#thoughts and hugot

[alysswrites]

crying, cuz u know, tired pf wprk, tired of life, tired of pleasing everyone 😴

#driedtears #random #hiddengrays #random thoughts #thoughts #thoughts and hugot

[sketchypanda]

Ayus lang maging malungkot, malugmok, at mawalan ng pag-asa. Gumawa ng mga bagay na irrasyonal na walang kahit ano mang pag aalinlangan at 'di kailangan magpasensya. Walang masama na tumigil at lasapin ang kasalukuyan, mag karoon ng kahinaan, at maging tao.

#album art #luna #the moon #night sky #photo manipulation #absurd #sakura #cherry blossom #astronaut #stars #galaxy #inspiration #life quote #quotes #tagalog #hugot quotes #thoughts and hugot #life qoute #filipino

[heymemae]

Wounds from the past contemplating a new beginning.

#heymemae #collection of my thoughts #realization #poetry #relationship #poem #alone with my thoughts #poems #love #pain #quotes #thoughts and hugot #alone #heartbreak #collectingmyownthoughts #reality #letting go #anxitey #trauma

[barakongpilipina]

Them: Masaya ka pa ba?

Me: *humagulgol ng iyak*

#personal #diary #thoughts #thoughts and hugot #random

[somewhereyouexpecttofindme]

Learning How To Cross Ramos Street

“I’m ready, Where is he?”

He was right there beside me, talking to me. The first real conversation we’ve had the whole day. Today was the day he stepped into my world, or rather, a version of it. In a few months, he’d have his own way of viewing this world. But for the first time, we were finally on the same plane. The world seemed to melt away leaving just the two of us walking side by side, like always.

‘I said something funny. He laughed.’

God! I love that laugh. It reminded me of happy times, of make believe worlds and adventures. It took me back to sober parties on the beach and reckless food dares. Reminded me of the sweet sound of my childhood. A happy place that never seemed to have any problems. A shallow pond i have never found depth in. It was like many things I liked, an escape.

‘And together. We journeyed forth.’

We were always together. From the moment we met, we were bound. Comfortable to the point of routine. Because in this space that we’ve created for ourselves, we never go any deeper than what we are used to. We were friends. Nothing more, nothing less.

‘We stopped’

As much as I wanted more, I could never have him in the way I wanted him. He has never turned my way. I’ve always just been the friend, the sister. I always feel like the one going after him. Always the one seeking. Always the one putting the effort to start the conversation. He always was the one to ditch first. I wondered, what if I stopped?

‘And looked at each other’

Looking at him was like staring through a one way mirror. In which, I could see him but he can’t see me. Our friendship was never natural to begin with. We were unnaturally thrust together, always forced to be paired. If given the chance to pick someone else he would never choose me. He chooses to walk with me out of obligation, when all I want to be is a choice.

‘We said goodbye.’

In an alternate world, I would have asked him to stay. He would have taken my hand and squeezed it as if he wanted me just as much as I wanted him. I would have kissed his cheek and appreciated the glorified look of surprise on his face. He would have given me a rare smile in return.

‘And we parted ways. Both of us headed to opposite directions but ironically still crossing the same street.’

If we had never met, we would have never been friends. He was just too cool for me and I was someone who just blended into the background. Its like that movie. I feel like we’re both part of one large comet both headed in the same direction until a part splits away and falls to earth by the pull of gravity. I’ve fallen. Now, I watch him leave me behind.

‘I looked left and watched him cross the street the same time I did.’

He would always be one of my greatest what ifs. I watched as he crossed the street a few cars away and wondered why I hadn’t crossed the street with him and delayed our farewell. But I knew it wasn’t fair to myself to keep hoping where my feelings were not returned. Its better to end things now then hurt more later. We would have said goodbye anyways. It was then that I decided it was time to move on and cross the road. Alone.

‘I looked towards the right, away from him. Hoping, praying, that he would see me and wonder if he should have crossed the road with me instead.’

#unrequited love #short story #trying to move on #thoughts and hugot #leaving this here

[justnoone04]

Ito na naman yung pakiramdam na ayoko maramdaman.

#thoughts and hugot

[r3v3r1e]

12:03 am. Tuesday. November 1. I have just turned 42.

A lot has happened that I have wanted to write about but just wasn’t able to for various reasons, but mostly because I just couldn’t find the time or the words.

One of the biggest and most recent events in my life was leaving my former company.

December 22, 2021, was my last day with a company I worked with for 10 years. They were mostly good years, some even great. I learned a lot during my stay and I loved what I did.

But, not unlike romantic relationships, I found something else. A side job instead of a side piece.

It’s funny looking at it from that perspective given that something similar happened in my marriage.

I don’t know if it was my personal relationship that echoed in my professional relationship, or if my professional relationship mirrored my marriage.

Whichever way it was, my husband found a side piece and I ended up with a side job. His side piece left, and in the middle of figuring out whether we will pick up the pieces or just move on from each other altogether, I found a side job.

He was repentant and wanted to work on our marriage. I decided to leave a company I have been loyal to for 10 years.

These events didn’t happen side by side. My husband came out with his affair a year or so before I started moonlighting.

But it’s funny how in both situations I felt my world explode and crumble around me. It was the same process of deciding whether to stay or let go, which pieces to keep or throw away.

In both times, there was the same doubt and fear: what if it doesn’t work out? What if I am left empty-handed?

The same questions my husband asked himself while he was debating whether to keep his new love or stay with the old are the same questions I asked myself before deciding to leave my former company.

It’s been a year since I left and it’s been several years since his affair.

There have been changes in our dynamics. Our relationship is pretty much the same as it was, but there is now a recognition that we are no longer the people we were at the start of our relationship. We have grown.

Today, I am 42. I have grown from and learned much from both experiences.

Life is not any more difficult or easier than it has been before, and I am thankful that I am still here, trying to make the best of it.

I am grateful for the mundane and the day-to-day, as I am for the special and the extraordinary.  

I am thankful more than ever to the people that are still with me, despite all that I am not. My often wayward husband included.

Today, I Drink Wine.

#notes to self #birthday #birthday post #words of mine #words to myself #adele #i drink wine #thoughts and hugot #thoughts #my thougts #hugot #hugotpamore #what i learned #writers on tumblr

[ladysirenofaretuza]

#thoughts and hugot #my poem #hugot feels

[moon-stars-and-ink]

Bianca Sparacino, The Strength In Our Scars

#spilled words #spilled ink #poetry #poem #poets corner #poemsdaily #life lessons #life #life quotes #spilled thoughts #hugot #words #bianca sparacino

[inevitablefeelingsforyou]

Meeting you will always be my favorite memory, but you being a memory will always break my heart.

#sad love quote #love #love quotes #love quote tumblr #relationship quotes #love quote #quote #quoteoftheday #relationship #deep quotes #deep thoughts #pinoy hugot #pinoy quote

[dumbasswildsouuul]

"WALANG PERMANENTE, HALOS LAHAT PANSAMANTALA"

#tagalog #prsnl #thoughts #personal #hugot #patama #masakit #one liner #mahal #pinoy

[alysswrites]

I just have to remember that I was just used to his advantage and already forgotten. I have to suck it up.

#driedtears #hiddengrays #2021 #thoughts and hugot

[freddekoko]

Yung Pebrero na pero nakatayo pa rin ang aming Christmas Tree, hindi dahil sa tinatamad akong tanggalin, masaya lang kz sa pakirandam na nakikita ang Paskong

#thoughts #notes #philippines #filipino #hugot #tagalog #ofw

[heymemae]

It took me a while to go back to our old favorite spot. I remember those times when you and I are still in love with each other.

#heymemae #collection of my thoughts #poetry #realization #poem #relationship #alone with my thoughts #poems #love #pain #quotes #thoughts and hugot #alone #heartbreak #collectingmyownthoughts #reality #anxitey #letting go

[barakongpilipina]

Christmas is getting sadder and sadder every year.

#personal #diary #thoughts #thoughts and hugot #christmas #holidays #holiday season #christmas season

[istariray23hugotlines]

#hugot #hugot quotes #hugot feels #hugotquotes #hugot101 #istariray23hugot #hugotfeels #hugotpamore #hugotlines #istariray23hugotlines #positivity #positive mental attitude #positivevibes #positive quotes #positive thoughts #positive affirmations #positive thinking #positive energy #positive mindset #positive