#to be honest he cared too much about their validation rather than sticking to his own moral compass because he wanted to be a ‘good Jedi’

[giacomettislament]

okay not to be wholesome in this house of horny but could i please request some Leona, Vil, and Cater with their s/o topping? like, not in a harsh way, but in a super affectionate, kissing all over, trying to make these boys flustered kind of way? Leona and Vil especially need to be knocked down a peg or two lol, thank you!

interior

“the sound you hear now is a fanfare.”

cater. leona. vil.

content warning(s): explicit content

—Cater has always been desperate for your love, desperate for any form of attachment and validation, that you wonder how far he’d be willing to go for a scrap of your attention. You would never hurt him or do anything against his will, but he’s so eager to make you smile that you can’t help but want to peek into this poor boy’s brain and see what it is that makes his heart ache for you.

“Feels good…! Feels good, feels good! Getting fucked by you is the best!” He squeals. It’s clear he doesn’t care if anyone hears him moaning like a bitch in heat, given how roughly he’s jerking his hips back against yours, and you mentally apologize to whoever might be hearing Cater’s mewls bleed through the walls. But despite that, you don’t stop whatever you’re doing to his body at all: fucking him rhytmically and jerking his leaking dick off until he’s shaking.

You bite down on his ear, and you net yourself another wanton groan for him. His voice sounds so high-pitched and sloppy, unlike his carefully crafted perky persona, but you would rather have this unfiltered honest version of him than whatever faux play he would put on for you.

“Does it feel that good?” You whisper. He makes a strangled cry when you stuff him full of your strap and lick the shell of his ear at the same time. It’s almost too much pleasure for the poor boy, and the wet noises of you fucking his ass combined with your low voice has him nearly coming undone right there and then.

“Yes! It feels so good! I love being fucked like this- Love being fucked by you!” He sounds like a porn star when he’s saying whatever floats up to his hazy thoughts, and you kiss him chastely. Cater chases your mouth for more, lapping at your lips lewdly and waiting for you to stick your tongue so far back in his throat that he chokes.

“You don’t need to try so hard to get me to like you, Cater. I already like you a lot,” you murmur. Cater freezes up against you, and when you jerk your hips against his, he spasms underneath you before letting out a muffled cry.

Something warm and sticky lands on your fingers.

“Cater, did you cum?”

“F-Fuck…!” He sounds like he’s about to cry. “You can’t just say things like that and expect me to- for me to-”

“I’m telling the truth.” You kiss him, over and over again. “I like you just as you are. Don’t settle for anything less than yourself to make me happy. I’m happiest when you’re you.”

“I…,” Cater’s eyes are wide and watery, and his dick twitches in your hand. His face turns the same color as his hair when he hardens up in your palm, and you laugh under your breath as you stroke him carefully.

You press your lips to his ear, making an exaggerated smooching noise. “Keep that in mind, Diamond. Why don’t we go for another round?”

—Humility. It’s a difficult topic for Leona to approach on all ends: he considers himself far from humble, yet he’s more than aware of his limitations. More than people give him credit for, to say the least. He knows having sex and being humble have very little correlation, but he’d be lying if he said he couldn’t feel his cheeks burn (with what exactly, he can’t say. Is it embarrassment? Love? Pride?) and his insides churn with a sort of twisted friction that makes his dick twitch against his sheets.

You sink your hips down on his ass gently, cooing his name with a roll of your tongue. He hates that he finds himself craving your voice like a cat chained up by their master, yet he can’t bring himself to cut himself off from you. You’re too sweet, too dear, too wonderful to him.

“You’re taking me so well, Leona,” you praise. He arches his back when your lips meet the nape of his neck. The tip of your strap ghosts over his G-spot, and Leona swears that he sees the stars for a split second.

He grits his teeth, glaring back at you over his shoulder. “Don’t mock me, herbivore.”

You kiss him again, and this time, you roll your hips carefully. Leona swallows back the moan rising in his chest, but the way his body tenses up doesn’t go unnoticed by you. You feel so good, stuffing him full with this stupid sex toy that has him reeling and completely at your mercy, like some good-for-nothing doe rather than a vain lion.

“I’m not mocking you,” you mouth against his skin. Your breaths are hot and heavy, trickling across his bare skin like the wisps of a happy memory long gone. “Is it wrong of me to want you? You’re so beautiful…”

“Don’t think you can fool me with your words.” Leona’s stomach twists at your praise, and he has a sudden urge to be held by you. He wonders how far your infatuation with him goes. Would you always be there for him, to whisper your angelic hymns and put him at peace? Or would tonight be the end of it all, leaving him alone in the sheets once the sun rises again?

—There are times when Vil appears to be more like a work of art than he does human. Stretches of unmarred skin tempt you to sink your teeth into it, marking his million-dollar complexion with hickies that would brand him as yours, and his magazine ads can’t even compare to how he looks when you’re ravishing him.

Vil smacks your wrist, and you flinch. The stinging pain whips you out of your reverie, and you hiss at your new wound.

The model clicks his tongue, shooting you a dirty look. “Gentle! Fuck- Potato, are you an idiot!? I said, be gentle!”

“Sorry,” you mutter, trying to cool him off by offering him a kiss to the corner of his lips. He huffs to himself but still whimpers softly when you thrust into him the way you know he likes it best.

“Great Seven… You’re incurable. I ought to really put you in your place, so you’ll stop fumbling around like a headless chicken.” Vil’s fingers curl around his sheets, and he swallows thickly. You love seeing him under you in this manner—a side of the worldwide acclaimed model and actor that no one gets to have. What kind of lucky star were you born under to have him be in love with you?

You chuckle, your tongue languidly tracing a heart into his neck. He shoots you a pointed look so that you remember not to bite down, and you fight the animalistic urge to do so. As much as you’d love to aggravate him and fuck him until he think, tonight isn’t the night for something so aggressive.

“You always say that, yet you never do anything. You can just say you love me, you know. No need to beat around the bush so much.” Your strap sinks into his puckered hole slowly, stretching him out, and Vil gasps sweetly.

“L-Like hell I would… Not when you’re this clumsy,” he chokes out, as if his insides weren’t sucking you in gratefully and hungrily. You know him too well to actually take any of his “insults” to heart; his unwavering cool facade only added to his ever-growing charm.

“Well, if you won’t say it, I will,” you laugh into his shoulder. “I love you, Vil.”

He pauses, and his violet eyes tremble when he looks up at you. He looks like a painting: golden hair splayed out like sunshine, lips quivering like a young maiden in love, pink blush pooling in his cheeks like a rosebud.

“You fool… You utter fool,” he whispers, leaning in towards your lips. “I love you too.”

x

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #cater diamond #leona kingscholar #vil schoenheit #x reader #gender neutral reader #lemon

[itsclydebitches]

Super random Ted Lasso thought of the day, but I’m really surprised by the number of times I’ve seen some version of, “Ted is a bad coach because he’s naively optimistic and always non-confrontational. I mean, he won’t even confront Nate about revealing his panic attacks” in just, like, the month I’ve been in the fandom. Beyond the fact that I don’t think Ted is nearly as much of a pushover as the fandom tends to portray him as — he has a specific reason for wanting Roy to speak up instead of doing it himself, he publicly calls Jamie out on his “injury” in the locker room, he candidly expresses his discomfort with hiring a therapist but puts that aside when he’s outvoted, but he sticks to his guns about keeping Roy on the pitch for at least part of the game (resulting in the “tortoise” overtaking the “hare”), his frustration with Nate and Beard being “negative nellies” is validated when, as soon as he gets a bit of support from Rebecca, that hopeful perspective helps him hit on the trick play idea that nearly ties them the game, etc. —  but even beyond all that, Ted is canonically trying to protect Trent here:

Trent: I was fired when they found out I revealed an anonymous source.

Ted: Oh snap. I didn’t say anything, I promise.

This exchange reveals that a) Ted had no idea Trent wanted out of his job and that b) he’d always planned to keep the tip quiet so as not to jeopardize his position. As far as Ted is concerned, Trent took a risk in texting him, but that information never needs to go beyond giving him the chance to come to terms with the article before it’s sprung on him. AKA, have any potential panic attacks in the privacy of his home that night, rather than while walking to work where, as we see, everyone has a newspaper and is talking about him, accosting him, or snapping pictures. Yes, those who Ted shared the secret with are the most likely candidates for the source (hence why Beard would be oh so happy to headbutt Nate) and yes, Ted could have potentially used that as an excuse for confronting him... but it’s still a risk. If Ted waltzes up to Nate and goes, “Hey, how could you tell Trent Crimm about my panic attacks?” Nate is less likely to think that Ted figured that out and far more likely to go, “That asshole reporter didn’t keep his promise of maintaining my anonymity.” Nate, who has just displayed a tendency for undercutting people who he perceives as having wronged him, goes to The Independent and gets Trent fired. That’s a distinct possibility Ted wants to avoid. Hence, “Oh snap. I didn’t say anything, I promise.”

Ted cares more about doing right by Trent — especially when Trent just did right by him — than he is concerned with confronting Nate with proof of his betrayal. Which seems like a pretty good decision to me when, as we see, that proof was never necessary. Nate is displaying so much open hostility at this point that Ted can go right up to him and say,

Ted: Everything okay? ... What is it, hm? What did I do? ... Oh c’mon, you’re mad as hell and I just want to know why. Huh? What have I got to learn here?

And that’s enough for Nate to spill everything he’s been thinking lately. There was never any need to reveal that he knew Nate was the leak.

Basically yeah, Ted uses his optimism and faith in others as a shield at times — we can think about his manically positive energy after receiving his divorce papers. Nate: “Is he okay?” Beard: “No!” — but outside of his marriage and the death of his father, I think Ted is more self-aware and willing to act on that knowledge than the fandom sometimes gives him credit for. Admittedly, there are times when his self-sacrificial nature arguably does more harm than good. There’s a lot of talk lately about whether Ted is a bad father for “abandoning” Henry in order to please Michelle. Which, to be honest, I think is too simplistic a take given the separation/divorce, the ability to stay in contact via technology, the implication that this job was/is temporary, Henry’s visit, Ted’s overt worries about quitting on people, and the reality that what’s good for some people (Michelle, Ted, the Richmond team) isn’t necessarily good for others (Henry). That’s just life. These characters are complex and, given the theme of imperfect fathers, it would be ridiculous for Ted to somehow manage a situation this messy without doing something that could potentially hurt Henry in the process, however unintentional. That doesn’t make him a bad person, or produce the shallow conclusion that he’s full-on abandoned his son. Ted is dealing with a situation where when he gets to chat with Henry over Christmas, his young kid doesn’t want to because there are toys to play with. Would Henry be better off if he was leaving Ted in the living room as opposed to on a screen? I don’t know. In some respects maybe, in others not at all. The point is, in a show where fathers are depressed to the point of suicide, cheaters whose actions are witnessed by their daughters, completely indifferent to their son’s accomplishments, or outright emotionally and physically abusive, it feels just a little off to chuck Ted in with all that. Maybe if we saw Henry struggling with his father’s absence, perhaps as a result of Ted failing to make an appropriate effort given the circumstances, but we don’t. Henry gets to come visit, is sent gifts, chats frequently, makes Dad robot drawings, sends him pictures of a bunch of ties to tease him about Richmond’s tie-streak. That doesn’t feel like a kid who has been abandoned, at least no more-so than the inevitable hardships of any divorce. The fact that Nate tries to throw that in his face anyway is, for me, pretty solid evidence that this kind of simplistic take isn’t meant to be viewed as a fact:

“to make you like me again” — We know that Ted does like Nate and is proud of him

“the photo I gave you for Christmas isn’t up in your office, it’s just dumb Americans” — We know that Ted has placed the photo in his room, by Henry’s

“so when the team fucks up, which they will” — They don’t fuck up, they succeed

“you can blame it on me, well no, fuck that” —  Ted has never once blamed Nate for a bad outcome. He has, in fact, frequently given him the credit for their success

“everybody loves you” — We’ve watched two seasons where Ted is hated by those around him at different times and in different ways: “Wanker! Wanker! Wanker!”

Everything Nate has said in this speech is either an outright falsehood, or is a simplified version of events that serve to paint Ted as the sole antagonist. So when we get to Nate trying to use abandoning Henry as another piece of evidence for why Ted is awful:

“shipped your ass back to Kansas where you belong with — with your son. Because you sure as hell don’t belong here”

It doesn’t ring true to me.

Anyway, sorry, didn’t mean to go on a tangent — or for this to turn into a generic Ted Lasso Defense post — but I think it’s a similar situation with Trent where yeah, Ted is sacrificing something, but not necessarily to the point of it being self-detrimental. What does confronting Nate or telling others about his betrayal accomplish? Nate being unable to face many facts of the situation when confronted? (As we saw.) His friends furious to the point of physical violence? (As we saw.) The knowledge that another friend would likely lose his career if Ted blabs? (As we saw.) Ted isn’t a pushover for keeping the secret, he’s considerate of how any action he takes would (likely negatively) impact those around him. Which is one of the many reasons why I love Ted as a character so much. There are times when he needs to learn moderation in his approach to coaching (striving to win is okay, Ted) and life (divorcing me is not quitting, Ted), but it’s also so refreshing to see someone who legitimately wants the best for others. That’s how he’s managed to help so many people in such a short amount of time, by asking, “What action can I take that will result in the most benefit for the most people, or the least amount of harm? If achieving that means I have to sacrifice something along the way, so be it.”

#Ted Lasso #Trent Crimm #Nate Shelley #mymetas

[kpostedsum]

daddy issues; D.M

summary: you and draco bond over issues in 6th year

word count: 2.4k

warnings: err angst, comfort, illusions to sex

song: daddy issues (the remix) - the neighbourhood

a/n: i tried not to make it stereotypical bc i didn’t wanna make it seem all “i like older men lol”, probably my fav fic i’ve written, also arent these anime gifs so cute

masterlist | taglist

Take you like a drug

I taste you on my tongue

Tongues battling for dominance, bodies rubbing against each other searching for a feeling. It’s become routine now, a different person in your dorm swallowing a new pill, entangling limbs with someone just to feel something.

You ask me what I'm thinking about

I tell you that I'm thinking about

Whatever you're thinking about

Tell me something that I'll forget

And you might have to tell me again

It's crazy what you'll do for a friend

It was a constant cycle, putting yourself out there seeking the male attention you crave, seeking validation, constant reassurance and trusting too easily. That’s how you ended up with a different guy who always in the end leaves. You trusted too easily and people took advantage of how trusting and naive you are just for a quick shag.

You wished it wasn’t like this but that’s all you knew, wanting to be the best version of yourself for someone just to feel needed, no matter if the person was good or bad for you. You didn’t care, you wanted love from anyone you could get it from even if it just hurt you more.

You’re familiar with the absence, something stable made you feel a bit wary. It wasn’t something you were used to. Your father wasn’t the most present in your life, and even though he's there, he's never really there.

Go ahead and cry, little girl

Nobody does it like you do

I know how much it matters to you

I know that you got daddy issues

And if you were my little girl

I'd do whatever I could do

I'd run away and hide with you

I love that she's got daddy issues, and I do too

You always wondered where you went wrong, he preferred your siblings over you and doesn't pay you a piece of his mind. Constantly going out of your way to get his attention whether it was academically or acting a certain way just to get some sort of reaction. But he was too preoccupied with his other children, even if they were from your mom or his affairs.

That’s how you found yourself right now sitting in the astronomy tower past curfew watching the rain fall, trying to clear your head while humming softly to yourself to keep yourself distracted.

You hear distant chattering from below and quickly get up from where you were sitting and make your way to your dorm unnoticed by anyone.

Except one person, Draco Malfoy.

I tried to write your name in the rain

But the rain never came

So I made with the sun

The shade

Always comes at the worst time

He’s seen you before, you’re known around Hogwarts for how you put yourself out there and how ‘desperate’ you are for some affection. He almost feels bad for you, but he’s in no place to judge. With his dad in Azkaban Draco had so much more to worry about, like his task and how he can succeed. But there was something about you that intrigued him that he couldn't ignore.

He saw you again in transfiguration the next day and noticed a few hickeys littering your neck that you had tried to cover but it didn’t work. He wondered why you gave yourself up to so many people, but once again he was in no place to judge. He noticed the way your tongue would stick out when you focused extra hard, the way your hands would tighten around your quill when you got a question wrong and your face.

The same face that many boys including the older years would fawn over, the face that entranced and attracted many, the face of someone who would do anything for someone for some affection and the face of someone who seeked out all the wrong things.

You ask me what I'm thinking about

I tell you that I'm thinking about

Whatever you're thinking about

Tell me something that I'll forget

And you might have to tell me again

It's crazy what you'll do for a friend

You walk out of transfiguration on your way to the owlery to send a letter to your parents and feel eyes watching you everywhere. You like it, the attention, it’s something that you thrived in, but you couldn’t help but feel a new set of eyes on you.

Once you reached the owlery you realized you weren't the only one there, Draco Malfoy was also there sending a letter to who you assumed was his mother.

“y/n, right?” he asked, trying to spark a conversation.

“Yea, listen i’m sorry about what happened with your father i know you really looked up--”

“Dont worry about it, he wasn’t as good an influence as I made him out to be,” he sighed, looking away.

“My dad isn’t the best either if i’m being honest, i guess we’re in the same boat” you let out a light chuckle.

And that’s how you found yourself hanging out with draco malfoy bonding over your shared issues.

Go ahead and cry, little girl

Nobody does it like you do

I know how much it matters to you

I know that you got daddy issues

And if you were my little girl

I'd do whatever I could do

I'd run away and hide with you

I love that she's got daddy issues

It’s been weeks since you two started hanging out since the interaction in the owlery and have been getting closer ever since. You both sat down together in the astronomy tower, backed against the wall as the cool wind blew against your faces. The aura between you two was calm, a comfortable silence.

“So tell me about your dad, how is it with him in Azkaban?” you asked, tilting your head towards him.

“Mother’s not taking it well” he frowned. “I can’t even say potter’s wrong for getting him locked up because he deserves it. All my life he praised the dark lord and taught me to be selfish and always defend my blood, but he was never there for me when I needed him. I would have done everything just to hear ‘i’m proud of you’ but it never came. It’s worse now because mother’s all alone. I wish I could have stayed with her” he sighed looking out the tower watching the stars twinkle.

“I’ve noticed you’ve been much quieter this year as well, you stopped making fun of people. It’s not that nice on the receiving end huh?” you said with a teasing look on your face.

He shook his head at you scooting closer to you, it’s like the demeanor between you two have changed over the past few weeks. You found yourself pining over him rather than being in someone's bed. But this is how the cycle always goes, you get attached and they leave, you couldn’t help but hope this wasn’t the situation this time.

“Tell me about your father”

Daddy stuck around but he wasn't present

Cheated on your mom but she never left him

First I didn't get it, now I understand

He broke her heart, left money in her hand

So everything got paid for

She made sure you and your brother had way more

Than she ever had growing up

And when you told me the whole story I felt like throwing up

“ I don't know if i’d even call him my father at this point, he doesn't want me.” you sighed. “He's been cheating on my mum for years now and she still won't leave him because she thinks they can work it out. He’s had affairs with different pureblood women and has children with them. But what hurts the most is how he treats them as his own children and treats me as if I don't exist” you said, looking down as tears pooled your eyes.

Draco moved closer to you and brought his arm around your shoulders for a sense of comfort and waited for you to catch your breath so you can continue.

“I just want him to love me” you cried. “I go out my way to try and get his attention with my school work but it never works. That's why I get along with so many guys. I seek the validation, the comfort and the reassurance that I can get from him from others and I am so tired of it. I just want him to want me draco.” tears slipping out your eyes as you looked up at him, you’ve never confessed this to anyone before.

“Everyone always leaves, please don't leave me” you cried

“I’m not going anywhere” he turned his face towards you, leaning forward cautiously as if you were made of glass.

You leaned forward, wanting the exact same thing. Both very hesitant he gently pressed his soft lips against yours and they moved together in sequence, only taking a break to go back to his dorm and to breathe, limbs tangled together for the rest of the night until the sun rose.

I can see it on your face it was rough left a bad taste on your tongue

And she didn't even take any drug

She would rain all day

Couldn't wait for her son to shine

And you made it shine

There when she cried, you saved her life

It's been a week since that night in the astronomy tower and draco had already been avoiding you. It’s humiliating, but you should have known. You thought the ‘bond’ you had with him would last, it felt so genuine this time. So real.

You’d see him around the halls snogging pansy on your way back to the ravenclaw tower, lowering your head down so he wouldn’t be able to see you so you could get by quickly and unnoticed.

But he saw you.

He stared you right down in your teary eyes as he made out with pansy. You couldn’t help but feel a sense of betrayal, for someone who promised he wouldn’t leave you like everyone else, he did the exact same.

You did the only thing you knew of, you ran.

I keep on trying to let you go

I'm dying to let you know

How I'm getting on

I didn't cry when you left at first

But now that you're dead it hurts

This time I gotta know

Where did my daddy go?

I'm not entirely here

Half of me has disappeared

Draco followed you to the girls lavatory, hearing your shallow cries coming from one of the stalls. He approached the stall you were in trying not to make too much noise so he doesn't startle you.

He felt awful.

He promised he would never leave you, after you both poured your hearts out to each other but he still left. He had too, he was putting you in danger just by being with him. If Voldemort ever found out about you and hurt you he wouldn't be able to live with himself, that's why he took it upon himself to hurt you first.

“y/n are you in here?” he called out even though he knew the answer.

You recognized that familiar voice anywhere. “What do you want draco?” you said, trying to make it seem as if you weren’t just crying.

“I want to talk to you, please”

“No,” you said getting up and pushing yourself out of the stall. “You don't get to just throw me away after I told you everything and just come back into my life like nothing ever happened. Just go away, that's all you guys are good for” you spat.

“Just listen to me, it was to keep you safe. I didn;t want to but i couldn't bear seeing you hurt” he tried to explain.

“Safe?” you laughed. “ and what exactly do i need saving from, malfoy.”

“From me” he said as he pulled up his sleeve revealing his dark mark to you. Your body instantly tensed, you knew he was having problems and his family was involved with the dark lord but you never knew it was like this.

“Draco i-” you tried to say something but the words were stuck in your throat. He stood there looking at you desperately like he was waiting for you to tell him everything was okay, you wanted to be there for him but you didn’t know what to do. You trusted him with everything but he couldn't trust you with this? You thought the bond you had made would have made him trust you in the slightest, but clearly it's always you who’s more trusting.

“Why didn't you tell me?” you managed to say, your voice hoarse.

“I thought you’d leave me, you were the only good thing i had. Please don't leave me” he begged, salty tears escaping his eyes and running down his cheeks as he looked at you with desperation.

“So you thought pushing me away by snogging pansy was better?” you yelled, as he continued to look at you slightly taken aback by your lashing out.

“You know what, go ahead and cry little boy. You know that your daddy did too, you know what your mama went through. You gotta let it out soon, just let it out” you taunted walking closer to him looking straight into his teary eyes.

“This time I'll be the one that leaves.” and with that you were gone.

Go ahead and cry, little girl

Nobody does it like you do

I know how much it matters to you

I know that you got daddy issues

And if you were my little girl

I'd do whatever I could do

I'd run away and hide with you

I love that she's got daddy issues, and I do too

It’s been months since that night in the girls lavatory, and you missed him. You wanted to visit him in the hospital wing once you heard what happened with Harry Potter, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do so. He left you, and you were tired of always going back to people who just hurt you.

Now here you were at the battle of Hogwarts, standing with everyone while Voldemort and his death eaters stood across from you all.

“Draco, draco come here” you heard narcissa call from across the scene. He looked hesitant, as if he was waiting for someone to stop him but no one did. So he started walking over to his parents.

But you grabbed his hand.

“Stay please” you whispered looking up into his eyes.

He looked back at his parents and back at you like he was contemplating his answer.

“I’ll stay”

If you were my little girl

I'd do whatever I could do

I'd run away and hide with you

I love that she's got daddy issues, and I do too

—————-

tagging fun ppl nd ppl who interacted (so srry if u don’t wanna be tagged)

@hellohellook @astoria-malfcy @justfangirlthingies @sfdlm @falling-loki @notvasi @gwlvr @malfoytookmyheart

#draco malfoy #draco malfoy x reader #draco fuckingmalfoy #draco malfoy angst #draco malfoy fluff #draco malfoy smut #draco lucius malfoy #harry potter #fred x hermione #fred weasley #george weasley #ron weasly x reader #remus x sirius #the mauraders #sirius black #james potter #harry x ginny #pansy parkinson #blaise x y/n #theodore nott #draco malfoy imagine #draco x y/n

[winterscaptain]

long shot.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader a joyful future fic - no context required

a/n: this is in response to this ask in kind of a loose way, and also fulfills kiss prompt #6 (on a falling tear). i sat down and wrote this all in one sitting this weekend and it makes me smile SO MUCH. tell me what you think! i hope you enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it :) this one takes place in au!december 2012

words: 2.3k warnings: alcohol use/mention, allusions to sex, language

summary: “i couldn’t have dreamed you into existence because i didn’t even know i needed you. you must have been sent to me.” - kamand kojouri

It’s a rare early night off in December and you all make the ill-advised choice to go to the bar closest to the base for some drinks and dancing, completely forgetting that academy graduation is tomorrow. 

There’s part of you that feels aged by the whole thing. Even newly-minted agents your own age look fresh-faced and about a decade younger than you feel. 

When you all walk in, there’s a bit of a hush, a lull, in the conversations around you. You find eyes on you from all directions and realize your faces are familiar ones, and in the case of Aaron and Dave, almost-famous ones. 

Aaron pulls you further into him, almost shielding you with his body as you navigate through the crowd that parts before you. It seems like an eternity before you find a table, but Derek, Aaron, and Spencer hold down the fort while the rest of you manage drinks. Strategic postings at either end of the bar is likely going to get you the best return, so you fan out accordingly. 

It’s unsurprising in the least when the bartenders make a beeline for you all, getting your orders down and drinks started over the shouts of NATs - many of them already blasted with three or four shots under their belt. 

While you wait, you can still feel a fair few pairs of eyes on you. You meet one pair, set in the face of a rather handsome new agent about your age. He smiles at you, and you shift your eyes away from him, your expression unmoving. 

He apparently takes that as invitation enough. Out of the corner of your eye, you spot him as he winds his way to your side. 

You meet Aaron’s eyes across the room, and there’s a smile in them. You offer the smallest twitch of your lips and a wink. Watch this. 

Oh, I’m watching, his eyebrows say. 

“Hi.” The young agent finally reaches your side and offers his hand. You take it. “Agent Mark Sullivan.” 

You smile thinly and introduce yourself. “So, I take it you’ve just received an assignment?”

He laughs, making an attempt at charm. “Alright. You’re a profiler,” he says with confidence. “What gave me away?” It’s a challenge.

It’s also a long shot. A really really long shot. 

There were plenty of people in the vicinity that would be reeled in by his warm smile and handsome jawline, but your fine man (currently sprawled back in his chair with an arm on the back of the chair and a hand over his mouth to cover his smile) stands head and shoulders above the rest, sometimes literally. 

“Well,” you start, making a show of eyeing him from head to toe, “Your papers are still in your pocket and you’ve left your ID tag on, against academy and bureau regulations.” 

He startles and snatches it off his lapel, tucking it into his pocket. 

With a little smile, you soothe his embarrassment - it’s a play only designed to endear yourself to him. “It tells me you’re proud, excited. I felt the same way when I received my assignment and credentials. It’s a significant accomplishment.”

You can’t quite tell in the irregular darkness in the room, but he looks almost like he’s blushing. “Thanks.” He collects himself after a moment, putting his bravado back on. 

Your eyes flicker to Hotch once, twice. He’s still watchful. Amused. 

“So, I was lucky enough to see your lectures with the BAU and I must say...it’s impressive.” 

He says that like it’s some kind of validation. 

I need validation from this clown like I need a hole in the head. 

“Thanks. I’m usually rather modest, but I think it’s alright to say the BAU is a very fine unit.” If you’re honest, you’re talking about one particular unit chief’s...um...unit, specifically, but that’s neither here nor there.

He smirks. “What would you say if I told you I got a placement on one of the BAU teams?”

You raise your eyebrows. “Really? That’s quite the accomplishment.” A pair of arms wind around you and a kiss is pressed to your temple. 

It would also be a lie.

You smile and flip in Aaron’s arms, completely ignoring poor Mark. “I was just getting you a drink,” you explain, gesturing vaguely to the bar behind you. 

“I see. Did you get me -”

“Double scotch, neat, aged at least fifteen years? Yes, sir.” 

He smiles. “You know me so well.” 

“I sure do.” You pull him down by his tie and plant a firm kiss on his lips and shove him off with a smile. “Go. Sit. I’ve got it.” 

You turn back to Mark with a breathless sort of laugh. Aaron always makes you feel a little flushed and you’re happy to play it up for the benefit of the moment. “Sorry about that.” 

Mark, you find, is reconsidering his strategy. His face, while still outwardly warm, harbors a kind of calculated look to it that would almost be funny if you weren’t so eager to see what kind of trick he’d pull next. “So, Hotchner?”

“What about him?”

Mark shrugs. “I dunno. Doesn’t he have a kid?”

You nod. “Yep.” 

“And he’s a widower, right?”

“Yes.” 

Mark laughs a little. “Wouldn’t it be kinda nice to, I dunno, have some fun for a little while?”

You frown at him, and your drink arrives at the hands of the frazzled bartender. You pull the fifty from your sleeve and pass it to him with a smile. After a sip, you ask. “What do you mean?”

“It seems like a lot to take on, you know?” He backpedals upon seeing your squint. “I mean, I’m sure he’s a great guy, but wouldn’t it be nice to have someone...I dunno -” He restores his confidence and leans on the bar. Again, his moves would probably work on someone else, but you were a lost cause. “- easier?”

Aaron’s scotch arrives. You pick it up in your free hand and shrug somewhat breezily. “Maybe.” 

You brush past him, leaving Mark a little confused and a bit stunned. When you return to the table after much jostling, you take a seat right on Aaron’s lap and pass him his drink, reclining in his arms. Scanning over the crowd, Mark’s frowning face sticks out like a sore thumb and you try not to look too smug. 

Other than Rossi, the rest of the team is already out on the dance floor, so you know Aaron doesn’t mind having you close. 

He sets his scotch down and wraps his arms around you kissing the underside of your jaw. You lean into his touch and smile. 

There’s nothing easier than this. 

+++

There’s something a bit sulky about Aaron when you settle next to him in bed. You squint at him, looking for his eyes as they follow the loose pattern on the bedspread. 

“Hey.” You bump his shoulder with yours. “What’s on your mind?” 

He shakes his head a little, still not meeting your eyes. “Nothing. Just thinking.” 

With a roll of your eyes, you throw the covers off and sling a leg over him, straddling his thighs. You tap your palms on his pecs on-beat with your begging. “Come on. Tell me tell me tell me tell -”

“Jesus, alright!” He cuts you off with two hands over yours, his thumbs running fondly over your knuckles. “I just…” He huffs, already a little frustrated with himself for feeling put out. 

You slide your hands out from underneath his, running up over his collarbones and shoulders to find the hair at the nape of his neck. 

“I couldn’t help but overhear…”

You let all your breath out in a huff. “Oh, Aaron. He’s a stupid NAT who knows the only way to come after you is to come after your history.” You kiss his cheek and tuck into him. “He was trying to be a big-dick boy and it didn’t pay off for him.” 

There’s a halfhearted laugh from underneath you, and his hands wander across your back. “He is right, though. It would be easi-”

“If you say ‘easier,’ Aaron Hotchner, I’m going to lose my shit.” 

He sighs, and you pull back, tipping his chin up with a finger. 

“Hey. I love Jack. He is not an added weight in my life. He does not make my life harder in any way. Your son,” you emphasize with taps on his lips, “is the light of my life and I wouldn’t ever want to be without him.” 

Aaron’s eyes get a little misty. For his sake, you ignore it and continue. 

“I never feel like a replacement for Haley. I’ve never once minded leaving room for her in our lives because she’s my friend and I love her and I love you. I loved you before we lost her and I’ve loved you long after. This baggage keeps my feet firmly planted on the ground.” 

Aaron takes a deep breath, and his voice has the smallest of wavers when he speaks. Before he even starts, you concede to let him share what he’s feeling, if only to rebut it. “But you could - you could have so much. You could have someone ten or fifteen years younger who - I don’t know - could do things with you that thirty-somethings do. You wouldn’t have to spend your weekends at soccer games or your evenings rubbing Icy Hot on my bad knee or dealing with me on rough pain days or raising your voice because I can’t hear shit on my right side.” 

He shakes his head, and you brush the tears that fall with your thumbs. “You could have - You deserve, so much more...” The rest of his words go unspoken, but you hear them anyway. 

You deserve so much more than me.

Your eyes sting and you blink rapidly, letting your tears wet your lashes. Leaning forward, you kiss away his remaining tears, shifting your weight to wrap your legs around his waist and get as close as you can. 

With your head on his left shoulder, you whisper, “Aaron, I don’t want someone ten or fifteen years younger. I don’t care what I’m doing on my evenings and weekends because I get to spend them with you.” 

You pause for a moment. “And, I don’t need boys. I’m done with boys.” 

You lean back, looking him square in the eye, or at least trying to. “I have a man who has silver in his hair because he worries and is in his mid-forties and it doesn’t fucking matter. I have a man who is the subject of so many crushes and fantasies at the academy it makes me want to vomit.” You laugh a little at your own joke, but he’s still focused on the seam of your shirt at your collar. Changing gears, you bring your hands to the sides of his neck, feeling his pulse jump under your thumbs.

“I have no need for boys because I have a man who treats me with kindness and respect. A man who is thoughtful, who isn’t afraid of himself. A man who knows himself, who loves his son, who invited me into his life when he didn’t have to because he’s brave.”

A couple more tears fall down your cheeks and you frame his face with your hands. “You love better and more courageously than anyone I have ever known.” 

You sniffle a little. “Aaron, honey...I love you. I wouldn’t want anything else, or anyone else, for my life, to be my partner, my best friend, the person I love. Odds have it that you’ll be my husband and the father of any other kids we might acquire and that we’ll grow even older and grayer together.” 

You let a little facetious smirk cross your lips. “And I’d like you to look at me and tell me I’d be happy with some dickhead named Mark with a business degree who wears shoes well-outside his pay grade.” 

That does it. 

Aaron smiles and pulls you to him with a hand at the back of your head. Your lips meet and you can taste the saltwater, but it doesn’t matter. 

He pulls back to look at you, and he really looks at you. His eyes roam hungrily over your face as if trying to memorize every line and curve and lash and budding wrinkle he finds there. 

You simply melt in the dark brown of his eyes, watching him take his time. 

Even then, as you expected, there is some doubt - not in you, of course, but in him. “Really?”

“Really.” You hold up your fist between your faces, pinky extended. “Pinky promise.” 

He smiles a little and links your pinkies together, twisting your hands to kiss your knuckles. Your hands drop into your lap and another little smile crosses your face. 

“What?” He asks.

You shrug. “I’m also thinking about how thirty-something-year-old boys absolutely suck in bed. I can pretty much guarantee that you’re better at - well, just about everything.” 

He closes his eyes and smiles, looking the picture of a happy house cat in the sun. You draw closer, running your nose along his. He leans toward you and captures your lips again. 

The next few hours? Don’t worry. They’re spent proving your point.  

+++

tagging: @arganfics @quillvine @stxrryspencer @agenthotchner @hurricanejjareau @ughitsbaby @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @shrimpyblog @genevievedarcygranger @ssaic-jareau @good-heavens-chris-evans @davidrossi-ismydad @angelsbabey @writefasttalkevenfaster @venusbarnes @hotchsflower @ogmilkis @marvels-agents100 @hotchslatte @risenfox @mrs-dr-reid @captain-christopher-pike @dwellingsofrosie @pan-pride-12 @sunshine-em @word-scribbless @jdougl-love @sageellsworth05 @dreila03 @forgottenword @aaronhotchnerr @ssa-morgan @buckybau @sana-li @tegggeeee @abschaffer2 @ssacandice-ray @ellyhotchner @lotties-journey-abroad @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25 @laneygthememequeen @violentvulgarvolatile  @mooneylupinblack @ssareidbby @violet-amxthyst @bwbatta @roses-and-grasses @lcvischmitt @capricorngf @missdowntonabbey @averyhotchner @mandylove1000 @cevanswhre @qvid-pro-qvo @jeor @spencers-hoodrat @infinity1321 @zizzlekwum @popped-weasels @evee87 @nuvoleincielo @this-broken-band-girl @reidtomestyles @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @winqhster @spencerelds @the-falling-in-the-danger @nattylite49 @crazyshannonigans @softbibxtch @iconicc @mangoberry43 @andreasworlsboring101 @kerrswriting @mac99martin @itsalwaysb33nyou

#aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner #criminal minds #hotch #tali writes fanfiction #tali talks cm #a joyful future #a joyful future fanfic

[metalheadmickey]

To be honest I think a lot of the dislike for how Ian and Mickey were treated in s11 was that the low-stakes conflict had little to no substance, and it was left to the audience to decide why these things were happening. They never explain why Mickey spent the money or what happened to the job he had in s10. They deleted him trying to get a job for Ian and showing he wanted to put the effort it. When he goes to the job interview in 11x02, the scene is deliberately written to laugh at him and they don’t explore the seriousness of the very real difficulties he would have getting a proper job given his background. Of course one of the most disappointing things is that they deleted the kitchen scene that would give a little depth to their conflict in the beginning of the season and felt consistent with past characterization.

For me personally, it seemed every writer had a different interpretation of Ian and Mickey, and the way they act and respond to situations isn’t consistent throughout the season. 11x06 sticks out to a lot of people because they actually felt like multi-dimensional characters, and there was angst balanced with funny, sweet moments. I personally found it nice that they were dealing with a conflict together rather than against each other. Same with 11x08. I really like 11x10 as well because it felt very in character for the both of them, and Corina takes Mickey seriously which I appreciate. She doesn’t have anybody laugh at his feelings and understands why he would be reluctant to leave the Southside. The early scenes of 11x11 were really good but then he throws a tantrum and the piss in the pool comment was just weird…It just felt like the writers were laughing at him in those moments. I feel like they could have continued to lean into him not feeling comfortable in new environments after a lifetime of trauma instead of making fun of him for being “too poor” or “too stupid” to function in the West Side. That apartment manager was classist and patronizing, and yet the episode framed Mickey as being unreasonable and immature for being upset over it and had him throw a fit. As we’ve seen in past seasons, and the episodes of s11 that felt in character, he’s emotionally observant and knows how to handle conflict in a pragmatic way.

Overall, I don’t hate s11. There are things I don’t care about as much as a lot of people do. For instance, I don’t have a grudge against 11x07. I don’t mind that there aren’t big dramatic moments every episode and I liked some of the light hearted fun. I just wish when it came to the problems that they created, it was taken seriously. I don’t want to see Ian and Mickey in pain, but they’ve experienced so much of it in their lives, together and separately. That translates into how they would act in their marital issues but the show for the most part disregards it because they stopped caring about depth. It gave me the things I wanted to see for these characters, particularly Mickey, but the execution was disappointing at times. I’m so happy he’s free from Terry, not in prison, and he’s so successful, happy, and secure. It is just a shame some of the writers didn’t take him seriously.

Hey there, anon!

Wow, I really appreciate how much care and thought you put into this ask. And I'm going to try to put as much care and thought into my answer as I think this ask deserves, so I hope I do it justice.

Basically my answer to this is that I think this is incredibly valid, and in fact I actually agree with...pretty much everything you say here. I just came from a place of having low or no expectations, so I sort of just let myself enjoy season 11 for what it was, and I ended up loving it. That doesn't mean I wasn't disappointed in some things. The deleted scene from 11x04 is probably my most notable frustration with the season. It haunts me. It would have added so much depth and provided some context. The deleted scene from 11x01 of Mickey trying to get a job at the laundromat is something that I'm actually grateful they deleted, it just made me uncomfortable and I hated the no mask detail. The scene of him interviewing in 11x02 makes me cringe. Probably the most unwatchable Mickey moment for me all season besides his confrontation with the apartment complex manager in 11x11 before his poolside meltdown. So yes, there were things that I disliked or was uncomfortable with.

There are moments or details I often find myself meta-ing my way through before I start blaming writers for things, I think because I tend to want to stay immersed in the story even when I'm picking things apart. For instance, you bring up Mickey not having his job at Old Army anymore. I just figured because malls were shut down during quarantine, he was probably laid off. But some things that bug me seem to have no explanation that I can meta my way towards, such as Mickey spending the wedding present money. What did he spend it on? They live together, their bedroom is tiny, they spend a ton of time together. So how could he manage to buy all this "stuff" without Ian knowing anything about it? It just seems implausible. I chalked that one up to the writers. They left it up to the viewers to decide what happened, as you said, but they didn't really give us much to work with.

I agree with what you say about 11x06, 11x08, and 11x10. Those were great episodes. 11x07 is an interesting one, I don't hold a grudge against it either (do I open that can of worms? I loved that episode). 11x11 is tricky because it is a really interesting Mickey episode, and then...he's throwing a tantrum and tossing furniture into a pool. When I watched it I kind of didn't think anything of it, like some people just have shitty days and have a hard time working through them. He had a lot of built-up frustration by then, and while Mickey is emotionally observant and knows how to deal with conflict, sometimes growing frustration can make people snap. Even the most emotionally intelligent people can melt down. People aren't always going to deal with problems the same way all the time. And he'd been having uncomfortable moment after uncomfortable moment all day, so I think by the time Melanie was being a patronizing asshole, he'd had it. So he snapped. So it's not a great scene, but I found myself justifying it when I watched it. And interestingly, opposite from you, I saw it as framing Melanie as a jerk, therefore justifying Mickey's reaction. To me it looked like the scene was meant to have us sympathize with him while thinking she was an asshole. His reaction was still a lot though. As for the "piss in the pool" comment, I didn't take it to mean that he was going to like, be pissing in the pool regularly or anything. I took it as an indication that he was going to continue finding little ways to continue being who he is while living there. And maybe sometimes that means being like "fuck this place" and then literally pissing in the pool, who knows. I thought that was fine. But yeah, I didn't take it as the writers trying to convey that he's "too stupid" to navigate the west side. I think his conversation with Ian at the end of the episode about being uncomfortable and experiencing a lot of pressure while being there shone a little bit of a light on how his upbringing and his past has made it hard for him to know how to handle nice things. "Maybe I don't like nice." Maybe he doesn't know how to deal with nice yet. This isn't me trying to dismiss your concerns, by the way, this is just how I interpreted these parts of the episode.

"It gave me the things I wanted to see for these characters, particularly Mickey, but the execution was disappointing at times." That is the vibe, my dude. And I understand what you mean about the show not caring about depth anymore. I think they may have phoned it in a little for the last season, even though there were opportunities for some deeper explorations of some of the themes they introduced. But I'll always fly a flag for season 11 because it made me really happy and I think it gets an undeserved amount of hate, although it's true that it wasn't perfect. I think I've just chosen to approach it with an overwhelming amount of positivity because I loved watching it, I love them, I love being here, and I'm here because I want to have fun. Season 11 is goofy as hell. But I love it. I'm glad you were able to get some goodness out of it too, anon.

Thanks for coming to me with this. Feel free to hit me up any time.

#asks #gallavich #shameless #shameless season 11 #season 11 positivity

[attack-on-kiwi]

For the fluff alphabet could you maybe do Erwin or Jean? Both of them are my personal favorite characters

You’ve got good taste! 

Jean alphabet can be found here

Erwin Smith:

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Meals together is a huge thing for Erwin. This man’s schedule is packed to the rim, so any free time where he can catch his s/o hungry is perfect. He enjoys sharing even just a pastry or chat over a drink if that’s all they have time for.

Erwin looks forward to sleeping in the same bed as them. He considers embracing one another a completely valid pastime and ranks it as one of his top favorite activities. 

If he’s able to take his s/o out, he’ll do so at the fanciest place available (though, that’s not many considering where he is stationed at any given time).

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Their persistence and drive is what drew Erwin to them. He held himself to a rule about not giving into personal relationships when he became commander of the scouts since it would understandably get in the way of his goals, but his s/o never gave up on him. In the end, he was convinced to give the two a chance, and he couldn’t be more surprised by just how much they ended up meaning to him. 

Erwin finds their legs gorgeous. He’s a legs man, and there’s something about the way they’re only exposed for him that brings out an extremely possessive and blatantly mischievous side of him. He could spend all night kissing up their calves and thighs and not need a moment’s rest.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Erwin tries to be calm about the entire thing. He’ll immediately get them out of any noisy environment and try to coax the reason why their panicking out of them. He’s patient and lets them ride out the attack however they need to while stroking their back. He won’t say too much, rather he thinks if they want to talk to him they will. He’s not one to pressure them, but he’ll let them know he’s going to be there when they need to. 

He’s not one to get too hung up on their moods- after all, he needs to worry about other things, and unfortunately, their episode stays just another happening of the past.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Erwin doesn’t envision a future. Instead, he sticks to getting through days. He’s aware that his, and most likely his s/o’s, time is limited, so he’s not one to delude himself into thinking he truly has a future. Especially as the commander of the scouts, every expedition leads him just feet away from the jaws of death. That being said, Erwin is definitely an ‘in-the-moment’ type of person who does try to make the most of any time he can spend with his lover.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He’s definitely dominant. He knows what he wants, and he’s quite expressive of any expectations he has. It’s important to him to be transparent and own up to being with someone. (Though, that doesn’t mean he’s completely open to them). Erwin likes to be in control and in the know of what he’s getting himself into, so he’s more than likely to take charge. He’s also a natural leader, so those tendencies can seep into his relationship more often than not.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Erwin can forgive but he can’t forget. For smaller issues, he really doesn’t care, though he might think his s/o is being immature and will state as such. If the issue is more serious, such as loyalty or cheating him in some way, then he’s truly a power to be reckoned with. He’s logical when it comes to conflict, and this can be deadly as he will only face the cold hard facts. It’s uncommon for his anger to get the best of him. The most his s/o can expect is severe disappointment and long term trust issues that may never be resolved. Yes, he holds grudges, even if he seems all prim and proper.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

He’s thankful for his s/o sticking by his side even though he can be a challenge to get along with. He knows he’s not the most approachable, and it’s even harder for someone to get him in a vulnerable state. Because of this, he’s always counting his blessings when it comes to him. He can be inconsistent in his displays of affection, and his s/o will question their place in his life at times. He doesn’t want them to, but he’s also aware that he’s not the best partner for someone who requires more tender and frequent care. He knows all too well the sacrifices his s/o makes for him, and he holds them dear to his heart always.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Yes, he has secrets. His true motives for his mission are never spoken of. Most of his past is a mystery as well, and it would take years or a notable traumatic experience for Erwin to even consider sharing anything with his s/o. He  believes if he’s with them in the moment, the past and topics that are irrelevant to them shouldn’t be important. 

He doesn’t go out of his to make it apparent that there are barriers. Unless his s/o is quite perceptive or has been with him for a long period of time, they may be none the wiser.

That being said, Erwin does hold a facade in public. He has to conduct himself in a specific manner as the commander of the scouts. When alone with his lover, he is more willing to relax and joke around with them. That’s his way of being honest.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

No. Erwin’s stubborn in his ways, and he thinks he’s got this whole people thing down. His s/o brings out a more sluggish side of him--one that will indulge in staying in bed for a few minutes longer than appropriate, but there’s nothing notable. However, his s/o does grow thicker skin in their relationship and learn how to be more logical. It’s a byproduct of being around a calculated man who doesn’t feel the need to water himself down. 

Erwin is more than happy to guide his s/o with their issues. In fact, it’s one way he shows affection. To him, putting in effort to reduce pressure on his partner’s shoulders is one of the most noble deeds a lover can take part of. He’s on the practical side, after all, so putting his skills to use in such a manner is right up his alley.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Erwin is too secure with himself to even bother getting jealous. He knows he can handle any unwarranted passes and can get rid of people that may try to get too close to his s/o. Usually, he’ll let his s/o deal with a situation themselves-- seeing how they respond to obvious attraction is one way he gauges if they are worth the long-term. If it’s a situation they’re uncomfortable in or obviously overpowered, Erwin is more than willing to step in.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Erwin’s a phenomenal kisser. Working his way around his s/o’s lips is natural for him, and he knows just how to tease them to get them begging. He utilizes this skill more than he should, and how his s/o hasn’t slapped him for it is beyond anyone.

Their first kiss was sloppy and desperate. It was in his office after an expedition that left the scouts numbers dwindling, as always. The adrenaline and stress of another failed mission just overtook him, and his then indulgent interest was trying to relax him with a shoulder massage. Erwin simply cursed under his breath and stood up to face them. Next thing they knew, the commander wasn’t even giving them a moment to breathe with how hard he was loving their lips and neck. It surely left bruises, but no one was complaining.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Erwin has never confessed lol

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

The thought of marriage crosses his mind only when he’s in a desperate situation, such as losing his arm on the battlefield and then when he has his fateful encounter with the beast titan. 

If he ever did propose, it would be a quiet affair, likely in his office where the two were illuminated by candlelight. Erwin has the rings already, and he’d just officiate for them, since there’s no use in getting an official one. He would consider it if his s/o requested it. Very few know the two are married, though he doesn’t make an effort to hide the face. He wears his ring when he can and will often find himself glancing at it.

Marriage with Erwin is nothing over the top. He will get his s/o gifts when he can and will love them as often as his schedule permits. For the most part, nothing about the relationship changes.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

“Dear”, “My other half”, “Sweetheart”, He likes using classical nicknames that can roll off his tongue and make his s/o melt. No matter how cheesy the names are, it’s impossible for his s/o to not feel giddy.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

He’s kinder, patient, and allows himself to enjoy the little moments. He’ll take pause. He’ll smile openly. That facade of his cracks ever so slightly. Most others don’t take notice--no one knows him enough to tell a difference. His s/o can feel his love through his gentle kisses, the way he has a hand on their back in a crowd, how he always checks in with them before taking his leave, and the way his eyes look ever so slightly far off in a dream as he admires them.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Erwin isn’t prone to outright stating his relationship, though he will not hide it. If at an event, he is more than happy to introduce them as his s/o and even takes pride in the notion. He won’t brag, but he might allude to someone taking his s/o by example. “___ is exceptional at that, you might want to ask them”. 

Public displays of affection are limited to kisses on the cheek and linking arms. As the leader of the scouts, he’s not privy to the idea of going around and being intimate where everyone can see, but more so than that, he likes to keep his relationship to himself. It’s a personal one, so he’d rather enjoy it in his own peace.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Erwin’s a scientist in the kitchen. He can make do with few ingredients and bring out the most of a meal. It’s always a treat to see what he’s coming up with, and date nights often end with him providing the fruits of his labor. Cooking is one of the few times his s/o gets to see him completely relaxed, so they try to have random ingredients lying around in case he wants to grace them with both his beauty and culinary skill. 

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Now, I know I’ve been saying Erwin isn’t too personal, but he’s still romantic. Again, just in a traditional sense. He’ll slow dance in his office with his s/o and kiss them up and down their neck to make them laugh. He tells little off-hand jokes that most people, except his s/o, don’t catch. He’ll whisper about how grateful he is for them and how they make life seem a little less daunting. It’s hard to be completely romantic without being vulnerable… and he will be-- just for a second.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

It depends on the goal. Considering that his own goal, he has no right to call anyone else’s goal out of the ordinary. He does have strong opinions, and if he feels his s/o’s goal truly is out of reach he will say so. Aside from being opinionated, Erwin can help set plans and will hold his s/o to timelines. If they are serious about reaching said goal, he’s going to enforce whatever deadlines he can to make sure they are held accountable. He does this both to encourage responsibility and see his s/o thrive.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

When he was younger, Erwin liked to go out of his way and be spontaneous. This involved riding out into the forest during ungodly hours of the night and breaking into thieves' hideouts to see if they could find anything interesting. Of course, he disguised those excursions under the flat excuse of ‘real life training’ but in fact, he just desired some sort of excitement. 

Later on in life, Erwin much prefers to stay true to a routine as much as he can. Due to his work, he can’t expect most days to go according to plan, therefore, he values having structure in his personal life. 

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

To even get into a relationship with Erwin, he needs to know a good amount about the person of interest. He’s suspicious and not easily swayed by others, so it gives him peace of mind to feel that he knows his s/o well, even if he doesn’t give them the same courtesy. Erwin is empathetic to a degree. He will not feel his partner’s emotions deeply, rather he will try to understand and respond appropriately, especially in sensitive times.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

His relationship with his s/o is more important than he lets on. They’re one of his reasons for living-- a fact  he will never outwardly admit. Erwin’s a loyal man, so his loyalty to his s/o is unquestionable. Sadly, his mission to ‘save humanity’ will always take precedence over them. 

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

When he’s had a notably stressful day, he wants to come home and sleep in his lover’s arms. It’s easy to convince him to sit in a bath and rub his shoulders. He’s susceptible to showing a little more affection than usual. He’ll entertain kisses down his shoulder and share tales from his childhood. If he’s tired enough, his s/o could even convince him to imagine a future (wild, I know).

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Erwin thinks he’s affectionate. He’s not opposed to his s/o wanting affection, and when he’s proud or feeling good, he will show it. As mentioned before, he’s touching his s/o in some way in public, even if it’s not conventionally intimate. When the two are alone, he likes having them in his lap as he peppers their jaw and collar with hot kisses. Oh, the mouth on this man-- hopefully his s/o enjoys being nipped, because there’s no stopping him.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He looks at it logically. Either he dies before he sees them, or he’ll see them and they can enjoy one another’s company. There’s no point in pondering.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Yes, and no. Erwin’s already going through ‘great lengths’ for his mission. He uses this and says he is fighting for them, though the truth in the statement is debatable.

#erwin smith #erwin smith x reader #attack on titan #attack on titan imagines #attack on titan headcanons #shingeki no kyojin headcanons #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyojin imagines #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #fluff alphabet

[magnoliapip]

Potential Open Heart Love Interests Who Were Wasted

By now, we all understand that Pixelberry has wasted every single fragment of potential that the Open Heart series had. Frequently overshadowed by aimless plotlines and unbalanced attention toward the four love interests we had is the vast array of potential love interests the OH series could have had. This list is the top 10 (yes, 10) love interests PB wasted. This means that this list will not be discussing the wasted potential in the four love interests we were handed (Bryce, Jackie, Rafael and Ethan).

Please note that some of these (especially toward the bottom) are included more for fan service than for actual wasted potential. Also, these are all my own opinions. Please feel free to share your own! There may be spoilers below. Viewer discretion is advised!

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#10 -- Baz Mirani

Not introduced until Book 2 of the Open Heart series, Baz is the friendlier and more outgoing of the two Doctors Mirani. One of the top in his field of immunology, Baz manages to balance his intellect with an easygoing nature. A relaxed positivity that almost comes off as too much. He was never really around enough, nor did he have the right interactions with MC in the series to feel like a fully developed love interest. However, after having the options in another PB book Laws of Attraction, it might have been interesting to see how it would turn out if MC could hook up with Baz.

#9 -- June Hirata

Also not introduced until Book 2, Dr. Hirata is a ruthless force to be reckoned with. A cunning behavior psychologist and brilliant neurologist, one can never really know what to expect from June, though this is mostly because no one can tell if her actions are genuine. After MC is told how June “earned” her place on the diagnostics team, it becomes clear that she will stop at nothing to get what she wants. Honestly, the prospect of having that directed toward MC...yeah, I want it. Badly. The only reason she isn’t higher on the list is because of her social inconsistency..

#8 -- Zaid Mirani

One of two senior residents introduced to the MC in book 1, Zaid is partly responsible for managing the interns. Zaid is the more blunt of the Mirani twins and can come off as an ass. He’s also shown to have a softer side that comes out in increasing increments throughout the series culminating in a touching moment in book 3. Once more, Zaid isn’t someone the MC interacts with a whole lot throughout the books, acting more as a recurring character to pop up once or twice a book, but I think that is a crock. I wanted more Zaid and I’m sorry we didn’t get it.

#7 -- Elijah Greene

A fellow intern at Edenbrook Hospital, MC meets Elijah in book 1 along with the rest of their group of friends. Elijah quickly becomes a steadfast friend and even a roommate. Clearly a brilliant doctor with a future in research, Elijah balances this with his upbeat personality and love of science fiction and gaming. Characters like Elijah often get relegated to the realm of being a best friend and it might have been nice to see him opened up as a possible love interest. He’s fiercely loyal, as seen by his defense in book 2 at the baseball game, and is steadfastly determined to get where he wants to be. There’s a lot to be admired in Elijah, but considering PB dropped his canon love interest, Phoebe, I shouldn’t be surprised that he was never an option anyway.

#6 -- Sienna Trinh

Sienna is literally the best.

I should just end it there because anyone who has read the series knows, but for the sake of this list…Sienna is an ally of MC’s right from the moment they meet, when Sienna helps get MC out of a sticky situation. This perfectly encompasses Sienna’s character. She spends the entire series taking care of everyone but herself and being just the sweetest, kindest, most amazing baker and chinchilla mommy that exists. After what happens in book 1 and book 2 with both of her canon love interests, well, #Siennadeservesbetter. And I think her fellow dolphin would have been the perfect person for her. 

The only reason she is so far down on the list is because she does make such an incredible best friend.

#5 -- Harper Emery

The female older mentor to match Ethan. Harper would have been in a more compromised position, not just being a direct superior to MC like Ethan, but also being the Chief of Medicine for the hospital. As an admin, watching her toe the line between desire and propriety would have been just *chef’s kiss*. Instead, her role was consigned to being the family member too hard on their younger charge, projecting what she wants but can’t have onto Aurora. Now that I think about it, that last sentence makes me want it even more.

Besides, it would have been another female love interest rather than the one that we seem to get every book and a woman of color at that.

#4 -- Landry Olsen

I know what you’re thinking but just hear me out for a second and then you can eviscerate me in the comments.

Landry is a character that has me torn in more ways than one. First, I love the twist in book 1 where we see him for who he “truly is”. It was unexpected and a lovely change.

That notwithstanding, I was also deeply saddened to see yet another promising story not come to pass. See, there aren’t many characters like Landry who are so incredibly awkward but also come off as friendly. It was a lovely change of pace and it would have been amazing, just the sweetest, to see MC bring Landry out of his shell. MC could have helped Landry gain confidence to do far more than talk to the girl across the bar. Before the end of the book, he would have been having a full ass conversation with Ethan and maybe even mustering up the bravery to ask MC out. All of the pieces were there, either as platonic friend or love interest. Instead, Landry lived long enough to see himself become the villain. But my friends to lovers slowburn adoring heart will always have a piece longing for what could have been. Judge me if you will.

#3 -- Tobias Carrick

Originally introduced in book 2 to be to Ethan what Mass Kenmore is to Edenbrook, Tobias’ story takes a flip once book 3 comes around. Immediately compelling from the get go, Tobias shows a charming competitive nature sprinkled with arrogance, grey morality, and a devilish side. Tobias’ personality would either be completely in line with MC or completely against MC depending on how you tend to play the game. Both are completely valid and interesting options. Even before the infamous beet puns in book 3, Tobias made me want to know more. Tobias was the ultimate character in the Open Heart series that would have made a perfect one night stand. Alas, it seems we’ll never know more and must stick to the fantastic fanfiction writers on sites like this to sate us.

#2 -- Aurora Emery

Let me tell you, the line between #’s 1 and 2 is so thin it’s barely there. Those two are so close I almost can’t distinguish which one I wanted more. Aurora is first presented to MC and the gang as an intern who seems like she may become an antagonist of the series. As Book 1 presses on, we start to see Aurora in a whole new light. MC comes to understand why Aurora has the cold and closed off personality she does and when given the chances later in the series, Aurora opens up into almost an entirely different person as she finds herself outside of the expectations of her family.

Aurora is a brilliant doctor very nearly on the same level as MC and later seems to become a parallel to MC for what Tobias is to Ethan. Thankfully Aurora and MC’s relationship is a lot less volatile, but those brief fireworks make me really wish Aurora and MC would have officially been a thing. I feel like PB was weighing the option for a while but decided against it, much to their detriment.

However, I had to push Aurora down for one specific reason to come in the explanation for #1. And #1 is…

#1 -- Farley the Landlord

Be honest. After having Landry on this list, you thought this was a serious entry for a second, didn’t you? Just kidding!

(the real) #1 -- Kyra Santana

Kyra meets MC for the first time when Ethan dubiously introduces her to them because Kyra broke her arm in an accident. Right from the start, Kyra is an incorrigible flirt, obviously egged on by her cancer diagnosis and fear of death. Kyra has such an incredible story. Throughout books 1 and 2, Kyra is an incredible friend to MC and it breaks my heart that PB dropped her romantic storyline the way they did.

This is why Kyra edged out Aurora for #1. Going back and re-reading book 1, it’s always obvious that Kyra was meant to be a love interest. I’m not sure what stopped them from going forward with it. I’d like to think it had something to do with potential backlash for having a patient and their doctor get involved, but I think it has more to do with being a woman or a woman of color than anything else. Which is a damned shame. We stan Kyra Santana in this house and I wanted to leave with her at the end of book 2.

----

So what do you all think? Do you agree with any of my placements? Vehemently disagree with others? I wrote this at 2am when I couldn’t sleep and didn’t bother to proofread before posting so you’re welcome.

Let me know below and cross your fingers for the finale of Open Heart book 3 coming later today!!

#open heart #choices open heart #sienna trinh #elijah greene #tobias carrick #harper emery #aurora emery #kyra santana #landry olsen #zaid mirani #baz mirani #june hirata

[curly-bangtan]

Heatwave Drabble #5: for the birthday boy (M)

[Heatwave // Godless // Heatwave Drabbles]

Pairing: Taehyung x reader

Summary: For Taehyung’s birthday, you’ve planned a special surprise-filled evening just for him as his best friend by day, fuck buddy by night. But especially after a few drinks, he finds it difficult keeping his hands off you, which isn’t a good thing in front of all your friends.

Genre: drabble, smut, fwb au, roommate au, f2l

Warnings: teacher/student roleplay (if you’re not into that, just skip to the next scene, it’s meant to be slightly sarcastic anyway), brief lap dance, oral (m&f), overstimulation (m&f), unprotected sex (your girl finally invested in the pill yay), cum dumpster, facial, cum play and consumption, squirting, basically filth, light BDSM like spanking, handcuffs, choking, the usual, daddy kink (you know HW!Tae)

Word count: 11.3k yikes

A/N: Happy early birthday to the best boy! Why do I call these drabbles when it’s basically a series at this point smh -_- Enjoy this filthy monster~

.

“Surprise! Happy Birthday!”

Taehyung jumps beside you as you switch on the lights to your flat, illuminating the room full of people leap out from their hiding place at his arrival. The last syllable of their celebratory chant hangs in the air for an awkward moment as he takes in everything you put together for his birthday surprise.

Shiny party streamers decorating the walls, black and gold balloons bobbing against the ceiling, printed photos of your best memories together hanging from shelf to shelf, all his and your closest friends gathered to greet him. And of course, the impeccable two-layered strawberry chocolate sponge cake sitting on a platter that you know would excite him the most.

A smile spreads his mouth wide and square as he turns to you, his cheeks bundling up like rising bread in sheer elation.

“No you didn’t, Y/N.”

Then you’re being suffocated in a bone-crushing hug, your ribs almost cracking under his snake-like squeeze. His chest rumbles in the most boyish giggle.

“Hap-pee-burf-day-” You manage to utter as you move your arms between two to create some space for you to breathe.

Seeing Taehyung this happy, especially knowing you’re the cause of it, is truly a feeling matched by no other. You don’t have a massive squadron of friends, you are more the type to carefully select those you actually like and get along with. To put it badly, you’re picky, judgy and quite a bitch when it comes to making friends. But the few you actually care about, you love ferociously and passionately, willing to cut off your own limb for them. And Taehyung is at the top of that list.

“You’re actually the best, I love you.” When he finally lets you go from his painful but appreciated embrace, his hands rest on your waist, lingering.

You had just treated him to a birthday dinner at his favourite steakhouse, roommate to roommate, in order to enable this surprise party. A few pints might have been downed for the occasion, which explains his excessive touching. Taehyung has never been able to hold his liquor, always a lightweight. The number of times you’ve had to half-carry half-drag him out of a club and stick your fingers down his throat in a dark alley is truly embarrassing for him.

“I am the best. You’re lucky I love you too, dork.” With his nostrils flaring from excitement, you can’t help but pinch his nose before turning to the guests and properly starting the party.

To be honest, you wouldn’t have been able to pull it off without the help of anyone else. His parents have come to town to visit him during the day, so off he went to show them around the food market, the park and his favourite vintage stores. Which gave you plenty of time to set up the house, prepare the refreshments, and buy the birthday cake. But keeping him from returning home was a feat that you had to enlist his parents’ aid in, and ever the obedient son, Taehyung of course did not argue when his folks disagreed with his suggestion to go back to the apartment. Then, it was a matter of taking him to dinner, deftly urging him to meet you there rather than going together from the flat so not to miss your reservation. The rounds of alcohol and your tiny bladder slyly masked the many bathroom runs you took in order to text Lotta to gather everyone to your place. And when everything was set, you headed back with the clueless Taehyung, giddy with a belly full of Michelin star food.

It was purely out of your headstrong resistance that you two didn’t stumble into the apartment making out, exposing your on-going debauchery to all your unaware friends. He had begun to feel you up on the way home, grabbing your ass one too many times for it to be merely playful. Honestly, it’s never easy rejecting his advances, not with your nymphomaniac track record anyway. But tonight was especially difficult, knowing what you have planned for him after the party…

From the corner of your eye you see Taehyung chattering away with friends from his class, and from the way he’s waving his hands around, you can tell it’s about the latest Christmas horror story of the two of you trying to stuff a turkey.

The memory of you yelling at each other to grab-this-grab-that warms your chest more than the white wine you’re sipping on. It’s always these stupid anecdotes that mean the most.

“Looks like he’s enjoying himself.”

Lotta’s voice startles you from your thoughts. Hands held behind her shyly, she smiles at the sight of the outburst of laughter from the guests at his story.

Aside from Taehyung, you would say she’s your best friend, having gone to the same highschool together and now the same university. You knew you would be close the moment she told you her star sign - there isn’t a more iconic duo than an Aries and a Leo. She puts up with a lot of your shit but also isn’t afraid to scream some sense into you whenever you pull something rogue, which you guess is very often.

“Yep. He should probably stop drinking though.” You say as you watch him tip the contents of his glass down his throat. “I swear to god if he throws up on the couch, I’ll chop his dick off.” Of course you wouldn’t, how could you ever bring yourself to hurt that godsent meatstick that fuck tears out of you? You both giggle nonetheless.

“You’re funny with him.” Lotta is wearing a smug expression that you distinctly dislike.

“What do you mean?”

“You act like he’s some annoying brother who you hate, but then you go and take him to this boujee-ass steakhouse, throw him a surprise party and splash out on his birthday gift. You beat him up when he uses your shampoo, kick him when he accidentally scrunches up your notes, and threaten to emasculate him if he spills alcohol on your favourite couch that you treat like your newborn child. But you secretly care so much about him that I know you’d give him your kidney if he needed one.”

You blink at her.

Not quite sure what to say.

“Well, yeah, of course I care about him. Like you said, he’s a brother to me.” Okay, but do you let someone who’s just a brother to you cum on your face? “You don’t live with him so you don’t know what a useless brat he is. He burns pasta, Lotta. Pasta. Seriously, he’s such a dipshit, but of course I care about him. What’s funny about that?” Lying straight through your teeth is a Y/N specialty. As long as you say it with enough confidence, you can sell any bullshit.

But maybe you’re sounding a little defensive.

Lotta is clever, it is why you’re friends. Where this observation of hers is headed, you’re unsure of. She could turn this into a lecture about your abrasive personality, or suspect that something else is going on between you and Taehyung other than sharing rent.

“Nothing, I just said it was funny. The way you are.” Her smile tells you that it’s probably the former of the two possibilities.

“What can I say, I’m a funny person.” Not entirely buying it though, you shrug and play along.

Another bout of laughter breaks out from Taehyung and his friends, catching both your attentions. He thrives in social situations like these, good at entertaining people with his odd humour. You watch the flash of his teeth, the crinkle of his amused eyes, tongue flicking out to wet his lips every other sentence.

“You know, he actually is really hot.” Now, that you didn’t expect at all. Your head whips to face your best friend, whose eyes fixes back on yours but not before you catch her checking him out.

“Um, what?”

“I’m just saying. You can’t deny that he’s gorgeous, charming too.” Brows raised, Lotta lifts both hands up in defense when she see the arrows your glare is shooting at her. “Definitely the best looking guy I’ve ever seen.”

“You’re drunk. Since when did you admit that Taehyung is ‘hot’?” In complete ridicule, you scoff at her. Though, her point is completely 100% valid and true.

“Do you see me with a drink? I’m sober tonight, got an early shift tomorrow.”

“Why are you suddenly saying this? Weren’t you the one who wouldn’t shut up when I went to Mykonos with him because you thought I was too blinded by his looks to even know if he’s a serial killer?” Never has Lotta expressed the slightest, most remote of interest in Taehyung, not once properly acknowledging his attractiveness.

“I’m just saying. It’s a shame that you can’t see him that way anymore after spending so much time together.” It’s her turn to shrug, again with the annoying cocky expression.

Yes, after spending so much time sleeping together, more like.

“Yeah, no. That’s gross. You won’t get it because you don’t have a guy best friend. But trust me, no way would I ever go there with him.” Go ahead and call you a pathological liar, you don’t care. You’d never hear the end of it if Lotta finds out you and your ‘guy best friend’ have been knocking boots for over half a year.

You catch Taehyung glancing over to you, eyes twinkling with amusement, signalling for you to come over and join his crowd. Telepathy is one of your secret talents nowadays, you just know each other so well that spoken words are not a necessity for communication.

Taehyung watches you manoeuvre past those chattering bodies from across the room, making your way towards him with Lotta trailing behind. He knows he is definitely drunk, so it might just be the alcohol getting to his head but something looks a little different about you tonight. By that, he doesn’t mean your curled hair, or that new red dress you’re wearing that introduces your cleavage to the entire world. You’re kind of… glowing. There is a permanent smile on your face, even while resting the corners of your lips are turned up. And when you’re in a good mood, you are so transparent about it that you basically radiate like a disco ball in the room.

His chest feels warm. Maybe it’s the wine.

“Fuck, she’s so fit.”

For a second, Taehyung is worried that he thought out loud, but then realised that the voice belonged to Seojoon. He turns to his friend to find him ogling at your figure.

He doesn’t know what to say. It’s weird if he agrees. But he also doesn’t trust his inebriated state to execute a flat out lie that convincingly.

“You don’t know how lucky you are to have Y/N as your roommate, man. If it were me, I would’ve tapped that on the first night.” Seojoon continues, taking a swig of his beer.

“As if you could.” Taehyung snorts, unable to help himself. “She’s out of your league, ass.”

“Fair point. I heard she is a freak in bed, too. Do you ever hear, like, sex noises?” A freak indeed.

“Sometimes…” It’s true, even now. Occasionally he will stumble home with a girl he picked up at the bar only to hear the bed creaking furiously or breathy moans sounding from your room. Walls are thin. Sometimes it turned him on, other times it pissed him off.

“Bet you wank to it, eh? Taehyungie?” Seojoon ruffles his hair just as you and Lotta come within earshot. Liquor-brazen, he is suddenly overcome with an urge to announce to the whole room: Y/N and I are fucking. Yeah, that’s right. She’s my fuck buddy, so you can stop trying to hit on her right now because I’m gonna be the one she’s riding tonight. Seojoon, fucking suck on that. I don’t need to wank to her sex noises when I’m the one coaxing them from her.

However, a small sober part of his conscience tells him that he really shouldn’t do that; if he does, he probably won’t get any riding tonight. So he clamps his mouth shut.

You arrive amidst them in that sinful dress that reduces Taehyung to a teenage boy, and you take your turn giving them brief hugs as formalities, your best friend beside you mirroring your action. When you reach Taehyung, he pulls you in roughly by the waist, wine sloshing in his hand. From his careless force and lazy grin, you can tell he is almost completely gone. Taehyung is a wine-killer, but wine is also a Taehyung-killer.

Highly conscious of the presence of all your mates while he clearly isn’t, you pretend to roll your eyes and pry his hand off the small of your back. It doesn’t budge. So, awkwardly, with your midriff locked in Taehyung’s arm, you lean over to hug his last friend Woosik who gives you a shy pat on your shoulder.

The conversation resumes, morphing into Lotta telling everyone the most embarrassing stories of you during high school - back when you had braces and had the biggest crush on the captain of the football team. You don’t even try to deny it, laughing along at your pathetic 14 year old self. Though, you’re only half paying attention, the other half is keenly aware of the way Taehyung’s thumb is rubbing gentle circles on your pelvic bone. When you peek up at him, you find him already staring at you with eyes you know too well.

The ‘I’m gonna eat you out until you squirt’ eyes.

Fuck.

Then you notice Lotta’s sharp eyes on Taehyung’s hand gripping your waist. The ‘hold up, what could be happening over here?’ eyes.

Double fuck.

Tipping your toes, you whisper into your roommate’s clueless ear. “Let go, people are watching.” You almost allow your lips to graze his skin because you know how much it turns him on, but you remember to behave. But this close, his warm familiar scent tingles your nose in a way that makes you want to hug him.

Taehyung pulls away to look at your face, clearly displeased, then regards everyone in the circle. When he notices Lotta’s focus on the two of you, he slowly withdraws his paw, but not without purposely brushing past your ass.

.

“Strawberry-flavoured lube?”

Taehyung audibly gasps in disbelief as he tears open his poorly wrapped present.

“Yeah, you like strawberries right?” Seojoon chuckles and claps his back so violently that he falls forwards. On the other side of him, you haul him back up onto the sofa.

Everyone is gathered around the pile of birthday gifts on the coffee table, but not before witnessing you scold Woosik for not leaving his drink on the kitchen island from which the couch is a safe distance to prevent any spillage. Lotta just laughed at your fixation.

So far, the array of presents Taehyung has received ranges from Amazon vouchers, to expensive whiskey, to a funky tie. Yours sit furthest away from him, which he practically leapt in excitement when he saw the size of, only to be forced to open it last because you insist it’s going to be the best one.

“You’re insufferable, Seojoon.” Taehyung rolls his eyes yet fails to suppress his grin. Oh, you’re definitely trying out the lube at some point.

After ripping into a couple more, he finally arrives at your present for him. It spans an entire arm’s length; you know every guest must be wondering to themselves what it could possibly be. Taehyung drops onto his knees before it and carefully peels away the tape this time, knowing it probably took you awhile to wrap it up this neatly. You watch his long cautious fingers reveal the gift you had spent weeks raking your head for.

“Stop…” His eyes light up at the polished cedar easel that he caresses over as gentle as he would your skin. But as he continues to unwrap the present, a box of oil paints, a wooden palette and a set of 16 expensive natural fibre brushes are unveiled. “Oh my god, there’s more?”

Ceasing in action, he looks up at you, jaw so slack you bet you can throw a pea into his mouth even with your bad aim. The surprise on his face, almost a replica of his expression when everyone jumped out at him and yelled ‘Happy Birthday’ an hour ago. Except this time there is something more tender about how his wide pupils bore into yours. It makes you squirm.

Then without warning, he dives onto you, crushing you in the most fatal of embraces; you swear something in your spine cracked as you fall back onto the cushions, suffocated. People let out a sound of amusement at your struggle, but with his warm breath fanning your neck, you don’t even hear them.

After allowing this sweet painful moment for a few seconds more, you shove Taehyung’s heavy body off you, harder than you need so he slumps onto Seojoon.

“You’re actually the best, I love you.” He squeals like a boy on Christmas day before examining the paintbrushes with the utmost careful touch, as if afraid he would bend the bristles the wrong way.

What is he so cute for?

You kind of really want to pat his head and kiss his cheek right now. But there’s an audience obstructing.

Looking up, you lock eyes with Lotta. She is smiling, endeared by the purity of his reaction as well. See, not even she is immune his stupid cuteness. How are you supposed to?

Taehyung’s heart is constricting as he strokes the fine wooden edge of the giant disassembled easel. Of course, you know him better than any of his other friends. He has recently expressed an interest in painting, though his love for art and sophistication has been harbouring for a while now. He has only ever made subtle comments about wanting to properly get into it but not having the proper equipment to and not knowing the best brand to purchase. Yet you had picked up on it nevertheless. Everything combined must have costed you a significant portion of your allowance. Even he would not have splashed out this much on himself.

He turns back to you again from where he kneels in front of the coffee table. You are observing him with a thing he wishes to be adoration, a glimmer in your smile that wears more beautiful than any dress on you. For a second, there’s a flutter in his stomach and it confuses him because it feels an awful lot like butterflies.

But then you kick his back with the heel of your foot to get him to stand and Taehyung remembers that you are best friends. He’s not supposed to be thinking like that.

.

After cutting the cake, with food being a major satisfaction factor of any party, everyone sort of just hovers, huddled in their little groups with their plate of dessert in one hand, while they resume their conversation. The music is turned up loud so they all have to half-yell; some don’t even bother talking as they dig in, you included.

Being a quiet eater that you are, you stand by the island counter, sipping your wine in between bites of that chocolate decadence. Taehyung approaches you with his already empty plate; you haven’t even made it through half your slice yet. Judging by the lethargy in his step and that icing-slathered grin he has worn the entire night, you can tell he was the one who finished the second bottle of wine you opened.

“Hey.” Your fingers do a weird little wave that is so completely uncharacteristic, but tipsy-Y/N is sort of that friendly and laid back.

“Hey, pretty.” His hand trails around the corner of the counter surface and traps you between it and his body as he comes up behind you. Immediately you stiffen, looking around to see if anyone, especially Lotta, is looking. But when you find everyone preoccupied either with each other or the cake, your shoulders relax.

“What’s up? You having a good time?” Twisting to face him, you edge back until the counter digs into your back. Taehyung’s face is a dangerous proximity to yours.

The anticipation for the night you have planned for him in your bedroom thrums in your core. Patience has never been one of your strengths, and right now it is testing your very limit. You could kick everyone out right now if you really wanted to. But you won’t. You’ll wait.

You wipe the chocolate off the corner of his mouth with a swipe, the gesture you can’t tell if motherly or romantic. And just because Taehyung is peering down at you so longingly, you flick your tongue out and suck the sweetness on your thumb.

His breath hitches.

“Uh- I…” For a second, all thought is scattered in his brain, and you almost laugh aloud at how susceptible he is to your attacks. “Yeah, of course. I’m having the best time.”

“Am I the best roommate ever or what?” You watch his eyes trained on your mouth. From his alcohol scent, you don’t trust him to have enough restraint not to kiss you right now so you turn your back to him and rest your elbows upon the island top, leaning over to finish your cake.

In your peripheral vision, you spy his hands crawling towards your sides to cinch around your waist, his front pressing into you as he holds you from behind. The warmth of his body seeps into your back, and you swear you can feel the beating of his chest against your shoulder blades. A tingle shoots straight down your spine when he plants a soft, brief kiss on the shell of your ear.

Good thing you turned around then, your intuition was right. Taehyung has never been able to suppress his overt affection after a few drinks, and certainly not after this many. And no matter how much you want to just turn around and pull him into your lips, you fight it.

“Babe...” He groans into your ear and though it was barely audible even to you, you quickly glance up to see if anyone has heard. Of course, no one heard, they are all stood far enough that even without the music, they’d have to strain their ears to hear his whisper. Paranoia is eating your head away.

“Don’t ‘babe’ me, Taehyung.” Your heart is racing, which is weird because you swear you used to be completely immune to his charms. “You’re being too obvious, babe.”

“You don’t ‘babe’ me. I can’t control myself when you call me that.” The warmth of his breath fans all over the back of your neck, sending a convulsion of shivers down your spine.

One of his hands stretches for your wine glass, but knowing him well enough to predict it, you draw it away from his reach. “Stop drinking, you’re literally about to pass out.”

“No, you’re about to pass out. On my-” hiccup, “dick.” You keep your eyes locked on the crowd, ready to shove Taehyung away if anyone looks your way. But still, you can’t help but lean back into him.

“That made no sense.” You chuckle, fingers brushing over the smooth thin skin of this hand.

“Just one sip.”

“Taehyung. Stop. Drinking.” You grab his hand that tries to make a run for the wine again.

“But, Y/N…” He whines and slumps onto you, knowing that whining has gotten him what he wanted before.

You turn around, grab his face and pull him towards you until your mouth is brushing his earlobe. “Be a good boy and stop drinking if you want the best birthday sex of your life after this party. You better not get whiskey dick because a have a lot planned for you.”

At that, Taehyung stops breathing, stops resisting. Against your shoulder, you feel his chest jump. “Oh. Um. Okay, yup, no more drinking. Got it, ma’am.”

He sighs, completely at your disposal, as your touch trails from the sensitive side of his neck down to his torso. “Good.” After looking around again to check that no one is looking, you press your alcohol-infused lips onto his hastily, savouring his softness for no longer than a few seconds before pulling away. God, is it difficult to pull away. You’re aching for him. “Go entertain the guests while you sober up.”

Satisfied grin from the kiss stretched across his face, he nods obediently and scampers over to his friends.

.

“Are you ready yet?” Taehyung calls, impatient and giddy, the music that you’ve put on playing softly in the background.

“Give me one more second.” You reply from the bathroom, doing up your last button and regarding yourself in the mirror. Hm, not bad. You’re pleased with how this turned out, if you do say so yourself. Taehyung is going to lose his mind.

Sheer black stockings stretched thin over your legs, you strut into his room where he is seated on a chair in nothing but his boxers, wrists shackled to the back. When his eyes land on you, a strangled noise emits from his throat.

“Holy. Fuck. Holy fuck. Holyfuckholyfuckholyfuck.” He chokes out.

The checkered material of your school skirt flies up at your every step teasingly, not high enough for him to peek your panties, but enough for your thighs to be flaunted.The clip of your stockings sit cool and beguiling on your quads. First two buttons of your white blouse undone, the matching red tartan tie hangs loosely around your neck between your exposed, pushed up cleavage. Your hair is tied into two school-girl braids, decorated in ribbons.

You’re Taehyung’s walking talking fantasy.

Innocent, chaste, ready for him to defile.

“Sir.” You address him, committing to your character, as you bow your head in courtesy.

Taehyung doesn’t appear capable of words, Adam’s apple wobbling in awe. So you continue your approach, making sure to regard him with large, demure eyes. As you sink down onto your knees between his widespread trembling legs, you notice a prominence already erecting in his boxers. You try not to smirk.

“What can I do for you, sir?” You put on your sweetest, most virgin of voices and bat your lashes once at him.

Chest rising quickly, Taehyung gulps as he realises that he’s most definitely going about to have the best sex of his life. “Um. Uh. Um.”

Smiling at his malfunctioning cognition, no thanks to you, you decide to help him out a little. “I’ve been sent to you for being a bad girl, sir.”

Do you find this slightly humiliating and degrading? Yes, you’re a woman of pride and a feminist. But does Taehyung’s birthday outweigh your morals? Yes, if only just for this night.

“What… What did you do, baby girl?” Voice dangerously deep, Taehyung watches you from his handcuffed posture, watches you twirl your braids in your fingers before they move sensual down your front, curving over your breasts and travelling to your core.

“It’s embarrassing to say but…” You look down in feign shame. “I touched myself.”

His whole frame tenses, arms straining to be freed from the cuffs so he can throw you onto the bed and fuck you mercilessly. His lips are parted, breath unsteady, cheeks still slightly stained from the alcohol but you made sure that he’s mostly sober by now. “Why did you touch yourself?”

“I was thinking about you, sir, and I just couldn’t help myself. Something started tickling down there and it felt so good to touch it.” Biting your lip, your fingers reach your clit over your skirt and start rubbing. The other hand traces swirls slowly up his thighs, higher and higher, until he’s buckling his hips.

“Wait, pause.” He says, your touch ceasing at his command. “Fuck, Y/N, I’m not going to last if you do this to me. I might even cum my pants.”

Usual smugness returning as you smirk up at him, your teeth digs deeper into your lower lip, refusing to break character. “Well, it’s a good thing we have all night then, sir. A water hose doesn’t just fire once does it?”

“Fuck.” Shutting his eyes, his head falls back to reveal his gulping jugular. Already so malleable? Yeah, he’s definitely not going to last. The first round. “Okay, okay. Resume.”

Your fingers reach the hem of his boxers, skimming through his tan, lustrous inner thighs. He jerks, his hard member jabbing out the soft cotton, begging to be freed. “So I was wondering if there is any way I could get out of this punishment, sir. My parents can’t find out that I’ve been a bad girl. I’ll do anything you want me to do, sir.”

“I see, Miss Y/L/N… How about, you warm up my lap for me first? I’m feeling slightly cold.” He wets his lips and bounces on his toes, his hard length jolting along with his legs.

“Oh, of course, sir.” When you stand up, you make sure to do it slowly, curving your body towards him to give him a good look at your breasts. He doesn’t miss the chance to devour them with his eyes.

Your hips begin to sway in the rhythm of the slow sensual music while you turn until your back faces him. You feel his glare immediate follow your ass, skirt sloshing side to side to reveal your plush cheeks. But rather than falling onto his lap as he wants, you stride over his leg, hand trailing across his chest as you begin to walk around him.

Massaging up his bicep, your hand arrives at his collar as you lick a thin strip up his neck. Taehyung shudders, struggling against his handcuffs again, cursing. “I can do anything you want me to, sir.” He shivers as you whisper into his ear, teeth grazing his skin. Your own heart is racing from excitement. Maybe you should do this more often. It’s selfish of you to do so since it’s meant to be his birthday sex after all, but you enjoy having him helt under you, seconds away from whimpering, gone be his natural preference for dominance.

As you walk around him, his head turns with you, not wishing for his sight to miss a second of this private show. Patience isn’t something he’s born with, he is a man who’s used to ceasing everything he wants. You know what must be going through his head right now, the anticipation, the hunger. So finally, when you’ve done a full circle around, hands not once missing the opportunity to feather his chest, you decide to ease him a little.

Deliberately unrushed, you sit inch by inch down onto his lap until his dick is burrowed between your warm cheeks underneath your skirt.

“Baby…” Taehyung immediately sits up, mouth arriving at the back of your neck, exhaling his hot fervour. The feeling of his skin pressed on the strip of yours between your skirt and cropped blouse has you craving for him to pound into you right now. Nothing can describe the flash of desire you get when you feel the touch of his naked body.

Then you begin to roll your hips, drawing loops of infinity with your ass to the beat of the song. The groan you elicit makes your cunt pulse. Taehyung’s stiff length jerks between your wiggling ass. His head falls onto your shoulder in a huff, metallic sound of his chains ringing as his arms clench.

“Sir, is that warm enough?” Your hips are merciless, rock back and forth, providing him with the friction he so craves. Hell, maybe you should start doing this for a living.

“Y… Yeah.” There is defeat in his voice, a croak that tells you that you’re the only woman to ever put him in his place like this. The only he’d ever submit to.

Slowly, you peel yourself off his lap, delighting in the small stained spot on his boxers, evidence of his drooling dick. You sink onto your knees before him again, fingers crawling playfully up his thighs. “You seem a little stiff, sir. Do you want me to ease some tension in your muscles for you?”

“Please be a dear.” The fervour in his eyes as he gazes down at you is pure, undiluted. It stirs something beastly inside you.

You’ve sucked Taehyung off a hundred times before, but something about the fact that he’s handcuffed to a chair on his birthday, almost cumming his pants, makes you especially eager this time.

A string of precum greets you as you take his lividly throbbing cock out of its restraints. You spare it a few pumps before you enclose the warm wet cave of your mouth around it. It’s perhaps evil of you, but you cut to the chase and go straight to deep-throating. He lets out a yelp of surprise when his tip slides smoothly through and hits the back of your throat. He’s going to cum soon, might as well give him your all, right?

Your mouth has gotten used to resisting the gag reflexes by now, engulfing him like a strawberry ice lolly during the summer heat. The occasional scrape of your teeth, just the way he loves, has him shiver beneath you. If he likes it rough, he should be able to take it rough. And when your tongue begins its inexorable attack at the pinch of skin where his tip ties to his shaft, Taehyung lets out a throaty cry. Not even a moan, a cry.

“Fuck, I’m losing my mind. Y/N, oh my god, keep going.” Through your curled lashes, you gaze up at him. His brows furrowed, guzzling up his favourite view in the world, maybe second to you riding him. Jaw unscrewed, he heaves at your large feign-innocent eyes, wrists dying to be freed so he could fuck your mouth.

Two throbs at the base of his cock, and he’s cumming right down your throat. It’s a larger load that either of you’d expected, telling of his obscene concupiscence. There’s so much cum that you can’t swallow, so you have no choice but to let it flow down his cock. With you still staring at him, he watches his white hot fluid dribble out your mouth and onto him, his features screwed tight in pleasure.

“Lick it off, baby.” Taehyung rasps, half his mind completely gone, dilapidated.

You hum as you spread his liquid around his tip and along his shaft, lips now glossy, before you slowly lap it all up. You know he is particularly sensitive after cumming, so you wallow in teasing his head a bit more, watching him writhe on his seat, whining your name. “Sir, how was that?”

Taehyung’s head is tossed back, eyes shut to recover from that post-orgasm intensity. He doesn’t speak at first, still trying to piece back together his mind. “I… That was… You deserve a worse punishment for doing that to me.”

Your core twists in excitement.

Briskly, you fish out the key to his handcuffs and unlock him, thrumming from the molten fury in his eyes. “What did I do wrong, sir?”

As soon as his wrists are free from their shackles, Taehyung stands and throws you over his shoulders. Smack. He hits your ass, your skirt doing little to soften the blow. You never knew yourself to be a masochist until it comes to Taehyung; his are the only hands you’d allow to spank you.

Then he tosses you onto the bed, your skirt flying up to reveal your peachy ass as you land on your front. “You just love it when I’m under your control, don’t you? Even this innocent school-girl roleplay is just a disguise to get me to beg for you, isn’t it?”

Twisting your head back, a smirk plays at your lips as you regard his frustrated yet immensely pleased expression. His fingers glide up your silky stockings enticingly, sending shivers coursing up your legs. “Sir, I have no idea what you mean.”

“Look at your fucking ass in this skirt, holy fuck.” He begins to knead the supple flesh of your behind, pushing up the skirt until it sit on your lower back.

Another smack.

He’s such an ass man through and through.

“Do you like my uniform, sir?” You moan between his smacks. Nothing really is compelling you to continue with this roleplay, but something tells you that Taehyung is bursting from it.

“I fucking love it, baby girl.” Smack. You can practically hear him grinning in satisfaction. His palm massages the redness he inflicted like smearing paint, touch growing closer and closer to your core.

Then with one push at your inner thighs, he spreads your legs wide open.

“Fucking hell. Crotchless? You’re really spoiling me tonight.” Like a little boy on Christmas Day, he marvels at your glistening slit, gaping at him in anticipation. Another small surprise for him.

“Of course- ahh!” You break into a moan when he runs two fingers down your folds, all the way to your bulging clit. “For the birthday boy.”

“Okay, now you definitely deserve the best head.” He lies on his front and grips onto your thighs to pull himself up to face level with your cunt.

You won’t tell him to prevent further ego inflation but every head he gives is the best head.

“Wait, Taehyung, it’s your birthday. Just let me-” You squirm in his clutch, trying to flip around, but he holds you still.

“Exactly. My birthday. I get to eat you out if I want to. It’s what my baby girl deserves.” For some reason, you blush. Who are you to resist head, especially from Taehyung?

Heat of his breath tickling your entrance, you plant your face onto the pillow and clamp down on your lip, preparing for that mind-twisting sensation that has a way of robbing you of sanity. His mouth finds your thighs first, kissing, sucking, blooming roses of his affection. You let him mark you - you are completely his tonight. Then his breath arrives at the sensitive crevice where your folds begin, a slow seduction towards your tingling bud. When he finally latches onto your clit, your eyes roll to the back of your empty head, a whimper ensuing.

His tongue is a predatory serpent, ceaselessly rolling your bud in his mouth. He’s rough, generous with the waves of pleasure he sends. You wish you aren’t lying on your front right now, just so you can look down at his concentrated face and pull on his wavy mop of hair.

With every flick of his tongue, you swim closer to your orgasm. His fingers are digging to your thighs, his breath quickening with his face buried in you. When he adds his long slender digits, you know your demise is round the corner.

“Fuck, daddy.” You yell into the pillow, that name coming so naturally to you that it requires zero brain processing to leave you.

Taehyung hums in response, those baritone vibrations shaking into your core until your leg involuntarily kicks back. Gripping onto the sheets, a string of profanities expel from you as that euphoric current comes crashing onto you, drowning your surroundings so that all you feel is his face, his tongue, his teeth, still mercilessly going despite your state.

“Fuck!” A tear slips from the violent stimulation at your clit continuing past your orgasm. You guess it’s payback.

Not one minute later, a second climax hits you, this time stronger than the last as it rides on the residual pleasure. The orgasm disperses into tension down your thighs, dying for more friction to relieve your cunt of the blissful ache. Warm tears stain the pillowcase your face is buried in, your cries muffled.

His pace gradually decelerates into soft kisses on your flower, fingers withdrawing to massage your folds. You are motionless, completely depleted after the dopaminergic release. Delicately, his lips travel up to your ass, where he sucks more colours as he awaits your recovery.

“How was that, baby girl?” Taehyung slowly turns you over onto your back, a lazy grin on his glistening mouth, your wetness slathered all over his nose. It views in your eyes as a display of your possession. You don’t miss the triumph in his gaze; you wonder if he likes making you cum more than cumming himself.

“Your mouth is fucking incredible.” You bask in the post-orgasm high, pulling him atop you, hand locking in his curls. You taste yourself as you kiss him, slowly and lethargically, your energy ebbing back to you.

“Yeah?” He smiles against your lips. “You know what’s incredible? You in this fucking uniform.” Pulling away, he scans your body top to bottom. And as you follow his gaze, you notice his hardened cock, once again ready for another round. You surprise yourself with how ready you are to take him, exhaustion not yet settled in from his overstimulation.

“You like it that much?” You press your lips together, and as used to Taehyung’s constant flattery as you should be, you still feel proud.

Taehyung nestles his face onto your neck. “If we went to high school together, I would 100% have been your bitch. Not a single doubt. Whipped.”

Your heart squeezes. Whipped.

You kiss his hair, resisting the urge to make a comment about what he said. “Haha. I would not have noticed you, I was obsessed with the captain of the football team.”

Taehyung lifts his head up, frowning at you with a playful annoyance. “Are you sure you want to mention another man in front of me right now?” For emphasis of his possessive mood, he grinds his member into your thigh. You can’t help but push back to feel him digging into you. Possessive Taehyung toys with your strings.

“Yeah, what are you going to do about it?” You taunt further, pulling on his locks. Taehyung’s competitiveness is an easy target for manipulation; everytime he starts to go soft and sappy on you, all you have to do is tug on his jealousy and the bull will come charging back full force.

Surely enough, he growls into your ear. “Don’t forget who you’re speaking to, miss. You wouldn’t want your parents knowing the naughty things you’ve been up to, would you?” So he does love the roleplay. His tone slightly sarcastic, but also not really. But before you can hiss a witty response, he silences you with his teeth on your neck. As he sucks on your tender skin, your nails rake across his back in pleasure. He’s growing bolder with his territory.

“More hickeys?” You purr, not exactly in the complaining tone you’d wished it would come out in.

“Yeah, what are you going to do about it?” He mocks, leaving a wet purple trail across your throat.

You allow it for the sole reason that it’s his birthday. Otherwise, you’d be kicking off.

You’ve never liked the idea of hickeys, the notion that someone feels entitled to mark your skin as theirs. You don’t belong to anyone. This is your own skin, and no one else’s. Yet - right now, as Taehyung nips at your neck, hand yanking on your uniform’s tie to pull you closer to him, you feel like you do belong…

You don’t finish that thought.

Reaching down, you begin stroking his patiently awaiting cock. “You’re brave for someone who’s dick is in my hands.”

Taehyung breaks away from your neck and reviews his work of art. The wolfish grin an indication of his pride. “You’re going to kill me tomorrow.” He says without the fear that should come with such statement.

Yes, you’re definitely going to.

“Then fuck me until I forgive you.” You challenge, unbuttoning the first button of your shirt while your stroking quickens.

He doesn’t need to be told twice. Fingers scrambling to undo the rest of your shirt, his mouth finds yours again, sucking on your bottom lip until it’s sure to swell later. Your bra falls loose with a dexterous flick, a gesture he can do in his sleep. Yet, he makes no move to remove your checkered tie at all.

When you try to loosen it yourself, he grabs your hand and pins it against the pillow. “That stays on tonight, along with the skirt and the stockings.” Voice laced with carnality, there’s a feral glint in his glare.

“Yes, sir.” Smile unstifled, you fall back into obedience.

Taehyung dares to plant more bitemarks down your chest before taking your nipple in his mouth, tormenting the sensitive bud relentlessly. Patience wearing thin, you line his tip with your slit, dallying it around to coat it with your dampness.

“Wait, grab a condom.” He mutters.

“Don’t need one.”

He looks up, confused. “What? Why?”

“I started taking the pill. Surprise.”

The look of pure shock and delight that usurps his face, for the third? fourth? time tonight, sows a seed of joy in your core.

“Wait, seriously?” You swear you feel his cock twitch happily in your hand. That stupid boxy grin that makes him look like a kid again… You want to kiss him dizzy.

“Yes, seriously.” You would never admit that you started taking contraception solely for Taehyung, because that would be weird, you absolutely did not do it for Taehyung. You’d always wanted to start contraception anyway. This was your own decision, influenced by no one else.

Certainly. No one else. Of course.

“Holy fucking shit. Y/N, you’re amazing.” Taehyung cannot contain his glee despite its juxtaposition with his pulsating cock about to enter you any moment now. “All this for me?” He asks, still in disbelief, as if the answer isn’t already written in big bold black letters.

“For the birthday boy, and the birthday boy only.” Your nose grazes his. These are the very words you’d be embarrassed to be caught saying to any guy, yet you’re currently too fuelled by the desire to please him to berate yourself.

Without another second gone to waste, Taehyung pushes his girthy member into your heat. Though it glides in with ease, your walls are stretched so wide that your inside stir, a sore pressure squeezing around him with each thrust. You always seem to forget how well he fits into you, and so each time comes as an eye-rolling surprise - the way he fills you so completely and entirely with his hefty cock.

“Oh fuck, you feel so-” He doesn’t manage to finish his sentence, too caught up in the raw unobstructed sensation of your slick walls.

Lifting your leg over his shoulder, the cavernous angle allows him to jolt deeper into you, his tip violently punching through you. While one hand remains on your ankle, the other twists your tie around his wrist and pulls as if it were a leash. “Sir…” You choke out at the constriction around your throat.

“Are you going to bad girl again?” He grunts, sweat beading on his forehead while he continues to ram his hips.

“No, sir. I won’t touch myself again,” you moan under him, “unless you are watching.”

“Fuck, Y/N.” One eye shut, Taehyung sticks his thumb into your mouth to suckle on. Your tongue swirls around his finger, biting down every time you need to shriek in pleasure.

After a while, he flips your bodies over so that you are riding him, watching, mesmerised, as your breasts bounce freely each time you spring on his dick. Your body falls back at the rippling coil inside you, hands braced on the mattress to keep you upright.

Taehyung could watch you ride him for the rest of his life. Hell, if he has a heart attack and dies this very moment, he would die the happiest man.

Sometimes, while you’re fucking, Taehyung gets a sudden rush of jealousy. Jealous that he wasn’t the one to ruin your innocence. Jealous that someone else other than him got to, or still gets to, fuck you like this.

He pulls on your tie so that you fall over him, lips colliding to remind himself that he’s the one fucking you right now, the rest shouldn’t matter. The way you moan into him reassures that no one has ever, or can ever, fuck you the way he does.

Then a messy whimper leaves you like a symphony, and for the third time tonight, you come undone, unravelled.

“Fu-u-u-uckkk.” You cry, arms looping around Taehyung’s neck, holding on as if he’s your lifeline because you yourself are unsure how much of this you can take before you drown.

“Baby, you’re so good, cumming for me again.” He sings, knowing that words like these thrums something in your core. You lap up his praise, smiling against his teeth despite yourself. It’s honestly a miracle how your usual brusque controlling self is suddenly transformed into his docile little girl, especially after a round of orgasms. “I’m going to cum again too.”

“Daddy, fuck, please. Cum inside me.” You pant, hips bouncing as fast as your aching muscles allow. Truth be told, no one has ever finished inside you before. And you are dying to find out how it feels.

Taehyung seems to know this. He grabs onto your waist, holding you in place, and plunges unforgivingly into you, penetrating your walls so ardently that you are shoved near the brink of yet another orgasm.

A grumble rippling through the room, finally, you feel a hot jet shoot into you, squirt after squirt of his thick cum filling you up. He frowns, a hoarse cry from the immense pleasure arriving at his cock, taking over him. Fucking hell, this is hot.

And kind of really intimate.

However, you notice that his pace has yet to slacken.

“I’m not done with you yet.” His eyes open to reveal pupils glowing with vehemence. Your clit throbs.

Still inside you, he turns you over so that you are both on your sides spooning, one of your legs hoisted up by his rough grip. The slap of your skin rings crisp and clear as he continues to fuck you. You lean back into him, ignoring the sticky coat of sweat coalescing your skins. His cum lubricates each thrust as you feel some spill out of you. His fingers start to stimulate your clit to help you reach your ultimate climax, viciously rubbing your sensitive swollen bud so much that you begin to see stars.

For him to keep fucking you even after cumming despite his tremendous sensitivity… Taehyung is going wild tonight.

“Are you going to cum one last time for me, baby girl?” He pants heavily in your ear.

“Yes, daddy.” Your own cunt is leaking profusely its tears of joy; you don’t think you’ve ever been this wet before.

In a few more thrusts, Taehyung is cumming inside you again, this time naturally less than the last, yet from his loud coarse groan, you deduce is much more intense. He pounds slowly yet robustly, milking every last drop into you. Due to the sheer oversensitivity, he has no choice but to pull out of you immediately after, leaving a spurt of his cum surging out of you.

“Oh my god.” He moans into your neck, both your heads spinning from the vigour of your intercourse.

But he knows you’re still a minute away from your orgasm. And never one to disappoint, he quickly sits up and spreads your legs open.

“Holy fuck.” Taehyung freezes at the sight of his cum slowly trickling out of you. To him, it’s a sign of possession, ownership. Apart from his ex, he has never fucked without protection, certainly not those random one night stands. To him, it’s a sign of intimacy.

Catching his white liquid in two fingers, he inserts it into your already gaping mouth, smearing it all over your tongue. In your cute little braids, you swallow it willingly, and Taehyung swears that he could fuck you again right then and there.

“You like that?” He asks, sticky fingers entering your core, feeling how clenched you are due to the pent up pressure.

“Mhmm.” You nod, hips lifting off the bed so that he can reach deeper. His thumb massages your clit, long digits moving in a come hither motion, stretching your walls in cusps that his cock did not have the ductility to reach. “Ahh, shit.”

Determination worn on his face despite his tiring limbs, Taehyung fucks you with his finger as you thrash beneath him. Your clit is already exploding with sensitivity from the previous rounds, and on top of that, with his thick knuckles push into you again and again, you are clawing at him while your whole body convulses.

The coil within your finally snaps. The ecstatic sensation exploding within you, flooding your every fibre until tears spring out your eyes. A clear liquid shoots out of you to both your surprises, and sprays its droplets towards Taehyung. His eyes widen, marvelling at your beauty as you cum not only on his fingers but all over him.

“Jesus Christ!” Chuffed with himself evidently, he leans in to kiss you, deep and desperate, while his fingers slow their steady thrusts to let you ride out the remainder of your high. His mouth is warm, a familiar taste as you regain your sense of self and surrounding that you tend to lose during sex.

As your brain begins to function again, the first thought you register is how much you don’t want to stop kissing Taehyung, how much you don’t want to let go of him.

“Taehyung…” You whine, bottom lip in the possession of his teeth.

“Feeling good?” He lets go of his bite, but lips remain dearly magnetised to yours. Dragging out his fingers, the wet noises of your clenched walls ring. Taehyung sucks on his dripping digits as you push his sweat-dampened fringe out of his face to survey his eyes. Full of yearning. And the way he is sucking… appears almost as a last display of submission after completely ruining you. A last shred of I’m yours.

“So.” You peck him. “Fucking.” Another. “Good.” Peck. Your bodies naked, your skirt creased and skin claggy, you refuse to release each other from your embrace. “But Taehyung…”

“What it is, my baby?” From on top of you, he is looking down at you as if you’re some delicate little buttercup in a barren field, a ray of joy radiating from his smile.

You tense. My baby.

You two might be kind of screwed...

But you’ll think about that another time. Right now, you just want to be held and kissed and looked after.

“It’s not fair. This was meant for you, but you made it about me.” You don’t know what’s taken over you but you pout at him, the same way he would do to you when he wanted something. But why, of course, it’s just like Taehyung to make you come four times despite it being his birthday sex. You don’t even know what to expect for your own birthday.

His own hair dishevelled, he tucks your loose braids behind your ears, a gesture of affection. “Nothing gets me off more than making you feel good. This was about me. This was everything I wanted. Best sex I’ve ever had. But in what world would my best sex not include making you squirt?”

Your don’t know why but you feel incredibly vulnerable right now, your hard edges softening. It’s the after-sex glow that you’re seeing everything in. You feel warm, bubbly, tender.

And now your chest feels weird, like something itching to rupture out of your ribcage. You want it to stop, yet also don’t.

“Taehyung…” You whine his name again. “No fair… You can’t be like this.” Your brain offers no explanation as to why you’ve adopted his usual saccharine manner, other than the fact that he has fucked you completely senseless.

“Like what?” He asks, egging the rare words of sweetness out of you.

“Like… You know… So giving and nice and perf…” Your voice trails off when you notice his excited smirk. God, what the fuck are you saying? You flush in embarrassment.

“Perf…? His smug grin only grows at your shyness.

“Stop. You know what I mean.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Stop teasing me.” Taehyung chuckles at your frustration, taking the chance to kiss the tip of your nose before you try to squirm out of his arms like a cat.

“No, go on. You need to be better with your words. Tell me how you feel.”

Your entire face is heated.

“I… You’re just… You treat me so well. How am I supposed to sleep with anyone else anymore?” You immediately wish you didn’t say it out loud. Because your phrasing implies that you want monogamy, commitment. It’s not what you meant at all, you don’t think. You just meant… You don’t know what you just meant.

You search his eyes frantically, in fear that he’s thinking the same, only to find them calm, content. “I mean, I guess I’m pretty fucking awesome. Thanks.”

Rolling your eyes, you’re grateful for his childish humour obstructing any serious consideration of your words.

“Don’t make me take it back, moron.” You scoff, pinching his round cheek between your knuckles.

“Too bad, it’s my birthday, everything I say is the law.” Still hovering over you, he presses gentle kisses all over your face, delighting in the way you pretend to hate it even though you can’t suppress the smile. When he stops, his face is sincere, the playfulness gone. “Y/N.”

“What?”

“Thank you so much, honestly, from the bottom of my heart. This was… the best birthday I’ve ever had. Not just the sex, but the whole time with you, the dinner, the party, everything.” Your heartbeat quickens, unable to hold his gaze so you focus on the curve of his collarbone instead. “Even better than the pirate-themed birthday party my parents threw me when I turned eight.”

You laugh, shaking your head. “Honoured. It was my pleasure.”

“Seriously, I lov-”

Taehyung catches himself before he could finish that sentence. Those unspoken words hang over your heads like a puppet.

Because for some reason, although you’ve said ‘I love you’ to each other a plethora of times in the past, this time feels like a different connotation is implicated. The line between platonic love and romantic love feels blurred. And neither of you know which love is meant.

Taehyung is a sentimental guy, you tell yourself. Of course he means he loves you as his best friend. And that’s surely what you mean too when your eyes are pleading him to keep kissing you.

There’s a moment of silence, for you both to gather your scattered thoughts, staring at each other, unsure what to say.

You clear your throat, dispelling the tension in the air.

“Lets go clean up.”

“Yeah.” Taehyung rolls off you, avoiding your eye as much as you are avoiding his.

The clean up is wordless, both pretending to be too preoccupied to spare the unspoken words any thought.

Except they’re all that’s playing at your mind.

Taehyung didn’t mean it like that. Taehyung doesn’t love you like that. You’re just overthinking. And he’s overthinking about you overthinking. You two are fine, you’re normal.

Examining the purple clouds he had imprinted on you, a stream down your neck, a cluster around your breasts, then the large ones between your thighs, you’re surprised to find not one drip of annoyance. A scary thought dawns on you. What if you like them? What if you like being marked by Taehyung?

What the fuck is happening?

You wait for him to crack a joke to ease up the awkwardness, glancing up at him in the mirror as you dry your hands on the towel by the sink. He doesn’t. Instead, he’s perched on the edge of the bath tube. Zoned out.

Have you finally taken it too far? Finally overstepped that hazy nebulous line that you perhaps should have set more clear?

“Hey, Taehyung.” His head snaps up at you, eyes large with uncertainty. “You okay?”

You want to reach out to touch him, brush his cheek, kiss his forehead. But you hold back. Not wanting to fuel the fire of confusion. But then he tugs you towards him by the hem of your skirt, corner of his lips turning up, imbuing you with a gust of relief.

“Just thinking.” His fingers crawl up your legs, holding onto your hips like his hands belong to nowhere else. “Come here.”

Chest pounding, you walk towards him, let him sit you down on his lap. Though you wish not to look at him with his face so close to yours, your eyes cannot pull away from his striking beauty. They say the eyes are the windows to the soul, but Taehyung’s feel more like the front door to your home. When you look into them, no matter how you’re feeling, whether you’d been fighting or kissing, you just feel embraced in a cloud of clarity, security.

You don’t want to think about the complication between you two at the moment. You just want to be looking at him, touching him, holding him.

You watch him glance at your lips, hesitancy playing at his mind. You know he’s thinking the same.

“We’re okay, right?” Throat tight, you ask, rather pointlessly.

“Of course. We’re great, same old us.” His arm around your waist feels warm and safe, and when your mirror his growing smile, you almost believe him.

But when your lips gently press against his, you know it’s a lie.

You’re not the same old you.

Taehyung feels different. Skin smoother, tastes sweeter, mouth softer. The roughness of his usual kisses is gone, replaced by an inexplicable tenderness that makes you feel things in your gut. You swat those feelings away.

Something is changing. And as much as you don’t want to acknowledge it, you don’t think you can ignore its booming presence.

You don’t dare make a sound as he carries you back to his room. You don’t protest when he throws one of his t-shirts over your head. Nor when he holds you into his chest, lips tracing your forehead with a soft sleepy smile.

Noting that you’re being uncharacteristically quiet, he pokes the nub of your nose. “Who stole your tongue?”

Act normal. Just be your loud annoying self.

“Uh… You.” You murmur, unable to meet his eye even with strenuous effort

Well, fuck.

“Okay, let me give it back to you.” Before you can protest, he is kissing you again. And you want to push him away because you feel your heart lurching to your throat, and you don’t think it is healthy. But your feeble hand that was meant to shove him off lands weakly on his pec, and somehow with a mind of its own, snakes up to his neck and pulls him in. His tongue unfurls onto yours, gently sweeping away any logic.

When his lips finally leave yours, you’re out of breath.

You don’t know what’s happened to you. Since when did you react like this to Taehyung?

Forcing your usual smirk, you try to wear a convincing facade that you feel nothing out of the ordinary. “I’m expecting great things for my birthday, though to be honest this is going to be hard to beat.” The underlying dishonesty tastes sour. You’ve never had to put on a front with Taehyung, and doing so now feels… alien.

“I’ll start planning it tomorrow, don’t you worry, your highness.” Taehyung pretends to roll his eyes at your demand, though the circles he’s rubbing down your back is telling of his genuinity. He isn’t an classically romantic guy, not one for flowers and chocolate, but more a sentimental gift that leaves a deep meaning. You know you’ll love whatever he plans. It worries you that you’ll perhaps love it too much. “But seriously, thank you for everything. The easel? How much did that cost you? I’ve looked at that brand before and there’s no way it was cheap.”

“It doesn’t matter how much it costed.” Warmth is creeping up on your cheeks again. You try to excuse it as Taehyung’s radiant body heat. “Let’s just say I had to resort to prostitution to pay for it, okay?”

Bodies shuddering in laughter, some tension in the air is thankfully alleviated by your humour, filling you with hope that things should and will return to normal in no time. You just need to stop overthinking.

“Hey, can you sleep here tonight?”

You freeze at his request. Because despite your constant fucking around with each other, one clear boundary has been that you don’t physically sleep with each other after sex. If you do sleep over, it is always just a completely platonic gesture. No kissing or fondling. Something about falling asleep in each other’s naked bodies is too mushy and couple-like. The type of thing that make you puke.

“Why?” You frown defiantly at him. “It’s not even your birthday anymore, it’s past midnight. So technically, I don’t have to treat you like royalty anymore.”

“Why not?” Taehyung rebuts, that cocky expression making you want to nipple-cripple him. This difficult son of a bitch, does he not know that the line is going hazy between you two?

“It’s weird, we just had sex.”

“So? What do you have against sleeping together after sex? Scared that you’ll fall in love with me?”

Your chest sinks to your stomach. You swear to god, Kim Taehyung is going to be the fucking death of you, stupid shit. How could he even say something like that so casually?

“In your fucking dreams, prick. If anything, you’d be the one to fall in love with me first, I just made you cum three times.” Taehyung chuckles at the flash of fury in your eyes, amused by how easy it is to strike a nerve in you.

“Do you want me to fall in love with you?” Though his tone is playful, and the wiggle of his brows suggests his mockery, you don’t know if he is completely joking anymore. And suddenly, everywhere that you’re touching - your entangled legs, his hands on the small of your back, your chests pressed on each other - everywhere starts to burn.

“Shut up, I’ll fucking sleep here, okay?”

And so this night, for the first time in the seven months you’ve been on-and-off fornicating alongside your unwavering friendship, you rest in Taehyung’s bed, your frame tucked snugly in his, his arm reposed on your waist. And despite your fatigue, it takes too long for sleep to find you as you watch his shoulders rise and fall in the dark, lips slightly parted, beckoning you to kiss them.

.

26/12/19

© Copyright 2019

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@taexxxiiaa @shookpreme @taetaeobsessed @tangledsparkles @nonexistentfucks @evilkookie @nbiased95 @taehyungmakesmeoof @itscalledgayhoney @tahaing @deliciouslydisturbed365 @expensive-bangtan-girl @jwlmnbt @herakimkim @dnyad @kaepjjang365 @expensive-bangtan-girl@gingerpeachtae @spring2787 @askingtheimportantthingshere @casualminiaturetimemachine @xblackclover13x @vasysauce @deadinsidebitch2412 @emiyooa @i-dont-even-know-fck @chimycthulhu @gixanjos @hisunshiine @xtaeyi @softjellyjimin @bluemooncnblue @malfeitofeitto @bangtanfancamp @keopitae @out-of-jams

#heatwave #heatwave drabble #taehyung #bts taehyung #kim taehyung #taehyung smut #taehyung fluff #taehyung angst #taehyung fanfic #taehyung drabble #taehyung oneshot #taehyung reactions #taehyung imagines #taehyung scenarios #taehyung x reader #taehyung fic #bts smut #bts fluff #bts taehyung smut #bts angst #bts fanfic #bts oneshot #bts drabbles #bts reactions #bts imagines #namjoon #namjoon smut #seokjin #jin #seokjin smut

[starlight-starwrites]

agent whiskey

character headcanons

note: did a rewatch of kingsman golden circle, so...how could i resist? i really started out with ‘this is fun!’ and then things got real. again, i like to think most of what is here is inspired straight from what we see in the movie, and some go a little beyond bc if we’re honest, those writers did our jack dirty.

- Has a known streak for being an asshole, but he doesn’t usually even realize it.

- He thinks he’s funny (he is, but only sometimes).

- The man loves the high life. Country livin’ is fine by him, but high country living. He was sent to work in New York for a reason.

- He is great at mixing his attitude and his manners. He’s usually always polite, but his impatience will get the better of him. He’ll be the one at the store giving lip to the manager, yet still saying please and thank you the whole time.

- Loves playing the seniority card. He’s good at what he does, no doubt there, but he still thinks he’s tough shit He gives himself more importance than he should. If someone he likes tells him off, he will drop down so many pegs, it is incredible. Will go quiet and embarrassed if scolded.

- Actually has pretty good taste in fashion. He pays attention. It’s a bit of a preening thing, a bit of a wanting to seem valid thing.

- He will giggle at a sex joke if he wasn’t expecting it (if he’s flirting, it’s a different story).

- He is great at hiding his nerves. Will overcompensate with the cockiness sometimes if he feels out of place, and definitely likes his liquid courage when talking to women.

- He feels like he has to have a pick up line. He has to impress. His track record of relationships (or lack thereof) isn’t something he likes to think about. Whether it’s because he’s hung up on his late wife, or they don’t like him beyond a quick lay, or he finds he can’t connect with them, he isn’t always sure. He’ll do it for work, or if he really, really wants to, but beyond that, he finds himself distracted by other things.

- Whiskey is his go-to drink. What came first—his preference or the code name? No one is sure, but he is definitely dedicated it. He may hate drugs, but he’s quick to drown his sorrows in alcohol.

- He can cook. Maybe he's not a gourmet chef, but everything turns out fairly decent, and he's even got a couple of special recipes that turn out incredible. His homemade chili is immaculate.

- He doesn’t have any close friends. When he was younger he had some, he knows what it’s like to have a friend. But when he goes out, sees just a group of guys who mess around, genuinely like each other, he feels like he’s missing something. It almost makes him uncomfortable at the thought of having such a support group.

- Despite his propensity to come off as a bit of an asshole, he pales in comparison to actual assholes. Does not tolerate them. If someone is harassing or being a general nuisance, he wont hesitate to step in if necessary.

- If it’s not necessary, he is shameless and will absolutely stay for the show. He finds the drama amusing, and if it comes to action, all the better.

- The man knows what he’s doing (most of the time). He’s a good agent. A good fighter. When things sometimes go south, something unexpected happens, part of him lives for the thrill of it, hoping for a time to shine. It keeps him on his feet. He’d rather focus on not dying during those times, then focus on trying to live when things are quiet.

- He likes working with other agents, it makes him feel less alone. But he is a stickler about who he works with. He’d, of course, prefer to be in charge, and he doesn’t like incompetence. Shit happens, but if you’re not good at back-up, Whiskey’s got no use for you.

- He trains and practices a lot. A lot, a lot. You can’t get that good with a whip, a lasso, and guns, without honing his skills. He likes to try out new moves too, but he won’t do it in front of people. He’s broken quite a few things in his own home practicing moves, but in the end, it really pays off.

- He’s fiercely protective of the people he cares about. If he loved someone, he would likely save the one at the cost of the world.

- Holds grudges like no other. Will seek revenge whenever the mood strikes him. And he has a knack for it too. Not always confrontational, but if you wrong him, and he feels its personal? He’ll make sure you’re ruined one way or another.

- He doesn’t always want to take the lead, but if there’s ever a pause, someone hesitates to do something, he automatically thinks ‘fine, I’ll do it myself’.

- He lives to be a showoff. He likes to be the center of attention. Its stems from his feeling of not being good enough, of not being able to do things right in the past. He doesn’t care what sort of attention he gathers, and if someone negatively reacts to his skills (with jealousy, criticism, any of the sort) he still counts it as a win. Afterall, why would someone be paying so much attention to him if he isn’t worth it?

- He’s a risk taker. Has been all his life. Some risks didn’t pay out and left him with insecurities he likes to pretend don’t exist. Some do pay off, and it’s the best high he feels.

- He’s gambled before and would again if the opportunity were to present itself. He’s tried to stop, but he knows he’ll go back. When he was young, he liked the idea of a high roller’s table. With his job and how much he makes, he’s closer to getting to that fantasy. He doesn’t talk about it, but his dream mission is at a casino, playing on the Statesman bill, with a finely dressed woman on his arm.

- Yes. His biggest fantasy is to be an American cowboy James Bond. Sorry. No I’m not.

- When he was young, he was seriously in love. It was that first love, the one you think you could never have again, yet somehow is still only a surface love. It felt deep at the time, but if he were to love again, really love, it would be a true love that he doesn’t even believe exists. It’s the knowing someone as much as you know yourself, the sort of support that is unbelievable yet impossible to live without, and being able to share the fears and doubts of past trauma and uncertain futures and be met with trust and loyalty that could only be found in fiction.

- He’s become a serial flirt to hide that desire for true love. He loved his late wife, but they hadn’t had the time, and they’d still been practically kids. He’s afraid to let any relationship go beyond that.

-He is a man of devotion. Devoted to his work, to his principles, to his wife. Sometimes the way he expresses it is extreme, but no one can deny he cares.

- He likes to have nice things. He’s got a nice apartment, filled with any comforts and random assortments that spark joy. If Marie Kondo went through his stuff, there would be very little he’d agree to let go. Everything seems to have a story behind it.

- “Now that hat? Been with me through too much. Couldn’t wear it til I was eighteen, tried to ride my first horse with that one, and I damn near lost it. See these bullet holes? Mission up North went South, and had I moved any slower, I’d’ve been brought back in a pretty wooden box and dropped six feet under.”

- He may try to support the Statesman brand but…his name is Jack Daniels. You can bet he’s got every brand of whiskey in his own personal collection.

- At his place in new York, he always keeps extra stuff ‘for company’. He very rarely ever gets a chance to use it.

- He loves gadgets, tech, the best vehicles. He tries to make sure he can do it all because it makes him feel like Bond, but he sticks to what he knows best. The whip and the lasso make him unique.

- The man is really kinky. He doesn’t let it out unless he is completely comfortable, but…he really is.

- This man is a mama’s boy. We all know it.

- He wants to have a family. He really does. Part of him refuses to believe he ever will, that he doesn’t deserve it. The other part thinks that it’s the only thing that will fill the hole in his heart.

#agent whiskey #jack daniels #agent whiskey headcanons #jack daniels headcanons #agent whiskey x reader #jack daniels x reader #kingsman the golden circle

[inmyarmswrappedin]

How does SKAM build a LI?

I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and even gave speeches to my long suffering friends about the topic. Now that we know what happened to Josh to make him the way he is, I feel like I can finally post about the way SKAM built love interest characters. 

When it’s good, SKAM is a very tightly written show because every clip, and every storyline, advances the themes that make the main character vulnerable. I would call this their “shame” but DRUCK fans don’t like that term because the show is called “pressure” and not “shame”. In the end, whether a character’s issues are internal (”shame”) or external (”pressure”) is irrelevant to what I want to talk about, so let’s just call those themes a character’s vulnerability, shall we? 

How does SKAM make every storyline relate to the themes of the season and what makes a character vulnerable? Well, one way it does that is to make the love interest the personification of a character’s fears and issues.

To wit: In season 1, Eva is called out on having no opinions of their own. If you read @skamenglishsubs‘ culture and context posts, they have listed every instance in which this theme is portrayed by having Eva follow someone else’s opinion (I recommend you do this, because there are way more instances than I picked up on!). So, who is Jonas? Jonas is an extremely opinionated person who feels he’s not a follower at all. 

In season 2, Noora is afraid of opening herself to a boyfriend, both emotionally and sexually, because when she was 13 she had sex with a guy she thought she was in love with, who then dumped her as that was all he was interested in. Who is William? William is the school’s fuckboy who dumps girls after having sex with them, and doesn’t seem to care about the girls’ feelings, but rather is just interested in them advertising his sexual prowess via hoodies. 

In season 3, Isak’s strained relationship with his mom makes him believe that it’s impossible to have a functional relationship with a person who has a mental illness, because they’re not in touch with reality. Even has bipolar disorder.

And then, in possibly one of the most simplistic ways to perceive one’s own character, in season 4, Sana is a hijabi out to prove she can do everything a ~normal Norwegian party girl~ can do. Yousef is... not a Muslim, lol. (Note that the Yousef storyline was not originally planned by Julie Andem, and in fact came about because of feedback she received from Muslim fans that they wanted Sana to have a LI. Sana’s main storyline isn’t so much about her religion, but rather her furious desire to prove the haters wrong.)

In general, most of the SKAM remakes have not tried to reinvent the wheel, and have more or less stuck to these character profiles in order to build their own seasons. Most of the changes remake stans will point to when they talk about a remake season don’t really qualify as changes (under this definition) because they don’t change the conflict between the main and the LI. 

I was pretty interested in whether the remakes had picked up on this way to build a LI, and most particularly, how the remakes that have done original seasons built their LIs. Thoughts on these after the read more.

Out of all the seasons that remade SKAM’s four seasons, I would say there are only four that didn’t stick to the character profiles as outlined above. In my opinion, it’s these seasons:

Eva’s season in SKAM España changes this because Jorge is never set up as an opinionated person. He’s a good guy, for sure, a good friend to his friends like most Jonases, but you will never catch Jorge acting like his opinions are better than Eva’s. He never calls Eva out on not having opinions of her own. Their break up scene doesn’t deal with this, and most importantly, Eva could never get the upper hand in that last conversation like the other Evas have, because Jorge is the only Jonas to kiss Eva first.

Matteo’s season in DRUCK changes this because while Matteo is afraid that his mom won’t react well if he comes out to her, we have no idea what he thinks about having relationships with people with a mental illness, as a general rule. We don’t know because David doesn’t have a MI (that we know of). He is trans, and DRUCK wisely avoided making David’s gender identity the personification of Matteo’s issues (gvgvvh imagine how shit that would’ve been!!). Matteo and David’s major conflict is that Matteo has abandonment issues and David a tendency to peace out when things get hot.

Cris’ season in SKAM España changes this because Cris’ mom doesn’t have a mental illness. In fact, Cris doesn’t know much about MI in general. While Cris does have some internalized ableism, it comes from ignorance and buying into societal prejudices against MI, rather than personal experience. Cris’ vulnerability isn’t her ideas about MI. Her issue is that she has bought into the idea that she’s an unintelligent party girl who can’t ever be responsible or dependable.

Nora’s season in SKAM España both keeps and changes the conflicts as presented in SKAM. Nora fails to trust Alejandro because he’s a fuckboy who would have sex with girls and then mock them for getting their hopes up. But, unlike Noora, Nora’s issue is that her lack of trust in Alejandro throws her into the arms of the seemingly ideal boyfriend despite the red flags, whereas Noora’s lack of trust in William made her withhold sex. 

As you can see, all Sana seasons so far (Amira N.’s included) have kept the original conflict by having a non Muslim Yousef. Under this definition, Martino’s season in SKAM Italia isn’t a subversion, because while he does live with his mom, he doesn’t think he can have a functional relationship with her. Aside from Eva Vázquez, all of the Evas kissed their Jonas first. However, I should note that while SKAM Austin kept the Eva/Jonas conflict, they’re the only other SKAM that doesn’t open with Jonas’ essay. (Which I chalk up to facebook not wanting their show to open with a blatantly anti-capitalist speech lmao.) 

Now, how did the remakes with original seasons build their LIs?

Arthur’s season in SKAM France is an interesting example, because Baguettes picked up on the LI personifying the main’s vulnerability. If Arthur is vulnerable about his (lack of) hearing, Noée embraces it, takes pride on it and bases her identify around it. So far, this is exactly how SKAM/Julie Andem built her LIs. However, Arthur rejects Noée and mocks her language. Noée disappears after s5. Alexia has no hearing issues, or any disability.

Lola’s season in SKAM France similarly picks up on the concept. Since Lola is an addict, Maya’s father was one as well. However, this conflict isn’t really explored amidst the thousand other ideas that were thrown at the wall during this season. It’s fair to say Lola and Maya’s clips don’t develop the theme of addiction throughout the season. Unless you want to count Maya telling Lola that Lola is Maya’s addiction, I suppose. 

Kato’s season in wtFOCK (oh yes I’m going there) could be said to have picked up on the concept, although not in any real elegant way. Because of fan feedback for Moyo to get a season (which they declined to do for super valid reasons I’m sure), the team decided to have Moyo be the LI and worked backwards to build the main. It is similar to how SKAM approached Sana’s LI.  Moyo is a black guy, so Kato would be a racist! Genius!

Given these precedents, I was really curious what Nora’s season in DRUCK would do with their first 100% original love interest (so, not counting David). If they decided to go with SKAM’s standard way of building a LI, there were several possibilities. Nora’s mom has addiction issues, and this is a vulnerability of Nora’s. Would that mean that Josh would have substance issues? Or maybe his dad? His mom? Nora has a mental illness. Would that mean Josh would have issues around mental illness or therapy? Would he maybe have a mental illness himself? Nora was set up from the start as a liar. Would Josh be honest to a fault? And so on. 

In the end, it seems like DRUCK has taken the same approach they did with David. That is, Nora doesn’t have to accept something about Josh that she has preconceived ideas about (Noora, Isak, Sana), neither are Josh and Nora extremes in one character trait (Eva and Jonas). With this clip, it appears that their conflict is that Nora has a problem sharing her vulnerabilities (reminder: she didn’t come clean in English class out of a desire to be vulnerable, but to prove a point) and Josh has abandonment issues that make him prefer to try to change a person or even be hurt, rather than be left behind. 

DRUCK’s approach to building a LI in s5 (and probably beyond) might end up making the season less cohesive than SKAM seasons were. On the other hand, you can argue that the way SKAM built LIs could end up being too predictable (Isak is afraid of MI so Even has a MI, Sana is a Muslim so Yousef isn’t, Noora is afraid of being used for sex so William uses girls for sex, etc) and perhaps lowkey reductionist. And that’s without getting into the issues of making a character’s mental illness, religion, gender identity, sexuality, ethnicity or race, etc... the source of another character’s vulnerability (or “shame” or “pressure” if you will). This is particularly clear in the hands of lesser writers, as seen on wtFOCK and SKAM France. 

I will also get yelled at by @dusuessekartoffel if I fail to acknowledge that DRUCK is now doing original seasons and, though based on SKAM, should therefore become its own thing, develop LIs how they will, without taking SKAM as a model for anything. Iiiiii... think that DRUCK still owes a lot to SKAM even in this generation, and I kind of feel like the way SKAM built LIs is like the real time aspect of SKAM, something that is embedded into the very concept of the show and not something you can just discard when you buy the adaptation rights, but this is certainly up for debate.  

#brain vomit #skam #skam france #skam españa #wtfock #druck

[johnbroutledge]

I really hated how they handled the popekie thing this season. He deserved a lot better.

under the cut because while I tried to stay as delicate and neutral as possible its...not exactly positive either, so if y'all wanna avoid that kinda thing, you can.

imma start this all off by saying: this is just my opinion, and I'm obviously not here trying to sway anyone. I fully stand by the idea you should ship and interact with whatever makes you happy, so if other people thought it was done well and are satisfied with how things are going, that's awesome! I love that for them. keep it up boo, but I've personally been thinking a lot about this, and here's kinda where I've landed with it.

to be honest nonnie, I wasn't about it either. the whole THING to me felt bad, not just the end. like, the buildup was weak, the actual relationship stage was always focused on the triangle rather than the couple, the whole sex thing felt like it happened for all the wrong reasons, and WHY did pope not have a chance to have FEELINGS about it? like do you really expect me to believe he's all good? sure he's saving face and sure he cares more about saving his friendship with her than anything else, but he's shown this entire time to never know where he stands with her, and then after he loses his freakin' virginity to her she peaces out. he's got feelings, and I'd like to see more of them. honestly I'd like to see more of the processing side from BOTH of them.

idk, everything about it just felt like....if you were going to do it that messily why do it at all? and I know, I know, it was this whole juxtoposition between p*pekie and j*ara but....nothing about it set well with me.

and don't get me wrong, how she feels is valid. she's allowed to not be into it, or whatever. no one is obligated to stick around in a situation that makes them feel shitty, no matter how much they know its gonna suck to walk away, but like. from a viewer standpoint, it felt bad. it felt incomplete. it felt....honestly pointless and half baked at the very best. and the thing is, they're most likely just going to have pope immediately have a thing with cleo just so that there's no excuse for him to have hard feelings toward either kie or jj over j*ara and that, to me, feels like lazy writing too. i mean, i'm not against him being with cleo, i love her, but are we really just gonna shove this entire thing under the rug and pretend it didnt happen so we can move on to the next ship?

it does bother me, quite a bit actually, these poor kids never seem to get to pROCESS anything, but yeah.

#nikki answers #anonymous #obx discussion #obx spoilers

[theaspers]

aaaaaaaa i love your writing so much!! you're so talented and your obey me content is *chefs kiss* i was wondering if you could write something abt asmo who comforts an mc who he notices has the same insecurities as him; i hope you keep writing for the om! fandom thank you so much!!!!

a/n: thank u anon i love u im sorry i took ur prompt and kinda ran w it (╥﹏╥) 

the realisation is quiet. nothing flashy, nothing loud but it jars asmo just the same. he’s not sure which unsettles him more - the fact that he had recognised it so quickly or the fact that you feel that way. the same way he did — or rather, still does.

he knows the feeling all too well, disgustingly and intimately so, but has never been able to put it into exact words. there’s the terrible loneliness and along with it, of course, is the fear of being left alone, abandoned. and then there is the ugly hatred, the feeling of not being enough, of never being enough. and then there is the intense need for validation, coming hand-in-hand with his disgusting desire to be noticed, to be wanted, to be loved.

and it’s this monstrosity that follows him around, that haunts him, that sticks to him like an unwanted second skin that he can’t get rid off no matter how much he scrubs himself red-raw. no matter how much he’d tried burying it all, had tried wiping blood-stained fingers clean, had pretended that the slaughter never happened - it is well and alive within him even now.

so he covers it up with bursts of flowery fragrance and new clothes and a well-placed smirk and a practiced wink. it’s easier to ignore than to deal with. easier to pretend that the wicked churning and the ugly darkness swirling inside him didn’t exist.

that you feel this way is alarming but he understands.

and usually, he would never let it happen. under normal circumstances, he would never show this hideous side of him to you. to be so vulnerable, so open and honest, is unruly. but this is you and you are important to him. and to know that you feel the way he does just doesn’t sit well with him.

“you and i aren’t so different,” he says as he runs a thumb across your cheek, slow and gentle. your eyes are locked with his, but he sees the heaviness of your eyelids, the slow but unavoidable siege of slumber over your consciousness.

you make a noise of dissent, cheek squished against one of his downy pillows but frown still prominent even under the dim lighting of his room.

he presses on, moving to trace the line of your jaw, “would you believe me if i said i cared about you?”

you hum, exhaustion lacing your voice, “i wouldn’t deserve it. don’t deserve you.”

“shouldn't it be the other way around?” he laughs but it comes out a bit forced. you say nothing, but the displeasure is clear on your face. it only serves to prove him right. somehow, self-doubt was a look only meant for one to wear and not the other. it's almost laughable.

“it’s not about that, anyway,” he musters up a smile, and hopes you believe him, “never about that. not with me.”

it is the honest truth. and sometimes, it feels as if he is made of so much of them that he can’t really tell apart the ones he believes from the ones he wants to believe but this one is a surety.

“you’re okay just like this,” he tells you as he gathers you up into his arms. you fit well into them, fit nicely. you would stay within them forever if he had a say in anything. he feels a rush of air, something like an amused huff, against the side of his neck.

there are a lot more words that he wants to say, a lot more unspoken, and he tries to convince himself that they aren’t words that he himself had wanted to hear but have long since stopped expecting them. things like there aren’t a lot of people i can say that about and i’ve never cared so much about someone and you’re the only one. but you speak up before he can say anything else.

“i care about you too, you know that, right?” you ask him, voice muffled.

it takes a while but he nods. just this once. just this once, he’ll let himself believe it.

#obey me #obey me swd #obey me x reader #obey me asmodeus #obey me imagines

[phynali]

more spn discussions, just skip this post y’all

 @queerbluebird​ thanks so much for engaging with my post/reply! i really enjoyed reading your response and i have a long reply here.

i’m responding to your post/reply here rather than reblogging it because honestly that thread is - so long. so very long. 

so first - 

i agree there is a difference between entitlement and what i would call, not promise, but instead “narrative follow-through”. A story that completely lacks narrative follow-through does end up feeling disappointing, or frustrating, or rage-inducing, depending on what’s happened. to me there’s a fundamental difference between critiquing a story based on follow-through and bad storytelling (which your post aims to do), versus say, creating hashtag campaigns about a character being silenced because and spreading conspiracy theories about a bad dub (among other things honestly).

and also - queerbaiting totally sucks, we definitely do agree on that.

where we disagree, i think are these two core points:

i do not see the narrative build-up that demands a follow-through. i do not see supernatural as having built up to the story that many destiel shippers seem to think was there, and no one has ever been able to point out to me any actual textual reasons that do craft that narrative build-up  

i fundamentally do not believe that destiel was ever a queerbait. queerbait involves active intent on the part of creators to tease a ship or queer representation in order to draw in $ from queer audiences without ever making it canon, so as not to alienate straight audiences. so, refering to point 1., i do not see the canon text as having laid the groundwork for a queerbait and those romantic tropes, at least not at any point in the past 7 years. and beyond the canon, the writers and producers and jensen ackles all indicated dean was straight, and that they were not writing a romance. if anyone queerbaited the fans, it was misha collins who kept teasing the possibility, and personally i would argue that was irresponsible of him. but that’s a different discussion altogether and tends to piss people off when it’s framed as such, because misha means a lot to them and it hurts to see the man who validated their feelings get criticized for the manner in which he validated them. so i’m gonna leave that aside.

beyond that, I want to engage with some of your specific quotes:

Supernatural loves to say “wait for it.” And I don’t think it’s entitled to feel betrayed if an author uses their story to say “wait for it” in order to convince you to stick with their story and then delivers the opposite after you do.

May i ask, where was the “wait for it” with destiel? this ties in directly to the queerbaiting. i indicated in my post/reply that while i see it from cas, there’s been little to no hint of any reciprocation of feelings from dean, and if anything the past 7 or so years have driven the point home that it isn’t happening. i personally am not able to see the “Wait for it” and that was the point of my question. without the “Wait for it”, i also can’t see the queerbait. 

I asked for specifics and while i totally get not having the spoons, you provided a few:

(off the top of my head for Dean though, the mixtape, his response to Cas’ death at the end of 12, subsequent grief arc, and reaction to Cas’ return in the front half of 13 rank highly. His reaction to Lucifer’s prank call in 15x19 might rate, but maybe just because it’s so recent.)

not trying to be unkind here, but i quite genuinely don’t see any of these examples as framing cas and dean in a romantic light, or as hinting at a “what if”. the mixtape is like.... okay, maybe. i had read that as being symbolic of something else, but i can see wanting to read it from a shipping lens. (i don’t however think i’d read it as baiting or “what if” - it was quite textually not framed that way. shipping, 100%, but canon build-up, not for me).

for the other examples -- grieving for someone you consider family? and being happy when they come back? that’s not shippy to me. i mean - contrast the grief he showed over cas’s death compared to his grief over, say, mary? or, less extreme, charlie? and nothing compared to how off the rails he goes when sam is dead or he thinks sam is. so i -- i just can’t see those as creating a narrative that demands a follow-through. and when your friend who is dead calls your phone? of course you hop to the door - i don’t know what is romantic about that. sam would’ve hopped just as quick if “cass” had called his phone instead.

and look - i see what is fun to ship about all that. if i shipped it, i’d be happily collecting these moments with a smile and grinning to myself about how cute they are and much they mean. but shipping it vs. it being romantically framed in the canon are two fundamentally different things. shipping doesn’t imply narrative buy-in or deliberation from the creator.

moving on, you also spoke at length about 15x18:

15x18 made the sort of statement that drew back even people who did exactly what OP said they should do, turning off the TV years ago. It wasn’t a quiet “if you’re still watching, keep waiting,” so much as a shouted “hey we’re gonna do this thing, watch this!”

i guess destiel fans vs. those of us who don’t ship it really see this as fundamentally different. because you discuss that moment as one which requires follow-through, and say that if this were heteronormative m/f love declaration, there would be that expectation of follow-through. not necessarily reciprocity, but more - more conversation, more acknowledgment, more something.

(i mean - if there was more, but that more was “hey i love you too but only platonically, sorry man” would that be better?)

but no - i actually just... disagree with your point on that front. i can see why you feel the way you do and i acknowledge that it can be read as the start of a conversation. to me though -- and clearly, now that the finale is out, how the writers saw it -- that was actually the end of a conversation. the end of, like you pointed out, 12 years. a 12-year conversation that ends in a gorgeous declaration of love, and specifically how love isn’t about being together, it’s simply about being - it’s about the fact that you love someone, and that feeling alone is the most beautiful thing in existence.

to me, that declaration can only be written and interpreted as an ending.  a sacrifice, a declaration, and a goodbye. so - while i kind of expected seeing more people in episode 20 and realize that didn’t happen largely due to covid - i’m not disappointed we didn’t see cas, because that culmination of his narrative (and then knowing he was with jack, after, rebuilding the heaven that he rebelled against and finally completing his narrative circle by fixing all the problems with it alongside the good god he sought to find all along) is kind of perfect. 

and i genuinely don’t think if cas was in a female vessel this entire time that that would change. maybe some audience members would feel differently, but i think many of us would see it for the end it was nonetheless. there’s plenty of stories with m/f ships that are one-sided and that character sacrifices themselves for the person they love, so i don’t see why this would be any different (except the bury your gays issue, but that’s a whole other and very real conversation about media tropes).

moving on to the series finale.

As many people have pointed out in praise of 15x20, Sam is the absolute most important thing in Dean’s life, his priority above anything and everything… And yet there, at the actual end of the world, Dean ignores Sam’s call and instead cries over the loss of Castiel. Dean’s loss of Castiel plays in tandem with the loss of literally the whole world. But we’re not to take that as a promise that Castiel means more to this story, or to Dean, than a couple seconds of wistfulness after the dust settles?

I... yeah. i don’t see what this even is arguing. that dean taking a minute to himself to grieve his best friend, who just died in part because dean decided to go hunt down billie (who was literally dying anyway). he’s hurting. there’s nothing about this that’s a promise - it’s an end. it’s grief. it’s the horror of losing someone you care about, and the silence that comes after. it’s fundamentally human in it’s pain. and we, the audience, are invited to grieve with dean.

so I mean - of course cas means more to this story. of course he’s meant more than a few seconds of grief, after 12 years. but just because that’s the last time we see him on screen doesn’t mean we don’t value his story, and celebrate how it too came full circle.

You mention cas as a sort of avatar for a different potential ending for the brothers, and highlight him representing:

An ending where higher powers stop yanking them around and they get to actually live in the life they’ve built for themselves.

So while i never considered cas an avatar for that, i do think we all wanted the brothers to have their freedom. “finally free.” so we can agree on wanting that end. but we disagree on whether it was delivered, i guess? because i feel it was.

you also talk about what you and many other fans conceivably wanted a happier ending to look like. can i -- i’m going to be totally honest. i have not seen a single person who’s critiquing the end saying “i just wanted sam and dean to grow old hunting together with their dog until they retire together and die of old age.”

would that be satisfying to those who are mad about the end? i personally don’t think so, but maybe my opinion is being coloured by the most vitriolic fans i’ve seen. if sam and dean got to have the life they wanted free of chuck, and dean didn’t die, and they kept going (or retired and opened a bar together!). maybe sam still had a kid, but again because romance wasn’t the point, the wife wasn’t important and they left her blurry still so we could interpret ourselves if she was a wife or a co-parent or a surrogate or what. maybe dean has a kid too, with a similar question-mark-wife. maybe we get a few images of them having a holiday with jodie and the girls. and then getting to heaven together in old age, greeting bobby with a beer, and going for a drive.

would that be an end that wouldn’t cause fandom uproar? i would enjoy it, soft an slightly discordant as it would be to me. i prefer the ending we got, bittersweet and heartbreaking though it was, but i wouldn’t be taking to social media to yell about it if we got a softer epilogue, so to speak.

on the other hand... would that still not be enough, at least not for so many of the angry fans? i’m genuinely unsure. it seems to me that so much of the ire is about destiel itself, even if people are pretending it’s about more and other things than that. not everyone, but like, a big portion of them. which leads me to believe that nothing short of dean and cas at least interpretable as together is what they wanted. if every other single thing about the existing finale was the same except that cas was the one to greet dean instead of bobby, and even with the same basic dialogue, without discussing the confession, but they have a lingering smile, and dean leaves to drive and wait for sam with the promise he’ll see cas later - 

if everything else stayed the same except who greeted dean, i genuinely don’t believe i’d be seeing almost any critique of the finale on my dash. maybe i’m cynical, but that’s where i’m at.

which is part of why i really struggle to believe that people are engaging in good faith when they critique the finale. because i feel like if it offered them either a) everything they’re purportedly asking for but still no cas and zero hint of destiel, vs. b) every other thing they claim to hate stays the same except there’s a wink and nod to destiel - i believe they would take the wink and nod. 

   On to some other things you raised:

But how can you know to walk away from a tragedy if the tragedy says “the end won’t be a tragedy, keep watching” right up until it ends in tragedy?

Oh i Get this. I hate thinking i’m consuming fun media only for it to rip my heart out at the end. i’ve literally - well, i’ve had a very unpleasant and distressing experience of this, actually. so i get it. also the opposite: i sometimes feel disappointed when i’m consuming media that is gripping and intense and painful, but then the end is too easy, too soft and happy?

BUT - supernatural never pretended it would have a happy end? the end was so. much. happier. than i ever expected. the Swan Song end was going to have Sam in hell being tortured by lucifer for eternity. according to something i read which i am fundamentally too lazy to link because who knows if it would have turned out this way but -- kripke was apparently going to have Dean jump in the cage with him at that end, if the series ended on S5? the ‘horror’ ending. completely devastating sacrifice for mankind (sam), and completely devastating sacrifice for his brother (dean). just -- oof. even if that wasn’t the plan and the series would’ve ended as the episode did - sam was still in the cage and cas was off waging war in heaven and dean was living every day knowing he was alive and his brother was being tortured.

i’m sorry if you thought you were watching a happier show. i know how much that hurts. that doesn’t mean the story was actually that happy though. sometimes, it’s on us as consumers to acknowledge we were misreading the media. i’ve had to do this. it’s hard, it hurts, but it helps you consume things healthier. i’ve had to do this growing recently, and i’m better off for it.

regarding the specific manner of dean’s death - that’s really not what my post was about and i’m not gonna address it here. i’ve talked about it elsewhere and so have others, and @lovetincture‘s original post spelled it out beautifully, in how human it was. i have feelings on how and why i loved dean’s death, and why it was the absolute opposite of what Chuck’s ending was and what he wanted (no blaze of glory), but i’ll leave those for another time.

They cast aside all the relationships they’ve built. [...] They lost/walked away from the life and home they built in the bunker. Dean got a season 1 death. Sam got a season 1 life.

I feel that there is a very huge difference between regression and progression when it comes to cyclical storytelling. And that difference seems to be missing from the ongoing discussions i’ve seen about this in fandom.

Coming full circle to season 1 does not at all mean that the development is ‘undone’ or that the story has regressed or that anything has been lost or destroyed. It can mean that, if the storyteller doesn’t know what the hell they’re doing, but in this case i don’t (personally) feel it’s a fair critique.

Dean’s death might parallel his s1 not-quite death from Faith, but the s15 result of that death is night and day. Dean is no longer alone. Dean does not go up to a lonely heaven filled with bittersweet memories, where even his canonical soulmate and him have wide gulfs between the memories they fill their shared heaven with. Dean dies a hunter, but he dies a hunter who literally saved earth and changed heaven and gets to spend eternity with his brother, side-by-side and together without all the pain and miscommunication, and he gets to see his family and loved ones too. he died having literally made the world so much better.

even without that though?

his story comes full circle, but dean’s character development isn’t about his death, it’s about the fact that in the first several seasons dean could hardly admit he cared without acting like his teeth were being pulled. he was too afraid of abandonment to ask for someone to be by his side. he was too afraid of rejection to let anyone in. and in the end? he asks sam to stay. he tells him that he loves him. he pours his heart out and says all the things that 15 years ago were stoppered in his throat, words trying and failing to claw their way free but his hurt and fears were too deep.

dean is free.

the point of dean’s story coming full circle to season 1 parallels was specifically to highlight this incredible development, not to undermine it. he is different. he is free. 

god it makes me tear up just thinking about how happy i am for him despite how gutted i was by that scene??

(i could write a similar analysis for sam, about how he left for stanford to escape his life and how his finale life montage bits were the opposite of that, but honestly this post is long enough already).

Destiel is loosely a part of that promise in the sense that Castiel is a part of that promise. The symbol of free will

You make a super interesting argument about Cas being a symbol of free will. I don’t have much to say about it, because I’m gonna mull it over, because I think it’s kinda cool and I’ve never thought about it.

That’s - all i’ve got. thanks again for engaging. i’m happy to continue the convo if you have questions or want to reblog/reply 

(though my followers might hate me omg, i’ve been spamming long spn meta posts for weeks now, it’s just been so confronting to see the ongoing fan reaction on twitter and how divided it is...)

#spn meta #supernatural #supernatural meta #spn #fandom discussions #uhhh what do y'all want me to tag this #it's not wank? #it's an open discussion which i like a lot #hmmm #discourse #i'll just go with that #destiel #kind of #this won't show up in the ship tag because that's not in the first 5 tags so i'm safe i hope #don't wanna be a dick and put this in the ship tag #long post #long post for ts #sorry if there are typos it is almost midnight and i am sleepy

[theobsessor1]

Drunken Noodle

Summary: Deceit should know better, going through with another one of Remus’s ideas. He thought it would have been a one time deal, just something for them that night to experiment with his more reptilian side. But he’s starting to regret it with the growing nest of eggs, and horrible uncertainty of feelings swirling in his chest...he might be in some trouble here.

Pairings: mild intrulogical, qpp demus, hinting at Lociet

Warnings: drinking, alcohol. hinting at slight alcoholic problem.

Word count: 3087

previous chapters ch.1, ch.2, (read on ao3)

(wish to support me buy me a coffee :3)

Chapter 3 of “Say Something” series

Deceit huffs, sitting partially slouched over the dinning table as he sips from his wine glass, munching on gummy rats that Remus had summoned him to help brighten his sour mood. Said creative side was currently sitting across from him going on about something or another.

Deceit wasn’t paying attention, just enough to mindlessly nod when needed, letting the side jabber and get his energy out while the snake side sulked. Hmm...maybe he should pay Remy and Emile a visit. He hadn’t gone to see them since...well, it’s been awhile. 

It took him a moment to realize that Remus had stopped talking, The Duke had turned to stare at the stairs of the subconscious that led up to the mindscape...Standing at the bottom of them was Logan, he was just there! Casually looking around the room where he stood. It’s quite a surprising site to see, no wonder it drove Remus speechless. Well besides the fact that he’s obviously rather fond of the other side. After a moment, Deceit clears his throat. “Can we not help you?” 

“Actually, yes. I wanted to talk to you about something.” Logan straightens his tie and clears his throat, brushing off the fact he hadn’t realized the two sides were at the table. “Oh?” 

“Well more specifically, the events that occurred during our discussion with Thomas earlier today. I wanted to apologise on the behalf of the other. They were rather dismissive of you, despite you bringing up some rather valid points. I..” Logan coughs. “You can say I understand to a degree the feeling of being brushed over, so to speak, and that I inf act do not condone such behavior especially to someone who is actually contributing and trying to help.” 

Deceit has to take a moment to collect his thoughts and form proper words through the fuzzy haze of alcohol... This almost seems like some joke. “...Thank you for the apology, though it’s rather unnecessary. You're not the one that needs to apologise, if you want me to be honest you deserve an apology more than me” he points at Logan with an unimpressed lift of his brow. 

The spectacled side sighs “Regardless, I bring the apology and regret that I had not attempted to get them to listen to you.” “It’s whatever. I appreciate it I guess.” Deceit mumbles, waving a hand concedingly and taking another sip of wine clearly not very concerned with this conversation. 

“I could tear out their tongues for you!” Remus offers, way too excited at the idea. Logan frowns shaking his head “That’s...very thoughtful of you Remus, but I don’t think that’ll be necessary.” 

“It would be more fun to shove them down the stairs, like a couple of really annoying slinkies” Deceit adds mumbling into his drink Remus snickers nodding while Logan shakes his head “I appreciate your offer and suggestions, but that’s still a no. We want them to listen, not get them hurt.” 

Deceit stands from the table swaying almost like a snake influenced by a snake charmer. “Well, that is much easier said than done. They’re bound to get hurt before they start listening to anyone.” He picks up his glass intent to make his way to the couch “You’ve said your apology, you don’t have to stick around any longer.” Logan raises a finger, opening his mouth to speak only to close it as he squints at the snake side as Remus gets up coming behind Deceit and scooping him up into his arms, spawning tentacles from his back to help properly support the side in his arms. Using one of said tentacles to slip the wine glass away from the snake sides reach. “Is he drunk?” 

Deceit hisses, attempting to wiggle from Remus’s grasp and snatch his drink back “I’m not drunk...yet...I think.” 

“...Do you intend to get drunk?” The logical side crosses his arms, frowning at them. Deceit shrinks down on himself guiltily 

“...Maybe…” 

Logan’s frown deepens as he shakes his head “I’m getting you a glass of water, have either of you eaten anything?”

Remus carries a definitely not pouting Deceit over to the couch where Logan had pointed for them to sit as the snake side replies “I’ve only eaten a few gummies so far.” 

“I ate ass!” The duke enthusiastically answers plopping onto the couch and still holding the grumpy snake side protectively in his arms and tentacles.

“He means a peach.” 

Logan huffs heading into the kitchen, making himself at home as he goes about sifting through the cabinets and fridge “I’m going to make the two of you something proper to eat, do either of you have any dietary restrictions?” 

Remus nods with a bounce, he knows the answer to that! “DeeDee doesn’t like mushy stuff ‘n I don’t like citrus.” Logan nods, filing that information away for later. He has managed to find a box of noodles and some tomato sauce, spaghetti is easy to make and hopefully satisfying to the two sides. It grows quiet for a while save for the sounds of Logan cooking, filling a pot with water and setting on the stove to boil with the noodles. 

Remus plays with Deceit’s hair keeping himself occupied as they await the meal. Something must be up, why else would the logical side have decided to suddenly care to apologize to him, to care if he was drunk or for that matter make them food?? Wasn’t he the one that usually would argue that they didn’t need it?

Deceit can’t help but squint suspiciously at the side, “You’re totally not planning something?” he hisses flicking his tongue out with his words. 

“Well, I”m planning to feed you some spaghetti and try to get you to drink some water to help keep you hydrated from your consumption of alcohol.” The snake side huffs knowing that was the logical side's so called plan. But he wants to know the real one! He opens his mouth to say as much but Logan continues “Maybe re-discuss points from earlier conversation with the others and Thomas since, well, neither of us got to share our opinions on the matter...If that is what you are asking?” 

Deceit sits up, turning around on the couch and propping himself up on his elbows to look at the logical side, eyes narrowed. That can’t possibly be all. There’s gotta be something else here, he’s sure of it. 

Remus finishes the braid he’s been working on, wiggling happily at his work before starting another. “I could think of some tasty things to do instead off boring ol’ talk!~” 

The snake side sighs “Remu-” “Oh! I tried that mushroom thing from Hannible! You gotta come check out the corpses with me!” 

“Re-” “The roots really did spread through the whole body! I got one of them to be oozing-” 

Deceit huffed snapping his fingers to focus the creative side’s attention, the duke’s mouth clicking shut and heading whipping around to find the sudden source of noise.

“I know you want to talk to him about all those wild ideas of yours dear, but do you think you can wait till after I interrogate him?” 

“Oh! Yeah, I’ll wait!” Remus nods his head like a bobble head, stilling as he goes back to focusing on playing with Deceit’s hair, a third braid in the making...he might be attempting to stick an eyeball in it...or a tooth. 

Logan adjusts his glasses as his brows furrowed in confusion, the glasses fogged slightly from the steam of the cooking pasta “Interrogate me? What for?” 

“Well see Logan, you never come down to this part of Thomas’s mind. Nor really have you ever shown an interest in our care, save for Remus of course when he’s visiting you but that's just a given.” he makes an offhanded gesture to Remus “So tell me, what is your true motive for all this.” 

Logan pauses in his task of stirring the pasta sauce “My motive?” 

“Yes your motive, I may be intoxicated but I can still tell when something is suspiciousss.” 

Logan tilts his head at the snake side, beginning to absentmindedly stir the pot again. “Have I been acting suspicious. I do suppose a divergence from usual patterns would make something seem suspicious and put you on edge.” he thinks aloud. 

He shakes his head, turning the heat off the stove and mixing the sauce into the noodles. “I have no secret motive, no ulterior plan, I am merely tired of the treatment and order of things...of course that’s now paired with the fact that I am concerned about your alcohol consumption.” 

Deceit rolled his eyes “Well the whole treatment and order is going to be harder to change than just coming over for a visit…” he moves from Remus’s grasp to lean over the back of the couch “And my so called alcohol consump-consumption is fine! I didn’t have a lick of it for a couple of weeks!” Of course that was because he wasn't about to drink such stuff while he was preg- for reasons, wasn’t drinking it for specific reasons he will not ever talk about...yes.

...for a pink and yellow, brown speckled reason currently in his bedroom hidden with the other one. 

Logan hummed, not convinced as he made plates, putting the finished spaghetti on dishes before carrying them to the table “Either way, you two are eating and then getting to bed. No shenanigans or schemes, whatever it is you two do when left alone down here.” 

Deceit can’t help but pout at that, he doesn't have plans for the night but still, he doesn't want to be told what to do and be put to bed like some child thank you very much. 

Remus finishes with the sides hair and scoops him into his arms again. “I can walk myself!” 

“I know” :D

Stuck being carried it seems, the snake side just sighs, there’s no use fighting Remus, they’re both touch starved as is and the dukes pentiant for just snatching and carrying people around is a constant. 

He gets gently deposited into his usual place setting at the head of the table, Remus sitting by his side and eagerly digging into the food...he does notably try at an attempt to be polite and use a fork as he stuffs his face tonight. 

Deceit sulks conjuring himself a wine glass by his bowl, eyes widening when Logan snatches it away and puts a glass of water down. “Excuse me?” 

“No more wine tonight. Water” 

Remus giggles at his expression, the snake side not used to someone trying to boss him around like this. 

He can’t help lifting a challenging eyebrow at the logical side “No wine?” Deceit waves his hand over the glass of water turning it into a glass of whiskey on the rocks “Fine.” 

Logan raises an eyebrow back, clearly unimpressed and frowning. He gives a huff taking the glass, poofing it out of existence and putting a glass of water down once again. 

Deceit flicks his wrist changing the water to vodka, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he watches Logan. The logical side huffs “enough” he snaps turning the drink back into water “you will drink the water, eat and then we can assist you to your room for re-” “No!” 

Logan sputters to a stop startled by Deceit’s sudden shout and looking to the snake side with bewilderment.

Deceit blinks before flushing lightly as he looks down at his place sheepishly, he hadn’t even realized he had stood, now seating himself back down. “Apologies...I um I would just prefer not to be in my room tonight.” he pokes at his plate with his fork hoping Logan wont see through his lie

“R-right.” Logan clears his throat, adjusting his tie in that lil tick of his “Well, then um we can make you comfortable on the couch then? Will that suffice?” 

Deceit quickly nods “yes, the couch will be fine.” 

The dinner seems to be rather dull after that, Remus and Logan going back to discussing what Remus had done in the imagination inspired off of the Hannibal episodes they have watched together. Janus watches them chatter fondly, the two animatedly talking and gesturing back and forth...It’s nice seeing the two enjoy themselves like this. Especially Logan, it’s not often you get to see the logical side light up like this. 

With a small hum he stands with his empty bowl taking it over to the sink without a word, not wanting to interrupt. 

He tries to walk past the table without being noticed, if he can sneak past he may be able to make an escape to the imagination and to his two favorite traits. Of course things never go as planned, why would they. Remus immediately perks up and the creaking of his chair is the only warning Janus gets before the creative side pounces, pinning him to the ground.

Janus sighs with a groan “Really? Remus why-” they both pause with confusion and looking to the dining table, hearing a small giggle and a snort. 

Logan was watching them, a hand covering his mouth to stifle the sound of a laugh, eyes full of amusement and fondness...they made the logical side laugh?!

Remus's eyes sparkle surprised that he got Logan to genuinely laugh! He beams excitedly at the logical side “You laughed!” 

Logan blinks, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink as he quickly lowers his hands “I-I um think you misheard.” 

Remus shakes his head quickly scooping up Janus and holding him out to Logan like one holds a feral cat away from themselves “No! I heard it! J-eh Dee-Dee did too!” 

Janus gives Logan a disgruntled look but nods, not appreciating how he’s being held “I did here it too. You do realize you can’t exactly lie to me right?” he flicks out his tongue at Logan as if to emphasize he can sense them. 

Logan sighs fiddling with his tie “Remus I don’t think it’s good for you to hold Janus like that. Why don’t you get him to the couch and I can get him some pillows and blankets from his room.” he suggests quickly in an attempt to change the subject. 

Remus nods, eyes still sparkling as he pulls Janus closer, of course it's a bit of an issue when the snake side is wriggling and squirming as if trying to escape. “No! Don’t you dare go into my room!” 

Remus takes a hurried step back conjuring his tentacles again to try and keep a hold of the snake side who's baring his fangs at Logan and hissing angrily. 

Logan flinches, face scrunching with confusion as he quickly puts his hands up “I apologize, I didn’t mean to over step! I won’t go into your room if it makes you uncomfortable.” 

Janus calms, going still in Remus’s arms looking a bit disgruntled as he gives one last soft hiss at Logan. 

Logan huffs and Remus turns around so Janus can’t look at Logan anymore “Welp I think Logan had the right idea, someone had too many silly drinks, bed time!” 

Janus whines “I did not have too many, and I'm not tired. Put me down.” 

Remus shakes his head dropping Janus right onto the couch “Nope, it's bedtime! I’m putting you to bed and ain’t nothing you doing about it.” Janus makes more unhappy noises before squeaking at the sudden weight of Remus flopping on top of him. 

“You're not even going to let me get comfortable?” 

“Nope” >:3

Janus huffs glaring at the ceiling of the living room resigned. 

Logan smiles making his way over “Maybe it would be best to let him get comfortable, I don’t think I’ll be able to sit with you otherwise.” he pauses “That is of course if it's alright if I stay?” 

Janus sighs as Remus quickly scoots off him “Might as well, you’ve made yourself at home thus far.” he sits up to move to the side so that Remus and Logan can probably cuddle, only to stiffen up when he’s suddenly squished between the two sides. 

Remus wiggles some before snapping his fingers and changing them all into comfortable t shirts and pajama shorts before wrapping Janus up in a blanket “You gotta wrap Dee up in a blanket so he can burrow and stay warm, otherwise you get a grumpy snek who can’t sleep.” 

Janus sputters glaring at Remus from his cozy blanket burrito“Don’t give away my weaknesses!” 

Remus ignores him, smiling at Logan “and squish him! He sleeps best when squished” 

Janus hisses as Remus leans on him more, and makes an offended noise when he is shushed by the creative side. And again when Logan leans on him next. He’s definitely squished between the two sides now. 

No escape! Damn it!

Remus snickers resting his chin on top of Janus’s head as Janus yawns, his forked tongue curling. Janus huffs giving a weak shove at the creative side. 

Logan watches fondly “You two seem...rather close? But I suppose that’s a given with the two of you living together down here for so long?” 

Remus nods “Something like that, and well-” he shrugs unsure what the right words would be “ I don’t know, I’m wild and feral and got no boundaries, and Dee’s the exact opposite, balance each other, I guess.” 

Logan nods, watching amusedly as Janus’s eyes grow heavy. 

“You would think that we would hate each other but we kinda just found our own system of things together that works for us…” Virgil used to be part of that too, but well...guess yeah win some you lose some or...whatever that saying is.

Logan hums resting his head near Remus’s “and...you don’t suppose...that I could possibly join this system? I um” Logan clears his throat looking away nervously “I um mean more so if its alright I keep visiting for the most part. You always visit me an-” “yes” 

Logan pauses looking to Remus 

“Yes, you can come visit, it’s not like we can stop you” Remus smirks at him “think of yourself as an honorary member here, i'll make ya a badge and everything.” 

Logan smiles before they both blink and look down, hearing soft sleeping noises coming from Janus, a lil bit of his tongue sticking out as he sleeps. 

Remus snickers at that, getting himself more comfy. "Heheh… sleeping snek…"

#egg fic #Say Something #Deceit sanders #Remus sanders #Logan sanders #sander sides au #Writing is hard #demus #intrulogical #lociet

[jadelotusflower]

Robin Hood Rewatch: 2x12 The Return of the King

The Return of the Birds! Have we seen them since the beginning of the season? Also Vaisey’s only scene in the episode (if you don’t count his one line offscreen at the end).

A bit of light comedy with Much hating the cave, liking the bat, and fighting with Allan over bread before Will drops “the king is coming” bomb. DUN DUN.

“Well excuse me for being pleased that all our prayers are answered!”

I love Marian’s defensive flip out of Guy’s grip and unrepentant hoodie flip-hands on hips. I also love her hair here.

How many times has Guy literally shown/told Marian about a horde of money only for it to be stolen immediately afterwards?

Robin skulking around the washing line very ostentatiously talking to Thornton, a character I quite enjoy. A man of divided loyalties, who I only noticed this episode wears an earring.

It always feels like this scene was meant to have Robin and Marian sparring as they argued - she’s practicing rather forlornly with her sword against a pillar, and Robin shows up carrying a long stick that seems like it could be used as a quarterstaff, but that he does nothing with during the scene except lean against it.

As usual they both have good points but talk past each other - Marian that she’s making the best of a bad situation and trying to protect her father, Robin that she uses him as an excuse, and acquiring ill-gotten wealth through marriage is hardly in line with her ideals.

“I have a plan of my own.” That last point got through to her, although it’s a plot contrivance that the wedding has to take place the same time the King visits Nottingham and no one thinks this is odd or reason to suspect something is up. 

Djaq’s little wave! Your face madam.

I do like that Robin figures out Marian’s plan to rob Guy almost immediately.

“I will think about you when I take her to the marriage bed” is perhaps not quite the burn you think it is, Guy. Also interesting that this is perhaps the first time Marian sees Guy mask off.

“Goodnight, gents.” I love Allan.

Marian bleeds more here than she does in the season 2 finale.

I am a sucker for Marian being carried into the cave with the slo-mo and her Theme playing. John is also very tender with her which is sweet.

Is this the first time Marian and Djaq have interacted directly? This episode scrapes by the Bechdel test.

Jealous Robin is jealous but he’s not necessarily wrong, although Marian’s feelings for Guy are more complicated than he gives her credit for. Marian’s also not wrong when she calls him out for supporting her even less than her father does.

Robin’s barb about the embroidery is harsh even if he immediately takes it back (a pattern!). But it doesn’t seem to have too much heat, because they joke about it the next morning (?? How much time has passed?) Also at some point between him storming out and her waking up he’s kept vigil over her, and she’s sleeping with her hand on his shoulder. I also find him stroking her hair and bopping her on the nose very cute.

LOL

“Special girl’s food” is an iconic line for a reason, but I also have a soft spot for Much’s egg or bacon dilemma and “she can’t have both, I don’t care who she is.”

Djaq’s calm determination contrasted with Much’s flittering nervous energy is why I enjoy their dynamic so much. 

Robin and Marian finally being honest with each other, and a really great scene. Robin finally hearing praise from Marian, but stopping her because it doesn’t matter in that moment, then finally admitting to her that she was right about his glory seeking. In many ways the mutual validation is more important than the I love yous preempted by Djaq (”I love you, you love me, we all love each other”).

Much coming in to see the surgery from afar and the slow tracking shot in to see Marian unconscious is a neat directorial choice. A well directed episode overall actually, well done Matthew Evans.

Pitts is a great villain actually, fair facing to Robin and Co but appropriately slimy in his reveal.

“I thought if I survived the Holy Land, that I would die by the fire in Locksley, not in a FOREST, in some poxy, poxy CAVE!” One of my favorite lines in the whole show. Once again I say Sam Troughton MVP.

I am also a sucker for a deathbed love confession, and Robin’s breakdown with Marian’s Theme in the background always gets me. But I am still so mad because this works so well, it only makes the season 2 finale so much worse and unnecessary, because we’ve SEE how Robin and Co react to Marian’s (apparent) death, there’s no need to explore that further, and is the worst kind of re-tread, lazy writing. But we’re not there yet, so I digress.

This is one of my favourite episodes, the ramping tension, the arc of the Robin/Marian relationship, John, Djaq, and Much rallying to help Marian, the subplot of Allan and Will’s very valid concerns about what happens when the King returns, and a great cliffhanger.

#robin hood rewatch #robin hood bbc #1x12 the return of the king #long post

[neochatarra]

8 Untold Signs Of Narcissist People

Sometimes the signs of narcissism aren't so obvious and narcissists fly under our radar. Not every narcissist may be a puffed-up addict or a Mean Girl like Regina George. If they were, we could see the signs from a mile away and steer clear. No, many narcissists are sensitive, thoughtful, and generous – until the charade wears off, of course.

That's why it's so important to know the subtle signs of narcissism that you simply won't notice until it's too late and they've sucked you into their region.

What's the Difference Between an Overt and Covert Narcissist?

Many people tend to consider narcissists as having extroverted personalities. They're flamboyant and demand to be the middle of attention – how are you able to miss them?

The truth is, introverts also can be narcissists. These are those who fool us into their web of manipulation.

"They're not self-absorbed – they're just sensitive!"

"They're not a nasty friend – they're just misunderstood!"

After forming a relationship with a covert narcissist, you realize that this sensitivity and isolation were, in fact, signs of narcissism. Since the signs weren't so obvious, however, you completely misjudged things.

8 Signs of Narcissism You Can't-Miss

Since the covert narcissist is best at hiding their abusive behavior, it's important to know the subtle cues that give them away.

1. They'll Never Utter the Phrase "I Don't Know"

I once knew a narcissist who was so averse to the present phrase that he would rather give someone dangerously incorrect answers than admit to not knowing something. He was confident in his woefully wrong answers, too.

Why do this?

Answering an issue with "I don't know" deprives the narcissist of important attention. The person seeking a solution will simply advance to somebody else who might help them. That's an enormous ego hit.

That's why you'll often find narcissists rambling on about topics they need no business speaking on.

2. They Are A Nasty Friend

The narcissist is usually a nasty friend but you'll typically find them playing the victim. confirm to urge all sides of the story if you're unsure.

What are some red flag signs of narcissism that indicate the suspect may be a narcissist?

• They get irritated when their friends invite help or advice.

• They don't bother to call or text their friends on birthdays or holidays.

• They don't return borrowed items. (A sign of entitlement.)

• They owe their friends money. they'll downplay this as "not an enormous deal."

• They embarrass their friends ahead of others.

• They hunt down or entertain their friends' partners or love interests.

They also treat waitstaff or service workers poorly. This is a dead giveaway. run the hills. Anyone who disrespects waitstaff or service workers views people as "beneath" them. Soon, you'll be a part of the inferiors also.

3. They Need To Insert Themselves Into Every Story

A covert narcissist might not demand everyone's attention. They will, however, still find how to form everything about them. an outsized part of this strategy involves inserting themselves into every story.

Is a coworker talking about their experience with homelessness? The narcissist, too, features a story about being poor.

Is a lover talking about his amazing trip to Vietnam? The narcissist also had a friend who visited Vietnam. And guess what? She heard it wasn't so great.

No matter the subject, the narcissist features a remarkable skill for turning the eye their way – regardless of how innocuous it'd seem.

4. They're Sensitive

At first, you'll appreciate their ability to freely express emotions. this is often an excellent tactic narcissists use to lure empathetic people into their trap.

Maybe a fast-food worker got their order wrong and therefore the narcissist hasn't shut up about it all day. Maybe their boss asked them to prevent playing on their phone such a lot and now the narcissist is crying about it over dinner.

As time goes on, you'll realize that the narcissist isn't vulnerable and sensitive: their fragile ego can't handle honest mistakes and valid criticism. To the narcissist, these are personal attacks.

5. They Form Relationships Based On What Someone Can "Do for Them"

If you're at a celebration and therefore the suspected narcissist suggests you ask someone because they will help together with your career or financial situation, don't ignore it. They aren't trying to assist you: they're letting you in on their game.

Narcissists tend to make shallow friendships that supported what people can do for them. You'll often find narcissists make friends with horribly toxic people simply because these folks have money, own bars, or offers career opportunities.

6. Their Stories Don't Match Reality

Both the overt and covert narcissist has an inflated sense of self. The thing is, they believe their lies. As a result, you'll often find they recall stories much differently than the situations played out.

If you notice that the suspect constantly reframes stories to form themselves the hero or victim, retreat fast – this is often one among the various signs of narcissism. By changing the story to suit their narrative, the narcissist is gaslighting everyone else involved.

It's not cute or funny to constantly need to correct them. Sooner or later, they'll start gaslighting you, too.

7. They Observe and Judge

"There's no way she will be a narcissist. When we're out with friends, she barely says ten words!"

I hear it all the time. By sitting back and observing everyone, however, the covert narcissist is silently taking notes and judging. I'm sure you heard all about her observations on the car ride home.

The narcissist must feel superior to everyone around them. this is often easy to try to do once you don't open your mouth to interact in conversation and instead sit back to require notes about everyone's shortcomings.

8. They Only Hear Bits and Pieces of Your Stories

Does it desire the suspected narcissist just isn't. listening? They're probably not. And if they're, they don't care.

Maybe you spent ten minutes venting to your mother about how you didn't get that promotion at work because you showed up late one solitary time with a legitimate reason. How did she respond? "Well, maybe you'll remember to point out up on time from now on."

You can't be the victim. Only the narcissist is often the victim.

You see this ton with narcissist parents or partners who listen only enough to toss stuff back in your face later.

How to Turn the Tables on a Narcissist?

Perhaps you've gone on a couple of dates with someone or a replacement coworker joined your team. you think they'll be a narcissist but you aren't entirely sure.

After all, the covert narcissist is especially cunning at hiding the more obvious signs of narcissism. Here's the way to turn the tables on a narcissist and obtain them to show themselves.

• Play along. Don't give the suspected narcissist room to regulate their manipulation tactics – play stupid and pretend you completely believe them. Use this chance to document their behavior.

• Remain indifferent. If you want to continue handling an overt or covert narcissist for reasons out of your control, act indifferent to their behavior. The narcissist wants to use your emotions against you. If you don't give them anything to figure with, they'll seek their fix elsewhere.

• Find Support: this might only include one or two people you trust. open up to someone who will validate and believe you.

At the top of the day, the sole thanks to truly turn the tables on a narcissist are to chop them off completely. If that they had any real intentions of adjusting, they might have done so already.

The narcissist won't suddenly see things your way. If they ever do, it's – a) for a fleeting moment and b) to use against you later. Don't believe the conflicting information you would possibly see from other websites or therapists – the narcissist will never change.

With a mental disease, a chemical imbalance within the brain may cause different disturbances that manifest as depression, anxiety, and lots of others. Although complex, mental illnesses tend to reply well to medication because it targets the physical root of the problem: like a chemical imbalance. Though it's been determined that a lot of mental illnesses like depression and anxiety are frequently caused by unresolved emotional trauma, often dating as far back as childhood.

Personality disorders occur due to a repetitive stimuli-reward environment. At some point in their life, the narcissist realized they might elicit specific reactions and emotions from people – and it felt good and helped them achieve their self-fulfilling agendas.

Anything but cutting them out of your life will offer you a mental and emotional breakdown.

No Contact is that the Only Way to Packing Up A Narcissist

Many narcissists have always been this manner – whilst far back as their teenage or childhood years. If you're handling a narcissist, you can't and will not expect them to vary their behavior now or ever.

Treatment for personality disorders often involves things like cognitive behavioral therapy. In many cases, a narcissist can also suffer from other mental illnesses like depression or substance use disorder. (You've probably heard extensively about these problems, too, when the narcissist needs your sympathy or someone responsible .)

ىDespite this, there's little evidence to suggest therapy works for narcissists as personality disorders are notoriously difficult to treat. the primary step to getting assistance is to admit a drag exists – the narcissist will never believe they need or are a drag.

No Contact is that the only option.

Trust in yourself and your network. Because once you get to the opposite side and stick with No Contact, you'll be amazed by all the amazing belongings you can accomplish.

#narcissitic #narcissist #covert narcissism #narcissismawareness #narcissus