.

I was thinking and you know, I’m really amazed with myself and need to give myself more credit for not slipping back into cutting myself in 2020. Like I was in my worst case scenario, trapped with my family and unable to see anyone else or go anywhere else, no respite, no hope and yet I still manged to take care of myself for the most part.

I got through it without cutting and without alcohol and teenage me would never ever believe it. I barely believe it. I’m absolutely amazed. There was a time years ago when I would I cut myself everyday, multiple times a day, pretty much living off of sleeping pills, caffeine and self hatred and yet I ended up getting through the thing I swore I could never handle without those things. I think I only I used a sleep aid twice that whole year?

I’m speechless. I’m so proud of myself. I can hardly believe it.

Me: Omg I love watch_dogs its SO fun!!! I adore Aiden Pearce!!! The story is so so cool!!!

Also me: *Actually crying, heart pounding, sweaty, screaming in frustration, and hitting myself with the controller after dying for the 17th time on a car chase mission*

Oh Jack hits himself to punish himself…..relatable…..I love Jack…..I am Jack

The problem with social media exaggeration is I feel like I’m exaggerating when I explain how my anxiety feels. Like, I feel like I want to eat the skin off my arms, sort of anxiety. Sounds like I’m making a haha joke but like, it really is THAT bad

Anyway, I love exaggeration and hate anxiety, so I’m just….vibin’

Hey y'all, I’ve been feeling a bit better. I’m hoping to be clean from cvtting when I start school again.

However school seems like it’s gonna mess me up and stress me out, any tips on how to cope with that?

so sick of it all

I’ll be 2 years clean from self harm on March 19th. weird.

Okay so like. I haven’t read any fazbear frights books bc I’m broke and i mainly rely on dawko and reddit for reviews, summaries, and book quotes/parts etc but the way dawko talks about certain characters bothers me??? Like idk if i can explain why? So I’m sorry if this all seems nonsensical

But like basically how he talks about characters that struggle with understanding social cues? Dismissive and like he always just calls them creeps?

Or like when he mentioned the protag of hide and seek and mentioned finding the characters behaviour funny? Like??? The protag was literally harming himself to get rid of the shadow bonnie that got stitched to his back that only he could see. That’s????? Not funny at all??? Like he basically was like “hahahah only he sees shadow bonnie and does all of these harmful things to make it disappear but it doesn’t. The protag is so stupid” which. Hm.

Or like how he calls characters that made certain decisions stupid? Like bro what did you except? That they would just get over their trauma the second they got away without seeing anyone for it? Like idk dude the way he dismisses behaviours, emotions, etc seems toxic and on some parts ableist. Like yeah the books never confirm the characters being neurodivergent or mentally ill but there seem to be lots of hints to that and the fact that those “symptoms” seem to be the things he comments on the most? I feel like calling it ableist would be right?

Not just this though, he has played ableist games in which the antagonists are mentally ill or neurodivergent. (In one of them the antagonist was just one mix of all cluster b personality disorders and it was so gross, couldn’t even watch the playthrough bc i had a hunch it would happen and checked the wiki. I was right. So i just closed the tab)

Okay so there was no trigger warning on that ask so Im gonna sc and respond to it under a cut, hope you dont mind @seomisaho

Tw Self Harm Mention below cut

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Was tagged by: @captain-aralias​

nickname: Ollie or Lollie or Lollipop

zodiac: Cancer

height: 5′6″

countries I’ve been to: US, that’s it

last thing I googled: types of tea. We have to create a database for one of my classes, and my group is doing it on tea

song stuck in my head: Driver’s License by Olivia Rodrigo​

wearing: black skinny jeans from Hot Topic, a black long-sleeved shirt, and combat boots

favorite author: I’m not sure if I have one right now

favorite instrument: piano

aesthetic: I don’t even know anymore lol

Home aesthetic: idk this either; how do I describe an aesthetic??

favorite song: right now, it’s Driver’s License

favorite animal sounds: the chattering of squirrels

what’s one thing you’ll admit to tumblr and not in real life? I used to be suicidal. My long hidden secret I can’t tell anyone about. A couple of people knew I was self-harming, but I never told them more than that.

tagging: @simon–spooks @wo2ash @peculiarkidddd @dreamingkc @carryonsimoncarryonbaz @palimpsessed and anyone else who wants to do this :)

Tw /// very heavy themes of depression and mentions of s/h.

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i am actually going to gnaw off my own arm /dramatic /nsrs

(vent in the tags so-)

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Characters: Regressor!Katsuki Bakugou (aka. Kacchan), worried!Izuku Midoriya (aka. Deku), worried!Shouta Aizawa (aka. Sensei), caregiver!Eijiro Kirishima, and the rest of 1A as background characters

Words: 4,000

Summary: Izuku notices Kacchan regressing in class and makes the mistake of following him when he leaves, intending to try and help. 

Content warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence. Dissociation. Trauma. Bullying. Prevented (unintentional) self-harm. Self-neglect. Physical abuse. Verbal abuse. Mild burns. Blood. This fanfiction raises many questions and issues and doesn’t necessarily solve all of them, although everyone receives physical care by the end. 

Author’s Note: Please note the content warnings and exercise caution when reading. I just finished the third season of My Hero Academia, and I have many emotions about the way the relationship between Katsuki and Izuku is handled by both the writers and the characters in the show. I’m also aware that their dynamic is a popular one in the fandom, and thus something I might be asked to write when I open requests again. This story was my attempt at figuring out how I felt about that. (Conclusion: I’m willing to write regressor!Katsuki with other caregivers, but not with Izuku, and vice-versa. I promise my regressor!Katsuki fics will not all be this angsty. I just had to get this one out of my system.) 

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Patton would see someone’s very obvious self harm scars and ask what they’re from and then continue asking even when the person become visibly uncomfortable and asks him to stop

Of course *gives you a big soft hug*

𝕱 𝖎 𝖗 𝖘 𝖙       𝕴 𝖒 𝖕 𝖗 𝖊 𝖘 𝖘 𝖎 𝖔 𝖓 𝖘

+         one  thousand  pairs  of  eyes  everyday ,      some  familiar ,        most  estranged .        careful  not to  cross  optics ,        sights  focused  on  the   grime       &       ash   that  the  concrete  skin  of  the  city  collects .        he’ll  be  caught  skulking  corners  of  collected  buildings ,        navigating  himself  to  the  easiest  pack  of  cigarettes  available  before  the  beginning  of  what’ll  be  too  long  of  a  night  shift .       he’s  hesitant  to  fuss ,       however          ;        enamored  with   any       &       all    𝖊𝖝𝖙𝖊𝖓𝖘𝖎𝖛𝖊  𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖗𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘 .

+        it’s  when  the  sun  rises ,        &        caspar’s  neglected  memories  are  grasping  for  any  oxygen  their  hands  can  reach   ;   blood - thirsty  intrusions .        pale ,        delicate        &        guilty  skeletal  fingers  frantically  finding  safety  in  another  cigarette         &         chrome  heirloom  zippo .        cruelly   `easing`    mind        &        body ,        subjecting  mind  to  vices        &        𝖇𝖔𝖉𝖞  to  the  𝖘𝖔𝖋𝖙  𝖒𝖚𝖙𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓  the  flame  can  fulfill .        left  hand  left  covered  in  ash ,        residual  pain  not  dissimilar  to  the  sting  of  flossing  too  hard  you  wince ,        &         just   cannot  help  to  not  do  it  again .

𝕬 𝖕 𝖕 𝖊 𝖆 𝖗 𝖆 𝖓 𝖈 𝖊

+          muted ,         dull  colors  thread  themselves  into  metallic  fabric         &          latex .          uncomfortably  tight  clothes  always  preferable ,          satisfaction  found  in  the  provided  containment .          a  clear  plastic  trench  -  style  coat  drapes  atop  a  black  tank  top  tucked  into  red  fabricated  leather  jeans .          his  job  has  shaped  his  wardrobe  into  abrasive  but  beautiful  clothing          ;          never  colorful .          always  glistening .

+          black  metal  chains  drip  softly  down  his  neck           &           wrists          ;          juxtaposing  their  brutalist  design  in  nature .          nails  painted  to  match ,          definitely  chipped .          obsidian  studs  in  pierced  ears ,          often  spinning  them  with  whatever  unoccupied  digits  decide  wander  off .          get  close  enough  to  smell  him ,          you’re lucky  to  catch  notes  of  fruity  body  oil          &          musk  -  based  cologne          ―          if  the  cloak  of  smoke  hadn’t  been  freshly  𝖗𝖊𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖗𝖔𝖉𝖚𝖈𝖊𝖉 .          tongue  stinging  with  cinnamon  gum           &          tobacco .

ITS BEEN 2 ½ MONTHS, MY DUDES. IVE BEEN CLEAN FOR 2 ½ MONTHS!!! 

I used to talk to the Trevor Project s//lf h//rm prevention and su//cide prevention hotlines a lot so Ranboo doing this makes me feel extremely extremely happy

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