#tried to use a lot of the original dialogue but with some changes and cuts

[jadelotusflower]

Stargate Rewatch: 1x01 Children of the Gods

After rewatching the original film I'm kicking off with the show's pilot - I actually watched both the original version and the "final cut" because there are aspects I enjoy of both. The final cut removes a few problematic elements and adds in some new material, but also cuts a few lines I really enjoy and the original version is really where my nostalgia lies, so... as always, my feelings, they are mixed.

Cold open with some redshirts - four men and one woman, sadly representative of the gender ratio the show will have going forward.

The unlucky Smurfette is Sgt Carol Weterings, not that I think she's ever mentioned by name in the episode.

"Probably the only thing it ever did was cost money." Heh.

I will say that Teal'c turning against Apophis at the end of the episode is nicely built - starting here where he examines the gun and identifies it as technology far advanced beyond the humans they’re used to dealing with.

When your name is above the title, you get introduced with an extreme close up.

The differences between the film and the show don't really bother me - I view the show as taking place in a very similar but alternate universe to the film rather than trying to squeeze them together - so O'Neil becomes O'Neill, Sha'uri becomes Sha're, Tyler becomes Charlie, Abydos is the closest planet to Earth, not the other side of the known universe, etc etc. But I consider the events of the film to be canon to the show universe unless directly contradicted.

But otherwise the pilot tries very hard to stick as close as possible to the film, to the point that Major Samuels states that General Hammond replaced General West.

Hammond says it’s been “over a year” since the events of the film, unclear exactly how much over.

The final cut has a longer version of the dead Jaffa, revealing one of them was a woman, and with all the changes to eliminate plot holes I don't know why Brad Wright put one back in. While we do see Jaffa women in the series, Goa'uld and Jaffa society is depicted as highly patriarchal and female Jaffa soliders are rare - we never see them in Apophis's ranks. It's an odd inclusion.

"What if the aliens get it?" "Well, they could be blowing their noses right now." hee!

"THANKS SEND MORE" Remember when Daniel had allergies? Give it a few episodes and the show sure won’t!

Amanda Tapping, doing her absolute best with some terrible dialogue. Brad Wright blames the "reproductive organs" speech on Jonathan Glassner, and it is terrible and thankfully removed from the final cut version, along with some other 90's era sexism from the bros. However there is one great moment, where Kawalsky asks "Have you ever pulled out of a simulated bombing run in an F16 at eight plus Gs?" and without missing a beat, Sam deadpans: "Yes." I love Sam.

"I'll give you exactly 24 hours to either return or send a message through - no Kleenex boxes, please." Hee, Hammond isn't quite the cuddly commander we know and love yet, but he has his moments.

It's very cute that Sam has a very similar reaction to the one Daniel had in the film just before going through the gate, although his was based in the wonder of something incredible and unknown, and hers is based in the physical manifestation of knowledge - says a lot about each of them and their similarities yet different perspectives - the marrying of these two points of view is what makes them such a good duo.

Michael Shanks, doing the James Spader impression that won him the role. He was only 26!

And of course Alexis Cruz, the only holdover from the movie (other than Erick Avari, who won't appear until season 2).

The original team sure did leave a bunch of weapons with the Abydonians, didn't they? I presume they taught them how to fire the guns because there's no way Daniel could/would have. He did however teach them very good English.

"Greetings from Earth, Doctor Jackson" - very cute, it's sad that Ferretti disappears into the ether by season 2.

Not the face of a woman who is shy, but a woman who knows how to make An Entrance. She even smirks a little as she walks over.

There is however a weird little moment where Sha're is reluctant to shake Jack's hand - maybe she wasn't impressed about his little joke brushing by Daniel? Both of these beats are removed from the final cut version which is probably for the best.

It's criminal Sha're doesn't actually get to speak in this scene, and in fact how few lines she has in the episode altogether.

It's disappointing, because Sha'uri was such an integral part of the film, and yet the show tries to get rid of her as quickly as possible to get Daniel on SG-1 and give him a core drive for the next three seasons. Her abduction is the precipitating event of Daniel's ten-year character arc and defining moment of transition from film!Daniel to show!Daniel, and yet she doesn't get a character arc of her own.

However I do think Shanks and Vaitiare Hirshon sell the relationship in the few scenes they have - they're very physically connected/protective of one another, perhaps concerned that Jack's there to take Daniel back with him (which is in fact the case). And of course Sha're, annoyed at being left behind while Daniel shows the others his discovery, gives him a very proprietary kiss.

I think show!Sha're gets a bad rap, she's spunky and I love her. I just wish there was more of her.

Sam and Daniel insta-bonding - Daniel making an intuitive leap to solve the puzzle and Sam filling in the gaps with science to make it work, they really are kindred spirits.

The issue with the cartouche though is that the symbols look like hierogyphs, not star constellations/Stargate glyphs.

Back in the pyramid, there's a scene sorely missing here - imagine if rather than ogling Sha're, Ferretti had a conversation with her, giving us more of a chance to know Sha're on her own terms rather than just Daniel's wife and the object of others desire. Especially when Ferretti was on the original mission so knows she's more than a "beautiful woman" - it would also give additional weight to him remembering the gate address where she's taken later on.

Teal'c clocks Skaara's gun as the same tech he saw on Earth in breadcrumb no. 2.

"Nothing good can ever come through this gate!" "You came through it , Daniel" I mean...I realise there are a lot of problematic white savior-y aspects to the show, but idk, this scene and the Abydonians all petting Daniel to say goodbye gets me. Sean Amsing as Tobay also returns in Full Circle which is a nice callback to this scene.

The final cut removes a reaction shot from Jack which I have mixed feelings about - I get that the focus probably needs to be on Daniel at that moment, but I do think it's important for Jack to appreciate how Daniel really found a home with the Abydonians and was appreciated and loved by them, and it's nicely played by RDA.

LOL, watch out for how many times Jack pats Daniel on the shoulder. Apparently that annoyed Shanks so RDA kept doing it, but it's also a nice little setup of their relationship going forward.

There's a second shoulder pat in the hallway.

Just two dudes, drinking beer, (not) talking about their feelings.

“She was the complete opposite of everyone else, she practically fell on the floor laughing every time I tried to do some kind of chore they all took for granted.” Underrated line, because it gives important context to Daniel and Sha’re’s relationship, and perhaps more importantly, how Daniel characterises her - she is the one who keeps him grounded, who teases him, there is balance to their relationship. There’s potentially an interesting parallel there to Vala in the later seasons, although it manifests in a very different way.

“I think she forgave me for what happened to our kid, she just couldn’t forget…I’m the opposite, I can never forgive myself, but sometimes I can forget.” This is a great scene.

The Final Cut removes all the “harem scenes” and while I can see why, we do lose a bit of context to Teal'c's involvement in the process as he is the one who chooses the women from the holding cell to go into the harem, and then from the harem to be presented to Apophis.

There was a missed opportunity to actually see Sha're interact with the other prisoners - she could have had a conversation with Weterings at least, find out she was from Earth, perhaps assure her that the others would be coming to rescue them.

To the surprise of no one I’m sure, this episode does not pass the Bechdel test.

But there is a hint of solidarity among the prisoners - first in the holding cell where the others hold Skaara back, and here in the harem Sha're squeezes the hand of another woman.

Weterings is killed by the hand device which keeps the electrical current aesthetic from the movie the show will later abandon - as Teal'c looks perturbed.

Daniel back on Earth immediately getting stuck into the coffee even though no one else is drinking, lol.

"Ra played a god, the sun god, he borrowed the religion and culture of the ancient Egyptians he brought through the gate and used it to enslave them." A bit of a change from the movie here, where it was the other way around - slightly less problematic!

Everyone is in dress blues except Kawalsky who is in camo, and Daniel, who is wearing Jack's clothes.

"Colonel I'd like to remind you that rescuing Dr Jackson's wife is a secondary objective." This line was removed in the final cut and I don't know why? It adds to Samuel's bastardry.

Has everyone forgotten about Weterings?

Shoulder pat no. 3!

In the second harem scene Sha're is now sitting isolated from the other women - did she argue with them? Just trying not to be noticed? What happened offscreen?

Also what's going on in the top left corner - it looks like the healing device! Maybe Sha're did throw down with one of the others and that's why she's on her own. I have to read into things, because the show gives us so very little of Sha're and it's a real shame.

She does get a good moment fighting against the guards though - earlier she was defiant and told them she wasn't afraid of them, here she bites one of them on the arm.

I understand from a narrative perspective why Sha're is the one who gets taken over, but it really is Schrodinger’s fridging - until she’s found Sha’re is both alive and dead for the purpose of the narrative, both Daniel’s primary drive and source of inner conflict.

Christopher Judge does so much with so little. Master of the cheek twitch!

Oof, the nudity. In isolation from everything else, it doesn’t bother me - it’s intended to be horrifying, not titillating, and is effective in conveying objectification and dehumanisation by the Goa'uld.

However, it was a studio request, Wright/Glassner regretted doing it, it doesn’t fit the tone of the show going forward, but most importantly Hirshon was pressured into the full frontal when she only agreed to topless, and for that alone it should be excised.

The puppet symbiotes are so much more effective than the cgi they use later. I don’t think there’s another scene in the show that really captures the menace of the Goa’uld like this one - the symbiote (who we'll later learn is Amaunet) slithering around on Sha're's body is just so visceral and horrifying. The glowing eyes before implantation is an effective touch.

Jack sticking Daniel in it with Sam by saying Sha're was a gift could be amusing, except the conversation gets cut off before Daniel can explain. It annoys me, because Daniel not "accepting" Sha're was actually the point? It's kind of important! I assume he does tell Sam the whole story later.

"Unless we want to get ourselves a really bad reputation, I just think we should avoid shooting the first people we meet on a new planet" is a nice follow up to Daniel's sarcastic "well that would have been an excellent reason to shoot everyone" from the film. At this point, Daniel doesn't appear to be carrying a weapon other than a knife. Oh, how that will change!

The Chulak priests speak "a derivation of Arabic" and something else - the Goa'uld language is meant to be similar to Abydonian, which is based on Ancient Egyptian. Of course modern Egyptian is an Arabic dialect that came much later, but perhaps we are to assume Goa'uld - or at least the Chulak vernacular - evolved along similar lines.

Jack unable to shoot Sha're when she stands in front of Apophis is a nice movie callback.

The final cut has a good extra scene between Sam and Daniel where he is quite delusional thinking Sha're might just be drugged, and Sam tries to talk sense into him. Daniel's blind optimism against Sam's pragmatic realism will be an important aspect of their relationshio going forward.

Shoulder pat no. 4!

Teal'c P.I. sees Skaara talking to Jack and starts putting pieces together - the weapons from the opening scene, the weapons on Abydos + Jack's watch, and Daniel helpfully supplying the Earth glyph.

Alexis Cruz is committed to the film pronunciation of Sha’uri, bless him.

“But you are a great warrior, we defeated Ra together!” Skaara’s faith in Jack is so pure.

Skaara gets a shoulder pat too.

"Another fine day on planet Kawalsky" - This line was removed from the final cut! What a tragedy. I get the sense Brad Wright feels a bit cringe about the campier aspects of the show, but it's part of the charm! To be fair Ferretti was more of the wisecracker in the movie rather than Kawalsky, but I love that show Kawalsky is a little goofy.

I'm sorry, what is this silver monstrosity? I guess a sliver of credit that after the nudity not going for a sexy alien outfit, but this is a hate crime. I also have a very high tolerance, and even affection for, silly Stargate headgear, but there's camp and then there's ugly.

Peter Williams as Apophis though: 10/01, no notes.

"They're going to choose...who will be the children of the gods." I do love it when they say the title of the thing in the thing.

The subtle moment where Teal'c motions that Jack should kneel is a nice setup - Skaara being very reluctant and angry about kneeling, and being the last to do so, is nice movie continuity. Skaara really gets shortchanged by the show after this episode.

"How much would I remember if you chose me?" I wonder if Daniel ever thinks that maybe him drawing the attention of the Goa'uld contributed to Skaara getting chosen. You know, just to really lay on the angst and guilt.

So the premise is that these Apophis underlings are choosing hosts for their children who are symbiotes ready for implantation, which doesn't really fit with what we learn about Goa'uld queens/reproduction later. We also learn later that Skaara is taken as a host for Apophis's son Klorel which doesn't sqaure with these two choosing him.

Headcanon time! This is actually Zipacna who we meet later arguing for Klorel at Triad - different actor, of course, but he wears a similarly silly hat. So Amaunet now has access to all of Sha're's memories of Skaara and she and Apophis decide that he will make a good host - maybe she also likes the idea of a family resemblance between herself and Klorel (I think we can assume he is also Amaunet's son?). But Apophis doesn't want anyone to know he's choosing a host for his offspring, so sends Zipacna out to do it for him.

This makes sense of Klorel later claiming that Apophis chose his host, and also gives backstory to Zipacna showing up in Pretense. And in the scene, the Goa'uld make a very quick decision to take Skaara, while the rest get very grossly examined people before choosing.

Shoulder pat no. 5!

"I have nowhere to go." Teal'c turning on his brother Jaffa to save a roomful of people, not expecting to survive himself, really hits.

"For this, you can stay at my place." hee!

Jack not wanting to hear it when Teal'c tells him Skaara is no longer himself is a turnabout of the earlier scene with Daniel. Not so flip now it's your Emotional Support Abydonian, are you Jack?

Kawalsky getting Goa'ulded doesn't seem to hurt as much as Sha're's - because the symbiote isn't mature, or because Amaunet is particularly sadistic?

Soon to be SG-1 posing for their album cover.

It was the late 90's when tvs were tiny, so everyone had to stand uncomfortably close.

And we end with shoulder pat no. 6!

#stargate rewatch #stargate sg1 #stargate 1x01 #children of the gods #jack o'neill #daniel jackson #sam carter #teal'c #sha're #daniel x sha're #jlf posts

[bropunzeling]

Since you say you love to chatter, I hope you don't mind being asked a few questions :)

what's a scene/detail/piece of dialogue etc that you really wanted to include in [fic of your choice], but you couldn't find room for? here's your chance!

if you had to write an epilogue (or sequel!) to any of your fics (that you are NOT currently planning on writing an epilogue for), which would it be and what would happen?

for the ships you're currently writing about (and have written for in general), is there usually one character you like more than the other? (will you tell us who? has it ever changed?)

what's a ship/fic idea you want to read about but don't want to write yourself? maybe somebody will be inspired!

share anything you'd like about a wip!

aw thank you anon! especially for the opportunity to procrastinate on working on my current wip :) answers under the cut:

some dialogue that i ultimately cut from the spain scene in marriage bets where they were having tapas (originally there was going to be ALL this flirting over the tapas and then it went on too long so i got straight to the questions):

"You're not going to eat that?" "Hey, I tried it." "You're so American." "It's the texture--" "Such a wimp." "I'm sure plenty of people aren't into eating octopus." "Uh-huh."

if i had to write an epilogue or sequel:

oh gosh. i think a lot about the one where marriage bets matthew and leon get married for real for real, with suits and their families present and everything. it WOULD involve matthew finally telling brady that he was not, in fact, the first tkachuk to get married. the other one i think about is, of course, rat baby in a cup. she reigns eternal.

is there a character in a ship that i like more than the other?

i think it's hard for me to enjoy a ship where i don't actually like one side of it! that said, there are definitely characters where i find it much easier to get into their headspace than others. i've probably said this before, but leon is such a straight line thinker and so easy for me to get that for a long time it was hard for me to try and write anything from matthew pov because his is a little more twisty-turny. they're both equally complex! but it requires different skills to get the effect i want, which is normally the pov character not having a clue what the other one is thinking. it's a lot easier to have leon misreading matthew than the other way around. except now of course i've written a lot from matthew pov so finding my way back to leon pov has been a challenge.

a ship/fic i want to read but don't want to write:

god what DON'T i want to read. lmao. i would love for someone to write a good achy jamie/trevor post-trade fic. i would love for someone to write a long slow friends-to-lovers matthew/sasha fic! i would REALLY love a brady/quinn future fic. especially if it features divorced brady. i feel like future fic especially is a trope/concept that i just feel less comfortable writing so whenever someone else writes it i eat it up with a spoon :)

share anything you like about a wip:

well the wip is going SO SLOW and is VERY HARD for me because im challenging myself by writing a slow burn and cant rely on sex scenes to do the chemistry work for me this time rip rip. but here is a wee snippet:

“Draisaitl. Tkachuk,” Coach says, gesturing at the starting line.

Leon gets ready, bracing his stick over his thighs. He’s already raced Jordan and Gourde—beat Jordan, beat Gourde—but he hasn’t had to go against Tkachuk yet. Hasn’t had to do much of anything with Tkachuk yet. Yesterday they were at the other end of the line from each other, or opposite sides of the rink. It had lulled Leon into a false sense of security.

Now, though, Tkachuk is watching him with that way that he has, like—

One time, while making kebabs, Leon got a splinter from the bamboo skewer under his nail. It hurt like a bitch, had him cursing for five minutes until Jenna told him to stop squirming and tweezed it out. The splinter had been miniscule, almost impossible to see, and Leon had wondered how something so tiny could be so aggravating and painful, would make him do anything just to get it to stop.

That’s how it feels when Tkachuk looks at him. How it’s always felt. Like his gaze is digging in under Leon’s skin, until Leon’s entire body is red and inflamed. It makes Leon want to scratch at his shoulders, his chest, until he can finally tear Tkachuk out.

#ask #thank u anon! very sweet to let me ramble to you

[cleavetheclover]

Any Nighttime in Las Vegas spoilers/hints/tidbits to keep us fed? 👀

Nighttime in Las Vegas - author notes on future updates!!

Okay first of all, thank you for the ask!! I am extremely honored by your investment in the fic 🥰

Note: I am not sure how heavy you wanted the spoilers to be when you submitted the ask, so I kept it on the more vague side. I hope this satisfies what you were looking for!

This work is my most ambitious to date and has been an inspiring and invigorating challenge. The effort I have put into this work has been enourmous, and I am incredibly grateful for all the attention the work has gotten. Thank you!! 🎉💕

More info below cut! Non-spoiler (chapter 5) updates first, then Major Spoilers (chapters 6, 7, and 8) next.

Chapter 5 (most recently uploaded chapter):

- Chapter 5 (specifically scenes 11/Medbay and 12/Brimstone’s Office) currently being re-written. I thought that scene 11 was pretty sloppily written and there was a lot of key info that didn’t get properly communicated, and the changes are intended to communicate the plot line with better storytelling/use of characters and dialogue. The major changes in scene 11 are complete and I am doing minor fixes to scene 12 to keep the story consistent.

- To elaborate on the above, scenes 11 and 12 establish that: 1) Omen was rescued per his Distress Call, and Cypher was not. 2) Omen needed to be revived, and is still injured. 3) Fade has been sent on a Search and Rescue mission for Cypher. 4) in discussion with Sage and Brimstone, it is discovered that the mission Cypher and Omen were on was not approved, and that the documents Omen has access to are not in the database and likely forged. 5) Killjoy performs an assessment showing that there have been no external threats / sources of tampering that could be responsible for this incident. 6) Sage and Brimstone bring up Cypher’s history of secret missions, defying orders, and otherwise sketchy business. 7) Omen insists that he was not aware of this history, and asks to compare his own mission history to that of the database to see what else he has been unknowingly doing. He finds three other missions of suspicious origin.

Chapter 6 (in the works):

- Chapter 6 will begin with Cypher’s return. Brimstone interrogates him about his actions and motivations and Cypher attempts to gaslight gatekeep girlboss his way out of guilt, but it backfires and only makes him look worse.

- He does not tell the entire truth about himself, but he specifies that Omen is innocent. Omen is thus cleared of all charges of treason.

- Omen, having discovered that Cypher has lied to him about their joint missions, is furious. He has conflicting loyalties— one to the Protocol, his home, his entire livelihood; and to Cypher, his mission partner, his protector and protected, and his good friend. To have one betray the other is world-shattering.

- Cypher is placed under arrest at HQ. His duties are distributed among the other Agents including Sova, Fade, and Killjoy.

- Omen overhears a conversation where Cypher is begging Fade to let him go with her to Las Vegas, stating that she knows what happens to him there and he can’t let the same happen to her. Fade brushes him off and says her Radiant abilities will ensure her safety.

- Omen visits Cypher in jail to confront him. An argument ensues.

- At the end of the argument, Cypher tells Omen to bring the Box to Viper. He thinks she can help.

Chapter 7 (not drafted):

- chapter 7 deals with the fallout between Cypher and Omen.

- Cypher is in jail, but as you might imagine, he tries to break out. He manages to escape Headquarters without setting off any alarms, because well, he built them himself and can take them apart just as easily.

- By happenstance, Omen sees him escape through the portal at headquarters but is unable to stop him. He follows Cypher through the portal.

- Cypher reveals some information about his past, i.e. everything he didn’t say during his interrogation.

- When Omen realized that he can’t convince Cypher to come back to the Protocol on his own, he shoots him neatly in the head and princess-carries his body back to the Medbay.

Chapter 8

- cypher realizes he is stuck in HQ jail again. Screaming crying throwing up (RIP babygirl but he did it to himself)

- Omen takes the box to viper. He tells her outright not to lie, he’s already had enough of Cypher’s bullshit.

- Sabine tells him what she knows.

More notes:

I am doing my best to publish chapters that are well-planned and well-refined. Unfortunately, having ADHD + fretting over details 24/7 means I am not a very speedy writer, and I apologize for the long waits between chapters.

The document I have in my computer is much more extensive and includes dialogue and additional scenes, but I’d classify those as major spoilers and didn’t include them here. I also have plot points planned out for the rest of the fic, but those are major spoilers in addition to being undecided/malleable so I didn’t want to set them in stone here.

#nighttime in Las Vegas #author notes #cypher valorant #omen valorant #valorant cypher #valorant omen #cyphmen #shadowire #cypher/omen #omen/cypher #cypher #omen #fanfiction #valorant #valorant fanfiction

[stardancerluv]

A Time to Love and to Fight

Chapter Nineteen

Summary: Changes swirl around Enjolras and his girl

Notes/Warnings: 18 & Older, please! PV Sex, lots angst, un-aliving /shooting someone mention, I re-wrote this 3 times! (If you want to know the other versions, just ask) I chose to veer a bit from the original story since this storyline/fanfic already has. I felt I still did right by what the character Enjolras would do. (No hate, please!) There are two collages, in the 1st one there is a fan-art version of Lachesis drawn by Amber Southerly. In the second, I used a couple in bed to stand in for that scene…that is a face claim! The dialogue between Enjolras & Govroche is taken from the mini-series!

Thank you, for reading! (It’s a long chapter) Be nice! Feedback is welcome! Want to be tagged, please let me know! ❤️ and of course…Enjoy!

Lachesis - The Greek fate who controlled the thread of life. She has become important to Enjolras & Y/N.

“Mon coeur, mon amour... mon ange.” - My heart, my love, my angel.

“Mon ange peut goûter le bonheur qu'est un baiser de toi?” - “My angel can taste the happiness that is a kiss from you?”

There are at 9 more chapters!

Your eyes were fierce as you turned, strode right over to him. “You shot a man.” The tone of your voice pierced him.

Taking a step back, he pushed the door closed behind him. He did not wish the others to grow curious. He had already faced enough questions, the night you showed up. He knew there would be more.

Rocking forward on his heals he walked up to you. You didn’t move.

“That man took a shot at Marius.”

When you didn’t say a word. He grabbed you chin. A wince washed over your face. He swallowed at the sight of it. He never wanted to cause you harm. With more of a gentle touch, and with no thought of his hand that was wrapped up, he brought your face up as he spoke.

“It was men like that, who dragged you into an alley.” He spat out.

Your lip trembled.

“I’ve seen men like that abuse and kill innocent men and women. He missed Marius the first time he aimed. I wasn’t about to give him a second chance.”

“You’re right, you’re right….” Your words were entangled in your breath. He could see your destress.

He could feel as you inhaled.

“I was just so scared.” It was then he felt as you wrapped your arms around him.

He would never tire of the feel of you. Wrapping his own arms around you, he sighed, holding you very close.

******

He was grateful. You had not run in terror at his brutal act. He was grateful that none of his comrades had not come to disturbed the two of you.

In that small room, against a bureau he leaned. You were cradled between his legs, your head resting on his chest. With his good hand, he gently ran a hand soothingly up and down your back. His wounded hand laid on his thigh.

Neither of you spoke. The silence laid like a blanket over the two of you.

“Mon ange, you give a moment?” He did not want to part from you. Right now all felt right. But he had made his mind up, he had to act on his decision.

“Only if you finally tell me what happened?” Your lovely hands were gentle as they lightly grazed the scarf that was wound tightly around his hand.

He pressed his lips together and nodded. “There was a scuffle during the funeral. At one point a solider tried to cut me down with his sword.”

“Oh, Enjolras my love.” You gently cupped his hand.

He nodded. “He caught the back of it. I am grateful, that I still have it. And I am certain, that only a scar will remain. My hand though in pain still moves like a hand should.”

His heart squeezed at the tenderness you then bestowed upon him. You pressed some gentle kisses here and there.

Quietly as he felt your soft kisses, he thanked Lachesis, for the gift that was you.

“Now, my ange I really must have my moment. Will you give it to me?”

A shadow of a smile fluttered on your face as you looked up at him. “Yes, of course.”

*****

Grabbing a small knife, he went to where he had seen the thread earlier. Relief filled him when he realized, he did not have to slice the pieces he found.

“As I twine this thread I wish for us to be together.” Enjolras wished silently in his heart. These feelings were new to him.

He had never been terribly sentimental. Half the time when he had heard or saw Marius being so lovesick, he had found it foolish. That all changed the rainy night you came stumbling into his life. After that mere walk in the rain something changed in him.

Walking back to you, he twined and tied and twisted the scarlet thread. He managed to make a delicate ring, easily he then made a small knot. The knot resembled a small blossom. He was pleased, his fingers remembered how to make such a small memento out of thread. He slipped the small ring into his pocket.

Opening the door, a smile played on this lips as he watched you fidget with your gloves. There were a few things he had come to observe in you, this one he found to be very endearing.

In a few strides, he was by your side. As you turned, smiling he knew what he was doing was right. Sinking down on his left knee, gently he cupped your hand with both of his.

“Enjolras?”

He smiled softly up at you. “Mon age, before you came stumbling into my life the matters of the heart I left for others.”

He swallowed, his heart once again thudded hard in his chest.

“I had always believed love was a foolish folly. I was and am no fool.”

Your smile was as strong as the sun on a summer’s day. Gently, he squeezed your hand.

“As we grew familiar, intimate I realized that you were the one my heart had been waiting for.”

“Enjolras, what ?”

He could feel as you trembled, your eyes twinkled. He caress the back of your hand with his thumb.

“Mon amour, years ago I pledged my body, my intellect for the betterment of France. As I am here before you, I wish to give you my love, my heart.”

“Oh Enjolras, I accept. Yes! Yes!”

He leapt up and pulling you close, he held you to him. Nothing felt so right as it did just then. With a sigh, he inhaled deeply of the sweet scent, that was uniquely yours. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“I have a small token to seal this gift, love.”

You blinked. “You do?”

He nodded. “Yes.”

Easily, he took your left hand. First, he pressed a kiss just above where the end of the glove sat. “Let us remove this. Yes?”

You nodded. “Yes.”

He took a step so that he could place the ring he had twined more easily upon your finger. Once he had pulled the glove from you, he pressed another kiss this time to your knuckles. Slipping his hand into his pocket, he grabbed the ring.

“It is terribly humble.”

He whispered, then with the outmost care he slipped the scarlet ring onto your finger. Easily, placing it so the small flower sat on top.

“Though just as Lachesis drew our threads together, her thread allowed me to give you this symbol of my love.”

“Oh Enjolras, I love it.” And once again you were in his arms.

******

“Today we will remember those among that we lost. They were will always be remembered. In our hearts there will be men like Father Mabeuf, or ladies like Mademoiselle Eponine.” He cleared his throat. “But we will almost celebrate life and new beginnings.”

You smiled from where you stood. You were head to toe in a dark cloak.

“And we must remember, that last night we were able to push back the Royal army. We can and will do this again.”

Cheers rung through the warehouse.

*****

Quietly, he eyed his hands. They always trembled before a fencing match. Those days felt like they barely existed. They were like out of a dream. Now, they trembled.

Grantaire and Courfeyrac stood on either side of him while he waited for you. Hearing the muffled sounds from the warehouse, glancing in that direction a smile blossomed on his lips.

You were as lovely as a summer’s day. The dress you chose was lovely and delicate. Very much like you. Though, he was learning with how you handled the guards and then last night you were far stronger then he would have ever guessed. You were certainly the person, he was relieved that he would get to live the rest of his days with.

As you drew closer, for a moment he shut his eyes and inhaled. In his heart, he gave a moment to Lachesis. He gave her his sincere gratitude to experience this type of love. Exhaling, he opened his eyes and his heart leapt. You were beside him.

“Hello angel.” He whispered.

He offered you his hand. You took it and together you both faced, the gentlemen who would be marrying two of you.

********

Inwardly, you trembled and tried desperately to not cry as your mana slipped the buttons on the back of your dress. With great excitement, you spoke of peace that you could only wish would fall over the city. Your passionate words had been enough you convince your mama and Greta to allow you to enjoy a day at the park.

Once she slipped the final hook through the eyelet, impulsively you turned and hugged your mama.

“Oh mama.” You cried. Her frame was fragile. It had always been warm and soft while your father was alive. She was a wisp of the woman she had once been.

She gave you a squeeze. “My dear daughter, I am better. You no longer have to fret over me.” You nodded.

If life, if times were different Enjolras would have courted you. She would have found him dashing and intelligent like father. Father and him would have shared glasses of wine while debating life and the books that filled his library.

Instead, you were getting married in a warehouse Enjolras and his comrades had taken over. There would be no grand ceremony or celebration. You would have loved for your mama to know you were now a woman.

You pulled back and nodded, “I know mama. That fills me with immense joy.” You hoped she did not see the tears the filled your eyes. The lump that formed in your throat made it hard to breath. “It is just, I missed these simple acts of you helping me to choose a dress.” You smiled.

Enjolras and the men had already pushed off the army, they could do it again. Next time, you would bring him home. Mama, had a right to meet the man who made you realize all those books father had read to you and you had read; truly existed.

You reached behind her and grabbed your book. You held it up.” “I must not forget this.”

*******

Before leaving the house, you grabbed your cloak, its edges danced around your ankles. Simply walking in this dress would cause too much of a stir.

The walk to the warehouse today did not take as long as it had in the past. It gave your heart great comfort.

As you walked in, Enjolras stood apart from everyone. He was on one of the catwalks high above, it creaked under his weight.

Gavoche, came over to you. He smiled at you with a flair that uniquely was his, held out to you a small bouquet of little blue and white flowers.

“Gavoche!” You held a suprised hand to your mouth. It was lovely.

“Monsieur Enjolras gave me a mission this morning to find flowers that matched the blue scarf you wore the night we all met you.”

“You remembered?”

He nodded. “I may have wanted you tied up if you were a spy but you were the loveliest lady, I had the pleasure of escorting home.”

You smiled and took the bouquet. “You escort a lot of ladies home?”

He chuckled. “No, you are the only one and you are the loviest, by far.”

“Well, thank you so much.”

“You are so welcome, Lady Y/N.” He gave a small bow.

You were about to say how you were not a real lady when a hush came over the room.

It was then Enjolras began to speak. Giving him his your complete attention you smiled up at him. His words stirred a warmth in you, they dried your tears and melted the lump in your throat.

Yes, now they would marry but with their assured victory, you knew you’d be able bring him home to mama. As your eyes met, your heart filled even more with happiness over what the future would hold for the two of you. Lachesis, had been truly kind as she twined the threads of yours and Enjolras’s lives. Bringing a gloved hand over your heart, you thanked her.

*******

You were one of the angels he had seen in works of fine art. Only you were his angel in life. Relief filled him, that with the allowance his mother still sent along to him and with what he out aside, while still managing to hold onto alot for when it would be needed, he had found a small simple silver ring.

He smiled as Courfeyrac opened the small pouch and handed him that silver ring.

Your eyes grew as they met his.

He nodded. “I pledge my heart and love to you, till my last breath.” Then gently as if it had been made for you it slipped into its rightful place on your finger.

“Oh Enjolras,” His heart trembled with his love for you as he heard you speak. “My love. I pledge my heart and love for all of time.”

With hands joined, he turned with you once more to the man performing the ceremony.

“I offer this final blessing. May the air that gives them life and the love that has blossomed in their hearts now beat as one; till old age comes and envelops them in one final embrace.”

Cheers bounced off the walls of the small room. Turning, Enjolras gave his dearest comrades, his dearest friends Courfeyrac, Grantaire and Gavoche; a small smile and a nod. To know they were there at his side, he appreciated. Not a moment too late, Despiat popped his head into add to the sentimental wishes for the two of them.

“Mon coeur, mon amour... mon ange.” He whispered, cupping your cheek he closed the last of the space between the two of you. And inhaling deeply, his lips met yours in the first kiss as man and wife.

*******

Holding the skirt of your dress and your other arm around Enjolras. Together you both twirled, smiled and chuckled to the instruments and uproariously singing that filled the room. Spirits were high. Everyone was happy. Toasts were made, tankards clanked and candlelight flickered and twinkled.

*******

Earlier, while everyone feasted on what Despiat had made for the two of you and the others that evening from the kitchen of his pub. Laying on some crates, boards that had been carried and food and drink laid on them. Seeing a scout, slipped in from the shadows that lingered in alleys or corners between buildings he parted from you only this once to speak with him. You had tried to rise from one of the few chairs that had not been used to reinforce the barricade but had assured to remain and continue to enjoy the food and drink.

“Are you absolutely sure of this?”

The man dabbed his face with his handkerchief. He nodded swallowing. “They are hoping that by striking late tomorrow night, you will have grown complacent with your minor victory. Hopefully drunk on or even they dare hope in a deep slumber.”

Enjolras, paced. “They were will be certainly be surprised.” He smirked. He went over to the man, tell Despiat you may have whatever you wish. Please eat well. We will all need our strength.”

Now, he knew they would surely win once again. He could taste their victory. He strode out and on he again joined in the festivities of the evening. Sitting beside you, he smiled. All was as it should be in his life.

You reached out and touched his arm. He laid a hand over yours. “Alright is right with the moon and stars, my love.” He assured you.

******

Whispering to Courfeyrac and Grantaire, he had them make sure the windows and doors were fastened for he did not wish anything to escape. Once they were done, he stood and touch wobbly with his elation over the victory that was within his grasp, he stood on a chair.

He glanced down at you. He took a breath.

“Gentlemen, ladies word has come. By this time tomorrow, perhaps even later the army has planned their attack.”

Gasps filled the air.

“Do not let worry plague you. We know their plans. We can prepare and be ready. So drink, be merry but rest and we shall get ready to finish them!”

Cheers and clanking of tankards filled the room.

******

You placed your flowers on the table. Your fingers trembled so much that it took longer then usual to unfasten your cloak but you did and hung it on one of the hooks on the wall. Nervousness, coursed through you. “Is it wrong that I’m nervous?”

Enjolras paused before lighting one of the candles. He shook his head. “No, angel it’s not.” He lit the candle and lit the remaining few before he came over to you.

He came over to you and easily he pulled you close. “Forgive me, for in all the revelry I did not take a moment to tell you how beautiful you were today.”

You flushed, you glanced between the two of you before meeting his warm eyes. “Your eyes told me.”

A soft pleased sound came from him. “I am glad.”

You sighed closing your eyes as be cupped your cheek. “Mon ange peut goûter le bonheur qu'est un baiser de toi?”

Your eyes fluttered opened. “Yes, my love. My sweet husband.” You flushed.

“Oh I had never wanted to hear those words and yet, from you they are more lovely then the song of a bird.”

Your eyes met then and just as you took a breath, you felt the softness of his lips. The scruff of his goatee was comforting. Your arms wrapped around him, his followed. He was so solid, warm and safe.

*******

Gently, he lowered himself half on half off of you. “My dear wife.” You flushed with the kisses and caresses. But he was always be the honorable man you loved. He gently traced the line of your cheek. “I am aware that it is know it is tradition, for us to become one tonight. It allows our hearts to beat together to fulfill our bond of marriage and love. But with the excitement of the day, if you wish to wait and become one another night I can stop now. I am will never become a brut.”

You turned and his kissed his open palm. “No my love, I long to feel you.”

*******

Easing himself up from the bed, he paused as he stood beside. “You are so lovely.” He whispered.

In the flickering candlelight he could see a flush dust your cheeks. “Angel, you will have to grow accustomed to my compliant or I fear you will always be blushing.” He smiled.

“Maybe one day, right now I like the idea of being your blushing bride always.”

“Shall I Enjolras? Shall I shed chemise?”

He nodded. “Please. And I shall shed these.” Then carefully, since his hand still ached terribly he removed his breeches.

“You steal my breath, Enjolras.” Your soft voice reached his ears and his heart sped up.

“It is only fair since looking at you do the same to me.”

Bracing himself on the bed, he settled between your legs. “You have enraptured my heart.” Something, he never thought would happen or allow to happen. But you were special.

A soft sound came from him as he wrapped his hand around himself. He was incredibly aroused. The sight of you as the candlelight poured over your curves was almost too much for him.

Gently, he slipped his among your silken folds. They reminded him of roses that grew at his university. On the early mornings the petals would be kissed with dew. A soft moan that came you made his stomach tighten.

“You moans will undo me, angel.”

Biting inside of his cheek, he gently slid into you. Then his own moan filled his room.

Moving just so, he held you close. With his heart thudding hard, his lips grazed yours. “Pardon me angel, but I must tell you. I will always be grateful you came stumbling in that rainy night.”

You reached up and cupped his cheek. “It is the day, I truly started to live.”

A twist of pleasurable pain filled him; for there was part of him that felt the same. He kissed your palm, before he was able to find his rhythm and began sliding in and out of your warmth.

You both moved. No words were needed, just the sounds of pleasure from the two of twirled and mingled between the two of you. Your hearts echoed each other. Everything was exquisite.

Both of you burned as the passion grew. His curls became unruly as sweat blossomed on his scalp. Your strands, clung to your face they were as wild as a stallion’s mane. He drew closer and your lips met and the kisses matched the passion already between the two of you.

******

You took his hand and placed it over your heart, it thudded hard in your chest. “I will never allow my love for you to wane.”

“It never will, for till my dying day I will love you.”

He moved his hand up in gentle caress before he was able to cup your cheek. It felt as if the two of you sealed your words with a kiss.

*******

Fright gripped you and you woke. You could not understand the fear, no night terror had struck you but it had taken a hold of your heart.

You sat there in the darkness. A tear escaped one of your eyes and slid down you cheek. You pressed against your heart hoping to snuff out the fear, the pain.

“Angel?” Enjolras’s voice was thick from slumber. “What plagues you?”

“I don’t know.” You wept.

“Come let me hold you till the dawn.”

His arms were warm and strong as he held you. It was only then did you feel your anguish, begin to diminish.

******

“As the sun rises, we prepare. Will dispatch each royal solider. They taste our bravery and feel fear. They will quake in their shiny boots.” One of the platforms on the barricade, Enjolras spoke. His voice was rich with dedication.

Cheers erupted from those that gathered.

“Now let us prepare for what will be coming at sundown. We will not stop till the last gaps are filled and the barricades are secure. All of our bullets will be so made and rationed between all of us. And arm yourself with a blade. We will fight to the last of them.”

Once again the cheers erupted. Encouraging slaps on the back were given and fists shot skyward.

“Now go and prepare!”

You felt at a loss of what to do. You helped where you could. You brought cloths where the guns and pistols were being cleaned. With the aid of one of the other ladies, you secured pieces of furniture and whatever else you could get your hands on. All of if made the barricades stronger. A quiet seriousness fell over everyone. There were only murmurs of greetings. Eyes met silently.

Gavroche’s footfalls and the shortness of this breath, sounded louder. Seeing him you realized it was the first you had seen him since waking; that was a few hours now. You noticed others looked over or even glanced in his direction, but not really spoke aloud.

You watched as him and Enjolras disappeared into one of the smaller rooms. A knot formed in your stomach.

You felt as if a shadow that you could not run away from fell over you.

*******

Enjolras, patted Gavoche reassuringly on the back as he walked along side him into the small room. The young man was pale. And out of breath. This worried him.

“Son, what did you see?” He turned and faced him.

He chewed his bottom lip before he spoke. “It’s all over, comrade.” He swallowed. “Hundreds of soldiers are getting ready to attack.” When his eyes finally met his, they were watery. “And most of the barricades have been destroyed.”

He knew this day would come. He had been preparing for it. He would fight to the death. But you, you he worried about.

“Are you alright?” He was warmed once again by his bravery. He was a good kid.

“Me?” An easy smiled played on his face, though his eyes spoken of readying himself, Enjolras assumed. “Never better.”

“Go grab a scrap of the bread and cheese. Don’t breath a word of this. Let me address everyone.”

He nodded. “Of course.” He ran out.

Enjolras felt as if the air was stolen from him. Your terror had been prophetic. He would not let you die here. He would not make you watch if he were to die either.

“Enjolras?” Your voice floated through the air like a bird’s song. It ripped at him.

He would not let his anguish consume him.

@aftertheglitterfades @corrodedcoffn @dealswiththedevilsblog @randomstory56 @pl1nfa1 @phantomxoxo @ladybug0095 @the-iridescent-phoenix @maryan028 @netusha @kindablackenedsuperhero @amethyst-serenade @crazyworldofsiani @moondev1l @eddiethebloodiedhand @lluviamg06 @samunson83 @craftyhufflepuff @julieteagk @little-wormwood @gretavankleep37

#joseph quinn #joseph quinn fanfic #joseph quinn fanfiction #bbc!enjolras #bbc! enjolras imagine #bbc enjolras fanfiction #joseph quinn imagine #bbc! les miserable #enjolras #enjolras x fem!reader #enjolras x you #enjolras x y/n #bbc les mis #bbc les miserable fanfic #bbc les miserable fanfiction #joe quinn #joe quinn imagine #joe quinn fanfic #joe quinn fanfiction #a time to love and to fight #part 19 #bbc enjolras angst #bbc enjolras fluff #bbc enjolras smut

[nedjemetsenen]

Why do Fanfic writers generally hate “constructive” criticism?

This is a topic that comes across my dash a couple times a month, but those posts generally focus on how unsolicited criticism is rude. Today, I wanted to take a moment to talk about the ways that it’s also generally useless even if you’re trying to be helpful. To do this, I will be using examples from my own comment section, but please do not seek those comments out. This post is about informing, not about creating a hate mob.

Issue One: You don't know if your criticism is already known

No story is perfect. There will always be flaws. Sometimes you find a flaw that the author can improve on. Sometimes you pick up on something that the author accepted as a flaw during the writing process for whatever reason. It may have been because they're writing for fun. It may have been because they liked the flawed version of the story better than the story without the flaw. It may be because they genuinely didn't know how to fix it, but still wanted to tell the story flaw and all.

To give an example of this, here’s an excerpt from a truly lovely comment where the person also tried to give some helpful feedback:

you did a fantastic job with the characters you altered to fit the story. They were mostly rounded and felt like whole people instead of cardboard cut-outs. However, this made the characters that you didn't change feel very flat. [List of characters] often felt like window dressing, like they were included solely because they were part of the original show.

This is exactly why those characters showed up in that fic and the issue of them being window dressing isn’t something that I introduced. It’s a flaw in the original work. To fix this issue, I would have cut these characters or merged them into one character. But this wasn’t original fiction. It was fanfiction, so I decided to sacrifice quality for the sake of honoring the source as it felt wrong to remove these guys when they’re a classic part of the roster. I also actively chose to not develop them more as it would have killed the pacing and added nothing to the story I was trying to tell. There are characters that I arguably should have given more screen time to in that fic, but these were not those characters.

Issue Two: Timeliness

Unless the story is newly published, you have no idea if your criticism is still useful. Even if it is newly published, how long has the fic been going for? Are you critiquing a chapter from 3 years ago or last week? Unless it’s the latest chapter, you don’t know. Even if it is the latest chapter, you don’t know when it was written. Sometimes people find an old work of theirs and just post it without editing because they don’t want to edit and they know people will enjoy the story as-is. Sometimes people write the whole fic and then post it week by week while they work on the next one.

I recently had someone ask me for some feedback on a section of dialogue and I pointed out an area for potential improvement. The person who asked for the feedback has read some of my stuff and pointed out that I’d used a similar technique in a fic and they were absolutely correct. I had. But the fic was a few years old and I simply haven’t yet taken the time to go back and edit all 100k+ of it. I write at least a quarter of a million words every year and that means that I’m always learning. It’s incredibly rare for me to reread an old piece of mine without finding something to edit. It won’t always be something major, but it’s there. Waiting. Taunting me.

Along similar lines, if you're pointing out a flaw that's specific to the story, I'm not sure what you're expecting to happen next. While some writers go back and edit old works (I certainly have), a lot of writers consider older works done and prefer to focus on new ones.

Issue Three: Most people are shockingly bad at giving good constructive criticism.

Constructive criticism is a skill that you have to learn and practice. It’s also genuinely difficult to learn as it's the difference between helping a person tell the story that you want to read and helping them tell the best version of the story that they want to tell. The first is not good crit, but it is the crit that most people give.

There are times when I’ll beta for a fic and think “that character would never do that”, but that’s terrible feedback because I’m imposing my version of the character over the author’s take on the character and they’re not trying to tell a story with my headcanons. They’re using theirs and my job as an editor/beta is to accept that and help them tell their story as best they can.

I've also been given feedback like this. Here’s an excerpt from a comment where someone pointed out something that they didn’t like in one of my fics:

it's cute to see him like this once in a while but he's a grown man and "adorable" feels a little out of place in this situation

This is utterly useless feedback and I will die on that hill. In my opinion, I wrote this character perfectly because this is how I see him. It’s my headcanon and the version of him that you'll see in all of my fics. What’s funny is that I actually think that I got the female lead in this story a bit wrong. I should have toned her down, but this was early in my journey to learn these characters and then we’re back to issue two.

Final Thoughts

If an author asks for constructive criticism, then absolutely feel free to give it to them, but if you've ever wondered why most authors don't, the above is probably why. It's why I only welcome grammatical corrections and historical/cultural accuracy corrections on my own fics. Those are the only comments that I've ever found useful.

There are times when I seek out other types of feedback. I just don't get it from random readers after the story is already published. I get it from select individuals during the writing process and that's the feedback process favored by most writers as it's the one that's most likely to lead to improvement.

If you ever come across a fic that you love, but you feel like it could use an editor, my advice is to leave a comment saying how much you love the story and then offer to beta read (the fandom word for an editor. No I don't know why fandom has a different definition for that word than the definition used in the publishing industry. It just is what it is.) And if you don't want to take the time to beta for someone, that's okay! But if you don't want to make the massive time commitment to truly help the person improve, then maybe don't give unsolicited feedback that's more likely to make them stop writing altogether? I promise you, that person will improve on their own just by writing more. I certainly did! If you read the fanfic that I wrote when I was 13, you'd be shocked by how bad it is compared to my current stuff.

I personally consider that fact a source of pride.

#fandom #writing fanfic #fanfiction #not a call out of any sort #It just seems like people are genuinely confused why fanfic writers don't want feedback and so I figured I'd give my personal logic #I like to improve but I do it in my own manner

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

I don't know if they're the question in here or I'm just here ramble, so I apologize in advance. I'm thinking a lot about Hogwarts Mystery.

I think that jam city really messed up by trying to create so many classmates for MC. if they had focused on the original four or so they could have done something really interesting with parallel arcs to what happened during Jacob's years.

for example we have MC dealing with this constant worry that maybe Jacob wasn't as good as they thought. or the idea that maybe he went crazy maybe he isn't who we thought he was. we also have the MC consistently dealing with visions and people not trusting them. they could grapple with this concept of can they even trust themself. and are they going to turn out like their brother.

Then we have Ben & Rowan and Duncan and Olivia.

Rowan dying in story was very bizarre because it didn't feel well set up in a lot of ways. the idea of them dying is interesting because they have such clear goals but in story it didn't work cuz where did they come from etc etc. but I think it could have worked in a thematic sense especially if we played into the parallel between Duncan and Rowan. If I'm remembering the lore correctly. Duncan and Jacob were best friends looking for the cursed vaults, they also probably got sucked into it a little bit too much at least Jacob did and Duncan must have gone along with it to some extent. Obsession seems to be a family trait and Roman deeply cared for MC. So them dying could play into this concept of history repeating itself.

It also could play into the concept of MC doubting themselves because their best friend is dead.

Moreover it would be even more thematic if Rowan were to come back as a ghost. in canon they didn't finish their goals and they died young, a perfect candidate. I love the idea that maybe there could be an extended arc where MC tries to make it up to Rowan or grapples with the fact that they cause them the state they're in. but we can also have a breaking of the cycle by allowing the MC and Ben a chance to reconcile with Rowan.

I don't know if any of this made sense if you're reading this thank you.

Rambling is quite literally the name of the game on this blog, dear anon. You are always welcome here with questions, comments, ideas, or anything else.

I sort of agree and disagree. I think the large ensemble of creative and interesting characters this game has given us is easily it’s greatest strength. However, there are too many. There are simply too many, more than the game knows what to do with. The developers keep adding more, rather than focusing on the existing cast. They add new characters even after a point where they’d have nothing to do. Victor and Alanza are perhaps the greatest victims of this phenomenon. They could have been cut. It would have changed very little. Honestly, I believe the game could handle far more than four characters, that it was doing just fine for a while with the cast it had, especially during the first half of Year 6 when it seemed like they were done adding brand new characters…but it wasn’t to be. Nonetheless, I’d be interested to see your version of events, where the game focuses on four core characters.

MC’s relationship with Jacob and how they feel about him was a major story development that affected everything about their character and the game’s mystery. Was. Everything about Jacob, including his moral ambiguity, seemed to fade away once he was rescued. He did nothing after that point, apart from a few obligatory appearances that didn’t live up to their full potential. He was there in the Sunken Vault, why did he get no rematch with Rakepick? Or even dialogue with her? Jacob would have served the story a lot better if…and this is going to sound cruel…if he had been the one to die in the Forbidden Forest. Because you’re right, Rowan’s death was weirdly dealt with. MC had barely interacted with them since Year 2.

But I think you’re right. There’s definitely an echo to be found here, between Duncan and Rowan. If Rowan had been present throughout the game’s story, it could have had more impact. I mean, their death was foreshadowed. Under the Imperius Curse, Rowan forced MC to choose between themself and Ben to die. Then there was the priceless line, “I’ll miss you when Madam Rakepick kills you.” The one thing I have to disagree with you on is Rowan coming back as a ghost. If this game wasn’t a prequel and it was possible for them to return and succeed Professor Binns, I suppose that would be one thing. But part of Rowan’s goal is the dramatic irony behind it. From the start, they wanted to be the youngest Professor in Hogwarts history, but we all knew that would never happen. Because we read the books, and Rowan wasn’t there. Beyond that…returning as a ghost is well established in this universe to be something most people don’t do. That it’s only an imitation of existence that people choose because they fear death, and thus never get to know the afterlife. They don’t get to board a train. I don’t think Rowan would do that, and that point is made in the Head Kid TLSQ, my all time favorite quest.

#Rowan Khanna #HPHM Jacob #HPHM Jacob’s Sibling #HPHM Spoilers #Duncan Ashe #Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery #HPHM Analysis

[thedawningofthehour]

Since Shredder and the Krang Invasion don't happen in your story, have you though about incorporating some version of those fight scenes in the fanfic, like Draxum or Galois/Donnie facing off against the Hamatos while using the Shredder/Krang Prime's dialogues? I can imagine the absolute horror/inner turmoil Leo would face if Galois was attacking him and the rest of their family while saying the Krang leader's words if they succeed in offing Draxum. It could even be a fanfic.

I kind of already did that? In the last chapter, (I could barf, it's still the last chapter, Leo's still on top of that freaking roof) some of Draxum's dialogue is lifted directly from Krang Prime. Maybe it was more obvious in the drafts? I basically reversed the entire conversation at one point and cut a lot of Draxum's name-calling, so the allusions might have gotten lost. Him calling Leo 'little pest' is a direct reference to Krang Prime after Leo locked them in the Prison Dimension together, and his whole thing about Galois being better off with him than as Donnie is supposed to be reminiscent of Prime's 'I am a gift' speech.

Does the Shredder even talk much during their big fight? I know he talked to the Foot husbands and Draxum, but during the big flashy fight sequence? I'd have to rewatch the finale. And I generally don't rewatch finales much because it makes me sad lol. (especially when it was cut before its time like Rise was) Incorporating elements of the fight itself, that would be very difficult for a few reasons. One is just the change in media-animation and print are very different mediums and what's entertaining to watch is not necessarily going to be entertaining to read a play-by-play of, and vice versa. A second is that Rise depends heavily on a lot of fantastical elements, and the characters do a lot of shit that should not be physically possible to do. So far, I've been mostly portraying fantastical elements as realistic as possible. I mean, I can certainly try to incorporate some of that in the fic, but that leads into my third reason-I'm not that good at writing fight scenes. I intentionally focus more on the dialogue and emotional aspects to draw attention away from the fact that I suck at it.

In general, I try not to repeat canon dialogue too much and that's something that turns me off when reading other people's fanfics. If I wanted to watch the show, I'd watch the show-I want to see how your fic differs from the canon material. There are exceptions, of course-in my Dishonored fic I had to reuse in-game dialogue very often, because so much of Dishonored is creeping around watching people talk and do stuff, and that familiar dialogue gave readers an anchor in where we were while the protagonist is busy being emo and piling whale meat into his mouth. But even then, I tried to change up the dialogue whenever I could to reflect the differences in the AU from canon. Like, for instance, there's a scene in the vanilla game where a guard and a prostitute are talking about how the city has gone to shit since the empress died, and it kind of trails off into small talk because neither had much more than a passing fondness for the empress. In my AU, the empress was a former street kid who was revealed to be the bastard daughter of the emperor and she focused her rule on reducing poverty and improving the lives of even the poorest of her citizens. It devolves into an argument with another guard insulting her origins and the original guard and prostitute defending her because she was viewed as almost a saint among the commoners.

Oh, but...I'm not going to spoil it, but the main climax of the story-I think you guys are gonna go feral. It's not canon dialogue but you guys will definitely recognize it.

#doth asks

[offbeateurobeatmiku]

ok so i really wanna talk about some of the adaptation choices bones has made in this last arc of mp100 that i really don't like (spoilers below cut for both the latest episodes of mob psycho 100 as well as the manga sections it's adapting from)

ok so just to be clear for this post I'm gonna use the name Shigeo to refer to ???%, and Mob to refer to the Mob we see for like 99% of the show. (it's just easier for me since that's the parlance I've been using since the original manga chapter came out and at this point it'd feel weird to call Shigeo ???%)

Ok so, the main issue I have so far is how they've removed the 2 main pieces of Shigeo characterisation in this arc and it does kinda leave his depiction so far with something of a dehumanising streak that I don't like.

So the first thing they cut is Shigeo's dialogue when he's first getting up after the car accident (I've included the relevant pages below). I feel this is really important as it's the first overt indication that Shigeo is acting with purpose here and has a will of his own separate to Mob's. In addition, I think it's really important because it frames the subsequent sections as Shigeo not just being on a mindless rampage or him acting on Mob's desire to see Tsubomi, but as his own conscious choice to see her regardless of what Mob or anyone else thinks.

Now the second main thing they've changed is Shigeo's reaction to Ritsu trying to destroy the bouquet, where in the show he just kinda pulls up a barrier in the same way as when Teru tries the same thing, in the manga he instead hunches over the bouquet to try to block it with his body. I think the manga humanises Shigeo a lot better here and is just generally a lot more impactful (especially with Ritsu seeing Shigeo's reaction to the bouquet being attacked). In addition, I think it also emphasises how Shigeo does care for and really doesn't want to hurt Ritsu which is why he doesn't use his psychic powers to attack Ritsu here like he easily could have. (This is a little more clear after Shigeo's dialogue to Mob in the next episode/subsequent chapters but I'll not go into it any further because I don't want to spoil it for the anime onlys and the manga readers will know what I'm referring to.)

While I think the anime adaptation is still good and I think Shigeo's dialogue next episode should make a lot of this more explicit (unless they cut it down for time). But I already feel like a lot of the nuances of Shigeo's character have been lost which just makes me a lil sad cuz he's my one of my favourite characters.

Oh also they removed Serizawa's transparent umbrella and made it opaque so it's easier to animate I guess. I'm less annoyed about this because I understand why they did it but I still really prefer the symbolism of the transparent umbrella.

#mob psycho 100 season 3 #mob psycho 100 spoilers #mob psycho spoilers #mp100 spoilers #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #plural mob is something that is so important to me #i can't call Shigeo my little meow meow without people acknowledging he's his own character /hj

[ma-mariarie243]

2023 SUMMARY OF ART!!

The year is almost over, so to celebrate ill show the history of my art throughout this year!!

As you can see, my art has improved a lot hehe

Under the cut will be the full pieces, along with my thoughts on them (this will be long)

JANUARY

my first art of 2023, i really like it. It shows my improvement. During this time, i was learning to draw more anime-like things. I took great inspiration from shizu (or is it shidu?), the main artist for the kagerou project music videos/light novels. This is marry kozakura in her medusa form.

FEBRUARY

my hiyori obsession started rising. Anyway i like this drawing a lot (in a sense that ive improved much). I had a dialogue playing in my head "goodbye hibiya.." while drawing this for some reason (wow i havent said hibiya in a while..). I think about this one often.

MARCH

ENE!!! This pose is from "INTERNET OVERDOSE" by Aiobahn which i had an obsession over at the time. I didint really have a good coloring style during these times but it does feel good to look back at it sometimes. Ene was really my confort character during this time, i ♡ her

APRIL

As you can tell, this isint finnished. This was supposed to be of my oc kokuta and my bestie raine's oc azalea. There have been changes to kokutas design lol (this is also the first time i did side profile.

MAY

this wasnt finished either lol. This is my girl adachi from adachi and shimamura. I really identify with her so i wanted to try drawing her. It never got finished though, and im sad that it didn't

JUNE

haruka!! my boy haruka!!! He is really important to me and i decided to draw him during this time. The hand is surprisingly good?!! I was trying to learn hands during this time. I still used the blur tool wich, i dont think was the best opinion lol

JULY

this is my original character called Undead Angel. I tried to experiment with different color and shading techniques and materials (i used the watercolor brush) I was also expirimenting with undead's design hehe.

AUGUST

this was my kagerou day drawing (aka august 15th). I was using a new drawing program for this one. I drew actor (or takane enomoto) for this drawing hehe. I like how it turned out tbh

SEPTEMBER

for this drawing, i drew marry kozakura again. I also exprimented with another coloring style for this one 😎. I really love how the pose turned out, as that was what i was trying to focus on.

OCTOBER

this was a drawing of one of my friend's deamon slayer oc aijurou. It was a gift for her but i never got to finish it. I was also trying a different shading, highlighting meathod.

NOVEMBER

my crystal p obsession began, so i tried my hand at drawing the illustration of rb but in my style. I really love this one. I really love how len turned out hehe, i was very unsure of how he would turn out.

DECEMBER

My most recent drawing. This is the version without the effects. I love how i drew the backround and i love how i drew len. I like kaito but he looked kind of off to me 😕. The side profile for len brings me joy i love how i drew him so much. Im going to be proud of this one for a while.

#my art #art recap #2023 art summary #vocaloid #kagamine len #art #kaito vocaloid #kagerou project #marry kozakura #hiyori asahina #adachi sakura #original character #takane enomoto #ene enomoto #haruka kokonose #i ♡ my art

[kryptoniteheadcanons]

Thoughts on Black Christmas (2019)

Uhh....brief mentions of sexual assault. Spoilers I guess ...it’s Black Christmas 2019 I don’t think anyone cares.

- I don’t know if I'm going to make a separate post comparing the three of the movies, I might end up saying everything I need to say  in this review. 

- Once again, stop making remakes and sequels that have nothing to do with the original. 

- That snow angle shot was actually pretty cool, I like it. 

- This movie being set at christmas is just as arbitrary as the first one. 

- Yeah, that diva cup thing was pretty awkward. Why did there have to be complete silence while she was putting it in? You couldn’t have used that time for dialogue?

- Oh hi Cary Elwes ….didn’t expect to see you here. 

- God I fucking hate it when professors call on you even though you didn’t raise your hand.

- Also they make Cary’s character so fucking creepy that the first time I saw this I he  assaulted Riley.

- “He totally went off on me because I asked why there were no women, or people of color, or queer people on the syllabus.” Yeah that is weird, most classics lists i’ve seen for colleges, even in 2019, at least have like Frankenstein or a book by one of the Bronte sisters. You have to be trying to not have a woman on the list. (Also: I don’t think they ever mentioned any of their majors? I feel like that would have been a good thing for character building, at least for Riley) 

- Yes, Riley does need to take back her agency and learn how to live her life again, but I don’t think getting up on stage to sing and dance about what is probably one of the most traumatic experiences her life, in front of the person who assualted her, is really the healthiest or safest way to do that. 

- Also, am I the only one that thinks Kris petitioning to get the bust removed from the main hall and that actually happening sounds weird? Maybe it’s just because I went to community college so I don’t know how larger, more established colleges work but that sounds like she was probably petitioning to get the name of the school changed and they just did the bust thing as a ‘compromise’. 

- What did they steal for Kris for the pledges to know that she had to be killed too? 

- Nate, dude, I know you have a migraine or whatever but just leave the room or something. 

- I feel like a lot of real world discussions about feminism and equal rights end up like the one that happened in the kitchen so I think maybe this needs to be said: We do need men in the world, however what we don’t need is bigots and abusers. Misogyny negatively effects all of us, you can talk about the issues men face without having to put down women. 

- I find it really odd that this movie claims to be a more ‘feminist’ version of Black Christmas (I have no idea if the director or writer intended that, maybe it was just a studio or marketing team thing) but they cut out the women’s reproductive rights subplot? How do you even do that? 

- I kind of wish this movie was a full on psychological thriller of Riley having to actually process her trauma instead of being a qausi-slasher movie. 

- Referencing the point above, I feel like the ending is in this weird limbo where it’s not weird enough to clearly be an allegory but it’s also not normal enough to be like, believable. 

- Was Riley’s smile fading at the end because one (or some of them) got out alive or because she realizes that she just destroyed half of the evidence that proves she and Kris didn’t kill all those people?

- Do I think this movie is misandrist propaganda? No. Do I think this movie is great and everyone should see  it? also No. I think its a movie that tried to do something good but fumbled and wound up in a no woman’s land of cringe dialogue and ham fisted morals. 

- also in case anyone was wondering, my favourite character was Jessie, she reminds me of one of my cousins. 

#Thoughts On #thoughts on horror #Black Christmas #Black Christmas 2019 #Feminism I Guess

[koriyue]

the five kasen graphic — process work

hiya!! welcome to another (unnecessarily long and convoluted) breakdown of my latest graphic: the five kasen :>

details under the cut! (initial thoughts + inspiration / rough outline / brainstorming / scrapped designs + concepts / motifs + colours / concluding thoughts)

INITIAL THOUGHTS & INSPIRATION !

this little brainworm began wiggling as soon as i finished playing through the irodori festival,,, seeing all the characters together and interacting made me so happy,, and the story of the five kasen was so interesting that i had to make something for it.

but i had to sit on my hands for a couple of weeks and just. wait patiently. b/c there were no HD images of the darn tapestry, which meant i had to wait for hoyoverse to release it. and! there were still no official pictures of scaramouche i could use... so i was a sitting duck for a long time.

my plan going into this was simple: retell the story of the five kasen. this concept is similar to my kazuha post a couple of months ago, and since i had so much fun doing that, i knew i had to do it again!

ALSO! a huge, ginormous part of me wanting to make this graphic is because i saw the picture of kazuha smiling with the little blushies on his face and i just :( i had to do it :( he was too cute :( i love everyone equally

again, i wanted to experiment with textures and layering to create this. i wanted to use brighter colours and really make the entire thing pop!

overall, this project ended up being 1,328 layers in total and took me around three weeks to complete!

ROUGH OUTLINE !

whenever i retell a story, i always use the original dialogue and script from genshin. usually, i transcribed the story teaser released by mihoyo and begin to edit some of the lines. oftentimes, it's me choosing to scrap a majority of the audio until i'm left with a couple of outstanding lines that become the guiding structure for my graphic. here's what all of my rough planning looked like:

i cross out all of the unwanted text in red.

i use the yellow highlight to emphasize words that may be accompanied by imagery.

every blue box was a potential line that got its own image.

pink is for additional ideas that i may have.

as you can probably tell, a lot of the dialogue i left in the rough outline didn't make it to the final design. i wanted to use imagery to tell the story, and implemented a lot of the text into different motifs! for example, the line "[Suikou] admitted to drinking at the tavern the night before" was kept in the final design. however, i chose to remove "the night before" and implicitly showed that by including a dark background and a moon in that image!

BRAINSTORMING !

i went into this thinking that i would replicate traditional Japanese scriptures and woodblock prints. faded colours, cream coloured paper to mimic old scrolls, running ink, grunge, nature symbolism.

a customary pinterest board of some inspiration!

even though i was so dead-set on recreating the style of japanese paintings and calligraphy, i found it really hard to convey my ideas. i thought the colours looked too washed out, or the subject matter too difficult to work with.

so, despite all of this, i decided to rework my original idea and stick to a brighter background, and allow myself to step outside of the style. it took me a week of floundering back-and-forth between this decision before coming to it (grr,,,)

SCRAPPED DESIGNS & CONCEPTS !

hoo boy! the most frustrating (but also most interesting) section of this! i decided to keep all of my scrapped designs to show how one idea might change or stay the same throughout the process!

ONE:

tried to use an orange / taupe base for the design and it was too overpowering for a lot of colours. tried to remedy it by making the backgrounds bright n' vibrant, but it made designing layouts way too hard!

TWO:

i absolutely HATED the original design. i really thought i came up with something great with the petals and the border.... yeah it didn't really work out... it looked too crowded, and there were too many awkward spaces. i liked the petals though! in the second design, i tried using a square canvas again + tried again with the painting motif (for albedo <3) but... i thought the tenshukaku building NEEDED to be with the next line of dialogue.

sidenote: i finished this image first, but ended up remaking the entire thing after the entire thing was done. i was so... frustrated with this design too because i honestly had no idea how to fix it. i sat and stared at my laptop for hours trying to fix it because i really liked the font i used for the title...

THREE:

HATED THIS ONE TOO!!!! it looked way too dull!! what's the colour palette?? i tried to make it messy, but it looked.. too messy?? does that make any sense?? i had the hardest time reworking this one b/c i couldn't grasp what colours i wanted to use

FOUR:

first one looked too... clunky? basic? shrugs. i remade it to look like blackout poetry instead!

FIVE:

gr GR GRGGR THE BLUE! OH GOSH! the light blue didn't sit well with me at all! the liquid is supposed to be sake (which, FYI kitty, isn't blue but okay!). the little wave also looked weird too—i wanted venti to kinda surf on the wave but it wasn't meant to be :<

SIX:

nothing too drastic! i already had a ton of trouble designing the first one, so i just made it more vibrant!

SEVEN:

.... i. i really thought i had a good idea for the first design. it was supposed to be a cool pop-art design with a vibrant blue background, and scaramouche's silhouette in the back! but! it was way too crowded, and i couldn't fit the text anywhere :( i was kinda disappointed b/c i spent hours making that scaramouche silhouette and i couldn't slot it anywhere :,)

motifs !

venti (suikou) "green light"

to represent his name, green glow and lanterns were used

his section is the only section that has a black background. this, paired with the moon, emphasizes that this entire story begins in the dark of night. venti's confession is the light that exposes any hidden secrets hidden within the dark.

the darkness in this section also directly references, "he was drinking at the tavern the entire night."

pears represent abundance and sustenance. i thought it was fitting, since venti seemed to be having a blast at the tavern!

xinqiu (aoi no okina) "elder of sunflower"

sunflowers! to represent his name! the yellow was also a lovely contrast against the shades of blue!

the puppet strings around him indicate his role within the story: a liason that was coerced. there is a mastermind behind this story and it doesn't seem to be xinqiu...?

kaedehara kazuha (akahito) "scarlet man"

the little blue bird on his scarf is him! (my personal headcanon) is that his poetry is like music! it sings and comes to life. it's bright and lively, like a little bird! is this canon? technically... no. but i can dream.

the ribbons are used to symbolize his initial status as a poet. he was celebrated and his words were treated like gifts (neatly tied together with a bow).

however, the ribbons that once showed his status became the very chains that tied him up. glory is only given to those that deserve it.

the red flowers—higanbana—are also called "flowers of death". they symbolize akahito's death as a poet, and his exile from the five kasen.

and lastly (my favourite motif!) are the black feathers! they are meant to represent feathers from the fallen black swan—akahito. this motif comes from the movie black swan, where it is said that "a dancer dies twice—once when they stop dancing. and this first death is more painful." a part of akahito died the day he was accused of plagiarism.

(i cried making this and i cry thinking about akahito and how painful it must have felt during his exile)

kamisato ayaka (sumizome) "ink-dyed"

the stream directly reflects her actions as she begins to dip the plagiarized poems in water.

the cherry blossoms symbolize renewal and new life. by proving that akahito did not plagiarize, she breathes life back into his art

it is believed that butterflies also symbolize death and rebirth. she witnessed both the death and rebirth of akahito.

the peach, oftentimes associated with momotarou, is known to ward off evil. the fruit also symbolizes feminity! sumizome is as smart and strong as she is beautiful <3

the smudges and ripples also represent her name and her actions within this story.

scaramouche (kuronushi) "black lord"

the red ribbons / string seen in his section tie together the entire graphic! throughout the piece, you can see red ribbons (the puppet strings, the "torn out" graphic, akahito's exile)—the events of the story are all the result of kuronushi's actions! he is the one who frames akahito and changes his red ribbons to red rope. he's the puppetmaster who got away.

the black feathers come back in his section to highlight his participation in plucking off akahito's feathers. he clips the wings of (once) flighty birds until they are grounded and caged.

CONCLUDING THOUGHTS !

this piece is my little problem child. we had a lot (and i repeat: a lot) of issues along the way and i almost considered scrapping it entirely. i spent days grieving about the design and disliking many of the ideas i would come up with. but! i'm very happy with how everything turned out! whoo!

hopefully i was able to do this story justice, haha :> i really enjoyed playing around with different motifs and trying to mix the genshin art style and my own!

ps. please don't tell me that my scrapped designs are better than my final ones LOL i will burst into tears! thank you!

#koriyue.txt #*gfx process #*tut #wa wa wa WAAA IT'S HERE!!!! #cradles this to my chest <3 #my blood sweat and tears.... #RIP MY SCARAOUCHE SILHOUETTE PRESS F :((( #also sad that i couldn't stick in an albedo easter egg anywhere :((( i'm sorry calx i wuv you #me: i love kazuha! also me: and what if i make his about DEATH

[bespectacledbun]

⚠️ [EN SPOILERS] ⚠️ 

some thoughts regarding a certain part of luke’s main route. kind of a vent about the localization, but not really that deep. under the cut for spoilers. tw/cw for mentions of sexual assault.

so I was reading luke’s route during election to use tickets for lucky time and I got to chapters 13 and 14 of his route— the part where he explains his origins and how his parents met to a horrified mc. and it has a flashback to Sariel explaining Luke’s origins to him in a flashback:

and..... I kind of feel like it was. downplayed in a sense? I understand ikepri is an otome first and foremost, but it’s already delved into a whole host of admittedly very dark topics, including abuse, depression, suicide, PTSD, war, and slavery. so it’s not as if this is the first time they’ve covered something that would need a trigger warning. this is the exact same dialogue line in the JP version:

Sariel: “That night... the king assaulted and raped your mother like a beast”

the information is the same but the wording is much more explicit in comparison. in the en version.... it feels like they tried to sanitize it (not the right word) so that the game wouldn’t be too dark. which, like, given all the other awful shit that already happens in game and with the other suitors, is a weird move imo. I feel like the localizers shouldn't have shied away from translating the line directly.

I can kind of guess WHY the line was changed, because ikepri jp and ikepri en were marketed as two different games. ikepri jp from the get-go was supposed to be a mature romance meant for adults, with dark topics included. ikepri en, on the other hand, was a cute fairytale-esque love story with no mention of how dark the game could really be. but the downside of that is a lot of players were underprepared for all the triggering stuff that the game actually has (ive seen many, many, many comments and tags on my posts about how ikepri was much darker than people expected). 

so with the atmosphere that ikepri en set up for itself, I guess that could be one reason why they chose to use different wording for that specific dialogue. but to me what ends up happening is the en version (unintentionally) downplays the severity of what happened with the previous king and Luke’s mother. 

“he forced himself onto your mother” doesn’t carry the same weight and severity that “he raped your mother” holds, from my view. it doesn’t really convey the level of trauma that Luke’s mother endured for the rest of her life because of what happened to her. what happened to her was rape, and I feel it should have been called as such in the game, not by a euphemism

#ikepri #ikepri en spoilers #cw rape #tw rape #again reminder that I tag for my archive not for my posts to be found in the search #and nobody is forced to agree or disagree with my views #also this is not me bashing Luke or his character I think the character is fine #this one specific bit of translation just really bothered me #I feel like they could have avoided that word if they didnt want to trigger people #but still found a way to actually convert the severity of the king's actions #this word choice did not do any of that imo

[thezolblade]

Anon from the fic! Wow!!!!!!!!! That outline!!!!!! Do you want to share any more hints about those three branches?

Sure! (This is partly making up more details as I go along, which means making progress with the draft.) Below the cut for spoilers:

So I've got three routes following after Reckoning now - see also that last ask. After Jon attacks Tim and scares Martin into cooperating again:

Retaliation. Sasha and Tim burn down the Institute (with Leitner's help). Jon's hurt by the archive's destruction, but he survives, at the others' mercy.

Relocation. Martin talks Jon into asking Elias to transfer them both to one of the Institute's sister organizations, citing irreconcilable differences with the rest of the team. (They know at that point that they're also temples to Beholding, and hope they'll be granted this even if they can't quit.) Since this is roughly at the point in the timeline when Jonah wanted to put some distance between himself and Jon to avoid being compelled (iirc he mentioned that he'd have gone on a trip if he hadn't been arrested), he ends up sending them to open a second branch of the Magnus Institute in Edinburgh, close to its original site.

Respectable fears. Jon takes the Institute from Jonah, and carries on maintaining the Archives while running the whole organisation. He keeps Martin as his personal assistant, and gets more calculated in manipulating him without breaking him, fending off numb depression by asking him to research enemies that they can fight to save lives, and making the rules more structured in private. Meanwhile, he sends Tim to investigate the Unknowing, and tries to decide whether he'll be too dangerous to keep hold of long term. When Sasha's ready to give up on changing things, he offers her a consultancy role, so that she can stay on his payroll, but spend her time on projects at other organizations, and she takes that as the best deal she can get.

Hints about the other routes, hmm...

Reconciliation: The first night, when Jon realizes he may have fucked up beyond anything that Martin will put up with for long, his first reaction, instead of figuring out some brilliant way of handling that, is to retreat to his room for a cigarette. Martin waits on the sofa, wishing he hadn't admitted that he doesn't like being shouted at or shoved around, because now he's getting the silent treatment, and it's only a matter of time before he's kicked out... Until he hears Jon light a second cigarette, and realizes he ought to go talk to him, or he might just hide and chain smoke all night.

Subjugation: Here's a bit of dialogue from the first night. A lot of conversations go a slightly different direction in my drafts than in the initial notes, and sometimes unused lines come up again later, so this level of detail is the most subject to change, but it might be an interesting read anyway:

Martin could feel himself blushing hard enough that the tips of his ears were burning. "If I'd ever imagined that we had a chance, I wouldn't have wanted our first time to go this way. It's late, and we were both tired and upset going into this, a-and I'm glad I've cheered you up, but I guess it doesn't feel like we're going about things the right way to make it last, or make it special."

"What would you like to do, to make it special?" Jon's tone was light and faintly mocking.

Martin took a second to collect his thoughts, treating it as a serious question. It wasn't as if he stood to lose anything by making a few suggestions.

"Why don't we get ourselves hot drinks, and cuddle on the sofa until we're ready to fall asleep? Then maybe tomorrow, we could talk about our likes and dislikes. You know, books, music, TV, food, all that sort of thing, a-as well as sex. How does that sound?" Martin tried to smile as he waited for an answer. The silence stretched on, and he couldn't help but get psyched out. "Uh, shall I go make us some tea?"

"Not yet."

"Oh?"

"Take off your clothes. I haven't even seen you yet."

Martin hesitated, but Jon looked quite intent on doing this now.

"Oh, okay." Martin clenched his fingers in his t-shirt, then glanced at the bags he'd left next to the bed. "If we're going to be up for a while longer, why don't I grab my phone and put some music on? That could be, ah, relaxing."

"I don't need mood music. I need to know what you're capable of."

"...Oh." Martin heard his own voice go quiet, and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to pull himself together. Jon was making it fairly clear that he didn't care about setting him at ease, and he still wasn't in the mood to take no for an answer. Hadn't he better play along before he lashed out again?

#heart of the disaster #tma thoughts #rozzlynn's fanfic

[hazelnut-u-out]

Hello mutual! For the writing thing: 🥺, ✨, 🎶,  👀 and/or 🤲, 🧠 for Rick, and if there’s anything you particularly want to answer that you haven’t been asked then that too if you want to?

thank you for sending in an ask!! <33

i just saw your reply to mine, hehe. answers under the cut!

🥺Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

hmmm... this one is kind of difficult to answer because, yes, but it's difficult to pick just one lol. if i had to pick one that makes me the most emotional, it'd probably be a tossup between young rick being any sort of paternal/doting to baby beth or any kind of moment where morty shows how sweet and pure his intentions are when everyone he puts himself on the line for is so undeserving.

also, rick crying or morty getting angry enough to just tear into someone. it's kind of their respective, "something is really wrong here."

✨Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it.

thank you, hehe. i'm my own worst critic, but i feel like i can make anything angsty and painful if you want me to. i also think i'm pretty good at painting visual details with words??

🎶Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

i have a hard time listening to music while i read or write because i get overstimulated SUPER easily lol. i do base a lot of my fics off of songs, though!

one i keep coming back to for rick is "storms" by fleetwood mac:

"did i ever really care that much? is there anything left to say?

every hour of fear i spend, my body tries to cry

living through each empty night

a deadly calm inside

i haven't felt this way i feel since many a year ago"

one that always makes me think of morty is "ghost on" by angel olsen:

"when should i believe the things you say?

you change your mind from day to day

and i don't know if you can take such a good thing coming to you

and i don't know if you can love someone stronger than you're used to"

i also have plenty i revisit for birdrick stuff.

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

i'm working on a couple of multi-chapter concepts atm! i've been rereading the original "the adventures and memoirs of sherlock holmes" rn to work on my rick and morty x holmes and watson au!

🤲 Would you please share a snippet of a wip?

some morty dialogue from an upcoming angst fic between the boy and his mad scientist grandpa:

"What, Rick? Woul- Would that make for a better story? W-Would it make me a more developed character? Or maybe a different answer would make you feel better! I-I'm so sorry! D-Did you have a different character arc in mind? One that would make you feel better about the character you've wr-written me to be? Would it be easier for you to forgive me if there was a-a-a reason that I did what I did? Would it tie up loose ends if -(redacted for spoilers)-? Give you closure? W-Well... 'tough luck, buddy.'"

also, just for you, a birdrick snippet from a revenge-era space cowboy multi-chapter wip:

The young man was unfurled below his companion like a blanket beneath the stars, and they studied one another like a loner’s wide eyes would peruse the cosmos sprawled out above them- Rick's quivering fingers and lips taking note of constellations divinely created for nothing more than his sinful touch along the way.

🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them. (Rick)

i have so many silly headcanons about rick. my favorite is probably that he doesn't let morty get adult meals when they go through drive thru's. he has to get the kid's meal, but rick demands he give him the toy.

#my fics #asks

[attheexactlyrighttimeandplace]

Oops, two "not as great as usual" episodes in a row to end this first season, it's really sad for me who was hoping so much that i could rate the whole season 10/10.

I know 6 ouf of 8 episodes that are worth a 10 is a high score, it's just that i wanted to love them all the same way. Also i don't like to write less passionate reviews for this show that became so clearly a favourite of mine.

It's a less enthusiastic review because in my view the plot and the characters broke once more the rules of continuity and consistency that have guided the series until episode 6.

To be clear, episode 8 has a logic, the one started in episode 6. The problem is the three episodes work well together, but not well with the rest of the series in my view. Based in this observation, the theory that started to take form in my mind since episode 6 is that the show has been rewritten in some parts.

By that, i mean, based on various clues (dialogues + interviews of the cast and producers) that the entirety of the series was written before they started filming. But after filming 2 episodes, the production had to stop because of the Covid. During this time, the showrunners looked at what had been filmed and made the terrible (in my view) decision to change completely some characters arcs, which had ripple effects on the rest of the show. They couldn't rewrite themselves all the episodes or ask the original writers to do it (it would have been too much work to redo), so they fixed here and there the most glaring inconsistencies their changes have created, until episode 6 where the eruption of Mt Doom, changed completely the balance of of the series. It opened a window seized by the showrunners to reconfigure the plotlines and the relationships, breaking some relations and replacing them forcibly by new ones.

And the conclusion for me after episode 8 is that the new characters development and the new plots (Halbrand as Sauron, Elendil's reduced arc, Arondir's absence of arc after episode 6) are nowhere as powerful and exciting that the initial plan, as i imagine it.

But conveniently, this dichotomy works well to build this review. Thus let's go for two parts:

a review of episode 8 cut in multiple parts because i have lot of feelings and thoughts to explore and with which to make peace,

a theory on what i think the final could have been if the series didn't changed its direction during episode 6, had stayed on the same path that was has been suggested since episode 1 (it's another post that will come soon.

On episode 8 (Part 1)

I feel that rating this episode as high as i rated the rest of the season until episode 6 wouldn't be fair, though it was overall solid and enjoyable, even brilliant in some parts, because its 3 sub-plots did not benefit of the same quality of writing, and the gap between them ranges from excellent to disappointing (in my opinion).

What created the general impression of an episode, despite all, compelling to watch is the attention given to the visuals.

The director Wayne Che Yip, the director of photography, the two editors, the special effects and the vfx coordinators did an outstanding job of filling every image with impressive amount of details, wonder and symbolism (the phantasmagoric/dreamlike presence of water in the scenes where Sauron tried to influence Galadriel's mind, the disturbing use of the pattern of the eye and its shape, and the endless eyes contacts to narrate Sauron's obsession for control, the spooky and yet strangely poetic destruction of the Mystics).

So much that they managed to compensate partially a script that was lacking tension, suffered of too many omissions specifically in the subplots taking place in Nùmenor (and its ships) and Eregion.

Gandalf Th Istar, the Harfoots and the Mystics

EDIT: i had to cross out a lot of parts of my review because after publishing this post i read an interview of the main writer of the episode Gennifer Hutchinson, in which she explained that the quote about following his nose doesn't mean that the wizard is Gandalf, that it's an old saying that many people use.

I presume it's a rights issue that stops the producers from including Gandalf, but i still think it's a very low trick. Hutchison knew that everyone would be expecting Gandalf with this line made famous by the films, when the show will return (2 years of wait!), but not only it's not him, she also still kept us in the dark about the wizard's identity after a complete season spent questioning his intentions, his name and his powers! She's taking us for fools and i really don't like it.

It's the best part of the episode without surprise: it's the only sub-plot that in my theory hasn't been at all affected by the changes made by the probable rewriting of the season. From episode 1 to episode 8, it was a model of intelligent writing: constant in quality and well balanced between the twists/mysteries and the characters development.

In other circumstances i would say that Daniel Weyman stole the show and ran away with it since basically the first episode, but it's not really what he did. It a was collective work, in which he made acting choices that could have totally been Ian McKellen's choices, followed his steps in a way that confirmed he was the perfect actor to play "young" Gandalf. Instead of outshining the Harfoots cast with his charisma, his ambiguity and subtle expressions of emotions, he shared the stage with them. Which lead them to become together the most fun, compelling and emotionally rewarding team of the show, a teamwork that goes hand to hand with the plot and its description of the superb victory of Gandalf The Istar and the Harfoots on the Mystics.

For once the script helped them a lot: it was a perfect balance between the intensity of the threat represented by the Mystics and the courageous defense of the Harfoots, between the small roles given to each Harfoot in the plan to rescue Gandalf The Istar and the final spectacular conclusion of the fight, when the magician took the matter in his own hands. I loved that it was the death threat hanging over his loyal friends that fully reactivated his powers. It's completely in line with his personality.

The CGI of the progressive destruction of The Mystics were so well done, so reminiscent of the aesthetic of the LOTR films! It was unique like the image of the giant moth exploding when the Dweller died, and at the same time a direct reference to the visuals of the most spectral villains of the films: from the Nazgûls to the Barrow Wights.

I'm amazed at the fact that the Harfoots literally sent away Nori because she kept dreaming of adventures and wanting to be special, bringing the attention of strangers that caused all sort of troubles for them, and yet it was the right way to start her adventures with Gandalf The Istar. It didn't diminish either my love for all the scenes of the Brandyfoot family, Poppy and all their community saying goodbye to Nori. I enjoyed them knowing than when she will return, most of them might be dead.

At least, it's logically what should happen : there's no reason for Nori's story to be more happy than anyone else in a world where evil has raised to dominate all forms of life. Gandalf's words full of promises on having an adventure are an evidence by themselves, it didn't end that good for Bilbo - who was just lucky that Gollum was caught and tortured in his place, and who still got infected by the evil of the One ring - and Frodo who dreamt all his life to follow his uncle's path but had no real choice in leaving his home and whose "adventure" turned into a nightmare of madness and death. They were saved only because of the gift granted by the Elves whom offered them a new life in Valinor.

But the series seems to follow the steps of the films while avoiding to repeat the same twists, so maybe she'll come back unscarred and thrilled by her time with Gandalf the Istar (actually it would also explain why he took Bilbo on a adventure with him, it worked well the first time for Nori and him, making him confident that Hobbits can survive everything). Or maybe she will come back scarred and everyone else especially Poppy and Marigold would have been right from the start (because this magician is really not Gandalf and might fail in his mission).

My regrets:

That The Mystics have been killed! They were such good villains that i would have kept them alive, send them to Sauron precisely at the end of the episode when he returned to Mordor, so that they swear allegiance to the new dark king. In the next season, i would have given them the opportunity to fight and defeat Adar and his children/orcs, in order to impose their master's domination on his new kingdom. With an extension of their powers and some additional development of their backstories, they could certainly have brought a lot of fun to season 2 before the arrival of the Nazgûls….

The death of Sadoc Burrows was an absurd, infuriating and disappointing twist. Not only they killed a poc character, but it was absolutely not necessary: why him more than Largo (not that i want to lose him, it's just an example) ? We don't know. it looked like an adult of the group had to go and so they picked him. His death wasn't logical or earned (unlike Ontamo's death) - he was stabbed but it could have been easily written to be a superficial wound - nor emotional: the way he just sit on a rock and watched the sun rising while pretending that dying wasn't so hard, was stupid (it's not like he was dying of old age, he was wounded in a violent fight!); and the others Harfoots were allowed one minute of tears and then moved on (reducing them at some quirky funny little pets not the full formed persons they are). Maybe the writers thought the characters should keep all the intense emotions for Nori's departure from her family and the group? I wish there was somewhere an interview of the actor to explain what happened….

This sub-plot had a lot of thrilling fighting scenes and heartbreaking separations, but didn't resolve the questions related to Gandalf the Istar. We still don't know why he lost his memory, or how the Valar who sent him, knew that evil was going to rise again, while Sauron himself was hiding his identity and had no plan to return immediately (Galadriel and Adar forced his hand). How the Mystics knew that an istar was coming as the same time as their master Sauron? Why did they think that he was made prisoner and by who? Only the location represented by the map has started to reveal itself. Let's hope season 2 does a better job at advancing this plot.

Part 2 on Nùmenor (ships and island) is next.

#the rings of power #episode 8: alloyed #gandalf #elanor nori brandyfoot #sadoc burrows #the mystics #daniel weyman #my trop reviews

[matoitech]

i watched the 2009 astro boy movie for the first time since i was a kid yesterday and i didn’t have like high expectations going in but i ended up being genuinely impressed it was pretty good. i stopped paying attention for the last like 20 minutes but the dialogue for the parts i did see was p solid, they had a lot of good quips, it felt like they actually took the writing pretty seriously and it showed. i rly liked this movie as a kid i thought it was rly sad and related 2 astro a lot and i Got Why rewatching it like the dehumanization of this robot kid oof. the visuals arent even bad for a 2009 cg movie, the char design can look a little funky trying to translate tezukas style into like cg models but it was overall pretty good (the writing was better than some of the visual direction like some cuts were weird.. the scene where toby died felt kind of weird w the angles they chose to try and hide him and then u found out he just fucking evaporated i guess so it was like ok why did u even bother trying to angle away from where we would all assume his body is). i think they also tried to like americanize the story and characters more? but im unsure bcuz this is the only astro boy related media ive actually seen i think (ive seen other tezuka stuff but not this one) anyway if they did that would suck but its not too surprising for its time period unfortunately. i think itwas made in the us but i mean w like character/place names and stuff (astro and the doc still had their japanese surname tho; i think some of the changes mightve been to just keep in line w prior localizations of the original manga/animes? im unsure). anyway overall pretty solid and enjoyable i liked it

#also i realized a LOT of jokes and stuff i used to repeat w my sister originated From this movie #but neither of us remembered bcuz we hadnt seen it since we were kids lol #i mustve owned it on dvd or something bcuz i do remember like more of the story than i think i wouldve had i just seen it in the theater