on how to deal with and hang out with you and just let you take the lead all together....

so cute i love you you fucking get me. subbot yan dilf w amab domtop reader ! Hooray!

yan dilf with an angsty adult darling who he is lowkey clueless with is such a thought.

yan dilf who uses bonding techniques with you that he's honed since his kids' birthㅡall adults - only having one tween in in his huge house.. dilf who's all weirded out by his own odd behavior around you - knowing that he's usually suave and such a damn smooth talker around othersㅡwhy the hell cant he use his tactics on you? the hell did you do to him-?!?! he isnt complaining, no... but he would like it if he would stop "embarrassing himself" in front of his cool younger boyfriend who he's obsessed with. ugh! ( not even boyfriends, yet he calls you such a thing. nerd. )

him taking you out to these fancy places, fancy bars, hoping to catch your interest further; knowing that you at least have some sort of crush on him - ( he really hopes you dont see him as a father away from home ) being so close to him and all... yan dilf straight faced jerking off while imagining your fingertips trailing over his back while in the comfort of his room. wanting you to watch while he does it. would you like the sight? would you do it for him? he can't stop these disgusting thoughts no matter how hard he tries when he's around you, much to his chagrin.

ㅡhaving to sit awkwardly, hiding his lower half under the table when at a cafe or restaurant and speed to the bathroom while your face is turned to either fix the problem or splash cold water on his face. he cant help the way his tummy gets butterflies when his hand brushes against yours while walking ㅡ and he can't stand it. you make him act like a younger ... prettier version of himself. his highschool - college-self. making him feel all these fucking feelings again... it's so intoxicating. you. you, you, you,,,,,...

him being all lowkey awkward around you but it comes off as rigid and uncomfortable. just because he likes you so much and he's unsure of what to do with himself - and his imagination isnt much help. wondering..,,,, as he glances inbetween your legs,,, what it would feel like. wondering what kind of toy he has to use on himself to mock your dick, on his own time, caught up in his thoughts - riding a thick silicone cock messy with lube and his spit, and whining for you;; all alone. muscly, sturdy frame and stern face, simply intimidating with his demeanor - it was him being shy is all...

ㅡthen actually fucking him. plowing into him at a leisure pace at his place, in his bed - house empty. him clamping down so eagerly, so unused to the size of you, the dildo he had been fucking himself is so puny - the warmth you provide him making him all warm and fuzzy and - fuck, he's drooling. looking up at you with glazed eyes as you guide him to look at you in a hunched over form of missionary... his face burning with embarrassment and arousal yet keeping eye contact as you trail your hand down his jaw, hips methodically plapping against his as you gently take hold of the base of his thick, half limp cock that was more chub than length. stroking his half-hard cock gently, before softly taunting; sure are pretty... looking up at me with that pouty expression... you want something from me? do you want me to cum inside? be defiled, old man? you would look even prettier, can you imagine that?

ㅡpretty? yeah, right. but the mere tone of your voice and the way you compliment him makes him cum all the while. he's weak to you and he can't help it. he hates it. he fucking loves it. he does - he really does. he's so comfortable... too comfortable with you. nearly having a hand on your inner thigh everytime you sit in public together, so infuriatingly close to your prick.

ㅡhe knows what hes doing. and he's proud to say he has a little of that suaveness back just to tease you like this... but it doesnt end as well as he hoped. having to sob out of pleasure as you fuck him over his dinner table after what he thought was a cute dinner date with just the two of you in the house, turning into a fuckfest as you make him cum over and over until his dick could not take it any longer-! scoffing in amusement, shoving him to sit down, glass of water at his side as you so eagerly dip down in-between his legs - lapping at his dirty shrunken cock. uh huh.

chubby dad bod you feel up bro,,,. hands roaming over his abdomen,,, grazing and groping at his fat pecs - thick arms you can happily hold onto or nonchalanty squeeze,,

he lets you, wordlessly. letting you the lead with everything - letting you abuse his holes however you deem fit and letting you rake your fingers through his hair in a public display of affection and letting you touch him wherever, whenever you wanted ㅡ because you at least know what you're doing. unlike him - which is hard to admit... and, him not even having to stalk you because you were constantly around him, something that he truly cherishes. but ,,, he does plant cameras in your place when to you happen to have him over and disappear into the bathroom. he's just a little protective over you, wanting to make sure you're eating right, taking care of yourself right - and he's jerking off to the livefeed of you sitting on your couch.

#yan dilf....... #male reader #x male reader #top male reader #x top male reader #dom male reader #x dom male reader #yandere oc x reader #yandere x male reader #yandere m x m reader #yandere male x male reader #yandere male x reader

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for not making any of my characters, that I have to crank out daily, pansexual/polysexual/omnisexual specifically and only making them bi?

🏳️‍🌈👶🏼 so i can recognize this later lmao also I'm not panphobic or anything, this isn't about the validity of the label, pan is fine.

So i (20snb bi) have a project I'm working on where I take all the characters from a specifc media I'm into and pair them up with each other to make every possible ship kid from every possible ship(excluding characters who are kids themselves or are related or something, that shit is gross). Basically taking every character and pairing them up with another and creating a kid I think they'd have. Its a big project with lots of characters and I'm easily over 400 at this point. I really enjoy this, even if I'm not even 25% complete.

However I set a schedule for myself that at least one ship kid needs to come out each day which, considering I draw them, color them and give them some development and some even have siblings, (The refs themselves easily take me an hour to an hour and a half) I have to make lots of them quickly to keep up with my daily grind. I've been doing this project for over a year and although it's stressful, I can get them out quickly with breaks for myself.

Their character sheets all have some pretty basic info like their name, gender, pronouns, personality and more but it also includes their sexuality/orientation. I have a pretty basic list of options for what their sexuality will be: straight, lesbian, gay, Enbian, bi, Aro, ace and aroace with a few random things like polyam, WLW and a good amount of the something-loving-something/juvelic terms. I did this because, well, there's not many entirely unique orientations outside of them and although I love mogai/xenogenders and complex identities, I dont want to potentially drag up discourse or bring problems to my budding art blog over it. Its just not worth it to me to turn something I really care about on its head, even if I like microlabels.

In this case, I'm using bi as an umbrella term as most of the other terms share the same definition with slight variations in wording or action but not much difference in practice. We all like everyone, it's basic stuff. However, apparently this is a problem.

I've gotten one or two anons asking me questions about my guides asking some kind stuff like is this lesbian ship kid a butch or femme or Is this picture of them now or just at the age you put on the ref and other harmless stuff. Then things got rude with some Nbphobia but thrice now I've gotten asks:

1. Asking snarkily if im a panphobe

2. insulting me for not specifically writing pan or Omni and just writing bi.

3. Saying that I "clearly dont care about pansexual representation." Then brought up how my primary oc is native american so i clearly care about representation but that oc used to be a sona and I'm native?? Its confusing. (And Lowkey racist shit to just assume any native character is a "diversity quota" character instead of just a person existing but I digress-)

Im not pan, im bi so ig these people assume I'm not cool with pan people which isnt true? I have nothing aginest them, they are just pretty similar and I dont feel like it matters if they are specfically bi or pan or poly or any other label. I don't go into details like that for any other sub-group, not even pronouns and I included combinations and some common Neopronouns. I understand the importance of representation but my project has less than 50 people looking at it every day, Im not netflix or something. I'm one guy on the most LGBT blogging site with a big project and very little audience, I'm not showing people who wouldn't already know what pan is that pansexuality exists.

This project isn't that deep considering the characters in question aren't human/dont have human characteristics.(no it's not hazbin/helluva) Also ive never spoken about lgbt discourse or stated anything remotely close to it beyond the guides just passively having characters who are an LGBT identity. I've not even mentioned all the potentional orientations they could have so I'm not sure where/why this came up in the first place. The most politcial things ive said are calling out a creator in my fandom who outed themselves as a transphobe and mentioning im pro-palestine. That's it.

I mean this is pretty low stakes, I can just block these people and be done with it and this some seriously online shit but I just wanna check.

Am I being an asshole for just writing bi instead of specifying their mspec label because I have to produce characters quickly and I don't see enough of a difference to warrant a change/specification that would ultimately slow and clog an already stressful and complex project?

I dont think I am but idk lol

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[ryemackerel]

any tips for starting on digital art? I've got a little wacom tablet and downloaded krita and I'm having fun but it feels like theres some kind of barrier that isnt letting me transfer traditional skills I've learnt over to digital

hey!! so i used to be exactly like this a ton of years back. my first time really getting serious with digital was around 2015, but i definitely remember how difficult it was transferring my traditional art skills to digital. here’s some advice :]

at first, although it will be difficult to get over that barrier, LOTS of practice will help you get into the groove of things again. going to digital art after being solely traditional changed my style a lot to begin with. with new mediums/programs, your art style is *bound* to change a little bit. at first i didn’t really like how my digital style looked, but i started to realize the more i drew, the more my art skills started to shine through. switching up mediums (ex: from traditional to digital) might even help you acquire a new art style that you might like :D

another thing! before i used a tablet for the first time back in 2022, i used to love just drawing with my finger on my phone and use pencil + paper. as soon as i started using a wacom tablet, the feeling was incredibly weird? though, i always liked to treat my tablet as its own pencil and paper.

trying to visualize this helped me immensely with traditional to digital. since you did traditional beforehand, i think starting off with a pen and tablet is a great gateway to starting digital art. pen+paper vs pen+tablet is almost identical to each other, the only thing being that the pen+tablet is more digital.

and! with digital, there is absolutely *no limits* to what you can put on your canvas. i highly implore you to experiment with as many brushes as you like, edit your art with effects, add textures, and go crazy with the shading and lighting. :) eventually you will definitely find a brush you’ll love, and from there things will feel much more comfortable to figure out.

again!! this takes a lot of practice and effort to really make your art skills shine through, and it will take a while to finally get used to it and make a piece you’re going to like. but eventually you might find yourself enjoying digital art, and i hope this advice guides you along that journey <3

————

(somewhat related but my switch from wacom tablet to ipad was SO rocky. it took ages for me to try and transfer my tablet skills to my ipad, and procreate felt uncomfortable for me to use. however, eventually i got over that barrier and now i use procreate and ipad as my main sources :] hopefully this helps inspire you)

(left: november-december 2022 vs right: november-december 2023!! one full year of using procreate!)

(the old ones had duller colors and less defined sharpness/lines. they look cool but i wasn’t proud of how dull they were. in the new ones, i feel like ive started gaining a mastery of the program and my art is now super vibrant again :] )

#ryemackerel asks

[pansyfemme]

Hello i am not new to being transgender but I am new to the packers- you posted about packing harness- what is that all about?

Is it like strapon but less thick? Where did you buy? Any tips or information about packing? What is material of fake penis?

So sorry for bad english is second language! Bright day and good health for you!

no problem! so a packer is different from a strap on as its not usually used for sex, it’s something you wear under your clothes. Like how a strap-on mimics an erect penis, a packer mimics a soft one. It’s usually squishy and soft to the touch, and most commonly made out of silicone. It may or may not be actually sculpted to resemble a penis. The purpose of a packer is so trans men and other people who lack a bulge in the front of their pants can have one. It essentially mimics how a soft penis looks under clothes. It can be extremely euphoric for people who have bottom dysphoria as it visually looks like they have a penis in their pants. I’ve had mine for six years, and i dont think the website i bought it off of even exists anymore tbh. You can get them on websites for trans goods, but also at sex toy shops. I got mine when i was thirteen, on advice of my gender doctor when i complained of bottom dysphoria. Specifically, i have a 4” Sport stp from number one laboratories. A stp is a varient of the packer idea that acts as a funnel so you can stand to pee. I don’t really use it as that anymore, though. There are also other varients, such as ones that allow to be used as a strap on as well and higher end ones usually referred to as prosthetics that are extremely lifelike to the point of passing as a cis penis (though these are usually very expensive due to being handmade) and ones that can work for peeing, packing, penetrative sex and mastrubation, tho those are usually also very expensive. Packing isnt by nature a sexual act, and people of all ages can pack. However, it can be a sexual thing for some people in some ways. Most people start packing with a pair of rolled up socks, and diy packer guides exist! And finally, a packing harness is just like a strap on harness but designed to be worn under clothes all day and to securely hold it in place, so theyre usually more comfy and shaped like boxers or jockstraps.

✌️ hope that was helpful

[theslowpath]

🍳🛒 - lovesmenot2015

thank you for the ask this took ages because i was absolutely barren of ideas for a few days but here we are 🙏🏻

prompts:

cooking

shopping

au: father tenth/son tyler

summary: ten picks his first grade son up from school and takes him grocery shopping, and even lets him help make dinner

warnings: although this au is a dark/comship involving an adult man's inappropriate relationship with his elementary school aged son, this fic has no warnings. just wholesome father/son content this time.

tyler pushed the heavy doors open by leaning on them with all his body weight and ran out into the cold december air. immediately he saw his father waiting for him, his face lit up and his arms opening up for a hug. he threw himself into his arms and gave the tightest squeeze he could.

ten squeezed his son right back and swayed him a little too. he gave him a kiss on the cheek, making a little smooch sound. "how was school today tyty?" he asked as he stood up and held tyler's hand. the two began walking to the school parking lot.

"it was good! my teacher gave us goodie bags for christmas break!" tyler answered excitedly. today was the last day of school before their two week vacation. he held up the little gift bag for ten to see.

"oh, how nice... you saved some christmas candy for me, i hope?" he asked.

tyler went quiet. "no... i forgot, im sorry" he said, sounding ashamed as he looked down at his shoes.

ten laughed. "thats okay! im just teasing. that candy is yours, you deserve it"

tyler looked up again. "daddy... can we have hot cocoa when we get home?" he asked. please say yes, he thought.

"of course! but we need to do some shopping first, okay?" ten said as he unlocked his car.

tyler climbed into the back seat and buckled himself in. "okay!" he reached into his goodie bag and pulled out a christmas tree shaped eraser, still in its clear plastic wrapper. he fidgeted the eraser around in his hands while looking out the window as his dad drove away from his school. "... can we listen to the radio?" tyler asked.

ten nodded. "mhm!" he clicked on the radio and turned it to a classic rock station, knowing it was tyler's favorite.

the ride to the grocery store went by much faster with songs that tyler knew playing. he even sang along to a few of them, knowing some of the words. sometimes ten would laugh at tyler singing along.

"whats so funny?"

"oh its nothing" his dad said. "its just that this song isnt really for kids"

"oh" tyler said. he figured it was one of those things he would 'understand when he got older,' that his dad refused to explain.

the car finally came to a complete stop and ten took the keys out, turning the car off. "alright! groceries, here we come! allons-y"

tyler giggled at his dad's catchphrase and hopped out of the car. ten made sure to hold his son's hand and keep him as close as possible, since the store seemed pretty crowded today. his father's large hand firmly holding his smaller one felt warm and gave tyler a feeling of safety as they entered the building of loud noise and bright lights. he edged himself a little closer to ten, now hugging his arm.

ten pet tyler's head softly with his free hand and pulled him along gently. "come, now. lets get something for dinner tonight" he said. his voice was soft and kind.

"sketty..." tyler mumbled, then wondered if his dad even heard.

"hm? you want spaghetti?" ten asked.

tyler nodded, rubbing his face against ten's sleeve.

"lets get some noodles then..." he said. after a short walk to the pasta isle, ten grabbed a couple boxes of spaghetti noodles and tossed them into his shopping basket.

tyler perked up. "hey, we need sauce too!" he said as it occurred to him.

ten nodded and continued guiding his son around the various isles. "yep, yep, im getting to that"

they eventually retrieved a few cans of marinara sause and some mozzarella cheese.

"there we go! now we're all set" ten said. he brought tyler along as he paid for their food and left, all the while still holding tyler close and keeping him feeling warm and safe.

the car ride home was short. they kept the radio on, but turned the volume down a little to talk over it. tyler told his father some jokes he heard from other kids that day, conveniently forgetting the more rude and inappropriate ones.

their arrival home after a long day of school, and work for ten, felt like a warm blanket draped around their bodies. ten started the fireplace going as tyler sat on the couch. his big puffy coat and scarf were now hung on the hook by the door and he had wrapped himself up in a fuzzy blanket.

ten sighed as he stood up, having finally gotten the fire to stay going consistently. tyler got up and sat right in front of it to warm up faster. he held his hands out by the small window.

"careful! dont sit so close, okay tyty?" ten said, and pulled him back a couple feet. tyler whined, but didn't say anything. "... its okay, youll feel warmer when i give you your hot cocoa, remember?"

tyler perked up a little. thats right! he was getting hot cocoa.

ten disappeared into the kitchen and for a few minutes, tyler was alone. he looked up at the christmas tree and thought about how fun it was to help decorate it with his dad. the ornaments were sparkling in the light of the fire and the angel at the very top seemed to shine, with its bright white satin dress and feathered wings. tyler wiggled a little in excitement. he couldnt wait for his dad's friends to see it and tell him how good of a job he did helping to decorate.

soft footsteps entered the living room as ten approached tyler. he crouched down and sat next to his son on their shag carpet, holding a mug of steaming hot cocoa in each hand. he handed one to tyler carefully. "i put some milk in there so it should be cool enough to drink. just dont spill okay?" he said.

tyler took a sip. "mmmm!"

ten smiled. "good?"

he nodded.

the two sat and watched the fire in silence for a few peaceful minutes. tyler had his head resting on his father's shoulder and ten hummed softly, happy to spend time with his baby boy.

"okay... im gonna make dinner now" he finally said, breaking the silence.

tyler whined a little, not wanting ten to get up and leave their comfy position.

"oh, i know baby" ten said as he pet tyler. "how about you come help me make dinner? hm?"

tyler nodded and followed his dad to the kitchen. he watched as he started boiling a pot of water and put all the dry noodles in.

"stay away from the stove okay? this isnt the part i need help with yet" ten explained. "i dont want you to burn yourself"

"okay" tyler said. he watched ten take out a baking sheet and lay out some meatballs, then slide it into the oven.

"here, wanna play games while you wait?" ten asked. he took his phone out of his pocket and handed it to tyler.

tyler bounced excitedly and took the phone. "yeah!"

he focused hard on plants vs zombies, so much so that within just a few minutes he was completely sucked in. the room around him seemed to disappear as his focused stayed on the glowing screen and nothing else.

"okay... here we go" ten said. he took the steaming pot off the stove and held it over the sink, careful not to spill any boiling water on himself as he poured the contents into a strainer. a cloud of steam rose from the sink as the water went down the drain.

the noodles were soft now and looked much more appetizing than they did in the box, all stiff and dry. tyler licked his lips.

"its not ready yet! be patient" ten said through a chuckle. "this is the part i need help with, okay?"

tyler nodded, excited for whatever he was about to do. ten picked him up carefully and sat him on top of the counter. he was too little to help with dinner from where he stood on the floor, he could barely reach.

tyler watched ten pull the meatballs out of the oven. "im so tall! im flying!" he said.

"yes you are!" ten said. he poked tyler's nose gently with the tip of his finger. "boop! now... youre gonna take this biiggg spoon, and youre gonna stir stir stir! as good as you can! okay?" ten explained, and handed tyler a wooden spoon, then opened the cans of sauce and poured them into the pot of noodles.

tyler nodded. "yes!" he said, and immediately began mixing the noodles with the sauce. "it smells good... i want a bite now!" he said as he stirred the best he could.

"haha, me too! but we gotta wait until its all done, okay?" ten explained. "... here, try turning it over like this..." he took tyler's hand and showed him how to scoop the noodles from the bottom of the pot and turn them over so the sauce was mixed evenly. "this way theres no lonely noodles at the bottom"

tyler nodded and kept going. after a while, though, his arms got tired. he whined a little, feeling too tired to keep stirring but still wanting to continue. he was having fun.

"thats good! thank you so much, youre so helpful tyty!" ten said. he took the pot and kissed tyler on the forehead. "are we ready to dig in?"

tyler nodded excitedly. "yeah!"

ten chuckled. "okay, here we go..." he put some spaghetti in two bowls and put some meatballs in as well, and handed one to tyler. tyler couldnt stop himself from grinning widely, feeling very proud of himself for helping his daddy make dinner.

"mmm..." ten said after taking a bite. he waited until he had swallowed it to speak. "this is so good! ive never tasted spaghetti this good... what did you put in here?" he teased.

tyler giggled. "nothing daddy!"

"well, you did something. my meals are never this good when i make them myself..."

tyler giggled more and continued enjoying his dinner. he and his dad kept eating and talking until their bowls were empty and their hunger was satisfied. the two spent the rest of the evening playing video games together. well, really it was ten playing them. tyler only cuddled and watched. the games were much too hard for tyler and he would always get upset that he couldnt do it.

eventually he fell asleep in his father's arms, who turned off the console and carried him off to bed.

#self ship #my post #oc x canon #au: father tenth/son tyler #ask

[dykevanny]

OKAY WOO

so basically yeah vanessas plural. like she doesnt Know but she is. she just thinks shes super forgetful (amnesia from when her headmate fronts) and her days are pretty routine so shes not alarmed when she cant pick out what exactly she did and just thinks today was extra boring.

VANESSAS HEADMATE okay i dont have a name for them yet but theyre more naive than and younger than vanessa. definitely closer to gregorys age, maybe a little older? havent decided lol. and theyre a little bunny with brown markings (<-yeah they based the initial mask off their own appearance. arent they adorable im love them..) and theyre the one who glitchtrap latched onto since he could take advantage of that disconnect between the two, and he manipulated them (they were really lonely since they couldnt really have friends of their own and couldnt talk to vanessa. its kinda like a one-way mirror for them - they can see in and hear vanessa, but she cant see out of the front to where they are, and if shes not fronting, she just doesnt remember anything.)

glitchtrap cant front (he doesnt have anywhere near that level of control) so he uses the headmate and guides them and talks to/manipulates them. cause they can front just fine!

i havent decided if he lets them remember killing or keeps the memories from them, but glitchtraps removal DOES snap them out of the brainwashing/manipulation sorta, and they feel really lost afterwards, and if they didnt remember before, then glitchtrap left them with the memories as a kinda fuck you to them. either way, super traumatized after the fact.

theres also kinda two paths i take with them towards the end, one is far more “supernatural” (but still sort of believable with fnaf) and the other definitely sticks to the realm of normalcy lol. the normal-er one has the headmate stay in post-3 star, and it basically involves freddy and gregory trying to figure out just why vanessa acts odd some days and then never remembers it (the headmate isnt so great at pretending to be vanessa. superficially its fine, coworkers and strangers didnt question it, but gregory and freddy? nah. they catch on quick). things are uncertain for a while but ultimately theyre all okay!! everyone gets along!!

the more supernatural one is specifically for my au that i have, its cassie-centric, and in this one, instead of leaving behind the headmate, he basically drags them down with him and they get trapped in the ar world, ironically keeping it safely out of glitchtraps reach cause that mf got absolutely obliterated while they basically got set onto the ground gently with a blanket and pillow.

i do intend to draw them eventually so if ur interested i could tag u! /gen

anyways, this is SO messy lol. i hope it makes Any Sense At All i love plural vanessa

ohhhhhh i really like this concept,,,,, the headmate being around Greg’s age esp… glitchtrap loves to manipulate children huh. (Looks at ggy) i like them staying around w 3star…. That’s fun:) also them being the bunnay -> the design for the mask is a really fun touch

#Speaking of system ness. Remind me to talk about loch later

[nerosdayinanime]

I know I wasn't the person that originally asked about Giyuucore songs but that post caught my interest because you mentioned a lot of songs and some of my favorites👀

I'd really like to hear your thoughts on Gilded Lily! I've seen it taken in a couple different contexts online but idk anyone that listens to it. After Dark is another banger but I never considered thinking of it as Giyuucore. the same thing with Little Dark Age talk about blorbo, think about blorbo :)

also I listened to The Mute and The Missing Road for the tag you left on my one drabble and 😭 i see it so clearly with how so socially awkward little blorbo is

usually i think of my music taste as mainstream but not like. Popular mainstream yk? usually at least, since i started only really using spotify it kinda just Sticks with popular... (i just think the music i listen to its pretty all over the place) anyway-

Gilded Lily got me from the chorus haven't i given enough? giyuu gives his all yet still all the shit that happens to him and the people he loves... with him in mind the lyric reads as more a polite way of asking higher powers 'havent you taken enough from me?' yk?

always the fool with the slowest heart hes always behind his peers and misunderstood, negative feedback loop of hiding further in himself and straying further behind

but i know youll take me with you when he loves he gives a piece of himself, so when they're lost they take a piece of him with them i know ill take you with me the haori he so dearly cares for

we'll live in spaces between walls how ghosts are respected as existing in a third place, the border between life and death- how giyuu does something similar, as close as a ghost you can get without death- hes treats himself the same as the ghosts that haunt him

last lyric for gilded lily is manga spoliers and iirc youre an anime-only, so ill keep that one under wraps lmao

-------

After Dark is all dreams and broken memories, the echo-y voice and faraway sound of the piano all tinged with melancholy (probably shoulda put it with the sabigiyuu playlist lmao)

i see you, you see me - how pleasant, this feeling - the moment you hold me - i missed you, im sorry - ive given what I have - i showed you I'm growing - the ashes fall slowly - as your voice consoles me only alive in his dreams, the reprieve of being in sabito's arms hurts from its fleeting nature. his chance at trying to right his wrongs of being too weak, a demon's dying ashes as proof, sabito's voice (a faded memory of, distorted with unfamiliarity) telling him he doesnt need to prove himself of anything

as the hours pass - i will let you know - that i need to ask - before I'm alone - how it feels to rest - on your patient lips  - to eternal bliss - im so glad to know the false feeling of lips against his, only as good as a dream gets. (he knows it isnt real, it doesnt feel real, its heaven nonetheless) a kiss that never happened, never will happen, hes just happy to have known him at all (even if the memories are so painful)

we're swaying to drum beats - in motion, im feeling - my patience controlling - the question, i wont speak two hearts in sync as their sword swings, giyuu always holds his tounge until the perfect moment (a perfect moment doesnt exist)

we're telling the stories - our laughter, he knows me - we're leaving, we're talking - youre closer, it's calming reliving faded memories- happy times and the march to their shared grave. the impeding dread of Knowing simmers to an empty lull when their hands brush as they walk

the night will hold us close and the stars will guide us home - ive been waiting for this moment, we're finally alone - i turn to ask the question, so anxious, my thoughts a calm rest with another painful dream of a man that doesnt exist

your lips were soft like winter, in your passion, i was lost their lips meet, painfully cold and oh so dead against his, only for a moment. he opens his eyes to the crystal clear memory of the determined fire behind rounded eyes before he turned. white haori disappearing to the forest, vision blurred, red trailed down his face, what was he supposed to do now?

-------

Little Dark Age is super gloomy and sorta like. corrupted church vibes. idk how to explain that. the tone of voice singing keeping the note flat (except in the chorus) the background music echoing itself it just overall reminds me of devilman crybaby's corrupted demonic vibe. Smells Blood(kensuke ushio). dvmcb has a more Taken And Run By Evil/Satan kinda vibe whereas little dark age is more God Left Us

the lyrics are a narration, his own thoughts and feelings he never speaks aloud but says if you listen close enough.

the ruins of the day, painted with a scar dont need to explain that one

and, the more i straighten out, the less it wants to try the amount of willpower it takes him to just keep going

oh-oh, forgiving who you are, for what you stand to gain - just know that if you hide, it doesnt go away/i grieve in stereo, the stereo sounds strange - you know that if it hides, it doesn't go away self-narration, how much he still hurts despite hardening his heart against it all

when you get out of bed, dont end up stranded - horrified. with each stone. on the stage - my little dark age stranded in the stagelight, stone upon stone tied to him always weighing him down

specifically ties with the other lyric- come find us heading for the bridge, bring a stone, all the rage, my little dark age he thinks he deserves it, peoples hatred and anger at his failure, he ties the stones himself

if I get out of bed, you'll see me standing all alone, horrified, on the stage, my little dark age all of this song ties specifically to this one imagery i have of sabito and giyuu and hashira overall- theyre the ones that bare the light that destroys demons. with their strength they cast shadows for other slayers and innocent people to hide behind, still safely in the light but not being burned by it as they are.

Giyuu and Sabito were supposed to bare that light together, strengthened by eachother casting shadows where the other's weakest and baring the burn with eachother side by side, they were supposed to cast a shadow large enough to shield everyone they cared for, to not lose everyone they love again.

this line was the start of it all- waking up alone on the stage being wholly burned by the light with no respite. the blinding light instead signaling his little dark age

also yeah!!! the self-isolating, lonely theme of those songs is literally just Him. it speaks for itself so clearly i dont even know how i could explain it to someone who knows giyuu but doesnt understand how The Mute & The Missing Road relate to him. its just. Its Him man. you gotta believe me. if you only listen with your ears, i cant get in - and a heart always holds, onto missing roads MAN CMON ITS RIGHT THERE-

#tomioka giyuu #loserboy giyuu posting #fratboy sabito posting #i think giyuu in regards to sabito puts him on a pedestal. worships him as a god and says he'll never compare to. devoted to a fault. #also i dont like how much i Dont think of tsutako w these songs bc she was literally The Start of it. she was his everything and she gave #her all for his wellbeing and it just set him to believe he didnt fucking deserve it. his life shouldnt have costed *hers* in his #eyes and that shaped his attitude towards himself for the rest of his life #also just now realizing i have Slow Doown(crx) in giyuucore and Hurry Hurry(air traffic controller) in sabitocore #BRO ITS FUCKING- #dude #'ooh im gonna miss something - if i keep bumping - the most significant stuff #all my friends and all the loose ends - and this love of mine- cause im running out of time' #'who am i? am i still the same guy? or have i lost something as i keep stomping #mind and health - every bit of myself - i ignore the signs as im running out of time' #'a year goes by - you wonder why - not much is done - youve run too much - in parallel - now hurry hurry is your hell' #vs #'when i see you speeding by - all i do is wave goodbye - i wish i could buy some time - enough to get it right #oh slow down - slow down - slow down - oh slow down - slow down - slow down' #the juxtaposition #sabito needing to do as much as he possibly can with the people he cares about to feel like they did enough together #giyuu needing the people he cares about to slow down and just savor & bask in the time they have together #both of them feeling like the time they share with others are limited- yet going about it in completely different ways #both wanting to be able to do something about it- but sabito pushing himself to do it all to the point it kills him while giyuu #pushes himself but never truly believes it'll amount to anything worthwhile #-------nsfw further tags------- #also find it exceedingly amusing that it fits my giyuu overstim kink & sabito denial kink hc<3 #sabito's great at keeping it going while giyuu knows how to drag it out~ theyr perfect 4 eachother<3<3 #man im *really* bad at not making everything about sabigiyuu lmao

[queensharotto]

Honeymoon Vol. 12 Translation

Listen to the audio here!

Yuu Kiritani (桐谷侑, Kiritani Yuu)

Voiced by: Morikubo Shoutarou

Age: Late 20s

Job: Hairdresser

Country: Hawaii

For the translation, view below. Note that it isn’t 100% accurate.

🌺 Track 1: Prologue

All right! You can open your eyes now.

Look, you can go with bangs like this.

I'm glad I took the plunge and put scissors in it, because you have a beautiful face, so I need to look at it properly.

You don't believe that reaction anymore, do you? I'm serious. Anyway, I'm glad you liked it.

That's right, the next time will be two months later, and it's not good if it's more than that.

In fact, I now have my own shop. Thank you very much!

I studied under my seniors and really learned a lot of things. That's how I met you.

Well, if you don't mind, would you like to visit the new store? I want to go to your house from here and now you can try the head spa as much as you want

No pushing? Let's extend the massage how about this?

Are you desperate for that?

I want you to be the 15th customer, I want you to come, not because you're a customer.

I like you

Nobody touches your hair but me.

Is it not good?

Really? Is it good?

Hooray! I wonder if I can keep this smooth and shiny hair to myself from now on.

What's wrong?

On, sorry, I'm happy

*laughs* It's a shame, though. Any more than this will make my seniors angry.

Then, at 5 o’clock, I'll send you a guide to the new shop.

Please call me. It's a promise.

Yes and, I forgot to say something important.

I will be the only one there for the time being

Is it okay if it's just the two of us?

I will spend plenty of time to making you even more beautiful.

I'm looking forward to it.

🌺 Track 2: Travel Plans

I'm really crazy about it

By the way, it's time to make a toast

Dont panic

I went to great lengths to dress up, so don't spill it.

No, I'm not treating you like a child

I simply wish to treat of you

You're already embarrassed and cute

Hold the glass properly

Well then, a cheers to your eyes.

Uh-huh? What's with that reaction?

Didn't you like the words of the toast?

Don't you know Casablanca? A love romance released in 1942 won three Academy Awards?

All right, let me look cool for tonight.

Hey, remember?

It's almost a year, isnt it?

Oh yes, thanks to you, we were able to celebrate the first anniversary of the store's opening, and that's right, but it's not like that.

It's been a year since you and I started dating

Thank you for taking me at that time.

I've been able to do this until today because you were by my side.

From now on... no um...

Another year

Stay with me

Thank you

Nice to meet you.

I wonder if this is okay.

I really want to kiss you right now, but you'll be angry, right?

Because you smile so cutely

From here, I have no choice but to go to a place where I flirt freely.

Overseas for about a week next month?

It's okay, I've already spoken to my clients.

Surprised? Actually, I've been planning it for a long time.

I had to keep this kind of thing a secret.

It's decided not because I wanted to see your surprised face.

It's a celebration of the second anniversary of the store's opening, and everyone is happy to send it out.

I thought I'd take your word for it.

If you can't take a vacation without this kind of opportunity, it may be the first and last time.

I don't know, will you come with me?

I thought you would say that.

Let's make it a wonderful trip that you will never forget.

🌺 Track 3: Day 1: Tour by Rental Car

By the way, I sent my luggage to the hotel and became lighter, let's go!

We can go now

Ah, nice breezes, the blue sky, left-hand drive, right-hand traffic. It's like going to Hawaii

It's okay, I've ridden left-hand drive before in Japan, so it's not that difficult, and the accelerator and brake are arranged together.

Hey? Are you so worried about my driving? Always in the passenger seat.

Oh, I haven't been riding much, and I don't have a lot of time off.

I wanted to make up for this trip, or rather, I wanted to make time for just the two of us.

I want to face you, not because l'm busy.

We've been dating for a year now.

I'm glad you feel the same way.

Hey, aren’t smoothies delicious?

Lucky! Stuck at a traffic light!

Hey, can I have a bite?

Ahhh, I mean, I can't take my hands off the steering wheel, so buy it and point it at me.

Look, the traffic light will change.

It's true, it looks good for your health.

There's the signal, but I wanted to drink, a little more.

My cute and adorable lover is always naive, I'm embarrassed.

Huh? I just told you the truth.

I'm going to take you to a good place, so cheer yourself up.

So, where do you think it is? Stay tuned for it when we arrive!

Welcome to Ala Moana Center, Hawaii's largest integrated shopping center with more than 290 shops and restaurants.

Amazing right? I can never go around at 12 o'clock, or if I'm not good at it, I'm going to get lost.

So we'll need a map!

Where do you want to go? I have a lot of things I want to do with you, like your clothes.

So, do you want to go?

The one piece dress and you are cute, so I think it suits your skin better than that color.

Ignition is absolute. No, it suits you, it suits you. But the rush back when.

It's so beautiful, white and neat, like a wedding dress.

Oh, it’s nothing!

Are you fine with it?

Mahalo!

It's the same as thank you.

Well, just a simple greeting, right? Don't you tell me to go and follow vou? That's why.

Please leave your luggage to me and be ladies first.

It's okay, it's okay.

Is that bra uncomfortable? Then why don't you just say so?

I won't let you do anything to your bra, nor will I let it run away of course.

In my arms.

It's fine to hold hands like usual, but I don't think it's good to cross my arms like this. Because you can be so close.

So, where are we going next? I'm going to carry our luggage with me today.

🌺 Track 4: Day 2: The Polynesian Show

Thank you for the meal!

It was delicious, wasn't it? I want to eat papaya salad and macadamia nut chicken at home.

Huh? You'll make it? Hooray! I'm looking forward to it!

Huh, yeah. After this, it's a long-awaited backstage tour.

It's amazing to be able to see it from the practice scene before the show! I'm looking forward to it.

That will raise the tension. It's one of the things I definitely wanted to see when I came to Hawaii.

The Polynesian show we're about to see is the largest in Hawaii. A cast with more than 100 years of history will perform songs and dances while actually using water and energy.

As the cinema guide said, Polynesian dance was originally a traditional dance for the transmission of mythology and culture.

Polynesian refers to the islands in the triangle that connects Hawaii, New Zealand, and Easter Island, and this time, you can experience the culture of the three islands from there through dance.

The tension will come!

And I can't help it, too.

Hair, makeup, and costumes, etc.

I may have an occupational disease, but it's a hobby.

I'm glad you're an understanding lover, although it's too much and I'm a little worried.

Heh, nothing.

Amazing! It was amazing, I'm looking forward to the performance!

Even people who want to go will try to serve customers and challenge themselves.

Yes!

Err, um.

Am I the only candidate?

Hey, you couldn't knit either because you're too shy.

Okay, you watch here.

Then let's go, can you fix this?

How are you? Huh?

Not here..

I was relaxed because it wasn't Japan.

As soon as I took my eyes off of it, another bastard approached.

*clears throat*

My brother is Japanese, no, what a coincidence! We are!

By the way, no matter how cute and troubled her face is, she's my companion!

See you again

See you soon.

I don't regret it. You're going to stand silent and keep that at bay, so you have to defend yourself.

What am I

Maybe, on the stage just now, it's true that I was close to the girls, but that's because I was learning choreography.

I know, but no.

I really want you

Cute!

I'm glad you baked Yakimochi.

Thank you

*buzzer rings*

Is it time?

Let's go back to the hotel and make up.

🌺 Track 5: Day 3: At the Hotel Pool Bar

Then the third time? Seventh time? *chuckles* I'm amazing!

Previous? Uh cheers!

Nice!

It hurts during this time, the alcohol is strong.

A rum-based cocktail. Information about tropical cocktails is what they call it.

It was originally invented by the owner of a restaurant in San Francisco, but a friend from Tahiti who drank it said it was always the best, so that's how it got it's name.

It's really great!

Hmm, you seems to be in a good mood too.

It was extra good

After coming to Hawaii, I really thought, but isn't it nice to relax like this once in a while?

Hanging around the market without a particular purpose or driving on

a wide road.

Well, I've been driving almost all the time since we came to Hawaii, so I wasn't drinking as much.

Just because you've been working doesn't make you suddenly vulnerable to alcohol.

I think it's just that I'm enjoying my trip with you, l'm happy, and I'm drinking a little too much.

I'm borrowing your shoulder.

Are you nervous?

Why? I'm always doing more amazing things.

Hey hey, where are you going?

I won't let you go.

If you're so embarrassed, hug me like this and hide it.

Huh, is this too bad?

This kind of thing might make me a little happy, but I don't know what to say.

Because you rarely say selfishness.

I've been embarrassed the other day.

Anyway, I'm worried every day.

365 days of the year, like learning one stupid thing

I said I was free at night, but suddenly I got a job.

If a sudden magazine job comes my way on vacation, I will jump at it.

Sometimes you're kind to me, and sometimes you're so rude.

I'm worried.

Hey? What do you like about me?

I don't know everything.

Tell me more properly.

Hm, Hm

I see

So, what about kiss with me?

You like it?

Look? Hey!

You know we're not children anymore

Well said

I have to reward you.

*kiss*

I like you too

Very

*kiss*

Very

🌺 Track 6: Day 4: Hawaiian Pancakes

It was the right choice for terrace seating, the wind feels good because the sea is close!

Hm? I made a little phone call yesterday.

It's popular with the locals, so it's okay.

You're welcome! I brought it up, so let's leave it at this.

People who come to the shop at 1 o’clock, I wonder if they arranged it! They said that people eat pancakes with their boyfriends and girlfriends, but I didn't get along well with you on holidays, so I was accumulating damage.

But it's a shift in thinking. So we swore to ourselves that we would eat it in the real place.

Well, I’ve been eating a lot since I came to Hawaii, even though I don't usually eat much.

Why? I guess it's because of this cheerful climate and open atmosphere.

Oh! Come, come!

Mahalo!

The macadamia nut sauce is yours while mine is a fruit-filled bowl

Well then, thank you for the meal!

After all, this can be done as many times as you want!

It's you.

When you eat delicious food, you look happy.

I love looking at you so much.

Ah, the opposite of face covering.

I was enjoying it a lot.

Yes, let's do this!

It's delicious with heaps of fruit.

Delicious?

Nice smile!

Now it's my turn

Huh? Because you didn't like being looked at one-sidedly, right?

If that's the case, then it's okay if we like each other.

Why not?

This is Hawaii, a southern island. Nobody knows anything about us.

Calm down, calm down.

Even if you see it, it's a happy thing, and you'll just be watched over with a smile.

Yeah, I mean lovers.

Why not?

Just one bite is enough.

*chuckles* Thank You!

Ah~

*mouth full* Yeah, it's delicious!

Understood!

I see! Is that so?

It's not that my appetite has increased since I came to Hawaii, but it's because I've had more opportunities to sit around the dining table with you, and I've come to eat a lot.

People often say that casual times in movies are the happiest right?

Until now, I had heard that it was like that.

Yeah, I may have realized something!

When we go back to Japan, I'll think about how to work a little more, okay?

With you, even once a day. I want to sit around the table like this every day.

And well.. No, it's nothing!

Welcome back to pancakes!

That's right!

Let's eat a lot and play a lot today!

🌺 Track 7: Night 4: Lomi Lomi

Yes! How about a special iced tea soda after taking a bath?

Please enjoy.

Anyway, it was pretty fast, wasn't it? Did you soak in the bathtub properly?

What? Just a shower?

No, no, because on the contrary, I can't get tired.

Somehow, make it a little darker.

I don't mind.

We played a lot in the sea during the day, but you have to loosen up your body properly.

Look, your legs are swollen. If you relieve don't the swelling, it will turn into fat.

You don't like it, right?

It's nice to be honest!

Well, I'lI get ready for tomorrow, so wait for me. I'm sure it was accompanied by blowing this place, right?

It's okay, don't worry about it. Because I just want to.

I'll hold back forever, but don't really care. I'm thinking of incorporating massage into the shop in earnest next time, and I've been participating in the course for a while.

So you,

Ping Pong!

Lie lie! It doesn't sound like a test bench.

You finally laughed

I'll be right back, so be a good girl and wait.

After warming your feet and lightly relaxing them, it's time for a Lomi Lomi massage.

Yeah, It is a traditional Hawaiian massage that stimulates rhythmically using the arms and under the elbows.

Even in Japan, there are quite a few shops and often perform treatments with hot stones made of bedrock stone.

By the way, "Lomi Lomi" means "massage" in Hawaiian.

Well, that's not all. It also means affection transmitted from the palm of your hand.

Do you feel my love for you?

Really?

It's about time, how about some souvenirs? Yeah, I'm going to wipe it with a towel and put it on my lap.

Speaking of Hawaiian, do you know 'ohana"?

Oh yeah, I heard it a lot in the Mouse Country animated movie.

Remember what it means?

Oh, move your left foot back.

Family. What does family mean?

So what do you mean by that?

You and I could be Ohana too.

I hope we can be a wonderful family.

What?

I heard you!

Huh?! You feel asleep?

She's making a face that looks good.

*light kiss*

This time, I'm not going to surprise you, I'll tell you when you're awake.

*another light kiss*

Good night, sweet dreams.

🌺 Track 8: Day 5: Kailua Beach

Well then, I'll just finish the checkout first.

Today's destination is Kailua Beach! It's so beautiful that it was once voted the best beach in the United States.

Away from the hustle and bustle of stamens, you can step on the pure white sand and look at the emerald green sea. Yeah! Nice Nice! It seems that there are sea turtles and handles, so let's ask the guide.

Huh? Are you going to change?

You look good in the white one piece.

So, let's meet the sea turtles again?

If you're just taking a leisurely stroll around, the one piece dress is fine.

No, it doesn't have a deep meaning.

It's just my romance, or we both chose it together, and it looks really good.

No good?

Thank you!

See you later.

Amazing!

The sun sets over the sea.

To have any scenery to ourselves, it's a great luxury.

Actually, I asked the guide about the secret places during the day.

By all means, just the two of us.

Because there was something I wanted you to ask.

For coming to Hawaii with me, I thank you for that.

Let me say it again.

I'm always at work, I can't see you, I can't take care of you, but I can't let you go.

I felt like I was tying you up with the word lover.

But after spending time with you on this trip, I realized.

I was just thinking about it myself.

You always respond to my feelings straight.

I'm worried, I want to talk about it like this.

Ah, of course!

I'm going to make more time for the two of us.

Please ~

Please be my wife.

Th- thank goodness!

I was going to propose on this trip, but I managed to find the right timing.

When the time came, I lost confidence.

But your smile gives me confidence.

Thank You!

*kiss*

Thank you for your continued support.

*more kisses*

🌺 Track 9: The Sixth Night

As expected, it is a prestigious hotel, and the view from the balcony is also great.

I want to see your happy face.

And you know...

It's our last night in Hawaii.

What do you say?

You know, I wanted to look cool.

I'm not coming to the airport tomorrow, there's something that I want to do.

A wedding for just the two of us in Hawaii. Will you give it to me?

What a surprise success!

Of course, the official funding will only be given after returning to Japan.

I don't know if it's because it's a big deal, but it will also be a memory of the trip.

In addition,

*kissing*

It's true that I want everyone to bless our marriage.

After all, you say that there is also a feeling that I want to monopolize your sunny appearance.

Ah, don't be stunned.

At this point, I'll tell you, l've been envious dozens of times during this trip.

If only I didn't lie about this.

Even when I went to see a Polynesian show, while I was away for a bit.

I'm a really happy person.

*sob*

I'm not crying.

I just got drunk.

Oops!

I haven't drank a drop today.

Don't laugh too.

It's cute and irresistible..

*kissing* I see

You don't have to change anymore.

Because we're going to be a husband and wife.

*kissing*

I can stand it already.

That's right.

Let's go to our room.

Put your arms around me and use it.

It's okay, leave everything to me and I'll just do what feels good.

Call my name like you always do.

Hey?

I love you.

*kiss*

Let me love you with all of me.

🌺 Track 10: Wedding After Returning Home

So, don't just move.

I think the lipstick was darker than I expected.

*kiss*

Good!

Is this all right?

Okay, okay.

Leave it to me, the charismatic hairdresser.

At your wedding in Hawaii, I made you exceptionally beautiful.

I'm officially showing off your bride look to everyone today, I'm so excited.

It's my job to clean you up. Right?

Very beautiful

For choosing me, I thank you.

Happy together

Really

That's true

Sorry, even before the ceremony.

Look up.

Even when I'm happy I cry

The ring fits on this finger.

Hand in hand

The two of us lived together, always laughing by my side. I love you, my beautiful person.

🌺 Track 11: Epilogue

Ha! Oh... I don't know...

I feel like I've cried for the rest of my life.

Huh?

Today's favorite is almost almost done.

What? Is that the image of me crying?

I think it's easy to get emotional.

But yeah!

Yes that's true!

We still have a lot of happy things waiting for us. It may not happen that the tears will dry up and not come out.

In the morning at your new home, when you answer the phone and say, "Yes, I want to hang up."

As much as I cry, you look red and busy.

*kiss*

Speaking of which, I received a congratulatory email from a church in Hawall.

"Please come again!"

Yeah, we'll definitely go there again.

This time with 3 people.

You and I, then

*kiss*

If it's our child, it's absolutely cute, right?

*laughs*

*kisses*

We’ll always be together.

love you

*kiss*

#honeymoon drama cd #yuu kiritani #honeymoon series #drama cd #morikubo shoutarou #my translations

[rachelkolar]

I am a total newb explaining Mastodon to my fellow newbs

I FINALLY got into Mastodon after six weeks of trying, and so far I like it. It’s definitely not for everyone--there’s a lot of scrounging around and curating your feed, which is WORK--but since one of the things I liked best about Twitter was how well I’d managed to curate my feed to avoid the hellsite experience, it’s fun for me. If it’s not fun for you, yeah, it’s going to be a drag.

A lot of the stuff about how to make Mastodon work for you is being written by people who have already been there for ages and don’t realize how overwhelming it is for the rest of us, so I wanted to give a total newbie’s-eye view for fellow newbies who are thinking about taking the plunge but don’t know how. Mastodon veterans, please feel free to chime in if I’m getting stuff totally wrong.

One thing that’s a pleasant surprise for me: I thought that the “instances” (servers, essentially) were completely separate like they are in Discord. They’re not; some of them are private, but from I’ve seen, it basically just affects what’s trending on your timeline. I’m on mindly.social (whose guiding ethos is basically “what if people on social media were nice?”), so when I click the various search tabs, I get the hashtags, news articles, etc. that are trending on mindly.social as well as among my friends. I can also pull up either a feed that’s just people on mindly.social or a feed that’s just people I’m following. I do wish I were in an instance like writing.exchange that were more geared toward my specific interests, but a lot of those are full right now.

1. Go to a site like Debirdify (https://debirdify.pruvisto.org/) to see if any of your mutuals are already on Mastodon. I wish I’d done this before signing up, because a great thing with Debirdify is that it tells you which instance most of your friends are on. I think most of them are full anyway, but if any of yours aren’t, it would be nice to have my friends’ interests having more weight on my news and hashtags or having them show up on my community feed as well as my homepage.

2. Pick an instance when you register. Once again, while it’s nice to get one where all your friends are so you get a water cooler right off the bat, this isn’t a huge deal. You can follow whoever you want and change your instance later. If you have no clue where to start, try googling “Mastodon instance for [insert an interest of yours here].”

3. Hunt down all those folks you found on Debirdify! Start getting friends!

4. Search for hashtags that interest you. There’s a guide here for how to follow hashtags on your main page as well as people: https://screenrant.com/follow-hashtags-mastodon-how-isnt-working-why/  Or you can find people posting with those hashtags who look interesting and follow them.

5. Here’s something that I just serendipitously stumbled on: post about something you really love, hashtag it a bunch, and see who likes or boosts (retweets) it. I just read Piranesi and am geeking out about it. A couple people who follow the Bookstodon and fantasybooks hashtags found my posts and liked or boosted them. If they like Piranesi, there’s a decent chance that they’re cool, so I went back to their profiles to see if I wanted to follow them.

It’s not a replacement for Twitter yet, but I’m pleasantly surprised by how much I’m enjoying it, and I feel like it WOULD be a replacement for Twitter if my favorite people came over. It’s work, but it’s a scavenger hunt kind of work that I enjoy. If the idea of digging around for cool people sounds fun to you, come check it out! And you can find me there at [email protected] . . . until I change instances, anyway.

UPDATE: Some extra tips from Fediverse veteran [email protected]! TL;DR you can get a jump on step 5 by introducing yourself with a bunch of hashtags ("I'm Rachel, and I play Ravenloft, write picture books, and read fantasy and horror! [String of relevant hashtags]"), and there are ways to follow instances other than your own so you have access to multiple water coolers.

UPDATE TWO: Welp, switched instances. Now I’m on [email protected].

#mastodon #twitter migration #twitter exodus #quit twitter #fediverse

[gogoakechi]

finally finished farhenheit 451 for class and i liked it a lot. i will state a disclaimer that my review is gonna be skewed since i was reading and analyzing it on a suffocating timer of less than a week on top of my other classwork and Work work. i know i wouldve enjoyed it a lot more if i wasnt going through it with the constant thought of "oh my god im running out of time"

anyway i REALLY liked bradburys use of symbolism and metaphor and description of common things as abstract concepts. also just how he sets the tone and speed of individual scenes. honestly by his writing alone every other adaptation is straight up inferior simply because it doesnt have it. youre absolutely not going to get the same feeling watching a movie adaptation as you would reading the book because you cant referred to a tv as a wall of families when you look at it and its just. a tv

most importantly though i found the message to be very realistic and honest and not at all the "books are the True Light everything Sucks without books just because theyre Books" kind of superiority complex i half expected. in fact, its ironic that i went in with that assumption since there are multiple points in the story that drive in that technology isnt all brainwashing and books arent inherently going to make you wiser. one of the characters at the end states that even when they had books they werent truly doing anything with them. the message seemed to moreso be about like. genuinely taking in the world around you and all the knowledge and memories it contains instead of just constantly feeding yourself instant gratification via tv and radio shows (examples today being social media and doomscrolling and only watching videos under fifteen minutes). were for real conditioning our minds to only want to take in surface level ten second information and we like to call it the consequences of adhd or depression or whatever but i really think its becoming a universal issue in this age. like even when i was doing my study guides for the book i was mindlessly opening and closing discord and tumblr and grasping absolutely nothing from them but images i wont remember the second i get back to my study guide. anyway ill cease that rant i need to get to bed

bradbury also does a really good job of utilizing his characters for the narrative. they all have their purpose and analyzing it i felt like this man stayed up all night every night trying to draw lines between factors in his own story. it all feels so real and meaningful. the scene where montags floating down the river feels especially profound against the chaos of the rest of the book

also. i love you captain beatty he was expertly used in the narrative. nobody fucking gets you like i do

i dont really have any complaints honestly. it wasnt like an Amazing book but it was genuinely really good and i can see why its been called a classic. you can really feel the depth of its thought and meaning and how much heart bradbury put into it. great book

#also ive concluded that the mechanical hound is just some fucked up dystopian version of a dalmation #like i said before bradbury liked to use abstract metaphors for simple things #so i was waiting for more clues to figure out what it was supposed to represent #but now i really think that was the only one that was literal #personal

[avo-kat]

been playing pokemon scarlet the whole weekend

havent had that much fun with a pokemon game in a long time, im really happy

but there are SO many things that make me very puzzled as to how and why somebody thought they are a good idea

rambly thoughts under the cut

like, ok, im actually not really into open world games, i liked pokemon sword fine, and i do think they did a decent job with it, but

we went from linear routes and bigger areas where you can clearly see where you are to

huge age areas where you can lost and where you cant see trainers until you are a few feet from then

and basically no instruction on how to get from one point to the next?

yea, there are roads, but since the game wants you to constantly double back to the academy, it seems like you are supposed to deduce the next route by yourself, but

the game doesnt actually tell you in what order to do gyms/titems/team star bosses? i assume the nurse at the pokemon center tells you, i never asked her because im using a guide, but

its SO weird?

like, just the vibe?

im finishing up a gym, defeated the leader, got my boss, i am booted out of the gym battle and

----

nothing. absolutely nothing. i feel puzzled, honestly. nothing.

story beats come when you enter an area, and it doesnt matter if you are in the right spot for your level. if you walk by a team star base, you get a story beat. if you walk into a gym, you get one too.

but not after! not even a single piece of advice, not a single hook coming from the main story?

yes, we are "supposed" to "choose" how we want to do the treasure hunt... but this is a pokemon game, we are actually supposed to do everything. i dont understand?

and you cant even realistically skip anything, as far as i can see.

titans give you the equivalent of HMs, gyms are necessary for pokemon obedience and later to enter the E4, defeating the team is necessary storywise.

so whats the idea? im confused.

so, huge sprawling areas where you get lost, no clear indication where to go next and how to get there (the minimap is useless, the big map is functionally useless too). you can use wild pokemon as clues (ok so these ones here are level 50, im way wrong), trainers probably too, but not really, because

you cant SEE the fucking trainers until you are super close to them.

yesterday i wanted to go to the next gym, picked a path that seemed like it was the right one, there was a trainer, fought them. they had level 30 pokemon, while my team was level 40. ok, something wrong? but its the right path, isnt it? i double check, shrug, put some lower level pokemon on my team so my main isnt overlevelled. go to the next trainer, up ahead the same road, a few steps farther ahead.

their pokemon were level 39. i almost lost because i just changed my pokemon. im confused. it is the right path, but... why? how would i know, when coming here before, that i was supposed to battle the first trainer, but not the second? again, they are on the same road, not far apart from each other.

there is a third trainer on the road. i battle them. their pokemon are level 36. i dont understand.

and cities:

they are pointless. obsolete. moot. talking to npcs is mostly a pointless endeavour now. you can only talk to some (they have an arrow symbol in their speech bubble), but nobody so far has actually giving me anything or provided like any interesting lore.

there are no buildings you can enter except the sandwhich shop. all other shops are direct menus with a plain background. the worst? there are like a dozen different shops. the main academy city has several of the SAME restaurants right next to each other.

there are different types of fashion stores so you gotta run around the towns to find them all. (the water city with the weird elevators is the worst). i dont understand? its all pointless.

the cities feel like... not set dressing, but honestly just irrelevent. in sword they felt like set dressing, but at least they were pretty. here, not so much. the only atmospheric city is the snow one ive seen so far. the others are "ok". but empty. and liveless.

so the main gameplay is running circles in the wild, which IS fun, absolutely!, trying to find trainers, running into trainers with pokemon 10 levels below your own a lot of the time, catching pokemon, picking up items.

okay. okay. okay.

like, again, im having SO MUCH FUN, but im also very confused. it does feel adventurey. i went into the ocean and a lake and seeing pokemon swimming around? thats amazing. running through the high grass, seeing pokemon around? thats fun. jumping off a high cliff and soaring through the air? thats so fucking cool. crawling up and down a snow mountain during a blizzard? its just fun, for some reason. im having fun. i feel like im actually discovering things, like im having a legit adventure, its what i wanted when i was a lil kid playing pokemon red. im travelling around the world, discovering things, visiting all these different areas, meeting all these different pokemon, climbing and jumping and swimming. its amazing.

but i also dont get it. lol.

what i wish:

bring back npcs saying anything worthwhile

bring back "mini" quests in the cities

buildings you can enter, esp housing

map features: toggle for "route" to next goal with level information, toggle feature for trainer not battled, darkened sections where you havent been yet?, lil window next to big map to show next possible goals/next steps in the "quests"

clothes that arent orange shorts with stripes. this is fucking horrible. i hate this so much. i love scarlet but wow those shorts make me secondguess my decision the whole damn day. what the fuck man. at least give me color options if you mandate school uniforms. and actually, why is penny in class without a school uniform? i call bullshit. fucking hell

pokemon Let's Go! feature that works, maybe? whats the point of adventuring thru an open world with a mount if your pokemon cant keep up and constantly goes back into your pokeball? what kind of player will be organically able to evolve pawmi? huh? where is that player? whats their name? tell me gamefreak

dont make me drag all ingredients one by one on the sandwich, thats bull

well thats all i can think of top of my head.

[x-chubby-reader]

hello! i really-really like your writings – who doesn't, they're wonderful, thank you very much for your works!

i was wondering if you could write part 2 for your hcs about bakugou, sero and kirishima hit by a quirk whish turned him into toddlers, this time with shoto and deku? 👉👈

please and thank you! ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

A/n - Hello hello, I am so sorry that I haven't been updating! With school I've been feeling extra burnt out. I even told myself that I would get done with many of the requests over the summer but that obviously did not happen...

Lowercase intentional

Most likely cursing

Not prof read

Toddler!Izuku and Shoto x Plus size reader

Shoto

is, unsuprisingly, well behaved and calm

100% the type to have calling ones older than him sir/ma'm

its just ingrained in his head and he can't even help it

would be the polar opposite of bakugo

may or may not freak you out with how well behaved and quiet he is

literally its almost like the girl from the ring just staring at you half the time

shoto almost always lingers in your peripheral vision and it is udderly terrifying when you notice

you'd have to get him to get use to you to break the whole scary, quiet, staring, toddler act

he will not quiet himself down

its pitiful in a way

almost like your the first person who will sit and listen to what he has to say

shotos little mind is completely filled with facts

and by facts, I mean animal facts

hes one of those ocean kids

shoto would go on and on about what resides in the 'big blue world', you got an idea

why not bring the ocean obsessed child to an aquarium

well it may have been a slightly bad idea...

he is the child who will challenge the staff as if a four year old knows more than an adult who dedicated their lives to the study of marine biology

"i know more about orca's than you do..."

saying shit like that, deadpan staring into their scared eyes

little shit

trying to give the workers some sort of break, you'd guide him to the gift shop

and guess what he had gravitated towards

those stupid little sharp puppet sticks

the ones that you always begged your parents for, but never got as it was overpriced

standing for a moment, you grabbed it

taking it almost hostage to the register, telling the 4 year old to wait a moment, as it was only a few feet away and you doubted that he wouldn't be able to be left alone.

while your back had been turned, the once toddler had now come back to his normal age, looking around slightly confused

you sure had a little shock, shark in hand, when you turned around

not knowing what to really say next, you just handed the boy the shark on a stick

grasping it, shoto had an almost undetectable grin

"so do you want to still look around?..."

Izuku

another very polite kid

not because of him being taught necessarily, but because of how timid he is

sure he is bubbly when he is with his mom, but without that safety blanket he is a whole other being

izuku is that kid to bolt and automatically find his place behind you to peek at something or someone 'scary'

as if your his comfort and security

completely refuses to wear pants

the kid will go on and on, listing the reasons why he hates them

you know he has to be as mobile as he can to be a successful hero, don't ask me why

will only strut around in shorts and long ass tube socks since he gets cold from the lack of length

there is one thing that does technically count as pants that he will wear without an argument

and that one thing is his all might onesie

when he wears that fleece one piece, he suddenly gains an feigned confidence

lowkey acts like a little all might

you can not tell him he isnt either or his whole confidence act will deflate

definitely has you playing hero and civilian with him for hours on end

face plants at least once because of how it is a little big on him and the extra fabric sometimes folds over at the feet, tripping him up

izuku had been running happily before tripping once again like the clumsy child he is, face planting behind the couch like clockwork

rushing over quickly, he had been laying on his side, back to his teenage size rubbing his head as if it would somehow stop the bruising

Oh yeah you were going to tease him for years with all the photos you had gotten.

#mha x reader #deku x reader #shoto x chubby reader #shoto x plus size reader #shoto x reader #chubby reader insert #anime x chubby reader #x plus size reader #mha x chubby reader #mha x plus size reader #mha x you #todoroki x plus size reader #todoroki x chubby reader #todoroki x reader #deku x chubby reader #deku x plus size reader #izuku x plus size reader #izuku x chubby reader #izuku x reader #reader insert #fluff #mha headcannon #mha headcannons

[snickerdoodlles]

📚 for the fic ask

Pat and Wai and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad realization that You're Friends With That Asshole

listen i'm a sucker for messy unwanted friendships and these two are very, very funny together, i cant help myself

so, the fic opens to the fact that Pat and Wai each see each other as Pran's free bastard man. do they hate each others' guts? absolutely. does Pran look Disappointed any time they're close to fighting? unfortunately. so they resolve to Tolerate each other's existence for the foreseeable future, and they tolerate each other so well they become actual friends (they refuse to acknowledge it though. they will do many things for Pran, including hiding a body, but admitting That Guy isn't toooootally the worst person out there? inconceivable)

it starts with a truce during their second year finals, shortly after Pat and Pran ""break up"". Pran gets vvvv stressed as projects come due, and it's the only times of the year Wai never flakes on him after The Incident Of Junior Year (high school). Wai's been Pran's rock through tough times like exams for ages (he doesn't get into the same anxiety spirals Pran does and will cheerfully use his bad grades to beat back any of Pran's intrusive thoughts). Pat's just Pran's safe space and really good at helping Pran loosen up or rethink whatever's overwhelming him at the time. and as Pran trumps whatever they feel about the other, Pat and Wai even go as far as exchanging phone numbers in the name Pran's sanity

further Totally Not Friendship shenanigans include:

Wai accidentally sends Pat a text he meant to send Pran. Pat responds exclusively in emojis in a text so long it fills the whole chat. Wai will not take this challenge laying down, cracks his knuckles, starts typing

Pat helpfully stands over Wai's shoulder and corrects his calculus and physics homework. the fact that he's good at teaching both is downright offensive, much to Wai's dismay. Wai finds his revenge when he shows Pat shortcuts and tricks for CAD (design software), and now the two of them are actively helping each other with their homework but like, pettily

Pat: uh oh by junior doctor is u Wai: ????what are you talking about, you know my english isnt that good *one google translate later* Wai: HEY FUCK OFF

one time Pat, Pran, Korn, and Wai see Ming on campus. Pat doesn't want to see his dad. for obvious reasons, Pran can't be seen by Ming. Korn is always willing to have a friend's back, except he can't make up good cover stories to save his life. embracing the deep wells of his practiced obnoxiousness, Wai's time has come

(he pretends to be a very new, very confused, but very earnest campus tour guide who's convinced Ming is a parent he lost from his main tour group, and proceeds to forcibly drag Ming every which way looking for said imaginary tour group while giving Ming an almost entirely incorrect tour of Ming's own faculty. Wai very nearly fails because the other three follow after them and barely manage to muffle their laughter. it's the closest Pat's ever come to admitting he actually likes the guy)

this:

basically Pat and Wai's combined energy is the b99 quote "the new plan is: no plan! we wing it! probably won’t work, but i said it with a lot of confidence" and i think it's a shame we don't force friendship on the two of them so we can enjoy it

[[ask me about the fic I'm not writing]]

#bad buddy #pat & wai forced friendship fic #aahhh the stories i could force onto these two #*chef's kiss* #ask game: fics im not writing #*give credit and tag me if you write anything inspired by this post thank you <3

[soft-boi-eli]

OMG CAN I REQUEST CC!PHILZA INTRODUCING HIS ADOPTED EMO CHILD TO THE REST OF THE SBI/DSMP

Gender neutral pls they/them

Of course! I've been having a bit of shortages on ideas. So this is so fucking welcomed.

Anyways

Father CC!Philza x Emo! Reader

Pronouns:they/them

Summary:your old parents gave you up as a teen, overflowing you with emotions, causing depression, mood swings, and quite a bit of anxiety. When you got adopted by a man and a lady,both seemingly very kind and understanding. You felt happy. They didnt expect the sleepy bois to come and visit so soon.

Tw:anxiety attacks, mention of depression, loving clothes (not a tw but damn I sometimes miss my old fashion sense.), mention of trauma, swearing!

A huge new family

They dont blame their biological family. They knew that they were being overwhelming. Slowly shifting into a state of mind where fluffy black and colored hair was their favorite. Their outfits became more extravagant and their makeup took a turn for the darker. But they didnt have to put them up for adoption.

About a year in and out of foster families, a few months in an orphanage, then one more foster family. It was official. They were the new child of philza.

Your life got better. Both of them accepted your choice of clothes and makeup, even supported it!

They helped with everything in the first few weeks. Giving you space, letting you know that they were there. But you nor phil knew that three boys were heading down to visit.

So when you answered the door to see three faces demanding philza minecraft and one just looking awkward. They were also changing about him coming and join them you felt panic flood through you. Slamming the door on their face you held near your chest.

Your uneven breathing was heard by your father and he was quick to scoop you away from the door and have kristin answer the door.

He was sitting next to you hand lightly rubbing your shoulder and he guided you through the panic attack. "That's it. In through the nose. Hold it for a few second. Breathe out." His voice was calm.

It took less time to calm you down then you've ever had. "There ya go mate. Just keep breathing." He kept coaching you through you panic attack.

Kristen let the four in with their promise of keeping calm. Your shaking form brought major concern to the two older ones and confusion to the two younger ones. "(Y/n) I want to introduce you to the four behind us. Technoblade, wilbur, tommy, and tubbo. They are really good friends of mine." Nodding lightly you sat there, not wanting to turn because if you did the panic would strike harder. Remembering what happened before you parents left you.

A huge group of people basically shunned your for your choices and didnt want to take you in because 'trash like you' wasnt accepted in the family. But these two were different. Supporting you with your choices. How different were their friends? "Hey I think you shirt is cool! Who's on it?" A slightly hyper voice broke through the silence. " black veil brides." It was quite but a start. "Cool! So their a band right? What kind of songs?" The brown haired teen was trying to communicate with you. "Uhm. Rock." It had started small but you opened up to the teens. They were about you age and they didnt bash what you decided to like. The two older ones hung out with phil and Kristen. You three hung out in your room which was kind of softer then your appearance. It was to reflect a bit deeper into you. Bookshelves, a desk, reading corner, and a bed. Not fully knowing what to put in there.

But you, tommy, and tubbo were almost the best of friends when they had to leave. Techno and Wilbur it took a bit. After the two teens left you had came out of your room, no makeup, hair had all products removed, and your clothes changed from Jean's and a black veiled brides shirt to a black tee shirt, grey sweat pants, with a book in hand.

Before sleeping you just chilled in the living room, reading while basking in the presence of your adoptive parents. You did not expect wilbur and techno to still be there.

Plopping down on the couch next to phil you opened your book and tried to zone out, to get engulfed into the book. Nope. Two sets of eyes just watching you.

"So you like poems?" The book you were reading was a massive collection of poems. Looking up to the two on the couch you nodded lightly.

Looking back down you felt nervous. "Small talk is awkward." Looking up to the brown haired guy with an American accent you nodded. "Same." Once more you looked down at your book. You already had issues focusing but you tried to work though it. "What kind of poems are you favorite?" You sat there for a second. Trying to think of something that catches your attention.

"Mainly ones about trauma. It reminds me I'm not the only one in the word that went through something I have. It just makes it more interesting when I can relate." It was true. Sometimes the poems you liked ring a little to close to home.

"Good choice. It does really intrigue the audience when they can relate." Nodding you closed your book. "Especially when you relate. It's a must for me. Other wise I get turned away from it and just cant focus. But if I like it then I am just dead set on that poem."

You and techno bonded over poems and wilbur brought up some songs. "So what is you song preference?" "Hollywood undead, black veil brides, other then that its random. If I like the song it's in my playlist." With no other preferences with music other then it had to sound good to you there was honestly no judgement for other people's taste in music. There were little treasures from almost all genres.

For a while you talked about poems and songs. It honestly helped you feel safer with them. They didnt care about what you found intriguing. Or why. You even went on a rant and there was no care. They just listened.

But sadly they had to leave. Bit they promised that they would visit more. They were like the brothers you never had.

"So I see that you were able to talk to all of them." Nodding to your father figure you smiled "they were nice. Honestly. I cant wait to see them again."

He found joy in you wanting to hang out with his friends/technically children too.

Now meet the rest of the dream smp. It was very fast. Meeting almost all of them at the same time.

Phil was streaming and no one except for the sleepy bois knew about you. So you walked into his stream, book in hand and sat on the couch behind his set up. You liked having another person on the room. You just hated being alone. It gave you really bad thoughts. "Who's that behind you phil?" A random donation read out. Phil looking behind himself saw you in the corner reading and you normally did. "Ah that's my child. They like to have company. So sometimes they come in here to read." "Wait you have a child?! Since when?" The voice made you jump. Your book fell out of your hands and you looked at your father's screen. A green man with a weird white blob for a skin on minecraft. "Yeah. I took a break to pick them up from the orphanage." All hell broke loose. You ran while phil answered questions. You were not dealing with that. No way. Nuh uh. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Not today satan. It took phil bribing you with a trip to hot topic to get you to come back in. I mean hey you get to score a few shirts and hats. Might as well.

Meeting the server wasbt too bad. But the questions were weird. You didnt answer the ones you were uncomfortable about and they didnt care. Your boundries were up. And when tommy, tubbo, willbur, and techno revealed they knew of you they were yelled at. It was funny. Watching people say they should of said something. But it resulted in alot of compliments and Phil's chat loving you.

You were now the older sibling of the chat. Why? Cause chat said so.

When you come in from now on the chat is chanting for you. Just "(y/n)!" Over and over.

Your life? Crazy. But it became a bit better after you were living with your new parents. It was heaven.

I'm sorry if its awkward I'm not good at introductions. And I am tis but a sleep deprived human. I need sleep and so do you have a nice day and once more I'm sorry if this isnt up to what you wanted.

#dsmp philza #philza #philza x reader #phliza mcyt #mcyt fluff #mcyt

[oh-my-moomin]

NGE: You Deserve Love

This is an analysis based solely on the og NGE anime series and not the movie or rebirth series so I won’t be mentioning those.

NGE is a psychological horror/apocalypse story dressed up as a mecha. This farce is only totally dropped in the last 2, even 3 episodes. This can make the ending jarring and seem in cohesive, but ultimately my understanding is that none of the ‘plot’ really matters. Seele doesn’t matter, where the angels come from doesn’t really matter, and the final battle doesn’t matter. This is a story exploring loss, the need for connection, loneliness, and humanity. We see this through not only the interactions of the human characters but also through the angels.

THE HUMANS

The Children

A defining trait of all the characters is that they are lonely. The isolation from human connection is brought on both by the high stress apocalypse they all live in, as well as the personal demons they face. The characters all attempt to create bonds with other people, but are held back by their insecurities, fear of vulnerability, and past traumas.

Let’s start with Shinji, as the main character. Having lost his mother at a young age, and being abandoned by this father, he was never able to feel secure. Therefore he takes on a people pleaser attitude, constantly apologizing. His want for validation (particularly from adults in his life) causes him to continue to take action that he doesn't want to, including piloting the EVA. His self hate and insecurity makes it hard for him to make and trust his own choices. So he relies on others to guide him. When this fails, when he doesn't get the love and validation he craves he tries to quite entirely. But this often leads to the people he cares about being hurt. He's trapped between a rock and hard place.

Asuka was also abandoned, however rather than craving support like Shinji, she chooses to live for herself. She craves independence. She needs to know that she is no longer a child that can be hurt and vulnerable. This is largely shown through both her overt sexuality, and her piloting the EVA. She must be in control of the EVA, she must have power, she must be able to prove herself as the best, the strongest. Because inside she still feels like that hurt desperate child, and that is what she hates most about herself. Unlike Shinji, Asuka is brash and rude, and she expects others to give her the same. She barks and expects you to bark back, but can’t always handle it. 

Both of these characters are constantly looking for connection, with both their peers and adults. While Asuka often pushes herself on to people, out of a need to be seen. Shinji cannot take active moves to make meaningful connections, and will shy away from people trying to connect. Asuka hates herself and needs to prove that others love her. Shinji hates himself and cannot imagine that people love him. 

The Adults

One of the running themes in the show is motherhood. Typically it is the mother that is expected to love and care for the child, to raise them, show unconditional love, give unwavering support. None of the characters have had this, Shinji and Asuka search for validation that they lost in adults in different ways. Unfortunately for them, none of the adults present are suitable to be parents. 

The show makes a point to show that the adult characters are all more complex than the children. They have lived longer and therefore had more time to make mistakes, to get stuck in toxic ideals, to ‘be problematic’. They are not concretely good or bad people (mostly), but rather the result of people who grew up in a post apocalyptic world, trying desperately to stop the salvage it, while also trying to make their own connections. Like the child characters, their past traumas make it harder for them to be more open, vulnerable, and weak, to form that human connection. 

I am going to focus on Misato and Ritsuko, since they act as foils when it comes to human connection.

Misato being left as a lone survivor to a terrible accident has left her scared both physically and mentally. Before this she had issues with her parents, as her father seemed to abandon his family in favour of work, leaving her mother devastated. Misato doesn't want to become like her mother, abandoned by a loved one, and she also doesn't want to be her father, a slave to work. To counter this she looks for easy connections, but she never wants to get too close.

When her relationship with Kaji was beginning to feel too real, she began to find flaws. His resemblance to her father was terrifying, so she broke it off. Similarly, when in scenes with Shinji, talking about his insecurities or his want to give up, she is hidden by shadow. She cannot be seen as weak, she cannot offer comfort, she cannot be a mother figure to Shinji. Other ways her searching for easy connection is her drinking beer, or eating take out. She searches for the most basic ways to fulfill her needs, so that she can focus on her main goal of defeating the angels. 

Ritsuko is also desperate to find human connection without vulnerability. By fully closing off the whole world she can have no weakness, something which she resents in Misato. She views herself as above the need for connection in that way, and would rather follow in her mothers foot footsteps as a scientist and a woman. 

She loved and admired her mother, and hated her. She wants to follow in her footsteps but also would hate to fail in the same ways. She saw how her mother failed to actually mother her, and chose to completely reject that part of herself. Instead she cares for cats, and uses those as a surrogate to having a child. She continues her mothers work as a scientist, constantly striving to improve. And when it comes to the ‘woman’ that her mother was, she knew a stubborn woman who focused solely on one man. So Ritsuko also focused on him, to the point of giving up her cat to her grandmother. Both women tried to create an easy connection with him, both felt that they were his equal, and that they found the one connection that mattered. When it was proven to them that they were a second (third) woman this caused them both to break down. For Ritsuko this meant that even though she closed off the whole world, except for one man, she was still too vulnerable. And her only response was to completely shut down. Because she had no one else.

All of the characters are constantly searching for this connection, trying to show affection without getting hurt. Trying to make sense of the end of the world while also making sense of interpersonal relationships. Their own inner demons getting in the way of honest connection. 

Rei

As a clone Rei is a particular case. She is aware that she is not a ‘person’, she isnt meant for human connection. Her isolation is so ingrained into her, planned before she is even ‘born’ so she feels no need to care for anyone except Ikari. She latches onto him, would do anything for him, and has no value in her life because she is aware that she is not real. 

However, she still has a human source, Shinjis mother. A human person, who also needed human connection. Rei, when given the chance, does care for people. Shinji is the first person to see her as a peer, and to treat her with kindness. With this start of forming connections, she begins to feel more human, to develop a further need to connect. Even if it's hard to fully separate from the man who created her.

THE ANGELS

The angels act as a foil to the human need for connection. While all of the human characters are lonely and searching for connection with each other, the angels are also lonely and trying to learn what that even means. 

There is no scene where the angels are working together, they are solitary, all having the same goal of reaching Adam, but incapable of planning together to achieve it. They instead try to create connection to humans, trying to bond and understand them, without knowing that their methods are harmful. 

I believe this can be first seen with the 12th angel. When Shinji is absorbed into the EVA, it is safe to say that the angel was able to understand the merging of human and EVA. This connection allowed Shinji to control the EVA to break free of the angel's shadow. The following month where Shinji is trapped within his EVA, is our first insight into what the human instrumentality project will be like, as well as the goals of the angels. 

Since angels cannot connect to each other, the 15th angel attempts to create connection by forcing itself into Asukas mind. It wants to understand her, her emotions, her thoughts, her connections, her love. For her this is a painful experience, akin to rape. She feels dirtied after it. But the attack is a beam of light, with holy music playing, what should be a calming experience. I believe it is fair to say that the angel cannot understand that it is putting her through pain, as it cannot understand any human experiences. Angels are incapable of understanding their own feelings/experiences/wants, and try to use humans as a study from which they can learn. 

The following angel confronts Rei about her loneliness. Instead of breaking into her mind through light, it directly entered her body. While talking with her, it questioned what loneliness was, trying to understand its own pain and isolation through understanding hers. Its solution is to merge with Rei, as it believes this would solve both problems. 

However, when she refuses, the angel then tries to find another source of connection. Rei cares about Shinji, as both a clone of his mother, and a friend as her own person. The angel can see that this connection is something that she finds precious and tries to take it for itself, as it cannot understand why Shinji wouldn’t feel the same. It cannot understand how complex human connections are, that it cannot simply take Reis form. However, it has learned what pain is, and how to communicate its own pain. As seen when Shinji attacks it. Whether this pain is physical or emotional doesn't matter, because it is the first pain that the angel could express.

The angels discovering what loneliness is acts as a way for the human pilots to begin to explore their own isolation in more depth. For better or worse.

THE FINAL MESSENGER

Our introduction to the final angel is him singing. He takes a human form, can fully communicate to other humans, and doesn’t immediately attack them. This is such a contrast to all other angels that it isn't immediately clear that he even is an angel. Kaworu's first words are (as per the netflix english subtitles)

“Arent songs great? Songs enrich the heart. They're the crowning achievement of Lilin culture” 

He loves humans, human culture, human lives, and the human world. He is the first angel who is able to show this. His ability to understand humans allows him to form human connections, and he does so with Shinji. 

Kaworu loved Shinji. He would seek out Shinji, take time to bond and communicate with him, and help Shinji open up. He wanted to be close with Shinji, and knew how to be gentle in ways that no other human or angel could. He was patient, because he had time. And Shinji was able to open up to him more than with any other character. Shinji  was able to take the initiative to ask to stay with him, to try and form that connection.

All the human characters are struggling with their own demons, with an apocalyptic world. The whole earth is at war and Shinji is in the front lines, surrounded by adults who may want to help him but ultimately can't. Saving everyone is a higher priority to saving one kid, especially when that kid is your strongest soldier. Throughout the series Shinji is given conditional love. It is only when he pilots the EVA, defeats the angels and saves the day that people give him validation. Then comes this boy, who is gentle and kind, who listens. And it's easy, its comfort, its understanding and unconditional love, and its exactly what Shinji has needed for the whole series. 

But as a messenger he could never stay, he's temporary and by the end of the episode he understands this. He still is driven to ‘Adam’, he has a mission, but instead he is confronted with Lilith. Kaworu understands that humans and angels cannot live together in harmony, only one can survive. Both Adam and Litlith were made in god's image, but only Adam could stay in the garden of Eden. Death and Life hold equal value to Kaworu, so he doesn't mind the sacrifice, he would rather die to protect humans, to protect Shinji. He can  also understand that this is difficult, this is murder, this is killing a friend. So he says “thank you” and he waits.

In other episodes when in a battle, Shinji is constantly being yelled at, told what to do, under constant pressure. But here there is just the same patient understanding that Kaworu has always shown him. No rush for him to take action, just time to process and grieve. Because Kaworu knows Shinji will make the hard choice and he waits, and he smiles, and he continues to love Shinji. 

The final angel came down as a messenger and said

“You are important. 

I want to talk to you, to know you. 

You are in pain, you are fragile and should be protected. 

You are worthy of my affection. 

I like you. I love you. I was born just so that I could meet you. 

Our kind cannot survive together, one of us must die. And you deserve to live. 

I will take this burden of death because you deserve a future. 

I am glad I could meet you, thank you. 

I know this is hard, and I know you need time. I will wait.

Thank you.”

That was the last message to humanity.

And because Shinji is human he says back

“We are the same. I love you too. If only one of us could have lived it should have been you. You are better than me. You should have survived.”

#nge #neon genesis evangelion #shinji ikari #nge analysis #asuka langley sohryu #misato katsuragi #rei ayanami #ritsuko akagi #gendo ikari #kaworu nagisa

[lunaflvms]

🌷🧚‍♀️🧼; ᝰꜜ ᩠˚ 𖤐 fairy of shampoo !

profiles two - hyunjin’s emo cult

descriptions !

hyunjin: a senior, majors in visual arts and dance, new to hybe university. hyunjin has been a demon for over 1000 years and has “helped” at least 15 people in his lifetime, he’s pretty young for a demon. being a demon and guiding humans wasn’t necessarily bad, it’s just the way they use to help them like if ur broke than they would probably encourage you to rob a bank and then help you cover up. he became a demon because in his past life he was scared of dying and he was really ill for most of his life and before dying he had been turned into a demon by satan (with consent ofc) he was actually just going to visit some old friends in Seoul but was asked to go help out a sophomore boy named riki.

sunghoon: a junior, majors in design/fashion, hes been friends with hyunjin for quite a long time now and met him while hunting for food/blood one night, introduced him to his friends and they got along really well. known around hybe university for being the ice prince because of his ice skating skills and his prince like visuals. also lives in a house with the rest of the friendgroup thats located in the middle of no where 😵‍💫. cullen family who?

jake: a junior, majors in maths and physics, met hyunjin through sunghoon and was really fascinated to see a demon? jay thought he was weird because hes literally part of the supernatural too. jakes really social around at hybe so he has a lot of connections around town.

jay: a junior, majors in fashion/design, also met hyunjin through sunghoon. oldest of the “02s” not born in 02 in this smau but on their certificates and everything their under 2002. pays for most the friendgroups stuff cuz hes like super rich or whatever.

heeseung: a senior, majors in music, met hyunjin before sunghoon after he accidentally spilled coffee on hyunjin, literally straight outta a fanfic 🤕 he always has fur on him? part of the dance club and one of hybe university’s top students.

yeonjun: a senior, majors in dance and design, was actually the one that saw hyunjin sitting in the middle of the woods at night while hunting. part of the dance club and the oldest of the friend group. has been a model for some small magazines and is pretty popular around campus.

soobin: a senior, majors in psychology, met hyunjin with sunghoon and yeonjun when hunting, since hyunjin, soobin and yeonjun are closer within age range theyre much closer. one of the only sane ones in this friend group, also modelled in few small magazines with yeonjun.

taehyun: a junior, majors in photography and literature, last to meet hyunjin and the groups one and only functioning brain cell. this man can literally do anything and everything like broken window? taehyun can fix it, want to know if your s/o is loyal to you? taehyun’s got you. also the only one that isnt emo in this friend group

previous masterlist next

author’s notes: didnt add what type of mythical creatures the people in the friendgroup was for you guys to guess 😋 help i was too busy crying over how i accidentally deleted my original one 😓 but finally finished this. it takes so long thinking of the characters in this story like personality and backstory.

taglist: @renjunvrse @nrksrealgf @woopetals @enhacolor @blaaiissee @nightzu @sncrly-mn @starlosthyunjin @hwangprint @soobin-chois @mybabywearschanel @catecita

permanent taglist: @missmadwoman @acciomylove

#hyunjin smau #hyunjin social media au #skz smau #hyunjin x reader #enhypen social media au #skz imagines #skz x reader #skz hyunjin #straykids x reader #straykids smau #stray kids #straykids social media au #hwang hyunjin #hyunjin fluff #hyunjin imagines #fairy of shampoo! #lunaflvms