#unless maybe the machine path?

[hyperfixatedfandomer]

Revenge is a dish best served with love; Spider and So’lek found family

I’ve been bothering @dirtytransmasc about it all day and I can’t stop 😭 there is such a strong potential for a story between these two if they were to ever cross paths!

It could go so many ways, but I see Jake giving Spider away to him as one of the possibilities. He does it under the guise of giving Spider training necessary to keep up with the Na’vi, so he could help out the insurgency but in reality, he bribed So’lek into taking Spider under his wing with the opportunity for revenge. And we know So’lek loves nothing more than revenge.

What better way to make Miles Quaritch himself roll in his grave than to mould his biological son into a sky people killing machine?

So the two set off for the western frontier and Spider begins his lessons in survival, as well as combat. He gets to see the man behind the legend and the truth is — the man is barely there. His mind is always partly consumed by violence; thoughts too dark for the boy to imagine. He also sees that So’lek lacks emotion in anything unrelated to war, and is a man of a few words unless discussing tactics. He’d heard that this Na’vi lost his entire clan in the battle of the tree of souls, but seeing the consequences of that event up close was different from being told about it. Trauma defined him.

They reach the clouded forest, and So’lek begins to teach the boy ways of battle. He is just patient enough for Spider to catch things on the fly but as usual, offers little empathy if he struggles or smalltalk when they’re out of combat.

So’lek’s "hunts" are the worst part. They happen rarely as Socorro is not dubbed to be ready for that yet, but he is often taken along to be taught by example. He gets to watch as something like an unsuspecting convoy of RDA grunts falls victim to what they call, among other things, "blue death". He sees them scream and shake in pure terror of a creature they clearly knew, sees how little of a chance they stand against a seasoned warrior as he moves like a silent shadow and takes the sky people out one by one. Swiftly, yet brutally. He calls those outings "hunts" for a reason.

And the way he speaks of sky people makes something in Spider’s spine shudder. The man speaks of them as game, seemingly forgetting that the student who’s intelligence and strength he often praises is still a sky person himself — not in spirit, but in body.

Socorro isn’t sure about this ordeal anymore. The more he finds out about the legendary warrior…the less he wants to follow in his footsteps. Protecting the people has always been something he wished to be useful in, and he loved the Na’vi, loved Pandora, his one and only home…but he can’t let himself become anything like So’lek. The way he sees it, killing should be performed mindfully. Spider hates the idea that taking a life, no matter what life, maybe become second nature to him. A reflex.

Killing should not ever be so easy.

On the other end of the line is So’lek himself. He never thought that taking in a child, even as just a temporary ward, would be so difficult. For the first time in fifteen years he has to feel again, and he hates it. Socorro makes him feel out of control, makes him feel frustrated, confused, tired, amused, alive.

With how stressed Jake sounded when he offered to give him the boy, So’lek assumed Spider was a danger; a nantang disguised as a harmless yerik, but the longer he waited the more he realised that said nantang was nowhere in sight. Not to say that Spider was a yerik either. If anything, the child strongly resembled a playful syaksyuk (prolemuris).

Spider, as any other kid his age, hungers for adventure, for freedom and fun. Even with all the respect he held for So’lek, he was a difficult boy to reel in and keep in line. He was constantly busy with something, be it a crafting project for their base (which, since he appeared, more and more resembled a home), exploring the wilderness or collecting something. Most often rocks or herbs.

His smile is so bright, So’lek feels blinded by it every time.

…no. This isn’t right. This isn’t how it was supposed to go, the man catches himself think. He was supposed to "steer Socorro in the right direction", as Jake had put it yet as weeks passed, his resolve melted into something he haven’t felt for years. Could it be…?

No. So’lek was absolutely not getting attached to the child in his care. He couldn’t. He was a sky person; a son to the demon.

But, he was so different from anything So’lek has encountered. There was fire in his honey eyes, but it burned with desire to protect, not hurt. He had an impressive muscle mass, but used it for climbing and weaving only. He made each kill matter, praying for every fallen thing even as So’lek hurried him to skin the meat before it got shrouded. Everything about nature fascinated, awed him, so he thirsted to learn of this new forest and every creature living within it.

Spider could speak of his home for hours. About the animals, the different plants, the remedies one could craft from them, and eventually, as always, he’d speak of his family. His precious siblings he’d raise hell to protect. He loves them more than anything because they are all he has in this entire world, no parental figure in sight. So’lek fights down the urge to hold a child he sees himself in when he hears it.

Spider…has subverted every possible expectation So’lek had of him. So pure and naive and filled with hope in spite of what he has already lost, and the dangers surrounding him…

And So’lek planned to break him. Take all of it away and turn him into a cold-blooded soldier. No more then a weapon for the Na’vi to wield.

What in Eywa’s name was he thinking?

So’lek wants to return Spider to high camp and forget about the deal, but it’s too late. He felt his wards crumble as the human he thought he needed to fear nestled deep within his heart, and now they were bound. He looked at the tiny thing sleeping in a hammock far too big for him. Then at the walls, now painted with images of animals and insects; painted the Omatikaya way. He then turned to the floors, now covered in mats Socorro weaved in his free time.

He made this place a home. Put so much effort with both his skill and voice. He brought So’lek’s base alive. Brought alive him even. It is only fair that So’lek puts in the effort to make this a home for the boy as well.

Just for fairness sake, he thought, tucking the child in as a smile tugged at his lips.

He wasn’t getting attached.

Not at all.

#atwow #avatar2 #avatar frontiers of pandora #frontiers of pandora #avatar frontiers #avatar fop #avatar so’lek #so’lek frontiers of pandora #avatar spider #spider socorro #avatar 2 #avatar way of water #spider avatar #atwow spider #avatar headcanons

[thewriteblrlibrary]

A Step-by-Step Marketing Guide so we can spite traditional publishers (and make people cry).

~ This is a guide specific for fiction/writeblr. All of this is for free and there is little social media posting/ads involved (unless you want to venture into that). ~

Within the writeblr spheres, there's this underlying hope that our stories will find their audience. Perhaps we'll have a fandom full of fanart and video essays, or maybe we'll be an instant classic and sit on collectors' beloved bookshelves. Our stories could sit within the deepest corners of someone's heart and maybe they never tell a soul about what's so special to them. Maybe our stories become those 'underrated masterpieces'.

Or we just want to see people ugly cry over our writing.

Whatever your hope may be, marketing is an important path to venture on (especially because traditional publishers are rejecting diverse books in favor of ones that are already famous + the whole sub-par machine thing they seem obsessed with.)

And thus, my childhood marketing obsession will hopefully be of use to you. This is all for free (unless you want to spend money) and you don't need to figure out social media platforms (unless you want to, and this guide works if you decide to take that route too.)

Step One: Characters

Marketing spheres will define these fictious people as 'avatars' or 'the target audience'. You could also call them characters. Because that's what they are: fictional people.

For this step, you shall create characters that would love your story.

And here's some great news: You've already done this.

Perhaps you wrote your story to comfort a prior version of yourself. Perhaps each character in your story holds an aspect of your personality. Perhaps you were ridiculously self-indulgent and made the story you would've loved to read. These are all possible characters you can reuse for marketing.

Write down 2-4 quick archetypes for these characters. You'll chose an aspect of your story (characters, themes, or the younger-self that you wrote it for) and write a thumbnail sketch. (Main issue, fears, wants, personality traits if they relate to the main issue.)

I'll do it for my story (the Land of the Fallen Fairies) down below:

Anuli-like (my MC): Overthinking and aloof. Wants a happy ending but thinks their current personality/character isn't good enough for one. The present stales in comparison to the past/the childhood they lost. The 'gifted theater kids'. Kamari-like (side character): Postpones happiness in favor of creating a perfect schedule/getting accomplishments. Heavy masking. Creative but doesn't create anymore. Promises themself they'll enjoy themselves later, when they've earned it. Workaholics. My younger self: Wanting a fantasy escapism to embody the traits they wish they had in real life. Dissatisfied and worried about reality. Perfectionists. Self-indulgent: People who love plants and forests and fantasy worlds far away from reality/humanity.

Great! Now it's time to find these characters.

Step Two: Setting.

(Let's assume you're using the internet for your marketing. But a similar method works for real life too.)

Where do the characters live?

In order to figure that out, we need to discover the characters' interests, what they watch to solve their problems, and who they find #relatable.

(You can do this for each character or for all the characters at once.)

For example:

Anuli-like -

interests: Stories. Analysis videos. Fantasy escapism. Things that remind them of their childhood. (so nature, warmth, comfort, play, imagination and the times they would actually enjoy learning.)

Places to look: Nature quotes, ambience videos, children's shows and fairytales (comfort shows). Fandom culture - fanfic video essays, fan art.

Solving problems (the problem being wanting a 'happy ending' but feeling that their personality/lifestyle/characteristics aren't right for one): Mindfulness things. Self-healing. Quotes and meditations and candles galore. Slow living. Nature vlogs. Self care. All that 'live in the moment' culture.

Places to look: Slow living. Nature vlogs. The 'softer self-help' (spirituality stuff. Magic/ overnight answers). Witchcraft. 'aesthetic nature' places. Guided meditations.

#relatable: Burnt out gifted kids. People who think so much that their life passes them by. Storytellers and creative who create to make sense of the world. People who like dark, gory things in spite of who they want to be. People who don't like reality.

Places to look: Those 'learn better and remember everything' places. (The 'burnt-out gifted kid' recovery places.) Stop overthinking spots. Those quotes on Pinterest from poetic people who think too much /aff. Storyteller places. Dark academia. Classical music. One off quotes/ poetry.

Okie dokie. Once you have this, find channels, social media accounts, blogs, songs, books, etc. that fit with the categories you wrote down. (They should appeal to the characters) You can search up some of the terms you listed into searches and see who pops up. Bonus points if you find people that overlap with multiple sections.

I know I didn't include booktube or booktok in here. You can if you want too. But those can be a bit... 'consume these 500 books'. You also want to find other places where people who would like you story live, even if they don't follow booktube or booktok.

Congrats! Now you know where your characters live!

Step Three: the scary part

Take everyone you found on your search for the settings and write them down a list. Make sure you get an email/contact info. (they usually list them somewhere under 'for business inquires') Also feel free to watch their content and get to know what attributes these settings have.

And now... we talk to them. about our stories. You can do it. I believe in you.

This called 'pitching your product' in marketing spheres. But you can be informal about it.

I know it can be difficult to talk about your work, so here's a tone to have:

'I made this thing I like and I think you'll like it too'.

What you'll do is send an email (or dm) that goes like this (inspired by Creative Hive on youtube):

Hi [name],

[Genuine compliment]

[Quick sentence or two about your story. Include the themes and who it appeals to. If you have a logline/sentence summary, include that. But I find that the underlying themes and 'who's it's for' is more engaging.

For my story, I might say something like.

I've written a story you might enjoy, since you like [interest]. It's called the Land of the Fallen Fairies. It's a nature-themed commentary on the pursuit of happiness and fixing yourself to deserve that happiness, told by an overthinking, unreliable, houseplant narrator. It was supposed to comfort me when I got frustrated with myself and my happiness chasing, and I hope it can comfort others too.

(That's probably a bit long and I can trim it down a bit.)

You can phrase it like a gift if you want too.]

[Call to action.

'If you like it, I'd appreciate a mention on your [platform].

I know this part may be difficult to mention (imposter syndrome is not fun.) But I promise that if they do like it, they'll be happy to mention it.]

If they don't respond within... four-ish days? (A week at most). then you can include a follow up. For this you can include a template with info about your story. This way it's easy for them to talk about your story.

The template:

title

genre

blurb

Author

where to find the book

Bonus points if you have an additional, physical thing to send them.

Congrats! Now do this pitching process a few times until you've covered most of your bases. (Pitch to as many people as you can. It will get more comfortable as you do it. Play your favorite song and don't let yourself think too hard about it.)

----------

The benefits of this process are that you find people that are already interested in the themes and vibes of your story (in comparison to to ads, which get shoved in everyone's faces.). Someone your audience already trusts will talk about it, which means you don't need to do all this trial and error to find your audience and make content for them.

It's basically a bunch of people talking about something they like!

AND you diversify your audience across niches, but with an underlying theme/interests. Booktok/booktube must appeal to everyone, so it's a hit or miss for recommendations. (Unless there is someone that specifically does one genre/type of story.)

From here you can do fun little things to build up hype and make the book launch feel like this fun event. (I love it when that happens so here's my thoughts about trying to create an event with your story... although that may require another post entirely.)

preorder goals

charity goals

Arg's and puzzles

fund with side plushies and trinkets

Book blog tour

book boxes

as many memes as you can make

rewards (like bookmarks or posters or smth) that people can get for supporting

Talk about the process of creating your story. I know this one channel called 'Dead Sound' that creates 'making of' videos for his short films and they are some of the best videos on youtube.

Okay dear storyteller! Now go forth and share your story with the world!

Additional resources:

Creative Hive <-- a youtube channel that goes through the pitching process.

This video is also very good <-- Haven't watched the rest of the channel but I assume it's also good.

One of the best marketing channels on the internet (the videos are actually entertianing to watch.

Seth Goldin <-- I read his book and took the parts I liked and modified for storytelling marketing.

Dead Sound <-- propaganda to watch the short film series he has (he did the whole 2-d 3-d style wayyyy before spiderverse did... and he's one person making these. One person. It's amazing.

Glitch <--- If someone can figure out how The Amazing Digital Circus was marketed then I will pay you money. It seems to be a lot of memes and funny things.

#writers of tumblr #writerscommunity #writing advice #writing tips #writer stuff #on writing #writeblr #writing community #writer #storytelling tips #fiction #writing #filmmaking #creative writing #writers on tumblr #writers and poets #marketing strategy #pitching #writing resources #resources #useful #for reference #useful stuff #the writeblr library #please do well post #I've spent so much time on this

[theemporium]

Hello, I hope you’re having a great day!

I wanted to put in a request for a daniel x sunshine blurb. How would they deal with jealousy? Like maybe someone new that works for the team starts blatantly flirting with sunshine, how would daniel react?

Thank you so much for supplying us with all of the amazing daniel content 💞

aw thank you! and thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

.

Daniel Ricciardo had always been a happy, go-lucky kind of guy.

He was a ray of sunshine in the world of Formula One. He was known for having a smile plastered on his face. He was known for being kind and polite with everyone, and it made him one of the most liked people in the paddock—regardless of what team you supported or worked for.

And Daniel was proud to be known for such. He was proud that he got on with everyone so well, that he didn’t necessarily have enemies in such a crazy and complicated Motorsport world. He was proud to say that people saw him as a welcoming face when they were new to the sport.

Well, maybe everybody except Johnny in Marketing. 

Johnny was a young guy, baby-faced and fresh out of university when he joined the Red Bull Racing Team. He played a major part in the marketing and social media side of things, and Daniel thought he seemed like a really nice kid. And he was. 

Until Johnny started flirting with his girlfriend. 

Daniel wasn’t sure if the boy was clueless or just had balls that were beyond his comprehension, but he didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit. He didn’t like how Johnny went out of his way to talk to you whenever you crossed paths. He didn’t like the way he stared at you from across the motorhome. He didn’t like the way he constantly tried to make you smile and laugh.

You were his Sunshine. Your smiles and laughs were reserved for him and him only. And this Johnny kid needed to understand that unless he wanted to be the first on the list of Daniel Ricciardo’s enemies. 

“Stop that.” 

“I’m not doing anything.” 

“You’re planning something,” Max said as he narrowed his eyes at his teammate. “You’ve got that look on your face.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Daniel muttered.

“Just don’t do anything stupid,” Max sighed, shaking his head. “She will kick your ass.” 

“Yeah, whatever,” the Aussie waved him off, his eyes laser focused on the sight of you and Johnny standing by the coffee machine. 

It was harmless. At least, he was assuming it was harmless considering the fact he couldn’t hear the conversation. But then, you were taking a sip from your drink, a small line of foam decorating your upper lip, and before he could even realise it, Johnny was leaning forward to wipe it away with his thumb.

Max barely blinked before Daniel was already halfway across the room. 

You stepped back when Johnny reached for you, a tight-lipped smile on your face. “It’s fine, I’ve got it.” 

But the boy just grinned at you. “I don’t mind.” 

You blinked, clearing your throat a little. “I think you’ve got the wrong—”

You never got a chance to finish your sentence, you never got a chance to let the new kid down as politely as you could because your caveman of a boyfriend was by your side before you could even blink. He was by your side and his hand was on the back of your head, holding you in place before his lips were on yours. 

It was a passionate kiss. One far too messy and intimate for the eyes of all your colleagues, and one that would have had your cheeks burning if it weren’t for the fact Daniel was so damn distracting when he kissed you like that. 

When he pulled away, there was a shit-eating grin on his face as he murmured a soft, “there, got it” before turning to see Johnny standing there, lips parted in surprise or shock—you weren’t sure which.

“Flirting with my girl, mate?”

There was a smile on his face and a lightness that could only belong to Daniel Ricciardo, but both you and Johnny heard the underlying tone. You saw the flash in his eyes, the only warning the Aussie would give. 

“N-No, sir,” Johnny said, shaking his head. It took less than five seconds before he was scampering away, trying to make himself busy. 

“That was mean,” you murmured, though you still leaned against your boyfriend. “Even if it’s kinda hot when you’re jealous.”

“I thought you liked when I was mean,” Daniel whispered, his voice a little gruffer than before and it made your whole body feel like it was on fire,

“Exactly, Ricciardo, keep it reserved for me.” 

“Yes, ma’am.”

.

#daniel ricciardo #formula one #f1 #daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo x you #daniel ricciardo x y/n #daniel ricciardo fic #daniel ricciardo one shot #formula one x reader #formula one x you #formula one x y/n #formula one fic #formula one one shot #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 x y/n #f1 fic #f1 one shot

[viviennevermillion]

Beauty and the Beast

notes: this came to me in a dream....well, sorta. listen to this beautiful version of the song "Beauty and the Beast" by Karliene!

contains: capitano x gn!reader

warnings: none!

The Captain was feared by many. From his current homeland of Snezhnaya to the far edges of Teyvat, he was known to be a menace on the battlefield. Mysterious, never revealing his face or true identity and never leaving any traces that could have you guessing at who the man was behind the mask truly was. If there were more witnesses to his missions aside from the loyal Fatui soldiers, the Captain mused he surely would have become some sort of boogeyman by now; a story to tell your children to make sure they don't just go running off on their own or; considering the creative liberties some of their parents might take making up stories about the fearsome warrior; dont leave the house at all for at least three weeks.

Everyone was always wary of the Captain. They kept their distance from him unless they were called closer. After all, wasn't it better to be safe than sorry? Granted, a lot of the commonfolk would fear the harbingers given their position in the Tsaritsa's court. But even among those who were regarded as brave by their peers, few would be mad enough to willingly get closer to any of the high-ranking ones. Such was the path fate seemed to have laid out for Capitano and he was sure that he was meant to walk it alone. To do his duty, follow his principles; even when others were quick to disregard them and believe the tall man had no such thing as values or a sense of kindness in his heart.

It was easy to brush off the unknown and the powerful as monsters and killing machines. It was a familiar response to that which people struggled to grasp, even when Capitano handed out soup for all his subordinates in the cold dead of winter nights, when they had been sent on a mission. Even when he sent the injured home rather than using them as cannon fodder on the battlefield. Even when some of the Fatui soldiers walked by to see Capitano tend to the palace garden, trying to give some life back to the soils of Teyvat after all the deaths that had occured in the wars and conflict he led his subordinates into. One could always find an explanation for his behavior without having to jump to the conclusion that the Captain was capable of caring and nurturing life other than his own.

And then there was you. You, who caught him off-guard by simply approaching him as if he was just one of the many souls you met in your day-to-day life. You showed no sign of fear towards him. He'd have brushed you off as naive if he didn't know better. But then again, what was so bad about giving a chance to someone like him?

Capitano always tried to appear less intimidating when he was around you; scared of losing something he never even noticed he was lacking. Kindness and attention from another. Someone who genuinely wanted to get to know him. And so, how could he not indulge you? Over the passing of days and months you learnt many things about him he hadn't shown to anyone in a long time. Maybe he would have, if someone had only dared to ask.

You learnt that he liked taking care of Zapolyarny Palace's vibrant garden a little once in a while; although he admitted that sometimes he messed up and destroyed some of the flowers on accident because of his sheer physical strength.

You learnt that he liked collecting trinkets from his travels; the walls of his room being ornated with several ships in bottles, ancient maps, trophies and photographs of places he had been to. Death seemed to follow a man like Capitano like a shadow at his heels; his shoes seemed to be made to pound the pavement and trample everything in their wake. The objects he brought home with him reminded him that life was also all around him. That almost every place he went to had been touched by humans and their unwavering curiosity and relentlessness. He quite enjoyed telling some of the stories behind them to you. Relaying what he had learnt and observed about civilization to someone he hoped considered him a kindred soul.

You learnt that he made some crafts in his freetime and enjoyed reading biographies of famous travelers.

You learnt that behind that mask; behind his power and status, Capitano was just a man. From the first time you saw him, Capitano felt like that was the only thing you ever looked at. The man behind the mask. Like you beckoned him to come closer and tell you his story; to rest his weary bones from battle and enjoy the moments you were able to spend together.

Ever since he became a harbinger, Capitano had never seen much reason to take off his mask in the presence of another person. For what were they to see, but another face of evil?

Besides, it protected his identity and gave him an additional aura of authority; not that he particularly needed it.

But when he took that mask off before you for the first time; when he showed you the raw emotion his face never had to hide for as long as he was wearing his helmet; showed you the battle scars that lined his features and the face so many had theorized about and feared despite never having caught a glimpse of it; all you did was call him beautiful. Accepted him as he was and affirmed to him that you liked what you saw.

When you cupped his face for the first time; the first touch he had received like that in many, many years; Capitano melted into your touch as if you were his salvation.

Now, after years of fighting and wandering the earth, he had finally arrived at a place he could call home.

He chuckled at how you handled him as if he was the one needing protection.

It's something different, he mused, I needed something different.

He readily accepted your love and affection with open arms; from the featherlight kisses you blessed his face with to the way you'd cherish the flowers he had grown himself in the garden and the stories he told you about the world.

Now, even in his hardest battles, death was nothing but a distant voice; for life resided in the heart you had given him to protect and he was reminded of you a little by almost everything around him. Of the nights you spent resting in his arms, the evenings you had danced with him through the empty ballrooms of the castle; teasing him with a reminder to not step on your feet; and of the taste of your lips.

One day, he knew, he'd bring a ring home to you to ask him to stay by his side forever.

"Thank you", he told you as he pressed a warm, soft kiss to your cheek, "for not seeing me as a monster. For taking the time and patience to get to know me. For loving me as I am, just as lost as anyone, really." And you had taken his hand and sworn that you would always love him. Even in this ever-changing world, when the sun has set and risen again a million times, the storms had raged across the land and the sky had shifted; still your love lived on.

#genshin impact #il capitano x reader #capitano x reader #il capitano #capitano fluff #genshin impact x reader

[icyblogs]

flesh and bone

Winter represents many things. The start of a new season. The beginnings to an end. Or the beginnings of a new start. Years finally caught up to you, finally knowing enough to summon a creature able to fulfill things beyond your wildest imagination. So why is it that you're now finding out that everything was orchestrated from the very start? Or: A DND au where a human falls into the clutches of a fiend and his guard dog. Patron!Ghost x Fem!Reader x Warlock!Soap WC: 6.8K Based off of this thought ! [AO3] -> Next Chapter Warnings: Start of a dark fic!! Mentions of death, depression, dubcon touching, semi-graphic description of violence, paranoia, manipulation, reader has a backstory to make sense for plot! A/N: i've never written for cod before so i'm sorry if characterizations are wonky okay ty

Winter represents many things. The start of a new season. The beginnings to an end. Or the beginnings of a new start. Most often in literature they can be associated with the circle of life- many animals lay dormant in this time of year. But even still, it goes to show the fragility of life; some creatures thriving in the atmosphere while others retreat back to their homes and really remember just what they’re living for- waiting it out until the leaves sprout anew. Just as the waters of puddles and lakes crystalize into ice or the roads start to slowly become less traveled– many things come into association with this time of year.

Death, mourning, skiing- sledding. The dichotomy of moseying along something in nature that could so easily kill you. Just for a bit of adrenaline. For some thrill or interesting experiences to tell at the next person you see at a tavern, drinking and chortling over a tankard of ale. Albeit most races aren’t built to survive freezing temperatures, they sure act like they are. But some actually are of course. Goliaths with their adeptness of surviving in the mountains- up to twenty thousand feet in altitude. Some dragonborn depending on their ancestry, hailing from ancient beings that simply thrive in some of the most subzero of places in the lands. But of course.. most are not. Putting on layer upon layer to just merely survive in these conditions- unable to even thrive unless the circumstances deem worthy enough. 

It is seldom worth the consequences. 

The winters were frigid as always, sharp pin pricks of frost seeping into through your stagecoach’s insulation even though the artificer claimed they infused the interior with a heating cantrip. Damn swindler- “100 gold for a safe and warm journey!” It unfortunately was the price of discreteness.. but maybe if you wished hard enough the air coming through would be enough to keep you from turning into an icicle- but it provided almost an almost numbing sensation to temporarily soothe the anxiety pricking at the recesses of your mind. 

Just a few more hours, just a bit more time, and everything will be perfect. 

Regardless, it was a fitting evening, all things considered. The mountainous path was characteristically barren- as to be expected being so close to Midwinter. Dense fog drifts further obscuring your vision as you stare out the semi-opaque glass into the no man’s land. Trembling fingers smooth out your cloak as you straighten in your seat, the temperatures seeping through and nipping at your skin despite the warm wool gloves that cover the appendages. Your breath was a foggy mist as you breathe, leaning back as the air swirls around and encapsulates the interior of the.. Let’s call it a cozy vehicle. 

It was easy to notice the slow pace that the coach was going: after all you can only be lost in your thoughts for so long. Going out of the city during this time of year was always a toss up on how navigable things would be.. But given the surge in technology with these infused machines and .. these wizards and such- theoretically it should be a breeze.

A gilded bag sits beside you on the worn leather seats, the contents packed with purpose- containing the bare essentials, among other things. It was silent besides your ragged breath, gripping the fabric of your cloak in a white-knuckled grip, lips pursed as you glanced through the fogged glass once more as if something would change in the scenery. The engrained tick made it a habit hard to shake off; eyes flickering back and forth repetitively either side of dark path on the left of you to the dark path to the right of you, almost compulsively like it was an itch needed to be scratched despite there being no one there the last ten times you checked. It was a simple inkling that needed to be constantly taken care of- as if the moment your head was turned, you could almost swear that something was looking back at you. 

A face? Ah, it was just some branches-

The stagecoach swerves and it makes you jolt out of your thoughts, eyes glancing behind you towards the front of the carriage, absentmindedly chewing on your tongue and a grimace immediately crosses your features, not even registering the pinprick of pain in your mouth. 

Seeing the horses rearing their hooves, stopping in their tracks, the horse’s squeals were loud even over the sound of the biting wind. All of it felt too familiar; it’s been years and yet.. It’s almost too easy to fall into the abyss of your mind, your breathing slowing. The slow and steady stream coming to a halt as if the crimson in your veins were mere molasses- stopping the flow to what allowed you to properly breathe, feeling as though your chest was being crushed. Pressing down, ripping the air out of my lungs– peine forte et dure. 

It was almost mocking in a sense, the stagecoach seems to disappear and you’re planted firmly back in the painful memories that dance around your skull like a rattle, the taunts and phantom pains drifting over the side of your face. Remembering the curve of a dagger sinking into your skin and through tissue, choking on blood- a sense of blind panic seeping its way into the air that your lungs struggle to remember how to be of use. You recall smoke- thick and permeating down your trachea, choking- gagging for some sort of reprieve, your hands outreached to grab their hand if only you could stretch just a little further-

 A bang startles you out of your stupor as you gasp, head whipping to the side- cold sweat dripping down your temples. Your left hand feels unnaturally heavy as you take a deep breath to steady your haggard breathing, trembling as you stare at the coachman- a harengon- you hadn’t recalled his name. He hops into the interior, shooting you a look of concern. You gulp a few times to soothe your dry throat, the taste of iron bittersweet, coating your tongue as if a rich cabernet- thick and heavy. Familiar.

“Ma’am- I’m so sorry. The path is too treacherous I can only take you this far-”

It takes you longer than you would have liked to collect yourself-, licking your dry lips, the cracks from the dry weather causing the simple motion to sting. “And- And I do believe I paid you for a full express ride through the Surykyk Range and to the top of Mt. Akka. Did I not?” Your voice is firm, albeit a little shaky as you cock your head looking at the rabbit with pursed lips.

He looks apologetic, wringing his hat between his two paws, his ears drooping. “Ma’am, really, you have to understand-”

“Understand?” 

“Yes, I know you prepaid but the road after this gets too perilous and..” His voice becomes a sort of background noise, an ugly feeling festering as you blink slowly. There was that sensation again you’ve felt a few times over the past few years; a little tingle on the hairs of your neck as they raised, along with the incessant buzz that completely sounds out the haregon’s voice. His lips move- words that seem to go in one ear and out the other, as if making fun of you. His droopy ears, his expression of sympathy- no pity. Looking at you like you’re some sort of wounded animal– no- he was mocking you. Of course he was.  

Your hands tremble as they tighten into fists, mouth opening and then closing and you let out a heavy sigh. It was irritating- how could a simple job such as this could not be? Pay some gold to get to the top of a mountain- why was everyone around you acting so completely incompetent? Why are they acting as if you were asking them to do the impossible? In this day and age a small trip of this magnitude should be nothing. A walk in a park. If they weren’t going to be of any use then.. Why are they even in front of you at all? Do they seriously not know how long you’ve waited for this and they’re just denying you access? Over a petty blizzard? No. 

Beneath your gloves the skin was taut as you tighten your hands into fists as if it would help ground yourself but to no avail. The low buzzing grows louder; like bees humming around your brain like the ridges and valleys were honey- drowning out the pounding of your heartbeat. Louder and louder, reaching deep into the grooves and making their place known, feeding on your festering distress. On your negative emotions. The sense of trepidation melds back into being wound up like a tight spring as you continue to stare hard at the rabbit; your body acting as if on auto-pilot. His whiskers twitch. And you? Well you just go through the movements and zone out once more, falling into a welcoming void of darkness, surrounding you- comforting you. 

The blood rushes to your head as your heart pounds, the buzzing ceasing to a low hum. When you come back to, you are still in the stagecoach, however, you are the only living being in it. It wasn’t necessarily a surprise really, these recent bursts of blackouts are more common as of late, happening more often than not. They happen at the most random of times and always seem to exemplify death- oddly enough it only started happening after the incident. Only after you found out you could summon a greater being to give you power. 

Your eyes flicker down to the white boots you were wearing and click your tongue, seeing the sprinkle of red bleed into them as if the blood were a brush and the leather it’s canvas. You try to rub out the stain but to no avail, only smearing it into a sort of pinkish hue. Your eyes then move upwards towards the wooden ceiling and then fall unceremoniously towards the corpse, wiping your forehead with the back of your glove, face losing color. Your hands felt almost achy, the muscles strained and well.. Seeing the way his neck was bent ninety degrees, it was understandable. The aftermath of these blackouts were never easy. Fighting down the growing nausea, you stumble out of the stagecoach, clutching your bag firmly to your chest as you pass the horses- trudging through the rough terrain. 

—

The hours feel longer now, the evening turning into twilight, as you take the trek by foot. Sheer cliffs drop sharply into the abyss below as you continue to climb further and further from mass-population; rising steadily in elevation as you take in the sights all around as far as the eye can see. The thick blanket of fog really did make it hard to see everything clearly but what of the forest around you that you could see was big. It was vast, the barren trees with a light coat of fresh snow brushing along their branches. Grand normally in nature, but even more so as they seem to tower over the road: the branches sticking out like gnarled fingers, hanging over the cliffside as if trying to beckon you off the beaten path. The snow covered ground is uneven, the shadows cast by the moon creating disfigured shadows and shapes that play tricks on your eyes.

It honestly didn’t help the anxiety whatsoever; the fog, the falling snow— the overall just sensation of being watched. You blame the paranoia and lack of sleep at the time, but it was  impossible to resist the urge to look behind you to see if something appeared in the last two seconds you weren’t looking. 

Maybe the Haregon was.. right. It was, for lack of a better term, hell. Auril’s reach was deep- as to be expected being so deep into her territory, but it was terrible. The snow piled up to be knee deep, having to pay close attention and really watch where there was the slightest indentation in the snow- if only to figure out where the fissures were so you don’t fall to an unseemly death. It was nearly impossible to do this with just the moonlight to light your way: wishing that you didn’t care so much in case something went wrong. You should’ve just gone through with all this in the comforts of your home. 

After all.. It would surely be a shame if you got so close to your goal and yet never reached it. Would truly be such a pity. 

The area was honestly reminiscent of what you might conjure up Stygia being like; how you might imagine that part of the hells being in terms of barely being traversable- snow as far as the eye could see. It wouldn’t be a surprise if you saw a gaggle of frost giants or the start of the Styx the next time you turned a corner as you continued to steadily rise in elevation. 

The snow crunches beneath your feet, creating a rhythmic cadence. Every step is a genuine, calculated effort to not slip and fall on the surface- gripping the mountain side tightly as to not fall. And well, in addition to yet everything else the frigid and occasional gusts of wind that sends plumes of snow swirling around you, only adding to the overwhelming sense of sheer isolation in this desolate landscape. The further in elevation you get the more that feeling grows on you. It doesn’t help that you can barely see ten feet in front of you either. However.. At some point you realize you may or may not be lost. It was.. Well, it was hard not to get lost.

Yeah, you were definitely lost.  

It was easy to look up at the sky and huff, taking a few deep breaths to calm your nerves, but it was certainly a difficult task. Back in the city when you initially planned out this whole grand scheme, it was theoretically supposed to be an easy trip. Go out to Mt. Akka- far away from civilization in case you mess up the ritual, and then summon the all knowing being and make a pact. It was supposed to be easy. Three easy steps. After all that’s what he said all those years ago. The man that started all this.

— 

Days after the incident had time crawling to a standstill- the hours feeling like weeks.  Funeral arrangements made and gone through with. Sympathies and gifts sent to your temporary place of residence as if they were truly sorry for you. ‘Sorry for your loss.’ ‘She was a wonderful mother, a great friend.’ If they truly felt that way, then why was it just you looking down at the casket as it got covered with soil? Why were you the only person who seemed to be grieving for this loss? Why did nobody else come to pay their respects as you stayed for days, finding solace in the overturned soil? As if you could claw your way through the ground and climb inside with her, hugging the charred corpse and burrowing between her ribs. Aching for the sensation of a hug, of an embrace. 

It really was no surprise when you’re found spending your nights in a shady tavern. Tucked away deep in the city- in alleyways, far away from the upper levels. It really was the best place to drink away your sorrows. It was the perfect place to become a nobody.

Huddled into a corner of a grimey back alley place, the wood sticky and stained with what, you weren’t sure. It was loud that night; and yet there you were: alone with nothing but a tankard of ale to drown out anything else. Just wanting to get numb. Just wanting to .. stop everything. Patrons come in and out, and yet there you stay even as dawn begins to rise. Sticking out like a sore thumb despite the best efforts to blend in. Too rigid to count as a regular, too downtrodden to appear lighthearted enough to familiarize yourself with the other joyous people. Just a meager human in a hodgepodge of species. 

That’s where he found you. Sitting on a stool on the end of the bar; staring down at the amber liquid, gently nursing the liquid- too many drinks in to necessarily turn your nose up at the far too bitter and pungent cheap ale. It was now a more comforting taste, dulling the senses, muffling the loud noise, turning it into a vice. 

A hand brushes along the curve of your ass- quickly making its way up and settles over the nape of your neck- squeezing absentmindedly, and you’re brought back to the present. Head lolling to the side slightly as your gaze travels upwards. Bright blue eyes stare back at you, resembling a kaleidoscope of precious gems- sapphire, larimar, kyanite- swirling and sparkling with mischief, his gaze adorned with an impish grin. His dark hair was ruffled up in a sort of weird style, long on the top, short on the sides. He was a peasant, it was easy to assume but if you were more coherent, it was easy to tell that he was anything but, despite how he presented himself to you. Back a little too straight, nails clipped and short, no signs of dirt underneath them. The stranger’s fingers dig into your flesh and you frown, squinting up at his sheer audacity.

It was then you noticed his ears- ah. That’s why he looked so .. ethereal. His skin was perfect. But he had facial hair.. A half elf? Regardless, you stick your nose up at him as you scowl, perfectly content to wallow in grief in peace. Trying to twist your head out of his gentle, but firm grip. Mouth opening to tell him off- to leave you the hell alone–

“Ah’ll buy ye a drink bonnie.” His low purr cuts off your starting protests, hovering over you, blocking your view from the rest of the tavern- hand squeezing you once more before falling and taking their place across your lower back as if it belonged there. The warmth of his skin follows your movements as you press against the bar in a sluggish attempt to get some space. The man tilts his head down at you, giving a toothy smile when your frown deepens, looking at him with clear apprehension- “Dinnae ken, i’ll buy ye something strong. You look like ye need it, hm?” 

It was easy to squirm under his insistent gaze, nodding. Eyes half-lidded as you blink slowly, the pads of his fingers absentmindedly tapping into your back when you didn’t answer verbally. “Yeah.. I guess so.”

Never realizing that you never had a choice; it truly was never an offer. 

Regardless, this stranger- Johnny you later found out his name was- listened to your tales and woes as you blubber over the ‘top’ shelf liquor. Slurring your words incomprehensibly as he sat on the stool next to you, large hand now finding its home in holding the flesh of your thigh far too high up to be considered respectable. It was easy to take the information given to you at heart as he even gave such great life advice. Describing wonderful tales of protection- of something to work for- a goal to try and get to. It was hard to remember at the time why his words seemed to cut through the fog of the alcohol, and why it stuck with you. 

“And he’d make sure ye’d never have te worry about nothin’ again. Set up for life, able to get easy protection for yerself. Sounds like a dream, and it’d only be a few small things tae do.” Poisonous words seeping into your ears paired a saccharine sweet smile hiding the maws of a dog ready to bite down at a moment’s notice. Holding himself back, playing nice for you. For him. “I mean yer a wee bonnie thing, drinkin’ your life away. Shh.. shh I ken, I ken- I know it’s hard.” Wiping your tears away as they start to overflow again, hiccuping as you take another large swig of your drink. 

John was just one of those people that it was easy to talk to- maybe it was how long you’ve been in this place, or maybe it was the fact that he was buying your drinks, who knows. Just a charming gentleman, knowing all the right things to say, and so what if he was a little touchy? Maybe he just needed a little bit of comfort too, surely you could understand that, right? He was so nice in fact that he walked you back to your temporary residence- silly, you must’ve forgotten you told him where you were staying- and when you woke up the next morning there was a concisely written note with everything you needed to do. The smell of sulfur stuck to the parchment as if burned into the grooves of it. 

What a nice guy.

—

Yeah, looking back though it certainly wasn’t the brightest idea to go this far away from civilization. But you heard it was a scary ritual! That there might be a lot of consequences to it! But as you looked around the snowy scene with a huff it was clear that you were more than likely not going to make it any further than this without just flat out dying. So.. you pause in your steps. The situation was just so absurd, that you were risking your life for something that might not even happen. But what else is there for you to do at this point? It sparks a bubble of bittersweet laughter in your chest as you wipe away some flurries on your nose- maybe you can just wish to make it out of here alive and well instead. 

You crouch down, awkwardly trying to clear away the snow to reveal the hard ground- your hands freezing wet by this point- the wool gloves feeling as though it was becoming brittle and stiff. It takes a few minutes but you were able to eventually clear a decently sized space around you. The ritual should’ve been performed at a higher elevation, for your sake of mind over anything else- but at this point it was quite literally probably either do or die. So might as well try to give it a last ditch effort, right? And with how the snow continued to descend thick and fast, like a relentless onslaught with no regards towards your personal quest, it was only a matter of time. So you continue to awkwardly carve out a space around you, grimacing at how your hard work was by the minute getting covered up by the steadily growing blizzard around you. The line of sight diminished drastically as the snowstorm swept through the landscape like a ghostly specter, cloaking the world in a shroud of swirling white and obscuring all signs of life or landscape. 

Clutching the bag so the contents don’t get blown away, you procure a small glass jar of a fiend’s blood- trembling hands starting to pour it on the ground in an attempt to recreate the shape you recall tracing so many times before. It certainly felt different using blood as paint rather than graphite; practically speeding through the process as by the second, snow was landing on your now coagulating hard work. The symbol was lopsided, the intricate circles and lines definitely asymmetrical and not fully correct- A gust of wind shoots through the gorge, the force nearly strong enough to make you crash into the ground. You stumble as the sound of glass shattering resonates, the sound echoing even above the roaring sound of the wind rushing past you. You gulp hard, shaking like a leaf in a raging storm- when another gust, almost like a predator sinking its claws into your skin; forcing you down into the ground, as if you didn’t have permission to stand. Your body hoists itself up for but a brief moment and then unceremoniously falls, and you scowl as your body is forced into a makeshift kneeling position, the cold tendrils blowing past you as if in the imitation of a bone chilling hug.

Well.. a pact summoning could be done standing or sitting down, you suppose.

Somewhere along the way your demands and wishes for this pact- for this all giving wish might have gotten a little.. skewed. It had been a whole process to get to this point after the accident- years dedicated to sneaking about the forbidden areas of libraries- going from nation to nation, paying hefty amounts of gold for mere names that might aid you on your quest for the power to protect yourself. The power to protect what once had long been past, like a memory fleeting in the wind. Faceless people crying out for you to run, for you to stay- for you to save them– for you to save yourself. The power to reach your hands further out and save your loved ones. 

So .. when did that start to twist into the wish to live. To simply survive the circumstances you’ve thrust yourself into? 

The blizzard seems to rain even worse as you sort of tussle down a gem in the ground of one of the circles- some emerald pendant your family has had in their lineage for centuries. It was an attachment that felt sort of poignant, one of the only few things that’s survived that is of their memory– blinking away the forming tears as you watch the snow slowly fall over the item. You then proceed to pull out a singed book of spells- one you’ve tried to use a countless number of times, but the weave never seemed to allow you to tap into the energy; and you’ve had to hold onto it for the ritual as it was a magical item, no matter how much it was just a blatant form of mockery. As if saying ‘wizards and sorcerers can use me and yield results, so why can’t you?’ You set the heavy leather book on the other circle.

 You crawl against the force of the wind awkwardly to the middle of the practically ruined ritual circle, trying not to ruin your already stained clothing- but at this point did it even matter anymore? A small vial is procured- this blood visibly lighter than the fiend’s- this being one of a fellow human; the blood of a friend. You haul yourself to your feet, digging into the hard dirt to keep yourself stabilized, despite how badly the world was trying to send you crashing down to the floor. Clearly unable to keep yourself steady, you hastily drip the liquid beneath you, already starting the incantations that you know oh so well, spreading the liquid in a smear with your heel, praying and hoping this would work. Watching as each drop sinks into the sleet, the macabre tapestry that spirals out– as if the very land itself was painting a picture; weeping for the fallen, mourning their passing in silent reverence. It was for a good cause- you told yourself. 

Years of letting your feelings fester, dedicating years of studying and researching towards this moment, your palms becoming doused in red and the darkening of your soul- all towards changing your fate- though you had hoped this moment would end up being done in a well.. more covered environment, however it was no matter. This was the better alternative- getting power for free. Not having to train and be proficient in magic and study all those years. Your mind sort of just latched onto the idea of working smarter- not harder. To get a shortcut in the way of life. 

Infernal spills from your tongue- accented and choppy despite your best recreation of it- clearly not of your mother tongue despite the fact you could practically recite it in your sleep by this point. The incantation was slowly spoken, like a low rumble- reaching the far back of your throat, the cadence deliberate and guttural as that small hum of a buzz begins to slowly begin in the deep recess of your mind. A small pocket knife is procured from your bag, flipping it open as you urge your voice to be louder than the howling wind as the snow swirls around you like a vortex. The blade presses against the palm of your hand.

The pain lasted for but a brief moment, small bubbles of blood starting to dribble out of the wound, falling at a faster rate as it dripped onto the circle beneath you, combining with the scarlet already split. The cold wind continues to swish around you, your clothing providing little to no protection as the incantation becomes louder, the words becoming choppy– more frantic. The shadows grow longer, the trees groan as if bearing the weight of something heavy. And then your voice comes to a stop, panting as you wait for something to happen, smiling as you look around with wide eyes, a numbness starting to make its way through your limbs.

Silence.

And more silence.

It was painstakingly easy to panic, hastily repeating the incantation as loud as you can- something setting in. A realization of what you were doing? Yeah that wasn't working.

 “No- Nono.” Tears make it harder to see, blinking them away as another cut was made, adding more blood to the middle of the circle as if that would solve all the problems in the world- “Why- Why isn’t it working? I did everything right-” The pitch rises in your growing hysteria, looking around at the partially covered symbol to see if something went wrong. An exasperated sigh leaves your lips and it turns into a chuckle and then into a full on fit of laughter, your cracked lips forming a larger grin. There’s no way right? That this was actually happening. Years of your time- nearly five god forsaken years. If you ever saw that blue eyed elf you’d kill him. Fucking hell-

“Please-” Your head tilts back as you glance up at the stormy sky, pinpricks of fear running down your spine as the expression simmers into a more somber one. It all comes crashing down as a jarring realization that all this time- you didn’t even know exactly who it was you were trying to summon. That elf and all those people telling the stories of tales across the land, talking of a being to grant power. To grant wealth. To provide enough strength to save the people around you. To take a nobody and turn them into a somebody. To give reason to actually keep living instead of joining your mother six feet under. Buried back under the burnt down remains of your estate.

It was described as simple. Summoning the being in a circle of a fiend’s blood- establishing a connection to the outer realms. That part was simple enough, though it took trading with some shady people but eventually you got what you needed; some mercenary you had to pay off to look the other way as you essentially go through the process of bloodletting an imp. Then draw out the symbol- provide the items of a precious gem and a magical artifact. Easy enough. Provide the blood of a friend- showing how willing you are to cut ties your former life to just to establish the connection, and finish it with a drop of your own blood to finish the connection, all while chanting some very specific incantations. 

You did all that. So.. why wasn’t it working?

You performed it perfectly. 

The hard ground felt like nothing to your numb body as you sank into the snow once more. Glass glitters in the snow as it presses into the side of your face, but you barely register the pain. It was supposed to work. All those scrolls- all those people, all that time. And for what? A useless invocation. Something that didn’t even work. Taking the time and energy, going out of the way of civilization in case something went wrong and..  Yet. And yet- It was silly. It was so freezing out here, the air thin and hard to breathe, but for some reason it felt warm. 

You weren’t anything special, a mere human in the world of dragons. In a world of krakens and beholders and all these amazing things. And yet at the end of the day.. you were just a regular old nobody. Sure, you were of a sort of nobility status- though not anymore– but you were trying to change your past; trying to make yourself better. To change what has already been predetermined- to reach up and touch the stars, not realizing that you were tethered to the realm. Trying to rewrite predetermined fate, as if you actually had a chance at being anything more than being completely useless-

It was easy to lose your train of thought, head swimming as an unsettling terror seizes your chest- everything begins to fracture and break. The sounds around you start to become distant echoes, muffled and indistinct, as if you’re listening from the bottom of a deep well. There's a strange detachment, as if you’re floating on the edge of reality, holding on only by the thinnest of threads. The cliffs around you seem like they’re combining overtop, as if you’re looking through a fishbowl lens: the shadows seem darker, twisting and turning under the moonlight’s glow. Your thoughts slow to a crawl, each one a struggle to grasp onto before slipping away like sand through an hourglass, fighting a losing bottle to have any idea be coherent enough to pass through the filter. Accompanied by a tingling sensation that spreads from the tips of your fingers to the crown of your head, as if your body is disconnecting from itself, each limb growing heavier and more distant with every passing moment. 

Why did this happen? Why.. did it not work? 

Why did you even try? You just wanted to be more. You just wanted to survive. To live.

Black dots fly in your field of view; dancing around like fairies in the wind, mocking as they flutter across your vision with no rhyme or reason. Your vision blurs- the unsaturated colors of the snowscape soften into monochromatic tones of gray; the moonlight seems to go further and further away as your head sinks into the snow; the dots growing larger as if obscuring your vision.  

You’d do anything.

You blink slowly as the buzzing creeps up louder, wrapping around your brain and clinging to the nerves. And then all at once dissipates, leaving an eerie silence in its wake. The feeling of being watched seeps into your conscious state of mind but at this point it was a mere afterthought, feeling hollow as your eyes fall half lidded.

“Anything?” A low timbre resonates around you, emanating from no discernable source. The disembodied voice seems to drift around your fallen form, as if hovering- waiting. 

The realization has a little chuckle ripping its way out of your throat. Oh, you were hearing things now. Lovely. You were discombobulated clearly, eyes closing as you breathe slowly, your heart seeming to calm down. The voice- you weren’t exactly sure if there was someone around you or if you were genuinely going crazy, like it was some angel above speaking to you on death’s door. 

Right. Keep your eyes open- it’s not time to sleep yet. Right? But honestly it wasn’t even that cold anymore. Rather warm actually- like you were being coddled in an embrace- why would you want to move? Your eyes squint open against the snowstorm, looking around blearily at your limited scope of sight. Your limbs feel not only heavy but numb, and you knew moving them would be a chore and so you simply stay put laying down. There was a brief moment of nothing and then- Ah, right. There was someone speaking to you.

“Uh huh.” That sufficed right? There was an unnecessarily long pause, prompting you to continue talking- after all, what harm would it do? “Wanna live.” Your tongue felt heavy, as if speaking required some sort of insurmountable effort. You shift- pressing your face further against the dirt, lacking the energy to try and do anything else, little pricks of blood starting to stain the fresh snow.

“You’d do anything?” The gruff voice rings out once more and you almost groan, eyes fluttering around uselessly, vision blurring and becoming unfocused. Why was it–he?- asking you that? Aren’t your last moments supposed to be in peace, not filled with conversation? 

“Anythin’.” You slur, gasping for breath as soon as the last sound finishes your chest suddenly tightens, constricting your breath, as if the air around you stills. You don’t notice the change in atmosphere, the magic sprinkling around your body- floating and pulling at unseen chains tethered deep in your heart- too hyper focused on the sudden searing pain on the back of your neck; akin to a branding iron. 

“Silly girl.” 

You writhe at the sensation, whining, feeling the individual lines of runes being carved deep into your skin. The pain was unlike you’d felt before, even from the pain all those years ago. No- this– this was agony. This was being trapped in a whirlpool, dragged under the depths by the relentless force of pain, unable to find solid ground. This was thousands of needles piercing your skin, pulsing through you like a constant drumbeat- each throb, each line being carved only sending waves of agony. Like a black hole, taking you deep into the Shadowfell, into the Nine Hells- being torn apart- each limb being torn. No- not torn. This was more precise, being carved like a butcher- no like a surgeon, meticulously taking their time to dissect you. To pull back your skin and peer at everything that makes you, you. Each individual nerve and muscle laid bare as they are probed and examined, delving into the very essence of your being. Seeing what makes you tick, what makes you smile- your worst thoughts- your deepest desires. 

This feeling wasn’t.. unfamiliar oddly enough- in fact the opposite, as if you’ve felt it before, except this time it was a more obvious invasion, a violation of your innermost sanction as it digs deep into your body and pushing past your ribs and settling into its new home, wrapping an icy claw around your heart and constricting–

Then all at once the torment ceases, the pain being replaced with almost a sense of reprieve. You feel the phantom of a hand brushing over the now raised skin, causing your sweat-ridden body to jerk away frivolously, before settling, letting out a soft sigh. The sudden relief was like stepping into a new realm of freedom and tranquility; as if all the burdens you previously had were released. Like gentle relief that calmed the raging of your mind- calming the storm of anguish and bringing a moment of clarity and peace. The fear that once consumed you, the sense of hopelessness that weighed heavy on your heart, the loneliness that haunted you for years—all of it now seemed fleeting, like passing thoughts. As transient as the wind sweeping through the sky, soon forgotten. Those years of all that struggle; all those years of searching and praying for some sort of help. Like a weight lifted off your chest. You could reach above; no longer being bound to the realm: you could do anything. Be anything- Your eyes had closed, when did they close? You open them- seeing nothing but the darkness of the mountains, but it was so weird, as you could feel it- him- hovering around your form like a lingering shadow. A man? A monster- you weren’t sure. It was hard to tell.

And so, when your eyelids inevitably fell closed once more, it only made sense you were too far gone to even notice the skull-faced monstrosity standing over you, his head tilted as he looked down at his newly anointed warlock with an inscrutable expression. Rich amber eyes looking down at you and then- a pleased hum resonates through the air.

Mere minutes later the spot where you once laid was coated with a fresh coat of snow, looking like a pristine blank page, as if nothing had even transpired there in the first place. As though you never existed in that space to begin with. 

#dark fic #ghoap x reader #ghost x reader x soap #ghost x reader #soap x reader #patron!ghost #trying to out how to properly build up mindset and trying to encapsulate the feeling of hopeless that typical pacts convey- #because a lot of times warlocks stumble into the pacts or are tricked or like on their deathbed #Wanted Ghost to be this sort of looming presence #cod mw2 #mw2 #cod x reader #dnd!AU #Warlock!Soap #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #how the heck do you write for soap LMAO #maybe 2 more parts? or just one not sure yet! (: #DND!141 #Flesh and Bone

[skippyangel16]

The Couple Next Door my thoughts…

Link here for a ‘real’ review from that neck of woods👇

👏👏👏

👆This just about sums it up for me, a real review from a real paper not a paid promo success piece from Hello or channel 4 blowing its own trumpet. If you google the series IBMd has it rated 5.2/10 at the moment of writing. (Saying something is brilliant does not make it so, unless you want to brainwash. Kenneth springs to mind taking a whole year+ to talk up Belfast so he would finally get that Oscar for the not so outstanding Belfast 🙄)

The Guardian Nov 2023 promo it as The couple next door a sexy fantastic time …4 stars but then by the 3rd Dec it’s no longer raving about it with an honest review.👇

https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2023/dec/03/the-couple-next-door-channel-4-swingers-thriller-review-slow-horses-3-arena-being-kae-tempest-the-doll-fctory?CMP=share_btn_link Barbara Ellen exert from review 3 Dec 2023 still the guardian…

Exert from link above by Barbara Ellen..

Well for me TCND started off with a ‘OMG not again!’ for the opening shot. I said to hubby ‘I hate it when they do that!’. The second scene supposedly set in Leeds wtf? Why didn’t they find a more convincing housing estate…then (Sam) Danny picking up the washing machine…dear god it made me cringe and that’s just for starters!

Sam…I could not get past his ‘Yorkshire’ accent?… well he did his best, it came through well some of the time. It’s sad but production were aware they were not going to predominantly film in Yorkshire or substitute location with a suitable comparison so why the need for him to do a Yorkshire accent? They could have set this story anywhere. Why not let Sam do his normal Scottish accent ? Far more sexy! Bad decision imo.

I could go on…especially the ladies dress code for a casual UK BBQ, LMAO. For sure my neighbour and I need to up our game at our next one! Seductive dresses, tits out and heels on! Husbands can’t wait…🤣

Does it appear Sam was hired for his body?…absolutely! Is he typecast as the guy who does sex?…looks like it. If he wanted to up his stakes as a good actor imo this was not the project. Can he do chemistry with anyone but Caitriona?… barely, but this was his best effort so far. Sex scenes and build up no 🔥 for me. I found it more cringe so fast forward came into play. Seems Sam is okay with full nudity and grinding again so can’t wait for OL S8! No need for J&C sex scenes to be PG…

Continuity, script, direction, production…dear god did outlander do it?

Out of all the actors Jessica De Gouw (Becka) stood out with a consistent performance.

Gripping? Nah, wanted to give up many times but finally got past ep 3 and pace seemed to increase so eventually got to the end which was then suddenly abrupt.

I wanted to like it, but for me it was blah…should have been amazing! Fail is more down to script, direction and production, had a giggle most of the way through at the script and said wtf and why a lot? ….🤷‍♀️still they all had fun making it and got paid!

For those who thought it enjoyable and hot I am really pleased for you! Sex for sex sake came to my mind, script all over the place one minute quite good another that’s shit.

For me in the words of a true Yorkshire man…

Maybe if I had a couple of wines with the cheese and knew it was not going to be a quality drama but a cheesy soap it would have gone down better.

Strikes me his fate in life is to be an alcohol god, that’s his true path…acting gave him his wife and family and that’s all he needs from it. It appears it’s not in his destiny for it to do anything more than that…🤷‍♀️JMHO

So if you haven’t seen it and want to then I suggest lots of wine and lower your expectations to a tv movie or soap and you will probably enjoy it and think it’s better than it was…🤪

#tumblr #@skippyangel16 #post Dec 2023 #tcnd #review #sam heughan

[awkwardgtace]

Struggle To Trust

It has been a while. Finally got another mafia au story (something @definitely-not-knightress has been looking forward to!). Originally I was gonna split this, but I feel like I jump around themes a bit and it just works better as one story

TW: Mentions of death, bodies, blood, torture, dehumanization

Alessia gets a lead on what turned her mom human that crosses her path with two humans. She needs to keep them safe, but doesn't trust herself. Ash and Delphia think they finally get away from the giants that have been keeping them. Now they're facing an entirely new family. Can they trust them?

Struggle To Trust

“For the last time, where is it?!” Alessia screamed in Dominic’s face. Weeks of this. Weeks of screaming for him to say where hid the worst machine she could imagine. The one that made her mother human. 

Dominic laughed. Each and every time he laughed. The others had stopped by. Taken their own time trying to get information. The bruised man in front of her was stubborn. Unfortunately for him, so were the Kamias. He spat blood on the ground.

“I have nothing to tell you,” he laughed again. Alessia would forever hate his laugh. It was already stuck in her head. “Unless you want to hear some old plans again… I’ll always regret how close I came to having you together with your mother.”

Alessia punched him in the stomach. He coughed. She hated this. Hated this man. More than once he’d talked about the night she got lucky. That he’d set it all up on her birthday to take her down like her mother. She did get lucky, Ryder saved her by accident. 

“I bet you think we’re hunting this down to use it on you,” Alessia seethed. She brought her face close to him. “We’re not like you. We want to find out just what this can do. Protect anyone else you might have toyed with. You know how my brother is, we’ll get any information we want eventually.”

Dominic tried to head butt her. He was foolish, she wouldn’t get this close if he could touch her. There had to be a sign on how to deal with this. The Sulvan family was known well enough. Made their appearances when needed, but Dominic didn’t… Dominic spent most of his time at home, playing with his humans.

“You won’t find it. I know you won’t. If you’d been a plaything like I wanted then maybe you’d have some idea,” he laughed again.

For once, that laugh made her smile. The Sulvans were always big on gloating. At some point he had to mess up. Just as she needed. Alessia grabbed him by the hair and forced him to look up as she stood straight. Facing her how he always hated to.

“You just gave me a hint Dominic. If a plaything would know it has to be on your property. Something that happens to be part of the Kamia territory now thanks to your attack.”

“You bitch!” 

Alessia punched his stomach again before turning away. She pulled her phone out and dialed her father. He’d gather what and who was needed. 

“Alessia,” her father said. Quiet, he was in his room with her mother and siblings. They were going to be moved soon enough.

“Dad, we need to search the Sulvan house. There’s something there.”

“I’ll start setting it up now.”

The line died. She knew he’d get to work immediately. Finally a place to start. A place to find some answers. Maybe even a way to fix things…

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alessia sighed as she leaned against the back wall of the Sulvan estate. Both her brothers were busy. That left her and some trusted family members to search the estate. Everyone thought there would be something obvious. The only thing was how sick Dominic truly was. The mess, the leftovers, made her sick. Truly a monster.

The air helped to settle her stomach while the others kept searching. Just a short break. It made her miss her brothers; well not Ryder. She was glad he wasn’t here to see those horrors. Normally she thought she could manage all of this on her own, but this was a special case. One that made it hard to stay the stoic, cold-hearted, Kamia daughter. One too close to home.

“Quick this way,” a small voice hissed. Alessia perked up. There weren’t any humans when they checked the property originally. Could be some that were hiding, afraid they’d get killed. Might have even reached the property by accident. She moved her focus to the ground, but stayed where she was.

Alessia took in a deep breath. Flowers, two distinct scents of flowers. One was more earthy. A bit of shame settled in her heart as she swallowed. It was the human scents she preferred. Almost everyone else had a penchant for metallic scents. Floral ones usually got left out of mafia business; exactly why they hid Alessia’s personal preference. A Kamia who liked floral humans could start something.

“Shit, they had to come this way. Can’t let the Kamia girl get them!” Alessia growled a little when she heard that. Sulvans were taken off the property today. Her father spent all night making that happen; no one should be here that would hunt down a human.

“Come on, quick. They’ll catch up,” the same small voice. Alessia scanned the ground, still no sign of anything. She was prepared. Just in case she pulled out one of the doubles Felix gave her to carry. A quick stretch to hide popping it in her mouth.

Alessia shifted her feet slightly. Eyes focused at her feet, scanning for any human running by. The scent was stronger now. They were getting closer to her. She shifted again. This time she caught a shout, they were a lot closer than she realized. The grass here was overgrown just enough she couldn’t easily see a human.

The grass issue disappeared as two humans ran right into her foot. Her eyes went wide as she took them in. A pale, tiny woman with long ebony hair and a masculine looking person with brown hair and brown skin. She crouched down to see them better. Shocked to find the smell of blood coating the earthy floral scent. The black haired one stepped forward and tried to hide the other behind her. 

Alessia looked around, the others she heard hadn’t come close yet. She moved slowly to try and promise the little humans a bit of safety. The woman started shaking, the one behind her tried to glare up. Once they stumbled, Alessia knew she was out of time.

As always the feeling of grabbing humans left her feeling strange. She hated that part of this. That they had no control. She stood up straight before flipping her palm flat. Her fingers were moved up just enough she could see the two terrified faces staring at her.

“Over here!” Alessia snapped her head towards the voice as two giants rounded the corner of the house. They were Sulvan family members. She knew that. The two always followed Anton. The former next in line was trying to find a way to take back control of his family. It would make sense he hid humans. “Shit.”

“Didn’t my father demand all the humans your family currently owned?” she growled. The two stood straight and shared a look. She waited for an answer, a desperate hope the double in her mouth would be wasted.

“Did you idiots catch them yet?!” Anton’s voice made her stiffen. All the years he bullied her were far from forgotten. “If she gets them I won’t-”

“Sir!” one of the two in front of her shouted. Anton rounded the corner with a glare that could start a blaze. Alessia straightened her back as she faced the shorter giant. She was the stronger one now and from the deadlier family. He couldn’t hurt the humans she held anymore.

“Alessia, what a nice surprise. I thought none of the main family would be here today.” Anton walked closer, his eyes locked on the hand holding the two humans. She curled her fingers over them. Out of sight and with her meant safety for them.

“Now Anton, how could I leave something like this to be done without proper supervision.” 

“I mean you Kamias are a wonder. What exactly are you tearing my home apart for as it is?”

“Why would I tell you? Clearly you don’t listen to orders. Two humans here that you were supposed to hand over to us months ago. Maybe I should let Rhys come comb through the house. You know how great he is at sniffing out humans.” A smirk to show her fangs, the humans in her hand gasped. 

“Now, now Alessia. I just bought these two. That order was for all the ones we had under my father’s miserable leadership. If I remember right that is. We didn’t tend to keep many for long.”

“Oh and what was it I heard? What were you going to do if someone found these two?”

“Why I’d only be angry since they were a gift for you I know you have a penchant for flowers. I thought you’d enjoy the taste of a flowery human. How about you taste one right now?”

Alessia glared as Anton narrowed his eyes. It was clear he’d caught on to the problem within the Kamias. That or he knew about her mother and expected that to change how she acted. Neither one would matter after what she did next. A smirk, a lick of her lips, and two fingers to pinch the arm of the one in her hand that was bleeding. 

“I think I will, if they’re a gift I should try at least one. Shouldn’t I?” Alessia hummed.

She pulled the one bleeding up to her face. The woman was screaming, calling her a monster, as she did it. That didn’t matter. She met the eyes of the one in her grasp, green and blue. They would hate her, but that wasn’t new.

Alessia tilted her head back and dropped the human into her mouth. She’d been taught more than enough ways to look careless while keeping them safe. She moved them around her mouth, a purr slipped out at the taste she couldn’t help adoring. As she looked down to meet Anton’s eyes again she pushed the human beneath her tongue and propped the fake one between her teeth.

There was shock in the eyes of each giant watching her. As if they thought the Kamias would go soft after finding out the truth. A sad day for them, the Kamias wouldn’t go soft since they’d never been like the others in the first place. Alessia bit down humming at the flavor of the fake blood Felix filled the double with. It was sweeter than the last time, probably one meant for Rhys not her. She’d check when she got home.

Alessia swallowed the fake blood, but smiled while it stained her teeth. A show of licking it clean while Anton silently raged. He wanted these humans for something. Something she had to find out. It would be hard to get them to talk after this, but that was a future problem. She closed her lips and let out another purr.

“You weren’t wrong, floral humans are an interesting taste. Though I think I’d stick to the ones I usually have. Too sweet,” she grinned.

“In that case I’ll take the other-”

“Didn’t you say they were a gift? I plan to use the other one to see how it flavors my favorite wine. Now why don’t you leave like you’re supposed to and I won’t let anyone else in the main family know about you ignoring orders.”

“Of course,” he turned away, shoulders stiff. Each step was a barely covered stomp. She wasn’t shocked in the least. By him that is. The calm human in her mouth was another story. The one in her hand had fallen silent after the crunch of the double. That was expected. “We’ll just head out then.”

Alessia followed as soon as they were out of sight. She couldn’t hear much from them. Some mumbles of her causing a problem. Something that they wanted to find would stay hidden. It made her more confident this was the right choice. Alessia was done with her search for the day, the humans in her hand and mouth needed to be treated.

After a few minutes Alessia went back inside the house. She found her second in command for the search, the one her father trusted even Ryder with. One look at her hand was enough. A nod of understanding and she left. Luckily she took a car today, once inside she could pull the one in her mouth out.

“Alessia, leaving already?” Anton’s voice made her growl. She turned with a glare at him.

“Is there something you need Anton?” Alessia said. The car pulled up in front of her, she couldn’t deny it was a relief.

“I just thought the two of us could head to the estate together. Your father wanted to meet with me to discuss my new role as a branch of the Kamias.”

Alessia didn’t trust a thing he said. She pulled out her phone and sent a text. A grimace once it was confirmed that Anton was called to the main house. She growled again, but put her phone away. The human she held would be a bigger problem now. He’d try and take her.

“Why would I waste time with you?” Alessia was desperate to avoid this.

“Now, now. We’re part of the same family now aren’t we? Going to keep holding grudges from childhood?”

Always pressing the right buttons. Alessia growled again, closed her fist around the human she held, and pulled open the car door. She slid in and waved at Anton to follow. One day he’d pay just like his father once they found what they needed. She wanted to be there when this man died. She’d never forget the day she’d nearly killed a human in fear of him.

Anton slid into the car, an awful stench of cologne hit her. She hadn’t noticed a thing when there was open air. The door slammed, locking her in with an awful person and a sickening scent. She growled again as he slid closer to her. His eyes were locked on her hand with the human woman. Alessia had learned more than enough since then; humans were safe with her.

“Driver, why don’t you give us some privacy?” Anton said. Alessia met the driver’s eyes in the window. One shake of her head kept them from the privacy he supposedly wanted. Anton leaned back, an arm draped over her shoulders.

“We’re all family aren’t we? Why would you need to keep it from another member?” she asked. The human in her mouth started to move. They were pushing against her tongue, but the best she could do was lift it a little bit. The one in her hand was fighting fiercely, likely assuming the fist would be a death sentence.

“I thought it would be nice to have a bit of time to ourselves. After all, your father will likely put us together, have his daughter head a branch family.”

“My father wouldn’t expect me to marry anyone unless I chose them. He’s not a Sulvan after all.”

“Don’t be so testy. Who knows what I could offer that would have him encourage us? You wouldn’t break a deal he made for someone important, would you?” Anton’s hand met her shoulder. A squeeze that made her glare right in his eyes. Something sick was in them. Something wrong. She never wanted to know what this man had in his head.

“What the hell are you implying?”

“Nothing to make you so testy dear.”

Alessia growled, but the house in view helped calm her. Each word from the monster next to her had the humans shake or fight. Whatever he wanted them for was likely a fate worse than death. The moment the car stopped Alessia hopped out. Anton growled as he was forced to let her go. That was the only hint of anger once he stepped out of the car. The grin on his face made her anxious. She turned on her heel towards the house. She took a careful taste of the human. It was calming, but that left her full of guilt.

She opened the door to find her father sitting in a chair waiting.  She nodded to him and lifted her fist slightly. He nodded back. He tilted his head to the side and mouthed ‘Laura?’. She nodded. Once Anton was gone he’d bring the doctor. The human in her mouth wasn’t in danger or she’d bring them to Laura now.

“Anton, good to see you, my office is this way,” her father said. The two humans froze once he spoke. 

Alessia watched the two walk off before heading to the kitchen. She grabbed some food and made her way upstairs. At least she had a lot of items for humans in her room. Anton’s look stuck in her mind, she swore these two would be safe. Until she knew what he wanted they wouldn’t leave her sight. 

Alessia set the food down on a table as she entered her room. She had the only attached bathroom, a bonus today. She dropped the tiny woman off in the sink.

“Just fucking kill me already!” the woman shouted. Alessia shuddered; knowing she deserved it never made it easier. “You monster!”

Alessia turned the water on to what should be a safe temperature. A soft stream until Anton left. A sigh, a shake of her arms, and one last taste. Finally, she stuck her fingers in her mouth and pulled out the one who had been bleeding. They looked at her calmly, almost kindly, as she assessed them. Nothing bad had happened, no mistakes. She set them down next to the woman.

“What… but I saw…” The woman gave up on words and tackled the other person. Alessia smiled. She set a towel she kept nearby down near the two. Added a bit of soap on the side where she knew they could reach. Another deep breath before she prepared to speak again.

“Go ahead and get cleaned up, I’ll come back in a little while,” she whispered. Now it was time to wait until her dad brought Laura.

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Delphia couldn’t speak. Ash was alive, but she watched the giant lick their blood off her teeth. She dragged them towards the water. With the warm stream to clean her hands, she searched every inch possible for signs of a new injury. They were bleeding from the claws earlier, but nothing fatal. Nothing that she couldn’t help them survive.

“I thought I really lost you this time,” she whispered. Ash didn’t fight her as she forced them under the water. The last time giants put them in a sink the water was freezing. She didn’t mind getting soaked as she pulled torn cloth away from where it stuck to them.

“She had something in her mouth, it was filled with something sweet,” Ash mumbled.

Instead of answering, she walked over to the soap the giant left behind. She leaned forward to smell it first, there wasn’t much of a scent. That was a bonus, less likely for them to be hunted down. With one hand full she walked back to Ash. She covered two fingers with soap and started to clean their wounds. They hissed.

“I know,” she whispered. “Just let me clean these. We don’t want them infected.”

Ash grunted, but grabbed her arm. The few squeezes reassured her. The process felt too long, those giants they ran from hurt Ash a lot. Stupid claws and fangs. All it did was make both of them quiet. No way would they talk for giants like that. They’d both rather die.

“You should clean up too,” Ash said as they moved their arm to grab some soap from her hand. Her arms stung from some lighter marks as Ash forced her sleeves up. They ran the soap against her skin. They’d get out of this, survive. Find a way to leave this town, to a place they could be safe. As long as she and Ash were together nothing could go wrong. “At least yours are light.”

“I guess that’s a little lucky for us.”

They settled into a calm silence. Moments of peace were rare for them, especially once the giants noticed how they felt for each other. Each one was a precious treasure she held to her heart in greed. The fear was worth it just for those rare smiles on Ash’s face. Their eyes promised similar thoughts.

Eventually the soap was gone and they were as clean as they would get. Ash took the initiative as they dragged Delphia over to the towel the giant left out. It didn’t get wet the entire time. A precise placement. Delphia pulled Ash against her once they pushed her to sit. They pulled some of the towel to cover them both.

It was warm, almost comforting. Delphia couldn’t remember the last time the two could sit like this. No fear of what would be said, when someone would find them. In that house they had to be careful. Hide and prepare for when a giant would try and use them. The one thing their silence promised was that they could stay together and alive. Both swore if the other died by those giants they’d kill themself in return. A method that the giants knew was no empty threat.

“You should sleep,” Ash whispered. They started to run a hand through her hair. Delphia shook her head. This wasn’t the time to sleep. She had to stay awake to take in all the time they had together. There was no telling what the giants planned to do with them next. Toys, pets, something else entirely. She wanted- no needed- this moment.

“Later, I promise,” she whispered. The hand running through her hair never stopped. Ash shifted to hold her tighter against them.

The calm moment had a timer attached. A loud knock signaled the end. It lasted long enough for them to dry off at least. 

Delphia pressed against Ash, scared of what came next. They tightened their hold on her. It was hard to admit that this giant scared her more. Before they had a promise of safety, knowledge the giants needed to take revenge. Now… now they had nothing.

“Hey,” the giant woman’s voice was melodic. A cruel lie in the face of danger. “Are you two done in here? I don’t want to leave you in the sink forever.”

Ash’s arms tightened around her. The steps were lighter than normal as they approached, but it didn’t change anything. The comforting dim light beneath the towel was replaced with a bright all encompassing one. As soon as her eyes adjusted Delphia was forced to stare up at rosy skin and brown eyes. Long hair, almost blue like the night sky hovered near her and Ash. If these features were on a human she might start to fall for the woman. Too bad it was a giant.

“Guess you two are done then,” the woman smiled. Delphia held Ash tightly, finally returning their hug. Massive hands came down around them, but the move was careful. Almost painfully so. Together they were pushed onto a soft, warm palm. Something she knew not to trust.

The giant woman pulled them up from the sink and held them near her. It was a kinder hold than Delphia had ever experienced. Ash loosened their hold on her, as if they felt safe. It was strange, wrong. Giants weren’t safe. Their steps shook the world. They could and have casually killed humans. She’d seen it more than once, experienced it. Ash too. Neither could forget that day.

The hands were moving again. Delphia hadn’t even noticed the steps. Another oddity. They tilted to let her and Ash off on a table. A table that had beds and clothes, human beds and clothes. Even a small spot for the two to use for getting changed. Some food was set to the side too. None of this made sense.

There wasn’t even a chance to think about it before another giant showed up. His steps shook the table, a stern glare that made Delphia panic. She wasn’t used to giants having eyes the same color as her own. Even worse having them locked on her as he came closer and closer. Ash’s arms were around her again, she wasn’t sure they ever left. This massive white haired giant crouched and put his hand on the table.

Another human was in his hand. A doctor if the white coat could be believed. The last time either saw a doctor was impossible to remember. Maybe before the one who captured them was killed. Possibly longer, one of the ones that had been kept with them was a doctor. She couldn’t remember when they died… They might have been one of the last ones.

The human doctor didn’t seem bothered at all by the giants. Not even with how pale she knew Ash looked. Once she cleared everything off the giant’s hand, with help from him even, both the giants walked away. The table shook, but the doctor kept working on setting something up for them. Delphia started to get scared. Something awful could come of this, something that would kill her and Ash.

“Alright then,” the doctor clapped. “I’m Laura, if one of you would come over here we can get you checked out.”

Silence. Stillness. Until Ash’s arms were pulled away. Delphia watched them walk towards this Laura person. Signs of age on the woman’s face at least gave Delphia hope they could survive. She watched Ash go sit in a chair that was under some machine. The woman lifted their shirt to see wounds and bruises. Delphia hugged herself, she didn’t want to be checked over.

“Oh my, it seems I was called just in time,” Laura murmured. “You’ve lost a lot of blood, frankly a shock you’re still awake. We’ll get started on closing these wounds and then look at getting a transfusion.”

“There’s no blood here,” Ash spoke up. Kind of a shock for Delphia, they preferred silence.

“Oh, well yes. If we’re lucky you match someone in the family, otherwise I’ll get some fluids and will need to monitor you until you’re more stable.”

Delphia couldn’t watch anymore, not after the face Ash made. As if a giant would help them even if their blood types matched. They both could remember the one time the one who used them wanted another giant to do that. She shuddered at the memory of that human’s scream. Never learned their name.

They’d be fine. The giant checked a long time ago. Both had rare types, especially rare in giants. Nothing could go wrong before they escape. She tried to push the thoughts and memories away. A sweep of the room showed a number of easy to climb places for them. Ones right where she knew giants commonly kept humans, at least if what she’d seen told her anything. It almost looked like the place was meant to have humans walking around. 

“Miss, I’m ready for you,” Laura called. Delphia grimaced, but walked to the set up. Ash had been moved to the floor so Delphia took their seat. She squeezed her eyes shut as hands touched her clothes. A check of her stomach and chest went mostly fine, a few gasps. Then the doctor moved to her arms. “Oh god.”

“They’re old,” Delphia grumbled.

A small kindness that the woman didn’t press to learn about Delphia’s scars. Bad attempts to draw blood by a giant for experiments. Times she was held too tightly, didn’t move fast enough. Things she never wanted to live through again. Her arms worked, what they looked like didn’t matter.

“Alright, I see you both are malnourished. I’ll write a meal plan up for you to follow. What Alessia brought should be fine for now. Then about that transfusion…” Laura said. Ash grabbed Delphia’s hand as the woman spoke. They were safe, things were fine. “Oh good you’re a match with-”

“He wants what!?” the giant woman’s voice broke through the closed door. Delphia ignored whatever the doctor had to say, focused on the shouting giant. Even more so as the door opened. “I’ll kill him.”

“Calm down,” the white haired one said. He was loud, not like the ones chasing them though. “We’ll deal with him. For now you know what the situation is.”

Both giants approached. Ash’s grip on Delphia’s hand tightened. A shiver ran down her spine as the doctor stepped forward to greet them. It took until then for Delphia to register the woman said Ash matched someone…

“Ash,” she whispered. A squeeze. Both knew. They’d promised a long time ago to die together. She managed to look in their eyes; she hated the look they gave her. She hated the way they squeezed her hand; how it seemed to want her to keep going if they were gone.

“Vitus,” Laura shouted. Delphia squeezed Ash’s hand. Slid off the chair to sit next to them. A tight hug, a prayer that they’d survive. “One of them needs a transfusion. According to my records, Ryder should be a match.”

The eyes of the white haired giant settled on them. She glared back. When he killed them she’d make sure he didn’t ever get a tear. She wasn’t expecting a nod.

“Alright, he’s downstairs. I’ll take you to him.”

A hand was placed down, the doctor hopped on. The white haired one left and they were both alive. Alive and left alone with the giant who brought them here. That very giant woman sat down in front of them. An elbow hit the table. Delphia followed the arm it was attached to all the way up to the woman’s face. A slight frown.

“You two are gonna be staying with me for a while. We’ll have a better set up brought in sometime tomorrow,” the giant woman said. “I’m Alessia, just let me know if there’s anything you need and I’ll get it for you.”

Alessia smiled. Delphia loved and hated the smile all at once. It made an already beautiful face look better. Kind, warm, almost to a point she could call it caring. Yet the fangs stood out. Bits of red from whatever looked like blood stuck to the massive teeth. This was the smile of a giant. A smile that could never be trusted.

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alessia sat on the floor next to her door. She couldn’t sleep. The humans left her anxious. All she could think about was if they tried to run. If they fell from the table, hurt themselves to get away. Here she could watch… Plus watching them distracted her from Anton and the fact he wanted her.

“Ash and Delphia,” she mumbled. The names helped her heart calm. The silence after telling them her own name made her sure they’d just be ‘little humans’ the whole time. 

She placed her head against the wall. Eyes stuck on the dark ceiling. There had to be a way to help them feel calm. A day out in a different city maybe. There had to be things they needed or wanted they could buy. With a sigh she closed her eyes.

The next thing she knew, Rhys was shaking her. His usual way to wake her up. A growl followed by pushing him away showed it worked. He looked worried, he was always worried. At first she wanted to argue with him, but noticed the open door behind him. She shot up, relieved to see Felix at the table. At least until she saw how stiff he was.

“Please, I just want to give you better clothing,” her older brother murmured. Rhys grabbed her arm to help her stand as they watched Felix struggling.

“Dad filled us in,” Rhys whispered. “Others will come by in a few hours to set up their place in here.  Felix wanted to get better clothes. We were gonna let you sleep until we were done, but someone’s being difficult.”

Alessia crept closer, doing her best to keep her steps light. It didn’t feel this hard usually. Then again she didn’t usually know the humans that hated her were sticking around. She reached Felix and looked over his shoulder. Ash and Delphia were huddled together in between the beds. She could even see them shaking. It made her whine.

“Ash, Delphia,” she whispered. That got a glare from Delphia. Clearly not happy hearing their names said, at the very least around others. “This is just Felix, he means it. It’s just to get some better clothes.”

Silence. Glares. Then Ash moved. She couldn’t believe it. Delphia clearly hated the idea. She held their clothes as they walked. Something was said. Something she couldn’t hear. Regardless it brought Ash out to stand in front of Felix while Delphia stayed behind. Ash stared up at her the whole time. They did as instructed, but those eyes never left hers.

“Thank you,” Felix said. She could hear how worn out he was. This never got any easier. Delphia walked up then, standing how Felix had instructed at first. Arms up straight out at her sides, make herself look like a ‘T’. “Could you take off your sweater?”

Delphia’s eyes were full of fear. She hugged herself and Ash ran up to her. It hurt a bit to see the way the two acted. Admittedly she felt a little jealous; couldn’t help finding them cute. Felix stiffened, she put a hand on his shoulder. He never did like this part. He was so much softer than he looked.

“I-I…” Felix looked back at her.

“Delphia, he just asked. You don’t have to,” she breathed. Another conversation she couldn’t hear. It wasn’t the first time she wished she could be small enough to join those whispers and it wouldn’t be the last. This was the first time it hurt so much she wanted to leave. Take away the need for hushed whispers.

Eventually Delphia walked forward again. She held her arms out, sweater firmly left on. Felix nodded, leaning closer to the tiny woman. It only took a few minutes for him to finish, but Delphia shook the whole time. Felix at least managed to keep himself from acknowledging her fear. He’d gotten good at that over the years.

“All done,” he whispered. Rhys came over and rested his arms on her head. “I’ll have some new clothes for you two sometime tomorrow.”

“Ok, well Felix and I should get going,” Rhys sighed. His weight against her disappeared along with a grunt from Felix. “Alessia, you should head out before they come in too.”

“Right,” she nodded. Her brothers left and she was once again alone with Ash and Delphia. The two shared more whispers. “Well, we’re going to need to leave today. I’ll be back in a minute.”

A quick few steps to grab clothes, enter her bathroom, and change. Although she slowed as she started to tie her tie. The shirt she wore didn’t have additions like her dad’s did in the pockets. She’d need one of his. She sighed, turning to leave. A knock on her bathroom door made her jump.

“I brought you one of dad’s shirts,” Rhys said. Her younger brother was always a step ahead. “One he uses when Ryder gets sick.”

She opened the door, took it, “Thanks.” and shut it quickly.

“I’ll send you a message when they’re done. Dad said they’d be here in an hour. Should be done early in the afternoon.”

“Got it.”

Alessia slipped off her tie and shirt. Swapping to her dad’s, one that made her feel small. She wished it made her smaller too. She bundled the excess near the small of her back. A look in the mirror almost made it suit her. She sighed, rushing to tie the tie instead. An hour could pass too quickly. 

When she left the bathroom Rhys was crouched by the table. She could tell by his smirk the two humans probably weren’t happy about it. Knowing him he said something about her liking flowers or sweet drinks or worse. She walked up and tried not to let herself growl.

“Hey sis,” she knew she’d hate what next left his mouth, “no wonder you caught them. Strong flowers. Your favorite.”

“Rhys,” she growled. A full blown one. The humans on the table flinched, it made her feel guilty. She hated being a giant. “Just make sure I know when I can come back.”

“Aye, aye,” he saluted her. He stood, looking down; taller than her but a match to Felix. Sometimes she wondered if that was why Ryder liked them both so much. Taller than so many others, but still shorter than dad.

Alessia pushed off her thoughts and crouched next to the table. A small smile that landed with neither human reacting. She held in a sigh. It would be hard to get trusted, but she wanted that. These two wouldn’t be in danger as long as she was around.

“So, I guess you two mostly heard,” she started, “we have to go out today. Just not be in my room at least. Last night I thought maybe we could go to another town, get stuff you need.”

“Why?” Delphia spoke. That was a bonus. Ash was the only one who spoke the night before.

“We don’t want anyone seeing you.”

“You have us, why does it matter if we’re seen?” She hadn’t heard that much venom from a human in a long time. Weirdly reassuring.

“We don’t want to risk the wrong person finding out you two are here. We’re careful about who comes into the house, but don’t want to take any risks. You’ll have to stay in my pocket most of the time, even in another city.”

Alessia set down one of her hands. She tried never to grab humans outside of emergencies. She still hated the feeling of a human in her fist. She was always nervous she’d make a mistake in her need to save them. One that would kill them instead.

Ash walked forward almost immediately. She kind of liked how they appeared to trust her. Delphia trailed behind. Both climbed on after a shared look. Slowly she curled her fingers up and pulled the two close. It might not be the best method, but she dropped them into her pocket. Small grunts filled her with guilt.

It was easier than she liked to push that guilt away. Steady steps to leave her home, to pretend there were no humans on her person. Each step felt heavy. Walking out into a world where they were in danger. Where it would be better to leave them hidden in the house somewhere. She motioned to one of the others around today that she needed a car and walked into the kitchen.

A quick pastry grab and she went outside. Annoyed taps of her foot until the car came around. She immediately closed the privacy screen and pulled her passengers out of her pocket. She held them near the hand that had a pastry.

“Thought we could all use some breakfast,” she smiled. There was less fear from the two as they looked up to her. Small hands grabbed some of the flaky bread. Smiles she felt gifted to see graced their faces. They’d start following the meal plan tomorrow.

“This is good,” Delphia whispered. 

Alessia calmed. Leaning back to try and enjoy the most of the ride that she could. It wasn’t a long drive, but long enough for them to eat. Minutes passed in silence as she watched the two. Something about them brought up memories. Times back when she had snuck her toy castle out to the humans on the run.

By the time the two were finished she’d thoroughly lost herself to her memories. One called her name so she pulled them close, letting them jump down into her pocket instead. She finished the pastry, thinking of when she snuck out food. Brought medical supplies. Even the scents she barely remembered.

Once at the city it was easier to knock herself into reality. She wasn’t sure what they could need. Food and clothes would be covered by her family. Same for housing. Instead she stopped off to the side and looked down at her pocket.

“Is there anything you two want to do?” she whispered. “There’s a lot in this city. As long as we don’t leave you too out in the open there shouldn’t be any reason to worry.”

In her mind she pictured the two whispering. The more it happened the more it hurt. She couldn’t help being interested in them. Cute, brave, smelled amazing, and she was desperate to learn more about them. It wouldn’t happen.

“Is there a place we could be out of your pocket?” Ash asked.

A pause to think. There weren’t many places that were safe and she could guarantee no one could walk in. This town had too many eyes to risk them just anywhere. She had one place she did frequent. A spot that no one else knew she went… “There’s a place. I’ll take us there now.”

There was a bit of pep to her step as Alessia made her way. This was something she hid from everyone. Every time she visited this town. After nights where she was called a monster, the times she failed. One place that at least made her feel at peace.

As she walked her steps slowed. It was strange. The fear of sharing this place with the humans in her pocket started to creep in. It wasn’t as if they could hurt her or take this place from her. Yet she feared what they’d think. Would they hate it? Love it? Find it strange? Peaceful? Calm? A hundred questions that she couldn’t answer until she arrived. Answers she’d have after one small conversation that would start as soon as she opened the door she’d reached.

“Allie? I wasn’t expecting you today. You didn’t call ahead,” the woman who owned her favorite place spoke. Alessia smiled, a fake name for a fake life. Important to keep this hidden. 

“I was in the neighborhood, can I take the day?” she asked. The woman in front of her checked a computer, hummed a few times, then offered a smile.

“Looks good, go right in. Same card as usual?”

“Yep.”

Alessia waved as she walked away. A cool air passed her by as she made her way deeper in. She shivered. Excitement or nerves she couldn’t tell. Soon she’d share her safe place with someone else. Somewhere no one else was allowed to know of… A garden that made her feel small.

Finally at the door, she pushed it open. The warmth was a stark contrast to the cool building. It had to be warm. She slowly made her way to her usual spot. Hidden under a tree in the shade. Surrounded by dahlias, lilies, and roses. It never made sense how they all grew together, but she loved it. Especially now, they’d just watered them. A fresh, kind smell.

“We’re here,” Alessia whispered. 

She slid down, her back against the tree. A careful movement to reach inside her pocket. Both humans squirmed as her fingers wrapped around them. Another quick shift that was probably too fast. She placed her hand down, flattened her fingers and waited. Smelling the humans with this place explained her interest. Together they made up her safe place.

“Where are we?” Delphia’s awed voice was good. No anger or fear meant maybe she understood.

“Some gardens I know about,” Alessia kept her voice as quiet as possible. Afraid it would break the awe if they looked at her. “I come here when I need a break. I pay to get this place all to myself… It’s just the three of us here.”

“This is amazing,” Ash said. She smiled, it was how she felt when she found it. Wandering after her first night in a bar. The feeling of peace that this place gave her. The trees and flowers that somehow made her feel small.

 “Yeah, yeah it is…”

Alessia watched the two walk away from her. She could see the stress and fear left behind as they did. Once they were far enough she moved. Turning away from the tree to lie back where she could stay near them. Smiles that made her heart pound met her on two tiny faces. She wanted more time like this.

It was a dream as the day passed. Delphia talked about the flowers around them. Happy and smiling in a way that suited her. Ash wound up sitting against Alessia. She was sure they were just using her as some shade. It was peaceful. Delphia even sent a smile towards Alessia. This place had never felt better.

Hour after hour things felt normal. A part of her wondered if this was the life she could have had. Outside the mafia, a normal city. That wasn’t ever in the cards for her. Even in another city she was too tall. A problem that would pose a risk. That could hurt humans by mistake. A monster.

“How did you find this place?” Ash asked. 

“Chance,” Alessia whispered. Ash still sat against her. Delphia across from them. At this point it was almost possible to forget about reality. “No one else knows about it. Not my dad or brothers. I feel kind of small when I’m here… Not so much of a giant…”

“What do you-”

Delphia’s voice was cut off by the sound of Alessia’s phone. She growled a little which made Ash move away from her. The spell that made this almost feel normal broke. She pulled her phone from her pocket and read the name. Rhys.

“Hello,” she answered.

“Hey. You’re good to come back any time. Felix also got some new clothes done today. He said it’s not enough, but it works,” Rhys started laughing. “Ryder played model for one of them. Apparently they’re the same height.”

“Great. Thanks Rhys.”

“Oh one more thing. I heard something about those two.”

Alessia sat up. One eyebrow raised as she looked at the two humans. “Should I know?”

“They’re Anton’s bargaining chips. Somehow they connect to what we’ve been looking for. Couldn’t get anymore info, they realized they were in public and shut up before the good stuff. Seems like he wants it to get you.”

“Right…” She had to remember to lower the volume on her phone. It was clear Ash and Delphia heard. Both had started to back away, a look of fear. “Just means we keep them safe.”

That was all it took for the call to end. A few minutes of silence passed as she thought. They knew something. At least Anton thought they knew something. Alessia pushed herself up to a sitting position. One leg was left straight while she pulled the other close. At least they would be safe with her.

“So… whenever you want we can go home,” she whispered. Ash and Delphia had backed away while she sat up. The time without fear was gone. She could see how horrified they were. Little nods as they walked close. That hint of another life was gone.

Everything felt blurred together once she dropped them back in her pocket. Quick goodbyes to the one who owned the garden. Easy trip back to the car, she didn’t even raise the privacy screen. Back at the house Rhys opened the car and pulled her out quickly.

“Careful,” she managed. Ryder was on Rhys’s shoulder this time, he at least smiled at her. That made it feel easier. One human that never thought she was a monster. Not even when they first met.

Rhys dragged her through the house right to her room. On the table was one of the portable houses they often bought. It had most of what humans would need; bathroom, bedrooms, shower, no kitchen though. That needed more than these places could manage. It wasn’t that bad though. It was better than just beds out in the open.

Finally allowed to walk on her own, she stepped forward. A slow crouch to be in front of the table. Then she reached into her pocket, surrounded the humans with her fingers. No squirms, just two limp little bodies. If she couldn’t feel their small chests heaving she’d think they were dead. Slowly she pulled them out and flattened her hand in front of the house. Rhys made them jump when he fell to the floor next to her. Ryder climbed down from him as the two in her hand stood.

“Come on,” Ryder said with a wave. “I’ll show you around. Probably better than the Sulvan family gave you.”

Alessia watched Ash and Delphia climb off her palm. Ash tugged Delphia as they followed Ryder. Before they disappeared both gave her a look of shock. A look without fear. It was nice, she felt like the afternoon was almost coming back. She swore to herself that she’d keep them safe; even if it killed her.

The next few weeks were filled with fleeting moments of calm. Times Ash and Delphia would smile at her. When she could hear their laughter. The hushed conversations were slowly disappearing. It was the most normal she felt around humans other than Ryder in a long time. Enough that she even felt a little hope towards seeing her mother once they were both ready. She started to think maybe, just maybe she wasn’t a monster.

That feeling only lasted until one night she left her bathroom door open a little. The two were on her dresser near the door. She thought it was fine. Until she heard them talking.

“You know we can’t tell her,” Delphia said.

“Are you sure? Things have been different,” Ash said. They sounded sad. Alessia slipped closer to the door. Desperate to hear this hushed conversation. One hand on the doorknob as she listened.

“She’s still a giant Ash. Once she knows she’ll kill us… just like the others wanted to.”

“Del, I think she’s different. I think all of these ones are different.”

“We can’t take that chance. You know what happened the last time we did.”

Alessia pushed open the door, ending the conversation. She tried to smile as she offered them a hand. One trip to their house then out of her room. She knocked the right rhythm on Rhys’s door to have him keep an eye out. Then went downstairs. Through the living room. To the kitchen. Down another set of stairs into a cellar full of wine. She grabbed the first bottle near her and opened it. 

She’d been foolish. They would always see her as a monster. Ryder probably did. Her mother and youngest siblings would. All humans would. Back against the wall, Alessia sank to the floor. She brought the bottle to her lips and took a gulp. She should be used to this…

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ash ran their fingers through Delphia’s hair. Alessia had been gone for hours, but they noticed one of the others looking in now and then. He’d called himself Rhys, it was clear he played mind games. They never forgot what he said that first day. ‘Be nice to her, she’s more sensitive than you’d think.’

They’d noticed it. Delphia had too. Little ways that the giant woman’s face changed when they showed fear. Hesitation. Trust. They knew what the other giants wanted. Before it was obvious; they talk and they die. Now it felt more like if they talked then they’d get more freedom. Possibly even closer to the giant woman. Something they both wanted even if Delphia would deny it. She wasn’t good at hiding her interest. Especially as the reluctance to climb on Alessia’s palms clearly came from embarrassment at the proximity.

A crash made them jump. The door opened. It didn’t stop them from running fingers through Delphia’s hair. Although they did start to slip out from next to her. The lack of giants in the room made the creak of the floor as someone walked around echo. It wasn’t Alessia’s steps, too heavy. They managed to climb off the bed and look out one of the windows.

The other brother, Felix, was carrying Alessia around the room. He brought her to the giant bed. With more care than Ash expected, Alessia was let go on the bed. She rolled away, it felt odd that they could even see from the window sometimes. Left right in a spot to watch a sleeping mountain all they wanted. For Ash, it was kind of reassuring.

Felix turned towards them. It was easy to tell when his golden eyes met their own. A change in their face. That was why Ash knew they weren’t noticed. Felix walked closer, his shadow sent a chill straight through their bones. They backed away from the window. As soon as the steps stopped they worried the house might be lifted. A heavy sigh came from the giant over them.

“I knew one of us should have watched you instead,” Felix mumbled.

Ash stepped closer to Delphia. They ran a hand through her hair again. Desperately waiting for the steps to leave. Far off the door closed and they let out a relieved sigh. That relief died quickly when a new much louder thump sounded nearby. Ash rushed to the window. Shocked to find Alessia kneeling on the ground.

In a way that seemed comical Alessia shifted to have her hands on the ground. She started crawling towards them, her eyes already red. It made them nervous. Those nerves didn’t make the giant woman stop from crawling closer. The crawls started to shake the house they were in, Delphia jumped up as it happened. She was beside them in seconds watching together as Alessia came closer and closer.

Ash grabbed Delphia’s hand once Alessia was close enough to reach them. The other woman kept moving. She crawled right by them. Ash brought Delphia with them as they went to the door. Just in time for a loud thump. They stepped out to see Alessia’s head against the table squinting at the house.

“I wanna fit in there,” she whispered. Ash took a few steps away from the door, Delphia had pulled her hand away to stay behind. “I wouldn’t be a monster if I could fit in there.”

“A monster?” they repeated. Alessia’s eyes filled with tears immediately.

 “I know I am.” Tears streamed out of the brown eyes. Ash’s heart hurt. Delphia came out, even approached Alessia because of the tears. It was hard not to trust the eyes that had been warm since they met. “I don’t wanna be. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t…” Delphia tried. She looked back at them, but there were no words to say. Suddenly Alessia’s fingers came close. Attention successfully grabbed, she brought her hand back to her lips.

“Don’t tell anyone, but I’m super scared of being around humans. Super duper scared.”

“You’re… scared of us?” Delphia stepped closer when she spoke.

“I don’t wanna hurt anyone ever again. Never again. I’ve been good right? Have I hurt either of you? I’m trying hard not to.” Alessia mumbled incoherently as sobs started to rack through her body. It caused tremors through the table, not enough for Ash to care.

They walked past Delphia. A hope to calm Alessia from her crying. Instead the giant head backed away and a whine pierced the room. They furrowed their brow. Another whine made them jump, but it didn’t change anything. Alessia sobbed more.

“I didn’t wanna hurt Alex. I stopped Anton from eating him. B-but I held too tight. It would have been my fault if he died. It’ll be my fault if you die. I won’t let you. I won’t hurt you. I won’t even hold you again.” A few sniffles. “Please don’t think I’m a monster.”

“I don’t think you are.” Ash didn’t want to hide it. There was nothing about the woman crying in front of them to seem like a monster. She’d been kind, careful, warm… She reminded them of someone they almost met a long, long time ago. What felt like another lifetime.

“Alex…” Delphia whispered. They knew the name too, but there was no reason to assume it was the same. Alex died a long time ago.

Alessia’s hand was brought up next to them. Delphia ran up and hugged their arm. As the shadow covered them they flinched. It caused a pause in whatever was happening. The sobs picked up again just as they looked to the brown eyes. Rivers. That’s all they could see as tears rolled down plump cheeks.

“See?” her voice was a breath. Almost inaudible. Even to Ash. Even to Delphia. “I scare you…” A sniffle. “Sola and Luna are smaller than you… I bet they’ll hate me when I work up the courage to talk to them…”

“Who are they?” Delphia asked. Alessia’s hand moved again. A finger left on Delphia’s chest.

“I bet my baby brother and sister aren’t even this tall next to you. They’ll be so scared. I can’t ever get close. I might hurt them.” That was the warning before a fresh river fell from the brown eyes. They thought those eyes were beautiful when Alessia smiled. Now they only caused pain in Ash’s heart.

Ash reached out to the finger that was pressed to Delphia’s chest. The trembling of the digit shook both of them. They cast a glance Delphia’s way, she was just as concerned. This wasn’t a giant that would hurt them. This was someone who cared. All their doubts and fears were more than just misplaced. Those feelings were bringing pain to the one person who had ever offered them comfort.

“I bet when my mom finally sees us she’ll hate me… I always wanted to be like her,” Alessia took in a shuddering breath as she spoke. It pulled Ash forward, they didn’t care. “When I was little she was so strong. Coming home with all the humans she saved. She never made a mistake, never hurt anyone. She is… she was a hero. I bet she still would be if I wasn’t so weak. Wouldn’t have been targeted if I didn’t make the Sulvan family hate me.”

“Is she gone?” Ash asked. Their fingers dug into her skin. The massive head shook, the table quaked from it. “Where is she?”

A new round of sobs. A new batch of pain. All from a giant who had so gently cared for them, talked to them, tried to help them feel at peace. Delphia’s hands joined their own on Alessia’s finger. They looked back at her, she was worried. It was obvious. This was possibly the only giant who managed to worm into their hearts after all this time.

“She’s like you… They made her human,” A wet growl followed the words. No force behind it, no menace. “Tortured her… think we even killed my baby siblings. I hate them… hate what they do, but maybe I’m just like them.”

“How could you be like them?” Delphia asked. Ash smiled as her hands started to pet the finger against her chest.

“I’m a monster… I like how you smell. How you taste. If I was different…” A new river. “It doesn’t matter; I’m close enough. I’m a monster.”

They watched Alessia yawn despite her constant stream of tears. Her body shook. Ash dug their fingers deeper into her skin. If they weren’t watching so closely they’d think she didn’t care, but they saw it. They saw the moment her eyes squinted in response. Delphia paused on petting the finger for a bit then pulled it into a hug.

“I… I’m afraid of you. Of everyone here. That you’ll take Ash away. Kill us both,” Delphia whispered. Ash nodded. “I think that white haired giant is monstrous. Those two brothers of yours are insane. But…”

Alessia sniffled. Ash smiled. They slid their hand on the finger to hold Delphia’s. A squeeze of encouragement.

“But, I don’t think you’re a monster. I think… I know I’m scared because if I’m wrong about you I don’t know what to do. The last giant I trusted… she sold us out. Gave us to the people we tried to run away from. I don’t know how to act if someone does that again.”

Another round of sobs. This time Alessia’s finger was pulled away. The massive woman shook the table as she pushed herself up. Her head took up the entire sky, waves of deep blue hair surrounded them. It felt safe. Something Ash didn’t think could exist again. Not after they were captured as children so long ago. Almost free and then those giant adults showed up…

“I would never let you be taken,” Alessia’s voice was loud and strong. A tone so severe Ash couldn’t even imagine the woman failing unless her heart stopped beating. An aroma of mint wafted around them as the giant over them moved.

“I believe you,” Ash and Delphia said in unison. Delphia grabbed their hand, a squeeze they understood. There was something brewing in their hearts in regards to the woman hovering over them.

A moment of peace. Brown eyes shining as tears fell around them. It actually felt that the three connected. A way that Ash only ever felt with Delphia until now. Until Alessia swayed. Ash pulled Delphia close, worried about what would happen. The giant woman merely fell to the side with a loud thump. Loud enough they were worried she might be hurt.

“Maybe I can find you a castle too…” Alessia mumbled. 

Ash walked towards the edge of the table relieved to see the steady rise and fall of her giant chest. Those last few words left them curious. The one from back then had brought them a toy castle. Snuck out one she was proud of. It didn’t seem possible, but maybe they weren’t sold out like they thought. Maybe… maybe Alex wasn’t dead.

“Ash…” Delphia whispered. They stepped back to her, just as the door of the room opened. Felix again, he must have been listening for it. “Tomorrow… tomorrow let’s tell her what we know.”

They nodded. Felix didn’t look at them as he picked Alessia up and brought her back to bed. It made sense the other wouldn’t. The two started walking towards the entrance to their house again. Heavy steps came towards them. Ash froze as the shadow settled over them.

“Don’t worry about whatever she said to you. She probably won’t remember,” Felix said. The giant turned and left right after. Ash watched the man pause at the door. “She won’t hurt you like this or we wouldn’t leave you in the same room.”

Felix was gone. Delpha dragged them inside. Together the two curled up again. A life they started to enjoy over the last few weeks was coming to an end. Tomorrow one of them would tell Alessia what they knew. Something that might change things, maybe even kill them.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A pounding headache greeted Alessia as she returned to the world of the living. Last thing she could remember was Felix finding her in the wine cellar. If it was up to her she’d stay curled up in bed for the whole day. That wasn’t allowed. Not when two humans were under her protection. Something she completely failed to manage drunk off her ass.

One groan turned into two before she pushed herself to sit up. Rubbing her head she almost missed the two humans staring right at her. This time she fought back her groan. It was easy to assume she had another night of tears. This is why the humans of the family hated when she drank around them.

Bed for the day became much more tempting.

Instead she forced herself to stand and smile at them. At best she didn’t say everything, at worst she told them all her dirty secrets. How she nearly killed someone as a kid. Failed to protect humans that were running in fear from other giants. Her heart pounded in her ears when she considered the other parts she could have mentioned. The other reason the humans in the family hated when she was drunk. They didn’t like hearing they smelled good.

“I’ll get dressed then we can go get breakfast,” she mumbled as she stepped near the two humans. Ash and Delphia stared at her. Something was different. “Is… everything ok?”

“Uh, Alessia we uh,” Delphia started. It was the first time the tiny woman sounded nervous. That wasn’t usual, even in fear she was strong.

Ash stepped forward, “We need to talk to you. About… about why those other giants were after us.”

Eyes wide Alessia stepped closer. Slowly she sat down in front of them. She almost wanted to lie on the floor to stare up at them. It was obvious they weren’t comfortable with the topic. Tense tiny bodies were easy to pick out after all this time. She leaned forward, her hair followed to surround them. She could see the tangles from a restless sleep last night.

“I…,” she sighed. Delphia’s hair was blown back, Ash’s clothes billowed. “Whatever I said last night. If I…” Sharp breath. It never happened before, but maybe this time. “If I threatened you. It didn’t mean anything. I would never hurt you.”

“No, no you didn’t do that!” Delphia stepped closer. That was new. Over the last few weeks it happened only in the garden.

“We decided to tell you. There’s a gun. It…” Ash looked to Delphia. Delphia nodded then they both met her eyes. “It makes giants human. We know where it’s hidden. The other was broken years ago. When the other one, Dominic I think, got angry because someone got away.”

Alessia sucked in a sharp breath. That was exactly what they wanted. More than that, there was only one. It was a race to who’d get it first. It had to be her. She brought her hands up to surround them. No shaking, maybe trust. Maybe pouring her heart out while drunk helped.

“Can you tell me where?” she breathed. Two headshakes.

“Only from the room. You’d need to take at least one of us with you.” Delphia stepped forward, as if she was offering.

“You’d feel better if I took you both right?” Tiny wide eyes followed by nods. “Ok. I’ll get ready. We’ll leave as soon as we can.”

Alessia had to push away all her nerves. There wasn’t time to waste. Anton was no fool, he wouldn’t have stopped looking. She had to find it now. As she grabbed her clothes she paused in front of a closet she rarely opened. Today would put her life at risk. There was one thing she could do to lessen that.

She pulled open the closet and grabbed the vest from inside. A gift years ago from Rhys and Felix that they swore was a joke. Except Rhys told her later it was Ryder’s idea. Something to keep her safe since she decided to take a bouncer role at a number of bars. To make herself a target.

Getting ready to go took too long from her perspective. She’d been back to her own shirts for a week; Felix added the same scent protection to her pockets that her dad had. They were a little tight over the vest, but not something a giant would notice. Alessia pulled her jacket over the shirt and pushed open the door.

“Ok, let’s go,” she said as walked up to them. A quick crouch to set her hand on the table. Both humans climbed on easily. She brought them to her pocket and let them jump in on their own. “Don’t worry. You’ll stay safe with me.”

Alessia walked out of the house quickly. It was early. She was always the first one up after a night drinking. No one would be awake to hear her leave. It would help. 

Outside she skipped the car. The walk would be less noticeable, easier for the escape later. The streets were empty as she walked. Just what she wanted. The Sulvan family probably slept late too. It would work for this. Sneak in and out. She could be silent, just like her mother.

It felt too soon that the Sulvan estate was in view. She slipped behind a tree nearby and watched. The building seemed empty. Enough that she should be able to get in and out. Their official search was over; the family was back. 

“Ok, we’re here,” she whispered. A quick reach into her pocket to grab the two humans. There wasn’t time to be as careful as usual right now. She held them in her palm, just where they could see the estate. “So, where do I go?”

“Del,” Ash whispered. She nodded as she stood up on Alessia’s palm. She almost panicked as the tiny woman neared the edge.

“Back there,” Delphia pointed towards a run down shed. They’d skipped over it in the initial search. The surrounding area was overgrown. It was clearly ignored. Alessia narrowed her eyes. Not ignored, designed to look ignored. “That’s where we were kept too.”

“Got it.”

Alessia curled her fingers over them. Delphia scrambled back well before her hand moved. Carefully she pressed them to her chest as she moved forward. The Kamias were known for their fence. It was odd among the families. The Sulvan family had been extremely vocal about it. Of course it was known they had a habit of grabbing humans from other families for snacks. The openness made this easier.

It was easy to walk over the hedge of the property. Alessia crouched as she walked. Her fingers pressed the two humans flat against her palm. She could feel the tiny chests moving up and down. Every few steps she stared towards the house. At one point she swore someone saw her, but no alarm sounded. No bullets sent her way. She had to assume it was safe.

In front of the shed she stood up mostly to her full height. The trees hung over just enough she couldn’t manage to straighten her back. That didn’t matter. She tried to push the door open, but it was stuck. With a groan she pulled the two humans up to her face.

“I’ll need to break down the door. I’m gonna put you back in my pocket while I do that, it’s safer,” she explained. Two nods. They weren’t shaking. She chose to believe that was good. 

She dumped them both in her pocket before taking a few steps back. Alessia hugged her left arm to herself. She placed her right hand on her left elbow then angled so her shoulder would hit the door. She ran straight into it, the door creaking and cracking from the impact. 

It wasn’t enough. Again. More creaks and cracks.

Again.

Again.

Again.

And again.

“What the fuck?” she breathed. 

When she stumbled into the shed it revealed a dim room that was far too pristine for the exterior. A full blown lab was in here. At least as far as she was concerned. She wandered around. Counters full of machinery that looked strange until she stepped closer. It was all designed to poke and prod at humans.

Cabinets that were left flung open, jars lined them. Chemicals she’d never seen were listed. It might not only be chemicals, but she couldn’t tell. A tall fridge sat in the back of the room. She couldn’t keep herself from marching over to open it. The inside was filled with tiny bags of blood. Tiny to her, but not to the humans that it must have come from. 

Alessia turned and retched. She was glad in her haste she forgot to get any of them something to eat. This place was awful. The exact place that would make something that would change a person down to their DNA.

It took a few minutes to compose herself again. Guilt ate at her for the two little humans that had to listen to her try and fail to be sick. She pressed a hand to them, taking one last sweep around the room. 

She purposely avoided the bed in the center of the room. Bed was a kind term, it was an operating table with clear restraints. Big enough to hold her father down with extra room. The thought made her shiver.

“Can you tell me from in there or do you need to see?” she asked. It felt disgusting to bring them out in this place again. 

“Just me,” Ash called. She nodded, it didn’t matter if they saw. They would know she heard as soon as her fingers reached into the pocket. She did try to just take them out, but Delphia’s fingers dug into her skin.

“No… take me out too,” the tiny woman’s voice was hard to hear. “Please.”

There was a weakness in the word that she hadn’t heard before. Delphia and Ash only had each other in this misery. A miracle they even survived. She would personally make sure they had a safe place to go after all of this. A place no one could hurt them again.

“Whatever will make this easier. You two point it out. I grab it. Then neither of you will ever be here again.”

It just took shifting her hand slightly to grab them both. She curled her fingers up and against her palm. This was awful. It would have been better to tell someone she was coming. Find a way to keep these two from returning to this place. 

Those thoughts didn’t matter now. She pulled her hand up until it was flat. Uncurled her fingers and waited. Ash stood, Delphia was curled up in her hand. Maybe it wasn’t the smartest thing, but Alessia pulled the hand closer. Gently she ran a finger down Delphia’s back. The tiny woman inching closer to it pushed away her doubt.

“Over there,” Ash drew her attention back to the current task. They pointed towards the wall near the machine that had probably been a source of torment. “You’ll need to put us down. You need both hands to move the counter.”

Alessia nodded. Reluctantly she set them down next to the machine. She’d break it on her way out. Then she kneeled and pushed both her hands behind the counter. Ash was right, it moved. Just a little. That little was enough to cause something to click and a piece of the wall in front of her to open. She shuffled back, almost scared to see it.

“It’s in there,” Ash said. “The scientist hid a version once he realized Dominic was probably going to kill him. It didn’t change anything.”

“I’m guessing Dominic already had one for himself?” Alessia asked.

“No, the scientist had two… Dominic found him hiding the first,” Delphia answered. “He… he grabbed the only other one who’d survived and loaded the gun. Made the giant a human then… stepped on him.”

“Sick bastard.” The growl couldn’t be kept down. She’d make Dominic pay. “Wait… what do you mean he loaded the gun with someone else who survived?”

“Read the notes.” Both said it together. That was starting to make her worry. In her mind unison from them was bad.

Alessia listened though. She pulled open the panel until she could peer inside. A clearly modified pistol sat inside. The front had something that looked like a megaphone opening. The spot for the clip was replaced with an open spot made of glass. She could see bits of red left on the bottom of it. Alessia grabbed it and aimed it towards the table.

A deep breath then she pulled the trigger. In response a metal plate slammed down in the glass opening. She could only imagine what that meant. The gun let out a sound like an empty airsoft pistol. She set it down to grab the notes.

A lot of it was stuff she couldn’t understand. The first two pages technical terms Rhys would know. Then she found the simplified part:

With this device. As long as the blood of one whole human is used we can turn any giant in the gun’s range into a human. The Sulvan family will reclaim the power those filthy Kamia’s have been taking. It’s obvious they have a soft spot, this will be a just punishment. We’re lucky to have so many specimens of a rare human blood type. If the human and giant match they won’t change. The rare blood will ensure we can change almost anyone without knowing that information.

“For every shot it kills a human…” Alessia sat back on her feet. Eyes wide. This… this was disgusting. At first she almost hoped she could use it on herself. Finally stop being a monster. That wasn’t an option anymore. Now she had to get it home before any Sulvan could find it. She shoved the notes in her pocket. “We have to go!”

There wasn’t time to wait for them to agree. For the first time since this started she scooped them up. Then ran. Unfortunately she was out of luck. Just outside of the shed was Anton, his two lackeys, and about 4 other Sulvan family members behind them. She growled, they had spotted her.

“Well, well Alessia,” Anton clapped his hands, even stepped closer. “I didn’t think you’d get that one to talk after you ate its lover. Hand over the gun and the human and we’ll let you go home.” He snapped his fingers, guns were aimed at her. There was a little hope. The Sulvan family were notoriously awful shots. “Otherwise you might not make it home.”

“Oh and what were you planning to do when you found this? Use it on me or just more of my family?” she growled. The monster laughed. She took the chance to move a little. None of them noticed. Too focused on Anton having his ‘moment’. He turned back to glare at her.

“Now, now. It would be easy. We help your father back to his long lost love. Pin the disappearance on your mongrel elder brother. You and I run the family… Of course if you step out of line mommy and daddy might be the ones who take the consequences.”

“You’re sick.” He laughed again. She moved again. Just a little more.

“You think we’re sick?!” The volume even made her flinch. She tightened her hold on Ash and Delphia. This wouldn’t be like last time. “You Kamias are the ones who play house with humans. Those things are nothing better than snacks. Pets on a good day. Yet you keep them all the time. No one else believes us, but we know. There’s something wrong with you Kamias. Something you’re doing with the humans you don’t eat.”

“We just aren’t gluttons like a Sulvan. We only eat ones that are worth it.”

Another laugh. He fully turned away from her. A few more steps. She could see the line to the hedges. She could run now. Duck behind the tree. Stick the two in her pocket. No pocket wasn’t safe enough. Under the vest. That was the only way she could guarantee they’d survive.

Anton took a few more steps from her. She moved. As fast as her legs would carry her she ran. Behind her were shouts, no one expected her to run. 

Gun shots fired around her. Her grip tightened again, but she knew they were safe. She’d learned to control her strength since then. Just before she ducked behind the tree a shot grazed her arm. She shouted in pain.

“No time, you’ll be safe,” she panted. 

That was the best explanation she could offer. She pulled the hand holding the two up past her pocket. With her free hand she ripped open her button up shirt. Then shoved the two down underneath the bulletproof vest. She let them go once they had settled just between her breasts. It was the best place to know they wouldn’t fall.

“Get back here Alessia!” Anton shouted. 

Alessia pushed herself off the tree and ran. More shots rang out. A few hit her back as she ran. Her jacket and shirt were going to be ruined after this.

Main roads weren’t an option. Alessia pivoted towards some of the slivers of woods near her. The trees would help.

“That way!” 

Run. That was all she had to do. Another shot whizzed past her head. The trees weren’t helping as much. She might die.

The humans against her chest moved, she couldn’t die.

Alessia bobbed between trees. Shots blew past. More in her back. One grazed her leg. She’d hit the ground soon.

She couldn’t hit the ground. They’d have the gun. Have Ash and Delphia. That couldn’t happen. She wouldn’t let that happen.

Her mind blanked as she ran. Numbly she felt pain in her arms and legs. Nothing more than a graze. Her back ached. Her lungs spiked like icicles dotted them. She had to get home.

The shots died off just as she neared the fence she loved. It protected humans and herself. She pivoted again, towards the gates. Just had to get inside.

“So predictable,” Anton’s voice ahead of her made her freeze. “Really a car or something might have made you succeed. I’ll just have to make you human before the others. Keep all the Kamia’s just for me. I wonder what you’ll taste like.”

Alessia reached to her side. No gun. She left without it. The gate was so close. Almost close enough to get away. She wouldn’t threaten him with the gun. Not playing with lives to save her own. Instead she walked forward. 

The idiot did as she wanted. Fired a shot right at her stomach. It hurt, almost enough to make her stop. Not enough though. She kept walking. Another shot. This one grazed by her shoulder.

“Next one won’t miss,” Anton threatened. She watched him take aim at her head. The edges of her vision were black he was all she could see anymore. This would be how she died. Failing to protect so many from a monster worse than herself.

The gun shot rang out. Alessia waited for a burning pain to spread through her. To break the numb feeling in her body. Only it didn’t. She stared at Anton as the white over his stomach turned red. The gun fell from his hand as he collapsed. Behind him stood Rhys, a cold look she’d never seen on him before.

“You’re right, the next one didn’t,” he said. Alessia walked forward now. Rhys didn’t even look at her, pulling his phone out. She heard it ringing, as soon as it connected two shots rang out. “I found her.”

“I’ve taken care of the ones tailing her,” Felix’s voice came from the phone. “I’ll kill her once I’m home.”

“After me.”

Alessia walked forward again. Rhys finally looked at her. He’d been crying. His eyes were bloodshot. He stormed right up to her. She wasn’t sure what his plan was, but crouching with his back to her wasn’t it.

“Climb on, now,” he ordered. Alessia obeyed. The squirming against her chest left her relieved. They were still alive. She was right. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Running off on your own! Running while they shoot at you! You know better than this. At least Ryder will finally see his gift was useful.”

Alessia nodded. Rhys didn’t stop scolding her the entire time he carried her into the house. His voice cracked a few times, he’d cried. In a weird way it calmed her. The knowledge her family was worried she’d be gone. The adrenaline in her body started to ebb and she realized how much pain she was in. All she wanted was to take a shower to try and make it go away. 

Rhys kicked open the door, it made the two humans squirm again. Alessia pressed her face into his shoulder. She could imagine how angry her dad was, especially if they knew she took Ash and Delphia. That part had to stay a secret. More for the two humans than herself.

Rhys grunted as he shoved her off his back. He left her sitting on the coffee table. Against her better judgment she took stock of herself. Arms and legs coated with blood. Felix was going to kill her later. He’d just made the shirt she was wearing. Rhys walked off. At the very least she could pull off her jacket. The button down shirt below could be left alone.

“Alessia,” her father’s voice made her shudder. The squirms of the humans against her stopped. She couldn’t blame them. “What were you thinking?”

She didn’t face him. That didn’t matter. Heavy steps stormed toward her. Ash and Delphia would hate being around when her dad walked around like that. He sat in front of her, she didn’t want to face him. He pulled her arm towards him. She grimaced as the sleeve of her shirt was torn.

“You’re lucky they didn’t kill you,” he said. She finally tried to see his eyes. Worry. Fear. Things that the head of the Kamia’s couldn’t feel. “What were you even doing? I told you Anton wanted you.”

“I was told to check the shed. I found it,” she whispered. Nothing to show Ash and Delphia knew how it worked. Rhys or her dad might ask the two to stay with what they knew. They’d think it was a demand not a request. “Dad, it's sick…”

Alessia hissed as her dad pressed a cloth to one of her wounds. Disinfectant. He didn’t say anything while wrapping each spot with bandages. Rhys came back with more bandages and disinfectant. She winced as soon as he pressed something to her leg. She was lucky.

She wanted to zone out. Her mind didn’t let that happen. She became focused on the two humans, still as statues, stuck against her chest. They were safe and alive. She’d get upstairs and pretend they had never left. It was just her. She ran off on her own with a little bit of info. After a few more hisses and winces, Rhys and her dad sat back. Both staring at her with clear disappointment.

“Where’s Felix?” she asked. It was a better question.

“Cleaning up. You were lucky he’d gone out to make some doubles late last night. He heard the shots, saw you running. I wouldn’t have been there if he didn’t call me,” Rhys said.

“Ryder?”

“With Felix.”

Alessia nodded. Her dad hadn’t spoken again yet. She hung her head. It was stupid, but if the Sulvan family found it first… That wasn’t something she would think about. Her father’s large hands forced her to release the death grip on the gun. The thing that turned her mother and siblings human. That murdered who knows how many innocent humans for one man’s sick games.

“Rhys, take the gun,” her father said. “Take it apart, take your notes, destroy what isn’t hard to recreate. Alessia, was there anything besides the gun?”

“Notes… they’re in my jacket,” she whispered. A hand settled on her head and ruffled her hair. Her dad always did that.

“Don’t do something stupid like this again. You’re worth more than any information we’re looking for.” She turned her head away. Her dad grabbed her cheeks to make her face him. “Promise me you won’t do something like this again.”

“...I can’t…”

“You’re too stubborn.” Her father sighed as he pulled her into a hug. “Too much like your mother… Go let those two know we’ll find a place for them in whatever city they want. Felix is grabbing a doctor on his way home. Go get some rest.” 

“Ok…” She took a deep breath. Something she had to tell him. “Dad, the notes. It takes a whole human to use it. Their blood… That place… it was sick. I can’t…”

“We won’t let anyone know about this. We’ll find anyone else who has this too. This becomes a Kamia secret.”

Her father let her go. Rhys grabbed the gun off her lap and walked off. None of them actually knew where he worked on stuff. Well, Ryder probably knew. Her dad helped her to stand, but she didn’t need it. She could walk without help. As soon as he let her go, Alessia rushed up the stairs. The two humans had been trapped against her long enough.

It was a painful walk to her room. Without the adrenaline every spot she was grazed stung. Her muscles ached. The spots the vest had been hit were pulsing. She had to remember to thank Ryder later. 

In her room she shut the door and locked it. The click was more reassuring than she wanted to admit. It was hard to believe she was alive. Anton nearly killed her. The squirms against her chest brought her out of her thoughts. She walked over to her bed and leaned forward. She almost wanted to keep them close. Where she could keep making sure they were safe.

Instead she let out a sigh. Incredibly aware of the humans against her she pulled the vest over her head. When Ash and Delphia squirmed she would pause then continue. It only took a few precious seconds to take the tight vest off herself. She became horribly embarrassed as soon as she realized she was left in just her bra. Even more so with both humans sitting in said bra.

A swallow to steel her nerves, then she reached into her bra. She pulled them out easily. Her breasts kept them pressed together more than in her pocket. She left them on her bed, below her as she hovered. Both tiny faces were red, she knew it was probably warm against her, but she wanted it to be a different reason.

Alessia slid to her knees. She watched the two of them. They wouldn’t look at her. At best she made them hate her. She sat back on her heels. Something. She had to say something. Explain anything. Nothing popped in her head. Instead her eyes stung because now the two little humans who made her feel like a person were going to leave.

“A little warning would have been nice,” Delphia shouted.

“I’m sorry,” Alessia whispered. She hung her head, it was hard to look at them.

“I-I didn’t say you should be.”

Alessia snapped her head up. Delphia wasn’t looking at her. The red looked more like a blush against the tiny woman’s pale skin. Ash started to chuckle, she didn’t miss the blush on their dark cheeks. It looked more embarrassed than annoyed or bothered. That was just wishful thinking. She knew it was. 

“She’s embarrassed,” Ash said. Alessia’s own cheeks warmed at the idea. 

“Right that… I just wanted you safe. I should have picked somewhere better. I should have at least explained. I’m sorry I…” A total loss for words. She wasn’t as sorry as she should be. It was kind of nice knowing they were safe. Feeling them against her skin. She fell for these two and now they’d leave.

“I already said you didn’t have to be sorry.” Alessia bit her lip. She was a bit more willing to accept that it was embarrassment that made the two red. Which just made her find them both cute. “A-anyway what did that other giant mean? A-about telling us you’ll find us a place in a city.”

“Why did you hide that we were with you?” Ash asked.

A sigh. Reality mattered. Her crush on them didn’t. Soon they’d be taken to a city where mafia families can’t reach them. At least where it’s a lot harder to reach them. Where she would never see them again. The distraction from the pain in her body ended. She leaned her arms against the bed. She was tired, it was still so early.

“That’s what we do. Get humans like you into safe places. Wherever you want. We’ll get you there,” she whispered. She brought her chin to rest on her arms, let out a sigh that ruffled the clothes of the two humans. “I… I didn’t tell them you were with me because if my dad and brother knew how much you knew they might ask if you were willing to stay. I know how they seem, it wouldn’t be easy to believe you have a choice. You do though, none of us would make you stay here.”

Whispers between the two. A conversation she couldn’t be part of. She wanted to bring back those moments where it felt like they weren’t in a mafia town. It was over. She’d never break into the world the two had. Never have blinding smiles towards her. Laughter and secrets. Promises or trust. The last few weeks would fade into a painful, heartbreaking memory.

“We might be willing to stay,” Ash said. Alessia couldn’t hide her excitement at the idea. The chance to maybe grow closer to them. “We need an answer first…”

“If I know it I will,” she breathed.

“Last night… before you fell asleep again. You mentioned someone named Alex and said you might bring us a castle, what did that mean?”

“Oh…” Alessia pulled her head back, hid her mouth behind her arms. “When I was little, a group of humans had wound up near the house. I tried to help them. Brought medicine, food, even snuck out a toy castle for them to live in. I tried to get them to meet my parents. Looking back it was stupid, probably scared them more. I just knew my mom and dad would keep them safe, get all of them out of this city. Alex was the only one who spoke to me.”

“What happened to them?” Delphia asked. Alessia hated this. The humans of the Kamia’s knew. She didn’t like telling the story. Explaining how in panic she nearly crushed someone.

“I’m not sure… One day I went to see them. The castle was crushed and Anton was standing there about to eat one of them. I tackled him, got the human, and tried to run. Back then I was kind of short. I was scared, I almost… almost killed Alex and he was the one human I had been there to save. My parents got him to a hospital where he survived, but we never found the others.”

Alessia knew tears were streaming down her face. She hated her past. That she failed to protect so many. That she nearly killed someone. Even if they stayed.

“You found them… the only ones left,” Delphia whispered.

“We thought… the giant helping us gave us back,” Ash said. Alessia lifted her face a little. That would mean… all the others were. “A few escaped. Some let go. Anyone with blood types like ours were kept.”

“Hey… if we stay, would we just keep living in your room?”

Alessia shook her head.

“Where then?”

“You could stay on the property. We have a house for human members of the family,” Alessia sat up a bit more. “There’s room to build a house for you two on the property hidden away. You’d be safe here. I usually take care of getting the supplies for the houses so I’d be the only one around.”

“Could… the house here stay? Maybe on the dresser instead?”

Alessia flushed. A small nod. She liked the idea of them having a place here. 

“...Ash, do you want to stay?” Delphia asked. Alessia looked at them. Their gaze had her melting.

“Yes. I think it would be a good idea,” they answered.

Alessia started to purr immediately. That caused the two to start laughing. She never thought something good could come of her connection to the mafia. Especially where the Sulvan family was concerned. These two were a light in the darkness that she didn’t know she needed. Hopefully they could keep getting closer, maybe she’d be part of those whispered conversations after all.

“I should get dressed before Felix shows up with a doctor,” she whispered. A little less embarrassed knowing they might enjoy the view.

#gt #g/t #giant/tiny #giant tiny #g/t writing #gt writing #gianttiny #gt community #g/t community #oc: alessia #oc: ash #oc: seer/delphia #oc: felix #oc: vitus #oc: ryder #oc: rhys #kamiafamilymafia

[dyns33]

A chaste meeting

I had no idea for a title but I wanted a Murderdock x ex chaste reader

(I really hate the new posting version, I'm not sure how to edit and I don't know if the post is too long)

Y/N knew as soon as she saw Matthew Murdock.

Well, no, not right away.

She knew there was something about him, something familiar, in his posture, in his tense shoulders, his calm demeanor, his hands gripping his cane tightly like a weapon.

But it wasn't until their first date that she noticed the ninjas watching them.

At first, she didn't make the connection.

Being a former disciple of Stone, following the precepts of the Chastes and having promised to fight against the Hand, she thought they were there for her. But that seemed unlikely, since Y/N was fifteen when Stone died, and hadn't continued the fight, accepting defeat and seeking a normal life.

Her meeting with Matthew Murdock was neither planned nor necessary.

She didn't need a lawyer, she didn't know anyone who needed a lawyer, she stayed away from trouble, and so there was no reason for their paths to cross, or for him to care about her.

Very quickly Y/N would learn that the Devil didn't pay attention to people who weren't useful to him. So their meeting, then their relationship, was strange.

It happened at Murdock's favorite cafe. Another strange thing, that Matt Murdock had a favorite cafe, when he had been raised more or less like a heartless killing machine.

"They make the best coffee in town, darling. Organic, with brown sugar, and great quality coffee. No chemical tastes. Perfection."

Well, he may not have had a soul or a heart anymore, but Matt still had his personal tastes, in addition to having an extreme sensitivity, whether it was his easily changing mood, but also his still functional four senses.

Y/N was ashamed to admit it, but it was because he was blind that she wasn't really suspicious right away. She had noticed the little things, but considering that he might have been a fighter before he lost his sight, and that he was now the mob's lawyer, using his knowledge as weapons, but nothing more.

Then she remembered Stick.

She had never met Stick. Stone had told her about him, saying he was a stupid asshole, far too soft on his apprentices. The old owl was blind, but that didn't stop him from being fearsome. There were another ways to see.

Stick had died years before Stone, killed by the Hand. Rumors said his best apprentice was with him when it happened, but his body was never found.

Her former master did not give her a name. He did not tell her that the disciple was blind too. No, he resumed training, nearly breaking her legs and an arm.

She didn't miss that time. And she absolutely didn't want to go through that again with the Hand.

But it seemed impossible to escape Matt Murdock when he decided you were his.

Foggy Nelson whispered it to her when the Devil introduced them.

"I'm not really his best friend. We're not really friends. We're doing each other favors. It's complicated."

"Why are you telling me this ?"

"Because you seem nice. I don't want him to hurt you. Don't try to run away and don't trust him."

In a corner, Matt was watching them, waiting for Y/N's response. She said nothing, finishing her drink, not indicating whether she was taking the advice seriously and remaining perfectly calm.

It wasn't the first time she had heard such things. From the first day, there had been more or less hidden threats in Murdock's sentences, when their hands had touched in the coffee trying to take the sugar.

"After you." he purred with a big smile. "Unless you finish the sugar, I'll be terribly upset."

"There's enough sugar for both of us."

"I take a lot of sugar."

"Not me, I like my coffee almost as black as my boss's heart."

It made him laugh, though Y/N couldn't tell if it was a straight laugh. It was always impossible to know when Matt was playing a role and when he was serious. Maybe he was never totally serious and his personality was partly a role he had played for too long to remember what was inside.

She guessed it by seeing the ninjas. She was sure of it when she met Otomo-san.

He reminded her a little of Stone. Impassive and dangerous, watching them discreetly. He called Matt 'Master Murdock', but she wasn't stupid. Neither was Matt. Even though the Hand had given him a title and responsibilities, he remained their property, he had no freedom, and he was in control of nothing, especially not his life.

His relationship with Y/N was not really acceptable, nor accepted.

Maybe that was one of the reasons he stayed with her. Because it annoyed his superiors, and Matt loved annoying people.

He was also maybe a bit lonely. Sometimes, when they were alone in his room and he took off his glasses, Y/N seemed to see something in his big empty eyes. Not sadness, but a form of weariness.

Without saying anything, she caressed his cheek, which made him groan. Matt hated pity. But he let her, not moving as she took him in her arms, kissing his forehead and caressing his skin.

He had a lot of scars. Y/N knew their meaning. She knew the purpose of each one, and which ones shouldn't be touched. She had some too, which she tried to hide from him, without much success.

Maybe that was what intrigued Matt. After several months of relationship, his behavior changed. He stayed silently beside her, his head bowed, listening. Studying her movements. Watching her reactions.

Y/N knew how to look normal. Stone had taught her. But there was always a difference between being normal and looking normal. That was how she had known there was something with Murdock.

It was probably how he also ended up knowing that there was something with her, even if he had always had doubts.

"I'll ask the question once." he said quietly as they dined at his house. "And of course I expect an honest answer. Who sent you? "

"No one." Y/N replied just as calmly, continuing to eat.

"You're not with them. They don't like you, and they're not good enough actors to pretend they don't like you. You know how to fight, you're ready to defend yourself if attacked, but you don't strike the first blow. Is it a ruse ? An attempt to enter the hive ? I immediately felt that there was something, you were too calm. You are always very calm."

"No. Can you pass me the salt please ?"

As a test, Matt stood still, his hands crossed in front of him. Y/N finished her bite, considering her options. Do not take salt. Take the salt. Asked him again. Jump out the window. Kill him with his knife.

She reached out for the salt.

He moved quickly, trying to catch her. Just as quickly, she jumped up from her chair, pushing the table towards him to get him as far away as possible. It didn't have much effect, as he easily avoided her, lunging at her.

It wasn't really a fight. More like a dance or a game. If one of them really wanted to, the other would be dead in the first second. But no, they punched and chased after each other for several minutes, before Matt managed to pin her between him and the ground.

"Darling. The dish is quite salty."

"To each their own taste, sweet tooth."

"Who do you work for ?"

"No one." she repeated calmly, and the hand that was on her neck moved down to her chest, settling on her heart. "It's just me."

"Who were you working for ?" he asked then.

"… Stone always said that Stick was too nice. I guess they're not all from him. I'm glad he's gone. Otomo-san looks like him."

Matt's vacant eyes were fixed on her, peering into her soul. She didn't add anything, it wasn't necessary, as there was no need for him to tell her about his past. She already knew everything, and above all, she understood.

"I knew you were different." he whispered, keeping his hand on her heart, kissing her.

It was almost sweet. Matt wasn't really sweet, rather rough and bestial, but she didn't blame him. He had learned nothing else. If Stone hadn't been killed, she would have become the same. Y/N had been lucky.

As he took her on the cold floor, she might have thought it was a shame she couldn't be free for longer.

But in fact, she had never been free before this moment. Having to hide, having to lie, having to accept that no one could understand.

She understood Matt, and in turn he understood her. He totally accepted her. And despite his enforced loyalty to the Hand, he wasn't going to tell anyone about what he had just discovered.

It would be their secret.

"Hmm. You taste so sweet."

"And you are as bitter as my coffee."

"Perfection." he purred, licking his lips. before devouring her again.

#daredevil #matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock imagine #matt murderdock

[theminecraftbee]

Hi, here with a vault hunters question — what's the best way to start with the big tech mods if i never played with any of them before (or, haven't played with three of them and lowkey hated Botania)? I'm not *quite* at that point yet, but i want to try them and don't want to get too overwhelmed to play.

it depends on what you’re looking for! first, let me say that none of the big tech mods will become required at any point; production mods probably define your farm-building capabilities way more than your big mods in most cases, and unless you’re playing in skyblock or with grindy crystals you can normally last well into the late levels without needing absurd farms for much (although most people identify a specific pain point they want modded farm for eventually, and this can be a good reason to go into a specific mod). choose a specific thing you want to be the First Task you do with a big tech mod, and focus on getting the steps done to do That Specific Task; that often gives you the path to learn everything you need!

from there, if you’re a beginner with no preferences, my advice is that you will probably want to watch or read tutorials! all four big mods have wikis/guides of varying qualities; botania also has the botania lexicon in-game, and create has the “ponder” feature. these will help you figure out how to play one of the big tech mods, once you’ve decided which interest you!

as for how each mod plays: thermal expansion is less powerful than its cousins, but is far, far simpler. almost everything thermal expansion does is a one-block solution, and I’ve never had to chain more than maybe two machines together to do any given task. you will craft a machine using all components you can craft at a crafting table, provide that machine power, and you’re off to the races! so if you like simple solutions, this is probably the mod, especially since it doesn’t require any mod-specific crafting.

mekanism is all about chaining machines together. it can do a lot of things thermal expansion can do much more powerfully thanks to the ability to upgrade many of those basic blocks into factories, but boy do some processes in mekanism require a LOT of pipe spaghetti, machinery, and steps to get things done. luckily, determining what these steps ARE tends to be fairly simple, as you can just follow backwards in JEI from your intended endpoint to the eventual one or many starting points you need, and there are a lot of video guides, plus a wiki. if you LIKE some of the most powerful ore processing and tech and eventually power production in the game this is for you, but it can be complicated or intimidating at first glance.

botania also, from what I’ve seen, requires chaining multiple machines together, this time in order to send mana from place to place. the hard part of botania, at least for me, is wrapping my head around how to move mana around; once you understand that, I suspect it’s a bit simpler than late-game mekanism, but its logic can feel VERY different from the other three mods due to that mana abstraction. it and create also make the coolest decorative blocks in my opinion, with botania having a lot of cool “natural” blocks.

create is the mod that requires the most “thinking” in my experience to get things to work, but is often the most capable of being cheaply powerful. you will need to use spatial reasoning to figure out how to connect gears together in order to make anything work, and you’ll likely need to use create’s conveyor belts to move items around. this can make doing anything in create feel very complicated if you don’t like it, but extremely satisfying if you do like it, since in create you will often feel like you can use your own, special solution for things, instead of a set chain of machines set up the way anyone else would. a lot of players who otherwise dislike tech mods also tend to really like create, despite it being that deep down! it also has by far the best in-game documentation, with the ponder system on every single mechanical part letting you see what they do in-game, with animations to demonstrate, and it’s probably the most useful all-in-one package of the big mods for the most things, even if not necessarily the best at each of those jack of all trades things it does.

so yes! hopefully this helps you out! all of the big mods have sort of their own playstyle, and maybe this helps you figure out where to start!

#answered #vh talk #quotesandmiracles

[siriannatan]

“I hear them whispering when I walk by…” - fWhimmy

As with the whole series, the prompt was found @deity-prompts

I wanted to write fWhip with a cane for the longest time And I think Grimlands crown definitely needs to be based on Wither Roses :}

AO3

Jimmy had a small problem with a certain king of a nation neighbouring his small empire. Mythland seemed incapable of remembering where the agreed borders were. Talking to Gem who seemed to be his closest and most agreeable ally didn't help matters much. Lady Pearl just shrugged it as Sausage being Sausage. It would seem no one in the whole Wither Rose Alliance could control the knight-king of Mythland. Unless...

He heard from Scott, his good friend and ally, that there was one more empire in the Idiot Alliance - Grimlands. Unfortunately the young - according to Scott so who knew how young he actually was - count rarely left his manor within Eastvale. And while usually, Jimmy would deal with his 'enemies' - Sausage was honestly more of an annoyance than anything - himself with brutality and force, he'd rather not annoy Lizzie by starting a war... Again. So against what he'd rather do he set off to meet with Grimlands' 'young' count.

Grimlands... Scott's talking did no justice to the settlement nestled in the surrounded by mountains plains. The slight corruption of some sort breaking from the ground was a bit worrisome but Jimmy dared to assume locals knew how to deal with it. The raised rail leading to the distant mines was impressive but not as much as the count's manor towering over everything within the valley. Even the gunpowder 'factory'. Jimmy knew enough about surface technology to know it was just pens of creepers and some sort of machines refining the raw gunpowder into the slightly more stable product Grimlands sold as all sorts of explosives.

Just as he landed he realised that in his neighbour-related annoyance, he forgot to schedule a meeting. Or maybe he just got used to Joel always being up for a meeting with other rulers? Whatever the reason he could not just turn back now. It'd look weird. The least he could do was find someone who could get him a meeting scheduled. So to the town hall, he went and to his surprise was told where he could find the count to just talk to him today.

So with no complaining, Jimmy thanked them and went where they directed him to. A vast field of black roses - Grimlands special  Wither Roses - that thrived on the corrupted ground and were the symbol of the empire. Not explosives, not the red gems that caused the corrosion. The roses. And quite honestly, as dangerous as they were, Wither Roses were quite beautiful.

But the roses weren't the only pretty thing. Other than Jimmy there was only one other person in the whole huge field of darkened soil and black flowers. Average - from what Jimmy understood about humans - height human man with soft-looking, ginger hair, not too different from Gem's, with a black crown resting among the slight curls. He wore a heavy-looking coat despite the warm sun. His heavy boots left easy-to-follow tracks on the safe paths between the flowers. His right hand - he wore dark thick looking gloves as well - was clutching a sturdy but masterfully decorated cane.

"Count fWhip I presume?" Jimmy asked after closing the distance, he did stay out of the cane's reach.

The count slowly turned to face him. He was really leaning heavily on that cane. Not that Jimmy paid it much mind. He instantly understood what Scott meant when he said the count was pretty. Dark blue eyes, flawless but slightly worryingly pale skin. A pair of goggles fighting for space around his neck with a thick knit scarf. And the crown was apparently based on the Wither Roses. A dark metal flower crown. Cute...

"Yes, and you are?" the count asked, straightening his back to look a bit taller.

"Jimmy, the Cod Father of the Cod Empire, one of your allies is my neighbour and has been disrespecting our borders for months at this point," Jimmy explained, offering the count a bow Joel taught him.

fWhip thought on it for a second and... "They never tell me anything," he sighed and winced as he shifted.

"Should we move this indoors?" Jimmy offered. "Open field doesn't strike me as a place to discuss politics," he added so fWhip would not think he was talking about the cane. 

fWhip nodded and led Jimmy back to the town. Jimmy carefully matched his speed to the count's slightly limping walk. It gave him more time to appreciate how beautiful the valley was in late spring. And he even saw the train moving between Eastvale and the mines right next to the flower fields. It was really impressive.

"You're not going to say anything?" fWhip asked when the train's noise died down.

"The train's really impressive, I have no..." Jimmy started but a bitter chuckle stopped him. Did he say something wrong?

"About my dumb leg, I meant. Everyone has something to say about it and I'd rather you say it to my face than talk behind my back," fWhip sighed, shaking his head as he stopped to look at Jimmy. “I hear them whispering when I walk by... I think they think my hearing's worse than it is,” he chuckled, dry and bitter.

"It is what it is, what's more, to say here? Does it make you any less capable of ruling?" Jimmy shrugged. He didn't see any problem there. He knew rulers - now long dead but that's life - who had many imperfections but were still very effective leaders and rulers.

"Maybe if I was meant to rule here before... stuff maybe people would look over it but as things are everyone's overly worried about me," he shrugged and resumed their slow walk. "I haven't heard a word about your border thing with my lovely older brother before today, I rarely hear about things happening outside Grimlands. My siblings and Pearl keep things to themselves and don't involve me. Other rulers just go to them unless they really have to... It's annoying. I think Scott's the only one who just goes right to me."

"Well, I thought you just didn't really care," Jimmy shrugged. Damn, Grimlands was pretty save for the spikes of red rocks and crystals spreading from the mines.

"No, I definitely do care, just no one bothered to say anything... And the trains run on coal. It heats up water and makes steam that..." 

Jimmy honestly got instantly lost as fWhip explained how the trains worked but still listened to it intently. fWhip had a very pleasant to listen-to voice. Like Scott and his endless rants about elven history and architecture. Pretty to look at and pleasant to listen to. Unfortunately, they eventually walked through the city - most citizens looked at Jimmy due to his height of nearly eight feet and that he was not salmon-merfolk. To Jimmy's shock, there was a whole small village of Salmon-merfolk by a river.

"Refugees of their old royalty's stupid wars," fWhip explained and Jimmy tried to keep his hostility to cod's biggest enemies. They were civilians, they came here to escape their ruler's stupidity.

The talk about the border problem was a different matter and enough of a distraction.

"Well, the main problem is that Sausage does not like being told what to do. And unfortunately, he won't listen even to my words. He needs to see things... So how would you feel about having a big hole be your border with Mythland?" fWhip only needed one look at the map once he was sat by his meeting table.

"Big hole?" Jimmy asked. He was a bit confused as to what fWhip meant.

"Basically, we'd blow up a big hole along the border so no one can miss or misinterpret or question it," fWhip clarified with a wide smile. "Don't worry, we'll do it in the safest way possible. And agreeing on a bridge should be easier than a border," he added, maybe to calm Jimmy.

And so, a week later, Jimmy, Sausage, Gem and shocking everyone but Jimmy, fWhip gathered by the border and watched it blow up. Jimmy was glad he didn't tell Lizzie about it. Just seeing the resulting hole had her almost fainting. 

Less border conflict gave Jimmy more time to talk to Scott - and now fWhip. But mostly with Scott, about fWhip and how cute he was when talking about explosions.

#my stories #my stuff #fanfiction #empires smp #empiresshipping #empires fwhip #empires jimmy #fwhimmy #fish husbands

[howlingday]

Pyrrha: It's fine. I'm completely over Jaune.

Nora: Pyrrha, you can lie to yourself...

Ruby: Obviously. I mean, look at your weapons.

Nora: But you can't lie to Team Breakup.

PRWB: (Murmurs of uncertainty)

Nora: Guys, it's obvious what we gotta do.

Weiss: Throw acid in their stupid, kissy faces!

Nora: No!

Pyrrha: Wait, wait. You want to break them up?

Nora: Well, it's either that or-

Weiss: (Hissing)

Nora: NO! Not every problem is solved by throwing acid on it!

Blake: Unless the problem has an overly alkaline ph balance.

Pyrrha: Blake, please. Nora?

Nora: I don't know. Maybe throw Cinder a bait and switch? But the bait is something Cinder wants more than Jaune.

Pyrrha: So we seduce Cinder with something she can't resist.

Ruby: So anything that gives her even the slightest advantage.

Pyrrha: Put it in Cinder's path, and her pathological desire to take it and run away should kick in and do the rest.

Weiss: Or, you know, a lot of couples break up if their kid dies.

PRNB: (Chattering of displeasure)

Weiss: I even made a diagram. See, what we do is hire somebody to kidnap their fat, gross baby. There's this huge manhunt and it's in all the newspapers! On the wireless! Remnant is going absolutely apeshit! And that's when we double-cross him with easily traceable gold certificates. We plant a shitload of evidence in his garage, tip off the cops, he's convicted of being a White Fang supporter and ZAP! Dirt-nap for the beastman! Compliments of old sparky.

Ruby: God damn...

Pyrrha: Wireless?

Blake: What was that about-

Nora: Wait, but if it's a kidnapping...?

Weiss: UGH! The baby is taken to the mountains and is raised by Ra's al Ghul. Training under his League of Assassins, she becomes the perfect killing machine before returning to destroy those who had betrayed her.

Ruby: ...

Pyrrha: Us...

Weiss: YES! But it buys us time.

#rwby #pyrrha nikos #nora valkyrie #ruby rose #weiss schnee #blake belladonna #arcfall #knightfall #archer

[linalina-universe]

I've been praying on this daily. Transgender Christian converts.

I've been asking some of the saints, Holy Theotokos, and Jesus our Lord. As well as talking to my Guardian angel as I can. To help Bring my transgender eunuch siblings around the world to Faith in Jesus. Seeing all of the LGBT Christian Blogs recently on Tumblr is making me so Glad. God is Good. God Cares about us. Even if there are teachers in the church who condemn us for being different. Seek Reconciliation, Repentance. Learn to Forgive one another. Learn to Love one another. The path towards Jesus isn't easy. Much learning and Discernment it's a LONG ROAD. But keep learning about Jesus. Don't settle for less, but find a place to plant your roots. If you want to really get into the thick of it learn about Orthodoxy. But it takes time for us to get where we need to be. I do believe God listens to all of His Children though. The Holy spirit is everywhere. I would never judge whether or not a person is damned or saved due to what church they go to. That's up to Jesus, he is the judge. But come as you are. Never let a Church teacher hold Jesus over you do not conform to the whims of man as we are not of this world. Only Conform to the Whims of Jesus. Learn to be humble in life, Obedient to Jesus. Learn about humility. Realize no one person on this earth is any better than another. True humility is a virtue. It takes time to cultivate. We are imperfect. Learn LGBT History, ancient history, learn about eunuchs and Queer Saints. qspirit.net, But realize that many of these things are unkown without a time machine. Be sound in wisdom of our ancestors. Do not be defensive all the time though. Learn when to talk, listen to the silence. Do not let hate, and the machinations of this world such as political ideologies, capitalism control your life. We need money to work in this world. But money and possessions are temporary while Jesus and God are eternal. Pray for the Rich kings and politicians who persecute us pray that they seek Jesus. "It is better to Light a candle than to Curse the Darkness." Do not let the Darkness of media news overtake you. Pray for people around the world suffering. Count your blessings. Realize just how good you might have it. I recommend you learn about the Orthodox Saints of Alaska if you want to learn about actual anti-colonialist Christians. The Saints are wonderful examples of ideal Christian lives. I recommend Trisagion Films on youtube to learn about the saints. While I affirm LGBT relationships and see true Joy in them. I know unless Heaven and Earth are moved. The Orthodox/Romans will never Affirm them. I recommend merely Getting Married under the Law of the Land and then showing up at church. Have a celebration an an episcopal church I love the episcopal angelicans it's a safe respite for us queer Christians. I wish that LGBT marriages had been affirmed decades ago, then maybe some of the self destructive generational trauma we see in the queer community wouldn't exist. But we are a persecuted class and either way people dislike us. I hope someday the Orthodox have church mothers. We need women for the women and girls in the church to confide in. We need equal representation. I understand if not everyone agrees with me. But I love Jesus. I hope that being his servant like the court eunuchs of ancient times can be well pleasing to Him. Eunuchs were seen as angelic. His divine eros fulfills my heart in some ways as someone by tradition of ancient orthodoxy should technically be celibate. Live as yourself and know God loves you. Take your medicine and heal. He will never Give up on you. Art By Devlev on Deviantart. Please support them. They Draw Beautiful Queer art.

#christianity #orthodox christianity #catholic #queer christian #lgbt christian #transgender christian #orthodox christian #christian faith #faith in jesus #jesus #angels #faith in god

[isara0408]

Megami and Kaga had a lot of potential than just being Kaga stalking Megami and pretty much being her stalker/creep that Yandere Dev made himself.

Instead of that, why didn't Yandere Dev make them childhood friends? Kaga's parents work in Saikou Corp. I'm sure Kaga would have met Megami during his youth whenever Megami had to leave the Corporation for her training, so why didn't he chose that path for them and have Kaga be the first male that Megami trusted? Kaga fits the criteria that the Saikou family is looking for (sure, he's at the bottom of the list, but he's there)

Kaga is quite intelligent and very talented at a very young age. Maybe if Saisho was able to see that, maybe he would have wanted Kaga close to Megami.

"If this boy is close to Megami and Megami trusts this boy, he can be a useful tool for Saikou Corp in the future."

Ichirou doesn't go against his father's decision. He never really argues with him either, so Ichirou has to follow his father's orders on keeping Kaga close to Megami. They will have to keep a close eye on him. If he ever did find out the dark secrets of Saikou Corp, Kaga would be killed by the orders of Saisho. (Just like Saisho did with Fungirl, but actually killed him rather than using a machine)

Saisho would keep a close eye on the two children whenever they were close to each other or hanging out.

Megami and Kaga begin to talk almost every day, which Saisho allowed. As time went on, the two became very close friends. Kaga was there for Megami whenever she needed him, and Megami was there for Kaga whenever he needed her.

The two continued to stick by each other's side throughout their years. Even after Saisho died, Megami made sure that Kaga stayed by her side if Ichirou had ever tried to separate and break their friendship, or if Kencho ever tried to set a trap to break their friendship.

Kaga would be a threat to Ayano if she killed him before and during Megami's week. Even if Kaga is her suitor, Kaga is someone important to Megami. If Megami loses him, who knows what she will do to put Ayano behind bars for his death.

So, let me give you guys some headcanons for this universe :>

They first met when they were 5.

Megami was quite distant at first because of how strict her family was until Saisho, himself, allowed her to see him and hang out with him.

Kaga was there for her during the tragic event of her murdering her hamster. (Megami's mother sneaked him inside) That day, Kaga promised her that they'll buy a hamster and take care of it together when they got older.

On her 13th birthday, Kaga made her a bracelet with his own hands to represent their friendship. He made one for himself, too. (And Aoi once she came into the picture) Megami hides her bracelet under her sleeves of her student council uniform.

Aoi and Kaga didn't get along well at first, but they slowly got close to each other and became friends. (Kaga is still scared of her)

Megami was slightly shorter than Kaga when they were children, but during the years and puberty, Megami grew taller.

Kaga would show Megami his new gadgets, invention ideas, etc. Megami would sometimes help him with building those inventions/gadgets (with a lot of protection, of course). That's how her love for science became.

Megami has a small robot that Kaga made himself and gave it to her to keep her company when they first met. She still has it in her room.

Megami forced Kaga to take self-defense classes. (It didn't end very well)

Kaga is basically Megami's cheerleader. He will cheer for her as much as possible to show that he is by her side and she can count on him.

Whenever Kaga gets hurt by an experiment, Megami will immediately take him to the best hospital in Japan and would be there for him unless she had training to do.

Kaga's parents feel uneasy having Megami close to their son. They know how strict the Saikou family is. They don't want their son harmed in any way. With time, they began to trust Megami. (Only her)

Once they enter Akademi, they are known as powerful friendship. The daughter of the richest and most powerful man in Japan and a mad scientist who is very talented and made the impossible possible. together? Power duo!

Megami has witnessed many competitions that Kaga has been in and won first place for. She tries to be there with her bodyguards and would take Kaga out to celebrate for his accomplishments with the permission of his parents, of course.

Whenever Kaga did his crazy smile or laugh when he got a new idea in his mind, Megami would smack him (gently) to make him quit, or shaking her head and say, "No."

Megami only lets Kaga show her affection (holding her hand, pecking her cheek, hugging her, etc). It makes him happy, and the way he shows love.

Kaga's parents sometimes tease Kaga about, one day, ending up liking Megami as more than a childhood friend. Kaga rejects this every time (but they were right in the end)

Kaga ended up catching feelings for Megami when they entered Akademi. At first, Kaga was confused at first on how his body was reacting to having Megami close to him or showing her affection, which is something he always did. Kaga never fell in love with anyone or saw anyone in a romantic way, so it was all new to him. With time, Kaga finally admitted that he caught feelings for his childhood friend. (His parents had a nice " I told you so." victory 😌)

Megami caught on to this. She's not blind. It's quite obvious from Kaga's body language.

Kaga never had the courage to confess because of many guys trying to win Megami's hand in marriage until the last year of Akademi, that's when he confessed his feelings to her under the cherry tree.

Megami did develop feelings for Kaga, but it took her more time to realize those buried feelings.

Kaga admires Megami a lot for her achievements, bravery, determination, and her hard work.

Megami would carry Kaga if he was ever too fatigued to move (after not resting for a certain number of days). Kaga found it annoying at first but got used to it.

Whenever Megami has free time (it's rare), Kaga would use this opportunity to go to the town with Megami to spend time together as much as they can.

Kaga would protect Megami from any guy who would flirt with her or look at her inappropriately. Megami would tell him to let her handle it and to calm down.

Megami is brutally honest with Kaga even if it hurts his feelings. She will say what she thinks and feels. (This is a headcanon I have as them as a couple )

If Kaga is killed, Megami will make sure to put Ayano behind bars. She knows she did it. After that, she will mourn for Kaga's death.

If Megami is killed, Kaga will find the person who caused her death and mourn for Megami's death.

This is probably something that would happen in another timeline not in the canon one, but it's a nice idea and interesting friendship :D

#kaga kusha #yandere #yandere simulator #yanderesim #megami saikou #saikou #kaga x megami #megami x kaga #timeline #universe #best friends #besties✨️ #childhoodfriends #yanderesimidea #saisho saikou #kencho saikou #ichirou saikou #tsuma saikou #fungirl

[horizon-forbidden-sheesh]

HFW: Realistic Gameplay

I'm not sure how many people do this, but I like to approach my HFW gameplay to make the experience as realistic as possible. Here are a few of the considerations I keep in mind while playing to ensure my timeline is accurate to the game's storyline. :)

[⚠️ Warning! Some light spoilers are referenced ahead.]

ON SLEEP:

How long can Aloy reasonably go without sleep? Maybe 48 hours, but the high-intensity work she does requires dexterity & focus, so her accuracy & analytical abilities diminish the longer she's awake.

When she's desperate, or thiiiiis close to her goals, she likely gets tunnel vision, and gameplay gets a bit sloppier. (ie. Latopolis 😬)

Plus, the world is way more DANGEROUS for people at night! Humans are not a naturally nocturnal species, even if Aloy's stealth approach excels in the cover of darkness. She's also probably a little ~off~ in her circadian rhythm because she's one of a very few future humans exposed to blue light, lol.

ON FOOD:

Let's assume she's fed when she stays at any given settlement, but out in the wilds, she should be eating every day.

This means with a small food pouch, she can really only be out in the wilds for ~3 days without having to hunt her own meals. (Which no doubt, she can do, but do your really think Aloy has the time or patience to be cooking while she's saving the literal world? Nah.)

ON TRAVEL:

Along the way, I have to ask myself: how much does the side quest matter? How time-sensitive is it? Is it already on her existing route?

I try to WALK through settlements to A) not appear insane, B) accurately simulate the time she would actually spend there.

Can she really sprint all day long?? In this house, we jog. ("most humans can store about 20 miles’ worth of glycogen in their muscles." - NYT)

I don't love riding machines unless it's a long distance or an urgent situation. (ie. Sprinting back to the Base from Tilda's house) The reason for this is because:

A) you alert literally every machine around you, and I prefer to play a stealth approach

B) Riding is associated with Rebel activity, so you'd likely meet resistance from Tenakth locals.

C) not every path is cut out for riding (ie. On Lowland paths, her steed is likely too heavy & might get mired in the swamp / Riding in the Desert during the day, the metal would burn the everliving sh*t out of her.)

ON WEATHER:

In the Desert, I try to sleep during the day & travel at night. It's way too hot to be out during the height of day—even if it's around late October when she's there.

A little rain never hurt anybody, but major storms require cover & a wait-out period. I once got stuck in Sky's Sentry for half a day while I waited for an AETHER-driven storm to die down.

In my gameplay, it's November when Aloy turns up in Sky Clan territory (Yosemite Valley) which means it's freezing at night!

ON TIME:

I track calendar days while I'm playing to make sure I'm within GAIA's estimated ~3 month climate collapse timeline estimate. (Note that she doesn't give this estimate until Aloy discovers the Base, a little over 1 month into gameplay.)

Aloy is probably stuck in Stone's Echo for ~2 weeks healing her ribs. "Most broken ribs heal on their own within six weeks" (Mayo Clinic) But there's no way Aloy has that kind of patience. PLUS I'd bet big money when GAIA made her, she was given some cool genetic boosts that make her heartier than most naturally-born humans. In my game, I took her on some pretty chill missions back to Chainscrape afterward to give her more time to heal.

The game is literally set up to have us experience the seasons as we navigate the world over ~4-6 months!! (ie. The trees are changing color in Chainscrape when we begin in early Autumn / The Riverhymn side quest tells us it's the first of the winter bloom / There is snow in Yosemite Valley.)

From Embassy to Singularity, my gameplay took 132 Days (~4 months). I still have some side quests & errands to finish up, so if you try and complete all tasks before the Singularity, you're probably looking at 5-6 months total.

Okay, that's all I can think of off the top of my noggin, but I'd really love to hear if anyone else has some rad realistic constraints they like to add to the game! :)

#hfw #horizon forbidden west #aloy #gamer quirks #let's play!

[alephskoteinos]

On Hermeticism and the Right Hand Path

There are times when I often try to find out about what is taken to be Hermeticism and specifically its essential philosophy. This is very often after looking into pre-Christian polytheism in antiquity, including survivals in "post-pagan" societies (under the aegis of the various monotheistic religions). Sometimes I wind up thinking that Hermeticism really is part of the formation of the Right Hand Path as we understand it. And then there are moments where it feels...different.

I read Sam Block's recent article about Hermeticism and from the title I was immediately struck with the whole idea of reterritorialising the Christian notion of sin ("the Sin of Imposing Body-Based Identities on Soulful Selves"), as if the problem of "sin" was only ever the Christian definition of it. There's also the core of the argument, where the central reason why gender essentialism is wrong is because it supposedly identifies human beings with their bodies, which is wrong because Hermetic teaching states that human beings are basically spiritual selves whose being is identical with God or the Hermetic Godhead, and basically everything else, the whole world of becoming, is an illusion that covers over the universal identiy of God/Godhead. What baffled me when I read it is that I know Sam Block likes my writings about the fundamental basis of fascism in regression towards , but I'm looking at a presentation that lines up with exactly what I criticised: the idea that corporeal becoming is just an illusion layered over the metaphysical order of pure being or God, which the esoteric fascists have almost always taken up and adapted as a rationale for their political actions.

The notion of the identity of Man with God, realised through attaining certain degrees of spiritual purity and ascending up to the Godhead or to Nous, so as to realise the mutual identity of Man with Nous or Godhead, does seem to line up with a rather basic theme of the Right Hand Path: the identity of Man and God.

On the other hand, there are threads within Hermeticism that seem...somewhat different. Most notably the concept of "god creation" proposed by Lodovico Lazzarelli, one of the first Hermeticists known in Europe. Justin Sledge talked about Lazarelli's idea, derived apparently from both Hermetic literature and the Sefer Yetzirah (not to mention his own creative interpretation of the Book of Genesis), that the fully realised human being would be capable of actually emulating the divine, by creating spiritual beings and drawing being out of nothingness, just as God or a god does. On the one hand it's easy to take this as simply the final proof of the human being's identity with God. But if it's a process of emulation and imitation (hang on, I hear the Gnostic Sophia from here!), then why would the human being need to emulate God if human being is already identical with God - unless perhaps really they're not, and must become like God in order to create more gods, and thus set be part of Henri Burgson's machine. I can see how this might just as easily be taken up in terms of the modern Left Hand Path. Unfortunately we don't really know how Lazarelli's god-creation works.

I would also hope that what I'm being told about the idea of "as above, so below" as meaning a descent into ultimate interiority thus leading to ultimate exteriority (descent leading to ascent), as connecting to the traditions of going into the underworld, would allow me to see something in the Hermetic tradition not quite in line with what I expect, maybe even relevant to broader ideas of "Pagan" esoteric tradition, or at least that of pre-Christian Greek and Egyptian magic and religion. In general I'm just wanting to see Hermetic literature that might establish just such a connection. It might even be possible to warp something like that back to other, perhaps more archaic, forms of pre-Christian magic and religion, and to some of the much later and more modern that I play with.

#hermeticism #right hand path #left hand path #occultism #esotericism #paganism

[20dollarlolita]

Hey Pink,

so I went to a flea market today and scored a old singer machine for 10€! Now I'd like to know when it was made and probably where but I'm completely lost, maybe you could shed a little light on it?

I cleaned the serial number plate as best I could. I suppose it reads: G67875 (2 or Z, I cannot tell)

Thank you so much!

It's a Model 15!

Here's some more information on the Model 15. Note that they're calling theirs the "15K", but the K just indicates that it was made in Scotland. Yours is likely a 15 and not a 15k, unless it says it was made in Great Brittan in the text along the top.

If you're ever unsure about the date on a Singer machine, I recommend this taxonomic key, and the Ismacs serial number database.

We can tell from the bobbin threading path on the front that this is a very early Model 15. According to the serial number, it's likely one of a lot of 50,000 made in January of 1910.

I believe the decal style on that is called Tiffany or Gingerbread. The first thing that I noticed about that is the absolutely exceptional state of those decals. Usually, machines of this age have a lot of the decal work worn off. If you want to clean them, be careful about damaging them.

The best advice I've found for cleaning and restoring old machines is from Doug at treadleon.net. Here's an excerpt from one of his articles:

Now let's talk about appearance. Some folks like to see an old machine shine like new. If the basic decoration, paint and decals, is good enough, that can be done. Most machines we find in sales aren't quite that good, or may actually be very bad. I like to let old machines show their age and usefulness. To clean a machine's surface, I use first a gentle mix of diluted dish soap and water, rubbing small areas at a time with a soft cloth. Often there is old dried oil or shellac on the surface. The earlier cleaning with kerosene may have loosened a lot of that up and it will rub off, too. Often it can be scraped off with a fingernail. Don't use hard scrapers, you'll scratch the enamel. Once I have the plain dirt off, I wipe with sewing machine oil several times over a period of days, then wipe off all the oil and wax. I use Turtle Wax. Other folks have had good luck with ArmorAll.

There are folks who favor various cleaning compounds, such as Simple Green, 409, Windex, etc. Great care must be exercised here. Many of the chemicals in these compounds, especially ammonia, will destroy the gold in the decals, leaving you with silver decals, or no decals. Since the decal content and manufacturing varied over the years and between manufacturers, the fact that a product did a great job on one machine does not mean it will not damage another. Always start by cleaning a small area in back of the pillar to see what is going to happen.

I've also found that liquid wrench spray penetrating oil can get through some really nasty dirt on the machines and it pretty decal-safe. It's become my main "clean now or else" tool for when dish soap is not doing the job fast enough.

One really cool fact about the Model 15 is that any time you're looking at sewing machine parts and you see the number 15, it's likely because it was a part first used in this machine. They use our standard needle, which is the needle family 15x1. If you go out and buy a standard sewing machine needle today, it will be a 15x1. When you go buy the standard bobbin for most Singer/Janome/Baby Lock/Brother/Bernette machines (plus some Pfaffs and Vikings), it's called the Class 15 bobbin. That's because the first machine to use these needles and these bobbins was the Singer Model 15. It's that influential.

The Model 15 sits flat on a table even without a bottom case, though you can buy some really nice bottom case reproductions on etsy or get a generic flatbed machine case from SewingPartsOnline if you do want a base for it. Note that if you use a generic case, you'll have to take the hand crank off when you store it with the lid on it. That said, I have my hand crank machine in a cheap generic flat bed case and it's always quite an enjoyment when someone opens it up and expects a mid-1990's machine and SURPRISE! It's an antique!!

Anyway, excellent find! The Model 15 was hugely influential. Pretty much any time that you find a modern sewing machine thing with the number 15 on it, it's because the item was first used on the Model 15. The needle family that all non-industrial sewing machines use today is the 15x1 needle family. That needle was first used on the Model 15. If you buy bobbins for almost any Janome/Brother/Baby Lock/Bernette and many Pfaffs and Vikings, it's called the Class 15 bobbin. That bobbin style was made for the Model 15 machine. I just think it's so cool that this machine became the standard so effectively that you can just go down to your local big box craft store and buy needles and bobbins for it!

PS if anyone wants a sewing-related rabbit hole to go down, Japanese Model 15 clones that are actually improvements on the Model 15 is a good one to check out. It was cloned long after Singer discontinued the Model 15.

#sewing machines #antique sewing machines #singer 15 #singer model 15 #sewing machine history.