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#tros roast
tros-for-dinner · 9 months
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someone left a comment on my Reylo post-Last-Jedi fic (*blows them a kiss, wherever they are*), talking about how tragic it is to read my good ending after watching TROS, and yeah. After TROS, I re-read my ending dozens of times in the months afterwards. Those last ten chapters absolutely got me through my mourning period.
And then, in their comment on my fic, they briefly touched on the most common anti-TROS talking points and - it has been three years (?!) since TROS and everything all came rushing back. TROS could have been a good movie! if the people making the movie had performed a bone marrow transplant about halfway through the process. Yes, 'Palpatine returned' is dumb as shit. Yes, space horses are silly. But I could've enjoyed those things if the absolute foundation of the movie had been good. It all came rushing back: all the solutions I'd come up with to 1. make the movie comprehensible 2. transform the narrative into something I would've enjoyed, while keeping as much the same as possible
Anyway now I'm itching to pick my tros-fix-it back up
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thecyndimistuff · 2 years
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remember that one interview of john boyega and oscar isaac roasting the “THEY FLY NOW” dialogue during the tros press tour and john wheezes under his breath “they’ve been using jetpacks since the clone wars”
king
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redbelles · 1 year
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13, 21, and 33 for the fanfic writer asks!
13. who is your least favorite character to write for? why?
i tend not to write much fic about characters i don't enjoy writing, but on the occasions that i've had to bring in mike wheeler, malyen orestev, and poe dameron, i have not had fun*!
mike because he's stupid and boring, mal because i straight up can't stand that asshole, and poe because tros absolutely ruined his character for me
*unless it's of the spite-based variety. am i talking about mal? i'm talking about mal.
21. tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? what is it about them that you admire?
@lymricks has an incredible knack for all the things i look for in a story— prose, pacing, emotion, sense of place, etc. i reread dried up, half full and in waves on the regular, because holy shit!!!! they're so good it makes me ache!!!
@littlelindentree peels characters apart like onions and then slow roasts them until they're caramelized and perfect and you spend the rest of your time in fandom searching in vain for that same delicious thoroughness and perhaps this metaphor is falling apart but i have loved her cooking since way back when in fnl fandom on lj and i will never ever be over it
big_pink taught me more about non-linear narratives and complex plot payoff than several theory and craft books in college
@pheebebuffy murders me on the regular with the way she tackles emotions in general and catharsis in particular!!! she pretty much single-handedly dragged me back into gilmore girls fandom in the year of our lord 2022!!! i am so feral for her every iteration of jess mariano i low key high key wanna die about it!!!!
33. what’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?
i've gotten some really incredible feedback on both my fic and my original writing, but. this one. this one takes the cake:
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send me some fic writer asks!
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aaronburrdaily · 10 months
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May 19, 1809
We were up at 1 last night gathering and packing for removal this morning. Rose at 6 and to work at packing. Sent for Mr. Gahn, the apothek,¹ the son of the member from Falun, to interpret and assist in settling. At 9 he came. Our host, determined to make the most of us, charged 12 rix dollars per week for the two rooms which he would gladly have let for 5; 12 sch.² per day for the servants’ attendance. We finally settled at 21 rix dollars, 10.24 each. We had breakfast and tea with them. Paid 1 rix dollar to the boy. Our new quarters, two handsomely furnished and pleasant rooms, with the use of a third in common with one other person, at 7 rix dollars per week. The rooms are worth double those we left, yet the price is double what it would be if the Diet³ were off. No person in our new quarters speaks a word of French or English; hence much vexation. Unpacked and settled ourselves. At 1/2 p. 2 to dine with Baron Munck. Y: The Baron et ux. and a little niece (12), Professor Arnt, and Dr. Domcier, the German physician to the Duke of Sussex, who is here a missionary for benevolent purposes from the Philanthropic Society, invited, but did not come. The sideboard and brandy before dinner. At dinner, eggs, and slices of salt salmon; roast beef; fish, then soup, veal, and spinach; wild fowl. At table about two hours, then all rose together. Our bows, &c. Adjourned to the saloon. Y: coffee. At 1/2 p. 5 came off with Professor Arnt. On our way he took me to the German doctor's (Sussex) to introduce me; out; left card. Arnt came home with me and sat a while. At 6 Mr. Gahn (nev.⁴) came to take us to the ball. Hosack, not being able to make his toilet, was left. On our way met Mr. ——— of the City College, who went with us. Took boat (to save about five hundred going by the bridge); all these boats rowed by women. Paid 1/2 sch. At the ball about sixty ladies, (not so splendid as that at the Exchange); Countess of ———  and her niece; Baron Wrangle; Baron Armfelt, who introduced me to his daughter, the Baroness of ——— , a very fine woman; a physiognomy of great intelligence; tres belle. La Baroness de B. cru la plus belle. Pas par moi.⁵ M’lle Sergei fl. nat. du statuaire.⁶ Left the ball at 10; mal. a. t. ayant tro. bu.⁷ Hosack came in at 9; left him there. Home at 1/2 p. 10. Rhea.⁸ Couche at 11 on the canopie⁹; can’t endure the down bed.
1  This word means in Swedish apothecary's shop, not the apothecary himself, which should be apotekare. 2  Evidently Burr's abbreviation for the Swedish shilling, a copper coin now worth about a cent in American money. 3  The national parliament, then in session. 4  For neveu. Nephew. 5  Believed to be the most beautiful. Not by me. 6  Miss Sergei, natural daughter [fille naturelle] of the statuary. 7  For mal à la tête, ayant trop bu. Headache from having drunk too much. 8  Probably meant for Latin of rhubarb. See Glossary. 9  For canapé. Sofa.
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renee-mariposa · 4 years
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It occurred to me yesterday while I was perusing the TROS salt tag that in TROS, the filmmakers inadvertently made Kylo and Rey very much alike. This similarity is more subtle (less hamfisted!) through TFA and TLJ but it’s undeniably there.
They’re both angry. They’re both impulsive. They’re both Down To Fight. They both feel the dark side strongly. (I could go on but I haven’t seen TROS in two months, the details are fuzzy.)
And, like, they’re a Dyad In The Force or whatever - so it makes sense to me that they’re very similar in all these important ways. But then I realized the implications of this idea: I asked myself, “With Rey’s behavior in TROS, why do the protagonists welcome Rey when they rejected Ben?” In a more meta view: why did the writers of TROS punish Ben and ‘reward’ Rey when a lot of their behaviors are very similar?
Think about it: Rey in TROS does a lot of the things Kylo does in TFA or TLJ (see above) but Rey wholeheartedly embraces the Skywalker/Organa/Solo legacy - admiring Luke and Leia, wanting to be them, striving to ‘earn’ their legacy. Ben distanced himself from his family, killed the emissary Leia sends to bring him back. He opposed Luke. “Let the past die,” he insisted to Rey. He is punished by being killed off unceremoniously and being completely forgotten by every character in the movie. Rey’s narrative ‘reward’ is that she gets to take on a name that holds prestige and power in the minds of the writers and receives the metaphorical blessing of her guardians (Leia and Luke as benevolent Force ghosts).
And what did Ben do wrong? “He killed a lot of people!” Well, Poe kills a lot of people and he’s shown to be a triumphant hero in the end, so that’s not it. “He’s angry!” So is Rey.
I realized that Ben's chief sin in the eyes of the writers is that he rejected the legacy of his family.
So, in the end, TROS is a movie that preaches: if you dare to reject anything your parents teach you, if you dare to distance yourself from any tradition based on harmful thinking, you will be rejected and forgotten and that’s the happy ending.
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80swonderqueen · 4 years
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chekovs-turbolaser · 4 years
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If you want:
a deeper dive into the mind of traitor!Hux
a TRoS-era plot that complies with prior movies
a version of Palpatine with a precise, rational villainous plot and a clear way of surviving Episode 6
a fresh take on Star Wars lineages
broken Force bonds that are treated as seriously traumatic
some World Between Worlds action or maybe a stint on Mortis
angst and misery and heroic sacrifices that lead to...
all your faves ending up safe and happy and alive, surrounded by family and love*
*Snoke and the moldy blue raisin need not apply.
Consider reading tied on a string (indeed, general hux)! This is a Kylux longfic centered on a time-traveling Hux and his (ex-)soulmate Kylo. I wrote it before TRoS with the intention of inventing a story so twisted and angsty and broken that canon would never dare come close. It now works as a Kylux fix-it for TRoS. What times we live in.
P.S. Armitage Hux shoots Pryde in the chest!
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onlymollygibson · 4 years
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Trying to Appease Every Single Fan  Backfired Spectacularly: An Analysis of The Rise of Skywalker
Up until The Rise of Skywalker, every Star Wars movie made has added new levels of depth, complexity and fun to the Star Wars canon and enhanced the viewing of previous movies.  The Rise of Skywalker did the opposite, by disrespecting or invalidating key themes and plot elements from previous movies.  (Spoilers below the cut)
Bringing Palpatine Back:
Not only is this a complete invalidation of Vader’s sacrifice in RotJ, but it completely undoes the interesting set-up at the end of TLJ:
What does Kylo Ren (a Darth Vader analog) do after killing his master and not turning to the light?
Can he hold onto power or does someone like Hux usurp him?
Both the Resistance and the First Order have been weakened considerably by the end of TLJ.  How does this play out in the complicated field of intergalactic politics?
These questions will never be answered because Abrams apparently didn’t know what to do without a Big Bad.
Since a redemption arc for Kylo Ren was obviously in the plans, it makes absolutely no sense to have him kill his evil master in TLJ and then go back and have to face his *real* evil master in TRoS.  
If you want to make a satisfying redemption arc in just three movies, you can’t afford to re-tread the same ground twice.  The next step after killing Snoke should have been Kylo Ren ruling as Supreme Leader, without Snoke’s voice in his head, and still feeling empty.  Think Zuko in Season 3 of AtLA, when he goes back to the Fire Nation a hero.  He had everything he thought he wanted, but he realized his victory was hollow and he was on the wrong side all along.  Now that’s a satisfying redemption arc. 
Rey Palpatine
Not only did Rian Johnson have Kylo Ren explicitly state Rey has no place in this story, but she had a freaking force vision telling her basically the same thing. The force vision in TLJ (and arguably a key theme of the movie as well) is rendered meaningless by the Rey Palpatine reveal in TRoS.
Also, we’ve done the whole ‘protagonist finds out they’re descended from the villain’ before, with the whole Luke - Vader reveal.  
You mean to tell me the grandson of Darth Vader died to save the granddaughter of Palpatine?  Seriously?
Kylo Ren dies
The following people died in an attempt to return Ben Solo to the light.
Han Solo
Luke Skywalker
Leia Organa
They succeeded, but only for ten minutes, because the Last Skywalker rose (or climbed out of a hole or whatever - seriously THAT was the title of the movie) and then died two minutes later.
Not to mention they’re telling the same story twice.  Again!  And just like with the Rey Palpatine nonsense, they told it better the first time. Darth Vader - manipulated from childhood by a creepy evil dude.  Dies.  His grandson - manipulated from childhood by a creepy evil dude.  Dies.  Recycling old plots is not good storytelling.
Furthermore, the story of Darth Vader becomes much more tragic if his death to save the next generation didn’t really save them, since his grandson became obsessed with his legacy, repeated his mistakes and ended the same way Vader did -with death ten minutes after he turned back to the light.  Only KR didn’t even have another generation to save. 
Lando Calrissian rallies the troops
Remember how emotional it was when no one was around to help Leia in TLJ?  It turns out all she needed last time was Lando Calrissian and a space boom box or whatever he did to get that many people to show up in no time at all.  I mean, I know it was because he went to the Core Worlds, but thematically, you’ve got Lando Calrissian succeeding where Princess Leia failed and it doesn’t sit right with me.
Force Healing
Remember Anakin Skywalker, who turned to the Dark Side to save Padme and stayed on the Dark Side for like thirty years afterwards?  Well he’s in Force heaven watching the scene where Rey heals Kylo Ren with absolute disgust.  “Seriously?  It was that easy?  That would have been nice to know before I threw Mace Windu off a building.”
A particularly egregious way in which TRoS disrespected previous movies was the method in which this movie raised the stakes. 
Remember how absolutely terrified the Rebels were of the Death Star in Rogue One.  Remember that achingly beautiful bittersweet ending?  Well now forty-ish years later, they’re still fighting that same fight, to the point that it’s become a joke.  The bad guys make a planet killer.  The good guys blow it up.  How have we had five out of eleven movies with this same plot?  Every time you tell the same story AGAIN, it cheapens the other times the story has been told. It’s like inflation.
Seriously?  The final battle of the nine-movie saga involves fighting like five hundred Star Destroyers that came out of nowhere with giant Death Star canons strapped on the bottom?
I mean yes, the idea is horrifying, but imagine the directors of Nightmare on Elm Street saying, “Freddie Krueger was terrifying and people loved the movie.  For the sequel, let's have a hundred Freddie Kruegers running around.”  It works with snakes and spiders, but not super creepy people or powerful weapons. 
This is especially true because the Sith Fleet was basically pulled out of thin air, which makes the whole thing feel like Diabolus ex Machina.
It’s made doubly ridiculous because they’re not only absurdly powerful, they’re also easy to destroy.  I mean, seriously, Tie Fighters are harder to blow up than those things.  A single strafing run from a Y-wing and the whole dang Star Destroyer is toast.  This means you don’t really need any battle tactics beyond ‘shoot the giant gun,’ which makes for a really boring action sequence.  Star Wars is famous for its dogfights in space.  I mean, yeah, the tactics are not actually plausible because zero gravity changes warfare in ways they don’t address, but it’s fine because of the Rule of Cool.  
As for the characters and relationships, it’s kind of a trainwreck and nobody is really happy.
Tons of fans are unhappy because Kylo Ren and Rey kissed
Many were opposed to the idea of a villain turning good because he was in love with the hero and that’s exactly what happened in this movie
Others were unhappy because they saw KR as an unredeemable monster and yet he had a (small, not very well executed) redemption arc.  
He never suffered for his past actions or even really talked about them, yet he and the protagonist are in love, so it’s fine.
The fans who wanted a Kylo Ren/Rey relationship were unhappy because of how the relationship played out
The redemption arc wasn’t all that great.  
The whole Rey Palpatine thing means that KR lied to Rey when he asked her to join him in TLJ.  That line was cringey enough when it was true, and now that it's a lie, it’s twice as bad.
They’re a diad in the Force and now one of them is dead?  How is that a happy ending?
A major theme of the sequels was Rey finding belonging and someone who understand her.  KR was sold as a dual protagonist, someone who understands her.  They were on the same side for ten minutes and then he died and Rey doesn’t cry, instead she goes sand sledding and takes the Skywalker name.  Seriously, how is this a ‘satisfying’ ending?
And a few minor things
Why does Rose only get like four lines?  
General Hux had like two minutes of screen time.  For a fan-favorite villain, his ending was disappointing.  He really owned his two minutes, though.  But think, without the Palpatine nonsense, there could have been more time to examine the discord in the ranks of the First Order higher-ups, with some focus on the lack of respect the original Imperials have for the new generation of First Order commanders.  When you raise the stakes with a larger-than-life villain (especially one who was supposed to have died), you run the risk of losing the far more interesting stories revolving around villains who are far more human, both in their powers and in their emotions and desires. 
Did anyone have character growth in this movie?  Because to me it seemed like they were so busy with shots of CGI copy-pasted Star Destroyers in a row, that they didn’t leave time for personal growth or emotional payoff.
Early reviews said The Rise of Skywalker checked all the boxes for a Star Wars movie, but forgot about the heart.  Now that I finally dragged myself to the theater to see for myself, I can’t help but agree. 
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deadlyniightshaade · 4 years
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The rise of skywalker REALLY tried to convince me that Poe and Rey would be at all interested in a member of the opposite sex ????!!!! Mind blowing !
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desertlorn · 4 years
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any male character over 40: exists 
rey: are u my father 🥺 
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cierra you're BACK i missed our daily clowning
Laurene!! It’s been so long!! My first semester of college got kinda overwhelming so I’m sorry I dropped off the face of the earth but I missed you too, along with your lovely hot takes!
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tros-for-dinner · 2 years
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I know I made this account to mercilessly roast TROS but when I watch bad movies, I’m honestly more interested in sifting through the movie: what ideas worked? Why didn’t I like the movie? Is it the ideology of the movie I didn’t like, or was it the execution? Would the movie had been more enjoyable with a different director? I can forgive a movie for being silly: I love making good-natures fun of movies. I can forgive wooden performances if I can imagine hidden depths of emotion in the character.
So when I watch movies i didn’t enjoy, I love sitting back and saying, what could be fixed about that? Don’t just make fun of it, give me some food for thought
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ladygadfly · 5 years
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TROS Rey Parentage Theory
What if Rey is the granddaughter/clone of Palpatine? Rey is a good person by nature, but there’s been hints of a more dark side nature showing through. Could that be a sign she’s got some connection to a dark side force user?
If she’s a clone her parents could literally be nobody. It could also be why the mirror cave showed her endless versions of herself. If she’s his granddaughter it would explain why her parents were never important, since it’s never indicated that Palpatine had any family, or at east none that he cared about. 
I do genuinely think that Ben was telling Rey the truth about what he saw of her parents. It’s important to note that although Ben says “you come from nothing”, Rey is the one who says “they were nobody” first. She knows in her heart that her parents were trash who abandoned her and are never coming back, has always known, but made herself believe that they were going to come back for her to stop herself from going mad with loneliness. I think that was one of the most emotionally powerful moments in the sequel trilogy so far, personally, and for Ep IX to walk that back with a trite “lol, just kidding she’s actually a Solo/Skywalker” would be a terrible idea. 
This reveal would satisfy the fans that believe Rey needs to have some kind of relevant lineage in order to be so powerful, without making her a Skywalker by birth or by cloning her from Luke’s severed hand - which either way would make the Reylo hints so far very incestuous and uncomfortable, we don’t need any more accidental incest in the franchise please. Although with the reveal in the comics that Palpatine manipulated the force to get Shmi Skywalker pregnant with Anakin it is still sort or incesty...in a really confusing fake science kind of way...
Palpatine was in the prequel trilogy and original trilogy, but so far basically hasn’t been even mentioned in the sequel trilogy at all. So for him to be making an appearance in the final film of the Skywalker saga makes sense, but I can’t help but think there’s more to it that just some flashbacks of “yeah, this guy basically created Darth Vader”. I feel like there needs to be another twist to it. There’s a big theme of family and inheritance within the entire saga, and particularly the sequel trilogy. Just as Ben inherited his grandfather’s legacy, maybe Rey will inherit hers. 
It also makes narrative sense to me because Palpatine was the one who led Anakin to the dark side, so for his descendant to be the one who brings Ben back to the light has a nice full-circle kind of feel to it. Rey can be the one to break the cycle of death and destruction that Palpatine started. 
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zdbztumble · 2 years
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DAY 7: Double-Dating
Happy Pokeshipping Day!
We closed things out with one of @lightningenergy’s favorite inventions for the group fic verse: Serena and Ritchie as a couple. (That’s the big need-to-know for this fic, plus everything mentioned for Day 4; Serena’s one of the exceptions to the “Kalos = super-French” rule. She puts more effort into “common tongue.”).
***
"Um - that is a lovely brooch, Misty..." Serena shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She reached over to stroke Sparky's tuft for comfort. No matter how often they ran into one another, Misty always made her feel a little nervous. It wasn't something Serena was proud of, but she couldn't help it. Anyone that assertive made her feel that way.
And when that anyone was drumming impatiently on the table, scowling at the restaurant door her husband was meant to come through fifteen minutes ago... She's a friend, Serena reminded herself. She's a friend, she's a friend, she's a friend...
Misty sighed and finally turned to the other woman. "Thank you, Serena. And... I'm sorry for being like this." 
 Ritchie, sitting on Serena's other side, said, "Maybe he got lost?" There was too much optimism in his voice for such a statement. When Misty flinched, he moved his foot out of reach from hers. 
 "We've been to this place before," she answered. "He probably got caught up in a battle again and will show up with dirty clothes again..."
"Ah, well..." Ritchie tugged on his collar. He had taken great care with his suit; it was their first double-date with Ash and Misty as a married couple, and their first formal date while visiting the Orange Islands, but Serena knew it wasn't a comfortable look for him. "I'm sure he'll be here soon -" 
"How are you two?" Misty said abruptly, in a rather high, strained-friendly voice.
("They've finally gotten into that 'hot and heavy' phase,") gagged Sparky from Serena's lap. ("Now I get what Pikachu was talking about.") 
 "What he means is," clarified Ritchie, clamping his hand over his Pokemon's mouth. "Things have been going great. I got to meet Grace (who was glad I wasn't Ash), and we're looking to take a trip next year to--" 
 His words were cut short by the maître-d's raised voice and hurried footsteps. Ash gave a weak grin as he hurried over to the table, Pikachu atop his shoulder. Misty didn't look up as she said, "You're late."
"He's clean," Serena offered. A flicker of Misty's eyes made her immediately regret it. 
"Sorry, Mist," Ash collapsed more than he sat down. Pikachu rolled down from his shoulder into the soup. "It was Team Apple again." 
"Team Apple?" Serena and Ritchie asked together. 
"Yeah, a gang of poachers," Ash explained through gasps. "They showed up - whoo! - a few weeks ago - hey, can we get some water? - hunting for all the Orangian forms of Pokemon - anyone gonna eat the bread?"
"So you went against them knowing you'd be late?" Misty said, still not meeting her husband's gaze. "Couldn't leave it to your Elites?" 
 "It happened right when I was there." Ash rebuked through a mouthful of breadsticks. "I wasn't gonna just up and leave--" 
 "We've had this planned for two. Months."
"Oh, mro mroo rould rave - gulp! - you would've let them make off with two whole containers of Pokeballs?" 
"Well, I would've let you know something was wrong!" 
"There wasn't time, Misty!" 
"Well, your bodyguards could've handled it!" 
"I gave them the week off so it'd be just you 'n me for this trip, you know that!" 
"Well, they seem the same as always," Ritchie whispered to Serena.
Serena was inwardly thankful for having given up on Ash as she watched him argue with Misty. Pikachu, having shaken himself dry, was frowning at his companions. 
 "What do you think we should order?" Ritchie said loudly as he picked up his menu. His question was lost amongst the continued back-and-forth occurring across the table.
Serena decided to follow Ritchie's lead in ignoring the argument. "I think the roasted pineapple sounds interesting, don't you, Ritchie?" 
"Yeah, that does look good -" 
" - every time you get in trouble! What's so hard about telling your wife that you need help -" 
"And maybe some chilled bananas with it?" said Serena, a little louder. 
"That could work." Ritchie was almost shouting, but it didn't do any good. 
" - of the Elite Four now, you could at least try to be sympathetic when I get caught up in work!" 
"I do have sympathy, and I'm glad you saved those Pokemon!" 
"Then stop making it sound like it's my fault I was late!" 
"I know it wasn't your fault!" 
"I know you know that!" 
"Fine!" 
"Fine!" 
"FINE!" they said together.
Everyone at the restaurant -- staff included -- was now staring at them. Pikachu had his face in his paws as Sparky patted his shoulder in sympathy; Ritchie and Serena sighed in unison. 
 Ash stared at his friends, bemused. "I thought we were ordering."
"...That's it?" Serena knew she sounded a little rude, but after all of that, it was hard not to be. 
"What do you mean, that's it?" Misty frowned. "I thought you two were hungry."
"Yeah, and Ritchie, didn't you wanna tell me about your trip through Alola?"
"C'mon, pick!" Misty tapped the top of Serena's menu. "We haven't got all night." 
Serena felt her jaw drop. She looked to Ritchie, whose face matched hers in indignation, and she looked to Sparky, whose eyes were bugging out. Her hands started to shake, and her menu with it. "...THAT'S IT!?"
It was Ash and Misty's turn to exchange looks. "Yeah." 
 "Somehow we managed to figure out how to make these arguments shorter." Misty explained, now scanning the menu. Serena wasn't sure if she was actually looking or just trying not to meet anyone else's eyes. 
 "And it's kinda hot when she's angry." Ash muttered to Ritchie, who didn't quite know how to react to that.
"You mean - you two - how do you - this is normal!?" Serena shrieked. Too late, she realized she was the one attracting stares now. Her face beet red, she slumped down in her seat. 
Ash and Misty exchanged confused looks, but it was Ritchie who spoke next: "You two have no idea how exhausting double dates with you can be."
"Ooh," said Misty, her eyes wide. "This is why Gary & Dawn kept cancelling on us!"
Ash snorted, shrugged, and grabbed another breadstick. "Aww, it's not that bad," he insisted. "You should hear Iris and Mallow." 
"Any mature couple will have their disagreements," said Misty, with something almost like pride in her voice. "I'm sure the two of you have found that out by now." 
Ritchie and Serena traded sheepish glances. "Well," said Ritchie, "we haven't exactly made a whole restaurant turn and stare -" 
"Ooh, Mist, I was gonna tell you," said Ash, not hearing Ritchie. "They found a new form of Starmie off Shamouti - it's this shiny silver color, and it's Water-Steel!"
Misty's enthusiasm launched them into another (thankfully positive) discussion. Though it did leave Ritchie & Serena out of the loop. 
 "How are you, Pikachu?" they asked Ash's Pokemon in weary unison. 
 ("Tired.") he sighed. ("They always get like this...")
"They seem happy," Ritchie whispered to Serena, and she couldn't argue. Still... 
"I just don't know how they can be so - so open about everything," she whispered back. "Whenever we get together, whether they're mad, sad, or glad -"
Ritchie smiled. "Nice rhyme," he said, and Serena couldn't help but giggle. 
"Man, you two are so luvvy-duvvy," Ash suddenly said.
Ritchie laughed. "Yeah, like you & Misty are ones to talk." He did reach over and take Serena's hand in his, however.
Ash pulled a face, but didn't say anything else except his order to their incredibly patient waiter. 
"You know we'll have to go extra on the tip to make up for this," Misty told her husband once all their orders were placed. "You owe it to them." 
"Me? You're the one who got mad when I walked in." 
"You're the one who was late." 
"Well, it's your turn to get the check." 
"But it's your turn for the tip." 
"Not again." Serena sighed and covered her face with her hands. Was there any couple she knew who was more shameless? 
"Sacha? Ondine? Bonsoir, mes amies, and 'ow are you - Serena! I t'ought your flight waz yesterday!"
It was Serena's turn to put her face in her hands. At least neither Ash nor Misty appeared to happy to see Miette either. Instead they looked pleadingly at Clian behind her.
 "What a fantastic taste!" said the Connoisseur. "Shall we all dine together?"
"Well," said Serena, "not to be rude, sir, but this was sort of a double date -"
"'Sir?'" Miette giggled. "He theenks too much of himself already, ma cherie. 'Rachid' or 'Cilan' will do."
"I hardly think anyone here needs reminding not to heed this young lady," said Cilan, his warning rather undercut by the way he and Miette wiggled their eyebrows at one another. "But we had no wish to interrupt." 
"We 'ave only just checked in," said Miette. "How eez ze 'double date?'"
Ash, Misty, Ritchie, and Serena all looked at each other. "Fine." four voices chorused to the newcomers. They were hardly about to tell the truth right now.
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tsoad · 3 years
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HE WAS ALREADY SEATED when I arrived, wedged at my table amid the usual clatter of boys. I had half-expected him not to be; that I had dreamed the morning. As I sat, I met his eyes, quickly, almost guiltily, then looked away. My face was flushing, I was sure. My hands felt heavy and awkward as they reached for the food. I was aware of every swallow, every expression on my face. The meal was very good that night, roasted fish dressed with lemon and herbs, fresh cheese and bread, and he ate well. The boys were unconcerned by my presence. They had long ago ceased to see me.
“Patroclus.” Achilles did not slur my name, as people often did, running it together as if in a hurry to be rid of it. Instead, he rang each syllable: Pa-tro-clus. Around us dinner was ending, the servants clearing the plates. I looked up, and the boys quieted, watching with interest. He did not usually address us by name.
“Tonight you’re to sleep in my room,” he said. I was so shocked that my mouth would have hung open.
But the boys were there, and I had been raised with a prince’s pride.
“All right,” I said.
“A servant will bring your things.”
I could hear the thoughts of the staring boys as if they said them. Why him? Peleus had spoken true: he had often encouraged Achilles to choose his companions. But in all those years, Achilles showed no special interest in any of the boys, though he was polite to all, as befitted his upbringing. And now he had bestowed the long-awaited honor upon the most unlikely of us, small and ungrateful and probably cursed.
He turned to go and I followed him, trying not to stumble, feeling the eyes of the table on my back. He led me past my old room and the chamber of state with its high-backed throne. Another turn, and we were in a portion of the palace I did not know, a wing that slanted down towards water. The walls were painted with bright patterns that bled to gray as his torch passed them.
His room was so close to the sea that the air tasted of salt. There were no wall pictures here, only plain stone and a single soft rug. The furniture was simple but well made, carved from dark-grained wood I recognized as foreign. Off to one side I saw a thick pallet.
He gestured to it. “That is for you.”
“Oh.” Saying thank you did not seem the right response.
“Are you tired?” he asked.
“No.”
He nodded, as if I had said something wise. “Me neither.”
I nodded in turn. Each of us, warily polite, bobbing our head like birds. There was a silence.
“Do you want to help me juggle?”
“I don’t know how.”
“You don’t have to know. I’ll show you.”
I was regretting saying I was not tired. I did not want to make a fool of myself in front of him. But his face was hopeful, and I felt like a miser to refuse.
“All right.”
“How many can you hold?”
“I don’t know.”
“Show me your hand.”
I did, palm out. He rested his own palm against it. I tried not to startle. His skin was soft and slightly sticky from dinner. The plump finger pads brushing mine were very warm.
“About the same. It will be better to start with two, then. Take these.” He reached for six leather-covered balls, the type that mummers used. Obediently, I claimed two.
“When I say, throw one to me.”
Normally I would chafe at being bossed this way. But somehow the words did not sound like commands in his mouth. He began to juggle the remaining balls. “Now,” he said. I let the ball fly from my hand towards him, saw it pulled seamlessly into the circling blur.
“Again,” he said. I threw another ball, and it joined the others.
“You do that well,” he said.
I looked up, quickly. Was he mocking me? But his face was sincere.
“Catch.” A ball came back to me, just like the fig at dinner. My part took no great skill, but I enjoyed it anyway. We found ourselves smiling at the satisfaction of each smooth catch and throw.
After some time he stopped, yawned. “It’s late,” he said. I was surprised to see the moon high outside the window; I had not noticed the minutes passing.
I sat on the pallet and watched as he busied himself with the tasks of bed, washing his face with water from a wide-mouthed ewer, untying the bit of leather that bound his hair. The silence brought my uneasiness back. Why was I here?
Achilles snuffed out the torch.
“Good night,” he said. “Good night.” The word felt strange in my mouth, like another language.
Time passed. In the moonlight, I could just make out the shape of his face, sculptor-perfect, across the room. His lips were parted slightly, an arm thrown carelessly above his head. He looked different in sleep, beautiful but cold as moonlight. I found myself wishing he would wake so that I might watch the life return.
- The Song of Achilles
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renee-mariposa · 4 years
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One way TROS could have ended if the writers weren’t hacks
As soon as her battered ship touches dirt and the cockpit opens, Rey’s panicked shouting cuts through the chaos on the base. “I need a medic here! I need...!”
Poe himself is reeling - shaking with adrenaline, head spinning with the unbelievable reality of we’re alive! we’re alive! - he needs to find Finn, he needs to...Rey is cut all to hell, dried blood all over her, and looks like she’s barely standing up. He reaches her just as she stumbles - he can’t believe she’s here, they’re all still here, this isn’t a dream - she’s heavy and he almost drops her. She’s only out for one moment, and when she comes back her eyes refocus on him slowly. “Poe?” she slurs, sounding bewildered.
“Rey!” he answers, unable to look away from her face - something he thought he’d never see again - shaking her a little in his arms, unable to voice anything else, unable to think over the din of celebration. Her brain comes back online and she grips a fistful of his jumpsuit - “I need a medic!” she panics, eyes wide, shaking him as if he needs to be convinced.
“Yeah, sure, just hold on!” he says, preparing himself to carry her to medical on his own to feet if he has to, when she shakes him again. 
“No, not me!” She gripes, somehow tugging them around to face her relic of a ship. “He’s in the gunner’s seat - he’s wounded! Please, Poe,” she implores, looking at him with a silent plea and he doesn’t really understand why, “I need your help.”
It’s on the tip of his tongue to ask what’s going on when the medical team finally arrives. It takes five of them to get the wounded man out of the seat - he’s a big guy - and if Poe thought Rey looked bad, he was clearly mistaken. The wounded man is young,  There’s a tense moment when they’re hooking up the scanners - Rey is trembling with the effort to remain somewhat standing, barely breathing in palpable fear - “We have a heartbeat!” one of the paramedics shouts, to be heard over everything else - Rey nearly passes out again with what Poe can only describe as sheer relief - and the entourage cuts back into the crowd to rush the wounded man to sickbay.
“Who is he?”
“I’ll tell you when I can hear myself think,” she says, avoiding his eyes. “We need to find Finn,” she says, gripping his jacket again. “And Rose. Where’s the General? Is Chewie okay?”
“One thing at a time,” Poe decides, visually scanning the crowd in what feels like building desperation. He needs to see Finn, needs to see that he’s alive and well, needs to see him smile and laugh again. “Let’s go find him.”
((Everyone hugs and cries like they do in the movie except there’s an actual gay kiss between Finn and Poe. Scene transition to the epilogue, still on the jungle planet.))
Rey only agrees to go to sickbay herself after visiting Leia’s deathbed and crying wearily, gripping Rose’s hand tightly the whole time. Rose remains while Finn and Poe escort Rey to the medics, but Rey stops them right before the three of them enter.
“I need to tell you something,” she says to them, calmly. She’s dead on her feet but grimly resolved. “I need to tell you who I brought back with me.”
Poe blinks. “Who is it?” he asks. She doesn’t answer immediately - she’s afraid, his brain supplies. “You can tell us,” he says gently. Finn nods in agreement, confused as to what’s going on but willing to listen.
“His name is Ben,” Rey says finally, visibly unsure of what to say. “He saved my life. More than once.” She searches their faces. “He’s very important to me.”
Into the silence, Finn jokes, “You had a cute boyfriend this whole time and you didn’t tell us?” and Rey frowns fondly at him, tension among them broken.
“The jury’s definitely out on cute,” Poe tells Finn in a stage whisper, causing Rey to frown at him, too. Poe restarts their three-legged march into sickbay. “He looks like death chewed him up and spat him out. He ain’t winning any beauty contests today.”
He can tell when Finn sees the wounded man - Finn stops dead in his tracks and nearly causes all three of them to wipe out. When Poe recovers his balance, he finds Rey gripping Finn’s shirt imploringly with all of her meagre strength.
“He’s the spy, Finn,” she says to him with an intensity Poe doesn’t understand. “He left the First Order just like you did.”
“Yeah, but...!” Finn protests, just now regaining his ability to speak.
Rey shakes him once, visibly shaking with the effort to remain standing, and Finn’s gaze snaps to her. Her face is deathly pale. “Please, Finn. He saved my life.”
Finn studies her, makes his decision. “Okay,” he says finally. Rey sighs with relief. “For you,” Finn gripes, and Rey almost smiles a little.
“Is he a stormtrooper?” Poe asks in confusion as they finally get Rey to a chair.
“Not exactly,” Finn mutters, and Rey very obviously elbows him. Poe tamps down a fission of irritation.
“Well, he can be processed with the former ‘troopers once he’s feeling better,” Poe decides, waiting for one of the medics to show. It’ll take some work and money, but they’ll get some doctors specializing in brainwashing to the base. The medic shows up, gets Rey some bacta patches. tells Rey to get some sleep, allows her to remain in sickbay to be near this Ben guy. She sits down on the hospital bed and, right as they’re leaving, Poe sees her take his hand and grip it tightly.
Poe and Finn walk back outside, hand in hand, to the roaring celebration. The defected stormtroopers are mostly helmet-less now, staring around in a daze, as if overwhelmed and not really sure how to celebrate. Looking out at the people he’s been chosen to command, the future unspools before Poe: rescuing the defectors from their brainwashing, tallying up what their people know how to do, sending out diplomats, building alliances, building a future. 
Together, he and Finn step out of the hallway into the bright, bright evening.
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