might be heaven and it might be hell
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i've seen a lot of gross shit on simblr before but all of that feels fucking minuscule in comparison to what i just found. the cc creator @squaresverse aka satanshubby on instagram made this disgusting fucking cc using the autopsy photo of a murdered 4 year old boy.
and if that wasn't bad enough, they have this cc paywalled so they can profit off of it too.
the boy in the photo wasn't identified until late 2022, over 60 years since he was brutally murdered and left nude on the side of a road and just the thought of someone seeing this picture which is clearly of a beaten child and deciding it fits their streetwear aesthetic and would go great on their cc is nauseating. i cannot begin to describe how evil this is.
rip joseph augustus zarelli.
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But imagine you are Dr Watson coming home from Switzerland and suddenly standing in a sitting room that used to be yours, and there is a book he bought and did not bring along and sheet music for a composition you will never hear him play and there are the notes for a case he will never solve and a new summer coat he will never wear and the flowers that Mrs Hudson placed on the table which faded unseen by him and the tobacco that he will never smoke and the concert ticket that expired because when the curtain rose, he stood at the brink of the Reichenbach Falls and you were not there.
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So I think one thing that really drives Feanor is his grief– he looses Miriel, and he very clearly never recovers from that. There's the pain of loosing a parent and the added layer of Miriel's death being, on some level, a choice to leave Feanor. You can't tell me he didn't internalize the idea that he wasn't good enough for his mother to stay ay least a little. And I can't help but imagine that most of Valinor really wasn't helpful. There was probably a lot of vague sympathy with no real understanding of the situation, people who in theory thought Feanor had the right to grieve but reacted pretty badly to any actual displays of grief, and some people who insisted that Miriel chose to stay dead, Finwe and Indis were happily married, and therefore, Feanor shouldn't feel sad about it anymore. Even for those with more understanding of grief, it's still a really complicated situation. But you know who would understand Feanor?
Elrond. And the reason is Elros and Arwen– Elrond knows what it's like when someone you love dearly chooses to leave you, essentially forever, not because they don't care about you or because you weren't good enough, but because they have to make the best choice for themselves. And how you can respect that choice, and be glad that they did what they needed to, but still grieve them and the relationship you had with them. He understands those complicated feelings and how to process them in a healthy and non-destructive way.
And I'm losing my mind over this because Feanor is the one who starts the kinslayings and the cycle of violence between elves, and Elrond is the end result of all that violence; born to two refugees and raised largely by Feanor's sons. But despite all that, he's good and kind and able to focus on healing instead of pain. He ends the violence and makes a sanctuary where everyone is welcome. And he's able to do what Feanor never could, and not be consumed by his pain. And that means so much.
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(Need more angst >:] for Shadow Milk Cookie)
Can I request Shadow Milk Cookie x Reader who sacrifice there life on saving Shadow Milk Cookie from a fight that HE started and wanted to happen???
No.. no no no no..
NO!
Shadow Milk Cookie held you in his arms, his face slack with grief and horror. He didn't.. he didn't mean for this.. not you, anyone but you..
You were crumbling in his arms. Your expression.. he doesn't even know how to describe it. Peace? Contentment? Resignation? He can't tell, and now he'll never be able to ask you.
He had started the fight. Some foolish Cookies who thought they could best him, and he wanted to prove them wrong. He wanted to make them all suffer, but then you-!
You..
He held your body closer, tears streaming down his now blank face. His grief and anguish slowly turned to an all-consuming rage.
Shadows danced and warped as he turned his head towards the Cookies who dared to take his beloved from him.
Cookies he would crumble, and rip the Life out of, to bring you back.
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Can we see a Regressor!Alastor and a CG!Rosie fanfic: Basically Alastor has a nightmare/flashback to his biological mother's death which causes him to regress involuntarily, and Rosie comforts him.
Of course! Sorry if it's short!
TW: Talk of Death
Rosie woke up to screaming. Not unusual, considering it's Cannibal Town, but the screaming didn't stop. She quickly got out of bed, rushing to Alastor's nursery, finding him crying in his crib.
"Oh, honey... Hey, come here," Rosie cooed, picking up her little fawn and hugging him close. She sat down in an old rocking chair, rocking gently to calm him down.
Alastor continued to cry into her chest.
"Oh, sweet boy... Something's really got you worked up, huh?" Rosie asked, pulling a blanket around him to increase the pressure, knowing it normally helped him.
"Mama!" Alastor called out.
Oh. Rosie understood what was wrong now. They'd been talking about his birth mother before heading to bed last night.
"Oh Bambi... I'm sorry," Rosie cooed, holding him close as she rocked him.
"Mama..." He hiccupped into her chest.
"I know, sweet boy... I know... Shhh... Do you want a baba?" Rosie offered. Alastor nodded, looking up at Rosie. Rosie tucked a strand of hair back, smiling sadly. "That must've been a really bad dream, huh, honey?"
"Uh huh. Mama dead again," Alastor said. "Mommy never dyin', right?"
"Of course not, honey. I certainly can't die again," Rosie said, hoping she could keep that promise. Alastor seemed satisfied with that answer, burying his face in her chest again. Rosie stood up, carrying Alastor into the kitchen.
Rosie made quick work of making his bottle, before carrying him back to his room and laying him down on her lap. She placed the nipple in his mouth. Alastor looked like he was fighting sleep.
"Close your eyes, sweets. Mommy's not going anywhere," Rosie reassured.
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Dear Nex,
You're never going to see this. I know. I felt the need to write this for you anyway.
Maybe my input isn't needed because I'm cis, but I hope you and everyone else who sees this knows in spite of my gender identity and the privilege I have as a cis male that I'm aware that I have, I mean every word that I say. I never wanted to be privileged. I don't want to be privileged. I'm so incredibly sorry that I'm privileged. I know it's not right. I know it's not fair. If my input isn't needed, so be it. But I'm going to share it anyway.
My sorrow and rage and pain has not at all subsided since February 20, when I learned of your death. You've been in the back of my mind ever since. The grief and anger hasn't gone away. What your friends said about you and your family as well, shows that you were such a wonderful person. I wonder if you had social media. I would've loved to be your friend if you had Tumblr.
I find myself enjoying sunny weather and thinking "Nex would've liked this". I look at my friends' pet cats and think about Zeus. When listening to rock I wonder if you liked the song I listen to.
You were mistreated by your peers in life, because of your laugh, which I'm sure was wonderful, and the way you dressed. Being yourself cost you your life. And now even in death people refuse to respect you. Transphobes running rampant, calling you your deadname, someone here on Tumblr celebrating your death, labeled as filth. And now? Now your cause of death has been labeled as suicide. Even though absolutely none of it makes sense, and nothing adds up. It just doesn't make sense. And even if somehow you did commit suicide, the day before you did you were physically assaulted by your peers for getting fed up with being mocked. You were bullied before that too. Bullied relentlessly and mercilessly just for being you. The blood is still on their hands.
I'm utterly disgusted by the medical examiner, the state of Oklahoma, the transphobes, even myself sometimes for being so privileged because of my gender identity. I shouldn't be privileged for being cis. We should all be accepted and treated fairly and with care and love and respect. If only things were that ideal..
I'm crying now even as I write this. I so desperately wish that everything was different. That you weren't killed. That you could continue to hang out with your friends and be a kid. Making new recipes. Playing with Zeus. Playing your favorite songs. Making music, if you liked doing that.
Recently my faith and belief in God has been tested. But if there's an afterlife, a Heaven up there, I hope you're having fun and enjoying yourself up there. When I die and reach Heaven, I'll be sure to visit you.
On the other hand, if there's not a Heaven, I hope you're enjoying your eternal rest. Whatever being dead is like without an afterlife, I hope you're ok.
But until then I'm going to try my damndest to ensure your memory stays alive. Posting about you on social media and reblogging posts about you like wildfire so people never forget. I'm not going to let anyone forget you, Nex. I promise you. Me and all of the other people grieving here on Tumblr will continue to say your name, whether our shouts fall on deaf ears or not. We're never going to be silenced.
I raise my cup to you, Nex. You will be avenged. Justice will be served.
I didn't know you and I never will. You never knew me and you never will. But all the same, even if we're eternally strangers, I love you, Nex Benedict. I'm sorry the school failed you, I'm sorry the ambulance failed you, I'm sorry Oklahoma failed you, I'm sorry the world failed you. And perhaps I failed you somehow. And I'm so unbelievably sorry if I did. But I hope keeping your memory alive, and saying your name, and seeking justice can make up for it.
Until we're angels in Heaven once more.
Love, truly,
Finley
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Questioning schizoid culture is standing in the house of someone you know with 100% certainty that you loved and cared about who died and feeling nothing. It's forcing yourself to remember the times you spent together because they won't come naturally and feeling nothing - no nostalgia, no love, no pain. It's hating yourself for not feeling grief, for not feeling a pinch of sadness, for standing hollow and pathetic in their lifeless home, and hoping that self-hate is its own sense of grief, that it means you really do miss them, because if it doesn't then did you really love them at all?
-
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(bye this is my first time posting a story on tumblr.. this is also on my ao3, maes)
“Will?” Nico found himself turning around at the voice of Kayla, Will’s sister.
Nico’s heart seemed to stop, his eyes widened and his body unmoving. Nico stared as his boyfriend pulled a hand back from his stomach only for Will’s hand to be covered in crimson.
Shit.
“Will? Will—“ Nico surged forward, catching his boyfriend before he could fall.
Will looked at him, Nico was breathing hard and had shaky hands. Will’s expression for the first time was unreadable—it was void of anything.
Until Will gave him a small smile and placed his other hand on Nico’s shoulder.
“It’s okay, Nico.” Will murmured, his voice strained.
Nico didn’t want to break, especially in front of Kayla, Austin, and Lou Ellen. It was the stupidest of reasons this was happening, really.
The gods.
“No, no I can—“ Nico muttered.
“Nico,”
“Will, please! Please, I—“
“Nico. Listen to me.”
Nico looked up at him, his face wet with unwanted tears. This couldn’t happen again, not after so many times.
“I love you, di Angelo.” Will seemed to glow—even at this moment.
“I love you in every universe, Solace.”
“I know.”
“I’ll find you, I’ll save you. I promise.” Nico cried as Will put a hand on his cheek. “They won’t take you again. Never.”
Will just had that look again. His eyes crinkled and he smiled. “Don’t say that, Nico.”
“I love you, Will.”
“And I love you, Nico.”
Nico watched as Will’s body went stiff—then still and then gone. His heart died a little bit more every time.
The one hundred and sixteenth time.
He turned his watch back.
chapter 2
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Will Benji really become a doctor when he grows up? I think even Mordecai can confirm that he has potential. 😁
He does indeed! He’s got his Aunt Rosie’s personality and Mordecai’s smarts. Overall, he’s very responsible and caring! Only after the death of his mostly-absent mother does he briefly struggle, having a hard time dealing with the complex emotions that brought on and subsequently getting caught up with the wrong crowd as a freshman in college. But Mordecai does manage to step up to the situation and Benjamin got back on his feet, afterward excelling in his schooling and eventually becoming a doctor at Barnes Hospital. He’s a natural caregiver! Consider it the universe trying to even out all the trouble Mordecai caused in his youth.
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okie dokie @quixtrix
Gonna also tag @dextraicarus1994 since he’s a splinter cell fan and most likely has information to add to this discussion
We've heard the phase "everyone is the hero of their own story" at least once and while it's debatable if that is really true of everyone , there are some people who genuinely and unquestionably believe themselves to be the hero
And Sarah Fisher is one of those people
Unlike my Jade post, I'll be working somewhat backwards when it comes to evidence of my theory, primarily because one of the things that convinced me that Sarah has a hero complex was something that happens closer to the end of the first season
In the last episodes of CLH, we learn about Sarah's name and backstory. Her childhood where she got her father arrested , her military education and finally the death of her father
Sarah is a confusing character and until we get season two , theres so many questions surrounding her and very few, if any, answers to those questions
Did Sarah plan everything that happens in the show? If not, how much was Sarah's plan? Was her conversation with Dolph and Marcus genuine or an act? Or some combination of both?
What does Sarah really want out of all this? Did she have any involvement with Rayman becoming Ramon? If so, she's now the last of the board of directors and thus is in complete control of Eden, so what else can she possibly want?
And despite knowing first hand Eden killed her father , why did Sarah forego her human body and become a cyborg spider , essentially another cog in the machine that murdered her own father?
Is Sarah even "Sarah" anymore?
Then it clicked into my head that, the entire sequence of Sarah inside the VR , experiencing her past mistakes and trauma?
Can be read as a test of Sarah's convictions
Or other words, from her perspective ,she was on the hero's journey
And what's a common trope heroes experience? Challenges against their beliefs
Now obviously Sarah's character doesn't actually fit into the hero's journey , at least not without some twisting here. That is not important, what's important is that Sarah believes herself as the hero regardless of her actual circumstances or position in the world
Take note of how the hero's journey is about transformation specifically, as I want to draw a parallel to the anime/manga known as Land of the Lustrous. I don't want to spoil too much of that series as this is meant as a CLH post (I also need to catch up) but there is three pages from Land of the Lustrous I want to share
People who know of this series knows exactly what I'm implying about Sarah with this comparison, but for those who don't know what this manga is about: these three pages only has one character in them
Land of the Lustrous (or Houseki no Kuni) is a story set in a world where humans went extinct, but other humanoid lifeforms evolved from that extinction with one of those being immortal and genderless beings made of gemstones
The main character is one of these gem people called phosphophyllite ,phos for short, and their story is basically:
"what if the ship of theseus was a living being with a conscious?"
Keeping spoilers as minimum as possible, Phos , physically and mentally, undergoes drastic changes throughout the narrative both from circumstances beyond their control and the choices they've made
I believe , much like Phos, Sarah herself is a conscious ship of theseus
I want to bring attention to the connections between Bullfrog and Sarah , both in design and in narrative
Sarah's hair is the same colour as Bullfrog's hood , as well as being styled in a way that resemblances said hood. Both of these characters have colour palettes that share similarities with each other , in that they both primarily wear a monochromatic uniform with silver
They both also happen to have eye colours that's some shade of gold . Dolph's mother in the manga also has gold eyes. Coincidentally, both Bullfrog and Sarah are characters Dolph began to trust after he killed Alex for his betrayal
Bullfrog however leans more into wearing white while Sarah leans towards black, which happen to be colours used to represent themes of conflicting opposites , such as yin and yang or good vs evil
The other difference between them is Sarah has green accents while Bullfrog has red, which makes Bullfrog's palette more warmer while Sarah's is colder , fitting considering their personalities
Funny enough Bullfrog is a cold blooded frog hybrid. Meanwhile Sarah was is a human with a warm skin complexion
Red and Green are also opposites on the colour wheel, much like how Bullfrog and Sarah are opposites in the conflict between Assassins and Templars
Red and Green however, are complimentary colours too
As of season one we have very little regarding Bullfrog's life before the events of the show, but I'm betting my kidneys his life has some uncanny similarities with Sarah's
Remember how I said Sarah doesn't fit the hero's journey without twisting some things?
Bullfrog is an undeniable loyal, genuine character who does what he does out of the kindness of his heart. Bullfrog's heroism comes from caring for others and wanting justice
Sarah however, I believe has a hero complex that drives from her ego and a desire to control others
You can even say Sarah is a twisted remix of a hero
We can actually take a guess what experiences Bullfrog may have had in his life by comparing Sarah's life itself to the hero's journey set up, but let’s just focus on Sarah
I just want to have it at the back of our minds that Bulfrog’s life has likely paralleled with Sarah’s when we go down these points
Call to adventure: This is obviously when Sarah leaves the wasteland with Sam, her father , into Eden
Supernatural aid: Sam meets up with Marcus, who hacks the systems to help Sam and Sarah out
Threshold, beginning of transformation: Sarah snitches on the watch dogs
I want to put some attention to this moment of Sarah’s life as it has had a significant impact on her. Not only did her father loose custody of her and she was placed into Eden’s child care system (or whatever they do with Ray kids who expose their parents doing anything illegal) and was exposed to even more brain washing propaganda without any outside influence (her father) , but more importantly this was the first time in Sarah’s life where she had power over someone else’s fate
When Sam asks why Sarah did what she did, she replies “we have to do the right thing”. Looking at her body language , Sarah is not happy to be doing what she’s doing but fully believes, with no doubts despite her pained expression , it’s what she has to do , it’s the right thing to do
It seems odd, that Sarah was this heavily brainwashed and Sam was unaware of it up till this moment. Considering the wasteland is well, a literal wasteland I doubt there was much after school activity programs to influence Sarah this much. Sam seemed like a very attentive single parent so I can’t imagine the guy would let such pro Eden propaganda influences, such as the Rayman kids’ programs, anywhere near Sarah. Considering how young Sarah is in this flashback as well , she wasn’t exactly at the age of sneaking off and hanging with the wrong crowd
Unless Sam wasn’t Sarah’s only parent
Having a quick skim of the Splinter Cell wiki, Sarah’s mother in the games is a woman called Regan burns. Regan and Sam were on opposing sides during their military careers but that didn’t stop them from having a stormy affair, which lead to Regan becoming pregnant and having a troubled marriage with Sam. In the games Regan is cryptanalyst for the NSA , but who is Regan in the remixed universe?
During his introduction Bullfrog rambled about how his ancestors memories live on in his DNA , which is a reference to how in the assassins creed games people can use technology (or other means depending on game) to travel through the memories of their relatives (both close and distant) and learn information from them, it’s even how some get their assassin training
In some stories of the franchise, the main character is the direct child of an assassin, which puts further emphasis on bloodlines and their importance in the assassins creed
Just so happens, the templars use technology to travel through memories and bloodlines play an important role in their organisation , just like the assassins they’re up against
So it’s possible that, in this universe , Regan was a Templar and how she raised her daughter is what influenced Sarah “to do the right thing” and how Sarah was exposed to propaganda such as Rayman’s shows right under Sam’s nose
If Regan was a Templar, that could explain how Sarah not only knew about the order, but managed to get into the position she currently has in show. Regan’s influerence may also have given Sarah (and to some degree Sam) some advantages other people could only dream off, such as an opportunity to have a comfortable life in Eden and her military education
Thanks to Regan, Sam was still allowed to communicate with his daughter despite being a traitor
Dolph , as a fellow soldier in comparison, was taken from his mother and not even allowed any contact with her. He suffered so much just by virtue of having “good genetics”, Dolph and his mother in comparison did not commit any crime and yet ended up with a worse life than Sarah and Sam
If Regan is alive or not in the show does not matter now, what matters is that she was present in Sarah’s life long enough to make an impact on the girl
I do want to say while this was the beginning of Sarah’s transformation, the little girl wasn’t beyond saving at this moment in time
But Sarah, as stubborn as she is, doesn’t want to be saved
Sarah wants to save others
Challenges and temptations: Sarah’s years in the education system and her military training
Revelation , death and rebirth: Sam dies and Sarah makes the choice to become a cyborg
During their last conversation, Sarah brings up that thanks to her good grades, she’s been given the opportunity in becoming a cyborg. Sam is heavily against it , the two argue
Something interesting to note here is how defensive Sarah is of Eden , telling Sam “if Eden was so bad, you wouldn’t be in probation you’d be in jail” , and that he should be grateful Sarah is being given this opportunity at all “despite being the daughter of a traitor”
Sarah does not trust Sam to know what’s best. Not only for his daughter, but also not even for himself
When talking about how Sam died and her grief over losing her father, Sarah asked herself “was he right?”. Worth noting, Sarah never tells Dolph the answer to that question
That’s important because while it shows that Sarah did have doubts about Eden , no , herself , when it comes to how the world works, her behaviour in the last episode tells us exactly what the answer to that question is:
Sarah decided the answer doesn’t matter
What mattered was protecting her father from HIMSELF, and she failed
This was the moment Sarah’s fate was sealed
This was the moment Sarah shallowed her doubts, made the conscious choice to become a cyborg that would set her on the path to become sigma and never looked back
Regardless if she was influenced by Eden propaganda or her mother, Sarah came to her own conclusion about something that day: “order and peace will come through control and rules”
Sam , and all those innocent people, would still be alive if they just did what they were told
If Sam just did want Sarah told him to do
Before I talk about the last two points of the hero’s journey, transformation and atonement , I want to go back to that moment in Sarah’s childhood. The one where she had power
At an incredibly young age , even if it was just this one moment, Sarah had power over the lives of others and influence over what happens to those lives. This likely also made Sarah feel responsible for those around her , particularly feeling strongest towards her own father and his well being. This is where Sarah’s hero complex stems from
I’ve talked a lot about the hero complex, but what exactly is the hero complex?
“Noted author Laura Berman Fortgang, described the Hero Syndrome as a phenomenon affecting people who seek heroism or recognition, usually by creating a desperate situation which they can resolve and subsequently receive the accolades from. This can include unlawful acts, such as arson and attempted murder.” (Link here for further information about this)
We can actually see Sarah display this behaviour early on in the show, particularly in her treatment of team Ghost. The planting of bombs into their skulls under her control is the most obvious example but there’s two others I want to talk about
In the ending of episode 3, Sarah swoops in to rescue Dolph from his own suicide attempt. What she tells Dolph in this scene is damning evidence of her need for control over other people
“I’m the one who decides where and when you die”
Knowing in hindsight that she’s a Templar cyborg , she likely purposely planned it so that the news would catch her “saving” Dolph and label her as a traitor
Why exactly? Can’t really say, but I bet some part of it is just to give Sarah a little ego boost , convince the world she’s the underdog hero she sees herself as
But we can go further than that , in that Sarah wants control over how people live their lives, not just when those lives end in how Jade is treated by her
It’s really easy to assume Jade’s role in the show is due to sexism , and that’s possibly very much the case still
But comparing the role Sarah assigned Jade to the other ghosts, it really makes no sense that Jade was made to play the femme fatale
Dolph and Bullfrog were given jobs that they already do on the regular (Dolph stealing an item using his cyborg tech and Bullfrog sneaking into the building) and while Cody was (presumably) meant to be the one wrestling, Pey’J has the strength and body build to fill in Cody’s absent despite his lack of skills and experience in wrestling
Jade though? She clearly has no clue how to be a seductive temptress, and Sarah must have checked over the ghosts’ profile. Meaning she seen Jade’s profile and seen what she’s actually capable off
Unless Sarah didn’t actually want Jade to do her job
You know what else is common in hero stories? Damsels in distress
I think much like what she did for Dolph in episode three, Sarah’s plan in episode two was to rescue Jade. That obviously did not happen , but my point stands Jade was made a femme fatale so that Sarah can boost her own ego
It’s been brought up on Reddit that Jade’s hair (especially when styled by Sarah in the femme fatale look) resembles Sam’s hair
The two also have green eyes, and wears a hat that casts a shadow over those eyes
We could go a shippy route with this, but this post is already extremely long and I think there’s more interesting things we take from this than Sarah’s weird sexual fantasies
Whether it’s a subconscious thing or something Sarah is fully aware of, Jade reminded Sarah of her father
or rather , how Sarah views her father
I’ve talked a lot about Jade already over here but the point I want to bring to this is that Jade is a passive character in this show. Sam in contrast is not a passive character, but it’s likely Sarah wishes he was
I don’t think Sarah was ever intentionally ableist towards Sam , but combined with her having power over him which makes her feel responsible for his well being from a young age and her believing in the Templar belief that control is the path to keeping everyone safe, I do think Sarah doesn’t respect Sam as a capable adult, especially his life choices that lead to him taking part and dying in the wasteland war
I don’t know what this really means for either Sam or Jade as characters or if these similarities will play a part in season two. What I do know is that this shows Sarah isn’t above trying to mold people to her liking
Which brings me the final two parts of the hero’s journey
Transformation: Sarah becomes a cyborg Templar
”The Ship of Theseus is a thought experiment about whether an object is the same object after having had all of its original components replaced”
Since almost Sarah’s entire body is fully robotic , is it still Sarah’s body, or Eden’s property?
On the off chance that Sarah's brain is also robotic, is the things going through her head Sarah’s thoughts , or Eden’s programming?
Is Sarah even Sarah anymore?
Throughout this whole post I’ve spoke about Sarah , her hero complex and what may have influenced her behaviour. I don’t think Sarah came out of her transition into a cyborg member of the Templar order unscathed
While the ground work for Sarah’s hero complex were present, Sarah was once an innocent little girl who deeply loved her father. Sarah was not born into this world with an ego , she wasn’t born with an intense desire to control other people
Sarah wasn’t born with blood lust in her smile
It was not just Sam who died that day in the wasteland, Sarah’s humanity and connection to other people died with him
There’s something odd about the fact Sarah is the only member of the board of directors who is a cyborg , we know this because Ramon killed the rest way too easily. We also know from Ramon , that people who make it to the top don’t stay at the top
Much like Phos in HNK, Sarah is very much a victim of drastic change due to her own choices and circumstances beyond her control
and finally
Atonement and return: ???
I don’t really have anything to add to this part , mainly because Sarah’s story isn't finished yet
We’ll have to see how things play out in season two it seems : )
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why i would be the avatar of the following entities
post heavily inspired by the wonderful mutual who is @cult-of-the-eye ❤️ i missed the entities who i couldn't figure out what my connection to would be. the list is in alphabetical order for organisation. a few heavy topics ahead? but i try not to get too detailed with it. post is basically my connection to the fear entities and correlating my life experiences with them.
one. the corruption : i kid you not, if i was actually an avatar, this is who i would be. without a single doubt. let's see, not to going to get too in depth, but my best friend died of dengue a while back ya da ya da ya da after she died, i fell in love with her. disease. love. fucked up stuff. you get it.
two. the desolation : there was a fire they would burn outside my old school, to burn garbage and all of that. after a particularly difficult day at school, i would always walk over there and sit myself near the fire, just stare at it. sometimes i would burn little things like paper when i was feeling very angry. that pit of fire was a friend and i had liked to watch it burn. also self-destructive behaviour.
three. the end : refer to the corruption bits. my best friend's fate would tie into the end for me. also, my most major fear, ever since i knew about the concept of having a fear, was the fear of losing loved ones. so.
four. the extinction : okay, so last year, i believe, a thing happened in my city in bangladesh. for a night, the power of the entire city shut down. no electricity in any household, the generator was shut off, not even cellular data was working. so i am talking, no lights, no internet, not even a way to call by phone. load shedding, we had to use candles. it was a weekday night too, streetlights weren't working properly and there was no way for my father to contact us to tell us that he was safe. my mother thought that the prime minister had left the country for us to suffer. pure chaos. basic technology would not work, ovens and refrigerators needed an electrical connection obv and phones were useless. i was talking about this event and the post with my sister the other day and she suggested to add this to the dark, because no light but i feel like it fits the extinction way better for reasons i cannot formulate.
five. the eye : quiet, perceptive friend who just looks odd. you know the type, that was me. i was obsessed with gathering knowledge, i had a random fun fact for every subject. i prided myself with knowing a little about everything. furthermore, i have got this uncanny ability to just Know people's secrets?? okay suppose, my friend has a secret and she's hiding something from everyone. like it's a totally small thing, she likes someone but she doesn't want anyone to know. chances are, i will know. whether it's by observing their body language or thinking it over or just lucky guess, i will know. and the thing is, i will pretend not to know too. girl decided to tell us about that crush i will act shocked like everyone else, for no reason and then i'll go up to them in private and be like, "hey, i knew it. i guessed it last week."
i don't have anything for the meat related fears (fortunately?)
six. the lonely : *puts on a presentation on why i should be a lonely avatar and goes to the first slide* your boy has Social Anxiety. but in all seriousness, isolation, loneliness, it's all second nature to me. i get bothered when people are with me and even then, it feels like they are not? like people will be talking near me and it would feel like i am not even part of their world like. it's like watching a video of people talking like i am not involved in that, even though they are right next to me. they will try to include me in their conversation maybe, but that's not where i am? how can we exist in the same plane?
seven. the spiral : this is a fun one ! most mutuals probably already know this because i talk about it so so darn often but irl, most people actually call me the idiot ! all of my friends from bangladesh, almost every classmate calls me the idiot, to the point where i actually rarely used to hear me real (albeit dead) name spoken out loud. this kind of ties into the "there is no such thing as a real name" thing. also sometimes, late in the night, i will see and remember things and wake up the next day to find that it never happened ever. once, i was talking to my mother and i mentioned her like going to a hostel because she told me stories of how she attended a hostel in eighth grade and she starred at me. she told me that she had never attended a hostel and i was like, yes?? you did?? you always told me about jt?? and she was genuinely scared.
eight. the vast: talked about this once before but once, i was listening to the magnus archives three in the morning, it was one of the space episodes. got scared and suddenly, i had that urge to look out the window and i saw stars. in a light pollution world, where seeing the moon is uncommon, i see five or six stars. still to this day, do not know if i was imagining things.
that is it for all the spooky happenings that are happening.
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End of Scene
Cw: DARKFIC, DUB-CON/NON-CON, murder, death, blood and gore, sadism, Dark!reader, dark!Ghost, stabbing, stalking, Ghostface!reader, home invasion,
Part 4
Slinking from shadow to shadow, you stalked the backdrop of a familiar house, eyes wandering over it’s baby blue walls and curtainless, wide windows, showing the world their private life. Every argument, every fit and every smile were on show, none hidden from prying eyes or dangerous attention. It was practically calling your name, asking - no - it was begging you to do something about it, to give this obnoxious and arrogant neighbourhood something to fear and watch out for. It was waiting for someone to humble this so-called “safest neighbourhood in the world”, no security camera and no patrolling police. It was just taunting you, especially when you hated the owner of this house.
Abigail; sweet, sweet Abigail was tonight’s squealing pig. She was so whiny, always complaining about how her life was so hard when she lived off her parent’s money, in the richest part of the city and could afford whatever she wanted. She was a spoiled brat, spoiled rotten to the core from what you’d come to learn through a long month of observation. You didn’t liked brats, much less spoiled ones, Simon taught you to hate them, he whispered to you at night about how he would beat them to a pulp. You learned to learned to put them in their place.
And she was so easy —too easy. She followed the same routine, her nights spent drinking until all she could do was waddle to her bed, trying and sometimes failing to reach her bed and just laying on her floor. Abigail was at her weakest in a drunken stupor, bumbling and stammering as she spoke when you called, watching as your raspy voice confused her, but the best moment was meeting her in the morning, her paranoid glances around her and awkward gait from her pounding hangover. While she was fun to spook, you were growing tired of watching the same thing over and over again, she wasn’t what you were looking for anymore and soon, you’d have to move on, find another obsession. It was time to end this story.
You crouched outside her window, licking your lips in anticipation, you waited for her to stumble into the kitchen, searching for her new bottle of aged wine that you caught her buy for over two hundred. Seeing you moment, you crawled through the open window that she always left open for better air circulation, stalking past the kitchen entrance and hiding away in her closet. You had to bite your tongue to keep your excited giggle from slipping, enjoying her ambling through the small gap in the door, she placed her wine glass and bottle, and ungracefully dropped down on her couch, hissing about her back pain.
You stared with bated breath, gazing at her while she took sip after sip, throwing herself deeper in the ground with how fast the alcohol was getting to her head. You huffed, pushing open the closet door without a sound and sliding behind her. She was too drunk to be aware of her immediate surrounding, a sloppy and annoying person that you were about to… bring to the limelight with your art. Knife in hand, you swiped at her neck with your free hand, gripping her throat to pull her back, throwing her to the ground with little care while she wailed and begged.
“Please! Please! What do you want?! I’ll give you anything! Anything!!”
You straddled the back of her thighs, ignoring her tearful screams in favour of admiring her helpless figure, too weak to fight you off and too drunk to do anything.
“Anything I want, yeah?” You cackled, watching her nod and gurgle out weeps, “I want your life then.”
Raising your knife, a clean and well-kept buck knife that Simon got you, you took a shuddering breath, scenting her terror before you swung down, sinking it deep into her back. You appreciated her choked scream and the wet squelch of your stab, blood pooled from her wound when you pulled out, spraying you in red when you stabbed her once more. You killed with passion, a final act of acknowledgment to a person you grew to know, an integral part of your stories. You sunk your knife into her again, and again, and again, flicking blood all over you and around you, staining the furniture and walls with flakes of red and the cashmere carpet of hers with a pool of blood.
You listened to her choke on her blood, her chin painted a bright red and eyes blinking slowly, you sat back on your haunches, head lolling back with a heavy, but satisfied sigh. Slowly reaching into your jacket, you pulled out your camera and switched it on, quickly admiring the previous pictures you took with prior actors. Sliding the knife back into it’s sheath, you kneeled forward, gloved hand harshly grasping at the roots of her bleached hair and propped her up for a selfie, her body still warm under you and mouth dripping blood. Smiling behind the mask, you took a few pictures, the shutter clicking loudly in your ears with the bright and blinding flash of the lights, and dropped Abigail, her head slamming roughly with a wet splash on the carpet.
You flipped through the shots, admiring your bloody work with a proud hum, unbothered by her dying rasp and last wheeze. You secured your camera in the pocket you sewed in your jacket and stared at your piggy one last time before you’d leave the closing scene of your story to reporters and authorities to write and critique. You hummed a small lullaby, looking over the dirtied walls and smeared floor, you turned to the window you crawled in from. Then your phone shook, vibrating in your coat, and in a moment of curiosity, too happy to be mad that you were interrupted in your moment you looked at the caller name. It was Simon!
“Hi, Si,” you grinned, a higher pitch in your tone despite the modulator’s incapability of catching it.
“ ‘ello, kit,” his reply was slow, lazy in a way, unlike your giddy one, “Where are you?”
You looked around the room and open hallway, it’d be useless to lie to him when you answered him with the voice changer on, and lying to him would disappoint him. You hated disappointing Simon, how that small, but warm gleam in his eyes would turn cold and blank, showing how much he was displeased with your acts and decision.
“Abigail’s, just finished.”
You caught a proud rumble - more so a growl - from his side and clothes shifting as he moved from, what you presumed, his bed.
“At piggy’s? Sloppy, kit, what if there are cameras?”
You laughed, a loud, boisterous and belly chuckle.
“You know me, Si. You didn’t teach me to be sloppy, I know what I’m doing.”
“Good, do me proud and I’ll fuck you good when ’m home, yeah?”
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NEW TUMBLR UPDATE:
You can only like 4 posts a day and if you even think of reblogging we're going to blow your brains out
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