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descendantofthesparrow · 3 years

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Commission work - Harry Hook x Darling! Reader - two parter - unpredictably adorable - part 2

commissioner @thebookbakery

Since you were a child, your mind was constantly overthinking, every single possibility, good or bad, bombarding your mind about everything and nothing at the same time.

-what if I never live up to my mom's expectations-

-if I don’t pass this test everyone will hate me-

-they aren’t really my friend; they just feel sorry for me-

-I need to shut up I’m talking to much-

-they are ignoring me; they must hate me-

-everyone is faking-

-if I’m not careful I'll cut my finger and then I'll have to get surgery to remove my hand because I was too careless-

Yeah…it got tiring after a while.

Everything made sense when you were 10 and were finally diagnosed with anxiety, everything got a little bit easier to deal with after that, one of your tactics was just pretending your best friend Piper was talking you down

-I forgot to turn off the oven, and I’m going to burn my mom's house down, and I’m going to go to jail and-

‘no, you didn’t, you always check every single time, twice, you turned it off, now shut up before I smack you, I’m trying to eat this churro.’

It always loomed in the back of your mind, though hanging out with your closest friends did deafen the noise a bit, but it was always there.

You had little toys to help you focus but you were always looked at oddly when you had a little cube with millions of buttons on it so once again, your anxiety won out and you picked at your fingers, bit your lip, rubbed the fabric of your clothes between your fingers, and sometimes dug your nail into your thumb to distract yourself from your own brain.

Crushes, were one of your ultimate weakness, even the thought of someone you had a crush on sent you into a spiral, your brain would tell you they didn’t even know you existed, that they hated you and faking being nice, that your crush would never go anywhere.

Now you only had two crushes your whole life.

One from when you were little, Piper, but that didn’t last long (After you saw her eat a caterpillar bleh) and EX-prince Ben himself, that one had lasted a whole two years, and while you had been his friend before your crush grew, that didn’t stop your brain from shoving those random piercing thoughts into you.

And now, there was another one.

Harry, freaking, Hook. Son of Captain Hook himself, the villain of your mother's story.

And he was the sweetest thing you had ever encountered, you gushed to jane about his little nose scrunched when he grinned, how his tongue poked out of his lips slightly when he concentrated, when he fluffed up his already floofy hair when he was frustrated.

It was just all too much for your anxious little self, it took all your might to keep yourself from bolting away from the handsome pirate.

You sighed, splashing cold water against your face and blindly grabbing for your towel and patting your face dry. You felt your face heat up as you thought back to the day before, in study hall, when Harry ever so gently placed his thumb on your chin to stop you from chewing on your lip.

You let out a long sigh/squeak as you grabbed your bathroom counter and sunk down into a squat, puffing your cheeks as you tried to calm yourself down. “I’m so doomed” you muttered to yourself, this crush on Harry was worse than the one on Piper OR Ben.

With the two aforementioned crushes, you never imagined it going any farther than dating, so imagine your internal embarrassment when one day you realized you were daydreaming about being buried into Harry's side as you slept in on a weekend in your very own place, living together with three dogs and two cats, and four birds, with two guest rooms specifically for Uma and Gil.

It was nice to dream about but once the dark shadow that was your anxiety reared its ugly head and whispered horrid thoughts about Harry’s “true” feelings about you, it was harder to enjoy your daydreams.

-he’s just using me to get revenge~-

-he’s just like his father, a filthy, cheating pirate-

-he’s faking everything-

-he flirts with everyone; I am nothing special-

You knew it was all bullcrap, even your own mother had met harry (at her request) and happily told you that he was nothing like his dad, and one of the sweetest boys she had ever met, even piper and Peter themselves, liked harry.

But like always, your brain never liked to listen to others and always took a darker train of thought.

You shook your head out of thought and stood, walking back into your room and grabbing your bag, slinging it over your shoulder and grabbing your keys, slipping out of your dorm room and locking it behind you, checking twice to ease your mind.

“hey (y/n)” you flinched as you spun around, letting out a sharp sigh as you realized Uma was the one to call out to you, she rose her brow, a small smirk on her face “sorry, thought you heard me walk up to you”

“you-you’re fine” you smiled back, huffing as the girl tossed her arm over your shoulder and started walking with you to the cafeteria.

“hear the rumor that Mrs.Popin is pop quizzing us in algebra today?”

“she is?” you asked, calm as could be on the outside, but once again your mind started running

-what if it's something we haven’t covered yet? Or what if I wasn’t paying attention to the subject?! What if I accidentally check the wrong one! What if-

Uma tugged you into the seat next to her, picking up a clementine and peeling it open, offering you a slice, shrugging as you declined “suit yourself, yeah, I’m wondering how Harrys gonna do, with his problem with numbers after all”

“oh right, his dyscalculia” you muttered, mind now running wild worrying for harry. “I think he’ll be fine, Mrs.Popin is lenient with him, and she lets all of us take the tests over and over again until we get a passing grade”

“yeah” Uma hummed, chewing on another slice “waffles or pancakes today?”

“I heard It’ was French toast~” Harry purred, plopping down next to you and leaning into your space once again, setting your face on fire and cutting off your voice as usual. “you okay (y/n)?” you whipped around to look at Harry with wide eyes, that….that was the first time he had ever called you by your name, it was always your last name.

“I-yes?” you shrugged, looking down at the table and picking at it “I’m fine”

Harry just hummed and leaned away from you, starting a conversation with Uma about the upcoming math quiz.

Your mind whirled as you processed the fact that he called you by your first name. but thankfully it never went anywhere as the bell for breakfast being served rang throughout the room. Uma tapped your arm, hurrying you to the line to grab the hot and ready food before it was gone.

You grabbed your preferred bread and usual toppings, sighing happily as you noticed your favorite drink was in stock this morning. You grabbed the bottle and tossed in on your tray, following after Uma as she went down the sides line, grabbing a handful of bacon for herself.

After dodging the oncoming breakfast crowd, you, Harry, Gil, and Uma finally settled back at your table. Evie, Jane, and Dizzy joining you moments later “morning~” Jane sang, poking your cheek with a ‘boop’ and starting to eat her breakfast. “oh (y/n), the planning committee is needed in the gym later today, about prom n stuff”

“kay” you muttered, quickly going through your slices of French toast and gulping down your drink “still don’t know how I got roped into the planning committee in the first place” you laughed to yourself, you hardly spoke during the meetings, you were more the errand girl and the one who wrote down what needed to happen as everyone else actually planned.

Jane giggled and patted your shoulder, turning her attention back to the conversation of the table, to which you weren’t bothering to pay attention to.

You dug into your bag and pulled out your notebook, going over your previous notes for math to prepare for the quiz later that day.

Sometimes Jane and Harry would bump into you randomly, Harry's fingers brushing your arm when he would reach for something across the table, you did your best to keep the heat from your face.

At some point harry gently probed your shoulder, making you squeak from surprise, unexpecting of the touch as you looked to harry with wide eyes. He gave a soft smile and nodded towards the doors “bell rung for class darlin’, don’t want yeh ta be late” you quickly stood, yelping as your knee bashed against the table.

“ooow” you bent over slightly, palming your knee as you felt the pain bloom across it. “shit”

“wow” Harry chuckled, grabbing your bags and slinging them over his shoulder “never heard yeh swear before darlin’, come on, ill escort yeh” he placed his hand on the small of your back, and lead you toward your first class.

While you appreciated Harry's chivalry, your mind….was not helping.

-everyone is staring at me-

-they are going to think it's odd he has his hand on me-

-everyone is staring at us-

-everyone is going to think it’s weird that Harry is around me-

-EVERYONE IS STAR-

“here we are” Harry thankfully interrupted your train of thought as he handed you back your bag and gestured to your English class “I’ll see yeh later darlin’” he winked at you and strut away, leaving you with your usual burning face and fidgeting fingers.

You sighed, walking into class and hurrying to your seat, ignoring the imaginative eyes on you as you took out your notebook.

The sound of your pen quickly tapping on your clipboard was the only thing that kept you from screaming at everyone.

It was just…too…loud…so many voices at once, all speaking at different volumes and all needing different things, many of them speaking at you, all too much for you to handle.

You gave one look at jane and she nodded, taking your clipboard and walking into the crowd of planners, distracting them as you exited the gym, heading for your room to calm down.

You rubbed your chest and focused on controlled breathing. Everything felt so tight, like something was sitting on your chest as you walked through the halls, fingers gripping your skirt to ground yourself.

You stumbled a bit as a barrage of screaming hit you, you tuned a bit, seeing two of your classmates that you never bothered to learn the names of screaming at each other in the hallway.

Your ears began to ring as you stared at them, unable to continue onto your room. one of the boys looked away from his friend, glaring right at you. “OI WHAT ARE YOU LOOKIN AT!” he screamed, hands balling into fists as he seemed to look into your soul.

You let out a breathless squeak, bolting down the hall, sliding as you took a quick corner and continued to run where ever.

Your original destination was lost, mind yelling at you to hide.

-THEY ARE FOLLOWING ME-

-HIDE-

-THEY ARE GOING TO HURT ME-

-HIDE-

-IM GOING TO DIE-

-HIDE-

You gasped for breath, letting a scream as you slammed into a wall that wasn’t there a moment ago, you slid down to your side, curling up into a ball and letting out choked sobs as the world went dark around you.

You could feel yourself passing out but you couldn’t get a grip on yourself.

You were having a panic attack but you couldn’t do a thing to make it go away, whenever they happened one of your friends was always there to ground you, always helping you come back down to earth.

You couldn’t breathe, air only leaving you as you gasped. Through the ringing in your ears, you heard a voice, but you couldn’t recognize it as whoever it was grabbed onto your shoulders and tried to lift you up.

You felt yourself screech and lash out, your fist hitting something almost solid, whoever it was didn’t flinch and trailed their hands down your arms, grabbing gently onto your hands.

“hey-hey” they whispered, breaking through the chaos of your mind “hey, it's okay, you’re okay. nothings here. you’re safe. no one’s going ta hurt yeh”

You forced your eyes open, and through your blurry visions you saw Harry staring back at you with a soft smile “hey darlin’ can yeh breathe with meh?” you tried to speak but a sob ripped through your throat, you moved forward, crashing into Harry's chest and wrapping your arms around his torso. “hey hey, breathe, in-“ you felt his chest rise, and you swallowed down another sob and took a wobbly breath.

Harry continued to calm you down, soon your breath synchronizing with his “yer doin’ amazing darlin’ now, give me five things yeh can see”

You pulled back slightly from his chest, sniffing as you glanced around “um- locker, window,” a light sob choked you, but Harry just rubbed your back and continued to take deep breathes for you to follow. You glanced down slightly, seeing Harry’s red leather jacket against your shoulder “your jacket, my-my bag, and-and-the school symbol”

“good” Harry cooed, hand running up your back and fingers slipping through your hair, fingers scratching at your scalp comfortably “now name four things yeh can touch”

You looked around again, slowly feeling your body relax, and letting your headrest completely against Harry's chest “wa-water fountain, door handle, vending machine, um-jacket” Harry chuckled at the last one, but nodded.

“amazing love, name three things yeh can hear” you closed your eyes, your lip twitching as you felt your head bump up for a moment.

“your heart” you whispered, not hearing Harrys breath hitch “birds, static”

“a-awesome” Harry sighed, shifting to sit against the wall and pulling you up further into his arms “now, two things yeh can smell”

“metal and leather” you whispered, feeling the grips of the panic attack leaving your body, mentally thanking the gods that Harry had found you.

“good, now, one thing yeh can taste”

You pushed away from Harry’s chest, opening your eyes again and looking around “um-oh! Cookies!” you chirped, leaning up a little as you spotted a bag of Oreos inside the vending machine across the hall.

“amazing job lass, are yeh okay now?” you took a deep breath and looked back at Harry, giving him a tired smile.

“better but” you could still feel the tightness in your chest and your limbs felt like lead “thank you….could you help me to my room? I’m really tired and I need to take a break from everything for a bit”

“of course,” Harry nodded, helping to your feet and grabbing your bag and slinging it over his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you into his side, letting you take your pace as he helped you to your room.

He glared at anyone you passed by, tightening his grip on your waist and even snapping his teeth at Chad as he sneered at you and Harry together. You were too tired to pay attention to anything though, sighing in relief as your room appeared around the corner. Harry dug your key from your bag and quickly unlocked your room, holding onto your hand tightly as you walked into your room and towards your bed.

He released your hand as your knees hit the edge of your bed and you flopped onto the sheets, blowing out a harsh breath as he ruffled his hair.

“so yeh all good?” he asked again, tilting his head at you, you lifted your head and gave a small nod.

“I will be, thank you, Harry”

He gave a grin and walked over to you, kneeling beside your bed “I've got yer back darlin’ get some rest, and I’ll get yer homework from our classes kay?”

“okay” you whispered, flopping your head back on your bed, feeling your face heat up again as Harry leaned over and pressed a kiss to your head “um-Harry?”

“well talk about it when yer right of head love, see yeh later” he stood and walked out of the room, locking your door and tossing the key on your dresser. He smiled at you and closed the door, his heavy footsteps quickly walking away from your room.

You pressed your fingers gently to the place Harry's lips were moments ago, feeling the heat in your face reaching your ears and stretching down your neck.

‘was-he-a kiss?’ you thought, sitting up and staring at the door. ‘he-wow’

You stared at the door for a moment longer before you kicked off your shoes and just crawled under your covers, smiling as you thought back to his kind words and soft lips.

You closed your eyes and took a couple of deep breaths, forcing down the thoughts that said Harry was only being friendly, you could bear to let yourself dream for a bit.

Harry sighed, flipping through the multiple sheets of homework he held in his hands, pursing his lips as he thought back to (y/n), something had set her off to have such an intense panic attack. He was just glad he knew how to calm someone down from it after helping the smee twins through them after so many years.

He looked to his right as Jane passed by him, he reached out grabbing her shoulder, she jumped slightly, looking at him with wide eyes.

“uh, hey Harry? What's up?”

“I came across (y/n) havin’ a panic attack like-two hours ago? Any idea-woah!” Jane’s eyes widened and she grabbed onto his shirt.

“what?! Is she okay? Did-“ Harry quickly covered the girl's mouth.

“she’s fine Jane, she’s in ‘er room now restin’ I just wanted to know if this is a recurring thing or that was the first time it happened”

“recurring” Jane sighed, wrenching Harry's hand from her mouth “she has an anxiety disorder, that’s why she's always so quiet, doesn’t like to draw attention to herself and all that”

Harry furrowed his brows, fixing his bag on his shoulder “ah, is that why she’s all blushy ‘round me then? All those thoughts goin’ wild n stuff?”

“nah” Jane waved her hand nonchalantly “She's just crushing on you….oop didn’t mean to say that!” Jane looked back at him with wide eyes.

A small smile grew on Harry's face “she-she has a crush on meh?”

“I-uh-fudge, yes” Jane sighed, slapping her palm against her forehead “dangit she told me about it in confidence and I just blurt it out like tha-wait!” Harry patted Jane's shoulder with a chuckle and pushed her aside a bit.

“Thanks, Jane~ I gotta go!” Harry took off towards leaving a confused Jane in the hall.

“wait what are you going to do!” Jane yelled, huffing as no response came back “…OH!” Jane squealed, hopping in place. Harry liked (y/n) back! Ohhhh this was going to be so cute!

She had to tell the VK girls, Evie and Dizzy would die!

You sighed, smoothing down the front of your oversized hoodie and further curling into a ball on your bed, sporadically clicking the attack button on your gaming device as you fought one of the hardest mini-bosses of the game.

“come one-, die you-gah!” you seethed, cursing as your weapon broke “again?! goddammit!”

“I have’ta say, it’s weird to hear yeh curse darlin’” you screeched, halfway tossing your switch across the room, the device bouncing off your bed and landing on the pile of pillows on the floor.

You looked towards your door, pressing a hand to your chest as you let out a long sigh “Harry! Geez I’m still calming down from earlier, don’t barge in like that!”

Harry winced, closing the door behind him “sorry love, I brought yer homework and some food fer yeh” he held up his bag and a white plastic bag holding a box of food.

“oh” you felt your face heat up as he stepped closer to your bed “thank you”

“no problem darlin’” he purred, setting the bag of food next to you and tossing his bag on your desk. “so~” he started, leaning closer to you with a sly smirk on his face “I heard something really~ interesting on meh way here~”

You rose your brow and flipped open the box of food, humming at the still steaming (preferred lunch).

“little Janey said yer crushin on meh~” your entire body stopped, it felt like a bucket of ice water had been dumped on you “and before yeh freak out with all those thoughts yeh get” he leaned up, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek “it's not one-sided darlin’ “

You felt your brain short circuit, unable to think ANYTHING as you stared at harry. He chuckled softly and gave you a toothy smirk, his eyes crinkling as he looked at you like he never had before. “Cat got yer tongue love?.I’ll let yeh process it all, but just know, I do like yeh back, and I would jump off a cliff sooner than hurt yeh….” He kissed your cheek again and stood, stopping as you suddenly reached out and grabbed his arm.

“um-I-, I just wanted to say it myself” you muttered, tugging him back down to your side “I-I-I” you stuttered, feeling your face heat up as harry smiled at you with that adorable crinkled nose “ilikeyou” you gasped, grabbing his collar and pulling him towards you, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek and quickly falling back on your bed, pulling your pillow over your face and screeching into it.

Harry just chuckled and patted your knee “like yeh too darlin’ I’ll see yeh later love, okay?”

You just let out some sort of garbled response into your pillow. “okay, text me if yeh want me ta bring yeh dinner” he quickly took his back, emptied your homework from it, and left the room, locking the door behind him.

You let out a huff as you chucked your pillow at the wall, feeling a grin blooming on your face. You squealed, patting your cheeks to try to make the heat escape from it.

“he likes me back” you breathed, giggled erupting from your chest “he likes me back!!!!!” fits of laughter overtook you as you wiggled happily in your bed “he likes me!!!!”

Harry bit his lip to hide his grin as he listened to your mini-celebration “She's so adorable” he chuckled, fixing his bag and walking off, whistling a little tune as he did so.

-end-

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#disney descendants #harry hook x reader #commission work #harry hook descendants #harry hook #harry hook imagine #Descendents #descendants #writing commission

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mauerfrau · 4 years

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One Look

//So, um, I decided I really wanted to flesh out Lily and Thomas more. So I’ve decided to write some short stories about their time together, gradually progressing up to the ultimate climax over time (which I may rewrite when I get to, to better reflect the updates that may arise). Anyways, here’s the first one, of when they first met. Please enjoy, and don’t think too hard about how it all ultimately ends. >.>

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One look. That was all it took. I know, it sounds as though it’s out of a romance novel. But it couldn’t be helped. It only took one look into his soft, hazel eyes to feel the spark of emotions I’d never known before. But perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself.

I was crossing back into my city at a checkpoint along the Wall. I had been out for several weeks on some undercover business in West Germany. Confidential, nothing I can describe, other than to say it was successful, as expected. I was reentering under disguise, as was standard procedure for me. We knew that the borders were closely watched, and we could not tip them off that I had been over there. Our border guards were on the lookout for my fake passport. They wouldn’t know exactly who I was, but they would understand I was important and should only be given a quick, fake search, something that would look normal but reveal nothing. Then I would be let through and could meet my driver further down the street. How could I have expected it to lead to something more?

There were a handful of guards, as usual. Most of them were young, and could only have been on the job for one or two years. There was a supervisor, but he sat on his chair reading a magazine, paying no mind. After reaching the front of the line going in, I was called over to one man. He was the tallest of the bunch, and thin, but not dreadfully so. He had the sort of body that just naturally grew vertically but hardly ever horizontally. He had to be fit under his uniform, but I would not expect his muscles to have a lot of bulk. His hair was dark brown, cropped closely according to standards, but it was still clear he would have wavy hair if it were a bit longer. His nose was long and smooth, to go along with his thin profile. It was his eyes, though, that stood out. Beneath the shadow of his cap, they seemed to sparkle, as though they concealed little candles within them. Surely, it must just be the light, right?

He glanced at my passport and nodded once, understanding instantly what it was about. He opened the briefcase I had handed him and quickly, almost lazily, rifled through the clothes. My documents were concealed in a hidden pouch at the bottom, so no one looking into the case could see them during the “inspection.” He nodded once, closed the lid, and handed it back to me. “Welcome to the German Democratic Republic,” he said. He was smiling, and I couldn’t stop myself from noticing how his teeth were slightly crooked, but just barely so, and not in an ugly fashion. Combined with the now brighter look in his eyes, he looked playful. Despite maintaining my professional demeanor, I couldn’t help but smile back, just a bit. His smile was infectious.

I nodded once, turned on my heels, and strode away quickly. I could feel his eyes lingering on me, but I had to keep from looking back. I couldn’t let myself look back. Well, perhaps one little peek, just to be sure. I glanced over my shoulder. Yes, he was still looking. I snapped my head back around, feeling my cheeks burn, and quickened my pace so I would be out of his sight sooner. I was certain he would forget me as soon as the next young woman passed through the gate. I could not imagine how wrong I would be.

As I sat in the car, I tried to concentrate on the briefing I was about to have. There was much to discuss. I and those reporting to me had uncovered a number of important details about the security systems of West Germany. I needed to be prepared for the long meeting ahead. The quicker I could deliver the info, the sooner I could get out and go home for some much needed sleep. But my thoughts, damn them, kept slipping back to his face. I could see it so clearly in my mind, the way the sunlight hit him just so and revealed a few soft freckles on his nose. I looked out the window and smiled to myself.

The meeting took longer than I hoped. Three hours of bickering between Mielke and Wolf is enough to drive anyone insane. Why Mielke insists on being in on some of this even now I’ll never quite understand. The stout man hated for anything to not be directly under his thumb. I hardly said a word myself after delivering the report, but I still had to sit there through it all. It was cold and the sun had nearly set by the time I walked out. I watched my breath fog in front of me while I routinely bid everyone a good night. I could have had someone drive me, but I declined. I lived within a few blocks, and the walk would be a nice way to clear my head after everything.

I had walked only a block when I spotted a tall, male figure leaning against a tree across the street. I knew right away that he was watching me, whoever it was. I frowned. I of all people shouldn’t be under surveillance, though it wouldn’t be the first time. Even when I hadn’t messed up on anything, sometimes Mielke insisted on having me followed around for a month. He usually claimed it was for “security purposes.” I wasn’t too shocked this would be happening right after I returned from the West. Going against what others would normally do, I marched over to the man, ready to tell him that I was not going to be intimidated and that he would find following me to be difficult. To my surprise, he made no attempt to flee and prevent me from seeing his face. I was shocked when I was able to make out his features under the shadow of his cap. It was the border guard from before, still in his uniform.

“What? You? What are you doing here? You’re a border guard. Or have you decided to try your luck with the Stasi? You’re not doing a good job of hiding, I can tell you that, Genosse…” I glanced at the name attached to his coat. I had missed it before. “Genosse Hartmann.”

He held his hands up in mock surrender, a wide smile on his face. “Can’t a man go out for an innocent stroll after work, Genossin? Perhaps I just happened to be leaning against the tree to catch my breath when you strolled by.”

A frown creased my brow, and my suspicions were raised. “Don’t spew that bullcrap on me. I could have you arrested in minutes if it turns out you’re up to something. Rather convenient that your rest stop is within view of the HVA headquarters, don’t you think?”

His smile vanished and he appeared genuinely distressed. At least he understood the severity of my threat. “No, no, please. I didn’t mean any harm, I…” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked away. He was biting his lip, and his expression mixed fear with sheepishness. “I, er, well, okay, I did come here to see you, but it’s not anything like that, I swear. I, um, well I…I wanted to meet you. Properly, you know?” He suddenly snapped to attention and saluted me. “Genosse Fähnrich Thomas Hartmann, at your service.” He smiled nervously, clearly hoping he had appeased me.

I sighed and nearly smiled back. There was no harm in this man. I wouldn’t send an innocent man like him to jail. His method for meeting me had been poorly executed, but I had to admire him for his courage, and possibly determination, if he had been standing out here for long. “At ease,” I said with a wave of my hand. “I am Genossin Oberstleutnant Lily Beilschmidt, also known as Berlin.” I gestured to the surrounding area. “I am this city.”

A look of surprise came over his face. He blinked a few times and looked around. “I…I had no idea. I…you don’t look like the photos I’ve seen, I mean. And your passport…of course, you must have been under disguise, coming back from the West. I just thought you were an ordinary citizen or agent. I never thought you were Berlin herself. Now I’ve really done it.”

My body and face relaxed with a smile. I chuckled quietly. My hair had been dyed before I left and I came through wearing civilian clothes. I couldn’t expect a stranger to recognize me, even one living here. “Don’t worry, Genosse Fähnrich. You’re not in any trouble, so long as your intentions were innocent enough. What exactly did you set out to do by waiting for me here? More importantly, how did you know I would be here in the first place?”

“Well, I knew you had to be someone kind of important, and probably an agent of some sort, since we were only to give you a show search. And I figured you would be coming here at some point, probably to report to Wolf or someone under him. I just hoped I hadn’t missed you. My shift ended an hour ago. As for what I was doing here, well…” Again, he looked sheepish. His crooked smile had such a charm to it. “I was…hoping to get to know you, I guess. I was hoping you were a pretty, single lady.” He coughed once into his gloved hand and looked away.

It was my turn to look shocked. It wasn’t as though I had never received male attention before. All too often, I had been the object of lust and ogling. But no one had ever come to pursue me in such an innocent fashion. Was this that dream that young girls wanted? Hadn’t I hoped for this once, before receiving a cruel reminder of reality?

I cleared my throat and looked away. “Well, I…I don’t know about being ‘pretty.’ Depends on if you like blondes instead of brunettes.” My hair was currently dyed a light shade of brown. “As for single, well…I suppose I am, but I’m also not. I’m what some would call ‘married to my job.’ And I am the capital of our nation, you know.” I looked down, and then looked back up at him. “I am sorry you’ve wasted your evening. I don’t think I’m what you were hoping for. But your determination is admirable. I’m sure you’ll rise far. Good night.”

I turned to go and had walked several steps when he called out to me. “Wait!” I turned back and watched him trot up. “Wait, please. I…I still think you’re pretty. And I…well, can I at least walk you home? Maybe we can get to know each other. It doesn’t need to mean anything, but I would like to at least talk. That wouldn’t be out of line, would it?”

I stared at him, thinking hard over it. That he was innocent enough was no question. Even if he turned on me, which I highly doubted he would, I would be able to fend him off until police arrived. My place of residence was no secret to anyone with access to Stasi files. Surely, nothing could come of this, and this poor young man would have wasted his whole night. But how often did I receive such genuine attention? Almost never. Was it a sin to want to enjoy it for an evening?

“Alright. You may walk me home. It’d be nice to be around someone who isn’t shouting about one thing or another.” His whole face lit up, and I was struck by the thought that he was, for lack of a better term, adorable. Really? I thought. Adorable? I had never thought of any man as being that. He was handsome, and charming, and he had an air of respectfulness about him. But to think of him as adorable? I must have needed more sleep than I thought.

He offered a hand. “Would you like me to carry your luggage?”

I shook my head. “Sorry. That would be, well, it would go against all my training.” I knew he probably wasn’t up to anything, and all I had in there were clothes and personal items. But it still made me uneasy to think about. He accepted my refusal with a nod and put his hands behind his back. We began to walk side by side. I noted how he kept his strides at just the right pace to stay level with my own, even though his longer legs could have left me behind easily. He began to quietly hum, and when I looked up at him, I could see him looking at me with a smile. I turned my gaze away quickly, perhaps a bit too quickly. At least it was too dark for him to see the blush coming to my cheeks.

“You know,” he said after a few minutes of walking, “you’re not as short as I thought. I don’t know, the pictures made you seem smaller.”

I stopped walking immediately, and I knew he could see my frown under the streetlight. “Genosse Fähnrich, if you’re going to be rude to me, I may just shout and have you arrested for a night. That ought to teach you some manners.”

The smile had disappeared from his face in an instant. “No, no, please don’t. I didn’t mean to insult you, I promise.” He rubbed the back of his neck and shook his head. “I had meant it as a compliment, but I guess it didn’t sound as nice as I thought it would. I’m so sorry. I should just say that you are very pretty and the perfect height for any woman.”

I couldn’t keep the frown on my face, and it gave way to a look of confusion, perhaps mixed with some embarrassment. I had reacted a bit too swiftly, I suppose. I was just so used to my height being a source of ridicule, that my instinct was to shut down any conversation that led to it. What he had said ought to have made me happy, now that I thought about it. And he was being so genuine. I sighed and shook my head. “No, no. I’m…I’m sorry. You were being nice, and I should have seen that. I am just used to being made fun of for my stature.”

His head tilted to the left by an inch and his expression was one of sympathy. “I’m so sorry. I won’t say it again, if you hate it so much.”

I shook my head. “Actually, if you did call me ‘tall,’ it would make me rather happy.” What was I saying? We were speaking as though we might be meeting more regularly.

His smile had returned, wider than before. “In that case, I shall call you ‘tall’ as much as you like. And elegant, pretty, graceful, and as many other fine things as I can think of.”

I could not prevent a smile from coming back to my face as well. However, as we neared the corner of my street, my mood dropped. Reality was hanging over me like an approaching fog. I looked down at the ground until we had stopped by the door of my building.

“This is where you live then?” he asked. He looked at me and looked worried. “What’s wrong? Have I done something?”

“No, it’s not that.” I sighed and messed with the cuff of my sleeve with my free hand. “Listen, Genosse…you’re very nice. A really sweet young man, and I’m sure you’ll make some lucky girl happy, but I…” I couldn’t find the right words as I saw the happy shine in his eyes disappear.

“You’re not interested in me. I understand. I, um…I won’t bother you then. I’m sorry.”

I should have let him go then, and it would have been the end of it. He would have gone off and lived some happy, normal human life. Maybe I would have put in a good word for him to keep him secure. But, I had to say something horrible instead.

“No, no it isn’t that. I think you’re…I do like you, although I don’t know if it’s in that way yet. It’s just…well, I’m the city. And you’re a human. I’ve been told such relationships can be dangerous. It’s usually advised against. So even if I wanted to, I don’t know if we should.”

I could see him mulling over my words until he smiled. “Maybe we can be different. You never know, right? Maybe it was just the times or the circumstances back then.”

I sighed. For perhaps the first time in my life, I couldn’t bring myself to dash someone’s hopes so easily. He was so kind, so genuine. And I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy his company already, far more easily than I did anyone else’s. He must have noticed my hesitation though.

“Look, we don’t have to. I won’t pursue you, if you’re really against it. But I did enjoy this walk together. If you wanted, we could at least just talk together. Perhaps I could take you to lunch. Nothing serious.”

I gave in with a weak smile. “I would enjoy that. I mean, I enjoy your company.” I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, then let my smile grow. “Alright. Let’s get lunch together, and we’ll talk then. I don’t need to work until Monday. Come meet me here on Friday at eleven. Understood?” I said the last part playfully. He returned the jest with a snap to attention and a salute.

“Jawohl.” We both laughed. Then he put one arm behind his back and bowed toward me, holding out the other hand. After looking at it for some seconds and then understanding what he wanted, I slowly put my own hand in his. He kissed the back of it softly. “It’s been an honor walking you home tonight. I can’t wait until Friday. I shall count the days until then.”

I rolled my eyes and shooed him with my hand. “Go on, you poor flirt. Get home before your mother starts to worry.”

He laughed and put his hands behind his back. As he turned and left, there was an obvious spring in his step and he was whistling. He looked back over his shoulder. “I see you’re still watching me leave,” he called, “Missing me already?”

“I’m just enjoying the view,” I replied. He laughed and winked, then continued on his way, as happy as ever.

As I lost sight of him, I turned toward my building and went inside. I was smiling to myself all the way up to my flat, however, the expression and my mood were falling as I approached the door. This had to be a mistake. Not only that some boy could really have a genuine romantic interest in me, despite knowing who I was, but that I was feeling the same in return. I shook my head as I entered and relocked the door before leaning on the wall. I was being foolish to think this was anything but a bad idea. I needed to stop this before it got too far. It was my duty.

And yet, even as I was resolving to let him down gently on Friday, I closed my eyes and saw him kissing my hand again. That sweet smile of his drew out another one on my own lips. It was so pure, and he had meant it for me. Was it so wrong of me to want this? Just once, couldn’t I have what I desired, without some form of approval or test? As long as we were both loyal, who would pay any heed to it? It may yet be over in a hardly a year anyway, when some human girl caught his eye or I proved to be too much for him. Why not just enjoy it for as long as I could and then let him go at the end, each of us a memory for the other to look back on and nothing more.

I looked up at my ceiling. I would go with him on Friday, and simply let things progress as they would. Wherever they took us, it would be nice, and that would be that. I nodded and stood straight, going in to unpack and finally rest. I could have this, just once. What harm could there be in it? What trouble could that one look lead to?

#What If We Could Rewrite The Stars (ThomasxLily)#Read more is only for length don't worry #Also it would be like Lily to threaten arrest twice in one night on the first 'date'

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