#too many bad things have happened that resulted in them not responding and i just cant be calm about those situations anymore

[nicksbestie]

hi!! if you’re still doing requests, can i have a chris sturniolo x autistic reader in which reader has a habit of misplacing or losing things, but on a particular she keeps consistently misplacing losing a lot of things that she loves or that she needs and it all results in her having a very bad meltdown in which chris helps calm her down and eventually comforts her in the process?

Meltdown - C. Sturniolo

Summary : You're so lucky to have such a caring boyfriend who knows exactly how to help you in moments of distress <3

Warnings : Meltdown, emotional overwhelm

Word Count : 805

Pairing : Chris Sturniolo/Reader (romantic)

A/N : i loved this req!! neurodivergent reqs are amazing, please keep sending them <3 reminder that ableism is not welcome here!

There were a lot of tendencies that you loved about being neurodivergent, and a lot of the time, you didn’t view yourself as any less than the average person, but there were always a couple traits that really frustrated you when it came to living as an autistic person.

You hated losing things. Not knowing where things were made you very anxious, but unfortunately, you couldn’t seem to stop doing it. No matter where you placed things, or how many times you reminded yourself that they were there, you always managed to end up losing them. 

It was like your brain just blocked out the part where you moved them to a different location, or when someone else told you that they’d put them somewhere else, and you couldn’t find them for hours after that. It often caused you incredible frustration, especially if you’d lost more than one thing at once, and sometimes fueled you to the point of tears. You hated how much this happened to you, but you had no idea how to go about fixing it in any way. Luckily, you were very supported by your boyfriend, who was always good at finding things. 

A lot of the time, he had been the one that moved the lost items, or the one that had seen you move them, and kept a mental note of where they were because he knew you would more likely than not, forget where they had been placed. He had quickly become an expert in keeping those situations from escalating into meltdowns, but sometimes you were just so upset about not being able to find important things that there was nothing he could do except help you find them and just comfort you the best that he could. 

Unfortunately, one of those times was today. You had gone out to run errands, and Chris had come with you, even though it was just a grocery store trip. He often came with you, picking out a bunch of random food for both him and his brothers, some for videos, some just for fun. Because of this, he often wandered into different aisles than the one that you were in, thus going out of your sight. However, you had always remembered what aisle he was in, and he had always texted it to you just in case you forgot. But this time was different. 

Chris had walked away to go to the bathroom, leaving you standing by yourself while picking out the things you needed from that aisle. You weren’t concerned, he had done this before, and always came right back, so you kept moving, grabbing things off of the shelves and putting them into your cart before turning into the next aisle over. Time continued to pass and you tried to brush off the anxiety that was beginning to roll in, but after fifteen minutes and no return of your boyfriend, you couldn’t help the freaking out that was going through your mind. You began taking longer breaths, trying to relax, and moving through the aisles around you to find Chris, but when you had gone through four of them and couldn’t see him anywhere, you couldn’t deny the tears filling your waterline. 

Chris was arguably the most important thing in your life, and the feeling that you had lost him was too much for you to handle at any point in life. He wasn’t responding to your text asking where he was, and this only fueled the anxiety even more. The tears in your eyes had started falling by this point, still moving between aisles and hoping to see his familiar figure. 

Chris had no idea that you were panicking. His phone had died while he was in the bathroom, and he had gotten distracted looking at some of the weird flavors of donuts and Oreos he’d seen on a small stand. It wasn’t until he heard soft crying near him that he realized what had happened, and immediately ripped himself away from the display, turning around to see you wandering between aisles, wasting no time in getting to you and pulling you into a hug. 

Feeling the way that your shoulders shook against his body broke his heart, realizing the effects of what he’d done, despite it being unintentional. He whispered comfort to you, not caring about the people that had slowed down their walking to stare at the couple having a moment in the middle of the bread aisle, only focused on you. Apologies flew through the air along with promises to never leave you, and he refused to let go of you. He led the rest of the grocery trip, getting everything you needed for you, pausing every so often to wipe tears off of your face or to kiss the top of your head.

~ taglist : @blahbel668 @mattsgirlfrieeend @69isabella69 @mayhem-72 @iculdstealurgf @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @sturnioloslife @heartsforkarina @nervousrebelglitter @sturniclo @elliegrace-7 @mattsturnioloisbae

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#sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fluff #sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo fluff #nick sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo age regression #matt sturniolo age regression #nick sturniolo age regression #chris x y/n #chris sturniolo headcanon #christopher sturniolo x y/n #christopher owen sturniolo #christopher sturniolo fanfic #christopher sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo imagine #chris #fanfic #boyfriend chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo x you #sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader

[moonydustx]

AHSHEUWOHDOEHEJDOEJEHD----

LAW IS SO CUTE WHEN HE PROPOSEEEDDD LIKE PLEASEEE I WANT HIM😭😭😭😭

I wonder, does he do the wedding stuff? Like don't sleep with each other before your wedding stuff like that? Old sayings?? Does he even believe them at all?

A/N: Hello! First, thank you for the request ❤️ Sorry for the delay in responding, weekends end up being a busy time for me.

About our beautiful lovebirds: I believe maybe it would be a great mix. Some old sayings like don't see the bride in white I think they would follow (for me, Law would be willing to do whatever his s/o dreamed of for the wedding). Despite this, I also think they would create their own traditions based on what they see as important. I hope you like it!

*I also decided to name this series of requests about marriage, I love the fact that in the fanfic you can travel with the idea of ​​a super romantic Law. Soon I will be responding to another request received about the honeymoon/what they would do afterwards.

The proposal - the special day (part 2)

Part 1 - Part 3

You considered yourself an anxious person. Are you, or not?

Even though you were tired after helping to clean up the scattered pieces after dinner - Law had been told that it was a tradition in his country to break dishes after dinner to ensure good luck and then for the bride and groom to clean up - sleep didn't seem to reach you. You still didn't understand if the insomnia was the result of being in a different bed, in the Thousand Sunny, if it was the fact that you had eaten almost nothing even with the banquet or if it was because the big day started the next morning.

Dress, makeup, hair, flowers, Law. The last item on your little mental list ran in a loop in your mind. You were sleeping separately that night, but it was impossible for you to close your eyes.

You put on your shoes and threw the sheet over your body, trying to hide your pajamas. Ikkaku, Nami, Robin and Chopper piled into the room. The straw hats were two of the few friends you collected throughout your time at sea and you couldn't help but have them at your wedding and with that, the whole crew came along. Despite some of Law's grumbles - which you knew was just silly jealousy - you invited Kid, after all, you got along very well and of all the trouble you got into, many of them involved him. Unfortunately he couldn't make it, but he sent lots and lots of bottles of sake.

The pier where the Sunny was moored seemed calm and a few meters away was the Polar Tang. A little peek at how Law was doing wouldn't hurt, would it? It only took a few steps before a voice reached you.

"I don't think it's safe for a lady to be walking around here at night." Law's voice scared you, eliciting a small scream from you.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I could ask the same, my little ghost." he pointed to the sheet around you. "I mean, they say it's bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding."

"And you believe that, sweetheart?" You sat on the edge of the dock, knocking on the wood and indicating that he should sit next to you.

"For you, I would believe." he sat up, taking your hand and letting his fingers tangle with yours. "And I have you, no amount of bad luck in the world would take that away from me."

"Can I ask you something?" he immediately nodded to your question. "I know I've always dreamed of this, weddings and parties and that kind of thing. What about you? You're not doing this just to please me, are you?"

"I think it's too late for this question." a shy smile appeared on his lips. "I never expected to meet anyone, have a relationship like the two of us have and then, it happened. From then on, seeing you make your dreams come true is like seeing my own come true."

Instead of using words, you just took his lips to you, small kisses along with "thank you" smiles and "I love you" vows were said. When he moved away from your lips, you saw him take off the coat he was wearing and place it over your shoulders.

"You're freezing but anyway, what were you doing here for yourself?"

"I couldn't sleep, I needed to see you, to know that all this was really happening." You leaned on his shoulder, feeling Law's scent invade your senses. It was discreet, but it was still your favorite scent. "And you?"

"I wanted to spy on my fiancée." He spoke directly, making you smile.

"And your groomsmen let you get away?"

"Shachi and Penguin got drunk before the third bottle and fell asleep. Bepo was even now rereading the speech."

"Poor Bepo, I hope we didn't give him too difficult a mission." you laughed, feeling Law laugh along with you. A rare moment, which usually happened when it was just the two of you. Before you could continue speaking, you heard your voice being called in the distance.

"We broke a thousand plates for nothing to keep the bad things away from the wedding and you two ran away to see each other before the ceremony!" Nami's voice echoed from Sunny. "You can come back here and Law, I think it's good to go back to your place too."

"I'm on my way." you shouted back and accepted the hand that Law extended to you to put you on your feet. Before you could try to return it, Law removed the sheet still hanging from your body and adjusted his coat, so that it covered you almost completely.

"So, see you tomorrow?" He said, rolling the fabric in his hand and handing it to you.

"Yes, oh and of course, I'll be the one in white." You smiled, feeling his lips touch your forehead. "Hey!" you groaned as you watched him walk away without a real goodbye kiss.

"I'll kiss you again when you become Mrs. Trafalgar."

When you returned to Sunny, sleep came much easier than you expected, lulled by the comfort of the fabric around your body.

The day went by much faster than you expected. You spent a few hours in the shower, others getting ready and a few more rambling alone in your thoughts, anxious about what was going to happen.

With the long white dress already adorning your body and everyone already waiting for you, you and Ikkaku began to prepare the last details. For something borrowed, you "borrowed" flowers that stood ready to become medicine in Law's laboratory: chamomile, lavender, fennel, and jasmine flowers. For something old, you wore a small golden clip in your hair, one of the few things you still brought from your home island and the small stones that adorned the piece would serve for something blue.

"I believe everything is ready." You said in a sigh, feeling your hands sweat with nervousness.

"Sure you're not missing something?" Ikkaku asked, in mock distraction. "Something new perhaps?"

"The dress doesn't count? It's the first time I'm officially wearing it." you countered, seeing her deny it through a laugh.

"Close your eyes, please." As soon as you did, you felt Ikkaku put something around your neck. The cold touch of the jewel contrasted with your skin.

When you open your eyes, you can see a thin, golden chain hanging with a pendant with the Heart Pirates' jolly roger made in gold as well.

"The boys and I decided to do this. You can marry the captain, but that doesn't mean you'll stop being our best friend." your eyes immediately flooded with the statement, just as your arms wrapped around her in a strong hug. "Okay, okay, don't cry. Nami will kill us if we ruin her work and of course, the captain must be freaking out about the delay."

"You're not making this an easy task." you dried your tears with the small piece of paper she handed you.

"Good, now is the time." she walked towards the door and opened it wide enough for only her to get through. "Remember, 3 knocks on the door."

You nodded and took a deep breath, it was now or never and the second option would never be available to the two of you. The three knocks on the door felt like an eternity.

The doors to the deck opened and you could see the small space packed with your friends. The decoration was simple, flowers scattered all over the floor and some candles. You could have paid attention to the surprised faces of your fellow sailors, the huge skeleton playing the violin or how Sanji's eyes practically turned into two hearts. You could have paid attention to everything around you, if it weren't for the eyes that you loved so much and that crossed your path.

With each step you took towards the small - and improvised - altar with a huge sunset in the background, it was as if the brightness of the orange sun couldn't compare to the way Law looked at you. You had never seen him like that, so beautiful, so happy. You could bet that some of the emotional looks were more related to surprise at the expression of your soon-to-be husband than at your own entrance.

"Sorry I'm late." you whispered, standing in front of him.

"Worth every second." He took one of your hands, giving it a chaste kiss.

It could be hours, it could be just seconds, you would spend a lifetime under the way Law looked at you that almost night. The first moments of the speech were like distant words echoed amidst a blur of image from your flooded eyes, that was when a sniffle took your attention away.

"I'm sorry." Bepo asked, wiping away a tear and getting a few laughs. "I'm very happy that they chose me for this. Law was my only friend for a long time and of course, the person who brought me to this family. And you…" Bepo turned to you, laughing. "I think that since I convinced him to let you join the pack, we've been chasing too much trouble. I mean, these are two of the most special people in the world to me who have decided to stay together. And before I conclude, I need you to say your vows."

"But the votes…" Law began, being interrupted by the polar bear. By agreement, you would keep the vows just for the two of you.

"Promise that even if you get married, you two will continue to be our friends and our companions at sea. You, my dear captain and you, my dear friend, will not forget the Heart Pirates."

"We promise." you both said in unison and your laughter came out loud when you saw Bepo's cute face practically light up at the answer.

"We would never leave you big guy." you quickly let go of Law to hug him.

"We still have a lot of sea to explore." Law placed a hand on Bepo's shoulder, who broke away from you and hugged him. "Okay, Bepo… Ok, now the focus is different."

"Ah yes, of course…" he adjusted his clothes and waited for you to adjust your dress. "About the trust you two placed in me to celebrate this moment, about the presence of all our friends and of course, the sea that brought us together. I declare you husband and wife."

The "you can kiss the bride" became a distant sound as soon as you felt Law pull you by the waist. His lips captured yours with tenderness and delicacy and yet, his hands said something different, holding you firmly against his body. His lips moved away from yours and placed another chaste kiss on your forehead. Applause and whistles filled the small deck, as well as some tears too - Bepo, Shachi and Penguin were responsible for most of them.

"Now…" you began, gaining everyone's attention. "I invite you all to go to Sunny, where Luffy has kindly proposed a banquet for us to celebrate."

"Finally, food!" you only saw Luffy throw himself from one ship to another, being followed by Sanji who was already desperate with all the embezzlement he would cause at dinner.

"We'll be waiting for you." Nami walked out arm in arm with Robin.

"I think we should all go. The bride and groom deserve some time." Robin suggested.

Little by little, the deck emptied. In the end, there were only you, Law, some petals on the ground and the end of the sunset.

"I…" Law's voice started to say, but soon stopped. You were standing, leaning on the edge of Polar Tang, enjoying the few minutes of sun that remained that day. "I think this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"Don't overdo it, my husband." you said in a provocative tone and a laugh escaped your lips when you saw Law close his eyes and appreciate something that seemed to be invisible to you.

"I don't think I heard you right." your arms circled the back of his head, placing a chaste kiss on the tip of Law's chin.

"My darling, amazing, strong, beautiful husband. I'm happy that you are now officially mine."

"That's where you're wrong, Mrs. Trafalgar. I always have been and always will be yours." He held you in his arms again and contrary to what he had done in the ceremony, he took your lips without any hesitation.

One of his hands, which were firmly attached to your waist, began to cup your face in counterpoint, as if it were the most precious treasure he had found.

"Till death do Us part?"

"Not even that will be able to separate us." He took your lips again and you tangled your fingers in the dark strands of his hair.

"I love your hat, but you look so beautiful like this."

"It doesn't compare to you." He moved away enough so he could spin you around, analyzing every inch of your body. "The most beautiful girl in the entire Grand Line. My beautiful wife."

#reader insert #fiction #no use of y/n #one piece #requests open #trafalgar d law x reader #trafalgar law x reader #law x you #trafalgardwaterlaw #trafalgar law #law x reader

[rederiswrites]

I don't see how trump turning America into a christofacsist state is any different than the norm? like it's been like that for native and black people since it's creation like we inspired the nazis in the first place so like what the point? oh trumps gonna kill everyone who isn't a white cis male! and? that's what america's best quality since day one

Okay I'm actually going to respond to this Edgelord Supreme bullshit, because as absurd as it looks written out like this, I actually do think a lot of people are feeling some half-articulated version of this despair and cynicism. Let's kick that in the ass.

First, let's get one thing straight. History has been terrible awful bad always and forever. There have been a thousand genocides and a million wars and a billion brutal, inhuman war crimes. Back in the days of the earliest civilizations, wiping out entire cities when you defeated them was basically just how things were done for many societies. The fact that we have international laws and international bodies of justice, however obviously toothless they remain, is the result of thousands of years of extremely mixed progress.

So at this point, you pretty much have to say either that a) humans are an incurable blight and don't deserve to live, or b) that we've done amazing, beautiful things and experienced billions of moments of happiness and created art and fallen in love despite all this, so we're still worth working on. Personally, I am very strongly in camp b. I see things worth living for a hundred times a day. There's really no comparison.

Second, the USA is not uniquely bad. It is terribly damaging to people both within its borders and all over the world. It is build on genocide and slavery. Many of its foundational institutions are deeply corrupted by these things. And guess what, that's uh....pretty common. No, really. The US is currently a big fucking problem. It's our turn with the big stick, for sure. But even then, we're not alone.

So how the fuck is this encouraging? It isn't. I'm not encouraging you, I'm telling you to fucking GET GOOD, because when you say shit like the above, what I hear is "Oh I SEE, I'm a TERRIBLE PERSON I guess I should just kill myself to make your life easier." I hear someone who would rather give up and call their country morally bankrupt and irredeemable than to PUT IN SOME FUCKING WORK.

Cynicism is so comfortable. It doesn't ask anything of you. "It's always been like this," it says. "Nothing's going to change."

Except things do change, and things have changed, and your entire premise is in fact absolute dogshit. The two presidential candidates are not remotely the same, and we are not, yet, a Christofascist nation. I could, as many before me already have, enumerate the million concrete ways in which your premise is just not true, but honestly I won't bother, because it's not a premise in good faith. What I mean by that is that even a cursory examination of the actual facts would totally trash your expressed beliefs, so you're not really interested in the facts.

Change for the better can happen. Change for the better has happened. It's just not as EASY as you want it to be. There are more steps. For example, you can't have viable independent candidates until you have campaign finance and voting reform. So you have to push for those things. For years, probably decades. Many people have died without seeing the realization of things they fought for, and yet those things have come to pass. You may die fighting the good fight and not see the victory. I may too. Meanwhile, you make the choices that will hopefully get the fewest people killed.

So stop acting like we're all just too shitty to bother about, and put in some fucking work.

[brienneoftarth1989]

Bad Blood

Lucifer x fem reader

Summary: You’re a demon from Hell who has always tormented the ruler of Hell. You were once close until you betrayed them by helping Dream enter Hell without being detected resulting in the defeat they had with Dream. Since then you both have a love hate relationship.

Warnings: love hate relationship, feeling of abandonment, banishment

Requests open

———————————

You were once close with the Ruler of Hell. There was a time where the two of you were inseparable however the tables have turned since then. You may ask what caused two close beings to end up despising each other? Well let me tell you…

It was a normal day in the depths of hell and you and Lucifer were up to your usual mischief. Well as much as they possibly could considering they had a whole kingdom to rule. The two of you loved to play pranks on one another. Some of them were really simple and some were really complex. The one you love playing the most on Lucifer is saying that you have hidden three things of theirs when in reality you had only hidden two.

Lucifer’s favourite pranks were always replacing certain objects with something else. For example they really enjoyed swapping the salt and the sugar as well as swapping toothpaste for mayonnaise. Harmless but always so annoying and what was even more annoying is they got you everytime. It was so funny yet frustrating.

Well it was until you took it too far. Lucifer was tending to their many duties which meant that you had the afternoon to yourself to do whatever you pleased. You decided to take a stroll around Hell and you ended up taking yourself up to the gates of Hell. You have always enjoyed watching the many new faces enter Hell for the rest of eternity.

Some people look absolutely terrified to be arriving in Hell but some look completely unfazed as if they knew that they would be arriving in Hell. That afternoon you were sitting on one of the nearby rocks watching all these new faces enter Hell. After a short while you heard that gates shut before watching one of the guards leave their post for a short period of time. They must be done for the day.

Just as you were about to leave you heard a loud bang on the door as if someone was trying to get in. Your curiosity got the better of you as you made your way to the gate to see who was there. On the other side of the door you could see Morepheus standing there with a raven. “What are you doing here Dream?” you asked through the iron gates. “I need to speak with Lucifer so please let me in,” he responded.

You had a quick think to yourself. It would be harmless and to find out you let him in later on would be priceless. “Fine Dream. Just don’t cause too much chaos” you laughed knowing that it could happen in Hell. You opened the gate and let him in before closing it behind you. It would be as if no one would ever know. With nothing else happening at the gates of Hell you decided to continue on your walk just letting your legs guide you in any possible direction as you had nowhere in particular you needed to be.

After a while of walking around you finally decided to go back to the palace to see if Lucifer was done with whatever they were doing. As you made your way into the palace you could see everyone inside was acting quite strange compared to what they normally do. Something had obviously happened otherwise no one would be acting like this. You quickly made your way through the palace to find Lucifer.

You entered the throne room to see Lucifer sat on their throne with a permanently annoyed expression plastered on their face. “Are you alright Lucifer? What happened?” You asked them as you made your way closer. “What happened! I will tell you what happened. I was absolutely humiliated” they shouted at you. What could have happened to cause this kind of reaction from the devil themselves.

“What exactly happened Lucifer” you asked them. “Morpheus. That is what happened. Someone let him through the gates of Hell and he just destroyed me in a battle. There was no possible way he could’ve won yet he did. I’ve used all my strength and I still lost” they complained.

You instantly knew that you were in deep trouble. “I tell you what. As soon as I find out who betrayed me will regret even existing” Lucifer stated. You didn’t know what to do. You really wanted to tell them that it was all your fault but you knew deep down that the friendship you had between the two of you would disappear instantly. You did betray them. It wasn’t deliberate but at the end of the day it was the truth.

“Lucifer, I need to tell you something” you told the beast in front of you. “What is it? Please don’t say you had something to do with this” they said with a saddened look on their face. “It was an accident, Lucifer. I never meant for this to happen. I was bored and he was at the gates so I let him in. My intentions were harmless. I thought he had just come to annoy you and that it would be a good prank. I didn’t realise that he had come to battle. I’m so sorry Lucifer. I really meant no bad intentions” you told them trying your best to explain yourself.

You weren’t expecting anything positive to come out of this and you knew deep down you fucked up big time. “Get out! I don’t want to see your face ever again!” Lucifer shouted. You quickly turned around on your feet and made your way out of the throne room as quickly as possible. You felt tears start to fall down your face. You and Lucifer have never had anything like this happen before and you weren’t expecting it to impact you as much as it did.

You expected after a few days that Lucifer would come around. It was space they needed and after a while you were convinced they would come back to you and the two of you would be up to your mischief in no time. But that wasn’t the case. It was actually far from it. The two of you haven’t really spoken since and it has not been well over a year since the incident with Dream.

You do your best to be around Lucifer as you still cared for them but they did everything in their power to put you down again. It is a vicious cycle yet you couldn’t help but keep repeating it. If you had any common sense you would have left this ‘friendship’ when it originally ended but you couldn’t help but keep fighting for it. You knew deep down Lucifer still cared for you and you were still trying your best to prove that to them.

There were many times where you would try and wiggle your way into Lucifer’s life. You even kept up with your pranks expecting that maybe one day they would return to the prank war that you started many years ago. At one point you even believed that you were getting through to them. You would find yourselves having the odd conversations with one another like nothing had ever happened. It was small progress but it was still progress.

You finally believed that the two of you were on the right track and your friendship would be stronger than ever. How wrong were you about to be? Lucifer asked you to come up to the throne room one afternoon and you were hoping to apologise for about the 100th time and you could only hope that this time around they would accept your apology. As you got to the door of the throne room you knocked your secret knock that you only use with Lucifer. “Enter!” you heard Lucifer shout from the otherside of the door.

You quickly made your way into the throne room excited to finally see Lucifer again. “Before you say anything there is something I need to tell you. I have thought long and hard about your many apologies and I have decided that unfortunately I cannot accept your apology. What you did to me was a complete betrayal of trust so I am banishing you to the depth of Hell and you may never return to the palace” they told you with a stern look in their eyes but deep down even you could see the hurt in their eyes.

“Please Lucifer! Don’t do this to me. You know deep down that I never had bad intentions about what happened with Dream. It was a horrible accident and if I knew what the outcome would be then I wouldn’t have let him in. Please Lucifer, I need you in my life. I can’t lose you. I will go insane out there!” you pleaded with them hoping that maybe they would feel bad and change their mind.

“I’m sorry but my mind is set. If I were you I would get moving. Some right horrible creatures come out when it gets dark” they told you before turning around and leaving the throne room entirely. How could they do this to you? After everything the two of you have been through, they just cast you aside as if you are some toy they have got done playing with. You left straight away as you couldn’t bear to be around this place anymore. After you left you realised how much you still missed them.

You knew they still somewhat cared for you as on rare occasions you would receive letters from Lucifer themself asking how you have been. Of course you didn’t respond. You definitely were not going to give them the satisfaction of even letting them know how you were getting on and they have no one else to blame except themself.

#gwendoline christie #gwendolineuniverse #fanfics #lucifer morningstar #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer x y/n #lucifer x reader #lucifer x you #lucifer #lucifer the sandman #the sandman #love hate relationship #banished #abandoned

[defilerwyrm]

I'm a trans man who wants phallo SO bad but the Fear Mongering people do makes me so scared. I have such a fear of surgery anyway and people say phallo is nearly 23hrs long, and it has more risks than heart surgery does, and idk if these are true bc I'm too scared to google it..But I want it so bad, but the stuff I hear scares me. Also people saying it doesn't have any sensation worries me. You said trans men can ask about it so I hope this is ok to do on anon!!! I'd appreciate a non fear filled reply so much thanks!!

23 hours!! Those poor surgeons, can you imagine!

Virtual hugs if you’re the hugging type, Anon, and a cool rock if you’re not.

Those things are definitely not true, not remotely. It’s a long surgery, but when I say it’s long that means it’s about 8 hours all told. It sounds like maybe someone heard it referred to as an “all-day” thing meaning a full WORK day, but instead assumed that that meant a full CALENDAR day. Or, you know, a transphobe made shit up to scare people.

It is most definitely not nearly as risky to your wellbeing as a surgery in which they saw open your sternum and cut open your actual beating heart. There is a fairly high chance of a minor complication that can result in the terrible ordeal of getting pee on your pants sometimes—a urethral fistula—and in most cases, they close up on their own anyway without needing another surgery to correct them. And in this case, “fairly high” means 40%, so it’s still less than half a chance that it’ll happen in the first place. At worst it’s annoying. Serious complications, the type that put you in danger, are extremely rare.

The sensation thing is also false, because they literally harvest a length of nerve from your donor site and hook it up to your existing bits specifically so you WILL have sensation! Sure, it takes a little while for the nerve to heal, but that’s just the reality of ANY surgery.

The nerve grows back in your donor site, too, by the way. While I was typing this up I discovered that one particular spot on my graft is ticklish.

Everyone has their own individual healing factor, but speaking for myself, I had full erotic sensation before the 3-month mark, and the orgasms have been incredible. The head and base are highly sensitive, and everything in between responds pretty damn nicely too, just less of a hit-the-ceiling level of sensitivity. And, you know, if you’ve handled an AMAB person’s penis much at all you’ll know that’s pretty much in keeping with how their dicks work too.

It is an in-patient surgery so if you have it, you’ll be staying in a hospital for a few days so they can keep an eye out for rare disasters. My stay was four or five days of snoring most of the day and periodically getting woken up to eat or answer some simple check-in questions, lift my arm for nurses to move stuff, etc, and then conking back out.

Being cathed sucks, but two weeks of frequent trips to the toilet to drain your bag is honestly nothing compared to a lifetime without (or with vastly reduced) bottom dysphoria. That’s the part that I hated. Everything else was your typical recovery: 10-15 days of sleeping 20 hours a day, then however many weeks of being tired, taking meds, and careful washing, gradually feeling more and more normal until you’re back up to full and ready to get back to business as usual.

Except with this one, you get to learn to pee standing up in the process. :D

(Protip: don’t try a public urinal until you’ve got it down pat at home. Not because of cis men, but because the learning process is messy, lol! The overwhelming majority of cis men in public restrooms want nothing to do with anyone else while they’re in there. The only place anyone’s gonna give your dick more than half a second’s accidental glance is in a gay bar. In 8+ years of using public men’s rooms I have yet to see one (1) penis that wasn’t mine!)

#phalloplasty #ftm #trans men #bottom surgery #trans matters #transphobia. #queerdom #medical transition #replies to things

[olderthannetfic]

/726901861182996480/ a lot of the Richard Siken response is honestly so homophobic, trying to come up with some sinister reason for why a gay man would be interested in writing or reading sexy fanfic about attractive men in a TV show. There was a viral post going around here by some person with a Stranger Things username (not insinuating that fandom is especially weird or anything, just that I remember this person had one of the characters from that show as their username) that suggested he was a creep or groomer or something because he had not responded well to a teenager basically wanting him to do her homework for her, but “he happily writes fanfic of shows for her age demographic” (or something like that) which is both a truly bizarre description of Supernatural, a show that’s always been aimed at adults even if it also has a fair number of teenage fans, but also is really clearly trying to invoke some sort of Groomer Panic in a time when that’s rising as a form of violent homophobia toward LGBTQ+ people especially those who are AMAB. And it’s just such a bizarre statement: even if we were talking about a drama that was aimed at teenagers, in what ways is it “groomer” for an adult to watch this show (lol, on the website that is full of adults freaking out over kids’ shows) or for that adult to find the adult characters played by adult actors attractive enough to write sexy fanfic about them? It’s just really obviously reaching for an excuse to call a gay man a groomer.

In general, I feel like this website has a serious problem (it’s been the case at the very least since the panic over CMBYN, and before anyone gets pissy, I’m not talking about anyone taking issue with the content of the film itself, but the people making weird insinuations about gay/bi men for liking it or “the gay community” for embracing it or over the bi male novel author’s own sexuality or reasons for writing it, etc.) where a lot of people who are not gay/bi men think it’s okay for them to make weird homophobic assertions about it, and generally not bother to question their homophobic beliefs about gay and bi men, because they themselves are some other kind of LGBTQ+. I’m a cis lesbian and a lot of this particular seems to come from cis lesbians and bi women, often trying to couch it in a general sort of skepticism that women as a marginalized group might have toward men as a privileged group, but then it only ever seems to be directed at men who are also marginalized such as gay/bi men (and also MOC) and specifically for things that are a result of those marginalized identities and that don’t affect women — NOT a situation where a man is using his marginalized identity as an excuse for misogyny or anything like that. Anyway, people need to knock that shit off. Not every person in the LGBTQ+ community has the same experience, and being, say, a cis woman who is queer doesn’t necessarily make you any better of an authority on gay or bi men’s lives than cishet people if you aren’t making an effort to talk to them or read stuff by them or learn about their lives, and certainly doesn’t mean you can’t be homophobic toward them — just like how in turn, queer men can be bigoted toward lesbians and/or bi women. I don’t understand how people can be aware of other kinds of intra-LGBTQ+ bigotry — cis gay or bi people being transphobic, gay people being biphobic, etc. — and not be aware that this is also a thing that can happen from other LGBTQ+ people toward gay men.

And being ANY kind of queer absolutely does not give you a get out of jail free card for buying into and disseminating the moral panics about groomers, “kink at pride,” “drag is problematic and always sexual” etc. which are used by the right wing to hurt all of us. This was bad enough in like 2018 as part of the perennial brain worms people on this website have about Pride (that are because way too many of them don’t leave their houses and actually go to a Pride parade) or when people could plausibly believe that “groomer” was purely about shipping discourse and maybe the occasional actually kind of creepy older adult in fandom spaces who spends a little too much time glomming onto teens specifically. But in 2023 you don’t really have any excuse for not being aware of how those terms have broken containment and are now part of regular right-wing propaganda, and particularly a concerted right-wing campaign to try to re-mainstream homophobia in places where it had become socially taboo. Your discomfort around a real adult gay man just enjoying fanfiction, which does not affect you, is not justified and you need to work through that. Using terms like “groomer” for fucking fandom discourse when it’s come to mean what it does in the broader culture is just completely morally reprehensible. Get a fucking grip

--

[occasionallyprosie]

A Thousand Ways

Chapter 11: "Frost Over Charcoal"

Legend learns that he's really bad at saying no when someone is being sincere and genuine, especially when he trusts that someone.

First | <<Previous | Next>>

Febuwhump 2024 | Prompt 8: "Why won't it stop?"

Read On AO3 Warnings: Implied Character Death

----

"What happened in there?" Warriors asked, his voice so uncharacteristically soft that Legend just--He didn't know how to respond.

They had found the black blooded monsters on the road from that town to a larger, merchant village (Mabe Village, Hyrule said that it would survive to his era remarkably. Legend did wonder why that village had been the one to appear on Koholint) that would've had the information they'd need.

From there, a portal took them to the usual places of eras between their times.

They got to a local inn, but it only had two rooms with two beds each. As a result, they split into two groups with Time going with the four youngest heroes if Legend was excluded from the list, though none of them actually knew how old he was except for Wind. Either way, that left--and Legend was certain it was on purpose--Sky, Twilight, Warriors, and Legend in the other room.

Legend inhaled slowly, trying not to break down again. "I cannot emphasize how much I really do not want to talk about it."

He knew it was obvious, especially since he felt their eyes on him when he changed not five minutes ago. It didn't help that his current outfit was short sleeved either, and didn't have the really high collar he used to wear. 

He knew his new scars were obvious, but he also knew that they weren't too familiar with his old ones that they shouldn't be able to tell just how many of the new scars were actually new. All they knew was that not a single stretch of skin on his arms and torso was scarless anymore.

"I know," Warriors promised, and Legend wondered why he was the one taking point in this conversation when both Twilight and Sky were harder to look in the eye and deny anything. Warriors, Legend just had the instinct to deny him everything out of pure spite.

Legend realized how wrong he was when Warriors approached, careful and slow, and guided him to sit. Legend just sort of stared, he didn't want to snap at anyone. He really didn't want to be sharp, driving them off was dangerous now. If he drove them off, who could he look to, who could he hope for see, if he ever got captured again? Besides, those almost three months of being separated put into perspective that yeah, he actually cared about them.

So he couldn't snap, he couldn't drive them away during what little time they'd have together. How could he taint such memories when soon enough those memories would he all he had of them?

Warriors had him sit on the bed beside Twilight. Sky was sitting just opposite them.

"I'll make a deal with you," Warriors said gently, "if you just answer three questions for us, a simple yes or no will suffice, we won't bring it up again unless absolutely necessary."

You see, Legend had teased all three of these heroes for being mother hens, for being fussy and worrywart's, he teased them and called them the group's "big brothers" to Time's group "dad" thing, the others even agreed!

This was just unfair. All three of them ganging up on him and even though he thought Warriors would've been the easiest to shut down, the earnestness and sincerity was almost overwhelming, combined with Twilight leaning into his side, warm and grounding, and Sky just being there and offering an encouraging smile.

He didn't break, but he huffed and had to look away and curl in on himself as some kind of measure of defense.

"Fine," he bit out. "Three questions."

"Are you--Is it okay?" Sky spoke up immediately.

He didn't respond for a long moment, debating lying. Finally he just quietly shook his head and muttered, "No."

Warriors squeezed his hands gently and Twilight's arm wrapped around his shoulder. It made the pressure behind his eyes worse but he really tried to ignore it.

"Those tools on the table--"

"Yes."

Warriors' mouth clicked shut and the soft look was briefly replaced by something blazing and violent. Legend flinched into Twilight just as quickly as that look was snuffed out and replaced by something sad.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Twilight asked.

Legend shook his head, not pulling away from how he had curled into him as a result of Warriors' anger. "No. Just--stay."

"Of course," Sky promised. "You’re stuck with us, vet. I don’t think the Rancher's going to let you go anytime soon anyways."

He snorted, forcing the amusement out more than anything to just please, get rid of this heavy atmosphere. Stop all this worry and claustrophobic caring.

Warriors cracked a small smile. "I guess we know how the bedding situation's going to be."

"Shut up, you’re just jealous I get the kid," Twilight retorted playfully. Legend startled a bit as the second arm wound around him and pulled him into the warm chest behind him, but he knew who it was so he didn't jump too bad.

Warriors huffed. "As if I'd want to share a bed with him, he kicks."

"Like a bunny," Sky commented, a grin on his face that had Legend immediately squawking.

"Not if you cuddle him enough," Twilight chimed in and hugged him closer.

Legend felt his face heat up as he tried to escape. "I will kick you right now--let me go."

"Aww, don't be like that, bunny," Sky teased.

"Don’t call me that!"

Sky cackled and Twilight and Warriors both laughed too. Legend squirmed but couldn't escape Twilight's grip without actually trying.

Eventually he just gave up, and about that time conversation shifted to something far more calm and casual.

The older heroes mostly talked between themselves over Legend's head. And older they were, none of them were secretive about their ages. Sky was the youngest of the three at 23 and was six years post his adventure, Twilight came next at 26 and eight years since his last adventure, then Warriors was 28 and ten years in the aftermath of the war. Legend just relaxed into Twilight and let their voices become a white noise as he played with his magic in his hands until he ended up falling asleep first.

The three older heroes knew what had happened in that cell. Twilight had told them that Legend confirmed it was his torture cell, and they had an idea of what tools had been used, and they knew that he wasn't okay in its aftermath.

Thankfully, as promised, none of them said a thing to the others. As far as the younger heroes and Time knew, Legend just lost his cool and ran off into the woods before he exploded the rest of the building like he did the front door.

After a few more unnamed eras, Legend stepped through the portal and was immediately greeted by the familiar magic of his era.

But when he opened his eyes, his blood went cold.

They were on a path just outside Kakariko, but the late afternoon sky was darkened by smoke rather than the setting of the sun. A huge plume of black and darkness filling the air, he turned too slowly, despite getting whiplash from the action.

The billow came from the wrong direction.

Fire should not be burning that high that way. Ever. That kind of fire was a forest fire, a house fire, it was something damaging and dangerous. That was no campfire.

"No," he breathed.

"Vet? Whe--COLLECTOR WAIT!"

He did not, in fact, wait.

Instead he ran headfirst toward the forest. He ran right where that fire was burning.

Showing up far too late, Legend came up to a large crowd that had already formed. He shoved through, people yelping and beginning to scold him before going silent as they realized who he was.

He reached the front of the crowd and the edge of the property and he stopped.

Oh goddesses, no.

A farmhouse too familiar for his rabbit-fast heart to handle was burning sky high. Deep red and orange marring the oaken walls, staining it black and eating holes through the wood, windows either blocked by flames or burned beyond transparency.

"Link?" Someone called. "Is that--Link, I'm so sorry--"

"Where are they?" He demanded, searching the faces of Kakariko's villagers. "Where--My grandparents, they're not--"

"We hadn't seen them leave, but they may not have been home," one of the ladies--Elizabeth, the wife of the mason-- said.

Legend inhaled sharply. He couldn't lose them--Not them too. Not like this. He couldn't--

He ran toward the burning farmhouse ignoring all the cries for him to wait and stop as if this wasn't his home, as if this wasn't where he grew up and it wasn't where his grandparents may be dying or already be dead at.

He never wanted to return home to this.

The fire had started in the house, it was spreading but the plants were well trimmed and the ground well worn from walking. It did not spread easily to the pasture, but the barn was caught in it. He threw a blast of pure magic at the cucoo coop as he passed it. He saw the pasture empty and hoped to the goddesses that Epona and the cows had ran by now. The fowl were escaping quickly and Legend was about to slam his whole body weight into the burning front door.

Someone grabbed him from behind.

"Vet no! You can't--"

"Let me go!" He fought against their hold.

"It's about to collapse! You'll die!" 

He didn't care. He had to find them. He needed to find them. They were all he had left! They weren't supposed to die like this! They were supposed to grow older, maybe even be there when he finally settled, they were supposed to live to their natural ends! He had to--

The farmhouse that Legend spent half his formative years in collapsed. The burned walls giving in to the weight of the upper floors. It crashed to the ground and whoever grabbed him pulled him close and curled their body around his protectively.

A rush of ash and soot surrounded them, turning the world dark.

The dust settled and the fire still burned, though it was more of a huge bonfire that tried to spread.

Legend shoved Twilight away and grabbed the Ether Medallion.

Winter came early in that moment, an explosion of frost and ice exploding off him and leaving every person untouched but the flames were subdued.

He wanted to collapse, magical precision like that was exhausting, but the muddled voices stopped him. He couldn't break, he couldn't fall and scream and beg the goddesses to just please, let him have someone.

Why did they need to take everyone from him? Why was he doomed to lose them all?

He couldn't. He couldn't break. There were people here and he was still the hero. He had to stay strong, be that damned pillar of strength and courage for the world that was out to break him.

Link?

He turned, looked down, and a little ash covered cucoo was approaching him.

You came back, Piyoko clucked, nudging his leg. I'm glad to see you... I don't know what happened, one moment things were fine then the next the house was burning. Your grandparents had just gone inside for dinner too.

Legend sighed softly. "Gather the others. I'll get you guys to safe farmers."

Piyoko clearly had her own opinion about his response but thankfully didn't push it. She chirped and went toward wherever the other animals had run to. Legend turned to head back to the crowd, his throat trying to close up and his eyes stinging.

It's just the smoke, he told himself.

"Link? Are you..."

"I'll see what animals survived and check on the crops," he told them as calmly as he could, and a few--people who knew him--looked even sadder. "I'd--I would like to see it cleaned, but I don’t have the time do so, though I'd be willing to pay for it to be done. If you’re willing to help out, or willing to take what surviving animals there are, then I'll be here tomorrow morning by dawn."

The heroes looked confused and a bit against that decision, but Legend could care less. Most of the villagers gave him looks of pity, some mixed with concern, others with contempt.

"Everyone should get back home before it gets dark, monsters still roam these parts even if it's rarer than before."

Murmurs seemed to agree with his statements and the townsfolk left, some muttering about how sorry they were for the fates of his grandparents, others promising to be back in the morning. None of them actually referred to them as his grandparents, only calling them by name and telling Legend they were sorry.

Then they were all gone and left the nine heroes in the melting aftermath of the fire.

"Why'd you promise that?" Wild asked with a frown on his face. "We have a job to do, can't the family's next of kin handle this, or maybe the nearest town's mayor--"

"I'm the next of kin."

The following silence was horrible and it further ripped at his chest as he directed his carefully crafted blank look at the champion.

"This was my grandparents farm. Go hunt monsters if you want, I have things to handle right here and that starts with finding the animals that survived while the rubble finishes cooling, that ice is still steaming after all."

This time, nobody stopped him when he turned his back. Twilight and Hyrule both followed him.

Piyoko was on the edge of the survived forest, the fact that none of the surrounding trees were caught in the fire... There were four cucoos, Epona, and a cow. More than Legend expected frankly.

They saw him approach and he knelt down in front of them. Piyoko was quick to press against him and Epona nuzzled his face. Ali, the cow he had won in Labrynna and sent to the farm, drew closer too.

What now, Link?

He let out a steady breath. "Hopefully some of the other farmers around will take you guys in. You guys know as well as I do that I won't be... Rebuilding to stay here."

Epona nudged his head. We know. We'll stay with you, I can keep up.

We'll go, don't worry. It isn't a surprise, Autumn, a russet hen, cooed.

He got a headcount. All the hens intended to go, Piyoko stubbornly insisted on staying with him, and Epona promised she'd follow him too. Ali assured she'd be fine on a new farm.

After that he went and got them all under shelter, he didn't care what the other heroes were doing, he just made sure the shade out by the pasture wasn't about to collapse and then collapsed there with the remaining farm animals.

Twilight and Hyrule had been nearby, but they didn't come too close. Twilight did, eventually, but he just sat beside Legend while Hyrule headed toward the small orange glow over by the nonexistent front gate.

"I'm sorry," Twilight said quietly.

Legend tried desperately to keep himself in check. "It's fine," he managed. "I don't--They're... They were inside when the fire broke out, I-I can't--Why didn't you let me go in?"

There was a chance they were still alive before the building collapsed.

"If you went in, you would've died. It was about to collapse and it did seconds later. If you'd gone inside... I'm sorry about your grandparents."

If he'd gone inside maybe he'd have stopped killing all the people he's cared about.

"Go join the others," he grumbled, wrapping his arms tightly around himself.

"I'm not leaving you alone right now."

"I'm not alone. I have Piyoko, and Epona, Ali, Autumn, Britt, Nettle, and Thorn."

"I'm still staying. I promised to help you and that's what I'll do."

Oh he was unsteady. He had to keep strong, don’t break... He's broken too much this adventure, too many times.

Twilight wound an arm around his shoulders and pulled him into a hug slowly, giving him plenty of time to escape but he went rigid and didn't quite process what was happening until the rancher was holding him to his chest, a hand in his hair and carding through it gently.

Oh.

He buried his face into his chest and sobbed. The dam broke and so did he.

"It's okay, it's going to be okay. We're all here and we'll help you get through this."

"I-I can't--I--" Legend gasped, choking. "I can't keep doing this," he forced out.

"I know--"

"Why doesn't it stop? Why won't it stop?" He begged, he needed to know.

Why did he still hurt? Why did every single person he cared about get hurt? How could he protect them if he's the reason they're hurt?

"Why won't it stop?"

Next>>

#linked universe #febuwhump 2024 #lu legend #linkeduniverse #legend lu #fanfic #lu warriors #lu wild #lu sky #lu twilight #linked universe fanfiction #whump fic #whump #epona #implied character death #house fire #prosie writes #a thousand ways au #fluff to angst

[sophieinwonderland]

Wishing for anti-endos to loose all their friends and spaces and to be ostracized does not help pro-endos. It makes anti-endos even more set in their beliefs. It makes people who are on the fence go "yikes, I guess the anti-endos are right". I'm firmly pro-endo and your recent post makes me want to take some distance. This isn't how we gain allies.

I know, these people suck. I know, it hurts to constantly be excluded and hated for the way our brains work or the reason why they work that way. I know, many anti-endos are too far gone and aren't people that you or I can reason with unless they decide to unpack their shitty beliefs.

But posts threatening them is not the way to go. They already see us as the enemy. We don't need to add fuel to the fire. Let's make sure people who are on the fence or who don't know much about non-traumagenic systems see us acting in ways that make them want to listen to our side instead of the fakeclaimers. Let's make sure anti-endos who are starting to rethink their beliefs feel like it's safe for them to do so and to start listening to pro-endos.

I'm sure this post is gonna get lots of interaction. But if it makes people less likely to read your studies, to listen to your arguments, to hear out the systems messaging you about their experiences? That's all for nothing.

I... actually think adding fuel to a fire can be useful sometimes. As long as you can keep it a controlled burn.

I'm counting on most anti-endos on Tumblr who would be scrolling through the syscourse tag already having me blocked. They won't see my post.

I'm counting on neutrals probably not following my blog or the syscourse tag either one. And most of those that do follow syscourse have already made their minds up about me.

I made that post for a very specific audience. One that doesn't actually need anyone to fuel its fire because they've built an entire community on seeking out systems to mock and attack. They already cherry pick the worst posts they can find to keep their friend group indoctrinated. So adding one more to the pile shouldn't matter to that specific group.

I don't think anything I say is actually going to make them hate the endogenic community more than they already do because they're surrounded constantly by people who will always reinforce that very generalized hate.

But I do think I can direct that hate they already have. Focus it as much as possible on one specific person. Me.

And the more they see me as a threat, (whether or not I am,) the more hateful they respond to me, the more their community will crack.

Users will be more likely to break their rules, making moderation in their subreddit more difficult for the unpaid mod team who will hopefully start rethinking how much of their life they want to dedicate to a hatesub moderating an angry userbase with nothing to show for it.

And while a slim hope, I'm waiting for them to be pushed far enough for Reddit to ban the whole subreddit.

So yeah. I don’t mind tossing as much fuel on the fire as possible if there's a chance their ableist hatesub burns.

Besides... I'm not actually saying anything untrue.

Plurality IS going to become more accepted. They ARE losing the scientific argument. And anti-endos and cringizens WILL lose friends and community support as plural acceptance spreads unless they're willing to change. A safe space for endogenic systems can never be one that houses anti-endos.

This is not a threat. This is a promise. It's a natural result of progress. And I'll do my part to accelerate this. But it's going to happen with or without my involvement.

I'm just making sure that when it does and they go looking for someone to blame because things have gone bad in their lives and their bigotry caught up with them, they'll direct their anger toward me instead of anyone else.

(Although maybe they can direct it inwards too since, you know, it was their fault for being bigots. But I think that would be too much to ask for.)

#syscourse

[vanyzvat]

Anti x Reader

Chapter 1: No Strings Attached (You are here!)

Chapter 2: His Name

Chapter 3: Jacksepticeye

Chapter 4: Chase Brody

Jack STILL exists as a character in this fanfic, even though he is NOT canon anymore. This fanfic follows OLD lore.

Summary: Reader is a YouTuber who has lost everything (How and why is somewhat up for interpretation). As a result, they have lost their sense of fear entirely, and do not seem to care about consequences anymore.

Now, they spend their days making videos "debunking and exposing IRIS", taking advantage of their negative reputation.

They've been affected by ALTR 114209 for quite some time now, but due to their "condition", they seem to be holding up just fine.

After forming a sort of "bond" with ALTR 114209 itself, the supernatural being trusts them enough to get a bit more personal with them.

A lot of things are based off personal headcanons and my own interpretation of these characters! Please keep that in mind. I apologize in advance for any errors! Please let me know if there are any so I can fix them.

You were not meant to be alive today. Not according to whatever IRIS was saying, atleast. Overexposure to the "ALTR 114209" not only put you in danger, but those around you, too.

But you paid it no mind.

After all, you were someone who had already lost everything.

And while that may sound pessimistic to anyone who didn't know you, you didn't see it that way. It was a fact which you had accepted.

A lonely life was what you lived, but it was more fulfilling than being surrounded by people who only held you back.

As of now, you didn't care about your fate.

You lived your life peacefully, content with whatever route it took. If something "bad" happened, you just rolled with it, and in return, nothing seemed to ever bother you.

Worrying about the outcomes, the consequences of your actions, the future... It was all nothing but a headache to you.

That made him curious.

And just like that, you became a target to him.

"Him", who you only called as such due to his appearance.

Clearly, he was no ordinary human. He probably wasn't human at all.

He was able to warp reality itself to his will. To him, this world was nothing more than a game of puppets, and he was the puppet master.

Still, you saw some resemblance- Signs of humanity within him.

But you didn't even know if he had a proper name yet...

He treated you like all the other ones at first. Just another puppet of his, made to entertain him after he broke his last one.

That's what you assumed, anyway.

But you didn't react- Not in the way he wanted you to.

The whispers, the images he flashed in your eyes- They didn't scare you. You had seen them time and time again.

Instead, they only slightly inconvenienced you when you were trying to do your everyday tasks...

To you, he came off as desperate.

To him, you were infuriating.

He seemed willing to go to every length to be satisfied, to finally get the reaction he wanted out of you, and you took it as a personal goal to not give him that.

You were thankful to not have a job that required you to actually leave your home, otherwise, the task of having to constantly explain your "condition" to everyone you come across would get annoying.

You figured that those living near you were most likely affected by ALTR 114209 too, but... You honestly couldn't care less.

You didn't know them, and they didn't know you. It's their problem, not yours. You've stopped feeling remorse over your "selfish decisions" and thinking, and maybe that was why you were truly free.

...The more you talked to him, the closer the two of you seemed to become.

That didn't mean it didn't take any effort, though. It took you many tries to finally get him to even respond to you.

After hearing him whisper unimportant nonsense in your ears and catching glimpses of him at the corner of your eyes for so long, you decided to try to approach him.

And you did, with all the friendliness you had within you, in hopes of getting something in return.

At first, he would stand completely still, unmoving until he faded into obscurity.

After that, he would only eye you up and down, then tilt his head to the side, almost out of intrigue.

And after that, he would violently snap his neck while giving you the widest of smiles.

To you, that just proved his desperation.

Was he really so lonely, that he would do so much for one person? It was kind of... Humiliating.

That reaction from you was definitely not what he was hoping to achieve with that. Weirdly enough, you could even go as far as to say you found his attempts endearing.

Bold of him to assume something wasn't already wrong with you, when nothing he was doing worked. You weren't normal, you were a "weird little freak" as he would put it.

...He had considered giving up on you multiple times. You gave little to no reactions, you almost instantly moved on from anything he threw at you, and you even tried communicating with him.

Who does that?

You were just a waste of his time.

But when he tried to give up on you, he... Found himself unable to. He'd grown attached to you.

And as much as he hated himself for that, he thought of an alternative solution. He gave up on trying to "put his strings on you", but he didn't give up on you entirely.

You had become his "safe space", in a way.

You had given him a place where he could go to whenever he needed to hide, and whenever he felt like being treated like a guest.

A puppet master does need to rest his hands if he wants to control his puppets properly, that was his excuse.

...Back to you.

Today, you were sitting in your work desk, surrounded by your monitors. Your editing program was open on your main screen, with you being busy cutting up some footage for your next upload.

Your channel was a controversial one, and rightfully so. You've made multiple videos on IRIS, and why they are "not to be trusted".

You were a bit biased, considering your one and only friend was the one thing they were trying to get rid of.

It was kind of surprising they hadn't sent people to kidnap you in your sleep yet...

Maybe they did try to, but were unsuccessful, for... Whatever reason.

Maybe it was because you were one of the few people who were smart enough to not install those WTCHR cameras within their homes.

You lifted the coffee mug off your desk and connected it to your lips, taking a long sip.

You were about to set it back down when suddenly, an odd image flashed brightly infront of you.

The image was clearly of an event you had experienced before, only now something was... Off.

Your vision was blurry, and you blinked frantically in an attempt to bring it back to how it was before.

You felt your head grow heavy, a horrible migraine taking over you...

That was all you needed to know that he was here, or just nearby.

You somehow forgot about your awful migraine in almost an instant, and were instead comforted by the thought of getting to talk to him again.

“Where are you?” You asked, trying to maintain yourself and your excitement.

In response, there were the faint sounds of laughter in the distance.

“I̵ am ͝he͝re,” He whispered right in your left ear.

You could feel the temperature of the room declining rapidly due to his presence...

“I͞ ām t̡herê,” He then whispered into your right ear.

You see two hands covering your vision. Despite knowing he was playful, that still managed catch you off-guard.

“I'͜m͝ ͝eve̢ryw͢h̸e̴r͜e͏.” He spoke once more, his voice now from behind you. He moved around so quickly, it was hard to keep up...

“Yes, yes, I know.” You took his hands off your face, and they fell back to his sides.

“You'̨ve bee̕n͜ w̡orking. Working sò, ̷s̛o ha͡rd... W̴h̶y ̴not͟ ̡take a ͜brȩa̕k to s͝pend ͘s̸o͏me ̸time ̨with m̵ę?”

You sighed...

Of course you favoured being with him over doing work, so you pushed your chair back with your legs, and sat up so you could take a look at him.

“And why should I do that?”

“Bec͟aús͝e I͜'͟m ͏t͏he o̴n̴l̀y ͢pe̢rso͜n in you͠r͟ ́l̀i͜fe̷.” He shot at you.

“You're not even a person.” You shot back, and that earned a laugh from him.

...You always found yourself trying to make him laugh, and wondered if he could tell. He most likely could.

“Yo̵ur ͡w̧o̡r̢d̢s ͡c̀ut̶ ̨d͡e̷ep!”

“N͞o͠w- L̛et̶'s̶ go ̢someẁh͜ere̛ ͟more... Com̨for͏tab͠l͜é, yeah?”

Before you could even say anything, you weren't inside your recording room anymore, but in the living room.

You still needed some time to get used to him doing that- Teleporting you around. Even so, you plopped down on your couch, and he sat besides you.

“Oh, I forgot to ask. Do you want anything?”

“No. ͜Ju̴st ̵yo͡u.̷”

“Ah... So, why have you decided to visit?”

He crossed his legs, then placed his hand on top of his knee, which you can see him digging his nails into.

“Í'̸m͢ ̕just̨ ̛a̴ bi̧t... L̕o̕ǹèly.”

“A̛n̷d͞ upsȩt.”

He gritted his teeth through those last few words, making him come off as way more condescending than he was probably intending...

Or maybe he did that on purpose, so he could somehow feel less like prey accepting its fate against a predator.

You couldn't help but roll your damn eyes. It was ridiculous for him to feel like he had to continuously act this way. It was like he was paranoid that eyes were on him at all times, and he would be completely ruined if he let his guard down.

Still- Being so honest was unusual of him, since he never really bothered talking about how he felt. It was always about his accomplishments, his doings, what he had been up to. He was always so proud and full of himself whenever he talked.

“Well, I need a break anyway, like you said. So I'll be available for a bit. What's wrong?”

There was silence.

You shot glances at him, noticing how he breathed slowly, as if he was contemplating something. He seemed stressed.

...And suddenly, you got a nosebleed.

Because of course you did.

You only noticed it had even happened after a drop of blood fell on your shirt.

“Jesus christ-”

As you quickly got up, you noticed the shocked expression on his face. Did he not mean to do that? You made a mental note while making a run for the bathroom.

After you managed to get your nosebleed to stop, you went back to your room to change into a new shirt before going back to him.

He was still waiting for you in the living room, having not moved an inch.

“Hey,”

You spoke, your voice sounding tired. You were tired.

He glanced up at you, then quickly glanced away again. He refused to lift his head to properly look at you. Was he ashamed about what just happened?

“Sòr͞r̴y.͞”

“No, it's okay. I was just a bit... I don't know- Surprised? I thought you gave people nosebleeds and whatnot on purpose.”

He chuckled.

“S͏ome͘t̶i͏me̢s̀.”

You sat down besides him again.

“...Let's try this one more time then.”

You went straight to the point, and his smile faded. He was the one who had told you something was up in the first place, why would he be trying to avoid it now?

“What's wrong?”

You asked, and he answered your question with a question of his own. A question you would've never expected to come from someone like him...

“Ha͟ve͟ ̶you e̕v̧e̡r͘... Be̷e͘n ͡be͟tr͏a̢y̴ed̛?”

#jacksepticegos #jse anti #jse fandom #jacksepticeye egos #jacksepticeye #antisepticeye #antisepticeye x reader #ego x reader #Anti is sympathetic in this #reader is kind of an asshole lol ngl #the LOOOORE!!!

[lololollywrites]

20 questions for fic writers

Thank you for the tag, @discordantwords!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? I have 10 as of now (7 for Sherlock and 3 for Harry Potter, though the HP fics were either begun or completed in 2012 (first posted on ff.net)... in other words, before I knew about JK's raging transphobia. I finally finished a HP WIP in 2020 that I had abandoned years ago, after my resulting disillusionment, because I decided that my work didn't deserve to be in vain. I'm so glad I did!

2. What's your total A03 word count? 168,333

3. What fandoms do you write for? On AO3, just BBC Sherlock and HP, though I have Smallville, Supernatural, and even a Gilmore Girls fic on my ff.net account (the earliest of them written in 2006) that I will NOT be linking here. 😂

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? (Since I've only been posting Sherlock fics on AO3 since September 2021, there's not a ton of variation between these):

The Waning of Withdrawal

Of Sweat, Sociopathy, Scars, and Secrets

Never Been Better

Pressure Points

Genius is a Star Whose Light (is Soon to Sink in Endless Night); I think I may change the title soon since it's so unwieldy)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes! Mainly because I love when authors reply to mine - it acknowledges my gratitude and can open a line of communication. Plus, I just get so excited by every single comment notification that I need to squee and send hearts to the sender.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? None of my Sherlock fics have angsty endings, though that was my original goal for Never Been Better. It originally ended with Chapter 1, but I added two more chapters upon popular demand to fix things. :) It's a classic Sherlock-leaves-John's-wedding-early fic, so I'd intended to explore what may have happened within canon as sort of a missing scene/character exploration. Ultimately, however, I decided to throw a bone to poor Sherlock and disregard canon events.

However, my Harry Potter fic The Burn of the Phoenix, which I migrated to AO3 in 2020 after it's huge reception on ff.net back in 2012 (it's a 13k-word oneshot with 273 reviews and 951 favorites, though I'd definitely not write it the same way today), is definitely angsty. The end is hopeful, but ultimately... I killed Harry Potter. So. 😂 The ending, as it doesn't miraculously entail Harry coming back to life, can certainly be considered angsty as well. The entire fic is from Dudley's perspective as he learns of Harry's death (an alternate version of canon) and attends his funeral.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? As described above, all of my fics have happy endings! Though I'd say the one that's most unabashedly happy with minimal lingering pain and turmoil is Cold Inside. Genius comes close, but Sherlock is horrifically injured even despite happy news that comes in the last chapter so there's still an uphill battle ahead.

8. Do you get hate on fics? No, though I did get a very direct comment on The Waning of Withdrawal - the first time I ever wrote smut - that said the following (the "At all" was particularly harsh):

"I loved the fic and the way you formed everything with the comforting,and the understanding,the guilt and stuff and angst in the main part of the fic but I'm not a huge fan of how much detail went into their love part and stuff.. Not saying it's bad! I'm sure some people absolutely love it but I'm personally not a huge fan of the sex scene. At all."

(Luckily, two other commenters jumped in to my defense!) It seems innocuous enough, but I'd included an A/N that said it was my first time writing a love scene, despite it being brief, so "please go easy on me". The rating and tags were appropriate, too, so it seemed a bit out of the blue. That one little comment knocked my confidence for a while and made it impossible for me to re-read the fic without cringing.

9. Do you write smut? Just two of my Sherlock fics so far are rated E for smut. The Waning of Withdrawal, as described above, and Cold Inside, which has a lengthy sex scene in Chapter 4. It was so much harder than I thought to write - there's nothing quite like meticulously editing writing comprised of graphic depictions of anal sex, haha.

10. Do you write crossovers? No, nor do I usually enjoy them. I really admire the creativity, but tend to prefer fics that are plausible and in-canon; it's just a preference (with exceptions, of course!) That being said, crossovers that could happen between comparable universes - such as Sherlock and Hannibal - really appeal to me in theory.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but I'd be so thrilled!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, nor do I have a beta. I'm sure it could improve my work, but I feel horrifically self conscious during any editing process that involves another person. It's something I need to work on!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship? Sherlock & John and Arthur & Merlin are pretty neck-in-neck. I don't have many Merlin bookmarks, as it was my prior obsession before Sherlock, but I've been delving more into the Merlin fandom lately. Writing for it just seems harder for me - accounting for historical accuracy (though the show isn't historically accurate at all, it's just an entirely different universe) and the bounds of Merlin's magic would be tricky. Maybe one day.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? HAHAHAHAHA so... I did use to write more than one fic at once, waaaay back in the day, but have long since learned my lesson. I refuse to have true WIPs anymore - I only develop one idea at a time - and don't even publish a story until it's complete or almost complete (and fully outlined). Why? Well, there's one WIP I will NEVER finish. It's a Supernatural fic on ff.net with 6 chapters (out of a planned minimum of 10), first published in March of 2007 and last updated in February of 2008. Ooops.

It most recently received a review in 2015, which reads as follows: "WOW! ...update any time soon?...PLEASE...k"

Yeah. So. Never again for me.

16. What are your writing strengths? Based on the comments I receive, I think my strengths are characterization and dialogue. Oddly enough, these are two of my insecurities, but I think that my hyperfixation on both (knowing that I need to consciously work on them) has led to vast improvement.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I often have a difficult time coming up with the initial premise, and am not nearly as creative as many of the writers out there I admire. Ideas usually come without me trying - such as late at night or in the shower - so I jot them down whenever that happens. That's all that seems to work for me. FTH was great in that it took a bit of the burden off and allowed me to elicit prompts from bidders instead.

I also struggle to weave incredibly complex stories. I don't think I'll ever be one of those writers who can write 100k-plus fics full of twists and turns. My plots tend to be more narrow, focused, and immediate.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? As cool as this is - and I may be able to do this with Spanish, as it was my university minor - I wouldn't want dialogue to read as clunky or unnatural to a native speaker or to impede the flow of the prose (I'd want to add translations when possible in parentheses so as not to discourage readers who are not bilingual, unless the dialogue is short and can be translated in an end note).

In Genius, I have excerpts here and there in Serbian, but I ultimately use English to express longer Serbian dialogue (between <brackets> rather than "quotation marks" to indicate the difference in language being spoken and with the acknowledgement that translations are never 1-1. For me, this also helped preserve Sherlock's personality and ensure it could shine through.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Smallville! Way back in 2006. It was terrible; I killed Clark in an alternate version of S5's Hidden. I'm not sure what used to be the appeal of character death to me. You'd never catch me writing it now.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written? It's hard to choose, but I have two answers for different reasons. The fic I'm most proud of writing is Genius. I worked SO, SO hard on the story outline, plot, and the symbolism and clues thrown in throughout. It's my longest and most complex story so far at 51K words, too.

The story I believe to be my best is Never Been Better; specifically, its first chapter. I don't think I've since written a more in-character version of Sherlock or a starker portrayal of his emotions.

I also have a huge soft spot for my Harry Potter fic The Truth at Last, which is the first fic I ever posted to AO3. It marks a huge improvement in my writing from when I first started it in 2012, as I was able to return to it in 2019/20 with a more mature perspective.

I'll tag anyone who hasn't yet been tagged and would like to join! (Sorry for the lack of creativity there - I'm always afraid I'll forget someone).

#20 questions for fic writers #my fics #AO3

[itsclydebitches]

Oh man that was a doozy of an episode. I'll write a proper recap when I get to it, but I want to throw out some initial thoughts while it's fresh.

Warning, copious salt ahead.

The Jaune vs. Ruby fight... honestly, I'm way more Team Jaune here. Look, obviously Ruby is going through a very difficult time right now but 1. Jaune is not privy to most of that (he doesn't get to see her awful flashbacks like the audience does) and 2. He's been going through a "very difficult time" for several decades. He literally just watched a whole village of friends DIE because he helped defend Ruby against Neo's attack, right on the heels of her and the others completely dismissing that relationship. I literally don't care who's right about the tree, I care that our huntress heroes balked at the idea of spending even one day protecting defenseless civilians that were clearly very important to their friend WHILE he did all the dangerous work of looking for a way out for them all (the best of both worlds!). Then they had the gall to smile at him after he watched them perish and go, "They're not dead. It's what they wanted :)" They don't know that! Yang literally admitted just moments ago that they do not know what happens at the tree, but now they're 100% sure that the paper people have resurrected into a better state because that's a nice, simple narrative. Even if they were sure of what happens, that's still a terribly difficult loss to deal with. As they saw with the Prince, people can come back from the tree COMPLETELY different, with little of their original personalities intact. If that's not a kind of death I don't know what is.

I hate that Yang responds with, "Hate that!" when they learn that Jaune did them the honor of keeping them close, bestowing all their names onto his new family. I hate that they can't put themselves in his shoes for longer than a few seconds and jump straight to him being "crazy." I hate that they're lost and aimless in this world, Jaune has spent a lifetime mapping its secrets, and yet they decide that they can't count on him. Why? Because he failed to have an easy answer ready when they needed it and has failed to hide that - surprise - things have been difficult for the lifetime he's been fighting alone. As he himself says: how dare I fail to solve all our problems.

Toss in the fact that we've had eight Volumes of Ruby demanding leadership at every turn, displaying full confidence in front of Jaune and reassuring him that yes, she knows what she's doing. I have soooo many problems with how Jaune is written, but my god, looking at things from a purely in-world perspective, he has EVERY right to be pissed as hell at her. Ruby promised she knew what she was doing. Jaune defended her decisions to Ren. He was put into a position where (according to RWBY's "logic") he had to kill a friend. Then he's dropped into a horrific alternate reality - a result of Ruby's failed plan - and yet spends his life waiting for her return. He devotes himself to her: looking for her, trying to find a way out for her, keeping her weapon safe for her, naming a new friend after her, and yes, protecting people like she helped teach him to. Obviously the others are all a part of that too, but at its core Jaune has spent decades following Ruby's leadership, despite how badly it failed him.

And then what? After all those YEARS what does he see when they finally reunite? A Ruby who is ungrateful to have her weapon back, is dismissive of his life here, stands uselessly while the others fight the battle for her (again, Jaune can't see inside Ruby's head), and then when defending her results in the DEATH of his village? How does she respond?

"What about me?"

Ohhhh my god, girl!! Yeah, yeah, no one gets to plan their breakdown, but I was still seriously side-eyeing her "Is this a bad time for you?" Yes, Ruby, it is a bit of a bad time because a village of people just died and you're only concerned with how hard your own life is. Read the room a little? Jaune's "It's all about you!" was so satisfying, though his immediate apology afterwards was not. Honestly, let Ruby sit with this, please. As I've said this whole Volume, she'd have a leg to stand on if she'd actually been forced into this war: if Ozpin had manipulated her into joining Beacon, if fighting had been a necessity due to her silver eyes, if the adults around her hadn't said at every single turn: 'Stop wresting control you're not ready for and let us carry the load.' But she didn't. It's all about Ruby because Ruby MADE IT all about her, so no... to my mind she doesn't get to turn around and start complaining that others expect something of her. Especially when the expectations are so low like Jaune's, 'Can you maybe consider that I've been through hell for several decades, respect the life I've built here, and be grateful for what someone is offering you rather than complaining that things aren't perfect right off the bat?'

This episode was so weird for me because on the one hand it gave me a LOT that I've been looking for, but on the other hand it highlighted how much I've come to dislike the four main girls. Why are they disgusted with Jaune bestowing their names on new friends? Why do they dismiss him despite everything he's accomplished? Why does Yang plant herself in front of Blake when her baby sister is being mildly critical of her? (Plus, I'm really not a fan of this droopy-eared, people pleaser Blake. Bring back the fierce, opinionated fighter she used to be.) At least we're staying consistent with the group turning on each other and assuming they'll be attacked at the slightest provocation (yay Volume 6 callback). I made a note in my last recap that I loved the girls enjoying the chess battle together and that's largely because most of the time they don't act like friends, let alone family. WBY have been nothing but critical and dismissive of Ruby since they landed here. None of them have any real sympathy to offer Jaune. As much as I disagree with her overall stance in the face of what's happened, Ruby's "We're so happy for you" to Blake/Yang and her "Shut up" when Blake tries another stupid platitude were great. Thanks, sis, for only paying attention to your girlfriend lately and no thanks, Blake, you already kept me from trying to come up with a practical solution once this Volume. Another, "Things are bad, but..." isn't going to cut it anymore. They ALL treat each other so badly nowadays and I'm shocked whenever we get a group hug that supposedly conveys how much they truly love one another. Can't you all just be nice with more frequency? More of that wholesome support seen in the chess fight over the stupid gags, please.

(Actually, that's a big compliment I just thought of: the episode didn't interrupt the intensity of that fight with another joke. Great job.)

Of course, we're already seeing the seeds of the quick forgiveness: Jaune's immediate apology, Blake trying to be optimistic, all of them staring in concern as Ruby flies away. It looks like the writers have a general sense of the show's criticism, but not why that criticism exists. Yes, Ruby has gone through a lot and she has plenty of reasons to be frustrated and disappointed with her team, but Jaune is still right. I don't think the show is ever going to get that. Ruby has been positioned as the victim this entire Volume, the poor soul "forced" to shoulder this responsibility, everyone offer her comfort and sympathy with no acknowledgement of how this all came about... and having one (1) character say, 'No. You fucked up' doesn't change that underlying narrative. Jaune is just the new Ren, allowed to briefly pull back the curtain on Ruby's leadership, only to almost immediately pull it back. If anything, the fact that Ruby is upset at being leader just offers another layer of protection.

Ruby: I want to make the decisions!

Someone: We don't think that's a good idea, but it's kinda hard to stop you... Wait. Your decisions are bad.

Ruby: Excuse me? Don't you know how hard making decisions is? How can you criticize me when you don't know what it's like? I'm the victim here!

Ruby as a character is pretty impervious to real criticism now because everything she's ever done falls under the header of "The Leader." Once you position her as the victim of unwanted leadership (which again, she's not) it automatically absolves her of true responsibility. She never would have made bad decisions if she hadn't been forced to make all the decisions in the first place, ergo you're the problem for dragging this poor girl who was only trying to make the best of a terrible situation! Meanwhile I'm just

[gestures to Ruby eagerly agreeing to go to Beacon early]

[gestures to her arc where she rose to the challenge of being team leader]

[gestures to the fact that leadership/teams were kinda dissolved outside of Beacon and people only kept looking to Ruby because she demanded to be heard]

[gestures to her hunting down Cinder against Qrow's advice]

[gestures to "This is my fight too!"]

[gestures to her insisting on Jaune's stolen airship plan against Qrow's advice (again)]

[gestures to "We never needed adults to solve our problems!"] [gestures to her solely making the decision to lie to Ironwood and ignoring her teammate's disagreements]

[gestures to her being the face of hope for all of Remnant]

[gestures to her awful plan that made Penny human, forgot Cinder, and deliberately destroyed a Kingdom]

[gestures to the fact that Jaune is ALSO a team leader and ALSO has a personal grudge against the baddies and has ALSO spent longer than twice Ruby's lifetime playing the part of a literal #Hero trying desperately to keep people safe, only for her to show up, endanger his new family, not fight, and then the rest of her team tries to platitude their way through a 'It's not that bad' response to their deaths]

Man, if I were John I would have had a LOT more to say to this girl and her "What about me?" attitude alfkjasflajfds

#rwde #rwby #mymetas #okay this is a rant not a meta XD

[maslows-pyramid-scheme]

Sorry to be a coward and not post this on the post myself, but every time I respond to menalez her cronies start spamming my inbox calling me all sorts of pornographic things and making jokes about my sexual assault.

What's her beef with you saying "All women are discriminated against on the basis of sex and sexuality"? It's correct. In many parts of the world the leading cause of familial femicide is the suspicion, real or unreal, of a woman having heterosexual sex. In many places it's pregnancy or at least happens to pregnant women. Radfems of all orientations point this out all the time. These are most often the direct result of sex (misogyny) but obviously the sexuality of the women is not irrelevant. Men hate women's sexual behavior. There is a reason whore, slut, bitch, and other terms that degrade women on the basis of sexuality are the most common misogynistic insults. Domestic violence is another example.

"All women suffer discrimination (material disadvantage + abuse), even if they are OSA" does not mean that lesbians don't suffer their own specialized form of discrimination, scrutinty, and some intensified forms of misogyny. This does not diminish the horrible things lesbian have to go through, and that society has no place for them. This does not means hetero women are do not have the privilege of avoiding lesbophobia. Of course hetero women can avoid lesbophobia. But that does not mean they are "net" privileged with no necessary caveats.

And if their stance is that het and bi women gain material advantage by not partnering with men or being around men (which agree with), how is it offensive to say that het and bi women suffer material disadvantage for partnering with men or being around men? It's literally alluding to the same thing! Am I crazy? If just saying this gets them so bad, I don't think they know if they agree with themselves then. It seems to change depending on how and when they want to dismiss all problems bi women face, or at the very least they only want it put in very specific language rather than being viewed from all angles.

I'm sorry to hear that her friends have treated you so poorly; it's not, and it never will be, appropriate or feminist to call people by pornographic terms or to mock their sexual assault. You're welcome to DM/anon message me and vent if you ever need support <3

I agree with your assessment, and I see how heterosexual women are targeted for their sex and their sexuality in my volunteer work all the time.

First example -

An abusive husband sexually abuses his heterosexual wife (sex discrimination). As part of the abuse, he forces her to have sex with other women (sexuality discrimination), records it (sex + sexuality discrimination), and threatens to send the footage to friends and family if she ever leaves him (sex + sexuality discrimination). He knows that her friends and family will ostracise her if he spreads the footage (sex + sexuality discrimination).

Second example -

A heterosexual young woman lives in a conservative society and rejects a young man's romantic advances. In retaliation, he lies and tells people that they had sex (sex discrimination) and she is shunned in her community for being 'impure' as a consequence (sexuality discrimination). There is nothing she can do to fix her reputation or protect herself from further abuse.

Final example -

A heterosexual woman is sex trafficked to another country and forced to work in an illegal brothel (sex discrimination - but I think you could argue sexuality discrimination too). She wants to leave, but she's worried that she'll be returned to her country of origin and that people will shun her (sexuality discrimination).

I could go on for days... these lived experiences aren't just a form of sex discrimination, they're a form of sex discrimination specifically reliant on abuses of a woman's sexuality.

But I have no idea what her problem is; I know that it's easy to conflate sex discrimination with sexuality discrimination, but she seems determined to take things a step further and claim that I think lesbians oppress heterosexual women or something. It's not just a misunderstanding, it's a bad faith, dishonest way of reading my comment (and it's a perfect example of why I think the axis of oppression is brain rotting).

#you're not crazy; this is just really stupid and dishonest discourse #i think menalez should reread the dictionary definitions of 'sexuality' and 'sexual orientation' #anon

[theclearblue]

Is it bad that I feel personally victimised by WCI or am I just being dramatic?

I don't think so anon, I think the themes of family in WCI are some of the most personal and nuanced Oda has ever done and while tragic in so many ways, I think results in the best way of conveying how powerful found family is but also how someone can have complicated feelings towards their blood family.

Throughout all of One Piece, you can see this through line of found family and how blood relations isn't what matters in who you consider family (The ASL brothers, Bellemere and Nojiko for Nami, Kuina for Zoro, Zeff for Sanji, Saul for Robin, Tom and Iceburg for Franky, and while not a strawhat, Corazon and Law deeply affected me as well). This is obviously a trope Oda has liked writing for a long time and one he does well, but (with somewhat the exception of Marineford/Post-War arc with Whitebeard and Ace), WCI is the first time he really dives into these themes of what family is, and what I really appreciated, how messy it can be.

(I uhhh wrote a lot after the cut so be prepared for that)

And it's not just Sanji in this arc (I'll get to him though don't worry), from Germa, from the Big Mom Pirates, and the Firetank Pirates, so many characters are acting as narrative foils to Sanji and dealing with family related trauma, and responding to it differently. The ones that really got me were Pudding and Katakuri though, and they're pretty similar to each other as well. I've talked a little bit about Pudding already here so I'll talk a bit more about Katakuri instead, but it hit me really hard when he made a temple for himself, and he lets the rumors fly about "his back has never touched the ground, he's praying to a god of war, no one has seen him eat" and it's just. Him laying on his back, eating donuts happily. And the scene is kind of silly and funny right, but I kid you not my New Year's resolution this year was to just, try to be more comfortable in my living room/kitchen without thinking everyone is going to judge me for, what? Eating? Watching a show I like? Completely normal things, but if you've ever grown up in a house where just, EVERYTHING you do is picked apart and criticized by family, it's easier to just shut yourself away in a room and hide it. And isn't that tragic? Katakuri projecting this image of strength that his family asks of him so much that he feels he has to hide completely normal things like lying down and eating? I could go even deeper into this character but this is just one example of a character's complicated relationship with his family, where he hides so much of himself for them, but also it stemming from a place of love after what happened to Brulee when they were kids.

And now to talk about Sanji. Ohhhh where do I even start with this guy. As kind of a sidenote, if you've seen any of my posts from Thriller Bark through Punk Hazard, I was really struggling to like Sanji as a character and I didn't make that a secret. Which was upsetting to me because, from Baratie-Enies Lobby (and really good moments at the end of Thriller Bark and Saoboady) he was a favorite of mine! And at times I thought his character was done pretty dirty where he was stripped down to a singular gag and Oda leaned into it way way way too hard. But it's immensely satisfying to me to see all the little seeds Oda planted for so many years come to fruition in Zou and WCI, to the point I think he's turned from being the most one note strawhat to the most nuanced and layered in the span of a singular saga. And that was incredible to see.

I think what really captivated me about Sanji from the beginning were how strong and rigid his convictions are, and that even though he's kind of a rude brat (I say that with love lol), he's so undeniably kind, even to a fault. And with his first backstory we see how a lot of his rigid rules he's made for himself come from, it's from Zeff. He doesn't hit women, he'll feed anyone who's hungry no matter what, and he learns to fight to protect people he cares about, but he isn't really a fighter in the same way Luffy and Zoro are, and that's made clear in his desire to protect his hands in a fight so that he can do what he really loves, and that's to cook. A lot of what makes Sanji who he is today is shown here, but Oda was smart in showing aspects of Sanji that clearly don't stem from Zeff without telling the audience why for the longest time.

He shares the dream of the All Blue with Zeff, but where did it come from? Zeff is kind of similar where he has this hard exterior but underneath is kind as well, but it's taken to another level with Sanji where it becomes self sacrificial. Throwing himself down the mountain on Drum Island, taking the lightning bolts from Enel for Nami and Usopp on Skypeia, boarding the water train alone to try and get to Robin, and most prominently, at least for me, him trying to take Luffy's pain at the end of Thriller Bark instead of Zoro, where he very clearly places more value on Zoro's dream and life than his own. That was the moment to me that made me really realize he does not see value in himself, unless he's providing something he deems useful. And if the situation calls for it, he'll throw his life and dream away if that makes him "useful" not realizing that the crew don't see him as this dispensable thing like he sees himself.

And all of Sanji's strengths and flaws as a character just come to make this perfect storm and mess that is Whole Cake Island. And the kindness that is Sanji's most definitive trait is so clearly not in this family, at least not seen at first. His brothers are made to have no zero empathy and beat down on him constantly, verbally and physically, and Judge just watches and doesn't care, eventually just hides Sanji in a cell and pretends he's dead. Because he was physically weaker and human. And yet he continues to cook because he loves doing it, he remembers his mother's kindness, and his dream of the all blue is formed in a small dark room and just. This got to me big time. Not to get too personal but the set of expectations put onto Sanji by his family, ones he can never live up to and finding passion in something his family finds to be worthless and a waste of time. Finding an escape in books and finding his dream there even though everything around him is hell. Slowly realizing the extent of cruelty that his father will go to as he grows up. Very unfortunately for me this might be the most relatable character I have ever come across in regards to my own experiences. I'm someone to voice my thoughts on things even if nobody else cares (hence why I've been liveblogging on here since Drum Island I think lmao) but while watching Sanji's backstory it affected me like nothing else ever has. It's not even something that made me cry really, I was just in shock after watching it for awhile. And Reiju saying to Sanji, "There are people out there who will accept you for who you are, you need to get out of here" which is so similar to what Saul said to Robin and even similar to what one of my sisters said to me growing up. Yeah. I also felt personally victimized by Whole Cake Island lmao.

But the end result of Sanji's arc is so beautiful and amazing. Sanji putting on this act of looking down on Luffy, and once again trying to sacrifice himself to protect those that he cares about, but Luffy just cuts through the bullshit because he knows that isn't really Sanji talking in that fight. Luffy's speech as Sanji is being driven away where he says that he can't become the pirate king without him by his side. This isn't an original thought but Sanji and Zoro both kind of represent different aspects of Luffy's dreams. Zoro with a seemingly impossible ideal and putting 100% of yourself into it. "I will become the greatest swordsman." "I will become the pirate king." But Sanji's dream of finding the All Blue reflects Luffy's dream of finding the One Piece. They both don't know if either of those things are even real (the audience at this point knows the one piece is real, but to my knowledge and where I'm at, Luffy doesn't). Yet there's this childlike wonder they both have about these dreams, because, what if it is real? Luffy knows that Sanji is irreplaceable because of the ideals that they share, not because of what Sanji can provide or be "useful" as.

It takes so much for Sanji to go running back to Luffy, and even when he does, he obviously gets insecure again and starts listing off reasons why he isn't worthy enough to go back to the Sunny and to the crew. And God is it satisfying to see Luffy absolutely rock his shit for saying that and asking him to just SAY what he really wants. And Sanji breaking down and saying how much he misses the Sunny and the crew and also airing out how he feels backed into a corner and doesn't know the way out, that he wants to help his family even though he doesn't consider them family and he KNOWS it doesn't make sense, he is being kind to a fault again. But Luffy smiling at him and saying "Well, that's just how you are. Let's go crash the wedding." That's when I started sobbing lmao, because there is such unconditional love and kindness in that statement that Sanji has so desperately needed ever since his mother died. Someone who just accepts him and all his faults wholeheartedly, and is that not the most beautiful representation of family??? His relationship with his blood family is so messy and complicated and full of mixed feelings(and that's very common), but his feelings about Zeff and Luffy and the rest of the strawhats are so clearly full of adoration and unconditional love for them, and they feel that same love for him as well! How lucky all of them are where they found their people, and how everyone else in this world has that opportunity to find the space and people they truly belong to, not tied down by blood. Whole Cake Island's themes on family were so well done and also fundamentally changed me as a person I think.

#umm. this got uhhh long #sorry wci has just been bouncing around in my brain and this was the perfect outlet lmao #and i could say even more! so many layers to sanji and reiju and pudding and katakuri and chiffon/lola #and so many more #could talk about the strawhats during this arc too #GOD i'm insane about one piece. they make me go insane i love this STUPID manga about STUPID rubber boy so god damn much #whole cake island #wci #one piece meta #one piece #sanji

[missr3n3]

Ctda is so fun I love it.. is there any details/ hcs you have about the characters you wanna share?

sorry for taking so long to respond, but you've activated my trap card and i needed to be at my computer so i could write this essay of a response lol

im gonna do one for each character:

jonah: though he used be be more into psychedelics as a teenager, ever since the events of vol. 2 and cdta he's entirely stopped using them. there's just to much fuel for a potential bad trip. he's also stopped drinking (though he was never did it that often in the first place) and doesn't smoke weed as often bc sarah and evelin don't want him stinking up their apartment.

adam: his black hoodie (not the BPS one) has become a comfort item for him. because he didn't have it on while he was in the Nightmare Sand Pit and was at his most vulnerable, he associates not wearing it with being in danger. since he's wearing it basically all the time though, it's gotten really worse for wear and has quite a few holes in it, which jonah helpfully fixed with various patches (you'll see them when i drop the 2011 cdta designs lol)

thatcher: since he's now a certified Old Ass Man (in his early 50s), he's fully stopped trying to look profession or trendy and has gone back to his old grunge fashion sense from the 90s. luckily, most people think this is cool af, and in particular it entertains some of the kids that ride his bus route bc they think he's an old Kurt Cobain lol

evelin: i kind of alluded to this in clear the stone chapter 3, but she and jonah didn't get along at first because she's very straight edge and he's very not. since their re-introduction in clear the stone and the events of cdta, she's a bit more understanding of his drug use (though still not entirely comfortable with it). nowadays she considers jonah to be just as close a friend to her as sarah <3

sarah: mandela getting blown tf up has actually significantly helped her with regards to moving on from her brother's death. though she can't quite put her finger on why, she as a general sense that his soul is at peace now. as a result, she intends to rebrand BPS from a paranormal investigation group to more of a horror webseries thing. she even renames the youtube channel to the bythorne paranormal show!

alt!gabriel: as far as the cdta timeline goes, he created the alternates for the sole purpose of furthering his takeover plan. alternates in this story are straight-up demons as a result, and this might come into play in an interesting way in the sequel... 👀

six: so i've mentioned before that he's an entirely separate alien in the cdta timeline that started working with alt!gabriel as a means to an end since they have similar goals (also dropped in dms that this happened in the 1920s). the reason for this is that his species feeds on pain, and alternates are really good at causing a lot of mental and sometimes physical pain. though with the alternates gone and type 6s doing a shit job at killing humans, his kind are now looking into other avenues for a food supply :)

sam: if he were voiced, i imagine he'd sound like steven as he sounds in steven universe future. pretty nerdy but with a little bit of rasp to it and a hint of theater kid lol. also! he's 6'4 and is the tallest human in cdta!

delilah: before her reversion (official temporal phenomena term for the changes type 6s went through), her alternate instincts would mainly come out in her being an obnoxious know-it-all. the type to "well AKSHUALLY 🤓" everyone around her over the slightest inaccuracies. also never admitting when she was wrong and assuming the people calling her out were just too stupid to understand her genius. basically what i'm saying is she would've love rick and morty before the reversion lol

and as a special bonus:

joel: he actually started mystifying oracle to try and prove that the paranormal didn't exist, but when he realized how many views he was getting from believers, he pivoted to over-the-top shows of the effects of the ouija board. of course it also helps that he has an actual demon in his house lol.

chloe: she met joel in college! they're both studying film, and thus shared a lot of the same classes together. joel ended up dropping out once youtube started making money for him, but they'll still meet up from time to time, especially if there's a new horror movie they want to see!

#ask the skeleton #cut down the altar au #told you it was gonna b an essay lol #also couldn't say much about the demon in joel's house due to spoilers. but there's gonna b some fun stuff happening there too :)

[astriiformes]

Poking and prodding at my brain now that I have another potential dose of context for why it melts down and spirals over things so often and like. Putting everything in a list there really is a pattern I should have been paying more attention to probably, but have always just identified as bad anxiety or neurodivergent quirks

That said, it is also making me feel immensely lonely because I have lots of neurodivergent and anxious friends I've gone to for advice over the years, but I'm realizing that my possible pure-obsessive OCD and scrupulosity tendencies may be why I've often responded poorly to their attempts at help. Which is good to understand, and ultimately may help me tell them what I do need but. Also means I am suddenly hyper aware of how irrational the stuff I can't help but meltdown over is, and feel really stupid for it and also like the people I'm closest to aren't going to have much advice for me.

Anyways. For my own connecting-the-dots purposes. Some very normal thoughts I have had breakdowns over before:

As a kid who was raised Evangelical, had a pretty classic case of the religious/blasphemous intrusive thoughts often associated with OCD that caused me an immense amount of distress. This one has calmed down entirely now that I have extricated myself from that environment, but also for a couple years after leaving the church I would have similar thought spirals literally any time someone mentioned the concept of the afterlife/hell.

Adjacently, the second part contributed to me having a fear of death so intense for a while that I once broke down crying in my mom's car during the 7-minute drive from my dad's place to hers on a night where there were no other cars on the road because I was so convinced we were going to die in a car crash.

Unfortunate fact: I was trying to get into Discworld at the time and read Mort while all this was going on and my opinion of the series has never quite recovered.

.......Have multiple friends very into Discworld and used to spiral any time it got mentioned because it felt like a moral flaw that it stressed me out so much because I shouldn't feel that way about something to important to my friends, and additionally felt like it would be, essentially, thoughtcrime to blacklist it.

(This is better now and I am probably going to give the books another try, but for a while I was very stupid about it)

Spent actual years searching for a place to buy gatorade powder that wasn't Walmart or Amazon even though I need it for actual health reasons, because they were the only places I could find it and I have an obsessive avoidance of both companies and couldn't bear the thought of buying from them for the first time in years. Over something I needed. For my health.

Opposite of the Discworld problem: some of my friends have problems with a TV show I like which means I have spent entire evenings crying myself to sleep with guilt because obviously I cannot like things that the people in my life are bothered by

I am not joking I missed class regularly as a result of the last one for several weeks, I was so distraught.

And like I also have dealt with a lot of other things over the years, including really upsetting intrusive thoughts (usually of the "what if something violent and gory happened to you and/or your loved ones," variety, with a side of self-harming and suicidal thoughts -- being a really visual thinker makes this particularly terrible) and constant spiraling over perceived social/moral missteps.

And I guess I'm feeling kind of frustrated because so many people have latched onto the more... hm... relatable I guess aspects of my anxiety in ways that have made me think the above are like. Normal for someone with really bad anxiety (and trauma too, I guess, though I think that really is the source of some of them) and I've fallen into beating myself up over not being able to overcome mine the way everybody else seems to. And now I still don't even entirely feel like I'm allowed to self-diagnose any of this as OCD specifically but I'm also realizing that there is something much more fucked up and irrational happening in my brain than I thought because I just assumed this was how mental illness was for everyone and I was just. Really bad at managing it.

#maybe there is. maybe there is something going on here

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Puppy!

Puppy

Tenzo sat on the floor cross-legged working on the report for his last mission. There wasn't a lot for him to say about the job, yet he found this particular report more stressful than any other he'd done in his life.

Perhaps it was because this was a report destined for Danzo's hands. He'd known of the elder's hand in choosing him for the mission, and there hadn't been a single doubt in his mind that his old mentor had certain expectations.

Whether he met those expectations or not, Tenzo didn't know. He hadn't thought about it too much while he was doing the mission, but now it was all his brain would focus on.

Would Danzo be happy with the missions results? Had he done the job well enough?

As the thoughts pilled up in his mind, Tenzo felt a great weight pushing down on his shoulders. A familiar weight that he'd managed to escape for the last year.

A feeling he'd hoped he'd never have to experience again.

"Here," Kakashi's voice cut through the overwhelming thoughts. "To help you calm down."

Before Tenzo had an opportunity to look up at his Senpai and ask what he was talking about, something was dropped into his lap. A fluffy, sort of stinky something that immediately started wiggling around.

"What the!?" He threw his mission report into the air in a panic. "Senpai what is that!?"

Kakashi plopped down across from him and stared at him as though he'd grown a second head. "that?" he pointed at the thing in Tenzo's lap. "Is Pakkun, and he's very nice. He might even let you touch his toe beans if you ask."

"T-toe beans?" Tenzo blinked. None of what his friend had just said to him made any sense. "I don't- ahhh!"

Screaming wasn't something Tenzo did often. His emotions were usually kept in check, though over the years he'd found a certain weak spot that seemed to bring out those emotions without warning.

That weak spot's name was, of course, Hatake Kakashi.

"You said he was a chill one," the thing, Pakkun huffed as it finally settled into his lap and glanced back at him with a tired look. An expression that immediately reminded Tenzo of his Senpai. "He's almost as bad as Gai."

"He's usually pretty chill," Kakashi chuckled. "I think maybe next time I should warn him."

"You think?" Tenzo grumbled, cringing when he processed the rest of Kakashi's sentence. "Wait, what do you mean 'next time'?"

"well," scratching his chin, Kakashi chuckled again. "There are eight of them in total, and while Pakkun is the one I summon the most-"

"So, your favorite?"

His Senpai's eyes widened with panic. "That's not true!" he glanced down at Pakkun. "Don't listen to him. that's not true at all."

Pakkun didn't respond, but Tenzo could see the moment he rolled his eyes. "I'm Pakkun," he lifted a paw towards Tenzo. "A blood hound."

Tenzo stared back at the tiny animal. "A...blood hound?"

"A dog," Kakashi clarified for him. "A specific type of dog that tracks for me. There's no better trackers than them."

A dog.

Realization struck Tenzo suddenly. He'd read about all sorts of animals, but he'd never had much of an opportunity to spend time with them. There were too many mission's to do, and Danzo hated when he wasted time petting animals when he should be training or completing missions.

"Puppy," he whispered the word he'd heard his Senpai say on more than one occasion when they happened to be passing by a stray dog or one of the Inuzuka clan dogs. "He's....he's a puppy?"

Pakkun rolled his eyes while Kakashi chuckled.

"A puppy," Kakashi confirmed, earning himself a stern glare from Pakkun. "That's the best way to describe him, yes."

"I am not-" Tenzo dropped a hand on top of Pakkun's head, just as he'd seen his Senpai do hundreds of times before. He'd never gone up to any of the other dogs before. Too afraid that they might try to bite him, or that they might hate him.

This was Kakashi's dog, though.

A dog that he felt he could trust with his life, if only because he was connected to the one person he knew would always have his back.

"puppy," he whispered again, grinning when Pakkun shifted his glare to him. "Hello, Pakkun."

Grunting, the dog laid his head down on top of Tenzo's knee and closed his eyes. "Sure," he leaned into Tenzo's hand a little. "I'll let you get away with that just this once."

All of the worries that had been plaquing his mind washed away. The mission report lay on the floor behind him, forgotten for the moment in favor of petting Pakkun. For the first time in three hours, Tenzo felt at peace all because of his Senpai and his grumpy looking puppy.

#Hatake Kakashi #Yamato #Ben asks for fic so of COURSE it has to include Yamato lol #Ficlet #Also lol guess who didn't realize you'd sent an ask until a day later T.T