#ty anxiety

[tesco-finest-aromantics]

i feel like the queer community lost when we started policing labels and making sure everyone used the Correct™ labels instead of letting a person decide what feels right for them

#caique posts #inspired by a post a trans guy made asking if it was okay for him to keep identifying as a lesbian even though he’s now a man #and all the comments telling him no because lesbians can’t be men #and also all the other posts of people asking if they’re ''allowed'' to use certain labels #why do you need permission? #who are you even asking permission from? #we’re not cops #do whatever you want forvever #also inspired by an article in a zine in the 80s/90s of two FtMs in a T4T relationship #one of them described the relationship as being between a butch and his sissy boy #i cannot ever imagine anyone calling themselves that nowadays #because of ''only lesbians can be butches'' and ''sissy is offensive'' discourse #i’m sure there are people out there who would want to describe their relationship like that but don’t feel they’re ''allowed'' to #anyway lots of baby queers are tying themselves in knots trying to figure themselves out #and they’re more concerned with using the Correct™ label instead of the one they feel most comfortable with #yeah i just don’t like it #knowing you’re queer should be a liberating feeling #instead of something anxiety-inducing because you’re worried if you’re using labels wrong

[lionfloss]

i hate this one specific type of anxiety i experience where i just feel like i did something wrong. Like almost as if i did something really bad and im waiting for the consequences. and it takes me out of my headspace and im just sitting here thinking...what did i do? what am i not remembering?

#i know this is common #but my anxiety manifests in a lot of ways and is usually very physical #versus the intrusive thoughts #as im tying this i remember i stopped taking my SSRI #and that probably explains why im feeling this way and havent otherwise the past year or so :')

[red-flagging]

💛 seb/lewis :-)

(kiss fic prompts!)

a little epilogue to rabbits are chasing :)

Lewis's flight lands at 8:02PM, which means that by 7:31PM, Seb is parked outside the airport arrivals door, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel and scanning the sky for approaching planes.

It's quite silly, getting here so early, but it's not as if there's much left to do at home. There's roast vegetables waiting in the oven, the cauliflower steaks that he started marinating earlier this morning chilling in the fridge. Mina and Ellie are safely ensconced in their duck coop with the heater turned on for the night. The sheets on the guest bed are freshly washed.

The car parked behind him starts up. Its headlights illuminate Seb's cabin. For a moment, he catches a glimpse of himself, harried and too-bright, in the rearview mirror. He scrubs his hands down his face. Christ. Get it together, Sebastian. He is a full 39 years old. Far too old to be getting the same jitters that he did the first time he invited a girl over at age 17, agonizing about what album to have playing when they came back to his room. Lewis is far too old for Seb to be doing all this. Lewis might not even be gay.

His phone buzzes. Seb nearly jumps out of his seat.

Lewis

just landed

getting my luggage now

hows it so freaking cold here

The inside of the car is already fogging up. When he'd asked Lewis to send dates he could come visit and Lewis had said just so you know the next few months are kind of crazy for me, Seb had expected late fall, maybe the holidays. Not the middle of slush season, when all the roads up the mountain have a 50/50 chance of being so muddy that they're undriveable.

Sebastian

I'm outside, in the blue Infiniti :)

He glances back up at himself in the mirror. The scab from where a wood chip caught the corner of his eyebrow while he was sanding the new planter box is almost healed over. His hair looks as good as it's ever going to. If Lewis asks whether he's been using conditioner, he's fucked.

It shouldn't feel like this. Seb beat Lewis to Senna's record, and Lewis still laughed at all his jokes the next season. Lewis watched Seb DNF twice in five races and still said in the media pen that he was waiting for the day Seb would be back up on the podium with him. When they inevitably auction off Lewis's Le Mans racesuit, it'll have to be with Seb's snot all over the front of it, because Lewis let Seb sob all over him and then laughed as he wiped sweat off of Seb's cheek with the sleeve. After all that – the fact that he's about to be in Seb's house for the next week shouldn't make Seb feel like he's standing in front of Lewis naked, without even the promise of a fast car or a good competition to distract Lewis from looking right at him.

His phone buzzes again.

Lewis

outside i think

Seb peers through the windscreen. Lewis – or rather, the blurry figure lugging a giant suitcase behind him that he assumes is Lewis – waves at him from the sidewalk. Seb flashes his lights at him twice.

The back door opens and Lewis's head, along with a burst of cold night air, pops in. "Hey," he says, a little breathlessly. "I don't think this is going to fit in the back."

It does, eventually, but not without a fight that involves Seb having to climb into the trunk alongside Lewis's suitcase and physically wrestle it into place while Lewis shoves from behind. They're both out of breath by the time they finally climb back in the front and slam the doors shut.

"You know, there are beds at the farm," Seb points out. "You didn't have to pack your own."

Lewis shakes his head, tugging off his gloves. His coat collar is turned up around his neck. He's wearing an an ear warmer headband, held in place by two butterfly pins. Every other bit of uncovered skin is pink, even with the heat in the car up at full blast. Lewis shoves his fingers in front of the vents and sighs with relief, closing his eyes. "Ugh, thank God," he says. He sounds exhausted. "Listen, you're lucky I fit everything into one." It sounds far less like a joke than Seb would hope. The fact that the fondness in Seb's chest still manages to outweigh the exasperation is probably a sign that Seb's beyond salvation.

"Next time I'll bring a trailer so you can fit your bathtub and toilet, too," he says, reaching for the keys. The engine purrs to life as he flicks the lights back on, then leans forward to scrub the worst of the fog off the windscreen. The thermometer on the dash says it's still 3 degrees outside. They might still be able to make it back before the slush freezes over. "Okay," he says, sitting back down and twisting around to reach for his seatbelt. "Ready to go?"

Lewis doesn't say anything. When Seb looks over, he's staring out the front window, playing with one of his rings.

"Lewis?" Seb asks.

Lewis's head jerks around. "Hm?" he says. "Oh. Yeah." He doesn't move to put on his seatbelt.

Seb frowns. Kills the engine so he can properly turn in his seat. "Lewis," he says. "Is everything –"

Lewis leans across the console and kisses him.

It's barely half a second. Seb still hasn't moved by the time Lewis sits back down on his side of the car.

"Uh," Lewis says, after a second. He clears his throat. "Sorry. I just – Shit. Sorry. The whole way over, all I could think about was – I had to get it over with before I chickened out."

He's fiddling with his rings again, but his eyes stay fixed on Seb's. His jaw is set. He still looks half-ready to bolt through the door behind him, out into the night.

"Well, you don't have to make it sound like taking your medicine, Christ," Seb says hoarsely, and drags Lewis back across the console to kiss him properly.

Lewis's lips are still cold. When Seb opens his mouth, Lewis sighs, pressing in closer with a soft sound that makes Seb want to go twenty years back in time and kick himself for not figuring out how to make Lewis make that noise sooner. His hands settle on Seb's wrists, holding him in place. Seb slides his own hands up, cradling the back of Lewis's head, to return the favor.

When he finally pulls away just far enough to catch his breath, Lewis follows him, close enough that their noses bump. His eyes are wide. This close up, Seb can see the dark circles under them more clearly.

He closes his eyes. Lewis is still there when he opens them.

"How long have you been awake?" he asks.

Lewis blinks. "What," he says. "Are you talking about."

"Sleep deprivation," Seb says. His heart is pounding hard enough that he feels it in his throat. "People start to get delirious when they're tired enough –"

"I was awake for 24 hours and I didn't kiss you at the end," Lewis interrupts, his eyes sharp and bright. "I'm not making the same mistake twice."

Seb opens his mouth and nothing comes out. He tries again. Still nothing.

"Fuck," he says, closing his eyes. "Okay. Okay." He drags himself back upright and reaches for the keys. "We can – tomorrow. But we should – you need to shower. And sleep." Lewis's hand settles on his leg. Seb rests his own on top of it; after a second, he squeezes Lewis's fingers gently. Lewis flips his hand over and laces their fingers together.

"Yeah," Lewis says. His thumb traces over Seb's knuckles. "That – tomorrow sounds good."

The slush crackles under the tires when Seb starts to move. Ahead of them, the headlights carve a path through the darkness. Lewis's hand is a solid, steady weight against his leg. "Okay," Seb says, to himself, to both of them, to no one. Lewis hums softly from his side of the car. He squeezes Seb's knee gently.

Seb closes his eyes for a second. "Okay," he says quietly. "Yeah. Let's go home."

#my fic #collarboen #rpf #sorry to possibly?? retcon the fade to black kiss at the end of rabbits are chasing and be like PSYCH it took 9 months after that...but in #my heart this has always* been the truth #*i came up with it ten minutes into brainstorming this prompt but now i'm attached to it and have accepted it into my heart and home #the post-retirement post-gay awakening post-journey of self acceptance slow burn slash anxiety spiral #that happened over the 9 month interlude on lewis's end is left as a thought experiment for the reader :) #thank u for giving me an excuse to write this autumn :) #i am slowly making my way through the rest of these lol ty to everyone who has sent them in they've been so fun!! #you are welcome to send in more but just be warned that the next batch will probably take. much longer lol. but i will keep doing my best 🫡

[rainymoonbows]

little carry contest for the win - PiB; TLW short comic

took inspo from @/jo_bilee on twitter

closeups under cut

yeah, let’s say Perrito doesn’t have the same strength as the other two, but he tries!

Puss is also a big softie and he’s protective of his friends and if anything happens to them he will start to panic because “omg wth what holy shit are you okay??!!”

#puss in boots the last wish #puss in boots #perrito puss in boots #kitty softpaws #puss in boots the last wish spoilers #puss in boots spoilers #?? #I love them #they have an indestructible bond #BAMF kitty softpaws supremacy #dreamworks: lets put anxiety in this orange cat for funsies! #me: ty you’re giving me fantastic opportunities #expect some more content of these idiots #omg I forgot Puss’ belt #fuck it #the quality drop uRKKDJF

[soc1850]

doodle request: Roman being comforted after a nightmare

i figure virgil would be experienced in the whole nightmares thing - personal hc bsjebsbsbj

this can be platonic or romantic tbh im just a sucker for v and ro in general

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #virgil anxiety #roman sanders #roman creativity #ts virgil #ts roman #sasi #tss #TY FOR THE ASK #my art #prinxiety

[lotus-pear]

collecting bsd mutuals like pokemon rn lmao

#u guys should like.. comment below if u like bsd and are an artist/writer i need more of you #literally shock of my life when i scroll through my followers and i see a tumblrfamous artist/writer that has been following me for MONTHS #but my dumbass notifs regretted to inform me #so i meekly have to creep up to their inbox and kneel in front of them and be like “ty for gracing my humble blog with ur presence” #before hitting follow #actually gives me anxiety that they must think im so self absorbed that i wouldn't want to follow them back #like “oh she thought she made ONE good post and shes suddenly entitled” NO NO NO I PROMISE THATS NO IT #anyway. opened up there a little too much💀 #bsd ppl come forth rn

[aldoodles]

It’s gonna be ok, Lizzie

#gregor and his sisters are the most siblings ever #tfw ur brother and baby sister falling down a hole in the basement contributes to ur developing an anxiety disorder #:/ #ty suzanne collins for always writing siblings so well #al chatters #my art #doodles #sketchy sketchy #fanart #tuc Lizzie #tuc gregor #gregor the overlander #gregor tuc #the underland chronicles #the underland chronicles fanart #i wanted to try drawing Lizzie’s braids as shapes like I would w strands of hair but a little more distinct. it wasn’t super successful #I will do better next time #tux

[emmedoesntdomath]

harley, clicking the lighter: what’s that phrase? ask for forgiveness instead of permission? 

peter, watching him hold the lighter up:

peter: see, I have this thing called anxiety-

#throwback to the time I called peter #‘everyone’s social anxiety personified’ #like let’s be real #this bitch is panicking #marvel incorrect quotes #marvel 616 #marvel cinematic universe #marvel #mcu #peter 3 #peter parker #bi peter parker #tom holland #spider man #spiderman #harley keener #ty simpkins #peter x harley #harley keener x peter parker #parley #parkner #emme’s bad ideas #emme’s incorrect quotes

[khihi]

he's such a tease

#joker out #bojan cvjetićanin #let me hear it now ty #i'm so excited <3 #“why are you awake this late to see this” anxiety go brr #so this made me smile thank u bojči

[nocturnalmoonmind]

Tessa: You don't have many friends in London, Kit. What happened to you and Ty? He's such a nice bo-

Kit: *jumps out of the car*

#can't wait for twp #kit's anxiety #kit herondale #kit herongraystairs #tessa gray #ty blackthorn #kit x ty #kitty #heronthorn #twp #the wicked powers

[homosandhomies]

we as a society talk plenty about spencer shay having adhd but we have failed to talk about carly shay having generalized anxiety disorder

#ty quinton reviews for pointing it out #this girl is a walking ball of anxiety #summer says stuff #carly shay #icarly

[ilovedirt]

Could I possibly get some personal stories about people who resisted accepting pharmaceutical medications for their mental health issues but ultimately decided to pursue them as a means for recovery? What caused your resistance? What caused you to change your mind? How did the process of transitioning to pharmaceuticals go for you (was it difficult, successful, did you have to go through multiple medications, do you still experience symptoms or side effects that may lead you to change your mind again, etc.)?

Asking for a friend and the friend is me

Big thank

#i need authenticity here so if youre uncomfortable posting a public response please dm me or submit on anon #im trying to decide if the time is coming up for me to try pharmaceuticals as a remedy but i am struggle to pursue them for a few reasons #double points if youre open to further conversation and questions i might have if your experiences are relevant to me #ty #mental health #medication #mental illness #recovery #therapy #psychiatry #cptsd #bipolar #autism #anxiety #dissociation #etc

[soc1850]

I saw you were looking for art requests, I've been thinking about this for a while now

Since Virgil is like a spider, I was thinking like his room would extend really high vertically and he would have like a bunch of webs going upwards to like a little secluded spot so that he can't be bothered even when the other sides go in his room

thank you!

i drew this in like five minutes so it’s terrible but I LOVE THIS IDEAAAA. stolen. my hc now /lh

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #virgil anxiety #fanart #tss #sasi #ty for the ask!

[good-beanswrites]

And here's one with Weak for Fuuta and Amane, for anon! I've recently been going crazy over some ideas from posts about Fuuta and food and he and Amane's relationship, and they came together perfectly with the prompt -- thank you for the request 👀👀👀

“Can you be quiet for one minute?” 

Fuuta spun around from where he’d been complaining loudly about the food, with his mouth full of it, to find Amane glaring from beside him.

“I’ll do whatever the hell I want,” he said through bites. He paused to swallow, though. And take a sip of his drink. And then forgot was he was talking about anyway.

Amane returned to mouthing a blessing over her food. The annoyance in her expression melted away to serenity as she brought her hands together. Fuuta watched as she drew herself up. Then she ate calmly. He could have crumbled in shame, right then, at the thought of this tiny kid holding up better than himself. 

She, too, had experienced the punishments that came with their verdict. Restraints pulled so tight it’s hard to breathe. Long nights of maddening voices and watchful eyes. The smaller meal portions leading to shaky limbs. Fuuta spent every meal inhaling as much as he could as soon as he could -- and here Amane sat as if she had a perfectly content stomach. Through everything, she maintained her strong gaze and commanding voice.

Fuuta reminded himself she did have a few advantages over him. She still had all her eyes and ribs intact, for one. It was difficult to give someone a convincing stinkeye with only one eye.

While he continued shoveling down his meal, he noticed her separating things on her plate. The meat in the corner went completely untouched. 

The aforementioned treatment had made him irritable -- more irritable than usual, that is -- and he jabbed his utensils at her. “Hey, we talked about this. Eat your fucking meat. I’ve been eating my vegetables, yeah?” Not that he wanted to. He would have eaten just about anything they put in front of him if it kept the gnawing hunger at bay.

“It’s against my beliefs,” she said simply. 

“I thought suicide was, too.”

She raised her chin. “I’ve known plenty who have fasted and become stronger for it. This is nothing drastic.”

Fuuta grit his teeth. He’d witnessed his fair share of internet-goers who acted cruel about another’s religion. He wasn’t about to join them in being some piece of shit who forced her to do something that was against her code. But there was no way he was going to sit around and watch her starve herself, either.

He couldn’t blame Amane for how harshly she’d refused help from the others -- they coddled her, encouraging her with sweet talk, or tried an insufferable stern parental tone. Fuuta wasn’t cut out for any of those methods, anyway. What he did know how to do, however, was make threats. 

Even if Amane didn’t fear death, he knew there was one situation she would do absolutely anything to avoid. 

“Oi, if you get any weaker, Shidou’s gonna step in.” Her frown twitched. “He’s already harassed me and Mahiru about our meals. He saw my hand shake one time and hasn't stopped hounding me about it since. The minute he can tell you’re not eating enough, he’ll be all over you. And let me tell you, you’re not very subtle about it.” 

The final statement came out with more bite than intended. Maybe he was bitter that she was at least more subtle than him. Maybe he thought it was fucked up the way she, too, had grown visibly weaker. Maybe he was just hungry and tired of talking. He attacked another mouthful of food. 

Amane was searching her plate as if the answer could be found there. There was a long silence as she contemplated. Fuuta had thought he’d won until she shook her head. “No. I can’t.”

He rolled his eyes and head in an over dramatic show of exasperation. “So stubborn!”  When he was done chewing, he picked up his plate. “Fine.” He gathered up all that was left, dumping it onto hers with a flick. 

A fire ignited in her gaze. She shoved the dish away. “I’m not some weak child to be pitied.”

“Wha–? It’s not pity!”

“You think I’m weak.”

“I think you’re hungry!”

“You don’t know anything!”

Mikoto passed by, chuckling as they raised their voices. “Look at you two hotheaded kids. Do I need to break it up?”

“Go away!” they chorused.

“Alright, sheesh…” He kept walking, leaving the pair to stew in silence. 

Fuuta didn’t have it in him to fight today. He was tired. He ached all over. If she wasn’t going to appreciate his help, so be it. He was starting to get used to his good intentions being taken the wrong way. It looked like he was just the weak one, after all. He grabbed his empty plate and stood to leave.

“Fuuta.” Amane took a deep breath. “I am hungry.” She gestured for him to come back. Then she moved the meat from her plate onto his.

He eyed the offering, hoping his expression didn’t betray how desperately he wanted to scoff it down. “I’m not some asshole who’s gonna take your food.”

“You’re not taking it. I’m giving it. I would have thrown it out otherwise.” Amane picked up some of the vegetables. “In return, I will eat this. We both must stay strong for the ordeals ahead.”

After a moment of hesitation, Fuuta sat back down. He took a bite. Neither said a proper thank you. Neither needed one.

He glanced to Amane with a smirk. “Good. This way, we’ll both keep that geezer Shidou away.”

It was only for a moment, but for the first time since the second trial began, Fuuta could have sworn her lips slipped into a small smile. 

#milgram #fuuta kajiyama #amane momose #oh yeah it also references that minigram/timeline about her not eating meat and him not finishing his vegetables #the fuuta/food one was from a bit ago but its been in my head again after his timeline convo making sure haruka was eating #thank you for the request ahh this was so much fun :D #ive had so many amane thoughts with purge march coming up - and its always a good day to get emotional over fuuta dsfdsfds #i always thought their timelines were really interesting with how calm she is and how completely wracked with anxiety he is #i think hed be pretty aware and ashamed of that #rip mikoto but i needed to show that they find kinship in being treated younger than they want because of their age+attitude 😂 #i picture a very sibling relationship for them #you dont really coddle your younger siblings the same you would with other kids #so they have a lot of respect and also frustration towards each other... #i actually think fuuta has a lot of respect for shidou too but can lean into his annoyance for amanes sake #ahh ty and i hope you enjoyed! #like i said this one was a lot of fun to write omg #drabbles

[soft-girl-musings]

dude at the store very loudly said he loved my daredevil shirt when i walked in, proceeded to clock out at the till i'd just made my purchase at and he kept going on and on about the show. called me "love" when we walked out and said bye.

(why do i feel like im in fight or flight nothing was wrong)

#ty to his female coworker who jumped in with her 2 cents it was v fun #everyone was nice (and i have my fancy soaps now) but jfc why did that trigger my anxiety #if this is bc of my ex again i hope he stubs his toe #(/hj but also. not.) #shouting into the void here

[berylgrace]

girl help the anxious bitch is having thoughts of doing things she knows she can’t

#no one: #me: i could totally get on a flight to another country no problem. navigating the airports would cause me no stress #GIRL!!!! WHY ARE U LYING… #my anxiety vs my desire to see all my friends :’) #why are so many of u american. go somewhere else #txt #carrie jules ty leon emel i mean i know none of u are gonna see this anyway #but yk #and more probably I FORGET