#venting tag

[jennycalendar]

i don't love taking it seriously but there is something so weird and dislocating about like. ok. i had a summer where every second i was dealing with the mom stuff which is too many things to compress into one sentence. and then i went straight from that into a new apartment, a new job, and my first semester of grad school. and i still have my writing, and my friends, and all this stuff that i don't know how to interact normally with anymore, if at all.

it's not even like i keep on trying to pretend to be fine, it's just like i don't know how there's space in my life for me not to be fine. i don't know where that space is where i'm not fine. sometimes with friends maybe sort of but there's always that sense that the stuff i am tangled in takes up more space than i want it to. i don't love that so many people Know Now when i went a few good years not having this define me. i don't want it attached to me. even when i'm transparently not fine with people i love there's this part of my brain going -- this is them making an investment in the return of the person we all actually want back.

i want that girl back so so bad like it kills me every day. i feel like i cannot give anything right now in a way that will ever make up for the patience and kindness and space i have received to not be okay, and i rarely take people up on offered space BECAUSE i don't know what i can give back right now and i don't just want to take, and then end up taking accidentally anyway. i am so acutely aware lately of people i know for a fact that i have hurt and how i held myself so like my own mother in my own spiral-y desire to play the victim while refusing to interrogate my behavior. some parts of this are totally just growing pains etc but this just SUCKS.

#venting tag #i am getting on a plane tomorrow so of course my brain is like NOW is time for us to flip out for REAL #it just feels insane. #THE most traumatic summer of my life and the literal second it's over #i'm in grad school unpacking and setting up my house adjusting to a new job #i don't know how to process. i don't know how or where to not be fine #and it seems to be happening anyway?

[catfuyus]

sometimes going through my wips is so much fun ! I’ll see a great idea and go omg someone should totally write that ! ( ≧ᗜ≦)

#I’ll read the summary and go omg I would totally read that ! #I’m so annoying 😭 #venting tag

[lordcatwich]

my mental health has gone down the sewage system and I know it because I ate a KIMCHI AND CHEESE SANDWICH EARLIER

KIMCHI AND CHEESE

YUMMY KOREAN FERMENTED CABBAGE WITH SHARP CHEDDAR CHEESE ON TWO PIECES OF SHITTY SLICED WHITE BREAD

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME

I DIDN'T HATE IT EITHER I'M SOBBING (but I didn't really like it in that regard. So.)

God I fucking hate my life this week

I hate this year I hate it I hate it

#new tag guys #finn rose needs therapy #venting tag #really all i can do #because yes this is a vent #the fact that i consumed the entire sandwich upsets me #and just magnifies the fact that something is wrong with me #January 9th #just 7 days #i can make it #i will comit a vandalism if i can't make it

[thetriangletattoo]

the other day I took the lift going up to my sister's floor and when I opened the door one of my childhood most beloved toys was just there outside one of the doors. I lost it. I had completely forgot about it until I saw it and it all came back to me. I started asking questions to my sister. are the neighbours throwing it out, do you know where mine ended up, oh our sister took it for her child do you think she kept it. I wanted it so bad. now keep in mind we were getting ready to go to pride so it was a pretty hectic moment with getting ready and all of that and I was obsessing about this blue orange and white plastic rocking horse which by the way doesn't even reach my knee and I remember as huge.

i gave up trying to postpone the question so I called our sister and went where is it do you still have it is it in good conditions I want it. and well she did not have it anymore but she also reminded me it wasn't mine and she borrowed it from her friend. but the thing is while my other sister said look into it maybe you can get yours back and if you can't I'll ask the neighbours what they're doing with it all of this while recalling stories about that toy. this one was telling me what use would you have for it, you don't have the space, why do you want it.

and I don't know what my point is but I remember this conversation we had with my philosophy teacher years ago about how children growing up in the same house with the same parents are all so different. I don't remember where that convo started and what we were discussing exactly but the point was bc everything is the same but everything is different every time so children come up different.

and there we were, three sisters every one with their own reaction to the same topic. it's true that I don't have any use or space for that toy but it makes me happy and I love it and it's a memory and I would put it exactly where my sister would put the just as useless crystal vase she bought at the store.

#idk what this is I'm on the bus and i was thinking back #i need to find a picture of this rocking horse #venting tag #i guess #I don't have a tag

[haysgrove]

still hella mad at my friends bc last Halloween i wanted to do smth fun and suggested we should all hang out on halloween and come with costumes and all of them agreed and were actually excited abt it. and mind you this idea happened like. two months in advance, and i kept reminding em bc yknow like hey get ur costumes ready! :]

but i was specially excited bc when i was a kid i never properly celebrated Halloween by dressing up and going trick or treating bc my mom didnt let me. And i told them this so many times in the past

and i made a full on costume and everything and spent a good while on it i was so excited

only to find out on that day that NONE of them was wearing a costume. And i innocently thought "maybe they have it in their bags" but nope. none of them had a costume

#one of em just. brought those typical masks u can find on the street but that's it #venting tag #if anyone wants to block this ✌️

[sigynbrynhildr]

I never speak in voice chat to avoid people misgendering or fetishizing me and come to find out someone actually dm'd my friend with a ton of personal questions like what's my agab and stuff like??? hate to be fucking right sometimes

#venting tag

[lastoneout]

Ya know when people told me "when you're finally safe enough that you can leave survival mode and start to let go of and process your c-ptsd/trauma things are probably going to get really, really bad before they slowly start to get better" I thought that was reasonable. I did not understand that by "things are going to get bad" they meant "you're going to find yourself in the worst mental state of your entire life, but dw, that means it's working" and tbh I simply wish someone had been more clear.

Edit: If everyone could please take a minute and think about what it must feel like to be struggling and then have multiple strangers say to your face that they find the prospect of going through what you're going through so horrifying that they'd rather kill themselves and then stop leaving comments like that I would greatly appreciate it.

#hply fuck y'all I haven't felt like this?? ever??? #tryinf to be gentle with myself #but I truly feel like I'm made of glass #personal #negative #vent #cw suicide mention #ask to tag

[kuchipatch1]

yall have got to be more normal about Southern people and I'm not kidding. enough of the Sweet Home Alabama incest jokes, enough of the idea that all Southerners are bigots and rednecks, and enough of the idea that the South has bad food. shut up about "trailer trash" and our accents and our hobbies!

do yall know how fucking nauseating it is to hear people only bring up my state to make jokes about people in poverty and incestuous relationships? how much shame I feel that I wasn't born up north like the Good Queers and Good Leftists with all the Civilised Folk with actual houses instead of small cramped trailers that have paper thin walls that I know won't protect me in a bad enough storm?

do yall know how frustrating it is to be trans in a place that wants to kill you and whenever you bring it up to people they say "well just move out" instead of sympathizing with you or offering help?

do yall understand how alienating it is to see huge masterposts of queer and mental health resources but none of them are in your state because theyre all up north? and nobody seems to want to fix this glaring issue because "they're all hicks anyways"

Southern people deserve better. we deserve to be taken seriously and given a voice in the queer community and the mental health space and leftist talks in general.

#this is kind of a vent honestly but ive been thinking abt it a lot #ask to tag #ok to reblog #southerners #queer #lgbt #neurodivergent #alabama #georgia #tennessee #texas #discourse #? #poverty #southern queer

[reikacchan]

don't give up

#idk if i should tag it as vent art but?? it's a vent... #vent art #self encouragement #art motivation #Edit November 2023: Please do not refer this post as a political matter #it's my personal vent art and I don't want it to become something related to politics

[cherrygummybears]

i’m halfway through my double shift at work today and i can feel the fever hitting me 😍😍 and i can’t leave because i couldn’t get anyone to take my shift 😍😍😍 FUCK

#venting tag

[jennycalendar]

sadgirl posting again i just … feel like maybe worse than being in an endless cycle of terrormisery is not being in it. maybe that is why this sucks so much. i keep saying i am nervous about going back to my mom at some point and forgetting how much she sucks and letting things get bad again, but i think maybe what is scary is that i spent a whole summer with her and realized her a hollow nothing person. i just felt annoyed and sad and like i was humoring her. we were walking around in the shell of something, and when i was little, that much, with her, would be almost more than i felt i deserved. now i just think about the rich gorgeous tapestry of love friends have made for me and put it next to her sad little thread that she borrowed from someone else and feel sick forever

#venting tag #ig!! #i think i am acknowledging it as a thing that happened but less manic or smth? #idk if it’s just bc i am tired today bc when rested i end up anxious and viscerally angry #sort of hoping that the sadness is progress. ever hopeful even when sad

[catfuyus]

i just feel like.. in another universe, the people who have me blocked & i could’ve really gotten along 🥺

#i must be super annoying #but it’s hard to know that without someone telling me but it’s rude to tell someone yknow ? #anyways that’s like 2 people i wanted to befriend that ended up blocking #maybe i have bad vibes but it could just be a number of nonpersonal things #it just made me a little sad 🥺 #i wish i could like fix myself or work on myself but I don’t know what specifically is wrong with me #and maybe it’s nothing at all maybe it’s not personal #anyways I just wanted to say it made me a little sad I guess #it is what it is #venting tag

[cupcakeshakesnake]

It took me too long to realize that not all the world is my enemy

[ID: A comic done mostly in black and white. A hound with a broken chain around its neck flees a cage and runs into two reaching hands. The hound bites one hand, drawing blood. Narration says, "When I fled my cage / I bit the hands that took me in / Because the only hand I'd ever known / was a bad one."

The hands, now with fresh bite marks, still reach out gently to the hound. ""We're not him." they said / and I knew what they meant / but I didn't understand."

Floating in white space: "Now I understand / but the damage is done."

A person enters a door, rolling a suitcase, saying "Hi" to two people on a couch, who look up from their newspapers and phones to say "Hey" and "Hi" back. The shadow of the person who entered the room stretches out before them-- a hound's, not a person's. Narration: "I'm so sorry / I couldn't help it / I couldn't help myself."

We see the hands of the people on the couch. Both have faded bite marks on them. "I was so blind, I forgot / that not all hands are made of iron." End ID]

(ID by @princess-of-purple-prose)

#comic #original art #blood tw #ask to tag #digital art #comic strip #life #trauma #vent art #snake's art

[thediktatortot]

Not people saying “Fandom has always been like this” in that vent post I made. No. It hasn’t always been like this. Fandom has NEVER been like this until recently and if you were in fandom pre-tumblr purge, pre-twitter, pre-netflix boom, pre-tiktok....then you would fucking know it was nothing like this.

We still had the drive to create. We still sold prints and charms and made zines...but it was never like this.

The introduction of streaming, binge shows that drop all at once, tiktok and vine RIP i still love u vine but you were the beginning of a particularly ugly era) creating this bite sized, quick paced ‘content’ era of creation and it bled out into fucking everything else.

Fandoms didn’t die down when the show ended or the season was over. You didn’t mass unfollow artist, writers or moots just because they changed fandoms. There wasn’t this need to please the algorithm in order for your posts to get seen by people and enjoyed.

Fandoms used to last YEARS. Star Trek is literally the oldest running fandom out there and you got people in there that could care less about the new stuff and still have been happily prancing through their fucking fifty year old fandom today. Hell, even SPN after all it’s fuckups and shitshows has a dedicated fanbase STILL creating tons of art and fic.

There is no patience anymore. No calm feeling of taking in fandom and friends at a pace that which doesn’t make you stressed and is still fun.

Do I blame fandom for this? Of course not, but people are complacent with it and start changing their vocab to accommodate and end up making the situation so deep it cant be fixed.

We call Art & Fic Content now, completely stripping the value of what it is to a level of consumerism instead of personal entertainment & community bonding.

#vent post #sorry for another vent #I saw a few tags and comments in that last vent that just make me angry

[borderlinejackiee]

#actually bpd #bpd feels #bpd problems #bpd #bpd vent #bpd fp #bpd mood #bpd shit #bpd stuff #bpd tag #bpd thoughts #borderline personality disorder #tw abuse #tw drugs #tw disordered eating #trauma #trauma vent

[inkskinned]

fucking hate it when the stuff everybody says "actually works" does actually work.

hate exercising and realizing i've let go of a lot of anxiety and anger because i've overturned my fight-or-flight response.

hate eating right and eating enough and eating 3 times a day and realizing i'm less anxious and i have more energy

hate journaling in my stupid notebook with my stupid bic ballpoint and realizing that i've actually started healing about something once i'm able to externalize it

hate forgiving myself hate complimenting myself more often hate treating myself with kindness hate taking a gratitude inventory hate having patience hate talking to myself gently

hate turning my little face up to the sun and taking deep breaths and looking at nature and grounding myself and realizing that i feel less burdened and more hopeful, more actually-here, that i am able to see the good sides of myself more clearly, that i am able to see not only how far i have to grow - but also how much growth i have already done & how much of my life i truly fill with light and laughter and love

horrible horrible horrible. hate it but i'm gonna do it tho