#ushijima wakatoshi angst

[mavrintarou]

Lord Ushijima Wakatoshi [1]

I tried to do one part... but this got too long. I feel like this is the smuttiest of all Lord series (tell me otherwise - let me know which one you think is the smuttiest lol). If you’re new, welcome to my Lord Haikyuu fandom, I have completed Lord series for Sakusa, Suna, Kita, and the Miya twins, check them out too!

Warning: explicit smut; angst; TW: miscarriage; reader is inexperience

Part two - end

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Wakatoshi thrust hard one final time before he withdrew and fisted his cock, he groaned as his cum shot thick white spurts all over Y/n’s belly and breasts.

Her eyes shut as her pussy spasm even after his withdrawal, the overstimulating effect he often left her in. Her chest rose with heavy breath as her legs that were pinned to her chest were finally freed from his grip. Y/n didn’t need to open her eyes to hear he was grabbing a towel, as always, he cleaned her up afterward.

Y/n opened her eyes and reached her hand out, indicating for him to give her the towel so she could clean herself up. He ignored her reach and began wiping his essence away.

She didn’t quite understand why he preferred to ejaculate on her, only to wipe it away. Not that she wanted him to cum while he was inside of her.

She lay there with an arm over her eyes while he wiped her down, even between her legs. The first time he did this, she panicked and nearly fought him until he ordered her to remain still with his stern Captain tone.

“We have a mission coming in two days, I need you to prepare – “

“I know, I know…” Y/n cut him off, even though he repeated the same thing every time they had a mission together. Somedays she wondered if she was more his assistant than his second in command.

She rolled over as soon as he set the towel back in the basin, that was her usual cue to leave. She grabbed her yukata and was about to slip it on when she was suddenly on her back once again.

“Who said I was done?”

Y/n’s eyes widened briefly before she quickly blinked them away. Lately, Wakatoshi has been keeping her in his chamber longer than before, not satisfied until he’s had his way with her.

“I’m – I’m sore,” Y/n murmured, cheeks flushing.

Y/n didn’t know the true meaning of soreness until her first night with her Captain. She has gone through the exact training and exercise the rest of her team has endured to earn their current position regardless of her gender and never once has she uttered a complaint, even in the face of soreness.

She knew she was inexperienced and lacked education about sharing a man’s bed since she was essentially raised a boy by her grandfather and spent most of her time in the company of men.

Since the day she rose to second in command, there was never a mission she was not by her captain’s side but the one time that she was assigned to a different mission that he only trusted her to handle… he returned in a state of discomfort.

“What happened to him?” Y/n demanded, being blocked at Captain’s doorway by Shirabu and Ohira.  

Reon avoided Y/n’s eyes, “he… uh – there… he’ll be fine in a couple of… hours. Or days.”

She narrowed her eyes at him before looking at Kenjiro, she knew he would tell her, he was the closest to her on the team. “Tell me Jiro – what’s wrong with Cap?”

Kenjiro looked uncomfortable under her strict gaze before sighing, “he was exposed to some unknown powder during this mission…”

Y/n’s eyes widened, and she made a move to brush past them and see for herself how the captain’s well-being was but they blocked her once more. “Move,” she demanded sternly, never once speaking to them with that tone.

Reon raised his hands in a defense mechanism, “listen, Y/n… you can’t see him right now… for his dignity… and maybe your safety.”

They were speaking in a circle and it was making Y/n frustrated.

“Yes, it is best if you don’t see him within the next… maybe a few days…” Kenjiro added, trying to avoid eye contact.

“If you guys do not get to the point and tell me exactly what is wrong with Cap, I will put you both down.”

Both men’s breath hitched as they straightened their shoulders in reflex. Kenjiro looked at Reon before he nodded. Kenjiro, the team’s medic expert exhaled before speaking, “we believe the unknown drug is a form of an aphrodisiac.” He paused, “since discovering this, Cap… Cap is in pain.”

“Are there no medicine or herbs to help?”

Kenjiro shook his head, “no, it will flush out of his system in time or… with assistance.”

“What kind of assistance?”

“Sexual… he is in a state of sexual desire… that is the only other way to help him is to meet his sexual desires.”

At that exact moment, all three of them jumped when they heard a crash coming within the Captain’s chamber. Both Kenjiro and Reon entered his room finding their captain on the floor naked.

Y/n has seen Wakatoshi topless many times due to tending his wounds but never has she seen him completely naked.

Wakatoshi turned his head, looking at Y/n with hooded dark eyes. “Y/n…” he groaned, a hand reaching out to her. “I need you…”

Kenjiro and Reon struggled to get him back on his feet, dragging him back to his futon.

“Y/n, you should leave – your presence might make it more difficult for –“  Kenjiro is knocked on his feet when Wakatoshi pushes him aside, trying to stand and make his way towards Y/n. “Y/n, leave!”

Reon interfered and wrapped his strong arms around Wakatoshi, “Wakatoshi, you are not in your right mind right now – please go back to the futon!” He was close to pulling the man with the same body size as his back to the futon until Wakatoshi maneuvered, shoving him off– making him fall right on top of Kenjiro, and knocking the wind out of him.

“Jiro!” Y/n ran towards the two but was caught by Wakatoshi in a bear hug. “Cap – get a hold of yourself!” She tried to pull herself free but it was futile when he held on to her tightly. His nose pressed against her exposed collarbone before she felt his hot tongue lick along her neck.

Looking at an unconscious Kenjiro and Reon who is trying to wake him up, a hand grips her jaw forcing her to look into the dark eyes of her captain.

“Only look at me, Y/n.” He growled, before pressing his lips against hers.

Y/n moaned into his mouth before breaking the kiss. “Reon, take Jiro and leave! I’ll handle Wakatoshi from here.” Reon refused, shaking his head but before he could protest, Y/n commanded him. “Go, now!”

Reon lifted the lanky Kenjiro into his arms and tossed him over his shoulder before hurrying out, closing the door behind him.

Immediately, she pushed against him with her might until he let her go. “Wakatoshi… this isn’t like you.” Her captain, whom she had known for years stalked her like she was his prey.

Jiro’s words earlier echo in her ears, meet his sexual desires…

Letting out a frustrated breath, she began to untie her uniform. Each piece of clothing dropped on the ground by her feet until she stood before him naked. She had some knowledge about intimacy between a man and a woman and heard plenty of tips from the men on her team.

She just needed to trick him, get him on the bed so she could knock him out.

Wakatoshi approached her, he looked taller and bigger without his clothing.

Was his shoulders always this broad? She found herself lost in admiration.

“Y/n,” he murmured, reaching to lift her chin so their gaze could meet. “You’re so…” his eyes drop to appreciate her naked form, “beautiful.” His arm snaked around her waist, pressing her against him.

Y/n gasped, feeling the hard ripples of his body pressed against her but what caught her off guard was his cock she has been avoiding was pressing against her abdominal. She pressed her palms against his chest to put space but Wakatoshi was faster, his hands picked her up easily off the ground. Her arms wrapped around his shoulder and legs around his torso. She can feel his rough callus hands supporting her naked bottom.

“Kiss me, Y/n… please…”

He held her higher, making her look down at him. Her cheeks flushed as he gazed at her desperately, pleadingly for her to put him out of his misery. Leaning down, she pressed her mouth against him, meeting his kiss hungrily.

She has kissed one other man but has never kissed them as intensely as now. She couldn’t recognize the lewd moans that were coming from her mouth continuing to meet Wakatoshi’s movement.

“Wai – wait Captain – “ she broke off the kiss, and flinched when she heard him growl in disappointment. His lips move to her jaw, nipping down to her throat. She looked over at the futon to see if she could get him to lie down, then maybe she could take the opportunity and knock him unconscious.

“I need you,” Wakatoshi murmured against her throat. “Need you now, Y/n… please…”

She gently lifted his face, meeting his dilated pupils with her gaze. Her heart raced faster than ever before. Throughout her entire life, she has never been swayed by anything yet at this moment, her heart and mind wanted to give in. She felt an undeniable yearning to yield, to grant him what he sought. “O – okay,” she heard herself say, “just once…” Her heart skipped a beat when his pouty lips curved into a smile, “don’t – don’t make me regret it…”

Wakatoshi muttered something under his breath before moving. Y/n turned her head to see where he was carrying her and frowned when he walked straight to the dresser and set her slightly on the edge. He pulled away and her eyes locked with his thick hard cock that was leaking from the tip. Her belly was smeared of the white milky essence.

Any words she had was lost as she watched him stroke his cock, her jaw dropped unknowingly as she has never seen something so exotic before.

He stepped forward, pressing the tip to her pussy, bit by bit he pushed forward and groaned, “relax for me.”

The tip impaled her entrance, making her tense at the foreign intrusion. “I can’t…” Y/n shook her head, whimpering, “I’ve never done this before… this is weird…”

“Look at me,” she looked up, the tone demanding her as her Captain.

Wakatoshi pressed his lips to hers, his tongue immediately searching to tangle with hers. As soon as she was distracted, he thrust in one go, fully embedded inside of her pussy.

He wrapped an arm around her back to keep her from pushing away from him. He cooed soothing words kissing her mouth as she swore at him about hurting her.

“You’re okay,” he repeated, kissing her tears away. “You can do this, you can take me, Y/n… I know you can otherwise I wouldn’t need you…”

Her fist gently beat against his shoulders, “you’re too… you’re too big…”

Wakatoshi half chuckled and choked a groan as her hot walls throb around his cock. He slowly began moving his hip in shallow thrusts until her wetness has lubricated his cock. As soon as it became easier for his entire length to penetrate her fully, his thrusts fastened. He groaned, pressing his forehead against hers, “you’re too tight… fuck I love it though… you feel so good…” Her soft whimpers gradually turned into moans as he continued to coo assuring affirmation. “You’re doing good… so good… you’re so good for me.” He hooked one of her legs over his arm, widening her legs to accommodate when he thrust inside her again. “You’re taking me so well…”

Y/n followed his gaze and looked down and was mesmerized at his cock pump into her pussy. How is it that seconds ago it was pain she felt, but now it is pleasure? “Cap – “

“My name.”

She peered up at him, biting down on her lip to hold in her lewd moans she never knew she could make.

“My name, Y/n.” He commanded again with a soft tone, “say my name.”

She shook her head, it felt too intimate saying his name while his cock was buried deep inside of her.

He shook his head with a grin, “stubborn woman.” He hooked his other arm underneath her knee, lifting her completely off the dresser. “Wrap your arms around my neck.”

She followed his command and immediately regretted it when he easily lifted her hips and began thrusting into her at the same time. Y/n’s grip tightened around his neck being at his mercy. “Cap – “

“Say my name!” Wakatoshi growled, nipping her ear. When she still refused, he sped his movement along with bouncing her harder on his cock.

“My Lord!”

Wakatoshi's movement halted as he unexpectedly heard her address him in that term. “Ahh… fuck…” he cursed as his cock pulsated. “Y/n… you little tease…” he whispered hotly into her ear. He just came but he was not close to being satisfied.

Y/n’s eyes widen as she quickly leaned back to look at him when he continue to keep rocking her on his cock. “What –“ The rest of her words turned into a moan as he started to bounce her on his cock. “Wait – you just – “

His hot breath teased her ear as he nipped the lobe, “more Y/n… I need more…”

“Wa – Waka – Toshi! Wait – you’re going too – fast!” Her ears were tuning in the lewd sound of their skin slapping together. “’Toshi! Stop – I feel – I feel weird!” Each time his cock filled her for a split second, it sends a pulse to the place she never knew existed. Her lower belly quivered like she was going to explode any second.

“Let go, Y/n – cum for me…” he whispered and commanded, “cum on my cock.”

Her back arched, her toes curled and her head thrown back as her body trembled. Her pussy throbbed and constricted around his cock. Wakatoshi's low groan mixed with hers as he finally stopped thrusting into her.

Her eyes widen feeling something warm shoot inside of her for the second time. Y/n fell limp against him, her head resting against the crook of his neck and shoulder as the last ounce of strength she had depleted.

Wakatoshi was lost in his world, still coming down from his high. His cock was still hard, the drug had not completely worn off even after such intense sex. “Y/n?” he called her name. When she did not respond he lifted her enough to slip his cock out. He heard something spill and glanced down to see a pool of milky essence.

He could feel her steady breath fanning his neck and secure his grip around her bottom, carrying her gently to the futon.

“Just stay.”

Y/n blinked, breaking out of the memories of how their rendezvous had commenced. “No, I want to sleep in my chamber.” She quickly got up but he caught her wrist, gazing at her with a soft expression that she had seen recently and making her heart race.

“Are you okay?” His tone filled with worry. “Shall I escort you back to your chamber?”

She shook her head, brushing his hand off, “I am okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” She hurried before he could convince her to stay. Each time, it was becoming a challenge to say no to him.

[5 days later]

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It has been a few hours since Y/n finally woke up from days of deep slumber.

All she could recollect from the mission was that they were ambushed. Before heading out, she had an eerie and unsettling feeling about the mission that she had never felt before. Half a day into their mission something did not feel right when her six senses noticed the quietness around them.

Whatever had happened has been blocked out of her memories.

It was evident of her substantial injuries, her right shoulder was bandaged from an arrow piercing, and a stab wound in her left thigh.

Those were expected injuries, however, the one she did not expect and was still wrapping her head around even after the doctor had left her chambers was that she had miscarried.

She was pregnant.

Since the doctor left, her hand had been resting on her abdomen, where her unborn baby is no longer living.

She was foolish to disregard the risk of pregnancy after many nights spent in her captain's bed. He had been careful to withdraw and ejaculate on her body. Y/n was oblivious to the idea that she could still conceive otherwise.  Looking back, she must have conceived from her first night with him. It would be likely that she might have been pregnant prior to them making their intimate meetups a routine. She recalled the peculiar feeling of him cumming continuously inside of her the first night and it was that moment when she was lost in her bliss and pleasure she neglected to take any precautions.

The doctor determined the miscarriage was likely caused by the excessive blood loss she suffered. Her wounds themselves had put her body in shock and if the doctor calculated correctly, Y/n was more than three months along in the pregnancy. “You were still in the risky stages of pregnancy, it is nothing to dwell on as most women face this risk altogether.”

Her hand pressed against her flat belly, recollecting a few days prior when she noticed the slight weight gain but did not put too much thought into it.

“Captain went berserk.” Shirabu quietly informed, “you may not know but after everything, we believe that the ambush was to take you out first and then everyone else. Every one of them targeted you while you were trying to keep Captain safe.”

Y/n pondered, confused as to why she would have been the target but it would make sense strategically if enemies cannot get to the main target, then take out their protector first.

“My guess is that if they took you out first, it would be easier to take out the rest of us.” Shirabu stood up, “but please rest, for the time being, you are ordered to rest. Captain has ordered a checklist for the doctor to sign off before you’re allowed to return.” He kept it to himself, but he was sure the Captain would not let her return to active duty. He knew that Ushijima Wakatoshi would never allow her to lift her sword or wear her uniform after this mission.

“Shirabu,” Y/n called his name quietly, “does he – does he know about –“

Shirabu reached for her hand and squeezed it, “yes, he knows but only a few of us, including me and Reon. Do not fret, no one else won’t know.”

After he left her to rest, Y/n stared out the window and she didn’t notice the tears that slipped from the corner of her eyes.

Wakatoshi needed a moment to absorb Y/n’s report. His breath caught in his throat when the doctor reported to him her injuries and informed him additionally, the news of her miscarriage.  

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“This is precisely why some argue against women serving in the Shiratorizawa Scout regime,” he lamented, shaking his head in disappointment. “This incident alone could potentially lead to her removal as second in command once the report makes it up to the leadership and shame the regime altogether.” Closing his briefcase, he remarked, “the loss of the child has placed a significant mental burden on her. I do not believe she was aware that she was pregnant.” He pushed his specs upward, “even if she isn’t removed from the squad, it’s uncertain whether she’ll fully recover.”

The doctor remained entirely unaware of the identity of the person he was addressing, oblivious to the fact that Ushijima Wakatoshi was, in fact, the father of the unborn child.

Wakatoshi loomed over the diminutive doctor, whose expression swiftly transformed into one of fear. “You will not breathe a word of this outside these walls, do you comprehend?” Wakatoshi cautioned.

The doctor nodded, responding barely audible as he muttered, “un – understood.”

After dismissing him, Wakatoshi sat in his chair in deep thought. Had Y/n really not known she was pregnant all this time? And when did it happen? He had been careful to pull out every time even if he wanted nothing more than to cum inside of her…

“Argh,” he groaned, burying his face into his hands. If Y/n was pregnant, it meant that it must have been from the first time. Memories came flooding back as he remembers the exhilarating feeling when he would watch his cum ooze out every time he thrust back into her. His cock was still hard as a rock even after so many rounds. Y/n would whimper, crying out that she was too full of his cum and he would fuck his cum back into her until they were both sticky with their mixed essence.

“This is all my fault,” he muttered, fingers fisting his hair tightly. She was in this predicament because of him.

Wakatoshi shook his head to shake off the memories, it was not the time to think about the past. He shot up from his seat and headed towards Y/n’s room.

Entering her room with a hushed step, he discovered her seated by the window, her expression devoid of emotion. It was a welcome sight compared to finding her asleep every time he visited.

His gaze shifted to the untouched tray of food and he let out a sigh, remarking gently, “you’ve hardly touched your meal.”

As soon as their eyes met, Wakatoshi swiftly approached her, kneeling by her side and enveloping her in his arms, cradling her delicate form. Aside from tangling their limbs in bed, outside of that, they refrained from touching one another. He whispered softly, his voice filled with concern, “please, tell me. What do you want? What can I do to bring the light back into your eyes?” His words were muffled as he buried his face into her lap, seeking to comfort her.

After a brief pause, he raised his head and gazed into her vacant eyes. Even while kneeling, he remained taller than her as she occupied the chair. Tenderly, he cradled her cheek and gently urged, “Y/n, please, speak to me.”

She leaned forward, wrapping her arms around his torso, burying her face into his chest.

His embrace grew tender as he enveloped her, holding her tightly. A hitch in his breath accompanied her trembling form and muffled sobs against his yukata.

All he could offer was a tighter grip, a comforting presence in her time of need.

[2 weeks later]

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Reon and Kenjiro did not dare breathe as Wakatoshi was a ticking bomb.  

Many often found him intimidating, though he was truly a gentle giant.

But in this particular moment, gentleness was nowhere to be found.  

Their gaze fixated on the slightly crumpled piece of paper clutched tightly in their Captain’s hand. It was almost certain that this was the official report regarding Y/n’s release from duty. The entire team had just been informed of her release and had come to inquire more information about it from their Captain, only to discover that he was the last to be informed.

Wakatoshi let out a low exhale, his focus still zoned out as he recollected his and Y/n’s last conversation.

“They will remove me.” Y/n said to Wakatoshi, “promise me you’ll pick Reon to replace me.”

Wakatoshi brought their foreheads together, “you’re not getting replaced, I’ll make sure your report only lists your injuries, nothing more.” He was willing to do anything to keep her by his side. He locked eyes with her, gazing into hers. “You are not alone.” His hand tightened behind her nape, “it was my child too, Y/n.” His statement must have caught her off guard as she flinched. “I may not know the pain you’re feeling, the suffering and the grieving but know this Y/n, I am in pain too. I’m suffering too. And I’m grieving for our child too.” His features softened, and he leaned up to kiss her forehead. “I’ll take all responsibility, I am at fault.” Wakatoshi sighed softly, he cupped her face with both hands, “Y/n, if you can give me six months, I will step down as Captain and we can settle down anywhere you would like.”

Y/n frowned and pulled away from his touch. “No, you shouldn’t do that.”

Wakatoshi frowned in return, “why not?”

“You do not need to do that for me, please don’t do that for me.” She pulls away from him completely, standing up and walking away. “It was not your fault at all, Cap. It wasn’t like you forced me, I allowed myself to get involved with you.”

“And it was my carelessness that made you pregnant, therefore, my responsibility.”

“And I am telling you that you do not need to take responsibility for it.” She shot back, “I am tired, please leave me alone.”

Wakatoshi left without uttering another word, and that marked the final exchange and encounter between them. The next day, he was promptly dispatched on a mission, keeping him away for half a week. Upon his return, exhaustion overcame him, and he slumbered for a continuous sixteen hours. When he finally awoke and sought out Y/n, her room was void of any presence. He initially assumed she might have been on break or he had approached at an inopportune moment, only to find her room empty upon his return each subsequent day.

“Captain,” Reon called out quietly, “what…”

“I don’t know, but I will find out,” Wakatoshi promised, exiting his office. He marched straight into his leader’s office without notice and slammed the letter on the desk. “What is this?” his voice is low and quiet.

The individual whom Wakatoshi regarded as a father figure let out a sigh and removed his glasses, setting the stage for a silent and intense gaze-lock between them. “It is exactly what it means, Wakatoshi.” He sighed, lighting up a cigarette, “I did the best I could to have her be discharged instead of dismissed. You know something like that could not have been swept under the rug.” He exhaled a puff of smoke and the frustration he had been carrying on his shoulder. “Y/n is one of a kind and she has shown nothing but loyalty and commitment to the regime. She will be a great loss to us but you both knew the bylaws.” He eyed Wakatoshi, “if it was anyone, you both would have been dismissed with dishonor but because you both are highly valued, I could only save you.”

“Tell me,” Wakatoshi began, his voice cold, “where in the bylaws states that a relationship cannot be established between a man and a woman?”

“That is the thing, you were comrades, you made the mistake and treated her like a woman.” He shook his head, “look, Waka – we are men and we have our needs but you should have found someone else, not someone who is your second-in-command.” He killed his cigarette and released the last puff of smoke.

Wakatoshi’s face hardened, “what happened and what was shared between Y/n and I is no one’s business when there are no laws that state that a man and a woman on the same Corp cannot seek a romantic relationship.” His body towered over his leader, making him slightly cower. “I’d like to see where that is written.”

“It – it may not be written but it’s definitely frowned upon.” He did not understand why Wakatoshi was making a big deal out of it. “Do you feel for this woman, Ushijima?”

“I owe you no explanation, I will be clearing my office and you will see and accept my immediate resignation letter by the end of the night.” Wakatoshi was out the door before his leader could utter a word, still processing his words.

Y/n gazed at her old and long-abandoned family home, realizing it had been over 20 years since she had last set foot inside. Pushing the gates open, she entered the property and took stock of the work that awaited her to bring it back to its former glory.

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The basket in her hand has become slightly heavy filled with vegetables and meat as she shopped. Y/n stared across the market at the textile store, seeing various kimonos on display.

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For years, she wore custom uniforms seven days a week, which left her with little need to have kimonos or yukatas, aside from the ones she wore to bed. The few she owned, she had brought with her, but they were all in black. As she examined the yellow kimono with white floral prints, Y/n found herself strangely drawn to it.

“I thought it was you, Y/n.”

Y/n looked up, her eyes widening as a smile graced her lips. “Chigaya Maru.”

She lost count of how many years it had been since she last saw him, from a little boy to a grown adult. His shoulders were broad and well-built, and she couldn’t help but believe that he had likely assumed the mantle of their family’s longstanding sword-smithing business.

“My mom would be so thrilled to hear you have finally returned home.” His expression softened as he smiled, “we’ve all missed you.”

Maru walked beside Y/n in silence as they made their way back to her house. “Come by the shop tomorrow, I’ll show you the pieces I’ve made.”

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They made it to the front gates, “sounds good, I’ll swing by soon. Have a good night, Maru.” She entered the gates, closing them behind her. She waited until she heard Maru’s footsteps fade before entering her home.

Her home still required cleaning and some additional repairs, but it was now habitable, and being in this familiar setting brought her a comforting sense of reassurance.

She laid down on the new futon she purchased and rolled over towards the window. For the first time in her life, she felt so alone.

It hadn’t occurred to her that her team may have been strangers at one point, but they all became brothers to her and became a family to her.

The captain’s face entered her thoughts, and she tightly shut her eyes, feeling the pain in her heart intensify, the ache of missing him becoming almost unbearable. Did he know of her absence by now?

In such a short amount of time that they were intimately involved, she would have never imagined how challenging it would be now to walk away from someone when they made you feel… loved and wanted. And made you feel like a woman.

Her hand slipped down and in between her legs as the place in between her legs ached.

Ushijima Wakatoshi made her addicted to his touch.

Her fingers slipped in between her yukata as she pressed the aching nub before sliding the pad of her fingers along her slit like how he always did it.

Y/n rolled onto her back and widened her legs, her finger teased her clit, rubbing it in circles. A lewd whimper escaped her lips the moment her finger slipped past her folds. “’Toshi…”

Her fingers were nothing compared to his but she tried to mimic his movements.

She let her mind imagine that they were his, that he was there in between her legs and fingering her with not one, or two but three of his thick fingers, curling them each time they were knuckle deep.

Her other hand caresses her chest until she finds her perky nipple, twisting and tugging it.

Wakatoshi never spared her nipples, always suckling them like how she had seen a mother breastfeed her baby. She had never seen a woman nurse a baby before and couldn’t help but be reminded when Wakatoshi’s lips found hers and suckled hard.

The naive Y/n had thought with the way he was suckling, milk would come out. “Toshi… you’re sucking too hard… I don’t have milk for you.” She blurted out.

He lifted his head, caught off guard by her comment. “Of course, you wouldn’t have milk, you aren’t lactating.” He chuckled at the confused expression, “you are not pregnant, you do not need to fret about lactating.”

“But you keep sucking like…” she blushed, turning her face away.

Wakatoshi gently gripped her chin and turned her face so they were looking at one another, “like what?”

“Like a… baby.”

“Like this?” he takes her nipple back into his mouth and suckles hard. “Do you like it when I do that?”

She nodded her head, “yes… I do.”

Y/n’s fingers easily thrust in and out of her pussy with how wet she has become. “Toshi…” she repeated, calling his name as her fingers fastened until her orgasm erupted. Her hot gummy walls squeezed and trembled around her fingers.

She looks down, seeing her legs spread wide and fingers still inside her pussy. She had never touched herself before yet, here she is, pleasuring herself the way Wakatoshi did. Her head falls back onto her pillow as she imagined how he would have cum all over her abdomen, his groan each time spurts ejaculated from the tip of his thick cock. She remembered the first time he had done so, he smeared it over her skin like it was lotion.

Y/n spread her palm over her abdomen, rubbing it like Wakatoshi had always done so. Her hand paused as she thought about her child who was no longer growing within her.

She found it amusing how overnight, she could change from a woman who would not hesitate to kill on sight to a woman who grieved for the child she did not know. She never knew the latter woman even existed in her. In an instant, she no longer wanted to be part of the Corp, the almost maternal instinct within her took over and the new her wanted nothing to do with that lifestyle no more. It was best she left the Corp and returned home to settle quietly and start a new life.

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[Five months later]

A towel pressed along her forehead, dabbing the sweat she wasn’t even aware of. Maru smiled softly down at her, “don’t strain yourself, Y/n.”

Y/n returned the smile and nodded, “don’t worry, I’m not.” She continued to sharpen the katana.

She was blessed with a job with the Chigaya. They were in need of a sword sharpener and that was a specialty Y/n possessed. The business sales increased drastically within days as many sought to have their sword refined.

“It is a mixture of pressure and light-handed when sharpening,” Y/n informed, showing Maru one afternoon. “You must use the right amount of water along with the pressure to stay consistent and prevent any damage to the sword.”

Maru’s father walks in, carrying a sword carefully in his arms. He set it on a stand, “here is another drop-off.” He sighed, his eyes filled with gratitude as he looked at Y/n. For generations, the family business thrived, but since Y/n had joined the team and taken on the role that had remained vacant for two decades, the business had experienced a remarkable resurgence. The word had spread like wildfire, and Chigaya Swords was not attracting clients from far and wide.

“Thank you, I will get to it shortly here,” Y/n answered with a smile. She does the final wipe-down before sliding the sword she was refining back into its scabbard.

“Y/n,” Maru’s father called her name softly, “where did you learn sword sharpening skills?”

“When my grandfather came for me, I stayed with him while he was still serving in the Corp. Being the only girl, I wasn’t exactly welcomed or liked and the man who was in charge of managing the weapons room, allowed me to help when I would always watch him from his doorway.” She is reminded how she was always pestering the man she called Uncle with questions to the point where he just had her try it out for herself. It wasn’t afterward that he realized that she might be useful to him after all and took her in as his apprentice.

When her Uncle was not welding a sword, he was teaching her how to hold a sword, how to swing, and everything there is to know.

At the age of seventeen, her Uncle encouraged her to join the swordsman tournament within the Corp, the winner would be recognized as a member of the Corp. On the day of the event, she shocked the entire crowd but nothing could be counted against her as there were no rules stating a woman could not participate.

She shocked the crowd a second time in one day when she was the last one standing, winning the tournament.

Y/n turned down the offer to join the Corp, insisting she would become a weapon welder.

For the first time, her grandfather, patted her head, “I am proud of you.”

He was murdered during an abrupt attack on the base. Y/n herself was gravely injured but as soon as her wounds healed, she hunted down the man who was responsible for her grandfather’s death and others.

She returned, bloody and battered but with the head of the Colonel.

Maru’s father affectionately patted her head, evoking memories of her grandfather and uncle, the last two who had done so. “We are deeply thankful to you,” he expressed. “Finding a skilled sword sharpener is no easy task. Not everyone possesses the gift touch to refine a blade as you do.” He looks past Y/n and at Maru, “come, I need your help.”

The two men leave the room that has become Y/n’s sanctuary. She reached to touch the top of her head and smiled. Such a simple gesture but it has always warmed her heart and soul.

Y/n peered out the window, her view obscured by the torrential rain. Rainy days had always made her sword-sharpening sessions feel therapeutic. Her gaze then shifted to the last remaining sword, the one Maru’s father had recently delivered.

She let out a sigh and extended her hand toward the sword.

Just as her hand was about to make contact with it, something jolted her, causing her hand to freeze in mid-air, a mere centimeters away from the sword. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest as she instantly recognized the handle of the sword.

“Your sword, Lord Ushijima,” Y/n spoke softly, carefully lifting the sword with both hands and offering it to him. “I hope you won’t mind that I completed your sword for you. We both know… Uncle would have been honored to present you with this blade.”

Uncle had just completed the construction of a custom-made sword for Lord Ushijima Wakatoshi, only to succumb to a fatal medical condition shortly thereafter. When Y/n and the others discovered him, he wore a serene smile on his face, having peacefully departed from the world.

“I’ve made some adjustments to the handle,” she said, lifting the sword above her head. “I believe a longer handle will be more fitting for you, especially since you swing with your left hand. This added length will provide both increased flexibility and stability in your swings.”

Y/n’s hands trembled as she gingerly lifted the sword. Among the swords she worked on so far, the Captain’s sword was the only one she knew of that had an additional inch and a half added to the handle.

There was but one way to confirm the sword’s owner. With a gentle pull of the scabbard, she revealed the blade, and as she turned it, her breath caught her throat.

As the final touch before handing the sword to its rightful owner, she meticulously engraved the letterings: Shiratorizawa – Ushijima Wakatoshi

E/n: next part might be shorter or like half of this.

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@queenelleee @mfreedomstuff @erintaro @callmeraider @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wolffmaiden @cloud-lyy

#haikyuu smut #haikyu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu angst #haikyuu ushijima #haikyuu ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi smut #ushijima wakatoshi angst #ushijima wakatoshi x y/n #ushijima wakatoshi x read #ushijima x reader #ushijima smut #ushijima x y/n #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x you

[hiraethwa]

one summer day

01 clear skies. where you run into the last person you want to see, ushijima

<< 00 guidepost. | >> 02 fly high. | << the collection >>

pairing: ushijima wakatoshi x reader a/n: i’ve made small changes to the prologue that i felt did not line up with the tone of the following chapters… enjoy! - avery word count: 1k warnings: mentions of fear of parents, cursing terms: nii-chan -- older brother, baka -- stupid/foolish

june, first year

“shit” you curse as you run down the school hallways towards the volleyball gym. the violin case slung across your back thudding on your back with each stride, reminding you of your breathlessness.

you had stayed back after practice ended to make sure you had your parts right, and had completely lost track of time. you could only hope your brother is ready to go, otherwise… you shudder at the thought of the consequences of being late. 

pulling back the sleeve of your jacket, you look at the time again. goddamnit, my legs are so slow– shit– you see a shape in front of you out of the corner of your eye and swerve to the other side. shoes skid against the smooth wood floors as you lose your balance. 

to your surprise, your body stops before hitting the floor. your arm was flung out in front of you, bracing for impact against the floor, but it never came. then you felt it, a warm pressure on your other wrist. oh– the person you avoided running into had saved you from falling. 

regaining your balance (and your composure), you straighten and bow, “thank you!” your cheeks turn pink with embarrassment of a stranger seeing your almost fall. 

“you should be more careful” the voice that spoke sounded familiar, deep like the rumbling of the earth. huh? who– you take a peek at the owner of the voice. shorts in the shiratorizawa purple shade, with the standard school issued track jacket of the same shade running down the arms on a white clad torso. your brother’s practice outfit for the boys’ volleyball team. but at the same time, even though you are outside the volleyball gym, it could be any other boys’ sports outfit too, so it couldn’t be, right? 

you raise your head, praying to the gods that never answered you. nope. lady luck is so not on your side today. it is ushijima.

“sorry. i will be more careful next time.” you give him a sheepish smile about your clumsiness, raising a hand to scratch the back of your head. half hoping he would forget about you from the incident a few weeks ago, you slowly inch away from him. (you had not returned to the gym since that day from the embarrassment of your actions that your brother did not let you live down)

he frowns at you. “wait. you are hurt.” 

questions pop in your head. you are not hurt. in fact, he had just saved you from hurting yourself, so you had no idea what he is on about at all. 

you raise your eyebrow at him. earlier panic forgotten and all. he points at his own cheek. “wait here.” oh right. you had snapped a string during orchestra practice earlier. there was a burning sensation where it made contact with your face, but you thought it was just a light graze and forgot about it. 

setting your violin case down next to you, you plop yourself on the steps leading into the gym as you wonder about how serious the wound was to make a complete stranger worry. hm. 

“here.” ushijima returns with the first aid kit from the gym and seats himself next to you while he goes through the contents of the box. he pulls out a disinfectant wipe, some gauze and tape. “it might hurt.”

his hand is gentle against your cheek as you face away from him to give him a good look at the cut. you tense, clenching your teeth as the solution touches your flesh, and it burns. then you feel a cool gel being applied to your wound. the sound of a medical tape being pulled and torn off. he presses the gauze on your face lightly before securing it with the tape.

you touch your face, feeling his handiwork, and where the gauze is sitting on your face. “thanks ushijima-san.” while your older brother had taken care of you since you can remember, patching your wounds from your clumsiness and wiping your tears away when you feel lost, no one else out of your family had taken care of you like this before. or rather, you never had someone who was that close to you. even now, the closest friend you have is semi, and you have known him for a little under two months, with the unlikely friendship that grew between you. 

surprise colors ushijima’s face. “you know my name?” although it comes out more as a statement than a question. 

“my brother told me. he’s the setter on your team.” you fidget with the bandage, worried if he would think that you are weird for asking about him. 

“ah, miyamura-san.” he nods his face in recognition as he stows the items back into the box and clicks it shut. “well then, i will see you around.” 

you dust your skirt off as you stand up with him. “thanks again.” you open your mouth about to say something else before your brother jogs over to the two of you. 

“y/n! there you are. i completely lost of track of time–” he stops abruptly, glancing from the wound on your face to the first aid kit that ushijima is holding. eyes narrowing onto ushijima, “did you hurt my sister?” he places his hand on ushijima’s shoulder solemnly albeit menacingly. 

“nii-chan! it’s your fault! i had to wait so long for you. my violin string snapped during practice and he helped me bandage it,” you smack him in the head and start to drag him away. he makes a non-committal noise, relenting to your actions. 

all this while, both of you did not give ushijima a chance to explain himself. he steps to the side, quietly amused by the antics of you and his normally serious senpai. 

“apologize!”

“you’re siding with an outsider instead of your brother now?!” 

“you were clearly in the wrong!” 

“no!”

you turn and bow to ushijima, silently showing gratitude and apology for your dumb brother’s words before whispering to your brother, “baka, mom is going to kill us both” and just like that, your brother flinches. the shiratorizawa setter who is unshakable on court, flinches at the mention of your mother. 

well, that’s one thing you share in common.

#one summer day #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x you #ushijima wakatoshi x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima x reader #ushijima x you #ushijima x y/n #ushijima fluff #ushijima angst #ushijima wakatoshi fluff #ushijima wakatoshi angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #semi eita #shiratorizawa #wakatoshi x reader #hq wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi haikyuu #haikyuu wakatoshi #ushijima x reader fluff #ushijima x reader angst

[satoujo]

!disclaimer none of the works featured on this blog belong to me. all reachable creators were asked for permission to have their work linked on here

main directory

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

➵ series: story consisted of multiple chapters

➵ one-shot: a single piece of standalone work; can be any length, such as from 1k to 80k words

➵ drabbles: short piece of writing; typically under 1k words and usually around 100 words

➵ blurbs & others: small short description, headcanons, etc.

❀ = fluff ⋆˚ ✧ = angst ⋆˚ ♡ = smut ⋆˚ ✉ = crack

SERIES

tba

ONE-SHOT

tba

DRABBLE

tba

BLURBS & OTHERS

tba

#ushijima wakatoshi angst #ushijima wakatoshi smut #ushijima wakatoshi fluff #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x you #ushijima x reader #ushijima x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you

[ilylovelyz]

⍣ ೋ the times they cried because of you

☆ includes ushijima, iwaizumi, atsumu, kageyama, bokuto

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI — he never cries. you met this guy when the two of you were young freshman in high-school, and you quickly became a good friend of his. that being said, you never saw him cry. even when the two of you began dating in your senior year, you still never did. years passed, and it was the same as the previous years. sure, he occasionally got upset, but even then, he still put on a stoic display, never really letting you in on that side of him. even at your wedding, he sure showed some emotion but he didn't cry. then came the birth of your first child.

"she's so cute, isn't she 'toshi..?" you said weakly, forehead still damp with sweat, bodu trembling with the aftershocks of your hard, long labor. your eyes fluttered open, focusing on the sight of your dear wakatoshi holding your newborn baby.

your heart fluttered at the soft image of your husband holding the tiny baby closely again his chest, his forehead mere inches away from the baby's forehead. it was barely there, barely noticeable. if it weren't for the reflection of light, then you wouldn't have been able to see the way his eyes were glazed over, corners red, tears brimming at the borderlines of his eyes.

he was so memorized, so in love with this product of you, this product of his and your love. god, you just make him the happiest guy on earth.

with a grunt, he sniffled lightly, trying to mask his emotions. "yeah.."

IWAIZUMI HAJIME — he hates crying. but being the responsible and knowing person he is, he knows that crying is inevitable. but the "strong", reliable guy in him wants to punch himself every-time he feels his eyes sting at the feel of salty tears brimming at his waterline. unbeknownst to you, he would avoid you every-time he felt like he was going to cry, usually hiding in the locked confides of the bathroom. he thought he was hiding it well, until one fateful day where it all came crashing down..

"haji?" you said on the other side of the door. he immediately shot up, his eyes darting to the doorknob. he always made sure to lock it, but today, he was just so exhausted and down that the idea of a lock was forgotten. crap, "hey wait-," before he could even rise up from his slouched kneeling position on the bathtub's side, you opened the door unknowingly. "i just need my–hajime?"

there he was, in all of his fucking glory, hunched over, his face long and clearly expressing his hurt feelings. his heart fell to his stomach, his vision going cloudy as his day just kept getting worse. "hajime?" you called out once more, only your tone had softened, more light and tender. you reached a hand out to him, eyes full of concern. he couldn't help but jolt away from your hand, eyebrows furrowing at your softness.

he didn't like your tone. why are you looking at him like that? like some sad kicked puppy lost in the middle of nowhere? it made him feel so small, so weak. "haji.. are you okay?" you whispered, crouching down to his level outside of the bathtub. you attempted yet again to touch the side of his face, lightly pressing your fingertips against his cheekbone before fully pressing your palm against the side of his face.

his lips trembled as he was just a second away from breaking down, his eyes locked on a single object as to hold on to the last of his will. you sighed softly at his resistance, of course he wouldn't want to cry in front of you, but you don't understand why, afterall, what makes a person weak for crying? "it's okay, hajime."

with that, fat tears finally ran down his cheeks, his eyes shutting close as he finally broke at your words. he could only grab onto your hand as you climbed into the tub, his head going straight into your chest as he sobbed and wailed.

MIYA ATSUMU — surprisingly, you've seen this guy cry many of times before. he cried when getting accepted into nationals, winning nationals, just crying at things any normal person would do. but he never cried for you. no, he held himself to higher standards. he'd never cry for someone, not even for you. yeah, he loved you, but he wasn't about to cry for someone like a little child. all high and mighty, he never thought you would actually have an affect on him like you do now. him being someone who wears his heart proudly on his sleeve, he found himself getting into an argument late at night with you, too prideful to back down.

"are you serious atsumu?! you know i'd never do that!" you yelled, voice hoarse and scratchy due to the ongoing screaming match between you and your boyfriend. "oh really?! then why were ya' 'll over that fucker earlier? huh?!" he yelled back, pointing out the way you were seemingly flirting with a guy at the club earlier.

but you weren't? you would never do that, you're not a scum. "what?! we were just talking?! am i not allowed to TALK to people atsumu?" you scoffed, arms crossing defensively. "if you wanna consider talking as flirting, then let's talk about that girl you were laughing with the other day? huh? let's talk about that!"

his eyebrow raised at your counter, fumbling nervously as he wondered what to say. "w-wh- you know what?! fuck you! i don't know why i'm even dating a bitch like you!" he said, almost immediately regretting his words when he saw the way your eye's widened at his harsh words. the apartment was finally silent as you registered his words, he wishes you had any sort of expression on your face, but you had nothing but a stoic and emotionless face.

"okay then," you finally said, arching your eyebrow in a taunting way, resting your hand down on your hip. "bye." you followed, grabbing your bag and your keys, turning your back on him.

he watched, frozen in his spot as you exited out the apartment with your composure. his body jolted when he heard the slam of the front door, finally letting out that breath he was unknowingly holding. he scoffed at what you said, clenching his jaw tightly as he tried to hold onto his pride. "damn it." he said.

he felt the tear roll down his cheek before he could even register that he was crying. "..damn it!"

KAGEYAMA TOBIO — to him, life is volleyball. his childhood consisted nothing of volleyball, and so will his adulthood. maybe his obsession with volleyball was a little extreme, but you never really minded. he respected you greatly for your patience, he wasn't dumb, he knew that his priority of volleyball was evident, so he always tried to make it up to you by spending time with you whenever you wanted. but it seemed like after awhile, he began to take your patience for granted. it wasn't until the nth time when he didn't show up for the nth date was when he realized.

kageyama was careful to shut the front door as quiet as he could, tiptoeing as he took off his shoes and walked throughout the dark hallways and into the master-bedroom. he jolted like a cat when he sat you sitting up on the side of the bed, back facing the doorway.

"y-you scared me. what are you doing up at this time? it's nearly 10PM." he stuttered obliviously. it was silent for a few seconds before you sighed, slowly turning your head to face him. "you forgot." you muttered before turning back to look at the wall. forgot? forgot what? it was then he noticed the way your hair was done, still clad in a pretty dress.

"o-oh.. the date! i-i'm sorry y/n, i promise i can make it up to you"— "don't bother." you interrupted, voice stern yet monotonous. what do you mean 'don't bother?' you love going on dates don't you? his lips pursed into a straight line, chewing on his bottom lips nervously. "w-what do you mean? i really promise, this thursday i have a free day.." he trailed off when you suddenly stood up from the bed.

"i mean that i think we should break up." his heart dropped at your words, eyes widening. break up? his mouth was agape, mind spinning with different solutions and apologies. before he could detest, you walked over to the corner of the room, pulling up a suitcase that he didn't even notice.

"b-but why? you said yourself that me and you are meant to be together?" he cried out, quickly rushing over to your side and grabbing onto your wrist. he watched your face closely, eyes taking note of every single feature of yours. you inhaled deeply, still refusing to look at him.

"i said that when we were in high-school and didn't have any major responsibilities. things have changed, we aren't in high-school any more. you're now a pro-volleyball player with big responsibilities, and i'm.. someone who clearly has too much time on their hands, wasting it on someone who can't give me any of theirs. it's not your fault, kageyama, but we just don't align anymore."

you finally said, tugging your hand away from his grasp. before you could take a step, his hands were once again on you, gripped onto your shoulders, forcing you to look at him. "but.. you said you would be there for my game at nationals.." he whimpered out, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

it was then, when you were finally walking out of his apartment, out of his life, was when he finally did realize, that maybe, he did take your patience for granted..

BOKUTO KOUTARO — this guy cries a lot. he's cried so many times you might have to start writing it down somewhere. he rarely masks his emotions, he's an open book. thats what you love so much about him, that he's so open and honest. you love the way he's so eager and sweet, you love the way he's always willing to talk to you and so damn clingy it's like you have your own personal koala. aside from the times he's happy, he's sad, sad because he didn't perform well, or because you didn't kiss him. but you never really made him cry, you'd never do that. or so you thought.

"y/n!! i missed you!" you hear a booming voice yell, his footsteps speeding up at the sight you. he paid no mind when you didn't respond to him, as you were currently hunched over the your work desk, laptop gleaming at you brightly. your back was turned to him, so you were basically calling him for a back hug.

"y/n!" — "not now koutaro." you interrupted, tone serious and stern. he raised his eyebrows at you with surprise, his arms a few inches away from your shoulders as they stilled in their preparation to hug you. "babe? is something wrong?" he asked curiously, lips pouting at your stern denial. you never decline a hug. you love them. right?

"i'm working. can't you see that?" you spit out, sighing deeply. you pull away your cramping fingers away from your keyboard, rubbing them over your sore eyes. "my gosh." you mumble under your breath, eyebrows intensely furrowed with stress. you had been working for a few hours straight, staring at nothing but a bright screen with words that were becoming incoherent to you.

you yelp out when you're suddenly pulled from your chair, being lifted up into bokuto's strong arms as he spins you around. "don't be so sad!" he says cheerfully, hoping to cheer you up with a big warm hug. only— this seems to make you mad. "put me down, koutaro!" you yell, pushing his chest away and forcing him to practically drop you.

"don't you see i'm working?! why are you so damn clingy? you're so annoying, god, why don't you just leave me alone?" you spit out. your words are like venom, stinging his heart greatly as his hair is quickly deflating once your words reach his ears. you simply return to your laptop once you've finished, typing mindlessly once more.

him? annoying? he didn't mean to annoy you..

he couldn't help but softly whimper, left standing in shock. he opened his mouth to say something before your previous words were reminding him to stay silent—leave me alone. he clutched his palms, looking at your turned back with teary eyes. he hopes you don't find him annoying for long..

#haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu!! smut #haikyuu pregnant #haikyu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu angst #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x reader #iwaizumi hajime #haikyuu iwaizumi #iwaizumi x reader #atsumu miya #haikyuu atsumu #atsumu x reader #kageyama tobio #haikyuu kageyama #bokuto koutarou #haikyuu bokuto #bokuto x reader

[kentobb]

The Promise

Character: Ushijima Wakatoshi x F!Reader

Warnings: Heavy angst, cursing, slight comfort on the end.

It has been a rough month and Ushijima knows it. He has been overworking himself, pushing his limits at each practice. His typically calm and composed face is now etched with stress and strain. His temperament, once steady as a rock, is now volatile and erratic, akin to a stormy sea. The month had been grueling, a relentless onslaught of training sessions and personal workouts. His body is aching, his mind is strained, and his spirit is beginning to waver.

Today, he returns to his apartment later than usual, bone-tired, his muscles screaming in protest, only to be greeted by your sight, his sweet and loving girlfriend. Your smile always warm, eyes filled with concern, having dinner ready, a hot bath drawn, and comforting words falling from your lips.

He should feel guilty for his recent behavior, matter of fact he should apologize. He was not a man prone to emotional outbursts or thoughtless actions, and yet, he had allowed his stress to control him, to turn him into someone he hardly recognized these days.

He had ignored you, brushed off your attempts at conversations, and retreated into himself. He had been mean, cold, distant. He had forgotten your presence, forgotten the warmth you brought into his life, forgotten the love that had once made his heart flutter.

And tonight was no different, the weight of the day pressing heavily on his shoulders, his mind foggy and his spirit was weary. As he kicked off his shoes and hung his jacket on the hook, the tantalizing aroma of dinner wafted through the apartment. He followed the scent into the kitchen, his eyes landing on the sight of you, sitting at the kitchen table, a spread of dishes laid out in front of you.

You looked up the entrance and your face lights up with a smile that reaches your eyes. A sight that used to warm his heart, a sight that used to make him forget about exhaustion, a sight that used to make him feel loved.

“‘Toshi, you’re home!” You smiled happily.

But today, he could only muster a tired sigh in response. He saw you on your feet in an instant, your chair scraping against the floor as you rushed towards him. Your arms wrapped around him in a tight hug, your warmth seeping into him. But he didn’t return the hug, didn’t wrap his arms around you, didn’t press a kiss to your forehead like he always does. He just stood there, his body rigid, his mind elsewhere.

You pulled away, you don’t know if it is out of embarrassment or…due to a sudden heartbreak due to the neglect you have been suffering, but your hands suddenly cup his face, eyes searching his for a sign of the man you loved. “Um, we should, well, you should go eat,” You urged, your voice soft and your touch gentle. But he shook his head, his voice coming out gruff as he muttered, “I’m tired.”

But you didn’t back down this time, didn’t let him retreat into himself like he has done all this month. You tugged at his hand, tried to lead him to the table with the dinner you worked very hard for, trying to make him eat. “Come on, Toshi, you been avoiding me this past month,” You insisted, your voice firm, your grip tight. “Just be here, yeah?” You smiled.

But he snapped. “For fuck sakes Y/N, I’m tired!” He barked, his voice louder that he intended, his tone harsher than he meant. He yanked his hand out of your grip, his eyes flashing with a mixture of frustration and exhaustion. “You have been nagging me all these past nights to have fucking dinner and you don’t understand that I am tired.” He yelled again.

The silence that followed was deafening, the tension in the room palpable. You took a step back, embarrassed that your boyfriend had to yelled at you like that, “Ah, sorry, I just thought—“ You were saying but were cut off immediately by his sharp words.

“Thought what? Thought what, Y/N?” He yelled in disbelief, “That you have been a pain in the ass for the past few days?” He asked as he raised his voice louder, tone meaner.

“I-I’m sorry,” You apologized, trying to mask your disappointment, “I have missed you…” You mumbled embarrassedly, trying to hide your flushed face from him.

“Missed me?” He yelled, “We live in the same fucking apartment and we see each other every night!” He yelled, his voice echoing in the quiet apartment.

“I- I know, I know, Toshi,” You said, trying to calm him down, “B-But we haven’t been able to talk, you haven’t kissed me or touched me…” You admit painfully as you looked at him with teary eyes.

“God, you’re so fucking clingy and needy,” He yells as he rolled his eyes out of frustration. “All of this mess because of that?” He chuckled, “I am tired for this crap right now.” He said.

The room fell silent, the tension hanging heavy in the air. He watched your face fall, your eyes reflecting the hurt his words had caused. And guilt washed over him like a tidal wave, his heart clenching at your sight.

You know he didn’t mean any single word of it, right? He was just tired, so incredibly tired. His days were filled with endless practices, his nights consumed by restless sleep. He was pushing himself to the brink, his body and mind paying the price.

He didn’t mean it.

“Sorry,” You mumbled, “I will clean the mess,” You said as you hid your face away from his, walking towards the kitchen again.

His mind raced, guilt and regret swirling within him. He wanted to apologize, to explain, to make you understand that fuck, he didn’t mean any of it. But the words wouldn’t come, his throat tight with emotion. He was trapped in his own guilt, his own exhaustion, his own regret. And he didn’t know how to escape.

He watched from the doorway as you busied yourself in the kitchen, cleaning up the dinner he had refused to eat. His heart clenching at the sight, guilt gnawing at his insides. He had been harsh, mean even, and he regretted it.

Your movements were mechanical, your usual cheerfulness replaced with a somber silence. He watched as you wiped the table clean, packed the uneaten food, and washed the dishes. Your shoulders are tense, lips pressed into a thin line.

And he noticed, noticed how you tried to compose yourself, how you tried to hold back the tears. But despite your efforts, a few escaped, trailing down your cheeks and disappearing into the collar of your shirt. Each tear was a stab to his heart, a painful reminder of the hurt he had caused.

Once you were done, you turned off the lights, plunging the kitchen into the darkness. The only sound was the sound of the soft padding of your feet as you made your way to the bedroom, where he was waiting.

Both of you sat on opposite sides of the bed, an uncomfortable silence hanging between both of you. He watched as you changed into your sleeping clothes, your movements slow and deliberate. You climbed into bed, your back to him, body curling up on your side.

He was at a loss. He didn’t knew what to do, didn’t know what to say. He was worried, his mind filled with the thoughts of you, of the hurt he had caused. He knew you had taken his words to heart, knew that you were hurting. And it was all of his fault.

In the dimly lit room, his silhouette was barely visible as he climbed into bed next to you. The only sound that broke silence was your soft, muffled sobs. His heart clenched at the sound. He reached out tentatively, his hands finding their way around your waist. He drew you close, his chest against your back, both of your hearts beating in a rhythm that was painfully off sync.

He leaned in, pressing his lips against your swollen and teary face, tasting the saltiness of your tears. “I’m sorry,” He whispered into your hair, his voice barely audible. His words hung heavy in the air, a confession and a plea all at once.

You remained silent, sobs subsiding into quiet sniffles. And he could feel your body stiffen at his words. It was an unspoken tension that made his heart race with worry. He wanted to say more, you deserved way more, to explain, to ask for forgiveness, but the words stuck in his throat.

“Talk to me, love.” He implored, his voice barely a whisper. His fingers tracing circles on your waist, a silent plea for you to respond.

But you don’t. Your silence was deafening wrapping you both in a shroud of uncertainty. And he held you tighter, his mind racing with thoughts and fears. He didn’t know what was going to happen next, and that scared him.

The morning sun streamed through the window, casting a warm glow over the room. He stirred, his eyes fluttering open to a new day. His body felt heavy, his heart even more so. The events of the previous night replayed in his mind like a haunting melody.

He found you in the kitchen, a solitary figure bathed in the morning light. You were cradling a cup of coffee, your gaze fixed in the steaming liquid. Your face was pale, eyes rimmed with red. The sight of you, so vulnerable and distant, twisted his heart.

“Good morning,” he tried, he really did, his voice echoing in the silence. But you didn’t respond, didn’t even lift your gaze to meet his. It was as if he was a ghost, unseen, unheard. He felt a pang of guilt, a sharp reminder of his words last night.

“For fuck sakes Y/N.”

“You have been nagging me all these past nights to have fucking dinner and you don’t understand that I am tired.”

“God, you’re so fucking clingy and needy.”

His mind was whirlwind of thoughts. He had hoped that giving you space would help, that it would give you time to heal, time to warm up to him like you always do. But as the day dragged on, the silence between both of you grew. His phone remained silent, devoid of your usual messages.

No updates about your day, no reminders about dinner, nothing.

It was a silence that spoke volumes, and it terrified him.

Who would have thought? Ushijima Wakatoshi, the man who faced countless opponents on the court, was scared. He was scared that his actions had created a chasm between you, a distance he didn’t knew how to bridge.

As he returned from practice on the night, the apartment was dark. The usually welcoming lights were all turned off, a stark reminder of the cold silence that awaited him. He knew you would be in bed, probably feigning sleep. There would be no warm welcome, no home-cooked meal, no soft smiles.

He lingered at the door, his hand hovering over the knob. He took a deep breath, steeling himself for the silence that awaited him. As he stepped into the dark apartment, he couldn’t shake off the feeling of dread that clung to him. He was walking into a battlefield, and he didn’t know how to fight this war.

The silence was deafening, a stark contrast to the noise of the world outside. He stepped in, his heart heavy with the weight of unspoken words. The sight of the shared room, bathed in the soft glow of the moonlight, was a painful reminder of the happier times.

There you were, a small figure curled up on the bed, your back to him just like last night. Your eyes were open, staring blankly at the window. The sadness in your gaze was palpable, a silent cry for help that tore at his heart.

He took off his shoes, placing his gym bag in the kitchen before making his way towards you. He tried to speak, to break the silence that hung between both of you.

“How are you?” He asked softly, but his words fell on deaf ears. You didn’t respond, didn’t even acknowledge his presence.

Undeterred, he climbed onto the bed, his large frame curling around your smaller one. His hands found their way to your waist, pulling you closer, making you face him. He kissed your forehead, your cheeks, each kiss a silent promise to make things right.

And then he hears it, he hears you crying. Tears falling like rain, burying your face on his chest and soaking his shirt. Your sobs were heart-wrenching, a testament to the pain he had caused.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice choked with emotion. He held you tightly, as if his touch could somehow ease the pain he had caused. His apologies were a soft murmur against your hair, a desperate plea for forgiveness.

He gently lifted your face, fingers tracing the contours of your features. His lips found yours in a tender kiss, a silent vow of his love for you. He kissed away your salty tears, each one a testament to her pain, each one a reminder of his mistakes.

“I love you,” He whispered, his voice barely audible. His words were soft, filled with emotion so raw yet so powerful that it took his breath away. He repeated the words over and over, a mantra of love and regret.

Slowly, your sobs subsided. Your breathing evened out, your body relaxing against his. Falling asleep in his arms, your tear-streaked face buried in his chest. He watched you sleep, his heart aching with relief and regret.

He ran his fingers through your hair, his touch gentle and soothing. His eyes welled up with tears, the guilt and regret overwhelming him. He kisses your forehead, a silent promise etched into your skin.

“This is the last time,” He vowed to himself, his voice chocked with emotion. “This is the last time I’ll make you cry,” He promised.

He held you close, his arms a protective shield around you.

Reblogs, notes and comments are appreciated <3

#haikyuu #hq fluff #hq angst #haikyuu angst #haikyuu fluff #angst #fluff #ushijima wakatoshi #wakatoshu ushijima #ushijima x reader #ushijima x y/n

[natriae]

Ushi gushi who u dated thru highschool and 2nd year college and he is getting hornier but all u guys have done so far is make out and hand job/fingering till u ask if he wants to go further and BOY does he and u see a side of him u never imagine 😍

HEHEH KICKING MY FEET AND GIGGLING RN

Ushijima Wakatoshi is no doubt the best boyfriend ever. He spoils you and always makes time for you. He would drop everything to go see you, but he's still wakatoshi. He has a hard time with social cues and displaying his emotions. You like to call yourself the 'Toshi master. Usually able to understand his affection and thoughts without him showing it.

He's remained the same since highschool. He stuck to the same routine with little differences in the past years. He'd wake up do his morning run, then go to class, practice, then shower and do his homework, and finally cuddle you to sleep in his dorm. Saturdays were specifically reserved for you. He tried to leave his comfort zone by taking you on dates, but you knew he perfered to stay in. You did too, so it was no issue for you to spend every Saturday with Wakatoshi at your house back in highschool. He found comfort getting groceries with you and helping you clean. He found comfort in really anything that took his mind off his family.

There was a lot of feelings that Wakatoshi missed out, but with therapy and you supporting him along the way he got better at understand what he was feeling. Being away from his mother definitely helped as well.

Even with all his amazing qualities there were sometimes you felt insecure in your relationship. Going to college was a much different territory for both of you. Students from all around Japan went to school with you guys. At Shiratorizawa no one really talked to 'Jima because they were scared of him but here you can't remember a game where some girl wasn't flirting with him. Or even listening to how far your friends have gotten with their boyfriends. It's not that you want to force 'toshi out of his comfort zone, but sometimes you think he doesn't like you..like that. Almost like it's out of obligation.

After date night he asks if you want it instead of getting in the mood. Almost like it's apart of his routine. You guys eat, come home, he kisses you a bit and fingers you till you cum, and then he washes his hands and kisses you goodnight. You want him to do it for his own pleasure.

"everything okay?" He asks once he finishes washing the dishes. He walks over to the small couch you sat on while in deep thought.

Looking up at him you smile at his cute face. Bring your arms up signaling you want a hug. Lifting you up he places you on his lap as he sits down. You legs draped over his as your wrap your arms around his neck, resting your head on his chest. "I guess, I've just been thinking...'Jima you find me attractive, right?" Looking up you watch as he nods his head. His eyes srunching a little in thought. Your hand resting on his chest feels his heart begin to beat a little bit faster. " um, remember when Tendou had-um- remember in highschool when tendou was quite aroused and everyone made fun of him?"

"his boner?" Ushijima states unbothered.

Your face reddens at his outburst and you nod your head. "well why don't- you dont seem to get that when your with me, and I was worried that you dont feel that way about me, and I don't want you to be doing anything you find uncomfortable if you dont feel that way about me." While you ramble you start to feel a small poking at the side of your right butt cheek. "'Jima?"

His faces flushes a bit and his heart beats after as he brings his lips into his mouth. "I do feel that way about you." He says, not looking into your eyes.

Bringing your hand up to his cheek you move his head so the two of you can look at each other. "why don't you ever show it?" you pout.

"i don't want to make you uncomfortable." He tells you, face remaining unmoving. You watch as his pupils expand looking into your eyes. "Meditating usually helps it go away." He tells you like it was a serious issue. You giggle and move into kiss his lips.

"Do you still have those condoms Tendou gave you?"

His single nod is all you need to tell you that tonight you won't have to worry about Wakatoshi's attraction towards you.

#haikyuu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima #wakatoshi ushijima #ushijima smut #wakatoshi fluff #haikyuu wakatoshi #wakatoshi x reader #wakatoshi smut #hq wakatoshi #hq ushijima #hq headcanons #hq imagines #hq fanfic #hq angst #hq smut #hq x reader #hq fluff #hq #haikyū!! #haikyuu angst #haikyu x reader

[sunflowerrosewood]

Your First Fight and Makeup Headcanon ~ Ushijima Wakatoshi

Author's Note: Since my other account @cheekyredwillow got deleted. I am adding some of my favorite fanfictions to this account and revamping this one with new ones. I hope to make an actual list of fandoms I am still a fan of! NO requests for the time being.

On to the headcanon!

Fight Fight

~You and Ushijima have been dating a few months and you have gotten used to his intense training schedule

~He is not normally home often and when he is, he is usually ready to go to bed

~ You've gotten used to the busy schedule and it was fine for a while

~But when it went on and on and on

~You felt worn down as you can't remember the last time you two had a night together

~When you would bring it up to Ushijima, he would say he would plan something at some point but he was busy

~So it hurt when nothing was planned over time

~Ushijima came home from practice and you were waiting for him with a hug

~He came in and walked past you. He mentioned having a long day training and wanted to take a shower.

~So you told him that you would wait for him with dinner which he just agreed and walked away.

~As Ushijima finished his shower, he came out to see you and he sat down. He began eating quietly

~You mentioned going out for a date and Ushijima rolled his eyes

"Y/n, what did I say to you. I will schedule one eventually. You knew dating me would get this schedule." He growled as you turned your head down.

"Well I haven't heard anything in a bit nor seen anything planned. I wanted to ask. I miss our dates Toshi." You said softly as he sighed.

"I have a busy schedule you knew this." Ushijima said and stood up. "I'm going to bed. Come when you want to."

~Ushijima stormed off and went to bed leaving you in the kitchen alone

~You let some tears fall down and stayed at the table. You got up and cleaned the plates.

~After that argument, you felt bad about it. So when you got ready for bed, you decided to not cuddle against him like usual. You left him on his side

Make Up

~ You haven't been cuddling against him for a couple of weeks now. You've just been a ghost fixing dinner and welcoming him home

~You felt yourself getting drained by this

~As for Ushijima, he was at practice trying to come to terms with what was going on

~He was losing you quickly and he did not know what to do

~He talked with some of his teammates and his manager and they all mentioned going home to you

~As he returned home, he saw a duffle by the door, he felt panic hit his chest and ran to the bedroom

~You were packing a small bag and Ushijima ran in. His eyes were with wide with panic

"What's going on?" you heard Ushijima exclaim. You hadn't heard that emotion in a while.

"Ushijima, I'm taking a few days for myself. Just need to clear my head and think about us." You said softly.

You began to turn and were met with Ushijima's hard chest. You looked up and Ushijima held your face.

"Don't go Y/n. What do I need to do to fix this?" He asked as you shook your head.

"You have a busy schedule Ushijima and I'm wanting a relationship. We have two different things going on and two different outlooks. I-I don't know if this can work long term." You said softly and felt Ushijima's hands on your face.

"Y/n, I don't want to lose you." Ushijima said.

"I can't do this. I need something. And these past few weeks have been nothing. I can't." You said as Ushijima pulled and hugged you. "Wha-What?"

"I'm sorry Y/n. I don't know relationships very well. You are my first long term. I'm so sorry. Tell me what to do."

"Toshi, I don't want this entire thing to change. I just want us to go on some dates here and there. And I want to feel like we're in a relationship. The whole kissing when you get home and cuddling in bed. That's all." You said as a few tears fell from your eyes.

"I will try to work on that for you." Ushijima said softly and brushed your tears.

~The two of you went to bed that night with Ushijima's arm wrapped around you

~He kissed your temple before falling asleep against you

~You cuddled against him and fell asleep quickly

~Within the next few days, Ushijima was working little by little with you

~From planning and going on a little date to kissing when he gets home to even having a movie night before he goes to bed

~You brightened up and felt this relationship blossom for the better. Ushijima felt a ton better seeing you happy. He also felt like the relationship was on a better footing.

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanon #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu angst to fluff #haikyuu fluff #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x reader #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima x you #ushijima fluff #haikyuu ushijima x reader

[mrs-kodzuken]

Can I have a timeskip!Ushijima comfort fic? Like Ushi doesn't understand the concept of skinship like holding hands and hugs so he often shrugs off reader's attempts in skinships, which of course made reader feel sad ㅠㅠ

Thank you and have a nice day! <3

Understanding you ♡

Pairing: Aged up! Wakatoshi Ushijima x fem!reader

WC: 1.6k

Genre: slight angst to comfort/fluff

CW: fem!reader, inexperienced in relationships!Wakatoshi, slight angst from ushi :( , fluff and comfort all in the end :)) , maybe some self deprecation from reader, best friends with tendou, communication is always key

note: thank you for requesting this! I hope it’s up to your expectations, sugar!! <3

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

Being the girlfriend of the Wakatoshi Ushijima was something I didn’t expect would hurt this much. As his girlfriend, I understood the importance of volleyball since it quite literally is his career path. However, being in a relationship is a whole other aspect to think about.

There never really was anything that really stood out to me about his wrongdoings. He always made it to every dinner plan, he didn’t forget the classic month to month anniversaries, he seemed like he was just a gift from heaven.

I knew it was too good to be true when I realized we, or I, was severely lacking in the physical department of our relationship.

Ushijima and I never really got closer within touching or skin-ship distance. That really sucked for me and hurt my feelings since he aced every other aspect of our relationship, no pun intended.

I wasn’t sure if he was just uncomfortable with touching me or if he had some kind of weird feeling about touching me. However, with physical touch being my number one priority of love language I wasn’t sure how to go about telling him my feelings.

Giving Wakatoshi free rein to plan out his schedule, except for date nights, was a must. He is a grown man and I’m not his mother, but I always felt bad when there was something important, like this, to be talked about.

I couldn’t help but to bite my lip as I stared at our private text messages. His contact name, ‘Ushi baby’ stared right back at me whilst I tried to work up the courage to send a text.

Deciding against it, I threw my phone onto my bed and sighed loudly. He was at practice and had a game tomorrow so I didn’t want to bother him or cloud his mind with meaningless things like what I need to talk about.

I couldn’t help to wallow in my own pity. The clock on my white painted walls doing nothing but making the sound of ticking throughout my room which eventually annoyed me enough to leave.

It was around the time for Ushi’s practice to be over and I really wanted him to come over, I just didn’t know how everything would go.

Whenever we had first started dating I got introduced, and interviewed, by Wakatoshi’s best friend, Tendou. And now, Tendou was one of my closest friends so I decided to call the Chocolatier himself for support.

After the phone had rang for three seconds it picked up, “Hello! Hello!” the familiar voice sounded throughout my kitchen.

“Hey Ten! I am in need of advice and company.” I admitted due to the facetime call revealing his apron on with some stains of colors on it.

“Oh really?” He asked, drawing out the ‘really’.

“Yes, really. I need to talk to Wakatoshi, I’m just not sure how. Any ideas?”

“That depends on what you’re going to talk to him about. Saying the wrong thing could make him easily misunderstand what you mean and vice versa.” Tendou tried to poetically explain, as if I didn’t already know that.

“Yeah, thank you so much,” I rolled my eyes, “I’m feeling a bit.. lonely in our relationship lately. I need more physical affection from him and I’m not sure how to really bring it up because times that’s happened before.”

That little spill from me made memories pop up into my head of Ushijima rejecting my attempts for physical love.

I could only remember how he shrugged himself away from holding my hand or kissing me after I brought him a well-balanced lunch meal one day during practice.

I never felt more embarrassed or ashamed in my life. My own boyfriend rejected my advances to give him, and to receive love from him in front of his entire team.

It wasn’t the only time that that had happened. I tried doing it behind closed doors just in case he didn’t like publicly displaying affection. However, that didn’t work either when he moved away from me one night after being out to dinner.

From that point on it’s just been messaging, very little facetime, some phone calls, and occasionally visiting each other’s apartment. I wasn’t sure how to proceed with this, and I certainly didn’t think it was anywhere near enough to breaking up.

However, that doesn’t mean he didn’t hurt my feelings nor have been continuing to hurt them. Whether on purpose or not.

With Ushijima being a member of the Schweiden Adlers, I knew some of his teammates and occasionally talked with them about how my boyfriend was doing time to time.

However, I couldn’t help to not reach out to them within the last couple of weeks. I didn’t have the courage to confidently ask about him.

Tendou’s voice brought me back to where I needed to be, which was having this conversation to communicate my needs across to him.

“And since knowing him for a while helps my understanding, I think a simple conversation would do the trick. Honestly, I’m not sure why you called if you knew that too?” He questioned me, eyes peering dangerously close to mine through the tiny phone screen.

I bit my lip, “It’s just… he has a game tomorrow. I don’t want to ruin that by spouting dumb nonsense about how I’m not feeling this or that from him.”

Growing up, I’ve always considered other peoples thoughts, opinions, feelings before mine. It was just the kind of person I was, and now it hurts me the most when I need to express myself.

“Girl. Fuck that game.” He rolled his eyes at me.

“Yes Wakatoshi loves his career and it’ll always be there but you’re something in his life that can disappear at any moment. I think he’d want to know,” Tendou tried reasoning with my dumb logic as he pointed a wooden spoon in my direction.

I gave up. I knew in the back of my mind that Tendou was definitely right and I wasn’t but it was my own self that was keeping me from doing what I needed to do.

“Alright, I think I’ll ask him to come over tonight then.” I tried to say confidently after I made up my mind of what needed to be done.

“Great! When I’m in Tokyo next I’ll be sure to bring a little something for you and him.” Tendou winked at me before ending the facetime call.

That only left me to do one thing, text my boyfriend. I quickly sent him a text asking if it would be okay for him to come over after practice.

My nerves were all over the place as I waited for the tall, olive haired man to show up at my place.

Soon the door bell brought me out of my mind trance and when I opened the door I saw the one and only Ushijima.

“Hey Toshi, come in,” I widened the door after taking a good look at him.

It seemed like he came here right out of practice, he was still in his whole practice uniform. His usual stoic face didn’t change once I sat down on to my living room couch.

“Is something the matter, (Y/n)?” He bluntly asked, getting straight to the point with me.

I took a deep breath to prepare myself, “Yes, Toshi. There is something the matter. My feelings are hurt and have been hurt for a while due to the lack of physical touch in our relationship.” I paused for a moment to look over his face.

He seemed to be intently listening on every word I was saying which gave me the impression to keep going.

“I just want more skin ship with you like hugging, kissing, hang holding, or even just sitting beside you with arms touching. I feel deprived of that because you seem to always move away when I try to initiate it. Is there a reason or..?” I trailed off, finishing what I was saying and asking a question to see his side.

“I’m sorry for making you feel that way, (Y/n). I don’t understand the idea of that. It makes you feel more loved than usual?” He asked, trying to work around in his head of what I had mentioned.

“Well, yes. Without it I feel upset or rejected by you sometimes.” I hung my head low a bit, it was embarrassing having to discuss this. However, I was always one to get embarrassed or ashamed at anything I needed.

“I will try, for you.” He promised, his large hand reaching over to me and placing it on my knee. He was very warm and it traveled through my body.

I smiled a bit, “Thank you, I really appreciate it. I’m sorry for not telling you sooner.”

I scooted closer to him on the couch and he gave me his one million dollar small smile that I love. His arms wrapped around my shoulders whilst I hugged his torso. His lean but built, very built, body touched my soft one, I loved this feeling.

We stayed like that for a minute, nothing heard but the low volume of my living room TV and our breathing.

“Thank you, Toshi. I really appreciate that you’ll try for me.” I pulled away, already missing the hug but needing to say that to his face.

“Of course, love.” His hand came up to caress my face and I leaned into his touch.

The aching in my heart and body went away after discussing that with him. It was all just a bit miscommunication which was easily fixed after I expressed what I needed to.

I couldn’t be more content.

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

a/n: I hope you enjoyed anon!! I’m terrible at writing for Ushijima but thank you for helping me extend the people I can write for :))

you all know my header rules, if not see pinned post!!

#kodzu writing #kodzu girl blogging #kodzu indulges! #kodzu fics #kodzu navigation #kodzu headers #ushijima x y/n #ushijima x you #ushijima fluff #hq ushijima #haikyuu ushijima #haikyuu ushiwaka #ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #hq wakatoshi #wakatoshi fluff #haikyuu wakatoshi #wakatoshi x reader #ushijima angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hq imagines #hq x you #hq fluff

[mavrintarou]

Lord Ushijima Wakatoshi [2 - end]

Thank you for all your patience with me. I hope you all are having a great start to the year, cheers to many more smut lol I have like two stories I didn't finish for the Daddies in December trope that I might still post them - I think there's still Itachi & Shisui (together) and Shikamaru.

Warning: angst, violence, fluff, smut, this is long because I didn't want to write a 3rd part

.

Y/n’s fingers tighten around the teacup as she brings it to her lips. Her favorite blend of tea she normally loved to drink on a rainy night tasted bitter yet bland to her tongue.

As she expected, there was nothing to sharpen on an already sharp sword. She set it along with the other swords for Maru’s father to deliver to the owner.

The rain poured heavily with thunder and lightning, the sky darker than usual.

Y/n’s intuition told her it was a sign.

She knew Captain, after serving several years beside him, she knew how he operated, how he hunted.

Dropping off his most prized possession, the sword, clearly indicated that he had tracked her down.

Why though?

Was he there to recruit her back into the Corps?

. .

The sword was sitting on the stand when she entered her sanctuary the following morning.

“Oh, you arrived early today,” Maru’s father greeted, “I forgot to tell you that the sword's owner requested you to deliver it to him. I hope you won’t be too busy this morning to do so.”

Y/n shook her head, “I can do that.” She approached the sword and reached for it, turning her heels to head towards the address scribbled on the note.

.

Y/n stared at the closed gates of the compound that had no listed clan name outside the wall.

She wonders if Wakatoshi is temporarily staying in this compound. It was much too large for one person.

Her knuckles come into contact with the gates, knocking softly.

“Coming,” a female voice calls from the other side.

The wooden door cracks open and an elderly woman smiles, “you must be Y/n-san?”

Y/n bowed, holding Wakatoshi’s sword outward, “I’ve come to return Lord Ushijima’s sword.”

“Oh, please come in, he is waiting for you.”

Y/n’s breath hitched, she knew she wouldn’t get away with just dropping his sword off without facing him. She followed quietly into the compound.

Her eyes bulge at the sight of the neat courtyard. The path they were walking on led them straight to the main house where she slid open a door, “my Lord will be with you shortly.” The door was slid closed after her.

In the middle of the room was a table with two cushions on each side. On the table were two tea cups and a tea kettle with freshly brewed tea.

Y/n took a seat on one side, setting the sword beside her, and waited patiently.

She zoned out before she heard a soft knock and the door slid open. She turned her head and her eyes widened as they connected with his.

Wakatoshi looked completely different. It was less than five times that she’d seen him wear something aside from his Corp uniform. In front of her stood a figure draped in a black kimono, with his bangs almost covering his eyes.

“Y/n,” he called softly. He entered the room and closed the door behind him, she watched as he took the spot across from her. His eyes never left hers.

Her heartbeat skipped but she kept her composure. “Captain.”

Wakatoshi shook his head, “I am no longer Captain.”

He explained everything that had happened after she left abruptly.

Y/n exhaled softly. She never thought he would ever resign, let alone leave the life he had known.

“What will you be doing now?” She asked, hand tightening on the sword in her hand. Her eyes widen, remembering it. Quickly, she lifts his sword to him, “here is your sword.”

He gently accepted it from her, setting it on the floor behind him. A soft smile graced his lips, “I have come a long way to find you..” He reached across the table, his thicker and longer fingers touching hers. “You left me without a word.”

Her fingers gently graze against his. Y/n remembers threading her fingers with his during their most intimate moments. She quickly withdrew her hand into her lap. “I don’t… I don’t understand why you would come this far to find me?”

Wakatoshi stared at her longingly before sighing, “I am here to take responsibility.” He raised his eyes to hers again, “I have wronged you and I want to make things right. All a person like me can offer you is owning up and taking responsibility for my actions.”

“Your actions?”

Wakatoshi frowned, not sure he understood the iciness in her tone. “Yes, my actions. I need to take responsibility for you, your body, and your dignity. Does that not please you?”

Y/n finally replied quietly after looking at a distance. “No, that does not please me. You owe me nothing, you do not need to take any responsibility. Please return.” She stood up and exited the room.

. .

Lord Ushijima did not return.

Y/n glared at him as he smiled politely as Maru’s father gave him a tour of the shop. “This is Y/n, you may have already met her as she is our sword sharpener. And over here is where you’ll be,” he continued to lead Wakatoshi down the corridors.

She would collaborate with Wakatoshi, who is tasked with crafting swords – a laborious and physically demanding responsibility.

Turning her heels, she shut the door to her sanctuary and began her day.

The shop closes for one hour at noon for lunch. Maru’s mother is in charge of making every day’s meal and everyone was to report to the dining room promptly.

Y/n glared with narrowed eyes as Wakatoshi occupied the seat to her right, a spot typically reserved for Maru. Maru, entering last, was surprised to find his usual seat taken. Nevertheless, he swiftly smiled and settled down on her left side.  

“Itadakimasu.” They all said in unison.

Y/n and Wakatoshi both reached for their chopsticks simultaneously, their elbows inadvertently colliding due to his left-handedness and her right-handedness.

“Oh!” Maru’s mother giggles, “Wakatoshi, why don’t you and Maru switch spots since you are a lefty?”

Maru was about to reach for his bowl and get up when Wakatoshi politely declined, “it is okay, I will eat with my right hand.”

They all watched him switch hands and began eating.

Y/n looked away, fixating on her bowl of rice, her thoughts drifting. Her mind remained preoccupied with the fact that Wakatoshi, her Captain, was in the same village and seated beside her.

She frowned when a piece of grilled salmon was placed on her rice, prompting her to turn and glance at the person to her right. Wakatoshi, however, continued eating as if it were not a significant matter.

.

Four weeks later, Wakatoshi proved to be an expert welder and demonstrated his mastery as a skilled welder. With his strength and knowledge, he has shaped a new distinctive style of swords that has attracted swordsmen from both nearby and distant villages, eager to explore and acquire blades crafted by Lord Ushijima, the famous Shiratorizawa Captain.  

It was more in demand that these blades were further perfected by the renowned artisan Y/n, known for her exceptional sharpening and refining skills.

One last one, she told herself, for the nth time. Each time, she would grab another sword without realizing it. She took pride in her work and products, and once she initiated the process, she was determined to persist, recognizing that halting would disrupt the momentum of sharpening a sword.  

It was one late evening when the shop had already closed down for the day, leaving her as the sole occupant. Typically, Maru would linger around to provide company, but after four failed attempts, he realized it was futile; as she was too engrossed in her work to engage in even a brief conversation with him.

Her hands came to a stop as her instincts were triggered, swiftly detecting the unfamiliar presence. The footsteps of at least six were too quiet and skilled.

Reaching underneath her table, she slowly pulled out the small knives she had hidden. As soon as she saw the shadow of one, with a flick of her wrists, aiming at the intruder.

In the blink of an eye, Y/n had another small katana at the throat of the intruder. “Move and I will slice your throat.” Pulling off the head covering, Y/n didn’t recognize the face. “Who are you and what business do you have breaking in?”

The man showed no fear except pain in his thigh which she had targeted.

She pressed the katana to his throat, breaking the skin. “Speak.” She looked at the others, there were six of them with covered faces. They all drew their swords, ready to attack.

Digging the knife in his thigh deeper, he cried out in anguish. She pushed the man forward, forcing the other men to retreat but kept their defense up.

They reached outside to the front of the shop where Y/n calculated how she would take them all down. “Are you their leader?” There was no response, and Y/n chuckled, “I’ll take your silence as a wish for your death.” She ripped the small knife out from his thigh, growling, “and guarantee that you shall never raise a sword again!” With swift and precise motion, the knife severed crucial ligaments.  

The five men charged at her as she kicked the man in her hold down but before she could draw the sword she had strapped behind her back she was surprised with the sudden appearance of seven other men she was familiar with.

Her old team.

With each of the five intruders apprehended by Reon, Satori, Eita, Tsutomu, and Yu. Kenjiro and Wakatoshi stepped out from the shadows.

The stern, icy expression on his face was the same one she remembered.

.

The intense silent gaze from Y/n unsettled all the men present, except for Wakatoshi, who remained completely unperturbed by her piercing stare.

They all sat before her in her small home after they apprehended the men who broke into the shop. Wakatoshi handed them off to the authorities who had been searching for these highly skilled bandits.

Maru and his family came on-site, devastated at the news their shop had been broken into. Thankfully it was minor interior damage and was something they could fix up easily within a few days.

“What are you all doing here?” Y/n finally asked.

Every face in the room turned to look at Wakatoshi, waiting for him to answer.

“They have also relocated as well.”

Y/n inhaled deeply, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I’m sure you guys are not stationed here?” They had no business in this town.

“We’ve all resigned as well,” Reon answered, “and followed Captain here to find you.” He smiles softly at her, “we missed you Y/n.”

Any frustration within her bones faded, Y/n couldn’t stay mad even if she pretended to. “I missed you all too.” She stepped forward and gave each of them a hug.

After all, this was her team for many years.

.

Everyone but Wakatoshi left, he remained, leaning against the wall.

Y/n glanced at him and then at the gates to her compound, she raised a brow at him. “It is late…”

It was past midnight, she had too much catching up with her teammate, losing track of time in the process.

“Can I have a word with you?” Wakatoshi approached her and stopped until he stood in front of her. He was always aware of their height difference, but he never realized how much smaller she was to him.

His breath hitched as his lower region tightened and memories reminded him how she felt when she came around his thick cock.

“Are you… okay?” She reached up to cup his suddenly flushed cheeks.

In an instant, she recognized her actions and pulled back her hand, but Wakatoshi was quicker. He caught her and held her hand, pressing her small palm against his cheek, feeling the stubble on his unshaven chin and cheeks from the past day.

He leaned into her touch and closed his eyes, a soft sigh escaped his lip as he felt recharged instantly.

“Y/n,” Wakatoshi groan in half pain and half frustration, “I’m – I’m no good at this…” He opened his eyes, they burned with dark desire, gazing deeply into hers. “I’m learning and I’m good with anything I put my heart and mind into but this, I’m no good with love. I’ve never loved before so I don’t know how to, or what to do. I don’t know – I don’t know how to make you love me like how I love you.”

“What?” it barely came out as a whisper.

“All my life, I had no trouble accomplishing anything I put my heart and mind to but showing you how I feel about you has been the one damn hardest thing I am struggling with.” He closed the remaining distance between them. He reached to cup her face with his large palm, “I don’t know how to express my love to you with words, I’ve never been good with words.” Wakatoshi’s eyes darkened, “I didn’t realize how pathetic I have been showing you with my body… with our bodies.” He looked away, embarrassed.

It did not dawn on him until he sought guidance from Reon and Satori. They scold him for his lack of knowledge with a woman.

“Do you think taking her to your chambers almost every time is going to show her that you care for her?” Satori gasped after hearing his Captain’s explain their history. “She probably thinks you were just using her for her body for your pleasure.”

Wakatoshi gasped lightly, the thought never crossed his mind. That was never his intention. He began seeing his actions from a different perspective and groaned painfully as he felt like a complete thoughtless being. Now he understood her reactions and words.

He kept digging himself into a deeper hole each time.

“Apologize to her, clarify to her what you truly meant because I’m pretty sure, she is thinking that you were only using her body all this time.” Satori had more experience with women than the others on the team. “She probably thinks you didn’t care about the baby either.”

“That’s not true!” Wakatoshi roared, “I may not have known but it didn’t mean I wasn’t devastated… when I wrapped my head around it… it was already too late.” His shoulders dropped, “Y/n lost our baby and I was losing her…” he paused, “and at this point, I lost her.”

“It took me losing you to recognize my feelings for you,” he swallows, “I have loved you for a long time, just never realized it. You had always been by my side for many years but when that changed, I am nothing without you when you are not beside me.” Wakatoshi pressed his lips to the crown of her head before gazing down at her with soft eyes once again, “please forgive me for my lack of knowledge and past actions. I want to do better, I want to be better for you.”

Y/n’s eyes filled with tears before she surprised him, throwing her arms around him and burying her face against his broad chest.

All the tension he felt expelled out of his body the moment her arms wrapped around his waist. He let out a soft sigh and wrapped his arms around her.

Y/n pulled away to look up at him, “I have been in love with you for many years too but I was too afraid of my feelings because I never felt them before and I didn’t want to risk ruining our friendship we had…” A tear slips from the corner of her eye, “I too want to do better, be better for you too.”

.

Y/n blinks away sleep, her eyes adjusting to the scene in front of her. A frown appears on her face before the memories resurface – a few hours ago, she reunited with Wakatoshi. She can’t recall the details of how they ended up in her chamber, but after a long and eventful day, they drifted off to sleep, embracing each other.

His facial features were relaxed and soft making him look younger.

While awake, Wakatoshi consistently wore a single expression. Only a select few, those close to him, had witnessed him smile or laugh. However, Y/n was the sole person who had glimpsed everything he had concealed within.

Y/n, typically unselfish, couldn’t suppress a sense of greed and delight at being the only one who had seen the handful of expressions displayed by Wakatoshi.

A lewd memory of Wakatoshi’s grimace expression came to mind when he came inside her. His mouth hung open, eyes tightly closed, and breath coming in pants.

As if he sensed her impure thoughts about him, Wakatoshi’s eyes opened, staring right into hers.

Y/n quickly turned her head, cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

His strong arms tightened around her, bringing her even closer to him. His nose pressed into her neck as he pressed a kiss against the skin. “Why are you shy now?”

Y/n squirms in his arms, turning her back towards him. “N – nothing…”

A low hum vibrates from his throat before he rolls above her, careful of his weight on her. He reached and gripped her chin gently, forcing her to look at him. With a better view of her face, he smiles warmly. “Morning, my love.” It was all still new to him, but expressing his love for her was all coming naturally to him. “I hope you slept as well as I did.” He leans down and presses his lips against hers in a gentle kiss.

She couldn’t recall the last time she experienced such blissful sleep, enveloped and protected by the embrace of the one she loved.

Y/n’s hands that were trapped between their bodies wiggled their way to cup his face, bringing him in for a deeper and more passionate kiss.

Y/n knew she was in love with him after their first night. She was in love with him prior but always kept her feelings at bay, thinking they were comrades and love would only ruin the bond they shared.

Now that she could kiss him with her whole heart…

“Y/n!”

Their kiss broke abruptly as they both stared at the closed chamber door.

“Y/n! Are you home?”

.

“Thank you,” Y/n smiles, closing the gate. She let out a sigh of relief, it was her neighbor coming to check on her after the incident.

“Are you hurt at all?” The elderly lady asked with worry.

Y/n confirmed she was fine, assuring her kind and sweet neighbor she was free of harm.

Y/n quickly hurried inside her home where she found Wakatoshi waiting, leaning against the door frame.

His yukata bunched at his waist leaving his upper body bare.

Y/n’s eyes followed southwards… to the tent at his crotch.

A few minutes ago she had quickly tried to shove him off but the attempt was futile as Wakatoshi refused to budge.

“It’s fine, she’ll get the idea you might not be home if you don’t respond,” he leaned down to kiss her again but she dodged it, his lips pressing against her jaw.

Y/n almost giggled at this new side of him.

Whoever was at her gates was persistent, shouting her name.

Y/n continue to squirm, now smacking his shoulder to get off of her. “It is my neighbor, she’s probably worried!”

Groaning, Wakatoshi rolled off and watched in annoyance as Y/n hurried off to greet the unwelcome guest.

She left him in a state of discomfort.

“Come here,” he ordered softly.

Y/n fought the urge to smile, staying in her current position with hands clasped over her stomach. She shook her head, biting down on her lower lip.

Wakatoshi’s lips curved into a smile as he launched for her.

But Y/n was faster, running in the opposite direction.

“Y/n!”

After five minutes of cat and mouse chasing, Wakatoshi wrapped his long arms around her, enveloping her in a tight bear hug.

“Got you,” he murmured lowly, inhaling her addicting scent. “No more,” he whispers, “no more running from me, please.”

Turning around in his arms, Y/n snaked her hand to the back of his head, bringing it close to hers. “No more, I won’t run from you anymore.”

The contrast of their height and physique was remarkable, yet Wakatoshi didn’t mind it one bit.

She is lifted off the wooden floors, her legs wrapping around his waist, ankles locking.

“Good,” he carries her to her chamber. His eyes remained connected to hers, “you’re the most beautiful woman in my world.”

Y/n tightens her legs around his waist pressing herself against his cock.

He winced, eyes shutting and inhaling sharply. “You…” he opens his eyes, his pupils dilated. “I don’t want to hurt you…”

Her lips near his as she whispers, “you won’t, I know you won’t hurt me.”

He adjusts her weight in his arms, shifting her higher so he can look up to her. “Kiss me.”

Smiling broadly, she leaned down and pressed her lips softly against his.

Wakatoshi maneuvered her in his arms and laid her gently on the futon. His mouth continued to move hungrily over hers. His fingers found the knot that held her yukata together and pulled it loose. His palms slipped inside, pushing away the materials that covered her beautiful body.

“Ahh,” Y/n moaned when his palm groped her bosom. Her nipples immediately harden, perfect for his fingers to tweak. She watched as he took a nipple into his hot mouth. Her fingers threaded through his dark thick hair as she moaned his name.

He glanced up, releasing her nipple.

Y/n softly strokes his face, “Wakatoshi, make love to me.”

His lips formed a gentle smile, turning to kiss her palm. “As you wish, my love.”

Wakatoshi straightens and pushes off the only remaining piece of clothing on him. His cock sprang against his abdomen, long and thick. He reaches for Y/n’s hands and pulls her up against him before wrapping his arm around her back.

He kept his hot gaze on her while pushing her yukata off, discarding it aside. He adjusts her, having her kneel over his lap. His fingers seek in between her thighs, grazing her moistened lips before dipping a finger past her folds.

Wakatoshi presses his lips against her clavicle and nips the skin, “you’re so wet.”

Y/n hums, unknowingly rocking against his finger. She gasped when he added not one, but two fingers inside her drenched pussy.

“Are you ready?”

“Yes,” she breathed, “I’m always ready for you.”

Wakatoshi chuckled, heart fluttering around her words. His fingers are quickly replaced with this cock as he brings her hips slowly down onto his cock.

Y/n wraps her arms around his neck, hugging him close. Her breath shook as she feels her body split trying to accommodate his cock. “You’re – you’re so big…”

He rubs her lower back, cooing soothing words. “Relax, my love, you just forgot but you’ve taken me before… many times before… remember?”

Her hips bounced lightly and little by little, she was able to take more of him until he was fully embedded inside her. Looking between their bodies, she gasped lightly as her belly bulged slightly.

Wakatoshi kissed her cheek, whispering, “I’ll make sure you won’t ever forget…” His hands slipped beneath her bottom and began bouncing her on his cock.

Slapping skin on skin echoed throughout the room with her moans and his grunts.

Wakatoshi groaned against her neck before he pushed her down on her back and shifted above her to continue pounding deeply. His massive sacks thump repeatedly against her bottom, sparking her near orgasm.

“Toshi…” Y/n moaned, tenderly staring into his eyes, “cum inside me… cum inside me, my love…”

Lost with words, Wakatoshi fasten his hips, hammering his thick cock until he was quivering in a release as he stuffed her pussy full of his cum.

“My love…” he whispered repeatedly. He towers over Y/n and presses his lips to her forehead, nose, and lips. “I love you… you are my world.” The heavenly smile she gave him was all he needed for the rest of his life.

“I love you too.”

He swallowed the lump in his throat, “I put my seed inside you…”

Y/n giggles, “I know…”

The corner of his lips itch to smile, “will you have my child again?” He sees the pain in her eyes and he chews on his lower lip before speaking again, “we will always remember the child we lost. This time, I will be there for you, every step of the way.”

.

Their shop resumed four days later. Wakatoshi and Y/n appeared at the shop hand in hand.

“Oh my,” Maru’s mother whispered, hands pressed together. Her shocked look immediately softened as she smiled, “we will still be a family, right?”

“If it will be all right with you all,” Y/n answers softly, looking at Maru’s mother and father and then lastly at Maru. His eyes were still staring at Y/n and Wakatoshi’s tightly intertwined fingers.

Maru sighed softly before smiling, yet his eyes revealed a sense of disappointment. “I knew you had someone else in your heart.” He looks up at Wakatoshi and with a firm tone, “promise me you will take good care of her.”

“I promise,” Wakatoshi replied, casting a warm look at Y/n.

. .

[Six months later]

Y/n wipes the sweat and dirt off her husband’s forehead as he finishes polishing the last sword of the day.

With the guidance and teaching of Y/n, he has learned the art and skill of sword sharpening. He has taken over her role for the time being.

After discovering she was with child, Y/n could not win against Wakatoshi, and Chigaya family members. She was forbidden to even sharpen a sword, let alone lift one.

“Well done,” Y/n murmurs sweetly, handing him the casing.

She was proud of her husband, who quickly became renowned as a sword sharpener.

With his focus off of work for the day, he turned his attention to his wife, pulling her into the space between his legs. He presses a kiss to her pregnant belly, “did you take your afternoon nap yet?”

“Yes, we did. I feel refreshed now.”

“My baby isn’t giving you a hard time, are they?” Wakatoshi has been nervous about this pregnancy, taking extra precautions. He even had Kenjiro moved next door for the time being to be closer in case of emergency.

Maru’s mother had reassured Wakatoshi that the minor issues Y/n was facing during pregnancy were entirely normal. However, when she mentioned that Y/n appeared quite significant, Wakatoshi couldn’t help but feel uneasy.

“It’s likely because you, my Lord, are substantial,” she reassured, with a laugh, “I believe your baby is inheriting their size from their father.”

That didn’t ease Wakatoshi’s concerns. He worried that if his wife was indeed carrying a large baby, it might pose challenges during childbirth, considering her petite stature.

“It is alright, my love,” Y/n consoles, “my body will adapt, and everything will be fine.”

Wakatoshi exhaled softly, “I love you too much, I don’t want you hurting.”

“It is worth it,” she smiles, rubbing her belly.

. . .

E/n: You all know... it's our baby boy Suna's bday coming up... stay tuned lol

>>> @queenelleee @mfreedomstuff @erintaro @callmeraider @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wolffmaiden @cloud-lyy @chrisrue15

#haikyuu smut #haikyu x reader #haikyuu ushijima wakatoshi #haikyuu lords #ushijima wakatoshi smut #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x y/n #ushijima wakatoshi fluff #ushijima wakatoshi angst #ushijima smut #ushijima angst

[hiraethwa]

one summer day

05 saturn i. where ushijima finds you outside your house

<< 04 new dawn. | >> 06 saturn ii. | << the collection >>

pairing: ushijima wakatoshi x reader a/n: sorry for the late post, life has been hectic lately. enjoy the angst! inbox me if you want to be tagged - ave word count: 1.7k warnings: angst, childhood trauma, parental neglect/verbal abuse, past death of a family member song: saturn by sleeping at last

april, second year

you taught me the courage of stars before you left how light carries on endlessly, even after death with shortness of breath you explained the infinite and how rare and beautiful it is to even exist

ushijima is full on sprinting to your house. feet slamming on the pavements, heart thundering out of his chest. how had he not known? 

he remembers the words you uttered to him last year, seemingly random. but you had phased out when he asked you about it, lost in your own thoughts. and you had seemed so genuinely disturbed that he decided not to pursue the topic, letting it go. 

“my little sister was a cat whisperer too.”

even earlier today. you had been so out of it, missing the conversation that you were in, when normally you would be listening intently. when you were always listening, even when you were pretending not to hear the stupid things they talk about. 

he had patted your hair, checking to see if you were alright, and you gave him the same smile as always. others may be fooled by you, but he knew something was amiss. he had brushed it off, even though his gut told him something was not right, thinking you may have been tired from adjusting to waking up early for school again.

and you had been so quiet tonight when he walked you home. once again lost in your own thoughts, seemingly not noticing the orange cat that the two of you would stop and pet whenever he walked you home. he had stopped to give the cat a little treat before noticing that you had continued on, leaving him behind. as if your body was there, but your mind was not. like a ghost of yourself.

“how is she?” semi had asked ushijima when he returned to the dorms, bringing your homework that was left behind in semi’s room. that is new. semi never asked that question before when he walked you home in the past. 

you, with your smile that shined like a gem but you rarely showed people, only those closest to you. you, with your radiant kindness that stayed always like a quiet strength, even to those you were not familiar with. you, with your quiet caring, always making sure no one is left behind. you, with your warmth that didn’t expect anything in return. 

to him, you were the moon with many faces. not always seen, but always present. somehow, you two shared a bond that communicated with action more than words. two quiet people who preferred to do rather than say. to keep things to yourselves rather than burden those around you.

ushijima had known that you were independent to a certain fault, but not like this. 

his fists clench of their own accord, mirroring the feeling in his heart. did you felt alone? he could not imagine the pain that you were going through right now, alone in your empty house. how had he not known?

semi’s words replay in his head. “miyamura-senpai asked me to keep an eye on her before he left for college. today is the anniversary of their youngest sister’s death.”

“my little sister was a cat whisperer too.” was. was. was. 

he knew he could not have guessed that, rationally speaking. but if he had paid more attention, looked between the lines, perhaps he would have known sooner. 

he should have more than enough stamina to run to your house and back to shiratorizawa round trip easily, but he finds himself out of breath as he rounds the corner to your house. the windows were dark, as if all the light had been snuffed out. something in him sinks. his heart? he isn’t sure. 

“miyamura!” he bangs on your front door, hoping you weren’t asleep. if he had looked, he would have seen you squatting under the miyamura hyousatsu on the gatepost. 

“ushijima?” your voice calls out weakly from behind him. he whirls around sharply.

“miya–” he wants to scold you for being so stubborn. for not relying on your friends. you did not have to shoulder this grief alone, if he could help it. not now, not ever again. 

but he stops himself. because in the darkness of the night, illuminated by the streetlamps, you look so small. so defeated. like you had been carrying around all this grief with you your entire life that your shoulders sagged with the weight. that you were never given the permission to bloom. you had always reminded him of spring, but he didn’t know. 

he drops his bag to the ground, homework forgotten. 

“what are you doing here–” your words are cut off mid-sentence as his feet moves towards you without thinking, arms wrapping around your shoulder tightly and engulfing you in a hug. i am here. 

his head sits atop yours, almost a perfect puzzle. then he drops his head next to yours, hand cupping the back of your head as he holds onto you tightly. “y/n.” 

he’s never said your name out loud before. it was always miyamura, or miyamura-san. so when it comes out of his mouth, a dam breaks in you. tears come uncontrollably as you fist his clothes in your hands, trying to hold on, when all you were doing is spiraling. 

you sob. crying out loud. all that raging grief that was somehow miraculously locked away in you comes pouring out. your voice comes out broken and ugly as your chest heaves up and down violently. your pained wails of grief and loss a jumbled incoherent mess. 

ushijima stays with you like that for what felt like forever, as your pain breaks his heart over and over again, but all he could do was hold you and remind you that you are not alone, repeating the three little words over and over. “i am here.” 

when your sobs quiet down, and your breaths slow steadily with your hiccups, he pulls away to look at you. or at least, he tries to. your arms are locked tight around him, as if he would disappear the second you loosen your grip. 

“y/n, i am not leaving you.” you grip stays constant, and then slowly, after a while, it loosens around him, but does not fall away. it looks like you are intent on not letting go of him. “c’mon.”

he leads you into your house awkwardly, shuffling around with you still locked onto him, turning on the lights as he goes, knowing the place like the back of his hand from how often they come over when your parents are away for work.

“i’m making you tea.” you reluctantly release him from your arms as he sets a kettle of water to boil, but keep a hand on his shirt for good measure. 

ushijima picks out sencha from the variety of green teas you stocked for him after noticing that he had been bringing his own supply of tea to your study sessions. he brews the tea in a teapot, carefully proportioning out the amount of leaves. and in your cute cat painted cup, he fills it halfway, gently blowing on the hot liquid before handing it to you. 

you keep silent, sipping at the tea. he doesn’t mind, ushijima thinks. you were both on the quieter side. he likes to think that friendships are not defined by how much in common that two people have, or how much they can talk about, but rather the comfort in the silence that falls when the conversation stops. 

“can i stay the night?” it’s not that he doesn’t trust you to leave you alone. he doesn’t want to leave you by yourself, and from the way you are holding onto him, he thinks that you don’t want to be there by yourself either. he doesn’t want to think about what could have happened if he didn’t come back. if you hadn’t forgotten your homework in semi’s room. if semi hadn’t told him.

you nod, gratitude shining in your swollen eyes, long dried from how much you had cried. with the hand that is still on his shirt, you tug at him to follow you up the stairs. 

he realizes you mean for him to sleep in your room as you wordlessly roll out the futon that he carried from the guest room next to your bed. you show him to the bathroom for him to change out of his wet tear-stained clothes and hand over the set of clean clothes that you retrieved from your brother’s room.

you seem adamant on holding on to him by the edge of his shirt as he walks into the bathroom, almost like you would stay there as he undresses. but then, reluctantly, you let go of the small corner of the fabric that you had a deathly grip on and shuts the door. 

when ushijima walks out, he finds you in the same spot he left you in. your breathing is slightly labored, hands fidgeting on your sides. he reaches for your hand, relinquishing the bottom corner of his clean shirt to you. you seem to settle down with that gesture, content with his presence. 

he tucks you into bed, sitting next to you while regaling you with a tale of stars that were infinite.  your grip on his shirt remains until you fall asleep, the crease between your eyebrows finally easing. at that moment in time, you look so peaceful in your sleep that he could have been fooled. the quiet one who is always taking care of her friends, never expecting anything in return. now he knows the storm that brews under your skin.

a sudden wave of exhaustion hits him then, as he covers your hand with the blanket and crawls into the futon, falling asleep almost immediately.

when he wakes up the next morning, he finds you curled up next to him, hair mussed from sleep, your hand in his, fingers interlocked perfectly. 

in the days afterward, life carries on as usual. you pretend like that night didn’t happen, so ushijima follows suit. he can be patient. but he sees the cracks in the mask you don ever so clearly, stars shining through them. and he wonders, what happened to you in that house? 

more and more, he notices the tenseness in your spine, the invisible weight on your shoulders. the look in your eyes that feels far older than it should be. and he feels this urge in him to wrap his arms around you and protect you from all the hurt that the world has caused you. 

and then one day, when he finds himself alone with you, he blurts out the words he has been thinking about. 

“you don’t have to be the person in your house with me.”

reblogs and comments are appreciated!

#one summer day #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x you #ushijima wakatoshi x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima x reader #ushijima x you #ushijima x y/n #ushijima fluff #ushijima angst #ushijima wakatoshi fluff #ushijima wakatoshi angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #semi eita #shiratorizawa #wakatoshi x reader #hq wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi haikyuu #haikyuu wakatoshi #ushijima x reader fluff #ushijima x reader angst

[riddlesweater]

A glimpse of us

Wakatoshi Ushijima x reader

Warnings: child loss, pregnancy, death, thoughts of suicide, depression

Summary: he finally lost everything

Once the accident happened, Toshi distanced himself from everyone—his family, his friends, and his teammates. All he did was lie in bed and cry, day and night. His teammates spammed his phone with messages, unanswered phone calls, and voicemails. His friends and teammates would knock on his front door, but he couldn’t get out of bed to answer. News would flood his television and phone. ‘Where is this athlete now?’ the articles would say something like that.

Why couldn’t it be me? He asked himself all over. He thinks he should be better off by killing himself. He lost everything he ever cared about—his sunshine, his happiness. It was gone, all of it. He missed your beautiful smile, which he would wake up to. Your smile made everything light up; he didn’t care what mattered when looking at you. He loves you so much. He loved you so much. He was so happy that one month before the accident, you had hosted a gender reveal party. Everyone guessed it was going to be a girl. Toshi would have been such a good girl, dad. When the blue powder shot out, everyone was in shock. Everyone knows Toshi is going to be a great dad. You both cried in tears of joy; you both were so happy. You were going to have a little boy. A mini-Toshi is walking around.

Toshi hated getting up in the middle of the night because he would have to drive to the supermarket. He preferred getting up, even if it meant he had practice early in the morning. He didn’t want you going anywhere alone; he was way too protective after he found out you were pregnant. He wanted nothing bad to ever happen, but it did. You’re dead. He offered to get another job, but you insisted it was fine that you worked. Until that night. When he heard the news of your body being found dead in the crashed car,hee had no idea what to do. He thought it was just a cruel joke, but it wasn’t until the funeral was hosted a week later. A car crashed into the driver’s side, killing both you and your son.

He sat in the room, crying his eyes out as he looked at the engagement ring. He was going to propose to you that night. He had gotten reservations at a fancy restaurant that happened to open a month before. He was sitting in the seat waiting for you; he was dressed all nice. He told the waiter to wait a couple of minutes because you were almost there. It was your 5th anniversary, and he was so happy. He was going to have a baby with the love of his life, but it didn’t work out.He sat there looking at it some more, put the ring on the table, and walked out, closing the empty room and the nursery’s door one last time.

#haikyuu #haikyu x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x reader #angst #ushijima smut #wakatoshi x reader #haikyuu wakatoshi #hinata hyuga #oikawa tooru #anime #haikyuu smut #anime smut #anime angst

[ilylovelyz]

papa!ushijima who just very much falls in love with his daughter.

ushijima never really was much of a family man, his own parents being divorced and having no siblings growing up.

he didn't even really want kids, but you ended up pregnant anyways. it's not like he was against it, but it's also not like he also planned for it either.

so he was really just 50/50 in all honesty.

but you seemed to want a baby, so he went along with it for your sake. not like he would want to force you to go for an abortion either, he'd never force you to do such a thing.

he went along with the whole thing, not really wanting a specific gender, nor did he really care about the baby's name.

but for "your" sake, he would find himself ordering books and information about babies and childbirth, looking up baby names on his phone and asking for parental advice.

he felt a strange feeling inside of him when days passed and your baby bump grew.

it made him feel "fuzzy", that's the best and only way he could describe it.

it's love at first sight when she's born.

he doesn't know what took over him, but he just felt so.. at peace when he first held her. she was so small within his arms, so helpless and dependent on him.

the moment she revealed her dainty hazel eyes, similar to her father's, he just felt the air get sucked right out of him.

she was just so precious and warm, small and dainty.

the baby scared him at first, because he didn't know what to do with it.

it took awhile, but he eventually was learn the smallest of details about her, mindful even though she probably didn't even know about her own existence.

you slept soundly at night, every night, occasionally waking up when you felt you slept for too long, walking into the nursery only to find ushijima in the rocking chair asleep with the baby snuggled against his chest.

he would find his eyebrows furrowing when he realized a year had passed in a flash, much against his will.

suddenly, his babygirl is walking, and babbling little incoherent words along the lines of "papa!" or "mama!"

he followed her around like a worried dog watching their owner, following wherever her little curiosity led her.

he hated seeing her cry.

his chest would tighten up whenever she would reach for him with a runny nose, fat tears running down her soft cheeks because one of her favorite toys broke.

she's lucky her father is a top-star athlete who doesn't bat an eye when he's spending almost 500$ on toys.

he gets a little dumbfounded when she chooses a remote as one of her favorite toys though, over a 500$ toy.

but nevertheless, as she got older, her walk become a little more faster and had more distance away from him than he preferred.

he'd watch from a distance, the corner of his lips upturned into a soft smile at the way his daughter attempts her first spike.

so prideful that he's created something so amazing and special.

#haikyuu pregnant #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu #haikyuu angst #haikyū!! #haikyuu smut #haikyu smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! smut #haikyu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu texts #ushijima x reader #hq ushijima #ushijima fluff #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima x you #ushijima headcanons #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima imagine #ushijima x reader smut #⨳ family dream

[mangogobibiboo]

Adlers Lost and Found

Warnings: children, lost children, screaming, kinda angst, not really, very fluff. Let me know if there are more!

ADLERS x FEM!reader

MSBY ver.

Leave a comment or a reblog. They are always very appreciated 💕

Ushijima:

Ayumu: Age 6

Hiro: Age 5

Fate must hate Ushijima because though his boys were a blessing to him, they both had personalities that were polar opposite from his.

When he was little, he often drew in his little coloring book and maybe played outside with his dad. 

But his sons seem to have more fun throwing the crayons at each other or using them to draw on each other or the wall.

It was the coach's 90th birthday, and he and his wife had invited over some of the old Shiratorizawa players to celebrate

Ushijima had just returned from Poland, and this would have been a great opportunity to see everyone again.

Ayumu and Hiro were so excited to go. They were city boys. They lived their whole lives in Tokyo, aside from the winter trips to Miyagi and the summer trip to California; they never really got out of the confines of their high-rise penthouse much. 

This was going to be an adventure for them. When the boys visit their grandmother, they usually have to stay in the house or play in the courtyard because it's so cold, but they still love visiting. 

And their grandpa lives in the city, so while it's also really fun, it feels like Tokyo.

You guys had arrived at the coach's house, and for the most part, things were going very well. The boys were calm, and Ushijima was having a great time with his old teammates.

Near dinner time, you decided to go in and help Tendou with dinner in the kitchen. Ushi only got distracted for a bit, but that was long enough because when Ushi turned his attention back to check on the boys playing. They were gone.

To be completely honest, Ushijima was not freaking out because, like a rational human, he knew they could have gone far, and if he just went into the woods a little bit, he would probably find them.

It didn't cross his mind that he should tell you the boys were gone, so he went in to find them without telling anyone.

The sun was lowering in the sky, but he finally stumbled onto them a few meters into the wood. They were covered in mud, and Ayumu was pushing his brother into the pond, yelling, "Walk the plank!!"

Ushi stood there and watched them playing pretend because, honestly, sometimes, their chaos was cute. 

But then, just as Hiro was about to jump into the water, he remembered that Hiro can't swim.

Without much thought, he dove into the pond to save his little boy.

They trudged back to the house, muddy and soaking wet. Ayumu was on his back while Hiro was in his arms.

By the time they returned, everyone was standing outside worrying because the sun had set at least an hour ago, and they hadn't come in for dinner.

You wanted to be mad when you heard what happened, but they looked so funny you forgot your anger.

Kageyama:

Ren: Age 3

Ren was so much like his father. It was scary. Little Ren was not only a carbon copy of his father with the same raven hair and blueberry eyes, but he had his personality to boot.

It pissed you off a little. I mean, you held that little boy inside of you for nine months. Would it have killed him to be a little like you?

He could go an entire day just playing in his playpen, only going to find you or his dad when he was sleepy or hungry.

That day was the first day Kageyama would take care of Ren alone since returning from Italy.

It was a blessing to Kageyama that Ren was such a low-maintenance kid because all he had to do was feed him, keep him clean, and keep him alive.

It was just past two, and the boys had just finished lunch—a bowl of Udon for Kageyama and some pieces of Tonkatsu Ren. And with their stomachs full, sleep started to set in.

The boys curled up on the sofa. Ren rested his head on his dad's chest and snuggled into it, ready to nap. 

Kageyama pulled a blanket on them and gave in to sleep himself. 

He had only planned on sleeping for 30 minutes tops. But by the time he woke, the sunlight that filtered into the room was replaced with moonlight. 

The clock above the TV read 7:00 pm. It was dinner time now, and Ren was gone.

Wait...Ren was...GONE.

This man shot up from the couch so fast. He actually tripped over the blanket, but he couldn't care less. He was frantically running through the house, calling Ren's name.

Nothing in the house looked out of place, so his mind went to the worst possible scenario: he either ran away or was kidnapped.

Was there a reason a three-year-old would run away from the father he cried for an entire year to see? No. Was there a way that anyone could get past the top-tier security system in the house to take his son without triggering the loud ass alarm and alerting every police officer in Tokyo? No. But was Kageyama thinking rationally? Also no.

Unlike the others, Kageyama just straight-up called you in his panic and told you what happened.

So you calmed him down, assuring him that Ren was still in the house, and told him to check the playpen. Ren had a favorite nap spot in the corner of the pen where it stashed a bunch of pillows and blankets and his volleyball plushy.

Thank god because when Kageyama finally saw his little boy cuddle up in those blankets in the corner, he felt his heart relax.

Hoshiumi:

Misa: Age 9

If I'm honest, he is the one that got lost, but he will never admit that. 

And even before this, Hoshiumi had lost Misa plenty of times, but he would never admit that either.

Misa already knew the drill: if she "got lost." Just wait until your father realizes you're gone and for him to return and "find" you.

Misa was definitely less impulsive than her father, but nonetheless, she was an absolute daddy girl. Whenever Hoshiumi had time off, she was stuck to him like glue. 

This led to him planning many father-daughter days while you were off at work.

That day, he decided they would go to the arcade; it had been years since he went, and Misa was finally old enough to enjoy it.

At first, they started on the kitty games like wack a mole, fishing, etc. Those were good warm-ups, but just like her father, Misa was ambitious and wouldn't let her age get in the way of having fun on the more challenging games.

But before that, they had to eat lunch. After all, you can't dominate the virtual world on an empty stomach.

The first game those two set their eyes on afterward was a shooting game called "Last Man Standing."

It was basically laser tag, and the winner would get their choice of anything in the prize booth and 50% off all purchasable items.

The game started with them playing together and having fun, but as Hoshi got into the game, he began leaving Misa behind to reach the target.

He did end up winning, but he completely lost sight of where his daughter was in the process.

He basically begged the arcade workers to shut down the place to find his little girl.

It didn't take long because as soon as they shut down the game and turned the lights on in the room. Misa was sitting in the corner, playing with her fingers.

He bought her anything and everything she wanted from the prize booth to compensate for what happened.

He usually did this every time she "got lost." Like when he lost her in the supermarket, they came home with 12 chocolate bars and a bunch of sugary cereal but none of the vegetables you had sent them out for.

When you got home, Misa was curled up in her bed surrounded by stuffed animals and unopened chocolate.

"You lost her again, didn't you?"

"No.........."

"Uh-hmm"

"It's true!"

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyu oc #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu hcs #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu kids #haikyū!! #haikyu fanart #haikyuu angst #haukyuu fluff #haikyuu kageyama #haikyuu hoshiumi #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x reader #ushijima headcanons #ushijima fluff #kageyama tobio #kageyama x reader #kageyama headcanons #kageyama drabbles #kageyama fluff #hoshiumi x reader

[toshigimmemilk]

based on this one reddit post I found, if I come across it again ill link it

wakatoshi’s been hiding a secret from you. a pretty big one actually but he’s doing it all for you especially with you having to get right back to work after a couple of months of giving birth, and he'd seen how much distress it had caused you to be away from your little baby girl after your maternal leave was done, how much time you spent with your baby as soon as you came home, sometimes even pushing toshi out of the way to get to your baby he's mad cuz he didn't get his kiss (he's the actual babie) but he's been keeping secrets.

wakatoshi has never been good with secrets, he'd always told you whatever was going on in his mind, no matter how crazy it might seem, he didn't like keeping secrets from you,

but

he saw how tired you looked when you came home today, complaining as soon as you entered about a deal that you had to close before the other side pulled out and with a quick kiss to his lips, you made way to where your baby is, cooing slightly and the tired feeling of the day already washing out of you as soon as you set your eyes on them pulling themselves up right beside the couch and then all of a sudden,

your baby walked. sure she struggled a bit, stumbling and bouncing but yet, she walked for the first time. gasping with wide eyes you reach your hands out, encouraging them to walk a bit more towards you, you called out to wakatoshi with a quick toshi come look at her!!, and there he was standing beside where you're sitting, encouraging your bundle of joy to walk towards you both, which she did bit by bit and you suddenly felt your heart flutter and tears gather at your lash line and with a few steps there she was in all her glory, bouncing up and down and giggling with her tiny two-toothy grin at you both, with tears you picked her up and turned to look at wakatoshi, " toshi can you believe it? she walked and- and I was here to see it, oh my god she walked for the first time and I was here-" you choked on your own words hugging your little baby girl.

that night it was all you were able to talk about, and wakatoshi's heart jumped at how happy u looked and looking at your pretty face adorning the biggest smile it can carry, he determined that right then and there that he didn't have the heart to tell you that your daughter took her first steps with him earlier that day but seeing how distraught u were with how much little time you got with your baby, wakatoshi determined that this secret was something that he would carry with him until the day he died.

#ushijima x reader #wakatoshi ushijima #ushijima #ushijima x y/n #ushijima haikyuu #ushijima fanart #hq ushijima #ushijima angst #ushijima fluff #ushijima fic #ushijima comfort #ushijima scenarios #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima drabble #iwaizumi #haikyuu!! #hq angst #haikyuu #haikyu x reader #hq x y/n #haikyuu angst #wakatoshiushijima #wakatoshi x y/n #haikyuu wakatoshi #wakatoshi x reader #wakatoshi fluff #hq #hq headcanons #hq fluff #fluff

[izvmimi]

cw: angst. marriage mention. alcohol use. female pronouns. forgive me, polish speakers if anything is wrong pls dm me.

“Wódkę, proszę.”

The bartender gives the young man a look, scrutinizing his features carefully as he tries to assess the origin of the accent in his softly-spoken Polish or the quiet desolation in his eyes, and nods.

“Okej.”

In just a few moments that pass barely perceptibly, there is a glass of clear liquid set before him, and he ponders for a moment as he stares into the glass. It’s too dark in this dusty dive bar, a far drive from the venue where he should have been dancing the night away, spinning the love of his life in his arms, under the thankful, mirthful eyes of everyone he’s known and loved. Yet here he is, attempting to suffocate his feelings with vodka amongst strangers in a country he doesn’t entirely call home.

Perhaps there is some solace to that. Having his wedding overseas rather than Japan had sounded like an unnecessary decision but he had started this new life with you in this very place, and thus it felt fitting to plant the roots of your love in this very soil. Additionally, there was comfort in knowing that in a small way he was nobody here if he wanted to be. Mysterious like this liquid if it were in another glass, if presented to him not upon his request.

He takes a sip and it burns, and it’s somehow soothing, and quickly he shoots back as much of the drink as possible. The sudden gasp for air is loud and sharp, but the rest of the bar is loud and no one even offers him a glance.

He should have seen it coming. You were always so very anxious - not about your career, or your hopes and dreams, but about him, how you meshed together, how your lives would intertwine, how you would map out your family and future. One foot in and one foot out, while worrying the same for him. Jealous at times, needy at others. He’d hoped it was just a measure of how intense your love was for him, that you’d balk at the idea of any challenge, but really it was just your inability to trust him naturally.

He’s not sure what he could have done more for you. Held you more, kissed you more, been around more for you? Would it have been different if he had been more forthcoming with his admiration for you or been more aggressive sexually? Nicer haircuts? Grown a beard? Better fashion sense?

What did you need that he couldn’t offer you? He would have given you the sun, moon and stars on a platter if only you’d asked for it.

All he had asked for was for you to be there, to walk down the aisle to him, in the presence of family and friends. 

To be his wife.

You had agreed after all to do it. He’s not new to your indecisiveness, but this? This is far, far more sinister. 

The whole church was in disarray.

Where is the bride?

Where is his pride?

He asks for another drink, and downs it just as quickly. 

Wakatoshi left the second the wedding was called off, unaware of what the guests did thereafter. You were polite enough in your complete disregard for his heart to leave a note, and when he called you, the empty line made it clear you had not much more to say to explain yourself. 

So he’ll leave it at that. 

There are better ways to end a relationship, and if he thinks really really hard, there are probably worse ways, but this hurts. 

His friends are calling him, too, wondering why he has disappeared. Satori sends message after message that he’s not ready to respond to, and possibly never will. If only he could drown in this glass, he would. Perhaps then he could re-emerge as someone worthy of love or at the very least respect.

Perhaps reborn, you would love him enough to stand with him, tears in both of your eyes rather than streaming down wordlessly into his empty glass.

“Wódkę, proszę.”

#ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #mimi's notes #daydreams: hq #cw angst #cw alcohol