Consume
Pairing: Ken Kaneki x Reader, mentions of Ayato Kirishima and Tatara x Reader
Summary: After being captured by the Aogiri Tree, Kaneki learns just how cruel ghouls can be. When whispers of what the higher ups kept you around for reach his ears, he offers you a moment of release in an attempt to ease your pain.
Disclaimer: Minors DNI, This follows the plot in the manga
Warnings: mentions of violence, slavery, use of aphrodisiacs, implied noncon, dubcon, unprotected sex, gentle sex, creampie, emotions
Word Count: 2.6k
Kaneki fought the urge to tear his eyes away from the ungodly sight of his blood-soaked hands tangled in a fresh corpse’s organs. He should’ve expected something like this when members of the Aogiri Tree broke into Anteiku and beat him to a pulp. But even after he’d been captured, he was still naive enough to think that he’d be able to find some type of common ground with them. Or at least be given a little mercy, considering one of his captures was none other than his best friend's brother.
It was all just wishful thinking. Touka’s brother was just as deranged as every other Aogiri member despite the fact that he considered himself to be ‘soft’ in comparison. Of course, Kaneki knew that whatever they had planned for him wouldn’t be pleasant, but he didn’t think it would be this bad. Grime built under his nails as he tore apart flesh and muscle, staining his own skin burgundy in the process. The unfortunate victim’s insides turning to sludge between his fingers with the slightest squeeze.
He felt like he was going to vomit. Although the horribly gory sight was enough to make anyone faint, the worst part was the hunger stirring inside him. He’d spent so much time starving himself, trying not to feast on human flesh, that the smell was almost inviting. He clutched onto his morals tightly, the endless string of bodies that he and his fellow captives were expected to pick apart did a good job of reminding him that this was no blessing in disguise but instead the worst imaginable torture for a prisoner of the Aogiri Tree. Unbeknownst to him, the worst was yet to come.
He pulled his gaze away to stop his head from spinning and caught a glimpse of you outside the doorway. You were following closely behind Ayato. Just the sight of you filled him with an immense amount of pity as he recalled his previous conversation with Banjou. When the anti-Aogiri group welcomed him with open arms, Banjou had filled him in on what they knew about each of the higher ups and their schedules. They were planning an escape and Kaneki was in on it from the moment they revealed their strategy.
But you had plagued his mind. You often brought him food just as you did for the other prisoners. A tiny slab of meat was all the Aogiri would allow each of them, it was just enough to keep them alive. You had always been kind to him but it was obvious to anyone that you were miserable. You never spoke unless you were spoken to and even then it seemed as if you were devoid of any personality. There were dark bags under your eyes and you were always shaking, Kaneki couldn’t tell if it was from the weather or malnourishment. Honestly, it might’ve been both. Even in the winter, all you wore was a thin night dress that stopped not even halfway down your thighs. And he doubted that you were being fed any more than the other captives.
He brought you up during one of the meetings thinking that you’d love nothing more than to escape. He hadn’t even known your name at the time but the others knew exactly who he was talking about. Even though he’d truly had the best intentions in mind, the grim expressions on his fellow prisoners’ faces made him think that he’d said something wrong. Banjou told him that even if you did want to escape, it would be almost impossible.
And from there on he explained everything. Your name was Y/N and the reason it would cause so much trouble to try and include you in their escape was because you were nearly always being watched by one of the higher ups. Kaneki remembered Banjou’s exact words, “When Ayato caught Tatara’s eye he was reluctant to join the Aogiri and the chaos he caused among the wards was too much for Tatara to contain so he offered up Y/N as a welcoming gift. He uses her as a pawn to keep Ayato in check.” The implications of what role you played in this organization made his stomach drop, his worries were only confirmed when Banjou added, “They give her regular aphrodisiacs so she can’t resist him. It’s sick.”
Allegedly, you were originally Tatara’s personal plaything before he’d given you to Ayato. Rumors said that even now whenever Ayato left the Aogiri’s base, Tatara would take the time to relieve the needs that the drugs caused you. If anyone was caught gossiping about your connection to Tatara, they would be killed faster than they could even say your name, which confirmed two things. One, that the rumors were more than likely true. And two, that Ayato probably had no idea.
Kaneki sat on the floor by himself as he waited for you to bring him his rations for the day. The manual labor from earlier that day left his arms sore and his stomach hollow. Your footsteps echoed down the hall until you entered the empty room to find Kaneki sitting with his back against the wall. You kneeled beside him and handed him the small chunk of meat wrapped in a cloth.
When he unwrapped his food he felt sick to his stomach. Flashes of how he’d been forced to tear apart lifeless bodies plagued his brain as he wondered which one of the corpses the meat belonged to. For all he knew it could’ve been from one of the bodies that he stripped down to the bone. No matter how hungry he was he couldn’t bring himself to eat something that came from an innocent civilian that was murdered in cold blood.
He looked at you as you were still kneeling beside him. He took in your appearance, your whole body was quivering, your hands were planted on the ground with your thighs tightly pressing themselves together around your forearms, shaky breaths escaped your lips and your pupils were blown wide. You were clearly under the influence of the aphrodisiac but you seemed worse than he had ever seen you before.
Today had been Ayato’s day to leave the stronghold but he was almost sure that the rumors of Tatara having you in Ayato’s absence were true. Perhaps Tatara was too busy to pay you any mind or maybe he was simply denying your needs as a punishment. The thought sent shivers down Kaneki’s spine. What they were doing to you was cruel, scratch that, it was so much worse than cruel. Out of all the prisoners of the Aogiri Tree, you were the one who was suffering the most. They were pumping you full of drugs so they could bend you to their will but when you were left with desires that weren’t even your own to begin with, they didn’t feel like they owed you any type of relief.
He held the meat out to you as he offered, “You can have it if you’re hungry.”
You frantically shook your head and pushed it back toward him, looking almost fearful. He set it on the ground and reached a hand out once again. This time he tucked your hair behind your ear, gently stroking your cheek with his thumb, trying to offer you some type of comfort. You closed your eyes and nuzzled into his hand. The words had stumbled out of his mouth before he had the chance to actually think about what he was saying, “I can help you.”
Your eyes quickly reopened, you were probably shocked by his offer. You stared at him as you thought about what he said. Your unsure gaze was making Kaneki believe that he’d crossed the line. But before he could apologize you leaned in close and softly pressed your lips against his. The kiss was as light as a feather as if the both of you were hesitant and timid.
You pulled away first and laid on your back, flinching at the feeling of the cold floor below you. The end of your nightgown pooled at your waist as you spread your legs, exposing your soaked panties. Kaneki blushed at the sight before he noticed you shivering. He pulled off his shirt and laid it over top of you, it wasn’t much but at least it was something. You were unfamiliar with being shown this kind of genuine consideration but you welcomed it nonetheless, tucking your arms under the shirt and pulling it up to your chin in an attempt to keep yourself warm.
He hooked his fingers along the sides of your panties and pulled them down your legs, your slick sticking to the fabric. You watched as he unzipped his pants and pulled his cock out. To your surprise, he was still soft. Usually, your partners, if you could even call them that, were always painfully hard and raring to go. He pumped his cock until he was fully erect and climbed on top of you. He balanced himself on his forearm, his face now inches away from yours. You could tell that he wasn’t sure what to do next so you reached between your bodies and grasped his cock, lining it up with your entrance.
He hesitated, “Are you sure?”
The look of concern on his face made your stomach flutter accompanied by a pleasant feeling you’d long forgotten since being dragged into the Aogiri. You nodded and he pushed into you carefully, although he wasn’t experienced himself he at least knew that the woman usually needed a moment to adjust. What he didn’t know was that with your day-to-day activities, the pain upon entry no longer bothered you. He filled you up perfectly. Your pussy clenched around him as you finally spoke to him for the first time that night, “You can move now.”
However, Kaneki kept his hips still as he was buried balls deep inside you. His cock felt so snug inside you, he had to resist the urge to cum right then. This was supposed to be all about helping you but he hadn’t expected it to feel so good. When he began thrusting into you, he took his time to ensure that he wouldn’t finish before he was able to relieve you. He hid his face in your neck, guilt consuming him for enjoying this so much. Banjou’s words echoed in his head, ‘It’s sick’. He knew it was fucking sick but he couldn’t help it. The overwhelming pleasure he felt rutting into you caused his mind to construe his own good intentions as being aligned with that of the perverted Aogiri that had taken advantage of you. When he let out a strangled moan you ran your fingers through his hair, sweetly shushing him to keep you two from being caught.
Goosebumps littered Kaneki’s arms from the cold air but between the friction of your bodies and Kaneki’s baggy shirt, you were nice and warm. Ironically, you felt more comfortable being fucked by a stranger on the cold floor than you had in either of your captor's beds. He was so much more gentle and caring than Ayato and Tatara had been. The only sound in the room was the quiet whimpers and hushed pants shared between the two of you.
Suddenly, it felt as if you were having some kind of out of body experience. You saw yourself laying on the ground with Kaneki on top of you, his hips moving in a slow broken rhythm. Your face was clouded with pleasure, you wondered if you always wore that fucked out expression when you had sex. You doubted it. Especially since half the time your face was being shoved into the pillow and the other half your features were scrunched up in pain. The soft stroke of Kaneki’s cock against your walls was such a nice change from the rough pounding you were usually given.
Watching him pleasure you with care and kindness left you mesmerized. This was what it was like to truly enjoy intimacy with another person. To relish in every touch, squeeze, thrust, kiss, and stroke. It wasn’t just meaningless sex to reach your orgasm, you were honestly loving every minute of this. You wouldn’t mind it if this was what you did every day. As you watched Kaneki tend to your needs you wondered if you’d ever be able to do this again, to decide what you wanted to do with your body and when you wanted to do it. You wondered if you’d ever be free.
You were brought back into your own body as a wave of euphoria crashed into you, leaving your body quivering just as it had before but this time in release rather than need. Your shaky legs wrapped around Kaneki’s waist, trapping his hips against you. He picked up on what your reaction meant and finally let himself go, your pussy milked his cock dry of all his warm cum.
As Kaneki tried to catch his breath, you held his shirt out to him, “Thank you.”
From then on whenever you brought Kaneki his rations for the day, he would tell you about the escape plan he and the others had. And when he met with the anti-Aogiri group he’d relay any messages you had for them. You had been able to open up to him and he felt responsible for your wellbeing. It was only a matter of time before you two would be able to escape, he’d take you back to Anteiku where you would make friends and be protected. If only the escape had gone down the way you’d all hoped
It started out pretty smoothly, you had been able to make it out of the stronghold with the anti-Aogiri. What no one had expected was the Bin brothers’ ambush. You should’ve seen it coming. Tatara was able to read you like a book, of course, he would suspect something was up when he began to see a glimmer of hope in your eyes. You were thrown into a cell with the rest of the escapees, except for Kaneki who’d been taken by Yamori.
Although your suffering was at the hands of Ayato and Tatara, you knew that whatever would happen to Kaneki would be far worse than anything any of you had experienced. It didn’t take a genius to know that Yamori was a sadist. He’d put Kaneki through the worst kind of torture imaginable and there was a pretty big chance that he’d die in the process. Your stomach turned and you were riddled with guilt. He’d been so kind to you, you should’ve just left him be. Maybe then he wouldn’t be in this position.
Suddenly, the cell wall was kicked in. Through the smoke, all you could see was the outline of a person with white hair. Tatara. You curled up in a ball and tears ran down your cheeks, he was surely here to punish you. When the smoke cleared you were met with the sight of the last person you expected. It was Kaneki, not Tatara. His hair was white instead of black. Your heart dropped at the overly cheerful expression on his face as he greeted you all.
“How-?” you began.
Your words were cut off when he wrapped his arms around you. “It’s okay.” Fear coursed through you as his hold tightened. His sense of responsibility for you twisting and contorting into something sinister. “No one will ever hurt you again.”
Of course. You’d been able to escape the arms of your captors and were thrust into the arms of a newfound monster that they’d created. There really was no escape from the Aogiri.
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Uta x reader - protect you
I REAALLLY love ur writings! No pressure! If u have time could u do a prompt #4 “Don’t you dare touch him/them/her" with my favorite mask maker Uta!!!! - Anon💜
You had never met any other ghoul beside Uta, and you only met him by accident.
You accidentally walked into his shop on a drunken night out with your friends and fell asleep on his shop floor.
Thankfully he was kind enough to look after you and you guys started dating a few months later.
Sitting on his desk, you were swinging your legs back and forth as you watched him work on something.
“Uta?” You called.
He turned to face you, pushing his chair towards you.
Letting it crash into the desk, he pulled himself round to the side you were on and rested his arms on your legs, taking your hands in his.
“Yes?” Hr asked.
“Can we go see a movie?” You asked.
“Sure if that’s what you want. We’ve got to wait, I’ve got some people coming by for a mask.”
You nodded your head.
You of course knew about what he did and now you knew where the ghouls got their masks from now.
Uta stood up, wrapping his arms around your waist as he buried his face into the crook of your neck, taking a deep breath.
You ran your fingers through his hair, pressing small kisses to the side of his head.
“Sorry we can’t go right away.” He murmured.
You laughed softly, shaking your head at him.
“It’s fine, you know that.”
You guys stood there for a few moments, before he pulled away and gestured for you to hide.
You nodded and did, and you waited.
A minute later you heard a scream and you stood up, finding a boy on the floor while Uta was staring down at him and you burst out laughing.
“Uta!” The girl with him whispered.
She charged over to you, placing her hand over your throat as she held you, showing you her eyes.
“A human?! Are you insane?!” She whispered harshly.
Uta stormed over, gripping her wrist tightly.
“Touka.” He warned.
“They’re a danger.”
Your boyfriend pulled her hand away and hide you behind him, reaching his hand back.
Grabbing his hand, you pressed yourself to his back and peak around him.
“Don’t you dare touch them.” He snarled.
She took a step back in pure shock, and watched as he spun you around, carefully inspecting your neck.
He made sure there was no damage before kissing your forehead.
“Okay?“ he asked.
“Yeah, I’m okay. I’ll just go in the back.”
He nodded his head and watched as you left before turning back to the two young ghouls waiting.
“If you dare hurt them Touka.” Uta warned.
“They’re a danger!”
“They are my partner! I have been with them for over a year!”
“You know how dangerous this is!” She yelled.
“And I know they won’t say anything, I mean it. If I find out you’ve done anything to them, I won’t be held responsible for my actions.”
The two had a stare off for a few minutes before she backed away.
“He needs a mask.”
“Fine.”
Uta got to work, but he made sure to keep a close eye on Touka, making sure she never went anywhere near the back.
Once he had everything he needed he shooed them away and walked into the back, climbing into the bed he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into his chest.
Uta tangled his legs with yours.
“You sure you’re okay?” He asked softly.
“I’m sure Uta, she’s just worried.”
“Still no excuse.”
“And scaring the boy was really necessary?”
“He’s a one eye. Very strange.”
You laughed and shook your head, flipping yourself over so you could rest your cheek on his chest as you carried on scrolling through your phone.
You still had some time to go out, you were just happy to sit there with Uta for a while, letting him destress after what had happened and know you were okay.
When he was ready you’d go see a film, but right now you were just going to enjoy one another’s company
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Wait…. Uh…. What exactly…. Did Mifuyu do again…? Of course, she was a part of the Magius, but…
There are lots of Mifuyu fans out there so I'm going to put this under a cut so they can skip my negativity if they want to
I personally found it pretty gross that she was the recruiter for WoM, with it being said over and over again how all these kids trusted her and joined the WoM *because* of her, while Mifuyu herself was so conflicted on the thing and knew that she was doing wrong. It doesn't help that she's an older person with lots of experience as a magical girl.
I dunno. It'd be one thing if Mifuyu was a part of WoM because she herself was weak and it only affected her. But she brought lots of kids into the cult too. Like... the only thing that made a bunch of recruits back down in the end was Mifuyu. That's the pull she had. That's how much trust people had in her. And I find it gross that she used kids to keep herself safe like that.
I think it also didn't help that the story was... it kept trying to say "wow look at how nice Mifuyu is! Felicia forgives her right away, Yachiyo still loves her etc etc". I much preferred the anime in this regard where Yachiyo still doesn't trust her/like her after all is said and done (I don't think Mifuyu needed to die though???). She shouldn't be trusted right away!! She shouldn't have been forgiven so quickly!!
Really, when thinking about it, I think that a large part of it is her presentation and how the story's characters reacted to her. You had a lot of characters rightfully hate Touka, Nemu, Alina, and even Holy Mami, but it felt like Mifuyu got off a little too free at the end. Yeah yeah she's all like "I need to atone for my sins!" but that wasn't satisfying for me whatsoever.
Honestly, the anime went a long way for me in making Mifuyu far more likeable-- it did this by making her character feel more solid (she wasn't the one to undo the mind control on SanaFeli, they left on their own accord instead), by making her feel more pathetic (drinking and lounging about while whining lmao), and then by getting her act together and standing up to TouNemu. It never felt like the anime was saying "oh yeah she's weak and she's letting all of this happen but don't worry guys she's still a really good person under it all!" It was more... "this woman is fucking pathetic and look at what she's letting happen to these kids who trust her. But maybe she can still redeem herself. She's scared. But she needs to try."
Her sacrifice at the end was so much better too, again even if I didn't think she should have died. Fuck getting injured going all out to a bear uwasa; having Mifuyu save all the recruits who were doppel syndrome'd, girls that she was personally responsible for their being there, was so so much better.
I know that there are far worse characters in the story morally-speaking, but Mifuyu just disgusted me for the longest time. But the anime and her fairytale mgs went a good way of smoothing her over for me. The anime actually made me like Mifuyu.
Anyways, that's why I personally dislike her. I know she has a lot of fans on tumblr (and then a lot of detractors in other places), but this is my own personal opinion on the thing.
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mentions of toxic relationships, manipulation, narcissism, & alcohol.
let’s talk about a toxic kaneki.
a kaneki that you can’t get away from, no matter how hard you try or how bad you want to.
this is a ken who you’ve known for almost your whole life. a ken you’ve been involved with since middle school. back when things were cute & giggly.. back when holding hands was intimate & thinking about your first kiss with him gave you a thousand butterflies in your tummy.
it’s just that.. things started to hit the fan as you two got older. he doesn’t have a dad.. he barely had a mother around to teach him all the right ways to treat a women. really, you couldn’t have expected him to be perfect nd cute forever.
i mean of course your relationship had love. you loved each other.. but it was fucked up. it was twisted nd it was unhealthy. you two knew that.. you knew it better than anyone else but did you love each other enough to stop hurting one another..? who knows.
kaneki doesn’t want a life without you. he can’t even fathom it. but he’s a 19 year old boy and he’s a handsome one at that.. when things go left with you, he turns right to touka. you fucking hate her. she was beautiful, truly. you couldn’t even talk down on her because you went the extra mile to try to be like her. especially after he told you that he’d been fucking her.
he didn’t just cheat, he told you every little detail, how she sucked him off this way, nd how she rode him that way. but kaneki knows that his mind was thinking of you the whole time. kaneki knows that he slipped up nd moaned your name a couple times.. kaneki knows that he faked an orgasm nd had to go home early so he could get himself off.
you’re no better though. it’s an entanglement. when kaneki’s out fucking touka, you’d run to her brother. ayato.. he cared for you. he held you so delicately, talked to you so prettily, fucked you so good. he was better than kaneki.. at a couple things but he wasn’t yours.
after days of arguing.. days of being with other people nd days of being without each other. you always end up in the passenger seat of kaneki’s car. sitting so pretty, like you were his doll. his perfect doll of a gf. you always ended up at his house, in his bed, in his arms.
“when are you gonna stop fucking ayato?”
“whenever you stop fucking up.”
“cmon baby. i don’t mean to. things just get hard, i wanna do better y/n. i promise i do. i want us, more than anything. just give me a chance.. give me time..”
“how many times have we talked about this, ken? how many times are we gonna give empty apologies, how many times are we gonna break up & get back together..? how many fucking times??”
“as many times as it takes for us to get better. i’m not gonna let you give up, you can’t.”
“why do you always manipulate me..?”
“you’re a smart girl, baby. i don’t manipulate you. don’t be silly. i just help you see what’s best for you. that’s why you need to be with me- to stay with me. you’re the best version of yourself when you’re with me, y/n. can’t you see that? ayato will never be able to do what i do for you. he’s not me.”
you want to believe that what he’s saying is a lie, but you can’t. he’s such a pretty boy, nd his voice is even prettier. everything he says puts you in a daze. his narcissistic words fall from his tongue so easily, & something about that makes your pussy throb. you know you guys need help, but you can’t control who you love. & kaneki couldn’t control the way he was raised.
after a period of time where you two had been doing particularly well, kaneki gets invited to a party by none other than hide. you tell him no, that he can’t go- that he won’t go. then he’s pressing kisses down your neck nd putting pretty hickies on the flesh.. he has you bent over the edge of your bed, babbling about nothing, going dumb over his dick.
the smallest part of you gains the strength to say, “—party ken. no party. i don’t want you to go..”
“i know, princess. we’re going.”
nd his thrusts would pick back up as a hand went to grip your neck.
what happens at the party is stupid. you see touka there & your heart stings. did kaneki want you to come, knowing she’d be here..? he has his hand on the small of your back, & he presses a chaste kiss to your head before giving you a “behave.”
you’re tired of behaving. tired of being his good girl that just obeys his every word & instruction. he walks off from you & leaves you with his best friend. hide offers you a couple of shots & different girls in the room took some with you. when the alcohol began to hit you, you found yourself in the middle of the room dancing. shaking your ass in the small dress you wore that only had a small thong under it. the girls were hyping you up, smacking your ass & cheering you on.
then came spin the bottle & you were sitting criss cross applesauce across from hide. your mind was hazy but you thought about how good he looked right now.. maybe it was the vodka. or maybe you really did wanna fuck him. you spun the bottle nd it landed on him. everyone cheered nd different people recorded. you crawled over to hide nd gave him a sloppy but hot kiss.
you were drunk. you didn’t care where it was posted to or who saw.
kaneki had been with a separate set of his friends & when he opened his phone to see you on someone’s instagram story kissing his best friend..?
he didn’t know if he was gonna murder you or him. he was livid.
but that’s a different story for a different day.
>.<
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In the end I decided to share a comfort scene from a different WIP than originally planned, so it ended up being Tobirama's POV after all. The story follows the trope "help from the enemy" and includes a neurodivergent Tobirama 🙃
Hope you enjoy!
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Warning: description of injury, panic attack
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It was official – Tobrama was screwed. Figuratively speaking, of course.
He looked down at his knee which was bent and twisted at an odd angle, shaking hands hovering uselessly over the rapidly swelling joint, and then took a look around him, a curse falling from his lips.
Yes. Definitely screwed.
It served him right for being careless with the Hiraishin. The jutsu was still in the experimental stages of development. Although it was stable enough to use at short distance and he had been pushing its limits for the last few months with very promising results, he had no chance to conduct further testing yet. At some point he had wanted to place the seals or just use his special kunai to check how well the technique would hold up if he attempted long-distance travel through the jutsu, but it was supposed to be conducted in a safe environment when his chakra stores were full. He certainly never planned on testing this out while he was playing a game of hide and seek with his nephew.
The fact he was currently recovering from an injury and chakra exhaustion, and was supposed to be in bed instead of running around the compound like a madman with a giggly five year old hot on his footsteps was neither here nor there, though Tobirama strongly suspected he was going to get an earful from Hashirama, Mito, Touka, and his medic when he managed to get back home. He was supposed to follow the medical advice and he knew that. It was just hard to do when his body felt as if it was vibrating with energy.
Following orders wasn’t really an issue here, he knew. In all fairness, he had always had a difficult time sitting still and his family was very much aware of that.
It used to annoy his father a lot. Butsuma would smack at his fidgeting hands or legs, or just cuff him on the head, before instructing him in a voice brooking no argument to “stop with this nonsense at once”. He would always punish Tobirama for any wrongdoing by having him sit in the corner motionless for hours on end or by forcing him to stay in his room for days with nothing to distract him. No books, no toys, no paper, no ink, no visitors, no nothing. It had always been the worst kind of punishment. At first, he used to cry a lot because of it, but as he grew older, Tobirama learnt to cope. He knew he got it relatively easy too. Hashirama always had it worse.
Thankfully, the restlessness became more manageable when he got his hands on some herbal remedies that were supposed to keep a person calm. Though the tea tasted like wet grass, it did help quite a lot in keeping his mind in check most days. Because, at the end of the day, it all had to do with his head. His messed up, weird brain that made him act in ways that always irritated people.
He couldn’t help it though. It was just the way he was. He just couldn’t stop thinking. Some days it felt as if his mind was racing, making it impossible to focus on anything, while others he would be lost to an idea, so consumed by it he forgot to eat and sleep. There were days when he wanted to do things, but couldn’t decide what he wanted to work on and in the end did nothing, which in turn made him feel like he was wasting time. He got distracted and irritated easily, forgot things that were important all the damn time, became obsessive and nit picked at things to the point where he often had to just start over or abandon the project before it drove him crazy.
It was all in his head and he couldn’t control it, and now it landed him somewhere in the forest away from home next to a kunai he must have used and forgotten about, because he was stupid and his brain was not right. On top of that, he was injured to the point where he couldn’t stand, much less walk, he didn’t have enough chakra to attempt another Hiraishin, and it was late enough in the afternoon that it would soon be getting dark. He was basically stranded in a place he didn’t recognize, all alone and with no means of protecting himself.
His eyes itched as he tried to stop himself from crying in frustration. Now was not the time for tears.
He bit off a groan as he shifted his weight. The only reason why he had injured his leg was because the area had been already tender before and he had twisted it upon landing on the uneven forest floor. The pain was horrendous, probably one of the worst he had ever experienced in his life. It was obvious that he had to set it and have it healed, but the mere thought of touching his knee was already too much. Besides, it wasn’t like he knew anything about setting dislocated joints or iryojutsu. In all likelihood, he would only make things worse.
Swallowing thickly, he leaned back against the tree and closed his eyes, feeling like a pathetic hopeless child as the tears finally escaped, trailing silently down his face.
It was hard to say how long he just sat there, crying and in pain, before he heard something.
Eyes snapping open, he looked around, his body tensing. He would be unable to fight in his current state, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t at least try or that his instinct to protect himself was any less present.
Another faint rustle, a swish of misplaced air, and then there was someone standing in front of him.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
Tobirama couldn’t help but laugh, the sound of it hysterical, as he looked up to see the bewildered face of Uchiha Madara.
He likely appeared rather unhinged, to say the least, considering the fact he was still crying on top of laughing, but that didn't really matter much, did it? Not when he was pretty sure he was about to die.
“Senju?” Madara took a step closer, the expression on his face shifting into something unreadable. “Are you… Is everything alright?”
This only made Tobirama laugh harder, but before long the laughter turned into sobbing and he could do nothing about it. Although he tried hard to calm down, he couldn’t. He was tired, he was in pain, he was going to die. It was all too much, all of a sudden.
And then he just couldn’t breathe.
Couldn’t catch a full lungful of air. Couldn’t move.
His vision blurred and all he could think about was how much of a failure he was. If he hadn’t gotten distracted, if he was able to focus better, if he wasn’t useless and not right, and if things were just different.
If he could do something the way it should be done for once instead of always messing everything up, and if he—
A pair of warm hands was placed on his cheeks. A wash of chakra, warm as the hands that held his face ever so gently, settled around him, pulling him in and embracing him. His breath hitched as he reached out blindly and fisted his hands in the fabric covering strong forearms, desperate to hold onto something, to feel something other than panic and pain, and fear.
“Deep breaths, Senju.” Madara’s voice was calm and deep as he murmured the words. “In and out. In and out. You’re fine. I’m not… I’m not going to hurt you. I promise. Now breathe with me, alright? In and out, in and out, in and out…”
It took forever before Tobirama fell into the rhythm of breathing in sync with Madara and even longer before he was able to stop crying, all but choking on the sobs that made him shake all over. His face was red by the end of it, both because of the tears and because of embarrassment. To shatter in this manner in front of his enemy, to break down and clutch like a child to a man who probably hated him was unbecoming to say the least.
Pathetic. Truly pathetic. That’s what he was, wasn’t he?
Gods, if father could see him now, he would have never heard the end of it.
Madara smoothed his thumbs over Tobirama’s cheeks, wiping away some of the tears in the process. The gesture was enough to distract Tobirama.
“Better?” Madara asked him.
“Y-yes,” Tobirama responded on a hiccup as he forced himself to release Madara’s sleeves. “I’m, I'm f-fine.”
It didn’t seem as if Madara believed him fully, but he still moved away, taking his hands off of Tobirama’s face.
“Good. Can you tell me what you are doing here now?” The careful way in which the Uchiha asked this question grated on Tobirama’s nerves. It was clear that Madara pitied him and the idea of it was infuriating.
“It’s n-none of your b-business, is it?” He said in a shaky voice that was laced heavily with all the anger and irritation he was currently feeling.
“Senju—”
“No,” Tobirama barked. “What do you want?”
Madara sighed. “Believe it or not, I only mean to help you.”
“I don’t need your, your help!” His voice carried as he yelled. “The sh-show is over, Uchiha! And if if you’re a man of your word, th-then you will just leave me be! I don’t—”
“Oh really?” Madara cut in, one of his eyebrows rising before he glanced meaningfully at Tobirama’s mangled leg and then back up. “That’s what you call fine?”
Tobirama pressed his lips into a thin line and turned his head away, stubbornly refusing to acknowledge that Madara had a point. It was an utterly stupid move, since Madara could still decide to kill him, but at the same time it was not as if Tobirama could stop him if he tried either way.
They were silent for a moment before Madara spoke again.
“Humour me, will you?” He said. “Which part of what is going on here is fine, hm? Your dislocated knee, the panic attack, your nonexistent chakra reserves, or the fact you’re clearly stranded with no means of getting back home?”
Tobirama snorted mirthlessly. “Why should I?” He asked. “And what is it to you? What does it matter?”
“It may, it may not.” He saw Madara shrug out of the corner of his eye. “And I can leave you here if you would prefer that. I’m not about to force you to cooperate. If you would much rather die in the middle of the woods, then be my guest. I just think it’s pointless when we could work on setting your knee and getting you somewhere safe.”
“Why though?” Tobirama asked as he looked back up and met Madara’s eyes. “Why would you… Why offer to do that? I’m your enemy, Uchiha. You should want me dead. Helping me, it’s… It makes no sense.”
Instead of answering right away, Madara just hummed noncommittally and went about taking the leather knapsack off his back. Then he removed his cloak and, after hesitating for only a moment, placed it over Tobirama, tucking it around his shoulders. The weather was still relatively cold this early into spring. In the heat of the moment and because of his panic, Tobirama didn’t even realise how cold he was in his yukata until the cloak was placed over him. He shivered before reluctantly pulling the heavy warm fabric closer, the scent of pine and smoke tickling his nose as he breathed in.
Madara watched him do it in silence and then reached into the knapsack, removing a waterskin from inside of it. He unscrewed the cap and took a large sip, swallowing visibly, before he extended the waterskin to Tobirama, clearly asking if he wanted a drink. Tobirama just nodded and took it with hands that still trembled, gulping down at least half of its contents before passing it back to the Uchiha.
“I don’t understand you,” he said then and was surprised when it made Madara laugh.
“You’re not the only one,” the man told him with a smile that looked odd but also strangely pleasant on his handsome face. “If you really want to know why I’m doing this, why would I offer you help instead of killing you… The answer is simple. I don’t want you dead.”
It was Tobirama’s turn to laugh. “Really? That's it? And how am I supposed to believe that?”
“You don’t have to.” Madara shrugged again. “But it is the truth, Senju. Despite everything, I still consider Hashirma a friend. It would be in poor taste if I didn’t at least try to help you, wouldn’t it?”
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Reconciliation (Touken/Kanetou fanfic) [Part 1/2]
Summary: Instead of fighting Arima Kishou, Kaneki decides to escape with Touka, Hinami, and Yomo. But can he really live on, content with the person he has become after all that has happened? With Touka by his side, as well as their friends, maybe he can live on with some semblance of happiness.
Words: 8,619~
Notes: This fic is dedicated to the wonderfully talented and kind @hakucho-art!!!!!!! It took longer than expected but it's finally here! I'll try to add a second part some time soon! It was fun writing this au ^_^. This fic has scenes of violence and PTSD.
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Kaneki collapsed onto his knees, the strength leaving his body. His skin was cold and clammy, his breathing erratic, and he looked up with wide, quivering eyes.
A sharp point pierces his left eye, seamlessly cutting through his flesh and into his brain. He screams, incoherently crying out with immense pain as he feels the loud grating of metal move against his flesh and bone. His body spasms and his kagune erupts from his back in the form of disjointed appendages. They reach forward, desperately grasping the weapon being pushed into his eye, and with an animalistic cry, he pulls the weapon out, his warm blood spilling out from the wound and down his face. He continues to scream, clawing at his face as it continues to burn with endless agony.
Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stopMakeitstopMake it–
He gasped and his eyes shot open. Rolling over on his bed, Kaneki dry heaves a few times, his body trembling. He grasped his throat first and then his face, realising that the wound was nothing more than a figment of his nightmarish imagination.
Wiping away the drool from his lip, he turns back onto his back and stares blankly at the ceiling. He continues to breathe heavily, his chest quickly rising and falling while he takes a moment to recollect his thoughts. He was not locked in any kind of battle, but in a spare room in Yomo's safe house.
He brushes his hair back from his damp forehead and shuts his eyes, taking a slow, deep breath. His body stills and everything is quiet again. There's nothing to be afraid of. There is no wound.
He never did fight Arima in the end, and yet, the fear he had consumed him when he saw the reaper's imposing figure in that large, underground space continues to cling onto him, piercing through his dreamless sleeps with threats of never ending suffering. Worse than the pain, though, was the reminder that he was, in the end, a coward. A coward for running away, for turning his back, and wanting to live. What had urged him to do such a thing, especially after all the sacrifices of his friends and companions. He wasn't sure, even now. All he knew was that he had eventually collapsed in the underground tunnel and was found by Yomo soon afterwards. Had it been up to Kaneki, he would've insisted that he'd be left to die at the hands of the CCG, to be hunted down by the grim reaper and cut down for his cowardly existence. It would've been right, it would've been perfect.
But Kaneki was not going to complain to the man who saved his life at the risk of his own. He was not so selfish to do such a thing to his saviour. Still, it left him feeling hollow most days, mindlessly questioning the reason as to why he was still alive. He could still taste the blood in his mouth - sickeningly delicious and…human. Yomo wasn't the only reason he had survived that day, Kaneki knew. It pained him all the more, but he could not bring himself to think about what had happened. He was afraid that it would be enough to shatter him entirely.
"Coward." Kaneki muttered, twisting the bedsheets around his clenched fists.
There was a knock on the door and Kaneki flinched, Yomo entering the room. "Oh, you're awake?"
Yomo looked as cool and calm as he always did. It seemed nothing could stirr his stoic exterior. That said, Kaneki knew better than to assume that Yomo was not also hurting from Anteiku's fall. It had been his safe haven, just as it had been to all the others who resided there. It used to be his too. He had hoped that it could've been again, had fate not been so cruel as to snatch it away from his empty palms. If only he could have protected it in the end. If only he had not been-
"I'll be going to check on Kirishima and Fuiguchi. Will you be joining me?" Yomo asks and Kaneki's grip relaxes. He looks up, a small light in his grey eyes.
"Would that be alright?" He asks with some hesitation.
Yomo shrugs. "Sure, I don't see why not. They've both wanted to see you the last few days." Yomo pauses for a moment, wavering in the doorway. "How's your stomach?"
Kaneki looks down, his stomach wrapped with bandages. There's been no bleeding from what he could tell, though it has felt bruised since his battle with Amon. And with how 'starved' he's been, as Yomo puts it, his healing has been slow on the uptake. The wound was not as severe as it had been, at the very least.
"It's fine." Kaneki says, pulling aside the covers. "I would also like to see them."
"I'll make some coffee and then we can leave." Yomo nods, closing the door.
Kaneki nods back, lowering his eyes. Would it honestly be alright for him to see them again? To see her?
. . .
Hinami rushed around the living room, carrying wrinkled clothes with one arm and a duster in her other hand. Her cheeks were warm with a mix of excitement and nervousness, her heart fluttering with the thought of seeing Kaneki again. It has been a little over a week since she and Touka left the destroyed remains of Anteiku; Yomo initially took them to a bunker before moving them to a spare apartment he owned, and during this time, he apparently found Kaneki and had him stay in the bunker instead. Yomo has only visited them once since then and he shared minimal information concerning Kaneki’s condition. All the two of them knew was that he was still alive somehow.
Touka had been the one to ask about the others from Anteiku. At the time, it seemed like Yomo was going to leave without sharing any kind of news, perhaps in fear of upsetting them more than they already were. But in the end, he relented and told them that he was not sure of Irimi or Koma’s condition or location. He had heard rumours that Kaneki had saved the two of them in the midst of battle, though he could not be sure until he asked Kaneki himself. As for Yoshimura, he kept silent, signifying his ultimate defeat at the hands of the CCG. Hearing this, Touka lashed out and punched the wall, leaving behind a large crack, before storming back into her room. Hinami remained still, eyes wide and wet with tears, yet none fell in the end. She was simply speechless, dumbfounded even. It was probably something she should have expected, especially after the cafe was destroyed, but it was still a shock to have it confirmed. Touka has remained mellow since, lamenting her survival, and Hinami struggled with her own feelings of guilt for her continued inability to help the ones she loves.
However, hearing the news that Kaneki was not only well, but would be visiting them soon brought with it a burst of energy that she hasn’t felt in what feels like a long time. Touka has yet to find out, since she has been taking a shower since Yomo’s phone call, but Hinami was almost certain that Touka will also be thrilled with this sudden visit. After all, Kaneki and Touka were better together - she has always thought so in the past and she hoped it will remain true today.
Touka entered the room dressed in a shirt and some shorts and a towel around her neck. Drying her hair, she looked around curiously.
"What's all this?" Touka asked and Hinami beamed with a bright smile.
"Yomo will be coming over with Kaneki." She continued to hurry around the room, fixing anything that was out of place. Touka's eyes widened for a moment and before she could ask anything else, the doorbell rang. "They're here!"
Hinami rushed to the door, quickly hiding away the items in her hands, and Touka stiffened, clenching the towel between her hands. The door opened and she jolted back towards her room in a panic, hearing Hinami cheerfully greet the two guests.
"It's good to see you again, Hinami-chan." Kaneki smiled and patted her head, ruffling her hair. She blushed and her eyes filled with tears. She hugged him, tightly holding onto him, and with some surprise, he hugged her back. "I'm sorry I worried you."
Yomo moved past. "Where's Kirishima?" He asked and Hinami quickly moved back, suddenly embarrassed.
"W-Well…" She moved towards Yomo and looked around the room. "I'm not sure. She was here a moment ago."
"Hold on!" Touka called from her room. Kaneki joined the others in the living room, his eyes wandering across the room.
"I-I tried my best to clean it up before you two arrived." Hinami confessed, fiddling with the rim of her shirt.
"It looks good." Kaneki assured her, and Yomo nodded along in agreement. Hinami nodded back and looked down, her cheeks warm.
"I'll make some coffee!" She then exclaimed and hurried to the kitchen.
"I'll help." Yomo followed behind and Kaneki awkwardly placed himself down onto the couch.
Touka's door opened then and with some hesitation, moved towards the living room, where her eyes locked onto Kaneki's. His hair was still a snowy white, his skin pale, and dark shadows around his grey eyes. His eyes, though, looked back at her with a warmness she hasn't seen for months now. It was a warmness she remembered from their days before his torture. He stood with a slight bow and she noticed that he had grown an inch or two, or perhaps his figure was more impressive than it had been before; his shoulders were broader, his torso slimmer, but defined under his dark shirt. He was both the Kaneki she once knew and a completely new person she has yet to know.
"Hi," Kaneki says with a low voice, a mix of shyness and shame in his almost pained expression. "It's been a while."
"Well," Touka rubbed the back of her neck, looking away. "Not much time has passed since we last saw each other."
Both thought of the day the two reunited on the bridge, where Touka had confronted him for his avoidance. She had lost control of her temper and lashed out against him, leaving him beaten and bruised. When she returned home that day, she was consumed with overwhelming embarrassment, certain that she had only succeeded in pushing him away further. And knowing that he had joined the battle against the CCG's assault on the 20th Ward, she feared that she had pushed him into his grave. She couldn't bear the thought that she had spent their last moments together berating him. After everything she has lost, she should've known better than to act out like some kind of child.
But now, Kaneki has returned - he was standing right in front of her, alive and well. It's almost as if she has been granted a second chance to redeem herself, to say all the things she had failed to confess before. Still, she felt weirdly conflicted. As grateful as she was, it stung to see him after all of this time. He remained a shadow of his former self, and though that was not something she could blame him for, it was not something she wanted to accept. But there was nothing either of them could do to repair the torment he had to suffer through in the past. They could only move on with the present. With that in mind, she ultimately decided that, perhaps, it would help the both of them if she first apologised for her actions.
Just as she was about to squeeze out a small apology, Kaneki spoke first. "I'm sorry." He said with a quiet voice. "I'm really sorry, Touka-chan."
Touka shook her head. "No, I'm–"
Hinami and Yomo walked in then, with Yomo carrying a tray of coffee. The room filled with a familiar fragrance, a bittersweet aroma that reminded them all of days that were now long past. Hinami skipped to Touka's side and clung to her arm, shaking it with excitement. Her joy was infectious and Touka couldn't help but smile in return. Taking the mug Yomo passed to her, she took a sip of the delicious coffee, swallowing down the words she wanted to tell Kaneki.
The four of them sat together for a while, inquiring Yomo for news of what was currently happening across Tokyo now that the battle against Anteiku has died down. The city has always been quick to move on from these intense conflicts, with the media pushing out superficial reassurances that all was now safe and stable. The world of ghouls has never known peace, and this moment, like many others, was just another wave that pushed them further back into the shadowed crevices of society. It was something they have come to expect growing up as societal outcasts, and yet, it was painful being oppressed so violently by those that deemed them as nothing more than monstrous pests.
With this thought, Touka thought of Ayato and the cruel words he had thrown against her. The way he had punished her for foolishly believing, once again, that she could live alongside the humans that despised their existence. She struggled against him, but now, she was weighed down with the thought that he had been right, that perhaps the only way to live freely in this world was to fight against it.
At the time, Kaneki had hurt Ayato for his violent aggression against her. She vaguely remembered her brother's agonised, garbled cries as Kaneki spoke in a quiet, apathetic voice. He had saved her that day, but he had also abandoned her, betraying her just as her brother had done. She glanced up at Kaneki, then, clenching the mug between her hands.
Catching her eye, he held her gaze before she abruptly looked away, her cheeks warm. He had apologised to her first, though she never expected an apology from the guy she had punched. Multiple times. Across the face. She shouldn’t be too surprised, she thought, considering how soft he had always been in the past. Still, so much time has passed since then and after distancing himself from her for almost a year, she wasn't exactly sure what to expect from him. Regardless, she should've been the one to apologise first - that much she was sure of.
"The question is," Yomo's voice breaks through her thoughts. "What's next?"
They were all silent in response to his question, the air heavy with anxious uncertainty. Yomo leaned back into his seat, a slight crease on his brow as he considered his next words.
"I am not sure how safe we are here." He explained. They were currently located in the third ward, though the whole of Tokyo has been in a continuous, suspended state as the heat from battle gradually faded back down to a simmer. Both ghouls and humans alike were waiting tensely on the sidelines, licking their wounds and watching the other in anticipation of their next move. "That said," Yomo crossed his arms, his frown deepening. "I wonder if it would be best to move to the underground–"
"Absolutely not." Touka immediately protested, cutting through his words with an aggressive sharpness. "I thought I made it clear before that I will not allow you to force Hinami through that. We'll figure something out, just…" Her voice trailed off with a wince. "Just anything but the underground ward. It's worse than death down there."
Hinami watched Touka silently, concerned yet curious. She would not argue against Touka, though she wondered if her weakness was hindering the safety of the others. Of course, if she were to ask, they'd all adamantly insist that this wasn't the case, or at the very least, that her fragility was not something they deemed a hindrance. Those hypothetical words, words she has heard many times before, rattled her in her mind and a bitter resentment began to swirl in the pit of her stomach.
It was then that she considered Takatsuki Sen's offer; Hinami had kept the business card that the author had given to her, and after their last conversation, Hinami wondered if confiding in her once again would provide her some kind of answer. In the end, she was the only one that told Hinami what she always knew to be true - that she was weak, and that this weakness was poisoning her loved ones. If she could somehow counter that inadequacy of hers, Touka, Kaneki, and Yomo wouldn't have to endanger themselves for her sake. Just as her parents had done.
"What are the current movements of the CCG?" Kaneki asked and Yomo thought for a moment.
"Even though they ultimately won the battle in the 20th Ward, they need time to recover. Patrols are being covered by lower-ranked officers and there's a greater push for public surveillance. It is nothing out of the ordinary, however."
"Have they released any new or updated profiles on us?" Touka asked.
Yomo shook his head. "I don't think so. Not yet, at least. They're still compiling the reports on the recent battle. It'll still be a few weeks until they return to their usual investigations. In the meantime, I can't say for sure what information they have on us."
"Needless to say, it would be best if we kept our heads low." Kaneki adds, leaning forward. "Relocate, stay out of the public. We can keep our ears to the ground and if we find that it's too risky for us to stick around, we'll consider more…" He glanced at Touka. Her eyes narrowed with clear displeasure. "Extreme alternatives."
Touka tutted and turned her head away, bringing her coffee up to hide her face. She bit her lip and let the conversation fizzle away into a complacent silence. Her eyes drifted to the nearby window, the curtains drawn, but a slither of sunlight slipping through the gap in between the thick drapes. It was midday, the city was no doubt busy with activity and human life. Had this been like any other day, she would be attending school right now, preparing herself for college entrance exams. But now, she and Hinami were once again trapped indoors, confined by a life of endless struggle and despair.
How long would she have to wait this time before going outside again? Would she ever return to school? Probably not, Touka already knew. She wouldn't see Yuriko or try the cooked lunches that left a loving ache in her stomach, or enter the warm embrace of the cafe she called her home, where she'd see the welcoming smiles of her caring peers. All these memories were nothing more than figments of a life that has once again been stolen away from her. How was any of this fair? No, it wasn't fair, but it was a life she has always known. And still, with each new tragedy, she found herself crumbling under the pressure of it all, from the weight of memories that she'll never relive in the living world.
"I'm not feeling too well." Touka announced, placing down her coffee and standing from her seat. "I'm going to my room. Let me know if you need anything else."
Kaneki watched her, his heart twisting at the sound of her evident misery. Her eyes remained downcast, almost lifeless, and he was tempted to reach out towards her. But he didn't and instead, watched her as she walked to her room, shutting the door behind her. He bit his lip, looking down. Hinami shuffled in her seat, suddenly uncomfortable with the stiff silence between the three of them.
"She'll be fine." Yomo insisted, standing from his own seat. "She's strong. Always has been." He then looked at Kaneki. "I should be going now. We need to secure some food for these two. Will you be joining me?"
Kaneki hesitated for a moment, clasping his hands together. He finally replies with a nod. "I'll help in whatever way I can."
And with that, the two leave after saying their farewells to Hinami. Afterwards, Hianmi takes all the half empty mugs to the kitchen and wonders what she should do next.
. . .
The drive through the city was quiet. Kaneki wasn't sure where exactly they were going, though he guessed that since the raid, Yomo had found a new location to gather 'food'. Truth be told, Kaneki was still not fond of the idea of collecting human corpses for consumption, but he refused to do nothing whilst his friends suffered from his continued incompetence. It reassured him that, at the very least, he wouldn't be the one to eat the human flesh. That was what he kept assuring himself, but his stomach grumbled at the passing thought. Yomo gave him a sideway glance.
"I've heard," Yomo begins, surprising Kaneki. "That you've been consuming meat that isn't human." He pauses, but Kaneki doesn't respond. "Considering the poor state you were in when we met in Kanou's lab, I suppose those rumours weren't baseless."
It wasn't a question, so Kaneki did not answer. His stomach grumbled again, a protest Kaneki wanted to violently suppress. It was almost mocking in its timing. Yomo glanced at him a second time.
"Yoshimura is not here anymore. There's no more 'sugar' to placate your hunger." Yomo warned, his grip tightening around the wheel. "And if you have any intentions of consuming ghoul flesh, I'll be forced to cut ties with you and keep you away from the two girls, understood?" His sudden bluntness gave Kaneki goosebumps along his arm. "It's for their own safety. You are free to do as you wish, but I won't allow that kind of danger into their lives. They've been through enough."
"I know." Kaneki licked his dry lips, his fingers loosely laced together. The tall skyscrapers of Tokyo fell away to a pastoral scenery - a stretch of greenery beyond the road barrier that gave way to rocky climbs and cliffs. The setting sun peeked out from behind the skyline of pine trees, bright sun rays beaming through the cracks between the tall, wooden bodies in the distance. The pressure of the city seemed to slip away the further they drove, despite knowing that the chain that kept them there was rattling loudly behind him, promising them their eventual return to the hellscape they call home.
"I know," Kaneki repeated with a sigh. "I don't want to do anything that will compromise the safety of you, Touka-chan, or Hinami-chan. I'll…manage, somehow."
The words hung in the air for a moment, along with an uncertainty they both detected. "It gets easier over time." Yomo added, his voice low. "You learn to accept it, like with all things in life."
The journey continued in silence after those words. Kaneki wasn't sure how he should've responded, considering everything that has happened. Easier? No, it never gets easier, you just force yourself to tolerate the pain. Even then, the pain continues to bury itself deep inside you, twisting and turning with each and every day as a reminder of the wrongs you have committed. And maybe that was for the best - to be punished with that guilt, day by day.
But that was hardly a solution and it certainly did not ease the pains of those he loved. So in the end, what did it matter, whether it was easy or not? As long as his companions were safe, he could push through the pain of any wounds or injuries. Yes, that was all that mattered, he thought. With a small crack, Kaneki pressed his thumb down onto his knuckle.
There is no reason why we have to be protected by you.
Kaneki's eyes widened and then narrowed, lowering as Touka's voice drifted through his mind.
You want nothing more than self-satisfaction.
With each reminder, Kaneki winced and he leaned his head against the cool glass of the car window. The sun was sinking away and the sky began to darken as the night approached.
Trash like you should stay out of Anteiku!
Kaneki lightly touched his cheek, remembering the strong blow of Touka's fist against his jaw. It would've knocked out any regular human, a punch like that. Fuelled with bitter spite and anguish. He had apologised to Touka earlier, but seeing her leave the way she did, he wondered what more he could do to ease the pain in her heart. He was sure that she had more to worry about than their relationship, but even so, he wanted her to know that she could rely on him. Not because he deemed himself as reliable, but because she saw him as such and trusted him enough to confide in him. Perhaps this, too, was a selfish desire that he was now projecting onto her, it was hard to say. Regardless, he would not abandon her. He refused to abandon her. Not again, not like last time. This was something he had to make up for.
The car slowed to a stop and Yomo announced their arrival. Much like the last collection point, they were parked on the side of a lone highway that was curved around a steep mountainside. Another, empty car was parked in front of them, clearly abandoned. The two left the car and waited for any other cars to pass on. Following Yomo, Kaneki leapt down from the cliff's edge, landing on the soft ground with a heavy thud.
In the past, he had panicked and dramatically tumbled to the ground. It was embarrassing, thinking back to it now. Yomo must've had the same thought, examining Kaneki with an unreadable expression before moving to the nearby corpse of a human. Kaneki bit his cheek and tried to swallow his nerves, following alongside Yomo as he placed down the duffel bag.
Yomo first removed the clothes, placing them into a separate bag. The nude corpse was remarkably pale, the skin almost a transparent white. It looked like paper, the skeleton pressing against it. Despite its gaunt appearance, it still seemed relatively 'fresh'.
"If it helps at all." Yomo said, his voice loud against the quiet of the forest. He lifted the limp arm, gripping its forearm. "See it as no different than a ghoul's corpse." With a strong tug, the arm ripped off, the skin tearing and the thick blood dripping down onto the dry leaves beneath them.
"I suppose." Kaneki murmured. But they weren't a ghoul. It was not as if he relished the sight of a corpse, regardless of whether it was a human or ghoul. Seeing human flesh, however, was a reminder that he was no longer the person he used to be, and a constant sign that he was drifting further away from that person.
In a sense, he has already lost who that person was - what once was can never be again, it was something he was reminded of again and again. Still, it was a barrier he didn't want to cross, even if it was also apparent that he had little control over the matter. Not back then and not now. He was at the whims of fate, being flung from one battle to another until he became one of the many corpses that littered the roads of Tokyo. When that moment inevitably happens, maybe someone else will feed on his corpse, just as he has done with the bodies of others. Strangers left to be consumed, a forgotten bloodstain that would soon be washed away - no different from an unmarked grave.
"Could you remove the other arm?" Yomo asked, interrupting his thoughts. Kaneki swallowed, his mouth dry, and he nodded, reaching forward.
The skin was cold, almost like ice to the touch, and stiff and heavy when held. Mimicking Yomo, he tugged the arm and with one swift movement, the flesh tore away and the tendons snapped. The aroma was…embarrassingly pleasant, like aged wine. He quickly placed the arm into the bag and then removed the upper arm, trying hard not to look at the human's face. His mouth began to water and nausea began to rise up his throat. He swallowed again, trying hard to push down the bile.
Yomo, focusing on the legs, continues to instruct Kaneki on what to do. "Twist the neck and pull, make sure to detach the spine connecting the head to the body."
Kaneki nods and reaches forward, keeping his eyes low as he grabs the head. An image flashes in his mind as his fingers touch the body's ice-cold throat. Yamori's voice rings in his ears, demanding that he make a choice, and the sight of mother and child emerges, their throats being pressed between the large arms of their captor. Their voices are weak, their breaths raspy, and their eyes fill with tears as they look at Kaneki, begging him to spare the life of the other.
His widened eyes then look to the face of the corpse, its dead eyes seemingly staring back, empty and glassy, but all the while accusatory as they silently scrutinise Kaneki. He grips his own throat, the acidic bile rising, and he stumbles back, kicking the ground beneath him as he tries to move away from the body.
With a hard blink, the body then takes the form of Hide, the bottom of his face and throat hollowed with the bite marks of a starving beast. Hide's face limply turns to him, calling for him with his pleading eyes, empty and glassy. He grunts, futilely attempting to speak, the blood spilling excessively from his wounds. Kaneki shakes his head, tasting the blood on his lips. It coats his mouth, dripping down his throat, staining his hands. It's everywhere - a reminder of what he had done, what he had chosen to do.
"No!" Kaneki screams, gripping his head. "No! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"
"Ken!" Yomo grabbed his shoulders, his voice anchoring Kaneki back down to reality. The body returned to its original appearance, its neck severed. He could no longer hear the other voices. "What's wrong?" Yomo examined him, his steely eyes giving away to concern. "What happened?"
"I was– I–" Kaneki breathed heavily, his chest rising and falling rapidly. He blinked a few times, suddenly dizzy. "I'm sorry." He leaned back, squeezing his eyes shut. "I'm sorry, I–"
"Forget about it." Yomo pulled him up onto his feet, holding him steady by his arm. "Go back to the car. I'll handle the rest."
"B-But…"
"Leave it. Just keep an eye out. I can do the rest."
With his last order, Kaneki nodded weakly and headed back to the car. A sense of defeat washed over him, along with an immense exhaustion that suddenly left his body feeling heavy and sluggish. He had wanted to be useful, but instead…
His stomach growled with a pang of hunger.
. . .
Touka fiddled with her parents' ring, the metal cool against her fingers. Silently, she read the names of her parents again and again. Arata. Hikari. Memories of her childhood trickle into her mind, remembering the warmth of her parents' hands as they walked alongside her. Their faces were…distant, vague, as if a fog was cast over them. She could remember her dad's face more clearly, especially the gentleness it carried, but her mum…she strained to remember specific details. She held the ring tightly in her hand, whispering their names, as if she were evoking her parents to appear before her. But no one would come, she knew. They were gone. Even Ayato was nowhere to be found. How long would they have to be separated before she began to forget his face?
Taking a deep breath, she tucked the ring back into her shirt. Even with her nervousness, she found the strength to get back onto her feet. Nihilism never suited her, even when it was nipping at her heels, taunting her to give in and give up. No, she wouldn't accept that. Not after everything she has been through. She had to look out for Hinami now, and she still had Yomo looking out for her. There was also Kaneki…she wanted to talk to him again. She wouldn't waste her chance next time.
Leaving the room, she noticed Hinami had fallen asleep on the sofa, her stomach sticking out. Touka smirked and pulled down her shirt, grabbing a nearby blanket and draping it over the small girl. Hinami looked comfortably peaceful when asleep, a sight Touka wished she saw more often when she was awake. No matter, Touka thought, brushing back Hinami's ruffled bangs.
There was a small knock at the door and opening it, Touka greeted Yomo, standing aside to let him inside. Shaking his head, he instead offered the duffel bag used to gather meat, along with a few dark containers for her to store the food in. Thanking Yomo, she briefly looked past his shoulder in hope that Kaneki was beside him. Seeing that he wasn't there, she tried her best not to look too disappointed. Despite her efforts, she seemed to have given something away, considering Yomo's next remark.
"I dropped off Kaneki earlier." Yomo explained, Touka nodding with some embarassment. Yomo frowned, seemingly hesitant with his next few words. "He tried to help me with the gathering, but he was deeply disturbed with the body."
Touka was silent for a moment. "Hasn't he always been like that? He freaked out the first time you took him, right?"
"He's changed a lot since then." Touka bit her lip, remembering how eerily calm he had been after seamlessly rescuing her from Ayato. "He was doing well for the first few minutes, but then…" His voice trailed off and he rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't have the wisdom or the kindness of Yoshimura and the others."
Touka nods slowly, but with the following silence, she stiffens, a brow raised. "What? You want me to talk to him?" She scoffed.
"You were once close." He retorted.
"Yeah, once." Touka muttered, crossing her arms. "But that was a while ago." She tutted, frowning and shaking her head. "I mean, what would I even say? I'm not exactly the most comforting person to be around."
"Well, it's up to you, I won't force you." He offers the slightest of smiles and turns to walk away, Touka wavering in the doorway. "I'll be back–"
"Wait!" She called, Yomo pausing and looking over his shoulder. "Hinami needs some clothes for the summer - could you take her shopping tomorrow, let her choose whatever she wants? I'll…go to the safe house and check on Kaneki." Her heart flutters and she presses her lips together. Yomo responds only with a nod and a confirmation of the time he'll arrive tomorrow. She quickly turns and then shuts the door behind her, leaning against it and heaving a big sigh. Shutting her eyes, she feels her heartbeat against her chest.
"He's never been this talkative before." She mutters, brushing her bangs back. "I guess it's not so bad…"
. . .
Kaneki laid in his bed, the covers pulled over his head so that he was in complete darkness. He hadn't slept much since yesterday evening, his mind rattled with too many anxious thoughts for him to rest comfortably. Yomo had offered him a coffee this morning - his own way of checking in on him, Kaneki supposed, or maybe he was going to pretend nothing had happened to save them the awkwardness of it all. Either way, Kaneki gently turned down his offer, giving the excuse that his head was hurting and that he just needed to rest some more. Yomo chose not to refute him and left soon afterwards. Kaneki was relieved and spent the rest of the morning in bed. He probably could've confided in Yomo, he thought, but he has always found solitude preferable during these moments.
No, that wasn't true. The truth was that with solitude came a creeping sense of isolation, a fear that he was truly alone with no one around to save him from loneliness he was being subjected to. When he was younger, Hide had reached out and drawn him away from this darkness, pulling him into a comforting lightness he hasn't known since.
Everything was different as a ghoul; the darkness he feared came with it the threat of death. He had been lucky enough to befriend those that would save him when necessary, though he knew that they, too, were skirting the line between life and death for his sake. He couldn't allow it, not if he could help it. And so he was forced to face this darkness alone, bringing with it a new fear that he'll endanger anyone else that tries to reach out to save him.
Knowing this, he cringed and twisted the sheets around him, gritting his teeth. If he truly understood this, why does he repeat the same mistakes? It was a thought that continued to cut through his mind, a voice in his ears whispering the accusatory "coward" with the familiar chittering of a squirming insect. An equation he didn't want to answer. He pressed his palms against his ears, shaking his head. He couldn't change the past, he wanted to say, but it continued to haunt him in the present. Like shackles on his wrists, like a noose around his neck, he couldn't escape. Not unless–
"Kaneki?" There was a knock on the door, along with Touka's familiar voice. He flinched and sat up, all intrusive thoughts ceasing their incessant noise. "Are you in?" She knocked again and he struggled to find the words to respond, as if he were in a dazed state. He hadn't been expecting her. "God dammit, will you just…"
She kicked the door open, causing Kaneki to jump in surprise and a little bit of fear. He couldn't recall if the door had actually been locked, but either way, it was a surprise to see such an aggressive response. Then again, it was a reaction he should've expected from Touka. She stepped in and gave him a judging look.
"It's noon, you know." Touka remarked, crossing her arms. "You look like shit."
Flustered, Kaneki rose from his bed and brushed through his messy hair with his fingers. He was suddenly conscious of how he looked - his wrinkled shirt and shorts, his pale complexion, his tired eyes. He felt almost exposed with Touka’s intrusion, though he would be lying if he said that it was entirely unwelcome. With her presence, his mind settled into a much-needed quietness, pushing aside all the horrible thoughts that kept him in a state of constant restlessness. Even so, he was still taken aback by her sudden visit.
“W-What are you doing here? Is Yomo here?” He asked, clearing his throat. Touka's lips parted, as if she were about to say something, but she sighed and shook her head. “What is it?”
“Nothing, I just…” Touka squinted, her eyes meeting his. "It's fine." She shook her head again. “Anyway, Yomo is with Hinami. I asked him to get some clothes for her.”
“Oh, I see.”
“Yeah.” She fiddled with her fringe, brushing it over her eye. Feeling something akin to defeat, Kaneki pushed the conversation forward.
“Is there something you need?” Kaneki meant nothing offensive with his question, but it was enough to make Touka twist her lips and frown.
“Is there a reason I can’t visit a friend?” She asked, evidently unimpressed.
“N-No.” Kaneki turned his face away, rubbing the back of his neck. “Wait, are we friends?”
“Do you want me to kill you?!” She asked with an immediate aggressiveness. Kaneki shook his head quickly, stuttering out an explanation. Touka let out a frustrated sigh and turned back towards the door. “Come on. I’ll make you some coffee.”
Confused, but uneager to incite her fury any further, Kaneki followed behind her to the small kitchen outside of his bedroom. Silently, she boiled some water and crushed the fresh beans that Yomo had stored away. Her movements flowed with a satisfying smoothness that Kaneki enjoyed watching, though with it came a pang of painful nostalgia that crept in the back of his mind. With Touka, however, it was easier to ignore the memories that intruded his mind. A light piercing through the darkness
“Are you familiar with this hideout?” Kaneki asked, continuing to watch Touka while she prepared two cups of coffee.
“Sure.” Touka answered. She poured the hot water over the crushed beans, slowly moving the kettle in a circle, just as they had both been taught. “I stayed here with Hinami for a few days before Yomo found you.”
“I see…” Touka placed a cup in front of him and sat opposite, the aroma of freshly made coffee drifting through the room. “I suppose that it was…probably good that he found me.”
“Probably?” Touka raised a brow. Kaneki pressed his lips together, gnawing on the inside of his bottom lip.
“I’ve caused a lot of trouble.” His voice was quiet, yet unhesitant. Touka winced, cupping her hands around her coffee. “Sometimes, I wonder if it would have been better if I had been left behind to die.”
He wasn’t sure what prompted him to admit these feelings to Touka - it wasn’t as if she had pushed him to confess his doubts. But seeing her here, sitting across from him and watching him with her beautiful, dark eyes, he felt compelled to share these thoughts with her. It was perplexing. Perhaps, after all that has happened, he was aware of how precious their time was together. He had already apologised to her, though there was a part of him that was unsatisfied, that wanted to assure her that his words were truly sincere. Maybe that was why these barriers that always kept her and others at a distance were finally being toppled, even if it was just for a brief moment. That was what he wanted to believe, in any case.
After letting his words hang in the air, sinking into her skin and sending goosebumps down her spine, Touka took a few sips of her coffee and placed the mug aside. “I…” She hesitated and looked away, her shoulders hunched. “I’ve also felt that way before.”
Kaneki was now looking at her directly, not entirely surprised, but still startled by her own confession. Unable to respond, Kaneki frowned and looked down into his coffee, seeing a dark, warped reflection staring back. Touka peered back, noticing his pained expression.
“I have always wanted to protect you.” Kaneki admitted, feeling the almost burning warmth of his coffee mug seeping into his hands. “I wanted to keep you away, in hopes that maybe then, you would be safe. Pursue an education, live a normal life.” He sighed. “Be happy.” He took a drink of the coffee, the delicious taste almost bittersweet against his tongue. “But I wasn’t able to do anything. In the end, I wasn’t able to protect you all. I'm always making things worse–”
“Don’t give me that.” Touka scowled, slamming her fist down against the table and startling him. “I’ve told you before that we don’t need you to protect us. We’ve been living this life longer than you ever have. We don’t need you to ‘save us’.” Kaneki’s eyes met hers once again, the kind warmth he saw before now replaced with a cold glare of contempt. “Can’t you see,” she bowed her head, her fist trembling. “You’re the one that needs to be kept safe. These past few months - all you’ve done is run into danger, again and again, and for what?” Lifting her head again, Kaneki’s eyes widened, watching tears roll down Touka’s flushed cheeks. “I don’t want you to die, shitty-neki. Why can’t you understand that? And you– You abandoned me anyway. You ran off to die, thinking that I'd be okay with it. I can't stand it.” Sniffing, her voice became a murmur. “Forget it, this was a mistake.”
Pushing her chair back, the legs scraping against the ground, she abruptly stood from her seat and rushed towards the door. Before she could leave, however, Kaneki grabbed her wrist, holding her back. Her skin was warm against his cold palm.
“Let go! I shouldn’t have–”
He tugged her back, grabbing her by the shoulders and she looked up to him, her eyes glazed with tears and wide with anxious worry. He gazes back down with calm, grey eyes, his pupils dilated. Looking into her eyes, he was constrained with conflicting thoughts, unsure what it was he should do. He wanted to comfort her, but how could he when he was the one causing her so much grief? Was it right for him to keep her here, to hold her back after her pained confession? Would it be wrong to let her go? What was the right thing to do? He wasn't certain, but what he did know was that he wanted to prove to her somehow that he would not leave her side again, if that was truly what she wanted.
They were both breathing heavily, their hearts loud in their ears. He moves his hands from her shoulders to her cheeks, his thumb brushing away the tears from her eyes. If only it were that easy to ease her pain, he thinks. Her eyes flutter shut, and it almost feels like she could fall apart in his hold - a tenderness she hasn’t known in so long.
“I’m sorry.” Kaneki whispers, kissing her forehead. “I’m sorry.” He then kisses her eyelids, his lips brushing lightly against her skin. “I’m sorry.” He moves his lips down to hers, their breaths intermingling. “I’m–”
Grabbing his shirt, Touka pulls him against her, their lips pressed together. Her mind goes blank for a moment, with nothing but the sound of her racing heart and the feeling of his lips against hers encapsulating her thoughts.There’s a sudden impulse for her to pull back, but Kaneki moves his hands to her waist, keeping her in place as he moves his lips against hers. With a small moan, he parts her lips with his tongue and she responds in kind, opening her lips for him and feeling his tongue move over hers. His hands squeezed her waist, twisting against the fabric of her shirt before pulling her body against his, making Touka gasp in response. His body was firm with toned muscles, his strong arms wrapping around her, as if locking her to his side. And all the while, her mind goes hazy at the sensation of their breathless kisses, her cheeks warm with the sensual intensity of it all.
But then he pulls back with a gasp, as if woken from a dream. He moved his hands back to her shoulders, his grip firm, and he bowed his head, his cheeks smeared with a red blush. With a slight shake of his head, he takes a deep breath.
"I'm sorry, that wasn't–" He tried to explain, stammering over his words. He looked up, with an almost pleading look in his eyes. "It wasn't my intention to–"
"It's fine." Touka mumbled, hiding her face with the back of her hand. She refused to look at him directly, her eyes darting between him and their surroundings. "It was…" She squeezed her eyes shut, her voice no more than a squeak. "I need to go."
Before Kaneki could stop her again, she darts through the door. Kaneki, left with nothing but the coffee she made for him moments before, tilts his head back, shutting his eyes and thinking through the moment they had just shared together. Her skin had been so soft, her lips tender against his, her movements shy and hesitant. It was so different from Touka's usual mannerisms, revealing to him a vulnerability he had hardly seen before. And there's a part of him that wanted to see that side of her again, to dig deeper and see what else there was to discover.
A little ashamed and embarrassed by these desires, he sat back down and rested his head against the table. He shouldn't be thinking of Touka this way. Before today, he wasn't even sure if Touka was willing to be friends with him after all they've been through. And within the span of a few minutes, the intimacy between them surpassed anything he could've ever anticipated. Even now, as he tried to think past the kiss they shared, his thoughts kept returning to the feel of her body - petite, but soft, his hands fitting nicely against the smooth curve of her hip. Her chest against him. He groaned, pressing his palms against his thighs. Was he allowed to have these thoughts, to think of Touka this way? He moved his hand to the waistband of his shorts, agonised by this inner conflict. He couldn't deny it, though. He wanted to feel her, to touch her, to hold her, to kiss her, to undress her, to caress her.
He wanted more.
. . .
Touka sat on her bed, hugging her knees. She still felt warm after her visit to see Kaneki. She leaned her head against her knees, grimacing. It hadn't been her intention to dump her feelings on him, much less kiss him. But he had reciprocated, right? Had he wanted to kiss her in the first place? Surely he must've, she thought with some worry. She tried to reason with herself, but each time she thought back to that moment, she wanted to cry out with embarrassment and bury herself deep into the ground.
In the end, had she really conveyed what it was she wanted to tell him? After their fight on the bridge, she had decided that she would apologise and be more mature in her response. Instead, her anger escalated once again and she started crying. Was she ever going to learn from her mistakes? She wanted someone to yell at her, to punish her for her immaturity. The last thing she had anticipated was an intense kiss with her…
She shook her head, agonising over the thought of it all. It would be a lie if she said she hated it - it was just unexpected. What was Kaneki thinking now, she wondered with an anxious uncertainty. It was all so confusing and it was impossible for her to know how to proceed from this point forward. If he had hated it, she continued to ponder, then he'd probably keep his distance. Even if he had, just maybe, possibly, enjoyed it, he would likely keep some kind of distance anyway. If he had enjoyed it, Touka thought while covering her face, would that make the situation any better?
Touka shook her head again, rolling onto her stomach and burying her face into her pillow. This was hardly the time to worry about something so…childish. Still, it weighed against her mind and the memory of the moment continued to intrude into her thoughts, as if it were a punishing reminder of what had happened. It was distracting, the thought of his body as she pressed her hands against his chest, the slight moan that escaped his lips…it was all too distracting!
She just hoped that she could calm herself down by the time Hinami returned from her trip with Yomo. The last thing she needed was others questioning their…confusing relationship, to put it simply.
In any case, that was the last time she was going to visit Kaneki alone, she decided. Touka knew, however, that this was not a promise she could keep.
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Genuine In Love.
Ayato Kirishima x Reader
Request: I need more Ayato Kirishima fics, there simply is not enough in the world! 😩 How about a beach day/pool party theme? Bonus points if you add birthday boy Ayato, even tho his bday was the 4th im still celebrating him all month 🎉 thank you!
Warning: fluff, slight smut, unprotected sex, creampie, blowjob, hurt/comfort, ayato gets a bit emotional but is also embarrassed.
A/N: i hope you liked it! i absolutely agree in celebrating him for the rest of the month!! sorry for taking time but i just graduated so I was out of it and celebrating the last few days! lol i hope i made justice to your request and thank you for sending it. This is already my third fic for him lol
Masterlist - Masterpost
4th of July.
The date that you had been waiting for the most this year. That being the date of birth of your boyfriend of almost two years.
Last time he had downplayed it, you two had passed the day home and he only responded via text the few congratulations he had gotten. You weren't sure on what to do then if not to comply to his wishes.
You knew that after the war, he had started to open up and appreciate being around other people, you'd see how he'd smile more often or even bickered in a positive way with Nishiki and his own sister till both parties were laughing or at least smiling.
It had always been hard for him to behave as if nothing had happened between your current friends and him. He was on the opposite side a few times, hurting them, saying things that at the time were only built upon anger and grief from his parents' loss.
The last well done birthday for him was exactly then, when his parents were still alive and Touka was still beside him, memories that faded and left a stabbing sensation in his heart at the mere thought.
But people change, and in the last few years, he had become a dependable person, one that redeemed and decided to follow his heart and mind when being with a person, to control his anger, short temper and grief and direct those or wear them out in a healthy way.
That never stopped the filling void he had and the guilt and shame as well. Even though everyone recognized him and loved him openly, he, and you could only assume through his actions, felt like he didn't deserve it.
So, for this time, you truly wanted him to show that there were more people in his life that would love him and appreciate him, that had left the past behind and started anew.
You struggled to get him to get adjusted to your plans, he was protesting on the trip to the house beach you rented, as he said that it wasn't necessary to spend money on him or his birthday since it was just any other day for him.
It started with some well received greetings in the morning, whispering and singing happy birthday to him as you crawled on top of him, waking him up with breakfast ready in the kitchen, wearing a sheer robe and white lingerie, that were soon discarted on the ground.
His hands were all over you, his lips attacking your skin as you made sure to do all the work for him today, lips wrapping around his shaft, your tongue licking the tip as he groaned and grunted in pleasure, repeating your name over and over, with his fingers brushing and gripping your hair.
After the seed was swallowed, the morning wood was still there, with him wearing a little smirk as he watched you line up with him, rubbing the tip through your wet folds before sinking down on him, both of you gasping at the fullness and tightness of it all.
It was a quick round that made Ayato look forward to his own birthday this year with you. You were all he needed but seeing you try for him and initiating was comforting, knowing that he couldn't do that so easily.
With breakfast done completely, you told him to get the two bags on the couch and guided him to the car. It was weird for you to drive, roles had switched but it is what is in this case, you knew the destination while he didn't.
"You still could have put the address in the GPS and I could have driven us. You barely reached the pedal, you midget, we'll crash if you don't stop sitting criss cross on the seat." He was deadpan, his comments always made you chuckle or laugh.
Most of the time, it seemed like intrusive thoughts that were said out loud for no reason.
The annoyance your boyfriend had was real, but so was the hand rubbing up and down your thigh as you drove, warming you up and contradicting any of the words he said.
"I do reach the pedals, but still, today you'll be courted, act like the celebrity and I'm your body guard." You said, looking directly at him with a smile.
His fingers smushed your cheeks turning you to the road in front of you. "Look at the front. We are really going to crash."
It was an hour long drive to get to the house, time spent on the infinite rants Ayato had about everything he could think of and your endless amount of news and gossip that he would pleasantly comment on.
He could be a bit of a loose mouth when he got comfortable, that's what you understood and got a few months into dating him.
"Here we are, A-ya-to!" You said arms up, pointing at the house in front of you while he took the two bags from the backseat.
"Don't say my name in slow motion." He leaned down to kiss your lips once. "This is a lot though, thank you."
You hummed at him with a huge grin. Your hand took his, intertwining your fingers with his as you both entered the house, silence and peace, a smell of fresh air and the sound of ocean waves reaching from the open window doors on the other side.
"The master bedroom is upstairs, the one in front of the stairs, change and meet me here, there's a few more surprises for you." His eyebrows furrowed, looking at you suspiciously. "Just trust me." You kissed him, patting his shoulder as if to say him 'go, come on'.
"That's a lot to ask." He grumbled but nonetheless followed your orders.
Ayato couldn't seem to fully sink in the fact that you were in fact his girlfriend and loved him so much to do all of this for him. He was aware that he was a lot, that his behavior wasn't the best thing in the world, people around him had told him the same, but you seemed to see and bring out a side he didn't even know he had.
Sometimes he wondered if you did this out of pity or whatever it could be, that you were there just for some time, after all everyone left him at some point.
And more than anything he was ghoul, you weren't.
You were an angel fallen from the sky for him, to counter him completely, from his ghoul entity to his way of loving and appreciating.
As he came down the stairs, his heart started beating a slight tad bit faster, imagining what kind of surprises you could still have in your hands, how much more you had to make his head going over heels in doubts and overthinking.
"Yato, put this on." You walked to him with a blindfold in your hands, rather than a request you were already on your toes tying it up around his head. "Can you see anything?" You moved your hand in front of him.
"I see the dark, (Y/N)."
"That's good enough." You said, same energy to his sarcasm. You took his hand in yours and acted as his guide, at one point Ayato felt nervous, feeling the hot sand under his feet and the crashing of the waves getting louder.
He could tell that you were doing something, mouthing something to someone as his sharp senses caught the little breaths and gasps.
He heard you clear your throat, your hands going up to his chest to stop him, walking around him so your arms wrapped around his waist and your forehead rested on his back.
"You see, I want you to know a few things. From the bottom of my heart.
I admire the person you have become during these years, you have changed, grown and matured... you're the best person I know, I love that about you...
But some times I feel like you're too hard on yourself, you tend to minimize yourself to others, even when everyone else just wants the best for you and to see you happy.
I want you to know that you will never have to feel alone, you will never have to worry about that, I promised that I'll never go anywhere and that's why I want to make you as happy as I can, because I am desperately in love with you... and we all love you..." His blindfold fell.
His heart beat as fast as light, when his eyes met everyone standing there smiling it made it stop, eyes widening. "Happy birthday Ayato!"
Everyone cheered, stepping forward, approaching him and hugging him, patting him, ruffling his hair all so affectionate, making him feel loved and wanted, there was a knot in his throat as he hugged back his own sister, whispering him to him the same few insults she used for him with a sweet voice laced with care. He could only chuckle to not...
His brother in law going up to him as well, holding the little Ichika on his hip. Ayato's jaw clenched as he listened to his little niece saying she loved him, Kaneki wishing him the best, Yomo doing the same.
And as the greetings were over, he could only look back at you, his bangs falling down to his eyes, he moved in automatic when he saw your arms opening up.
His face hidden in the crook of your neck, holding you tight and close to him, there was no other place like your hold and embrace.
He took a few minutes, making sure that the knot in his throat had completely disappeared and the stinging sensation in his eyes was gone before pulling away from you, somewhat still holding in you place by your waist. "I'm not good with words."
"No, you are not. At all." You replied to him, keeping your laugh in at the surging annoyance for ruining his emotional moment. "It's good that way, I love you no matter what."
Your smile morphed in shock when you felt his hand going to grab you by your jaw and crashing your lips with his, he was not one to initiate, in front of all these people even less but you still melted into it, you melted in his arms and lips.
"I love you too... a lot." He mumbled, he could now see in your eyes, there was no pity, no remorse, no sadness, there was just love and admiration, you were genuinely in love with him somehow.
He smiled a little, seeing your face brightened up at his words, a squeal coming from his niece stealing both of your attention.
"Well, I spent a lot of time planning preparing this beach birthday party for you, there's food and a cake that even ghouls can eat, and I expect you to eat it all. I want you to have fun with everyone, all of us look forward to spend time with you, so your schedule is busy birthday boy." You emitted contagious happiness to him, his lips curving into a smile.
"I thought we were going to have the beach to ourselves though." He said in a bit of confusion.
"We packed for a week, they're staying here for a day. Don't worry about that. Let's celebrate you with our family, shall we?" When he took your hand, he knew that you and him were in for life, you could guide him through hell and he'd follow you.
You'd do the same.
That's what love does.
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Here’s my work for the Tokyo Ghoul pair up event!
I got paired up with the talented @succulent-mud
We chose to do a father daughter piece. This was so much fun to do!
Alright. Here we go!
Today was supposed to be a quiet day. A nice quiet day to himself, Kaneki thought. On Sundays they all would go to the store to buy groceries for the week, but since they decided to go a day early due to a sale, it was basically a free day. Touka had gotten an invitation from Yoriko to spend the day together at the park with their children. Kaneki had asked her if she wanted him to tag along, but Touka said no. She said it had been a while since she and Yoriko spent time together alone. Kaneki thought it was a little weird to say it like that since they would have the kids, but he knew what she meant.
Going down the stairs of his home, Kaneki saw his pregnant wife right before she was about to leave. Yet he noticed that their daughter, Ichika, was missing from her side.
“Touka?”
“Good morning. Did I wake you?”
“No. Are you leaving?”
Touka nodded. “Yeah. I wanted to get there early so that I have some time to talk to her before she gets more occupied with the baby. You know how it is.” Touka chuckled a little as she spoke.
So did Kaneki. “Yeah I suppose so. Where’s Ichika? Is she still getting ready?”, he asked.
Touka scratched at her head. “Ah well you see about that…” Kaneki’s eyes widened just a little bit. Was something wrong? Did Ichika fall ill? “I tried to wake her up, but she wouldn’t budge. She insisted that she wanted to stay home.”
“Oh really? She insisted?”
“Well more like she gave me the biggest grumpy face ever and then hid under the blanket.” Touka sighed. “I’m sorry. Usually I would’ve been able to handle it better, but as you can see,” Touka pointed to her baby bump, “I don’t think this little one would have made it easy.”
Kaneki just laughed it off. “It’s alright. I’ll spend the day with her.”
“Are you sure? I know you were excited to have the day to yourself. Maybe you can just get her ready real quick and then we’ll be on our way.”
“No no. It’s fine. I’m her father after all. It’s my job to take care of her.”
Touka’s eyes softened. “Kaneki… I”, yet before she could finish, she had a look at the clock and gasped. “Ah shoot! I’m late! So sorry, but I have to get going. I’ll see you guys later, okay”, Touka said as she already put one foot out the door.
Kaneki waved to her as she left. “Yes. We’ll see you later.”
As the door shut, leaving Kaneki all alone in the living room, the man pondered. Now what? His plans for relaxing were out the window now. Ichika was a pretty active kid and always kept everybody on their toes. Kaneki decided that it would be best to just wake her and go from there. Before he could take a step, he heard little footsteps coming downstairs. Yet when he turned his head around there was no one there. Now he heard the steps coming from the kitchen.
Perhaps she’s trying to hide from me, Kaneki thought.
Going into the kitchen, Kaneki spotted Ichika pulling a chair towards the pantry. He almost wanted to laugh at the little grunts she was making. Poor thing. The chair must be so heavy for her.
“What are you doing?”
“Hungry.”
“You’re hungry? Okay. What do you want to eat?”
“I’ll do it!”
“Do you want me to get it for you?” As he took a step closer to her, Ichika let go of the chair and began pushing Kaneki away.
“No no! I’m gonna do it! No!”
“Alright alright”, Kaneki said as she kept pushing him. Looks like she was in a mood. It reminded him of Touka and, oddly enough, Hide. Once she got him out of the kitchen, Ichika went back and started pulling the chair again. When Kaneki went to look at what she was doing again, Ichika got mad.
“Papa no! Go!”
“Oh? I can’t watch?”
“No!”
“Okay okay”, Kaneki said as he put his hands up. He pretended to walk further away when he turned the corner. Once he heard her moving again, he figured it would be a good time to spy on her. Peeking into the kitchen, Kaneki saw that Ichika had climbed the chair to grab a bag of flour from the pantry. However, the bag she was grabbing was too heavy for her small arms so it quickly fell onto her, creating a cloud of flour.
“Ichika!” Kaneki swiftly made his way towards his daughter checking if she had any injuries. “Are you okay?” He saw her nod, but heard her trying to hold back little whimpers. “Look at that”, he said pointing to the top of her head. Her dark roots were covered by the flour. “You look just like me.” Kaneki smiled when Ichika laughed. She seemed to be just fine. After all, Ichika was always quick to bounce back.
After dusting her off Kaneki went to go get the broom and dustpan. Coming back, he saw Ichika trying to get something from the pantry again.
“What are you getting now?”
“Eggs.”
“Eggs? What for?”
“Pancakes. I wanna make pancakes like from the cafe.”
“Oh.” Kaneki remembered the cafe they would all go to. Ever since Ichika was a toddler, she loved eating the fluffy pancakes from there. Before he swept up the flour on the floor, Kaneki picked up the bag and placed it onto the counter.
“The eggs are in the refrigerator. They’re too high for you to get so I’ll help get them.”
Ichika was now watching Kaneki as he swept.
“Papa knows how to make pancakes?”
“Yes.”
“But papa can’t eat food like me.”
“Just because I can’t eat it, doesn’t mean I can’t cook.” Ichika seemed so stunned at the information, Kaneki couldn’t help but chuckle. As soon as the floor was clean, he put on an apron.
“Get ready Ichika because you’re about to witness a cooking papa!”
Seeing her normally mild mannered father have so much confidence made Ichika giddy with excitement.
Approaching the pantry, Kaneki pulled out a small box of baking soda.
“Go put this next to the flour.”
“Okay!” The small child nearly leapt off from the chair as she went to go do as she was told.
“And once you do that, go grab your little stool.”
“Yes!” As she ran off, Kaneki took this time to get the remaining ingredients.
Bringing back the stool was no problem for her. It was a lot lighter than the big chairs they had. When Ichika came back, she saw an array of ingredients on the counter. She quickly set the stool down in place and stood on it to get a better look.
“Are you ready?” Kaneki asked.
“Yes papa.”
“Alright.” Kaneki reached over and rolled up Ichika’s sleeves before doing the same for himself. “This is so we don’t get dirty.” He saw her nod and try to roll them up even more.
“Okay. First, let’s combine our dry ingredients.”
Ichika looked puzzled. Kaneki wondered why, but then it dawned on him that she was five. She didn’t really understand what dry ingredients were yet. “Oh. Um, we have to put these into a bowl.” Kaneki then pointed to the flour, salt, sugar, baking powder and baking soda.
“Oh okay.” Ichika grabbed the bag of flour and tipped it over so that it could go into the bowl. Kaneki was able to stop it from falling again, but some still spilled out.
“Not that much. We only need two cups.”
“But I can’t reach the cups.”
“Not those ones.” Rummaging through one of the drawers, he pulled out some measuring cups and spoons. “Use this one. Remember. Only two.” Kaneki watched Ichika as she counted while collecting and pouring the flour.
“Good job! Now use this one for the sugar.” He then gave her a smaller cup.
“How many?” Ichika asked, nervous that she was going to mess up.
“Just one”, Kaneki said as he put a finger up.
Once she had finished that, he decided that he should handle the measuring spoons since they were so little. Ichika didn’t really like that idea so she tried to take the spoons from Kaneki’s hand. She was unsuccessful and only managed to spill some of the powder.
“Alright. Let’s stir the bowl.” Giving her a whisk, Kaneki told her to do it gently. “We don’t want it flying out.”
Now that the dry ingredients were all mixed, it was time for the wet ingredients and Kaneki was a bit nervous to say the least. Cleaning up powder was one thing. This, however, could end in catastrophe. He had already melted the butter. All she had to do was put it in the bowl.
“Here’s the other bowl. Put the butter in here.” Doing as she was told, Ichika noticed her father was starting to pour milk into one of the measuring cups.
“I wanna do it!”
Before he could stop her, it was already too late. The way she had lunged for the cup made his grip on the milk slip so it fell. Over half of it had spilled out getting all over the counter and dripping onto the floor. Luckily, he had already gotten the amount he needed.
“Sorry…” Ichika had a guilty look on her face. The look that would make everyone melt.
“It’s alright. We’ll clean it up before mama gets home”, said Kaneki. Him and Touka were used to the messes. “Here. Help me with the vanilla.”
“Ice cream?”
“No no. It’s a mixture. We’re gonna put it in the bowl.” He handed Ichika one of the measuring spoons. “I’ll pour and you put it in.” Ichika nodded happily. Once they had done it twice, Kaneki grabbed the one egg and cracked it into the bowl. Ichika didn’t make a fuss about it. He supposed that she knew cracking eggs would be too hard for her to do by herself.
“Okay. Now mix this one too.” Kaneki had forgotten to tell her to do it gently, but he saw that he didn’t need to. Ichika was being careful. It made him feel a bit of pride seeing that she remembered.
She really has grown up, Kaneki thought. It seemed like just yesterday when she could barely hold a spoon.
“Do we make pancakes now?” Asked Ichika.
Kaneki smiled. “Not just yet. We have to combine the bowls now.” He then poured the bowl full of the wet ingredients into the bowl with the dry ingredients. “Now we have to mix it again. Make sure it’s mixed together really well.”
“Okay.” When Ichika started mixing, she noticed it was a bit harder than the previous times. So she began to use more force as she stirred. And when that didn’t feel like enough, she put even more force into it. At that point, her sleeves had unrolled themselves. Pretty soon, there was batter splashing out. Kaneki decided to not say anything. She was still a child. Let her have fun and get a little messy. He only stopped her when the stool beneath her started to shake.
“Ha ha! Look papa!” Ichika raised the bowl to show him. “I did it! I mixed it!”
“Fantastic job Ichika!” Kaneki clapped as Ichika did a little dance with the bowl. “Okay. Now we can make the pancakes.” He grabbed the bowl from her and set it down. Grabbing a pan, Kaneki looked over at Ichika. “I have to do this part because it involves the stove. How about you go wash your hands?”
Ichika nodded and left the room. Kaneki looked over at the mess that was made. He sighed.
When Ichika came back she decided to grab a fork before sitting down to wait. She watched her father intently as he began flipping the pancakes.
“Some of these will be for mama so remember to leave some for her.”
“Yes papa.”
Once he was done, Kaneki stacked some on a plate and gave it to an eager Ichika. As he was doing so, he could’ve sworn he could hear a faint ‘pancakes! pancakes! pancakes!’ coming from her.
He watched as she took a bite. “So how is it?” He asked.
Ichika smiled brightly. “So yummy! Even though they aren’t fluffy.”
Kaneki felt like there was glass shattering. She had asked for fluffy pancakes. They just made regular ones. His face became so gloomy that Ichika started to panic.
“Papa no! They’re very good! I like them a lot! Can I have more?”
“It’s alright Ichika.” Kaneki said with a defeated smile. “I’ll learn how to make it for you.”
The end
:) I hope you all enjoyed! Be sure to check out the wonderful artwork done by @succulent-mud !
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Twisted Wound
For @exulzae for the @tgpairup event! They wanted AyaKane, and I did my best! Enjoy :]
Aogiri was supposed to be colder than Anteiku.
Kaneki expected that much; the only warmth provided in Yamori’s playroom had been the sweat from his own brow, the blood spilling from his fingers and toes, and the heaving breath of the man himself as he grappled with killing Kaneki on the spot. A foolish mistake, in hindsight— now he was going to be another weapon of the Doves, like so many before him.
As a replacement, Kaneki assumed many of his responsibilities— chief among them being convening with the other executives.
All were cold in their own way— Noro was tall and silent, roaming the halls like a zombie. Accompanying him at all times was Eto, a childish— thus dangerous— mystery who always seemed to be watching Kaneki when he wasn’t looking. There was Naki, the new White Suits leader, who was overly emotional and unstable. And then Tatara always glared at Kaneki when he spoke up, as though he knew Kaneki’s true purpose, despite that being impossible.
In a way, it was good. Kaneki truly felt nothing towards these ghouls— these monsters— and counted to himself the days until their demise. He would consume them once they became useless, and he would climb on their corpses to the pinnacle of strength, upon which he would finally be able to protect what mattered to him.
But then there was Ayato. Touka’s younger brother, and a roaring fire amidst the cold. He was a lot like his sister, much as he likely didn’t want to admit: strong-willed, and a face full of swears and glares for anyone disagreeable. It should be easy to hate someone like that; those were the types that pushed people away and ended up all alone because of it.
If that were true, then it must have been the burden of nostalgia on Kaneki’s shoulders, because he found himself hesitating. Bringing down Aogiri meant confronting Ayato again, meant grappling with the choice he’d made in the 11th ward. It meant questioning his actions in that checkerboarded room, and rendering them meaningless.
And then it happened. Kaneki hadn’t been sent out to exterminate ghouls for a while, and he felt the pangs of hunger clawing at the walls of his stomach. The monster inside him craved sustenance, but his sense of justice and heroism demanded only one type of food— villains. And yet, the powers that be demanded he bide his time, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. He had to feign loyalty to Aogiri lest they catch onto his plan, and a true predator knew when to keep his claws beneath his cloak.
In a show of what must have been amused pity, Eto had suggested to Tatara that Kaneki accompany Ayato’s squad to a 15th ward raid. However, there were no ghouls, like Kaneki anticipated— they were going to attack a Dove’s nest.
Humans.
He knew this day would come eventually; it was just the consequence of working with ghouls. Humans would be attacked. Humans would be killed. But Kaneki, a former human, hunting his old kind— it stilled him. He knew how fragile they could be, how much easier they crumbled compared to ghouls. That was what Yamori had taught him.
Yet, when Ayato recklessly charged ahead and got stabbed by two hooks of a strange quinque, Kaneki almost thought he was just another human. The way Ayato crumbled when his ribs shattered like glass— Kaneki acted before he realized it. His kagune, grafted onto him like a broken branch onto a foreign tree, spilled forth wilder than anything before.
Two appendages around Ayato, and two through the Dove that did it.
Blood, human blood, spilled over Kaneki’s implanted organ, and the intoxicating smell of raw meat. He had always resisted the temptation, and the heat of battle always made it difficult. But Ayato needed attention now, and Kaneki used that to push him forward.
He ran as fast and as far as he could, far behind the front lines. It went against all of his logic, all of his choices, all of his resolve. If he had woven a tapestry in which he styled himself the hero, this slashed a knife through it and turned it into scraps on the floor.
He could feel the confusion from the others; the Eyepatch hadn’t established a habit of retreating, and Ayato hadn’t established a habit of being protected. But battle was battle, and there wasn’t enough time to consider it.
A few buildings later, once the screams of combat were silent memories, Ayato stirred. “Shit…” he muttered. “Take me back, half-ass.”
“You’re injured.”
“Yeah, obviously!” As he said it, he hissed in pain. “Shit…! Look, if you let me feed, I won’t be injured!”
“How will you feed if you can barely stand?” Kaneki countered.
“You don’t know shit, half-ass. I need to eat.”
“You need rest. I’ll figure something out.”
“And what do you know about what I need, huh?!” With a forceful shove, Ayato tumbled out of Kaneki’s grip and clambered to his feet. He clutched his wound, but neither his words nor his scowl were any less vicious for it. “Prancin’ about and actin’ like you’re better than anyone, just cuz you beat Yamori or whatever…!”
Kaneki stood at a distance, watching Ayato struggle with the injury he was ignoring. He’d been observing Ayato’s feeding habits, and it was clear he didn’t cannibalize. He was floundering about in the world of ghouls, yet he refused to steal from them. That was what they were built to do, after all. But if he didn’t eat something soon, then—
“Why’re you even here, anyway?” There was a wall for Ayato to sink down against. “You kill shitty Doves, but you only eat when it’s other ghouls… It’s stupid; they taste disgusting.”
Kaneki said nothing. It was true, to an extent, but there was a limit to one’s base instincts. He had to overcome them, ascend past the sheep and become a shepherd, so that he might pick the ones most suitable for slaughter.
“You ain’t in Fantasy Caféland anymore,” Ayato continued. “We’re ghouls, Eyepatch. We eat humans, not each other.”
Kaneki stepped toward him, deciding to entertain the boy. “If you’re picky about what you eat, you’ll never become strong; those you care about will slip through your fingers like sand.”
“And who said I cared about anyone?” Ayato fired back. “I only need me, myself, and I… That’s how ghouls operate, you bastard. We can only count on ourselves.”
“What about Touka, then?” Kaneki squatted down to his level.
He clicked his tongue. “What about her?”
“You could have killed her back in Anteiku or in the 11th ward, yet you didn’t. You let her live.”
When Ayato didn’t respond, Kaneki knew he hit the nail on the head.
“You’re protecting someone, just like I am. Killing Doves en masse won’t solve anything; battle experience only gets you so far. You must be able to expand your limits, too. And to do that, you must eat. You must feed.”
He grabbed Ayato by the shirt collar.
“Like this.”
In one swift motion, he lunged forth and sunk his teeth into Ayato’s shoulder. Ayato hissed. “What the fuck are you doing?!” he yelled.
“Teaching you a lesson.” Kaneki stood up, wiping the blood off his mouth. The taste was still the same, like spoiled goods that no chef could salvage. It was the foulest trash one could consume. “You said you needed to eat, and if you don’t, you’ll die. So show me your resolve.”
Ayato clutched his shoulder, glaring. “Bastard…”
“Calling me names won’t fill your belly.” Kaneki balled up his fists and shifted into a fighting stance. “Now feed, Kirishima.”
“I’ll do more than that…” Ayato struggled to his feet, crouching low. He suddenly smirked. “I’ll wipe the goddamn floor with your fucking guts.”
Kaneki didn’t notice his own smirk. “Come and try.”
Ayato lunged first, driven by hunger and newfound frustration. Kaneki didn’t expect the sudden speed, and felt Ayato’s nails scrape his cheek as he dodged to the side. He aimed a fist at Ayato’s cheek, but the boy turned, and his kagune, though shrunken by lack of sustenance, burst out of his open back, lining Kaneki’s hand and arm with small shards.
Kaneki jumped back to try and reorient himself, but he underestimated a ghoul’s hunger. He’d never been on the receiving end like this; Ayato chased him down and grabbed him by the arm, his fingernails sinking into the flesh so as to not let go. Kaneki winced slightly at the sensation, but that wasn’t the worst part.
The worst part was when Ayato’s teeth sank into Kaneki’s shoulder, far deeper than expected. It was as if he wanted the wound to never heal, and wanted to leave lasting proof that it was by his power that Kaneki suffered it. Ayato’s power, and no one else’s, simultaneously claiming victory and possession both.
Yet, for some reason, it was a familiar— thus comforting— sensation. Not familiar in the sense that Kaneki had been bitten like this, but familiar in the way that he had been held with the same intent before. The way Ayato’s hands clung to his shirt and arm, combined with the searing pain of his flesh being torn— it was like being held in both affection and contempt, love and disgust.
But were those not two sides of the same coin? By coveting that which we hate, desiring that which we despise, do we not also love them? Crave them? Need them?
Despite himself, Kaneki felt himself clinging to the sensation as Ayato fed on him, took from him. He clung to it like it was the only thing that mattered, far beyond kings or weeds or bad coffee beans; this current, familiar, foreign moment was all that mattered.
He enjoyed it.
He despised it.
Ayato’s hair was a shaggy, bloody mess, unkempt and uncared for. He needed to wash it, Kaneki thought. Did he even know how to wash it? Was that something a ghoul like him, so entrenched in that world, knew how to do? Would Kaneki have to—
“You taste weird,” Ayato said, getting off and wiping the blood dripping from his mouth.
Kaneki stayed still on the floor, bordering on rigid. “So I’ve been told,” he responded, feeling his shoulder struggle to put itself back together. “You were hungry.”
“N-No shit I was hungry!” Ayato shouted back, stuffing his hands into his pockets. There was a new color in his cheeks: a reddish and healthy hue. “Still… Still am…”
And that was why Kaneki continued to hesitate. Ayato, every so often, displayed behavior that was so much more… human than the other executives. Unlike Tatara, Eto, Noro, or even Naki, Ayato knew things. Knew the joy of peace, the sorrow of loss, and the painstaking existence of never having both as a ghoul.
However, Kaneki simply nodded, stowing away such thoughts for his greater purpose. “The raid must be over by now.”
“Hmph, no thanks to you.” Ayato rolled his shoulders. “The others are probably lookin’ for us. C’mon.”
Kaneki rolled to his feet, calming himself. He was not here to… frolic with the company he kept now; he was on a mission, and not even Ayato would stand in his way. “Alright.”
Despite that, Kaneki stared at his new wound, surrounded by torn fabric. It was closing, as it always did, but something was different. Instead of a bare patch of skin, Kaneki saw a scar in the shape of Ayato’s teeth. Almost like a brand, marking one’s territory, one’s property.
What loathsome pleasure he felt.
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Sonic Cyber Revolution, Entry 44: When The Shadow Calls
''A shadow of myself, just who am I? Scan horizons- A tragic mystery… You could have left me here, sealed inside the pod. No one would ever know – The chaos control. My true identity- The power that is me!''
– This Machine by Sonic Heroes (Team Dark Theme Song)
xXxXxXx
Sonic narrowed his eyes as he watched TV, turning the volume up. Midorikawa and Kero were at a cluster of warehouses at Souto, reporting the events that happened the previous night.
''…Hunters have been destroyed by an unknown Irregular. We're currently awaiting more information from their Commander, Loki the Wolf, to learn just how dangerous this Irregular might be…''
''As you can see, this was quite a battlefield…'' Kero added, pointing at the black scorch marks on the ground and walls, as well as crystals spread all over the place.
''That has to be Mephiles,'' Lucas said, sitting down next to Sonic, keeping his eyes on the TV. ''Out of all times… what is he up to?''
''Commander Loki, is it possible that this Irregular attack is somehow connected to the other Irregular attacks during the past few days?'' Midorikawa asked, lowering her microphone to the wolf ARNav's height.
''Unfortunately, we don't know yet whether there are any connections. The previous attacks have been targeted towards humans, but this one seemed to have been specifically focused on the Irregular Hunters. Not only that, but the Irregular that has caused this is much more powerful than the ones we usually encounter. It might be an anomaly,'' Commander Loki explained.
''An anomaly?'' Midorikawa blinked in surprise. Commander Loki opened his mouth to answer, only to suddenly close it.
''That is just a personal theory. As you know, Irregulars grow more powerful the more BioEnergy they absorb, but I suppose an anomaly might appear that doesn't need as much BioEnergy to cause so much chaos. Nevertheless, we are already working on tracking the Irregular down and eliminating them,'' Commander Loki explained in an assured tone.
''Loki did mention once that he encountered an Irregular who wasn't aggressive, so I guess that's the anomaly he's talking about. If he only knew…'' Sonic said, glancing at Lucas.
''I guess you're right, but why would Mephiles attack the Hunters? We know that he and Toshiro are after Shadow and Touka,'' Lucas said.
''Maybe he's also bored?'' Sonic suggested.
''Maybe, but I'm certain that he probably has more malicious reasons for this,'' Lucas replied. ''I don't believe that their original goal would change, but still, attacking the Hunters doesn't make any sense.''
''Hey, I'm sure we'll figure out the reason why they're doing this… Well, you will, since you're pretty good at piecing this kind of stuff together,'' Sonic said. Lucas nodded, only to pause for a moment.
''Say, do you think that Mephiles and Toshiro would know about ARMS?'' he asked.
''I wouldn't be surprised if they did,'' Sonic replied.
''Maybe they're antagonizing the Irregular Hunters to force ARMS to reveal themselves?'' Lucas suggested. ''I mean, if there aren't any Hunters, ARMS would have to intervene.''
''I think they should reveal themselves to the public,'' Sonic said in an uncharacteristically blunt tone. Lucas blinked in surprise, tilting his head as he looked at his partner. Sonic sounded quite bitter and uncaring, and frankly, he couldn't blame his partner for that. Their friends' life was a complete mess because of ARMS, and frankly, having them become public knowledge would be for the best.
''The question is, if Toshiro and Mephiles are trying to provoke ARMS into fighting them, should we let them do this?'' Lucas suddenly asked, with Sonic giving him a look of surprise. ''I know that we should probably go and tell Loki and the Hunters what we know-''
''We could confront Mephiles and Toshiro on our own,'' Sonic suggested, with Lucas giving him a curious look. ''I don't want the two to cause trouble and hurt more people, and I feel quite bored. So, the least I can do is to try to track these two down.''
''Should I call the rest of the team?'' Lucas asked. ''I don't think it's going to be easy to find the two.''
''Tell them to keep an eye out for them,'' Sonic said, getting up. ''I'll go for a run and see whether these two will show up when they see me.''
xXx
Shadow took a sip of coffee, or rather, diluted coffee bean water as he called it, with Omega agreeing with this assessment, and listened quietly to the chatter in the canteen. He took note that it was mostly the human agents having a conversation, while the Irregulars were quietly eating as ordered. He turned back to Touka, Rouge and Omega, with the former two trying to answer the robot's questions as honestly as possible.
''Unfortunately, we don't know the size of Eggman's forces, but I assume that he should've an army of Badniks,'' Touka said.
''That is fine. The more the merrier,'' Omega replied.
''What do you mean by that?'' Rouge asked.
''The more targets I have, the more opportunities I get to prove my superiority,'' Omega explained. Touka snorted in amusement, giving him a thumbs up.
''Well, that logic makes sense to me,'' she said, smiling. Rouge just exhaled in exasperation, placing her hand on her forehead, although a small smile did appear on her lips. Shadow just quietly kept drinking his coffee, noting that the mood had changed quite a bit since Omega's arrival.
Since she was on her own, Rouge had to constantly stay on guard and figure out a way out by herself. With the arrival of Touka and Shadow, she was given an opportunity to escape, as well as someone she could discuss her options with, but the situation was still bleak. After all, the Commander was adamant to keep a close eye on ARMS Pet Project and use Shadow and Touka as he saw fit, treating them like tools rather than people. Not to mention, the other agents weren't too keen on interacting with them and the other Irregulars were practically zombies, so making any allies was pointless. They were also weighted down by the fact that their teammates were also in danger of being pursued by ARMS, so they tried to be on their best behavior.
However, with Omega the situation was almost comical. The robot had ties to no one, having gone against his own creator and was willing to fight anyone who got in his way, whether it was foe or friend. He was also quite trigger-happy, something the Commander had personally witnessed, making it clear that it would be smarter to keep this powerful robot as an ally before he decided to just destroy everything he came across. Lastly, Omega was also very headstrong and direct, having little to no filter, so the conversations with him were always interesting. In fact, he was quite open about blowing up ARMS HQ if they didn't get to go on some kind of mission. While Rouge and Shadow managed to keep him restrained, pointing out how they had a plan and needed to wait, Touka was on Omega's side, being quite cynical about ARMS. If it were up to these two, they would've blown up the walls and just walked out, but Touka knew well that they had to make sure that ARMS wouldn't go after them ever again. That was the only reason why she didn't try to convince Omega to go through with that plan.
''…an Irregular had completely decimated at least two Irregular Hunter Units.''
''I thought they could handle that.''
''Clearly not.''
Rouge and Shadow's ears flicked towards the gossip from the table behind them, with Touka and Omega also starting to pay more attention. Unfortunately for them, the two female agents were done eating and just got up to leave. Touka then quickly got up, stepping before them.
''I overheard you talking about some Irregular taking down the Hunters. What do you mean by that?'' she asked.
''It's been in the morning news,'' one agent told her in a dismissive tone. ''Apparently, there is an Irregular who had only been attacking Hunters and no one else, and supposedly it is really powerful. The grapevine says that ARMS will have to intervene in this case.''
''Well, that would make sense,'' the other agent said. ''I'm surprised they don't just replace the Hunters with ARMS agents.''
''Could you keep it quiet? I don't think that's something you should talk about,'' her co-worker chided her. The former rolled her eyes.
''So what? Everyone here believes that,'' she pointed out. Her co-worker narrowed hr eyes, nodding with her head towards the table Team Dark sat at. Touka, Shadow and Rouge immediately adopted the same exasperated expression of 'Yeah, these guys don't trust us.', deciding to just ignore it. The agents then left, with Touka turning back to the rest of Team Dark.
''What do you think?'' she asked.
''If the Commander wasn't so allergic to keeping us isolated from the outside world, we would've learned about this much sooner,'' Rouge commented. Shadow just placed down his cup and got up. ''Don't you have anything to say?''
''Not where everyone can overhear us,'' Shadow replied. Touka and Rouge had to admit that he had a point, quickly following him outside along with Omega. The dark hedgehog led them away from the crowd of other agents, regular employees and Irregulars that were roaming the hallways, trying to find a more secluded spot for a proper conversation. ''What is the possibility that this was an Irregular like the ones the Hunters usually deal with?''
Touka, Rouge and even Omega were caught off guard a bit by this question, with Touka answering, ''I suppose that this one is quite powerful.''
''Not to mention, the Irregular only targeted the Hunters,'' Shadow added.
''Do you think that it's possible that the Irregular might be someone like us rather than a typical Irregular?'' Rouge asked. Shadow shrugged.
''That's a possibility,'' he responded, his eyes darting to the nearby window, gazing at the blue sky. ''Since it's in Neos City, what are the odds of us going back?''
xXx
''How's the data analysis going?'' Lucas asked, having just arrived at the Taylor Workshop to check up on Warren and Tails.
''Well, the files had been transferring the whole night. It seems like ARMS has quite a lot of stuff to hide,'' Warren said, stretching his arms and rubbing his eyes.
''It also doesn't help that Eggman had been annoying us the whole night,'' Tails added, yawning. ''He tried to get to the files, but we managed to block him… for now.''
''Have you two even slept the whole night?'' Lucas asked in a concerned tone
.''In shifts,'' Warren replied, giving Lucas a tired smile. Lucas sighed, feeling bad for the two. Unfortunately, they were the only ones who could sort out these files, aside from Dr. Eggman, and the Doctor himself wasn't exactly helpful. However, maybe he could do something.
''I'll handle Dr. Eggman. You guys try to get some rest,'' Lucas told the two, tapping on the AR Visor and letting the holographic screen open. Moments later, Dr. Eggman's ugly mug appeared on the screen while he was carrying a coffee mug.
''Kinomoto, I had figured that you would call me at some point,'' he said. Lucas' eyes narrowed.
''Dr. Eggman, why are you trying to interrupt Warren and Tails' work on the ARMS files? I thought we had a truce,'' Lucas asked.
''Oh, we did, but then your friends decided to block me from accessing those ARMS files,'' Eggman replied. ''You should've left them to me from the start and none of this would've happened.''
''Would you have given us access to them if we let you work on them?'' Lucas countered with another question. Eggman was silent for a moment, simply staring back, with Lucas sighing. ''Yeah, I figured so. Despite the truce we agreed on, we still cannot trust you.''
''That I agree with,'' Eggman replied, slightly amused, only to give Lucas a serious look. ''Nevertheless, I want that data, and I will take it. I have already allowed you to use the EggNet and I'm not going to let you mess with my system.''
Lucas glanced at Warren and Tails with a somewhat defeated look on his expression as he tried to figure out how to negotiate in this situation. On one hand, they didn't care about the ARMS files unless it was something that could help them free Team Dark. On the other hand, they were certain that allowing Eggman access to all of that data would be a really bad idea.
''Could you at least give us some more time to get through the data?'' Lucas finally asked. He did not like the grin Eggman gave him, feeling as if the Doctor considered this a win for himself.
''I suppose I could… Once you're done, I'll be taking over the files anyways,'' Eggman replied, chuckling darkly and ending the call. Lucas audibly sighed as he closed the holographic screen.
''That… didn't go well,'' he muttered.
''This is the EggNet, so no surprise there,'' Warren said.
''Even if we try to permanently delete the files, he still might be able to recover them,'' Tails added. ''On the bright side, you did buy us more time to get this sorted out.''
''Right, but unfortunately, Dr. Eggman isn't the worst of our worries,'' Lucas replied, rubbing his temple. ''Sonic and I watched the morning news and several Hunter Units have been attacked and destroyed. We suspect that the culprits were Toshiro and Mephiles.''
''Why would they do that?'' Warren asked, him and Tails being quite confused. Lucas shrugged.
''I don't know, but I have some assumptions. Sonic is currently searching for them,'' he said. ''I have planned to call the rest of the team to tell them to keep an eye out for the two.''
''What's your theory in regards to them attacking the Hunters?'' Tails asked.
''It is possible that they want to draw the attention of ARMS, especially since Touka and Shadow are ARMS Agents now, but I can't be completely sure that this would be their main motivation,'' Lucas replied, his expression grim as he folded his arms across his chest. ''I hate to say it, but these two have really thrown a curveball at us.''
xXx
Mephiles and Toshiro are active again… that's really bad.
Silver sighed, tending to the plants in the greenhouse. He had participated earlier that day in a group call where Lucas told them about his theory that Toshiro and Mephiles were the ones who had attacked the Hunters and asking them to keep an eye out for the two. He couldn't help but feel a chill flowing down his spine once he heard that, especially since he knew that Mephiles was responsible for his ruined future. He made it his goal to prevent this future from happening, but now he was wondering whether this event would lead into his fiery future. He sincerely hoped that this wasn't the case, but how could he know?
Take a deep breath. Makoto said to not let it get to your nerves. Silver tried to calm himself down as he carried the tools back to the shed using his psychokinesis. Once he was done with the work, he walked outside to the rose bushes, with the voice back in his head still telling him about all the possible scenarios of how his future had happened. While he wasn't as much of a nervous wreck as he used to be, his imagination wasn't helping him either. Suddenly, he felt a strong gust of wind, with Sonic appearing next to him.
''Oh, hey Sonic!'' Silver greeted him, happy to see the blue hedgehog. '' I guess you're on another run, right?''
''It's more of a patrol. I'm trying to find Mephiles, but that guy is almost impossible to find,'' Sonic replied.
''What do you mean by 'almost impossible'?'' Silver asked. Sonic gave him a grim look.
''Mephiles and Toshiro had actually managed to lure out ARMS to fight them, and the ARMS agents were defeated,'' he told the grey hedgehog. Silver's golden eyes widened in surprise.
''Really? Where?!'' he asked.
''I've just left Starlight Lake. The field next to it was filled with bodies covered in those weird fire crystals Mephiles uses, both human and Irregulars,'' Sonic explained, his eyes narrowing. ''I did check on them and they were still breathing, but… I had to leave.''
''Have you told anyone about it?'' Silver asked. Sonic shook his head.
''I wanted to find Mephiles first. I think the fight was very recent and I thought I'd be able to find him, but nothing so far,'' Sonic explained. He had to admit that, despite his usual laid-back personality and being able to just go with the flow, he was actually disturbed to see the ARMS agents lying before him. It was a group of five humans and Irregulars, and all of them were motionless, with burn marks all over their bodies and blood pooling beneath their limbs, and Sonic had no clue whether they were even alive until he checked on them. They were alive, but Sonic knew that this was only because Mephiles and Toshiro didn't care to kill them when they had the chance. It also made him realize something else, something far more sinister. ''So far, Mephiles has managed to destroy several Hunter Units and the ARMS agents without any issue. Shadow and I had fought him, and I know he's really powerful, but it is possible that he might be even more powerful than we thought.''
''Considering what he did to the future, I'm not surprised. Not to mention, he is absolutely merciless if he's willing to do that to the Hunters and ARMS agents,'' Silver said. He could feel his own heart racing, with a sense of uneasiness slowly creeping through his body. If they made the mistake and underestimated Mephiles, he would be able to destroy them the same way he did with the Hunters and ARMS agents. ''Still, we can fight him. We all know how to fight and we also have Chaos Surge.''
''Yeah,'' Sonic said, perking up. He wasn't someone to give up easily and he was more than ready to charge into battle. That's why he was searching for Mephiles in the first place, to confront him, but before he could add more, a voice suddenly echoed in his head. You're being too reckless! Sonic scratched his head, wondering why this voice sounded so much like Shadow's and noted that this was what the dark hedgehog would probably tell him if he knew what he was up to. Admittedly, he didn't feel like he had been really reckless in the past few days, making sure not to do anything that would make ARMS go after him or after his friends, even managing to temper his own lack of patience to some extent. But, there was only so much he could do. He also had to admit that he kinda missed Shadow scolding him.
Suddenly, the two hedgehogs' attention was drawn to the field close to the small lake, now tainted by what appeared to be a literal black hole in the ground. Both Sonic and Silver's bodies grew tense as they observed a figure rising from the black hole, revealing itself to be a familiar face.
''Mephiles!''
Mephiles the Dark was floating above ground, and Sonic and Silver could sense dark energy emanating from him. It was similar to the Chaos energy they felt when they held the Chaos Emeralds in their hands, but this was far more foreboding. Their quills bristled, and Silver even summoned his psychokinesis, the cyan energy crackling in his arms. Both were ready to fight, but it appeared that Mephiles had other plans.
''I will give you only one chance to stand down. Heed my warning,'' he told them.
''Forget it!'' Sonic exclaimed defiantly and, ignoring the voice in his head now shouting at him to actually listen to Mephiles, dashed towards the Dark, who suddenly summoned a wall of fire. Sonic realized his mistake and curled into a ball, flying through the fire and realizing a moment later that the only reason he wasn't burned was because of Silver using his psychokinesis to protect him from the flames.
Silver then sent a blast of psychokinesis towards Mephiles, but he summoned a spike made out of crystal to block it, followed by a row of crystal spikes that engulfed Silver and Sonic, trapping both of them. Mephiles turned his attention towards Sonic. ''Do you really wish to die in this life as well? Because I can grant you that wish and there are no Chaos Emeralds here to revive you.''
''What do you want from us?'' Silver asked furiously, trying to free himself from the crystals. His arms were trapped between two and his toes were brushing the grass as the crystals have lifted him just above the ground.
''I am here to make you an offer,'' Mephiles responded, his answer surprising both of the hedgehogs. ''We may be enemies, but we do have the same interests.''
''Really? Because I don't recall hurting innocent people being on my list of interests,'' Sonic replied in a snarky tone, trying to figure a way out of his prison. He placed his hands on the crystals, only for them to suddenly heat up, forcing him to retreat.
''That was a necessary sacrifice to draw the attention of ARMS. I assure you, I desire to see their fall as much as you do,'' Mephiles told him. Both Sonic and Silver narrowed their eyes, giving him a cold stare. ''Whatever you and your friends are up to, I doubt that it will be enough. ARMS needs to be shown that they cannot control the Irregulars. There is way more to our existence than what they know.''
''If you think that either of us is going to help you, you're wrong,'' Sonic told him stubbornly. Mephiles laughed at him, his tone cold and sadistic.
''You really don't understand, do you? You will be involved in this battle, whether you want it or not. There are many Irregulars in this world, many like you and I, and once the public becomes aware of this truth, chaos will ensue,'' Mephiles told him. Suddenly, crystal shards started flying around as Silver broke out of his trap with the help of his psychokinesis.
''Is that what your ultimate goal is? Just to cause chaos?'' Silver asked, floating above the ground and surrounded by cyan energy. Mephiles slowly turned towards him, and even though he had no mouth, Silver could imagine a dark smirk on his expression.
''I am a weapon after all, so I'm simply fulfilling my purpose,'' Mephiles told him, his eyes narrowing. ''Perhaps, I could help you fulfill your mission.''
Silver's eyes widened in rage and he suddenly charged up and sent a blast of psychokinesis energy towards Mephiles, but the latter had vanished. Silver gasped, only to feel a sudden chill and turned around, seeing Mephiles emerging from his own shadow and rising his hand, with a pillar of fire enveloping Silver.
''Silver! Agh-'' Sonic grabbed the crystals, only to get burned. Ignoring the pain, he managed to spin-dash out of the trap and hurried towards Silver, who fell on the ground, a smell of burnt fur filling the air. Mephiles was nowhere to be found. Sonic fell on his knees, trying to help Silver up. ''Hey, Silv, Silver! Com'n, wake up!''
''Ughh…'' Silver felt as if a truck ran over him. Fortunately, he could still feel all of his limbs, having been protected somewhat by his psychokinesis. ''That… Mephiles… He baited me.''
''We should get you to Makoto. You don't look too well,'' Sonic said, helping Silver to get up and throwing the grey hedgehog's arm over his shoulder.
''I… I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…'' Silver felt a wave of pain washing over him.
''As you had said, Silv, Mephiles baited you. Let's just be happy that he didn't turn us against each other,'' Sonic told him. Silver nodded. He really hated that Mephiles managed to get to him so easily, but being reminded of his mission by the very person who had caused that disaster really riled him up and he wanted to destroy Mephiles then and there, but he messed up and payed the price.
Nevertheless, he knew that this battle wasn't over yet.
xXx
''What?!'' Commander Williams was completely baffled by the report he had gotten.
After he was informed by the Irregular Hunters that they had been dealing with a particularly volatile Irregular, he had sent several of his agents to deal with the problem. To his shock, not only did the Irregular defeat all of them, but he was also taunting ARMS, treating all of this like some kind of game.
''If you really want to have a chance against me, send in Shadow the Hedgehog.''
Commander Williams pinched the bridge of his nose, having read the report gathered from the survivors. He had no idea how this Irregular even knew about Shadow and his mood was swinging from baffled to enranged, his gut feeling telling him that the dark hedgehog might know something important. In the end, he relented, calling for both Shadow and Touka to get some kind of answer to what was going on. The moment the two entered the office, a holographic screen with the report appeared before them, startling the two.
''I had earlier this day sent several of my best agents to deal with an Irregular in Neos City, only for all of them to come back barely alive, burnt and beaten, and the Irregular demanding that you face him in a battle,'' Commander Williams stated in a stern tone, glaring at Shadow. ''I want an explanation!''
Shadow and Touka remained silent, reading the report and description of the Irregular (any recorded footage had been damaged during the battle and was unusable), quickly realizing that this was Mephiles the Dark who had attacked the ARMS agents. However, neither of them wanted the Commander, or ARMS for that matter, to know that.
''I don't know…'' Touka lied with a straight face, giving the Commander a puzzled look. ''This doesn't sound like any Irregular I have met.''
''Really? Or do you want to tell me that you're covering for someone, Agent Sakamoto?'' Commander Williams glared at her. Touka met his gaze, trying to keep an even expression, despite feeling quite nervous. Fortunately for her, Shadow had saved her.
''We have spent weeks out in the open in Neos City. The odds of us being targeted by another Irregular are high,'' he pointed out in a matter-of-fact tone. Admittedly, he wasn't exactly someone who could lie with a straight face, like Touka, but he was quite good at circumventing a conversation without having to give an honest answer.
''Then explain to me how this Irregular knows about the Codex Research Facility?'' Commander Williams pressed further, with Shadow already having an answer at hand.
''There were many people working at the Codex Research Facility, including Irregulars who had been captured for the purpose of being experimented on,'' he said. ''Information could've been leaked no matter how good the cover-up was.''
''There was no Irregular with this description at Codex,'' the Commander hissed, growing more and more impatient.
''What about Prof. Sakamoto?'' Touka suddenly said, surprising both the Commander and Shadow. ''We don't know where he was nor what he had been doing over the past years. What if this was another of his experiments?''
Commander Williams leaned back in his seat, thinking about what Touka had told him. Shadow, on the other hand, rose an eyebrow, wondering whether it was smart to reveal this piece of information. However, he did understand why Touka mentioned that, using the late Professor as a bait so the Commander wouldn't be suspicious of either of them. All the evidence was there, after all, and even if they acted as if they had no clue who the Irregular was, ARMS would eventually be able to connect him back to Prof. Sakamoto and the Codex Research Facility. Since the old man was dead, he couldn't confirm anything and therefore they were still speculating on what had happened, so giving them something to hold on was their best move.
''That… That is actually a possibility, even though I don't know where Prof. Sakamoto would get his resources for this Irregular,'' Commander Williams said, seemingly satisfied with this answer. It made sense, after all, as Hiroshi Sakamoto was deeply connected with Project Shadow and Codex. ''Regardless of everything, we need to deal with this Irregular. You two and your teammates will be sent to the Codex Research Facility tomorrow to either capture or destroy the Irregular. We simply cannot let this thing roam free and cause more damage. However, you will only remain in Infinity Forest. I don't want either of you anywhere close to the borders of Neos City.''
''Yes, sir.''
Despite wanting to retort that Infinity Forest was well within the borders of Neos City, Touka and Shadow quickly left the office. They knew that Rouge and Omega, as well as Team Neos, would be quite interested in this turn of events.
xXx
''Hey, Shads.''
''I see that you had actually remembered to whisper during these calls,'' Shadow said, with Sonic rolling his eyes. It was in the middle of the night, and while Team Dark and Team Neos had already exchanged information in regards to the situation with Mephiles and Toshiro, Shadow decided to also call Sonic, feeling that this has already become a habit. He also knew that Sonic would be thrilled to finally have something he could talk about on his end, so he immediately added, ''You had said earlier that you and Silver had confronted Mephiles.''
''Yeah, and I wish that we had managed to deal with him at that point, but he got away,'' Sonic replied, sounding a bit frustrated, then snorted, trying to cover his frustration with some humor, ''So much for being The Fastest Thing Alive if I can't catch up to Mephiles or find him for that matter.''
''Finding Mephiles has nothing to do with your speed. He is someone who lives in the shadows, coming out only when nobody expects him,'' Shadow responded in a matter-of-fact tone. He was well aware that Sonic hated the fact that he couldn't stop Mephiles from hurting the Hunters or even the ARMS agents and Irregulars, so he simply made a logical statement. However, going by the smirk that had formed on his lips, Sonic understood the message a bit differently.
''Thanks for trying to cheer me up,'' Sonic told him, with Shadow giving him a puzzled look.
''I wasn't- That wasn't my-'' He tried to clear this up, only to realize that Sonic already knew that, giving him a wide smile. Shadow exhaled sharply. ''Fine, I suppose you can interpret it that way.''
''You know Shads, you can be as cruel in your honesty as you want, but sometimes the stuff you say feels quite comforting,'' Sonic told him, with Shadow just nodding in acknowledgement. ''So, do you have any idea what Mephiles wants from you? We all agreed earlier that he was antagonizing the Hunters and ARMS to get to you.''
''I believe that all he wants is another battle, just like last time,'' Shadow replied, a grim look appearing on his expression as he remembered their last encounter.
''He'll also probably try to manipulate you, just like he tried to do with me and Silver. Don't give in!'' Sonic said, pumping his fists and giving Shadow a resolute look. Shadow was a bit surprised to see Sonic suddenly turn into his personal cheerleader, but decided to play it cool.
''I'm not going to be swayed by anything Mephiles says. I have unfinished business with him and I'm going to focus on that,'' Shadow told him.
''I'm glad to hear that. Too bad I nor the rest of the team can join you in this battle,'' Sonic said, recalling the earlier conversation. Since Team Dark was going to be at the Codex Research Facility, the possibility of Team Neos helping them was brought up, only to get quickly dismissed when Lucas pointed out that if ARMS finds out that they know about Codex, Team Dark would get in trouble. Therefore, they would have to sit this one out, even though all of the team wanted to join in regardless of the danger.
''I know that I can trust the rest of Team Neos to not interfere, but I doubt that you would just stand at the sidelines,'' Shadow commented.
''Well, I'm trying my best not to do anything reckless lately. It also helps that I hear your voice scolding me whenever I make up my mind,'' Sonic said, sounding somewhat proud of his achievement. Shadow was a bit stunned for a moment, feeling a wierd mix of amusement and that familiar warmth he sensed whenever he talked to Sonic.
''So, you're telling me that whenever you think of me, it's me scolding you for doing something reckless? I don't know whether I should feel offended or flattered,'' Shadow replied in a deadpan tone. Sonic snorted.
''Maybe I should've put this in a different way…'' Sonic suddenly shook his head. ''You know what, forget it. I'd be happy to hear you yell at me whenever I do something stupid so long as I know that you're back at home safe and sound.''
Shadow fell silent, a faint tint of red spreading across his muzzle. His crimson eyes were wide, and he was stunned by Sonic's sudden confession. It was quite unexpected, but at the same time, he knew that Sonic said that because he genuinely cared about him. As much as he wanted to deny it, he was glad that this was the nature of their relationship. It still puzzled him that they were able to tell each other things the other needed to hear, or understand exactly each other's moods without needing to say anything, but he preferred it that way. He wasn't someone who engaged in pointless conversations, but somehow every conversation he had with Sonic ended up in some kind of revelation for Shadow. He felt as if he was learning more about himself this way, and one of the things he understood was that he was going to match Sonic in anything.
''I suppose it would get a bit boring without having you to annoy me, so I'd do the same for you,'' Shadow said, his tone being the usual business-like way he spoke, trying to ignore the strange fluttering feeling in his chest. Why did I even say that?!
''D'aaaww, that's so sweet coming from you, Shads! I appreciate the sentiment,'' Sonic replied, feeling quite happy that he had managed to get Shadow to admit how he felt about him. He couldn't help but chuckle lightly when Shadow shot him a glare.
''Don't think anything of it, Hedgehog. This is just a courtesy. I don't want to be in your debt,'' Shadow growled. Sonic waved his hand in a dismissive manner.
''Yeah, yeah… But you have to admit it, you do care about me,'' Sonic teased him. Shadow was silent, still glaring at his rival, but Sonic knew that this was less because he was offended and more because both knew that this was the truth. He then held up a finger. ''How about this? I admit that I care about you, and you admit that you care about me.''
Shadow folded his arms in defiance. ''That's not going to happen.''
''Maybe you won't say it, but you do care about me,'' Sonic pressed on, still having that dumb smile that irritated Shadow. Despite Shadow managing to keep an unreadable expression, aside from his trademark scowl, he knew that his rival was struggling with this conversation, clearly not wanting to admit the truth, either because of his pride or because he was just too embarrassed.
Shadow, on the other hand, had to wonder how in the world had he ended up in this conversation. Somehow, Sonic had the uncanny ability to rile him up with just a simple smile, and being the stubborn person he was, he wasn't going to back down from a challenge, even if it led him to confess stuff he never wanted anyone to know, not even Touka. ''I have already stated that if the reverse were to happen, I would go to save you. There is nothing else to discuss.''
''Yeah, yeah…'' Sonic was still grinning, while Shadow just frowned, both staring back at each other in silence. Even if some things were left unsaid, they knew exactly how they felt about each other.
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Uta x reader - timing
Hii i hope you are doing good i had idea for Uta from Tokyo ghoul.💕 Reader is Kaneki’s little sister who was born like ghoul (nobody knows how) and she started working for anteiku the same day as Kaneki. Uta goes to anteiku every day after she started working and everyone even Ken was teasing him to ask her on a date or something. (His sister is only sweet to Uta) - @ashllleyyy💜
You looked at your brother from your spot on your couch and gave him a soft smile.
Getting up, you walked over and adjusted his jacket, pulling his eye patch from his face so you could see his mismatched eyes.
“I can’t control it…” He mumbled.
He took the eye patch in and walked over to your bathroom to put it back on.
You stood in the doorway, arms crossed over your chest as you looked at him through the mirror, black and red eyes boring into his.
“K… listen to me okay, it’s going to be okay. I promise.”
“Easy for you to say, you’ve been a ghoul your whole life….”
Sighing, you moved so he could walk past and you grabbed your jacket.
“We’re all going to take care of you, okay? We’re a family, we’ve got to look out for each other.”
Kaneki turned to face you, holding out your jacket towards you.
“Is that why you started working at the same time as me?” He asked.
Pulling in your jacket, you nodded your head and ushered him out of the door before locking it and leading him to the car.
“Of course idiot. I know you’re struggling, but you’re getting better. It’s been a few months, and you’re slowly improving.”
Kaneki gave you a soft smile and you grinned back at him.
“Thanks sis…”
You hummed and handed him the phone to pick some music while you drove.
You didn’t exactly live close by, and Kaneki didn’t want to be alone just yet, he was scared, and upset, so you were letting him stay with you.
Hide was mad about it, but he also knew if he ever wanted to see his best friend he could always drop you a message to either take Kaneki to him or pick Hide up and bring him over.
After a peaceful car ride, you parked in front of the cafe and gestured for him to make his way in.
You gathered your stuff and made your way in a few minutes after him.
You made your way upstairs first to put your stuff away and you walked over to Touka’s room.
Knocking on the door you waited.
“What?” She called.
“Hey it’s me, I’m coming in.”
Opening the door, you walked in and closed it, following the light to the bathroom where she was knelt down, gripping her stomach.
Kneeling next to her, you pulled her hair from her face.
“You can’t keep doing this.”
“She’s my friend.” Touka snapped back.
“I know… but maybe just don’t eat as much of it?”
Touka sighed but she didn’t reply.
She knew you were right, it was practically killing her at this point.
“I’ve got to get ready…”
You helped her up, but instead of taking her to get dressed, you lead to her bed and sat her down, giving her a small smile.
“I’m covering your shift, don’t worry. Get some rest, and if you’re feeling better later come down, okay?”
She reluctantly nodded her head and you beamed brightly, tucking her into her bed before passing her phone over and heading towards the door.
“I’ll bring some coffee up soon.”
Uta was lingering outside, debating whether or not he should go in, but it was getting cold and seeing a few of the doves walking around he quickly decided.
Walking through the doors, he headed over to a small table in the corner away from the windows and looked around.
“She’s gone upstairs.” Kaneki smiled.
“I wasn’t looking for her…” Uta mumbled.
Nishiki chuckled as he walked over, setting a cup down in front of the gothic ghoul, leaning against the other chair.
“Of course not, it’s not why you come here every night.” The ghoul taunted.
Uta grumbled a little and pushed the cup away.
“Come on! I make good coffee!” Nishiki huffed.
“It’s cause it’s no (Y/N)s coffee.” Irimi grinned.
She waltzed over and took the cup away, giving Uta a little wink.
“I don’t see why you just don’t ask her out.” Koma shrugged.
“There’s no one she would date someone like him.” Nishiki scoffed.
Uta glared slightly at the other ghoul, and he looked around to make sure you were still upstairs.
“Because I don’t. That’s why.” He mumbled out.
You were heading down the stairs and waltzed out into the cafe, heading behind the counter to start getting yourself ready for the shift.
“Your favourite is here.” Koma smirked.
Looking at him, you rolled your eyes.
“Shut up ape.”
“Oooo so cold.” Irimi snickered.
You brewed a coffee, walking around them you headed to the exact table you knew Uta would be sat at and set it down with a smile.
“Just the way you like it.”
Uta smiled up at you and you beamed down at him, putting on your straight face again as you went to serve some customers that just came in.
Every so often someone would come over, teasing him, or telling him to just flat out ask you out.
You shift ended an hour ago, but your brothers didn’t end until the shop closed, so you headed over to Uta’s table and pointed to the seat.
“May I?”
“Certainly.”
He slide you over the coffee cup in front of him and you slid it back.
“You’re gonna need it since I’m off shift now.” You teased.
Uta rolled his eyes at you and chuckled a little.
You guys sat talking for a little while, and he glanced at his phone, stuffing it into his pocket.
“I have to go.“
“Let me drive you, there’s doves crawling everywhere right now.”
“And your brother?”
“He’ll be fine he’s still here for a few hours.”
Uta shrugged, and you gathered your stuff letting your brother know where you were going.
Uta glanced at you and smiled a little to himself, he was going to ask you out tonight
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Touken Playlist
“I’ll See You Later, Okay?”
Porcelain Face - 4 Door Theatre (“they call me the kid with the cardboard face / pencil a smile or frown then erase”)
Hunger - Of Monsters and Men (“i can be the wolf, and when you’re starving you’ll need it too”)
I Think It’s Arrogance - Set It Off (“another view might show you what your problem is / i think it's arrogance”)
True Love - P!nk (“i hate you so much i think it must be true love”)
Who Knew - P!nk (“if someone said three years from now you’d be long gone / i’d stand up and punch them out / cuz they’re all wrong”)
World So Cold - Three Days Grace (“living in a world so cold / counting the days, since you’ve gone away from me”)
Here Without You - 3 Doors Down (“i’m here without you baby, but you’re still on my lonely mind”)
Please Don’t Leave Me - P!nk (“i can be so mean when i wanna be / i can cut you into pieces, when my heart is broken”)
Nothing To Lose But You - Three Days Grace (“you’re the best and the worst / because you know all my secrets / all my demons / and you keep ‘em in check”)
My Life Would Suck Without You - Kelly Clarkson (“i know that i’ve got issues / but you’re pretty messed up too”)
He’s Not Yours - Beth Crowley (“what would you do if i came right out said ‘i swear i won’t fuck it up this time around’?”)
Love Me or Leave Me - Three Days Grace (“too many times i’ve been left behind”)
Vacant - Echos (“i'm sick of awaiting your vacancy / i hope that you choke on your vacant teeth / no space in your broken veins left for me / i know that you're empty”)
Chemicals Collide - The Impulsive (“i can't undo what you did to me / now we know that chemicals collide”)
Monster - Gabbie Hanna (“they're droppin' like flies whenever i'm around / so used to goodbyes there's comfort in the sound")
ドーナツボール (Donut Hole) - Kenshi Yonezu (“try one more time, a hundred times / all I remember is your face”)
Miss Missing You - Fall Out Boy (“the person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger”)
How You Remind Me - Nickelback (“it’s not like you to say sorry / i was waiting on a different story”)
Strange Days - Three Days Grace (“all i have is right here and now / so we’ll make this moment last forever / and if we go, we go together”)
Young Blood - Bea Miller (“but in dark times when we close our eyes / It's a nightmare, it's a nightmare / when the sun don't shine we lose our minds / but I swear, we can get there”)
Fire on Fire - Sam Smith (“fire on fire would normally kill us, but this much desire, together we’re winners”)
Silence - Marshmello & Khalid (“i’m in need of a savior, but i’m not asking for favors / my whole life, i’ve felt like a burden”)
Lover. Fighter. - SVRCINA (“we were called into battle / and all of it shattered / but i’m aiming high not to lose you”)
Katharis - Dima Lancaster (“it has to be me! it can’t be me!”)
Katharsis - TK from Ling tosite sigure (“i will miss you, i will miss you”)
I Choose You - Sara Bareilles (“tell the world that we finally got it all right / i choose you”)
King - Lauren Aquilina (“there's so much more, you can reclaim your crown / you're in control, rid of the monsters inside your head / put all your faults to bed, you can be king again”)
Paint Me Black - Ben Hazlewood (“i won't hide from you”)
King and Lionheart - Of Monsters and Men (“you’re my king and I’m your lion-heart”)
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Sooo, if we're talking about Shisui pairings, would you be willing to talk about Shisui/Tobirama? You've got two fics on it, so clearly there's something about it that appeals to you, and I'd love to hear about it! I know in your Eye of the Beholder fic you have a little bit of Tobirama foaming at the mouth trying to figure out how Shisui out sped him and then being exasperated at how he fucked up his body to keep fighting (and being startled at how friendly and chatty Shisui was?), which is a great dynamic. So you've already got me hooked on it, I'd just like to hear your more in depth analysis/reasoning/ideas if you have any 😁
Hey, Anon!
So, I've just come from answering another ask wondering about my Shisui/Tobirama, so I absolutely CAN talk about Tobirama!
Far from considering Shisui as interchangeable with Kagami in this pairing, I think they work really well for a bunch of reasons!
Let's look at the context 😌
Shisui: (at risk of sounding like a broken record)
Genius, in a hands-on and not braggy way (he's not mad scientist like Tobirama but he's not a Genius of Hard Work like Gai either, it's all about the subtle cleverness and the perfection of the simple into the inescapable)
Skilled, he is THE fastest Shinobi of all time
Resourceful, he literally was like "Undetectable Unbreakable Reality Eyes OR Speed lane?? NO QUESTION" and yeeted his Mangekyou off to one side lol
Loyal, he has no hint of the illusive 'Curse of Hatred' even if he is unfortunately afflicted with 'Melodramatic Uchiha Bitch' (why, why, why the cliffffff)
Shisui is, despite what I just said, hard to fluster and he has social skills (so many Tobirama ships are Uchiha flailing in his direction whilst he's trying to be productive 🤣) as well as professionalism and A Life™ (hence why, in New Leaf, I think Kagami& Shisui's bloodline is most likely through Hikaku)
Shisui loves peace more than his clan, he loves konoha more than his clan, but he will defend his people even if they hate him for it
He fucks around with space, time, reality, and jutsu
He will do anything for those he considers important (even abstract constructs like Peace and Konoha) and he's amazing with kids, he is that parenting meme where he's carrying Sasuke out of the ocean by his foot and laughing whilst simultaneously cuddling shy Itachi in a blanket 🤭
Tobirama:
He's a genius mad scientist, his goals outweigh the ethnics (did anyone try the zombie resurrection? I thought the zombie resurrection was lovely) as well as coming up with, presumably, most of the techniques in the Not-So-Forbidden-Scroll Naruto stole
He's emotional (impatience and disgust are emotions, Tobirama ffs) and he feels deeply (why work through grief when you can try to cheat death?) and he was able to devote himself so much to Hashirama's dream as well as sacrifice himself for his beloved students, one of whom was Uchiha Kagami
His Hokage tenure is a pretty divisive topic in this fandom but you can't tell me that Hashirama was writing laws and planning sewage systems 🥴 Tobirama was practical AND detail-oriented, a good leader and a good planner
He loves children, if he just wanted to instruct people then he'd do lectures and rewrite all the handbooks but he takes on personal and young kids to nurture them, and he might be younger but he's more of the older brother to Hashirama as well as Kawarama and Itama, the only people to actually be older siblings to him are Touka and Mito
He's adaptable, he didn't believe in peace because he didn't trust that it wouldn't be a trap and wipe out his clan. Tobirama was fixated on the continued survival of his clan, even though he knew it was a pointless cycle of death and destruction, but he was able to flip to building and maintaining the village, something many others couldn't do. Tobirama, who had been the face of Senju viciousness all his life, was able to become the Nidaime and bolster peace and unity...
He might craft insane new Jutsu but nothing beats the stunning simplicity of water manipulation
Tobirama is quiet and thoughtful but, whilst he is more concerned with his own work etc, he isn't callous or oblivious, he's too well trained for that, and his bluntness is reassuring because lying is a different skill and purpose
So, together... ✨
Shisui is fast enough, physically and mentally, to keep up with Tobirama as well as make Tobirama have to chase him a good amount of the time... Whereas Tobirama is resourceful and determined enough to follow Shisui through any trial as equals, something unprecedented for either of them. Shisui can be quiet and easygoing and calm, which suits Tobirama well, and Tobirama can also be argumentative and nosey to match Shisui's inquisitive nature!
Skills wise, I love that the mind-bogglingly simple perfection of Shisui's Shunshin is enough to have Tobirama wringing himself in knots over undervaluing the smallest movements and uses of chakra, once he finishes being pissed he will be enamoured. Shisui, in turn, is from a world where jutsu creation has kinda died! The Uzumaki are wiped out, the Uchiha have regressed into their compound, the geniuses like Minato are dead... You just have Kakashi, nicking techniques left and right, and bloodlines growing more and more extinct because of the Bloody Mist etc etc etc... So not only is the Warring Clans Era filled with long-dead legends but it also has Tobirama, the OG Big Name in invention, who does what no one Shisui had ever met before could do.
Also, in the case where Shisui spills the beans about the future, the two of them will be the perfect dream team to make Konoha and, frankly, the whole system far better than the first time around. Tobirama knows how things develope, what Jutsu he's made in the future, and can tailor his processes so much more efficiently. Shisui, with Tobirama (and, therefore, Hashirama) can safeguard in a similar way. They basically align so nicely, both technically and ideologically, that a platonic or professional partnership is also very much ideal.
Romantically, Shisui and Tobirama have the balance to be very fulfilling for each other. They are well suited in energy and their innovative mentalities, they are both hardened killers with tenderness/softness reserved for younger generations/the future, and they are both ridiculously beautiful lol.
Shisui and Tobirama are also self destructive in similar ways, Shisui in that he will hurt himself (rip his fucking eye out 🤦) in the heat of the moment whilst Tobirama won't care if Hashirama hates him so long as he successfully protects him (like killing Izuna, which must've hurt Hashirama's dreams for peace but Tobirama would see as a worthwhile price to take out a huge threat). Together... Tobirama would like 'a plan that damages you??? Not a viable plan, idiot!' and Shisui would be like 'sacrifice your reputation etc to protect those you love? I would never fall of it!' and they'd live happily ever after 🤭
Also...
The Nidaime was one of the sources of Uchiha resentment in the village, he gave them the Police Force which caused problems, and he taught Shisui's would-be murderer, Danzo
Shisui, to match, is an Uchiha who is literally Tobirama's worst nightmare 🤣 a Mangekyou that is undetectable, unbreakable, and he wouldn't even know it was impacting him, regardless of his chakra control or how good of a sensor he is
So it's funny and ironic too 🤣
Hope you enjoyed this rant, Anon, have a great day/night ✨
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I got an idea
So, we all know how gorgeous Yamori's kagune is right? So, remember when Nishiki's gf got all frozen with how pretty she thought that Touka's kagune looked? So, Yamori with a s/o that reacts the same way when they see his kagune for the first time and loves looking at it, petting it and even seeing Yamori fighting with other people using it
Idk I just rlly love the design of his kagunes and they look rlly soft even with the pointy tips and such and thought it would probably feel nice to cuddle with them so yeh
Have a great cycle of 24 hours ^^
Crystalline
I often wonder what it would be like to touch them ngl. Especially with how crystally it looks!
Note: Pre-cannibal happenings.
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He’s got a beautiful kagune, there’s no doubt about it.
Their glimmer, their form, how they move, it’s all so amazing! It’s almost like watching liquid crystal flow and move. Gods you want to touch it so bad.
Is that too invasive or in appropriate? You don’t know for sure but while you save yourself the embarrassment by not asking, you’re still stopping yourself from experiencing him fully.
The first time you saw it was life changing.
You’d been out with him on a rather dangerous outing and things did not go well. It was at a point where he had to use his kagune.
Watching him use it was amazing.
It was an odd thing to think but it was almost majestic in a way.
The more you watched him, the more your need for contact grew.
It made you somewhat sad once it was over. You obviously didn’t want him to get hurt but you also didn’t want to miss the opportunity to get closer to him.
He knocked you out of your frozen stupor to ask if you were alright. You said you were fine and then the both of you went on your way.
It’d been a good while since then but again, the need was still there.
You were honestly at a point where it was almost painful to not say anything. So you finally decided that you would.
Because you were worried about what he might say, you decided to wait until you were both winding down and getting ready for bed.
Lordy it was tough to form the words but you managed to.
He gave you an unreadable look before getting up.
You expected him to get up to leave but he took off his shirt instead. Then came what you’d been dreaming of.
Crystalline.
You stood from your spot on the bed and made your way over to him. It was almost surreal.
And then he told you to touch it.
It was like a dream come true.
They felt warmer than you’d imagined but also a tad strange. They were scaly but smooth. You could feel a slight pulse in them as you ran your fingers across them.
He stiffened slightly as you made it back to his shoulder blade before relaxed again.
You knew he wasn’t one for sappy words or niceties so you opted to show your love and appreciation another way.
It was a tad tough but he curled his kagune in once he got what you were going for.
You couldn’t get your arms all the way around him and your front pressed to his back was a bit rough but you didn’t care. The feeling of him was perfect and you knew he understood what the hug meant.
It was probably the most intimate moment you’d ever shared.
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does yamako really ship lipxlip 😃
It's never been outright stated, but:
When Hanipre was still alive, she would accept friend requests to people maining lipxlip. Apparently, especially if they had "aiyuu" in their bio. This has been noted by other people, not me, as I couldn't have hanipre until the final week...when I got a new phone.
She follows some aiyuu artists (biggest example is Touka- who was primarily an aiyuu artist. Now she's an official Honeyworks illustrator)
She's said in the past that she has private comics about them (shared w Moge, I believe?)
She fought tooth and nail to get the kiss marks placed here. According to her fanbox, she asked Shito if it looked good but he was unsure about the placements, but she refused to put them anywhere else.
From the get-go, we know that she's basically outright told us that Aizou and Yujiro do each others kiss marks. I don't mean from the MVM outright showing us Aizou and Yujiro kissing each others necks, or them going "secret ;)" when Uchida asks them how they got them. Look at this art she drew.
Not to mention in just about every MV that Yamako has drawn of them (which is almost all of them except a few), she always ends up drawing them with suspicious poses.
Bonus: From the get-go, Yamako wanted to put Hiyori with a childhood friend, so she never meant for Hiyori to be shipped so much with Aizou and/or Yujiro. She states this I think it was in the LisAni..?? (The part about her wanting Hiyori to be with a childhood friend from the start romantically, I mean, not the last bit) It just took her a really long time to design Nagisa because she felt as though she couldn't grasp him very well. Not to mention, due to other projects, Nagisa kept getting pushed back until 2021.
So...does she ship lipxlip??? We can definitely make inferences on it, but she seems super hyped about Yume Fanfare being for the two and knew what she was doing when she drew Samishigariya so...I assume so, yes.
If not, then she is just very invested in these two.
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Lðvê ¢ðmê§ wï†h grêå† l𧧠- †ðµkå x !Gñ! RêåÐêr
Warnings: Your average Tokyo Ghoul angst + Swearing + A bit of comfort
Requested by: No one
Synopsis: Reader comforts Touka after Ryouko’s unfortunate demise
Notes: I miss writing Tokyo Ghoul content so to all those reading, feel free to send in a request for some of the characters and I’ll see what I can do :)
Silence took over Anteiku’s foundations-pure,dead silence…out of respect for the lost. The shop was closed due to the unfortunate events that had taken place, therefore the usual cheer and tranquility that many brought alongside them was not present as of today.
The unfortunate demise of Miss Ryouko Fueguchi fuelled hatred and despair upon the workforce of the little cafe in the 20th ward, so much so that it subsequently sparked understandable rage and an overpowering thirst for revenge.
Touka was blinded by her overpowering emotions, with every right she had a reason to feel this way, she did what she felt was right. She had a desire to make the wrong-doers and poisonous hypocritical doves (that sparked unnecessary fear and fury towards innocent beings merely trying to survive) pay for their crimes among the virtuous and guilt free family known as the Fueguchis.
Touka knew what Hinami’s story felt like all too well seeing it happen to another who was so close to her made memories that she’d rather forget and leave in the murkiness of the past bubble within in her and mix corrosively with the inner turmoil of demons and burdens within her.
The 17 year old girl sat on her bed (legs held up to her chest) trying to configure a plan to ambush the doves who killed Hinami’s parents. She was so caught up in her thoughts, that she hardly realised the tears streaking down her porcelain skin nor did she realise she had a visitor standing in her doorway with a small sad smile gracing their lips. “You doing alright in here Touka? You’ve been holed up in here for a while now.”
Touka looked up from her lap and noticed the ever so familiar appearance of her significant other. “What do you think? Surely you must have taken the hint of me wanting to be left alone right?” She mockingly laughed.
Y/n walked into Touka’s bedroom and tried their best to smile. They crossed their arms and responded, “Yes I know you wanted to be alone but I grew worried…besides I know what you’re really like,” Touka’s glossy eyes met with y/n’s, “Mind if I sit?”
Hastily the 17 year old wiped away her tears and nodded, “Y-yeah.”
Y/n wrapped their arm around Touka’s body and Touka leaned into her partners touch, “You try to put on a brave face for everyone in here, especially Hinami…that girl is so lucky to have someone like you in her life y’know that?”
Y/n looked down at their girlfriend. Eyes filled with sadness, red and puffy, her face was stained with tears and arms littered with small and very faint crescents from where her finger nails gripped so harshly. Y/n rested their head on Touka’s shoulder and whispered, “I know how hard it is to see something so similar from your own past happen to someone else and I get it’s tough to contain all these emotions.”
“I-I just don’t get why it had to be them. They could kill any one of us that ruin the good ratio of us!” Tears began to form once more, “Why couldn’t it have been me? A killer like me doesn’t deserve to live.”
Y/n broke the embrace they gave Touka and placed one finger underneath her chin, tilting her head and signalling her to look up. They wiped the stray tears that were escaping her beautiful violet hues, “Darling please don’t speak of yourself as such…”
With that requested y/n rested their forehead upon Touka’s, “I’m pissed that those fuckers get away with killing ours all the time…that’s why I’m offering my help.”
Touka’s head shot up, “Huh?”
Nodding they replied, “You heard me.”
A smirk now played at their lips, “I want to make the bastards pay. I want to witness their cries of agony as I rip out their organs and feast on their flesh, I want them to see the sheer terror displayed among their faces. Sinners must be cleansed as they say…and I’m willing to do whatever it takes.”
Touka took a deep breath and nodded, “Finally someone who knows what the hell they’re talking about. Justice needs to be served.”
Nodding once more you got off of Touka’s bed and kissed her cheek, “Alright then it’s settled. We set up a trap, possibly something revolving around false information, for tomorrow and as soon as the sun sets it’s time to make those rotten sods pay!”
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