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#ushiten
kings-highway · 3 days
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Ushijima having nearly fluent English proficiency and the rest of the team is like "sure his dad is in america that makes sense ig" until Shirabu one day is like "wait no his dad is Japanese why would they need to speak English?" and Ushijima is always really confused by their questions. Leon asks like "hey how did you get such good English?" and Ushijima is like "Practice and repetition???" which doesnt help any of them figure out why until they eventually write it off as like "well Ushijima tends to be an overachiever, whatever" and move on. It isn't until Tendou hears Ushijima explain that he did, indeed, learn English because his father moved to America that he's able to piece together that that he doesnt mean "I learned it to communicate with him" but rather "I learned it because I thought I'd be able to go with him," and that evidently that didnt work but the skills stuck around anyway. just in case.
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northescere · 14 hours
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Haikyuu!! as things my friends and I have said (part 2)
edit: part 1
Once again some of these have been edited slightly to make more sense in Haikyuu context. 
warning: My friends and I say a lot of unhinged things which include a lot of swearing and like one sexual joke
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Tendou: Put whatever the fuck you want on pizza, just not in front of the Italians
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Daichi when someone falls asleep during study group: Can you please kick him and wake him up
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Tanaka: Noya what’s with the all caps bro
Nishinoya: I HAVE AN EXCUSE I GOT AN ANEURYSM TRYING TO DO MATH
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Hinata: (stepping onto the court and inhaling) Smell that volleyball scent
Kageyama: (frowning) Body odour? 
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Bokuto: I remember I once read that male tits are one of the most useless body parts. But what will gay people bite on when they’re fucking?
Kuroo: The feet? Obviously they would bite on the feet
Kenma: What the actual Hell
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Sakusa: My lap is cold for some reason
Atsumu: Need someone to sit on it?
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Suna: just backwards shrimp
Osamu: that is NOT how you solve scoliosis
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Tendou: If crossing lights are shaped like people, why aren’t traffic lights shaped like cars?
Ushiwaka: (eyes going wide)
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Tanaka (talking about Zyrtec): IT DOESN’T WORK.
Saeko: THEN DOWN THE WHOLE FUCKING BOTTLE, RYUU. TAKE IT LIKE A SHOT (aggressive drinking movements)
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Terushima: I won’t find a shit husband, I’ll find a piss husband
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(texting)
hoshiumi: im amazing. I know everything 
hirugami: are you god 😟😟😟
hoshiumi: no
hoshiumi: im a threat start running
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counsellor: has anyone here ever had a disagreement with their parents?
oikawa: I once had an argument with my dad over the existence of aliens
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redvh205 · 5 months
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Guys, I just found out that if I read a fic on ao3 and log out, I can give kudos as a guest, and when I log back in, I can give kudos with my account, and both is counted, which basically means I'm finally able to give fics kudos more than once!!!
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tamoru · 11 months
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he’s right 🐮🍫
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gravewlkr · 3 months
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winter ushiten
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soktokki · 1 year
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How my favorite teams spend their winter breaks 😭😭😭 TOGETHER ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥
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heinz-means-spleens · 3 months
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ideal ship dynamic: autism x the most severe psychological issues you've ever seen on a person
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klwl-truck · 10 months
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Summer with Ushijima and Tendou goes crazy
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calling us all out like this😭
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Tendou, at 3am: if you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens, you are a chicken tender
Ushijima, eyes wide staring at the ceiling:
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breakingpengui1 · 2 months
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happy lunar new year of the dragon!
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kings-highway · 21 days
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absolutely dumbass behaviour I think haikyuu ships would exhibit on days when there's no braincell to share
Daisuga: Daichi forgets the word for something and stands there snapping his fingers and thinking up synonyms and "sounds like" and various prompts to try and remember and Suga's guesses just keep getting more inaccurate and unhelpful
Iwaoi: Oikawa falls down icy steps in the winter and in his excitement to go make fun of him Iwaizumi falls down the same steps and ends up right beside him.
Ushiten: Tendou and Ushijima decided to cook dinner together and are not able explain how they got from point A to point "the oven is on fire."
Asanoya: They both forget to bring money when they go out to eat. They offer to work it off and the restaurant manager has to explain to them thats absolutely not how it works outside of TV.
Tsukkiyama: Tsukishima makes a statement that someone else fact checks and finds out is incorrect - both Tsukki and Yamaguchi then double down with 100% conviction that no, actually, Tsukki is right.
I was going to include Kagehina in this but honestly theyve never had even one braincell between them so everything I wrote just sounded like descriptions of canon.
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loolaaa · 9 months
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Female ushiten 😣
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kuroos-left-testicle · 4 months
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Tendou: Why do you like Disney so much?
Ushijima: Well, it's always been my dream.
Tendou: Becoming a Disney animator?
Ushijima: Becoming a Disney princess.
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tamoru · 1 year
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happy valentine’s day!
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midnightemy35 · 11 months
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Me whenever i see a fictional gay/lesbian ship: what if they adopted me
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