So...while I was cleaning out my Tumblr account, I accidentally deleted this artwork I posted shortly after Unus Annus ended, and I'm pretty bummed out about it. Anyways, here it is again 🙃
today's videos really got me thinking that at some point later in the future UA will become just a distant memory. And it's kinda bittersweet but also a little bit relieving to think about. In my opinion it's kind of a reflection of real life. When you lose someone close and special at the beginning it's hard to accept that they're really gone. But as the years go by the pain may still be there but it won't hit as hard as it did before. And eventually it will just be a day to remember. That's just my interpretation of it at least.
Ethan's video specifically gave me so much bittersweet happiness, because so much of what he said is exactly how I feel too.
When he said that because of Unus Annus, 2020 became a year of togetherness and community, despite everything? When he said that that year, he'd never felt less alone? Oh god. I felt that to my core. I've said it before, but it's so so rare that I ever get to be part of something from the very beginning, even more rare that I get to be involved with the community and experience that thing together, in real time. I'm always the one to pick up a fandom a while after it's over, show up to a dwindling online presence, full of inside jokes that I wasn't around to understand. But Unus Annus? I was there. I was on the subreddit. I participated in the challenges. I was involved in trying to dissect the lore as it was happening. It was a feeling that I don't know if I'll ever be able to experience again, just knowing with so much confidence and joy that I belong. That was so special to me. I look back on 2020, now, and it's not defined by covid or lockdowns for me. It's defined by all those happy memories.
And then he mentioned being able to remember how you felt, something triggering a memory and suddenly it all comes back- that passion, that excitement, the pride and the togetherness, the grief and the simultaneous celebration, it really hit home. It's not like recalling a specific memory; it's more than that, it's being able to feel exactly the way you felt in the final moments of the livestream. Something you can't describe, but it's unmistakably distinct, and it's such a big feeling. That's something I do with How To Train Your Dragon too, actually; arguably one of the most important pieces of media in my life. Every once in a while, I'll be able to remember just how incredible it felt to be seven years old, watching that movie in the theater for the very first time, completely in awe. I really cherish those moments. It's a reminder that even though those things aren't as big of a part of my life as they used to be, the memory is still preserved inside of me, still just as important, still a part of myself. I'll never forget that #WeWereHere. It made me really excited to hear that Ethan gets that way too.
Memento Mori, Unus Annus. Here's to two years 🥂🖤🤍😌