#turin 2022

[iubris]

My fav Slavic queens 🇺🇦🇷🇸

#they deserved the top three tho #konstrakta was my winner for this year⭐️ #konstrakta #go a #esc 2022 #eurovision song contest #turin 2022 #in corpore sano #shum #Turin #esc #europa #eurovision #🇷🇸 #🇺🇦 #ukraine #serbien #Ucraina #Serbia #go_a #eurovision 2021 #esc 2021

[hannawatchesesc]

Norwegians raising important, nature-related questions

2014: What does the fox say?

2022: Can wolves eat bananas?

#Norway #Eurovison #eurovision 2022 #esc #esc 2022 #esc22 #ylvis #subwoolfer #turin #turin 2022 #euroviisut #euroviisut 2022 #eurovision song contest 2022 #eurovision song contest #eurovision final

[memesmunsigra]

#eurovision #eurovision memes #eurovision song contest #eurovision 2022 #subwoolfer #turin 2022 #esc 2022 #france #norway #iceland #ukraine #esc meme #give that wolf a banana #ylvis #what does the fox say #reject modernity embrace tradition #systur

[kostjabocharov]

same bestie

#eurovision #italy #turin 2022 #mahmood #blanco

[orangecoloreddreams]

Watching Eurovision and seeing Sheldon Riley, who is on the autism spectrum, absolutely made me sob. Not only because his pain is, unfortunately, so relatable to me and my experience as an autistic person, but also because it was so unbelievably inspiring to see an autistic person on stage. I rarely see people on the spectrum represented so there were some happy tears too. And I’m so thankful to him for spreading the message that autism isn’t something we have to ‘overcome’. The thing that is holding us back is mostly the limiting believes of others. And the symbolism of the unmasking he did at the end was absolutely beautiful. Also, he just sounds like an angel.

#I love how his song can be interpreted to be about so many other things as well #sheldon riley #not the same #eurovison 2022 #eurovision #eurovison song contest #Australia #autism #actually autistic #autism spectrum disorder #turin 2022 #unmasking #masking #autistic positivity #autistic community #autistic acceptance #autistic artist

[jsmithcameronx]

Eurovision Song Contest 2022 - Big 5

#eurovision #eurovision 2022 #esc 2022 #turin 2022 #eurovision song contest #giffingpale #palemakers #esc #music #gif #gif:p #gif:music #* #gif* #music* #esc* #200+ #i do this every year #so here it is #france is killer #i love it #and i like spain a lot #it's fun #i like the others too #but a normal amount lol

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2022: #02 & #01

02. SPAIN Chanel - “SloMo” 3rd place

Decade Ranking: 3/79 [above Daði Freyr, below Konstrakta]

LET’S GO!

At last, I get to show my TRUE CHANEL STAN COLOURS <333333 I mean, i’m sorry for those who aren’t a fan, but SloMo was incredibly good. Chanel succeeds like no other where recent girlbosses like Eleni and Hurricane have failed - she brings out my inner squealing f*ggot and I LOVED every second in me. 

TAKE A VIDEO, WATCH IT SLO MO MO MO MO

BOOTY HYPNOTIC, MAKE ME WANT MO MO MO MO Just when you think you’ve outgrown the vapid bangers, Chanel surges forwards as a human conduit of rainbow energy and leaves you scalped and gagged and eaten. The definition of PUSSY. SLAY. CUNT. 

Y no se confundan, señoras y señores, “SloMo” is not that great of a song, I recognize that. It’s a 7/10 J-Lo reject and you can tell.  It easily could have veered into Sekret territory and become an embarrassing debaucherous cumdumpsterfire. 

But it didn’t. 🙂 

Because Chanel wouldn’t allow it. Which is impressive given her journey. See, this is another area where Chanel obseletes the Elenii and Hurricanes of this world - she was an underdog all the way through - The Spaintards (not to be confused with “Eurovision fans from Spain”) have long since forgotten but they used to loathe Chanel for daring to beat Tanxugueiras (really, her?) and Rigoberta (kinda valid at the time, but less so now obv), hurled abuse at her in a ploy to force her to quit, and when that didn’t work angrily groused RTVE to make JURIES LESS POWERFUL so a disaster like this couldn’t happen again!!! There’s a reason Chanel no longer wants to perform SloMo and wishes to move on in her life, and honestly, same girl re: ESC2022.

 In spite of all that, Chanel remained motivated and chipper put in all the effort of the world at every single performance, and unlike Cornelia improved every time. You may not like it, but THIS is what peak performance looks like. 

Was this the best live performance of all times? The fact that I’m considering it should tell you enough. It’s definitely the best live performance of a Girlbanger For The Gays since “My Number One”. Numbers do not lie. THIRD in the jury vote, THIRD in the televote, THIRD overall. 

The best part is that I did NOT see it coming? Like going into the finale, it was clear Kalush and Cornelia would come top five, and having seen the rehearsal footage, I was confident Konstrakta and Sam join them as well. I NEVER saw Chanel’s top five coming. I was convinced, cynic that I am, that she would be my default Doomed Favourite and that Brividi would eat her TV alive and the juries would ignore her. Instead, she demolished Blahmood and Blancunt, and left no crumbs. 

Afterwards, Chanel casually fanned herself as golden sparks flowed from the ceiling, a visual representation of her arch. She knew right then and there that she’d NAILED it and made herself proud.

“SloMo” was the pinacle of achievement in this year, a tale of overcoming adversity, working hard and tirelessly to accomplish be as best as you can be and proof that, no matter how deep your depths get, even the shittiest countries can accomplish great things if they keep on trying. It was #Inspiring. But above anything, it was mostly three minutes of unbrindled trashy fun that makes me SQUEAL in gayvoice. #GayPowersRestored.

And now she is THE MOST POPULAR / BEST ESC ENTRY OF ALL TIMES, as per ESCRadio’s top 250. I should hate this given what it implies about Chanel’s fanbase and also fuck Chanel’s fanbase, but I enjoyed SloMo more than Euphoria anyway, so... i... actually... agree with the results. HA HAHA HA HA HAA HAHA HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!

and now for a #1 that hopefully surprises nobody. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

#01. SERBIA Konstrakta - “In corpore sano” 5th place

Decade Ranking: 2/79 [Above Chanel, below Shum]

 ~OnaS eroProC Ni SomRefNe SneM~

WHAT COULD BE THE SECRET BEHIND THE PHENOMENON KONSTRAKTA? 

WHAT COULD IT BE?

WHAT COULD BE THE SECRET BEHIND THE PHENOMENON KONSTRAKTA?

WHAT COULD IT BE?

WHAT COULD BE THE SECRET?

I believe the answer lies in a stroke of brilliance. 🙂 It’s honestly near impossible to unspool “In corpore sano” and all of its layers in words because *everything* interlocks with each other perfectly. But we all know WHY we’re here

👏 BITI ZDRAVA 👏 👏 BITI ZDRAVA 👏 👏 BITI ZDRAVA 👏 👏 BITI ZDRAVA 👏

 ✋🤚 BIT 🤚✋ BIT ✋🤚  BIT🤚✋   BIT  ✋🤚   BITI ZDRAVA 

Through the power of Soap, Friendship and Biti Zdrava, Konstrakta and her kabal of spa zealots effortlessly enrolled the entire anti-vaxx country of Serbia and its minions into her Health Cult. I couldn’t be more giddy that this went to Eurovision. How could I not be/: an underground gothic pop song, the first  Eurovision entry to use BLACK HUMOUR as its preferred means of communication.😍😍 Black humour is the best humour, so yeah anything that opens with inspecting Megan Markle’s Healthy Hair, and follows it up casually informing us that a giant spleen is undesirable and ugly and may cause the irreversible condition known as death 🙂 is InstaFave material. 

BETTER WASH MY HANDS AGAIN BEFORE I BECOME SICK. IF I GET ILL, I DIE 🙂

The real genius though comes from the fact that Konstrakta took a VERY serious concept (the lack of health insurance for all the self-employed, which in Serbia includes anyone working in the culture sector), and a VERY personal topic (the death of a close friend, who passed away because he couldn’t afford aforementioned healthcare without the insurance) and turned it into a socially-critical parody. 

“In corpore sano” may be completely in Serbian and Latin (LATIN <333333) but it is also fluent in the hidden language of Sarcasm 😍 Konstrakta nailed the exercution with her flat, deadpan demeanor and anemic delivery. This is one such a case where being as low-energy as possible works miracles. She’s the 🔥 THIS IS FINE 🔥 meme incarnated in human form. 

(or for those that have played Baldur’s Gate, she has the exact same personality and demeanor as Xan <3)

WHY DON’T I JUST SAVE MYSELF THE EFFORT AND JUST LIE DOWN AND DIE? 🙂

The dichotomy of Konstrakta praising the efficiency of the autonomous nervous system or good hydration because they help keep the body hale (finally safe! God Grant Us Health!), juxtaposed to compusively washing your hands showing that she’s ridding herself of her germs but losing the battle against her dark thoughts (I Am Left On my Own), was some galatic-level storytelling genius. It is SO impressively clever, on a level you almost never see at ESC and if you do is usually executed poorly.

Which brings us to the act. Usually songs with A Profound Hidden Meaning resort to pedantic staging full of hidden symbolism. It’s tiresome to engage with when you’re ultimately tuning into have a good time. “In corpore sano” for all its ingenuity and snark, never attempts to be smarter than it is. 

At its core ICS is Nurse Pratchett and her five patients (two twunks, two stern-faced top-knot ladies and able-bodied Peter Dinklage) acting out some Biti Zdrava nonsense, and it’s all very fascinating, occult and sinister. There’s clearly more going in, some artistic vision but do you need to understand the backstory in order to get the song? 

I don’t think so. 

The hidden depths are a nothing more than a reward for the discernible sleuth willing to learn delve more deeply, and if you don’t, you can at least still get off by hand-clapping and exfoliating. This is how highbrow staging should be done. It rewards both value seekers AND those tuning in for a good time. Hans Pancake dead in a ditch (again.)

So um yeah, overall, as you know (if you’ve followed my ranking of all 2010s songs), you know that I’ll put a clever cookie with an avant garde pearl and excellent on-point emotional delivery first in any year, at any moment. “In corpore sano” isn’t quite on the level of Shum, but I can defo say that the 2020s are now 2/2 in terms of iconic favourites 🤗 

So that’s it for the 2022 ranking. I hope you’ve enjoyed this marathon more than I did (making the gifs at the end was REALLY painful because my computer’s HDD is nearing death AND my internet is slow), in any case it’s finally OVAH!! 

Let’s hear it out ONE LAST TIME for the best entry of 2022: SERBIA:

MENS INFIRMA IN CORPORE SANO

ANIMUS TRISTIS IN CORPORE SANO

MENS DESPERTA IN CORPORE SANO

MENS CONTERRITA IN CORPORE SANO

I STA CEMO SAD?

Why, I rank 2023 of course . 🧐 Probably very quickly and in some limited capacity (maybe 5 per post again) but I should be able to finish before my birthday (08/05) which is when the first dress rehearsal footage is released. I’m off to Amsterdam for EIC though, so stay tuned for the updates if and when I get back!!!

THE RANKING:

#Eurovision 2022 #ESC 2022 #Turin 2022 #Eurovision #Eurovision Song Contest #Spain #Chanel #SloMo #Serbia #Konstrakta #In Corpore Sano #BorisBubbles #Ranking #Full Ranking

[vaguely-tricksy]

 I love the Italian commentator

He’s a middle aged singer who just wants to do duets with everyone and every time a new country comes in he goes like “OMG it’s country X I had a boyfriend from there once but it didn’t work out, he wasn’t enough for me” like every single one, I’m not even kidding, KING

#esc #italy #esc 2022 #eurovision #eurovision 2022 #eurovision song contest #eurovision song contest 2022 #turin 2022 #italian commentator

[kakumeinoyuuki]

What is this duet?!?!

I am uncomfortable....

#Eurovision #Eurovision Song Contest #ESC 2022 #Turin 2022

[lunlumo]

All jokes 'haha Italians and chaos' aside I really really want this to work

Loving every single one of 1700 bushes in GREEN green room

Loving those arches, make them WORK PLEASE

Loving the water, please someone use the water

Yes maybe all of this made things way too complicated and now the stage is barely doing it's basic functions and everything is on fire but it's an original thing, I want them to succeed

#eurovision #esc #eurovision 2022 #turin 2022 #stage #italy

[leben-s-freude]

whoever wins should be baptised in the waterfall

#eurovision song contest #esc 2022 #Turin 2022

[elenthali]

i’m usually up for uk slander 24/7 but sam ryder seems lovely and if anyone makes him sad i’ll cry

#eurovision 2022 #esc 2022 #esc #sam ryder #uk eurovision #uk #eurovision #turin 2022

[hannawatchesesc]

As we all know, Finland translates all the songs in Eurovision. And because of that, we get gems like these

#eurovision #euroviisut #esc #eurovision song contest #esc 2022 #euroviisut 2022 #finland #eurovision 2022 #suomi #turin #turin 2022 #the netherlands

[booblompo]

#esc #eurovision #turin 2022 #like they’ve effed this up so bad

[escinsight]

ESC Insight Presets... Eurovision Wars: Russia vs Ukraine (2021-2022)

ESC Insight Presets... Eurovision Wars: Russia vs Ukraine (2021-2022)

The Eurovision Song Contest cannot help but be a lens on society, and none more so when issues of war, dissent, and politics come to the fore.  In 2022, Eurovision Wars was a Spotify exclusive; we are proud to welcome Phil Dore to the ESC Insight team, and we are delighted to present Eurovision Wars to a wider audience over the next weeks and months. ESC Insight Presets… Eurovision Wars: Russia…

View On WordPress

#Alina Pash #esc #eurovision #eurovision song contest #invasion #jamala #kalush orchestra #politics #russia #turin 2022 #ukraine #war

[maytheforcebewithyourfandom]

I don't know if they showed it on TV, but the WHOLE audiance stood up during Ukraine's performance at yesterday's ESC semifinal. So many people were carrying Ukranian flags even though they were from another competing country. It was quite a beautiful thing to see

#eurovision #esc 2022 #eurovision 2022 #turin 2022 #first semifinal #ukraine #esc ukraine #me