#top13zepptraxx
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time is funny
word count: 562
*throws confetti* ITS THE FIFTH AGAIN
Dean wasn’t quite sure how long he’d been sitting there. It felt like an eternity. It felt like a second. Time was funny like that, he supposed, when your heart broke.
Involuntarily, he glanced up, across the empty room towards the back dungeon wall.
Cas had stood there. He’d been standing there forever ago (a second ago), eyes bright and teary, an awful, wonderful confession falling from his lips. He’d been smiling.
Why does this sound like a goodbye? Dean had asked.
Because it is, Cas said. A breath, a little hiccuping laugh that Dean had never heard before. I love you.
And then it came. Tendrils of nothingness enveloped Cas like a shell and he was gone.
Dean remembered Cas’ smile as it took him. The closure and satisfaction on his face. The happiness.
He couldn’t look at the rest of the room. He knew if he spent too long taking in the emptiness and the silence, he’d break even more than he already had. So instead, Dean forced his eyes back down, to where his hands rested in his lap.
Numbly, he traced a callus with a finger. For a moment, he wondered what Cas’ hands would have been like to hold.
Nothing like Dean’s, he thought. He’d had calluses since he was six from wielding his father’s weapons, and they’d only hardened as time went on. A thick scar on his left palm jutted out from all the times he had used his blood for some ritual or another. Dean’s hands were hardened and weathered. Why would Cas even want to hold them? All they were good for was killing.
I know how you see yourself, Cas’ voice echoed in his head. You see yourself the same way our enemies see you. You're destructive, and you're angry, and you're broken. Daddy's blunt instrument. And you think that hate and anger, that's... that’s what drives you, that's who you are. It's not. And everyone who knows you sees it.
All Dean was good for was killing. How many atrocities had his hands committed? How many lives had they ended? How many lives had he ended?
There were the monsters, of course. Monster after monster after monster. Lee, by Dean’s own hand. Perhaps they hadn’t been by his hand, but Dean was responsible for Charlie and Kevin’s deaths. John, for all Dean’s feelings about him, had died for him. The dozens of people he hadn’t been able to save. He’d held a gun to Sam’s head. And Cas—
Dean screwed his eyes shut. Scenes danced across the darkness; an angel blade hovering above Cas’s heart, his face covered in blood; throwing a punch in a too-clean room; suggesting they go after Billie, leading Cas to her library—
How could you say that? Dean wanted to scream at him. How could you call me selfless and loving after everything? How could you love me when all I do is hurt?
No, Cas would never hold his hands. Cas was dead because of them. Because of him. That loving, kind person Cas had thought he’d seen didn’t exist. Just Dean, with his bloody, hardened hands.
Dean wasn’t quite sure how long he’d been sitting there for, looking at his hands. For a few minutes. For forever. It didn’t matter. Time was funny, he supposed, when you were the reason your lover was dead.
tag list: @glowstickcas @blue-eyed-cutiepatootie @angelcaswinchester @floral-cas @castielsbeeslippers @gayhuckleberryinatrenchcoat @fellshish @bestiarum @top13zepptraxx @linaraiscorner @theedorksinlove @destiel-is-canon-i-guess @sansasworld
let me know if you want to be added or removed :)
#I know they’re alive and happy and in love… but I’m celebrating with angst first#happy fifth hellers <3#spn#destiel#castiel#dean winchester#my fic#my writing#spn 15x18
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If i may add something to your marvelous PowerPoint🙏, Misha posted a pic on ig on February 22nd with Robert Ray Wisdom (aka Uriel) saying that it was the last time Cas and Uriel were togerher, also asked people to text him "NSFW" for a picture of Cas in a onion field... We have never seen these scenes!!!
I remember that but I wasn’t sure exactly where it all fit in. Thank you, I will add a slide :)
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Damn you fanfic writers
With your amazing ability to bring the most beautiful perspectives and storylines to life while simultaneously capturing the essence of the characters you wrote about. I can’t handle how amazing you all are 😍😍😍
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end of the beginning - 507 words, destiel
requests are open!
What if when Cas uses the last of his grace, it isn’t a huge spectacle. It isn’t a tragedy.
What if it’s a quiet morning, in a fixer upper house that Dean has mostly fixed—there’s still more to be done, but they have time—and Cas has stopped his morning routine to watch Dean.
Dean is shaving, getting ready for their trip over to Sam and Eileen’s. It’s nothing out of the ordinary, something that Cas has watched countless times now.
But isn’t that the point?
That he has this privilege now?
Dean’s eyes are trained on himself in the mirror as he drags the razor down his face, his guard completely dropped. Shoulders relaxed. The sun streams in through the window just past him, creating a halo of light around his bedhead. And he’s the most heavenly thing Castiel has ever seen. The most perfectly human thing.
If Cas had more grace flowing through his veins, it would have been impossible for his heart to skip a beat. Now it’s impossible for it to not.
He can feel it, his grace waning. The very thought of it used to terrify him.
Now he welcomes it. There are no dangers here in their quiet town. No monsters. He doesn’t need to be an angel, a soldier, a guardian. He just needs to be Dean’s.
He spies the gray hairs scattered across Dean’s scalp, thinks of when his will match.
Dean suddenly winces, hisses through his teeth, and Cas snaps to attention. His reverie broken. He moves to Dean’s side as Dean reaches up to wipe at the bead of blood on his neck.
Cas doesn’t think anything of it, reaching up like he always has, with a steadier hand and a more confident touch than he had years before. He brushes his finger over the skin, heals it.
And it flows out of him like a breath. His body feels heavier, his lungs smaller. His heart pounds.
He opens his mouth and shudders.
Dean’s smile falters. “Cas, you okay?”
Cas grips his arm for support, leaning into him, as his knees threaten to buckle.
“Cas?”
Dean’s eyes grow wide as he wraps his arms around him. His voice verges on panic. “What’s going on? Talk to me, babe.”
And the feeling passes. Cas’s body—no longer a vessel—adjusts, and he stands. Breathes out a shuddery breath.
Dean glances over him, stilling. “Was that it?” he asks quietly.
Castiel smiles.
“Yes.” His voice is soft.
Dean’s grip on his tightens before it relaxes, and he lets out a shaky breath, something between a laugh and a sob.
“Are you okay?” A careful question.
Cas looks down at himself, as if something would look different. But he still sees the same dark slacks, the same bee socks. The same ring on his finger.
He sees his paradise.
He takes Dean’s face in his hands, breathing in deep, filling his human lungs. He smells Dean’s shampoo.
“I’m okay.” He kisses him, slow and soft. “We’re okay. I promise.”
—writing tag list (ask to be added or removed)
@10x02 @adammlligan @blue-eyed-cutiepatootie @castiel-for-lunch @castiel-is-a-cat @castielsbeeslippers @ccstiel @deanwinchesteradjacent @destieldisaster @destielfactory @donvex @dstiel @ensignabby @expectingtofly @falling-through-void @feraladoration @fireghost-x @galaxies-of-the-heart @galaxycastiel @garthed @himitsubana @ialwaysordericedcoffee @im-sam-fucking-winchester @lalisfandoms @lateral-org @llamasdumpsterfire @marvells @nightandwine @okamigamer1 @prime-catra @ragingdeansexual @rainbowscas @starsdahb @starrynightdeancas @takemetotheworld @tearsofgrace @top13zepptraxx @van-dynex @winchester-novak @wormstacheangel @writtenmemxries @zeffiroh
#destiel#destiel ficlet#deancas#fanfic#supernatural#human!cas#the 100k news inspired me#not really human!cas truthing#i love human!cas and angel!cas endgame equally#fic#mine*#emmawrites*#usershey#userdorksinlove#1k*
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anyway.
super-spoilers for 15.20 - please DON’T READ until you’ve watched
When Dean pulls his baby to a stop, the dust billows out from behind her. Twilight has fallen over this particular slice of Heaven and the reflection of the moon ripples across the surface of the water. He’s not sure how long he’s been driving (Bobby was right when he said that time was different here) but...he figures it’s been long enough.
He steps out of the Impala, letting Miracle jump out behind him with a happy yelp. She tears off toward the railing of the bridge and then sits, panting with her ears crooked. “What’s out there, girl?” Dean asks, not really asking - it’s just become a thing that he says to Miracle when she shows interest in something.
He stretches and revels in the way his back and knees don’t pop or ache in the slightest. He lets out a breath and when he inhales, he smells it. It tips his head down and brings a smile to his face. There’s dust on his boots and he swirls up more as he kicks over to open the trunk.
When he pulls his head out, crumpled to hell trench coat in his hands, he finds that he’s not alone. He’ll be along, Bobby had said, knowing smile. Sam would come too, down the road, but right now -
“Hello, Dean.”
Dean meets his eyes, his finger-in-a-socket hair, his perma-stubble and oh. “Let’s get two things out of the way,” Dean says firmly, walking toward the angel.
Castiel tilts his head in that deliberate act of confusion, but his eyes are sparkling. He’s long learned how to tell when Dean is joking. “Yes?”
“First, I hate that trench coat,” he says, pointing to the one Cas wears. “This is the right one.” He shoves over the ball of canvas in his hands and Cas doesn’t hesitate. He sheds his coat and takes the one from Dean - thinner and longer, belt floppy. It’s a trench coat that, years ago, Jimmy Novak pulled on in the middle of the night to leave his family, not sure what he was doing or where he might be going.
“And second?” Cas asks.
They’re close, now. Close enough that Dean can fuss with the lapels of the coat, straightening them and shaking the collar out. And then, his hand rests, big and warm, right over Cas’s heart. “Second is I love you too, you stupid son of a bitch.”
Before Cas can finish saying, “Dean I don’t think you should swear in Heaven,” Dean is kissing him. It’s awful - they’re both laughing into it and trying to hold each other the same way at the same time. It’s awful and a mess and they keep kissing until it’s not. Until it’s perfect. Until they’re perfectly slotted together.
They pull apart at Miracle’s bark, both of them looking over. In the time since Dean pulled over, it’s come on dawn and the sun is rising over the lake’s horizon. The dog is standing beside the Impala, tail wagging and ears cocked expectantly.
“Hey Cas,” Dean says, turning to rest his forehead against the angel’s, “wanna go for a drive?”
-
@prayedtoyou • @folklorecastiel • @valleydean • @good-things-do-happen-dean • @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you • @nesnej • @bianca29753 • @spaceshipkat • @madronasky • @dizzypinwheel • @kayrosebee • @feraladoration • @destielangst • @destiel-is–real • @destielle • @flowersforcas • @50shadesofqueerbait • @multifandomagic • @fluffiestlou • @geo-val • @menjiiii • @top13zepptraxx • @lanaserra • @eccentriccas • @trasherasswood • @angelresort • @starlightcastiel • @dreamnovak • @jazzbabythatsme • @lyndalynn • @organicpurplepants • @cursed-or-not • @contemplativepancakes • @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner • @galaxymysteryelephant • @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover • @one-more-offbeat-anthem • @keata-kaylee • @redsconfusion • @bennedict • @mishha • @smushedmuffins • @galaxycastiel • @itsinjustbeing • @winchester-novak
#deancas#destiel#deancas fanfic#destiel fanfic#deancas ficlet#destiel ficlet#dean winchester#castiel#spn fanfic#spn fanfiction#supernatural#spn spoilers#1520 carry on#my stuff
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@top13zepptraxx tagged me in this.. So let’s try this.
3 ships:
1. Destiel (Supernatural); I don’t think I could ever move on from shipping these two, ‘cause, you know...ha...ha....idk they just make me forget the hetero in bi sometimes.
2. Kirk/Spock (Star Trek); hmmm what do I say to this. I’m a sucker for skinny love typa thing what else can I say. Aaaaandd I’m a trekkie nerd trash, so.
3. The third position is kinda open, I guess. Could be Cherik (X-Men), could be Deckerstar (Lucifer, cause I’m hot for Chloe Decker), could be Johnlock (BBC Sherlock), could be Jam (The Office), and loads of other couples that I just think are adorable.
Last song: could this possibly mean last one I listened to? If so, then it’s The Lighthouse Keeper by Sam Smith which is totally gorgeous. I made a Destiel fanart to the song, check it out.
Last movie: Venom, rewatched for the 87534943748th time. My ex-gf might/might not have said I have monsterfucker tendencies. She might/might not have been true.
Currently reading: Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea by Jules Verne.
Hi @disasterbispn @nerdingz-prompts @n-ghtvision @dannosteve223 @bonbon-bun I hope I’m not a gnat for tagging you lol
#just something to pass time#also shameless promotion#destiel#kirk x spock#cherik#deckerstar#johnlock#jim and pam#deancas#supernatural#destiel is canon#dean winchester#castiel#spn#spn spoilers#destielclown#but at what cost#star trek#bbc sherlock#lucifer netflix#the office#sam smith#venom#symbrock#twenty thousand leagues under the sea#jules verne
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I love these.
Tagged by @mrs-brightside00 :)
Answer these questions and tag who you’d like to know better/catch up with!
Three ships: Destiel (supernatural obvi), ironically also Megstiel (supernatural), and Ten/Donna (as bffs, I’m not crazy. Soulmate bff pairs exist fight me)
Last song: Rät by Penelope Scott (I have had this on repeat for DAYS)
Last film: honestly I think Nightmare Before Christmas?
Currently reading: SHOUT by Laurie Halse Anderson and The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzzane Collins (both absolutely excellent!!)
I’m tagging;
@crowleysprincess159 @top13zepptraxx @wildfirewinchester @omgitsbrigitc @prayedtoyou @bookish-bi-christian @wait-whats-that-there
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WE DID IT!!! CONGRATS ON 100K DEANCAS FANFICS, EVERYONE!!
here’s a lil drabble to celebrate :) tag list is under the cut
“He was wrong, you know,” Cas says one night, out of the blue. They’re washing dishes in the kitchen, Dean with his hands full of soap and Cas with a towel in hand.
Dean hums noncommittally, turning his head to look at his angel. “What?”
“Chuck,” Cas clarifies. “Chuck was wrong. He said that this was the only universe where I fell for you. It’s not.”
“What do you mean?” Dean isn’t sure why they’re talking about this, or what Cas is talking about. Chuck had seemed pretty certain.
“I got a congratulatory email today from Becky Rosen,” Cas says, drying off a plate.
“Becky?” Dean repeats.
“Yes, Becky. She sent me a link. Apparently, there are 100,000 online stories with us as a couple,” Cas says.
“Cas, that’s fanfiction,” Dean says.
“And 100,000 different universes where we fall in love,” Cas says.
Dean rolls his eyes, handing Cas another dish. “You’re getting sappy, sweetheart.”
“Perhaps I am,” Cas agrees, smiling fondly, “but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s true. In 100,000 worlds, I’d choose you.”
Soapy hands or not, Dean cradles Cas’ face and kisses him.
“I’d choose you, too,” he says. They stay like that, foreheads pressed together.
Somewhere else, in some other universe, Cas is behind a counter blushing vividly as Dean flirts with him before getting his coffee. They’re dancing in an apartment as the rest of the world ceases to exist. They’re touching each other hungrily, making up for lost time. They’re kissing giddily in the rain, Dean fisting a trench coat while Cas brings his hands up to frame Dean’s face. They’re in Vegas, drunk on liquor and love as they stand in a chapel.
100,000 universes, and in every one, they choose each other.
Chuck can keep his stories. He can keep his badly written drafts and brothers-only narrative.
Cannon is their bitch now, and they’re in love, 100,000 times over.
tag list: @ccstiel @starrynightdeancas @floral-cas @castielsbeeslippers @ezikira @gayhuckleberryinatrenchcoat @fellshish @bestiarum @top13zepptraxx @linaraiscorner @theedorksinlove @destiel-is-canon-i-guess @blue-eyed-cutiepatootie
let me know if you want to be added or removed!
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They’re painting.
The sunroom is the last room left to be painted. Sam had suggested hiring someone to paint, but Dean insisted on doing it himself. This was his first real house—Cas’s first house—and he was going to do it right.
Cas reads a lot in the sunroom, so he chose the color—soft candlelight—a light yellow from the 2021 Colors of the Year collection. Dean couldn’t say he was surprised. It suited him.
They’ve only just finished cutting in the edges, and Dean already has paint all over his shirt. Good thing it’s an old one, from back when he thought it was cool to cut the sleeves off. Sometimes when he looks over at Cas, he catches him looking at the handprint on his shoulder.
Although he can’t really say anything since he keeps stealing glances at Cas, one of Dean’s old World’s Largest Ball of Twine shirts stretched across his shoulders. It’s a good look. And the worn pair of jeans Cas has on are definitely helping.
Dean isn’t looking when he goes to grab the paint roller, and he grabs the wrong end. He makes a face at the paint on his hand. That’s gonna be hard to wash off.
He starts to say something to Cas, but stops. Cas is looking at the handprint again. There’s a streak of paint on his cheek.
And that’s when Dean gets an idea.
He grins, ignoring Cas’s questioning gaze as he gets more paint on his hand and walks over to the angel.
Cas sighs. “Dean, if you put a handprint on my rear…”
He trails off as Dean pushes his sleeve up over his shoulder. The smile on Dean’s face faded as he concentrates, lining his hand up and carefully pressing it to Cas’s shoulder.
Stepping back, Dean smiles at his work. His own mark. His. The handprint on Cas’s shoulder a perfect replica of his own.
“Gotta stake my claim somehow. Now you’re mine, too.”
He meets Cas’s gaze and falters. The angel is staring at him with eyes wide and soft in that way that’s always disarming.
And then he grabs the front of Dean’s shirt and pulls him into a firm kiss. Dean startles into it but relaxes, pressing into him immediately. His arms wrap around the angel, hands sliding down to tug him closer, as Cas runs a hand up over the mark on Dean’s shoulder, gripping tight.
Cas draws back, ghosting his lips over Dean’s. “Was the wedding not enough?”
“Well, you’re a hot commodity, angel. I gotta do everything I can.”
Cas kisses him again. “I’ve always been yours, Dean.”
Dean flushes, but he doesn’t duck his head to look away, so Cas considers that a win. “Good. Yeah, uh, me too.”
Giving his arm a squeeze, Cas steps away and turns back to his side of the room, and Dean stifles a laugh.
Cas won’t be so amused later, but the yellow handprint on his butt is definitely worth it.
— writing tag list (ask to be added or removed)
@10x02 @adammlligan @alex-is-a-boy-b-tch @bixlasagna @blue-eyed-cutiepatootie @castiel-for-lunch @castiel-is-a-cat @castielsbeeslippers @nightmaredean @casiversary @deanwinchesteradjacent @destieldisaster @destielfactory @donestiel @donvex @dstiel @ensignabby @expectingtofly @feraladoration @fireghost-x @galaxies-of-the-heart @galaxycastiel @garthed @himitsubana @ialwaysordericedcoffee @im-sam-fucking-winchester @lalisfandoms @lateral-org @littlewolf2703 @llamasdumpsterfire @martymar1963 @witchdean @mrswatermelon @nightandwine @okamigamer1 @organicpurplepants @prime-catra @ragingdeansexual @starsdahb @spookynightdeancas @takemetotheworld @tearsofgrace @top13zepptraxx @van-dynex @winchester-novak @wormstacheangel @writtenmemxries @zeffiroh
#castiel#destiel#spn#supernatural#destiel ficlet#happy birthday cas#fic#mine*#emmawrites*#alivedean#inacatastrophicmind#tusercherub#useralison#userdorksinlove#usershey#usersila
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