Bernard is one of the few people just as absolutely unhinged as Tim is and I think that's the beauty of their relationship.
Tim paid an actor to be his uncle to avoid getting adopted, broke into Batman's house as a preteen to insist he take on another Robin, got his parents sent into the witness protection program because he messed with the penguin, and once called a bothersome knot in his shoelaces "an evil entity," then questioned where his pocket knife was so he could chop it off.
Bernard had been making deals with organ pirates on the black market at age sixteen, has the wildest conspiracy theories on Earth, casually asked his newly resurrected friend if he could be her "superhero manager" and if she could give him powers like five minutes after she held him hostage and nearly killed him, got himself roped into a pain cult somehow, knows how to hold his own alongside a trained vigilante, and openly hit on Tim's stepmom right in front of him and his dad.
Truly relationship goals.
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while I think that if I were to cook up an actual riordanverse x dc AU I’d have Tim as a son of Bellona I also think he could be a son of Hades (bc Bernard is a son of Apollo through and through and I live for Solangelo and Timber parallels)
I just imagine Janet and Jack having a fling with a rich guy when they’re away at an archeological dig site in Greece and then Janet becomes pregnant and they have Tim. neither of them think too much of it, don’t consider that it may have been the mysterious rich guy but business is booming and their digs are great (though it’s a lot of skeletons for some reason…)
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ok so because timber as jack hunter and eric matthews won't leave my mind:
bernard -> eric matthews
distinguished bi energy
often seen as the comic relief of the friend group
sometimes even as 'the dumb one'
is actually pretty smart in subjects of interest
"personal space, what personal space?"
saying some random shit out of nowhere
abandonment issues hidden underneath everything
very expressive (quite theatrical even)
love language being touch
tim -> jack hunter
supposedly the normal one
(not even by a mile)
loaded but isn't exactly flashy about it
down to earth most of the time
clearly bi but in denial (at first)
step/adoptive siblings
high int low wis
especially if the other is involved (all remaining braincells cease to exist if combined)
deeply fond despite pretending to be annoyed
"and no matter what crazy things he says or does, i still like him. god help me, i still like him."
believes he's got great dating skills (he does not)
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Also making a collection of secret bosses. Why? Because I felt like it.
Let me know who I'm missing, and if possible, getting sprites would be nice so I can add them to the chart!
I'll try to add credits here, let me know what I should add/fix
Jevil/Spamton by Toby Fox
Snow-E by Lemonemy
Gospell design by Scratch Lunin
Blookette by Evil Nya Nya [@SmoochaGhost2 on twitter]
Sunsette & Cressette by Snokie
Wicker/Varminter/Gatsby/Jack/Helios/Nova (But Cooler) by Astromity
Will-fye by Spoon-Breaker
Collage/Stanley P. Scribbleton/Greas-E/Buzzkill/Dr. Pox by IndieMedley
Rublaad by imaginary-regret-608
Banner/Vangel/Haxter by Shaz0s
Halojack/Beltrowel/Gauze by Huecycles
Flowery/Descora & Belle/Atlas by Anne/Bepceleste
Host by Ne0nwithazero
Brandal/Screepto/Fakeris by LocalH00ligan
Radiola by Modtro64
Timber/Starlet/Screamo/Camellia/Wilter/Hycrisik/Mantle Keeper/Hex by R. V. Pine
Sleek by Axniety
Nova by Marnielovesyou
Skuntle Bingoid by ImpactWinter
Tenna by tvlandofficial
RErunner/Lustrelocks/Astrochew by HogRidah
Jukdyne/Dooblod/Terry Crow by RoxRox
Gygar by Rocco
Mederial by PomPom
Nonbinary Secret Boss by Furkrum (I thought it was funny)
Stern by JustTheMoonz
Rachel by R. T. Oak
The Neighbor/Mizpelt/Eve/Gilmore/Kass Sheere/Antoinette/Rock-E/Herifix/Honeur Able/Bellamy/Teel da Eel/Subject_17 by Creepa-Bot Inc.
Dirk/Serif by Emihead
Memme by DELTARUNE Chapters
Glonk by 4chan
Emeraldo by Parkerino69
Micheal Sperour/Shuebert/Min-E by l1zardart1stre
Woostern/BONSLICK THE WICKED/Sonatta/Shikari/Quiddo/Left-E by Mercair
Petaly by Jas
Deadeye by CondorCrest
Vee Sal by Sandshrewdoodle
Verre Trempe by Checherex
Rosey the Rose/Nightmar-E/Orbead by GoYourOwnWay196
Mad Hatter by Scare
Cabelle/Blanca-chan/Hero by Booripley
??? Robot by Deltaconduit
Memodia by Sunhatgirl
Veehenchezz/Olliever by Bonkers B Bonkers
Yogbert by danimodder
Floe/Clawhauz/Vessel by MrkySpices
Ike by TheC0MICguy
Mike by Pep
Mike by Vulpes Borealis
Lucidia by TheYoterMan
Immortal Hydrangea/Lillian/Bonibon by Wandering Makers
Sockswald by TheWinterer
Solis by Marineflames
Dillon by jjaym15
Brianna Friz by TheMilkMan
Slush-E by 4444pi
Chancellor by Marmarbles
Minerva by Sylladexter
Seraphim/Laughing Vapor by Weaponizedalibi
Gerden by Right-brain-left-brain
Trinky by Marbles!!
Helel by ZET
Getty Wellson/Davilone by Yinky Tunes
Peris by PetahPetah
Graves by hazard100
Patient Zero by Nermike
Roulette by Dollyglot
Inka by Pixelator
Spree Blitz by Ornstein
Creengle Snap by Kael Salesman
Cehll by A Lego.
Meucci/Roundhouse/Rosaline/Candrell/Coda by Wilkus Milkus
Wormwood by Freedom Co.
Lux Aeterna/Hearty by Spamemailguy
Rumi/Sergoyle by Frosty
Wanky Jo/Nyyrk by Change_it
Hymnis/Knockpad by Bog
S. Lacker by TzarLicken
Tapes by Broom
Horse by ExistingKirb
Pup-C by Scare
Ornamiel/Chrysette/Bandit Aster/Kaerel/Moquiere/Baker & Ratty by Isastuff
Howdy by S.A.
The Great Bazow by Lettuce_turtle
Moonslammer by Vindicator
Monitoon/Mixel by Toosday
Senstar by Mr. Luwigi
Foe by Bryleethebig
Goldie by DeltaVelvet
Satinelle by Octobox
Remild by Espeon
Rainie by Left-Brain-Right-Brain
Rael by Direct to Darkness
Roti by Followerex
Candy/Pastrot by ColorWorld
Dr. Etal by Uevos
Edd-E & Snatchy/Princheque by Rejona
Harlamour by Rosaic
Fleur/Ice-E by Red
Railey/Vantablack by Glitch-the-artist
The Hopless by Cyphis6
Tee-V by Filipnofishstickfailure
Alvaos/Soupa by Bryan the Celestial
Lumia/Curly Bracket by Kate Bun
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Slightly inspired by @batposts
Bruce: What are you two doing?
Jason: What? I'm not allowed to bond with my little brother?
Tim: If you didn't want us hanging out, you shouldn't have adopted us.
Bruce: I meant what are you doing on the Bat Computer
Jason: Oh. Well I found that Timber here is destined to become a supervillian-
Bruce: He is not!
Jason: -Yeah yeah. Anyway I decided what he needs is some supervillian-like enrichment. So we're coming up with plans to take down our friends and family. Just really getting demented about it
Tim: It's really fun! Look at this one for if I become a tyrant.
Bruce, with his reading glasses on: Step 1. Have Dick tell me that Jack Drake would be very proud of what I'm doing. Step 2. Let Damian enjoy my existential crisis for 15 seconds. Step 3. Have Jason and Steph traq me to kingdom come
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