So, every now and again you’ll see brodudes rushing to argue that there’s nothing wrong with bikini armor because “men are sexualized too” and that shirtless barbarians are made sexy to cater to women, etc.
However, whenever something that comes out to challenge this... its always the same cishet men who make this claim who also cry about a male character not meeting their expectations.
That’s because, unsurprisingly given that they’re usually designed by men, those supposedly exploitative images are generally made by men, for men to fulfil not just their fantasy of power but also of being some weird form of hyper masculinity.
Appealing to women is not a priority they actually care about, only the fantasy that their ideal would definitely get them laid. Many don’t allow themselves to consider if its appealing to men-loving-men... and well, they certainly don’t think about nonbinary people or anyone on the asexual spectrum.
Of course, if you read this blog, you almost certainly already knew these guys only thing about themselves - but I thought you’d enjoy the hilarity of them telling on themselves so spectacularly.
i think the (main) reason why mlm relationships are so fantasized in media and get more attention than wlw relationships is because it’s refreshing to see men express their feelings emotionally and physically to someone of the same sex without thinking it’s going to damage their masculinity. it brings a different meaning to the relationship. whereas girls are much more likely to show affection to other girls so it doesn’t affect us the same way when we see it in media. and i’m not saying this is an excuse to sideline wlw content because it isn’t and it should get the same attention, this is just what i think the reasoning behind it is.
France. Last Saturday, a man set fire to a woman who was just sitting on a bus. Four days later, an 80-yo man was arrested for the murders of his wife and their housekeeper. And yesterday, a man strangled his wife after an argument, and another man murdered his ex girlfriend.
Italy. One of the most visible effects of last year’s lockdown? The number of women murdered by their partners went up by 300%. So far in 2021, 13 women have been killed. Yesterday a man went to see his ex girlfriend, a special needs teacher who’d spent 20 years helping vulnerable children, and killed her with ‘unprecedented brutality’ in front of their 4-yo son.
UK. On March 3rd, a woman was walking home through a park. Three days later, her unrecognizable body was found in the back of a van. A male police offer has been charged with kidnap and murder. Since that day, six other women and a little girl have been killed by men.
Spain. Fourteen women have been killed so far in 2021. The latest victims are from last Monday: a man murdered his wife and their 11-yo daughter, then killed himself. Six days later, a man stabbed his ex wife seven times and left her to die in the building where she worked.
Germany. On Friday, a man killed his 4-yo daughter in Bavaria, and an 84-yo man killed his 89-yo wife in Saxony. The day before, there were two other murders and three attempted murders. In total, 37 women and seven children have been killed by men since January.
In Europe, men represent 49% of the population, and yet account for 95% of prison inmates. Worldwide, 96% of homicide perpetrators and 79% of victims are men (more than 90% of male homicide victims die in drug-related or gang-related crimes). In the United States, 99% of rapists, 88% of robbers, 85% of burglars, 83% of arsonists, 81% of vandals, 80% of perpetrators of domestic violence, and 78% of people arrested for aggravated assault are men. Young men are particularly at risk in every category.
If this was any other social group, it would be an urgent matter, and we’d come up with explanations and solutions to keep everyone safe.
I really think we need to talk more about WHY toxic masculinity is so prevalent in trans man spaces. Cis people will train you to be more rude and abrasive the moment they find out you're a man, and they'll treat it as support.
I've dealt with this, almost every trans man I know has also dealt with this. Cis people love to make it their job to push you into cis societal standards for men. They'll interrupt you more, they'll push you around, and they'll make you shut down your own emotions until you ''man up''.
To any trans man out there who needs it right now: Being a man isn't being emotionally constipated, defensive and nihilistic. Being a man is what YOU make it. Men can be kind, loving, and expressive. Don't let cis people push you into toxic masculinity, it's not worth it, and in the end it won't be what makes you pass more.
In this culture, we celebrate boys through the lexicon of violence – ‘you’re killing it,’ ‘you’re making a killing,’ ‘smash them,’ ‘blow them up,’ ‘you went into that game guns blazing.’ And I think it’s worth it to ask the question: what happens to our men and boys when the only way they can valuate themselves is through the lexicon of death and destruction? And I think when they see themselves only worthwhile when they are capable of destroying things, it’s inevitable that we arrive at a masculinity that is toxic.
it's so funny how many people, especially older people, are like, "ugh can't say anything these days. everyone's so sensitive. stupid snowflakes ❄🙄" but then they see two guys like,,, holding hands or wearing makeup, and they lose their absolute shit. like, cartoon red, steam-out-of-ears rage, giant man-child temper tantrums, but sure. we're the sensitive ones. lmao interesting concept
Today I met a man who talked about doing art; he used to do traditional art but the last 26 years he's been tablet weaving, making belts and guitar straps, and now he's gotten in to tapestry weaving. Littered throughout the conversation he kept saying "sorry for boring you with all this" and I wanted to cry, because I had literally asked him about his weaving, (also we're a yarn shop, where better to talk about fibre arts?) I was super interested, but he still felt guilty about talking about his creative output.
Men who do creative things are valid and great and please don't feel that it's not cool or that it needs to be swept under the rug because it's not "traditionally masculine" or whatever bullshit is out there.