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bisexual-cryptid · 1 year

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tw: issues surrounding consent (not between steve and eddie)

steve has never really been asked if he wants something when it came to sex. it was always just assumed he was into it. whether it was with various girls he hooked up with or the occasional guy, no one ever bothered to ask if what they were doing was alright.

steve never thought anything about it, just assuming that was normal. of course he would always ask first but he thought that was how it goes. he asks, others don’t. after all why would they? no one ever asked steve what he likes or wants outside of sex- so why would they ask during sex? it just made sense to him, so that’s how it went.

and then he met eddie. sweet sweet wonderful eddie, who always asks before touching him even if it’s non-sexual. it started off before they even got together. eddie would always ask or make sure steve had enough time to move away before touching him. even if it was something as small as putting a hand on his shoulder. it throws steve for a loop everytime he does it. he doesn’t understand why eddie is so gentle with him.

steve finally says something about it around a month into their relationship. they’re laying in eddie’s bed, eddie on top of steve, the two of them kissing. eddie’s hands are trailing down steve’s torso, stopping right before they get to his waistband. steve whines, bucking his hips up, trying to get him to hurry up. eddie pulls away from steve’s mouth, panting slightly as he tries to catch his breath.

“is this okay?” eddie asks, words so soft and gentle it kinda makes steve want to scream.

“why do you do that?” steve can’t help but ask, his curiosity finally getting the best of him. eddie’s brows furrow in confusion, as he continues to look down at steve.

“do what?” eddie asks, genuinely confused.

“why do you always ask before touching me?” steve asks as if it’s the most confusing thing in the world, and to him it is. he can’t think of a single reason why eddie finds the need to ask before touching him. especially since they’ve been together for awhile now. in his past relationships his significant others would just assume it was okay at this stage so he doesn’t understand why eddie doesn’t do the same.

a look of sadness crosses eddie’s features before he quickly schools his face into one of neutrality. he brings both his hands up, cupping steve’s cheeks like he is the most precious thing in the world. he strokes his thumbs in soothing circles while he continues to look at steve, seemingly contemplating something.

“why wouldn’t i? do you not ask before touching someone?” eddie asks, phrasing his questions carefully.

“of course i do, but i just don’t understand why you do it to me. no one ever asks me.” steve scoffs as if it should be obvious. eddie’s face morphs into one of shock and hurt. he always has worn his heart on his sleeve and even when he tries to mask his emotions, steve sees right through it.

“baby-“ eddie chokes out, sounding heart broken. steve quickly backtracks, thinking that he must have done something wrong.

“no, no, i’m sorry eddie. i never should have asked. i’m sorry i upset you, please don’t be mad at me,” steve all but begs, shrinking in on himself as best he can with eddie still looming above him.

“shhh, no baby, i’m not mad i promise.” eddie says, but steve doesn’t believe him. he can see the rage barely hidden behind his eyes.

“yes you are, i’m sorry eddie, please,” steve chokes out, tears starting to well in his eyes. eddie grips his face a little harder, dipping down to force steve to make eye contact with him.

“hey, listen to me. i’m not mad, not at you. i’m furious at every single person who has ever laid their hands on you without asking, but i’m not mad at you. never at you.” eddie replies. steve’s eyes search eddie’s face looking for a lie but he doesn’t find one.

“why?” steve chokes out, unable to stop the tears from slowly falling down his cheeks. eddie quickly wipes them away with his thumbs, stroking at his cheeks with a softness steve has never felt before.

“do i deserve to be asked before someone touches me?” eddie asks, making steve’s head spin with confusion.

“wh- yes of course you do.”

“then so do you, baby.”

steve feels even more confused at eddie’s statement. it feels like an entirely different conversation to him, he doesn’t understand what eddie means.

“but- i mean- that’s not- it’s not the same.” steve argues, feeling like his entire world is tipping upside down.

“of course it is, why wouldn’t it be?” eddie asks, his words patient and understanding.

“because- because you’re you. you’re perfect and beautiful and you deserve everything and i’m- im just me.” steve replies.

“stevie, my love. do you really not have any idea how fucking perfect you are? you are like the definition of perfect. you are the kindest, bravest, smartest, hottest piece of ass i have ever had the privilege of getting to know.” eddie says, making steve let out a watery laugh.

“you might not believe it now, but i swear to you steve harrington i will make you understand how incredible you are if it’s the last thing i do. now, can i kiss you, my love?”

instead of answering steve surges up, bringing eddie into a passionate, watery kiss. it’s a little salty with tears but neither of them care, needing to be connected right now.

steve still might not fully understand why eddie is so kind to him, and he might not believe that he is incredible like eddie says, but with the love of his life by his side he thinks he can maybe start to believe it one day. especially if eddie keeps kissing him like this.

#tw consent issues #stranger things #st4 #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie #steveddie #steve x eddie #ficlet #drabble #headcanons #headcanon #fanfiction

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imagineredwood · 2 months

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7. Macarons 🍪

Summary: Manny likes you, has for a while, but he's gotten mixed signals from you and isn't sure if the feeling is mutual. That's ok though. Nothing a few laced cookies can't solve.

Pairing: Manny x female reader (did he have a last name? Can’t remember)

Warnings: 18+ MDNI Sexual content, they do not have sex, just grinding and touching, Dark!Manny DRUGGING - the reader is drugged without her consent with a 'truth serum' type drug in her gifted macarons to get her to tell him how she feels. The reader does like him and does want to be with him/be sexual with him, she's just been shy and didn't dare to be upfront; the drug helps it come out. So their interactions are technically consensual, but she has been drugged against her will/knowledge and is under the influence. Just want to make that clear for everyone. If it's not your cup of tea or triggers you or anything like that, please don't read it. I would never want anyone to be upset by/hurt/triggered by my work, but at the same time, we're also responsible for the content that we choose to consume. So if it doesn't sound like something you would like or enjoy reading, please don't read it. I won't take it personally if you sit this one out. Also please let me know what other tw I should tag it as if there are any you feel it should be under

Word count: 1.6K

"Macarons??"

You beamed as you looked into the box, the selection of pastel treats looking delightful. They were expensive for their size, one of the main reasons you never really splurged on them. You'd had one or two here and there, but a box of 24? You had never spent that kind of money on a cookie. That didn't mean that you couldn't admire them though. You'd saved some aesthetic tiktoks of them, opting to one day spoil yourself with a beautiful box of them. You hadn't ever told Manny about your desire to have them, knowing that if you merely mentioned it, he would've splurged on the most beautiful and expensive ones he could find. He was just like that when it came to you. So you'd kept it to yourself, deciding that you would get yourself a small box for Valentine's Day, seeing as you didn't have a Valentine.

But Manny had beat you to the punch.

He grinned as he watched your eyes light up, happy that his gift had paid off. At first, a few months ago when he was trying to plan out what he would do for the special day, he wasn't sure if the treat was one you would be into. He wanted to make sure that whatever treat he got you for Valentine's Day, was one you would enjoy and preferably one you would remember.

When he saw the saved tiktoks, he was thankful that he'd had the idea to hack your phone a few weeks before.

His intentions had been innocent enough, really. He just wanted to be able to know what you liked. He always got you gifts, eager to please. He had already decided he was going to put together a Valentine's Day basket for you, but he needed to make sure everything was perfect and to your liking. He needed you to see how much he cared about you and wanted you to be happy. Wanted you to be his. All of his previous gifts had warmed you and gotten you closer to him, but you still weren't his. His hope was that this gift would change that.

So scrolling through your likes and saves, he'd found a handful of videos of the delicate treat and knew then that was his way into your heart. And right he had been.

You smiled eyes raking over all of the colors, the sweet aroma wafting up to your nose in a swirl of vanilla and raspberry and cinnamon and-

"I'm glad you like it."

The Mayan looked proud as he eyed you, happy with his decision. Your mouth was practically watering at the smell and he knew you couldn't wait to try them.

"Go 'head, mama. Let me know how they taste."

Your fingers hovered around the box, all of them looking so good you were having trouble picking which one you wanted. You settled on a baby pink one and picked it up, admiring it.

"This one looks just like one I saw a video of."

Manny nodded, knowing the exact tiktok you were speaking of. He didn't say that though. He knew that was the one you were going to have picked first. He knew you'd be excited and enthusiastic to dig into them.

That was why he had paid to have a little something slipped into the filling.

He wasn't going to hurt you, of course not, he would never do that. He just wanted you soft and compliant. Honest. Needed to know if you felt the same way. Needed to know how you felt about him wanting you to be his and only his. So he'd gotten the idea from one of his brothers, 'truth serum cookies' he'd called it. The company made desserts for different purposes. Some had aphrodisiacs for couples to ramp up their sex life, others like the ones he had ordered had a drug known to make people relaxed and forthcoming, perfect for those who struggled with shyness when it came to dirty talk.

In Manny's case, he just wanted you to be relaxed and open enough to tell the truth about if you wanted him as much as he wanted you. He needed to know if you would be his, and if you didn't want to be, then why. He'd brought it up to one of the Yuma brothers and he'd sold him on the idea. 'She won't even know. You can't taste it, no one would buy them if they tasted weird. They crush it up and mix it with some sugar, then add it to the cookie's filling. She won't have a clue. And you'll get to figure out whether she wants to have your crazy ass or not.' he had said.

He watched as you brought the macaron to your mouth and took a bite, catching a crumb in your hand as you licked the rest from your lips. Manny licked his own instinctively, eyes raking over your face as he watched you eat, almost in a trance. You smiled, covering your mouth as you chewed, not wanting to make more of a mess.

"It's delicious."

He smiled, then shook his head as you held it up to him for him to take a bite.

"Not a fan of raspberry. Enjoy it."

He lied cooly, and you bought it, taking another bite. You pushed the box towards him and motioned for him to take one as you both stood there at your kitchen counter. He obliged, not wanting you to suspect anything, and grabbed the cream-colored one with light brown filling, taking a bite.

"Cinnamon."

"Mmm."

He held it out for you to take a bite of your own and you did, enjoying that one just as much as the other. You both stood there together, eating and chatting, a whole row missing before you knew it. You'd eaten most of them, and he wasn't worried about being affected. He didn't have anything to hide. You let out a yawn, and grabbed the lid, covering up the box with a laugh.

"The crash after a sugar rush always sucks."

Manny nodded, his eyes on you as he watched your eyes grow a little heavier, your lids moving a little slower as you blinked.

"Maybe we could go chill on the couch."

You nodded and offered him a relaxed smile, that idea sounding wonderful.

"Yeah, that sounds good."

He followed you as you walked, hands itching to grab your hips as they swayed in front of him. You were a goddess in his eyes. A treasure that was meant to be his, but was always just out of his reach. But he was also a gentleman, despite his unorthodox methods of gaining the truth. So he kept his hands to himself, sitting down beside you on the couch. He angled his body towards you slightly like he always did, except this time it was because he was keeping an eye on you.

Your eyes were soft, your face smooth and relaxed. He looked you over, not worried about you thinking he was weird or creepy for how long he stared at your face. He took in the angle of your nose, how your lashes fluttered on the tops of your cheeks. The softness of your lips. Your voice was gentle when it spoke, and his eyes were watching your lips as they parted, but it still caught him off guard.

"Do you think I'm pretty, Manny?"

There it was. The serum already going into effect. His eyes drifted away from your lips and locked with yours.

"I do, mama. I think you're gorgeous."

You smiled softly.

"I hoped you did."

He inquired even though he knew exactly what you meant.

"Hoped I did what?"

You shrugged, head tilted to the side as you gazed at him.

"Hoped you found me pretty."

He swallowed, his fingers wiggling as they screamed to touch you.

"Well, I do. I think you're the prettiest little thing I've ever fuckin' seen."

He watched as your throat moved, your swallow audible and pulling a smile from him.

"What about you? You think I'm handsome?"

You didn't hesitate to nod.

"I think you're very handsome. I think you're sexy."

He adjusted himself in his seat, pants starting to feel a little snug.

"That so?"

"Mhmm."

You stared at him, fingers twiddling with the hem of your shirt.

"I wanna sit in your lap. If that's ok."

He melted, his nod sharp as he lifted the arm that was toward you, inviting you in.

"C'mon then."

He felt his pulse quicken as you crawled over, a hand on his shoulder to steady yourself as you tossed your leg over his and then settled down in his lap, his eyes peering up at you. Your hands rested on his chest, fingers reaching up slightly, the tips tracing over the tattoo on his throat.

"Wanted to sit like this for a while."

The Mayan allowed his hands to finally drift over onto your hips, fingers digging in ever so slightly into the plush skin.

"Wanted you to sit like this for a while too."

Your giggle was breathless and it took everything in him not to start dragging your hips back and forth on him.

"Anything else you been wanting?"

You looked at him, fingers still stroking the ink.

"Been wanting you to touch me."

Manny groaned, his hands gripping you tighter.

"Oh yeah? Where?"

You shrugged and he shook his head, sucking his teeth.

"Nah, none of that. Where you want my hands at, pretty girl?"

He slid his hands down further, fingers digging into the flesh of your ass, gripping and pulling at your cheeks.

"Here?"

You nodded, your hips rocking slightly. You pulled one hand away from his throat and instead gripped your own breast, your nipple hard under your palm already.

"Maybe here too."

He cursed quietly under his breath and pulled only one hand away to replace yours, squeezing at the soft swell of your breast, feeling like he was in heaven.

"Yes ma'am."

General taglist

@piccasoe @ateliefloresdaprimavera @gemini0410 @woahitslucyylu @my-rosegold-soul @that-chick212 @everyhowlmarksthedead @glimmerglittergirl @fanaticfangurl21 @encounterthepast @svintsandghosts @starrynite7114 @destynelseclipsa @queenbeered @iamthegraham @emoengelfurleben @otomefromtheheart @rosieposie0624 @papa-geralt-of-cirilla @beeroses @weirdosandhopelessromantics @kola95 @black-repunzel99 @xonickibaby @cruzwalters @myakai13 @mrsstevenbuchananstark @lyly00 @kaystacks17 @cole-winchester @alexxavicry @savagemickey03 @fanfic-n-tabulous @gangstaliciou06

Mayans MC taglist

@dazzledamazon @abunnykisses @briana-mishell24 @wrcn9fvlcver @thesandbeneathmytoes @krysiewithak @appropriate-writers-name @blessedboo @megapeacelovemusic-blog @emoengelfurleben @blowmymbackout @abby-splace @kola95 @black-repunzel99 @redpoodlern @myakai13

@cruzwalters @danimals1096 @po3ticb3auty @lyly00 @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @angel-121 @fanfic-n-tabulous @90sisthenew80s @lovelytricia @librarian1002

#imagines #mayans mc #mayans imagine #valentines day drabble event #manny mayans mc #manny x reader #tw drugs #tw consent issues #manny montana #yandere

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nobodymitskigabriel · 5 months

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Something about the way Sam's face changes when he realizes that Gadreel is not Dean. I'm gonna be sick.

#supernatural #sam winchester #gadreel #tw consent issues #spn 7x01

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ambriolette · 1 month

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TW: Kinda consensual non consensual and cussing. Another request, some GuitarPrincess or Chadam? We can’t decide on Twitter, but what a forbidden pair.

Hear me out: What if, Charlie made a deal with Adam during that meeting; that at the date of the usual extermination, he gets to do whatever he wants with her the entire day instead? (no matter what) And then, he gets addicted and starts shortening the dates and Charlie is in limbo with the responsibility of this duty to save her people and the conflict of her own interests? That’s what I’m gonna be thinking while drawing more of this pairing. 🧍‍♀️The full drawings on Twitter cause tumblr no like mature things.

#charlie morningstar #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin ships #tw consent issues #hazbin hotel #fanfic ideas

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bamsara · 2 years

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when you gotta act normal but in reality you Do Not Want To Be Around Them

#man i used to think some people were so cool #apologized to or not some things just make you lose trust and respect for some folks and even scared of them #and i just get guilt tripped #please dont use people as your therapist without consent or trauma dump when you are confronted with an issue #sara shush #tw vent

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suncaptor · 9 months

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Meg starting to sexually assault Sam by kissing his neck and then later possessing him and taking control of his body by force 🤝 Sam kissing Lucifer's neck when they first interact but only because he thinks it's a dream of his dead girlfriend before Sam does say yes to Lucifer taking control of his body

#HHHHHHHH #s.a #tw noncon kissing #tw consent issues #spn #incoherents #sammy #supernatural #sam winchester #lucifer #meg

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yandere-genji · 2 years

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Helloo, I’ve never requested a fanfic before, or on tumblr so ur my very first I’m excited ^^ ~ could you do a highschool au of like a bully!gabriel x nerd!reader where he becomes frustrated by the reader not reacting or caring about his bullying, so uses “extreme measures” to really grab their attention. non-con or dub-con, and daddy kink, if that’s okay 🤎

ok i hope u don’t mind i took some “creative liberties” with this lovely prompt and also made it college au but yea. this is an S tier request btw anon and you sucked me back into this shit so props to u 🤎 reader is gender neutral ofc (yes princess is a gen neutral term this is the 21st century)

“You’re not funny, Gabe,” you spoke through gritted teeth in an attempt to intimidate your tormentor, “give me my stuff back or else!”

He responded with a hearty chuckle, tossing your school bag into his locker and closing the door with swift kick. He was bouncing with laughter and amusement at your widened eyes, completely entertained by his own antics, “Yea? What the hell are you gonna do, tell your fucking dean? Go right ahead, see where that’ll get you with me.”

You couldn’t help but close your fists in the tightest grip you could muster, your jaw clenched and face burning red. You hated that he was right, not only was your first instinct to tattle on him, but it would get you nowhere. Gabriel Reyes was untouchable. The school’s quarterback with a promising future that would surely put them on the map once he continued with his career. It made you sick that this asshole would only get a slap on the wrist and a stroke to his ego if you asked anyone to do anything about his harassment of you. What could you do, then? There’s no way in hell you’re just going to sit here and take it.

“No, I’m not running to anyone. Trust me when I say this, you’ll regret messing with me!” The threat didn’t come out the way you intended. Your voice fell out with a crack in the midst of your reply, and tears threatened to fall from your wet eyes. You had hoped he might second guess his actions and consider that you might actually fulfill your promise. Instead, it seemed to have the opposite effect on him. It seemed to have egged him on even further.

His smile widened and he pushed you against the wall. You gasped at the impact, you could feel a dull pain on your back. Hopefully it wouldn’t leave a mark. Before you could get out of your dazed state, Gabe caged you in with his arms, looking down at you like a starved wolf, “You’re really gonna make this fun for me, aren’t you?”

“I’m not scared of you,” you whispered, breath unstable and heart pounding in your ears.

Gabe’s smile beamed. He looked like almost perfect, straight and impossibly white teeth. Full lips and sharp jawline with hints of facial hair. His eyes were dark, like a black hole pulling you in the more you looked into them. Keeping his gaze only revealed to you how weak you were under him. Something he must be aware of by the way he was forcing you to look at him.

He knew you found him handsome. You had told him as much the day you had met him. The day he set his sights on you. He had been much nicer to you then. Saying hi to you in the halls, asking if you wanted to sit with him during lunch, and not taking your shit and throwing it in his locker. But you never came around to him when he asked you if you wanted to go out sometime. You didn’t want to go out with anyone, you were far too focused on schoolwork and tutoring on the side. Dating and boyfriends was just something you didn’t have time for. So you had to refuse and be on your way.

Gabe never understood why you rejected him. How could you be too busy for him? You were always studying in the library, or just reading because you enjoyed it, you said. That’s what all this was about? Reading? That’s like asking your professor for more exams. What kind of masochist shit is that? You must’ve been into that considering all the shit you had to put up with from him.

But fuck, he just couldn’t help but taunt you. The way you insisted upon standing up for yourself even though your face read that you were completely terrified, it did something to him that he couldn’t describe. It made him want to break you. Tear you down and finally see you cry, beg him to stop, beg him to be nice. Just completely melt into him. He wanted to see you on your knees, on all fours, face level with his cock and crying for his forgiveness. For his attention. For any sense of mercy he had for you in his heart.

And you did nothing to quell his desires. Always so pompous in your academic achievements like you were to hottest shit in town. Just like when you became president of the debate club, you gloated about it nonstop until Gabe knocked the wind out of your sails. It didn’t piss him off that you were doing well. In fact, a part of him admired you for it. No, it was the fact that you pranced around so proud before him but you weren’t his. You weren’t asking him if you’d made him proud. Weren’t even talking to him about it. He had to hear about it from a friend of his who was into your nerd shit. Pissed him off to no end.

Now you were here. Trembling under him like a fucking pathetic worm. Yet, you still insisted on defying him. Denying him the pleasure of seeing you vulnerable before him. You were a tease through and through and Gabe was intent on getting what belonged to him. You stared up at him with wet eyes for what seemed like forever until the your phone alarm rang, signaling the start of your next class.

“Well, what do you know. Looks like it’s time for this bright little student to get to class,” he pushed himself away from the wall that had bruised your back, turning back to you, “Hope you didn’t need anything in that backpack of yours today, what a shame.”

……..

As turns out, you would need that backpack of yours. In fact, Gabe must’ve been a stalker creep because his timing couldn’t have been any better - or worse, for you. You had to give a presentation for your language comp class and both your laptop and flash drive were in your backpack. Of course you hadn’t factored in the fact Gabe was going to steal your shit. So, for the meantime, you were screwed until you could get it back.

Maybe this was an opportunity for you to reconcile with him, you thought. Sure, he was hot-headed and seemed sadistically interested in making you miserable, but you couldn’t keep going on like this forever. What was his end goal? You hadn’t the faintest clue, truth be told, but maybe if you could just cut the bullshit with him, go right to the brass tacks of it all and lay everything bare on the table, maybe, maybe, maybe the two of you could come to terms with whatever issues you had. You weren’t unreasonable but you had been stubborn with Gabe. You had hoped he was stop acting like a dick or get bored with you, but nothing you had tried with him so far was effective. So screw it. Might as well try to compromise with the guy and hope he could listen to reason.

Your class ended at noon, the busiest time at your school. Everyone was racing out the door and headed for the cafeteria. Among the crowd, you were determined to find Gabe and, most importantly, your school bag.

You had caught him in the hall standing next to his locker, chatting it up with Jack Morrison, class president and all around golden boy. This was your chance, you thought. You eagerly made your way towards them, Gabe noticing you maneuvering in the crowd in an effort to reach him. An effort that already had him grinning from ear to ear as he averted his attention away from Jack. Before you made you way to them, he was already gone. Gabe shooed him away with words you couldn’t make out, and the two of you were standing side by side in the bustling hall.

You stared at each other for a moment, not saying a word. He knew what you wanted, knew you were going to approach him at some point, but the intent on your face was not what he expected. Your brows furrowed, eyes almost pleading. Jaw slightly slack and bottom lip hanging open as if to speak but all that was heard was the crowd of hungry students running through the halls like a parade. It left him speechless, the very sight of you. You were speechless, too, not sure how to approach him without some form of hostility in your voice. But the halls soon cleared and the silence was deafening. You took a breath, trying to start the conversation.

Gabe spoke, interrupting you, “What do you want?”

It had been so long since you heard him speak that way. Still voice, no sign of amusement or taunting. Almost as if he were genuinely curious as to why you were there. But you both knew that wasn’t true. You decided to play along, let him lead.

“I’d like to have my stuff back,” you spoke with your voice as aloof as you could muster, looking at his locker, “I have a presentation next class and I need my laptop.”

He hummed in response, “Well,” he began to play with the lock, twisting it mindlessly any which way, “guess that means you want me to fetch it for you, right?”

You shrugged, “Not necessarily. I could get it myself if you prefer, I just don’t know your combo is all.”

He chuckled. The sound was so jarring to you, your body instinctively flinched. He looked up at you from the lock, meeting your eyes with that same predatory look from earlier. Everything was still for a moment. Then, Gabe straighten his posture and spoke, “You don’t need to know it. It’s not here.”

“Wha-” your eyes squinted in frustrated confusion. You exhaled, trying to keep your composure, “Okay, where is it? Do you think I could get it back before my next class?”

Gabe could tell you were starting to drop whatever act you were playing. It was cute to see you try to keep your cool with him, the muscles on his face were burning with delight, “Sure.”

You crossed your arms and sighed, starting to grow impatient, “So where is it?”

He turned away from you, slowly walking down the hall, “This way,” he whistled at you like a dog while motioning with his two fingers for you to follow him. How insufferable.

But you did. It seemed that your method had some impact on him. This could be the break you had been looking for. You followed him down the corridor, wrapping around the halls with him until he came to a stop in front of the boys’ locker room. He turned towards you, leaning against the wall looking ever so smug.

You mouth fell open and eyes widened a bit. Huffing, you shook your head, “No way.”

“What?” he kept his eyes on you, “Don’t tell me you’re too prissy to go into a locker room.”

“There’s no way I’m going to go in there with you, Gabe!” you raised your voice a bit in frustration. He couldn’t be serious, right?

“Christ, relax, princess. Coach is out for lunch and I swiped his keys earlier,” he shook his pockets which rang with the jiggling of the keys, “Go on in, nothing to be scared of.”

What he was describing had to break some kind of law, but it’s not like he’d really get in trouble anyway. Not everyone can do this kind of shit, but Gabe could. Even worse, he could get away with it even if he was caught. So what option did you have but to walk through the doors into the dank locker room that reeked of sweat. Much to your unease, Gabe followed behind you and locked the door. He raised the keys in his hands, letting you have a good look at them, “Gotta make sure no one sees us, right?”

You shook your head in disapproval, “Where’s my stuff? Or are you just gonna drag me around all day?”

He scoffed, “You got a real attitude problem, you know that?” Gabe grabbed your elbow in a tight grip. You gasped, struggling to escape his grasp, “Calm down, just come with me.”

“You’re hurting me!” You put your hand on his wrist in some attempt to get him off of you, and he thankfully obliged by pushing you away from him.

“Don’t have a high pain tolerance, I take it? All bark and no bite. Didn’t take you for the type with all those empty threats you spill,” he began walking off, “you coming?”

Although Gabe was mean to you, he had never really hurt you before. Not physically. It shook your core a bit, the atmosphere seemed all wrong and the fact he was your only way to escape did nothing but frighten you more.

“Gabe?” you softly called out his name, not wanting to go any further.

He stopped. Your voice cut through him like a knife. You had never spoken to him like that. He could hear the fear in your voice, hear you on the verge of pleading for him. He turned his head, but didn’t dare look you in the eyes, “What?” he spoke sternly, demanding an answer.

You weren’t sure what to say. So many emotions were running through you - mostly fear and confusion. This was something different than a fight or flight response. You couldn’t describe it, you didn’t want to run away or fight back. You just wanted to appeal to whatever sense of reason he had.

“Why don’t you like me?” your voice was weak, a kind of weakness you hadn’t spoken with in a long time. Completely vulnerable, willing to bare everything for just one moment of clarification. Just one reason why things were like this. It was something you were wondering all along, but could never bare to ask. The kind of thing that is sunken in the deepest pit of your subconscious, never baring its head until you’re backed up into a corner just like this.

He turns around slowly, deliberately. The look on his face is almost pitiful, but not authentic. He’s taunting you with a false vulnerability. Now you’ve done it. You’ve completely unraveled before him. He didn’t know this could be so easy. The two of you had been chasing each other in circles for the better part of half a year and it’s finally come to this. There was no farce, no tricks behind your words.

Three steps was all it took for him to close the gap between the two of you. Three agonizing slow steps. Your hands were clasped together, you didn’t even know why. You felt so small. He wouldn’t answer you. He just looked at you with that look on his face that mirrored yours yet had no purpose but to mock you. Like he was teasing you, just like he had always done. No, this wasn’t working for you at all. None of what you had been doing was working. He had set a trap for you and you foolishly fell right into it.

“Gabe,” you spoke, just barely above a whisper on shaken breath. He raised a hand to your cheek. It had barely touched you but the feeling of his calloused hand and the tension in the air had your flesh burning. Your eyes stung, too, as tears threatened to fall from them. Just like always, you fought at your instinct to cry. But you couldn’t stop a tear from sliding down your cheek and onto his hand.

“Gabe, please,” you were starting to raise your voice. You wanted to turn away, step back, retreat in some way. But he hand kept you there.

He crouched a bit, eyes level with yours. They were dark. Hazelnut brown and an empty black center that was so close to you, you could make out your own reflection. You could hardly recognize yourself.

“Look at you…” his voice was low, but affectionate. Like he was speaking to a wounded kitten, “And all this time I thought you were nothing but a brat.”

He lowered his hand from you cheek and onto the back of your neck. You felt a light squeeze from his grip and swallowed at the sensation, “As much as I want to keep you here, I think we both got places to be. Right, honey?”

Your face grew red with embarrassment at the sudden sweetness in his voice. He was talking to you like his pet, a part of you was relieved that he might not harm you but another part of you felt belittled and tormented. Still, you wanted to comply with him in some desperate hope to get out of this mess. So you nodded, mouth knit shut and eyes brimming with tears.

“Good. Then behave for me,” In a sudden movement, his hands gripped your shoulders tightly and you knees buckled in shock. You yelped as Gabe continued to push you down onto the floor. Your hands grabbed at his arms, trying to get him off of you but it was no use. He was far too strong for you to move him off of you. A hand moved to the back of your neck like before and another grabbed a handful of your hair and tugged gently, “The faster we get through this, the sooner you can get your shit and get out of here. If you don’t behave, then this won’t be pretty. Not one fucking bit.”

Gabe isn’t like you. He’s not the kind of guy who just says shit to scare people. When he declares his intent, he means it. And whatever picture he had in his head of what he was going to do to you if you didn’t comply, you certainly didn’t want to see it. You tried to relax your body as much as you could to cope with whatever he had planned for you.

His hand moved from your back and wrapped around your throat, the other forcing your head to look up at him. He didn’t grip hard but you were already choking on weak sobs and felt suffocated. You didn’t want to speak, didn’t want to piss him off or provoke him anymore than you already had. Apparently he didn’t mind, and pulled himself closer to you. His crouch was getting disturbingly close to your face, you averted your gaze away from him onto the floor.

Turns out, he didn’t like that. He tugged your hair to get your attention, “What’s the matter, you getting shy on me? Crazy, I never took you for the type. Always talking up a big game, but now look at you.”

With one swift motion, he unclasped his jeans. His briefs peaked through his open zipper and revealed his hard cock through the fabric. You gasped, not realizing what was happening up until that point. You had thought he was just going to beat the piss out of you. No, you couldn’t handle this. Mindlessly babbling, you begged him not to do this, asked him to please stop. Tears were running down your face frantically as you took in sharp, panicked breaths. Gabe soaked in the sight of you, growing larger at your pathetic display. This is exactly what he wanted. To tower over you, commanding complete control while you sit helpless before him. He grabbed a tuft of your hair, pulling hard as he forced your face onto his crouch. Your tongue spilled out and your hands tried to pull away from him but the more you pulled the harder he would grind into you. You could hear him laugh above you and felt his laughter vibrate through his body. It was useless, nothing was getting through to him.

He pulled you off of him and onto the floor. Before you could move, his legs caged you in before him, “C’mon, we’re just getting started.”

He grabbed your hair again, pulling you onto your knees. The floor was hard and cold and it didn’t take more than a few seconds for it to hurt your knees. You tried to get in a more comfortable position, but Gabe denied you at every turn. So you leaned on your knees, certain it would leave a mark.

Your face was level with his crouch and he made a display for you in undressing himself. Slowly tracing the band of his briefs, pulling down to show you the dark hair on his body. He was toying with you and enjoying every second of it, moaning with every touch. Part of you hoped that this was all he wanted, that he wouldn’t make you participate in bringing him pleasure besides watching. But when he sprung his leaking cock out of his briefs, you felt your self wanting to sink into the floor.

He was big and you were not prepared at all to take him. He stroked his cock, precum bubbling and drooling at the tip, “See that, baby” he hummed and laughed, enjoying himself, “You’re gonna clean up Daddy’s cock real nice, aren’t you?”

You didn’t think your face could get any hotter, but it did at that moment. More tears fell and you struggled to let out a normal breath. Gabe pulled harshly on your hair, “You better fucking answer me.”

It was too much. The stinging in your scalp, the hot tears on your burning face, the heavy beating of your heart in your chest. All you could do is resign yourself to his desire and pray to God this would all be over soon, “Yes, Daddy.”

He threw his head back and stroked himself faster, obviously very pleased with himself now that he had your total compliance. Exhaling, he looked down at the sight of you. Desperate tiny frame right next to his hard, leaking cock.

“Take it in your mouth. Don’t make me wait. I’m a busy man, I have shit to do.”

You opened your mouth and licked his tip clean, salty and slimey precum covering your tongue. Inch by inch you took him in your mouth. You fit half his cock in your mouth before his started pumping into you, lewd sounds of your gagging echoing in the empty room. Gabe groaned, hissed, growled in pleasure as he gently fucked your mouth, covering your face in spit and tears and his juices. You were a mess and he felt so fucking good. His thrust became faster, deeper and you choked on him with every one. You didn’t think you could possibly take him all in, but he forced your head down until your chin met with his plump balls and you nose was tickled by his pubic hair.

“That’s it, so good for Daddy,” sweat made his skin glow as he forced you deeper and deeper onto him, “you’re gonna swallow ever last drop of me, baby.”

You could hardly breath. Your mouth was full of the taste of him and the air around you smelled like his cock and sweat. He was all around you and you had no escape.

You sucked on his cock so hard your jaw felt like it was going to break. You just wanted this all to be over and done with. Fuck, all this for a fucking powerpoint presentation. Every part of you ached and burned. Even between your thighs, your own arousal was stirring without warning, desperately squeezing your thighs together for any sense of relief.

“You like that, baby?” he asked hoarsely, “If you weren’t such a fucking brat, maybe I would’ve let you cum.“

You cried out on his cock, sending waves of pleasure through him. He was getting close, frantically fucking your face with more fervor. It wasn’t long before he let go of your hair, putting both his hands on your head and using your mouth like a fucktoy.

“Don’t fuckin move baby, Daddy’s gonna cum right down your throat,” sweat dripped down his chest, right onto your lips as he held your face flush against him. In a few jagged pumps, he emptied himself in your mouth. It was warm and tasted so strongly of his cock that you couldn’t help but instantly swallow, not wanted to gag. More tears came rushing out of you. Thank God, it was finally over.

He let go of your face and you tore yourself from him, coughing and gasping for air. Gabe had to catch his breath, too. Leaning against a row of lockers, he cleaned himself off with a roll of paper towels nearby and redressed himself. You curled into a ball, completely humiliated and unsure what to do next. What time was it? Oh God, you still had to go to class.

You were interrupted when Gabe approached you, towel in hand. His chest was rising and falling, but he wasn’t panting anymore, “C’mon, get yourself cleaned up. I’ll get your shit.”

Reluctantly, you reached for the towel and cleaned whatever moisture on your face that hadn’t already dried up. Your hair was a complete mess. You tried your best to untangle it but there was no way you could fully restore it with just your fingers.

Gabe came back, your backpack in his hands. Your heart soared, relief washing over you, “Consider this a reward. You really impressed me today.”

You blushed, ashamed and not sure what to say. You felt embarrassed at having been so violated but a shallow part of you felt superficially flattered. You wanted to pull that part of you out and punch it in the fucking face.

He tutted, “You gonna be shy around me now? Shit, I don’t mind, you’re kinda cute like this.”

His arms wrapped around you in a soft hug and your body froze. This was all too much for you, “It’s okay, baby. Let me walk you to class. No one’s gonna give a shit if I’m late.”

“I don’t feel good,” you said softly, throat sore and raw after the abuse.

“Poor thing,” Gabe pulled away to get a look at your face. You still wouldn’t look at him. He felt like a fucking king when you were blowing him but looking at you now… Well he kind of felt like a shit head. But damn if you didn’t like good, “Skip class with me. Let’s get you something to eat.”

You didn’t want to be with Gabe right now. But you didn’t want to go to class either. You just wanted to go to bed, “Can you take me home, Gabe?”

“Of course, baby,” He stroked your hair and gave you and gentle kiss on the forehead, you recoiled, “Let’s get you home, alright?”

#punching the air and screaming into the void with this one #ig ow2 have me back here oh well #yandere #yandere overwatch #yandere!overwatch #dark overwatch #dark!overwatch #yandere reaper #reaper x reader #overwatch au #yandere gabriel reyes #gabriel reyes x reader #gabriel reyes #yandere!gabriel reyes #daddy issues #tw: noncon #tw: dubious consent

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spiritmunie · 4 months

Note

Do you have any rec for toxic destiel fics? Besides with understanding

He Can’t Sleep by 60r3d0m

This fic focuses on Cas really struggling mentally after Lucifer's possession of him, and Dean flailing while trying to help him, and on top of that Cas is losing his grace. I was talking about this fic with Doe yesterday... it is seriously so memorable but I don't want to spoil too much

i fold in half so easily by AreYouReady

Basically this fic shows how Cas tries to reconcile what ended up happening to Jack in season 15 with his love for Dean, something I think is really hard to do but this fic does well :))

A Winter’s Tale by NorthernSparrow

This fic isn't really toxic persay, but it chronicles Cas' time being homeless in a journal he wrote in. It's also kind of a gen fic. I just love this one because it hurts so much to read but it's so well written. This author is really good at fleshing out details about the world, so I've read most of their fics.

I Shall Not Want by domesticadventures

Now that I like Sam so much, this fic is special to me because it deals a lot with Dean and Sam's codependency issues hahaha. The fic also has a lot of Cas struggling to be human, which is one of my favorite things.

On Labor a_good_soldier

tw for dubious consent

This is a post 15x18 fic where Dean sleeps with Cas out of gratefulness / because he thinks it will keep Cas from leaving him. This one is popular so you might have seen it before.

Cuckoo and Nest by komodobits

Another fic with Human-ish Cas and miscommunication issues <3 I haven't read this in a while so I don't remember much but it's good.

wrap orion’s belt around my neck by sonatine

tw for dubious consent

All these author's fics just have really beautiful prose <333 the fic is about Dean loving Cas throughout the years in different vessels- the dubious consent warning is for the vessels and the baby trapping

White Noise by saltyfeathers

I think this fic is the most similar to With Understanding in terms of the alternate universe, the psychological horror, and the subject matter, but I don't want to reveal too much about the plot :))

#None of these are as toxic as with understanding though...#anyway destiel fics love to sprinkle in miscommunication all the time which i appreciate bc it's pretty much my favorite trope #i would love to find more gen fics and other ships that have crazy miscommunication...#thanks for the ask anon!#i only recently got good at organizing my bookmarks on ao3 so sorry i don't have more recs #any other toxic destiel fic I may have read is lost to the void but these are the ones i remember #asks #tw dubcon #tw consent issues #fic recs #destiel

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zxphy · 1 year

Text

🌧 Yelan x Nonbinary! Reader.

Tws/cws: Mommy kink, AFAB reader, strap-ons, can be read as dubcon, Yelan fingerblasting you into oblivion, and INCREDIBLY cringe writing. Btw you're autistic, if you weren't before, you are now lmao. Also may have TERRIBLE spelling and spelling.

Smut written by a minor, dni if uncomfortable.

You and the cobalt-haired agent stood alone in one of Wangshu Inn's many corridors. You have one job as a Fatui soldier.

Assassinate Yelan.

You looked her up and down as you trailed behind her. You honestly thought that she was really attractive. You quickly snapped out of your thoughts and followed close behind her, she turned a corner. Now's your chance.

You raise your sword in the air ready to strike down on her with your blade with the intention to kill.

Too bad, the sneak attack didn't work, not by a long shot. Yelan was two steps ahead, before you could even come close to killing her, she grabbed your hands quickly disarming you quickly, and pinned you against a wall with your arms behind your back.

"My, my, what do we have here? Someone trying to kill me?" She asked, pressing your own blade against your neck.

"I-I don't know what you're t-t-talking about ma'am." You stammered out quickly, you didn't wanna die like this, but you don't want to betray her majesty. You have to think of something, fast.

"Don't play coy with me, darling." The agent pressed the blade slightly harder on your neck, more specifically, against your carotid. "Who sent you? And no dilly dallying." She continued.

You whimpered as you felt the cold metal against your throat. Shit. You can't die, not like this.

"The fatui m-ma'am. I was sent p-personally by her majesty." You finally let out.

"Awh, the Tsarita herself sent someone for little ol' me?" Yelan pouted before smirking, "Doesn't she have better things to do?"

Remembering that you're both in a public corridor, Yelan lowered the sword from your neck, pressing the tip of the icy cold metal against your exposed back. Enough to prick your delicate skin, but not enough to draw blood.

"Let's go somewhere I little more private, sweetheart." You blushed at the pet name and nodded slowly.

-------------------------------------------------------

Yelan lead you to her room of the inn and shoved you in before walking in and closing the door behind her.

"Oh right! Before you dare to try anything, give me your hands, now." She glared at you, and you quickly raised your hands for her.

The agent grabbed your wrists and tied them together with some kind of hydro rope.

It's icredibly firm, keeping you in place.

Your mind started to wonder off in a different direction. You started to blush.

You snapped out of your thoughts as Yelan climbed on top of you, your cheeks growing hotter and hotter by the second.

Yelan is incredibly intimidating, but in a hot way, you found yourself getting wet. You shamefully rubbed your thighs together as you felt the agent's warm breath against your neck.

(Un)Fortunately for you, that didn't go unoticed, she flashed a mischievous grin. "Well sweetheart, getting a bit excited are we?"

You didn't answer.

She put her finger on your chest and slowly dragged it down to your crotch, wetness seeping from your pussy through your shorts, you were soaked.

"Goodness dear, I didn't think you'd be enjoying this this much."

Yelan started rubbing your pussy through the shorts of your uniform. Not too long after that she shoved her hands into your shorts, past your panties, dipping her index finger in and out of your cunt.

Soon enough, she added another digit, slick sounds of the agent's fingers filling the lavish inn's bedroom.

"H-hey, wait I don't t-think we should-" She cuts you off.

"Ah ah ah darling, don't speak. Just relax and enjoy." She said in a sickly sweet voice and had pure lust in her eyes. She abruptly sped up the pace, and you feel the knot that's been building up inside you about to burst. The agent's long digits going in and out of your puffy cunt is all you could think about. You stiffen as you feel an orgasm approaching.

Yelan looked at you with a smug grin on her face, "Yeah? Gonna cum sweetheart?" Another one of her fingers found your clit and began rubbing circles on the sensitive bundle of nerves.

"Ah- wait! Slow down, I-I'm gonna-"

"Cum? You're gonna cum? Go ahead. Cum for Mommy." She curls her fingers up a bit, hitting that one heavenly spot inside you that makes you scream.

"That's it darling, go on. Make a mess on Mommy's fingers." It was all too much, Yelan's fingers deep in your pussy and rubbing around your puffy clit, you couldn't hold back much longer.

You arched your back and squeezed your eyes shut, the intense sensations between your legs making you squeal incoherent noises like a dummy. Your climax hits you...hard. Your juices gushed and squirted all over the agent's fingers, doing exactly what she wanted.

Making a mess.

You huff and slowly came down from your high, the intense aftermath of your orgasm tiring you out, you let yourself go limp and fall onto the floor.

Yelan got off of you, pulling her hands out of your pants. She scooped you up into her strong arms, and rest you on top of her bed "so you could be more comfortable."

You lay tiredly on the bed, probably about to fall asleep until Yelan spoke up.

"Hold on darling, don't get too relaxed over there, we haven't even gotten to the fun part yet." She smirked and left the room.

The "fun part"? She came back after a quick moment with a strap-on. Whatever tiredness you had vanished and you woke right the fuck up. The dildo attached to the harness was huge. Was that even going to fit inside of you?? You stared at Yelan in utter disbelief. "Ain't no way."

She buckled the harness to her waist and smiled, "Don't worry sweetheart, it's gonna fit."

Yelan brought your body closer to hers, the thin layers of clothes being the only thing separating your core and her cock. "Let's get these pesky clothes out of the way." She peeled off your shorts, quickly discarded them, and smirked when she saw your soaked panties.

She slowly pulled down your frilly panties to your knees, the agent wanted to savour the reveal of your cunt. She spread your legs, and stared at your glistening pussy for a minute, loving how your puffy pussy looks so inviting.

"Alright then, let's get this show started." the agent gripped your hips and slowly but surely started to push inside of your cunt, the juices of your previous orgasm made it much easier.

After what felt like a long time, she finally hilted, the tip of her cock against your cervix. You felt so full.

Yelan stood there for a moment enjoying the sight of you under her and your tight walls wrapped so deliciously around her cock.

However, that didn't last long, cause a short second later, she pulled back, only the tip remaining inside you, then SLAMMED right back in. The process was repeated, over and over and over again, until the noises of skin slapping and your squealing filled the room.

"You're being so loud dear," she said between thrusts, "it's like you want the entirety of the inn to know that I'm fucking you stupid."

"Nghh-!! I'm s-sorry!!" you replied back, trying to keep your composure.

"Don't worry dear. It's okay. Go on, tell the whole world who's making you feel good."

"A-ah!! Mommy is m-making me feel guh-good!!"Yelan's fingers once again found your clit and began rubbing circles into it making you scream out in pure bliss.

"That's it baby, keep making such pretty noises for me!" Yelan pulled out, flipped you over then started pounding into you from behind, going even deeper than before, her cock kissing your cervix with each thrust, making you squeal and moan out in delight.

She sped up her hip movement, each time she hilted in you making you scream as you approached your second high, this one much more intense than the first.

With one hard final thrust, you came. Your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave as it washed over you, you squirmed and writhed under Yelan as you creamed on her cock, your juices soaking the bed sheets under you.

When you came down from your intense high, Yelan pulled out of you and laid beside you, pulling you close to her body, and began to spoon you. You're too exhausted to object.

She kissed your head and whispered into your ear holding you close.

"I think I'm going to keep you."

HOLY FUCKING SHIT NUGGETS I FINALLY FINISHED IT. Honestly it came out better than I expected!! I'm sorry it took so long, school is really fuckin me up rn, but better late than never I guess!! I hope you guys enjoyed it!! :3

#🌧⋆⁺₊⋆✿:zeze's creations✧#yelan x reader #yandere yelan #yandere genshin impact #yandere genshin impact smut #yandere genshin smut #yelan smut #mommy issues #mommy fr #tw dubious consent #tw dubcon #I think??#mommy milkers #hot mommy #darkfic #tw yandere #dark content #genshin smut #genshin impact smut

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marcskywalker · 8 months

Text

even if it's a lie, let me hear it once

Chapter 1

He catches Merlin staring at him sometimes; when they're riding through the woods for one thing or another, when he's training on the grounds, when he's sitting through a verbal beatdown at dinner.

He catches Merlin linger by his side. Though this, he is not too sure of. He tries to keep count when Merlin's hand warms the small of his back. But his heart flutters and he stumbles over the number as Merlin straightens out the shirt.

Wishful thinking, Arthur. he reminds himself, that's all it is.

He meets Sophia when he least expects it.

Dear God, Sophia.

How he ever lived before her is a mystery. He knows it in his bones that he loves her so deeply and would go to any end for her.

She is his only source of happiness and he would die before he lets any harm come to her.

But when she presses her lips against his, he feels dirty. Repulsive. His skin itches like he was meant to be someone else's.

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He almost dies. And he almost dies. And he is almost sure he is going to die.

The druid boy, he is sure, was worth the risk of punishment for treason.

Death by a dead knight would've been nothing honorable or remarkable.

This would be honorable though, if he were to die fighting for Merlin Ealdor. As long as the history books don't mention his crush, that is.

"Whatever happens out there, I don't want you to think of me differently."

Arthur has to choke down the bubbling laughter. As if. Short of dying, there is nothing Merlin could do that'll change how Arthur's heart skips a beat for him.

But... the thought makes Arthur pause. Why would Merlin be worried about that at a time like this. For the first time in his life, Arthur wants to talk. No propriety or honorifics. He wants to know if Merlin is simply worried about his master's opinion or something else, entirely.

What if he were to die today, and Merlin never knew that he was liked?

"It's alright, Merlin. It's normal to be scared before battle." he says instead.

"That's not what I meant," Merlin's solemn face, as rare a sight that is, sobers him up.

Did he mean....

Could it be....

If this is what Arthur hopes thinks it is, his father would never approve. Oh, but Arthur would. Arthur would approve of it so much.

"What is it," give me a hint, I beg of you, "If you have something to say, Merlin, now is the time."

He tries to put as much love and acceptance on his face in hopes that Merlin would just stop clenching his jaw.

Come on, Merlin. Take a leap. You won't be let down.

Just as Merlin's about to speak-

"Arthur, it's time."

The bloody harpy!

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Arthur gives him space to grieve Will. Though a sorcerer, he was Merlin's best friend.

He peels himself away from Merlin's side; away from the God awful sound of his sobs.

Wishful thinking, Arthur. he reminds himself, that's all it is.

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He almost dies a couple of times again. Such is life.

He tries to put the whole "Merlin situation" behind him. Determined to forget. It's just not meant to be.

He almost courts Gwen, but then Lancelot happens again. And he won't fault her for it since he has half a mind to court Lancelot himself.

Maybe it's something about him; it's just not meant to be.

It's nothing to make much of a fuss. He's glad he has them in his life at all.

He's grateful, even.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Magic or not; he killed his mother. At least with the former, he had the excuse to be angry at his father. The sorcerer lies though, turns out the burden is his to bear alone.

"Arthur," he stops him before the his bed, "let's get you out of this."

He tugs at the armor straps with more care than usual. Arthur is sure that Merlin is back with the staring. He doesn't count the touches; not anymore and especially not at the moment when he barely feels deserving of being alive let alone loved.

"Whatever you're thinking of," Merlin's voice is soft as he moves Arthur onto the bed, "It's not true.

You're a good son."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The dragon is looming above them when he realizes this.

The "Merlin situation" is, in fact, not behind him.

It has come forth with a vengeance.

Well, how could it not. It's Merlin and he has, for wildly unknown reason, decided to be loyal to Arthur beyond what he deserves.

Not only is he back to counting the staring and the touching; now he counts Merlin's laughs and his approvals (of all things, really). His day is lighter when Merlin is happy and smiling about. The days when Merlin doesn't retort to his snark is.... frustrating, to say the least.

The dragon bares its teeth when he prays for the first time.

Dear God, don't let any harm come to him. I'll give my life for his.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There is to be feast in his honor. For the courage and bravery he showed by defeating the dragon.

He doesn't feel courageous walking beside Merlin. He feels like a fool with sweaty palms that wants and doesn't want to have this conversation.

It's long overdue, Arthur he reminds himself as they enter his chambers.

He's defeated a dragon. What's one more act of bravery.

"Merlin, I- We- No, I- I have something to say."

Merlin is suspicious already, looking at Arthur with wide eyes.

"What is it?" It's that rare soft voice. The one that understands this isn't the time for their usual banter.

"We should sit," he drags two chairs, stalling for the last time, "I will say it, and don't interrupt me. I just- I- No, this needs to be said and-"

"Arthur, are you dying?" Merlin's eyes are so wide it's almost comical to him.

"I just said don't interrupt," he shakes his head fondly, trust Merlin to never obey. Merlin's eyes are still wide and overflowing with concern that Arthur can't help but reassure him, "No! I'm not dying.

It's just something I've wanted for a long time, and- I wasn't going to say anything, really. I know this is difficult. And I will accept that you don't feel the same, Merlin, I promise. This doesn't change anything. It's just-" he has no courage, none at all, to face Merlin. So, he studies the shades of his floor as he confesses.

"It's just that I couldn't let either of us die without you knowing that I love you."

There is silence. And then even more of it. He risks a glance at Merlin who looks confused. He sees the moment his words sink in though, since he exploded out of the chair, knocking it over in the process.

"No. You don't."

What.

"I do!"

"Nope." he points a stern finger at Arthur, face lined with anger, "You don't."

"I do! What is wrong with you?" he can't help the crack in his voice. That was a losing game from the start, "I told you, Merlin. I understand you don't feel the same-"

"What is wrong with you?" he's at Arthur's face now, inches away (so different to how Arthur would dream of it), fuming, "Why would you ever love your manservant?!"

Something cracks inside Arthur's chest. This isn't what he wanted. He was supposed to be let down gently, with the promise of cherished friendship.

"Surely, you know you're more than that." it's barely a whisper, he wonders if Merlin heard him.

"Arthur," he's not yelling anymore, but it's just as strong, "You. Don't. Love. Me."

He leaves him there and the tears come out.

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please don't let him love me. please don't let him love me. please don't let him love me. please don't let him love me. please don't-

#arthur pendragon #merlin #bbc merlin #merthur #arthur pov #bisexual arthur pendragon #tw dubious consent #tw self worth issues #omg am I terrible at dialogues #this is more like a writing exercise than anything else #liya writes #unrequited love but not really #even if it's a lie let me hear it once #chapter 1 #next chapter is merlin pov I promise

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