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vespersposts · 2 years

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Wildchild [9]

Hi lovelies ⛲,

I hope you are cool and happy, perhaps with your mind already on the holidays, or full of time to devote to your passions. 👒

🌾This chapter no particular warnings, so I will leave you to your reading.

As always thank you for your support and chats in the various pillowtalks and DMs, you are a joy!

💣PS: I apologize in advance for any grammatical and/or spelling mistakes, English is not my first language (bear with me!).

➿Genre: long story, contains angst, fluff and smut parts that will be reported in relevant chapter post.

💮Wildchild Masterlist💮

🔖: @theweasleysrule , @theehcneypot

Ask for tags in DM!

Satsuki's eyes almost glaze over as she looks at you, facing each other, in your perfectly buttoned and pressed uniform, as if it were the first day of school at Too Academy. She smiles at you, speaks softly and squeezes your arm as if you were the love of her life, not Tetsu.

The schoolyard is hot, but the shade of the large trees in the garden gives some relief to both you students and the droves of parents and onlookers who have gathered for the closing ceremony of the course presentation.

You hold her hand and ask her to accompany you to the music club boys,so you can have a few moments alone.

"Why don't we go to the summer fair together? Tomorrow night? Or Sunday, the fireworks will be spectacular this year! Let's put on the yukata, make ourselves pretty and-" she pauses, seeing your gaze lower.

"I won't stay that long, I'm going back to Kyoto tomorrow morning" you inform her, knowing you're disappointing her, once again.

"Move the train" she tells you, clinging to your hand.

"No" you reply simply, loosening your contact to massage your wrist.

"Does it still hurt?" she asks, surprised.

"It will hurt forever, Satsuki, but you can't live believing that something broken can work as new, neither my wrist nor my relationship with Daiki" you sigh.

" There are limits to what I can do, just as there are limits to what I can now be able to feel. No matter how hard I try, I can't go any further this time" you conclude.

"Is it because of how you feel about Akashi or-" the question dies on her lips as she saw you shake your head.

"It's because I don't feel what I felt before, I guess” you tell her, unable to look at her .

You remain silent for a few seconds, then the music club president's voice brings you back to reality.

"Too bad, 'I guess' means nothing to me" Satsuki tells you, under her breath, just before introducing herself to the newcomer.

You hear the applause, see the happiness on the face of the young girl with whom you have just duetted, and reach out to hug her and congratulate her, just as you wish someone had done with you at her age.

You look into the audience and see Aomine's parents applauding you, her father with a big smile on his lips, Natsume raising her hand in a greeting that you return. If only your parents had been even remotely interested in you, maybe you would have been a better person, less shaky.

You follow the guys from the music club backstage, wishing each of them the best, receiving kisses and hugs in return, until his lazy voice reaches you from behind your back, interrupting everyone's chatter.

"If you don't want to be late for your prize, you'd better follow me" he tells you, pointing to an undefined spot behind him, toward which he heads without even waiting for your response, much to everyone's surprise.

" Captain Wakamatsu would have at least waited for me, you know, Aomine-kun?" you inform him, gaining his attention.

"Too bad I'm not him, right?" he smiles at you, stopping, beckoning you with his hand, which he then shoves into his pocket once side by side you reach the stage for the awards ceremony.

You smile with relief at the principal who hands you the award and a bouquet of flowers, because you know the time for departure is approaching.

You entertain yourself for a few more minutes with the students and their parents, shake hands, take photos and pretend to be comfortable, as you were during all those days.

"We're having a party tonight, are you coming? I can pick you up, I have to catch up with Aomine too, anyway" captain Imayoshi's voice reaches your ears as he sits beside you on the dry-stone wall of the lawn, watching the slow flow of the audience.

"Thank you, but I have an early train, I don't think I can make it" you smile at him, placing the huge bouquet of flowers at your side. He adjusts his glasses on his nose and smiles, that half smile of his, that you already know is an omen of bad news.

"I still don't understand if this sweetened, posh version of you is real, or if you've really changed that much" he tells you with a light laugh.

"I don't get the point, senpai. We all grow up, even you are different from how I remember" you tell him, crossing your calfs and swinging your legs as you always do when you are nervous.

"That's true but ... You have really become a different person, even though they have a hard time interacting with you! I didn't expect that" he explains, pointing to the small group of your childhood friends.

"I do what's best for me" you explain, and he again smiles at you.

"Good" he nods, with an expression that says all the opposite, then turning to the young boy who has joined you "Take her to the club tonight, she needs it!" he tells, leaving you alone.

You stand in silence for a moment, until the captain turns away.

"Even the mean glass guy now?" he asks, extending his arm to help you up.

"He’s charming, actually " you admit, retrieving the bouquet and placing it in his hand.

You see him shrug his shoulders and grumbling something about your sanity, you reply with something equally silly, you finish your little scuffle in the school lobby and a moment later you are on the walkway, just like old times.

You look around as you walk back toward the house, as if searching for something, a sign.

Daiki walks beside you with a slow pace, the bouquet of flowers in his arms attracting the attention of a few passersby, who think you are a romantic couple on a first date, glances full of tenderness and curiosity, but also of appreciation for your good fortune.

After all, it's always like that with him.

Stopping at the traffic lights, you catch yourself observing him: his firm, harmonious features, his soft dark hair, those eyes so piercing, his lips so warm that so many times have given you pleasure, his broad shoulders and his strong back that has always given you that special thrill.

It was all so simple before.

That road was taken most of the time at a quick pace, amidst meaningless words, stolen kisses and giggles, with the only purpose of getting home, badly closing the door and throwing yourselves into each other. Every day was a new chance to love each other more, to seek each other out more, to sink even deeper into the intoxication of that all-encompassing feeling, to show each other how important each of you was in the other’s life.

So close that you thought nothing could tear you apart.

"You ok, babe?" he asks, grazing your knuckles with his fingers before taking your hand to walk across.

"Yeah, I got distracted because it's been a long time since I walked this street" you lie, letting him sink his fingers into yours.

"Did you miss Tokyo?" he asks with a slight smile on his lips.

"Of course, it's natural" you reply, feeling his thumb move over your wrist, the pressure generating a mild ache, the reward for that moment of weakness.

"Why didn't you come back earlier, then?" he urges you.

"Because Kyoto is a city that makes me feel I matter, in Tokyo I feel like one of many" you admit, loosening your contact and taking your hands behind your back.

When you reach Daiki's house, the sky begins to tingle with the colours of sunset and a light wind moves the flowers of the lavender bush in Natsume's garden, who runs to embrace you, and to whom you entrust the bouquet of flowers that she arranges in the centre of the pretty table that has just been set.

"My kids!" she tells you all smugly, as she hands you a glass of cold lemonade, and then drags you into her husband's office, who has selected the best of your childhood photo memories for the purpose.

Daiki on the first day of kindergarten, all strutting in his blue apron, his yellow helmet pulled down over his eyes, like a really tough guy.

You and Satsuki ruffled and barefoot in Shinichi's arms, in the garden of that house, still deserted with flowers.

Daiki and Satsuki competing to see who could drink a glass of banana milk faster.

The three of you and Tetsuya in front of the Teiko sign.

Testu and Daiki smiling and exhausted after a championship game.

Daiki lifts up Natsume.

"See how mama's boy? So proud, not even if he was the groom..." his father comments, laughing at his son's embarrassed expression.

"Leave it to those who still have the bod!" you hear the latter snort, who however proudly looks at the photo in question, making you all laugh heartily.

"When he'll be married, I'll cry every day!" his mother recoils, earning a hug.

"Do you understand what I have to put up with? It's always like that, two against one! " his father informs you, shaking his head resignedly.

You smile, flipping through the pages of the album not to ruin everything, even though you already know Shinichi has noticed your sudden change of mood. As soon as the lovebirds leave the room to put dinner on the table, he approaches you, drawing your attention to one picture in particular.

"I've always loved this one" he tells you, taking it out of the album to look at it closely, with a slight smile "It was impossible not to see how close you two were" he adds, handing you the rectangle of photo paper.

You sigh, because you know what he really means.

Two teens studying together, sitting next to each other in a flower garden, that's what you were trying to look like, sure to be skilled enough to keep the truth to yourself.

Too bad that anyone who saw that picture would have understood what you, in those days, thought you were so good at keeping a secret.

Your head on his shoulder, his open hand on your hip, a speech that had brought Daiki's beautiful face to smile at you.

It was only at that moment that you realised how much you sought that kind of intimacy, back then.

It's embarrassing.

You look for something to say in your defence, but your lips remain still as you look at that boy's father, who is waiting for nothing more than confirmation of his wish.

"Well? Are you coming?" young Aomine tells you in an annoyed tone, appearing briefly at the door only to be followed to the garden.

Sitting next to each other, you feel his arm behind your back, just like in the days of the photo.

It has probably become his way over time; after all, he has no reason to be under pressure; he is at home, surrounded by his family.

Too bad the same thing cannot be said about you.

Shinichi's words have weakened you, and now your brain is telling you that you need to do something to show him and his wife how wrong they are, how misplaced their smiling, encouraging looks are, how indifferent you are to the situation, but especially to their son.

You take a bite and smile at Natsume, for it is delicious.

"I can make it for you whenever you want, but you need to visit more often" she tells you softly, filling your glass with cool water.

"I'll try but between classes and foundation activities, I don't have much time" you admit, amusing your nearby man, whose laughter draws everyone's attention.

"Come on" he exclaims in irritation "You have time for all that Akashi equestrian crap and you don't have time to go back home to see your friends? Satsuki chased you for weeks before you bothered to give her an answer, four-eyes has been pestering me all afternoon to have you at the party, but the only thing on your mind is bloody Kyoto!" he concludes, leaning his chopsticks against the rim of the bowl.

"You're right, but your attitude makes it easier to choose" you reply with a hint of nastiness, to which he would like to respond in kind, but which his father's intervention nips in the bud.

"You can consider holidays, I'm sure a few days off would do you good" he smiles, as his wife announces the arrival of dessert.

"That's a good idea" you admit, as you feel Daiki's hand slide away from the chair to reply to a series of messages that have been metronome to your conversation all evening.

"Imayoshi will be here in an hour, I'd better go take a shower" he concludes, taking a couple of mochi for the ride and abandoning the table, noisily pulling back the chair.

Thank heavens, you can finally breathe.

"When he gets like that it's because he wants to draw attention, he's not mad at you, don’t worry!" his mother tells you, slightly moving the plate of sweets for you to take another one.

You smile, accepting the invitation, and grab that soft treat.

"It's my fault, too " you admit. "I went away, focused so much on the entrance exam that I seemed indifferent to them. Even Satsuki told me the same thing, in a better way " you conclude, intercepting Mr. Aomine’s gaze.

"Does the Akashi family treat you well?" Shinichi asks you, taking a sip of tea.

"Yes, they are very nice " you nod. "Seijuro helped me with the admission test and all the practices, he is so mature and responsible. His father is a man who is only outwardly threatening; he even contacted my parents to make sure they understood the importance of the path I was taking, although I don't think they care" you finish with a hint of bitterness.

"They should be very proud, instead" Natsume tells you, ready to listen to your secret.

"Maybe in the future, if I can prove something. We haven't been a family since granny died. She used to keep us together, now my parents are too busy rebuilding their lives, to care about me" you admit "Since he moved to Osaka, my father is always missing, and my mother ... Well ... She ... That is, she's expecting a baby with her partner so..." you conclude, lowering your gaze to the buckram tablecloth.

"So she will have two children to love " Mr. Aomine reassures you, taking your hand.

"I hope so " you say, looking at the empty seat next to you, where Daiki's cell phone is ringing for the third time in five minutes.

"Yoshiko?" Natsume reads, retrieving the phone in time to see yet another call.

"Ah, she. She's the one he's dating. We'd better bring him the phone, maybe it's important, considering how much she bugs!" you huff as the ringer starts for the umpteenth time.

"Thank you honey!" his mother smiles at you, smartly handing you the device.

You leave the adults to their talk and quickly cross the garden and kitchen, finding the staircase to the sleeping area on the left. You clutch the phone in your hand and slowly walk down the hallway to the end, to his room, from where no sound comes.

If he were still in the shower, you could put the phone down on the bed and leave, without taking unnecessary risks.

Standing still on the threshold, you decide to wait for some sound or movement to reveal to you where the recipient is in the process of preparation.

Daiki's room is always the same: meticulously chaotic, colourful, full of clothes abandoned on every flat surface. He has none of his trophies in sight, apart from the last one thrown in the middle of the huge pillow-filled bed, which will probably end up in the same box as all the others.

The only clue to his passion for basketball is the Too jersey, the one he wore during that crucial game and which you had given back him framed, a few weeks later. You had suggested he hang it above his bed, as a reminder of the promise he made to you on the sweet night of that bitter day, perhaps with the secret hope that you would be the first and last to see it.

"As if! " you sigh, disturbed by yet another call that the cell phone in your hands receives. You hear his footsteps move closer, see his tall figure coming out of the bathroom, and thank heaven he is fully dressed.

"Yoshiko!" you inform, waiting for him to reach you at the threshold, though he quickly makes it clear who is in charge, sitting down on the bed and forcing you to join him.

"She'll call back" he smiles, looking up at you.

"You better call her, she's been looking for you for half an hour" you suggest, pointing to the cell phone at his side.

"No " he teases, adjusting the collar of his pale grey T-shirt.

"Have you become that kind of man Aomine-kun?" you ask him, amused by his perseverance.

"The kind who hates to be tracked down? So I was born with it, you should know. You see, the girl you took over, loved when I was a little wild with her, but maybe Akashi wiped your memory too" he concludes, pulling his lips into a smirk.

"Perhaps" you muse, sitting down next to him, taking his phone in your hands and discovering with pleasure that, by typing in your date of birth, you could still have access to all his secrets.

"Let me see what a wild boy does, maybe my memory will come back" you laugh, shaking off hot incoming messages and then the gallery under his astonished gaze, not really paying attention to either, but feeling inside you the satisfaction and need to put him on the spot.

"Listen to my girl Yuka: Aomine-kun is so cool. So tall and handsome wanna... Oh, I see..." you smile mischievously, leaning on his shoulder, showing him on the display the part of the message that you are not going to repeat "She's pretty bold,isn't she? But the question is ... Will she be wild enough? " you ask him, trying to ignore his gaze fixed on your lips.

"You used to do that even before" he tells you quietly "And I used to push you to the edge, but only to finish the game my way. You loved it my way, back then. Do you remember how this game used to end?" he asks you, immediately returning the issue.

You barely nod, as if the question irritates you, but you try actually to hold back your urge to remember.

The phone rings in your hands again, you press the green button and Yoshiko's voice pierces your ears.

"Just a moment, I'll put him through" you tell her softly, forcing him once and for all to take that call. You leave the room and slowly make your way back down the corridor, back up the stairs and stop in the kitchen, where Natsume calls your attention, showing you a large bag full of sweets and food that she gives you as a survival kit for the return journey.

What if you had it all wrong?

What if that was your happy place?

You feel your eyes sparkle and your nose pinch as the woman hugs you tightly, telling you that you are like a daughter to her.

"Don't stay away for so long anymore" she whispers in your ear.

#aomine #aomine x you #aomine daiki x reader #aomine x reader #aomine+daiki #aomine daiki fluff #knb #kuroko no basket #knb x reader #akashi seijuro #akashi x you #akashi x reader #vesperwrites #vesperdreams #vesperfairytales #aomine daiki #the basketball which kuroko plays

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callasdaily · 2 years

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May 9

On May 9, 1974, Callas and di Stefano performed at the War Memorial Opera House in San Francisco.

You might recall that in between the Portland and Vancouver performances di Stefano bounded off to San Francisco. Following the LA engagement as soon as they got to San Francisco he decamped to Las Vegas. He returned at 3 am the night before the concert and he and Maria argued loudly until 6 am. Sutherland states ��there was little hope of Maria being in best vocal form”, the atmosphere back stage was cool, and each drew the other’s attention to the length of applause after a solo.

The San Francisco Chronicle at the time had a noted critic, Robert Commanday, who found Maria’s singing “embarrassing”. He noted a large percentage of the audience was too young to have experienced her in her prime (in fact how many there would have heard her live? - the only other time she appeared in SF was a concert in 1958 and the only cities in North America where she sang staged opera were Chicago, New York, Philadelphia, and Dallas). He acknowledges “…the irresistible Callas excitement was there, her projection of mood and personality unerring…the undefinable ‘It’”. Another critic noted the “glare-to-glare emotions in the ‘Carmen’ and ‘Cavalleria Rusticana’ duets”. He noted the audience ranged from “middle-class people to oddies [his word] like a man garbed in sequins and fiery red and made up to look like a woman, but with a thick dark beard”. I visited San Francisco a lot in the 1970s and it would have been strange if such “oddies” were NOT out in force for Callas.

This photo was allegedly taken at the SF recital. I can see a piano behind Maria, but what is the structure (?) behind it? I suspect Pippo was clipped out of this photo.

#maria callas #opera #classical music

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the-blind-assassin-12 · 3 years

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Undefined Duet

500 followers/ 500 word drabble #13

A/N: Just a few more of these little drabbles to go! They��ve been fun for me to write, so I hope they have been fun for you to read as well. This one follows the Passing Through timeline, when Ryan travels back to Denver to take Max up on his offer to record in his studio, roughly 3-4 months after meeting you in that coffee shop. Thank you @fific7 for the picture prompt!

“Got it, great stuff man!” Max gave him a thumbs up from the booth, then took his finger off of the speaker, the machine clicking.

Ryan rested his guitar on his thighs, nodding in response, a small smile lifting the corners of his mouth. He’d just finished up one of his favorites, and he could still feel it in his chest. That one always feels… good. It wasn’t an original song, but it was one that he’d been playing for years, one that he’d gotten extremely comfortable with. It was also one of the first songs that the two of you had ever played together, and therefore it held an even more prominent place in his catalog than it had before that day on 16th Street. He could still picture you sitting at the painted piano, hands suspended over the keys, tongue poking between your lips as you waited for him to count you in. The memory kept that warm feeling swirling in his chest for a few minutes longer. You’d played it together more than a handful of times since then, but it was always that chilly day that came to mind when his fingers found the chords of that song. Wonder if it’s the same for her.

Max clicked the speaker button once more to let him know that he could take a few minutes between tracks while he made some adjustments to his equipment. Ryan nodded again, a stray piece of hair falling over his forehead as he leaned forward on his stool to set his instrument back in its case. Standing, he lifted a hand to swipe the strands away, reaching for his water bottle with the other. Twisting the cap off, he glanced back up at the booth’s window to catch you watching him. Hey, Junebug.

Smiling around the mouth of the bottle, he drank without breaking eye contact with you. Your cheeks flushed and you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, shrugging your shoulders before releasing the trapped flesh and letting your smile match his. Damn, she’s… He closed the bottle and put it down on his stool. Things between you were still undefined, but he realized then that undefined didn’t mean unsure- that he’d been sure that there was something worth exploring between the two of you since he’d kissed you under the stars in that train car somewhere in the Kansas plains.

He’d been debating which song to play next, going between Southbound and a few others he’d written, but the color in your cheeks and the little scrunch of your nose gave him his answer- Take Me Along, the song you’d helped him finish on your unfurnished living room floor. ‘Course that’s the right one. Ryan cocked his head, motioning for you to join him on his side of the glass. Confused, you furrowed your brow but stood and disappeared from view before the soundproof paneled door opened and you stepped in.

“Hey, what’s-”

“Will you sing with me, Junebug?”

Thank you for reading! If you would like to be added to or removed from the tags please feel free to let me know! :)

Tags: @something-tofightfor @its-my-little-dumpster-fire @suchatinyinfinity @malionnes @thesumofmychoices @gollyderek @pheedraws @beautifuldesastre @alraedesigns @dearmarii @fific7 @traeumerinsworld @obscurilicious @luminex3 @vetseras

#500 word drabbles #follower appreciation #thanks fiona!#fific7 #ryan brenner #photo prompt #ryan brenner in a recording studio #ryan brenner fic #passing through #ryan brenner x you #ryan brenner x reader #ryan brenner x junebug #Jackie and Ryan fanfic #ben barnes characters #undefined duet #ryan brenner's postcard collection

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bloodstained-ballgowns · 3 years

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‘The Morning Show’ rewatch thoughts: Part 1

I started rewatching The Morning Show in preparation for season 2 in September and I think the halfway point is a good point to scream some thoughts into the void. Spoilers for eps 1-5.

One of my personal favourite storytelling techniques is something I like to call the ‘impartial camera’, and this show uses it so effectively while handling really sensitive and volatile subject matter. The basic key to the ‘impartial camera’ in my book is that it forces the audience to make up its own mind because nothing is clear cut. There are no heroes and villains, all the characters are on the same playing field, and their actions are more being broadcast to the viewers instead of framed in certain lights. Like this show definitely has an agenda, is definitely pushing a certain narrative, but it lets the audience work through the nuances in that narrative in their own minds with everything unspoken onscreen rather than completely spelling it out for them. For example, I would say that the camera doesn’t condemn Mitch Kessler, Mitch Kessler condemns himself through his actions and his words that are shown onscreen, if that makes sense.

That being said, it’s not like the camera is just floating around. I really like a lot of the camera work here because you can tell that the direction is very purposeful while getting really personal. You definitely feel like you’re inside a character’s head when they’re at the centre of a scene.

Why has Jennifer Aniston acted in so many crappy romcoms when she can do stuff like this? She’s so good here! The acting overall is great, if a little melodramatic at times (seriously, everything is pretty much at a screeching ten, 100% of the time), but that’s partly a symptom of this crazy journalistic celebrity world where no one means what they say and everyone has a thin skin and keeps their knives sharp. Maybe melodrama is just what that world is like.

Alex Levy is superficial and insincere and selfish and such a good character. She’s a professional (in that her job is her life, not that her tantrums are workplace appropriate, but oh well) and ambitious woman who is a complete bitch, a prejudiced feminist, and literally the embodiment of that “well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions” meme. Her power grabs are pretty pathetic and she has no idea what she’s doing most the time (mood) but it seems to work out for her okay mostly so I’ll give her that.

BILLY CRUDUP OH MY GOD. He’s like lightning whenever he’s onscreen, it’s amazing. Cory is probably my favourite character as well because he’s so undefinable, everything you expect and everything you don’t at the same time. His and Bradley’s friendship(?) is also fascinating and so heartening. I think they mesh so well because to viewers, they both seem like outsiders, and they definitely see that in each other too. I think they are the only characters who are ever fully, truly honest with each other. I hope season 2 doesn’t drastically change their dynamic.

I love Claire. I just really love Claire. Part of me wishes I was more like her.

Mia irritates me but you know what at least she’s good at her job (unlike some people *cough* Chip *cough*).

As long as Yanko gets to keep his eyeliner in season 2 we’re good.

I relate to Bradley on a deep level because she says what she means and gets annoyed when other people don’t do the same.

“What the fuck is going on right now.” “I don’t know but it’s weird and fascinating and I’m super into it.” Yanko and Daniel are me while watching Cory and Alex duet lmao.

Alex’s whole monologue to her daughter in the taxi about women and power fell flat to me because a) the reason the network isn’t giving her more power isn’t because she’s a woman (for once), it's because she uses that power, when she has it, entirely as a weapon for selfish means and as a slave to her very volatile emotional state, b) Alex’s ‘feminism’ is very self-serving so I don’t care and c) it was so cheesy. I liked Bradley’s one in the department store to Cory about women and media though, that was good.

“Maybe you just have to lose it sometimes for people to take you seriously.” Debatable but it worked for Alex so...

“You sound like an ice cream flavour” She’s not wrong, Chip.

“I’m one of those strange men who only likes sleeping with women who are actually attracted to me.” askjddhjksndsk i’m still torn as to whether cory wants bradley in that way because no she’s not attracted to him and he seems to find her fascinating instead of alluring and they gel really well friendship-wise but then i feel like that’s exactly the kind of person he would fall for idk i have no idea where anything is going in s2

‘The Morning Show’ rewatch thoughts: Part 2

#the morning show #alex levy #bradley jackson #cory ellison #mitch kessler #jennifer aniston #reese witherspoon #billy crudup #impartial camera #apple tv #my post

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beck-a-leck · 4 years

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I just spent like 30 minutes trying to find an old post I'm pretty sure I made about a Star Wars/Prince of Egypt AU I wanted to see 100% because I needed Anakin and Obi-Wan singing The Plagues at each other.

Apparently I didn't tag it, so it's lost forever.

Anyways.

I had a toothbrushing epiphany as to how part of that would ideally play out. (Bear with me, i think this idea is actually better suited for something visual like gifs or art and not writing, but my only tallent is words so... i'm trying something here)

We have the song line "This was my home" speaker undefined, if singing is happening, its Anakin and Obi in a duet. Show an image of the destroyed Jedi Temple.

Cut to Obi-Wan's voice, solo, as he surveys the damage "all this pain and devastation..."

"... how it tortures me inside" Anakin on Mustafar, with the tears rolling down his cheeks.

Cut back to Obi-Wan's voice saying "all the innocent who suffer from your stubbornness and pride" over images of jedi and the younglings, padme, ahsoka, rex and other clones.

#empty chairs at empty tables #does this make any fukin sense?#idfk i wish i could draw or could be bothered to learn how to edit gifs #the thought just hit me and then made me sad #and I am obligated to share the sads when I find them #star wars #maybe one day I'll write that fic #but honestly i don't think the music would translate well #and like that's the only reason to do a crossover with a musical is for the music #also while i was digging through my tag I found my obi-wan post #from like april. that one hurt too

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all-the-kookies-fall · 6 years

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A THEORY: Linear Timeline of reputation

This is going to be a very long read; but it may just include unlocking the 15 Taylor's from the LWYMMD MV so read on if you dare…

(OK it totally includes the theory, please read and tell me what you think!)

An Introduction:

I've been a casual fan of Taylor Swift since she started. Loved all her radio singles, listened to her albums (at my leisure upon release), and admired her platform and brand image. I guess I became a huge fan after 1989, but around the release of reputation, I realized just how much this woman's music has been there throughout my life and decided to fully stan her. As I fell down the rabbit hole of learning everything I could about TS as an artist, I became completely enamored with her wits & charms. However, the more I learned to love about her, the more I could feel just a slight inauthenticity; I was constantly thinking of the hypocrisy of how she "never names who her songs about" yet she created this scavenger hunt with her liner notes that seemed to point in an obvious direction of one of her "ex-boyfriends." It didn't align with how she presented herself in every other aspect. Then, I felldowntherabbithole for real and found all of the incredibly documented and organized realm of the Kaylor's, and everything was literally in screaming color.

reputation made even more sense with fresh Kaylor eyes and once I read this Taylor Swift quote:

reputation, in my mind, is an album that is very linear in it’s timeline. Meaning that it kind of starts out where I was when I first started making the record. The album ends more where I am now in my life. So this is more towards the end of the album, it’s called ‘Call It What You Want.’

my mind became OBSESSED with cracking this code. I had combed through all the kaylor blogs and while I had read everything I could, I still couldn't place it within any timeline. Then, Delicate came out and the code started to crack; I could peek inside and make sense of something, but was still unsure what it was. I put together a loose concept which had some plot holes, but it was when I remembered to revisit the 15 Taylor theory that everything completely revealed itself.

I would like to start with a disclaimer: I have never, ever actively participated more than lurking or even posted anything on Tumblr. I would like to fully acknowledge that there is a huge, fat chance none of this makes sense to anyone but me, but my husband was really getting fed up with me talking about it and I just needed to share. THANK YOUS to the Kaylor blogs I frequented with incredible analysis and POV of Tay in the media and her music- @all-my-possessions @howyougetthenerd @jennyboom21 @karlitakloss @kaydar @kaylorrepdetective @larrienation @out-of-the-klosset @paradisekisses @tallcurlygirl @taytaysbeard @that-curly-haired-lesbian @thoseflashinggreeneyes @whaler13bg to name a few. (Sorry, tumblr is not letting me tag a few of you.)

A lot of the information I am providing is not new and connects the dots from the amazing posts from this community. I tried as best as I could to cite all relevant posts - you can definitely let me know if I've made any errors. Please feel free to edit//contribute//comment because I have a feeling that a more seasoned eye would be able to expound on so many more clues and easter eggs!

Let the Games Begin!

Overall Concept/Themes

There are truly some insightful analysis of the overarching themes and concepts of the album already. Secrecy, partners in crime, forbidden love… In general there's a complex theme of Duality to the album; conflicting feelings, Brand vs Self, bad vs good, truth vs reputation etc. I think it's most important to note is that any analysis that views these tracks differently than listed below, can still be correct. Our Queen is a lyrical master plus there's that added layer of intentional dualities in her story telling; there's always at least 3 different meanings to her songs and that's one of the reasons we admire her wordsmith ways.

The Timeline!!!

…Ready For It? - So It Goes… 2012* - 2014

This has long been inferred in every side of the fandom to indicate this is Part 1 of the Story, implied by the ellipses as the beginning and end of the track names. All the timelines I've previously read started at either the introduction of 1989 or even later beginning with 2016/2017 events, but it didn't make sense applied to the album as a whole. Once Delicate MV came out, I began to notice that all of the nods to RED in all these MV's were not just for nostalgia. She is literally telling us that this part of the story was about the end of RED era leading into 1989 - not quite 1989 era just yet. ;)

*2012 is an estimate based on the beginning of the Delicate video; it's possible that TS & KK met before Swiftgron was officially over but who will ever know? Karlie's buzz cut was December 2011 (x). The first half of the album is difficult to theorize specific dates within this period because we really have no idea when KK & TS met.

LWYMMD - New Year's Day 2014 - 2017 (NYD)

I gotta tell you - immediately after reading this, go watch LWYMMD. It was (is?) literally hiding there in plain sight; it's a GENIUS video walking you through EXACTLY what she did (you could say from a satirical standpoint more how the media/GP thought she did) to prepare for this era! When she refers to the "Old Taylor," she's using the term in the exact way her fans have been using: to refer to Country Taylor. She is officially Pop; Look What We Made Her Do when RED, a pop-country album, "a patchwork of songs," didn't win the Grammy. She went full POP princess. This post in particular helped me remember that these songs are not fresh in regards to her life even though they are brand new to us. Part 2 of the story more clearly follows the events of the 1989 era through just before rep's release.

Track by Track // 15 Taylors

…Ready For It? Intro

I believe this is an introduction of what's to come, an overview of the story. Yes, she's definitely asking herself if she's ready to come out of the closet (x/x), if Karlie is ready to glass closet (x), is her beard ready for the consequences(x), and most specifically, are we, her fans, the GP, are we ready for her to come out and live her truth unapologetically? It's her laying the groundwork to prepare for 1989; her literally coming up with the concept for the whole era which is why we see the references to her 1989 MV's in the glass room. This post cites the connection to the Dykes on Bikes; are we ready to accept Taylor to not only come out, but be a strong voice and activist of the LGBTQ+ community?

End Game April 2013 - June 2014

I KNOW Taylor is singing to KK about them first meeting - and I KNOW we think they just met before VSFS 2013 (even though there are rumors that say they met sooner…) But, hear me out because this lines up way too easily with the information we get from the MV (x/x). Remind yourself… Who opened for Taylor's RED tour? That’s right, our favorite ginger. It's a nice additional nod with the callback of Everything Has Changed duet with Ed Sheeran. Miami (shoutout to my hometown even though I have no inkling to its significance) tour dates were 04/10/13, London was 02/01/14 (Did she really show us their first NYE together?!), and Tokyo was 06/01/14.

Irrelevant now but important for later (LWYMMD): And I bury hatchets, but I keep maps of where I put ‘em. This post highlights a cool interpretation of the line that applies to this whole post!

I’ve been doing some digging to try and somehow link Miami in this mix, and this is pure speculation but I feel like Future represents her bearding with Harry Styles. Karlie’s “buzz cut” was in December 2012, and shortly thereafter she was in Miami for a photo shoot. 1/4/12 marks the official break up of Haylor in the US Virgin Islands… it’s a stretch and I’m totally grasping at straws but they are geographically close and it’s all I got for now.

"Me, I was a robber first time that (s)he saw me…"

I Did Something Bad early 2013

So, I have to admit… IDSB and DBM were the two songs I was having the most trouble placing within the linear timeline; my initial thought was this must have been a metaphor for her confessing her "sins" a.k.a. bearding, to Karlie when they first started dating. This was the song that clicked once I looked through the lenses of the 15 Taylors and reaffirmed my thoughts with the visuals of this Taylor on the cross in LWYMMD. In digging a little deeper, I found a Vanity Fair article - one of the only cover stories found online about TS during 2013. I'm not as confident about my perspective on the linear timeline with this track, however I feel like it's a good start especially considering the next holy church track.

In regards to the "light me up" lyric, and clear visual reference in the …RFI MV as well as the crucifixion of Taylor in LWYMMD, I thought this answer she gave the 73 Questions With Taylor Swift | Vogue video was also interesting to note. The question was what is the one thing she wishes she would have known at age 19 (8:03)?

"Hey, you're going to date just like a normal 20-something should be allowed to, but you're going to be a national lightning rod for slut-shaming."

I'll leave this quote from the April 2013 Vanity Fair interview right here:

"But nobody calls them the kinds of names that get thrown at Swift. “They’re ‘playboys,’ ” Swift says wryly. “They’re ‘having fun.’ ”

By the way, in the Vanity Fair article there's an "authorized source" giving insight to what "really happened" to Haylor aka probably lies.

Every lie I tell them, they tell me three

Don't Blame Me early - mid 2014

I can really only hypothesize through the lyrics and the Taylor line up that this may be a reference to how the RED "media" circus (as quoted from the VF article cited above) literally made her do crazy things - maybe how her past experiences had caused her to react a certain way in an undefined relationship, maybe how the media circus in general had her guarding her heart, and of course the religious context of the song leads me to believe of course it is connected in that aspect to the confessing of her actions in the previous track. Big Sur trip also falls within this timeline. (x/x/x)

I once was poison ivy, but now I'm your daisy…

Delicate 2013 - 2014

I think this one has so many beautiful analysis with the music video that syncs perfectly with this time line with no need for additional explanation, and I think it's especially apparent why this Taylor represents TraKK 5 in the line up. (x/x)

It's interesting that Fearless Taylor and Red Taylor were the ones actually fighting on Taylor Mountain in the LWYMMD MV; this may be a reference to her insecurities and headspace during the RED media circus//break up anxieties fighting contrasting to her want to just dance in her best dress Fearless with KK with no inhibitions.

Dancing in my best dress, fearless

LWYMMD End of 2014

Has anyone noticed the crows in the beginning? It literally hit me as I was finishing this post - a group of crows is called a murder.

We see her Driving a new Maserati (well, car with significant meaning) down a dead end street and then crashes into the pole. (x) She literally killed the "Old Taylor" to get the Grammy - as well as set up clever disguises as red herrings* so that we missed the most obvious clue that this is about the release of 1989. I think even cleverer, how she walks away from the crash unscathed at the end of the MV to imply she rose up from the dead, she does it all the time (with each era release). (x/x/x/x)

*Red herring: something, especially a clue, that is or is intended to be misleading or distracting. In reference to the post regarding hatchets in End Game, she's definitely sending us on the hunt… remember that post above I asked you to note?

Then of course another hint to the timeline is in the lyrics and MV (look at the date of the tweet...)

I've got a list of names and yours is in red underlined

So It Goes… October/November 2014

This was definitely the most challenging to figure out, but there's definitely two clear ideas that are represented here - the linear timeline alludes to the HOT KINKY SEX our girls probably had after VSFS '14 (x/x/x) and the death of her 'innocence.' Coincidentally, I had read Slaughterhouse Five for the first time earlier last year and lurking around the Reddit TS community where they spent so much time trying to figure out how they could circle this back to Vonnegut. Unluckily for them, it is the most heteronormative//homophobic community where even Kaylor posts are censored/deleted/ridiculed etc so they weren't ever going to get it. This song represents a toxic relationship with CH in their eyes, and I can see that perspective… another Salute to the American Queen of Wordplay.

Anyway, here is a quote from a NY Times (https://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/18/books/review/and-so-it-goes.html)

That is, the constant repetition of “So it goes” makes readers ask themselves about the meaning of death (or its lack of meaning) and the incalculable human costs of war.

The 2009 VMA's Taylor is the epitome of everything her art, brand and music spoke to prior to 1989; and with the Pop princess she was no longer the relatable girl next door. She had gone full big-city, celebrity friends, glitz and glam - feeling so Gatsby for that whole year. With 1989, represented by the LWYMMD music video, that image was shattered, it was the death of her reputation but the true beginning of laying the groundwork for her and KK's future and she truly felt alive.

Not to mention a song about kinky sex is a huge step away from that image.

So it goes...

And so it goes, now Part 1 of our story is done.

Gorgeous Met Ball 2015

Part 2 moves into the 1989 era starting with the Met Gala. (x/x) I read a great analysis using the lyrics to prove why this song is not about someone you just met because of the intense conflicting feelings. (I have scoured Tumblr to find it and link it but can't rediscover it… sorry I explained I've been a noob and a lurker and I never liked or reblogged anything, I'll update with a link if I ever find it again!) That made me reevaluate my original thoughts of this track being Enchanted 2.0 and representing her meeting Karlie for the first time. This was the first public event Kaylor attended together; it must have been strong conflicting feelings of joy & giddiness of the relationship quickly overtaken by nerves, fear, and anger that she would be found out and/or couldn’t show any outward PDA towards KK at the event. I would imagine there was a lot of drinking that night to cope, thus the “drunk” perspective.

PS she probably didn’t go home alone that night (DING)😉

'Cause you're so gorgeous it actually hurts

Getaway Car May - August 2016

There are great analysis looking at this song from two main POV's- 1. the bearding CH-TH circus(x/x) and 2. a reflection of Swiftgron in hindsight (x). For the sake of the timeline/15 taylor line up, it was too coincidental that this was the Taylor snapping at the beards in I <3 TS shirts and from that perspective, fits perfectly into the linear timeline. It is suspect that TS went against her management in anger of how the "break up" with CH unfolded, and so it would make sense to be a little apologetic towards TH -- the one beard aftermath she may have regretted but that is just pure speculation.

And a circus ain't a love story, and now we're both sorry

*I JUST NOTICED! She POPS HER LEG for the 7th boyfriend in line - AKA CH. She is SO EXTRA!

King of My Heart August 2016

The below quote and Taylor line up don't need further explanation.

"I think it’s very interesting when people talk about their love stories. Like when you guys blog about, “my and my husband, me and my boyfriend” or just anyone talking about how they fell in love.

There seem to be these very definitive phases. It doesn’t matter how long that phase lasts. There seems to be a moment where you know it transitioned to the next phase. People will be like, “Oh my God, we were friends for six years and there was this moment and we knew and then it changed. Then there was a moment and it got even deeper. Then there was a moment and we knew” or like “I saw this person and there was this moment and we knew.” Everyone has a different story with how they connect with someone else and what i find interesting is the moment where it switches. You always hope that switch is going to move forward and not backwards because it can happen either way. I always wanted to structure the song where each individual section of the song sounded like a move forward in the relationship but still being listenable. So I wanted the verse to seem like it’s own phase of a relationship, the pre-chorus to sound like it’s own phase of a relationship, and the chorus to sound like it’s own phase of a relationship. I wanted them to all have their own identity but seem like they were getting deeper and more fast paced as the song went on. So finally I was able to achieve that in a song.”

Here’s a couple of my favorite analysis regarding this song. (x/x)

Up on the roof with a school girl crush

Dancing With Our Hands Tied Mid - End 2016

This analysis really explains the lyrics and matches the allusion of the Zombie Taylor to make it seem like it is a hindsight song about Swiftgron; however Out of the Woods is the last MV of 1989 era released the end of 2015 (aside from New Romantics your video) and this can perhaps be expressing the death of Taylor’s 1989 reputation after the slew of public feuds. It can also be interpreted as a hindsight song in regards to Kissgate in 12/2014(x/x); how she had found herself coming into 1989, but was a zombie version of that because she had to beard with CH and TH and it perhaps made her feel dead inside. Maybe she’s implying that she would have just taken the fall from grace then put herself through another (particularly long and grueling) fake relationship.

I had a bad feeling

Dress October 2016

Not only is Dress pretty frequently analysed, it's also the most obvious and blatant within the theory. I thought it was very cute that this was represented by the Ballerina in the line up as a not so subtle nod to Karlie. October 2016 was the infamous Golden Tattoos at Drake's birthday party. (x/x/x)

Made your mark on me, a golden tattoo.

Sorry I couldn’t help myself with this gif :P

TIWWCHNT November 2016

Originally, I thought this was the easiest one- yes, the Snake Queen is sipping and serving tea on her infamous feuds however it just didn't fit in the more transparent timeline of the second half. There's been a few posts that hint the track may be a slight diss to her fans. Once it hit me she was alluding to herself as our (the fans) American *dream* Queen, I realized: this song is not a slight diss - it is harshly directed to us, all of us. Hear me out: Just like KOMH is about a love that reflects back on different periods in life, this track also calls to a couple different conflicts with the relationship of TS and her fans. She's never enough for either aspect of the fandom.

I thought it was curious that she would have the "ET TU BRUTE" (x) as a reference to Kanye because let's be honest, she probably never trusted him after 2009 and rightfully so. "Et tu, Brute?" is a Shakespeare reference and a phrase that is now used to describe a friend stabbing you in the back. This would be more applicable to us, her fans. V1:

It was so nice throwing big parties

Jumping to the pool from the balcony

Everyone swimming in a champagne sea

And there are no rules when you show up here

Bass beat rattling the chandelier

Feeling so Gatsby for that whole year

This easily refers to 12/2014 - Kissgate. Feeling so gatsby for that whole year; throwing big parties. She had to close the gate before she was outed prematurely by the fans watching her during the concert. We were the last ones she ever expected having to protect herself from; she had been so open, glass-closeting, but the fans took it too far and crossed the line of her privacy. She was surprised by the network that had expanded to track her every move. A couple years pass, V2:

It was so nice being friends again

There I was giving you a second chance

Think back to the election of 2016; Taylor being back in the media and more open again with her life wasn't enough at this point. America had reached a boiling point and everyone had to pick a side; even Taylor's most dedicated fans were constantly expressing their disappointment at her so she changed her priorities and went into hiding.

As @paradisekisses once posted, “Not everything is about Kanye.”

Salute to you, our American Queen of Red Herrings

Because you break them, I had to take them away.

Call It What You Want End of 2016

The lyrics all harken to 1989 (x) and this is when her reputation has never been worse (again), but she’s stronger this time and it didn’t break her as much as post RED era. Not to mention, she’s madly in love and found her end game so nothing else really matters to her; her priorities have been shifted and she knows what truly matters in her life.

Call her what you want, she is Karlie's Partner in Crime. it's an obvious call to the gold cage, hostage to my feelings; she will jail herself once more with this ((hopefully)) last beard and that will be the official death of (2.0? 6.0?) Old Taylor. The best part is the BTS video showing how much fun she was actually having in the gold cage. There are beautiful analysis of this song (x/x/x/x/x) , and to me it's just the most real/pure love song. Love isn't just about all the good times, it's how your partner and you navigate the bad. Sometimes the worst moments in life show us just how strong our relationships are and bring us closer together.

Karlie what you want, call her what you want to (I can't unhear this in the background now <3)

New Year's Day January 1, 2017

This Taylor is hidden from us because she will probably never be as open with the GP, media, or her fans ever again. Who knows what to come in the future, but she actively tells us "don't read the last page" and to "hold onto the memories." Ugh, this is making me tear up -- I just officially joined the fandom!! Don’t tell me this is it already... (x/x/x)

This post highlighted the importance of the sunshine necklace with Taylor's obvious sarcasm in the BTS in saying “It’s really important to wear subtle jewelry in music videos, I’ve learned.” (If anyone can forward the gif I’d love to add it to the post :))

Sidenote: technically, isn't this another closet she's in during the rep era?

Wear you like a necklace…

And I will hold on to you...

I had so much fun putting this together and being inspired by all the amazing perspectives the Kaylor fandom has been churning! Hope you like it :) Let me know your thoughts!

#kaylor #gaylor swift #reputationtimeline

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nottooldforthisship · 6 years

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People do not always marry their soulmates. People do not always fall in love with their soulmates. It's not always love. It's often love. What people do is orbit their soulmates, for good or bad. A binary star system, an unwitting duet, your melody their harmony for the rest of your lives. These are all true, as far as Louis can tell, as far as anyone knows. As far as his mum told him, over and over and over again, fast and insistent and worried, on the days he’d come back from school and put on music so loud it drowned out everything else. There’s no single path forward from the connection, no truth other than the truth that the person whose words you carry is out there, an undefined something that you’re going to have to deal with. In whatever way you can possibly deal with meeting the stranger who's always been there, and always been missing.

Make Your Words A Weapon , by @helloamhere

#mine #quote #currently reading #HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS IS SO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD #oh my #you have a special way with words dear author #fic rec

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outfitandtrend · 2 years

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#FASHIONSTUDIO

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vespersposts · 2 years

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Wildchild [9]

Hi lovelies, another week is gone and before I melt under this cruel summer sun, let me post this new chapter.

This is free from any restriction, hope you are gonna enjoy it.

Thank you so much to everyone who's reading and commenting, if you have any feedback please leave me a message, it'll help me grow as author.

🎟 Chapters Masterlist 🎟

1+2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8

🔖: @storyhuntress13 , @theweasleysrule , @theehcneypot

Love always,

You hold her hand and ask her to accompany you to the music club, so you can have a few moments alone.

"Why don't we go to the summer fair together? Tomorrow night? Or Sunday, I hear the fireworks will be spectacular this year! Let's put on the yukata, make ourselves pretty and-" she pauses, seeing your gaze lower.

"I won't stay that long, I'm going back to Kyoto tomorrow morning" you inform her, knowing you're disappointing her, once again.

"Move the train," she tells you, clinging to your hand.

"No" you reply simply, loosening your contact to massage your wrist.

"Does it still hurt?" she asks, surprised.

"It will hurt forever, Satsuki, but you can't live believing that something broken can work as new, neither my wrist nor my relationship with Daiki" you sigh. " There are limits to what I can do, just as there are limits to what I can now be able to feel. No matter how hard I try, I can't go any further this time" you conclude.

"Is it because of how you feel about Akashi or-" the question died on her lips as she saw you shake your head.

"It's because I don't think what I felt before is still right for me, I guess” you tell her, unable to look her in the face.

You remain silent for a few seconds, then the music club president's voice brings you back to reality.

" 'I guess' means nothing to me" Satsuki tells you, under her breath, just before introducing herself to the newcomer.

You follow the guys from the music club backstage, wishing each of them the best, receiving kisses and hugs in return, until his voice reaches you from behind your back, interrupting everyone's chatter.

" Captain Wakamatsu would have at least waited for me, you know, Aomine-kun?" you inform him, gaining his attention.

"Too bad I'm not him, right?" he smiles, stopping, beckoning you with his hand, which he then shoves into his pocket once side by side, you reach the stage for the awards ceremony.

You smile with relief at the principal who hands you the award and a bouquet of flowers, because you know the time of departure is approaching.

You entertain yourself for a few more minutes with the students and their parents, shake hands, take photos and pretend to be comfortable, as you were doing during all those days.

"We're having a party tonight, are you coming? I can pick you up, I have to catch up with Aomine too, anyway" Captain Imayoshi's voice reaches your ears as he sits beside you on the dry-stone wall of the lawn, watching the slow flow of the audience.

"Thank you, but I have a very early train, I don't think I can make it" you welcome him, placing the huge bouquet of flowers at your side. He adjusts his glasses on his nose and smiles, that half smile of his, that you already know is an omen of bad news.

"I still don't understand if this sweetened, posh version of you is real, or if you've really changed that much" he tells you with a light laugh.

"I don't get the point, senpai. We all grow up, even you are different from how I remember" you object, crossing your calfs and swinging your legs as you always do when you are nervous.

"I do what's best for me" you smile, and he again smiles at you.

"Good" he tells you with an expression that says all the opposite, then turning to the young boy who has joined you "Take her to the club tonight, she needs it!" he comments, leaving you alone.

You keep silent for a moment, until the captain turns away.

"Even the mean glass guy now?" he observes, extending his arm to help you up.

"He’s charming, actually " you admit, retrieving the bouquet and placing it in his hand.

You see him clutching it in his shoulders and grumbling something about your sanity, you reply with something equally silly, then the both of you finish your little scuffle in the school lobby and a moment later you are on the walkway, just like old times.

You look around as you walk back home, as if searching for something, a sign.

After all, it's always like that with him.

Stopping at the traffic lights, you catch yourself observing him: his firm, harmonious features, his soft dark hair, those eyes so piercing, his lips so warm and so naughty, his broad shoulders, the long muscular arms and his strong back that has always given you that special thrill.

It was all so simple before.

So close that you thought nothing could tear you apart.

"You ok, babe?" he asks, grazing your knuckles with his fingers before taking your hand to walk across.

"Yeah, I got distracted because it's been a long time since I walked this street" you lie, letting him sink his fingers into yours.

"Did you miss Tokyo?" he asks with a slight smile on his lips.

"Of course, it's natural" you reply, feeling his thumb move over your wrist, the pressure generating a mild ache, the reward for that moment of weakness.

"Why didn't you come back earlier, then?" he urges you.

"Because Kyoto is a city that makes me feel I matter, in Tokyo I feel like one of many" you admit, loosening your contact and taking your hands behind your back.

Daiki on the first day of kindergarten, all strutting in his blue apron, his yellow helmet pulled down over his eyes, like a real tough guy.

You and Satsuki ruffled and barefoot in Shinichi's arms, in the garden of that house, still deserted with flowers.

Daiki and Satsuki competing to see who could drink a glass of milk faster.

The three of you and Tetsuya in front of the Teiko sign.

Testu and Daiki smiling and exhausted after a championship game.

Daiki lifts up Natsume.

"See how mama's boy? So proud, not even if he was the groom..." his father comments, laughing at his son's embarrassed expression.

"Leave it to the one who still have the bod!" you hear the latter snort, who however proudly looks at the photo in question, making you all laugh heartily.

"When he'll be married I'll cry every day!" his mother recoils, earning a hug.

"Do you understand what I have to put up with? It's always like that, two against one! " his father informs you, shaking his head resignedly.

"I've always loved this one" he underlines, taking it out of the album to look at it closely, with a slight smile "It was impossible not to see how close you two were" he adds, handing you the rectangle of photo paper.

You sigh, because you know what he really means.

Two teens studying together, sitting next to each other in a flower garden, that's what you were trying to look like, sure to be skilled enough to keep the truth to yourself.

Too bad that anyone who saw that picture would have understood what you, in those days, thought you were so good at keeping a secret.

Your head on his shoulder, his open hand on your hip, a speech that had brought Daiki's beautiful face to smile at you. It was only at that moment that you realised how much you sought that kind of intimacy, then.

It still hurts.

You look for something to say in your defence, but your lips remain still as you look at that boy's father, who is waiting for nothing more than confirmation of his wish.

"Well? Are you coming to dinner?" young Aomine calls you in an annoyed tone, appearing briefly at the door only to be followed to the garden.

Sitting next to each other, you feel his arm behind your back, just like in the days of the photo.

It has probably become his way over time; after all, he has no reason to be under pressure: he is at home, surrounded by his family.

Too bad the same thing cannot be said about you.

You take a bite and smile at Natsume, for it is delicious.

"I can make it for you whenever you want, but you need to visit more often" she encourages you softly, filling your glass with cool water.

"I'll try but between classes and foundation activities, I don't have much time" you admit, amusing your nearby young, whose laughter draws everyone's attention.

"Come on" he exclaims in irritation "You have time for all that Akashi equestrian crap and you don't have time to go back home to see your friends? Satsuki chased you for weeks before you bothered to give her an answer, four-eyes has been pestering me all afternoon to have you at the party, but the only thing on your mind is bloody Kyoto!" he stresses , leaning his chopsticks against the rim of the bowl.

"You're right, but your attitude makes it easier to choose" you reply with a hint of nastiness, to which he would like to respond in kind, but which his father's intervention nips in the bud.

"You can consider holidays, I'm sure a few days off would do you good" he smiles at you, as his wife announces the arrival of dessert.

"That's a good idea" you admit, as you feel Daiki's hand slide away from the chair to reply to a series of messages that have been metronome to your conversation all evening.

"Imayoshi will be here in an hour, I'd better go take a shower" he concludes, taking a couple of mochi for the ride and abandoning the table, noisily pulling back the chair.

Thank heavens, you can finally breathe.

"When he gets like that it's because he wants to draw attention, he's not mad at you, don’t worry!" his mother tells you, slightly moving the plate of sweets for you to take another one.

You smile, accepting the invitation, and grab that soft treat.

"Does the Akashi family treat you well?" Shinichi asks you, taking a sip of tea.

"They should be very proud, instead" Natsume tells you, ready to listen to your secret.

"Maybe in the future, if I can prove something. We haven't been a family since granny died. She used to keep us together, now my parents are too busy rebuilding their lives to care about me" you admit "Since he moved to Osaka, my father is always missing, and my mother ... Well ... She ... That is, she's expecting a baby with her partner so..." you conclude, lowering your gaze to the buckram tablecloth.

"So she will have two children to love " Mr. Aomine reassures you, taking your hand.

"We'll see" you say, looking at the empty seat next to you, where Daiki's cell phone is ringing for the third time in five minutes.

"Yoshiko?" Natsume reads, retrieving the phone in time to see yet another call.

"Ah, she. She's the one he's dating. We'd better bring him the phone, maybe it's important considering how much she bugs!" you huff as the ringer starts for the umpteenth time.

"Thank you honey!" his mother smiles at you, smartly handing you the device.

If he were still in the shower, you could put the phone down on the bed and leave, without taking unnecessary risks.

Standing still on the threshold, you decide to wait for some sound or movement to reveal to you where the recipient is in the process of preparation.

"That's so stupid! " you sigh, disturbed by yet another call that the cell phone in your hands receives. You hear his footsteps move closer, see his tall figure coming out of the bathroom, and thank heaven he is fully dressed.

"Yoshiko!" you inform, waiting for him to reach you at the threshold, though he quickly makes it clear who is in charge, sitting down on the bed and forcing you to join him.

"She'll call back" he smiles, looking up at you.

"You better call her, she's been looking for you for half an hour" you suggest, pointing to the cell phone at his side.

"No " he teases, adjusting the collar of his pale grey T-shirt.

"Have you become that kind of man Aomine-kun?" you ask him, amused by his perseverance.

"The kind who hates to be tracked down? So I was born with it, you should know. You see, the girl you took over loved when I was a little wild with her, but maybe Akashi wiped your memory too" he concludes, pulling his lips into a smirk.

"Perhaps" you speculate, sitting down next to him, taking his phone in your hands and discovering with pleasure that, by typing in your date of birth, you could still have access to all his secrets.

"Let me see what a wild boy does, maybe my memory will come back" you snicker, shaking off some hot incoming messages and then the gallery under his astonished gaze, not really paying attention to either, but feeling inside you the satisfaction and need to put him on the spot.

"She's pretty bold, isn't she? But the question is ... Will she be wild enough? " you tease him, trying to ignore his gaze fixed on your lips.

"We used to play a lot, before" he tells you quietly "And I used to push you to the edge, just to finish the game my way. You loved it my way, back then. Do you remember how this game used to end?" he asks you, immediately returning the issue.

You barely nod, as if the question irritates you, but you try actually to hold back your urge to remember.

You hear the phone ringing in your hands again, you press the green button and Yoshiko's voice pierces your ears.

What if you had it all wrong?

What if that was your happy place?

You feel your eyes sparkle and your nose pinch as the woman hugs you tightly, telling you that you are like a daughter to her.

"Don't stay away for so long anymore" she whispers in your ear.

#knb #aomine daiki #aomine x reader #aomine x you #knb x reader #kuroko no basket #the basketball which kuroko plays #akashi seijuro #akashi x reader #knb scenarios

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akemilena · 7 years

Text

Burny!!! lyrics analysis

(partly based on this, but it’s my own interpretation!)

As said by John-san on twitter too, Burny!!! lyrics have a lot of references to old songs and even live events, so I tried to find the most obvious (tho if you analyze word by word you can find references in almost every little thing)

So, like Shiki says, here we go:

(Shiki) So, Tell kimi no ai

(Shiki & Tsubasa) moetai

(Shiki) FLAG nante oritai

moetai -> Shiki’s solo has the line “moeta” repeated during the whole song

(Tsubasa) Let It Go mugen no HEAVEN

(Tsubasa & Rikka) ikou

(Tsubasa) naru youni natte umorechau koi

Let it Go -> from Grave of Lovers (one of Tsubasa’s lines)

mugen -> found in Tsubasa’s solo FLARE

HEAVEN -> Tsubasa and Rikka’s duet is BLACK HEAVEN, Rikka also does the chorus for this part

umorechau koi -> in Grave of Lovers, one of Tsubasa’s lines says “koi ni umoretai”

(Rikka) Good Night kara asa mukaeru made

(Rikka & Dai) Let's Party

(Rikka) yoriau kaori

Good Night -> Rikka’s solo “Good night my darling”

Let’s Party -> found in Rikka and Dai’s duet Shall we Dance? (Let's Party,Dance Dance Dance), also Dai chorus in this part

yoriau kaori -> “kaori” found in Rikka’s solo Lily, also the full name of the song is Lily -yorisou yuri no youni- so maybe yoriau -> yorisou...?

(Dai) Show Time HIGH ni natte

(Dai) mirai e

(Dai & Shiki) mukau yabai

(Dai) yokan Stand-by

Show time -> the beginning of Grave of Lovers (by Dai)

HIGH ni natte -> appears both in Dai’s solo Jinsei Hard Mode and Tsubasa and Rikka’s duet BLACK HEAVEN

Stand-by -> found in Dai and Shiki’s duet Roug:e, also Shiki chorus

(Rikka) outer wo yabutte me wo ubau Dance Dance

(Dai) nouten wo yabure zenryoku de Sing-Along

(Shiki) Freaky na MC ni tomadowanaide

(Tsubasa) ryoute de aotte saa Clap Your Hands!

outer -> found in Dai’s solo Phantom Drive (thanks anon!)

Dance Dance -> Shall we Dance again?

nouten -> found in Shiki and Tsubasa’s duet chronoah (”nouten liner”)

Freaky -> from Roug:e, also found in Dai’s solo Phantom Drive

ryoute -> found in SEXY SENSE and Tsubasa’s solo Shout It Out (and more)

(Shiki) "Stop" kienai

(Shiki & Dai) honoo

(Shiki) chouhatsuteki taido Dive In Honey

chouhatsuteki -> found in chronoah

taido -> word/sound play with taido (attitude) and Tide (title of Shiki’s solo)

Honey -> you know what this is

(Tsubasa) Daring jidai wo niau

(Tsubasa & Shiki) daiou

(Tsubasa) dessert mo nai shi kanari abunai

darling -> same as honey

jidai wo niau -> a line in chronoah says “niatta jidai”

daiou -> I honest to god hope this is not what i think it is takizawa akira (apparently I’m not the only one who noticed it)

dessert -> from Grave of Lovers, Tsubasa’s line “chuumon shita dessert wa todokanai”

kanari abunai -> another word/sound play, kanari a(bunai) = canaria (Tsubasa’s solo)

(Rikka) Merry-Go-Around heart ni

(Rikka & Tsubasa) Gang-Gang

(Rikka) megami no egao ogande release

Merry-Go-Around -> found in Midnight Mystery

Gang-Gang -> from BLACK HEAVEN, also Tsubasa chrous

release -> in japanese ririisu, ririi(su) = lily (Rikka’s solo)

(Dai) Big Chance yume yobisamasu Call

(Dai) hate made 4nin de

(Dai & Rikka) ikesou Lizz

yobisamasu call -> (yobisama)su call = squall (Dai’s solo)

hate made -> also found in BLACK HEAVEN

ikesou Lizz -> Lizz is how SolidS fans are called, also sounds like “ike SolidS”

(Dai) Take Me Away

(Tsubasa) zutto kono saki e

(Shiki) mou

(Rikka) tomarenai kara

tomarenai kara -> found in CRAZY BABY SHOW

(ALL) Burny! motto agatte mera mera to tamashii enjou

(Shiki) Enjoy!

(Tsubasa) takanaru nekkyou

(ALL) gangan motomeatte odoriakaseba saikouchou

(ALL) Let's Dance! Dance! Dance Night

agatte -> from KARA DA KARA

gangan -> BLACK HEAVEN (again)

saikouchou -> appears in Tokyo LOVE Junkie (”nounai saikouchou”)

Let’s Dance! Dance! Dance Night -> Shall we Dance?

(ALL) Fire! motto sakatte giragira no taiyou mitai ni

(Dai) No Time!

(Rikka) engine zenkai de

(ALL) dandan upper ni natte yakeni kimi wo motomete

(ALL) Get Up! kanata e

dandan -> appears written in 3 different ways in SEXY SENSE, BLACK HEAVEN and Phantom Drive

engine -> also appears in Phantom Drive (thanks anon!)

only tv size and it’s already this long

Second half!

(Dai) Break in on time

(Shiki) So, Just the way you want

(Tsubasa) owari nante nai

(Shiki) Don't let me down again

(Dai) itai ko dakedo

(Rikka) ha na re na i omo i

(Shiki) dakishimete

(Dai) I know you love me

(Rikka) kuchibiru kasaneta

(Tsubasa) Now check

break in -> found in Roug:e (”breakin’”)

itai ko -> appears in Dai’s solo Jinsei Hard Mode (”itai ko dane”)

(Shiki) "Stop" Are You

(Shiki & Rikka) Ready?

(Shiki) atamannaka karamatta manma

atamannaka karamatta manma -> SEXY SENSE has a line that says “karamatta atamannaka”, this part was by Shiki & Rikka

(Tsubasa) Zig-Zag biyaku makare sawagu

(Tsubasa) mondai wa

(Tsubasa & Dai) nai

(Tsubasa) kedo mottai

(Tsubasa & Dai) nai!

Zig-Zag -> in Midnight Mystery, one of Tsubasa’s lines

biyaku -> in Doubutsu no Saga, one of Tsubasa’s lines

(Rikka) Kiss Me nee kokoro

(Rikka & Shiki) uzumete?

(Rikka) semete onegai last ni mou ikkai

Kiss Me -> found in CRAZY BABY SHOW

kokoro -> title of the song COCORO, appears in lyrics many times

semete onegai last ni mou ikkai -> reminds me of the last part of SEXY SENSE “yurushite onegai semete mou ikkai sasete yo asa made ni”

(Dai) Crazy, Come on nanka kurai ya

(Dai) dokomade mo soriagare

(Dai & Tsubasa) saa Lizz

crazy, come on -> both in CRAZY BABY SHOW

kurai ya -> sounds like “crier” from Liar Crier

soriagare -> “SolidS agatte” in KARA DA KARA, also a joke born from live events

(Shiki) Take You Away

(Rikka) negai yo todoke

(Dai) ima

(Tsubasa) mitasaretai

take you away -> along with the “take me away” in the first part, they’re both from Labyrinth (didn’t expect jonsan to reference vol 1 but hey) (also “take me away” is sang in japanese in Undefined “saratte” and COCORO “boku wo tsurete itte”)

the chorus is practically the same again except:

(Dai) Heat up!

(ALL) Get Up! KARADA e

Heat up! -> found in KARA DA KARA

KARADA -> same as above (of course)

(Rikka) mune no oku sakaseta koi no Flower

(Tsubasa) tobisatte kietemo “wasurenai”

(Dai) fukiareta itami ni aragatte

(Shiki) hikari wo

mune no oku sakaseta -> in Lily (Rikka’s solo) a line goes “mune ni sakasete”

Flower -> Lily is a flower, Rikka has the kanji for “flower” in his name

tobisatte -> “tobisaru omoi” in Canaria (Tsubasa solo)

kietemo -> Canaria’s full title is Canaria -kieyuku sora ni- so reference?

“wasurenai” -> a line from FLARE (Tsubasa’s favourite line actually)

fukiareta itami -> “fukiareru itami” in Squall (Dai’s solo)

hikari wo -> the full name of Shiki’s solo is Tide -hikari no sasu hou e- so reference?

(Shiki & Tsubasa) toozakaru jikan ni shigamitsuku

(Rikka & Dai) Just in love ugokidashita kokoro de

toozakaru -> from their duet chronoah (”toozakaru chronoah~”)

shigamitsuku -> also from chronoah (”shigamitsuku bokura wa”)

Just in love -> from Shall we Dance?

ugokidashita kokoro de -> literally a whole line from Shall we Dance?

(Shiki) motomeau

(Tsubasa) dare yori hageshiku

(Dai) mogakinagara

(ALL) kono te de

(Dai) Let's Get Down

motomeau dare yori hageshiku -> probably out of Tsubasa’s trademark “motto hageshiku motomete misero”?

kono te de -> appears in Judas

Get Down -> appears in BLACK HEAVEN

and then the chorus again, same as above!

AND THAT’S ALL maybe I’m reading too much into some of them but what’s clear is that it heavily references the Kachoufuugetsu solos and the duets and idk this song is a goddamn masterpiece and the bridge killed me and I owe takizawa akira my entire life

EDIT: Thanks anon for your help!! Also for those curious about the daiou I explained it here

#solids #tsukipro #proani #tsukino production #tsukipro the animation #idk if someone is even remotely interested in this but #i loved the references a lot #thank u takizawa akira for my life #he pulled a tokugawa nikkou toushougu with the kachofu titles tho #there are some lines that remind me of something but I CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT

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imagine-loki · 7 years

Text

Mr. Laufeyson's Ward

TITLE: Mr. Laufeyson’s Ward

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 11

AUTHOR: goddessofmischief

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine you are living in the late 1800’s and your parents pass away due to a tragic accident. Leaving you an orphan, you are sent to a miserable orphanage. Then, a mysterious and harsh man named Loki visits the orphanage and takes you on as his ward. He brings you to his crumbling mansion in the English countryside, where you face his cruel intentions, and eventually discover that you care for him much more than you’d like to admit.

RATING: T

NOTES: As always, thank you for your patience. Also, I thought I’d share the song that I based the waltz scene off of. It’s not actually a traditional piece of music, but I find it beautiful nevertheless. Enjoy!

Was I just a ploy being used by my master to make Lavinia jealous? This thought entered my mind as my master and I descended the grand staircase of Asthall Manor, amidst a cacophony of gasps and sudden exclamations, as the rest of the guests began to take notice of us. I squirmed uncomfortably at this attention, and entwined my arm more securely around my master’s.

“You have no reason to worry, Victoria. I will not leave your side.” He softly vowed, as we continued our protracted descent down the stairs. It had felt that my master was walking at an unhurried pace on purpose. “But sir, this… this will be regarded as a scandal.” “How so? You are my ward, and I want to be with you at all times in order to make sure that you are properly introduced to everyone else.” “But Lavinia, she will-” “Have to comply with my wish, which is to escort you.” He interrupted.

I so wanted to bring up the matter of the supposed proposal that was to occur tonight, but just then we reached the bottom of the stairs and the company dispersed to let us pass by, for my master’s destination was the ballroom floor. We made our way past the crowds of guests, who were all strangers to me. I saw that the guest list had been immense, given the amount of people assembled about in every room we went through.

Finally finding the ballroom, my heartbeat quickened to an irregular rate as I observed the expectant, and highly agitated, Lavinia in the middle of the room besides her mother. The crowd once again receded to make room for us, I hardly paying attention to this as my eyes were set on the mother and daughter, whose faces now became flushed with anger as they observed the two of us emerging from the crowd.

Yet when Lavinia spoke to us, she concealed her anger by addressing my master in a sweet tone. “Ah, Loki, I have been waiting for you.” Her heated glare directed itself onto the place in which my hand touched my master’s arm. “I am sorry for our tardiness, and that we have delayed your party from getting underway.” He spoke in a bitter tone, perhaps as a result of recalling her recent actions towards me, and it caused her to fully reveal her rage in response. “Just quit this nonsense and lead me in the first dance already.” She mumbled, her mouth hardly moving at all to deliver these words, so they would not possibly be detected by the surrounding guests. “I am sorry, but it seems that I have already reserved the first dance for Victoria.” He acknowledged straightforwardly, turning towards me with a smile. “Loki… what do you think you are doing?” She demanded, still in a hushed tone. “Maestro!” Mr. Laufeyson bellowed gaily as he led me over to the small group of instrumentalists to request a particular waltz, before leading me to the center of the dance floor. And I observed with dismay that not one of the other guests seemed interested in participating in the first dance, for they were preoccupied with watching us.

“Sir, why are we doing this?” I whispered, as I observed that a violinist and the pianist were settling before their instruments. It was to be a waltz that had been intimately composed: a duet. He chose not to answer this question, and instead drew even nearer to me and held out his hand. “Take my hand, Victoria.” I cautiously eyed his outstretched hand, fully knowledgeable of the implications of the course of action presented to me. “But she will never forgive you if I do.” He acknowledged this with a slight grin and a shrug of his shoulders, and he said no more, as then the music commenced.

I tentatively placed my hand in his, as my other settled securely on his shoulder. The shoes that I was wearing for the occasion augmented my height, therefore making it more comfortable for my master to settle his opposite hand on the upper portion of my back. The feeling of his cool fingertips brushing against my exposed skin had caused me to momentarily tremble. From hearing the initial notes of the music that resounded throughout the room, I was mystified that I did not recognize such a lovely piece. It would be a melody that would remain with me far after the dance that we shared was over.

He took a deep breath, which indicated that he too was uncertain of what he was doing, and of the consequences that would ensue as a result. Nevertheless, he waited for the right moment and then eased into the dance. I had much experience with waltzing since I was a young child, but it was as though this dance was something completely different. Perhaps it was the fact that our dancing was the focal point of everyone’s attention, which I had never experienced before, or maybe it was my master’s confident steps that made it feel as though the mere act of dancing was entirely foreign and novel to me.

I placed my complete trust in his control, briefly taking notice of the dazzling mirror, positioned above the fireplace’s mantlepiece, and our reflection as we drifted by: the subdued ambiance of the room heightening the impression that we were fully clothed apparitions, fleeing from the notice of one’s eyes.

When I tried to get another look at our reflections, I audibly gasped, for it seemed as though another, unrecognizable young woman was in fact dancing with my guardian. Surely that wasn’t me…

“Are you as surprised at yourself as I am?” He commented, studying my face and the expression of awe that passed upon it. “Yes, sir.” I responded, briefly looking into his transfixing, yet calm, eyes before I managed to get another glance into the sparkling pane of glass as we passed by it again. It was indeed myself.

The mellow and relaxed smile that was fixed upon his thin lips was an action of assurance, as if he was silently confiding to me that his choice to dance with me instead of his future fiancée was the most acceptable thing in the world. His eyes would not depart from mine as we continued to whirl about the center of the large room. The music becoming ever so subdued as the piano ceased to play and only the violinist could be heard.

And in the last moment of our waltz, the quality of the music gave off the impression that no crowd of strangers surrounded the scene, but that we were indeed all alone.

A realization befell over me. This foreign entity that my guardians’ nature was composed of was not entirely indistinguishable, for I then recognized what it was: It was an indescribable and undefinable passion that influenced his steps.

The final notes resonated throughout the room, which deterred me from my thoughts and made me slightly flinch at the eruption of applause from the others in the grand space. With my master’s hand still in mine, we exited through the crowd that had slightly dispersed, for more people had entered the ballroom floor to participate in the second dance of the evening. He didn’t even keep his eyes out for Lavinia as he guided me through the labyrinth of rooms, in search of one in particular. When we stumbled upon it, I gasped, for the room was filled with platters of fine foods, and empty of any other guests. The Browne’s had gone through quite lengths to make this gala auspicious, and this included providing their guests with delectable foods.

He headed towards the corner of the room, which specifically held only desserts. “I’m in the mood for something sweet.” He grinned mischievously, as his eyes speculated the many trays of cakes, biscuits, puddings and fruits. “Before dinner? How outrageous!” I chided jestingly and giggled like a schoolgirl. I was equally confounded at my behavior as I was at the elation that coursed within me from the excitement that the dance brought on. He picked up a strawberry drizzled in chocolate, and guided it to my mouth. I obediently opened for him and took a bite of the sweet, delectable fruit. He then carelessly flung the leafy portion behind him and I then had a supposition as to what he was fully planning on doing tonight: To make this ball a living nightmare for Lavinia.

He continued to devour the sweets, and would occasionally plop whatever he found highly delectable into my mouth to also try. “Yumm.” I remarked in praise, after he gave me some of the apricot tartlet to taste. It was then that the doors bursted open to admit a sobbing Lavinia and her anxious parents. Even Mr. Browne seemed quite dissatisfied by my master’s conduct. “How could you!” She wailed, rushing towards us with absolute rage. “You have ruined everything!” She specifically pointed her long finger, in which showcased a glimmering opal ring, at me. I moved closer to my guardian, and he protectively winded his arm around my waist.

“Loki, what is the meaning of all of this?” inquired Mr. Browne. He was the only one that was composed, for the way in which his wife’s enraged glare was fixated at my person clearly exhibited her animosity. I wouldn’t have been surprised if she ordered me out of their house at that very moment for ruining her daughter’s birthday. I’m sure the Browne’s would shortly forgive Mr. Laufeyson for his actions, perhaps by persuading themselves that I had coaxed him to share the first dance with me.

“Your daughter found it appropriate to come into Victoria’s room just before the dance to threaten and harm her!” He roared, while sharply eyeing Lavinia. “She wanted Victoria to avoid me, and only now can I fully acknowledge the wicked jealousy that courses through you, Lavinia!” “Loki, please. I’m sorry.” She hurried towards him and began to greedily grab at my master’s jacket in desperation. Yet, he did not give in to her pleas. He pushed her off, thoroughly repulsed by what she had done. “Please forgive me.” She cried, not wanting to be rebuffed by her lover. “It was mother’s idea after all!” She confessed. Mr. Browne softly gasped. “Catherine? Is this true?” He exclaimed, as he turned to his tight-lipped wife. His wife didn’t respond, and instead departed the room: her incensed husband following closely behind her. “Please Loki. Just dance with me once. That’s all that will be needed to cease the gossip that is already going about.” She pleaded, tears rapidly falling from her eyes and causing her heavy mascara to stain her cheeks. “No, Lavinia.” My master said sternly. “You must now face all of your guests, without me at your side.” A fit of sobs overcame her as she fled the room.

“I think it would be best if I’d retire for the night, sir.” I vouched once we were alone again. I knew fully well that my presence at this party had caused the true purpose of it, Loki’s proposal, to be put off. “No Victoria. The night is still young and besides, I believe many people would like to be introduced to the belle of the ball,” He bowed and held out his hand to me. “May I have the honor?” He proudly asked. His position at my side comforted me immensely, and helped in heightening my self-confidence, for I would especially need it with the large crowd that we were about to encounter once more. I slightly grinned, and situated my hand in his again. “Yes. Yes, you may.”

¨¨¨°º0º°¨¨¨

“I can’t believe I’m saying this: but that was actually fun.” I said as we were mounting the stairs to return to our rooms. It was already past midnight, the hours having wasted away without any regard on my part. “Yes, it was, wasn’t it?” He remarked with a chuckle. My master and I met many amiable guests, ate rich foods and shared many more dances. He had kept to his word that I was the only one that he would dance with tonight, for although many young and beautiful women came up to him, he nicely rejected them in a way that made them fan themselves as they receded. It was rather amusing. Also, later that evening, Mr. Browne had approached us and personally apologized for his wife and daughter’s behavior. He said that they had both gone up to their rooms for the night.

My master would not leave me once we made it to the upper level that held the guest rooms, and he was insistent on walking me to my door. “My room is situated to the left of yours. If you need anything, or if you are bothered again, please do not hesitate to come to me.” I nodded. “Okay, sir. Thank you.” My eyes were already clouding with drowsiness, and he took notice of this. “As I can see, I am keeping you from getting the rest you deserve.” He took up my hand and pressed his lips to my knuckles. “Sleep well, my dear.”

After unlacing and stepping out of my dress and undergarments, I lifted the crown off my head and situated it on my nightstand so I could look at it before my eyelids fluttered to a close. Once I was in my nightgown, I sat on my bed for a few moments longer, smiling to myself as I recollected about how pleasant the evening had been, and how compassionate Mr. Laufeyson had been in regards to ensuring my happiness and ease. He had managed to forget about Lavinia, and the ring that probably was nestled safely in his jacket pocket.

The berries of the crown, which almost resembled pearls, twinkled under the candlelight. I inwardly wondered where he had found such a crown, and whether or not it was originally intended to be given to Lavinia. But then again, he had brought it along with him to my room, before he had learnt of Lavinia’s conduct…

I leant over and blew out the light, causing the room to quickly descend into darkness. The berries and white flowers were somewhat still visible, however, due to the pale moonlight that evaded my chamber through the casement, which was only partially covered by the drapes. I swiftly fell asleep, unaware of what was soon to take in the room just adjacent to mine.

……

The sound of someone’s heavily drawn sigh roused me from my sleep. My body had shifted and I was now facing the opposite wall: my beautiful crown no longer in my sight. However, I grew apprehensive, upon realizing that another person was in my room. I had fallen asleep to a darkened chamber that was now illuminated by a single candle once again.

I turned around at once, catching the intruder by surprise, as I quickly noticed that the person fumbled with something in their hand before returning it back to the inner pocket of their dressing robe. I then shielded my eyes, for they were not yet accustomed to the brightness emitting from the candle’s flame. “It is only I, Victoria.” said my master. I lowered my hand ever so slowly, and observed that Mr. Laufeyson had stationed a chair right beside my bed. He was no longer dressed in his ballroom attire, and instead wore his nightshirt and a pair of sleeping trousers, which were accompanied by a long dressing gown of green damask. His long black hair was unkempt, as though he had been continuously running his fingers through it with worry.

“You couldn’t sleep, sir? What time is it?” I asked curiously as I sat up. “I’m afraid I could not, and it is around two in the morning.” He deeply exhaled. “I have specifically come to check up on you to see if you were disturbed at all.” “Disturbed? By what?” “It’s nothing to trouble yourself over.” He leant over and touched my shoulder as a means of reassurance. “I will leave you now. I want you to get some more rest. We are to leave early in the morning, so make sure you are packed up by then.” Leave? But it had been planned that we were going to stay for another three days. I did not question him about this, and when he got up to depart, I stopped him by taking his hand as he reached out for his candlestick.

“Please tell me what is wrong, sir.” He remained silent for a moment and diverted his eyes away from my person when he finally did answer. “I only wonder… have I done the right thing for you, Victoria? Should I have left you in that orphanage? You yourself once told me of your aversion to how I took you away from the friends that you had there.” “I know I said that, but you must see that everything was different back then. Since then, you have become my companion, and your friendship was all I wanted from you, Mr. Laufeyson.” “We have become good friends, haven’t we Victoria?” “Certainly, sir.” I said with a smile. He leant over and placed a tender kiss onto my forehead, his lips brushing my skin for much longer than I had anticipated. He then motioned for me to lie back down on my pillow.

“I’m looking forward to going back to Heathcote so soon. Having traveled closer to my hometown, all I desire is to return to Yorkshire with you.” I then covered my mouth to hide the yawn that then overcame me. “We will be home before you know it, my dear.” I was unaccustomed to him calling me in such a way. It was the second time this night that he had done so, and I was quick to conclude that it was utterly platonic: as a father would say to comfort his daughter. “Goodnight, sir.” He wished me the same as he took up his candlestick, and once my eyes left his, they were again drawn to my crown. As his steps retreated, the miniature, pearly white baubles grew lackluster, and my eyes gradually closed once again in repose.

¨¨¨°º0º°¨¨¨

Mr. Browne was the only one to accompany us to the front of the estate the following morning. Peter was already outside with the carriage and all of our trunks had been secured before sharing a quick breakfast, with only my master and myself present. I still was unaware of what had transpired that previous night after I had gone to my room, but I took notice that even the usually exultant and unruffled Mr. Browne seemed changed by what had occurred. He was unusually rigid in his manner as he wished us a safe journey back home.

Once in the carriage, it only took a matter of minutes for me to discern from overlooking the surrounding scenery that we were not on the original road that we had taken to get to Leicester. “Is Peter taking another route back home?” I asked my master, who had been unusually quiet this morning. However, from the dark circles under his eyes and his unfocused gaze, it was evident that he had not gone back to sleep after he had left my room. “Yes, he is.” He answered briefly, without any hint as to why he was doing so. “Why, sir? Is there a problem on the roads?” “No.” His short answers were disquieting, and reminded me of the first journey we had taken together. I sighed and looked out the window with disappointment.

“I thought we would stop at the Hambro House, Victoria. Birmingham is not too far from here.” He said, his tone and manner of speaking were unreadable. And at once, my heart began to hammer profoundly in my chest and terrible ideas filled my mind. Although I deeply desired to visit my friends again, all I could think about was our conversation the night before and how he had openly shared to me that he had been debating if taking me on as his ward, and fulfilling his promise to my father, had been the best course of action for me. “Are… are you taking me back? Do you no longer want me? Do you consider me a burden?” These questions left my mouth in rapid succession. A look of perplexed grief fell upon his face “Victoria! How could you presume such things? Of course I-I want you.” The latter portion was delivered with a softness that was difficult to define.

I hadn’t taken notice that I had begun to cry. Tears plummeted down my cheeks and stained the satin skirt of my burgundy dress, the places in which my tears landed were made more plum in hue. “Oh Victoria, do forgive me. I did not know that my words would upset you.” His hand reached out towards me, a handkerchief in his palm. I took it and brushed away my tears in haste, urging myself that no more should fall. His arm then stretched out to take up my hand to further assuage me. “I never want to hear you call yourself a burden again, alright?” Only a meek nod answered his gentle demand.

By the time we approached the Hambro House later in the early afternoon, I was no longer concerned about my master deserting me. Instead, I was brimming with joy as I looked out the carriage window at the familiar ivy-covered building that could be seen in the distance. This would be the second time that my master would be dropping in unannounced, but I knew that Miss Grey and the others would not object, now that I accompanied him.

“Oh, sir. Can’t you see it, there in the distance?” I marveled without taking my eyes away from the orphanage. “Yes I can, Victoria.” He replied with a heartfelt chuckle. I could sense that he was admiring the happiness that permeated my entire being. I was so excited that I could not sit steadily in my seat. Felicity filled my heart in a way that I feared it might burst. The carriage barely came to a complete halt before I opened the door and scrambled outside. My feet hastened to the front doors and I knocked with urgency. I didn’t have to wait long for the door was opened by Miss Grey herself. She peered at my person through her pince-nez spectacles, bewildered by my very presence on her doorstep. “Is that you, Miss Victoria Dowling, or are my eyes fooling me?” “It is I, Miss Grey.” I leaped forward and wrapped my arms around her thin body. She laughed with an uttermost joy, before she shouted into the corridor behind her. “Girls! You must see who has appeared on our doorstep. Come quick!” She said, as though she believed I was a passing ghost who would disappear without forewarning. I was already familiar with how quickly the corridors of the Hambro House transmitted sounds, but I was still taken aback by how hastily all of my past confidantes appeared in the narrow hall and on the wide staircase leading to the upper levels. I searched for the face that I had missed the most, but I could not find her initially.

The girls all stood mute, and were not smiling, but I knew the reason why: for I felt his towering form behind me. “I apologize that we have come unannounced. Our visit was entirely my guardian’s idea, you see.” I gave him room to enter the hall and stand at my side. I affectionately linked my arm with his to further prove of our amity, and how my master was no longer the formidable man that had originally taken me away from this place.

Then, on the top of the staircase, I saw her. I recognized her blonde tresses and her wide, goofy grin. Her pale cheeks were glistening from the tears that were falling from her blue eyes, and I too began to silently weep immediately upon identifying her person. Other girls stood to the side as she alighted from the stairs, and I met her halfway in a loving embrace. “Oh my kindred spirit, I thought I’d never see you again.” She whispered into my ear as we both continued to sob in our happy reunion. “Neither did I.” I finally confessed.

As we separated, the other girls crowded more closely around me, welcoming me back with heartfelt words and hugs. I took notice that my guardian smiled upon the scene from the end of the corridor. “You must see the garden, Victoria, and I have something important to tell you. Come on.” She urged, tugging my arm. I looked over at Mr. Laufeyson, who was by then preoccupied with having an animated discussion with Miss Grey. Therefore, it didn’t take much for me to acquiesce to Agnes’ suggestion.

The garden, tucked away at the back of the orphanage, had bloomed brilliantly since my absence. The array of different flowers and plants took my breath away, and I wondered if our garden at Heathcote would eventually blossom as radiantly. Agnes and I were soon joined by many of the other girls, as Miss Grey had told them all that their duties and lessons were to be for ignored the rest of the day. It was to be a day of relaxation and jubilation. It felt almost as though I had entered a scene of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, even though it was not yet summer, and the frolicking girls could not completely pass off as woodland fairies in such drab uniforms. To evade the other girls, Agnes brought me into a secluded portion of the garden, separated by a wooden fence in which pale purple lilacs had taken over. The sweet smell of the lilacs was enchanting.

“I never mentioned something to you in my letters, Victoria.” She revealed. “What is it? Not something misfortunate I hope?” I took her hushed change of disposition to foretell of a sorrowful piece of news that she wished to share. “No! Not at all.” She took a deep breath. “On the contrary, it is in regards to my parents.” A smile beamed across her face. I became flummoxed. Her parents? They who had stranded her here as they greedily journey out to Australia in search of gold? Who had not written to her for years? “They have written to me, Victoria, and they are coming back to England! They are actually on a vessel homeward bound as we speak. ” She shouted exuberantly. I tried to reason with her. “But don’t you feel at least a bit of vexation towards them? They left you here, all alone. They abandoned you and missed out on your childhood!”

Deep down, a truth was pulling at my soul. Agnes’ parents had left her, yes, but it had not done her any harm. She had been able to grow up in a wonderful and enlightening environment, filled with other girls in similar or worse predicaments and nurtured by Miss Grey: a mother to them all. I had two parents, and yet, I had been more accustomed to loneliness and misery all of my life than any of the girls under Miss Grey’s care.

“They are forgiven. They have learned from their faults, and they have have my full-fledged forgiveness. I love them and I will happily accept them as my parents. We have yet to decide where we are to live, but papa believes that the going further north would suit us well. He was a farmer all his life before he left for Australia, and he wishes for us to settle on a adequately sized, and fertile, piece of land. Would your guardian be able to find us such a place?” “I-I think he just might be able to, yes.” I took her hand and guided her out of the area that we were in and back out onto the more open section of the garden, where even more girls were now assembled. Telling her to momentarily stay with the others, I sought out my master, who had also found his way into the garden beside Miss Grey. I ran up behind him, causing him to slightly jump when I placed my hand on his arm. “Ah, there you are,” he blithely acknowledged, “I was wondering where you had gone.” “Sir, I have a question to ask you. May we speak privately?” I begged. He looked towards Miss Grey, who dismissed herself wordlessly with a smile and we began to walk around the perimeter of the garden together.

“Agnes’ parents are returning to England from Australia, and they were hoping to settle on some farmland further north from here. I was wondering if the property that you were going to sell to my father is still available?” He grinned, perhaps due to my evident enthusiasm. “Yes. It is.” “And the property is fertile for farming?” “The most fertile land in the entire county, I would say.” He stopped walking, and we were nearby the garden gates, which gave us a vast overlook of the many happy girls sprawled about the garden area. “I shall write to Agnes’ father once he is in England. After they collect Agnes, the Blythe’s are welcome to stay at Heathcote while they examine the property and make their decision.” I stepped forward and hugged my master tightly, while he slightly stumbled backwards in response, as he had not expected such an outward display of gratitude from me. However, he returned the gesture by wrapping his arms about me. “Oh, sir. Thank you.” And before he could respond, I had dashed off to return to Agnes with this joyous news.

¨¨¨°º0º°¨¨¨

“Do you ever notice the way that your master looks at you, Victoria?” Agnes whispered to me, as we were both huddled near one another in her bed. We were inseparable, and planned to chat with one another the entire night once the other girls in the sleeping quarters had gone to bed. I had been surprised that Miss Grey was open to this arrangement of letting my reside in Agnes’ bed, given the mischief that was bound to unfold when we were together.

The remainder of that day had been splendid. Everyone joined in on a variation of different games and activities, and we then sat down to a delicious and over the top meal prepared by the cook, Miss Maudsley. One of my favorite events had been the charades, especially when my master attempted to act out ballet dancing. I nearly doubled over with laughter, had it not been for a young French girl named Clotilde who sat on my lap.

Unbeknownst to my master, who only assumed at first that I was simply holding her on my lap out of kindness, the truth was that she wasn’t entirely fluent in English and I acted as her translator. Miss Grey, another teacher and two other girls at the orphanage were the only ones who were also wholly knowledgeable of the French language. I had been taught by one of my governesses at a young age.

“Il ne danse pas très bien le ballet Clotilde, mais il est très bien avec la valse.” I said into Clotilde’s ear, which caused her to giggle. Mr. Laufeyson had been walking past me as I said this, just after one of the girls had guessed his charade correctly, and stopped abruptly before proclaiming: “Tu es une fille secrète! Qu'est-ce que je ne connais pas de vous?” I had been equally shocked to discover that he too was fluent in the language. His accent was perfected and he dictated his words with a natural eloquence. “Je suis plein de secrets, monsieur, et il semble que vous aussi.” I had answered with a sly grin.

“What do you mean?” I responded to Agnes’ question. “Surely you must see how he never seems to reserve his attention to anything or anyone for so long as he does for you. Also, how he smiles whenever you speak, and how his eyes seem to well up with a sense of longing whenever you are not near his side.” I scoffed at the ridiculousness of her words. “You’re speaking nonsense, Agnes.” “No, you are simply oblivious, Victoria.” I was momentarily silenced by what she was implying, and endeavored to reason against this. “But he is my guardian, and he is much older than me.” “Those things are inconsequential in regards to love.” She postulated in a nonchalant manner.

I was initially made speechless by what she proposed. “L-love? Who said anything about that?” “Do you care for Mr. Laufeyson?” She eagerly went on. I sighed. “Of course I do, he is my closest friend next to you… and didn’t I just remind you that his is practically engaged?” This was true, before all of this we had been discussing what had occurred at Lavinia’s party, yet I had only mentioned that Lavinia and my master had a small dispute. I had also left out other details of that night: details that would only amplify her present supposition.

“Yes, to a rich brat who would never make him happy.” I rolled my eyes at her brashness. “Agnes, look, he is my guardian and I believe that is all he shall ever be.” “Whatever you say, Victoria, but I think he loves you. Truly, madly, deeply! And that he is infatuated by you!” Her volume steadily rising as she blurted out these convictions. I clamped my hand over her mouth, as I knew she would have no shame in waking up the entire inhabitants of the orphanage, including my master, who was in a guest room not too far away.

After a moment passed and I lowered my hand, my austerity broke and I began to softly giggle alongside of her. Yet, my friend’s words still reverberated within my mind, causing my heartbeat to fluctuate at what she had suggested. Was I utterly blind to what others could perceive?

French translations: “He does not dance the ballet very well Clotilde, but he is very good with the waltz.” “You secretive girl! What else do I not know about you?” “I am full of secrets, sir, and it appears that you are too. ”

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