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basically-harley-keener · 2 years

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I drive your truck, I roll every window down

Written By Me.

Also available on ao3 under sammiespider

Harley Keener/Peter Parker

Summary: Peter knows death.He knows what to do when someone dies, you go to the funeral. So when Harley dies, he knows to go to the funeral, but he doesn't know how to cope afterward. How do you even cope with your fiance dying?

The thing about Peter Parker is that he has different ways of coping with death.

Peter has dealt with death a lot. First, when his parents died. Peter cried almost every night at the early age of six. Then, when his uncle was shot right in front of him, Peter then vowed to never let a life slip through his fingers ever again. Most recently, it was Tony. The man who told him to be better, to do better. Which Peter really tried to be. But in the end, Tony Stark's life was ended trying to save the entire world. Peter promised himself that day to let Tony’s legacy live on.

In honor of that legacy, he attended Stark's funeral, and alongside him was May. He turned to look behind him at the log cabin and noticed a blonde teenager standing in the back near Wanda, Bucky, and Sam. Peter made a mental note to talk to him later.

The funeral ended after Pepper dropped the reef into the lake and the attendees made their way inside the Stark cabin. Peter decided it was time to start his search for the mystery blonde boy. He looked around and found him sitting on the couch looking at something on his phone, Peter made his way over to him and sat down next to him.

"Hi, Im P-"

"Peter, I know." The blonde finished. "I know who you are, Tony talked about you"

Peter blushed and tucked his curls behind his ear, "Mr. Stark talked about me?"

"Mhm," The blonde smiled and nodded. "I'm Harley," He said, putting down his phone to shake the brown boy's hand. Peter shook his calloused hand, then retracted his arm.

"Your name is vaguely familiar" Peter tilted his head and told Harley. Harley nodded and began to bite his fingernails

"He liked to keep me a secret" He teased. Peter noticed the joking tone and let out a small, light giggle.

"Yeah..." he said to fill the silence. "How did you know him though?" Peter eventually asked Harley.

"Oh," He smiled brightly, "That's a long story for another time sweetheart." Peter's heart skipped a beat at the nickname. Was this mysterious blonde really flirting with him at Tony Stark's funeral? And how bad was it that he wanted Harley to continue?

Harley did continue, occasionally placing his hand on Peter’s thigh or laughing a bit too much at the younger boy’s jokes. The worst part is that Peter liked it. He liked all of it. Well, all of it except for the fact his mentor and father figure just died. The whole funeral part felt wrong, but talking to Harley felt right.

Peter didn’t know how long he’d been talking to the blonde until May came over and tapped him on his head. Peter looked up “Oh hey, Aunt May” He smiled at her and stood up.

“Hey, ready to get outta here?” She spoke softly, head tilting towards the door at the word ‘outta’. He shrugged and looked at Harley.

“Can I get your number?” Peter asked Harley cautiously. He didn’t want to scare off the blonde, but much to Peter’s surprise Harley nodded and began to stand up. That was when Peter noticed the height difference. Now don’t get me wrong, Peter wasn’t short. He was an average-sized male, 5’8’’. But Harley was tall, He was at least six feet if not more. The shorter boy’s eyes widened at the height but tried not to make it extremely obvious. But Harley noticed… He definitely noticed.

“Well, are you gonna hand me your phone or are you just gonna stand there and look pretty?” Harley teased Peter and snapped him back into reality.

“Oh uh- Yeah” He quickly opened the phone and handed it to Harley. Harley opened up the messages app and texted himself.

“There you are, sweetheart. Talk to you soon” He smiled, handing the cracked phone back to the shorter man.

They did talk soon.

They spoke a lot actually. They talked for hours at a time. Oh, and they started dating but I thought with Harley’s flirting that would be obvious. It only took three weeks of constant phone calls and constant texting for Harley to ask Peter to be his boyfriend. Peter smiled on the facetime call and nodded.

“I would love to, but only if you promise to come up to Queens next week and stay with us” He begged. Peter would ask this all the time, even before Harley asked him out. Harley blushed

“As your new boyfriend-” He stopped for a moment to admire the word. “- I promise to make the trip up to be with you as soon as I can”

“When’s that!” Peter whined. Harley chuckled and smiled impossibly more, he was so happy right now.

“Spring break”

“Harls.” Peter frowned.

“Petey?” Harley teased, knowing he’d get a reaction. Peter rolled his eyes and covered the camera.

“Aww c’mon now sweetheart, let me see your pretty face,” He said softly. Peter gave in and uncovered the camera. “Happy?

“Very”

“Bitch.”

“Says you.” Harley retaliated.

The night before spring break finally rolled around and Harley was packing to see his boyfriend when his mom knocked “Come in” Harley answered, too focused on the green suitcase in front of him to turn around.

“Harls…” She spoke softly, coming to touch her son on the middle part of his back. Harley leaned his head onto hers and hummed. “I’m losin’ my mind ma.”

“No, you ain’t. Your jus’ findin’ your way to your heart.” She smiled and looked up at the ceiling above Harley’s bed. There was a gay pride flag above where he slept that she had bought for him when Harley came out to her. He hugged his mom and sighed

“I think once I graduate I’m gonna stay in New York for a bit. If that’s alright?” He asked her but kinda also told her. She nodded and let go of her son, she remembered when he was much shorter and she didn’t have to look up to him

“You’re the exact copy of your father.” She smiled. Harley looked down at his feet. “Ma…”

“When he was good and he loved us.” She added. “You look so much like the good side of him. You are so much like the good side of him Harley.” She quickly kissed her son’s cheek and started to head out of the room

“You’re the good side of James with the best part of me,” She said before shutting the door. Harley blushed. James was a good father before booze got ahold of him. The blonde still has a printed photo of him on the corkboard above his desk. He looked at it and unpinned it from the board and put it into the suitcase at the very bottom.

When he finally finished packing, he loaded the suitcase into the passenger seat of his red 2008 Ford F-150 that somehow still ran. He closed the door gently before heading back inside to go to his room. And somehow, it’s like Peter knew exactly what Harley was doing and called him.

“Hi, Harls!” He said cheerfully when Harley answered

“Hey, sweetheart, whatcha up to?”

“Calling you, idiot,” Peter said, flopping down onto his bed.

“Really? I had no clue” Harley chuckled and placed his phone up against a bottle in his room so Peter could see.

“I can’t wait to see you, Harley” Peter hummed.

“Neither can I” Harley smiled and packed his small backpack with his electronics. “Hey, Pete?”

“Hm?”

“When summer comes, I’m gonna come ‘n stay in New York for a bit,” He told him. Harley watched Peter’s smile grow and heard a gasp from the younger boy.

“No way!” He laughed excitedly.

“Yes, way.”

The drive took him over 12 hours and yet he did the ride in one day. He was exhausted when he finally parked in the parking garage for Peter and May’s apartment. The blonde grabbed his bags and made his way toward the apartment building.

Peter was walking around the apartment frantically. “Life 360 says his phone died two hours ago!” He worried “Why doesn’t he have a charger in the car!” He looked at May. May shrugged. Peter sighed and slumped into the couch.

There was a knock on the door. “Well?” May motions towards the door. “Are you gonna get it?” Peter jumped up from the couch and opened the door to see his blonde.

“Harls!” He smiled and jumped onto him. Harley dropped his bags and held the younger man.

“Baby.” Harley hummed and kissed the side of his neck gently.

They’ve never kissed.

They’ve never touched each other like this. This is like a supernova exploding. The emotion the two boys felt in this moment will never be felt by most people. Peter jumped down and looked up at Harley.

“Hi” Peter smiled brightly. Harley leaned down a bit to finally kiss the shorter man for the first time.

May smiled and leaned against the counter. She thought about when Peter told her that he was bisexual and didn’t want her to make a big deal about it. She didn’t, as per his wishes but she did buy him a bi-flag pin for his backpack.

“That was overdue,” Peter stated after the kiss ended. Harley smiled and blushed in agreement.

“Peter, let the poor man inside, he’s been driving all day,” May chuckled and motioned for Harley to come inside. Peter closed the door behind him. Peter couldn’t stop looking at Harley. Fuck he was in deep.

Peter took Harley to the bedroom. “Well, this is my room…” Peter shrugged.

“Hey uh, Pete…” Harley sighed putting his back things down and shutting the door behind him. Peter looked up at the taller man “What?”

“It’s a twin bed…”

“Fuck.” Peter groaned loudly before flopping down onto the floor, inevitably giving up on life. “Why didn’t I even think about that? God damn it Peter” He cursed himself. Harley leaned down next to him even though Peter had his head in his arms.

“Baby.”

“What, ” Peter whined.

“We can both fit, and if not we can sleep on the pull-out couch you talk about having.” Harley tried to calm Peter down. He looked up at Harley and nodded “Okay” He smiled and reached out to touch his boyfriend’s cheek. Harley leaned into the touch and then kissed Peter softly.

“Thank you Harls.”

“For?” Harley asks, now sitting down on the floor instead of kneeling.

“Loving me.”

Harley stayed for a week before he returned to Tennessee. The next time Harley would come to New York, he would never leave. He moved into Stark Tower and soon he and Peter bought their own apartment.

============

Harley loved Peter for almost four years before disaster struck the couple.

The blonde ended up proposing to Peter on their fourth anniversary. They were in the process of planning their wedding when Harley went out for a late-night ride on his motorcycle with a few of his friends. Peter had a night in by himself which he didn’t mind, He enjoyed the quiet every now and then.

Harley told him “It’ll just be a few hours. If you want me to stay, I’ll stay.”

“I’ll be okay Harls. Go, have fun with your friends” The shorter man got up off their bed to give him a quick peck “You look hot in leather.” Peter said before tugging on the collar of Harley’s leather jacket.

“Do I?” Harley licked his lips quickly before leaning down a bit to kiss the other man. Peter nodded with a soft chuckle before kissing him back

“Yes sir.” He smirked and backed up. “Go, have fun. I love you.”

“I love you too, Peter Parker,” He said before walking out of the bedroom.

It wasn’t even two hours until Peter got a call from one of Harley’s friends, Madison. “Peter… I’m-”

“Maddie, w-what's wrong?” Peter said, getting out of bed. Peter was panicked, He never really talked to Harley’s friends often so he knew something was up.

“We were riding- and I’m so sorry Peter” She sobbed into the phone. Peter started to hyperventilate

“Maddie, please just speak to me” He begged “Is Harley all right?”

“No Peter- That's why I'm so sorry.” She cried until her boyfriend took the phone from her. Peter really wasn’t familiar with him either. “Peter, It’s Sterling. Harley was taken to the hospital like three minutes ago. In an ambulance.” He took a breath “He-” Peter heard Sterling choke up a bit before proceeding.

“He was hit by a car while we were riding down 14th Ave” he stated, rushing more like it. Sterling couldn’t believe he was saying those words to his friend’s fiance.

Peter didn’t say anything. How could he?

“Um- which… uh- fuck. Where is he?” Peter asks, frantically getting dressed.

“Mainstreet hospital. Maddie, Jacob, and I will meet you there.” Sterling said.

“Don’t.” He said a bit harshly by accident. “I want to be with him myself if you don’t mind.” Peter said “Please.” He added softly “I’ll call you if anything changes.”

“Of course…” Sterling said before Peter hung up. He called a taxi to the hospital. Peter ran inside and stopped at the reception desk.

“I’m Peter Parker. I’m Harley Keener’s fiance. I need to know if he is okay. Please ma’am” He begged the woman at the desk.

“Give me a moment.” She nodded softly before looking back down at her desktop. Peter watched her scroll through the spreadsheet until she looked back at him.

“He went into surgery almost 6 minutes ago. Seconds after getting here, Mr. Parker”

“No, I-i-i need to see him. P-please ma’am” He grabs onto the counter while he begs. And in the very back of his mind, he is reminding himself that he can in fact crush the counter with his bare hands and he should probably let go. So he does let go and digs his fingernails into his palms “Please.” He adds.

“I’m sorry. You can wait out here until he gets out of surgery,” she says softly while motioning to the chairs against the wall. Peter reluctantly gave in and sat down. He picked at his fingernails, scratched at the inside of his wrist, and twisted his engagement ring until what felt like years later when the woman motioned him up to the desk.

“He’s in room 432,” she said handing him a visitor pass.

“Thanks- Thank you so much.” He said before clipping the badge to his jacket. He ran to the elevators and punched level four repeatedly until the doors closed. He nibbled aggressively on his fingernails until he reached the fourth floor of the hospital. He ran down the hall counting the numbers down in his head until he found 432.

“Hey princess,” Peter whispered when he saw his other half.

“Hey, sweetheart” Harley mumbled, “I missed you.” He reached out to him. Peter smiled softly and took the chair from the edge of the bed and sat beside Harley’s bed.

“I’m glad you’re okay.” Peter said, trying his hardest to not let tears slip out of his eyes “How are you?”

“I’m in a little pain,” he moans slightly “But the doctors stitched me all up and said I could go home on Monday”

“Perfect”

“You’re perfect,” Harley grinned. Peter chuckled and shook his head.

“Yup, the doctor brought you right back to your old self.” He smiled and kissed Harley's hand.

“I told you baby” Harley smiled “Give me a kiss please.” Peter nodded and bent down to kiss his lips, moving his free hand to Harley’s cheek.

Peter had stayed laying with him all night. He didn’t go home when the nurses said “he should probably get some rest” Peter stayed, he stayed petting the blonde's hair until he spoke again around four am.

“I love you…” Harley mumbled softly. Harley's eyes began darting back and forth between Peter and the heart monitor.

“I love you more... “ Peter whimpered “What's wrong?” He asks, noticing Harley panic. Harley's eyes started to close.

“Let me go…” he loosely pulls his arm back from Peter “I want to go," Harley whined, griping his chest now in pain, eyes now back open, wider than before.

“Want to go where sweetheart? Talk to me,” he begs, a few tears now pouring softly out of his eyes. Harley rolled back over to look at him and pointed upwards. His breath was shortening.

“They messed it up, I can feel it.” He coughs aggressively before closing his eyes and reaching out for Peter’s hand.

“Harls you’re okay. Just open your eyes. You’re alive, you are breathing. You’re with me Harley… just look.” He begged. “You’re okay.”

“Peter… when the,” he stopped for a minute due to shortness of breath but was able to continue. “When the crash happened, the medics told me I most likely wouldn’t make it and to tell them if I needed to call someone. But I couldn’t speak-”

“Yeah, but you’re okay now Harley… you are. You’re here with me, with your fiance.” He says rushed. He was confused. He didn't understand why Harley was talking all of this nonsense. He was okay. Harley was alive

“Baby, please… Let me go.” He looked at him, visibly in pain “They didn’t give me a choice about the surgery, they said a 15% survival rate. I heard them talking while they were moving me to surgery. I can’t- it really hurts. Please, let me go… please” He begs, closing his eyes for the last time

“I love you, Peter Parker.” he breathes out softly.

“Harls. Harley. Please wake up. Please” He cried out, leaning against the no longer beating chest, and then, the next few minutes were a blur of emotions, visuals, and sounds. Peter was being rushed out of Harley’s room, followed by Harley’s limp body. Peter stood there in shock watching his now-dead lover being carried down the hall. He was suddenly hit with tears and fell down onto the floor of the hospital crying and screaming and blaming God for everything bad that's ever happened to him.

Peter wouldn’t know it but a few nurses had to pull him off the ground and into a small room for him to calm down. A familiar woman was there when he calmed down some “M-May? May what- why-” He sobbed before she pulled him into a hug. Peter sobbed into her shirt that she’d been wearing all day from her job at the nurse’s station downstairs. “May he’s gone” He sobbed.

“I know baby… I know…” She whispered softly, tears dripping from her eyes as she held onto her nephew.

“How am I supposed to live without him May?” He feels so selfish for asking this question, after all, she’s lost her only love as well. “You’ll learn,” May responds.

“I love him so much,” He cries.

“I know you do,” She holds onto him until he breaks the hug to wipe his eyes “Now what?” he says softly.

“They'll be a funeral and I’m gonna teach you some coping mechanisms. I’m going to stick by you Peter.” She promises. Peter nods with a cry and hugs her again.

Harley James Keener

Beloved son, brother, and fiance

Peter, along with Harley’s mother and sister planned the funeral and it took place six days after Harley Keener had passed away. Peter spent each night of those six nights sitting down and trying to write his eulogy. He knew what he wanted to say, well at least the structure of it. But he couldn't write it. Every time he opened the document he just sat and stared at it and then cried for hours on end.

He moved back in with his aunt after Harley passed away because he didn't want to be in that apartment without Harley and he was having extremely bad nightmares. He would start screaming and May would wake up and have to comfort him. It was terrible for both of them. But before they knew it, they were getting dressed for Harley Keener’s funeral. Peter felt his chest pounding. He felt like he was going to throw up. He looked at his aunt.

“I can’t do this,” He told her.

“You loved him, right?” May asked him gently, she put her hand on his cheek, gently wiping his tears.

“Yes.”

“So you have to go, Peter,” May said.

“I know…” He sniffed and walked away from her to grab his coat. “I’m ready,”.

“Okay, let’s go,” She said, grabbing her keys off the counter.

The drive was silent. Peter stared out of the passenger door of May’s car. Here he goes, to another funeral. Life won’t give him a break. He sniffs and wipes his eyes as the car pulls up to the cemetery.

He gets out of the car and tries to keep his legs stable. He looks around the tent covering the already dug-out hole.

They decided to do a closed casket because when Peter was planning the funeral with Mary and Abbie he mentioned that they did close caskets in the Jewish religion, which Peter was part of and Harley was planning to convert to before their wedding, so the boys could have a Jewish wedding. Mary agreed and let Peter incorporate as many Jewish traditions into Harley’s funeral as he wanted. Mary wanted Peter to feel loved by her because she did love him for how much love Peter gave her son.

Peter sighed deeply and reached out to May so she’ll hold his hand. “Thank you” He whispered.

He wasn’t supposed to walk up to his fiance this way. Peter wasn’t supposed to mourn his fiance, he was supposed to marry his fiance. It hurt so fucking much. Peter’s eyes started to water once again when they reached the tent. “May…”

“You got this” She reminded him. He breathed deeply and let go of her hand to greet Harley’s friends.

Peter wasn’t mad at them, he was just angry at the situation and he blamed them.

“Hey…” He said to them.

“Peter, Hi. How are you feeling?” Maddie reached out to touch his shoulder. Peter backed up and she immediately put her hand back down. “Sorry.” Peter nodded and look at the three of them before walking away. Madison looked at her boyfriend and Jacob.

Jacob whispered “He’s coping and he blames us, it’s normal. He won’t hate us forever.”

And they were right, Peter wouldn’t hate them, he’d just slowly stop talking to them.

“Mrs. Keener,” Peter greeted Mary. Mary pulled him into a hug and cried softly. “Thank you for loving my son.” Peter nodded but was at a loss for words. His tears started to fall again as Mary broke the hug.

The Rabbi started to talk and everyone started to sit down. Peter couldn’t hear a word the Rabbi was saying, he was angry because why is this stranger talking about the man he loved when he knew nothing about Harley? Harley was beautiful. Harley was Peter’s life. And this man is talking about him like he knew him, and he didn’t.

Soon it was Peter’s turn to talk. He grabbed his speech from under his chair and made his way up to the podium. He looked down at the hole, Harley wasn’t down there yet, but he would be shortly. Peter couldn’t stand the thought.

He started to speak.

He read the words on the paper but he had no idea what he was saying. He knows people are listening. He sees Ned and MJ wiping their eyes. He sees Abbie comforting her mother as she sobs into tissues. But he just reads and occasionally wipes his eyes.

He finishes his speech by looking at the sky. “God, please protect my husband”

The funeral ended and everyone made their way to Peter and Harley’s apartment. Peter hadn’t been there since Harley died but Abbie and Mary have been staying in it. He looked around. Mary had prepared lunch for the funeral attendees. Peter smiled slightly as he saw the picture of his fiance, framed on the counter. He sighed and looked behind it at the sandwiches. He decided he wasn’t hungry and walked past the other guests to his bedroom. He gently opened the door and looked at the bed. It was made, Mary must have made it. Peter closed the door and sat down at the edge of the bed and just started to sob.

“Fuck Harley, Why did you leave me?” He looked up, “Harley I needed you. We were almost married, we wanted a daughter. Harley… I can’t go on without you.” He cried. Peter pulled on his tie and tugged it off. He proceeds to throw it on the ground.

“I miss you.”

Months later and Peter purchased a new apartment for himself. He just could not stand staying in the old apartment. It was too heart-wrenching for him. This new apartment stayed bland, Peter didn’t have the energy to decorate his new home. God, he hated that word. This wasn’t his home. This is just where he stayed. His home was a red Ford that stayed in the garage. That's where he felt closest to Harley. He sighed and grabbed Harley’s keys from the dresser where Peter kept them and made his way to the apartment’s shared car garage.

When he got there, he climbed into the too-tall truck and started it. The AC was blaring and the radio station was playing the same country station Harley left it on before he died. Peter looks around, he sees Harley’s favorite pair of work boots in the back, he sees unfinished bottles of Coke and sweet tea rolling around on the floorboards. He sighs and puts the truck in reverse and begins to pull out of the garage. He hums as the music fills the car.

He drives through Queens and into the more rural areas of NYC. Once he’s out of view of the city, he cranks the music up and listens to Harley’s favorite songs. Peter can’t stand country music but he’ll do anything to feel close to Harley again. His Harley. The Harley who drove the same truck since he was 16, the Harley who left his drinks in his truck no matter how often Peter begged him to clean it up, the Harley who loved his southern side but hid it while he lived in New York. Peter’s Harley.

Peter continues to drive until he notices how low the gas is on the truck. He huffs and turns around towards the city. He stops at a station to fill up the truck before heading back to the garage.

“I love you, Harley,” He says as he puts the truck into the park. He says it again as he turns off the engine and he says it one more time as he climbs out of the truck. Peter shuts the door and locks it.

“I love you, Harley.”

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