#this should be a fanvid tbh

[heyholmesletsgo]

Face the thing that should not be

For @frost-and-snow​ day 6 theme of regret, a fanvid of fierce corpse Song Lan

#The Untamed #Song Lan #frostandsnow2023 #The Thing That Should Not Be #my fanvid #mis cosas #Metallica loves Cthulhu tbh

[jtl07]

jt (finally) watches warrior nun - s1 e3 (pt 1)

Y'all didn't even warn me that this was gonna be that episode?! I near fell out of my chair when I realized this episode had not only the cafeteria/meal scene but also the hug and the hallway scene. Again, strange to know the scenes from fanvids and clips and only now see them in context lol

Anyway it should come to no surprise that I have SO MANY THOUGHTS. So many that I'm going to have to split this episode into either 2 or 3 posts just to talk about Avatrice because the cafeteria scene alone has me feral. Why? Because I'm convinced that it's this scene that builds the foundation for Avatrice.

Everyone points to s1 ep8 as being formative - and rightly so, what with all the face touching lol - but that wasn't the cause, it was an effect, a "symptom" of something that had been building before that. I think s1 ep8 is when they start being aware of their connection, their attraction - I think the cafeteria scene is when that connection begins.

By itself, the cafeteria scene isn't much - tbh, the only thing I'd taken from it before sitting down to watch the series properly was the "not everything is about you" line because of the callback in s2 finale. But taken in context, it's quite a vulnerable scene.

Side note: Many years ago, when I was seriously preparing to go into acting, I was recommended the book "Audition" by Michael Shurtleff. One of the things that stuck with me - in both writing fiction and life in general - is this idea that you have to constantly answer this question: "Why is your character here?" Like, even if the script has them being mean to the other character on stage with them or even outright saying that they want to leave, there's got to be a reason that they're still there - why else would they even be there in the first place? (and it's the actor's job to develop what that reason is, even if it’s never said outright)

So if we look at the cafeteria scene, it very well could not have happened. Ava could have noped out of that room the moment she'd laid eyes on Lilith or when the sisters started leaving. Beatrice herself could have also left. At any point in the conversation, one or both of them could have ended it.

But they didn't. They wanted to believe in people's kindness, wanted a bit of kindness, period. What's beautiful is the arc of the interaction: It starts out rough but slowly they both bend, just a little, give just a little bit of themselves - it's a seed planted, this scene, and I love so much of it.

Okay let's take it from the top. The thing is, most clips (e.g. this one) I've found start with Ava already sitting down next to Beatrice with that infamous voiceover - but I want to actually start before that. Remember: The scene directly before this was Mother Superion and Lilith's first "test" (let's be real, that wasn't a test, it was bullying), and while Ava laughs it off, we know that that's her way of coping - which she says outright during this scene. Coming into the cafeteria at all is incredibly brave after having been faced with such meanness, and then have to face even more meanness in the form of "middle school" style shunning. But she still keeps going, she still chooses to try again, with Beatrice.

Speaking of Beatrice: Her first choice is to stay. Look here - she takes note of Ava setting down her tray and the others whispering and leaving. Sure, she puts her head down and it kinda looks like she's just trying to ignore Ava but still - she doesn't leave.

When Ava makes that middle school comment, Beatrice starts out cold, a bit scolding when she advises Ava to "not treat everything like a joke" and how the halo wasn't just hanging around. But the delivery here is brilliant - KTY could've gone harsher here, tapped into the anger that seems to always be just under the surface with Bea (more on that when I write up my thoughts on s1 ep4), but there's a softness, a grief that she allows to come through. And see, it's that moment of vulnerability, that bending, that hope for kindness that allows Ava also to bend and actually apologize.

And then we have Ava trying again to connect - either because of guilt or because she's desperate for a friend or just to understand in general - and she gives Beatrice the space to share.

Beatrice could have refused. She could have rebuffed her, could have walked away. KTY's choices here are fantastic, how she pauses, how she takes this little breath (00:50 here). The question has unsettled Bea, taken her surprise maybe, but she pushes through, answers Ava honestly. She starts off so matter-of-fact, then slowly starts to thaw. There's beautiful support musically by the bgm piano: a repeated note, akin to the monotone of Beatrice's voice. Then Bea's face changes - and there's a quiet arpeggio that's timed perfectly with it (1:00 here). It's a beautiful touch.

I couldn't help but get this sense of this being cathartic for Beatrice, as if she'd been waiting for a chance to share this, I mean, look at how her face brightens in memory.

What's interesting with Ava is that we don't get a voice over for the rest of this scene - the only sense we get of her discomfort is when she says, "I'm not her, you know." It's the closest we get to her admitting that she's scared shitless - and visually, it's symbolized with her pushing back the hood and allows herself to be seen, to be vulnerable.

And what does Bea do? She immediately comforts, reassures, with such wide eyes and steadiness: "No one expects you to be."

It's a very brief moment, but so, so important: whereas everyone else has been pressuring Ava, trying to get her to do something they want, here is someone who is telling her it's okay to just be who she is.

And yknow, now that I think about it, a lot of this is probably Bea seeing some of herself in Ava. She directly says it with that "It was wasn't me either" line, but I wonder if it's also in the "no one expects you to be" line too - how her parents had expected her to be a certain way, to "fall in line" etc. And probably why she has that small smile when Ava says "It just isn't me"

I don't know if this was a conscious choice by KTY but there's also a moment in the hallway scene where she does a similar small smile - idk I feel like it tends to be moments when she's reassuring Ava. In any case, it's a nice touch.

And then Bea's famous lines, "We all have a past, Ava..." What's interesting here is that in the beginning of the interaction, Bea was hardly meeting Ava's eyes. When she starts talking about Shannon, there are some brief moments when she meets Ava's gaze, but she mostly shies away from Ava's stare. Once she moves into a more reassuring mode, she starts to hold Ava's gaze longer, trying to convince, trying to give comfort.

Can we just talk about how Bea delivers that last line? Taken at face value, "Not everything is about you" can come off really harsh. But Beatrice says it so gently, as if it's not meant as an admonition - part apology maybe (that everyone has their own pain to deal with), part plea (echoing maybe Vincent's direct ask for patience later on), and part encouragement (something like "you'll get through this").

And we end with Ava thoughtful but we're not privy to her thoughts, we're without voice over and just Alba's incredible ability to express so many emotions with just her face.

idk the majority of this is probably just nonsense but whatever, I'm having fun with this lol - I'll write up thoughts about the hug and the hallway scene probably next week, unless I get a lull during my travels this weekend.

#jt watches wn #warrior nun #avatrice #sister beatrice #should i be writing fic? probably #i'm gonna count this as research lol #i just have so many thoughts so here i am rambling and rambling and rambling

[erstwhilesparrow]

I just saw that post you reblogged about archiving MCYT stuff - is there a particular reason stuff disappears so often? (That's very cool people are putting in so much effort to preserve it, though; big respect to that tbh)

reyni! :D okay i should be clear upfront that some of my information may be incomplete here because (1) i don't have twitter and (2) i'm not directly involved in any mcyt archival efforts. also putting this under a cut because it's long and i do need to reference recent events involving abuse and sexual assault:

despite mcyt = minecraft youtube(r), a lot of stuff relevant to mcyt happens like. exclusively on stream? really, really ~plot-critical or deeply characterizing stuff happens on stream sometimes and never makes it into a youtube video! and on twitch at least, unless you explicitly set it to save your vods, twitch will just delete them after a certain number of days. i don't know exactly how this works if you stream on youtube but also my impression is that a significant majority of people are not streaming on youtube anyway. since fairly early in my time in mcyt fandoms, there's been concern about creators not saving their own vods, and on top of that, sometimes you save a vod and it gets taken down anyway for copyright infringement (playing copyrighted music, the creator themself asked for it to be removed, etc). so like. as baseline, there's a sense of inherent ephemerality to the medium. that post i reblogged is explicitly pushing back against the description of mcyt vods as "a constantly burning library of alexandria," and in light of the evidence that follows i agree (and also am a little weepy about the efforts people make to save these things), but that sense doesn't come from nowhere, you know?

speaking of that post though, i suspect this archival stuff is coming up More now because it's been a rough couple of weeks in mcyt fandom. several really influential creators in the space were recently outed as being abusive or predatory in a way that's caught a lot of attention, and many people in response have been (understandably!) deleting their fanworks or otherwise distancing or removing themselves from mcyt fandom. i want to be clear, i know stuff gets deleted all the time in fanspaces -- the internet is kind of just Like That in terms of how easy it is to lose things -- and it's incredibly fair to go "no, even if there was a strong distinction between character and creator this leaves a sour taste in my mouth and i'm not doing this anymore." i don't want to pretend that no one has ever deleted a fanwork outside of mcyt spaces, and i don't want to insinuate that it's bad to vocally revoke your support of those creators -- those people have done awful things and generally failed to meaningfully apologize or take accountability, and it is worth remembering and saying so. but to give you a sense of numbers: antimony-medusa does monthly stats on mcyt fic on ao3, and dsmp, which even after it's kind of died off has seen monthly increases in the range of hundreds of new fic per month, saw a decrease of roughly 800 fics. other fandoms have similarly seen decreases, and video blogging rpf, which ao3 treats as an umbrella for basically all mcyt stuff, saw an increase of 51, as compared to last month's increase of (approximately) 3500. and that's just fic -- there's also a rich trove of animatics, fanvids, fanart, etc that i don't have any numbers for, but i've seen people talking about deleting those, too, you know? you see how people might be worried about what we are losing.

at this point i think your question is answered, but if you'll forgive some baseless speculation here, i wonder to what extent mcyt is also. complicated by how closely character and creator can sit? i don't know how other people feel, but there is a difference to me between "i've written fic about This Person Specifically (or, arguably, their streamer persona which may be somewhat divorced from the Real Life Human Being Behind The Screen)" and "i've written fic about a character this person plays." i dunno, there's a sense to me of the flimsiness of the line between creator and character and then also of the line between creator and fandom that i think makes it harder to be like "okay, i am doing my own thing, separate from the creator, so i'm going to keep my stuff public even if i don't stand by it 100% anymore." i remember when i first joined mcyt fandom, there was a period of time people were really worried that the creators were actively on ao3, or that fans would try to send their fanfic directly to the creators. i thought to myself, "well, if anyone Tries Shit with my work, i will simply delete all my relevant accounts and disappear." that's... not really a back-up plan that i feel good about these days, but. you know. it's been a thing, if not always for the same reasons, and i do understand the impulse.

#chattering sparrow #is this... a helpful explanation? does it clarify anything for you? #i've been having a weird week for reasons unrelated to ~fandom bullshit but wow the bullshit has certainly not helped #thank you for the ask though! gave me the kick i needed to go back and add disclaimers to some of my existing fic

[saint-cecilias]

tagged by @loisfreakinglane <33333

last song: Sprung by Mariah Carey!! one of her deepest cuts that i think EVERYONE should know about cause it's so goddamn good and it was so ahead of it's time for a song released in 2005!!

currently watching: lol a long ass but super interesting video essay about the impact of LOST on modern television. how it changed the scope of tv and how it helped and hurt how television is consumed today. if anyone wants the link hmu!

three ships: god off the top of my head: cause i'm currently doing a rewatch of the show- klaus/camille [the originals]. cause i watched a beautiful fanvid of these two yesterday- alex/henry [RWRB] and cause i'm bout to watch the latest episode of Wild Cards: max x cole [wild cards cw]

favorite color: lately i've been in a purple phase tbh. so imma say purple. ALL OF THE PURPLES.

currently consuming: honey roasted pistachios!

first ship: this is such a hard question cause i feel like i been shipping for my whole life. but for the purposes of this imma say: angela/shawn [boy meets world]

relationship status: *FLASHES WEDDING RING IN A FLOURISH* I'M MARRIED, BITCHES!!!

last movie: i rewatched American Fiction today and it's such a good fucking movie. like honestly one of the best i've seen in a long time and in a perfect world it SHOULD win best picture at the Oscars tbh.

currently working on: lol a massive case atm which has been taking up a lot of my time and honestly intellectual power???? like my head feels fucking big rn. it's full of secrets and legal info. but it's probably the biggest and most important case of my career thus far and if it swings in my favor, i get to help a LOT of people. which is why i got into this in the first place.

tagging anyone who wants to do this!!!

#mai does a meme #txt

[lacrimae23]

olicity youtube

💬 [my comment] kay i think i'm gonna go cry now. bye this is so beautiful and heartbreaking i think it's important to remember/show what oliver meant to felicity, too. she LOST him. i always thought arrow should develop this part of the show some more. i know they touched on some of it, but i needed more tbh. i always wanted creators to explore this particular part of the show more and this fanvid was just perfection in that case. thank you!!

#arrow #oliver queen #felicity smoak #olicity #otp #oliver x felicity #youtube #olicity fandom #olicityedit #Youtube

[daincrediblegg]

I know this is most likely gonna sound so cringe BUT I can’t help but picture a little amv of John Pruitt with To The End by MCR bc god dammit !!! He may have done a fucked up and Wrong Thing but he did it bc he wanted to be with his girl and daughter again, as messy as he was his intentions were good initially 😭 atleast they died together T_T

NO NO!!!!! NOT CORNY IN THE SLIGHTEST!!!! YOU'RE SO RIGHT!!!!!! (also that's one of my fave pulls from black parade good GOD!!! Another I think would be such a BANGER for him is This Is How I Disappear- the air of regret it has???? I mean GOD. also I feel like I have a literal religious experience whenever I listen to it tbh... god someone should make that fanvid stat...)

#man. him and millie still kill me. mike did not have to do it like that #rip to all the father paul fics I never finished too like damn #seriously one of the most guys of all time like good god #the man hardwire reset my brain and I thank him every day for it

[prettyboybuckley]

It seems like we’re both bored at the same time, so here is something to take some of your braincells : can you sort fandom creation types (as in fanfic, fanart, playlist, podfic...) from your favorite to least favorite? ~bonus point if you give links 🤓

hii!!

oh that's a very good question. sorry, will not provide links cause i don't think i could only put a few links, but i don't have the beans to do a lot of them 😔

also this ranking should not be taken too seriously because all forms of fandom creation are worth the same and deserve love an appreciation!! these are mostly based on how much i consume and create of it myself

fanfic my beloved, i don't know how i'd live without it

love me some fanart - how are people so talented???

gifs!!! (partially because i used to gif)

i have watched *a lot* of (all kinds of) fanvids in my lifetime tbh

i don't really listen to podfics (or podcasts or anything like it) because of auditory processing issues but i do think they deserve so much more appreciation for all the hard work that goes into it and for providing an alternative to reading

and now i'm done ranking things and everything else gets a shared sixth place 🙈 cosplay, playlists, moodboards (those are technically fanart maybe?), rec lists, etc etc

✨ Ask me nosy questions (on anon) ✨

#oh look the mailman came by! #fairydustedtheory #ask games

[yeetlegay]

hello your post re: porsche being full of contradictions and driving you insane (mood tbh) just made me think someone should make an edit set to bitch by alanis morrisette. he IS a sinner and a saint, he does not feel ashamed. he's your hell he's your dream and you would NOT have it any other way.

@ fanvid masters: I am begging

#kinnporsche #yeetle asks #why don’t queue stay

[juneviews]

youtube anon here!! omg thank you!! sorry im so late with this i was busy bc deepavali + wanted to make sure id thought of everything to ask ahsjdjdkf and ofc if you decide not to reply to this i understand as well, so really no pressure at all, okay? 😊 what software do you use to edit your videos? what made you decide to start making videos? do your videos get taken down bc of copyright? how do you deal if/when that happens? what are some of your favourite kinds of videos to make, and why? how long do you usually spend on a video (idea conception, filming, editing etc)? and since i know you from this blog, even before you started making videos: do you have any advice about putting out content in fandom? bc you make gifs + write + make videos and like. idk im just wondering if you ever feel shy about posting? (not that you should bc for real everything you put out is great- including all the off pictures you keep posting… thank you for that btw i dont have social media so thats the only way i get to see his beautiful face) i guess it sounds stupid but IM really really shy and the thought of putting anything out there for anyone at all to see makes me want to hide forever sdjfhskjg but like. i kinda want to make video edits too. mostly for myself as like a visual journal thing? like its a personal project. but i thought okay since im putting in so much effort why not share it with other people too? and id love if people discovered new music + shows bc of me yknow? but yeah anyway like. how do you deal with it if you ever feel that way? thats all i can think of for now, wow this got LONG. i hope its not too much rip. and again thank you for letting me ask you these questions ❤️

hi, OOF you really had QUESTIONS lmaooooo

I use the free software shortcut to edit my videos. I hate it & it's very slow which makes my already least favorite part of the video making, editing, even worse (:

I decided to start making videos bc 1) I saw a gap in the youtube market where people who talked about bl either did reactions or short analyses without showing their faces. 2) there were many topics that were easier to tackle in a longer video than a blog post. 3) if I were to be able to make a living off of youtube (which will not happen but wish I had known that then lol) it would solve most of my problems & allow me to combine pretty much all of my interests at once.

my videos ABSOLUTELY get taken down bc of copyright, if you look through my community page I've talked about that many times.

when that happens, I always appeal but most of the time it doesn't work, which means I spent 30+ hours MINIMUM on something that will never see the light of day (: it's in big part why I'm switching to thailand focused content instead of thai series content tbh, it was very heavy on my mental health for a hobby that takes so many hours out of me every week. not worth it.

my favorite kinds of videos to film are definitely my ranking ones or reaction ones bc they demand very little preparation & scripting and are just about me rambling for 2 hours, but my ranking ones take FOREVER to edit so on that part any non scripted video is the worst haha

the time spent on a video really depends, but usually the writing of a video takes me between 3 to 6 hours, the filming takes me 2 hours & the editing takes me a good 20 hours (funny bc I hate editing so much lmaooooo.) but some videos have only taken me 10 hours (short reactions), while others have taken me well above 50 (longer commentary ones.)

about putting out content in fandom, you're right in saying that I've basically done every kind of content LMAO. honestly the faceless one like giffing, writing fics, making fanvids, etc. is easy? like it needs to come from a drive of wanting to do it but bc your personal image isn't really attached to it, I feel like the trial & error is easier? if you wanna stop tomorrow no one will really care? but when I started making videos that demand significantly more time & that have my face clearly attached to it, that's when the doubts started creeping in. I never feel shy bc I just haven't been shy in a while, but I do feel ashamed to talk to irl people about my videos bc they aren't successful & I've invested over 2 years of my life in them so it's just kinda pathetic LMAO. but about you being shy, you can focus on the fact that it's the internet? like if you really don't want anyone to know it's your fanvids, create a new username & post them under it, bc then literally NO ONE will know it's you. to be honest it's taken me years but I've gotten rid of the notion of "cringe" and "embarrassment" out of my vocabulary. just do what makes you happy bc people will hate on you no matter what. I just know I personally want to live my life authentically & not filter it just so MAYBE I'm not as hated. so yeah, I hope you DO get to create the fanvids you want & good luck with that! thanks for the support as well, it means a lot <3

xxx

#answers #video making #those were really good questions #you should've been there for my q&a haha

[mr-nauseam]

Finished episode one last night, stayed up way too late to do so and had so many feelings I couldn't fall asleep. The whole episode was perfect but damn that last part at the church? (And guess who hoofed off to see how many fanvids there are of Lestat/Louis set to Take Me to Church? I was surprised at the number given how new this series is tbh.)

And Sam - yes Lestat's actor is named Sam - and Jacob just nails it. And Eric is lovely snarky as Daniel. Btw do they touch again on why Daniel can't recall his first interview? Apart from the rather vague 'he was high' thing?

For me Sam Reid fit rather well with how I pictured Lestat. I read the books long before I knew there was a movie and maybe because of the whole rock star thing I always imagined him looking like a cross between Axl Rose and James Hetfield.

Going to watch e2 tonight and maybe e3 depending on time and on how many feelings I have after I'm done with 2.

Sorry for the delay. My uni has me running from one place to another. You've probably already seen the other episodes, so I hope you enjoyed them (?)

THE CHURCH SCENE. It honestly burned itself into my mind, and I I need to say again that I NEED TO watch it once a day because it was wonderful! (Hahahaha I thought of that song too, I believe its understandable people made edits as soon as they could with that song, and yeah its new but in general this series is from a book saga that had a strong fabase that is coming back, some people in fandom do it to appreciate the series, others to complain about it to infinity haha but that get attention)

YEEES they do and I agreed! Eric looks like a cool Daniel to me hahaha. On that topic, I dontt know if the language thing could make me go wrong but at least Ive understood that its not that he doesnt remember it? just the time passed, in fact you see this great scene where he confronts Louis for his inconsistencies in his previous story vs the current one, although I think the end of the previous interview should have been something different or more shocking to avoid the publication of the book as originally happened I guess, although I must say Im very intrigued by this choice to do a second interview! I wonder how they will make it all fit together.

Oh he does, I just believe the promo pics didnt justice to him, he looks so much better in the actual series and its a delight to see his performance. I read the books before the movie too, but it was at that disastrous time where I was ignorant of the outside world xD, so the first lestat in my head was weird… as were all the characters in my head in those years.

Please come and yell about your thoughts on the eps!

#AnswerIka #iwtv series #iwtv my 13 years old is back #iwtv 2022 #we are yelling

[explainslowly]

What is and what should never be

A real bad Cultural Appropriation, Baby episode. Which is a shame, because the storytelling device is enjoyable to me (and like a classic fanfic trope for a reason tbh).

Lot of Material here:

The beer ad girlfriend, forever recontectualized by Dean Winchester Beat Sheet (sneaky fanfic rec). Like, it is a decision they maybe should have meditated on, that Dean can't think of a singular woman in his life he wants to spend his life with. Literally could have brought back Cassie if they wanted to sell this as him not being weird and closeted.

Dean mowing a perfectly mowed lawn in saturated technicolor. Someone should make a supernatural fanvid to Blackhole Sun.

Cloth mother out in full force here.

God I love the fact that left to his own devices to construct a "perfect" life he arrives at this contraption that torments him profoundly. This man does not know what he wants, is incapable of arriving at the knowledge no matter how hard he tries.

#This man can be closeted in so many exciting ways!! #spn rewatch for your blacklist

[inevitably-johnlocked]

For the Johnlock Playlist,  is a Brazilian Song (much love for you from brazil btw 💞) In english is: You didn't teach me how to forget you by the singer Caetano Veloso

lyric

I haven't seen you for so long // How I wish // To look into your eyes, gain your hugs // It's true, I don't lie

And in this despair I find myself // I already got to the point of changed myself for you several times // Just to see if I find you //

You could forgive me // And just one more time accept me  // I promise, now I'll do everything to never lose you again

Now, what should I do with my life without you? // You didn't teach me how to forget you // You only teach me to want you // And wanting you // I'm trying to find you // I'm keeping losing myself

Seeking your hugs in other arms // Lost in the void of other places // From the abyss that you withdrew and threw me // And left me here alone [...]

Now, what should I do with my life without you? // You didn't teach me how to forget you // You only teach me to want you // And wanting you // I trying to find myself

i also made a video for it :D

https://youtu.be/sTbtzGQaKqQ

the translation can be a little sh*t tbh

Não vejo mais você faz tanto tempo Que vontade que eu sinto De olhar em seus olhos ganhar teus abraços É verdade eu não minto E nesse desespero em que me vejo Já cheguei a tal ponto De me trocar diversas vezes por você Só pra ver se te encontro

Você bem que podia perdoar E só mais uma vez me aceitar Prometo agora vou fazer por onde Nunca mais perdê-la

Agora, que façoo eu da vida sem você? Você não me ensinou a te esquecer Você só me ensinou a te querer E te querendo eu vou tentando te encontrar Vou me perdendo Buscando em outros braços seus abraços Perdido no vazio de outros passos Do abismo que você se retirou e me atirou E me deixou aqui sozinho

Agora, que faço eu da vida sem você? Você não me ensinou a te esquecer Você só me ensinou a te querer E te querendo eu vou tentando me encontrar

E nesse desespero em que me vejo Já cheguei a tal ponto De me trocar diversas vezes por você Só pra ver se te encontro

Você bem que podia perdoar...

Agora...

Vou me perdendo...

(Lyrics from Genius.com)

LOVELY! I totally support y’all promoting your fanvids here hahah!! It’s BEAUTIFUL, and what a GREAT song, omg. Thank you for translating it as well! Great addition to the playlist!!! LOVE IT!!

🎶 LISTEN TO THE JOHNLOCK PLAYLIST ON [SPOTIFY] & [YOUTUBE] 🎶

#steph replies #johnlock playlist #artist caetano veloso #song voce nao me ensinou a te esquecer

[space-feminist]

15 questions, 15 people

tagged by @rembrandtswife

1. Are you named after anyone? yeah, my great-grandmother. i never met her but my mom talks about her as a very loving grandmother, basically another parent to her. she and her family fled lithuania during the 40s as russia began to invade and while i don't know much about that experience i have to imagine my great-grandma was a pretty tough lady, to get her family across europe during the middle of a war. i'm proud to be named after her.

2. When was the last time you cried? a few hours ago, i got teary reading a really good fic

3. Do you have kids? god no

4. What sports do you play/have played? i am not athletic. just a thoroughly uncoordinated person. i like taking walks. going swimming when i can. that's about it.

5. Do you use sarcasm? yeah

6. What's the first thing you notice about people? hair, i think. if someone changes their hair i have trouble recognizing them tbh

7. What’s your eye color? brown

8. Scary movies or happy endings? i was a really sensitive kid so i wasn't interested in watching scary movies for a while and i haven't really bothered to catch up and watch horror movies. honestly i don't watch as many movies as i'd like. there is so much media. i guess happy endings by default but i'm not opposed to darker stories, they all have their place

9. Any talents? i don't feel like i should be assessing this. i'm good at crossword puzzles? idk. i feel like everything i'm good at is stuff i practiced

10. Where were you born? in a hospital. i was told not to give revealing info to strangers on the internet

11. What are your hobbies? i never know how to answer this question on tumblr bc like. this is my hobby space. i write fanfic i read fanfic i make fanart i edit fanvids i make playlists. it's like asking your knitting club friend their hobbies. their hobby is knitting. you know this on account of being in knitting club

12. Do you have any pets? no :(

13. How tall are you? 5' 5", which is exactly average and not short even though my younger sister is taller than me

14. Favorite subject in school? shockingly (sarcasm) i liked english. but also science and history. basically anything but math and gym

15. Dream job? i'd love to be a professional critic but writing tv/music/film criticism isn't exactly steady work and i think having my livelihood depend on my hot takes would stress me out. i'll stick to posting them on tumblr.edu

not tagging anybody i hate tagging people for shit like this

#nina's personal log

[patrickjane]

#charlie dalton #dead poets society #dead poets society (1989) #dps #i did it my dudes #i made charlie dalton video this is how much i love him #i'm quite happy with this one tbh #anyway #we should all love charlie t.hanks #mine #fanvid

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I wish I could just like. not constantly second-guess everything I fucking do for once. what must go on in the heads of people without anxiety disorders I bet it’s nice

#currently trying to upload the fanvid but asking myself if it's good enough #and if i should even post it today or if i should do it some other day #i just wanna like curl up and cry somewhere tbh