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#vamoose
robotspock · 2 years
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REALEST SHIT HES EVER SAID
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ash-greytree · 10 months
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It's time to bring back words such as "Zounds" and "Vamoose".
"Did you see that episode last night? Zounds, that was a good one"
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go on, roll your eyes || adam stanheight
SMUT!!!!! (minors dni tq)
x afab!gn!reader | 2306 words
this is my first time um ever writing smut for public consumption so i would love to start off by saying i do not know what i am doing! eye yam raw dogging this <3
id also love 2 say ily 4ever hot girls love saw discord server for literally inspiring this whole thing,, enjoy spotting things we said in chat :3
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Adam’s main goal is to make your eyes look directly into the back of your own head - conveniently, this is one of the things he does best. He barely has to try.
Doesn’t stop him from always giving it his all, though.
And he loves it. Loves it. 
Loves the way you lose yourself, the way your head falls back and you say his name like it’s the only part of reality your brain has held onto.
It happens when you’re at the mall - and God only knows why you’re even there, neither of you particularly like the mall - as he watches you in the afternoon sun from the skylight above. Watches you like you’re his world.
For all intents and purposes, it’s been a perfectly normal and sweet afternoon. 
“I’m just saying this mall wouldn’t have the reputation it does if anybody cleaned up after themselves,” You say, leaning on the food court table, “I mean look at that guy- five bucks says he gets up and leaves everything right where it is,”
“I’m not taking that bet, we both know you’re right,” Adam laughs and presses a kiss to your cheek, gentle smile on his face. 
You watch as the aforementioned guy stands up from where he was eating, wipes his hands on his pants, and abandons everything on his table - six steps away from a bin.
Time seems to slow down for Adam as you roll your eyes at the sight. His eyes glaze over - you, tangled in the sheets, twitching, on cloud 9. He feels like he’s there now, buried deep in you, filling you up, his teeth sinking into your collarbone and your nails in his back. 
His smile drops, his heart flutters, and… oh, there goes a rush of blood. How strange, such an innocuous motion can cause Adam to just about see stars.
“What’s up with you?” You ask, confused smile on your face. He doesn’t budge. He’s white knuckled, gripping the table. “Seriously, Adam, what’s going-“
But you recognise that look in his eyes. You know the way his breath stutters. 
Adam is falling apart. There is a tent growing under that table.
Suddenly a warm, trembling hand is on your wrist and you’re being dragged away from the table, leaving everything behind (and becoming the same as the person you were just mocking).
Before you really even register you’ve left the food court and entered somewhere else, your back is against a cool tiled wall and he’s pressed against you like he’s trying to crush you.
“God, you get me so worked up, you don’t even have to try,” His voice is a low rumble, halfway between a growl and a desperate plea.
“You can’t be serious,” You whisper into his ear as he kisses down your neck, “From one little eye roll?”
Suddenly his hand is on your face, gentle but firm, holding you in place so you have to maintain eye contact.
He can read it in your eyes, you’re no good at hiding it, not from him. He’s got you wrapped around his finger by now. You want him BAD.
He smirks, drinking in the sight of you like this. He hasn’t even touched you yet.
“If that’s all you think you did, then go on,” He challenges, and as he presses himself somehow even closer to you you can feel just how rock hard he is, “Roll your eyes,”
“Make me,” You bite back, and Adam just grins.
“Oh, I intend to,”
He doesn’t give you a chance to reply. He kisses you feverishly, like he’s on death row. His left hand stays on your face and his right drifts to your hip, his fingers digging into the flesh so hard he can feel the bone under his thumb. He presses one knee in the space between your legs.
You whimper into his mouth and he groans. He knows exactly what this mix of pain and pleasure does to you. He knows that he’s ripping you into ruin.
Adam then drops to his knees, like this bathroom stall is Church and you are holy. 
His eyes are wide and pleading, he looks almost hungry, like he’s been in the desert for a thousand years and you are a blessed mirage.
He looks at you like he’s going to eat you whole. In a way he is.
Adam raises his eyebrows for a second, just a twitch, as if to ask if you’re sure you want him doing this. You nod with vigour. How could you not want this? Adam and his perfect lips…
Your head falls back as he unzips your jeans, yanks them down with the gusto of someone who’s been waiting to unwrap their present for years. 
Your hand finds his hair. He lets a pathetic little groan fall from his lips in response - it gets louder when your nails graze his scalp. 
“God, look at you. Fucking barely holding it together,” He quips, kissing up your thighs, “Eager little whore,”
You try to speak, try to banter back; tell him he’s being mean. He swings one of your legs over his shoulder before you can, and he takes the words out of your mouth as he teases his fingers under the very edge of your underwear. He laughs low in his throat as your hips roll against nothing. He wants you so bad he could tear you to shreds about it. 
“Use your words,” He breathes, “C’mon, baby. You’re not that far gone yet, talk to me,”
“Please,” Whispered like a prayer, “Please, God, Adam- Please,”
“Good enough,” 
He tucks your underwear out of the way with one hand, his breath makes you quiver just a little as it hits your sensitive skin. 
“Needy slut,” 
One hand firmly gripping your thigh and the other allowing him access, Adam kisses along the very very sensitive inside of your thigh, until he reaches right beside the dripping wet, wanton hole that belonged, truly, to him. 
Oh, yes. Adam wants you to see stars. Adam wants you to walk out of here on legs made of jelly. Adam wants to make those eyes roll.
He presses his tongue flat against that bundle of nerves he knows how to find so well, and you cry out in a strangled voice - “Adam!”. He flicks his tongue and you twitch. 
Adam has never been this hard in his LIFE. His jeans are suddenly a prison. But he has to take care of you first, he has to make the risk of a public bathroom worth it. 
“God you taste perfect, baby,” He whispers, and then his tongue is right back where it was a second ago. 
There’s little gentleness involved. It’s like he’s trying to find a way to say he loves you, but the only way he can is through devouring. 
His tongue is harsh in its flicking, in how he focuses hard on your already sensitive clit, the way his nose gets pressed against you makes you worry he might hurt himself - but there’s no sign of him stopping. If anything he’s getting worse. 
Every noise you make eggs him on. Tentatively at first, he presses one long finger inside of you. When your back arches off the tile, you feel the way he moans, before he pulls the first one out only to add a second finger.
He’s like clockwork. You manage to find the will to look down again, to find he’s closed his eyes, focussed. 
He curls a finger inside of you, and you’re ashamed to admit how close you are to coming undone already. You don’t have to admit it though, Adam knows. He can feel you clenching around him, and if he had the brains right now to do it he might just laugh at how desperate you are. 
His fingers pound now, setting a pace that is quick and even but rough. Adam needs you. Adam could cum in his jeans right now from the way you squirm on his fingers alone. 
You rock back and forth against his face and he just about loses his mind. HIS eyes are in danger of rolling back. He eats you out like a man starved, like he’s begging for more despite being the one in control. 
It takes you over before you realise you’ve reached that point - no warning, and you’re jerking back and forth, a twitching mess, fingernails in his scalp - and you cum. It washes over you, and you have to grab Adam’s shoulder for stability. 
If he didn’t know any better, if he didn’t know what you always wanted (more), he’d stop here. Thank God Adam knows better. 
He retracts his fingers and watches as you clench on instinct around nothing. He wipes his mouth a little, but not enough to wipe the taste away. The taste he savours, the taste he craved and craves more often than he should ever admit. 
A wreck. He’s making a wreck of you. 
He stands, letting your leg fall back to where it can try to support you. 
You practically fall into his firm chest, and he chuckles down at you. 
“Good, hm?” He asks, as if he’s not sure, “You terrible thing,” 
You can only hum in response, half sex-drunk, clinging onto him for dear life. 
“Can’t get enough, can you?” 
He’s teasing you? This is his fault! That asshole-
You whimper again, and he comes undone. 
“Fine,” He concedes, making quick work of his own jeans, “Ready?”
You in fact started to nod before he’d even finished saying ‘ready. 
And then, bliss - you feel him start to line his thick cock up with your entrance, the very tip of the head poking just inside. 
You feel like you could gush just at that contact. 
He kisses you quickly as he presses himself in, catching the cry of pleasure and surprise that you let out between his lips. He groans, deep in his throat - a deeply, deeply satisfied sound. Adam’s been waiting so patiently. 
“Taking me so well,” his whisper fans across your face and you lose any contact with the world of words. 
Adam doesn’t wait any longer because he CAN’T. He pulls himself almost all the way out, only to slam himself back in again a second later. 
Adam fucks you like he hates your guts. Like he detests everything about you so much he has to rearrange your insides into something he can stand. 
“A-Adam,” You choke out, and if it weren’t for the hand he’s just begun to rest on your cheek, you’d forget that he loves you. The harsh feeling of his teeth in your neck, your collarbone, your shoulder… you’d be forgiven for forgetting that he’s capable of being gentle. You roll in time with the violent pace he’s set, your hips slapping together so hard you know it’ll bruise. 
“G…God,” He breathes against your now bruised neck, “You’re so good,” 
Your core tightens and you know the second orgasm is coming, quickly. You cry against him, fingers digging into his back. 
“Go on,”
It’s like it was a taught command. He tells you, you cum. 
He’s nowhere near done yet. He’s got too much in mind. He can’t stop until you’re all but faded away from that pretty little head of yours. Until you forget your own name, but remember his. 
His pace never lets up, never even pauses. You’re making sounds that are obscene, bordering on pornographic, and if Adam wasn’t so determined he’d bust right here and now.  
Your head is pressed against the tile again, crying out like an animal in heat, when his hand covers your mouth and he stops moving completely. 
A whine comes from you, unwillingly. You’d be embarrassed of the sound if you could be right now. 
“Sh, sh sh. Someone’s going past,” He whispers, pressing his sweaty forehead to your own, “Wait, baby. Don’t want to get caught, do you?”
You shake your head but your body betrays you. Adam watches, jaw dropping a little at just how fucking perfect you are as you squirm around him. He’s still fully inside, fully sheathed. He’s hitting every place in there and he’s STOCK STILL. It feels cruel, crueller when you realise how much he’s enjoying watching you suffer in the stillness. 
You whimper against his hand, and he only presses it to your face further. 
“Stay quiet,” 
There’s a threatening edge to his voice and it doesn’t take long to realise why. The thumb of the hand that’s not desperately silencing you reaches down and plays with your clit - you could explode at this point. He barely has to do much, you’re squirming so hard and he’s so close to letting go inside of you-
It seems he decides the threat to your privacy is gone, and your torture is over, as he kicks back into action like a machine again. 
He loses himself, now, it’s his turn. The most desperate sounds you’ve heard him make echo on the bathroom walls.
“God- Fuck, fuck- baby, I- Can I- Please, please, can I- I need to, I-“ He stutters against you, getting a little sloppy but no less violent in his thrusts, “Let me fill you,”
You keen and he takes it as a green light, painting your insides white with his orgasm, and your third of the day comes crashing over you as he grunts your name.
Everything gets tensed for a moment - his fingers in the skin of your face and your hip, his jaw. His head falls to your shoulder for a second. He catches his breath, slow final thrusts pushing his own spend in and back out of you. 
He looks at you now, assessing the job he did. 
“You beautiful thing,” He pants, swallowing harshly, “There they go. Those fuckin’ eyes,”
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meefy · 6 months
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Your Honour i just miss him
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scuddle-bubble101 · 7 months
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*so this actually happened and I am so sorry for the crummy sketch attempt gvdbhcbvhufjnvj
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va-moose · 6 months
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STARTING A PICREW CHAIN BECAUSE I WANNA. MAKE UR SONA IN THIS PICREW /NF
https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/2022755
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linkspussy · 9 months
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Hi new followers. Sorry about the piss kink
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yugiohcardsdaily · 11 months
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Sour Scheduling - Red Vinegar Vamoose
"Activate this card only if your opponent controls a card in this Set card's column; return all other cards in this card's column to the hand. Neither player can use the unused zones in this card's column. You can only control 1 'Sour Scheduling - Red Vinegar Vamoose'."
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I am taking the irrational anxiety that not only is someone else writing the same, high-specific set of fics, but that they might get there first and trapping it under a cup with a bit of paper so I can release it outside.
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ash-greytree · 1 year
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We gotta bring the word "vamoose" back into common usage
Basically un-vamoose "vamoose"
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emmagail-brainrot · 11 months
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“Y’know, I really like spending time together with you Abs. You’re a breath of fresh freakin’ air.”
“I’ll always be here to rescue you from the woes of stardom and subscribers Em.”
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va-moose · 6 months
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I DID ART GO LOOK AT IT
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ITS THE HOMIE @phytothecryptid ‘s SONA
VERY SWAG
LAMP POST
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hollowslantern · 2 years
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see you may think spy is a cat person because theyre more independant and generally quieter and would be adverse to dogs because they're loud and they slobber and while overall thats probably true I think he would be the kind of guy with some kind of perfectly trained sleek purebred dog with a face that knows something you don't. if he had a cat I think he would prefer to have a bingus because he cares too much about his clothes and would hate getting cat hair on everything he owns. also he would think he can keep a cat off his furniture. he cant.
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lizbethborden · 7 months
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I am litchrally just. This shit makes me despise him. He is a nice person but his inability to communicate, his inability to think or do ANYTHING in a straightforward, structured way... Why is he making $20k more than me a year when he can't find his ass with both hands? I don't get it.
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