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Sides Incorrect Quotes #16

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Virgil: Logan, you do realize we’re adult and we reached out our definite size a while ago, right?

Logan: *sipping his 5th brick of milk* your point being?

Sides Incorrect Quotes #15

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Logan: you’re rolling your neck and shoulders a lot lately…

Virgil: just a little rough neck…

Logan: why don’t you straighten up?

Virgil: why would I change my orientation?…

Logan: I meant your back…

Roman: Which Disney couple would we be?

Virgil: Rapunzel and Eugene

Roman: so I get to save you, my damsel in distress with beautiful hair

Virgil: and I get to hit you with a frying pan!!!!

Roman: How about we choose a different one?

[Human au]

Virgil : really Remus, why are you like you are??

Remus : hmmm -

[flashback]

Logan : these films aren’t for children, Patton.

Patton : But Remus wants to know what’s in a human being? He really wants to and says he isn’t scared!

Logan : He’s six.

Patton : I won’t lie to him.

Logan, checking his calendar : Tell his therapist in approximately ten years about your reasoning for letting him persuade you into watching horror thrillers with him.

[Flashback ends]

Remus : I think I argued myself into this mess. Children are horrible advocates for major life decisions.

[The Dark Sides are out for a walk in the park, they see an outdoor birthday party]

Janus: Let’s steal the birthday presents.

Remus: Let’s kill the kids.

Virgil: LET’S NOT!

Remus : Sometimes I just need to jump into the darkness and scare some serial killers, so I don’t freak out. Can you relate to that at all?
Virgil : I’m.. I’m anxiety! When I walk down the street, it’s like holding hands with my paranoia and my adrenaline rushes. We just walk down the streets, skipping a bit for the extra energy.
Remus : Fair

Logan: Roman, give me the kazoo.

Roman: Aw, why?

Logan: It’s two in the morning, and you’ve been playing “Mary Had a Little Lamb” on it for five hours straight. Come on, give it.

Roman: *hands over the kazoo*

Logan: Thank you. *leaves*

Roman:…

Roman: *pulls out another kazoo*

Janus: Hey Roman, did you ever notice that there’s a ‘U’ in 'stupid’?

Roman: Well, there’s also an 'I’ in it too

Roman: …

Roman: Wait.

Patton: How does it feel knowing that people think you’re smart?

Logan: It’s pretty fun sometimes. People just assume that everything I say is correct.

Patton: How do you mean?

Logan: Hey Roman! Did you know that I’m 5'11 but 6'5 in dog years.

Roman: Woah… I wonder how tall I am in dog years…

Remus :,,, I’m an adult,,,

Roman : You are

Remus : so,,,

Roman : yes?

Remus : I made a blanket cave.

Roman : AWWWW

Remus : it’s in front of my bed and I want to have a “sleepover” in my cave, on the floor, right in front of my really comfortable bed

Roman : Do it.

Remus : MAYHEM! I WILL! NOBODY’S STOPPING ME

Roman: Hey, have you noticed that things ending with ‘ie’ are nice and cute? Like cutie, sweetie.

Patton: Cookie.

Remus: Die.

[over text]

Patton: Son, would you like me to pick up some McDonald’s?

Virgil: yes 🤤

Patton: What is that emojI? Where is it?

Virgil: uhhh scroll right alittle bit it’s next to this one 😠

Virgil: there’s also a beaglepuss somewhere

Virgil: it’s a new one they also added a worm

Patton: Where is the worm?

Virgil: animal section

Patton: There is an animal section???

Virgil: yeah?

Patton: 🤨😴

Virgil: dad?

Patton: 🐶🐛

Patton: 😊

Patton: 😍

Virgil: ok dad 😂 get me a double cheeseburger please and medium fries

Patton: 🍔🍟✨✨

Patton: Janus You’re mom showed me your report card. What do you have to say?

Teen Virgil: It is what it is

Remus: Do it, Thomas! Say the N word!!

Thomas: I am scared, I am so scared-

Virgil: Do it! Look at the meme, say the world.

Janus: You know you want it~

Thomas: N-.. Ni..

Remus: YES! *giggles hysterically*

Thomas, breathing hard: .. nice!

Virgil, cheering: HE DID IT!!!

Roman: So are We going to the mall?

Virgil, sarcastically: No we’re going to… that country you always say

Roman: … What?

Virgil: You know… That country you always say when you’re being sarcastic… I never heard of it before you started saying it

Roman: …

Roman: Oh! For the love of God and all that is holy, don’t say you mean Narnia

Virgil: That’s the one!

Roman : someone told me monsters don’t exist.

Roman, opening a door : but then I found this in my closet -

Remus, sitting on a toilet seat in the air : I snort dick before nap time.

Roman :.. yeah.

Remus : Also I think Disney sucks

Roman : MONSTER

How to eat hot food

Logan & Patton: wait until food is at a normal eating temperature

Janus: it’s totally not hot at all *screams and face turns bright red*

Remus: WITH YOUR BUTT

Roman & Virgil: take a bite, scream ow fuck that was hot, repeat

Janus: Ah, I see you’ve come back to apologize.

Virgil: Oh, no. I just didn’t want the delivery guy to think you ordered an entire pizza for yourself.

Thomas: Well, you made a lot of people here very nervous.

Remus: Oh yeah? That’s because they’re a bunch of bitch-ass white boys.

Virgil: I hate to break this to you, but you’re also a bitch-ass white boy.