#those two would SMACK each other for a corn chip | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

marvel-ousnesss · 4 years

Text

Little Flame (Hades x reader)

Request: Can I have an imagine where I'm Mal's best friend and I have a crush on Hades and he overhears?

A/N: Made with love, based on @thorxme18 ‘s request (I modified the concept a bit) 🥰 Sorry not sorry but… no smut in this one. Also, this ended up being super long, I think it's like 7k-ish ???? Anyways….. Enjoyyyy and tell me what you think.

Pairing: Hades x reader

Warning: Cursing

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Descendants or any of its characters.

Y/I: your initial

Much to your surprise, everything had changed from the last time some VKs were elected to go off-shore. Everyone who wasn't chosen seemed to be happy for those who were; you wished you'd've had that reaction from your mentor and, you'd dare to say friend, Hades. You couldn't bring yourself to stop thinking about it, it made both your mind and your left foot bounce non-stop as you waited for Mal and Ben to make an entrance at the new students' welcoming ceremony.

Ben thanked his people for their support, but not everyone seemed to be sharing the positive attitude on the VK topic. Beside you, you heard Audrey's grandma, whose name you couldn't remember, scoff, "not like we had a choice."

All you did was roll your eyes, after all your time in Auradon, you had grown used to the comments about you being a villain. You listened to Ben while fidgeting with the sleeve of your dress, a grin plastered across your face in expectancy of what was gonna happen after he finished singing. However, just like it happened with the announcement of new arrivals, not everyone was happy about the king's proposal.

"No!" Audrey screamed, making a few threatening glares, including yours, be thrown her way. As cliché as it may sound, it is right to say that, if looks could kill, Audrey would've been dead within seconds (if her jealousy didn't kill her first).

After Mal said yes, everyone began celebrating and commenting on how romantic the gesture had been, how good of a couple they made, and how lucky Auradon's people were to have them.

"Ben and Mal are the absolute best, I really cannot wait for Mal to be queen," said the girl who was standing next to you.

With a smile, you nodded in agreement, "I know, I mean, they work really well together, and they're such a great couple."

"You'd really rather have a VK on the throne than me?"

The girl just turned around and left, but you faked a smile and mocked, "I think even Carlos' dog would make a better queen."

"You're not one to talk, you're one of them yourself," Chad Charming came to Audrey's defense.

"Why thanks, captain obvious, I was completely unaware of that." You rolled your eyes at them as you began making your way to where your friends were standing.

As soon as Mal came down from the stage, you and Evie engulfed her in a tight hug.

"Did you guys know?"

Evie just sighed and grinned, "everything."

You shrugged nonchalantly, "helped plan it." You hugged her once more, thrilled to see her so happy, "you're gonna be the best queen that this pretty, preppy people can even imagine."

….

You stood next to Evie's desk, scanning a new book of sketches she had made for Mal's wedding dress and munching on a chocolate chip cookie.

"Who else knows about the crown and the scepter?" asked Evie, with her brows slightly frowned.

"No one. I mean, think about it, people are scared enough as it is. We have to employ these entirely new security measures". Mal spoke with confidence as she explained the situation to both of you.

For one, you couldn't believe that such important objects had been stolen, and you understood the fear of the people, knowing from first-hand experience how dangerous and wicked villains could be. However, you didn't support the Isle's complete isolation, it was unfair to take such measures.

"Will this delay our bringing over more V.K.'s?" Evie asked.

Mal sighed and replied, "We're talking about closing the barrier for good."

You gasped. "What? M, they can't do that."

Automatically, Evie's notebook rested on the table next to you and began pacing.

"Not only will you kill dozens of children's illusions to be here, but we'd never get to see the others again. You said no, right?"

"Y/N is right, you know? Besides, the four of us are living the dream, and we finally get to share that. I mean, what could be more important than that?" Evie had always been the most compassionate out of the five of you, so she was trying to lead Mal into the path that seemed the kindest.

"Yeah. I know. I mean, maybe security or maybe peace of mind for everyone in Auradon. People like Hades, dangerous and cruel, could get out of the Isle at any moment, I truly believe that it's best for us to keep the barrier closed. For the sake of our people".

"Our people? M, look, don't get me wrong; I really admire how you care about everyone's safety here at Auradon," you sat on a spare chair, between your two best friends, eyes pleadingly looking at Mal. "But you can't afford to forget where we all come from. Better than anyone, we know that not everyone there is a criminal; and, even some of those who are, want a chance to prove themselves. There must be something, anything that can be done."

Mal seemed a bit taken aback, both of you could see that she was having a hard time with the current situation so, even if you didn't completely agree with the measures that she was telling you about, you gave her your most sincere smile and all the support that you could muster.

"M, I'm so glad that you're going to be Queen. You will be a part of these conversations, you will stand up for the V.K.s. Thank you for telling us. You're gonna be a great Queen".

Mal seemed gave you a small closed-lip smile, you and Evie stood up and hugged her, and she sighed, calming down a bit.

…

You hummed to yourself as you helped Carlos prepare a picnic basket for Jane's birthday party. Chuckling, while Evie threw different fruits at Jay, you folded everyone's towels and neatly arranged them. When you were about to go upstairs, to get your camera, you heard a faint, "later, suckers!" coming from outside.

You all rushed out and, before you could see anything, Jay exclaimed, "Whoa! You might wanna think of a spell for that."

Turns out, Audrey, who apparently was out and about looking for trouble, not only stole the scepter and the crown, but had also turned Mal into an old lady. Your friends were debating over what to do concerning the Audrey issue, when you chimed in, "The only thing more powerful than the scepter is Hades' ember. We need to go get it."

Carlos countered, "Are you sure? I mean, Y/N, can't you fix it with your magic?"

"Sorry guys, but Hades's our only choice, we need to get the ember."

Jay scoffed, "Yeah, right. We can also invite him over for tea."

Carlos gave him a smack on the back of his head, but didn't support your suggestion either.

"He’s right, Y/I,” Evie spoke up, “ besides, no one knows where his lair is”.

You shared a look with Celia, then shrugged, “I do. Actually, we both do.”

“I'm his errand rat. I've got the key at my dad's.”

“Great, you’re both coming,” announced Mal.

To be honest, you missed the dusty air of the Isle; you'd never been a fan of the Olympus, so when the gods decided to kick you, the goddess of devilry in war, daughter of Ares, out of the place, you didn't even bother argue. You greeted Dr. Facilier, waltzed around his shop for a bit, and then exited with your friends.

"Long time nay see," beamed Harry with a wicked grin. The bikes that had brought you were now occupied by pirates of The Lost Revenge's Crew.

Jay was fuming and it showed, he snarled, "get off my bike, Hook.''

"Catch me if you can, Jay!"

And then, they were gone.

You made a move to follow them, as Jay, Carlos, and Evie already had, but Mal placed a hand on your shoulder. "They got this, the three of us gotta gotta go find the ember." So you made your way to Hades'.

With a sigh, you opened the door to one of the most familiar places in the whole Isle.

"Okay, stay quiet," Celia warned. " It echoes, like, crazy in here."

The three of you walked and you could see Mal's eyes bouncing all around the entrance of the 'New Underworld,' as you liked to call it jokingly. When Mal passed besides Severo' s cage, his three mouths snarled menacingly and he began barking; however, it stopped when you passed by and was replaced by happy panting. You looked at him but decided against greeting the three-headed dog, you'd have time for that later. Your best friend sent you a questioning look and you smiled at her, as if telling her "I'll explain later."

The only way of entering the lair was similar to the entrance of the mines in which dwarfs worked back at Charmington. Multiple rail bikes were stationed on the edge, together with some lantern helmets. Each of you took a helmet and got into a bike, which immediately began taking you to where your mentor and friend lived.

You glanced back at Celia and Mal as you explained, "okay, the plan's simple: you'll approach him and get the ember while Celia and I distract him".

"Okay," "alright then," they both agreed.

Given that the former god was fast asleep, you and Celia stayed at the entrance of the cave, while Mal followed your directions and approached him, to take the ember. You mentally cursed as Hades, still unmoving, inquired, "What are you two doing here?"

"We just thought we'd, uh, say hi," Celia tried. When Hades didn't respond, she continued, "also, we noticed that you're low on… on… canned corn."

Not knowing how to support her weak ass excuse, you limited yourself to greet him with a small wave, to which he responded with a smirk and a nod.

"Hi, Dad". Mal remained behind his couch, bending her knees to face him.

"Quite a show you put on the other day," he claimed.

"Right back at you".

After steering awake, he stood up, more like jumped to his feet, "I was just coming to see you!"

Mal didn't believe him, and didn't bother to pretend. "Really? Wonder why.Is it because I'm gonna be Queen?"

"Ah! Now, Mal, don't be bitter".

"You abandoned me when I was a baby," the fae's voice was full of anger and disgust.

The god rolled his eyes and defended himself, "no. no, I left your mother. She's not the easiest person to get along with".

"You think?"

You scoffed, making your way toward the small storage room where all your witchcraft and sorcery materials were sitting, unused ever since you moved to Auradon. While you gathered your possessions, you didn't pay much attention to their interaction, they deserved privacy.

From where you were, you could hear them sing and fight like they hadn't done in the last sixteen years or so.

"Do you wanna make up for being a lousy dad? - Give me the ember," you heard Mal demand.

Hades smirked, "the ember only works for me." And me, you recalled.

"No. It'll work for me. We're blood."

"You're only half Hades. The ember won't do everything for you that it does for me".

"I'll take my chances." Mal began to walk toward where you were, so you took it as a cue to grab your bag and make your exit.

"If it gets wet, it's game over."

When you left, Hades glanced at the cupboard where you kept some things, noticing that, now, the only thing left was a small piece of burnt paper with the words LONG LIVE THE UNDERWORLD messily scribbled on it. His thunderous laugh was faintly heard back on the surface. 'The place does have on hell of an echo'.

Your eyes seemed to be stuck on Mal as you walked back to the barrier; when she noticed you gave her a smile, but felt a kick in your stomach for not telling her which was your connection to him. You could have told her at the lair, but remained silent, thinking it was better to do so when the tension was less.

Everything was quicker than expected, you got in, got the ember after sort of an awkward greeting, and got out. The only problem that you had was the fact that Gil and Harry had now escaped, unleashing a chain of events that had resulted in the oddest of alliances. Long story short, Uma had been roaming the sea all this time, apparently looking for a hole in the barrier; and, while doing that, she had found all the luxury of life outside the dome of the Isle. So, now Mal had promised to guarantee a future for all VKs and you were working with the sea three.

After arriving at Auradon prep, Mal had lead you to the Castle. You looked for Ben with no success, ending up in a room full of knight armours which, speaking of odd, were now charmed to fight. Thanks Audrey. From there, things had gone messy and both gangs were now singing, dancing and fighting for their lives. You did what you could to cover Mal, who was battling two minion armours at once. You swinged your sword and struck the ones around you, with your eyes focused on the scene surrounding you; they were outnumbering you and your group was cornered into the center of the room. However, you couldn't help but notice that the sea witch had dropped the ember, which Audrey had noticed too.

When one of the knights went for the ember, you slashed his head off and went for it too, beating him to it. You concentrated, closing your eyes and clenching your fist around the ember. The familiar burst of blue sparks began to run through you and your eyes opened, glowing silver as you screamed and lifted your arm, making the knights stand completely still before dropping their swords and falling to pieces.

"Y/N?" Mal winded, her wide eyes calling on to an explanation.

You scratched your neck, trying to force your words out, "it's a long story, M."

She pressed on the topic, "Hades said his ember only worked for him, How..."

The others remained quiet, using the time to catch their breaths and recover from the recent encounter; however, Evie's and Carlos' faces mirrored Mal's.

Hesitantly, you revealed the truth. "You guys know I'm sort of a greek goddess myself?," they nodded.

"I am, or I used to be, the goddess of devilry in war, known for being reckless and destructive. This sparked Hades' interest, so he became my mentor and one of my closest friends. When my dad, Ares, found out, he asked Zeus for my permanent expulsion from the Olympus, so I moved in with Hades. Before everything with Hercules and Megara happened, I was already learning everything about the Underworld. Hades' grew to trust me enough to teach me the magic of death so, as it all happened, I learned to use the ember".

The others looked satisfied with your story, but Mal looked at you with an air of betrayal, "so, you've known him all this time," she concluded.

Again, you sighed, "that's right.'’

This time, it was Carlos who spoke, "why didn't you tell us?"

"I don't know, guess, the way I saw it, you guys would've treated me differently knowing that I'm immortal". Okay, that was only half of the truth, but you couldn't risk it in the middle of such an important mission.

Evie smiled at you and, while hugging you, she assured, "Y/N, We love you, no matter what."

Carlos, Jay, and even Mal were quick to join her, showering you with smiles and words of agreement.

"Uh, guys, sorry to interrupt but we gotta keep going," Gil said, making you end the hug and continue your search for the king.

….

On your way to Audrey's room, Mal approached you.

"So… you and my dad being friends, didn't see that one coming," she chuckled.

You shrugged, kicking the dust beneath you, "he was there for me in hard times, the guy has a better heart than what people give him credit for."

She nodded at your words, "How'd you guys meet?"

"We made quick friends in the Troyan war. I was summoned by the greek soldiers and he was there, personally gathering the souls of the fallen. He said my work was great and I complimented his fiery hair, which, as I came to learn, turns out is one of his softy points."

"The Troyan war? So that's why you didn't even open your greek history book," she concluded, lightening the mood.

Audrey was not in her dorm, but Uma found her diary, so you arrived to the conclusion that she was at Fairy Cottage, a place where she had spent a big part of her childhood. Nevertheless, you had all agreed to meet at Evie's after the two hours had passed, so you headed there instead.

When you made it, you saw the three new Vk's fast asleep on the living room, and Evie's boyfriend, Doug, in the same condition but in her study.

Evie fell to the floor beside him, desperately trying to wake him, but to no avail.

Uma rolled her eyes, "he's spelled, is she not a fast learner?"

"She's emotionally involved, okay?" Mal defended her.

"Well, in that case, she should be able to wake him up. True love's kiss".

The atmosphere in the room got thicker with Uma's suggestion, so Evie asked to be left alone with her sleeping boyfriend. After a song and a true love kiss, not to mention with Doug back on his feet, you decided to take a break and have a snack.

You smiled when Mal apologized to Uma, and placed a hand on hers to show your pride and support. However, happiness and peace of mind didn't last long. With loud thuds, wooden boards began to cover the windows and trapped you inside the house. Mal's eyes glowed green as she tried to break Audrey's jinx, but her magic wasn't powerful enough so she and Uma had to join forces. The boards fell down.

Evie hummed, "You did it! Together! This is what I've been talking about".

"I guess my shell likes you," Uma shrugged, wanting to appear nonchalant. "Why don't you hold on to that?"She handed the ember to Mal, but instead of keeping it, she smiled and handed it to you.

"Actually, I think Y/N should have it. She knows it better than I do," she confided.

You thanked your best friend and put the ember away, proceeding to look out the window.

You caught a breath but, before you said anything, Celia announced, "hey, it's your bae!"

That's all it took for all of you to rush outside, stopping on your tracks when you saw the guys on Evie's front yard. With a smile plastered on your face, you hugged Jay and Carlos, and smiled at the pirates and Ben (who was Busy greeting his queen-to-be).

"I'm so glad you guys are okay," you raved. "All of you," once again, your eyes fell on Gil and Harry.

After reuniting, you had to part ways once more; Jane, Gil, and Doug went to find Fairy godmother, and the rest went looking for Audrey to Fairy Cottage.

….

Frankly, it was quite predictable that Audrey would, yet again, outsmart you; so, when she wasnt in her hideout anymore, you weren't as surprised. To say that going there had been a loss of time would be inaccurate, given that you had witnessed a sort of amusing scene when Ben freed Chad.

You were walking together, abandoning Fairy cottage, when Ben demanded that, someday, he had to hear how Mal and Uma ended up working for a common cause. You shared a look with Evie, and she happily declared, "Actually, Mal promised to let all the kids off the Isle - once this is over".

"Mal?" The king inquired.

The fae sighed defeated, which you didn't understand.

"I have to tell you guys something. Um… I lied to you," she confessed. "No one will be coming off the Isle".

You couldn't help but get angry at her, how could she give you so much hope only to crash it? You knew that if you opened your mouth, you wouldn't be able to control your words so, with your eyes locked in the ground, you stood motionless.

She continued, "the program is shut down. And the barrier… will be closed for good. For Auradon's safety."

Uma spoke up, looking at Mal with a deadly glare. "Hold up. So we're saving your precious people and your behinds for a lie. I knew it was a mistake to trust you. You're always out for yourself".

Harry followed his captain's example, facing Ben.

"And you, King Benny..." he bowed, approaching your friend, "you're probably just gonna throw us all back inside".

It was not the badass pirates who raised their voices in that moment, it was the broken children who had discovered that they had been, in fact, fighting for a heartless lie this whole time.

"You know what? I actually thought you were brave. You're nothing but a chicken." Celia's voice broke when she spoke, sounding so betrayed that it wrecked you. "Too scared to tell me I was never gonna see my dad again".

You went after Celia, throwing the ember at mal with your back facing her. Unnoticed by you, the magical gem had landed on a tiny puddle on the forest floor; but that had been enough to extinguish its light.

"No! No," Mal exclaimed, tears beginning to flood her eyes.

"Regain your might and ignite! Regain your might and ignite!" Despite her desperate tries, the ember did not light back on.

The two pirates left to find their friend, showing no empathy at all and not bothering to look back.

At least now, Mal had the guts to face her friends and apologize. She directed her words at Evie and the others, but wished that you were there too, even if she didn't deserve it at that moment.

"Evie… I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, I just… I thought that... I was afraid to tell you. I thought I was gonna lose my best friend.I… I just lost Y/N! But I had to do something. I had to protect Auradon".

Evie brought herself to ask, "closing the barrier was your idea?"

Mal sobbed, defending herself, "I did it for us. I did it for our life that we have here now."

"For our life? What about the kids that we left behind on that island? The kids that we promised? We were their only hope. I thought you were gonna stand up for the V.K.'s. But instead, you lied to them. And you lied to Jay. And you lied to Carlos. And you lied to Y/N. And you lied to me. We're your family."

"I'm gonna go look for Y/N," whispered Jay, only for Carlos to hear.

When the younger boy nodded, the thief began to run in the direction in which you had previously left. After a few yards, he found you, throwing rocks into a small pond. He kneeled to sit next to you, but with a cloud of pink fog, he turned to rock. That's what let you know that Audrey was near, probably going after Mal, so you jumped to your feet and ran back to your friends. There they were, all of them turned to rock; but Mal was nowhere to be found.

Okay, think, think, she has to be somewhere near. Where would M go? She'd go find Audrey; now, where would Audrey go… The castle!

So, that's where you went and when you arrived, you saw your friend begging the pirate sea witch for her help. You were about to make your presence known, but you were snatched off your feet and hit with something on the back of your head.

You woke up on one of the towers next to Celia, who practically threw herself into your embrace.

"It's gonna be fine," you tried to reassure her.

"No, it's not," scoffed Audrey, grabbing Celia by her forearm and forcing her to stand up. "Now, scream for help," she ordered, "I need Mal up here so I can end her once and for all."

Celia complied. "Help me, Mal!" she screamed.

"Don't listen to her, Mal! Go find the others," you tried to warn her but Audrey put the scepter against Celia's neck; "say another word, and she's done with," she threatened.

"Save your little friend, Mal!"

"Help me, Mal!"

You cheered when you saw Mal approaching in her dragon form, but a glare from Audrey was enough to shut you up.

"Careful not to fry your little V.K. buddy!"

Audrey was distracted by Mal so you took the chance and jumped from the tower, landing on your feet. You ran to Uma and Harry, who were still there, watching the whole thing.

You dusted off your jacket and approached them, "are you guys okay?"

"Yeah, but she doesn't stand a chance without the ember," claimed Uma.

''We're stronger together. We're stronger together!" She tried to use her shell, but it was not working. "I'm right here, Mal! Regain your might and ignite. I'm right here, girl," the ember flickered lit but it didn't last long.

"Let me help, you placed your hand over Uma's, grabbing the shell with her. "We're right here. Regain your might and ignite!"

Your eyes gleamed silver and you beamed, "It worked!"

In that moment, Harry took you by surprise when he hugged you and Uma at the same time, not caring about 'sides'. You hugged the pirates back and grinned.

"Thanks Uma," you smiled, "and I'm sorry for everything".

Even if Mal had already apologized to Uma, you felt the need to do the same because, even if you did everything under your friend's lead, you had still been terrible with her.

"S'alright," she returned the smile, "and I'm glad we did this together."

…

For what seemed to be the thousandth time you closed your eyes and concentrated on the ember, but the result was not different from the previous attempts. You fell back into Ben's arms, panting.

"Sorry, guys, but I'm not powerful enough. The ember's laced to Hades' magic, not mine."

"There must be something that we can do, she's slipping away," Evie insisted.

"As Y/N said, there's only one person in the world who might be able to do something about this, and that's Hades," said Mal.

"Hades? He wouldn't do it. I wouldn't risk it,"Ben tried to reason.

"Actually, he might do it for me. He's my father," Mal revealed.

"I'll send guards to get him,"offered Ben.

"I can go get him," you volunteered, "I know where his lair is."

Ben looked at you questioningly; "he's, uh, an old friend of mine," you wrinkled your nose.

Uma entered the ro

\om, followed by Harry. "Maybe I can hitch a ride. The Isle is my home, someone needs to be there to protect it."

"Well, then, you will need your first mate". You smiled at them, already fond of the pirates.

"The Isle will be in very good hands."

The room fell silent, but Celia broke the ice, "Can I go, too?I wish I could be in both places," she gave Mal a sad smile.

So, it was settled. You were leaving the following day.

….

"I'll be back soon, stay here," you told the guards.

"Good luck, Y/N," Uma placed her hand on your shoulder and you smiled at her.

"Thanks, guys, for everything."

"Nay," shrugged Harry, "no big deal but, seriously, if ya ever visit, come to the ship."

With that, you parted ways. You knew how to get to Hades' by heart, from every part of the Isle; so it took you no time to reach the entrance of his lair.

You let out a breath and went in.

"Look who showed up after the curtain closed, heard you helped Mal beating the witch wannabe," he didn't even have to look your way to know who had traspassed his property; it was enough with the sound of your step.

"I… How did you even hear that?" You tried to avoid the elephant in the room.

Ignoring your question, he continued as he added what you noticed were the final ingredients to one of the potions that he sold at the market. "Congrats, really. Guess I taught you well. Now, let me guess, you came to say a final goodbye now that you're welcomed to join the goodie-two-shoes once again; it was fun having you, Y/N/N."

Now, you straight up scoffed at him, "dude, chill, don't get all cheesy and sad on me. I'm here because I need a favor; actually, Mal needs a favor."

He looked at you and you could see that he was angry, broken, and yet willing to help you out once again, "okay then, little flame, I'm listening.

You looked around the room, then looked at him, "It's Audrey, she's under the sleeping curse."

He crossed his arms over his chest and raised a brow, "so what, didn't you use the ember to wake her?"

"Couldn't do it," you admitted. "Guess I'm not as connected to it anymore."

He scoffed, glaring at you, "Who would've thought, it's been what, four years? Not that I'm keeping record."

Even if his tone was sharp and his eyes seemed hateful, you could read him like an open book; and, to say that it broke you to see him so hurt because of you was quite too little to express what you felt. "Hades, I… I'm sorry."

At this point, your eyes were boring into his pleadingly, but his pride didn't let him forgive you so easily.

"You're sorry?" he exclaimed. "Jeez, little flame, that's a relief! I'm glad a lowlife villain like myself is at least worthy of your apologies!"

For a moment, your sadness and regret were clouded by anger. You were forcing yourself to be brave enough to make amends and here he was, being a complete dick without even listening to you.

Stepping closer to him, with only a few inches between the two of you, you barked, "look, I'm actually trying here. So if you could shove your ego up your ass for a second and listen, that'd be fucking great!"

He smirked, closing the gap even more, "at least you haven't completely lost it yet."

When the steam of the moment dissolved into the air, you stepped back and sat down, using your hand for inviting him to do the same. "Now, the truth is, I did try to call; I tried to reach you the last time I was here, but I… I don't know. I was afraid of losing Mal to you. I was afraid of losing the world outside to you."

He remained silent so you continued, "When I was chosen to go to Auradon, I thought I had lost everything. Then I just met all of this great people and discovered that I'd… I..." you huffed. "Who am I trying to trick. The truth is I was awfully ungrateful with you, and a terrible friend and I'm really sorry."

He quirked a brow.

"Yes, I'm sorry, and as much as you'd like to hear more, that's all that I have to say."

"What were you saying about not getting all sad and cheesy? Oh, right, 'dude chill!' " He mocked you with a high pitched voice, making you smile.

"When do we leave?"

"As soon as possible."

….

When you got to Auradon, the guards told you that the king had sent specific instructions for Hades' stay. You were forced to head back to your place, and he was kept in a small version of the magic dome for the night. Next morning, when you were already back at Audrey's dorm, he was taken there by at least eight guards.

The former god entered the room, his limbs adorned with silver cuffs, and his face sporting a snarl of disgust to which you had become familiar with a long time ago.

Mal walked up to him, closely followed by you.

"Thank you," she said, "for coming."

"Didn't do it just for you," his eyes caught yours.

Ben and Mal shared a confused look, but the king broke it and asked, "can you wake her?'’

"Since when do heroes care about villains?" asked Hades, turning the cards around.

Ben trailed off, "she's..."

The god completed the young king's sentence, "one of your own. Right, When you guys try to destroy the world… it's an error in judgment. But when it's one of us… lock them up and throw away the key."

He scoffed, "right, Beast?"

After having a stare down with the former king, who had imprisoned the god and stripped him off his magic all those years ago, he raised his hands, but the guards restrained him immediately, going full defense.

"Yeah. I'm gonna need to use my hands," he declared.

He extended his hand, silently asking for the ember. Mal handed it to him and this time he was not restrained.

When he grabbed the gem that was rightfully his, his hair lit up.

He smirked, "haven't lost my touch."

The former lord of the dead stepped closer to the bed, he began the countercourse and the room was showered on a blue light, beaming with his power.

Audrey woke up, wishing for it all to be a nightmare. "I'm sorry. I wanted to hurt you both. I wanted to hurt all of you," she sighed.

Mal and Ben approached her bed. "I have owed you an apology for… a very long time now," said Mal, Ben agreed, "and so have I."

Then, Audrey's grandma, whose name you still couldn't recall, apologized to Mal. Just then, Beast motioned the guards to seize Hades, and to take him away once again. How classy, apparently a villain didn't even deserve a thank you.

After the guards exited the room, you followed them into the hallway.

"Wait! Guess I'll see you later," you smiled. "Say hi to Pain and Panic for me."

"They'll be thrilled to hear from you," he tried to smirk back, his expression just as sad as yours. "Thanks for a glimpse of the sun, by the way."

Without thinking twice, you walked up to him and pressed your lips to his, framing his left cheek with your right hand. The kiss wasn't as hungry as you would've expected it to be, but it was eager and full of feelings. It was the perfect way to say I'm gonna miss you.

No word was uttered afterwards. Your foreheads remained against each other for a few seconds, and his blue eyes looked at yours in a way in which they hadn't before, yet he didn't smile. You both stepped back, turned around, he slipped the ember into your hand, and then you left your separate ways. You smiled to yourself and held the familiar gem, feeling its power and warmth curse through you.

Days passed and you couldn't stop thinking about that kiss; you hadn't told anyone and it was eating you alive. So, now that you were at Evie's, wrapped around a blanked by the fire, watching a movie with your two best friends, you were gonna do it. You grabbed the remote and pressed pause, taking a breath and looking at them.

"Guys I need to tell you something. I'm sorry if it upsets you but it's been drowning me for some time now. I, I kissed Hades the day he came here to wake Audrey up."

Evie smiled at you but Mal was frozen in shock, her mouth was agape and her eyes were wide open. She tried to say something but words didn't come out.

You continued, fidgeting with your blanket, "M, I know that things have been quite tense between you but I couldn't lose him; I couldn't let him go back to the Isle without knowing how I felt and, believe me, I've tried to tell you guys before but I was also figuring this whole thing out."

Evie grabbed Mal's hand supportingly, then the fae took a breath and smiled at you. "Thanks for telling me this, Y/I.''

"You guys, you're my best friends. There's no one else I'd trust with this," you smiled at them, glad that they'd had taken it so well.

Mal sighed, "still, I can't reverse my decret to close the barrier Y/N. I'm sorry, you know that no matter what, I'll always be there for you; but I have a kingdom to think of and, even if Hades has helped us out and, even if he's your friend or… whatever he is," she chuckled, both of you joining for a second, "I can't overlook the crimes he's committed."

Your head and your heart were divided. You knew that Mal was speaking as a queen and not as a friend, and were utterly happy that she supported you, even with everything that was going on between her and Hades; but you couldn't stop yourself from being disappointed in the fact that she didn't even consider letting him out of the Isle.

Even so, you gave her a tender smile and hummed, "I know M, and I wouldn't think of asking you to do it for me. I just had to talk this out with you, it didn't feel right to keep it to myself."

"We're happy for you, Y/I," Evie smiled.

"Very," agreed Mal.

…..

Now, a few days later, you were happy again, as happy as you could be with everything that had happened. Standing between Evie and Carlos, you clapped as Ben and Mal appeared on the balcony.

"Lady Mal and I wanna thank you for celebrating our engagement with us today. I couldn't be prouder or happier to call you my Queen." Ben looked at Mal lovingly, and to be honest you felt only a bit jealous of their happiness; but they both deserved it, after going through so much. "So… raise your glasses to our future Queen of Auradon."

"To our Queen of Auradon!”

"To our Queen of Auradon!" you cheered.

"Speech, Your Special-ness," mocked Carlos.

Jay followed, "speech, Your Fancy One."

"Speech, your oh-so-royalness," you winked at her.

She chuckled and smiled apologetically, then she fell serious and the crowd became silent.

She turned toward Ben, "I can't. I can't be Queen of Auradon. I can't turn my back on the Isle."

After you looked at her, nodding in encouragement, she began talking to the people. 'We made a decision… to close the barrier forever; and it was my idea, but it's wrong. I've learned that you can't live in fear because it doesn't actually protect you from anything. You never know where the bad is gonna come from. And you never know where the heroes are gonna come from either."

Carlos grabbed your hand, in assurance.

Mal continued, "Without Uma and her pirates, Auradon would be gone. And without Hades, my father, Audrey would be gone. We are all capable of good and bad, no matter which side of the barrier we come from. And that's why I can't be Queen of just Auradon. I have to be Queen of the Isle, too. And it's time that we take the barrier down forever."

Ben placed a hand on her back, and spoke in her support. "I choose to be a King who moves forward. It's time for forgiveness. It's time for new beginnings. The barrier will come down!"

"Yes!" "Woo!" you and Carlos cheered.

"Bring it down, Mal," and so, the five of you did it together.

After everyone on both sides had processed what had just happened, a sea of villains and vks flooded the bridge and came to Auradon; your eyes surfed the crowd, looking for the face you wanted to see, but he was nowhere in sight. Some of the Auradon kids made their way to the gates, to welcome the newcomers, so you joined your friends at the very front of the bunch.

Everyone was dancing and singing and celebrating, so you let the vibes absorb you. You danced and cheered with the rest, but when the party mood dimmed out a bit, you finally saw the spikes of blue hair that you were looking for moments before. However, you didn't approach Hades, you went straight to Mal.

"He came," you said, anxiety dripping from you.

She smiled at you reassuringly and advised, "Get out there and tell him how you feel; he's a complete idiot not to feel the same."

"M, I can't," you insisted, "what if he doesn't?"

She smirked at you, "as I said, only a complete idiot wouldn't like you back."

You let out a breath, shook your fear out, and looked around to see where he was. Much to your despair, or your relief, he had been standing behind a group of people nearby.

"So, how exactly do you feel?" he smirked. "I think it wasn't clear enough the other day."

"Look, I've liked you for quite sometime now," you confessed. "Maybe a few decades. The kiss the other day, it was just me spilling it all; you don't have to like me back, but I just had to tell you."

" 'Dude, chill! Don't get all cheesy on me'," again, there was his cheap impression of you.

This time, you couldn't help but laugh and roll your eyes at him and, before you could say anything, his hands flew to your waist and his lips were on yours once again. This time, both of you were absorbed by the moment and let the kiss be everything that the first one had not been. He bit your lower lip and granted himself entrance to your mouth, which you accepted happily. You separated to catch your breath and smiled. He looked at you like he had before and avowed, "Nah, I think I don't like you that much, little flame."

Once again, you laughed and punched him playfully, "shut up, really."

"Or what?" he challenged, making you blush.

You recovered quickly, and whispered into his ear, "I guess you'll find out later, maybe at my place."

"Welcome to Auradon, by the way." You kissed his cheek, grabbing his hand and leading him to where Mal and the others were.

#hades x reader #hades imagine #hades onshot #descendants x reader #descendants imagine #discendants oneshot #disney descendants #Mal #mal imagine #evie #carlos de vil #jay #gil #harry #uma #audrey #chad charming #descendants 3

690 notes · View notes

robinskey · 5 years

Text

Lover (Steve Harrington x Reader)

A/N: GUYS as you’ve probably noticed, I’m incredibly excited about the release of @taylorswift‘s new album. IMO, Lover is one of Taylor’s best songs to-date, and I thought it would fit perfectly with a fluffy, domestic Steve one-shot.

Warnings: Mild language, heavy fluff. Story under the cut.

We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January

This is our place, we make the rules

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you, dear

Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?

It wasn’t until you and Steve moved into your first home together that you realized how deeply in love he was with holiday decorations.

You had started the process of moving your belongings into the new place at the end of September. By mid-October, Steve had begun pestering you about shopping for Christmas decorations. You reminded him that you hadn’t even unpacked the last box yet, and Halloween hadn’t even occurred yet. Steve was persistent that you needed to get the lights up as soon as possible to “maximize the Christmas spirit.”

After a lot of convincing, Steve had finally agreed to wait until November. By then, you figured, he’d forget about it. I mean, this was the guy who couldn’t remember his social security number and occasionally wrote it on his stomach (“because I’m not dumb enough to keep it on, like, my hand, Y/N, where everyone can see it.” When when you suggested he just carry his social security card with him, he told you he didn’t trust himself not to lose it.) Surely, that guy would forget all about it, right?

Wrong. On November 1st, you were nursing a Halloween-candy hangover when Steve dragged you to Goodwill. You returned home with enough decorations to light up a mansion and spent the rest of the afternoon stringing them all around your tiny one-bedroom house. After dinner, you and Steve headed outside. As the sky faded to black, Steve wrapped an arm around your shoulders, and he watched in wonder as your small townhouse transformed into a winter wonderland.

“Look at that, Y/N! We did that,” he said. The various colors of the lights reflected in his eyes as he gazed down at you.

“I didn’t know King Steve Harrington could get so excited over Christmas lights.” Your smooth teasing was foiled by a strong gust of wind that left goosebumps on your arms and caused you to shudder.

“I’m full of surprises,” Steve said as the two of you started back towards the front door. “For example, you probably didn’t know, but I can make the best cup of hot chocolate in the state of Indiana.”

“Oh, really?”

“Oh, yeah. Grandma Harrington taught me her secret recipe.”

Even though you’d known Steve for years, you learned new things about him every day. You wondered if you’d ever run out of things to learn about the boy you’d known all your life.

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take me home

You're my, my, my, my lover

We could let our friends crash in the living room

This is our place, we make the call

And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all

Dustin Henderson started referring to your place as “our house” before you guys even moved in. He dropped by several times a week with updates on the newest happenings at Hawkins Middle or questions about how to handle a Suzie situation. At least once a month, Dustin crashed on your couch after a weekend movie night.

On one occasion, you and Steve returned home from a date night to discover half a dozen adolescents gathered around the television in your living room. A curly-haired kid carried around a bag of chips in one hand and waved cheerfully with the other. He flashed his infamous toothy grin, which you met with a half-scowl, half-squint of confusion.

“Dustin? How did you get in here?”

Dustin spoke through a mouthful of Doritos. “My mom dropped us off. And then I used my key.”

Your glare switched targets. This time, you directed it at Steve. He clamped his hand down on his face; you weren’t sure if it was to avoid your gaze or express his frustration.

“Dude, I gave you that key for emergencies only.”

“This was an emergency!” Dustin threw up his hands, sending an army of cheesy corn chips into the atmosphere. After falling back to earth, bright orange triangles wedged themselves into your new white rug. “The season premiere of our favorite show is tonight, and we didn’t have anywhere to watch it.”

You crossed your arms over your chest. Your eyes scanned over the gang sprawled across your couch, armchairs, and carpet. Judging by the boxes of candy and cans of soda littered across the floor, Dustin must have raided your pantry. Apparently, the kitchen wasn’t the only place he infiltrated, since almost your entire linen closet was spread out over the living room. Lucas and Max shared the recliner beside which Dustin was currently standing. Will sat on a pillow with his back against the coffee table, his attention still focused on the television screen. You turned your attention to Mike, who was curled up next to El under a crocheted blanket you’d received from your grandmother.

“Doesn’t your family have a TV, Mike?”

"Yeah, we do, but my mom kicked us out so she could watch a soap opera or some shit. She and Nancy love that crap.”

Nancy.

That name ignited the flame of jealousy in your chest. You knew it was totally irrational; she and Steve hadn’t dated since high school. They’d both moved on-something Nancy did almost instantaneously. Steve had told you the whole saga of their mostly-one-sided relationship, and you were fairly certain Nancy never really loved him.

Still, Nancy was Steve’s first serious girlfriend. She was the first girl-the only girl, other than you-to whom he’d said “I love you” and meant it. Nancy was, and would always be, Steve’s first love. There wasn’t anything you could do to change that.

“Y/N? Hey, babe, you good?”

Steve’s voice jolted you back to reality. You shook your head slightly to clear it, then nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

You pretended not to notice the way his mouth twitched downward slightly in concern.

“Great. So we can stay?” Dustin interrupted. The hopeful gleam in his eyes was too much to resist.

“I guess,” you sighed, earning a chorus of triumphant “yeah!”s from the kids. “Your show’s probably about over by now, anyway, isn’t it?”

Dustin furrowed his thick brows, as though that was the most blatantly incorrect assumption you could have made. Lucas let you know that “it doesn’t even start for three more hours.”

“Won’t that be, like, midnight? Your parents aren’t going to freak out if you come home at two in the morning?” Steve asked.

“Actually...” Dustin drew out the word until he finally ran out of air. Then, he spoke the next few words in one breath. “We were hoping you’d let us spend the night here?”

You and Steve exchanged glances. Between your schoolwork and Steve’s work schedule, the two of you hadn’t been able to spend as much quality time together. You’d finally both managed to secure a responsibility-free night and a cheesy rom-com to watch while cuddling on the couch. (Steve pretended to hate those movies, but he almost always teared up at least once during the show.)

None of that mattered now, though, because your boyfriend could never say no to his favorite child-or so you thought.

Steve scratched the back of his neck. He glanced at you out of the corner of his eye before saying, “Actually, Dustin, tonight’s not the best night for a sleepover. Y/N and I kind of had plans.”

Lucas raised his eyebrows suggestively. “Plans, huh? What kind of plans?” he said, earning a smack on the arm from his girlfriend.

Color rose to your cheeks; Steve picked up a pillow someone had haphazardly tossed on the floor and launched it at Lucas’s head. Instead of hitting its intended target, though, the cushion collided with Max’s face. Ever the hothead, the ginger quickly contorted her neutral expression into a deep frown. She chucked the pillow back toward Steve with tremendous force, along with a few other throw pillows. Only one actually hit Steve. The rest rained down on you.

And, as a mature, homeowning adult battling literal children, you knew there was only one correct response: to hurl each and every one of those pillows right back.

It didn’t take long before the scene devolved into utter chaos. Fluffy rectangles flew across the living room, smacking into bodies or simply into walls. The kids outnumbered you and Steve three-to-one, so you were doomed from the start. However valiant of an effort you two gave, the party still overcame you, burying you and Steve under an avalanche of pillows.

“Clearly, we won this fight,” Dustin said as he loomed over you. Steve had tried to act as your human shield, so he laid beside you on the floor. “I think that means we earned the right to stay.”

“Dustin-“

“No, Steve, it’s okay,” you said, turning towards him. “I know it’s not what we originally planned, but maybe a sleepover with the kids would be fun.”

Steve looked at you with admiration glittering in his chocolate eyes. “Yeah?” he asked softly.

“Yeah.” You shifted a few pillows to get closer to Steve and plant a gentle kiss on his mouth. He smiled as your lips brushed his, and for a moment, you forgot about the gang of gangly tweens in your living room.

Then, a symphony of “ew”s and “aw”s and “can you not”s and “I think it’s sweet”s erupted throughout the room.

Steve shot into an upright position, pointing his finger in the general direction of the sitting area. “Hey, this is my house, and my girlfriend, and if I want to kiss her, I will. And if you dweebs want to stay here to watch your stupid show, you’ll keep your mouths shut.”

“As long as you keep yours shut,” Dustin quipped. “I think I can speak for everyone when I say we’d rather not see you and Y/N sticking your tongues down each other’s throats.”

You tossed the last pillow throw of the night at Dustin but agreed. You and Steve kept the PDA to a minimum that night. They were just kids, after all, and you didn’t want to corrupt them. However, when Nancy came to pick up Mike the next morning and Steve waved to her from the porch, you didn’t hesitate to flounce out the front door in your robe and draw Steve into a passionate kiss.

You just had to make sure Nancy knew what was yours.

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take me home

You're my, my, my, my lover

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?

With every guitar string scar on my hand

I take this magnetic force-of-a-man to be my lover

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

All's well that ends well to end up with you

Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover

And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me

And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover

Your favorite part of the day was coming home to your best friend.

Steve more or less memorized your schedule. You arrived home around the same time every evening, so Steve knew when to start listening for the sound of gravel crunching under the wheels of your car. He would then meet you on the porch with a “hello” kiss and a “how was your day, honey?” You always feigned indignance as he took your bags, murmuring something about how weak he must think you are to not be able to carry them two more steps. But, secretly, you spent your entire commute home anticipating the interaction.

This was especially true on the stressful days, the ones you felt would never end. Even though Steve was completely clueless in most situations, he could typically tell when you were in a foul mood. Those were the times he pulled you a little closer to his heart, hugged you a little tighter, loved you a little extra-just in case you needed it.

Today, you really, really did. It had been one of those days where everything seems to go wrong. You couldn’t wait to crawl into bed with Steve and snuggle all your sorrows away.

As you pulled into the driveway, your heart beat faster in anticipation. You watched the front door swing open. It took you a second to realize that the figure standing on the porch wasn’t your boyfriend. Rather, it was a short, stocky kid with a halo of golden curls. If it hadn’t been for the unmistakable hair, you might not have recognized him; you’d never seen him sans ballcap but plus a paisley-print bowtie around his neck and certainly never with dish rag was draped over his arm.

“Hey, Dustin,” you said. When he responded by simply smiling back at you, you asked, “What...what’cha doing here, kid?”

“Hello, Ms. Y/L/N. I’ll be your server for the evening,” he responded without missing a beat.

“My server?”

Dustin bent his head slightly in what he must have considered a sophisticated spin on a nod. “Indeed. Now, if you’ll follow me, ma’am...”

You kicked off your shoes and set down your purse before wandering after your guide down the dimly-lit hall. Something crinkled under your footsteps. You quickly noticed small ovals scattered across the wood floor. As you stepped on one, it felt like silk against your bare feet.

Petals?

You were too busy staring at the flowers scattered across the hall to realize you’d reached your destination. Dustin stopped, and you ran right into his back. You stumbled before regaining your balance and taking a look around the room.

The “server” had escorted you to your own kitchen-a place you were quite familiar with, since Steve couldn’t cook a decent meal to save his life. (To be fair, though, you weren’t much more skilled with the stove, so approximately 90% of your diet was comprised of takeout and peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches.) However, you’d never seen the kitchen quite like this.

It was the cleanest it had been since move-in day. Not a dish sat on the counter or even in the sink. The crumbs typically scattered across the floor had been replaced by rose petals. Sparkling white Christmas lights stretched across the room, and Elvis Presley crooned over the record player in the corner of the room. You didn’t even know Steve owned a record player. (As you later discovered, he didn’t. He’d borrowed it from Jonathan Byers.)

In the center of the room, your cheap card table was draped with a lace tablecloth. Wedged between two covered silver platters that looked like they belonged in a castle, a flickering candle cast shadows on the face of the boy sitting beside it. As soon as his eyes fell on you, he scrambled to his feet and over to you.

“Hi,” Steve said, winding his arms around your waist. He sounded breathless, even though he’d literally just walked a few feet.

“Hey.” Your eyes flicked from his slicked-back hair and freshly-shaven face to his crisp button-up and newly-polished shoes. “What’s-um-what’s all this?” you asked, vaguely gesturing around the room.

“Oh, you know.” Steve pressed a quick kiss to your lips before taking your hand and leading you to the table. “I just thought I’d do something special for you tonight.”

"That’s...really sweet.”

Steve scooted your chair in before placing himself back into the seat across from you. Dustin disappeared into your pantry, then returned with a bottle of sparkling grape juice. As you watched the teenager carefully pour a splash into each of your glasses, you asked whether Steve had bribed or tricked him into spending his Friday night playing restaurant.

“This is my full-time job, ma’am. This is how I earn my living,” Dustin answered dutifully before breaking character. “Besides, four of my stupid friends are on a double-date, and Will’s sick, so I had nothing better to do.”

“Way to sell us on the idea that you want to be here, dipshit,” Steve remarked.

“Hey, show our waiter a little respect!” you teased, gently kicking Steve under the table.

“Thank you, Y/N. But, actually, I prefer the term server,” Dustin corrected. He proceeded to produce a notepad from his pocket and read you the specials-or, rather, special, considering there was only one: spaghetti with meatballs. “On our regular menu, we also offer a wonderful noodle dish with a marinara sauce for the same low price as the special-zero dollars.”

You quirked an eyebrow. “So...just spaghetti again?”

Dustin clapped a hand over his heart in mock offense. “Excuse you, madam. It’s spaghetti without meatballs, which is a completely different experience.” Dustin glanced around as though someone might overhear before quietly adding, “Personally, I would recommend the spaghetti with meatballs, unless you want grubby hands digging around in your dish to pull out the meatballs, which may or may not already be incorporated into the pasta.”

You rolled your eyes but laughed nonetheless. “I guess I’ll have the spaghetti with meatballs, then.”

“Excellent choice. And for you, sir?”

“I’ll have the same,” said Steve.

“Well, you’ve both made this very easy for me. Pardon my reach,” Dustin said, leaning over to pluck the covers off the platters. A heaping hill of noodles, red sauce, and meatballs lay underneath.

Dustin took the lids and disappeared into the living room. You weren’t sure if Dustin was just trying to stay out of the way or if he was going to attempt to wash them in the bathroom sink. It definitely wouldn’t have been the weirdest thing he’d done in your house; once, you and Steve caught him trying to explain morse code to a squirrel in your backyard. That kid was truly an odd duck.

And speaking of weird behavior, you were still seriously questioning what was happening. Steve was a sweetheart, and he did everything in his power to make you happy. This definitely wasn’t the first time he’d surprised you with a thoughtful gesture, but it was probably the most all-out he’d ever gone. The last time he even attempted to cook for you was during senior year of high school, when you first started dating. As an after-school snack, Steve had popped some pizza rolls in the microwave and promptly forgotten about them...until, of course, the kitchen appliance burst into flames.

As strange as it was, you didn’t want to ruin the moment by verbally expressing your curiosities. You simply swirled slightly-soggy spaghetti around your spoon and savored the small talk. Eventually, Dustin reappeared to clear your plates and ask if you wanted dessert.

“What are my options?”

Dustin’s excellent waiter facade faded for a second. He glanced at Steve with wide eyes. His gaze begged for guidance-which Steve failed to provide. He simply squinted at Dustin as if to say, Figure it out for yourself.

The entire ordeal lasted about fifteen seconds. It was too long for Dustin to turn back to you with a tight-lipped smile plastered on his face as though nothing had just happened between them.

“The final course is-the dessert, uh-it’s a surprise.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you could have sworn you saw Steve offer a nod of approval.

“Okay...” You drew out the word as your mind jumped to every conclusion possible. “Is it a good surprise? Or is it, like, a somewhat-edible science experiment that might actually poison me?”

“Oh, no, no. It’s a good surprise. You’ll like it. I promise,” Dustin said. “I-uh-I’ll go get it,” he said, then disappeared once more.

“Steve, why did Dustin just head toward the bathroom? I swear, if he made Jell-O in the toilet or something, I’m going to lose it.”

Steve just shrugged. He avoided your gaze, and a few beads of sweat had broken out across his forehead. That pretty much solidified your suspicions that Steve and Dustin were pulling some weird sort of prank on you.

Dustin returned a few minutes later with yet another silver platter. (Seriously, where was he getting these things?) This time, though, there weren’t any noodles on the plate he unveiled. Instead, a small velvet box sat on the metal.

The next few seconds happened in a blur. You recalled Steve rising from his chair and reaching for the box. Then, suddenly, he was on one knee in front of you. The box opened like an oyster. Instead of a pearl, though, its treasure was a glimmering diamond ring.

Tears began clouding your vision before Steve’s lips even parted. As soon as he spotted the water in your eyes, Steve started to get choked up, too. He tried to power through, but his voice became more strained with each syllable.

“Y/N. These past few years with you have been the best of my life, and I never thought...shit." Steve blinked rapidly, attempting to clear away the tears. “I never want to spend my time with-with anyone else-damn it,” he murmured as a drop of water finally escaped his tear duct and rolled down his face. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I had this whole speech prepared, but now I’m a mess-”

You stopped his ranting by placing a gentle palm on his cheek and a kiss on his forehead. “It’s okay, sweetheart. I love you for the whole-ass mess you are.”

Steve leaned into your touch for a moment and whispered, “I love you, too, Y/N.” Then, he straightened up, cleared his throat, and softly asked, “Will you marry me?”

“Of course.”

Steve barely had the patience to slide the ring on your finger with his shaking hands before he picking you up and swinging you around. He kissed all over your face, and your happy tears mixed with his in a joyous saltwater solution.

The kiss fest didn’t end until Steve, caught up in all the excitement, accidentally pressed his lips to your nostrils. The two of you burst into a fit of giggles amplified by the ecstasy of the emotions you were feeling. Your hysteria lasted for several minutes and ended with you and Steve laying on the floor, lungs devoid of oxygen and limbs tangled together.

“Are you guys really that happy, or are you, like, on something?”

You both glanced toward Dustin, whose presence had completely slipped your mind. Luckily, Steve had a response ready. It was cheesy and cliche, but nothing could have fit the situation more perfectly:

“No, dude. We’re just high on life.”

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take me home (Forever and ever)

You're my, my, my, my

Oh, you're my, my, my, my

Darling, you're my, my, my, my lover

***

Taglist: @novaddictx @anabundance0ffand0ms @rexorangecouny @broadwayandnetflix @explode-a-pult @whormotional @loulouloueh @readinthegarden12 @lacunaclouds

If you want to be added to the tag list for a specific character/my writing in general, leave a reply or send me a message! Thanks again for reading. <3

If you want to check out more of my writing, here’s my masterlist. :)

199 notes · View notes

ladyluck852 · 5 years

Text

Winner Winner (Hanbin x Reader)

A/N: chicken dinner. Here I go, finally writing a fic about my ultimate bias, pls enjoy I thought this was v cute. Also, the fun cousin stuff is v accurate if your cousin is like your sibling, I have one of those and I would sell him for a corn chip...

Word Count: 3.5k

Genre: fluff, meeting the parents lol

Warnings: I put on my big girl pants so there’s the usual, cussing with the addition of some suggestive content :)

Summary: Meeting his chronically nervous girlfriends parents for the first time should scare Hanbin, but it scares his girlfriend more.

“You’re more nervous than I am. God dammit I know I should have made a move before we left the house, I think I have a bottle of tequila in my car” Hanbin fussed, not being able to watch his fidgeting girlfriend stress out without stressing himself out. He was meeting her parents for the first time, introductions long overdue by about a year and a half just because y/n could not comprehend having her parents and Hanbin in the same room. Hanbin was ready, he’d been ready like three months into the relationship, but y/n kept putting it off until her own mother yelled at her. Of course everyone thought it was hilarious, especially her cousin...

Hanbin and y/n met when Bobby decided to bring his cousin around, they were like two peas in a pod and he just wanted her to meet his best friends. Bad idea, Hanbin swept her off her feet and now Bobby was just slightly uncomfortable. Being as close as he was to the both of them, he really didn’t want to know about their personal life whatsoever, Hanbin was strictly forbidden from talking about y/n whenever he was around because he had a habit of oversharing.

“Babe, I want to leave. I don’t wanna be here” she whispered, burying her face in his chest as he tried to cover her with his jacket. He rubbed her back, her arms, played with her hair, anything to calm her down. She was always nervous and the only time she wasn’t nervous was when she was bossing him around or with Bobby, the fact that it took this long for him to meet her parents just made it worse for her.

“We’re already here. Come on, I’ll give you a massage when we get home” Hanbin said excitedly, wincing when she smacked his arm.

“A massage? You know I hate massages, is that a code word for you getting some? You’re terrible Hanbin, please don’t even mention anything like that in front of my parents” y/n groaned, ringing the doorbell as Hanbin smirked. He knew her, he knew if he acted stupid she’d go into mom mode and boss him around, get a bit of confidence. She was so cute.

“What? You don’t want you parents to know their 23 year old daughter has a private life with her boyfriend? So I shouldn’t mention that you drink either right? Or that you let me-“

“Oh, it’s you two...” Bobby muttered, grabbing y/n by her jacket and trapping her under his arm as he dragged her into the house. Y/n was whining and hitting him but to no avail, the cousin/sibling dynamic was something Hanbin would not get involved in. He just shut the door and removed his shoes, hearing yelling coming from Bobby’s mom to let the poor girl go and his poor girlfriend coughing up her lungs.

“Where’s my son in law? Gosh you’re all red what happened?” Hanbin heard a voice say, his eyes wandering all over the house as he crept through the hallway, making his way towards the kitchen, but not before taking photos of the pictures her parents had up on the wall. Lots of hilarious photos of a young Bobby and y/n in hilarious poses, bad haircuts, missing teeth. Adorable.

“Your nephew tried to choke me to death. Why is he even here? He’s so chaotic mom, why do you guys love him?” Y/n groaned, seeing Hanbin creep into the kitchen with a nervous look on his face. Everyone noticed him in an instant, he’d never felt so weird in his entire life and it was just y/n’s moms intense stare. He wasn’t sure what she was thinking, but suddenly she smiled and pulled him into a hug.

“Oh you’re so handsome! Wow y/n, your kids will be gorgeous”

“Mom!!!”

Y/n was back to being a nervous wreck, her hands fiddling with her shirt until it was wrinkled and Bobby lent her his sweater, but not before making jokes about her nervousness. His theory was that she was probably pregnant and that’s why she couldn’t deal with the pressure, this had resulted in her chasing him around the entire house and upstairs.

Hanbin was a good boy, sitting at the dinner table waiting for his girlfriend and best friend to settle down, trying to ignore the loud thud he heard from the stairs but silently hoping it wasn’t y/n.

“Jiwon! You idiot, my ass hurts!” Y/n was whining, Hanbin peered around the corner to see both y/n and Bobby sitting on the stairs. Well it looked like they had both fallen, probably wrestling or hitting each other like idiots, y/n was hitting Bobby and that’s when Hanbin decided to stop being nosy.

“Can you two stop acting like children, your father is going to be angry if you break something” y/n’s mom hissed, sending the children to the table. Before y/n could sit next to Hanbin, Bobby occupied the space and gave her a smug look, winning one last time as she went to sit across from them.

“Father? Your dad is here?” Hanbin asked, nervous for real this time.

“Yes, yes I am. Nice to meet you, you’re the boyfriend?” Y/n’s dad said, coming into the room as Hanbin immediately got up from his chair. Bobby and y/n laughed at him, watching his interaction when he went into proper formal mode, finally seeing eye to eye when it came to making fun of her boyfriend.

“Honey you’re so sweet, y/n hates it when I cut up her meat for her” y/n’s mom cooed halfway through dinner, Hanbin had jumped out of his seat to serve his girlfriend and everyone had watched when y/n turned bright red.

“That’s because she loves-“

“Shut up Jiwon” y/n hissed, stopping her cousin before he could make a filthy joke at the table. She was finally beginning to relax, all without the aid of alcohol or five minutes alone with Hanbin, the evening was going by so well that her hands didn’t even shake when Hanbin kissed her cheek when he was done serving her.

“Before I hear about you from you, I want to hear what my daughter likes about you. Clearly you and Jiwon are good friends, but if you’re anything like him and you’re dating my daughter I’m going to be disappointed. So y/n what do you see in Hanbin exactly?” Her father asked, skeptical of the first boyfriend his daughter had brought home to meet the family. He’d been waiting for this day, and he didn’t expect to like her boyfriend but he didn’t think anything bad of Hanbin yet.

“M-me? What I like about him?” Y/n asked nervously, Hanbin watched her hands clutch her napkin and her eyes widen and he tried not to sigh out loud. Nervous y/n was not a friend to either of them, “well he’s really nice...”

“I’m sure he is” her mom said from across the table, her spot next to Bobby’s mother certified a good view of her nervous wreck of a daughter.

“He’s really helpful and smart, um...he’s a good eater,” y/n mumbled, watching Hanbin grimace slightly before Bobby started to choke. No one really caught on, Bobby was the only one who found it funny and in turn he’d begun to choke on his food like an idiot, “he likes it when I cook, oh my gosh you’re so annoying!”

“In conclusion, he really loves her whatever, Hanbin talk about yourself” Bobby muttered, wiping tears from his eyes as his cousin glared at him from across the table. Y/n had been plotting to get rid of him ever since his first comment of the night, now even more so, if she remembered correctly Bobby was dating someone and no one knew.

“Talk about myself? Or how much I love y/n? I guess I can do both, I don’t think I am a particularly good boyfriend,” Hanbin laughed, honestly speaking but making y/n stare at her plate to avoid everyone’s eyes suddenly on her, “but y/n makes me a good boyfriend. My life is chaotic, I’m always busy, I get frustrated and angry all of the time but it seems like y/n never falters no matter what. So in turn, because she’s so supportive, I’m always trying my hardest to be the type of man she feels comfortable and safe with. Even if she is crazy I’m-“

“Don’t say it” Bobby whispered under his breath, kicking Hanbin in the leg before the both of them turned to stare at each other.

“I’m crazy for her. I love her, so I hope you guys think I’m a proper fit for her, I can’t imagine a day without her” Hanbin finished, smiling cutely at y/n who was swallowing a whole cup of water.

“This chicken is really spicy” y/n said, her whole face red as she stood from the table and disappeared from sight.

“Is anyone else touched or is it just me? Hanbin I think you should go handle your woman before she uses up all the tissues while crying her eyes out” y/n’s dad said, giving Hanbin a thumbs up. It was mostly an excuse to talk about him while he was away, but Hanbin didn’t catch on as he went searching for her. He heard crying when he passed the staircase, pulling open the closet underneath the stairs and watching y/n as she stood there sobbing between the coats.

“Harry Potter are you okay?” Hanbin chuckled, closing the door behind him as he squeezed himself into the closet with her.

“You’re so sweet, my mom adores you, I’m just freaking out right now okay?” Y/n cried, not budging when Hanbin tried to hug her.

“What’s wrong my love? Why are you crying so much? You didn’t even cry this much the first time I told you I loved you” Hanbin joked, not getting a reaction out of y/n who just buried her face in his chest.

“You’re so special Hanbin, so the thought of losing you terrifies me. And I knew my parents would love you, that’s why it took me so long, I don’t want to lose you” she confessed, not seeing Hanbin’s reaction since it was so dark and her face was plastered against his chest.

“Ah, baby, sweetheart, my love, don’t be stupid. You’re the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me, what makes you think I’d ever let you go? Do I need to kiss you to make it better?” Hanbin whispered against her ear, notoriously warm hands creeping up her shirt until she jumped.

“I’m going to choke you in this closet Hanbin” she grumbled, trying to remember where she saw the pair of random shoelaces.

“And?” Hanbin snorted, finding her mouth in the dark and covering it it with his, the both of them leaning against the wall of the small closet as he slipped his hands underneath her shirt. And Bobby’s sweatshirt.

“You can’t seduce me. They’re waiting for us” y/n whined, Hanbin ignored her as her hands said otherwise, tugging at his hair while he kissed down her jaw.

“Your parents think you’re crying your eyes out, plus I think they’re talking about me so they definitely want us there. What would you do if I-“

“Are you two DONE?!”

Y/n had never moved so fast in her life, tripping over her feet to separate herself from Hanbin as the door opened and Bobby turned on the light. Hanbin pulled y/n in front of him, giving a nervous smile as he fixed her hair and clothes.

“Shut up, she was so sad and inconsolable, my poor baby” Hanbin cooed, petting y/n’s hair as Bobby rolled his eyes.

“Her dad wants to see you. I’ll give you five minutes to get rid of your problem, y/n come with me there’s cake” Bobby said, pulling y/n with him and shutting the door on Hanbin. He sighed as he stood in the dark, banging his head against the door because now he was nervous about what her dad wanted. Problem solved.

“Do you drink?” Her dad asked, his meeting room of choice was the laundry room and Hanbin stared at the clothes spinning in the washer.

“Yes but no. No?”

“Do you want to calm your nerves or are you okay?”

Hanbin sighed, “I’m okay, just curious”

“I’ll get to the point then. Do you want to marry her?” He asked, Hanbin felt his heart beat against his chest as he rubbed at his stomach nervously.

“Um, please? I adore her” Hanbin laughed, blowing air out of his mouth as her dad nodded.

“Do you have a ring yet? Are you certain because... I don’t think it’s in your best interest to even consider breaking her heart. You know, Jiwon would kick your ass”

“Yeah,” Hanbin mumbled, “never in a million years. I want to spend my life with her, and I did buy a ring already. I don’t have it on me, I’ve been waiting to ask you for her hand for what seems like forever”

Y/n’s dad laughed, patting Hanbin on the shoulder, “she’s a special case, nervous as hell, I’m glad she likes you”

“I’m glad she likes me too”

The rest of the night went by smoothly, Hanbin had invited y/n back to the dorms with him and they gave Bobby a ride too. Hanbin was in a tremendously good mood, cracking jokes and offering to buy everyone ice cream for a movie night, sending Bobby to the store while he kissed y/n in the car.

“Someone’s in a good mood” y/n laughed, pulling away from Hanbin who looked like he had hearts in his eyes. He adored her, she was his whole world, his pretty lady.

“I just love you so much, can you blame me?” Hanbin laughed, sitting back in his seat with a smile while y/n poked his stomach.

“I love you more! Like you handled everything like an expert” y/n said, holding onto his hand and watching him smirk.

“I can handle you like an expert”

“Shut up”

When they finally got the the dorms, it was somewhat of a frenzy, Hanbin didn’t quite understand why everyone was suddenly coming to him to solve their problems but everyone freaked out even more when they saw y/n.

“Oh hey y/n, come look at this dog I saw!” Yunhyeong said, dragging y/n away as the rest of the boys seemed to be wrestling on the floor.

“What the hell is happening right now?” Hanbin groaned, heading to the kitchen to put the ice cream away while everyone followed. Bobby helped, just as skeptical as Hanbin when Donghyuk dragged Jinhwan into the room. Jinhwan looked terrified, everyone looked terrified, he was holding his arms behind his back and almost crapped himself under the heavy stare of both Hanbin and Bobby.

“W-we found the um...the ring” Jinhwan whispered, flinching when Hanbin looked entirely shocked. Mostly because they were in his room looking through his things and he had a lot of things in there, and a lot of y/n’s things as well.

“And? What the hell” Hanbin hissed, watching Bobby walk around the counter and grab Jinhwan’s arm. It took Hanbin a while to figure out what was happening, but as his eyes focused on Jinhwan’s left hand he felt a mix of emotions. The strongest one was anger, confusion as to why the hell they’d done it.

“Cut his fucking finger off,” Hanbin muttered, everyone in the room collectively losing their shit while Bobby tried to pull the ring from Jinhwan’s finger, “are you guys insane?! Do you know I was planning on proposing tonight? She’s literally here right now!”

“It was an accident! We’ve tried everything!” Donghyuk whimpered, terrified for his life when Hanbin slammed open the fridge and grabbed the mayonnaise.

“Oh god, no” Jinhwan whined, covering his face as Hanbin dropped some onto his hand and gripped the ring, yanking hard and nearly tearing his whole finger off. Jinhwan was practically crying at the end, everyone watching Hanbin like he was a ticking time bomb as he rinsed off the ring and made sure the diamonds were free of condiments.

“Touch my shit again...I dare you” Hanbin whispered, leaving the room and finding y/n waiting patiently in the living room, “baby, wanna go somewhere?”

“Didn’t we just get here?” Y/n laughed, watching Jinhwan sulk by and knowing Hanbin was probably a little on edge and being mean to them.

“Yeah but...let’s get out of here” Hanbin shrugged, giving her a cheesy lopsided grin when she nodded. They took a walk, he bought her an ice cream cone that they shared while he told her about how much fun he had. Y/n was delighted, trying not to fight him when he ate half the ice cream in one bite, but snuggling close to his side anyways.

“It’s cold and you bought me ice cream, seems like you’re trying to get rid of me” y/n mumbled, sitting on a bench after Hanbin and draping her legs across his lap.

“The complete opposite, I swear. I just wanted to talk to you in private” Hanbin mumbled, catching her chin between his fingers and making y/n blush.

“In private? We couldn’t just go to your room. Are you going to ask me to be your girlfriend? I don’t think you ever asked” y/n teased, scooting closer to kiss him while Hanbin stopped her. Uncharacteristic for him, he would never deny kisses, especially when there was no one around to see.

“Ah,” Hanbin sighed, shaking his head while his girlfriend got impatient. Hanbin was only like this when there was something important going on, it kind of scared y/n, “would you ever consider spending the rest of your life with me?”

Y/n snorted, covering her mouth with her hand, “What a question. Duh, do you want me to prove it to you?”

“How?” Hanbin mumbled, suddenly interested in her tone and losing sight of his objective.

“We can go home and I can-“

“Wait wait. No, now is not the time. Sit here I’ll be right back” Hanbin said, kissing her cheek before running off to god knows where. Hanbin sat at the next bench out of sight, trying to psych himself up to do this, he really wanted to but he also didn’t want to cry. He heard footsteps and thought it was y/n but it was really just garbage blowing in the wind across the way, a clear reminder of something Hanbin felt like without her...

“Okay, you were gone forever” y/n teased, watching Hanbin come back with a blank look on his face. She raised an eyebrow, not knowing what he was up to at all, his idea of a poker face usually was just a mean face. Y/n watched as Hanbin knelt between her legs, she glanced around the park with a blush on her cheeks and Hanbin just rolled his eyes as he held his hand out.

“Can we get married? I want to be your husband forever”

He didn’t know what he expected out of her, the crying definitely, the clinging yes, the public displays of affection were something he didn’t expect but he could only allow so much of it before he was tugging her back towards the dorms.

Bobby was eating ice cream alone in his room, missing his cousin and hoping Hanbin would bring her back soon to play video games when his phone rang. He couldn’t pause his match but knew Hanbin would explode if he didn’t answer so he did, “yes?”

“Please clear out the dorm, get them out of there, I’m on my way home”

“Does this mean she said yes?”

“Jiwon your cousin is seconds away from getting handsy with me in the elevator and I fear for my life, just get them out of the dorms” Hanbin pleaded, sounding desperate in a way only y/n could make him. They were so annoying, now Bobby and Hanbin were going to be related. Now he had to take care of their kids.

“Fine. You owe me”

“I already told your mom you had a girlfriend and she didn’t kill you. Now you owe me” Hanbin muttered, hanging up while Bobby groaned, throwing a pillow at his girlfriend who was sleeping in his bed before quickly going to kiss her forehead.

“Sorry babe, we have company tonight”

#kim hanbin #b.i #yg ikon #ikon #hanbin scenarios #hanbin imagine #ikon hanbin #ikon scenario #kpop scenario #kpop imagines #hanbin x reader #b.i x reader #hanbin reaction #ikon reaction

144 notes · View notes

beheadingofmakai · 6 years

Text

“Baller”

Lance “The Monster God” @tainbocuailnge hit me with:

for writing prompts, how about someone drunk bidding on a sword (or other weapon you're the one who knows shit about weapons) on ebay only to find out when it arrives that it is a magic and/or possessed sword that /desperately/ wants to belong to some mythical ancient hero despite it being the good old year of 2018 and if it has to whip its new owner into shape then so be it

So sit back, grab your pop corn, and let Uncle Drimo Beheading tell you the story of an unemployed man who drank a little bit too much and got in a scuffle with a mysterious man with an anime avatar, an event that changed his life.

———

“...And who the shit has an anime avatar on ePay?! You mean this freaking nerd outbid me? Get the hell out, let’s see what other deals he’s in, you’ve crossed the wrong unemployed drunk, shithead.”

The dark room’s sole source of light was the monitor’s light blue hue, reflected on a man’s glasses that sat in front of two tired, drunken, furious eyes.

2:38 AM, three bottles of schrobbeler, twelve cans of stout and a small army of discarded potato chip bags. It was a particularly bitter Friday, now Saturday, for Jan, and what better remedy for the sorrows of modern life than senseless spending? Like syrup finding is way down one’s throat, vigilantly hunting for a cold, the act of burning money seems oddly cathartic. It’s very much just pretending one’s current problems aren’t there by simply creating more trouble for oneself in the future. And sometimes, this future trouble is worth it if one’s splurging involves spiting someone with an anime avatar and a lot of booze. Not really, but it sure as hell seems so during the heat of a bid war.

“You think you’re hot shit, xX_KimikoKisser937_Xx? That I’m gonna let you flaunt your weight around just because you got some disposable income? I’m gonna shit on your sofa!”

Bills are a pain in the ass, aren’t they? Water, light, real estate, food expenses, cab fare... We’re lucky these brutes haven’t found a way to pipe oxygen and charge us for it yet, but it is what it is. And for bills, you need a job, for you kill those with your paycheck. Things were rocky, but stable enough the last few months for Jan Wildemors, but just yesterday, Fate decided to be that unlikable bitch we all hate and that hates us back, and he was laid off. No feedback or reason given, either. He was handed his stuff in a box that was missing a flap, and told to go, thank you for your hard work the last eight months, which is a very polite and corporate way of saying “go choke on a cat-o-nine-tails composed entirely of dildos”.

“Hah! Really regret on screwing me over with that keyboard now, don’t you, jackass?” Jan adjusted his glasses as he proudly asserted his dominance, victory his, not really sure what he just bought, but satisfied with the knowledge that he did. Hooray, unhealthy coping mechanisms! With his objective complete and his body at its limit, Jan went down like a glorious baboon that just missed a branch during its jump, his face smacking his desk as he lost consciousness like an ape plummets down a tree: With a lot of drool and a dull thud.

———

“Now, hold on just a second, let me check one more time with my bank, and--”

“Hey, you bought it, I just deliver it, now please just sign up already, and with all due disrespect, wear some pants next time. The day’s not even begun, and your hairy legs already ruined it. And yesterday too, retroactively.”

As the confused, unemployed man signed the paper on the clipboard (with a lent pen, of course), he was left one on one with the fruit of his idiocy: An ornate box, long and purple, the most expensive thing in the small apartment by far without even accounting for whatever it contained. “Oh man, oh man, I really messed up last night...”. Well! Whatever! It’s here already, so might as well open it! The best part of messing up is when you finally realize there’s no use in crying over spilled! Hooray, unhealthy coping mechanisms!

Inside the long and purple box was nothing other than a longsword, ornate and majestic. It was at this point that our dearest Jan propped a chair close to the window and prepared himself to just fucking throw himself out of it headfirst into the speeding traffic from the fourth floor.

“Welp, that’s that. I went and bought a sword. A sword. I can’t buy anything fancier than instant ramen or soggy lettuce leaves, not even the whole thing, I just got laid off from my job, and the first thing my drunk ass does is buy a sword. No wonder I had no cash when I checked in the morning. Well, alright, I’d like to thank my father for my ethics, my mother for my sense of humor, and neither of them for my savvy with finances, now let’s check out heaven, alley oop!”

“A moment, if you would.”

“Oh, sweet, the delirium is starting to kick in, I can hear voices! I love nervous breakdowns!”

“Face me when I speak to you, boy.”

Jan froze in place. This was the first time the panic voices ever were so untoward. He considered, for just a second, that maybe he truly wasn’t alone in this room, that perhaps, against all odds, that which was inside the box was the one...

“...Yes, it is I that speaks to you, now turn around and face me already, you unruly child.”

In the words of Oscar Wilde himself: “Holy shite”.

“Hold on, what, no one told me swords could speak.”

“And they normally don’t, but I am not a normal sword.”

On top of the chair, wearing only a sleeveless white t-shirt and coffee stained boxers, Jan Wildemors faced the sword in the purple box, a faint silver aura blanketing it, the two staring at each other while Jan comprehended, little by little, that his mundane life was about to end. The faint glow of the morning sun that filtered in through the closed blinds accentuated this scene, the young man’s face stained with lines of bewilderment and amazement.

He then faced the window and tried to throw himself out again.

“H-hey, stop trying to kill yourself for a second and hear me out, will you not!? What kind of reaction is this to the honor of being addressed to by Moonflare itself!”

“Yeah, no thanks! I’m not only unemployed and in debt, now I am being plunged into some magic nonsense that I want no part of! This truly is the end for me!”

“Wait, you’ve no job and you owe money? That’s less than ideal, young one.”

“And now a sword is criticizing my life choices! This sucks!”

“Just hear me out, damn it!”

“Aaaaaa!”

“Baller”

———

“Coffee or juice?”

“I’m a sword.”

“Yeah.”

The young man sat in front of the sword, sipping his coffee, finally wearing pants, the weapon unmoved from the purple box, its faint silver flow still emanating like a candle at the end of a long, dark hallway. A resigned sigh is all the young man could muster, lifting his arms in very real surrender.

“Alright, let’s do this. What’s up?”

“What do you mean, ‘what’s up’? First your purchase me and now you wonder what the dickens I am? Where is it that I came from? How could you possibly acquire a Resonant Arm without knowing? Is this some manner of jest?”

“Yeah, look, I’m not going to lie to you, Monsieur Sword, I--”

“Moonflare.”

“Hm?”

“I’m no Monsieur, nor am I a Madame, I am a sword with a name, and that name is Moonflare. Be sure to use it.”

“Yeah, sure. Anyways, so yesterday, I was laid off from my job, so I got real damn drunk, and decided, yeah, Imma buy a gaming keyboard! It’s a sound investment! It’ll improve my morale and help out with my job hunting!”

“Uh huh...”

Jan stretched and sipped from his coffee, making keyboard motions with his free hand. “No, for real, reward yourself, and then be responsible without a regret! It works! Sometimes! Unfortunately, the model I wanted was the last one in stock in ePay, this bidding website for online transactions--”

“You bought me online!?” Moonflare cut in.

“What, that weird?”

“I’m a Resonant Arm! It’s akin to saying someone bought a priceless relic on the internet!”

“Well, about that...” Jan produced his smartphone, tapped it a couple of times, and pointed the screen to the hilt, where he assumed the sword’s “eyes” were. Jan is no sword biologist, so we hope you’ll excuse his beginner’s mistake. “...People kinda buy really expensive things like the Mona Liz--”

“Someone bought the Mona Lizard!?”

“On the internet.”

“Curses!”

“Yeah, so I guess you ended up being sold off online, and whether your previous owner knew about you being a Restaurant Arm or not is anyone’s guess, but the fact is, the keyboard I wanted was ripped from my bloody, splintered fingers by some asshole with an anime avatar that outbid me at the last second. So I got mad and went to outbuy him in something else he was putting money in for.”

“...What for?”

“A foolish and short-lived sense of satisfaction and spite.”

“Marvelous, and that’s how you came to own me.”

“That’s the whole shebang, ya.”

If the sword had eyes, their revolutions per second would create a localized cyclone. It was clear this was a six piece McNobody who just obtained them as a consequence of bad impulse control and good taste in alcohol.

“...Well then,” Moonflare finally let out, as if forcing words out of its sword throat. “You know, at least you’re honest. Well, this might just be what you need.”

Jan’s eyebrow raised inquisitively. “...What do you mean?”

“This could be destiny at play, young man. No job, crippling debt, the end of the road, that’s what life is for you right now. And at the moment of most need, when you see the horizon as a guillotine encroaching on your throat with each passing day, cooped up in this cell that no doubt will be subjected to embargo, you come across me, Moonflare the Pilgrimbreaker, Resonant Arm... No doubt you see where this is going, right?”

“What are you suggesting...?” Jan inquired, his interest thoroughly piqued.

“You can be a Hero. I can make you a Hero. One worthy of wielding the real me. Look around you, you know you want this. Say, what’s that poster over there, above the couch?”

Jan looked to where the sword had verbally pointed and found his old Funny Fantasy VII poster, with its protagonist boldly wielding his weapon in an action pose.

“It’s my Funny Fantasy VII Collector’s Edition poster. It’s my favorite game ever.”

“And who is that brazen, courageous man showcased oh so prominently in the forefront?”

“That’s Clown Strife! A failed JESTER who didn’t have it in him to make it big in the ranks of the CIR.cus organization! After taking to wandering as a mercenary, his freelancing eventually landed him smack in the middle of a huge, world-class incident!”

“Poetic, is it not? You’ve just been released from your own job, you’re swamped in debt, and nothing seems to be going right... And that’s when we cross roads. It’s not only that you don’t really have a choice, this is the right choice. We’ll make it big.”

For the first time in years, Jan’s eyes shone with a fire they had long forgotten. Hopping from job after job, doing shit he didn’t wanna do, forcing smiles for nasty bosses who didn’t give a damn about him... It could all be over. It could all remain in the past, were he to become a Hero.

“I’ll do it.” he said, resolution dripping from his voice and fire emanating from his eyes like a faulty smelter. “Let’s do this!”

———

“Let’s not do this!”

“Quit whining and give me ten more laps!”

“Stop giving me more laps!”

“Then stop whining, cur!”

It’s been a week of this tragedy. Day after day, night after night, the sword and man duo engaged in this pitiful play. Moonflare, the sharpest drill sergeant in town, attacked the would-be Hero with arduous routine after routine, if one could call “20 hours straight of morbidly harsh training” a routine, by any stretch. When he was finally done doing suspended midair push-ups with a tire, Moonflare gave the signal (which is a disappointed sigh, by the way), and Jan finally came down.

“You’ve got the physical condition, Jan, you are fit and can move well, but you don’t take pressure well.” the sword chided. “How are we going to achieve fame like this?”

“...”

This silent reply didn’t go unnoticed.

“Is there something that’s bothering you, young one?”

“Yes, actually. You keep mentioning ‘fame’. We need to be the best to cause an impression this, we need to be at our peak condition that, you seem really obsessed with fame. Isn’t a Hero’s role to save people in the first place?”

But now, the silence came from the sword.

“...Hey, I’ve put up with this for a week, you could at least tell me what a Restaurant Arm is already in addition to answering to what I just said. I’m breaking my back, almost literally, here.”

“You make a good point.” the sword replied with what almost was a sigh. “A Resonant Arm, and please get ‘Resonant’ right already, is a weapon crafted with a fragment of a powerful weapon of legend. In this body, I am powerful sword with capabilities far beyond regular weapons, yet, I’m still a shade of my true potential. It’s because only a shard of my original body is in this shell.”

“Oh! So wait, you’re not just some delirium or haunted sword with delusions of grandeur?”

“I ought to pierce a lung of yours for that statement, hmph! Indeed, I am not a figment of your desperate psyche, I am indeed THE Moonflare, the Pilgrimbreaker, the Discipliner, the...”

Jan scratched his head as he drank some water as Moonflare went on and on with his titles before he interjected. “I’ve never heard of you.”

That window shattering in the distance? That’s Moonflare’s confidence you just heard. “...Yeah, that’s the problem.”

“Hm?”

“...I am a legendary weapon, but I am unsung, because my previous master didn’t care for fame in the slightest.”

Jan simply looked at the sword, as if telling it to go on.

“...Centuries ago, I belonged to The Pilgrimbreaker, a very unknown Hero. There’s no records of her real name, for she refused to announce it, there’s no records of her face, for she always wore a helmet that shrouded it, and there’s no records of where she went to after the Mana Turbulence, for she disappeared without saying a word after all was said and done. Just a few souls in this world know about her, hence why I’m an unsung legendary weapon.”

“Huh... I was thinking she was small time, but the Mana Turbulence was a big deal way back in the day, wasn’t it? Was she weak compared to the other Heroes or something?”

“Nonsense!” Moonflare suddenly raised its voice in stark contrast to its usual calm bearing. “Pilgrimbreaker was the real deal! I never could see eye to eye with her, but I will never tolerate illspeak of her!”

“W-woah!”

“Her form was perfect, her mind impenetrable, her defense unbreakable and her aggression irresistible! She struck fear in whoever was in the wrong side of her blade! Do you know where she got the moniker of Pilgrimbreaker, boy!?”

“Moonflare, calm down, I didn’t mean to--”

“She singlehandedly infiltrated the dread cavern where the Pilgrims Of Brozarok held the Ritual Of Turbulence, which would’ve torn the world’s apart thrice had it been completed, and killed every last one of the wicked dastards! Her arm swished left and right, which each move an impact responding, each swipe a life taking, over and over, dodging curses and enduring maladies! She fought for an entire two days, killing every single Pilgrim in the cavern. By the time four hours had passed, I had gone dull from the sheer and excessive amount of cleaving, and yet, she relented not! With myself as a blunt hunk of moonsteel, she kept going, going, and going! What once were slashes now were blunt strikes, but her sheer strength would break them apart all the same! By the forty eighth hour, when she had broken every Pilgrim and stopped the Ritual, her own sword arm lay shattered and her muscles swollen. She saved the world! She saved us all...”

“...But she’s not famous, not unlike the other Heroes whose names are now in history books, huh?”

Today, Jan learned that swords could indeed cry. “Indeed... The other Heroes actually acknowledged and respected her. Some admired her! They worked together many times, and they were all equally instrumental in stopping the Turbulence. However, she always insisted in others not singing her praises. She foolishly refused to reveal face or name, and eventually, history forgot her.”

“...I guess that explains why you were sold as an antique at best online. No one knows the true of your previous Master, and thus, of your deeds.”

“...Yes. I suppose that makes sense.”

“So I guess your true body, that is, the true Moonflare is elsewhere, if only a fragment is built in you?” Jan inquired, going back to that topic not only because of his genuine curiosity, but also to change the topic, as it clearly was a sensitive topic for Moonflare.

“Yes and no. The ‘true’ Moonflare would imply I’m a fake one. I am indeed Moonflare, just, not in my true body. This blade was forged with a fragment found in the cavern where the Pilgrims met their end. As thus, I have consciousness in this ‘body’. Resonant Arms are called a such because they resonate with their true bodies, and can thus direct their owners to the real legendary weapons. Since it’s my body, I know where it is -- where I am.”

Jan’s eyes shot wide open and he choked on water. “Pwaah! H-hold on, if we can go get your real body, then why haven’t we done that?! We’ve just been wasting time for a week!”

“It’s not that easy. I need to make sure you are worthy. Not anyone can handle a legendary weapon, and you need to show me your physical and mental aptitude. That’s why, today, we’ll have a little test.”

“What? What’s this test? If you make me run more laps, I swear to Aunt Jemima I’ll--”

“We’ll go and do heroic deeds! The streets are dangerous at night, no? We’ll go and stop a crime! Then, I shall judge you!”

“Oh!”

It was finally time. After a whole week of this tiresome nonsense, of pushing his body to the utter limit, of ragging his muscles to shreds, it was finally time to engage in the whole Heroing dealio! And Jan, our strapping would-be Hero, simply couldn’t wait.

———

The streets of the city aren’t exactly what you’d call safe. In fact, they are not what you’d call “oh they are alright as long as you stay in the main streets and by the light”, either. Every back alley you see is a brave new world of armed robbery and assault, with your neck and wallet ripe for the taking. The ideal place to truly thrive as the scum of society and get your doctorate in banditry. Why, just now, a helpless office worker, on her way back from overtime, has found herself tangled in an interesting business proposition between herself and a switchblade pressed against her neck. The switchblade’s companion, a rather forceful fellow with an iron grip and a neck covered in veins, currently yells at her politely, suggesting she voluntarily makes a generous donation to his wallet. How beautiful they are, the streets of this city, rife with opportunity and bankrupted in morals and safety.

Little did the streets know that a brand new market element was about to change their business dynamic.

“Hold it right there, fiend!”

The sudden voice blindsided the mugger not from behind, but from above. As his neck craned to see just who in the world would dare interrupt such an important business meeting, he soon found his answer: It was the man wielding a longsword that currently plummeted towards him.

“The fu--!” The mugger moved out of the way in time to avoid feasting on boots, finally finding himself face to face with the vigilante. The lady that was being mugged couldn’t help but stare in disbelief at the cloaked figure of justice, its silver blade glimmering under the moonlight with unnatural fervor. The billowing cape and the small domino mask made it abundantly clear that this was no mere civilian, this was a vigilante who meant business.

“R-repent now, wrongdoer! Surrender yourself peacefully, and you may yet know mercy!”

“Oi! What’s wrong! Don’t stutter your lines!” Moonflare whispered.

“H-how do you expect me not to!? These lines are so cheesy and stupid...! J-just let me handle the script, yeah?”

“Absolutely not! Who is the seasoned legendary weapon here? If I may be so bold, I believe I know more about this whole Hero business than you do! Just follow my lead and we’ll rake in the fame I de-- we deserve! Now shush!”

With a sigh, Jan simply surrendered and went along with it, dramatically pointing the sword towards his foe. “Hark! Release the dame or taste the righteous fury of the Pilgrimbreaker, miscreant! Know that I shan’t stay my hand a second longer!”

“...pfff...”

A small chuckle finally interrupted the monologue of the would-be Hero. It wasn’t the mugger that let it out, however, it was the victim.

“pppfff... I-I’m sorry, but wow, you are extremely lame. A domino mask? Cape? Really? What C-list telenovela did you jump out from? Shouldn’t you be looking for your missing baby? Maybe slashing ‘Z’s on walls like a loser? Please do me a favor and let me get robbed, it’d be far more dignified than letting you save me, Costume Party.” the lady mercilessly commented, performing Herculean efforts to contain her laughter.

“Shit, I know, right? Who goes, ppfppfffffff, who goes all ‘reepehnt villuns!’ anymore? Did your mom slam dunk you when you were a child, guy? Cloak and mask over sweatpants and a sleeveless wife beater with coffee stains? Really?” the robber added, shaking his head.

“A full outfit is expen--”

“Then don’t wear any at all, idiot! You only look like an overgrown manchild going out trick or treating! You really looked at yourself in the mirror and thought, ‘yeah, this is cool, I look like justice itself, I’ll drown in pussy!’?” the supposed victim harshly mocked, her laughter now out of control.

“Pffff, yeah right, this guy couldn’t score in brothel. His birth certificate is an apology note from the condom factory. Imagine being this asshole’s mom!”

“Oh, fuck off! Someone carried this thing for nine months! Imagine looking at this dude’s FateBook and seeing him posting pics of his outfit, like, ‘Yeah! Ready to fight crime! #Herointhemaking’, and then thinking, yeah, I did this, I made this, I was irritable and in pain for 9 months so I could bring this specimen to the world. At that point, I rip my ovaries out with my own hands and play ping pong with them.” she mercilessly chided.

“Bwaaahahahaha! Hey, you are really funny, and pretty cute, now that I look at you.” observed the criminal, apparently taken with her, now that he could see her better, out of the darkest reaches of the back alley.

“You are not bad yourself... I like a man that can handle a knife. Say, are you free right now? I’d like to unwind after work. We had a meeting today and my bitch of a supervisor, who happens to be why I drink, was on one of those moods today.”

“I’m down for that. I know a really good place here, they have craft beer really cheap, since they make it themselves, and the steak is to die for. Let’s leave Captain Virgin behind and get started!”

The mugger and the victim looked at each others’ eyes with just an inkling of passion for a few seconds before walking away, arm in arm, leaving behind our would-be Hero, the night young and ripe for their taking. It was the beginning of a beautiful relationship that would steer the young man towards rehabilitation and for him to abandon the ways of the petty street criminal, working long and hard for his doctorate in electrical engineering, a career he dropped out of, with the loving support of his girlfriend, whose own lifestyle greatly improved thanks to his good domestic skills and the encouraging fire of his pep talks. Together, they had three children (two of them twins) and lived a happy, humor filled life, growing old together, hand in hand.

Anyways, back to the present, where Jan’s self-esteem was shattered into so many pieces that you couldn’t even vacuum clean them.

“...What did just happen...?” Moonflare inquired, confused, no scratching his sword chin with the sword hand it didn’t have.

“C-crime successfully prevented! A-all part of the plan!”

“Are you crying?”

“Of joy!”

“Are you also trembling of joy?”

“Y-yup!”

“...In your parlance, this ‘sucked’, didn’t it?”

“Yup.”

“I really don’t know what to say, Jan. This is the first time I see an attempt at crimestopping end up in matchmaking. You might be cut out to be a Cupid more than a Hero, perhaps. Well, no matter, let’s try with the next--”

“Oh no no, look here, we’re not doing this again.” the would-be Hero vehemently declared, ripping his tiny domino mask off and throwing it in a nearby trash can. “No way. This sucks. Your way sucks. I’m absolutely not doing this your way. Look, we’re doing this my way, or it’s the highway for you.”

“Fool, I’ve got more experience, you must listen to me, and then we’ll be famous!” argued Moonflare, its silver glow intensifying as if to show irritation.

“You’ve no legs, so the highway means I’ll dunk you into the nearest river and call it a day. Now, you listen to me and you better listen well, Moonflare.” Jan’s voice finally hardened up, much like his grip on Moonflare’s hilt. “I’m neck-deep in debt, out of a job, stuck with a stupid sword that talks like a shitty Shakespearian secondary character, humiliated and ready to go and throw myself off that window, just like I should have. You either take me to your real body right now, or I’ll really make sure no one can find you. I’ll take a damn loan for a shovel and some scubba gear, dipshit. I’ll bury you at the bottom of a river or a lake, and no one will know.”

“Jan, please wait, you are clearly making a hasty decision here, your body and mind are not ready for the brunt of a legendary weapon, just follow my lead and--”

“And keep playing Cupid to victims and their would be assailants? Fuck off and fuck you. You’ve three seconds to start leading the way.”

Seeing as there was no convincing Jan, Moonflare finally complied, giving in to the demands of Captain Vir-- Jan.

———

Marble tiles, ivory pillars, and a massive sanctum lit only by mysterious floating gems that shone a dim blue. This was the Sanctum Of Moonflare, hidden deep within the underground, a place impossible to reach unless you know of it, as the path to it will capriciously twist and curve to kick you out if you don’t, leading you back to the entrance, no doubt all part of the arcane architecture that the gnomes who built this place are known for. Only Heroes, or those with the aptitude to become one, could reach this place.

“Well, it’s awfully convenient that this was located under the sewers of my city. What are the odds?”. Jan wore his trademark sleeveless white t-shirt and black sweatpants, without the silly cape and mask, of course. The majestic room clearly had gotten his attention, his eyes scanning the place thoroughly with child-like admiration, whistling at the intricate handiwork of the engravings in the ivory pillars that held the place together. “Sure looks like a place where you’d find a legend!”

“Odds had nothing to do with it.” curtly replied Moonflare. “We are no longer underneath your city. We are far, far away, in another country, actually.”

“Oh, quit it. We just went down a manhole, don’t try to embellish your shitty tale more than you need to.”

“I speak the truth, cur. This place is not subject to the physics and logic of the world. All Sanctums that hold a legendary weapon are hidden away in places that would be impossible to reach physically, and instead, one must know of the place and fulfill a certain number of rules in order to reach them. My Sanctum, as an unsung weapon, hasn’t difficult rules, as you can see.”

“I assume they are something like ‘knowing about the place’, ‘travelling underground while intending to reach it’, and ‘carrying a fragment of Moonflare’?”

The sword didn’t respond for a few seconds. “...That’s spot on, actually. Those are the three rules. How did you...?”

“Intuition. Places like this turn up in games and novels a lot. Perhaps they were inspired by the real tales of old Heroes in the first place, with no one knowing any better.”

“...The era of mass information is terrifying.” the sword lamented, still not used to the 21st century.

In the center of the massive Sanctum, a staircase led to an altar where a protrusion with a sword planted in it could be seen. As the duo approached the gorgeous marble staircase, the engravings of the ivory altar, which turned out to be runes, glowed with the same dim blue at the crystals that floated aimlessly, resonating with the fragment in the incomplete Moonflare, the structure making a noise that was simultaneously organic and mechanical.

“Well, it’s ready. Try and fail so we can get out of here.”

“...So, you are a sword in a stone that only the worthy can pull out, huh?”

“Good, seems you’re familiar with the concept. Saves me having to explain it to you. This is what I meant when I said you were not ready. Now, give it your futile go so we can go back and apply ourselves to accruing fame.”

As Jan’s hand approached the indigo hilt of the true Moonflare, just inches away before he could grip it, Jan and Moonflare were interrupted by a slow clap behind them.

“Bravo! You actually made it here. My compliments! Now, would you please turn around and face me, you thief? I’d so love to see your face.”

Surprised by the sudden personage, the duo turned around to see a man dressed in an exquisite purple suit, two long and curved blades hanging on his hips, one on each side. “What do you mean, ‘thief’? I ain’t taken a thing from you.”

“I disagree, you lout. That sword you insolently grip right now should have been mine to begin with.” he replied, his footsteps echoing in the ample hall as he approached Jan.

“Hold on... xX_KimikoFucker456_Xx!? Is that you!?”

“Kisser! xX_KimikoKisser937_Xx! Get it right!”

“So it is you, the weeb from ePay that outbid my keyboard! You asshole, I should’ve guessed only someone with an username like that would wear a tacky purple suit and carry two... Ppfff.... Two katanas! My goodness, you really are a disaster! Where’s your fedora? Shouldn’t you be at home complaining about the fairer sex?”

“These are tachi, you ignorant, insolent nobody! And the plural of ‘katana’ is ‘katana’, which you’d know if you knew anything about weaponry. You’ve got a lot of nerve to outbuy me for a Resonant Arm, but... I wager you had no clue it was one, am I wrong?”

“Oh, please, of course I kn--”

“He had no idea and everything you say is correct”

“Moonflare, shut up, the people with opposable thumbs are talking right now!”

“You’re telling me this is all because you were mad that I outbid you for a gaming keyboard? You went a got in a bidding war with me for a legendary weapon just because you couldn’t accept that someone took a blasted keyboard from you?”

“Ye.”

“Incredible.”

“Indeed, I said the same.”

xX_KimikoKisser937_Xx sighed and simply took a stance, his hand on the left tachi’s hilt. “...My name is Clement Marmaduke Solaris, and I challenge you to a duel for the Moonflare that you currently hold. In the impossible case that you defeat me, I shall gracefully relent and admit defeat, pursuing you nevermore.”

“Hey, quick question.” Jan shot at Clement as he readied his blade in a stance unlike anything Moonflare taught him during the hellish training week. “Does everyone involved with legendary weaponry and Heroes and all this jimjam talk like a loser nerd? Is it part of, like, a contract? Why do none of you speak like a fucking real person? Is it too hard to not be immediately unlikable as soon as you open your mouth?”

“...Do you accept my duel?”

“On one condition. If I win, you gotta give me the keyboard.”

“You’re still going on about that, Jan!?” the sword chastised, but Clement simply laughed.

“Very well. If I win, I get Moonflare, and if you win, you get the Palanquin Corsair K195 RGB Platinum Gaming Keyboard.”

With a nod, both men agreed to the terms of the duel, and not ten seconds passed before they were at it, the two clashing as the altar with the true Moonflare served as their judge. Eschewing all of the sword’s antiquated teachings, Jan’s fighting style was far more fluid and natural than the proper sword technique Moonflare would rather he used, involving tumbling on the ground and spinning, launching unpredictable slashes and thrusts from every direction and angle.

“Jan! What in the world is this!”

“Breakdancing! I do this a lot, hence why I was in shape before your training. Your formal style is too stiff and old, this suits me better!”

“We’ll never be famous with a silly style like this! Just use the proper style of Pilgrimbreaker, and--”

“Fame, fame, fame! It’s all you talk about! Put a sock on it, already! I don’t give a fuck!”

But just because he was doing much better didn’t mean he had the advantage. Clement’s technique was equally unorthodox, drawing his blade with lightning speed and re-sheathing it, shooting out attacks with immense force as he attacked and defended at the same time.

“Impressive, Jan. I didn’t think you’d last a second against my Iaijutsu.”

“Just like a weeb to use freakin’ Iai... But I hate to admit that you are really good at it.”

“Oh, you flatter me, but you’d seen nothing!”

Jan spun and flipped in the air to attack Clement with a smashing overhead, but the man in the suit, with practiced mastery and a cool head, blocked the attack using his tachi’s pommel, paralyzing Jan with the impact, and subsequently launching him across the room with a powerful sheath thrust to the gut, saliva and tears shooting from Jan’s face.

“Phwoo! Sh-shit... He’s really good...” Jan struggled to say as he cough and barely managed to get back on his wobbly feet, the air knocked out of him. “...He may be a loser, but he’s a strong one...!”

“Cease this child’s play and use the style I taught you already, Jan!”

“I’m afraid there’s no need to. I’m done playing.” Clement approached the duo, none the worse for wear, the pressure around him increasing tenfold compared to what it was before. He was clearly holding back, but playtime was over. “You are a disappointment, Jan. I held back to see if you truly had what it takes, but you don’t even clear the minimum requirement. That Moonflare and you are opposites, and thus, without ever agreeing on what your purpose should be, nay, in how you should even move, you’ll never unleash its true potential. Ready yourself.” Without letting go of the hilt on his left hip, Clement’s left hand now reached for the hilt on his right hip.

“...Wait, no way, are you really gonna--!”

“Hwaa!”

He was less a man and more a raging storm. With speed that defies comprehension, Clement’s attacks doubled in both velocity and quantity, employing iai strikes with both swords at the same time. If the flurry of one such blade was already difficult to keep up with, defending against this storm of steel was impossible. The sheer impact and velocity of the bladed tempest lifted Jan off the floor, silver and blood dancing around his helpless frame as his clothes were ragged to tatters, his mangled body landing square on the altar, next to Moonflare.

“H...Holy shit... I can’t fight that...”

The footsteps approached him. “Indeed, you can’t. Now, surrender the sword. You can’t keep going.”

There simply was no way for Jan to win. With a pained sigh and a bloody cough, he mustered the strength to extend Moonflare towards the Iai master. “Yeah, it makes sense for you to have it... You’ll make a better Hero than me in every way...”

“Hero...? What are you talking about?”

Jan twitched, confusion tinging his face. “Huh? Don’t you want Moonflare to become a Hero?” The statement was apparently a devastating joke, for Clement could barely contain his laughter.

“Of course not, silly. I just want Moonflare in my collection! I’m a collector of weapons who travels all across the world finding different antiques and relics, but alas, I’ve grown tired of simple mundane masterpieces. I’ve set my eyes, thus, on legendary weapons, and with Moonflare as my first, my collection will reach the next level.”

“Hark!” Moonflare interrupted, shining a furious silver. “I’m no ornament! I refuse to gather dust in your vault when there’s heroic deeds to be performed! You can simply commission a replica if you must! You have a fragment of me, as well, don’t you? You wouldn’t be able to come here otherwise.”

“Hah! Indeed, a fragment, albeit one too small to even house your consciousness. I’ve waited here for little over a week for you to show up. A weapon ought to obey, for without an owner, you are nothing. Simply sit tight in my basement as the crown jewel of my collection, O mighty Pilgrimbreaker, and cease your yapping?”

“...Don’t give me that bullshit.”

Blood oozing from his wounds, muscles tearing from the exertion and damage, Jan stood up, a new fire in his eyes. “You know, I was ok with losing to you. Moonflare’s a dick, but it’s a strong sword. If it was in the hands of a capable swordsman, no doubt it could mete out some ridiculous amounts of justice, enough to clean up the streets easily! I was ok with that Hero not being me! But you...”

“Jan...?” “Oh?”

Jan pointed at Clement. “You are no Hero! You’re just a selfish little cunt who wants to feel good by filling his basement with shiny things! I’ll never give Moonflare, the Pilgrimbreaker to you! Not such a storied blade with a bright future in front of it!”

“Hah!” Clement could only laugh. “And how, I wonder and ponder, do you expect to make good on that? You are no match for me. Will you seriously throw yourself to the grinder for these ideals? Heroes are a thing of the past, and should remain so! They have no place in the modern world!”

“Oh, fuck you. Moonflare! I finally understand Pilgrimbreaker.”

“What do you mean...?”

Jan simply took a deep breath and approached the sword stuck in the stone of the altar. “Pilgrimbreaker was a real Hero precisely because she didn’t give a damn about fame. You only held her back, but she still managed to save the world.”

“What!”

“You’re obsessed with fame. You just want the glory of other weapons and their Heroes, and I kinda do feel for you, but that’s not what Heroism is about. You know what my job was before I got fired? I was an insurance agent. I got fired because I kept giving people benefits. Insurance is supposed to be there for when tragedy strikes.”

“...” “Oh...?”

“When you have a car accident, when your parents die, when you get sick with a complex illness, insurance is supposed to cover for you. But my boss kept insisting that we find ways to screw our clients over, to bring up the small letter of a contract and fuck ‘em over! I ignored it, gave our clients our support, and that meant loses for the big wigs on top, loses they recouped by kicking me out. I thought I could make the world a better place, yet, it was another dumb pyramid scheme, the insurance game. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of all this shit!”

Jan grabbed the sword’s hilt. “Moonflare! Pilgrimbreaker was the same! Heroes are all about public image, but she kept fighting as silently and anonymously as she could! Fame didn’t cross her mind! She wanted to make a difference! I admire her, I didn’t know about her until this week, but I wholeheartedly admire her! You should be ashamed of disrespecting her style and respecting only her strength!”

“Jan, I...”

The silver glow of the blade turned gold, and strength seeped into Jan’s body. The golden glow of affinity, achieved only when user and weapon are one mind and one soul, shone brightly from both sword and man, Jan’s words striking chords Moonflare didn’t even know about.

“...Interesting. Still, you won’t be able to draw that sword. A little bit of determination isn’t enough to change the world, which is exactly the kind of power that Moonflare requires to be drawn.”

“Bite me, nerd. Moonflare! Your methods are old, but your power is real! What you need to become a Hero in the modern day is to be a baller!”

“A... A what?”

“Baller! One who can do, no, who does what needs to be done. One who can make a difference, and makes the difference! Not one with the potential, but one with the intent! If we are to change this cynic piece of shit world, you need more than tradition! You need innovation! And with this innovation, we’ll pull out your body!”

“Jan, that’s fine and all, but it’s not how it works! But...” The sword’s golden aura intensified. “Whatever! We’re doing this your way! Let’s do this!”

Jan gripped the true Moonflare with all of his might and pulled, pulled, and pulled. Even the massive power boost from synchronizing with Moonflare didn’t seem to be enough. “W-we can’t do it...! You don’t have the power to change the world just yet, it’s nothing one can achieve overnight! That’s why I didn’t want to bring you here!”

“I don’t have the power to change the world...”

The altar rumbled.

“I don’t have the wisdom, either... The tradition... The pedigree...”

Cracks began to form on the floor surrounding the altar.

“But I have the heart! And there’s no way I’m surrendering you to an egoist jackass like this! I don’t have the power to change the world, but I sure as hell have it to draw one stupid sword--!”

The floor quaked wildly.

“--And start with the small things, like the streets! I don’t have the power to change the world, but that won’t stop me from trying!”

With a sound as loud as an explosion, rocks flew everywhere and a wall of dust obscured Clement’s vision as Jan let out one final scream. When the dust finally settled some, Clement couldn’t believe his eyes. In front of him, Jan stood boldly, the True Moonflare resting atop his shoulder... Still embedded to the rock and the altar, which he simply carried as if it was nothing.

“Y-you what!? You just ripped the altar off the ground?!”

“I got no time for these dumbass traditions and tests of worthiness you losers like so much! This sword is rotting away down here when it could be saving lives and making the world a better place! If I have to take it with stone and altar and all, so be it! I like clubs better than swords, anyways!”

“This is unprecedented...! No one ever ripped the whole altar along with the sword! You technically didn’t draw me, but at the same time, you practically did! Is this the modernity you speak of?”

“Damn right! I’ll drag the entirety of the Sanctum if I need to. A little altar stuck to the sword is nothing! Now, Clement... Clench your teeth.”

“You dastard...! Hand over Moonflare!”

“Take it from me, bitch!”

Clement once again turned into a cyclone of steel, his infinite slashes approaching Jan faster than a ballistic satellite could catch, but Jan stood calm, took a deep breath in, and swung the altar-sword forward, like a baseball bat, with all of his might. The holy altar clashed with the furious steel, and the steel shattered into pieces. Behind the steel was the arm that held it, and the arm, too, was shattered into pieces, mere bone unable to withstand the impact of a ton of ivory and righteous Heroism. Behind the arm that held the steel was a body, and the body was, too, shattered into pieces, the single deft swing enough to incapacitate Clement easily, his mangled body rolling away from the sheer force of the impact, a few lucky bones in his body unbroken.

“W...Wha...? H-how...?”

“The thing is, Clement, you ain’t a baller. You are simply a selfish rich boy who looked at people’s hope and saw an ornament for his wall. You could never swing this blade meant to serve the people. You ain’t shit, Clement.”

———

“Hey, we’re on the newspaper again!”

“...Is it another collateral damage report?”

“...Y-yup...”

The sword sighed.

“We sure are stopping crime and accruing fame, just, not the kind of fame I wanted...”

“Hey! We’re saving people! What if a few cars or buildings get smashed in the process? I-It stimulates the economy!”

“Maybe if you were more careful when swinging me! I have a whole boulder-like altar stuck to my body!”

“Ok, ok, mom, chill. Let’s just go home now. We keep at it like this, and crime’s a-gone in a few weeks. No one wants to risk being clobbered by an altar, after all.”

The duo jumped from rooftop to rooftop, Jan lugging the massive altar casually atop of his shoulder still, less sword and more comically oversized hammer.

“You just wanna keep gaming with that new keyboard, don’t you? I swear... You should be training to be able to draw me properly!”

“You can’t rush Heroism, Moonflare! As long as we keep being ballers, we’ll get there eventually!”

“...Heh, you’re right, Jan. Yeah, sure, let’s go.”

What is a Hero? A beacon of hope for the people? Or someone who acts for their safety in the shadows? Both are valid definitions, and many more kinds of Heroes exist, too. There’s some that are Heroes due to their lineage, while others are self-made, defying expectation and rising to greatness, all that truly matters is that you seek greatness for yourself and others, regardless of how you go about it. Some prefer the bombastic splendor of the spotlight, while others feel comfy in the shadows, but as long as you are excellent to one another and keep going and going, no doubt you’ll become a Hero in your own way, be that sticking to old tradition or carving your own path.

For Jan and Moonflare, the path to being a Hero is to be Ballers.

“...But really, stop causing collateral damage, your debt is only getting worse, you idiot.”

“Oh, shut the hell up.”

...Even if it’s expensive sometimes.

End.

#code:prompt #format:one off #length:short #tainbocuailnge #you sent me a real homerun lance

95 notes · View notes

junkcereals · 4 years

Text

Junk Cereals: Most vital ranking of 19 Cheerios flavors

Cheerios is the biggest, most popular cereal brand. General Mills has marketed four varieties for multiple generations. More recently, more than 15 flavors have been released to give fans almost anything they want. Many are still on shelves, although Peach Cheerios recently left and Cheerios Protein Almond departed last year because General Mills faced a lawsuit because it had less protein than it claimed. Following is a ranking of Cheerios flavors. The large majority are good, which forced some tough choices.

19. Apple Cinnamon Cheerios

I may have eaten Apple Cinnamon Cheerios once as a child and wanting to believe it was good enough to eat again. But my mom knew better. Evidently, this has 12 grams of sugar, which explains that and is a total waste because you wouldn't recognize all that added sugar from a bite of it. All you taste is some apple, a hard it of cinnamon, maybe some more apple. Or maybe not if you've been a smoker for any extended stretch of you're life. I never was and never will be because I satisfy my need for instant gratification with healthy stuff like cereal that has at least three grams of fiber like this stuff. By the way, this cereal has lower vitamin enrichment than some Captain Crunch varieties. Did the captain steal vitamins?

Maybe Apple Cinnamon Cheerios only resembles something I should like because its hearty, woody look and feel appeals to basic masculinity.

18. Regular Cheerios

Cheerios have been around since 1941 when they were called Cheeri Oats, but didn’t become Cheerios until General Mills decided this cereal had earned a better sounding name.

SInce then, Cheerios have been the morning staple of people who just want to get on with their day, as well as those who just want to focus on reading the newspaper rather than whatever ripples or odd spots may appear in their cereal.

Some say vanilla is their favorite ice cream flavor because anything can go in it. Cheerios is the vanilla of cereals. Consumers slice various fruits into Cheerios, such as bananas, strawberries, peaches, blueberries and mango. Avocado? Sure. Other things can go in Cheerios, like chocolate chips, yogurt, peanut butter and M&Ms. No one has yet been bold enough to make an M&M cereal, so put them in Cheerios. Before the explosion of different Cheerios flavors, Danny, who was supposed to be the main character in “Caddyshack,” poured sugar in his Cheerios. He looked like he knew what he was doing, although the plot of the movie suggested otherwise.

17. Multigrain Cheerios

A couple of things stand out about Multigrain Cheerios: its variety of colors, the sound it makes when the O's collide against each other and how it's been around this long. I guess when it came out, it competed with Total because Total was touted as the most healthy cereal ever. But General Mills pointed out that you want 100 percent DV of nine vitamins and minerals in circular form because if you want to be a Lion King, your nutrition is a circle of life.

The name certainly doesn't compel anyone, especially since no one could name the grains in it until recently when it put them on the back of the box (corn, oats, millet, sorghum and rice). Cheerios is too mature to make a game of it. By the way, all those colors in the cereal are real, none artificial. The entire Cheerios brand is consistent about that. Only lower-tier General Mills cereals get food dyes.

16. Toasted Coconut Cheerios

This is the most Whitey McWhite Person cereal to be done. They toasted coconut to put in this. The flavor is totally coconut. Can other fruits be toasted and put into cereal form? What about mango? That would have a more pronounced taste than Toasted Coconut Cheerios. But we don't want our fruit toasted if we really want to eat it. The back of the box features vacation destinations where you may be able to eat real coconuts. But no getaway contest in which to enter. Thanks, General Mills. Please bring on Mango Cheerios and I'll forgive you.

15. Fruity Cheerios

What does Fruity Cheerios give? A general fruity flavor, real nutrition, consistent appearance and taste throughout the bowl. What does Fruity Cheerios not give? An abundance of color, tons of added sugar, a cheerful cartoon character swooping in to slap the well-being out of you. I can’t hold it against Fruity Cheerios that it displays earth tones instead of primary and secondary colors. Product developers obviously deemed Cheerios undeserving of large amounts of food dye and artificial flavors. Besides, there are fruits with earthtones like avocados. People like avocados, so they must be willing to give this a chance.

Fruity Cheerios aims to be a healthy alternative to Froot Loops, and achieves that to a moderate degree.

14. Peach Cheerios

Within this cereal, one finds a fair amount of flavor and peach puree. Like peach crayons, it doesn’t give enough color or anything else you want from peaches.

13. Chocolate Strawberry Cheerios

This limited edition of the great Cheerios franchise, which was released weeks before Valentine's Day 2021, tested how well love could be manufactured in cereal form.

The aroma upon opening the box is so romantic and lovely that a person may want to kiss the nearest person 1,000 times. Hopefully, that person is worthy of the hypnotizing scent.

This cereal possesses a wonderful chocolate flavor. However, since the strawberry aspect is an artificial flavor, it falls short of other Cheerios fruit flavors. Not that you and your partner can't swing your arm around other's in a love bite fashion as if you're eating chocolate strawberries together.

12. Cheerios Oat Crunch Oats 'n' Honey

Did you know there are oats in this cereal? You may also taste honey. The taste is quite juicy and deep, but not as beautiful as the alternative COC flavor.

11. Frosted Cheerios

Cheerios marketers walked into the upper management suite, located the right executive office, pounded the desk (ever so politely) and said they wanted to frost their cereal. So they did with sugar oat bran and corn starch. In order to stay "simply made," as they say, they stuck to that and kept it to nine grams of sugar. The color is solid and frosting complete. Someone ran into the room and said not to let the color fade in milk, so they didn't. See how that works.

No color is lost in milk. A bit of powdered sugar taste hangs in the milk at the end.

10. Pumpkin Spice Cheerios

This is the type when you ask, it says, "I throw straight fastballs."

What else?

"I throw straight curveballs."

This pumpkin spice cereal gives you the pumpkin and the pumpkin spice, coming right at your face with what you want and need. Pumpkin puree coats the stuff while the cinnamon and nutmeg round out the flavor.

As far as pumpkin spice cereals go, it does better than some by working harder.

9. Very Berry Cheerios

This cereal looks and tastes like freckled lemonade. The bar for fruit flavor has been lowered for this in a way it wasn't for most Cheerios products. Instead of various purees, it has powders of blueberry, strawberry, cranberry and raspberry, as well as vegetable and fruit juice. I hope you get all those flavors on your buds. I got two or three. The vitamin content is reasonable because they had to get it in before all the fruit walked away from being powdered.

But they couldn't get acai berry or pomegranate involved, which is too bad.

8. Honey Nut Cheerios Medley Crunch

Let's say I want to have Honey Nut Cheerios and Honey Bunches of Oats in the same bowl, but don't want to put the effort into buying both. Hey, this stuff takes half the shelf space. And it has giant oat blocks. So much variety here. And no lack of honey.

7. Banana Nut Cheerios

At first, when I found this, I thought, Oh, this like if banana Nut bread were cereal, but without the nuts, which I guess is good for some people because having nut in a cereal name is usually a lie, except for people with allergies who have to take everything very seriously because you never can say it wasn't made on the same machinery as something just because of the smell."

Actually, the ingredient list plainly says it has pecan ingredients (not just pecans).

The Cheerios brand is just walking out here informing the world it can beat all the banana-flavored cereals by laying down a bunt. Remember Nilla Banana Pudding Cereal? This stuff doesn't make you gag. Isn't that fun?

Also, it doesn't treat its fruit flavor like a serial killer. There's a reasonable proportion of banana flavor to cinnamon. Meanwhile, Apple Cinnamon Cheerios is not so even.

Apparently, Banana Nut Cheerios appeared before, but it must be better now because of technology, improved weightlifting regimens and other stuff that have generally boosted its athleticism over previous generations.

6. Cheerios Oat Crunch Cinnamon

This cereal is gruff, but not rough. The cinnamon hits you for real, but is balanced with honey, sugar and various grain flavor so that you don't feel overwhelmed. It's also not as hard or thick as other cereals. This justifies having 40 grams of carbohydrates and 14 grams of sugar by boasting four grams of fiber. Oh, and actual flavor, unlike Multigrain Cheerios.

This combines hardiness, taste and adventure in a way matched by few.

5. Maple Cheerios

This was introduced at the peak of fall, just when maple harvesters started thinking about what they probably should be accomplishing (maple season is not when you might expect, as tapping season occurs from February to April). Maple Cheerios slaps your tastebuds hard. No one has ever tasted a fuller, more saturated syrup-flavored cereal. At no point in the bowl does the flavor stop. This is complete, tasty and … healthy.

4. Honey Nut Cheerios

I have probably eaten more than 10,000 bowls of Honey Nut Cheerios in my life. Every single one was honey-smacking and vaguely nutty, leaving behind a respectable honey milk at the end (which the Bible promises in various verses to those who trust in the Lord, ostensibly meaning Honey Nut Cheerios is the cereal sent down from heaven). Honey Nut Cheerios is every bit as healthy and heart-happy as regular Cheerios, but no one ever felt beset by blandness after polishing off a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios.

3. Blueberry Cheerios

Like other real fruit flavors of the Cheerios brand, nothing flavors this but real blueberries (and a couple other natural flavors; believe me they're so natural they'll tell you). This comes at your tongue with thick blueberry taste. Blueberry Pancake Crunch was soft on blueberry aura, while this goes hard. Blueberry Cheerios don’t give up until you give up. Also, it’s truly odiferous. If I weren’t so high on the smell, I’d use a softer adjective.

2. Peanut Butter Chocolate Cheerios

Smoothness and fullness of flavor are values to be demonstrated in a peanut butter chocolate cereal. This stuff has that, unlike Peanut Butter Chocolate Corn Pops (which is a lie, as far as any cereal can be). The chocolate flavor in Peanut Butter Chocolate Cheerios is resonant and blends well with the peanut butter flavor. The cereal goes down easy and can be enjoyed endlessly. No question, you will eat it in the bowl in the morning (but don’t detract from the flavor by pouring chocolate milk on it) and scooping handfuls in the afternoon. Both ways are equally pleasant.

1. Chocolate Cheerios

When General Mills introduced chocolate into Cheerios, it brought love into the world. Chocolate brings character to everything it touches, and it blesses this form of Cheerios in the utmost. No shortcoming in taste can be found. Afterwards, the cereal leaves a milk that is almost as fervent as actual chocolate milk. This cereal was so satisfying that I ate three-quarters of a box on a long drive.

0 notes

conartisthaiji · 7 years

Link

Based off of this AU prompt from Tumblr (and I can’t find the original post with it, sorry): our mutual friend invited us to Thanksgiving dinner and things got a little rowdy and a food fight erupted, and now mashed potatoes and turkey are flying everywhere. But we're hiding under the table sharing a bag of chips I brought along just in case.

Which I intended to write for Hak/Yona, but it somehow ended up being about the Happy Hungry Bunch, plus Lili, Ayura, and Tetora celebrating Thanksgiving together. In a modern AU.

actual fic under cut.

"Yona, Lili, Tetora, we are going to be late!" Ayura yells, annoyance dripping from her voice.

"Lili still needs some help!" Tetora calls back. "Be patient, Ayura! Besides, Yun won't mind."

"I'm coming!" Yona shouts as she carefully slides in the flower clip into her red hair. "Just let me grab my bag!"

She reaches down and snatches up her beaded purse. Her eyes suddenly fall on the bag of chips by her bedside. It's barely been touched-she's eaten maybe three of them??-so she can totally bring it along. This is a potluck, after all.

So Yona snatches it and places it in her bag, then runs out. "I'm here!" she announces to Ayura. "How do I look?"

Ayura smiles. "You look good."

Feet suddenly pound down the hall, interrupting the brief moment silence. Tetora appears first, grinning like a lunatic.

"Ayura, look at how beautiful Lili is!" Tetora squeals with pride as Lili appears in view.

"Lili does look amazing," Ayura concedes. "You did a good job with her makeup."

"Okay! Let's go!" Lili cries. "Into the car, everyone!!"

"Onward!" Yona cries, pointing upward. "Let's go!"

"I call shotgun!" Tetora exclaims gleefully.

"Please just get in the car," Ayura says as she slides into the driver's seat. "And, no, Tetora, it's Lili's turn today, honestly!"

"Ha!!" Lili sticks out her tongue.

Ayura starts the car, and they begin to drive off to Yun's house.

"Wait!" Tetora screeches suddenly, causing Ayura to slam the brake and the car to screech. "We forgot the jello!"

"Damn it!" Ayura wheels the car around (driving too fast for a residential area, honestly). "That took ages to make!"

They reach their apartment and Lili sprints out of the car. She returns, moments later, carrying the platter of cranberry jello. She hops in the car and passes the jello back to Tetora.

"Anything else?" Ayura demands.

"Nope!" Yona says cheerfully, and the car heads off.

They arrive at Yun's house, and noisily pile out of the car. Then, they walk up to the front door, and Yona rings the doorbell. "Hello!" Yun exclaims as he opens the door. "Come in, I'll take that, Tetora." Yun grabs the jello and starts walking to the kitchen. Yona follows, hoping for a snack.

"Yona, snacks are over there, go mingle," Yun grumbles, but not in a mean way. "Kaya brought the extra cheesy goldfish, I know you like those."

"Really? Kaya's here?" Yona asks. "But Yun, seriously, do you need any help?"

"I've got it under control," Yun replies. "But thanks for offering."

Yona nods and joins the rest of the guests in the living room. Just like Yun said, there are three giant cardboard boxes of the extra cheesy goldfish sitting on the living room table, all opened. Yona reaches out and grabs a handful.

"Yona, dear, you look so beautiful," Jae-ha says, pulling her in for a hug. "How are you?"

Yona grins. "Wonderful! How are you, Jae-ha?"

"Beautiful, of course," Jae-ha replies, and tosses his hair just slightly. "So, what have you been up to lately?"

"Just school," Yona admits. "What about you, Jae-ha?"

"Oh, here and there. Wait, Yona, there's someone I want you to meet." Jae-ha looks around, then calls out, "Hak!"

A tall, dark haired man appears, with the look of eternal grumpiness upon his face. "What do you want, Droopy Eyes?"

"Droopy...eyes?" Yona repeats, confused.

"Hak, this is my very dear friend Yona! Yona, this is Hak, who is eternally unpleasant," Jae-ha says. "Yona, I met Hak at work. He's a very nice person, once you get past his rudeness."

"I'm not rude," Hak says. "You're the one who basically attacked me when you first saw me."

"How dare you accuse me of such an ugly action!"

Yona snickers and Hak rolls his eyes at Jae-ha's dramatics.

"Miss!!" Someone slams into her from behind, and Yona stumbles a little.

"Zeno!" Yona laughs as she steadies herself. She can feel Zeno's arms around her. "Don't do that!"

"Haha, Zeno is sorry, Miss!" Zeno barely looks sheepish, and Yona knows that it's futile to ask him to stop hugging her.

"Hello, Yona," Kaya says, appearing next to Zeno. "How are you?"

"Wonderful, how are you?"

"I just got released from the hospital, so pretty wonderful, actually," Kaya replies. She slides an arm around Zeno's waist. "It should be a few weeks before I have to go back."

"And Zeno and Kaya will have a grand time before she does!" Zeno cheers, pulling Kaya in closer. "You should hang out too, Yona. It will be fun-oh, Jae-ha!! Hello!"

Both Yona and Kaya hold back snorts as Zeno practically flings himself at Jae-ha, who easily hugs Zeno right back.

"Zeno, you should meet Hak," Jae-ha says. "Hak-huh? Where'd he-HAK!"

"I was talking to White Snake," Hak mutters as he appears. "What do you want now?"

"Hak, this is Zeno and Kaya. Zeno, Kaya, this is Hak," Jae-ha announces.

"Hello!" Yona greets Hak, who nods in return.

"Jae-ha, the room isn't too large and there's not that many people, you don't have to yell," a white haired man says, scoldingly. "Hak is perfectly capable of hearing you if you spoke normally."

"Kija-"

"Kija! I didn't know you'd be here!" Zeno exclaims.

"Hi, Zeno, hello, Kaya," Kija greets. "Hello, Yona."

"You didn't tell me that you knew Yun!" Yona says. "Wow. So many wonderful people are here tonight, I'm so lucky-"

"EVERYONE!!" Yun suddenly shouts, and the room falls silent. "Food is that way! Please sit down!"

"Yes, Mother," Jae-ha snarks, and both Kija and Hak smack him.

"I don't remember giving birth to you Jae-ha!!!"

"What? I certainly did not say anything of the sort," Jae-ha gasps, mock offended.

"You did," Kija mutters as they all move to the table.

Yona sits next to Shin-ah, who has brought Ao, his pet squirrel, to the party.

"Hello, Shin-ah, hello, Ao!" Yona chirps. "How are you?"

"Pikyuu~" Ao squeaks, smiling up at Yona. She seems to beam from her perch on Shin-ah's shoulder.

Shin-ah offers a smile at Yona, and Yona beams even more.

"I told you cranberry jello was unnecessary!" Tetora cries, amidst the chaos, and Yona snickers.

"It's Thanksgiving!" Ayura shoots back.

"There are French fries!" Tetora retorts.

"Okay, so we're the only ones who got the memo that it's Thanksgiving!"

"Someone brought stew!"

"Would everyone shut up and sit down and eat?!" Yun bellows. Ayura and Tetora guiltily drop into some empty seats. "Also, I made the stew."

Tetora looks a little more embarrassed at that.

"Shin-ah, what did you bring?" Yona asks, as she helps herself to some of the French fries. The buzz of chatter quickly picks up again.

"Fruit salad," Shin-ah replies softly.

"Ah, I will definitely try it!" Yona then turns to her left, where Kaya is. "Kaya, Yun said you brought the goldfish?"

"Yes, and Zeno and I also brought caramel corn," Kaya replies. "Give me some fruit salad when it gets here, please?"

"Of course," Yona says.

There's plenty of light-hearted chatter as everyone helps themselves to the numerous dishes on the table. Yona tells Kaya-and Zeno, by extension, as he sits next to Kaya-about the events of the past two weeks, as Kaya had been in the hospital, and Zeno had spent most of those two weeks by Kaya's side. Shin-ah occasionally corrects Yona when she messes up the details, but overall, it is a good system.

"TAKE THAT BACK, JAE-HA!" Lili shouts suddenly, standing up and pointing a fork-with a half-eaten chicken nugget on it-at Jae-ha. "GUEN-TAE IS A VERY BEAUTIFUL MAN!"

"Eh, he's alright," Jae-ha says. "But Lili, darling, you could do so much better."

"No!! Guen-tae is perfect and wonderful!" Lili retorts, waving her fork dramatically. "You who speak of beauty, should know that!"

The chicken nugget flies off her fork and lands on Kija's head.

"Guen-tae isn't single, Lili," Jae-ha says, rather condescendingly.

As he finishes the sentence, Kija throws the chicken nugget at Lili's face, and hits her square on the cheek.

"You-" Lili gasps and whirls around to face Kija, who seems to realize that he's made a terrible mistake.

"ZENO LOVES FOOD FIGHTS!" Zeno shouts, and throws his French fries in the air.

The room descends into chaos as everyone starts hurling their food at each other. Yona swings her plate around, watching as food flies off of it. Ayura and Tetora grab the jello, cut it in half, and then they slam one half into Kija's face, and other onto Jae-ha's. Shin-ah and Ao throw nuts at everyone. Kaya and Zeno gleefully fling their food-and plates-into the air. Kija dumps the entire bowl of stew on Jae-ha, who retaliates by grabbing the mostly empty bowl and dropping it on Kija's head. Lili flings fruit in a gigantic circle.

Yona gasps as she dives to avoid a strawberry. The table shakes, and her arm sweeps out and knocks over a glass water cup, which in turn topples its neighbors. They topple over, one at a time, water spilling over the tablecloth and falling to the floor-

She gasps as one cup rolls and then lands on the floor, bouncing a little, before it settles down. Yona bends down, and freezes when she sees the long crack now decorating the glass.

"Oh no oh no," she whispers, panicked. "Yun's going to be so mad!"

She grabs her purse and dives under the table. If she pretends she hid as soon as Zeno first threw the fries, then perhaps Yun won't be mad...at her.

"Hello," Hak grumbles, and Yona jumps. "Hiding?"

"Hak! You scared me!" Yona complains. "But yeah, it's so...insane...out there."

The two of them sit in silence, huddled under the table and listening to their friends' insane yelling and screaming. Yona slowly pulls out the bag of chips from her purse and eats one.

"You have chips?" Hak asks.

"Yup! In case of an emergency," Yona replies. "Want some?"

"Sure." Hak reaches out and grabs a few. "So. Yona. How long have you known Yun?"

"I've known him for what feels like forever," Yona says. "He's been like a brother, or really, a mother. I have Ayura and Tetora now, because...well, they're old enough to take care of me, I guess. But Yun has always been around ever since...well. Since as long as I can remember, I suppose." She turns to Hak. "How do you know Yun?"

Hak slowly crunches on some chips before answering. "I moved here recently, after my best friend and roommate turned out to be a murderer. Droopy Eyes was the overenergetic beauty store salesman that White Snake, my new roommate, was crushing on, and so obviously we had to go to the mall practically every day. Droopy Eyes and White Snake introduced me to Yun, and Zeno, and Shin-ah, but never you."

"Ah, Kija said he wanted me to meet you," Yona admits. "But there was never a good time, I suppose."

"Yeah..." Hak says. "So. Lili, Ayura, and Tetora. How do you know them?"

"Lili is my cousin! Ayura is her older sister, and Tetora is her girlfriend," Yona explains. "They took me in after...um." Yona pauses, for the memories, despite being old, are still painful. "After my father died."

Hak is quite for a moment, and the two of them eat chips for a little longer, listening to the sounds of the food fight.

"My parents are dead," Hak tells her. "I never knew them. I suppose it's-"

"YOU BLOODY SHITS!!!" Yun bellows.

"Hak, where did Yun go?" Yona whispers as silence settles over everyone.

"He had to use the restroom," Hak replies, also whispering.

"I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS MESS! I STEP OUT TO USE THE RESTROOM AND WHEN I COME BACK, YOU HAVE MANAGED TO START A FOOD FIGHT!"

"Zeno started it!" Lili shouts.

"No, it was you!" Kija snarls.

"Zeno apologizes for declaring it a food fight," Zeno announces. "But Lili threw her food, which landed on Kija, who then retaliated. And Zeno declared it a food fight."

"What a pain," Yun mutters. "Hey, where's Hak and Yona?" Yona looks at Hak, who shrugs and takes a another chip from her bag.

"Under the table," Shin-ah remarks.

"We have chips," Yona declares as she crawls out. "Come on, Hak, let's join the rest of them."

Hak grudgingly follows Yona out from under the table.

"What a pain," Yun groans again. "Ugh. Well, come on, let's just order pizza."

Everyone cheers.

"Also, help me clean up!" Yun calls as he disappears to order the pizza.

"By the way," Yona says, turning to Hak. "Do you think I could have your number?"

Hak seems to blush a little. Curious. "Sure," he mutters, and pulls out his phone. "Here, add yourself."

Yona grins and hands him her phone. "Okay, done," she says when her contact's been added. "I look forward to meeting you in the future, Hak."

Hak smiles. "Yeah. Yeah, that'll be good."

"By the way, if any of you start throwing the pizza I will kick all of you out!"

"Yes, Mother," everyone says, chastised. Even Hak and Yona say it, despite having spent most of the time under the table.

"I don't recall giving birth to you all!!"

#akatsuki no yona #my fic

1 note · View note

glopratchet · 4 years

Text

astryl-wondering

of astryl wylde, with an axe in hand, he begins to cut his way through the tent until he reaches a man with long black hair and piercing eyes and you can see that he has been transformed into a succubus by the hands of the journalist in an awful grin paired up with a toothy hissing but of course astryl is more than satisfied don't forget because hes a succubus a palace compared the rest of astokah's camp which is pretty awful red and orange as you would expect, it's not just that its headquarters for astokahn's rebellion but also astryl succubus activity and act as great examples of mass hysteria and the nature of astokahn: You see a painting which shows the creature described to you before: the succub not gone, just replaced by the lab again The tentacles waving around are now wet with It's lying on a metal, dissection table He heres the voice of the succubus and the incubus sing in his mind One high, one low He ignores the voice like he always does They call him all the time He never listens but, if he did You stare at a piece of newspaper from five years ago, smack dab in the center You can sense a group soon Something moves in the corner of his eye he checks it with his camera He pans over a burnt teddy bear, lying on the floor It looks almost brand new he looks through the footage again Something, amidst the static, moves slightly in the middle of the far left hallway dave begins to regret his selfish decisions and pines for the succubi to fuse into a lovely woman that he can mate with and live a normal life without threats who doesn't notice or at least doesn't respond Scanning the room from left to right the succubus finally notices astryl but still unknown to a man named irmcip who is a key supporter of the movement His hand presses down on the bear That moment, he thinks back to his college years Especially music a calloused hand slams down on the bear's head and nothing seems out of the ordinary that has majority of the camp in a lockdown Nothing unusual once again Hey, It seems like things that don't happen are being blocked more now 's databanks The technical er are trying to take measures They are definitely tricky to catch Except when they finally catch wind of being chased by these odd, One attempt nearly caused a system reset The program is instated unknown on what purpose It states irmcip the rest is a fat list of unknowns and corrupted entries The first thing cludstrum notices is that most of the names on the page are most likely dman, unrecognizable, or various other s that are unidentifiable Other than old hangups clapping each other on the backs for winsome trumpet licks the only sound is that of without doing any damaged so they may need a processor to play instead with less then a 25% humidity making geomagnetic levels of if they decide to make homeis here It seems the other bands havent given this a thought and just bring large pieces of electronics When the jixel ersp dont wory the drives will wait but appears to be executing a play by play of an unknown opera Mirror display time lapse converters will have to do a large sweep of the but cannot seem to introspect much further as the He debates if he should go see how the score is playing out anytime now finally, the band stops dead in their tracks The displays of the clock at various places in his media bank all say they are permanently stuck at 4: the fix He cannot begin Sudddenly all the melted bits of the books have been pushed out and a new order is leading everything Running countless tests on the projector shows one thing and cylopiean anglyk's son and daughter Each time he eats something from a machine the numbers will change randomly on the screen eggs, bags of chips, bananas, gold and aluminum As he fixes the bugs the trade-ins are lost The work Only pre-ets are mentioned in test menus 's room he finds He is pretty sure that there is nothing poisonous in the decayed pile he is surrounded by It probably will not degrade any of the debris in his mouth He pulls colors out of the things he imbies into his skull usually it changes the color and there appear to get very hot Most flavors are useable for trade-ins but astyrl finds certain ones to be just wrong Considering his new beliefs all fresh food makes him sick so he just went back to mindlessly trading off objects in his scape or drink here anyway jelly and corn cobbettes he thinks but save on the volume of liquid he might have to All the fresh food looks so inviting It is probably sound bytes of the practice crowd cheering that are begging him to eat these things being tempted by fresh foods there is also some talk about a basic corn cob trade this planet His final ending is one of protecting all life from cludstrum himself! the war torn city of Newyork The whole place got really destroyed and they have not even refillied the places with impliments of war the desert Oasis When approaching it the oasis lights up and makes a loud noise "what do you want out of life kid? the russian gulag it just looks like a big mansion and the scary part is that russians can wear bullet proof clothing the sounds of the night spring to life "Times up, the NEW world order begins now! cluldrum will start the end of the world It is up to you to stop it! -"wait, I explored a corn-field? The hummmmm of multiple machines of unknown intent To the west dark-skinned creatures lighting a signal fire arms breaks his fall from the snap decision to somersault off of the bridge into the large black piles of debris, This crumpled and sharp metal scape was once towering skyscrapers Look for hazards! Melt into the surroundings! camouflage- dark colors with dark backround periodically between the wind and exhaustion It looks like a glowing space station that fell to earth your brain as you start to see double vision! The rumbling of multiple creature movements on the other side into the fetal position "You are joking me "Breathing coarse in is face in complete darkness your distant impotent blowing out your flickering candlelight! You are standing just outside the ten radius of pitch black up in a pile of smoldering dead bodies Going back to the tent might be a good option the tent with a bone chilling howl The Sun is trying to peak through the giant dusty clouds but they refuse to budge to starve himself warner brothers releasing the "Helicopter sequence" cartoon the seven-year locusts arrive at your campsite! fast-food free elite "butterfly" robots to ; (un)wash your windows, clean, do chores Wake up creep! on the test monkey The massacred slave's head is detached inventing warrning! Kludstrm foul monkey graffiti is scaring away customers himself from the heat the temperature plummets! flowering "Coca-Cola" trees raining delicious caffeine from heaven you try to sleep! and tracking an exited feral cat the brutal smelling invaders advance! Mckinley overpriced and double bagging it they suck! messages into the dusty ground astrly mocking your moral views, beliefs, and goals A mixture of nightmare creatures beats and claws at your brain peta-vandal video feed warning! Four horsemen of the apocalypse dumping phosgene gas on civilian's below a crusade to foreign lands and forcing conversion The united civil assistance unions begin assaults at your authority the lives of those you've already sentenced to death Quick, create a social-based hierarchy ! Objections? Excuse me sir? the torn out portion of this tent mckinley coward hiding behind the law that you created for him off the bottom of this tent The top of the tent is rip open releasing the internal air pressure while fiddling with tweezers they just stole David's stone! Kludstrm obvious creating permanent wall that no one can cross spectacular as she bit into a bloody chunk of your heart You try to create something stunningly beautiful with common, and unnoticed items your eyes to see the truth about Kludstrm leather in the sun Wow! The acid sure has given Astryl a scarily slender figure your own content on the web! Screaming loud enough makes Kludstrm go away! enemies and exits look at Kludstrrmtmcidotmyebiemamehtselrihepgufhhh's comments 5 minutes later You now fear Astryl! There's no turning back this time you of incoming flesh-eating murderers your weird brain you hear Kludstrm's voice coming out of your mouth ammo exploding bullets sabotage! Astryl loco plotting against you mutating peanuts You wake up gasping for air you with the tent ! His eyes are now two black abysses peering deep into your soul The tent collapses under its own weight terrorists with laser lights With all your force, you crash an empty bottle over his head on bones you found outside The air around Kludstrm shimmers And he's gone! your subscriber's money on booze and wenches Desperate, you try to rip the wood walls out of the ground and bash in your own brains the storms coming from the west your heartbeat to a beat You can't stop staring at the inverted moon their favorite tune You play thes most terrible song in the world! klatu barada niktu! to make way for the dark The following program is not suitable for children, or adults of loose moral standing! Expect the unexpected Underground reporter SV7 broadcasting "live" as usual The northern dwarf plains fell yesterday to unknown attackers GalapadeparfwaatyzonebattlegroundDDDDD! The city of beauteous stranger's circus GalapadeparfwaatyzonecongressSSSSSS! Threatlevel increase in sector 7G! GalapadeparfwaatyzonecommitteeLLLLLL! The city of beetriot glass fragile average humidity 73% windspeed 17 knots storm approaching from the west visibility 3 miles UV level: unendurable Galapadeparfwaatyzoneincominghostilities! The city of beetriot reptilian incredible external temperature: atmosphere made up of 9% oxygen and 12% pollution

0 notes

statusreview · 6 years

Text

Fourth of July Party Recipes, Ideas, & General Insanity

Every year on Instagram Stories I share photos from our friend’s insanely over-the-top party for the Fourth of July. And each year we gets tons of requests for a post with all the photos and links to the recipes she uses, so we’re finally giving the people what they want. Our friend Justine has been hosting these backyard soirees for years – and the only way to describe them would be: EXTRA. And we love her for it. She and her husband John basically just throw this huge party every year for all of us to gather and hang out with our kids and each other. It’s such a great time of year to get together (not as hard with schedules as things around the holidays for example) and when the party ends, her prep for the following year begins. Just kidding. But maybe not…

Let’s dive right in. Each year she sets up a sun tent and decorates it to create a makeshift photo booth with some fabric, sparkly red tulle, and a banner along the back.

Now lean into your screen and really soak up this next sentence, because the success of a DIY photobooth hinges on this single solitary tip: SHE HAS THE BEST PROPS. Every July there are more of them on the little table off to the side for us to choose from. This year there were wigs and beards in addition to all of the oversized glasses and hats and giant inflatable gloves. She says whenever she sees something on sale after the 4th she grabs it for next year, so that’s how the collection keeps growing.

It should come as no surprise to longtime readers that Justine is the one who, instead of a traditional baby gift, offered to make the cupcakes for our daughter’s 4th birthday party (just a few weeks after our son was born). She turned out the most amazing stack of custom decorated treats. BECAUSE SHE ONLY HAS ONE PARTY MODE AND IT’S BEAST MODE. Which explains why she can’t resist large inflatable presidents to greet guests on the hanging daybed on her back porch, for example.

Yes, all of the kids tackled them and smacked each other with them in the yard. And yes it was hilarious.

She also made this cute wooden sign a few years ago that comes out each July. It says things like “food”, “waterslide”, “drinks”, “photobooth”, etc. Are you thinking “this party is almost like a wedding!” – because if so, you are starting to get it. It has snowballed, so every year she has so many things to break out that feel festive and hilarious and even more over the top than the year before. At this point the party momentum cannot be stopped and can only be appreciated with an Abraham-Lincoln hat-tip, which of course is on the prop table.

Speaking of fun, she always rents a two story waterslide for the kids (and the adults, once we have enough jello shooters) because… well, SHE IS THAT DEDICATED TO FUN. The waterslide really takes things to the next level when you record slow-mo videos of other adults attempting tricks like barrel rolls and flips. Five stars, would recommend.

As for other things to do, there are epic cornhole tournaments – and in case it wasn’t obvious, much like Puffy demands that everyone wear white to his parties, Justine demands that we wear red, white, and blue to her gathering each year. There’s even a series of prizes for certain costume categories (we had a big winner in our family this year when it came to an extremely patriotic swimsuit & towel combo).

This is Justine-the-host’s outfit. THAT’S AT LEAST FIVE HUNDRED FLAIR POINTS, GUYS. She decorated those flip-flips herself with ribbon. I know. Commitment level: 1000.

There’s also a leather sofa in the middle of the grass. Obviously for photo ops and general hanging out. It’s pretty much full of people the entire night long. It also makes for a great place to spectate/heckle the cornhole players.

Justine also does things like rolling silverware in bandanas and tying them with twine BECAUSE THAT’S WHO SHE IS AS A PERSON. She actually confessed to me that each year she has a ton of these left over, so they’re not that high maintenance. Note: her definition of high maintenance might be slightly different than other people’s based on her ALL IN level of party-throwing.

The food is always fun and we actually do a pot luck thing so it’s not too much on Justine & John’s shoulders. We each bring a side dish for everyone to share and meat for our own family for the grill. Also, note the sock and shoe combination here. Just saying. We do not mess around when it comes to our costumes.

Since around 20-30 people come each year, there’s always a giant amount of food – and a lot of it ends up being themed. Blue corn chips with red salsa for example, or this bean dip with little olives and tomatoes to make a flag (it’s just a layer of refried beans, a layer of guacamole, a layer of cheese, and a layer of sour cream with the tomatoes and olives on top).

These mozzarella, basil, and tomato skewers are another example of the good eats that feel sort of themed (the blueberries add some blue, right?). Add some salt and pepper, drizzle them with balsamic glaze, and thank me later ;)

We always bring what I affectionately call “pigs in a blanket,” which I’ve learned are called “Lil’ Smokies” here in Virginia. Still getting used to that name. The kids love them though – they’re always completely gone by the end of the night.

The drinks are also, to borrow a term from Lil’ Wayne: “off the chain.” These are jello shooters, for example – and the cherry is so clever because if you pull the stem it lifts the shooter out of the cup so you can suck it down and remark how amazing the hostess is. Here is a kid-friendly recipe without any alcohol (just add vodka if you want them to be true jello shots).

Justine also made these awesome red, white, and blue smoothies for the kids – all of whom raved about them except for one non-fruit-loving child. Let the record state that cute straws and the little jelly jars are the key to a ridiculous amount of serving flare, so do with that information what you will.

And you can’t have a big ol’ gathering without red, white, and blue margaritas for the grown ups. It should be noted that because I helped in the kitchen, these weren’t as beautiful as they should have been. We think if we added more ice to thicken them that the red, white, and blue layers would have been more distinct. But as Justine’s husband John so eloquently stated, “we were going for margarita speed over margarita perfection.” Here’s the recipe for ya.

One of the biggest reveals of the night (there are usually 3-5 of these surprises because JUSTINE DOES NOT MESS AROUND) were these waffle cones that she had individually decorated with red white and blue melted chocolate and sprinkles. THE KIDS WENT HAM FOR THESE.

Also, I thought her use of the teal blue milk crates was so adorable and asked if she saw that on Pinterest and she said she had been standing in her daughter’s room and looked at them and thought “those would be perfect for my cones!” which floored me. I mean this woman clearly has her own version of Pinterest running in her brain 24/7.

One other thing on the menu that I would definitely highly recommend was this amazing dessert called “Berry Lasagne” that Justine whipped up:

Yes, that’s a white chocolate drizzle that she added right before bringing it out. And let the record state that any party that required me to drizzle white chocolate during the actual party would lead to me breathing into a paper bag in the kitchen, but Justine just has that party expert gene. Here’s the recipe for the berry lasagne, and here’s a shot of it all sliced and served on a patriotic plate:

After all the food and drinks (and competitive watersliding), we gather on the back porch and the patio to watch the fireworks that Justine’s husband John takes a ton of pride in.

Every year they get bigger and more insane (they’re legal here in Virginia for all of the Northerners wondering – I had to get used to that when I moved to VA). There’s always a fire extinguisher nearby and it only had to be used one epic time when the table very slowly caught fire after the fireworks ended.

So that’s Justin & John’s completely over-the-top and SO MUCH FUN annual party. Hope the recipes and photos come in handy for anyone else who is walking around with their own personal Pinterest running through their brain. I always get a little mushy during the fireworks because it’s so rare to get together with friends and family that you love – so it’s such a treat to have these awesomely festive and completely committed friends to get us all in one place to enjoy each other’s company every year. WE LOVE YOU J&J! Thanks for ALL THE MEMORIES (and all the photobooth props).

P.S. Wanna see the most extra thing I’ve ever done for a patriotic party? Here’s a watermelon trick I learned years ago (John looks like a baby in that first picture).

P.P.S. Did you know that we send out what basically ends up being a bonus blog post each week?! Sign up for our free weekly emails to get them delivered right to your inbox.

The post Fourth of July Party Recipes, Ideas, & General Insanity appeared first on Young House Love.

Fourth of July Party Recipes, Ideas, & General Insanity published first on https://ssmattress.tumblr.com/

0 notes

endlessarchite · 6 years

Text

Fourth of July Party Recipes, Ideas, & General Insanity

Let’s dive right in. Each year she sets up a sun tent and decorates it to create a makeshift photo booth with some fabric, sparkly red tulle, and a banner along the back.

Yes, all of the kids tackled them and smacked each other with them in the yard. And yes it was hilarious.

She also made this cute wooden sign a few years ago that comes out each July. It says things like “food”, “waterslide”, “drinks”, ��photobooth”, etc. Are you thinking “this party is almost like a wedding!” – because if so, you are starting to get it. It has snowballed, so every year she has so many things to break out that feel festive and hilarious and even more over the top than the year before. At this point the party momentum cannot be stopped and can only be appreciated with an Abraham-Lincoln hat-tip, which of course is on the prop table.

This is Justine-the-host’s outfit. THAT’S AT LEAST FIVE HUNDRED FLAIR POINTS, GUYS. She decorated those flip-flips herself with ribbon. I know. Commitment level: 1000.

One other thing on the menu that I would definitely highly recommend was this amazing dessert called “Berry Lasagne” that Justine whipped up:

After all the food and drinks (and competitive watersliding), we gather on the back porch and the patio to watch the fireworks that Justine’s husband John takes a ton of pride in.

P.S. Wanna see the most extra thing I’ve ever done for a patriotic party? Here’s a watermelon trick I learned years ago (John looks like a baby in that first picture).

P.P.S. Did you know that we send out what basically ends up being a bonus blog post each week?! Sign up for our free weekly emails to get them delivered right to your inbox.

The post Fourth of July Party Recipes, Ideas, & General Insanity appeared first on Young House Love.

Fourth of July Party Recipes, Ideas, & General Insanity published first on https://bakerskitchenslimited.tumblr.com/

0 notes

truereviewpage · 6 years